Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
Due to the graphic nature of this program. Listener discretion
is advise.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
The Woody Show.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
This is the Woody Show. Insensitivity Training class is now
in session. A good morning, everybody. Today is Friday. It's
(00:49):
August twenty ninth, twenty twenty five. Hello and welcome. We
are the Woody Show. I'm whatdding that's great gory. We
got Menace, we got Gina Grant seabasses here, we got
Sammy Morgan, our social producer von, our video producer Bort
and Menji in the Who's thank you for being here
giving us some of your valuable time this morning. If
(01:12):
you want to give us any feedback on the show,
of course eight seven seven forty four Woodie, you do that,
find us follow us on social media at the Woody
Show coming up for you. On the show this morning,
we got, of course the fail stories and the dyq,
but also some Friday Dad jokes. Morgan gets to be
a whore for money, yeah, because that's what she likes
(01:35):
to do. What else she likes to earn extra money
on the side, and also a round of I hate
to break it to you, but and so it's one
of those you get to fill in the blank. Oh,
what do they say the heart of the truth, to
tell the heart the truth of the trend that tells it. Yeah,
I from you. So that is coming up for you
this morning here on the show, getting started with some
fact or bs. Your job is to determine is it
(01:59):
a fact or is it something just completely made up?
But some of these are they sound like they should
be bs. So it's it's tougher than you might think.
And uh yeah, so we've we've got some of those
for you that we're gonna have. So just you're gonna
go what just through.
Speaker 3 (02:15):
I can go through as many as you want. I
got yea infinite and you tell me because yeah, these
are these are crazy and not so crazy?
Speaker 1 (02:23):
Who knows? Okay, I'm really curious how Sea Bass is
going to do it, because I'm very smart. He likes
he likes to, uh yeah, even stuff he won't believe
a fire that he's standing in front of that's singing
the eyebrows off of his face. Your source, I'm not.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
Sure, So feel free to to keep score on your
own and see how many of you guts.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
All right, all right, all right, so the first one
for tell a lie to effects it sounds like bs.
Are they?
Speaker 3 (02:50):
Though Shakespeare invented the word banana while writing the play
The Tempest.
Speaker 4 (02:58):
I know he invented a lot of words, but was
it in reference to a banana?
Speaker 3 (03:02):
And I'm not going to do any like fake out
stuff like it was to just kidding. It was nine
and a half, like it's right around.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
I was thinking like maybe he invented he was the
first person to use the word banana, and then it
was later assigned to the fruit. I mean bananas, how
long they've been around? For a long time. It's been around,
it's been around. I'm gonna say that is sounds weird.
I'm gonna say true.
Speaker 5 (03:23):
I'm gonna say true as well. True's false? Say the
Shakespeare things are red a red herring?
Speaker 6 (03:28):
Oh false, Greg Sea bass I made it up?
Speaker 1 (03:37):
All right, all right? How long have been there? It's
been around long after long Behavian word organ.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
And did you know there's like fifty or probably more
varieties of banana?
Speaker 1 (03:47):
Oh yeah, there was once. That's fake. Oh you need
to make it okay? Oh no, no, no, that's my favorite.
Speaker 4 (03:53):
Bananas are these little tiny bananas that you can get
uh in Maui on your waists, on your way to
seven sacred pools. No, the blue ones, the ones that
allegedly taste like vanilla ice cream, I've never had them.
Speaker 1 (04:06):
I want that.
Speaker 7 (04:06):
I found a bunch of little bananas are adorable.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
Wild bananas originated in Southeast Asia Malaysia, Indonesia, and the
Philippines modern day around seven ten thousand years ago. Damn,
and not like the ones that we eat today. They
were filled with large, hard seeds that were not very sweet. Yum,
y okay. Freed them joints. Well, let's talk about this.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
Chainsaws were first invented for childbirth.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
I'm gonna say true, true false.
Speaker 4 (04:36):
I wanted to be false so bad.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
Because I thought it was unless I am misremembering, which
is all the time. Wasn't an invented for surgery for
amputations and things like that? They used it for bone surgeries.
I mean makes sense. I feel like I heard they
get quick. Yeah, all right, I'm gonna say false. Not
for childbirth, but for medical purposes. I'll say true. I'm
(05:02):
sure it was something medical, and why not be an
umbilical cord. I'm confident it's true. It's also confident for
an umbilical cord.
Speaker 3 (05:09):
According to Cosmopolitan, where I got all the facts.
Speaker 7 (05:13):
Quote unquote, it is true.
Speaker 3 (05:15):
They were developed in Scotland in the late eighteenth century
to help speed up the process of widening the pubic
area and the removal of disease laden bones.
Speaker 1 (05:27):
With a chainsaw came in exactly.
Speaker 8 (05:30):
I actually learned in that and a meme last week.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
That's funny.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
Yeah, women don't feel paind bust out the hack saw.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
All right, let's keep going.
Speaker 3 (05:39):
It is illegal to own just one guinea pig in Switzerland.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
Ah.
Speaker 4 (05:46):
I would say true, because yeah, there's a lot of
you know, countries that just don't allow certain animals.
Speaker 8 (05:53):
I think they're like pack animals.
Speaker 7 (05:55):
They're not saying they don't allow them.
Speaker 8 (05:57):
You can't you need to have at least too, like
you can't us have one.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
He needs a friend. Oh really, Art, Yeah, I will
say true. I say false. Then that's so strange. I'm
gonna say true because they they want to do population control.
Speaker 3 (06:15):
No, it's true, because it's considered animal abuse because they're
social beings, they get lonely.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
That's what Bort's been saying. That was that one was
for Bort Sam. He's been saying. That's what Bort's been saying,
all right, moving right along.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Competitive art used to be yep, competitive art used to
be an Olympic sport.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
Competitive arts art is an Olympic sports.
Speaker 7 (06:36):
Olympic sport.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
Yeah, there used to be a lot of dumb sports
back then. No, because I think it's so. I guess
judges' scores are arbitrary, but they're usually based on some
type of technical element and the execution. There, I'm gonna
say false. I think I want to say true, but
just for odds of we just had two trees in
our row. Okay, so that's your reason. Yeah, that's why not.
(07:01):
It's a super game. Okay, all right. False.
Speaker 7 (07:04):
As insane as it sounds, it's true.
Speaker 3 (07:07):
Between nineteen twelve and nineteen forty eight, the Olympics awarded
medals for music, painting, sculpture and architecture.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
Allegedly, God, just when you thought I couldn't get any dumber,
now it's break dancing. Yeah. Right, by the way, Greg's
mom texted me again, yeah uh and sent me another
one of your oh no show us please hold on,
And this one I'm like, I'm like, Greg did that? Yeah?
(07:37):
Greg beautiful?
Speaker 5 (07:38):
I hate you call it your mom. Angle of a
clearing in a marsh looks like it.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
Looks like dream or something. Bob Ross w.
Speaker 5 (07:53):
Ross where you're hiding in a duck blind school says,
here's anothergory masterpiece.
Speaker 7 (08:02):
You're very talented.
Speaker 1 (08:03):
Have a wonderful week regards. So anyway, I was like, hey,
great to hear from you. It's an amazing piece of arts.
Should really be behind glass. The activists don't throw soup on it,
you know. I hope you guys are holding up. Wife
and I are thinking of you often, and they go,
we're hanging in there. We think of you both with
fond recollections. I'm like, this is where, this is where, yeah,
(08:29):
stay well hydrated and happy. Yeah, like that is so Greg's.
Speaker 9 (08:34):
Parents recollections so sweet. Yes, that's sweet. Ye already. I
hope that that's the end of it. I think that's
all the paintings.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
She's going to bring stuff up out of the Out
of the Vault. Dude released just Today's Tell a Lie
Day and Gena's reading some facts. It sound like they
could be complete bs, but some of them are actually true.
Had a lot of true ones I didn't believe.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
But yeah, cats per at a frequency that can recharge
small electronic devices like watches.
Speaker 1 (09:14):
Say it again, cats per.
Speaker 3 (09:16):
At a frequency that can recharge small electronic devices like watches.
Speaker 1 (09:21):
It's got to be sounds like some dumb thing that
cat lovers like like to believe that. They would love
to believe that they have, like some kind of crazy
reg Yeah. Yeah, they're not just dumb cats.
Speaker 9 (09:31):
They're the only thing I know about cats is that
every type of cat, lion, house cat, anything, they all
purr at the same beats.
Speaker 1 (09:40):
I believe that. But you thought that all domestic house
cats were female for the longest time up until he
was like forty some years old. Well, they're so girly
yeline females exactly.
Speaker 5 (09:53):
If human watches can charge by human movement, why couldn't
an audible Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
I believe it charged by human movement because you're there's
something inside that it causes it to move, because your
arm or whatever's maybe that's cats. Yeah, vocal vibration, larynx
or whatever it is. I believe it can do it.
I think false false.
Speaker 10 (10:13):
Uh.
Speaker 7 (10:14):
As much as I would love this as a cat lover, it's.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Fakes, all right, right, and give us one more.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
Okay, let's make it a real good one. The last
letter added to the English alphabet was J.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Everybody knows it's z.
Speaker 10 (10:37):
Z.
Speaker 1 (10:38):
No.
Speaker 4 (10:40):
That's a good question, Jay, that has to be false
because it wasn't like Jehovah or something. He's that was Wait,
where's this going?
Speaker 1 (10:50):
No, it is in like in the Bible and stuff.
That's a good point.
Speaker 9 (10:54):
But we learned in Indiana, Jones, that Jehovah starts.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
With the I. I mean, Greg, God, I mean Indiana. Ill.
There's no like biblical person that starts with the J. Joseph, Yeah, Jake, that's.
Speaker 7 (11:10):
Right, Yeah, yeah, job yeah, g like an terested development.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
I'm saying false.
Speaker 9 (11:16):
Okay, I'll say that's so weird. I'm gonna say yes,
language speak in the Bible.
Speaker 8 (11:21):
I'll say true as well, because it would be like Greig,
because it's so weird.
Speaker 1 (11:24):
Agree, true, Okay, so random? Why j Yeah? True?
Speaker 3 (11:29):
And Greg, you guys really should listen to his pop
culture trivia. The letter dates back to fifteen twenty four.
Speaker 6 (11:35):
Before that, the letter I was used for I and
Jay there.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
So smart and a great artist. Yeah he learned a lot.
Well there you go. There's some facts are crap. Yeah,
well my day. Thank you. Gina, you're welcome, call me
a good fun fact. We're gonna take a quick break
more what he shows next hand show. Yeah, Greg was
sharing with us how he finally came around. He was
(12:04):
late to the party on Nathan and Nathan Fielder. Nathan Fielder,
he's a genius. Yeah, he likes he likes that show. Yeah.
Speaker 9 (12:11):
I just watched when I admitted that that he's a
brand new thing. Yeah, oh yeah, yeah, I didn't play
it out. I think it was twelve years late, fifty
eight times.
Speaker 1 (12:21):
Well, in the spirit of what you're watching, I just
watched this program about Beaver's dude, best damn program I've
ever seen time for the dad jokes. Everybody's before Woody.
That's because he hasn't caught his breath yet.
Speaker 7 (12:38):
Doubled over.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
Yeah, seven seven forty four Woody text over to two
to nine eight seven dad jokes, fun, simple, punny. You
know all this stuff Callvin punks man.
Speaker 5 (12:51):
You get so caught up on semantics, right, But people
rein betting the wheel every four years.
Speaker 1 (12:56):
Yeah, isn't that. I mean, that's gotta be something to
look into people like. It's not I can see it.
Word Maybe it's like one word or one phrase, but
it's almost all of them. I agree. Yeah, so that's
got to be like some there's got to be something
to that.
Speaker 5 (13:09):
Yeah, right, is there a compulsion like standard something about maybe?
Speaker 1 (13:14):
I don't know dad jokes? Eight seven seven forty four.
What are let's say hi to Scott? Hey, good morning, Scott?
How are you, Scotty? Good morning? Are you guys? We're
doing fantastic? What's your dad joke? What do you call
a pile of kittens? What do you call a pile
of kittens? What a mountain? Horrible? Get it great because
(13:38):
it's kittens?
Speaker 11 (13:38):
Thank you?
Speaker 1 (13:40):
Wat seven seven forty four. What he texts over to
two to two nine eighty seven. Do you know what
Jeff Bezos does before bedwooting? What he puts his Amazon?
Speaker 12 (13:50):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (13:51):
I'm getting what Amazon? He puts his Amazon Amazon?
Speaker 3 (14:00):
You guys know how you follow Will Smith in the snow?
You just follow the fresh print like wow.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
Let's go to Candace re response, Good morning, Candace, good morning,
good morning?
Speaker 13 (14:14):
All right?
Speaker 1 (14:14):
What's your what's your dad joke?
Speaker 11 (14:16):
So?
Speaker 1 (14:17):
What do you get when you mix an elephant and
a rhinoceros? What do you get when you mix an
elephant and a rhinoceros. What I gotta get in all right, Kennis,
Thank you for the call. Appreciate you listening to the
Woody Show. Yes, Menace, did you hear about the girl
that ate a frog? I didn't.
Speaker 4 (14:37):
They say that she might croak frog getting nassy mess?
But the look on your face either or sucking on
a lemon? Or you didn't like that dad joke that
Menace had.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Do you have a better one? I've got a different
category blonde jokes, these old gems. Yeah, it's good.
Speaker 5 (14:53):
What do what do you call a blonde standing on
her head? What a brunette with bad breath?
Speaker 1 (15:00):
Joke? First of all, Box of the eighties right there
with the yo mama jokes? Yeah jokes. Yeah, Well was
the other blonde one? I? Oh yeah, uh? How did
the blonde drown? Scratching stiff sticker on the scratching sniff
(15:20):
sticker on the bottom of the bath toob? Yeah? What
sound does a witch's car make? Greg a witch's car?
What broom? Broom? Come on, come on, come on, let's
go to Johnny. Good morning, Johnny, Hey, good morning.
Speaker 11 (15:41):
I got a knock knock joke for you.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
Well, you won't stick with dag jokes. But yeah, Johnny,
that's you. Who's there dishes? His dish is Sean Connery.
Work's the way nails. They say that they have been comedy.
(16:06):
Timing is everything. I think it was the disjointed nature
of that that made it. I mean it was that
was amazing. Well either way, it's a good dad joke,
but the work of art. Yeah. Uh, there was a
break into guys at the wig factory, you know. Yeah,
the cops they're combing the air.
Speaker 11 (16:23):
In man.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
They called to clean the ocean? Who mermaids? The position
sixty nine will now be ninety six due to the tariffs,
So the cost of eating out has gone up.
Speaker 9 (16:37):
Yeah, I like that.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
That's on the text. Thank you nine o nine. Uh,
Matt has got another good one for us. Uh.
Speaker 4 (16:48):
Why did the car take a nap? Why it was tired?
I have one from Matic.
Speaker 1 (16:55):
It's a thinker day.
Speaker 9 (16:55):
Yeah, we know dogs can't operate an MRI test, but
cat scan let's say.
Speaker 1 (17:02):
Uh, Daryl, good morning, Daryl, good morning show. Now Darryl,
we're counting on you to bring the heat. Dude. Why
is the chicken not one across the road? Why do
the chicken not one across the road, Darryl, because there
were a chicken rafts on over there. Oh my god, yeah,
(17:23):
I support though. All right, let's go to uh, let's
go to Maverick. Hey, good morning, Maverick. Hey morning, all right,
thank you for bringing that Friday energy. What's your dad joke? Yeah?
Speaker 11 (17:36):
What do you give when you cross a mule with
an onion?
Speaker 1 (17:39):
What do you give when you cross a mule with
an onion? What a piece of ass? That'll bring it
here to your hell? All right, Maverick, thank you for
the call. Appreciate you. Listen, let's see it's gonna crush.
Let's see how to Jose? Good morning, Jose Yo?
Speaker 14 (17:59):
What up?
Speaker 1 (17:59):
Guys? What's your what's your dad joke? What is long green?
And smells like bacons? Long green? I think I know
long green? It smells like bacon?
Speaker 11 (18:10):
What finger? Hey?
Speaker 3 (18:15):
What what do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have
in common?
Speaker 1 (18:18):
What's that?
Speaker 15 (18:19):
They're both Paris sites. It's from the text. So why
did the blind man fall down the well? Well he
couldn't see that well?
Speaker 1 (18:30):
No, yeah, have you seen the news about the new
theatrical performance of puns? No, it's a great play on words. Jake,
Thank you. I did like that, Gina. Have you ever
had Ethiopian food? Yeah, it's coming, but it's great.
Speaker 4 (18:55):
Another great eighties joke. I love it, I got I
don't want to anymore. Yeah, I got one for seeing me.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Okay.
Speaker 4 (19:02):
Why do sweaters tend to hang out together?
Speaker 10 (19:05):
Why?
Speaker 1 (19:06):
Because they're pretty close knit? Today hitting jokes said, we haven't.
We haven't had really much from you.
Speaker 8 (19:13):
What do you call two monkeys that share an Amazon account?
Speaker 1 (19:15):
What?
Speaker 8 (19:16):
Prime mate?
Speaker 1 (19:18):
Horrible? Got it? You didn't break your Amazon jokes? All right,
they're very.
Speaker 5 (19:25):
What's the difference between blonde and brunette? What Sammy's forehead.
Speaker 1 (19:31):
Getting getting? Because on top of the e.
Speaker 16 (19:37):
I've been like that my whole life.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
But let's go to Let's go to Kristin. Hey, good morning, Kristin. Hello,
what's your dad joke?
Speaker 17 (19:47):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (19:47):
Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where
do you find a dog with no legs? Right where
you left it?
Speaker 16 (19:54):
Get okay?
Speaker 1 (19:56):
Because it's got no legs? Are you going to go? Everybody? Say? Hid?
To mic Mike? What's your dad joke? So?
Speaker 9 (20:05):
Where do pirates by their hooks at?
Speaker 1 (20:08):
Where do pirates buy their hooks at? Where the second
hand store. Yes, yes, they do, all right, Sea bass Sammy, Yes,
now there's that. Thanks for that clip. What does I
d K stand for?
Speaker 16 (20:27):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (20:27):
Oh my god, nobody does. There's you Dad jokes, everybody,
Woody shop and we are into another new hour. My
(20:48):
name is Woody. That is Greg Goringhi, Menace is here.
There's Sea Baske. Good morning to you. There's uh Morgan.
Sammy's here. Phone are open eight seven seven forty four, Woody.
That's eight seven seven forty four Wooding. You can send
us a text over to to nine eight seven. There's
(21:12):
this broad in Pennsylvania who was doing this thing where
she would make a bunch of hotel reservations and then
cancel them at the last minute. And she did this
hundreds of times, and I mean like four hundred times.
According to the report, he was ridicted, and even though
she was warned, hey, knock it off, she kept doing it.
(21:32):
And since the hotel's no show fee was only a
small cut of the full price, they lost a ton
of money. So back in January, one of the hotels
noticed forty four different reservations tied to this one credit
card just in that month, and she was using names
of local officials for some of these fake bookings, including
some of that had already died. She was arrested, charged
(21:54):
with theft and unlawful use of a computer, and as
part of her bail, she's banned from making hotel reservations
within two hundred miles where she lives. Oh my god,
that's about right, bitch, be tripping. Let's see.
Speaker 3 (22:07):
Best loves to say some sort of hack like can
you make them, then you cancel them, then you get
them for free, or you get.
Speaker 5 (22:13):
With airline tickets, like if you if you don't want
a middle seat, we can do as you buy all
the seats, all the middle seats, but then you cancel that, yes,
and then make your other reservation.
Speaker 11 (22:22):
You know.
Speaker 5 (22:22):
Yeah, but this is just not This sounds like a
crank with an axe grind.
Speaker 11 (22:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
Well, if you see a picture of her, you'll see
if you see a picture of her, we did like
one of those first impression deals. Yeah, yeah, tell me
how this person ended up in jail or how they
ended up getting arrest you'd be like, oh, makes sense, yeah, okay, Yeah,
she looks like somebody who have a cracker barrel, like
frequent diner card sitting a lot, and he buys all
(22:48):
their home decre from the cracker barrel, every sixty year
old woman in the South. Yeah, did you you pulled
the picture?
Speaker 16 (22:56):
Okay, Yeah, that's very accurate.
Speaker 1 (23:00):
With glasses, like a sixty year old thumb with glasses.
That's actually a pretty good descriptor looks just like that.
Most her endgame built like a nose tech. I don't
understand how that really worked. Well, I think I think
it's a crank. Yeah, it's somebody. She probably had a
beef with the hotel and she's also fixed the hotel
industry and I.
Speaker 7 (23:20):
Got nothing but time.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
Oh my guess.
Speaker 7 (23:23):
Yeah, she definitely has bodies under her floorboards.
Speaker 1 (23:25):
Yeah. I here's another bitch be tripping story, this time
about this woman who managed to pull off a disability
scam that lasted for sixteen years.
Speaker 7 (23:35):
Damn.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
She claims she was mute and as a result of
a traumatic incident at work, and she was collecting this
disability pension for more than a decade. She got busted
when they did a routine review of her case and
noticed that none of her doctors had mentioned anything about
her being unable to speak, so that raised a red flag.
The insurance company hired a private investigator, which my buddy does.
(23:59):
This guy used to work with in radio. All most
people around and stuff. I told you about that guy, right, yea, yeah,
he listens to the shows. He lives in Portland, Oregon,
and a lot of times he's sitting outside of some place,
like waiting for somebody or just keeping an eye on somebody,
and he listens to the show alive. But so much downtime,
so much downtime. He loves it. Last time I talked
(24:20):
about it, he loves it. I would bust people left
and right, and he gets hired for stuff like this. Anyway.
Sure enough, she was out in about living a pretty
non mute life. She was chatting it up with other
moms at the school pickup, she was talking on her phone,
going to workout classes, totally normal stuff, and so just
to be sure, the private investigator approached her one day
on the street asked for directions, and she gave it
(24:43):
very full, very clear, very vocal answer, not realizing that
she was being recorded, and that's how she got busted.
So her lawyer tried to get the recording thrown out
as evidence, but the court told her to suck it.
So not only is she off the payroll, the insurance
company is suing her to get back to sixteen years
(25:04):
worth of money.
Speaker 7 (25:04):
Yeah, what's the backpay on that? What's the total?
Speaker 1 (25:07):
I mean, I don't know, I'll know what she was doing.
Speaker 4 (25:08):
The money, I say to have. My favorite one was
that lady that said that she could barely walk and
her back was all messed up. And then she was
in the newspaper for the Christmas tree toss.
Speaker 1 (25:18):
Oh that shit, that's right. She's like, what I forgot
about that? Eight seven seven forty four Wood send us
a text over to two two nine eight seven. Charlie
Sheen's twenty one year old daughter, Sammy has become a
very popular OnlyFans model, as we've talked about before for her.
But where does she draw the line, Morgan, we've talked
(25:39):
about your only fans.
Speaker 16 (25:40):
Yeah, she has.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
Things she won't do. No sex, no full nudity speaking,
she says, quote, keep it very classy while still giving
people their money's worth.
Speaker 16 (25:53):
Yeah, is it not naked.
Speaker 1 (25:55):
But the list of things that she will do includes
foot stuff nice, which is the area.
Speaker 5 (26:01):
Which is the area that you're considering, Yes, dabbling in
put it put a toe in exactly.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
She says that her followers have requested weird things like
dipping my foot in the toilet. Done. I'll do it
right now. Yeah, do it for a dollar? She says
that dollar really to one dollar. Yeah, you'll dip your
foot in the toilet for a dollar?
Speaker 16 (26:23):
Yeah, like a clean toilet bowl?
Speaker 1 (26:25):
Or is there have to be at the radio station? Yeah?
Speaker 16 (26:28):
Yeah, yeah, flushes challenge ever?
Speaker 7 (26:32):
Yeah yeah, oh here comes a dollar.
Speaker 16 (26:35):
Well here's the thing though, No, no, no, I will
do it, but if you want a recording of it,
my toes aren't painted, so they're not cute. So do
I actually don't want you to see my toes right now?
Speaker 1 (26:44):
How bad could they end? About? Ten? Hold on? Ten
dollars a toe in?
Speaker 10 (26:49):
You?
Speaker 1 (26:49):
I gotta put your foot up to the ankle.
Speaker 16 (26:52):
Yeah, I'll sit in there all day, just till submerged.
