The crew talks about the absurd commercialism of every holiday!
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Episode Transcript
It's one hundred degrees outside. Let's go get our Christmas tree.
It's one more thing. I'm strong and getty. One more thing. Waw.
It's a texting related conversation. We'll get to them a
little bit, but first, some hilarity I'm hoping from Jimmy
Fallon on the Tonight Show last night. Well, guys, we're
heading into flu season. But great news.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
The FDA just authorized the first over the counter combination
COVID nineteen and flu test.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
Yeah, this test really does it all. Check out this commercial.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
The FDA's new combination COVID test is quick, reliable, and
easy to use. Simply collect your sample, drop it onto
the test strip, wait thirty minutes, and view year results.
The first line is the control line. A second line
means you have COVID. A third line means you have
the flu. Four lines means common cold, five lines means scurvy,
Six lines congress you're pregnant. Seven lines means you're not pregnant,
(00:53):
you just ate a big lunch. Eight lines means your
crush likes you back. Nine lines means you're such a
scorpioes means your friend Gary wants you to text him back.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
Text Gary back and no lines means you're dead.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
The new COVID and Crew tests now available at CBS
in our pre easter aisle.
Speaker 1 (01:10):
That was amazing. They're pre easter asle. The way they
do that at those big convenience stores. Oh my god,
just overwhelming amounts of whatever the next holiday is going
to be, right.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Right, it's a seasonal aisles.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
I was amazed by the things you can or can't
find at like a CBS or a Walgreens. I'm often
shocked that, wow, they have this, and often shocked that
they don't have this. Yeah, you know, like I need
some automotive to something or other, and they have that
than some other normal household thing I think, and they
don't carry that for some reason.
Speaker 4 (01:47):
I'm still lunged away by how early Christmas stuff starts
popping up each year.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
It's like creeping in closer to the summer. Yeah. That
that has been a point of humor, like my whole
adult life. But it's reached so much absurdity now that
I don't even it's practically year round. Yeah. Costco especially,
and I often think that, you know, they're a for
(02:15):
profit business and very smart, and they've got a tremendous
amount of data. I assume they wouldn't put the Halloween
stuff in there as soon as they take out the
fourth of July stuff unless it works somehow.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
Oh sure, right, Yeah, they have a certain amount of
floor space and they've done the data analysis. It's like
CBS or Walgreens or whatever with the season allisles. It's
just nobody goes there. Nobody goes shopping there to buy
Halloween decorations. But you see something the cute as an
impulse buy, they must make it work and you.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
Get your combination COVID flu test and head on home.
Speaker 4 (02:49):
A lot of companies now do the Christmas in July thing,
Christmas in July sales. I don't know why that irritates
me so much.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
What does that mean?
Speaker 4 (02:59):
They start selling Christmas products in July. It's just like
Black Friday in July. It's that's their thing. It's hey,
it's Christmas in July, and they just think it's the
greatest thing.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
I don't know why it annoys you in particular, Katie,
but you're an old soul. I just what what occurred
to me when I was raising my kids? And this
is such a weird example, but it works for me.
We used to in my generation wait all year for
the Christmas specials, the kids Christmas specials, Charlie Brown, Christmas Rudolph,
(03:34):
you know the rest of them. Yeah, Frosty, the dialed
back Snowman.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
I'm Frosty, I Q.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
You're what was the one with the heat Miser? And uh,
I don't know, it doesn't matter.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
Uh, but we used to Weiser the Abominable Snowman. Was
it its own thing?
Speaker 2 (03:56):
No, but of course the Grinch and uh and and
and yeah, the heat Miser and like the Winter Warlock,
Santa Claus is coming to town, I think right any
that had the hot puppet chick in it his love interest.
Whoo man, they spent some time on her wood. They
(04:17):
carved it up right anyway, stop action sexy, That's what
I say.
Speaker 1 (04:22):
Where were we he is talking about a puppet? Folks,
here we go.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
Oh but we'd wait all year for that, and then
it would be a very special thing. And then when
my kids were little, we just bought the VHS tapes
and everything is available all the time, and the concept
of the rhythms of the year unfolding just it's gone away.
(04:45):
Now it's everything all the time, which I think is
part of the reason people are so crazy.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
Yeah, it's the everything bagel for anybody who's seen the
movie that won the all the Oscars, everything everywhere, all
at once, m everything bagel. Yeah, I know. And I
can't tell if it's important or not. I really can't.
I know I preferred one or the other, but I
don't know if it's just a tiny, niche example of
(05:15):
something that changed for the worst but it doesn't have
any overall meeting, or if it says you say, it's
just all of life has become that. I don't know.
It's the second one.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
And here's my evidence as usual, and maybe this is
backward reasoning. I don't know. But human beings for millions
of years saw life unfold in a certain rhythm. We're
made for that. We're not made to be shopping for
parkas in June or throwing on an extra zebra fer
(05:48):
or whatever we have been. We have been, you know,
part of the turning of the seasons since mankind crawled
out of the primority you lose or evolved from the
minky or whatever your particular view of of early man is.
