Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Oh yeah, I forgot. We're gonna give credit to Babylon
B for that.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Oh yeah, we talld to choke on Babylon BEH.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
That's true. What was it? It was like five minutes ago.
Nobody remembers it.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
It was about beef tallow or seed oil or something.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
Seed oil. Yeah, that's what killed JFK. That's pretty funny.
That was on the Babylon But you understand that. Why
RFK Junior is you know Hill been on stopping seed
oils because sure killed his uncle. Yeah uncle. Uh. Babylon
B also put this headline out. Maybe it's bad timing.
Tesla announced a new cyber truck model, the Fear. Oh
(00:35):
my god, well, speaking of me, nobody's nobody's doing that.
It's not a real thing.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Speaking of beef tallow and seed oils and stuff, Steak
and Shake, the National cheeseburger chain was recently using an
old English font for some of their social media posts
that some have suggested looks a lot like the font
used by Nazis during World War Two. And during this
time they've been bragging about how they're replacing the seed
canola with beef tallow and they've been retweeting right wing
(01:03):
social media influencers that have been eating the beef tallow
and so someone called him out for this. They said
that font you're using as a Nazi font, and they said, no,
it's not. And then someone from Steak and Shake went
through their social media accounts and deleted every single poe.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
But just in case, they're the ones who, you know,
got one of the guys from Fox News come do
a special report. The President ended up going over and
sitting down and eating some of those fries.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
All right, So mister oh, I guess you'd be the right.
Gud asked this question too, if a racist made a cheeseburger,
but it was the most delicious cheeseburger, the fries, the
perfectly cooked season curly fries with the best dipping sauce,
and an Oreo milkshake or whatever it is. Oreo, I
didn't see it's so easy cookies and cream.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
Uh huh, yeah, yeah, I hear what you think.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
Okay, whatever you pick, banana whatever.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
If oiol you know, racist, was to make me a
delicious burger, would I enjoy it? Do you care that
he's racist?
Speaker 2 (02:06):
You know, if I cared, I would have stoved to death.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
By now you realized how many racist burgers I've had
in my life, all of them.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
You know, I'm a music enthusiast and people are constantly
telling me, but Kenny, the lead singer of that band,
is a raging socialist.
Speaker 1 (02:20):
Yeah. I don't care. Yeah, because it's like saying I'll
only watch TV shows or movies with conservative thinking people
in it. Well, then you might as well sell your
TV cancel all your subscriptions because that's not happening.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
And then musically, what would you have? Ted nugent, kid
rock and not a lot and country music? What's left?
Kanye West even that is like, no, that guy's lost
his mind recently. I mean lately, we haven't even been
talking about it because nobody cares anymore. But Kanye is
like worse than ever posting swastikas.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
It's gotten so ridiculous with him, it's it's just not
even worth mentioning anymore.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
He's just going off the deep end a long time.
Doesn't anybody love him enough to like stop him?
Speaker 1 (03:03):
I don't think so.
Speaker 2 (03:04):
Hey, dude, stop posting swastikas. You spent twenty years making
yourself one of the most influential music producers and recording
artists in American history. And now in a week you've
pretty much convinced everybody to throw all their Kanye West
stuff away and never look back.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
I don't know how you did that. You know all
these problems that we're noticing every day, and comment know,
won't a mount to a hill of beans? Once Yellowstone erupts?
Speaker 3 (03:29):
Oh God, here we go again, like the not the
TV show obviously, no, no, the Yellowstone Caldera, the massive
volcano hiding oh underground at Yellowstone.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
Oh, I get what you're doing? He Oh, I forgot
I was doing Stone seven times? Is the end of
the world? These are prophecies from the end of time.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
It's another Walton Johnson show sign of the Apocalypse, and
it's proudly brought to you by.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
Where would you like to eat if it was going
to be your last meal before the apocalypse?
Speaker 2 (04:04):
I mean, obviously Dragos Restaurants dot Com. For one thing,
they don't use the old English font That makes me
wonder if they're pandering to racists.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
And it's getting close to breakfast time. The Dragos in Metay. Oh,
if you're close enough, I highly recommend it.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
If you're in Jackson, Mississippi, or Shreveport, Bosure or Lake
Trial anywhere near those places. Get yourself to a Drago's restaurant.
