Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
You can never hate them enough, you know, Adam Adam
Chef Pelosi, they want you to hate them.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
They're begging you to hate him.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
Really seem hell bent on being hated by half of
the country.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
Adam Scheff is telling you, you radio listeners, screw you.
Speaker 4 (00:21):
We need to speak out, We need to be courageous.
They come after me all the time, Elon Musk and
Donald Trump. They called me a criminal, they called me
a trader. Their maga minions online come after me to
try to intimidate me, to create fear. I'll tell you
my response. My response to that is screw you and
(00:42):
the horse you rode in on.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
I believe him. And who is this talking?
Speaker 1 (00:45):
That's Adam Chef, one of the Well he's now the
senator in California, didn't he Oh yeah, he's not in
the house anymore.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
You guys. He's just want tough son of a bitch
right there. And he doesn't mind it if you hear
him say harsh words like screw him. He tough, old bastard.
He knows what's right. I think what democrats ask pop
him right in the mouth. They're listening too much to
every now intoor.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
She just want to ball.
Speaker 3 (01:09):
No, No, Billy, No, that Woman and Johnson Show does
not endorse that.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
No, that Hatfield Show does.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
No.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
Everybody on this show.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
What Billyett is saying right now is for satirical purposes.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
Only a novelty. He does not mean that. I want
our lawyers to make that clear for legal reasons. Billy
at Hatfield does not want.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
To pop it. Trying to keep your I'm trying to
keep you out of jail. You got to keep you
employed here, and I'm not sure why you're doing it.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
You want to pump it. You want Adam Schiff to
take his double wide? Have you seen his fat wife?
Where do you think she's gonna go? She lost some weight?
You know how much did she lose? Well, I mean
it's a pretty good amount for her. I'm sure she
doesn't like me talking about her weight on the radio.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
Is she like a buck ninety two ten? What are
we talking under? Two now? Really?
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Oh, that's that's progress. So that's exciting. Can you get
her out of the bathtub?
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Is my question? Did I put her into?
Speaker 4 (02:00):
Well?
Speaker 3 (02:00):
When you're look, you can't? I got you, okay? You
mean like on the bath night?
Speaker 1 (02:05):
You can't just hose her off every time she needs
to be clean, no cause that water's cold this time
of year. Yeah, she's gonna want to get in the tub.
And then what do you stop it? Well, how much
Crisco does that take?
Speaker 3 (02:15):
H Well, you know, we we don't buy it by
the tub anymore. We get it delivered by the palette.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
I guess it's puff dad. He went to prison.
Speaker 3 (02:23):
The cost of baby oil went down a little, you know,
supplying the ball. It's hard to get baby oil these days.
I don't know what chickens make it or something.
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Kansas City police confirmed there was no foul play in
the death of three friends found frozen in their buddies
backyard last year. I remember us covering this news story
and then totally forgetting about it.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
They said it was no foul play. I thought they
arrested somebody over the Okay, so it sounds like they
didn't do it on purpose. Now they're being charged within
voluntary manslaughter. They so does sound like some foul play
if people get arrested. A bunch of guys got together,
A bunch of white boys in Kansas City got together
and watched a football game, and they all fell asleep.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
And what's outside in the winter. Well, it sounds like
they did drugs, right.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
The friends, Ricky Johnson, aged thirty eight, David Harrington, age
thirty seven, Clayton mcgheiney thirty six, each died of feentanyl
and cocaine toxicity. I don't know a lot about cocaine
or fentanyl, but I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to
mix them. One of them is an upper, the others
a downer.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
And it could be one of those things. They didn't know.
Speaker 3 (03:25):
If Red Bull vodka is bad, that maybe they didn't
know that they were having Fittnel.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
You're fair, that's a fair point.
Speaker 3 (03:31):
Yeah, it seems to be stuff people are just slipping
into other drugs nowadays.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
The Walner Johnson Show doesn't endorse any illegal drug use.
But I gotta think if you're trying to play it safe,
nose an arm, that's the dangerous stuff. Stay away from
the nose, Stay away from the arm. Bags of the
dangerous drugs were found inside thirty nine year old Jordan
Willis's home, where the friends had been hanging out to
watch the Chiefs football game together January seventh, twenty twenty four.
(03:57):
Two days later, two days later, their bodies were found
out back.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
You know, nobody came looking for him, like the next day, Wow,
you're a cocaine and fentanyl user. Probably let's say they
didn't show up for work, but these guys probably didn't
have a job. Well, their loved ones finally wanted to
know what happened, and they're finally going to get answers.
Kansas City Police have concluded their investigation, announcing this week
that they were bringing in voluntary manslaughter charges against Willis
(04:23):
and his alleged drug dealer, forty two year old Ivory Carson.
Is Ivory white boy. It doesn't say if it's a
guy or a girl here, It doesn't I don't know Ivory.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
Here we go. It could be a white girl. But
I'm guessing that's a brother. I got a photo Ivory
here on the street. Is it looked like Jingles? Y'all?
Do remember that movie, do you so?
Speaker 3 (04:45):
White boy guy sent to prison for something he didn't do,
and he met a brother in their name of Jingles,
mister Bojangles, no whole different Jingles all together, and this
is Jingles. He was he was giving him a hard time,
all right. So they found that Thomson. I like movie,
how bad. Could it be if it's Tom Salad was
a good movie?