It's all about the rhythm of the year unfolding it
now not anymore.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
It's why we're so cuckoo. You couldn't go to the
village elders and say, let's do the harvest dance. It's
not harvest danced. There were six months away from the
harvest time.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
Let's do it.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
Why do we have to wait six months through the
harvest dance. Let's do it. It's a great dance.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
And with the way you shake your leg and then
you shake your leg. No, no, no, it's not harvest.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Get back in your hunt or whatever right you have.
It's enough. Are you a very complicated view of evolution
or something? I don't know what it is.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
Or don't you have a mammoth tusk to polish or
something else? I don't know a lot about prehistoric men.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
I think you need to reread Sapiens perhaps out all right,
don't you have an arrowhead to craft?
Speaker 2 (06:54):
You're on the arrowhead committee. Get to get to sharpen
or them with your with your stone axe.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
M I agree?
Speaker 4 (07:04):
Coming soon the Labor Days sale in February. Yeah, well,
I guess that's it.
Hosts And Creators
Joe Getty
Jack Armstrong
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
The Burden
The Burden is a documentary series that takes listeners into the hidden places where justice is done (and undone). It dives deep into the lives of heroes and villains. And it focuses a spotlight on those who triumph even when the odds are against them. Season 5 - The Burden: Death & Deceit in Alliance On April Fools Day 1999, 26-year-old Yvonne Layne was found murdered in her Alliance, Ohio home. David Thorne, her ex-boyfriend and father of one of her children, was instantly a suspect. Another young man admitted to the murder, and David breathed a sigh of relief, until the confessed murderer fingered David; “He paid me to do it.” David was sentenced to life without parole. Two decades later, Pulitzer winner and podcast host, Maggie Freleng (Bone Valley Season 3: Graves County, Wrongful Conviction, Suave) launched a “live” investigation into David's conviction alongside Jason Baldwin (himself wrongfully convicted as a member of the West Memphis Three). Maggie had come to believe that the entire investigation of David was botched by the tiny local police department, or worse, covered up the real killer. Was Maggie correct? Was David’s claim of innocence credible? In Death and Deceit in Alliance, Maggie recounts the case that launched her career, and ultimately, “broke” her.” The results will shock the listener and reduce Maggie to tears and self-doubt. This is not your typical wrongful conviction story. In fact, it turns the genre on its head. It asks the question: What if our champions are foolish? Season 4 - The Burden: Get the Money and Run “Trying to murder my father, this was the thing that put me on the path.” That’s Joe Loya and that path was bank robbery. Bank, bank, bank, bank, bank. In season 4 of The Burden: Get the Money and Run, we hear from Joe who was once the most prolific bank robber in Southern California, and beyond. He used disguises, body doubles, proxies. He leaped over counters, grabbed the money and ran. Even as the FBI was closing in. It was a showdown between a daring bank robber, and a patient FBI agent. Joe was no ordinary bank robber. He was bright, articulate, charismatic, and driven by a dark rage that he summoned up at will. In seven episodes, Joe tells all: the what, the how… and the why. Including why he tried to murder his father. Season 3 - The Burden: Avenger Miriam Lewin is one of Argentina’s leading journalists today. At 19 years old, she was kidnapped off the streets of Buenos Aires for her political activism and thrown into a concentration camp. Thousands of her fellow inmates were executed, tossed alive from a cargo plane into the ocean. Miriam, along with a handful of others, will survive the camp. Then as a journalist, she will wage a decades long campaign to bring her tormentors to justice. Avenger is about one woman’s triumphant battle against unbelievable odds to survive torture, claim justice for the crimes done against her and others like her, and change the future of her country. Season 2 - The Burden: Empire on Blood Empire on Blood is set in the Bronx, NY, in the early 90s, when two young drug dealers ruled an intersection known as “The Corner on Blood.” The boss, Calvin Buari, lived large. He and a protege swore they would build an empire on blood. Then the relationship frayed and the protege accused Calvin of a double homicide which he claimed he didn’t do. But did he? Award-winning journalist Steve Fishman spent seven years to answer that question. This is the story of one man’s last chance to overturn his life sentence. He may prevail, but someone’s gotta pay. The Burden: Empire on Blood is the director’s cut of the true crime classic which reached #1 on the charts when it was first released half a dozen years ago. Season 1 - The Burden In the 1990s, Detective Louis N. Scarcella was legendary. In a city overrun by violent crime, he cracked the toughest cases and put away the worst criminals. “The Hulk” was his nickname. Then the story changed. Scarcella ran into a group of convicted murderers who all say they are innocent. They turned themselves into jailhouse-lawyers and in prison founded a lway firm. When they realized Scarcella helped put many of them away, they set their sights on taking him down. And with the help of a NY Times reporter they have a chance. For years, Scarcella insisted he did nothing wrong. But that’s all he’d say. Until we tracked Scarcella to a sauna in a Russian bathhouse, where he started to talk..and talk and talk. “The guilty have gone free,” he whispered. And then agreed to take us into the belly of the beast. Welcome to The Burden.