Enjoy the greatest chargirled oysters that have ever touched your lips.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
There you go, All right, where are we going today?
Yellowstone called a brand new volcanic vent has opened up
in Yellowstone.
Speaker 2 (04:37):
They keep an eye on this kind of stuff. It's
a the vent's brand new.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
And they think it might be a sign of something
worse to come. The the volcano, basically that is Yellowstone.
Think about how big that is. The the opening of
the top of the volcano, which is basically you know, underground,
is covered up with Yellowstone, the national park. So it's
(05:03):
not just a clever name. No, yeah, the stone is
really yellow that some of it is, yeah, sulfur and whatnot.
But yeah, they said south. Driving south from Mammoth Hot
Springs towards Norris Geyser Basin, you've probably never been there.
You don't know. No, let's go. This week, scientists noticed
a billowing steam column where there wasn't none before. An
(05:28):
eagle eye scientists notified the park. They went over and looked. Yep,
new activity. They could they could build a put a
sign up build a walkway over to it, and have
something else for you to go look at it Yellowstone.
Of course, while you're looking at all this, you know,
mud pots bubbling up, and guys are shooting up and surf.
You're all the one hundred thousands, you know, two hundred
(05:49):
degree steam vents and all this kind of stuff. Just
know you're standing in the middle of a volcano. Okay,
it's just that ground has covered it up for now,
But anytime it walks too it can just rip that
ground apart and start blasting. Yeah, but the way you.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
Describe it, it sounds like you're talking about the Hemi
engine on your buddy's new automobile. You got to sound
more menacing billy. Yet, I don't think you're convincing people.
This is serious. I'm trying not to scare people too much.
I mean, just talking about the volcano itself is scary enough.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
No, No, we put the music on. We're all in.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
I'm scary here. You gotta do it, Yeah, you got to, yeah,
all right, show me what you mean?
Speaker 1 (06:26):
All right?
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Right now, the Yellowstone National Park treble's are bruin deep
below the Earth's surface. Unsuspecting people don't realize that very soon, kabam,
they could be dead. Oh my god, you're scared the
life out of me. Body parts flying everywhere, animals running
in all directions, trees and bushes being disintegrated by the
molten lava.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
And these scientists are all rushing to the scene because
they heard there's a new hole to investigate. You know
how guys.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Are Look, I get it, I know a new hole.
I'm fascinated by that.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Oh goodness.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Yeah, for most guys in their whole life, you only
get to experience the four holes. Many a fifth hole
that'd be crazy, you know.
Speaker 1 (07:05):
Yeah, that was because of that that hooker that said
she'd keep an eye out for you.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
Wait, what what do you? I feel like we're talking
about two different things all the time.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
I don't, all right.
Speaker 2 (07:15):
So, after a long absence, the astronauts splashed down safely yesterday.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
And the dolphins were there to welcome them home.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
It was adorable, those dolphins, just the cutest pie. There's
always a lot to celebrate when we can welcome astronauts
home again safely.
Speaker 1 (07:30):
Didn't you say dolphins was real hornyh Yeah, the dolphins
like like sex with the humans and something, And didn't
these dolphins probably heard on the news these humans have
been up there for nine months, ten months. I'm like that.
Sure dolphins had to expect these humans. Was ready for
them get going right now? They were amorous, Yeah, they
were ready, ready for love making. They were all they were.
(07:51):
All it didn't happen was that they had a drone
flying overhead and they watched the dolphins playfully splash about,
but no physical encounters with the dolphins.
Speaker 2 (08:02):
How far out are we in society now before you
start seeing parades defending the rights of inner species sexual orientation?
Speaker 1 (08:10):
Not three weeks?
Speaker 2 (08:11):
I mean I got a maybe at the most three
weeks anyway.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
Welcome to the prediction by John Walton. Sure, welcome home
to the astronauts, though, welcome back. You stayed in space
way too long. Welcome back.