Ten dollars an hour. I'll sit over there, all.
Speaker 1 (26:57):
Right, ten dollars, all right, ten dollars until this next
commercial breaks over?
Speaker 3 (27:02):
Why don't I record it like from the back, so
it's not like looking at her.
Speaker 16 (27:05):
I mean, y'all can see my gross foot here, but
ten dollars ten dollars to leave your foot in the
toilet up to your ankle until the commercial breaks over,
like go right now, yeah, okay, you'll do it. It's
gonna be okay if yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:17):
Thank for the listeners by this crazy call in okay,
so we can get you, so we can get you
on the phone. Get Yeah, don't leave until you've called in.
You know what else, Sammy she do you even know
the number? I don't even know the number. You can
flush to get the backline number here? Yeah? All right, yeah, board,
get her set up.
Speaker 5 (27:36):
Sammy Sheen got a nose job at the age of
twenty oh see goals Morgan.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
And now she's not only fan, so yeah, now she's
on only fan. Next next astronaut. I guess how about
if she want that nose job? Oh bad, pretty bad?
Ten bucks? Yeah, ten dollars closer.
Speaker 7 (27:52):
Yeah, every ten dollars counts.
Speaker 1 (27:54):
I love this comment talking about this Sammy Sheen foot
story or what she doesn't only fans? Is uh hear that,
Charlie Anonymous? Men are pleasuring themselves washing your precious daughter
dip her foot in the toilet and you and you
deserve it, and she goes, I have a daughter? Yeah?
Is that one of my angels. Yeah, oh is this Ah?
(28:14):
Is this Morgan on the line? Yeah? I mean someone
else their foot because it's it's the lines here. Put them.
You gotta put a you gotta put them on hold.
All right, I can pick it up in here. I
mean it's in the middle of the building. It might
not work all the way. I do have phone service issues.
I've done it. I did it in the bathroom, but
I had to do Yeah. Yeah, there you go, Morgan. Yeah,
(28:37):
all right, So you're you're in the echo, all right,
and the ladies. What if somebody walks in there and
you're just you're just sitting there. I mean I didn't
even lock the door.
Speaker 7 (28:46):
I was gonna say that door better stay open, you know.
Speaker 1 (28:49):
But can you imagine? Okay, so imagine like you walk
into work, You're like, you know what, I'm gonna hit
the restroom real quick before i put myself out of
my desk, and you walk in and then there's Morgan
with her foot and the toilet to her ankle, just
hanging out there. Wow on the phone. Yeah, I'm all right,
watch you go. Why don't you go check it? Check
it out? All right? Don't don't don't hang out Yeah,
Gina's on her way. She's like the Guinness Book the World, which.
Speaker 11 (29:11):
Kind of big.
Speaker 16 (29:12):
I have like a snize nine foot so it really
doesn't even go that far in.
Speaker 1 (29:16):
Oh did you did you play? Did you put it
in already? Oh?
Speaker 6 (29:19):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (29:19):
Was this?
Speaker 1 (29:20):
What's the way? Okay? Now that's fine? Said, that's right.
Can you hold the phone down there and splash around
a little bit of me here? Hold on here, listen,
watched it? Hey, Gina is her is her foot in there? Yeah?
Gina just got in here. She's taking a video.
Speaker 16 (29:42):
My calves looked real nice dang.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
All right, so you have to keep it in there
until the commercial breaks over and ten hold hours, do
anything right, We'll be right back the show. We'll be
right back. Now here's where it gets real. Yes, the
Woody Show will be right back. Show. How's the water? Morgan?
(30:05):
Is it cold? Oh?
Speaker 7 (30:09):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (30:09):
Her phone was good? Like the entire commercial break of course?
Was that a yup? It is? Is that a yep?
I think it was a no? Did she go all in? Morgan? Yeah,
you did it?
Speaker 11 (30:22):
It's up? All right?
Speaker 1 (30:25):
What you hang up the phone and then just come
back and come back in tell us all about it. Yeah,
leave like wet footprints, like a puppy coming back inside
from going out botty in the yard.
Speaker 5 (30:36):
You know what we are talking only fans. This is
a particular sub genre. Is a lady gets stuck in something,
let's say foot in toilets. Yeah, and then a man
approaches and things happen. Oh so like a hero, right damsel.
Speaker 7 (30:51):
And then he has found of flash afterwards?
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Well, so what was the total time of her foot
in the toilet? Ten minutes?
Speaker 16 (30:59):
Yeah, they're actually it's a big deal.
Speaker 1 (31:01):
It felt nice, it was it was a cold what's
the water? At first?
Speaker 16 (31:04):
It was cold like when you get in a pool
and it's a little chilly, but then you warm up
to like.
Speaker 1 (31:07):
Tamps in there or anything right stains like yeah, pootas.
Speaker 16 (31:12):
We're here so early. I think that might have been
the first toilet.
Speaker 3 (31:16):
I told you to flush it, so you get a
little whirlpool of that there for.
Speaker 1 (31:20):
Two quicken whole dollars, that's your money. What else? Will
you lick her toe? Now? How about for Morgan to
get that money? Would you?
Speaker 16 (31:34):
It was like, can I lock my own?
Speaker 7 (31:36):
Can Morgan lick her toe?
Speaker 4 (31:38):
If Morgan can get her nose job? Today I'll do it.
Speaker 16 (31:43):
I appreciate you looking up for my looks man.
Speaker 1 (31:44):
So that's that's a no. What I mean? I mean
there's a long way to go For eight thousand dollars.
Speaker 4 (31:49):
Yeah, for eight thousand dollars actually can get her nose
job money today.
Speaker 1 (31:53):
I'll do it right now. Now, foot on the table,
let's go, all right, sea bets. I thought that you
might be for this event. What that is the newest
sporting event coming to a screen near you. Sperm racing.
Sperm racing, and they've built a microscopic racetrack that mimics
the dynamics of a woman's reproductive system and guys go
(32:15):
head to head to see who's got the fastest swimmers.
I'm thinking, like, you always talk about being so superior,
and you got all these kids, like this would be
a really good competition. You're like the Michael Phelps of
the sperm race. And they don't let you into the
sperm donation program without good motility. So as they say,
the point is to bring attention to fertility and turn
(32:35):
health into a competition because it's something that you could
train for just like any other sport. How do you
make your sperm faster.
Speaker 5 (32:42):
How do you then, Well, what they advise when you're
a donor, like I was, selfishly self lesslie is they
say they they ideally refrain for at least two days.
That's it right now. That being said, I've done it,
you know, the day after five, and it worked out
just fine. I was never rejected for low speed.
Speaker 1 (33:04):
The new league will have everything the other sports have,
including press conferences, weigh ins, play by play commentary, and betting.
You'll be able to bet on the sperm races. You'll
be able to pick favorites, bet on the winners. First
race is going to feature competitors from U C, l
A and USC. Wow, it's a little crosstown rivalry. That
that's the ideal. Ag You want to get the young
(33:25):
college bucks out there with brains.
Speaker 9 (33:28):
So what do they procure the sample right then and
there behind a curtain or something, I mean, because it
has to be fresh.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
And then they got away why the palladium like a yeah,
you need space for spectators. Yeah that's odd. Yeah, but
sperm races, that's the thing. Now, do they need someone
perhaps to like make sure it tastes right or getting
are you? Are you voluntario? Because I know all, you
got to be a well rounded judge.
Speaker 5 (33:56):
You know, Hey, sure discussip experience, Yeah, discussing odor.
Speaker 1 (34:01):
Someone to get out of your hair, Henry say, hudo,
you know who that is, right the Oh?
Speaker 16 (34:05):
Yeah, he used to be a champ in UFC.
Speaker 1 (34:08):
So somebody broke into his house. His wife and kids
were asleep in the house. They I guess. There was
a detached studio that he's got that was broken into.
His first ever UFC championship belt was stolen, along with
ten thousand dollars worth of camera equipment that belonged to
his producer, who was asleep in the studio at the time.
(34:30):
So it sounds like an inside jobs.
Speaker 16 (34:32):
No one stopped them, he said.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
He just once his things returned, and if they are
he won't press charges, I guess, or kick the person's
teeth at the back of their neck. It's been interesting
times for him lately because this burglary just days after
he tackled and held down this alleged drunk driver who
tried to take off after he plowed his car into
his neighbor's house.
Speaker 16 (34:51):
Okay, I thought he was in the news.
Speaker 1 (34:53):
Yeah, yeah, So this guy's had an interesting week or
so street out.
Speaker 16 (34:56):
But yeah, I heard that have like a reward out
for the belt, because like, what are you going to
do with the belt? You can't sell it.
Speaker 1 (35:02):
All that stuff.
Speaker 4 (35:03):
Well, if you're watching the TV show Friends and Neighbors,
you go to the pawn shop and then there's a
secret room in the back of the pawn shop by
this kind of stuff. It's on Apple TV, not a sponsor.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
Yeah, there was a video of some guy talking smack
to some other dude. They're standing there in the aisle
of a stadium. It looks like, you know, just like
where people walk them down to get to their row
and their seat, and this guy he's talking smack to
it apparently is a fighter, and everybody's like, dude, this guy,
and he looks like the smaller of the two guys.
So the big guy think he's just using his size
(35:37):
to intimidate this smaller guy. But apparently this smaller guy's
death on wheels and he would have like ended this dude.
Speaker 4 (35:46):
That a lot of the smaller guys are into fighting.
Like when Morgan and I went to Power Slab, it
was nothing but short kings up in there, and they're
all ripped and they all could like take you down
in three seconds, because that's what they got.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
You know, they they're trained.
Speaker 16 (36:01):
Trained, they're lowered the ground, they're more agile, right.
Speaker 1 (36:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (36:04):
The guys who talk scrappy, guys who talk crap and Morgan,
you probably are meeting some of these guys are usually
the dudes who've taken like three months of some kind
of combat sport.
Speaker 1 (36:12):
So they like me, That's what I'm saying. So they
know just enough to not know how much they don't.
Speaker 16 (36:17):
Know, yes, and you get a little bit of ego going.
Speaker 5 (36:19):
And then the guys who know what they're doing, they
don't need to talk smack because they know what exactly.
Speaker 1 (36:23):
Are you still planning to have an actual fight?
Speaker 16 (36:25):
Yeah, that's the Actually have a call with the people today.
But my goal is by the end of the year.
We'll see what.
Speaker 1 (36:30):
Yeah that other fight we talked about, Anything happened with that?
Speaker 10 (36:32):
Oh?
Speaker 16 (36:33):
No, I need to email that guy again.
Speaker 1 (36:34):
Boxing boxing? Uh no, this one is awesome.
Speaker 4 (36:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 16 (36:37):
So the Official Pillow Fighting League, Yeah, someone reached out
to me from there and I was like, oh my god, Yes.
Speaker 1 (36:45):
If you put your foot in the toilet for ten dollars. Yeah,
but the pillow Fighting thing is on ESPN.
Speaker 16 (36:49):
Yeah it's actually legit. I would rule just crazy to me,
but then yeah, I haven't heard from them, so I'll
follow up.
Speaker 5 (36:55):
All right, it doesn't look super legit when I see it.
Speaker 1 (36:59):
It looks like some do. There's like backyard wrestling. Can
you put like pennies in it? What do you feel about?
Speaker 16 (37:04):
You know they're official because when he reached out to me,
he's like, we'll send you official pillows.
Speaker 1 (37:08):
To practice with and all this stuff.
Speaker 16 (37:10):
Official pill I guess they got lost in the mouth.
Speaker 1 (37:12):
They have to be a certain weight or whatever. They
like sony and handles and stuff. All right, My question
is have you taken a hit yet?
Speaker 16 (37:18):
I've sparred. I sparred for the first time two weeks ago. Yeah,
so I'm taking a hit, but not like an actual
real hit because when you spar you don't go full
force with something.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
It's like NFL players saying the speed and the intensity
and also the hitting, and you can't practice that. You
got to get into the game situation. So are you
worried about that?
Speaker 16 (37:36):
I'm not worried about it.
Speaker 7 (37:37):
I'm just kind of nervous.
Speaker 16 (37:38):
But I have a I have the sick feeling that
I'm going to like it and be good at getting.
Speaker 1 (37:43):
Yeah, I think so you feel alive. Yeah, I'm sure.
Speaker 5 (37:47):
It's not about pain threshold. It's about not getting not
falling asleep threshold.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
Is there a name for the style of fighting that
you're doing? Is it? I don't even know.
Speaker 16 (37:55):
What I'm training for. Is boxing? Because I'm too old
and uneducated in the fight world to get into mma.
Speaker 1 (38:01):
This really yeah, grappling.
Speaker 16 (38:03):
If I were to wrestle, I don't know anything about.
Speaker 5 (38:05):
The people who are champions now started jiu jitsu at
aged four.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
Yeah, yeah, they're amazing retiring by now.
Speaker 16 (38:12):
She was in Oh, they would be putting me to sleep.
So you're not doing the kicks. It's just I'm practicing
that in you know, my workouts. But no, when I
do an actual fight, it will just be boxing. Nothing
on the ground, you know, which I don't really like it,
but that's smart for me.
Speaker 1 (38:26):
Eight seven seven forty four, Woodie, you can send us
a text over to two two nine eight seven The
Woody Show. Now Morgan on the fighting thing, did you yes, Queen,
did you ever get in fights before you started fighting,
like so, just as a kid, like in school or trap?
Speaker 17 (38:49):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (38:49):
God.
Speaker 5 (38:49):
No.
Speaker 16 (38:50):
And that's what's so weird about me being into the
whole fight scene now, is I I don't know, maybe
five years ago hated violence still if there was a
street fight going on, I'd run away, you know. Yeah,
I'm kind of a little pussy when it comes to that.
But but now, like when it's organized violence, I went
into it.
Speaker 1 (39:08):
So what what attracted you to it? Like if that's
how you felt about, you know, stuff in the wild,
Like what what attracted you or what got you into
Was there a particular friend, were you dating somebody? I
know some people that got into stuff that way, like
other person they were with is in the football was
because of a guy? Yeah?
Speaker 16 (39:25):
Well it was my friend group, So my core friend
group that I see every Saturday. That's just what was
always playing in the background. And then after so many
months and as I got into it, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (39:34):
Yeah, Gen, did you ever get in a fight only
with family? No, I mean like a physical fight, I
mean really a physical with family with my brother?
Speaker 3 (39:42):
No?
Speaker 7 (39:43):
No, no, no, no, don't discount these these were.
Speaker 1 (39:46):
As adults, teens, teens, pretty rough, yeah, pretty rough? Who
I still kind of chalk that up to. Yeah, that's
a good question.
Speaker 3 (39:54):
Who won then yeah, probably you right, not even well,
you know when once the tears, you know, when the
blood started flowing, you know, I get the most Wow.
Speaker 1 (40:03):
But yeah, I mean we so not like sibling rivalry
kind of stuff. No, not brother and sister fighting, like
actual we threw down.
Speaker 16 (40:12):
Yeah, you should get into training.
Speaker 1 (40:15):
Yeah, I think I've left that behind. My daughter said
to my son last week or that we whatever was recently,
uh there were whatever he was He was messing with her,
and she goes, I'm going to kick you right in
the balls. And I thought it was so funny, sweet
little girl, I'm gonna kick you right in the balls.
Good for her, Yeah, knock it off. I had to
(40:39):
tell him because he she she was waiting and she
was being patient, but he was she reached. He was
testing her. For sure, you were getting a fight, Greg,
Not technically. I gott in.
Speaker 9 (40:53):
This situation where I pretended to chase a guy and
he fell down a hill and scraped his knees and
then he whipped around and started punching me, and I
punched him back and it got broken up in two seconds.
Speaker 1 (41:04):
So it sounds like, just by the way you described it,
that you won. Yeah. If I was another kid that
was always saying, everybody gather around.
Speaker 9 (41:10):
Ripped parents, bloody knees, and a couple of punches here
and there. But in general, like, if I think about
an actual fight, I couldn't do it for one second.
I couldn't go in to a boxing ring, no way,
especially you Morgan with wanting your nose job. So you're
getting into the thing that's going to be the biggest target,
not big size wise, but every boxer has a messed
(41:33):
up nose, right.
Speaker 16 (41:34):
Well that's the thing. I'm not getting a nose job
and then fighting. The goal is to fight and then
you know, yes, take me a while to make the
money to actually get a nose job, find a doctor
all that.
Speaker 1 (41:43):
So once you get the nose job, fighting over Oh yeah, of.
Speaker 16 (41:45):
Course I'm not wasting my money spiring. Yeah, no one's
touching my face after that.
Speaker 1 (41:49):
Madison, don't seem like you were a guy who got
in the fights. I got a few. Yeah, I got
arrested over one. You did, Yeah, as an adult, this
is adult. I was a junior. He was a senior.
Speaker 4 (42:03):
Yeah, he like stole some stuff from me. And then
he was talking smack. And then so I said hey,
meet me at my friend's house because we used to
have a break in between classes and I didn't think
he would show up, and he did, and I was like, well,
you got a fight. He punched me first, so it
was self defense, and then I broke his nose, and
(42:25):
then he went back to his parents' house with a
broken nose and bleeding all over the place, and then
they called the cops. His dad was actually a cop too,
but luckily my friends videotaped it and then so they
when I was at the police station, they go, we understand,
there's a tape, you know, can you provide the tape?
And I did, and it showed that he punched me first.
Speaker 1 (42:46):
I'm surprised, like a junior and a senior in high school,
they even went through all that because teenagers they you know,
it's the dad. That's how my friend Jo and I
became friends. Like we hated each other. We rode the
bus together every day to school, and it was just
one of those were I hated him, he hated me,
And it got to the point where one day on
the way home, it's like, all right, dude, when we
get off the bus, because we had the same bus
(43:07):
stop all right, dude. We get off the bus and
then you know, drop backpacks like you know, hockey players
dropping gloves, and we just beat the crap out of
each other.
Speaker 4 (43:14):
I did have two more fights after that, but it
was more Radio station one. It was awesome because I
went in with the hitter microphone to a bunch of
DJs and I talked back to them and one of
them got like legit pissed and wanted to fight me.
So they had me fight at a concert in front
of twenty two thousand people. And when I got got
face to face to him, I could see that his
lip was quivering shaking. I was like, oh, I got
(43:38):
this dude. I dropped him twice in front of twenty
two thousand people, which was awesome. And then the other
fight we did the previous warning show that was on.
We did blind boxing, so we all put on blindfolds
and we fought in like the hallway outside of the store.
We should do that, we should and just like just
wailing on each other, and I cracked this dude's tooth.
Speaker 1 (43:59):
Yeah did you have the terminology call you out? Yeah?
Oh yeah, yeah, what are you gonna call you out?
That's what happened when my first fight. Yeah, I brought
that guy's no, and at least back in this time,
like in the nineties, it was like early early early nineties.
Like the way the fight would always start between two dudes.
You'd have your arms out to your sides like this,
like almost like crucialfix kind of thing, and you'd be
like bumping chests like what are you gonna do? Go ahead, man,
(44:21):
go ahead, stupid. I had this one.
Speaker 4 (44:26):
I had this one in middle school where I headbutted
this guy when we got face to face, like yeah,
and to break his nose. No, but I got major
trouble from shuld it hurt you?
Speaker 1 (44:34):
Yeah, you're a man. No, my head cool? You know
my head is true, and it's cool when you're a
teenage not cool when you're an adult. Exactly. Now back
to the show, and it's another hour insensitivity training for
a twinically correct world. It is Friday morning. Yeah, gee,
(44:55):
thank you for being here. Give it us some of
your valuable time this week. Let's get into this weekend
as quick as we can. I'm Woody. That's great, Gory, Woody,
We've got menace. What is up? There's a Gina grand Hey, there,
Happy Friday, Sea Bass, there is Sammy phones are open.
Morian's taking your calls eight seven seven forty four. Woodie.
You can send us a text over to two to
(45:15):
nine eight seven. You're gonna need that number coming up
blitter on this hour, in fact, because we have the
Dumbass Contest, which on a Friday, of course, will be
the d U y Q. Yeah. Right now, time for
your Friday failed stories. All right, ladies and gentlemen, boys
(46:06):
and girls, it is time for your Friday fail story.
All people thought they had the perfect plan, the plan
that could never go wrong. Within somewhere along the line
it went from being a great idea to one big staken,
mega uber ultra fail our best. All right, well we'll
(46:45):
start with this one. We talked about this one earlier
this week, and I would be remiss. I'd be remissed
if I didn't tell you that's become one of our
favorite worst off the air. Yeah, I would be remaing.
And it also has to be in like some kind
of acts I tell you.
Speaker 4 (47:04):
I'll tell you all about tricycle.
Speaker 1 (47:08):
Yeah, I would be remiss if I didn't include this
in the failed stories. It's that US Navy super Hornet
fighter jet that accidentally fell off the aircraft carrier and
into the ocean. It's not expensive. It happened while the
jet was being towed out of the hangar bay. The
crew ended up losing control, which ended with both the
plane and the tow tractor going overboard. No big deal,
(47:30):
the plane itself only worth seventy million dollars minie. Oh no,
the Navy is investigating. But get this, this is the
second plane, the second super Hornet that they've lost on
this deployment. Yeah, yeah, yeah, to reevaluate that stuff. I
saw some video yesterday and they were talking about this
General Aviation aircraft that was circling around. This is like
(47:53):
way back in the forties maybe fifties, and it was
like a high, high wing plane and they're circling around
this aircraft carrier and the guy, the pilot kept trying
to drop a note out of the out of the
door so to get to let the guys on the
deck know what was going on. First one goes in
the water, second one goes into the water. Finally third
(48:16):
note drops it and the guy's like, look, I'm running
out of fuel. I'm not going to make it back
to land. I need to land on the carrier, okay, right,
And it was a US aircraft carrier. It goes, but
you got to make room. You got to get some
of these helicopters just out of the way, right. And
so instead of guys getting in the helicopters and flying away,
they pushed them off the edge of the aircraft carrier.
(48:38):
Why into the water. I forget, like two or three
two or three of these military helicopters pushed him into
the water. And here comes the guy. He lands on
the deck. He had his wife and his kids in
this little like Cessna type plane. Yeah, you know, and
and then he was yeah, and then and the guys
were all psyched, the guys who were on the deck
(48:59):
and there and clapping and everything else, while the helicopters
are on the ocean.
Speaker 10 (49:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (49:03):
So anyway, how you get a choppers out here? So
that was one of the questions. That was one of
the questions that they had, like would that still happen today?
Would they still be pushing because I think at the
time they said it was like less than two million
dollars worth of helicopters. Two million dollars back then, exactly exactly,
But I'm saying, would they still they still do the
same thing today. I don't think they would. I think
(49:24):
they try to figure something else out. Yeah, I would hope.
Just fly them off the aircraft car. You got a
couple guys who can fly helicopters right, circle around for
a bit. Yeah, the people laand let the guy land
and then put the helicopters back, and then I.
Speaker 8 (49:37):
Don't know, she didn't have time to circle around.
Speaker 1 (49:39):
Next up is this one in Colorado about this guy,
Lucas Brown is his name. He was locked up in jail.
He was working as one of those kitchen trustees. You know,
you can get those jobs where you have some trust
you've you know, they can do things in the kitchen
or maybe it's like a wood shop. Yeah, whatever. And
when he went to go take the trash out, he escaped,
didn't get very far. He was on the run for
(50:01):
a whole thirty five minutes. And this is my favorite
part of the story. He was scheduled to be released
two days later. Oh man, Obviously those plans have been canceled.
Speaker 9 (50:12):
Maybe he had to poop man and he didn't want
to poop right in front of it.
Speaker 1 (50:16):
Then gak no word on how much extra time is
being tacked on due to the escape attempt, But yeah failed,
he sailed. Here's one from Michigan where the nice people
at Saginaw County Animal Control got a call from this woman.
She had bought a couple of rabbits for her kids,
and they did what bunnies do, and they start breeding,
you know, rabbits ray, and she couldn't get them to stop,
(50:39):
and now her house has been overrun. She tried to
control the breeding, she said, she separated them and pens
in her basement, but they got around that. They nod
through drywall and other materials. The containment was damn near impossible.
