Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Bro, when it comes to happen, is it gonna Is
it gonna pop in a minute? Is it gonna go?
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Coo?
Speaker 1 (00:06):
I'm expecting some some some action here. It says eight
o'clock in the morning.
Speaker 3 (00:10):
This is the good stuff when it comes to Catholic music,
Gregorian Chance is the good stuff.
Speaker 4 (00:15):
Bro.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
It is three in the afternoon in Rome, Italy. As
far as the iPhone knows anyway, I'm not there, but
you know I could tell you I was, and I'm
doing a stand up remote call in from Rome at
the Vatican. Can y'all hear me back in Houston and
in the United States? Thank you?
Speaker 4 (00:37):
Now, it's our on the street reporter in Italy's chef
boy Ardy. What's going on, Bubba.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
I think it's about time for them to wake up
the cardinals after that big meal. You know, they had
an early launch after the vote no Pope, so then
they all kind of betted down. They're old, man, They're
all in their sixties and seventies. Yeah, yeah, and so
they needed a little little snooze time. But I think
(01:03):
it's bed time for them to get back to work now.
We should be seeing some more smoke here in the
next hour. Or two, I hope.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Okay, the unintended consequences of them around the clock news
coverage of picking the new papal is that CBS has
once again revealed they're completely out of touch with what's
happening in the real world.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
How you figure.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
Okay, CBS News is reporting on the conclave yesterday, and
the news anchors they don't know what. God, I'm so
sorry for being the one to say this. They don't
know what raw dogging it means. They don't. No, that
means not wearing no underwear, right, No, it means not no,
that would be going commando Bill. Yet, raw dogging means
you're not using a forgive me for those of you
(01:42):
with kids in the car, Jimmy, Yeah, having sex without
a prophylactic right, which.
Speaker 4 (01:46):
We don't recommend.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
We recommend using protection. That's you know, irresponsible adults use
protection always. Yeah, I mean, look, there's a venia epidemic.
Speaker 1 (01:55):
You're unaware of what condoms are, or or how to
use them or what.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
I mean.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
They're probably totally lost because they've never had no set.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
No, it's true, it's a group of virgins, but this
isn't about the cardinals.
Speaker 4 (02:08):
It's about CBS News.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
CBS News is reporting on the conclave when this happens.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
The one thing we know they're not doing is checking
Instagram because their devices.
Speaker 4 (02:17):
Of all, I believe the kids. I believe the kids
call it raw dog.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
You don't go through a long period of time with
no electronic device.
Speaker 4 (02:24):
Yeah right, No, that's not quite right. That's a joke
on the internet that he didn't get.
Speaker 3 (02:30):
Some people on the internet said, you know what raw
dog in It is when you don't bring anything on
the airplane that you can read.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
No, no, no entertainment, no distraction.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
That's the punchline. Is that is that that's not what
it is. That is not But he didn't know that. Bro,
there's you know.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
They're just so used to telling you things and you
just believing them because they're the news that they're just
they're not even working, they're not even trying hard to
verify anything.
Speaker 3 (02:59):
And they're so good at people, Yes they are. Anyway,
Look all that being said, we found a new Pope.
We got the Pope Draft happening, which with.
Speaker 5 (03:05):
The number one pick in the twenty twenty five National
Catholic League Pope Draft, the Saints have traded to the cardinals,
and with that number one pick, the Vatican Cardinals select
wide Redeemer Pierre Batista.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
He sabala, So salon.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
Listen to this crowd, baby, that crowd man.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
But did you hear the crowd yesterday? They started cheering
when they saw the black smoke come out after the
first vote.
Speaker 4 (03:38):
Sure, that's because they're excited about my new mixtape. I
get that.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Yeah. I guess they've just been standing out there in
the sun all day, staring up at the roof. They
were just happy to see some action other than a seagull.
That seagull would not leave. He was standing right by
that chimney. I guess that the smoke was enough to
kind of more run him off.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
Okay, Apparently there was a very odd chord moment where
the clouds got behind got in front of the sun,
and then and then they parted a little bit and
there was a little bit of like romulus, cumulus cloud
whatever it's called right by it in row. It's a romulus,
thank you very much. Right by the chimney. There was
a little like usorimus clouds at all. And people thought
that that cloud was smoke.