Speaker 4 (08:31):
Now you can pee without a section cup, Son, he's here,
won't be constantly floating around, and your wrinkles will come.
Speaker 1 (08:41):
Back because gravity's.
Speaker 4 (08:43):
Bringing you down.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
Dude.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
If that we leave you, dude, if that we leave
none months before we see I am before we see well.
Speaker 4 (08:53):
We tease them a lot because they need a measle shot.
Welcome back, welcome Welcome back, Welcome.
Speaker 5 (09:02):
Back, And what I don't like is if the business
is true that you left your moms in the hood,
somebody goes smoke that you you don't leave your moms nowhere.
You have money and you left your mom's there. You know,
you're sick to my stomach.
Speaker 1 (09:18):
Fan.
Speaker 5 (09:18):
But if it's not true, sure, he's just talking.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
Stay tuned for more.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Waltman Johnson.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
Fine, I'll run the Crescent City or whatever.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
It's you're gonna You're gonna have to christl City Classic.
It's the Triple C.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
Apparently people have been writing letters and some of these
letters are challenging my manhood.
Speaker 1 (09:35):
Oh yes, definitely a lot of email.
Speaker 2 (09:40):
From It's the Walton Johnson email. Ben proudly brought to
you by the Walton Johnson smartphone app, which is now
available for both Android and and iPhone. It's available in
the Google Play Store and the Apple App Store.
Speaker 1 (09:54):
And now if you tried it before with the Google
thing last week or something, don't work, try it again.
We've busted our ass. I'd get that thing working.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
You would not believe how much time I spent trying
to get the app back into the app store.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
They weighed unnecessarily long them out they really didn't want
it in there.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Well, anyway, downloaded today and of course I love WJ
dot com for all the latest March What do we
got today in the email?
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Then Kyle rode in and Kyle short and sweet and
to the point, which is the way we like our emails.
You tell Kenny he can't be a runner and a pussy.
Sure you can't. You're gonna have to pick one, bro, No,
you could be both of those things. If you're a
not much of a runner, then are you No? No,
I run. I'm a runner for sure. And Bubba has
solved the racist bridge problems that we have. You know,
(10:40):
we got all these racist bridges in the country. That's
what Mayor Pete says. Yeah, he says, all you gotta
do is back another bus up to the other end
of the bridge. Okay, so the bus pulls up to
the bridge. Black people just loaded down on that bus
and they're trying to get to the beach. And then
the bus won't go under the bridge because it's too low.
Too low. Yeah, all you gotta do get off that bus,
(11:01):
walk to the other end of the bridge, get on
the other bus that's waiting for him there and shuttle
it right along. You see how that worked.
Speaker 2 (11:08):
You know, he's right. I mean, as silly and stupid
as this whole thing is. If that's what's preventing black
people from getting to the public pool.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
That's the biggest issue they've got to deal with. Then
problem solved.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
You're telling me it's impossible for them to just switch
buses at the bridge. Okay, get out of here, you
walk eight feet over there.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
No, he's right. That solves the whole problem immediately. I
don't know why we all didn't think of that. Now.
I just think now I'm.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
Beginning to think all these racist people from the past
just wanted to be racist.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
It's almost like they're just finding things to be upset
about and pointing a finger and screaming racist just because
they don't like the person. Yeah, well that shouldn't shouldn't
be that way.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
Do you guys like a good, feel good story? You
guys like feeling good?
Speaker 1 (11:50):
Feel good? Is it an animal story? It involves a
three year old boy, Okay, as long as nothing bad happens.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
A three year old in Colorado. He saved his great
grandma after she fell last month and hit her head.
It happened next to you some steps outside her home
and her phone was in her car, so she told
him to be brave and go get it for her.
Here's Sharon Lewis talking about her great grandson Bridger.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
I'm sorry, what where's this taking Blazier again?
Speaker 2 (12:19):
It says his name is Bridger, right, that's a kid's name.
Bridge is a name. Yeah, we're just gonna accept that
and move on with a news story like that.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
It's been a last name for years. Somebody like to
turned it into a first name. Now, all right, this
was in Colorado. Here's the great grandma of Bridge Bridger
because that's a name. Yeah, go ahead play the audio.