She estimated they were around fifty altogether, but when animal
control got there, it was more like seventy. And many
(51:01):
of the horror chick rabbits were pregnant on top of
all that. So officials are doing everything they can to
play some in good homes, but at the same time
they're just reminding everybody that even well intentioned pet ownership
sometimes has some pretty unimeasurable situations without the proactive spang
and neutering that you're supposed to do. And they're bunny sales.
That's what bunnies do.
Speaker 5 (51:19):
Well.
Speaker 1 (51:20):
Sometimes you get so horny you gnaw through you all.
Speaker 4 (51:24):
Looking it up. I'm like, how long do rabbit stay pregnant?
And it said twenty eight to thirty five days.
Speaker 8 (51:29):
Oh yeah, it's quick. They have quick turned around.
Speaker 1 (51:31):
So she's a grandma already. Here's one from doublin, Ohio,
where this fella, Anthony Collier gets how old he is?
Greg I'm gonna go with sixty nine. Yeah he is. Oh,
he's sixty nine years old. He decided he was gonna
rob him bank, so he walked out of the bank.
He hands the teller a written note demanding the cash.
The teller gives them the money, and he takes off
(51:51):
in a super sweet blue Hyundai Tucson. Hell yeah, okay.
Cops able to track him down because in his rush
to get away, he ran a red light and when
they got the plate number from the Hundai, it turned
out to be a rental and guess whose name and
phone number was on the rental agreement? Say his it
says Anthony Collier. So he was arrested charge with felony
(52:12):
first degree aggravated robbery. Take it to fail jail sale,
and my favorite fail story of the week. This is
from Georgetown, Kentucky, which is about an hour east of Louisville,
and that's where this fifty year old guy, James Farthing,
he won big on the power ball, one hundred and
sixty seven point three million dollars. Big guys. He just
(52:36):
picked up his check this week. James splitting the award
with his seventy seven year old mother. So good son,
but they won't be enjoying any experiences together for a
while because James is in jail. The very next day
after picking up his check, he got into a fight
at a hotel that he was staying at. He punched
(52:57):
at least one other guy, and when the cops showed up,
James kicked one of the officers in the face. Right,
So he was charged for felony battery on a law
enforcement officer, among other things. And he's in even deeper
trouble because he's an ex convict. He was already on parole,
so kicking this cop in the face certainly violated that
(53:17):
parole and so now he's going to prison. Meant to
be what a dumbass happy?
Speaker 8 (53:26):
What did he have to be so angry about?
Speaker 9 (53:28):
Take a breath, chill out, count your money, walk away,
god man, pay somebody else to do it.
Speaker 1 (53:36):
Yeah, he's a real hair trigger. Yeah he couldn't help that.
Eight yeah, forty four. What he is? The phone number?
Use that number now to give us a call. We're
going to open up the phones for a round of
the dumb Ass Contest today. The duy Q is coming
up for us next. That's where SeaBASS is talking to
one of the drunks that he encounters on the streets
(53:56):
and asking them some questions. You just have to guess
will the person get it? Yes or no? Two out
of three times correct and you will be a winner.
You'll win some kind of prizem Not sure exactly what
it is, but we got a prize up for grabs.
If you want to play the d YQ, call now
eight seven seven forty four Woodies. We've got a dumb
(54:18):
ass contest for you, man, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls.
Today's dumb Ass contest is the.
Speaker 10 (54:26):
Cue you.
Speaker 1 (54:29):
If you want to play eight seven seven forty four,
Woody is the phone number. That's eight seven seven forty
four Wooding. You can send us a text to over
to two to nine eight seven what's this song? Oh
eight wall Nation kill your heroes? Thought, yeah, everyone, while
most of the time I'm not even paying attention. Huh
so I know there's a song or whatever playing, but yeah,
(54:51):
that's a good song. The song SI too. I love
sound Smember.
Speaker 4 (54:56):
We did that event with them and they did all
huper huge production of the song.
Speaker 1 (54:59):
Yeah yeah, nice dudes. Bit all right? Uh SeaBASS whytch.
You explain the way the game works, everybody, please.
Speaker 5 (55:04):
I asked a drunk person very easy questions, So the
game isn't for you to answer the questions. You and
everyone you know can answer these questions on the tip
of your tongue. The game is this, this person so
drunk that they don't know, So you guess whether they know,
and if you're right, two times out of three, you win.
Speaker 1 (55:17):
All right, eight seven, seven forty four woodie, And uh,
we're gonna get guesses from Menace and Sammy for no
reason at all. Well, Medace is on cold medication or something.
Speaker 4 (55:29):
The hell my, my eyes are just really strong.
Speaker 1 (55:32):
And he wasn't feeling well and so he was waiting
for the medication to come.
Speaker 4 (55:34):
Oh yeah, I'm fine, now, okay, you're good. My eyes
are killing me. Well hopefully man that brains a lot.
All right, Yeah, let's see how you do and we'll
go to U. Let's see Keona. Did I get that
name right?
Speaker 1 (55:44):
Keon?
Speaker 11 (55:46):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (55:47):
Hey Keona? How are you? Good morning? Happy Friday? Thank
you for calling you play the g U i Q
here on the Woody Show. Now, before we get to
the questions that actually count toward winning a prize or not,
we're gonna get to know the drunk person a little
bit better. And who is this person? Sea bass is.
Speaker 5 (56:00):
Jay and he's out drinking and so he will tell
you and he may have slipped in a few other things.
Speaker 1 (56:04):
Okay, here is Jay. What if you had to drink tonight?
I had like.
Speaker 2 (56:08):
A fireball and take you out some rice and a
lot of good stuff. I like vodka and a little
bit of cocaine.
Speaker 1 (56:21):
I'm sorry, like not that, I'm sorry.
Speaker 7 (56:23):
I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (56:24):
I'm feeling pretty drunk.
Speaker 2 (56:26):
I love everyone, like I hope everyone is having a
good night and like just get drunk us, like, have
a good night.
Speaker 1 (56:32):
What a sweetheart.
Speaker 7 (56:34):
I like him.
Speaker 1 (56:36):
This is not a greg thing.
Speaker 9 (56:37):
But with the gaze there just flair, verbal flare exactly, how.
Speaker 1 (56:43):
Can you not enjoy it or you do that noise
though with the bugs.
Speaker 9 (56:48):
That well, let's we've heard you. That's a reflex. This
is a happy I can't control that.
Speaker 1 (56:54):
Well, that is Jay, and you're just gonna have to
guess whether he's gonna know the answers these questions two
out of three in order to win. Uh.
Speaker 18 (57:01):
And the first question everybody ready, yes see U I Q?
And what part is your body? Would I find your femur?
Speaker 1 (57:09):
All right? This is a repeater probably yeah, probably m h.
Speaker 5 (57:14):
These two have been on a bit of a cold
streak recently, so I'm trying to help him out with
some easier stuff.
Speaker 7 (57:21):
Sammy did pretty good.
Speaker 1 (57:22):
Yeah, Sammy was okay last week. All right, so let's see.
I think that Jay will not j will not get it.
I think, hmmm, Sammy will get it. Menace. I can't
tell if it's the cold medication or if but I'm
gonna say no for Menace. All right, So they were
they were one out of three last week.
Speaker 3 (57:43):
I'm going to say thank you, no to Jay and
yes to Sammy and Menace.
Speaker 1 (57:48):
All right, Greg Gory, No to Ja. Yeah, I'm gonna
mix it up. Yes to Menace. Uh, menace and Sammy,
what do you think, Jake, get it right? Yes or no?
Speaker 15 (58:03):
No?
Speaker 1 (58:04):
No menace?
Speaker 10 (58:05):
No?
Speaker 1 (58:05):
All right, Keyona, what do you think, yester j j
No no.
Speaker 18 (58:12):
Question number one d u i Q And what part
of your body would I find your femur?
Speaker 1 (58:17):
Menace? Your upper leg like thigh type area? Sammy, your leg?
Your leg is the correct answer, Noice, Greg I said
yes to you, Mad All right. I'm pretty sure Jay
would know a thing or two about having a bone
in your body. You know what I'm saying. I'm just guessing.
(58:39):
I'm just guessing. But I don't think he's going to
know the answer to this question. If he doesn't, you're
gonna be on the board with your first point.
Speaker 18 (58:44):
And what part of your body would I find your femur?
Speaker 1 (58:47):
I guess ahead? Your head? What else going on your
head right now?
Speaker 14 (58:50):
To Jay?
Speaker 2 (58:51):
A lot of.
Speaker 1 (58:56):
Yeah, a lot of bones have been in his head,
that's right.
Speaker 4 (58:59):
And the reason I know the femur thing is because
remember my buddy half Big broke his femur.
Speaker 1 (59:05):
That's right. Oh, Keana, great news. You're on the board.
You got your first point here on the d u
i Q. Just need one more point to be The
winner this week was half big doing like a nine
hundred or something. No, he was just walking, okay, sorry.
Question number two for the d U I Q.
Speaker 17 (59:20):
What animal are sometimes people called as drunk as a
Oh god?
Speaker 1 (59:27):
What's the phrase?
Speaker 11 (59:28):
So?
Speaker 1 (59:29):
Yes for Sammy, I'm gonna say no for j yes
for menace?
Speaker 3 (59:37):
All right, I'm feeling a I'm feeling pretty optimistic. I'm
going triple yes, all right, Greg.
Speaker 1 (59:44):
Gory, I'm gonna triple yes it as well. All right,
all right, it's just going crazy menace, Sammy. Do you
think Jay gets it?
Speaker 4 (59:52):
No, I'm gonna say no, And I was gonna say
turtle all right, yes or no?
Speaker 1 (59:57):
Will Ja get it? J will not get it? Question
number two do you like? Q?
Speaker 17 (01:00:03):
What animal are sometimes people called as drunk.
Speaker 1 (01:00:07):
As a menace? Skunk? Sammy?
Speaker 8 (01:00:10):
Skunk?
Speaker 1 (01:00:11):
What animal are? All? Right? Interesting grammar there? But are people?
People are? That's the subject, right?
Speaker 17 (01:00:21):
What animal are sometimes people called as drunk as a people?
Speaker 1 (01:00:26):
Is horrifically worded? Wow about creative? That's so embarrassing. What
animal are? People sometimes are not understanding? Like if menace
I said it, it would just be you know that
tracks what? Okay? Some jokes there said that j would
(01:00:50):
not get this right. No, if that's the case, she
will be the winner of that. Do you i Q?
Here on question number.
Speaker 17 (01:00:54):
Two, what animal are sometimes people called as drunk as a.
Speaker 2 (01:00:59):
And an, I'm coyote because just sty're cute, but they're
not cute.
Speaker 1 (01:01:05):
All runt? Well, Kayota, congratulations you are the winner on
the d U i Q. Very simple work there to
the ke and hey, so happy for you. Congratulations. Hang
on one second, and we appreciate you listening to the Woodie Show.
Have yourself a great weekend.
Speaker 11 (01:01:23):
Okay, you to thank you.
Speaker 1 (01:01:26):
That's all right, bye, Well, and I love the logic.
Speaker 3 (01:01:30):
It's a coyote because sometimes they're cute and they're not.
Speaker 1 (01:01:33):
They're not cute.
Speaker 5 (01:01:34):
They can be cute, but they're not cute.
Speaker 1 (01:01:37):
I'm not cute.
Speaker 4 (01:01:39):
I mean yea like sometimes yeah babies.
Speaker 1 (01:01:45):
But every babies. Cue all right? Question number three, which
Keona did not need the U i Q, but just
for fundsies, here we got on the radio. A DJ
is short for what.
Speaker 10 (01:01:58):
All right?
Speaker 1 (01:01:58):
If this is not a yes for both Menace and.
Speaker 3 (01:02:02):
Sammy, Yeah, I'm confident in them.
Speaker 1 (01:02:05):
I bet you. There's a lot of interns in this building.
Speaker 5 (01:02:08):
Oh, yeah, who that's true, Morgan. That could be a
new assignment around the office.
Speaker 1 (01:02:13):
Morgan salespeople. Morgan, don't look but yeah, don't don't look
at your computer. Yeah, I know what it is. Guys,
come on, you know what it is. Okay, all right,
let's take guesses around the room, including.
Speaker 16 (01:02:27):
I'm not the hard word on this show. Yeah, Morgan,
but there's a reason I'm not included in the guessing.
Speaker 10 (01:02:35):
Right.
Speaker 1 (01:02:36):
Oh, she didn't say she said she's lashing out.
Speaker 16 (01:02:41):
I did not name Sammy at all.
Speaker 1 (01:02:42):
Maybe she's talking about it. You were lashing out, that's right.
Speaker 16 (01:02:45):
I just think it's funny'all. Think I wouldn't know it.
Speaker 1 (01:02:47):
Just because you're a young tel. I have nothing to
do with intelligence, had to do with age.
Speaker 16 (01:02:52):
Oh I mean I'm pirty.
Speaker 1 (01:02:55):
That's what I said. Yeah, I forgot. She is hell old.
She's like, where are the eight tracks? All right? What
do you think, Gina?
Speaker 3 (01:03:07):
I got burned by Jay, So yes to Sammy and
Menace and Morgan.
Speaker 7 (01:03:11):
No to Jay because that coyote answer was.
Speaker 1 (01:03:13):
No to Ja, yes to Menace, Yes to Sammy. And
since she's so confident, yes to Morgan. Greg Gory agreed,
I'm saying no only to j Yeah, okay, uh, here
we go. Question number three for the d U i
Q on the radio, a DJ is short for what now,
all three You're gonna say your answer at the same time,
(01:03:35):
Okay on the count of three, one, two, three, shocky?
All right? Nice? Nice? What are the discs referred to? Morgan?
Speaker 16 (01:03:47):
What do you mean compact?
Speaker 1 (01:03:48):
This I was coined before the compact disc. It would
have been for records record spinning the plant is that matter?
Pumping the wattage to college and make your damn I'm
up to my pits and hits, folks, cylinder hooking up
(01:04:09):
like a tow truck. On this two for Tuesday, we're
getting the let out this American graffiti over here. Yeah yeah,
make sure you tune it later on a mandatory Metallica
during wolf Man Jack. That's right, October, I forgot I'm
rocktober all right. Question number three for the d U
i Q on the radio. A DJ is short for
(01:04:33):
what for DJ do? What's the letter D? Letter J
short for it.
Speaker 2 (01:04:38):
For DJ, meaning like I could just play whatever they want?
Speaker 17 (01:04:42):
What is the D and the J stand for DJD
DJ It's like d J.
Speaker 1 (01:04:52):
Alright, like that j Well, that's the d u i Q.
Speaker 5 (01:04:56):
That's not disappoint We're gonna take a break More Woody
Show next, Hang on the show.
Speaker 1 (01:05:01):
We'll be right, We'll be right. We'll be right back.
SoCal Sports snick Jeff Ge and he's been doing a
bang up job all this week filling in for Jeff
g who is out. Yeah, but it's dumbass Tyler. He's
got the update on the SoCal Sports. Good warning everybody.
Speaker 14 (01:05:20):
Week one of the NFL season is officially less than
a week away, and to celebrate that fact, the Rams
and seven other teams released new rivalry jerseys for later
this season. These jerseys are something, with the Rams one
being well to be honest is not great. LA released
their Midnight Mode jerseys featuring dark blue colors and a
dark blue helmet, while the shoulders on the jersey are
the normal lighter color of blue. They're not the best
(01:05:42):
jerseys the league released yesterday, but they're also not the worst.
The Rams will wear them for play only once this year,
using them for their Week eleven matchup with Seattle in
college football. Week one kicked off last night and more
of this weekend's games tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (01:05:55):
Are some really good ones.
Speaker 14 (01:05:56):
USC will take on Missouri State tomorrow at four point
thirty on the Big Network, while UCLA will take on
Utah tomorrow at eight on Fox. There are also some
juicy national matchups, with of course number one Texas playing
number three Ohio State at nine, followed by number eight
Alabama versus Florida State at twelve thirty and number nine
LSU versus number four Clemson at four thirty.
Speaker 1 (01:06:16):
To wrap things up.
Speaker 14 (01:06:17):
Over in the NHL, Kings legend and center Onse Copadar
sat down with the media yesterday and for the first
time in years, he talked about the dreaded R word retirement.
Speaker 10 (01:06:26):
If I said I didn't think about it, I'd be
lying for sure. I've been thinking about it. Not everything
is quite decided yet, but this could be my last
season in the NHL.
Speaker 14 (01:06:40):
If this indeed is Coope's last season, then I want
the statue of him built outside of Crypto before the
last whistle sounds. In soccer, the Galaxy stay home and
try to fend off Orlando City FC at two on Sunday,
while LAFC also stays home to take on SDFC at
seven thirty on Sunday, going to baseball, and the Angels
are staying in Texas, this time heading to Hugh to
start a weekend series with the Astros starting at five
(01:07:02):
ten tonight. The Dodgers stay home and welcome in Arizona
for a crucial series with First Pitch tonight at seven
ten and Blake Snell on the Hill. And last, but
not least, in wrestling, w W will be holding their
clash in Paris, PLD on Sunday with a special start
time of ten am. I'm dumbass, Tyler and n'ts your
sokow sports dumbass Tyler.
Speaker 1 (01:07:20):
Everybody, nice job, Tyl. Thank you very much, Tyler, all right?
Telling people checking in on the text over to two
two nine eight seven eight one eight Happy Friday. Love
you guys. You make my mornings. Three one Oh you guys,
(01:07:41):
fing Rock and Woody. I loved hanging out with you
in Philly last year. You're the man. Okay, nice, thank
you for that. Taylor checking in Friday vibes today, I'm
looking cute but feeling like ish. Oh you and Menace Yeah,
Menace is looking cute looking at cut Yeah. And then
(01:08:01):
we got this one. Let's see nine three yeah nine
three six Morning guys and gals listening in from Dallas.
Love the show. Hope you all have a great weekend.
I'll be getting extremely blazed and we'll slip into a
stoned euphoria. Oh we love it. Hell yeah. Any kind
of weekend plans Friday check ins? Hit us up on
(01:08:23):
the text open to two to nine eight seven. All right,
do you buy it? This woman in China claims that
she got herpies from holding a carry karaoke mike too
close to her mouth. I can see that. Is that possible?
Speaker 17 (01:08:37):
Maybe?
Speaker 1 (01:08:37):
She says, it happened back in twenty seventeen, and then
a few days later she noticed painful blisters popping up.
But would it be a few days that I don't know.
That's not instant, right, I know, but a few days
seems short? Yeah, like maybe it'll be like have to
how does it take good? She gotta checked out in
boom HSV one. That's the virus that causes cold sores,
(01:09:01):
and it's for life, no cure, just occasional flare ups.
You mes, you know, manage it and stuff. But you
to twenty days?
Speaker 4 (01:09:05):
Yep?
Speaker 1 (01:09:06):
Okay, So by doctors having confirmed if it's even possible
to catch herpes just from the microphone. But either way, Uh, hey,
if you're doing karaoke, why would you are putting you
to it? Why would you put that microphone to your lips,
like let your lips touch that thing? Ye kind of
the song?
Speaker 9 (01:09:24):
Yeah, you're feeling the vibe. Yeah, just getting way into it.
Speaker 1 (01:09:27):
Yeah, well, I mean, look, karaoke can be fun. There
are situations where it can be fun. It's not one
of those things are good. It's not one of those
things it's all the time fun. Like the people that
they go to karaoke all the time. Oh yeah, but
if you happen to be somewhere, like you didn't go
there seeking out karaoke, but there happens to be karaoke,
(01:09:48):
that's where it could be fun. I think it's weird
seeking it out.
Speaker 4 (01:09:51):
I agree, really, because that's where the people are good.
Speaker 1 (01:09:54):
Yeah, that's why that's why they take it's too serious exactly.
I don't want it where the people are taking it
real serious. It's like it's fun on the shoot pool, right.
I find it not so fun when you get the
guys walking in they're bringing their own pool cubes and
start every cause they take it. It's like I don't
know how you take something, so I don't know. It's
like a pastime. It's like taking horseshoes too serious. It's
(01:10:16):
just supposed to be fun. Bowling.
Speaker 7 (01:10:18):
Who are you auditioning for?
Speaker 1 (01:10:19):
This is? This is another thing I took way too
serious bowling. I got to remember I joined the league.
This is years ago the company I was working for.
At a Christmas party, I had so much fun. I
joined the league part of my all or nothing personnelity,
right and uh and so. But yeah, now it's like
I look back and I go, how stupid like bowling?
Like you're at a place where the beer is served
(01:10:39):
in bottle shaped like bowling pins. It's it's meant to be.
Let's get drunk and fun enrolla.
Speaker 9 (01:10:45):
But also as a patron, I don't want to hear
Joe Blow singing a song. There's this guy and he sucks.
Speaker 4 (01:10:52):
Kind of The story recently got shared online, which I
would have loved to witness. That h chaperone was at
some like, I don't know, outdoor barbecue place in what Chita,
and some guy was doing karaoke and then he asked
people like, oh, anybody want to do a duet? And
her friends like said, go do it, go do it,
and then out of nowhere you have Chopper and no
(01:11:15):
one knows, no one knew who she was at the time.
Just have somebody be an incredible singer out of know where.
That would be kind of cool.
Speaker 1 (01:11:21):
I think the worst carry very rare. I think the
worst karaoke ever saw medicine. I were both of this
wedding and one of our really good friends got married,
and like was it was it the brother or the
cousin or something like one of the family members got
up there and and did billie idol rebel yell and
here I captured this just on my phone. Let me
get into there now, correct me if I'm wrong. Menace
(01:12:01):
this family member Filipino deploy Like that's a disappointment to
the family. It's a disapployment to all Filipinosilipinos they're known
for being amazing at karaoke. Oh yeah, they take you away.
Speaker 9 (01:12:14):
Serious, Yeah, but this is what I think of when
I think about karaoke. Yeah, I don't want to be
sitting at a bar having a beer and this guy's
up there.
Speaker 1 (01:12:22):
But if it's one of your friends, That's what I'm saying,
Like just you not so good. But if you like,
if we all went at someplace.
Speaker 19 (01:12:35):
Yeah it was a wedding, Yeah, it's a wedding.
Speaker 1 (01:12:42):
It was kind of late in the night.
Speaker 4 (01:12:43):
Everybody was Luckily I was able to walk out, turning
up and stuff separated from them.
Speaker 1 (01:12:46):
My wife broke the bottom of her champagne flute or
whatever it was. So she's walking around with basically like
a crystal dagger and she's barefoot. She took off her
uncomfortable with very nice shoes. Possibly it was that time
of the night. You know, I get it, and uh yeah,
I don't even like live music at places. Agreed with bands,
(01:13:08):
I agree, But again I think it has to be
the perfect storm for karaoke. Like if we all, like, okay,
everybody in this room, we were all out somewhere just
kind of hanging out casually and whatever and just getting
man got up there, we would all think it would
be fun because medicines up there. I wouldn't do that.
Gina got up there. Let's assume you were fun for
a second. I am fun. Yeah, even I would get
up there. And I mean, you know, everybody got a
(01:13:30):
sign that they're saying. But I'm with menace.
Speaker 9 (01:13:32):
Even a band that does this as a quote profession
I don't want to one end.
Speaker 1 (01:13:38):
Remember we walked into that one place and once they
had the live no right, yeah, what I do, turned
right around. He walked out. Everybody just went in there
to go like, Okay, we'll go in this area because
it's supposed to be like a really cool space, like
a like a hidden but you were there for that.
Speaker 7 (01:13:55):
He walked out.
Speaker 1 (01:13:56):
Yeah, So like we just want to take a look,
give one drink. We're not gonna be hanging out. We're
just gonna get one drink and leave. We literally walked in.
We were there for twenty five seconds. Where's menace? He
already walked out. Yeah, I told you. One of the
worst experiences of my life.
Speaker 4 (01:14:11):
I was at STK restaurant in Orlando and they had
a DJ and I was like, okay, cool, but then
there was some live saxophone player like playing the whole time.
Speaker 1 (01:14:21):
It was a freaking torture.
Speaker 4 (01:14:25):
And uh, I'm like why And I went on online
and complained.
Speaker 1 (01:14:31):
That's a very sea bass. Why would you do this?
That sounds like something you would all this and can
we can we quit it with the fake speakeasies. Now,
it's not the twenties. You're not being cute.
Speaker 7 (01:14:41):
It is cute.
Speaker 1 (01:14:42):
I like them, of course you do. Because you're walking
through a hidden door is fun. Yeah, it's it's intentional.