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Black clouds, black cloud.
Speaker 3 (04:20):
So everyone starts cheering, and then when they realized what
it was, the crowd was.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
Like, oh, but they were gonna cheer whatever color smoke
came out of that chimney. They're just happy to see activity.
Speaker 3 (04:32):
But also it kind of disappoints me that a group
of Catholics didn't see that for what it really was.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
You know, they should have paid better attention.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
No, no, I mean there are no coincidences.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
That's what you mean. It's God talking to you. The
God's telling you we're working on a pope. We think
we know who the pope is. But there were a
lot of white clouds too. Didn't that mean that the
pope's already been chosen? I mean, the pope has been
chosen for the record, the.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
Cal Lord that God knows who it'll be. It's just
that man hasn't been informed yet.
Speaker 4 (04:57):
You know, I don't know that work. I know, you
pull a stink in your voice you say that.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
Why do you say that?
Speaker 4 (05:01):
Because that's what I think. I really believe that.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
When I tell people I believe in angels and demons,
they're always like, oh, yeah, me too, And I'm like, no, heye, book,
And then I'll say I'm a Catholic and they're like,
Catholics are weird.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
Speaking of Catholics, two of your favorites are going to
be on TV today. This is bad news for Kenny. Okay,
good news for the rest of us, because you know,
we don't have to watch. But Kenny always watches things
I do, like CNN or The View, so you don't
have to. Well, this morning, Jill and Joe Biden will
(05:33):
be guests on The View.
Speaker 3 (05:36):
I will watch it, and you will have to watch
it at the very least. I watched the clips online.
Let us know what happens. But how are they going
to doll it up so he looks How do they
make him look cool? I bet Jill does all the heap.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
Let's say, she'll do all the all the real talking,
and he'll well.
Speaker 4 (05:52):
There's a reason why she's there. What do you need
her there for? Does Trump need Malania to do an interview? No?
Speaker 1 (05:58):
I don't think so.
Speaker 3 (05:59):
I mean even people always say, like, yeah, Michelle Obama
was a central focal point of Barack Obama's administration.
Speaker 4 (06:04):
Actually she wasn't.
Speaker 3 (06:06):
Barack Obama had no trouble going out and talking on
his own and the only policy she ever had any
influence on was school lunches.
Speaker 4 (06:13):
That's how insignificant Michelle Obama was.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
They hated them so bad that the whole program failed
all right.
Speaker 3 (06:19):
Last week in the state of Texas, a no good
rhino named Dade Fahalin tried to pass a bill that
actually did pass in the House and is moving to
the Senate now, a stupid law that's intended to criminalize
memes and political memes specifically, I think, and people will
tell you, you know, you're misunderstanding it.
Speaker 1 (06:37):
That's just getting the foot in the door. Once they
get that political meme thing, then they'll go after other
stuff too. That's how they do it. It's always been
that way. It's what they keep doing.
Speaker 3 (06:46):
People in the state of Texas that support the law
will say, well, this only applies to lobbyists and people
who buy political ads. What they're not telling you is
that sometimes average normal people that get a little too
involved in politics get charged with crime for not registering
as a lobbyist when they're not a lobbyist. Oh boy,
And then this is another thing they could stack on
top of it. It is criminalizing memes. The people that
(07:08):
are saying that either don't understand the system, or they're
assuming you don't understand the system anyway. Dad Fhalin is
the no good rhino, useless leftist liberal Republican so called
Republican that pushed the bill. And even if you don't
live in the state of Texas, I assure you this
will affect you. This is policy that is actually they're
trying to push in other states. Now, he promised us
(07:28):
his stupid law wasn't intended to criminalize memes, and then
yesterday we learned he set law enforcement after a bunch
of liberty activists for printing out pictures of memes and
putting them on his front door. Yeah, what a loser
as what a complete and utter douchebag this guy is.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
This email has summed up what I was trying to
describe to you about your new rap name.