Speaker 2 (05:03):
Here was an innocent man. I can't imagine Tom Selleck
was in the kind of movie that would shock me.
Speaker 3 (05:08):
Jingles wouldn't a innocent bro. I'll tell you that too.
Somebody had to put a shield. Any mister, What is
it the white Why do white girls like TV shows
and movies about prison and murder so much?
Speaker 2 (05:20):
I don't know why it is, but I do find
it attractive.
Speaker 3 (05:23):
You know, a woman want to sit down and watch
one in hardcore scared straight life into prison kind of shows,
I'm down at her.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
You know who doesn't like watching that? Anyone who's ever
been arrested?
Speaker 2 (05:36):
They are gone to jail.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Am I the only person in this room that's ever
been in the backseat of a squad car.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
I know a couple of you gots. God know, Billy
ed you probably once or twice. Yeah, but it was nothing.
It was no big deal. I never had to put
the clothes on, like, I never got charged with anything
serious enough where they're like, here's your pink or black
and white striped outfit.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
Yeah, orange jumps, orange jump suit, right, orange.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
I never had to have you know, the caprice sun
or eat the blowny sandwich. That's not a euphemism, by
the way. It could be no, but it's not. I
never usually I was gone by morning. But uh, you know,
but having been in jail for a few hours, I
never once thought to myself, Man, I'd really like to
go watch some prison movies after this.
Speaker 3 (06:16):
Having spent a few hours in the backseat of police
cars on multiple occasions, so I will say it can
be a life changing experience.
Speaker 1 (06:25):
Wait, the way you say it makes it sound like
you wanted to be in the back seat of it.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
Well, yeah, it wasn't against my will or anything. It
wasn't a salt you know. It wasn't a like rape
or anything.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Is this like that Lana del Ray song where she
has sex with the cop in the back seat of
the car?
Speaker 2 (06:39):
Can we take a break? Is it too soon to
take a break? It's I gotta uh.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
I didn't even know they had gay cops. No, oh,
they never. What made you think there were gay cops?
Speaker 1 (06:51):
The thing you just said, the thing you just said
a second ago is what made me think that.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
You know, when there's a story about a lava nado,
don't think we need to be talking about no gay stuff.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
He's right.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
I thought we were going to talk about this an
hour ago. Okay, So there's a tornado that got mixed
up with some lava. It's kind of like Trenday Aragua
and MS thirteen doing a collaboration.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
What handles sound good? Where was this exactly?
Speaker 3 (07:14):
Well, that that Hawaii vacation you had planned to might
have gone hold if you were planning on visiting the
volcano over there.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
Car I just realized what this was. It's going up.
It's a volcano.
Speaker 3 (07:28):
To the.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
End of the world, end of the world. These are
prophecies from the end of time.
Speaker 3 (07:38):
And it's brought to you by Hey would Harvest one
of our favorite spot.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
All of our sponsors are great with goods and or.
Speaker 3 (07:46):
Services that make your life better, but he would Harvest
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Speaker 1 (07:53):
Yeah, if you're gonna die in a lava NATO rapture,
you might as well enjoy a little bit of calm
relief from the pro you find it.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
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Speaker 1 (08:02):
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Speaker 3 (08:08):
Type it all out all five letter wand J. That's
bond that's the promo code.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
What do you got? So this wild scene was called
on video For those of you.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
Who think people just make this stuff up. Hot gases
and dangerous lava spun together into the air over a
freshly formed molten pool. Yeah, that's the lava at the
bottom of the volcano. And as it pours down the
side of the hill, see it pools up and then
(08:37):
you can see the lava splashing around and the volcanic
gases starts swirling and next thing you know, next thing
you know, lava nato a funnel that looks kind of
like a dust devil, you know, swirling around like that,
only it's swirling around over a pool of molten lava
(08:59):
then sucking it up into the NATO to make.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
It a Nato. That's prophecies from the end of town.
Speaker 3 (09:06):
Is that a scary end of time stuff right there?
Speaker 1 (09:08):
I wouldn't want to get suck to do a tornado,
but with the lava in there, Now here's my question.
What with the speed of the lava, the speed of
the tornado moving so quickly, does the lava turn into
stone as soon as it starts whirling around and then
it becomes like little rocks that start pelting at everybody.
A shotgun blast or something. Yeah, like a Dick Cheney
on a hunting trip with his buddy.
Speaker 3 (09:28):
It's like a superheated shotgun pellets. Now, if you heated
all the pellets up in your in your shotgun shell
to where they were glowing red but not quite liquid yet,
that's what you're getting hit with, buddy. That'll that'll hurt.
And here's a picture of some of it if you
if you just wanted to see it. You know, not
everybody can see this. Those of you paid extra for
(09:50):
your radio to have a camera on it.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Yeah, I bet more people wish they had done that,
you know, Yeah, I got the camera option. Right, I'll
describe what he just showed me. It looks like red
with yellow stuff. It looks like a Honestly, it kind
of looks like a Rothco painting.
Speaker 3 (10:04):
But it is a sea of I mean, I don't
know how big it is, but look there's a Yeah, wow,
that's a lot of lava.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
How much how much lava you've made here? That is there?
Speaker 1 (10:16):
More?
Speaker 2 (10:16):
Not care to mess? That is a lot of lava.