It's not actually a speakeasy. Okay, here's it's not prohibition.
I didn't know it was there until I knew it
was there. True, I mean I walked by this. Yeah,
one hundred times. They did their job. I just wish
they had DJ that would have been cool. Eight seven
seven forty four Wooding The Woody Show got another new
(01:15:07):
hour insensitivity training for a politically correct world. Appreciate shit
being here with us today. Phones open eight seven seven
forty four, Woody. That's eight seven seven forty four Woody.
You can send us a text over to two to
nine eight seven. I want to get into this this topic.
(01:15:28):
It's that I hate to break it to you, but
now Greg had his situation, any situation. The update with
that the garbage.
Speaker 9 (01:15:37):
Cans one, Well, there's two main offenders that are side
by side houses. One has kind of gotten better. They
still have what I call the indoor trash can right
by their mailbox. Yeah, but then the one to the
house to the right of that. They still leave their
cans out seven days a week, twenty four to seven. Okay,
and it still looks dumpy, and it's still in the way,
it's out in the street.
Speaker 1 (01:15:57):
Who hadn't heard the situation, you know, Grace got these neighbors.
It's like, you're supposed to put the trash cans out
the day that the trash gets picked up, but it's
out there all the time, and it just keeps getting
bigger and bigger. They have more and more cans. They
have stuff outside sitting outside of the trash cans. And
then the Sea Bass went and put the postcards in
(01:16:19):
the mail, pictures of their trash cans in front of
their house on a postcard with.
Speaker 5 (01:16:25):
Attention attention to you, disgusting pigs that live at this address.
Maybe you don't understand like how things work.
Speaker 1 (01:16:31):
But they yeah. And so here's here's something that I
don't do every day. I am. I am siding with
a homeowner's association. That is not that is not a
thing that I normally do, but I'm I'm doing it
in this situation. As woman in South Jersey, she is
(01:16:52):
beefing with her h o A over her chickens. I'm
sorry her emotional support chickensies. That's her. It's uh yeah,
it's gotten to the point where she's even lawyered. Up
here she is in the news with her lawyer telling
her side of the story.
Speaker 5 (01:17:08):
We received an email from the board saying that we
weren't allowed to have them, we weren't allowed to.
Speaker 11 (01:17:12):
Have our coop, and that we needed to get rid
of them immediately, and then they served us with a lawsuit.
Speaker 1 (01:17:17):
And we've been in court ever since. It's almost three
years now.
Speaker 13 (01:17:19):
During depositions, you know, opposing counsel was asking ask LORI,
do you kiss your chickens? And I mean, it's just
I think that kind of shows to your point that, yeah,
people aren't taking this seriously because it's chickens.
Speaker 1 (01:17:35):
It's cute, it's.
Speaker 13 (01:17:36):
A little funny, it's a little odd.
Speaker 1 (01:17:38):
No. And she, by the way, she saw a big
improvement in her PTSD symptoms after getting the chickens. The
overused word, right, I mean unless you were at war, Yeah,
if you were the military PTSD, I don't.
Speaker 3 (01:17:52):
Get how like I'm anti hwakeus, Like I don't if
I pay for my house.
Speaker 7 (01:17:57):
I don't want to be told what color I can
paint the.
Speaker 3 (01:17:59):
Door, but that I know I wouldn't be a good
fit for that neighborhood. Why is she in this neighborhood?
She's got to go.
Speaker 1 (01:18:05):
Okay, now here's the thing. I live in a neighborhood
with an hoa, and yes, they are a pain in
the ass about things that they shouldn't be a pain
in the ass about. However, we have that neighbor a
few houses down who has that giant pig. Yes, oh
right right, And the person who lives next door to
them drives them nuts because the thing will make these noises.
(01:18:26):
He looks out, he wakes up in the morning, says,
he opens up his bedroom blinds for the master bedroom.
I'm sorry, the primary bedroom break yes, and he looks outside.
He's like, oh, what a beautiful day. And then, you know,
kind of looks down and sees this giant pig. Where
the hell do I live? So, yeah, I'm gonna use
this as my I hate to break it to you
because I know it's very popular. Now. I hate to
(01:18:48):
break it to you, but if you have farm animals
in a suburban neighborhood, that's trashy. Yeah, like the neighbor
who's got the pig trashy? You got chickens, and you
don't live out in like a rural area, trashy backyard
chickens they have a name trash right, Yeah, okay, what
about duck trash? What about bees trashy? Yeah? Yeah, you're
(01:19:12):
like a keeper.
Speaker 9 (01:19:15):
My neighbor bees. He's a chef, so he makes his
own honey.
Speaker 5 (01:19:19):
So he gets they don't bother anybody. Bees like like
it's like a birdhouse, like a small version.
Speaker 1 (01:19:24):
Yeah, there's big boxes, like with these wooden boxes. So
there's no right or wrong answer. It's just my opinion.
You can't agree or disagree. That's fine. I'm sure I'm
going to agree or disagree with other ones that people have.
But I hate to break it to you, but if
you have farm animals in a suburban or city industr
you know, like urban suburban or urban neighborhood, that's trashy. Yeah,
(01:19:45):
but baby goats trashy, little babe.
Speaker 5 (01:19:49):
The problem with chickens is roosters because there's noise, and
chickens are not cute.
Speaker 8 (01:19:56):
What if it's a suburban area, but you have like
two acres.
Speaker 1 (01:20:01):
Uh, two acres because acres.
Speaker 12 (01:20:05):
Because I That's how I grew up, was I had
about two acres so to my neighbor.
Speaker 8 (01:20:09):
We weren't spread far apart like it went. It went
like further back.
Speaker 12 (01:20:13):
But it's mostly woods and stuff like that, right, but
you're still yeah, but you're still next to and he
had a bunch of chickens and turkeys and rabbits and
all the stuff.
Speaker 3 (01:20:23):
Sounds Yeah, you're not like you couldn't throw something from
one window to the other and catch it.
Speaker 1 (01:20:29):
If you have two acres, that's plenty of space. Yeah,
and that's not suburbs. Yeah, that's definitely more like a
massive lot. That is huge.
Speaker 12 (01:20:37):
Yeah, but again most of it isn't really usable. It
was still very much next door.
Speaker 1 (01:20:42):
You are still here two acres, yeah, just because but
I think I think suburbs are.
Speaker 5 (01:20:49):
Everybody are connected to each other more than a quarter
and a half, a like subdivisions.
Speaker 1 (01:20:55):
Yeah, right, what he lives in the suburbs.
Speaker 3 (01:20:57):
Correct, I haven't hated to shine. Yeah one pigs and.
Speaker 9 (01:21:02):
Your hate way door doesn't do anything about the people
that park in front of the mailboxes.
Speaker 1 (01:21:05):
Well that's oh no, yeah, they don't do a thing
about a lot of the stuff. But the stuff that
you know you would want them to do something about
They don't, right, they're gross. Yeah, all right, So I
hate to break it to you, but it doesn't have
to be something with neighbors or anything that. It could
be anything. I think one of the other ones I
mentioned before. I hate to break it to you, but
white people dreads are not for us. I've never seen
(01:21:27):
a cool looking white person with dreads. I go, wow,
that looks really good, and it looks looks terrible. He's
not saying this from any kind of culture appropriation thing.
It just looks bad. It looks dumb like white like
black dudes all day could pull off the dreads. It
looks great and.
Speaker 3 (01:21:42):
It smells bad because my college boyfriend had him and
had to put peanut butter in his hair to get dreads.
Speaker 5 (01:21:48):
That's That's the other thing too, is it's not often
it's a looks thing. It's a lifestyle things for her.
It is all right, So what's your I hate to
break it to you. Phones are open eight seven seven
forty four. Wood If you like to share, won't go
around the room. You can send us a text the
Woody Ship. I hate to break it to you, but
nobody looks good with the stupid lip injections. Even slight
(01:22:11):
ones look ridiculous. That's coming in from the two to
one three.
Speaker 1 (01:22:15):
Well, yeah, it made Kylie Jenner a billionaire. Oh yeah,
because a bunch of people are dumb. Yeah, and they're like, oh,
I'll look like none. Yeah, so I hate. I hate
to break it to you. Yeah, you definitely shouldn't be
able to tell. Yeah eight seven, seven forty four. What
if you want to call it with yours, send your
text over to two to ninety seven. We're gonna say
sea beast.
Speaker 5 (01:22:34):
Oh yeah, that's I've said before. That will be the
bell bottom jeans of this decade. Is these stupid fish lips,
because I see them all the time on women who
just don't need it.
Speaker 1 (01:22:43):
Yeah. Uh, let's see. I hate to break it to you,
but just because you have your blinker on doesn't mean
you get to go. That's true. Agree, It's like I
warned you, yeah, come and go.
Speaker 4 (01:22:54):
Yeah yeah, but yeah, so don't be a dick a
right yeah alsome no matter how hard I try to
go back, I hate to break it to you.
Speaker 1 (01:23:02):
But Jipotle's just mid man. It used to be all
about chiple.
Speaker 4 (01:23:09):
I I I come and go, and then I'm like,
I give it another chance, and I think like, oh,
it's gonna be good.
Speaker 1 (01:23:17):
It's just not it's just not good.
Speaker 20 (01:23:19):
Yeah, you try them out again, you try them Barbacoa
joins menos. I did, and then it's just like, nah,
why am I doing this? Why might keep on forcing myself?
There's other places some melancholy about it. Yeah, So mid let's.
Speaker 1 (01:23:36):
Go to Jimmy here on the phones eight seven seven
forty four wood. He is the phone number. Good morning, Jimmy,
good morning, good morning. All right. Hate to break it
to what do you got for us?
Speaker 11 (01:23:48):
I hate to break it to you. But if you
go out to check your mail and a bathrobe, tennis
shoes and pantyhose, I hate to break it to you
could just put on pants or sweatpants. Nobody wants to
see you. Old lady out in penty hose and a
bathrobe checking her.
Speaker 1 (01:24:02):
Mail sounds very specific. I see that like all the time.
Always this one person.
Speaker 11 (01:24:14):
Sees it.
Speaker 1 (01:24:15):
Okay, so there you have a neighbor who does this,
or your wife does it following Oh no, no, no, no, no,
no no.
Speaker 11 (01:24:21):
My wife is three ft eleven. She couldn't get away
with that. But well yeah, she she she, she sorts, Okay, yeah.
Speaker 16 (01:24:29):
All right, she can't.
Speaker 3 (01:24:31):
We all right, I got one that might be controversial,
and callers are never good.
Speaker 4 (01:24:41):
It's just like, well, my buck.
Speaker 5 (01:24:45):
Is full of uranium, I must drink it.
Speaker 1 (01:24:49):
All right, let's move on.
Speaker 7 (01:24:50):
I got one.
Speaker 3 (01:24:52):
If you belittle a waiter, you deserve whatever they do
to your food.
Speaker 11 (01:24:58):
In it.
Speaker 1 (01:24:58):
I don't care.
Speaker 7 (01:24:59):
Put put some mirror allergic to doing it whatever.
Speaker 3 (01:25:01):
I am so sick of people trying to like impress
their date or impress their friends by being rude to
wait staff.
Speaker 7 (01:25:07):
I can't take it people.
Speaker 1 (01:25:10):
Yeah, let me impress you know who it always is.
Speaker 3 (01:25:16):
It's always somebody's friend who's dating a new guy, and
the guys like acting like a total.
Speaker 1 (01:25:23):
Just a tool jay off. Yeah, and like what's wrong
with you?
Speaker 7 (01:25:26):
And what's wrong with her for picking it? Like is
that how you impress her friends? So I don't care
what they do to your food at that point.
Speaker 1 (01:25:32):
Also, yeah, my son tells me a lot of stories.
He works at an amusement park and he works in foods.
They have him at the different you know, they move
them around the different areas of the the one place
was it's it everywhere problem. Yeah, you know, and they're
they're getting really pissed at this fifteen year old kid
who just took the order. I hate that he didn't
(01:25:52):
have anything to do with preparing the food. He doesn't
have anything to do with how long it's going to
take before it comes out. And he tells us some
of the stuff. These people just walk up and say
to him and freaking out and throwing things.
Speaker 8 (01:26:04):
And throwing things.
Speaker 1 (01:26:06):
Yeah, that's a huge trend. Yeah, they'll take something just
kind of throw it back behind the counter. That's what
I'm talking about. The little tantrum.
Speaker 3 (01:26:13):
All the people that are like going insane on like
fast food workers and stuff.
Speaker 7 (01:26:17):
I don't care what they do to your food at
that point.
Speaker 1 (01:26:20):
Yeah, And Gregor, are you saying that people have enough
stuff because you want everybody to park in their garage
and stop storing stuff. That's a good side.
Speaker 9 (01:26:28):
I hate to it, but if the tech you have
a garage and you don't park in it, you have
a mental disorder.
Speaker 1 (01:26:33):
Sea Bass.
Speaker 5 (01:26:34):
Hate to break it to you that mine is going
to be very much similar to Greg's because I just
saw this this week. Hate to break it to you.
But if you own a designer brand T shirt anything
with the logo of the company on it, and you
think that's fancy, it's doing the exact opposite. It's showing
you that you are a trashy moron. Because I busted
a guy doing Carton narks and he walks out of
(01:26:54):
his you know, Mercedes whatever wagon, which looks hideous. By
the way, he's wearing something men as you might know this.
It's ball mom Parie b A l m A I
ball main, I guess, And it's just it's just ball
Paris on a black T shirt. I looked at because
people started commenting on, oh my god, he's got a
blah blah.
Speaker 1 (01:27:10):
Blah now that medic can pronounce. By the way, Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 5 (01:27:13):
Five hundred and fifty dollars Ray T shirt that just
says the bread And every time I see a Gucci
T shirt or those are so or this dude, Well,
you go to certain parts of Vegas and all the
trashy foreigners wear him. You look like a moron, and
you're doing the exact opposite of what you're trying to accomplish,
which is to look cool and swapping exactly you think
(01:27:33):
you're flexing and.
Speaker 1 (01:27:35):
Called quiet luxury. Look into it.
Speaker 5 (01:27:37):
It's called conscious consumer, conspicuous consumption, I should say. And
it's very much like what Greg just said, like stop
falling for the new themed Trader Joe's bag.
Speaker 1 (01:27:48):
Bag soon and then you're gonna say, oh my god,
it's cute. I need stop just buying things to buy
things menace what I haven't bought anything lately?
Speaker 5 (01:27:58):
Oh really, mister, I need size ten and a half
Easies black color.
Speaker 1 (01:28:02):
Years ago.
Speaker 5 (01:28:07):
Half size. But it's a new thing every year. It's
this and that and that.
Speaker 1 (01:28:13):
Stop it, everyone, stop it only by my things, see.
And I feel like it's therapeutic for a lot of
people to finally say, because you sit there and you
bite your tongue, you're like, you know what, whatever neighbors
got the pig? Your life so trashy farm animals in
the suburbs. Here's a text message seven one four. I
hate to break it to you, but just because you
(01:28:34):
work out doesn't make you an influencer.
Speaker 5 (01:28:37):
Yes, if you're if you're filming yourself in the gym
at all, you should be kick You should lose your membership,
you should be kicked out because what you're doing is
number one, you're probably not doing the exercicks correctly. And
number two, no one cares about you doing six have
bad squats.
Speaker 9 (01:28:52):
And you know, what's the equivalent of posting yourself brushing
your teeth. It's just maintenance of your body.
Speaker 1 (01:28:58):
It's the version of it cares.
Speaker 5 (01:28:59):
It's the version of taken a photo of every meali
you eat. You're doing very mediocre, as menace will say
mid workouts and you have to video that.
Speaker 1 (01:29:07):
Why which, Greg, thank you for reminding me my body
is due for its maintenance. Bringing it from me, Yes, maintain.
I hate to break it to you, but not everyone
wants to be married with kids. It's not an accomplishment,
it's a.
Speaker 5 (01:29:21):
Choice's not a popular thing anymore. Quite frankly, I hate
to break it to you, but women cheat more than
men do. From the nine to seven to two. True,
I think they cheat just as much.
Speaker 1 (01:29:34):
I don't ever buy that whole thing about well when
it comes to stuff like that sex, you know, I
think it's it's a human thing. It's a desire thing.
Women may not vocalize it as much, but you can't
tell me they're not thinking about it, because so the
only thing about when they get around their girlfriends or
they're reading cause because that's what everything in those magazines
(01:29:56):
for that are aimed at chicks is about. Yeah, it's
all the articles about ten ways to make him, you know,
curl his toes. Yeah, it's like all that's what all
those articles and stuff about when you see those those
women's magazines, So you can't maybe they just don't talk
about it as well. Gross is like maybe the guys
will or.
Speaker 5 (01:30:13):
The numbers say that men are it's like four or
five times as many. Yeah, because just think about it.
Bio Biologically, the risk for a man for cheating is
way less than the risk for a woman for cheating.
Speaker 3 (01:30:22):
Well, and also Greg loves this word, so I'm going
to say it. It's all about the biological desire to
spread your seat exactly.
Speaker 1 (01:30:27):
Yeah, but who has the better opportunity be women? Hate seed?
Speaker 11 (01:30:31):
Seed?
Speaker 5 (01:30:32):
Of course women have the As we said, any woman
who's not disgusting can walk outside and have sex in
ten minutes.
Speaker 1 (01:30:38):
We also see people online who are in relationships and
they're disgusting, so.
Speaker 5 (01:30:41):
They're But the point being is that women just don't
want to as much again because it's the cost is
so much higher for them if things go on.
Speaker 4 (01:30:47):
Yeah, there ain't no lady Genghis Collins out there.
Speaker 1 (01:30:50):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 9 (01:30:51):
Well, I think we can all agree. Though I hate
to break it to you. Women are sloppier than men.
Speaker 3 (01:30:56):
Oh, I think there's so much except for Sammy who.
Speaker 1 (01:30:59):
Blows out the curve.
Speaker 8 (01:31:00):
Yeah, I don't think that I am.
Speaker 1 (01:31:02):
She's ironing sheet little bit. Yeah, I just don't have
a lot of space here. Your desk is kind of
a catch off for the whole Oh my.
Speaker 8 (01:31:10):
God, that desk. Yeah, I just ignore it and got
my backpack there in the morning.
Speaker 7 (01:31:13):
But I don't she doesn't claim that space.
Speaker 1 (01:31:15):
No, look at a car by women's bedroom, woman's bathroom. So,
by the way, Greg, she does. She does not keep
her piles organized on her desk. That's she throws them willingly. Yeah.
Nine five one. I hate to break it to you,
but you're a pos. When you're done with your snacks
and your drinks in a movie, and when the movie's over,
you get up and everything on your lap from your
drinks in the popcorn and the wrappers and everything just
(01:31:37):
fall on the ground. You walk away like nothing happens.
Speaker 5 (01:31:39):
Yes, people have advocated this as a cart Andark spin off,
and there's there's some pushback on this because they give
the excuse.
Speaker 1 (01:31:46):
Well, they pay people to clean up. Yeah, but they
also they have a trash can at the entrance, and
you know what it's there for, right, we paid firemen
to put out fires, So let's just set fires. Yeah,
if it's like a kernel of corn or you know,
like just like some random kind of like a little
piece of the corner of the wrapping from the candy
that you had and you couldn't see it in the dark,
I get it. But like when you're leaving the big
popcorn bucket there and all the cups and drink on
(01:32:07):
the floor.
Speaker 3 (01:32:07):
Yeah, yeah, we somebody was sitting in our ticket in
our seats when we went to a baseball game, and
really they were and left mountains of trash that we
then had to sit in.
Speaker 7 (01:32:18):
Like those people are those people are animals.
Speaker 1 (01:32:20):
Agreed, Agreed, Thank you. I hate to break it to you,
but joining MENSA doesn't make you better than anyone that's
from the eight one to eight my definition.
Speaker 5 (01:32:27):
It does literally the definition of smarter.
Speaker 1 (01:32:34):
It's coming up Hand.
Speaker 10 (01:32:39):
Show.
Speaker 1 (01:32:40):
We'll be right back the Woody Show. Hi, welcome back.
A couple of follow ups to hate to break it
to you, and yeah, by the way, on the MENSA thing,
the person sending, uh, just because you have you know
you're in MENSA whatever I forget exactly said, it's basically
(01:33:00):
just because you maybe you're a better person anybody. And
uh this one says Sea Best's claim to being a
member of MENSA the equivalent of Al Bundy's three touchdowns
in one game from pol Kai Neat story, but has
absolutely no substance or relevance to your adult life and occupation.
I think anybody here can answer to that one.
Speaker 5 (01:33:20):
Because the person whose job it is to like analyze
things talk about stuff fa your situations out.
Speaker 1 (01:33:24):
So being smart doesn't help with that, okay, right, three
two three. I hate to break it to you, but
just because you lift heavy weights of the gym doesn't
mean you can kick anybody's ass.
Speaker 5 (01:33:32):
That's true, but it does give you it's it's it's
uh one of the power.
Speaker 1 (01:33:36):
Yeah, it's it's you. You you stay out of fights
by being big. I hate to break it to you,
but the boo boo dolls are ugly and a waste
of money. Go all in on. Yeah, you know the
stocks are down. Time to invest. Yeah, let's let's just
go straight thet boo boo. Yeah. All right, So I
(01:33:56):
have this, uh, I have this story here and I
want to fun mind because I do. I do have
a clip that goes along with it. Here. So this
is the second time this year has happened. But there's
a story about a little kid getting into his grandfather's
ashes and eating them. What the most recent one, and
there is video of the aftermath. This kid had opened
(01:34:17):
the urn and got ashes everywhere, I mean all over everything,
all over himself. It was around his mouth. You know
when you see a kid, you're like, what have you
been eating? Like to have cheeto dust all over? Like
he didn't open it up with a spoon, but he
certainly did consume some of it. Oh, he got into
the Yeah. So here's here's the clip. This is the mom.
The mom was mortified, as you can imagine. Here.
Speaker 5 (01:34:41):
Some washing.
Speaker 1 (01:34:43):
Later, I've had to mention fun with an accent, fun accent,
fun accent.
Speaker 8 (01:34:46):
Sorry, some washing a few minutes later, and he had
held over his mouth.
Speaker 1 (01:34:54):
I was in complete shock.
Speaker 14 (01:34:55):
Oh my god, when you soon eat she died as
my son Hussey and my dad's.
Speaker 1 (01:35:02):
Lash, dude, Greg, did you catch what she said?
Speaker 5 (01:35:10):
When your son eats your dad's ashes? People are starting
to talk like TikTok video. She said, what about then
she's showing, She's showing the aftermath.
Speaker 1 (01:35:20):
And this has been because I think there's a visual reference,
because that this is basically this is what happens.
Speaker 5 (01:35:25):
The sentence would be my son ate my dad's ashes
exactly when. But there's visuals stuff. I don't understand how
you don't get those beams.
Speaker 1 (01:35:35):
People are now speaking like captions on social media. But
what he was making the she was showing it the
ashes all over the place, I mean because it is
all over the couch, it's all over the floor. You
see the urn tipped over, and it's just it's everywhere everywhere.
So I think it gives it to the context that
it needs to. I don't know what she should have said,
(01:35:55):
po V when your son, she says, uh, she doesn't
think he ate that much, that he just like maybe
tasted it, spat it out and just played with it.
But I was with him forever. Yeah, a couple He's
gonna crap Grandpa. A couple of months ago, there was
(01:36:16):
another story where another toddler had emptied out a makeshift earn.
And you know, by the way, everyone's got a cute
name for their grandparents, it was his peapaw's ashes. Yeah.
The mom vacuumed the mess up before she realized what
the dust was, and then realized that the kid may
have eaten some of that too tasting.
Speaker 9 (01:36:34):
Grandpa kids are gross. If I was a grandpa, I
would say, you are not calling me pipa. Yeah, yeah,
that's a dumb one. I don't I don't like that one.
Speaker 1 (01:36:43):
Would you call it? But you had names for your
grandparents like the Russian uh yeah, baba and ja okay,
but you don't like peapa, but grandma and grandpa exactly.
And then AmAm on apa pa that's estonia. M okay,
that makes more sense. Why did you just say grandpa great?