Speaker 3 (07:50):
Oh okay, it's b laq dollar sign moo with an
accent mark on it, k exclamation, bark black smoke.
Speaker 4 (07:58):
No, I like that. That's that's you. And the person
that sent you that email is a doctor.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
It's a doctor.
Speaker 4 (08:03):
We have doctors that listen. Well, yeah, doctor Brett. You
know doctor Brett.
Speaker 3 (08:07):
You nailed it. Bro black smoke, that's my name. Now Sorry,
Gunner's strong arm. We'll get back to you after the conclaves.
Speaker 4 (08:13):
All day we're Gunner. Maybe that could be like my
alter ego or something. I don't know. That's cool that
doctors listened to the show. It's always interesting too.
Speaker 3 (08:21):
We meet a lot of rocket scientists because our radio
show reaches a lot of places where there are NASA
facilities and SpaceX facilities. And every time I meet one
of them, they're clearly smarter than us, like it's not
even close. D And I always think, like, wow, you
get important information from us.
Speaker 4 (08:36):
That terrifies me.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
I've met a rocket scientist last weekend, and this guy
was in charge of the rover. Yeah, you talked about
a cool job. I mean rockets, that's cool and everything. Sure,
but he's in charge of the rover. We got one
on Mars, things like a million miles away, and he
can still he can still make it work. He's still
you know, like Dud's a little joysticky thing or whatever
(08:59):
and make it work.
Speaker 4 (09:00):
I could do that, you know.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
I'm questioned from the email, and this might take some
time to discuss. Maybe we can all, you know, just
absorb the question, mull it over for the next few
minutes and reply, So here's the pot problem. On time
is racist?
Speaker 4 (09:20):
Obviously.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
Okay, So at that Frontier Airlines audio that you just
played a few minutes ago.
Speaker 4 (09:27):
I already see where this is going.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
Go ahead, you don't the airline employees tell the customer
that he was late, he was not there on time. Now,
how is it that you have the privilege of being
late and that's okay, but telling other people they can't be.
Speaker 4 (09:47):
That's a fantastic point. Also, this is pretty wild.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
Med schools are now struggling to overcome racism in the
health industry. They say one of the reasons that's true
is that being on time is a reason that black
people don't stick seed in healthcare.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
It was like, how could that possibly be true? They
have to have made that up.
Speaker 3 (10:05):
It's mentioned in a website on the CDC, the American
Medical Association, It's in a Time article. It's obviously, it's
in a California Healthcare Foundation story report that they publish.
And I'm just carrious. If you're about to get life
saving brain surgery done, if they're about to remove, you know,
a steel bar that got injected into your lower torso
(10:25):
you have seconds to live or minutes or whatever. Wouldn't
you really really really want the doctor to not be
fashionably late for something like that.
Speaker 1 (10:32):
I think that might be best.
Speaker 4 (10:34):
I ain't asking for the.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
World here, I'm just asking for eight ball and two
million dollars. This is the Walton and Johnson show.
Speaker 3 (10:41):
That happens in humanity sometimes, where you think you really
want something right up until you get it, and then
you realize you hate it.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
It's the careful what you wish for a story.
Speaker 3 (10:49):
I think an easy example would be there's some young
men who think they wanted you two chicks at the
same time.
Speaker 1 (10:55):
Careful what you wish for?
Speaker 4 (10:57):
You don't have the energy or the time for that.
Speaker 3 (11:00):
Not going to be able to perform in that kind
of and that kind of pressure with two women standing
there looking at you, staring at their watch.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
Well, if they're standing there, you're doing it wrong.
Speaker 3 (11:09):
Well to your point, yeah, obviously, but it's a lot
of work to please one woman, much less too. Who
do you think you are? Damn, I must be an
old hoochie. I've pleased thousand Well, oh my god, I
believe him.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
But I mean with a nice meal sometimes, you know,
a glass of of wine or another adult beverage of
their choice.
Speaker 3 (11:29):
Margarita always work obviously. Yeah, yeah, you're a nice guy.
You probably come over and help them do chores and stuff.