And I gotta tell you it's not the.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
Only volcano that's going off right now. They've got they've
got earthquakes and volcanoes going off regularly now in the
Ring of Fire area, which is huge, it's like, you know,
big part of the globe. I noticed this has been
happening once a month lately. It's like once a month lately.
There's just a few.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
Days, several days set aside where this hot red lava
starts bursting out.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
Of the earth and like the Earth has to just
like get it out, yeah, and get rid of it,
and just for that one. It's not the whole month.
Speaker 1 (10:52):
It's just really like six days issue, like not even
a full week. And when that happens, it's like, boy,
get out of the way. But I can't think of
anything to compare.
Speaker 2 (10:59):
It to now. But you can.
Speaker 3 (11:01):
Scientists say they can kind of predict when they're coming
now because uh, right before this eruptions, there's apparently the
Earth that starts rumbling or grumbling or or just getting
kind of just testy.
Speaker 2 (11:15):
Ye know, And it usually starts to crave chocolate right.
Speaker 3 (11:17):
Right right now, I ask it under the name of
the monotheistic god Brahma, Amen, and a woman Wilton and
Johnson's some good news this morning. I know the stock
market been sucking lately, but the good news is in.
It looks like my idea of h gray ashes for
(11:40):
Catholics that uh you know, ain't white idea, that my
idea about the gray ashes for black people is really
catching on, getting a lot of positive email, hot good
spin about it.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
You know.
Speaker 3 (11:55):
When I talked to the the people down there at
the uh what you call that copyright place, they said
they never heard nothing this great in a while. So
it looked like I'm probably on my way to fabulous
wealth and riches beyond all compare.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
You're gonna copyright white ashes or gray ashes?
Speaker 3 (12:13):
No, it's done, It's done. They went ahead and said, yeah,
I got there.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
It's a natural phenomenon. They called it brilliant. You know,
but I get that a lote. I feel like they didn't.
I feel like you're making this up.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
It's all taken care of it. Okay, Well, you know,
why would you lie so great? Point eight sixty six.
I believe you you're telling the truth. I'm saying I
don't think you're lying to me.
Speaker 3 (12:35):
And people email about me too, they said, looks like
Billy Ed was right.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
I'm always right, you know.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
You know he saves those emails and prints him out
and he shows them to pre Lane when you send them.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
Sure, he has a stack of them at home every time.
Speaker 1 (12:47):
Yeah, he spent an hour the other day trying to
get the copy photocopy.
Speaker 3 (12:50):
Of machine interrupted. My Billy ads right moment. Huh, okay,
tell us why you're right, Billy. This lady says a
broken hip on an old person is pretty much a
death sentence. Yeah, a fractory hip is an emergency surgery.
Orthopedics was my thing back in the day. She says, uh,
(13:10):
we fix people so they could ambulate. I don't know
what that means, but anyway, she's right broken, and there's
a medical professional here. Obviously, broken hip is pretty much
death sentence for old people.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
So there you go. I forget why we brought this
up earlier. You said, if an old lady breaks her hip,
you gotta put her down. Yeah, you know, my mom's
staying at my house right now. She's got a fake hip,
of fake nee, her shoulders, fake, everything's fake.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
When you I'd like hardly eaving your mom anymore. I
know she's like RoboCop yesterday. I think robo mom. Yesterday
one of my coaches, Bob. Coach Bob was saying, you
know your mom's in town, you got to bring her
in and lift some weights and stuff. I thought, I
don't think that's going to happen.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
I just have a My mom's a beautiful person, but
she doesn't strike me as the kind of person that's gonna.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Squat this week. I no, no squatting. No, absolutely not.
Speaker 3 (13:56):
And like we told you yesterday, benching is in like
nineteen ninety this old Now everything is like full body.
If you can't do a chin up that ends with
the bar at your thighs, then you're not really even
doing a chin up, are you? When I do chin ups,
what I like to do is like propel myself up
over the bar and do a handstand with the bar
(14:16):
and then and then I swing back down.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
Who doesn't swing up? Handstand swing? I enjoy that. How
they call it, they like it's it's called out like.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
They're called kenny chin ups. That's what I yeah, that's
what I call them. I heard it called a muscle up.
They're called kins, but you spell with the k. Experts
say San Francisco is sinking fast and could be unsalvageable
if something isn't done soon, Well, won't.
Speaker 3 (14:39):
The ocean water wipe away all the human feces on
the sidewalk though ocean water? I thought they were talking
about the forty nine ers when I read this, the sinking.
The sinking, Oh they mean the earth? I thought they
was about the football, just the city. Oh, I'm confused.
I thought, Oh, my bad. Well, and I would the
team be sinking? Didn't they have a bad season? Well,
then I don't get no. If they don't get somebody players,
(15:01):
that's it. They Toulson the good ones aside, apparently they're cheap.
They got tight with that money. They don't want to
pay anybody in one hundred and fifty two hundred million
dollars and that's insane.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Well, apparently there's a defensive coach available now if that
could help him out. The Denver Broncos just fired defensive
assistant Mike Wilhoyt ten days after he was arrested. All
he did was punch a cop at the Denver Airport.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
Well, at least it wasn't something over his coaching skills.
So if he goes to another team, and I wonder why,
why Broncos cut you loose. Oh, it wasn't about my coaching.
It's just, you know, punching cops. I've spent a lot
of time in that airport. I think almost everyone on
this radio show has been arrested at that airport, and
we've all wanted to punch somebody. Usually not a cop, though,
(15:44):
it's just people. Sometimes it's those people that don't walk
on the moving sidewalk.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
Yeah, I want to punch them. You know what, I'm curious.