Because Greg, you can pay rules grandma. That's weird. We
(01:37:08):
got more Woody Show coming
Speaker 12 (01:37:09):
Up, hanging hey, if you feel like you could be
a swast China Woody Show
Due to the graphic nature of this program. Listener discretion
is advise.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
The Woody Show.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
This is the Woody Show. Insensitivity Training class is now
in session. A good morning, everybody. Today is Friday. It's
(00:49):
August twenty ninth, twenty twenty five. Hello and welcome. We
are the Woody Show. I'm whatdding that's great gory. We
got Menace, we got Gina Grant seabasses here, we got
Sammy Morgan, our social producer von, our video producer Bort
and Menji in the Who's thank you for being here
giving us some of your valuable time this morning. If
(01:12):
you want to give us any feedback on the show,
of course eight seven seven forty four Woodie, you do that,
find us follow us on social media at the Woody
Show coming up for you. On the show this morning,
we got, of course the fail stories and the dyq,
but also some Friday Dad jokes. Morgan gets to be
a whore for money, yeah, because that's what she likes
(01:35):
to do. What else she likes to earn extra money
on the side, and also a round of I hate
to break it to you, but and so it's one
of those you get to fill in the blank. Oh,
what do they say the heart of the truth, to
tell the heart the truth of the trend that tells it. Yeah,
I from you. So that is coming up for you
this morning here on the show, getting started with some
fact or bs. Your job is to determine is it
(01:59):
a fact or is it something just completely made up?
But some of these are they sound like they should
be bs. So it's it's tougher than you might think.
And uh yeah, so we've we've got some of those
for you that we're gonna have. So just you're gonna
go what just through.
Speaker 3 (02:15):
I can go through as many as you want. I
got yea infinite and you tell me because yeah, these
are these are crazy and not so crazy?
Speaker 1 (02:23):
Who knows? Okay, I'm really curious how Sea Bass is
going to do it, because I'm very smart. He likes
he likes to, uh yeah, even stuff he won't believe
a fire that he's standing in front of that's singing
the eyebrows off of his face. Your source, I'm not.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
Sure, So feel free to to keep score on your
own and see how many of you guts.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
All right, all right, all right, so the first one
for tell a lie to effects it sounds like bs.
Are they?
Speaker 3 (02:50):
Though Shakespeare invented the word banana while writing the play
The Tempest.
Speaker 4 (02:58):
I know he invented a lot of words, but was
it in reference to a banana?
Speaker 3 (03:02):
And I'm not going to do any like fake out
stuff like it was to just kidding. It was nine
and a half, like it's right around.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
I was thinking like maybe he invented he was the
first person to use the word banana, and then it
was later assigned to the fruit. I mean bananas, how
long they've been around? For a long time. It's been around,
it's been around. I'm gonna say that is sounds weird.
I'm gonna say true.
Speaker 5 (03:23):
I'm gonna say true as well. True's false? Say the
Shakespeare things are red a red herring?
Speaker 6 (03:28):
Oh false, Greg Sea bass I made it up?
Speaker 1 (03:37):
All right, all right? How long have been there? It's
been around long after long Behavian word organ.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
And did you know there's like fifty or probably more
varieties of banana?
Speaker 1 (03:47):
Oh yeah, there was once. That's fake. Oh you need
to make it okay? Oh no, no, no, that's my favorite.
Speaker 4 (03:53):
Bananas are these little tiny bananas that you can get
uh in Maui on your waists, on your way to
seven sacred pools. No, the blue ones, the ones that
allegedly taste like vanilla ice cream, I've never had them.
Speaker 1 (04:06):
I want that.
Speaker 7 (04:06):
I found a bunch of little bananas are adorable.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
Wild bananas originated in Southeast Asia Malaysia, Indonesia, and the
Philippines modern day around seven ten thousand years ago. Damn,
and not like the ones that we eat today. They
were filled with large, hard seeds that were not very sweet. Yum,
y okay. Freed them joints. Well, let's talk about this.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
Chainsaws were first invented for childbirth.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
I'm gonna say true, true false.
Speaker 4 (04:36):
I wanted to be false so bad.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
Because I thought it was unless I am misremembering, which
is all the time. Wasn't an invented for surgery for
amputations and things like that? They used it for bone surgeries.
I mean makes sense. I feel like I heard they
get quick. Yeah, all right, I'm gonna say false. Not
for childbirth, but for medical purposes. I'll say true. I'm
(05:02):
sure it was something medical, and why not be an
umbilical cord. I'm confident it's true. It's also confident for
an umbilical cord.
Speaker 3 (05:09):
According to Cosmopolitan, where I got all the facts.
Speaker 7 (05:13):
Quote unquote, it is true.
Speaker 3 (05:15):
They were developed in Scotland in the late eighteenth century
to help speed up the process of widening the pubic
area and the removal of disease laden bones.
Speaker 1 (05:27):
With a chainsaw came in exactly.
Speaker 8 (05:30):
I actually learned in that and a meme last week.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
That's funny.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
Yeah, women don't feel paind bust out the hack saw.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
All right, let's keep going.
Speaker 3 (05:39):
It is illegal to own just one guinea pig in Switzerland.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
Ah.
Speaker 4 (05:46):
I would say true, because yeah, there's a lot of
you know, countries that just don't allow certain animals.
Speaker 8 (05:53):
I think they're like pack animals.
Speaker 7 (05:55):
They're not saying they don't allow them.
Speaker 8 (05:57):
You can't you need to have at least too, like
you can't us have one.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
He needs a friend. Oh really, Art, Yeah, I will
say true. I say false. Then that's so strange. I'm
gonna say true because they they want to do population control.
Speaker 3 (06:15):
No, it's true, because it's considered animal abuse because they're
social beings, they get lonely.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
That's what Bort's been saying. That was that one was
for Bort Sam. He's been saying. That's what Bort's been saying,
all right, moving right along.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Competitive art used to be yep, competitive art used to
be an Olympic sport.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
Competitive arts art is an Olympic sports.
Speaker 7 (06:36):
Olympic sport.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
Yeah, there used to be a lot of dumb sports
back then. No, because I think it's so. I guess
judges' scores are arbitrary, but they're usually based on some
type of technical element and the execution. There, I'm gonna
say false. I think I want to say true, but
just for odds of we just had two trees in
our row. Okay, so that's your reason. Yeah, that's why not.
(07:01):
It's a super game. Okay, all right. False.
Speaker 7 (07:04):
As insane as it sounds, it's true.
Speaker 3 (07:07):
Between nineteen twelve and nineteen forty eight, the Olympics awarded
medals for music, painting, sculpture and architecture.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
Allegedly, God, just when you thought I couldn't get any dumber,
now it's break dancing. Yeah. Right, by the way, Greg's
mom texted me again, yeah uh and sent me another
one of your oh no show us please hold on,
And this one I'm like, I'm like, Greg did that? Yeah?
(07:37):
Greg beautiful?
Speaker 5 (07:38):
I hate you call it your mom. Angle of a
clearing in a marsh looks like it.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
Looks like dream or something. Bob Ross w.
Speaker 5 (07:53):
Ross where you're hiding in a duck blind school says,
here's anothergory masterpiece.
Speaker 7 (08:02):
You're very talented.
Speaker 1 (08:03):
Have a wonderful week regards. So anyway, I was like, hey,
great to hear from you. It's an amazing piece of arts.
Should really be behind glass. The activists don't throw soup on it,
you know. I hope you guys are holding up. Wife
and I are thinking of you often, and they go,
we're hanging in there. We think of you both with
fond recollections. I'm like, this is where, this is where, yeah,
(08:29):
stay well hydrated and happy. Yeah, like that is so Greg's.
Speaker 9 (08:34):
Parents recollections so sweet. Yes, that's sweet. Ye already. I
hope that that's the end of it. I think that's
all the paintings.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
She's going to bring stuff up out of the Out
of the Vault. Dude released just Today's Tell a Lie
Day and Gena's reading some facts. It sound like they
could be complete bs, but some of them are actually true.
Had a lot of true ones I didn't believe.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
But yeah, cats per at a frequency that can recharge
small electronic devices like watches.
Speaker 1 (09:14):
Say it again, cats per.
Speaker 3 (09:16):
At a frequency that can recharge small electronic devices like watches.
Speaker 1 (09:21):
It's got to be sounds like some dumb thing that
cat lovers like like to believe that. They would love
to believe that they have, like some kind of crazy
reg Yeah. Yeah, they're not just dumb cats.
Speaker 9 (09:31):
They're the only thing I know about cats is that
every type of cat, lion, house cat, anything, they all
purr at the same beats.
Speaker 1 (09:40):
I believe that. But you thought that all domestic house
cats were female for the longest time up until he
was like forty some years old. Well, they're so girly
yeline females exactly.
Speaker 5 (09:53):
If human watches can charge by human movement, why couldn't
an audible Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
I believe it charged by human movement because you're there's
something inside that it causes it to move, because your
arm or whatever's maybe that's cats. Yeah, vocal vibration, larynx
or whatever it is. I believe it can do it.
I think false false.
Speaker 10 (10:13):
Uh.
Speaker 7 (10:14):
As much as I would love this as a cat lover, it's.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Fakes, all right, right, and give us one more.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
Okay, let's make it a real good one. The last
letter added to the English alphabet was J.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Everybody knows it's z.
Speaker 10 (10:37):
Z.
Speaker 1 (10:38):
No.
Speaker 4 (10:40):
That's a good question, Jay, that has to be false
because it wasn't like Jehovah or something. He's that was Wait,
where's this going?
Speaker 1 (10:50):
No, it is in like in the Bible and stuff.
That's a good point.
Speaker 9 (10:54):
But we learned in Indiana, Jones, that Jehovah starts.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
With the I. I mean, Greg, God, I mean Indiana. Ill.
There's no like biblical person that starts with the J. Joseph, Yeah, Jake, that's.
Speaker 7 (11:10):
Right, Yeah, yeah, job yeah, g like an terested development.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
I'm saying false.
Speaker 9 (11:16):
Okay, I'll say that's so weird. I'm gonna say yes,
language speak in the Bible.
Speaker 8 (11:21):
I'll say true as well, because it would be like Greig,
because it's so weird.
Speaker 1 (11:24):
Agree, true, Okay, so random? Why j Yeah? True?
Speaker 3 (11:29):
And Greg, you guys really should listen to his pop
culture trivia. The letter dates back to fifteen twenty four.
Speaker 6 (11:35):
Before that, the letter I was used for I and
Jay there.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
So smart and a great artist. Yeah he learned a lot.
Well there you go. There's some facts are crap. Yeah,
well my day. Thank you. Gina, you're welcome, call me
a good fun fact. We're gonna take a quick break
more what he shows next hand show. Yeah, Greg was
sharing with us how he finally came around. He was
(12:04):
late to the party on Nathan and Nathan Fielder. Nathan Fielder,
he's a genius. Yeah, he likes he likes that show. Yeah.
Speaker 9 (12:11):
I just watched when I admitted that that he's a
brand new thing. Yeah, oh yeah, yeah, I didn't play
it out. I think it was twelve years late, fifty
eight times.
Speaker 1 (12:21):
Well, in the spirit of what you're watching, I just
watched this program about Beaver's dude, best damn program I've
ever seen time for the dad jokes. Everybody's before Woody.
That's because he hasn't caught his breath yet.
Speaker 7 (12:38):
Doubled over.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
Yeah, seven seven forty four Woody text over to two
to nine eight seven dad jokes, fun, simple, punny. You
know all this stuff Callvin punks man.
Speaker 5 (12:51):
You get so caught up on semantics, right, But people
rein betting the wheel every four years.
Speaker 1 (12:56):
Yeah, isn't that. I mean, that's gotta be something to
look into people like. It's not I can see it.
Word Maybe it's like one word or one phrase, but
it's almost all of them. I agree. Yeah, so that's
got to be like some there's got to be something
to that.
Speaker 5 (13:09):
Yeah, right, is there a compulsion like standard something about maybe?
Speaker 1 (13:14):
I don't know dad jokes? Eight seven seven forty four.
What are let's say hi to Scott? Hey, good morning, Scott?
How are you, Scotty? Good morning? Are you guys? We're
doing fantastic? What's your dad joke? What do you call
a pile of kittens? What do you call a pile
of kittens? What a mountain? Horrible? Get it great because
(13:38):
it's kittens?
Speaker 11 (13:38):
Thank you?
Speaker 1 (13:40):
Wat seven seven forty four. What he texts over to
two to two nine eighty seven. Do you know what
Jeff Bezos does before bedwooting? What he puts his Amazon?
Speaker 12 (13:50):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (13:51):
I'm getting what Amazon? He puts his Amazon Amazon?
Speaker 3 (14:00):
You guys know how you follow Will Smith in the snow?
You just follow the fresh print like wow.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
Let's go to Candace re response, Good morning, Candace, good morning,
good morning?
Speaker 13 (14:14):
All right?
Speaker 1 (14:14):
What's your what's your dad joke?
Speaker 11 (14:16):
So?
Speaker 1 (14:17):
What do you get when you mix an elephant and
a rhinoceros? What do you get when you mix an
elephant and a rhinoceros. What I gotta get in all right, Kennis,
Thank you for the call. Appreciate you listening to the
Woody Show. Yes, Menace, did you hear about the girl
that ate a frog? I didn't.
Speaker 4 (14:37):
They say that she might croak frog getting nassy mess?
But the look on your face either or sucking on
a lemon? Or you didn't like that dad joke that
Menace had.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Do you have a better one? I've got a different
category blonde jokes, these old gems. Yeah, it's good.
Speaker 5 (14:53):
What do what do you call a blonde standing on
her head? What a brunette with bad breath?
Speaker 1 (15:00):
Joke? First of all, Box of the eighties right there
with the yo mama jokes? Yeah jokes. Yeah, Well was
the other blonde one? I? Oh yeah, uh? How did
the blonde drown? Scratching stiff sticker on the scratching sniff
(15:20):
sticker on the bottom of the bath toob? Yeah? What
sound does a witch's car make? Greg a witch's car?
What broom? Broom? Come on, come on, come on, let's
go to Johnny. Good morning, Johnny, Hey, good morning.
Speaker 11 (15:41):
I got a knock knock joke for you.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
Well, you won't stick with dag jokes. But yeah, Johnny,
that's you. Who's there dishes? His dish is Sean Connery.
Work's the way nails. They say that they have been comedy.
(16:06):
Timing is everything. I think it was the disjointed nature
of that that made it. I mean it was that
was amazing. Well either way, it's a good dad joke,
but the work of art. Yeah. Uh, there was a
break into guys at the wig factory, you know. Yeah,
the cops they're combing the air.
Speaker 11 (16:23):
In man.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
They called to clean the ocean? Who mermaids? The position
sixty nine will now be ninety six due to the tariffs,
So the cost of eating out has gone up.
Speaker 9 (16:37):
Yeah, I like that.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
That's on the text. Thank you nine o nine. Uh,
Matt has got another good one for us. Uh.
Speaker 4 (16:48):
Why did the car take a nap? Why it was tired?
I have one from Matic.
Speaker 1 (16:55):
It's a thinker day.
Speaker 9 (16:55):
Yeah, we know dogs can't operate an MRI test, but
cat scan let's say.
Speaker 1 (17:02):
Uh, Daryl, good morning, Daryl, good morning show. Now Darryl,
we're counting on you to bring the heat. Dude. Why
is the chicken not one across the road? Why do
the chicken not one across the road, Darryl, because there
were a chicken rafts on over there. Oh my god, yeah,
(17:23):
I support though. All right, let's go to uh, let's
go to Maverick. Hey, good morning, Maverick. Hey morning, all right,
thank you for bringing that Friday energy. What's your dad joke? Yeah?
Speaker 11 (17:36):
What do you give when you cross a mule with
an onion?
Speaker 1 (17:39):
What do you give when you cross a mule with
an onion? What a piece of ass? That'll bring it
here to your hell? All right, Maverick, thank you for
the call. Appreciate you. Listen, let's see it's gonna crush.
Let's see how to Jose? Good morning, Jose Yo?
Speaker 14 (17:59):
What up?
Speaker 1 (17:59):
Guys? What's your what's your dad joke? What is long green?
And smells like bacons? Long green? I think I know
long green? It smells like bacon?
Speaker 11 (18:10):
What finger? Hey?
Speaker 3 (18:15):
What what do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have
in common?
Speaker 1 (18:18):
What's that?
Speaker 15 (18:19):
They're both Paris sites. It's from the text. So why
did the blind man fall down the well? Well he
couldn't see that well?
Speaker 1 (18:30):
No, yeah, have you seen the news about the new
theatrical performance of puns? No, it's a great play on words. Jake,
Thank you. I did like that, Gina. Have you ever
had Ethiopian food? Yeah, it's coming, but it's great.
Speaker 4 (18:55):
Another great eighties joke. I love it, I got I
don't want to anymore. Yeah, I got one for seeing me.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Okay.
Speaker 4 (19:02):
Why do sweaters tend to hang out together?
Speaker 10 (19:05):
Why?
Speaker 1 (19:06):
Because they're pretty close knit? Today hitting jokes said, we haven't.
We haven't had really much from you.
Speaker 8 (19:13):
What do you call two monkeys that share an Amazon account?
Speaker 1 (19:15):
What?
Speaker 8 (19:16):
Prime mate?
Speaker 1 (19:18):
Horrible? Got it? You didn't break your Amazon jokes? All right,
they're very.
Speaker 5 (19:25):
What's the difference between blonde and brunette? What Sammy's forehead.
Speaker 1 (19:31):
Getting getting? Because on top of the e.
Speaker 16 (19:37):
I've been like that my whole life.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
But let's go to Let's go to Kristin. Hey, good morning, Kristin. Hello,
what's your dad joke?
Speaker 17 (19:47):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (19:47):
Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where
do you find a dog with no legs? Right where
you left it?
Speaker 16 (19:54):
Get okay?
Speaker 1 (19:56):
Because it's got no legs? Are you going to go? Everybody? Say? Hid?
To mic Mike? What's your dad joke? So?
Speaker 9 (20:05):
Where do pirates by their hooks at?
Speaker 1 (20:08):
Where do pirates buy their hooks at? Where the second
hand store. Yes, yes, they do, all right, Sea bass Sammy, Yes,
now there's that. Thanks for that clip. What does I
d K stand for?
Speaker 16 (20:27):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (20:27):
Oh my god, nobody does. There's you Dad jokes, everybody,
Woody shop and we are into another new hour. My
(20:48):
name is Woody. That is Greg Goringhi, Menace is here.
There's Sea Baske. Good morning to you. There's uh Morgan.
Sammy's here. Phone are open eight seven seven forty four, Woody.
That's eight seven seven forty four Wooding. You can send
us a text over to to nine eight seven. There's
(21:12):
this broad in Pennsylvania who was doing this thing where
she would make a bunch of hotel reservations and then
cancel them at the last minute. And she did this
hundreds of times, and I mean like four hundred times.
According to the report, he was ridicted, and even though
she was warned, hey, knock it off, she kept doing it.
(21:32):
And since the hotel's no show fee was only a
small cut of the full price, they lost a ton
of money. So back in January, one of the hotels
noticed forty four different reservations tied to this one credit
card just in that month, and she was using names
of local officials for some of these fake bookings, including
some of that had already died. She was arrested, charged
(21:54):
with theft and unlawful use of a computer, and as
part of her bail, she's banned from making hotel reservations
within two hundred miles where she lives. Oh my god,
that's about right, bitch, be tripping. Let's see.
Speaker 3 (22:07):
Best loves to say some sort of hack like can
you make them, then you cancel them, then you get
them for free, or you get.
Speaker 5 (22:13):
With airline tickets, like if you if you don't want
a middle seat, we can do as you buy all
the seats, all the middle seats, but then you cancel that, yes,
and then make your other reservation.
Speaker 11 (22:22):
You know.
Speaker 5 (22:22):
Yeah, but this is just not This sounds like a
crank with an axe grind.
Speaker 11 (22:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
Well, if you see a picture of her, you'll see
if you see a picture of her, we did like
one of those first impression deals. Yeah, yeah, tell me
how this person ended up in jail or how they
ended up getting arrest you'd be like, oh, makes sense, yeah, okay, Yeah,
she looks like somebody who have a cracker barrel, like
frequent diner card sitting a lot, and he buys all
(22:48):
their home decre from the cracker barrel, every sixty year
old woman in the South. Yeah, did you you pulled
the picture?
Speaker 16 (22:56):
Okay, Yeah, that's very accurate.
Speaker 1 (23:00):
With glasses, like a sixty year old thumb with glasses.
That's actually a pretty good descriptor looks just like that.
Most her endgame built like a nose tech. I don't
understand how that really worked. Well, I think I think
it's a crank. Yeah, it's somebody. She probably had a
beef with the hotel and she's also fixed the hotel
industry and I.
Speaker 7 (23:20):
Got nothing but time.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
Oh my guess.
Speaker 7 (23:23):
Yeah, she definitely has bodies under her floorboards.
Speaker 1 (23:25):
Yeah. I here's another bitch be tripping story, this time
about this woman who managed to pull off a disability
scam that lasted for sixteen years.
Speaker 7 (23:35):
Damn.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
She claims she was mute and as a result of
a traumatic incident at work, and she was collecting this
disability pension for more than a decade. She got busted
when they did a routine review of her case and
noticed that none of her doctors had mentioned anything about
her being unable to speak, so that raised a red flag.
The insurance company hired a private investigator, which my buddy does.
(23:59):
This guy used to work with in radio. All most
people around and stuff. I told you about that guy, right, yea, yeah,
he listens to the shows. He lives in Portland, Oregon,
and a lot of times he's sitting outside of some place,
like waiting for somebody or just keeping an eye on somebody,
and he listens to the show alive. But so much downtime,
so much downtime. He loves it. Last time I talked
(24:20):
about it, he loves it. I would bust people left
and right, and he gets hired for stuff like this. Anyway.
Sure enough, she was out in about living a pretty
non mute life. She was chatting it up with other
moms at the school pickup, she was talking on her phone,
going to workout classes, totally normal stuff, and so just
to be sure, the private investigator approached her one day
on the street asked for directions, and she gave it
(24:43):
very full, very clear, very vocal answer, not realizing that
she was being recorded, and that's how she got busted.
So her lawyer tried to get the recording thrown out
as evidence, but the court told her to suck it.
So not only is she off the payroll, the insurance
company is suing her to get back to sixteen years
(25:04):
worth of money.
Speaker 7 (25:04):
Yeah, what's the backpay on that? What's the total?
Speaker 1 (25:07):
I mean, I don't know, I'll know what she was doing.
Speaker 4 (25:08):
The money, I say to have. My favorite one was
that lady that said that she could barely walk and
her back was all messed up. And then she was
in the newspaper for the Christmas tree toss.
Speaker 1 (25:18):
Oh that shit, that's right. She's like, what I forgot
about that? Eight seven seven forty four Wood send us
a text over to two two nine eight seven. Charlie
Sheen's twenty one year old daughter, Sammy has become a
very popular OnlyFans model, as we've talked about before for her.
But where does she draw the line, Morgan, we've talked
(25:39):
about your only fans.
Speaker 16 (25:40):
Yeah, she has.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
Things she won't do. No sex, no full nudity speaking,
she says, quote, keep it very classy while still giving
people their money's worth.
Speaker 16 (25:53):
Yeah, is it not naked.
Speaker 1 (25:55):
But the list of things that she will do includes
foot stuff nice, which is the area.
Speaker 5 (26:01):
Which is the area that you're considering, Yes, dabbling in
put it put a toe in exactly.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
She says that her followers have requested weird things like
dipping my foot in the toilet. Done. I'll do it
right now. Yeah, do it for a dollar? She says
that dollar really to one dollar. Yeah, you'll dip your
foot in the toilet for a dollar?
Speaker 16 (26:23):
Yeah, like a clean toilet bowl?
Speaker 1 (26:25):
Or is there have to be at the radio station? Yeah?
Speaker 16 (26:28):
Yeah, yeah, flushes challenge ever?
Speaker 7 (26:32):
Yeah yeah, oh here comes a dollar.
Speaker 16 (26:35):
Well here's the thing though, No, no, no, I will
do it, but if you want a recording of it,
my toes aren't painted, so they're not cute. So do
I actually don't want you to see my toes right now?
Speaker 1 (26:44):
How bad could they end? About? Ten? Hold on? Ten
dollars a toe in?
Speaker 10 (26:49):
You?
Speaker 1 (26:49):
I gotta put your foot up to the ankle.
Speaker 16 (26:52):
Yeah, I'll sit in there all day, just till submerged.