Oh sorry, it's the computer's not working right, keating them
all again. Thanks.
Speaker 6 (12:41):
We were walking up the sidewalk and it was dark
because the porchlight wasn't on, and I tripped over something
and fell, and then we started hollering for the neighbor,
but that didn't work. I said, so, Bridger, you're going
to have to be a big boy and go out
to the car and get Gg's throne. And he said,
(13:05):
it's really dark.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
Gg.
Speaker 6 (13:07):
I said it'll be okay. Jesus will help you. Don't
be afraid. Well, yeah, almost scared. I call him my
hero and he says, no, gg I'm Bridger.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
Oh God.
Speaker 2 (13:23):
When I was a little kid, my parents used to
tell me if you're if you keep behaving this way,
you're gonna have to live with the consequences.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
Jesus is watching you.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
And then I would say, I don't want to live
with the consequences. I want to live with you.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
Guys. Ah, that's cute, kitty. Uh, how come you're not
still lovable like that? I know I haven't been cuting
in a long time. Bridge Bridge.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
Is it possible they named him Bridger as a tribute
to all the people that have been impressed by a
racist Bridge.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
That's what I was assuming they did it. Art could
have had something to do with Jim Bridger, the mountain man,
who they named about half of Wyoming or Montana over. Yeah,
is that right?
Speaker 2 (13:57):
If I go to Wyoming, I'm going to see a
lot of stuff called Bridger just everywhere. Yeah, they probably
got a bridge a bridge, there's a you know that
you could You can't have a Bridger Bridger is.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
A natural park, Bridger mountain range, Bridger real estate. I'm
sure there's a Bridger refrigeration repair Company. Now, I mean
it's ever God forbid. Somebody asks for permission to bridge
or bridge? Hey, do you know where the bridge is at?
Which bridge? Bridger Bridge? Bridger No? No, the bridge bridge?
You mean the one named after that little three year
old hero. I guess, so maybe next time. Congratulations, young man.
(14:31):
That's a good move for him.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
All right, And now what happens when you take the
song Owner of a Lonely Heart and combine combine it
with let It Whip by the dazz Band and Ronnie
James Dio's Rainbow in the Dark. You probably don't want
to know, but you're about to find out. Oh my, it.
Speaker 5 (15:27):
Is.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Depending on your musical taste, this says either one of
the greatest things you've ever heard, or it's kind of
like the musical version of Tracy Morgan throwing up on
the basketball court.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
I don't actually know. I don't actually know the song
let It Whip by the Dazzba. I don't know that,
but it sound like they put it sound by it
in advo saying crack that whip?
Speaker 1 (15:46):
Is that? Yeah? They did that too. Yeah, it's in
both songs. No, I'm not sure about the first one.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
How many songs were there back in the day about
whipping people? Oh?
Speaker 1 (15:55):
Yeah, you don't want to know.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
Are we supposed to be that a long time ago
people were getting whipped so frequent only that they needed
multiple songs.
Speaker 1 (16:01):
Written about it?
Speaker 2 (16:02):
Yes, that's who would ever believe that? No, men getting
whipped to the point where they need pop songs about it.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
I can't think of.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
One example from history if somebody getting whipped so much
that they needed to make a song about it?
Speaker 1 (16:15):
Is that right? Not one? Yeah? Not one? What about you? Mister? Oh?
Could you think I got one? Oh? I think I do?
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Oh, okay, well you don't want to know. No, I
believe you. March madness? You guys into it?
Speaker 1 (16:26):
Or is it? Oh? Is it that time again? Already?
Speaker 2 (16:30):
It's that time again? March Madness began with a final
seconds coming. Well, you know what, why don't we do
after this? I think after this we could do our
sports report. We're gonna get gay for space again, so
stick around for that. And criminals are stupid. We got
a report on that coming up in just a little bit.
And I am told that somebody has been asked to
leave the cabin of an airplane because of their unruly
(16:52):
behavior I know sounds like from Texas Justice to me
Speaker 1 (16:56):
Lockett, Walton and Johnson Radio Network,
Oh yeah, I forgot. We're gonna give credit to Babylon
B for that.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Oh yeah, we talld to choke on Babylon BEH.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
That's true. What was it? It was like five minutes ago.