I might go eat lunch at the airport later today.
That sounds like a good idea, right there. They've got
a stick and shake. It's the only one in our city,
and it's at the airport, and they're now on.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
This side of the TSA or on the other side.
Speaker 3 (16:05):
You got to go in, so you have to buy
a ticket to something so you can have a boarding pass,
or you can't get past the TSA to go eat lunch.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
Well it's that or get killed by seed oils. I
mean you tell me, yeah, Yeah, that's a tough one.
They're using beef oil now, beef tallow they call it.
For the steak and change. And apparently Popeyes is going
to make a move towards this as well. I'm here
for it, dude. I want everything cooked in beef oil.
That's let's go. I'm sick of seed oils. I heard
seed oils are like the number one thing making people gay,
(16:32):
right now?
Speaker 2 (16:33):
Is that right? Yeah? In fact, do you ever think
about that? Maybe you just had too much canola.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
Maybe that was it. Or sunflower? Sunflower too right? They
put it in things that you don't think it would
be in.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
Yeah, but don't a lot of people eat sunflower seeds, okay,
this instead of waiting for it to become an oil,
they just eat it right out of its little shell.
Speaker 2 (16:50):
All right.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
I know this guy named Gino, and he explained it
to me. It's not that the seed oils are bad,
it's just that they go bad so quickly. You can
eat seeds, you can even have seed oil, but if
it's in a on your shelf and it's been there
for a month.
Speaker 3 (17:02):
It's snishing it up and making it hot. That's bad.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
Right. Yeah, you'll want to cook with cold seed oil,
do you? No? No, no, no, don't make it hot.
You'll be fine.
Speaker 1 (17:11):
Apparently seed oil just goes bad really quickly, but our
FDA didn't care about that idea. That's why I'm glad
we got our FK Junior. He's going to take all
the gay out of the Canola. Oh, that reminds me
a Nola Gayanola boy. That's a good segue. I didn't
even plan that one out.
Speaker 2 (17:26):
You mean Granola.
Speaker 1 (17:27):
No, and Nola Gay is in the news today. Does
everybody here get with that?
Speaker 2 (17:31):
Is?
Speaker 1 (17:32):
Why is everybody looking at me like like a like
you're a dog and I just rang the doorbell. You
must love World War two and have to understand. And
Nola Gay was a Boeing B twenty nine super fortress bomber.
It was named after Aola Gay Tibbets, the mother of
the pilot, Colonel Paul Tibbets, and on August sixth, nineteen
(17:53):
forty four, during the final stages of World War Two,
it became historic because he took that in, Nola Gay,
and they went in there and they trashed Nagasaki with it.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
It carried a bomb.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Right exactly for all the way from Roswell Army Airfield
where they keep the aliens in New Mexico, Yeah, and
all the way out to Japan. And the Japanese people
did not like a Nola Gay. Well, anyway, Elon Musk
has got this software that he uses to figure out
where all the DEI is at. And one of the
things it does is it searches for the word gay.
Oh boy, you probably already see where this is going.
Speaker 3 (18:25):
Yeah, so they've tried to remove the DEI stuff out
of government right using software, And I'm guessing the software
removed Nola gay from our history books now and we'll
never know.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
That was the name of the plane they carried one
of the moms.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
Right photos and social media posts made by the government.
The AAP is very mad about this. They said, there's
one hundred thousand images of a Nola gay that have
been purged from the database. Okay, well, two things. First
of all, how hard can it be to put them back?
Second of all, why are there one hundred thousand photos
of a Nola gay?
Speaker 2 (18:58):
You're a good question.
Speaker 1 (19:00):
What were they doing back in the forties where someone
was just sitting there. It's not a twenty two year
old with an iPhone in twenty twenty five. It was
the nineteen forties.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
One or two pictures plenty for people back in those days.
It was more than enough. Yeah, yeah, Billy, Yeah, you
get what I'm saying here.
Speaker 3 (19:14):
You can go back look at my parents or even
my grandparents' photo albums, because they actually have photo albums
with pictures stuck on pages that you flip through. It's
got them little squares on the corner, right, and that
holds a picture and you flip through there. And I
gotta tell you there's years where they got Christmas, the
entire Christmas holiday h on one page. Imagine that they
(19:38):
just needed one or two pictures and that's it.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
They didn't have thirty photos of each left, each picture
being opened. We got these days, there's drone.
Speaker 3 (19:46):
Aerial footage of people opening their Christmas presents now right.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Yeah, that's why I don't trust this report.
Speaker 1 (19:51):
The Ape associated press is mad at Trump because they
kicked He kicked them out of the White House press
briefings because they were what were they mad?
Speaker 2 (19:59):
I forgot the reason. It doesn't even matter at this point.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Something press, something with USAID or DEI or something like that,
and they're mad. So they published this article about how
a Nola gay, the history of Nola gay is being disrespected.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
And they had me right up until they made the
one hundred thousand images claims too much.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
Do you think they even had one hundred thousand images
of anything back then?
Speaker 2 (20:20):
No no IOC called Elon Musk unqualified.
Speaker 3 (20:24):
That would almost be as crazy as a bartender calling
a rocket scientist stupid.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
This is the Walton and Johnson Show.