I believe that. Well, you know, on the subject of you, mister, oh,
there's there's some liberals who want the next pope to
look like you.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
Oh yeah, they say it's time. Yeah, we got a
black pope coming your way. And I don't know what
the odds are on him, but he in the top ten.
That's right, there's three. There's three African Okay, let's be clear,
wha wha they got three in the top ten.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
They're not in the top ten. There's just three that
are being considered. They even have a chance. They say,
Cardinal Roberts's let's be clear. If there's a black pope,
he's not going to come from America. It's not going
to be the Cardinal of Harlem or whatever.
Speaker 1 (12:10):
The only one that's in the top ten that I
see is a Caudwo Turkson.
Speaker 4 (12:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
Target, he's Ghana, Yeah, Cape Coast and Ghana is they
said he's palp papabile, papable.
Speaker 4 (12:22):
Is that what they're calling pope Pope?
Speaker 1 (12:24):
Uh, he could be pope.
Speaker 3 (12:25):
He was appointed by Pope John Paul the Second in
two thousand and three, which makes him amendable to those
who want to pope who was not appointed by Francis.
Speaker 4 (12:33):
Now, here's the problem with having a black pope.
Speaker 3 (12:36):
If there's a black pope, which is which is what
liberals from the West in places like America and Canada
and the UK and France, that's what they want.
Speaker 4 (12:43):
They want a black pope.
Speaker 3 (12:44):
There is no way that any of the black popes
that they that they could end up getting are going
to be progressive like Francis. And I'll take this a
step further. There's no way that any of the black
popes are not going to want to criminalize homosexuality.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
Uh Turkson, Yeah, of Ghano says he is against the
criminalization of homosexuality. No, he says that maybe because he's
running for pope.
Speaker 4 (13:06):
Right.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
Oh, we don't know what he'll do when he gets
in there.
Speaker 3 (13:08):
Okay, what I'm reading is that they're all actually okay
with it, but that he said that more recently, that
he said LGB people should not be criminalized, but that
that's been contradicted by previous sermons that he gave. He
comes from a country where they do arrest people for
being gay.
Speaker 1 (13:23):
Let's judge them on their actions and not on their words.
What we say.
Speaker 3 (13:27):
Yeah, and apparently there are members of your community that
are aware of this. They're even doing like a drag
queen thing now, like a RuPaul's drag queen thing for popes,
where they're explaining which one of these popes could be
the best for the gay community.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
What are the chances that we're about to have a pope?
Speaker 4 (13:42):
Pizza Bola.
Speaker 2 (13:43):
The odds are in starting base of it that these
girlies are locking themselves up in a conclicate and they
are not leaving until one is crowned.
Speaker 4 (13:50):
Mother.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
Well, I pulled all the odds from these sites and
I aggregated it, and here's your top ten for who's
most likely to be pope? Coming in at number ten,
we have this diva Bussungo. In the last week or so,
traditionalists have been throwing a lot of weight behind African
cardinals under the guise of progress, even though they are
some of the most conservative.
Speaker 3 (14:08):
Do they know he looked like he is eating people
the black eye or the gay guy bothoom go dude,
there he looked like he ha snacked on human flesh.
Speaker 4 (14:17):
I don't know about all that. He's not from Haiti.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
You know that was the Congo Congo.
Speaker 4 (14:23):
Do they do uh? Do they do the cannibalism there is?
Speaker 1 (14:26):
You know, maybe it was a vacation he took. Maybe
he went to Haiti on vacation. I don't know what
to do.
Speaker 4 (14:32):
Well.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
I didn't say he ate human flesh. I said he
looked like it. That's just my opinion. I believe I
have my own opinion. I guess I'll have to ask
Whitey what it is. Oh yeah, I'll let you know.
Speaker 3 (14:43):
Well, I'm not white anymore now I'm DJ Black Smoke
or am i EMBc black Smoke?
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Yeah? What are you going to be?
Speaker 3 (14:49):
I don't know anyway. The Cardinal of b the car smoke.
The Cardinal of Haiti where they do the cannibalism is
Chilby Longloss Langeloss Shelby God's Chipley.
Speaker 1 (15:01):
Does he know of a fried chicken dinner?