Nobody remembers it.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
It was about beef tallow or seed oil or something.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
Seed oil. Yeah, that's what killed JFK. That's pretty funny.
That was on the Babylon But you understand that. Why
RFK Junior is you know Hill been on stopping seed
oils because sure killed his uncle. Yeah uncle. Uh. Babylon
B also put this headline out. Maybe it's bad timing.
Tesla announced a new cyber truck model, the Fear. Oh
(00:35):
my god, well, speaking of me, nobody's nobody's doing that.
It's not a real thing.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Speaking of beef tallow and seed oils and stuff, Steak
and Shake, the National cheeseburger chain was recently using an
old English font for some of their social media posts
that some have suggested looks a lot like the font
used by Nazis during World War Two. And during this
time they've been bragging about how they're replacing the seed
canola with beef tallow and they've been retweeting right wing
(01:03):
social media influencers that have been eating the beef tallow
and so someone called him out for this. They said
that font you're using as a Nazi font, and they said, no,
it's not. And then someone from Steak and Shake went
through their social media accounts and deleted every single poe.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
But just in case, they're the ones who, you know,
got one of the guys from Fox News come do
a special report. The President ended up going over and
sitting down and eating some of those fries.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
All right, So mister oh, I guess you'd be the right.
Gud asked this question too, if a racist made a cheeseburger,
but it was the most delicious cheeseburger, the fries, the
perfectly cooked season curly fries with the best dipping sauce,
and an Oreo milkshake or whatever it is. Oreo, I
didn't see it's so easy cookies and cream.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
Uh huh, yeah, yeah, I hear what you think.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
Okay, whatever you pick, banana whatever.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
If oiol you know, racist, was to make me a
delicious burger, would I enjoy it? Do you care that
he's racist?
Speaker 2 (02:06):
You know, if I cared, I would have stoved to death.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
By now you realized how many racist burgers I've had
in my life, all of them.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
You know, I'm a music enthusiast and people are constantly
telling me, but Kenny, the lead singer of that band,
is a raging socialist.
Speaker 1 (02:20):
Yeah. I don't care. Yeah, because it's like saying I'll
only watch TV shows or movies with conservative thinking people
in it. Well, then you might as well sell your
TV cancel all your subscriptions because that's not happening.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
And then musically, what would you have? Ted nugent, kid
rock and not a lot and country music? What's left?
Kanye West even that is like, no, that guy's lost
his mind recently. I mean lately, we haven't even been
talking about it because nobody cares anymore. But Kanye is
like worse than ever posting swastikas.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
It's gotten so ridiculous with him, it's it's just not
even worth mentioning anymore.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
He's just going off the deep end a long time.
Doesn't anybody love him enough to like stop him?
Speaker 1 (03:03):
I don't think so.
Speaker 2 (03:04):
Hey, dude, stop posting swastikas. You spent twenty years making
yourself one of the most influential music producers and recording
artists in American history. And now in a week you've
pretty much convinced everybody to throw all their Kanye West
stuff away and never look back.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
I don't know how you did that. You know all
these problems that we're noticing every day, and comment know,
won't a mount to a hill of beans? Once Yellowstone erupts?
Speaker 3 (03:29):
Oh God, here we go again, like the not the
TV show obviously, no, no, the Yellowstone Caldera, the massive
volcano hiding oh underground at Yellowstone.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
Oh, I get what you're doing? He Oh, I forgot
I was doing Stone seven times? Is the end of
the world? These are prophecies from the end of time.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
It's another Walton Johnson show sign of the Apocalypse, and
it's proudly brought to you by.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
Where would you like to eat if it was going
to be your last meal before the apocalypse?
Speaker 2 (04:04):
I mean, obviously Dragos Restaurants dot Com. For one thing,
they don't use the old English font That makes me
wonder if they're pandering to racists.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
And it's getting close to breakfast time. The Dragos in Metay. Oh,
if you're close enough, I highly recommend it.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
If you're in Jackson, Mississippi, or Shreveport, Bosure or Lake
Trial anywhere near those places. Get yourself to a Drago's restaurant.