You can never hate them enough, you know, Adam Adam
Chef Pelosi, they want you to hate them.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
They're begging you to hate him.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
Really seem hell bent on being hated by half of
the country.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
Adam Scheff is telling you, you radio listeners, screw you.
Speaker 4 (00:21):
We need to speak out, We need to be courageous.
They come after me all the time, Elon Musk and
Donald Trump. They called me a criminal, they called me
a trader. Their maga minions online come after me to
try to intimidate me, to create fear. I'll tell you
my response. My response to that is screw you and
(00:42):
the horse you rode in on.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
I believe him. And who is this talking?
Speaker 1 (00:45):
That's Adam Chef, one of the Well he's now the
senator in California, didn't he Oh yeah, he's not in
the house anymore.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
You guys. He's just want tough son of a bitch
right there. And he doesn't mind it if you hear
him say harsh words like screw him. He tough, old bastard.
He knows what's right. I think what democrats ask pop
him right in the mouth. They're listening too much to
every now intoor.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
She just want to ball.
Speaker 3 (01:09):
No, No, Billy, No, that Woman and Johnson Show does
not endorse that.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
No, that Hatfield Show does.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
No.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
Everybody on this show.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
What Billyett is saying right now is for satirical purposes.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
Only a novelty. He does not mean that. I want
our lawyers to make that clear for legal reasons. Billy
at Hatfield does not want.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
To pop it. Trying to keep your I'm trying to
keep you out of jail. You got to keep you
employed here, and I'm not sure why you're doing it.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
You want to pump it. You want Adam Schiff to
take his double wide? Have you seen his fat wife?
Where do you think she's gonna go? She lost some weight?
You know how much did she lose? Well, I mean
it's a pretty good amount for her. I'm sure she
doesn't like me talking about her weight on the radio.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
Is she like a buck ninety two ten? What are
we talking under? Two now? Really?
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Oh, that's that's progress. So that's exciting. Can you get
her out of the bathtub?
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Is my question? Did I put her into?
Speaker 4 (02:00):
Well?
Speaker 3 (02:00):
When you're look, you can't? I got you, okay? You
mean like on the bath night?
Speaker 1 (02:05):
You can't just hose her off every time she needs
to be clean, no cause that water's cold this time
of year. Yeah, she's gonna want to get in the tub.
And then what do you stop it? Well, how much
Crisco does that take?
Speaker 3 (02:15):
H Well, you know, we we don't buy it by
the tub anymore. We get it delivered by the palette.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
I guess it's puff dad. He went to prison.
Speaker 3 (02:23):
The cost of baby oil went down a little, you know,
supplying the ball. It's hard to get baby oil these days.
I don't know what chickens make it or something.
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Kansas City police confirmed there was no foul play in
the death of three friends found frozen in their buddies
backyard last year. I remember us covering this news story
and then totally forgetting about it.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
They said it was no foul play. I thought they
arrested somebody over the Okay, so it sounds like they
didn't do it on purpose. Now they're being charged within
voluntary manslaughter. They so does sound like some foul play
if people get arrested. A bunch of guys got together,
A bunch of white boys in Kansas City got together
and watched a football game, and they all fell asleep.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
And what's outside in the winter. Well, it sounds like
they did drugs, right.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
The friends, Ricky Johnson, aged thirty eight, David Harrington, age
thirty seven, Clayton mcgheiney thirty six, each died of feentanyl
and cocaine toxicity. I don't know a lot about cocaine
or fentanyl, but I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to
mix them. One of them is an upper, the others
a downer.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
And it could be one of those things. They didn't know.
Speaker 3 (03:25):
If Red Bull vodka is bad, that maybe they didn't
know that they were having Fittnel.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
You're fair, that's a fair point.
Speaker 3 (03:31):
Yeah, it seems to be stuff people are just slipping
into other drugs nowadays.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
The Walner Johnson Show doesn't endorse any illegal drug use.
But I gotta think if you're trying to play it safe,
nose an arm, that's the dangerous stuff. Stay away from
the nose, Stay away from the arm. Bags of the
dangerous drugs were found inside thirty nine year old Jordan
Willis's home, where the friends had been hanging out to
watch the Chiefs football game together January seventh, twenty twenty four.
(03:57):
Two days later, two days later, their bodies were found
out back.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
You know, nobody came looking for him, like the next day, Wow,
you're a cocaine and fentanyl user. Probably let's say they
didn't show up for work, but these guys probably didn't
have a job. Well, their loved ones finally wanted to
know what happened, and they're finally going to get answers.
Kansas City Police have concluded their investigation, announcing this week
that they were bringing in voluntary manslaughter charges against Willis
(04:23):
and his alleged drug dealer, forty two year old Ivory Carson.
Is Ivory white boy. It doesn't say if it's a
guy or a girl here, It doesn't I don't know Ivory.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
Here we go. It could be a white girl. But
I'm guessing that's a brother. I got a photo Ivory
here on the street. Is it looked like Jingles? Y'all?
Do remember that movie, do you so?
Speaker 3 (04:45):
White boy guy sent to prison for something he didn't do,
and he met a brother in their name of Jingles,
mister Bojangles, no whole different Jingles all together, and this
is Jingles. He was he was giving him a hard time,
all right. So they found that Thomson. I like movie,
how bad. Could it be if it's Tom Salad was
a good movie?