Ten dollars an hour. I'll sit over there, all.
Speaker 1 (26:57):
Right, ten dollars, all right, ten dollars until this next
commercial breaks over?
Speaker 3 (27:02):
Why don't I record it like from the back, so
it's not like looking at her.
Speaker 16 (27:05):
I mean, y'all can see my gross foot here, but
ten dollars ten dollars to leave your foot in the
toilet up to your ankle until the commercial breaks over,
like go right now, yeah, okay, you'll do it. It's
gonna be okay if yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:17):
Thank for the listeners by this crazy call in okay,
so we can get you, so we can get you
on the phone. Get Yeah, don't leave until you've called in.
You know what else, Sammy she do you even know
the number? I don't even know the number. You can
flush to get the backline number here? Yeah? All right, yeah, board,
get her set up.
Speaker 5 (27:36):
Sammy Sheen got a nose job at the age of
twenty oh see goals Morgan.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
And now she's not only fan, so yeah, now she's
on only fan. Next next astronaut. I guess how about
if she want that nose job? Oh bad, pretty bad?
Ten bucks? Yeah, ten dollars closer.
Speaker 7 (27:52):
Yeah, every ten dollars counts.
Speaker 1 (27:54):
I love this comment talking about this Sammy Sheen foot
story or what she doesn't only fans? Is uh hear that,
Charlie Anonymous? Men are pleasuring themselves washing your precious daughter
dip her foot in the toilet and you and you
deserve it, and she goes, I have a daughter? Yeah?
Is that one of my angels. Yeah, oh is this Ah?
(28:14):
Is this Morgan on the line? Yeah? I mean someone
else their foot because it's it's the lines here. Put them.
You gotta put a you gotta put them on hold.
All right, I can pick it up in here. I
mean it's in the middle of the building. It might
not work all the way. I do have phone service issues.
I've done it. I did it in the bathroom, but
I had to do Yeah. Yeah, there you go, Morgan. Yeah,
(28:37):
all right, So you're you're in the echo, all right,
and the ladies. What if somebody walks in there and
you're just you're just sitting there. I mean I didn't
even lock the door.
Speaker 7 (28:46):
I was gonna say that door better stay open, you know.
Speaker 1 (28:49):
But can you imagine? Okay, so imagine like you walk
into work, You're like, you know what, I'm gonna hit
the restroom real quick before i put myself out of
my desk, and you walk in and then there's Morgan
with her foot and the toilet to her ankle, just
hanging out there. Wow on the phone. Yeah, I'm all right,
watch you go. Why don't you go check it? Check
it out? All right? Don't don't don't hang out Yeah,
Gina's on her way. She's like the Guinness Book the World, which.
Speaker 11 (29:11):
Kind of big.
Speaker 16 (29:12):
I have like a snize nine foot so it really
doesn't even go that far in.
Speaker 1 (29:16):
Oh did you did you play? Did you put it
in already? Oh?
Speaker 6 (29:19):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (29:19):
Was this?
Speaker 1 (29:20):
What's the way? Okay? Now that's fine? Said, that's right.
Can you hold the phone down there and splash around
a little bit of me here? Hold on here, listen,
watched it? Hey, Gina is her is her foot in there? Yeah?
Gina just got in here. She's taking a video.
Speaker 16 (29:42):
My calves looked real nice dang.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
All right, so you have to keep it in there
until the commercial breaks over and ten hold hours, do
anything right, We'll be right back the show. We'll be
right back. Now here's where it gets real. Yes, the
Woody Show will be right back. Show. How's the water? Morgan?
(30:05):
Is it cold? Oh?
Speaker 7 (30:09):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (30:09):
Her phone was good? Like the entire commercial break of course?
Was that a yup? It is? Is that a yep?
I think it was a no? Did she go all in? Morgan? Yeah,
you did it?
Speaker 11 (30:22):
It's up? All right?
Speaker 1 (30:25):
What you hang up the phone and then just come
back and come back in tell us all about it. Yeah,
leave like wet footprints, like a puppy coming back inside
from going out botty in the yard.
Speaker 5 (30:36):
You know what we are talking only fans. This is
a particular sub genre. Is a lady gets stuck in something,
let's say foot in toilets. Yeah, and then a man
approaches and things happen. Oh so like a hero, right damsel.
Speaker 7 (30:51):
And then he has found of flash afterwards?
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Well, so what was the total time of her foot
in the toilet? Ten minutes?
Speaker 16 (30:59):
Yeah, they're actually it's a big deal.
Speaker 1 (31:01):
It felt nice, it was it was a cold what's
the water? At first?
Speaker 16 (31:04):
It was cold like when you get in a pool
and it's a little chilly, but then you warm up
to like.
Speaker 1 (31:07):
Tamps in there or anything right stains like yeah, pootas.
Speaker 16 (31:12):
We're here so early. I think that might have been
the first toilet.
Speaker 3 (31:16):
I told you to flush it, so you get a
little whirlpool of that there for.
Speaker 1 (31:20):
Two quicken whole dollars, that's your money. What else? Will
you lick her toe? Now? How about for Morgan to
get that money? Would you?
Speaker 16 (31:34):
It was like, can I lock my own?
Speaker 7 (31:36):
Can Morgan lick her toe?
Speaker 4 (31:38):
If Morgan can get her nose job? Today I'll do it.
Speaker 16 (31:43):
I appreciate you looking up for my looks man.
Speaker 1 (31:44):
So that's that's a no. What I mean? I mean
there's a long way to go For eight thousand dollars.
Speaker 4 (31:49):
Yeah, for eight thousand dollars actually can get her nose
job money today.
Speaker 1 (31:53):
I'll do it right now. Now, foot on the table,
let's go, all right, sea bets. I thought that you
might be for this event. What that is the newest
sporting event coming to a screen near you. Sperm racing.
Sperm racing, and they've built a microscopic racetrack that mimics
the dynamics of a woman's reproductive system and guys go
(32:15):
head to head to see who's got the fastest swimmers.
I'm thinking, like, you always talk about being so superior,
and you got all these kids, like this would be
a really good competition. You're like the Michael Phelps of
the sperm race. And they don't let you into the
sperm donation program without good motility. So as they say,
the point is to bring attention to fertility and turn
(32:35):
health into a competition because it's something that you could
train for just like any other sport. How do you
make your sperm faster.
Speaker 5 (32:42):
How do you then, Well, what they advise when you're
a donor, like I was, selfishly self lesslie is they
say they they ideally refrain for at least two days.
That's it right now. That being said, I've done it,
you know, the day after five, and it worked out
just fine. I was never rejected for low speed.
Speaker 1 (33:04):
The new league will have everything the other sports have,
including press conferences, weigh ins, play by play commentary, and betting.
You'll be able to bet on the sperm races. You'll
be able to pick favorites, bet on the winners. First
race is going to feature competitors from U C, l
A and USC. Wow, it's a little crosstown rivalry. That
that's the ideal. Ag You want to get the young
(33:25):
college bucks out there with brains.
Speaker 9 (33:28):
So what do they procure the sample right then and
there behind a curtain or something, I mean, because it
has to be fresh.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
And then they got away why the palladium like a yeah,
you need space for spectators. Yeah that's odd. Yeah, but
sperm races, that's the thing. Now, do they need someone
perhaps to like make sure it tastes right or getting
are you? Are you voluntario? Because I know all, you
got to be a well rounded judge.
Speaker 5 (33:56):
You know, Hey, sure discussip experience, Yeah, discussing odor.
Speaker 1 (34:01):
Someone to get out of your hair, Henry say, hudo,
you know who that is, right the Oh?
Speaker 16 (34:05):
Yeah, he used to be a champ in UFC.
Speaker 1 (34:08):
So somebody broke into his house. His wife and kids
were asleep in the house. They I guess. There was
a detached studio that he's got that was broken into.
His first ever UFC championship belt was stolen, along with
ten thousand dollars worth of camera equipment that belonged to
his producer, who was asleep in the studio at the time.
(34:30):
So it sounds like an inside jobs.
Speaker 16 (34:32):
No one stopped them, he said.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
He just once his things returned, and if they are
he won't press charges, I guess, or kick the person's
teeth at the back of their neck. It's been interesting
times for him lately because this burglary just days after
he tackled and held down this alleged drunk driver who
tried to take off after he plowed his car into
his neighbor's house.
Speaker 16 (34:51):
Okay, I thought he was in the news.
Speaker 1 (34:53):
Yeah, yeah, So this guy's had an interesting week or
so street out.
Speaker 16 (34:56):
But yeah, I heard that have like a reward out
for the belt, because like, what are you going to
do with the belt? You can't sell it.
Speaker 1 (35:02):
All that stuff.
Speaker 4 (35:03):
Well, if you're watching the TV show Friends and Neighbors,
you go to the pawn shop and then there's a
secret room in the back of the pawn shop by
this kind of stuff. It's on Apple TV, not a sponsor.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
Yeah, there was a video of some guy talking smack
to some other dude. They're standing there in the aisle
of a stadium. It looks like, you know, just like
where people walk them down to get to their row
and their seat, and this guy he's talking smack to
it apparently is a fighter, and everybody's like, dude, this guy,
and he looks like the smaller of the two guys.
So the big guy think he's just using his size
(35:37):
to intimidate this smaller guy. But apparently this smaller guy's
death on wheels and he would have like ended this dude.
Speaker 4 (35:46):
That a lot of the smaller guys are into fighting.
Like when Morgan and I went to Power Slab, it
was nothing but short kings up in there, and they're
all ripped and they all could like take you down
in three seconds, because that's what they got.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
You know, they they're trained.
Speaker 16 (36:01):
Trained, they're lowered the ground, they're more agile, right.
Speaker 1 (36:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (36:04):
The guys who talk scrappy, guys who talk crap and Morgan,
you probably are meeting some of these guys are usually
the dudes who've taken like three months of some kind
of combat sport.
Speaker 1 (36:12):
So they like me, That's what I'm saying. So they
know just enough to not know how much they don't.
Speaker 16 (36:17):
Know, yes, and you get a little bit of ego going.
Speaker 5 (36:19):
And then the guys who know what they're doing, they
don't need to talk smack because they know what exactly.
Speaker 1 (36:23):
Are you still planning to have an actual fight?
Speaker 16 (36:25):
Yeah, that's the Actually have a call with the people today.
But my goal is by the end of the year.
We'll see what.
Speaker 1 (36:30):
Yeah that other fight we talked about, Anything happened with that?
Speaker 10 (36:32):
Oh?
Speaker 16 (36:33):
No, I need to email that guy again.
Speaker 1 (36:34):
Boxing boxing? Uh no, this one is awesome.
Speaker 4 (36:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 16 (36:37):
So the Official Pillow Fighting League, Yeah, someone reached out
to me from there and I was like, oh my god, Yes.
Speaker 1 (36:45):
If you put your foot in the toilet for ten dollars. Yeah,
but the pillow Fighting thing is on ESPN.
Speaker 16 (36:49):
Yeah it's actually legit. I would rule just crazy to me,
but then yeah, I haven't heard from them, so I'll
follow up.
Speaker 5 (36:55):
All right, it doesn't look super legit when I see it.
Speaker 1 (36:59):
It looks like some do. There's like backyard wrestling. Can
you put like pennies in it? What do you feel about?
Speaker 16 (37:04):
You know they're official because when he reached out to me,
he's like, we'll send you official pillows.
Speaker 1 (37:08):
To practice with and all this stuff.
Speaker 16 (37:10):
Official pill I guess they got lost in the mouth.
Speaker 1 (37:12):
They have to be a certain weight or whatever. They
like sony and handles and stuff. All right, My question
is have you taken a hit yet?
Speaker 16 (37:18):
I've sparred. I sparred for the first time two weeks ago. Yeah,
so I'm taking a hit, but not like an actual
real hit because when you spar you don't go full
force with something.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
It's like NFL players saying the speed and the intensity
and also the hitting, and you can't practice that. You
got to get into the game situation. So are you
worried about that?
Speaker 16 (37:36):
I'm not worried about it.
Speaker 7 (37:37):
I'm just kind of nervous.
Speaker 16 (37:38):
But I have a I have the sick feeling that
I'm going to like it and be good at getting.
Speaker 1 (37:43):
Yeah, I think so you feel alive. Yeah, I'm sure.
Speaker 5 (37:47):
It's not about pain threshold. It's about not getting not
falling asleep threshold.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
Is there a name for the style of fighting that
you're doing? Is it? I don't even know.
Speaker 16 (37:55):
What I'm training for. Is boxing? Because I'm too old
and uneducated in the fight world to get into mma.
Speaker 1 (38:01):
This really yeah, grappling.
Speaker 16 (38:03):
If I were to wrestle, I don't know anything about.
Speaker 5 (38:05):
The people who are champions now started jiu jitsu at
aged four.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
Yeah, yeah, they're amazing retiring by now.
Speaker 16 (38:12):
She was in Oh, they would be putting me to sleep.
So you're not doing the kicks. It's just I'm practicing
that in you know, my workouts. But no, when I
do an actual fight, it will just be boxing. Nothing
on the ground, you know, which I don't really like it,
but that's smart for me.
Speaker 1 (38:26):
Eight seven seven forty four, Woodie, you can send us
a text over to two two nine eight seven The
Woody Show. Now Morgan on the fighting thing, did you yes, Queen,
did you ever get in fights before you started fighting,
like so, just as a kid, like in school or trap?
Speaker 17 (38:49):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (38:49):
God.
Speaker 5 (38:49):
No.
Speaker 16 (38:50):
And that's what's so weird about me being into the
whole fight scene now, is I I don't know, maybe
five years ago hated violence still if there was a
street fight going on, I'd run away, you know. Yeah,
I'm kind of a little pussy when it comes to that.
But but now, like when it's organized violence, I went
into it.
Speaker 1 (39:08):
So what what attracted you to it? Like if that's
how you felt about, you know, stuff in the wild,
Like what what attracted you or what got you into
Was there a particular friend, were you dating somebody? I
know some people that got into stuff that way, like
other person they were with is in the football was
because of a guy? Yeah?
Speaker 16 (39:25):
Well it was my friend group, So my core friend
group that I see every Saturday. That's just what was
always playing in the background. And then after so many
months and as I got into it, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (39:34):
Yeah, Gen, did you ever get in a fight only
with family? No, I mean like a physical fight, I
mean really a physical with family with my brother?
Speaker 3 (39:42):
No?
Speaker 7 (39:43):
No, no, no, no, don't discount these these were.
Speaker 1 (39:46):
As adults, teens, teens, pretty rough, yeah, pretty rough? Who
I still kind of chalk that up to. Yeah, that's
a good question.
Speaker 3 (39:54):
Who won then yeah, probably you right, not even well,
you know when once the tears, you know, when the
blood started flowing, you know, I get the most Wow.
Speaker 1 (40:03):
But yeah, I mean we so not like sibling rivalry
kind of stuff. No, not brother and sister fighting, like
actual we threw down.
Speaker 16 (40:12):
Yeah, you should get into training.
Speaker 1 (40:15):
Yeah, I think I've left that behind. My daughter said
to my son last week or that we whatever was recently,
uh there were whatever he was He was messing with her,
and she goes, I'm going to kick you right in
the balls. And I thought it was so funny, sweet
little girl, I'm gonna kick you right in the balls.
Good for her, Yeah, knock it off. I had to
(40:39):
tell him because he she she was waiting and she
was being patient, but he was she reached. He was
testing her. For sure, you were getting a fight, Greg,
Not technically. I gott in.
Speaker 9 (40:53):
This situation where I pretended to chase a guy and
he fell down a hill and scraped his knees and
then he whipped around and started punching me, and I
punched him back and it got broken up in two seconds.
Speaker 1 (41:04):
So it sounds like, just by the way you described it,
that you won. Yeah. If I was another kid that
was always saying, everybody gather around.
Speaker 9 (41:10):
Ripped parents, bloody knees, and a couple of punches here
and there. But in general, like, if I think about
an actual fight, I couldn't do it for one second.
I couldn't go in to a boxing ring, no way,
especially you Morgan with wanting your nose job. So you're
getting into the thing that's going to be the biggest target,
not big size wise, but every boxer has a messed
(41:33):
up nose, right.
Speaker 16 (41:34):
Well that's the thing. I'm not getting a nose job
and then fighting. The goal is to fight and then
you know, yes, take me a while to make the
money to actually get a nose job, find a doctor
all that.
Speaker 1 (41:43):
So once you get the nose job, fighting over Oh yeah, of.
Speaker 16 (41:45):
Course I'm not wasting my money spiring. Yeah, no one's
touching my face after that.
Speaker 1 (41:49):
Madison, don't seem like you were a guy who got
in the fights. I got a few. Yeah, I got
arrested over one. You did, Yeah, as an adult, this
is adult. I was a junior. He was a senior.
Speaker 4 (42:03):
Yeah, he like stole some stuff from me. And then
he was talking smack. And then so I said hey,
meet me at my friend's house because we used to
have a break in between classes and I didn't think
he would show up, and he did, and I was like, well,
you got a fight. He punched me first, so it
was self defense, and then I broke his nose, and
(42:25):
then he went back to his parents' house with a
broken nose and bleeding all over the place, and then
they called the cops. His dad was actually a cop too,
but luckily my friends videotaped it and then so they
when I was at the police station, they go, we understand,
there's a tape, you know, can you provide the tape?
And I did, and it showed that he punched me first.
Speaker 1 (42:46):
I'm surprised, like a junior and a senior in high school,
they even went through all that because teenagers they you know,
it's the dad. That's how my friend Jo and I
became friends. Like we hated each other. We rode the
bus together every day to school, and it was just
one of those were I hated him, he hated me,
And it got to the point where one day on
the way home, it's like, all right, dude, when we
get off the bus, because we had the same bus
(43:07):
stop all right, dude. We get off the bus and
then you know, drop backpacks like you know, hockey players
dropping gloves, and we just beat the crap out of
each other.
Speaker 4 (43:14):
I did have two more fights after that, but it
was more Radio station one. It was awesome because I
went in with the hitter microphone to a bunch of
DJs and I talked back to them and one of
them got like legit pissed and wanted to fight me.
So they had me fight at a concert in front
of twenty two thousand people. And when I got got
face to face to him, I could see that his
lip was quivering shaking. I was like, oh, I got
(43:38):
this dude. I dropped him twice in front of twenty
two thousand people, which was awesome. And then the other
fight we did the previous warning show that was on.
We did blind boxing, so we all put on blindfolds
and we fought in like the hallway outside of the store.
We should do that, we should and just like just
wailing on each other, and I cracked this dude's tooth.
Speaker 1 (43:59):
Yeah did you have the terminology call you out? Yeah?
Oh yeah, yeah, what are you gonna call you out?
That's what happened when my first fight. Yeah, I brought
that guy's no, and at least back in this time,
like in the nineties, it was like early early early nineties.
Like the way the fight would always start between two dudes.
You'd have your arms out to your sides like this,
like almost like crucialfix kind of thing, and you'd be
like bumping chests like what are you gonna do? Go ahead, man,
(44:21):
go ahead, stupid. I had this one.
Speaker 4 (44:26):
I had this one in middle school where I headbutted
this guy when we got face to face, like yeah,
and to break his nose. No, but I got major
trouble from shuld it hurt you?
Speaker 1 (44:34):
Yeah, you're a man. No, my head cool? You know
my head is true, and it's cool when you're a
teenage not cool when you're an adult. Exactly. Now back
to the show, and it's another hour insensitivity training for
a twinically correct world. It is Friday morning. Yeah, gee,
(44:55):
thank you for being here. Give it us some of
your valuable time this week. Let's get into this weekend
as quick as we can. I'm Woody. That's great, Gory, Woody,
We've got menace. What is up? There's a Gina grand Hey, there,
Happy Friday, Sea Bass, there is Sammy phones are open.
Morian's taking your calls eight seven seven forty four. Woodie.
You can send us a text over to two to
(45:15):
nine eight seven. You're gonna need that number coming up
blitter on this hour, in fact, because we have the
Dumbass Contest, which on a Friday, of course, will be
the d U y Q. Yeah. Right now, time for
your Friday failed stories. All right, ladies and gentlemen, boys
(46:06):
and girls, it is time for your Friday fail story.
All people thought they had the perfect plan, the plan
that could never go wrong. Within somewhere along the line
it went from being a great idea to one big staken,
mega uber ultra fail our best. All right, well we'll
(46:45):
start with this one. We talked about this one earlier
this week, and I would be remiss. I'd be remissed
if I didn't tell you that's become one of our
favorite worst off the air. Yeah, I would be remaing.
And it also has to be in like some kind
of acts I tell you.
Speaker 4 (47:04):
I'll tell you all about tricycle.
Speaker 1 (47:08):
Yeah, I would be remiss if I didn't include this
in the failed stories. It's that US Navy super Hornet
fighter jet that accidentally fell off the aircraft carrier and
into the ocean. It's not expensive. It happened while the
jet was being towed out of the hangar bay. The
crew ended up losing control, which ended with both the
plane and the tow tractor going overboard. No big deal,
(47:30):
the plane itself only worth seventy million dollars minie. Oh no,
the Navy is investigating. But get this, this is the
second plane, the second super Hornet that they've lost on
this deployment. Yeah, yeah, yeah, to reevaluate that stuff. I
saw some video yesterday and they were talking about this
General Aviation aircraft that was circling around. This is like
(47:53):
way back in the forties maybe fifties, and it was
like a high, high wing plane and they're circling around
this aircraft carrier and the guy, the pilot kept trying
to drop a note out of the out of the
door so to get to let the guys on the
deck know what was going on. First one goes in
the water, second one goes into the water. Finally third
(48:16):
note drops it and the guy's like, look, I'm running
out of fuel. I'm not going to make it back
to land. I need to land on the carrier, okay, right,
And it was a US aircraft carrier. It goes, but
you got to make room. You got to get some
of these helicopters just out of the way, right. And
so instead of guys getting in the helicopters and flying away,
they pushed them off the edge of the aircraft carrier.
(48:38):
Why into the water. I forget, like two or three
two or three of these military helicopters pushed him into
the water. And here comes the guy. He lands on
the deck. He had his wife and his kids in
this little like Cessna type plane. Yeah, you know, and
and then he was yeah, and then and the guys
were all psyched, the guys who were on the deck
(48:59):
and there and clapping and everything else, while the helicopters
are on the ocean.
Speaker 10 (49:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (49:03):
So anyway, how you get a choppers out here? So
that was one of the questions. That was one of
the questions that they had, like would that still happen today?
Would they still be pushing because I think at the
time they said it was like less than two million
dollars worth of helicopters. Two million dollars back then, exactly exactly,
But I'm saying, would they still they still do the
same thing today. I don't think they would. I think
(49:24):
they try to figure something else out. Yeah, I would hope.
Just fly them off the aircraft car. You got a
couple guys who can fly helicopters right, circle around for
a bit. Yeah, the people laand let the guy land
and then put the helicopters back, and then I.
Speaker 8 (49:37):
Don't know, she didn't have time to circle around.
Speaker 1 (49:39):
Next up is this one in Colorado about this guy,
Lucas Brown is his name. He was locked up in jail.
He was working as one of those kitchen trustees. You know,
you can get those jobs where you have some trust
you've you know, they can do things in the kitchen
or maybe it's like a wood shop. Yeah, whatever. And
when he went to go take the trash out, he escaped,
didn't get very far. He was on the run for
(50:01):
a whole thirty five minutes. And this is my favorite
part of the story. He was scheduled to be released
two days later. Oh man, Obviously those plans have been canceled.
Speaker 9 (50:12):
Maybe he had to poop man and he didn't want
to poop right in front of it.
Speaker 1 (50:16):
Then gak no word on how much extra time is
being tacked on due to the escape attempt, But yeah failed,
he sailed. Here's one from Michigan where the nice people
at Saginaw County Animal Control got a call from this woman.
She had bought a couple of rabbits for her kids,
and they did what bunnies do, and they start breeding,
you know, rabbits ray, and she couldn't get them to stop,
(50:39):
and now her house has been overrun. She tried to
control the breeding, she said, she separated them and pens
in her basement, but they got around that. They nod
through drywall and other materials. The containment was damn near impossible.