Enjoy the greatest chargirled oysters that have ever touched your lips.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
There you go, All right, where are we going today?
Yellowstone called a brand new volcanic vent has opened up
in Yellowstone.
Speaker 2 (04:37):
They keep an eye on this kind of stuff. It's
a the vent's brand new.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
And they think it might be a sign of something
worse to come. The the volcano, basically that is Yellowstone.
Think about how big that is. The the opening of
the top of the volcano, which is basically you know, underground,
is covered up with Yellowstone, the national park. So it's
(05:03):
not just a clever name. No, yeah, the stone is
really yellow that some of it is, yeah, sulfur and whatnot.
But yeah, they said south. Driving south from Mammoth Hot
Springs towards Norris Geyser Basin, you've probably never been there.
You don't know. No, let's go. This week, scientists noticed
a billowing steam column where there wasn't none before. An
(05:28):
eagle eye scientists notified the park. They went over and looked. Yep,
new activity. They could they could build a put a
sign up build a walkway over to it, and have
something else for you to go look at it Yellowstone.
Of course, while you're looking at all this, you know,
mud pots bubbling up, and guys are shooting up and surf.
You're all the one hundred thousands, you know, two hundred
(05:49):
degree steam vents and all this kind of stuff. Just
know you're standing in the middle of a volcano. Okay,
it's just that ground has covered it up for now,
But anytime it walks too it can just rip that
ground apart and start blasting. Yeah, but the way you.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
Describe it, it sounds like you're talking about the Hemi
engine on your buddy's new automobile. You got to sound
more menacing billy. Yet, I don't think you're convincing people.
This is serious. I'm trying not to scare people too much.
I mean, just talking about the volcano itself is scary enough.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
No, No, we put the music on. We're all in.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
I'm scary here. You gotta do it, Yeah, you got to, yeah,
all right, show me what you mean?
Speaker 1 (06:26):
All right?
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Right now, the Yellowstone National Park treble's are bruin deep
below the Earth's surface. Unsuspecting people don't realize that very soon, kabam,
they could be dead. Oh my god, you're scared the
life out of me. Body parts flying everywhere, animals running
in all directions, trees and bushes being disintegrated by the
molten lava.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
And these scientists are all rushing to the scene because
they heard there's a new hole to investigate. You know
how guys.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Are Look, I get it, I know a new hole.
I'm fascinated by that.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Oh goodness.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Yeah, for most guys in their whole life, you only
get to experience the four holes. Many a fifth hole
that'd be crazy, you know.
Speaker 1 (07:05):
Yeah, that was because of that that hooker that said
she'd keep an eye out for you.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
Wait, what what do you? I feel like we're talking
about two different things all the time.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
I don't, all right.
Speaker 2 (07:15):
So, after a long absence, the astronauts splashed down safely yesterday.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
And the dolphins were there to welcome them home.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
It was adorable, those dolphins, just the cutest pie. There's
always a lot to celebrate when we can welcome astronauts
home again safely.
Speaker 1 (07:30):
Didn't you say dolphins was real hornyh Yeah, the dolphins
like like sex with the humans and something, And didn't
these dolphins probably heard on the news these humans have
been up there for nine months, ten months. I'm like that.
Sure dolphins had to expect these humans. Was ready for
them get going right now? They were amorous, Yeah, they
were ready, ready for love making. They were all they were.
(07:51):
All it didn't happen was that they had a drone
flying overhead and they watched the dolphins playfully splash about,
but no physical encounters with the dolphins.
Speaker 2 (08:02):
How far out are we in society now before you
start seeing parades defending the rights of inner species sexual orientation?
Speaker 1 (08:10):
Not three weeks?
Speaker 2 (08:11):
I mean I got a maybe at the most three
weeks anyway.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
Welcome to the prediction by John Walton. Sure, welcome home
to the astronauts, though, welcome back. You stayed in space
way too long. Welcome back.