Speaker 2 (05:03):
Here was an innocent man. I can't imagine Tom Selleck
was in the kind of movie that would shock me.
Speaker 3 (05:08):
Jingles wouldn't a innocent bro. I'll tell you that too.
Somebody had to put a shield. Any mister, What is
it the white Why do white girls like TV shows
and movies about prison and murder so much?
Speaker 2 (05:20):
I don't know why it is, but I do find
it attractive.
Speaker 3 (05:23):
You know, a woman want to sit down and watch
one in hardcore scared straight life into prison kind of shows,
I'm down at her.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
You know who doesn't like watching that? Anyone who's ever
been arrested?
Speaker 2 (05:36):
They are gone to jail.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Am I the only person in this room that's ever
been in the backseat of a squad car.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
I know a couple of you gots. God know, Billy
ed you probably once or twice. Yeah, but it was nothing.
It was no big deal. I never had to put
the clothes on, like, I never got charged with anything
serious enough where they're like, here's your pink or black
and white striped outfit.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
Yeah, orange jumps, orange jump suit, right, orange.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
I never had to have you know, the caprice sun
or eat the blowny sandwich. That's not a euphemism, by
the way. It could be no, but it's not. I
never usually I was gone by morning. But uh, you know,
but having been in jail for a few hours, I
never once thought to myself, Man, I'd really like to
go watch some prison movies after this.
Speaker 3 (06:16):
Having spent a few hours in the backseat of police
cars on multiple occasions, so I will say it can
be a life changing experience.
Speaker 1 (06:25):
Wait, the way you say it makes it sound like
you wanted to be in the back seat of it.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
Well, yeah, it wasn't against my will or anything. It
wasn't a salt you know. It wasn't a like rape
or anything.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Is this like that Lana del Ray song where she
has sex with the cop in the back seat of
the car?
Speaker 2 (06:39):
Can we take a break? Is it too soon to
take a break? It's I gotta uh.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
I didn't even know they had gay cops. No, oh,
they never. What made you think there were gay cops?
Speaker 1 (06:51):
The thing you just said, the thing you just said
a second ago is what made me think that.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
You know, when there's a story about a lava nado,
don't think we need to be talking about no gay stuff.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
He's right.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
I thought we were going to talk about this an
hour ago. Okay, So there's a tornado that got mixed
up with some lava. It's kind of like Trenday Aragua
and MS thirteen doing a collaboration.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
What handles sound good? Where was this exactly?
Speaker 3 (07:14):
Well, that that Hawaii vacation you had planned to might
have gone hold if you were planning on visiting the
volcano over there.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
Car I just realized what this was. It's going up.
It's a volcano.
Speaker 3 (07:28):
To the.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
End of the world, end of the world. These are
prophecies from the end of time.
Speaker 3 (07:38):
And it's brought to you by Hey would Harvest one
of our favorite spot.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
All of our sponsors are great with goods and or.
Speaker 3 (07:46):
Services that make your life better, but he would Harvest
especially close to my heart.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
Yeah, if you're gonna die in a lava NATO rapture,
you might as well enjoy a little bit of calm
relief from the pro you find it.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
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Speaker 1 (08:02):
But remember you're paying too much money if you don't
use promo code W and J, W and J.
Speaker 3 (08:08):
Type it all out all five letter wand J. That's
bond that's the promo code.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
What do you got? So this wild scene was called
on video For those of you.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
Who think people just make this stuff up. Hot gases
and dangerous lava spun together into the air over a
freshly formed molten pool. Yeah, that's the lava at the
bottom of the volcano. And as it pours down the
side of the hill, see it pools up and then
(08:37):
you can see the lava splashing around and the volcanic
gases starts swirling and next thing you know, next thing
you know, lava nato a funnel that looks kind of
like a dust devil, you know, swirling around like that,
only it's swirling around over a pool of molten lava
(08:59):
then sucking it up into the NATO to make.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
It a Nato. That's prophecies from the end of town.
Speaker 3 (09:06):
Is that a scary end of time stuff right there?
Speaker 1 (09:08):
I wouldn't want to get suck to do a tornado,
but with the lava in there, Now here's my question.
What with the speed of the lava, the speed of
the tornado moving so quickly, does the lava turn into
stone as soon as it starts whirling around and then
it becomes like little rocks that start pelting at everybody.
A shotgun blast or something. Yeah, like a Dick Cheney
on a hunting trip with his buddy.
Speaker 3 (09:28):
It's like a superheated shotgun pellets. Now, if you heated
all the pellets up in your in your shotgun shell
to where they were glowing red but not quite liquid yet,
that's what you're getting hit with, buddy. That'll that'll hurt.
And here's a picture of some of it if you
if you just wanted to see it. You know, not
everybody can see this. Those of you paid extra for
(09:50):
your radio to have a camera on it.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Yeah, I bet more people wish they had done that,
you know, Yeah, I got the camera option. Right, I'll
describe what he just showed me. It looks like red
with yellow stuff. It looks like a Honestly, it kind
of looks like a Rothco painting.
Speaker 3 (10:04):
But it is a sea of I mean, I don't
know how big it is, but look there's a Yeah, wow,
that's a lot of lava.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
How much how much lava you've made here? That is there?
Speaker 1 (10:16):
More?
Speaker 2 (10:16):
Not care to mess? That is a lot of lava.