She estimated they were around fifty altogether, but when animal
control got there, it was more like seventy. And many
(51:01):
of the horror chick rabbits were pregnant on top of
all that. So officials are doing everything they can to
play some in good homes, but at the same time
they're just reminding everybody that even well intentioned pet ownership
sometimes has some pretty unimeasurable situations without the proactive spang
and neutering that you're supposed to do. And they're bunny sales.
That's what bunnies do.
Speaker 5 (51:19):
Well.
Speaker 1 (51:20):
Sometimes you get so horny you gnaw through you all.
Speaker 4 (51:24):
Looking it up. I'm like, how long do rabbit stay pregnant?
And it said twenty eight to thirty five days.
Speaker 8 (51:29):
Oh yeah, it's quick. They have quick turned around.
Speaker 1 (51:31):
So she's a grandma already. Here's one from doublin, Ohio,
where this fella, Anthony Collier gets how old he is?
Greg I'm gonna go with sixty nine. Yeah he is. Oh,
he's sixty nine years old. He decided he was gonna
rob him bank, so he walked out of the bank.
He hands the teller a written note demanding the cash.
The teller gives them the money, and he takes off
(51:51):
in a super sweet blue Hyundai Tucson. Hell yeah, okay.
Cops able to track him down because in his rush
to get away, he ran a red light and when
they got the plate number from the Hundai, it turned
out to be a rental and guess whose name and
phone number was on the rental agreement? Say his it
says Anthony Collier. So he was arrested charge with felony
(52:12):
first degree aggravated robbery. Take it to fail jail sale,
and my favorite fail story of the week. This is
from Georgetown, Kentucky, which is about an hour east of Louisville,
and that's where this fifty year old guy, James Farthing,
he won big on the power ball, one hundred and
sixty seven point three million dollars. Big guys. He just
(52:36):
picked up his check this week. James splitting the award
with his seventy seven year old mother. So good son,
but they won't be enjoying any experiences together for a
while because James is in jail. The very next day
after picking up his check, he got into a fight
at a hotel that he was staying at. He punched
(52:57):
at least one other guy, and when the cops showed up,
James kicked one of the officers in the face. Right,
So he was charged for felony battery on a law
enforcement officer, among other things. And he's in even deeper
trouble because he's an ex convict. He was already on parole,
so kicking this cop in the face certainly violated that
(53:17):
parole and so now he's going to prison. Meant to
be what a dumbass happy?
Speaker 8 (53:26):
What did he have to be so angry about?
Speaker 9 (53:28):
Take a breath, chill out, count your money, walk away,
god man, pay somebody else to do it.
Speaker 1 (53:36):
Yeah, he's a real hair trigger. Yeah he couldn't help that.
Eight yeah, forty four. What he is? The phone number?
Use that number now to give us a call. We're
going to open up the phones for a round of
the dumb Ass Contest today. The duy Q is coming
up for us next. That's where SeaBASS is talking to
one of the drunks that he encounters on the streets
(53:56):
and asking them some questions. You just have to guess
will the person get it? Yes or no? Two out
of three times correct and you will be a winner.
You'll win some kind of prizem Not sure exactly what
it is, but we got a prize up for grabs.
If you want to play the d YQ, call now
eight seven seven forty four Woodies. We've got a dumb
(54:18):
ass contest for you, man, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls.
Today's dumb Ass contest is the.
Speaker 10 (54:26):
Cue you.
Speaker 1 (54:29):
If you want to play eight seven seven forty four,
Woody is the phone number. That's eight seven seven forty
four Wooding. You can send us a text to over
to two to nine eight seven what's this song? Oh
eight wall Nation kill your heroes? Thought, yeah, everyone, while
most of the time I'm not even paying attention. Huh
so I know there's a song or whatever playing, but yeah,
(54:51):
that's a good song. The song SI too. I love
sound Smember.
Speaker 4 (54:56):
We did that event with them and they did all
huper huge production of the song.
Speaker 1 (54:59):
Yeah yeah, nice dudes. Bit all right? Uh SeaBASS whytch.
You explain the way the game works, everybody, please.
Speaker 5 (55:04):
I asked a drunk person very easy questions, So the
game isn't for you to answer the questions. You and
everyone you know can answer these questions on the tip
of your tongue. The game is this, this person so
drunk that they don't know, So you guess whether they know,
and if you're right, two times out of three, you win.
Speaker 1 (55:17):
All right, eight seven, seven forty four woodie, And uh,
we're gonna get guesses from Menace and Sammy for no
reason at all. Well, Medace is on cold medication or something.
Speaker 4 (55:29):
The hell my, my eyes are just really strong.
Speaker 1 (55:32):
And he wasn't feeling well and so he was waiting
for the medication to come.
Speaker 4 (55:34):
Oh yeah, I'm fine, now, okay, you're good. My eyes
are killing me. Well hopefully man that brains a lot.
All right, Yeah, let's see how you do and we'll
go to U. Let's see Keona. Did I get that
name right?
Speaker 1 (55:44):
Keon?
Speaker 11 (55:46):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (55:47):
Hey Keona? How are you? Good morning? Happy Friday? Thank
you for calling you play the g U i Q
here on the Woody Show. Now, before we get to
the questions that actually count toward winning a prize or not,
we're gonna get to know the drunk person a little
bit better. And who is this person? Sea bass is.
Speaker 5 (56:00):
Jay and he's out drinking and so he will tell
you and he may have slipped in a few other things.
Speaker 1 (56:04):
Okay, here is Jay. What if you had to drink tonight?
I had like.
Speaker 2 (56:08):
A fireball and take you out some rice and a
lot of good stuff. I like vodka and a little
bit of cocaine.
Speaker 1 (56:21):
I'm sorry, like not that, I'm sorry.
Speaker 7 (56:23):
I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (56:24):
I'm feeling pretty drunk.
Speaker 2 (56:26):
I love everyone, like I hope everyone is having a
good night and like just get drunk us, like, have
a good night.
Speaker 1 (56:32):
What a sweetheart.
Speaker 7 (56:34):
I like him.
Speaker 1 (56:36):
This is not a greg thing.
Speaker 9 (56:37):
But with the gaze there just flair, verbal flare exactly, how.
Speaker 1 (56:43):
Can you not enjoy it or you do that noise
though with the bugs.
Speaker 9 (56:48):
That well, let's we've heard you. That's a reflex. This
is a happy I can't control that.
Speaker 1 (56:54):
Well, that is Jay, and you're just gonna have to
guess whether he's gonna know the answers these questions two
out of three in order to win. Uh.
Speaker 18 (57:01):
And the first question everybody ready, yes see U I Q?
And what part is your body? Would I find your femur?
Speaker 1 (57:09):
All right? This is a repeater probably yeah, probably m h.
Speaker 5 (57:14):
These two have been on a bit of a cold
streak recently, so I'm trying to help him out with
some easier stuff.
Speaker 7 (57:21):
Sammy did pretty good.
Speaker 1 (57:22):
Yeah, Sammy was okay last week. All right, so let's see.
I think that Jay will not j will not get it.
I think, hmmm, Sammy will get it. Menace. I can't
tell if it's the cold medication or if but I'm
gonna say no for Menace. All right, So they were
they were one out of three last week.
Speaker 3 (57:43):
I'm going to say thank you, no to Jay and
yes to Sammy and Menace.
Speaker 1 (57:48):
All right, Greg Gory, No to Ja. Yeah, I'm gonna
mix it up. Yes to Menace. Uh, menace and Sammy,
what do you think, Jake, get it right? Yes or no?
Speaker 15 (58:03):
No?
Speaker 1 (58:04):
No menace?
Speaker 10 (58:05):
No?
Speaker 1 (58:05):
All right, Keyona, what do you think, yester j j
No no.
Speaker 18 (58:12):
Question number one d u i Q And what part
of your body would I find your femur?
Speaker 1 (58:17):
Menace? Your upper leg like thigh type area? Sammy, your leg?
Your leg is the correct answer, Noice, Greg I said
yes to you, Mad All right. I'm pretty sure Jay
would know a thing or two about having a bone
in your body. You know what I'm saying. I'm just guessing.
(58:39):
I'm just guessing. But I don't think he's going to
know the answer to this question. If he doesn't, you're
gonna be on the board with your first point.
Speaker 18 (58:44):
And what part of your body would I find your femur?
Speaker 1 (58:47):
I guess ahead? Your head? What else going on your
head right now?
Speaker 14 (58:50):
To Jay?
Speaker 2 (58:51):
A lot of.
Speaker 1 (58:56):
Yeah, a lot of bones have been in his head,
that's right.
Speaker 4 (58:59):
And the reason I know the femur thing is because
remember my buddy half Big broke his femur.
Speaker 1 (59:05):
That's right. Oh, Keana, great news. You're on the board.
You got your first point here on the d u
i Q. Just need one more point to be The
winner this week was half big doing like a nine
hundred or something. No, he was just walking, okay, sorry.
Question number two for the d U I Q.
Speaker 17 (59:20):
What animal are sometimes people called as drunk as a
Oh god?
Speaker 1 (59:27):
What's the phrase?
Speaker 11 (59:28):
So?
Speaker 1 (59:29):
Yes for Sammy, I'm gonna say no for j yes
for menace?
Speaker 3 (59:37):
All right, I'm feeling a I'm feeling pretty optimistic. I'm
going triple yes, all right, Greg.
Speaker 1 (59:44):
Gory, I'm gonna triple yes it as well. All right,
all right, it's just going crazy menace, Sammy. Do you
think Jay gets it?
Speaker 4 (59:52):
No, I'm gonna say no, And I was gonna say
turtle all right, yes or no?
Speaker 1 (59:57):
Will Ja get it? J will not get it? Question
number two do you like? Q?
Speaker 17 (01:00:03):
What animal are sometimes people called as drunk.
Speaker 1 (01:00:07):
As a menace? Skunk? Sammy?
Speaker 8 (01:00:10):
Skunk?
Speaker 1 (01:00:11):
What animal are? All? Right? Interesting grammar there? But are people?
People are? That's the subject, right?
Speaker 17 (01:00:21):
What animal are sometimes people called as drunk as a people?
Speaker 1 (01:00:26):
Is horrifically worded? Wow about creative? That's so embarrassing. What
animal are? People sometimes are not understanding? Like if menace
I said it, it would just be you know that
tracks what? Okay? Some jokes there said that j would
(01:00:50):
not get this right. No, if that's the case, she
will be the winner of that. Do you i Q?
Here on question number.
Speaker 17 (01:00:54):
Two, what animal are sometimes people called as drunk as a.
Speaker 2 (01:00:59):
And an, I'm coyote because just sty're cute, but they're
not cute.
Speaker 1 (01:01:05):
All runt? Well, Kayota, congratulations you are the winner on
the d U i Q. Very simple work there to
the ke and hey, so happy for you. Congratulations. Hang
on one second, and we appreciate you listening to the Woodie Show.
Have yourself a great weekend.
Speaker 11 (01:01:23):
Okay, you to thank you.
Speaker 1 (01:01:26):
That's all right, bye, Well, and I love the logic.
Speaker 3 (01:01:30):
It's a coyote because sometimes they're cute and they're not.
Speaker 1 (01:01:33):
They're not cute.
Speaker 5 (01:01:34):
They can be cute, but they're not cute.
Speaker 1 (01:01:37):
I'm not cute.
Speaker 4 (01:01:39):
I mean yea like sometimes yeah babies.
Speaker 1 (01:01:45):
But every babies. Cue all right? Question number three, which
Keona did not need the U i Q, but just
for fundsies, here we got on the radio. A DJ
is short for what.
Speaker 10 (01:01:58):
All right?
Speaker 1 (01:01:58):
If this is not a yes for both Menace and.
Speaker 3 (01:02:02):
Sammy, Yeah, I'm confident in them.
Speaker 1 (01:02:05):
I bet you. There's a lot of interns in this building.
Speaker 5 (01:02:08):
Oh, yeah, who that's true, Morgan. That could be a
new assignment around the office.
Speaker 1 (01:02:13):
Morgan salespeople. Morgan, don't look but yeah, don't don't look
at your computer. Yeah, I know what it is. Guys,
come on, you know what it is. Okay, all right,
let's take guesses around the room, including.
Speaker 16 (01:02:27):
I'm not the hard word on this show. Yeah, Morgan,
but there's a reason I'm not included in the guessing.
Speaker 10 (01:02:35):
Right.
Speaker 1 (01:02:36):
Oh, she didn't say she said she's lashing out.
Speaker 16 (01:02:41):
I did not name Sammy at all.
Speaker 1 (01:02:42):
Maybe she's talking about it. You were lashing out, that's right.
Speaker 16 (01:02:45):
I just think it's funny'all. Think I wouldn't know it.
Speaker 1 (01:02:47):
Just because you're a young tel. I have nothing to
do with intelligence, had to do with age.
Speaker 16 (01:02:52):
Oh I mean I'm pirty.
Speaker 1 (01:02:55):
That's what I said. Yeah, I forgot. She is hell old.
She's like, where are the eight tracks? All right? What
do you think, Gina?
Speaker 3 (01:03:07):
I got burned by Jay, So yes to Sammy and
Menace and Morgan.
Speaker 7 (01:03:11):
No to Jay because that coyote answer was.
Speaker 1 (01:03:13):
No to Ja, yes to Menace, Yes to Sammy. And
since she's so confident, yes to Morgan. Greg Gory agreed,
I'm saying no only to j Yeah, okay, uh, here
we go. Question number three for the d U i
Q on the radio, a DJ is short for what now,
all three You're gonna say your answer at the same time,
(01:03:35):
Okay on the count of three, one, two, three, shocky?
All right? Nice? Nice? What are the discs referred to? Morgan?
Speaker 16 (01:03:47):
What do you mean compact?
Speaker 1 (01:03:48):
This I was coined before the compact disc. It would
have been for records record spinning the plant is that matter?
Pumping the wattage to college and make your damn I'm
up to my pits and hits, folks, cylinder hooking up
(01:04:09):
like a tow truck. On this two for Tuesday, we're
getting the let out this American graffiti over here. Yeah yeah,
make sure you tune it later on a mandatory Metallica
during wolf Man Jack. That's right, October, I forgot I'm
rocktober all right. Question number three for the d U
i Q on the radio. A DJ is short for
(01:04:33):
what for DJ do? What's the letter D? Letter J
short for it.
Speaker 2 (01:04:38):
For DJ, meaning like I could just play whatever they want?
Speaker 17 (01:04:42):
What is the D and the J stand for DJD
DJ It's like d J.
Speaker 1 (01:04:52):
Alright, like that j Well, that's the d u i Q.
Speaker 5 (01:04:56):
That's not disappoint We're gonna take a break More Woody
Show next, Hang on the show.
Speaker 1 (01:05:01):
We'll be right, We'll be right. We'll be right back.
SoCal Sports snick Jeff Ge and he's been doing a
bang up job all this week filling in for Jeff
g who is out. Yeah, but it's dumbass Tyler. He's
got the update on the SoCal Sports. Good warning everybody.
Speaker 14 (01:05:20):
Week one of the NFL season is officially less than
a week away, and to celebrate that fact, the Rams
and seven other teams released new rivalry jerseys for later
this season. These jerseys are something, with the Rams one
being well to be honest is not great. LA released
their Midnight Mode jerseys featuring dark blue colors and a
dark blue helmet, while the shoulders on the jersey are
the normal lighter color of blue. They're not the best
(01:05:42):
jerseys the league released yesterday, but they're also not the worst.
The Rams will wear them for play only once this year,
using them for their Week eleven matchup with Seattle in
college football. Week one kicked off last night and more
of this weekend's games tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (01:05:55):
Are some really good ones.
Speaker 14 (01:05:56):
USC will take on Missouri State tomorrow at four point
thirty on the Big Network, while UCLA will take on
Utah tomorrow at eight on Fox. There are also some
juicy national matchups, with of course number one Texas playing
number three Ohio State at nine, followed by number eight
Alabama versus Florida State at twelve thirty and number nine
LSU versus number four Clemson at four thirty.
Speaker 1 (01:06:16):
To wrap things up.
Speaker 14 (01:06:17):
Over in the NHL, Kings legend and center Onse Copadar
sat down with the media yesterday and for the first
time in years, he talked about the dreaded R word retirement.
Speaker 10 (01:06:26):
If I said I didn't think about it, I'd be
lying for sure. I've been thinking about it. Not everything
is quite decided yet, but this could be my last
season in the NHL.
Speaker 14 (01:06:40):
If this indeed is Coope's last season, then I want
the statue of him built outside of Crypto before the
last whistle sounds. In soccer, the Galaxy stay home and
try to fend off Orlando City FC at two on Sunday,
while LAFC also stays home to take on SDFC at
seven thirty on Sunday, going to baseball, and the Angels
are staying in Texas, this time heading to Hugh to
start a weekend series with the Astros starting at five
(01:07:02):
ten tonight. The Dodgers stay home and welcome in Arizona
for a crucial series with First Pitch tonight at seven
ten and Blake Snell on the Hill. And last, but
not least, in wrestling, w W will be holding their
clash in Paris, PLD on Sunday with a special start
time of ten am. I'm dumbass, Tyler and n'ts your
sokow sports dumbass Tyler.
Speaker 1 (01:07:20):
Everybody, nice job, Tyl. Thank you very much, Tyler, all right?
Telling people checking in on the text over to two
two nine eight seven eight one eight Happy Friday. Love
you guys. You make my mornings. Three one Oh you guys,
(01:07:41):
fing Rock and Woody. I loved hanging out with you
in Philly last year. You're the man. Okay, nice, thank
you for that. Taylor checking in Friday vibes today, I'm
looking cute but feeling like ish. Oh you and Menace Yeah,
Menace is looking cute looking at cut Yeah. And then
(01:08:01):
we got this one. Let's see nine three yeah nine
three six Morning guys and gals listening in from Dallas.
Love the show. Hope you all have a great weekend.
I'll be getting extremely blazed and we'll slip into a
stoned euphoria. Oh we love it. Hell yeah. Any kind
of weekend plans Friday check ins? Hit us up on
(01:08:23):
the text open to two to nine eight seven. All right,
do you buy it? This woman in China claims that
she got herpies from holding a carry karaoke mike too
close to her mouth. I can see that. Is that possible?
Speaker 17 (01:08:37):
Maybe?
Speaker 1 (01:08:37):
She says, it happened back in twenty seventeen, and then
a few days later she noticed painful blisters popping up.
But would it be a few days that I don't know.
That's not instant, right, I know, but a few days
seems short? Yeah, like maybe it'll be like have to
how does it take good? She gotta checked out in
boom HSV one. That's the virus that causes cold sores,
(01:09:01):
and it's for life, no cure, just occasional flare ups.
You mes, you know, manage it and stuff. But you
to twenty days?
Speaker 4 (01:09:05):
Yep?
Speaker 1 (01:09:06):
Okay, So by doctors having confirmed if it's even possible
to catch herpes just from the microphone. But either way, Uh, hey,
if you're doing karaoke, why would you are putting you
to it? Why would you put that microphone to your lips,
like let your lips touch that thing? Ye kind of
the song?
Speaker 9 (01:09:24):
Yeah, you're feeling the vibe. Yeah, just getting way into it.
Speaker 1 (01:09:27):
Yeah, well, I mean, look, karaoke can be fun. There
are situations where it can be fun. It's not one
of those things are good. It's not one of those
things it's all the time fun. Like the people that
they go to karaoke all the time. Oh yeah, but
if you happen to be somewhere, like you didn't go
there seeking out karaoke, but there happens to be karaoke,
(01:09:48):
that's where it could be fun. I think it's weird
seeking it out.
Speaker 4 (01:09:51):
I agree, really, because that's where the people are good.
Speaker 1 (01:09:54):
Yeah, that's why that's why they take it's too serious exactly.
I don't want it where the people are taking it
real serious. It's like it's fun on the shoot pool, right.
I find it not so fun when you get the
guys walking in they're bringing their own pool cubes and
start every cause they take it. It's like I don't
know how you take something, so I don't know. It's
like a pastime. It's like taking horseshoes too serious. It's
(01:10:16):
just supposed to be fun. Bowling.
Speaker 7 (01:10:18):
Who are you auditioning for?
Speaker 1 (01:10:19):
This is? This is another thing I took way too
serious bowling. I got to remember I joined the league.
This is years ago the company I was working for.
At a Christmas party, I had so much fun. I
joined the league part of my all or nothing personnelity,
right and uh and so. But yeah, now it's like
I look back and I go, how stupid like bowling?
Like you're at a place where the beer is served
(01:10:39):
in bottle shaped like bowling pins. It's it's meant to be.
Let's get drunk and fun enrolla.
Speaker 9 (01:10:45):
But also as a patron, I don't want to hear
Joe Blow singing a song. There's this guy and he sucks.
Speaker 4 (01:10:52):
Kind of The story recently got shared online, which I
would have loved to witness. That h chaperone was at
some like, I don't know, outdoor barbecue place in what Chita,
and some guy was doing karaoke and then he asked
people like, oh, anybody want to do a duet? And
her friends like said, go do it, go do it,
and then out of nowhere you have Chopper and no
(01:11:15):
one knows, no one knew who she was at the time.
Just have somebody be an incredible singer out of know where.
That would be kind of cool.
Speaker 1 (01:11:21):
I think the worst carry very rare. I think the
worst karaoke ever saw medicine. I were both of this
wedding and one of our really good friends got married,
and like was it was it the brother or the
cousin or something like one of the family members got
up there and and did billie idol rebel yell and
here I captured this just on my phone. Let me
get into there now, correct me if I'm wrong. Menace
(01:12:01):
this family member Filipino deploy Like that's a disappointment to
the family. It's a disapployment to all Filipinosilipinos they're known
for being amazing at karaoke. Oh yeah, they take you away.
Speaker 9 (01:12:14):
Serious, Yeah, but this is what I think of when
I think about karaoke. Yeah, I don't want to be
sitting at a bar having a beer and this guy's
up there.
Speaker 1 (01:12:22):
But if it's one of your friends, That's what I'm saying,
Like just you not so good. But if you like,
if we all went at someplace.
Speaker 19 (01:12:35):
Yeah it was a wedding, Yeah, it's a wedding.
Speaker 1 (01:12:42):
It was kind of late in the night.
Speaker 4 (01:12:43):
Everybody was Luckily I was able to walk out, turning
up and stuff separated from them.
Speaker 1 (01:12:46):
My wife broke the bottom of her champagne flute or
whatever it was. So she's walking around with basically like
a crystal dagger and she's barefoot. She took off her
uncomfortable with very nice shoes. Possibly it was that time
of the night. You know, I get it, and uh yeah,
I don't even like live music at places. Agreed with bands,
(01:13:08):
I agree, But again I think it has to be
the perfect storm for karaoke. Like if we all, like, okay,
everybody in this room, we were all out somewhere just
kind of hanging out casually and whatever and just getting
man got up there, we would all think it would
be fun because medicines up there. I wouldn't do that.
Gina got up there. Let's assume you were fun for
a second. I am fun. Yeah, even I would get
up there. And I mean, you know, everybody got a
(01:13:30):
sign that they're saying. But I'm with menace.
Speaker 9 (01:13:32):
Even a band that does this as a quote profession
I don't want to one end.
Speaker 1 (01:13:38):
Remember we walked into that one place and once they
had the live no right, yeah, what I do, turned
right around. He walked out. Everybody just went in there
to go like, Okay, we'll go in this area because
it's supposed to be like a really cool space, like
a like a hidden but you were there for that.
Speaker 7 (01:13:55):
He walked out.
Speaker 1 (01:13:56):
Yeah, So like we just want to take a look,
give one drink. We're not gonna be hanging out. We're
just gonna get one drink and leave. We literally walked in.
We were there for twenty five seconds. Where's menace? He
already walked out. Yeah, I told you. One of the
worst experiences of my life.
Speaker 4 (01:14:11):
I was at STK restaurant in Orlando and they had
a DJ and I was like, okay, cool, but then
there was some live saxophone player like playing the whole time.
Speaker 1 (01:14:21):
It was a freaking torture.
Speaker 4 (01:14:25):
And uh, I'm like why And I went on online
and complained.
Speaker 1 (01:14:31):
That's a very sea bass. Why would you do this?
That sounds like something you would all this and can
we can we quit it with the fake speakeasies. Now,
it's not the twenties. You're not being cute.
Speaker 7 (01:14:41):
It is cute.
Speaker 1 (01:14:42):
I like them, of course you do. Because you're walking
through a hidden door is fun. Yeah, it's it's intentional.