Speaker 4 (08:31):
Now you can pee without a section cup, Son, he's here,
won't be constantly floating around, and your wrinkles will come.
Speaker 1 (08:41):
Back because gravity's.
Speaker 4 (08:43):
Bringing you down.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
Dude.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
If that we leave you, dude, if that we leave
none months before we see I am before we see well.
Speaker 4 (08:53):
We tease them a lot because they need a measle shot.
Welcome back, welcome Welcome back, Welcome.
Speaker 5 (09:02):
Back, And what I don't like is if the business
is true that you left your moms in the hood,
somebody goes smoke that you you don't leave your moms nowhere.
You have money and you left your mom's there. You know,
you're sick to my stomach.
Speaker 1 (09:18):
Fan.
Speaker 5 (09:18):
But if it's not true, sure, he's just talking.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
Stay tuned for more.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Waltman Johnson.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
Fine, I'll run the Crescent City or whatever.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
It's you're gonna You're gonna have to christl City Classic.
It's the Triple C.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
Apparently people have been writing letters and some of these
letters are challenging my manhood.
Speaker 1 (09:35):
Oh yes, definitely a lot of email.
Speaker 2 (09:40):
From It's the Walton Johnson email. Ben proudly brought to
you by the Walton Johnson smartphone app, which is now
available for both Android and and iPhone. It's available in
the Google Play Store and the Apple App Store.
Speaker 1 (09:54):
And now if you tried it before with the Google
thing last week or something, don't work, try it again.
We've busted our ass. I'd get that thing working.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
You would not believe how much time I spent trying
to get the app back into the app store.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
They weighed unnecessarily long them out they really didn't want
it in there.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Well, anyway, downloaded today and of course I love WJ
dot com for all the latest March What do we
got today in the email?
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Then Kyle rode in and Kyle short and sweet and
to the point, which is the way we like our emails.
You tell Kenny he can't be a runner and a pussy.
Sure you can't. You're gonna have to pick one, bro, No,
you could be both of those things. If you're a
not much of a runner, then are you No? No,
I run. I'm a runner for sure. And Bubba has
solved the racist bridge problems that we have. You know,
(10:40):
we got all these racist bridges in the country. That's
what Mayor Pete says. Yeah, he says, all you gotta
do is back another bus up to the other end
of the bridge. Okay, so the bus pulls up to
the bridge. Black people just loaded down on that bus
and they're trying to get to the beach. And then
the bus won't go under the bridge because it's too low.
Too low. Yeah, all you gotta do get off that bus,
(11:01):
walk to the other end of the bridge, get on
the other bus that's waiting for him there and shuttle
it right along. You see how that worked.
Speaker 2 (11:08):
You know, he's right. I mean, as silly and stupid
as this whole thing is. If that's what's preventing black
people from getting to the public pool.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
That's the biggest issue they've got to deal with. Then
problem solved.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
You're telling me it's impossible for them to just switch
buses at the bridge. Okay, get out of here, you
walk eight feet over there.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
No, he's right. That solves the whole problem immediately. I
don't know why we all didn't think of that. Now.
I just think now I'm.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
Beginning to think all these racist people from the past
just wanted to be racist.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
It's almost like they're just finding things to be upset
about and pointing a finger and screaming racist just because
they don't like the person. Yeah, well that shouldn't shouldn't
be that way.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
Do you guys like a good, feel good story? You
guys like feeling good?
Speaker 1 (11:50):
Feel good? Is it an animal story? It involves a
three year old boy, Okay, as long as nothing bad happens.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
A three year old in Colorado. He saved his great
grandma after she fell last month and hit her head.
It happened next to you some steps outside her home
and her phone was in her car, so she told
him to be brave and go get it for her.
Here's Sharon Lewis talking about her great grandson Bridger.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
I'm sorry, what where's this taking Blazier again?
Speaker 2 (12:19):
It says his name is Bridger, right, that's a kid's name.
Bridge is a name. Yeah, we're just gonna accept that
and move on with a news story like that.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
It's been a last name for years. Somebody like to
turned it into a first name. Now, all right, this
was in Colorado. Here's the great grandma of Bridge Bridger
because that's a name. Yeah, go ahead play the audio.