And I gotta tell you it's not the.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
Only volcano that's going off right now. They've got they've
got earthquakes and volcanoes going off regularly now in the
Ring of Fire area, which is huge, it's like, you know,
big part of the globe. I noticed this has been
happening once a month lately. It's like once a month lately.
There's just a few.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
Days, several days set aside where this hot red lava
starts bursting out.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
Of the earth and like the Earth has to just
like get it out, yeah, and get rid of it,
and just for that one. It's not the whole month.
Speaker 1 (10:52):
It's just really like six days issue, like not even
a full week. And when that happens, it's like, boy,
get out of the way. But I can't think of
anything to compare.
Speaker 2 (10:59):
It to now. But you can.
Speaker 3 (11:01):
Scientists say they can kind of predict when they're coming
now because uh, right before this eruptions, there's apparently the
Earth that starts rumbling or grumbling or or just getting
kind of just testy.
Speaker 2 (11:15):
Ye know, And it usually starts to crave chocolate right.
Speaker 3 (11:17):
Right right now, I ask it under the name of
the monotheistic god Brahma, Amen, and a woman Wilton and
Johnson's some good news this morning. I know the stock
market been sucking lately, but the good news is in.
It looks like my idea of h gray ashes for
(11:40):
Catholics that uh you know, ain't white idea, that my
idea about the gray ashes for black people is really
catching on, getting a lot of positive email, hot good
spin about it.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
You know.
Speaker 3 (11:55):
When I talked to the the people down there at
the uh what you call that copyright place, they said
they never heard nothing this great in a while. So
it looked like I'm probably on my way to fabulous
wealth and riches beyond all compare.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
You're gonna copyright white ashes or gray ashes?
Speaker 3 (12:13):
No, it's done, It's done. They went ahead and said, yeah,
I got there.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
It's a natural phenomenon. They called it brilliant. You know,
but I get that a lote. I feel like they didn't.
I feel like you're making this up.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
It's all taken care of it. Okay, Well, you know,
why would you lie so great? Point eight sixty six.
I believe you you're telling the truth. I'm saying I
don't think you're lying to me.
Speaker 3 (12:35):
And people email about me too, they said, looks like
Billy Ed was right.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
I'm always right, you know.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
You know he saves those emails and prints him out
and he shows them to pre Lane when you send them.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
Sure, he has a stack of them at home every time.
Speaker 1 (12:47):
Yeah, he spent an hour the other day trying to
get the copy photocopy.
Speaker 3 (12:50):
Of machine interrupted. My Billy ads right moment. Huh, okay,
tell us why you're right, Billy. This lady says a
broken hip on an old person is pretty much a
death sentence. Yeah, a fractory hip is an emergency surgery.
Orthopedics was my thing back in the day. She says, uh,
(13:10):
we fix people so they could ambulate. I don't know
what that means, but anyway, she's right broken, and there's
a medical professional here. Obviously, broken hip is pretty much
death sentence for old people.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
So there you go. I forget why we brought this
up earlier. You said, if an old lady breaks her hip,
you gotta put her down. Yeah, you know, my mom's
staying at my house right now. She's got a fake hip,
of fake nee, her shoulders, fake, everything's fake.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
When you I'd like hardly eaving your mom anymore. I
know she's like RoboCop yesterday. I think robo mom. Yesterday
one of my coaches, Bob. Coach Bob was saying, you
know your mom's in town, you got to bring her
in and lift some weights and stuff. I thought, I
don't think that's going to happen.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
I just have a My mom's a beautiful person, but
she doesn't strike me as the kind of person that's gonna.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Squat this week. I no, no squatting. No, absolutely not.
Speaker 3 (13:56):
And like we told you yesterday, benching is in like
nineteen ninety this old Now everything is like full body.
If you can't do a chin up that ends with
the bar at your thighs, then you're not really even
doing a chin up, are you? When I do chin ups,
what I like to do is like propel myself up
over the bar and do a handstand with the bar
(14:16):
and then and then I swing back down.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
Who doesn't swing up? Handstand swing? I enjoy that. How
they call it, they like it's it's called out like.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
They're called kenny chin ups. That's what I yeah, that's
what I call them. I heard it called a muscle up.
They're called kins, but you spell with the k. Experts
say San Francisco is sinking fast and could be unsalvageable
if something isn't done soon, Well, won't.
Speaker 3 (14:39):
The ocean water wipe away all the human feces on
the sidewalk though ocean water? I thought they were talking
about the forty nine ers when I read this, the sinking.
The sinking, Oh they mean the earth? I thought they
was about the football, just the city. Oh, I'm confused.
I thought, Oh, my bad. Well, and I would the
team be sinking? Didn't they have a bad season? Well,
then I don't get no. If they don't get somebody players,
(15:01):
that's it. They Toulson the good ones aside, apparently they're cheap.
They got tight with that money. They don't want to
pay anybody in one hundred and fifty two hundred million
dollars and that's insane.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Well, apparently there's a defensive coach available now if that
could help him out. The Denver Broncos just fired defensive
assistant Mike Wilhoyt ten days after he was arrested. All
he did was punch a cop at the Denver Airport.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
Well, at least it wasn't something over his coaching skills.
So if he goes to another team, and I wonder why,
why Broncos cut you loose. Oh, it wasn't about my coaching.
It's just, you know, punching cops. I've spent a lot
of time in that airport. I think almost everyone on
this radio show has been arrested at that airport, and
we've all wanted to punch somebody. Usually not a cop, though,
(15:44):
it's just people. Sometimes it's those people that don't walk
on the moving sidewalk.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
Yeah, I want to punch them. You know what, I'm curious.