It's not actually a speakeasy. Okay, here's it's not prohibition.
I didn't know it was there until I knew it
was there. True, I mean I walked by this. Yeah,
one hundred times. They did their job. I just wish
they had DJ that would have been cool. Eight seven
seven forty four Wooding The Woody Show got another new
(01:15:07):
hour insensitivity training for a politically correct world. Appreciate shit
being here with us today. Phones open eight seven seven
forty four, Woody. That's eight seven seven forty four Woody.
You can send us a text over to two to
nine eight seven. I want to get into this this topic.
(01:15:28):
It's that I hate to break it to you, but
now Greg had his situation, any situation. The update with
that the garbage.
Speaker 9 (01:15:37):
Cans one, Well, there's two main offenders that are side
by side houses. One has kind of gotten better. They
still have what I call the indoor trash can right
by their mailbox. Yeah, but then the one to the
house to the right of that. They still leave their
cans out seven days a week, twenty four to seven. Okay,
and it still looks dumpy, and it's still in the way,
it's out in the street.
Speaker 1 (01:15:57):
Who hadn't heard the situation, you know, Grace got these neighbors.
It's like, you're supposed to put the trash cans out
the day that the trash gets picked up, but it's
out there all the time, and it just keeps getting
bigger and bigger. They have more and more cans. They
have stuff outside sitting outside of the trash cans. And
then the Sea Bass went and put the postcards in
(01:16:19):
the mail, pictures of their trash cans in front of
their house on a postcard with.
Speaker 5 (01:16:25):
Attention attention to you, disgusting pigs that live at this address.
Maybe you don't understand like how things work.
Speaker 1 (01:16:31):
But they yeah. And so here's here's something that I
don't do every day. I am. I am siding with
a homeowner's association. That is not that is not a
thing that I normally do, but I'm I'm doing it
in this situation. As woman in South Jersey, she is
(01:16:52):
beefing with her h o A over her chickens. I'm
sorry her emotional support chickensies. That's her. It's uh yeah,
it's gotten to the point where she's even lawyered. Up
here she is in the news with her lawyer telling
her side of the story.
Speaker 5 (01:17:08):
We received an email from the board saying that we
weren't allowed to have them, we weren't allowed to.
Speaker 11 (01:17:12):
Have our coop, and that we needed to get rid
of them immediately, and then they served us with a lawsuit.
Speaker 1 (01:17:17):
And we've been in court ever since. It's almost three
years now.
Speaker 13 (01:17:19):
During depositions, you know, opposing counsel was asking ask LORI,
do you kiss your chickens? And I mean, it's just
I think that kind of shows to your point that, yeah,
people aren't taking this seriously because it's chickens.
Speaker 1 (01:17:35):
It's cute, it's.
Speaker 13 (01:17:36):
A little funny, it's a little odd.
Speaker 1 (01:17:38):
No. And she, by the way, she saw a big
improvement in her PTSD symptoms after getting the chickens. The
overused word, right, I mean unless you were at war, Yeah,
if you were the military PTSD, I don't.
Speaker 3 (01:17:52):
Get how like I'm anti hwakeus, Like I don't if
I pay for my house.
Speaker 7 (01:17:57):
I don't want to be told what color I can
paint the.
Speaker 3 (01:17:59):
Door, but that I know I wouldn't be a good
fit for that neighborhood. Why is she in this neighborhood?
She's got to go.
Speaker 1 (01:18:05):
Okay, now here's the thing. I live in a neighborhood
with an hoa, and yes, they are a pain in
the ass about things that they shouldn't be a pain
in the ass about. However, we have that neighbor a
few houses down who has that giant pig. Yes, oh
right right, And the person who lives next door to
them drives them nuts because the thing will make these noises.
(01:18:26):
He looks out, he wakes up in the morning, says,
he opens up his bedroom blinds for the master bedroom.
I'm sorry, the primary bedroom break yes, and he looks outside.
He's like, oh, what a beautiful day. And then, you know,
kind of looks down and sees this giant pig. Where
the hell do I live? So, yeah, I'm gonna use
this as my I hate to break it to you
because I know it's very popular. Now. I hate to
(01:18:48):
break it to you, but if you have farm animals
in a suburban neighborhood, that's trashy. Yeah, like the neighbor
who's got the pig trashy? You got chickens, and you
don't live out in like a rural area, trashy backyard
chickens they have a name trash right, Yeah, okay, what
about duck trash? What about bees trashy? Yeah? Yeah, you're
(01:19:12):
like a keeper.
Speaker 9 (01:19:15):
My neighbor bees. He's a chef, so he makes his
own honey.
Speaker 5 (01:19:19):
So he gets they don't bother anybody. Bees like like
it's like a birdhouse, like a small version.
Speaker 1 (01:19:24):
Yeah, there's big boxes, like with these wooden boxes. So
there's no right or wrong answer. It's just my opinion.
You can't agree or disagree. That's fine. I'm sure I'm
going to agree or disagree with other ones that people have.
But I hate to break it to you, but if
you have farm animals in a suburban or city industr
you know, like urban suburban or urban neighborhood, that's trashy. Yeah,
(01:19:45):
but baby goats trashy, little babe.
Speaker 5 (01:19:49):
The problem with chickens is roosters because there's noise, and
chickens are not cute.
Speaker 8 (01:19:56):
What if it's a suburban area, but you have like
two acres.
Speaker 1 (01:20:01):
Uh, two acres because acres.
Speaker 12 (01:20:05):
Because I That's how I grew up, was I had
about two acres so to my neighbor.
Speaker 8 (01:20:09):
We weren't spread far apart like it went. It went
like further back.
Speaker 12 (01:20:13):
But it's mostly woods and stuff like that, right, but
you're still yeah, but you're still next to and he
had a bunch of chickens and turkeys and rabbits and
all the stuff.
Speaker 3 (01:20:23):
Sounds Yeah, you're not like you couldn't throw something from
one window to the other and catch it.
Speaker 1 (01:20:29):
If you have two acres, that's plenty of space. Yeah,
and that's not suburbs. Yeah, that's definitely more like a
massive lot. That is huge.
Speaker 12 (01:20:37):
Yeah, but again most of it isn't really usable. It
was still very much next door.
Speaker 1 (01:20:42):
You are still here two acres, yeah, just because but
I think I think suburbs are.
Speaker 5 (01:20:49):
Everybody are connected to each other more than a quarter
and a half, a like subdivisions.
Speaker 1 (01:20:55):
Yeah, right, what he lives in the suburbs.
Speaker 3 (01:20:57):
Correct, I haven't hated to shine. Yeah one pigs and.
Speaker 9 (01:21:02):
Your hate way door doesn't do anything about the people
that park in front of the mailboxes.
Speaker 1 (01:21:05):
Well that's oh no, yeah, they don't do a thing
about a lot of the stuff. But the stuff that
you know you would want them to do something about
They don't, right, they're gross. Yeah, all right, So I
hate to break it to you, but it doesn't have
to be something with neighbors or anything that. It could
be anything. I think one of the other ones I
mentioned before. I hate to break it to you, but
white people dreads are not for us. I've never seen
(01:21:27):
a cool looking white person with dreads. I go, wow,
that looks really good, and it looks looks terrible. He's
not saying this from any kind of culture appropriation thing.
It just looks bad. It looks dumb like white like
black dudes all day could pull off the dreads. It
looks great and.
Speaker 3 (01:21:42):
It smells bad because my college boyfriend had him and
had to put peanut butter in his hair to get dreads.
Speaker 5 (01:21:48):
That's That's the other thing too, is it's not often
it's a looks thing. It's a lifestyle things for her.
It is all right, So what's your I hate to
break it to you. Phones are open eight seven seven
forty four. Wood If you like to share, won't go
around the room. You can send us a text the
Woody Ship. I hate to break it to you, but
nobody looks good with the stupid lip injections. Even slight
(01:22:11):
ones look ridiculous. That's coming in from the two to
one three.
Speaker 1 (01:22:15):
Well, yeah, it made Kylie Jenner a billionaire. Oh yeah,
because a bunch of people are dumb. Yeah, and they're like, oh,
I'll look like none. Yeah, so I hate. I hate
to break it to you. Yeah, you definitely shouldn't be
able to tell. Yeah eight seven, seven forty four. What
if you want to call it with yours, send your
text over to two to ninety seven. We're gonna say
sea beast.
Speaker 5 (01:22:34):
Oh yeah, that's I've said before. That will be the
bell bottom jeans of this decade. Is these stupid fish lips,
because I see them all the time on women who
just don't need it.
Speaker 1 (01:22:43):
Yeah. Uh, let's see. I hate to break it to you,
but just because you have your blinker on doesn't mean
you get to go. That's true. Agree, It's like I
warned you, yeah, come and go.
Speaker 4 (01:22:54):
Yeah yeah, but yeah, so don't be a dick a
right yeah alsome no matter how hard I try to
go back, I hate to break it to you.
Speaker 1 (01:23:02):
But Jipotle's just mid man. It used to be all
about chiple.
Speaker 4 (01:23:09):
I I I come and go, and then I'm like,
I give it another chance, and I think like, oh,
it's gonna be good.
Speaker 1 (01:23:17):
It's just not it's just not good.
Speaker 20 (01:23:19):
Yeah, you try them out again, you try them Barbacoa
joins menos. I did, and then it's just like, nah,
why am I doing this? Why might keep on forcing myself?
There's other places some melancholy about it. Yeah, So mid let's.
Speaker 1 (01:23:36):
Go to Jimmy here on the phones eight seven seven
forty four wood. He is the phone number. Good morning, Jimmy,
good morning, good morning. All right. Hate to break it
to what do you got for us?
Speaker 11 (01:23:48):
I hate to break it to you. But if you
go out to check your mail and a bathrobe, tennis
shoes and pantyhose, I hate to break it to you
could just put on pants or sweatpants. Nobody wants to
see you. Old lady out in penty hose and a
bathrobe checking her.
Speaker 1 (01:24:02):
Mail sounds very specific. I see that like all the time.
Always this one person.
Speaker 11 (01:24:14):
Sees it.
Speaker 1 (01:24:15):
Okay, so there you have a neighbor who does this,
or your wife does it following Oh no, no, no, no, no,
no no.
Speaker 11 (01:24:21):
My wife is three ft eleven. She couldn't get away
with that. But well yeah, she she she, she sorts, Okay, yeah.
Speaker 16 (01:24:29):
All right, she can't.
Speaker 3 (01:24:31):
We all right, I got one that might be controversial,
and callers are never good.
Speaker 4 (01:24:41):
It's just like, well, my buck.
Speaker 5 (01:24:45):
Is full of uranium, I must drink it.
Speaker 1 (01:24:49):
All right, let's move on.
Speaker 7 (01:24:50):
I got one.
Speaker 3 (01:24:52):
If you belittle a waiter, you deserve whatever they do
to your food.
Speaker 11 (01:24:58):
In it.
Speaker 1 (01:24:58):
I don't care.
Speaker 7 (01:24:59):
Put put some mirror allergic to doing it whatever.
Speaker 3 (01:25:01):
I am so sick of people trying to like impress
their date or impress their friends by being rude to
wait staff.
Speaker 7 (01:25:07):
I can't take it people.
Speaker 1 (01:25:10):
Yeah, let me impress you know who it always is.
Speaker 3 (01:25:16):
It's always somebody's friend who's dating a new guy, and
the guys like acting like a total.
Speaker 1 (01:25:23):
Just a tool jay off. Yeah, and like what's wrong
with you?
Speaker 7 (01:25:26):
And what's wrong with her for picking it? Like is
that how you impress her friends? So I don't care
what they do to your food at that point.
Speaker 1 (01:25:32):
Also, yeah, my son tells me a lot of stories.
He works at an amusement park and he works in foods.
They have him at the different you know, they move
them around the different areas of the the one place
was it's it everywhere problem. Yeah, you know, and they're
they're getting really pissed at this fifteen year old kid
who just took the order. I hate that he didn't
(01:25:52):
have anything to do with preparing the food. He doesn't
have anything to do with how long it's going to
take before it comes out. And he tells us some
of the stuff. These people just walk up and say
to him and freaking out and throwing things.
Speaker 8 (01:26:04):
And throwing things.
Speaker 1 (01:26:06):
Yeah, that's a huge trend. Yeah, they'll take something just
kind of throw it back behind the counter. That's what
I'm talking about. The little tantrum.
Speaker 3 (01:26:13):
All the people that are like going insane on like
fast food workers and stuff.
Speaker 7 (01:26:17):
I don't care what they do to your food at
that point.
Speaker 1 (01:26:20):
Yeah, And Gregor, are you saying that people have enough
stuff because you want everybody to park in their garage
and stop storing stuff. That's a good side.
Speaker 9 (01:26:28):
I hate to it, but if the tech you have
a garage and you don't park in it, you have
a mental disorder.
Speaker 1 (01:26:33):
Sea Bass.
Speaker 5 (01:26:34):
Hate to break it to you that mine is going
to be very much similar to Greg's because I just
saw this this week. Hate to break it to you.
But if you own a designer brand T shirt anything
with the logo of the company on it, and you
think that's fancy, it's doing the exact opposite. It's showing
you that you are a trashy moron. Because I busted
a guy doing Carton narks and he walks out of
(01:26:54):
his you know, Mercedes whatever wagon, which looks hideous. By
the way, he's wearing something men as you might know this.
It's ball mom Parie b A l m A I
ball main, I guess, And it's just it's just ball
Paris on a black T shirt. I looked at because
people started commenting on, oh my god, he's got a
blah blah.
Speaker 1 (01:27:10):
Blah now that medic can pronounce. By the way, Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 5 (01:27:13):
Five hundred and fifty dollars Ray T shirt that just
says the bread And every time I see a Gucci
T shirt or those are so or this dude, Well,
you go to certain parts of Vegas and all the
trashy foreigners wear him. You look like a moron, and
you're doing the exact opposite of what you're trying to accomplish,
which is to look cool and swapping exactly you think
(01:27:33):
you're flexing and.
Speaker 1 (01:27:35):
Called quiet luxury. Look into it.
Speaker 5 (01:27:37):
It's called conscious consumer, conspicuous consumption, I should say. And
it's very much like what Greg just said, like stop
falling for the new themed Trader Joe's bag.
Speaker 1 (01:27:48):
Bag soon and then you're gonna say, oh my god,
it's cute. I need stop just buying things to buy
things menace what I haven't bought anything lately?
Speaker 5 (01:27:58):
Oh really, mister, I need size ten and a half
Easies black color.
Speaker 1 (01:28:02):
Years ago.
Speaker 5 (01:28:07):
Half size. But it's a new thing every year. It's
this and that and that.
Speaker 1 (01:28:13):
Stop it, everyone, stop it only by my things, see.
And I feel like it's therapeutic for a lot of
people to finally say, because you sit there and you
bite your tongue, you're like, you know what, whatever neighbors
got the pig? Your life so trashy farm animals in
the suburbs. Here's a text message seven one four. I
hate to break it to you, but just because you
(01:28:34):
work out doesn't make you an influencer.
Speaker 5 (01:28:37):
Yes, if you're if you're filming yourself in the gym
at all, you should be kick You should lose your membership,
you should be kicked out because what you're doing is
number one, you're probably not doing the exercicks correctly. And
number two, no one cares about you doing six have
bad squats.
Speaker 9 (01:28:52):
And you know, what's the equivalent of posting yourself brushing
your teeth. It's just maintenance of your body.
Speaker 1 (01:28:58):
It's the version of it cares.
Speaker 5 (01:28:59):
It's the version of taken a photo of every meali
you eat. You're doing very mediocre, as menace will say
mid workouts and you have to video that.
Speaker 1 (01:29:07):
Why which, Greg, thank you for reminding me my body
is due for its maintenance. Bringing it from me, Yes, maintain.
I hate to break it to you, but not everyone
wants to be married with kids. It's not an accomplishment,
it's a.
Speaker 5 (01:29:21):
Choice's not a popular thing anymore. Quite frankly, I hate
to break it to you, but women cheat more than
men do. From the nine to seven to two. True,
I think they cheat just as much.
Speaker 1 (01:29:34):
I don't ever buy that whole thing about well when
it comes to stuff like that sex, you know, I
think it's it's a human thing. It's a desire thing.
Women may not vocalize it as much, but you can't
tell me they're not thinking about it, because so the
only thing about when they get around their girlfriends or
they're reading cause because that's what everything in those magazines
(01:29:56):
for that are aimed at chicks is about. Yeah, it's
all the articles about ten ways to make him, you know,
curl his toes. Yeah, it's like all that's what all
those articles and stuff about when you see those those
women's magazines, So you can't maybe they just don't talk
about it as well. Gross is like maybe the guys
will or.
Speaker 5 (01:30:13):
The numbers say that men are it's like four or
five times as many. Yeah, because just think about it.
Bio Biologically, the risk for a man for cheating is
way less than the risk for a woman for cheating.
Speaker 3 (01:30:22):
Well, and also Greg loves this word, so I'm going
to say it. It's all about the biological desire to
spread your seat exactly.
Speaker 1 (01:30:27):
Yeah, but who has the better opportunity be women? Hate seed?
Speaker 11 (01:30:31):
Seed?
Speaker 5 (01:30:32):
Of course women have the As we said, any woman
who's not disgusting can walk outside and have sex in
ten minutes.
Speaker 1 (01:30:38):
We also see people online who are in relationships and
they're disgusting, so.
Speaker 5 (01:30:41):
They're But the point being is that women just don't
want to as much again because it's the cost is
so much higher for them if things go on.
Speaker 4 (01:30:47):
Yeah, there ain't no lady Genghis Collins out there.
Speaker 1 (01:30:50):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 9 (01:30:51):
Well, I think we can all agree. Though I hate
to break it to you. Women are sloppier than men.
Speaker 3 (01:30:56):
Oh, I think there's so much except for Sammy who.
Speaker 1 (01:30:59):
Blows out the curve.
Speaker 8 (01:31:00):
Yeah, I don't think that I am.
Speaker 1 (01:31:02):
She's ironing sheet little bit. Yeah, I just don't have
a lot of space here. Your desk is kind of
a catch off for the whole Oh my.
Speaker 8 (01:31:10):
God, that desk. Yeah, I just ignore it and got
my backpack there in the morning.
Speaker 7 (01:31:13):
But I don't she doesn't claim that space.
Speaker 1 (01:31:15):
No, look at a car by women's bedroom, woman's bathroom. So,
by the way, Greg, she does. She does not keep
her piles organized on her desk. That's she throws them willingly. Yeah.
Nine five one. I hate to break it to you,
but you're a pos. When you're done with your snacks
and your drinks in a movie, and when the movie's over,
you get up and everything on your lap from your
drinks in the popcorn and the wrappers and everything just
(01:31:37):
fall on the ground. You walk away like nothing happens.
Speaker 5 (01:31:39):
Yes, people have advocated this as a cart Andark spin off,
and there's there's some pushback on this because they give
the excuse.
Speaker 1 (01:31:46):
Well, they pay people to clean up. Yeah, but they
also they have a trash can at the entrance, and
you know what it's there for, right, we paid firemen
to put out fires, So let's just set fires. Yeah,
if it's like a kernel of corn or you know,
like just like some random kind of like a little
piece of the corner of the wrapping from the candy
that you had and you couldn't see it in the dark,
I get it. But like when you're leaving the big
popcorn bucket there and all the cups and drink on
(01:32:07):
the floor.
Speaker 3 (01:32:07):
Yeah, yeah, we somebody was sitting in our ticket in
our seats when we went to a baseball game, and
really they were and left mountains of trash that we
then had to sit in.
Speaker 7 (01:32:18):
Like those people are those people are animals.
Speaker 1 (01:32:20):
Agreed, Agreed, Thank you. I hate to break it to you,
but joining MENSA doesn't make you better than anyone that's
from the eight one to eight my definition.
Speaker 5 (01:32:27):
It does literally the definition of smarter.
Speaker 1 (01:32:34):
It's coming up Hand.
Speaker 10 (01:32:39):
Show.
Speaker 1 (01:32:40):
We'll be right back the Woody Show. Hi, welcome back.
A couple of follow ups to hate to break it
to you, and yeah, by the way, on the MENSA thing,
the person sending, uh, just because you have you know
you're in MENSA whatever I forget exactly said, it's basically
(01:33:00):
just because you maybe you're a better person anybody. And
uh this one says Sea Best's claim to being a
member of MENSA the equivalent of Al Bundy's three touchdowns
in one game from pol Kai Neat story, but has
absolutely no substance or relevance to your adult life and occupation.
I think anybody here can answer to that one.
Speaker 5 (01:33:20):
Because the person whose job it is to like analyze
things talk about stuff fa your situations out.
Speaker 1 (01:33:24):
So being smart doesn't help with that, okay, right, three
two three. I hate to break it to you, but
just because you lift heavy weights of the gym doesn't
mean you can kick anybody's ass.
Speaker 5 (01:33:32):
That's true, but it does give you it's it's it's
uh one of the power.
Speaker 1 (01:33:36):
Yeah, it's it's you. You you stay out of fights
by being big. I hate to break it to you,
but the boo boo dolls are ugly and a waste
of money. Go all in on. Yeah, you know the
stocks are down. Time to invest. Yeah, let's let's just
go straight thet boo boo. Yeah. All right, So I
(01:33:56):
have this, uh, I have this story here and I
want to fun mind because I do. I do have
a clip that goes along with it. Here. So this
is the second time this year has happened. But there's
a story about a little kid getting into his grandfather's
ashes and eating them. What the most recent one, and
there is video of the aftermath. This kid had opened
(01:34:17):
the urn and got ashes everywhere, I mean all over everything,
all over himself. It was around his mouth. You know
when you see a kid, you're like, what have you
been eating? Like to have cheeto dust all over? Like
he didn't open it up with a spoon, but he
certainly did consume some of it. Oh, he got into
the Yeah. So here's here's the clip. This is the mom.
The mom was mortified, as you can imagine. Here.
Speaker 5 (01:34:41):
Some washing.
Speaker 1 (01:34:43):
Later, I've had to mention fun with an accent, fun accent,
fun accent.
Speaker 8 (01:34:46):
Sorry, some washing a few minutes later, and he had
held over his mouth.
Speaker 1 (01:34:54):
I was in complete shock.
Speaker 14 (01:34:55):
Oh my god, when you soon eat she died as
my son Hussey and my dad's.
Speaker 1 (01:35:02):
Lash, dude, Greg, did you catch what she said?
Speaker 5 (01:35:10):
When your son eats your dad's ashes? People are starting
to talk like TikTok video. She said, what about then
she's showing, She's showing the aftermath.
Speaker 1 (01:35:20):
And this has been because I think there's a visual reference,
because that this is basically this is what happens.
Speaker 5 (01:35:25):
The sentence would be my son ate my dad's ashes
exactly when. But there's visuals stuff. I don't understand how
you don't get those beams.
Speaker 1 (01:35:35):
People are now speaking like captions on social media. But
what he was making the she was showing it the
ashes all over the place, I mean because it is
all over the couch, it's all over the floor. You
see the urn tipped over, and it's just it's everywhere everywhere.
So I think it gives it to the context that
it needs to. I don't know what she should have said,
(01:35:55):
po V when your son, she says, uh, she doesn't
think he ate that much, that he just like maybe
tasted it, spat it out and just played with it.
But I was with him forever. Yeah, a couple He's
gonna crap Grandpa. A couple of months ago, there was
(01:36:16):
another story where another toddler had emptied out a makeshift earn.
And you know, by the way, everyone's got a cute
name for their grandparents, it was his peapaw's ashes. Yeah.
The mom vacuumed the mess up before she realized what
the dust was, and then realized that the kid may
have eaten some of that too tasting.
Speaker 9 (01:36:34):
Grandpa kids are gross. If I was a grandpa, I
would say, you are not calling me pipa. Yeah, yeah,
that's a dumb one. I don't I don't like that one.
Speaker 1 (01:36:43):
Would you call it? But you had names for your
grandparents like the Russian uh yeah, baba and ja okay,
but you don't like peapa, but grandma and grandpa exactly.
And then AmAm on apa pa that's estonia. M okay,
that makes more sense. Why did you just say grandpa great?
Because Greg, you can pay rules grandma. That's weird. We
(01:37:08):
got more Woody Show coming
Speaker 12 (01:37:09):
Up, hanging hey, if you feel like you could be
a swast China Woody Show
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