Oh sorry, it's the computer's not working right, keating them
all again. Thanks.
Speaker 6 (12:41):
We were walking up the sidewalk and it was dark
because the porchlight wasn't on, and I tripped over something
and fell, and then we started hollering for the neighbor,
but that didn't work. I said, so, Bridger, you're going
to have to be a big boy and go out
to the car and get Gg's throne. And he said,
(13:05):
it's really dark.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
Gg.
Speaker 6 (13:07):
I said it'll be okay. Jesus will help you. Don't
be afraid. Well, yeah, almost scared. I call him my
hero and he says, no, gg I'm Bridger.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
Oh God.
Speaker 2 (13:23):
When I was a little kid, my parents used to
tell me if you're if you keep behaving this way,
you're gonna have to live with the consequences.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
Jesus is watching you.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
And then I would say, I don't want to live
with the consequences. I want to live with you.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
Guys. Ah, that's cute, kitty. Uh, how come you're not
still lovable like that? I know I haven't been cuting
in a long time. Bridge Bridge.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
Is it possible they named him Bridger as a tribute
to all the people that have been impressed by a
racist Bridge.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
That's what I was assuming they did it. Art could
have had something to do with Jim Bridger, the mountain man,
who they named about half of Wyoming or Montana over. Yeah,
is that right?
Speaker 2 (13:57):
If I go to Wyoming, I'm going to see a
lot of stuff called Bridger just everywhere. Yeah, they probably
got a bridge a bridge, there's a you know that
you could You can't have a Bridger Bridger is.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
A natural park, Bridger mountain range, Bridger real estate. I'm
sure there's a Bridger refrigeration repair Company. Now, I mean
it's ever God forbid. Somebody asks for permission to bridge
or bridge? Hey, do you know where the bridge is at?
Which bridge? Bridger Bridge? Bridger No? No, the bridge bridge?
You mean the one named after that little three year
old hero. I guess, so maybe next time. Congratulations, young man.
(14:31):
That's a good move for him.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
All right, And now what happens when you take the
song Owner of a Lonely Heart and combine combine it
with let It Whip by the dazz Band and Ronnie
James Dio's Rainbow in the Dark. You probably don't want
to know, but you're about to find out. Oh my, it.
Speaker 5 (15:27):
Is.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Depending on your musical taste, this says either one of
the greatest things you've ever heard, or it's kind of
like the musical version of Tracy Morgan throwing up on
the basketball court.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
I don't actually know. I don't actually know the song
let It Whip by the Dazzba. I don't know that,
but it sound like they put it sound by it
in advo saying crack that whip?
Speaker 1 (15:46):
Is that? Yeah? They did that too. Yeah, it's in
both songs. No, I'm not sure about the first one.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
How many songs were there back in the day about
whipping people? Oh?
Speaker 1 (15:55):
Yeah, you don't want to know.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
Are we supposed to be that a long time ago
people were getting whipped so frequent only that they needed
multiple songs.
Speaker 1 (16:01):
Written about it?
Speaker 2 (16:02):
Yes, that's who would ever believe that? No, men getting
whipped to the point where they need pop songs about it.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
I can't think of.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
One example from history if somebody getting whipped so much
that they needed to make a song about it?
Speaker 1 (16:15):
Is that right? Not one? Yeah? Not one? What about you? Mister? Oh?
Could you think I got one? Oh? I think I do?
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Oh, okay, well you don't want to know. No, I
believe you. March madness? You guys into it?
Speaker 1 (16:26):
Or is it? Oh? Is it that time again? Already?
Speaker 2 (16:30):
It's that time again? March Madness began with a final
seconds coming. Well, you know what, why don't we do
after this? I think after this we could do our
sports report. We're gonna get gay for space again, so
stick around for that. And criminals are stupid. We got
a report on that coming up in just a little bit.
And I am told that somebody has been asked to
leave the cabin of an airplane because of their unruly
(16:52):
behavior I know sounds like from Texas Justice to me
Speaker 1 (16:56):
Lockett, Walton and Johnson Radio Network,
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