I might go eat lunch at the airport later today.
That sounds like a good idea, right there. They've got
a stick and shake. It's the only one in our city,
and it's at the airport, and they're now on.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
This side of the TSA or on the other side.
Speaker 3 (16:05):
You got to go in, so you have to buy
a ticket to something so you can have a boarding pass,
or you can't get past the TSA to go eat lunch.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
Well it's that or get killed by seed oils. I
mean you tell me, yeah, Yeah, that's a tough one.
They're using beef oil now, beef tallow they call it.
For the steak and change. And apparently Popeyes is going
to make a move towards this as well. I'm here
for it, dude. I want everything cooked in beef oil.
That's let's go. I'm sick of seed oils. I heard
seed oils are like the number one thing making people gay,
(16:32):
right now?
Speaker 2 (16:33):
Is that right? Yeah? In fact, do you ever think
about that? Maybe you just had too much canola.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
Maybe that was it. Or sunflower? Sunflower too right? They
put it in things that you don't think it would
be in.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
Yeah, but don't a lot of people eat sunflower seeds, okay,
this instead of waiting for it to become an oil,
they just eat it right out of its little shell.
Speaker 2 (16:50):
All right.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
I know this guy named Gino, and he explained it
to me. It's not that the seed oils are bad,
it's just that they go bad so quickly. You can
eat seeds, you can even have seed oil, but if
it's in a on your shelf and it's been there
for a month.
Speaker 3 (17:02):
It's snishing it up and making it hot. That's bad.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
Right. Yeah, you'll want to cook with cold seed oil,
do you? No? No, no, no, don't make it hot.
You'll be fine.
Speaker 1 (17:11):
Apparently seed oil just goes bad really quickly, but our
FDA didn't care about that idea. That's why I'm glad
we got our FK Junior. He's going to take all
the gay out of the Canola. Oh, that reminds me
a Nola Gayanola boy. That's a good segue. I didn't
even plan that one out.
Speaker 2 (17:26):
You mean Granola.
Speaker 1 (17:27):
No, and Nola Gay is in the news today. Does
everybody here get with that?
Speaker 2 (17:31):
Is?
Speaker 1 (17:32):
Why is everybody looking at me like like a like
you're a dog and I just rang the doorbell. You
must love World War two and have to understand. And
Nola Gay was a Boeing B twenty nine super fortress bomber.
It was named after Aola Gay Tibbets, the mother of
the pilot, Colonel Paul Tibbets, and on August sixth, nineteen
(17:53):
forty four, during the final stages of World War Two,
it became historic because he took that in, Nola Gay,
and they went in there and they trashed Nagasaki with it.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
It carried a bomb.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Right exactly for all the way from Roswell Army Airfield
where they keep the aliens in New Mexico, Yeah, and
all the way out to Japan. And the Japanese people
did not like a Nola Gay. Well, anyway, Elon Musk
has got this software that he uses to figure out
where all the DEI is at. And one of the
things it does is it searches for the word gay.
Oh boy, you probably already see where this is going.
Speaker 3 (18:25):
Yeah, so they've tried to remove the DEI stuff out
of government right using software, And I'm guessing the software
removed Nola gay from our history books now and we'll
never know.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
That was the name of the plane they carried one
of the moms.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
Right photos and social media posts made by the government.
The AAP is very mad about this. They said, there's
one hundred thousand images of a Nola gay that have
been purged from the database. Okay, well, two things. First
of all, how hard can it be to put them back?
Second of all, why are there one hundred thousand photos
of a Nola gay?
Speaker 2 (18:58):
You're a good question.
Speaker 1 (19:00):
What were they doing back in the forties where someone
was just sitting there. It's not a twenty two year
old with an iPhone in twenty twenty five. It was
the nineteen forties.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
One or two pictures plenty for people back in those days.
It was more than enough. Yeah, yeah, Billy, Yeah, you
get what I'm saying here.
Speaker 3 (19:14):
You can go back look at my parents or even
my grandparents' photo albums, because they actually have photo albums
with pictures stuck on pages that you flip through. It's
got them little squares on the corner, right, and that
holds a picture and you flip through there. And I
gotta tell you there's years where they got Christmas, the
entire Christmas holiday h on one page. Imagine that they
(19:38):
just needed one or two pictures and that's it.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
They didn't have thirty photos of each left, each picture
being opened. We got these days, there's drone.
Speaker 3 (19:46):
Aerial footage of people opening their Christmas presents now right.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Yeah, that's why I don't trust this report.
Speaker 1 (19:51):
The Ape associated press is mad at Trump because they
kicked He kicked them out of the White House press
briefings because they were what were they mad?
Speaker 2 (19:59):
I forgot the reason. It doesn't even matter at this point.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Something press, something with USAID or DEI or something like that,
and they're mad. So they published this article about how
a Nola gay, the history of Nola gay is being disrespected.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
And they had me right up until they made the
one hundred thousand images claims too much.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
Do you think they even had one hundred thousand images
of anything back then?
Speaker 2 (20:20):
No no IOC called Elon Musk unqualified.
Speaker 3 (20:24):
That would almost be as crazy as a bartender calling
a rocket scientist stupid.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
This is the Walton and Johnson Show.
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