Speaker 4 (15:06):
That's I don't know if you're allowed to ask that question, Bill.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Yet, that's the leader of Haiti.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Oh no, barbecue, barbeque, barbecue. Yeah, I could see why
you'd be confised.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
Well, I knew it was one of my favorite meals.
He barbecue? Then does he hang out with the future Pope?
Speaker 4 (15:19):
Did he do a racism mister Oi, help me out it? Okay,
all right?
Speaker 3 (15:23):
If he says it's okay, I'm okay with it, that's
all all right.
Speaker 4 (15:27):
No, barbecue is not cardinal.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
No, the leader of Haiti, the gang member that the
cannibal gang member on the island of Haiti.
Speaker 4 (15:33):
We haven't heard about him in almost I don't know months.
Speaker 1 (15:35):
Yeah, where'd he go?
Speaker 3 (15:36):
They never arrested him. No, he's still out there right now.
Maybe he's shopping at this new store in Vatican City.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
They got a store. Yeah, use it, merch.
Speaker 3 (15:44):
Well, street wear is so hot right now. Have you
noticed I'm wearing my street wear today. I got the
crew neck with it all about the Pope. Yeah, it's
all about well. Yeah, you know, I'm looking good. And
you know I got my my my what do they
call it, drip? I got my drip on and then
don't that's no, that's what the kids are doing anyway.
Speaker 4 (16:00):
Vatican City is getting in on it.
Speaker 6 (16:01):
Lidd's is growing, and just in time for Conclave, it's
the grand opening of LIDS Vatican City with a giant
selection of your favorite ecclesiastical hats, ryamzakettos, the popey skull
caps and white, red and purple miters, your traditional tall
pointy pop p hat in precious, golden and simple, plus
papal tierras, crowns, Barretta Saturno's and yes, we carry an
unnecessarily large selection of Yankee hats too. If you're a
(16:24):
following Farcis, maybe you pull for Pious the twelfth or
your writer die is John Paul the Second Show your
devotion with Lydd's authentic game warn Pope jerseys plus autographed
priest callers and Pulpe trading cards.
Speaker 4 (16:35):
Cool I got a pub a game.
Speaker 6 (16:38):
Collect all two hundred and sixty six. It's the grand
opening of lids Vatican City, open now next to the
Sistine Chapel in the Holy Father outlet.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Mall all right, I got some bad news, yeah, Pizza
bowles out. Earlier in the show, we voted on the
exciting news about the ghost of dingle Bari was flying
around Pakistan there fighting against the oppressive Indians.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
It sounded almost made up.
Speaker 3 (17:00):
Yeah, it turns out it was. Yeah, there's no fighter
pilot in Pakistan. In the Ghost to dingle Bari. It's
all made up.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
Yeah, I have to know where they squeezed that new
story into the Vatican City because it is the smallest
nation on the planet. Did you know it is zero
point six miles long? Uh huh point five miles half
a mile Basically it's slightly oval shaped, and that if
you ran around the perimeter of the Vatican it would
(17:29):
take well you run, I do, I'm a runner. In
how long would it take you to run two and
a quarter miles?
Speaker 4 (17:36):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (17:37):
I like probably a little more than ten minutes.
Speaker 1 (17:39):
Yeah, you could run around the Vatican in about ten minutes. Yeah,
it's so tiny, I like they have room for a
new store.
Speaker 3 (17:46):
So the Vatican is the smallest city, country, country, Excuse me.
I always would have thought it was Monaco, But that's
number two, it turns out, And then after that a
bunch of places you never heard of.
Speaker 1 (17:57):
Especially here. The Vatican City is about one hundred and
ten acres. That buddies of mine up there in Grahams
County got bigger places than that.
Speaker 4 (18:05):
Sure.
Speaker 1 (18:06):
Yeah, and they don't call it a country, do they?
Speaker 4 (18:08):
Well? No, but why not?
Speaker 1 (18:09):
You know, maybe we ought to start calling it. It's
my country. Well, think about it. We're in a sealed city.
We're in a city.
Speaker 3 (18:15):
That's bigger than Delaware, bigger than bigger Rhode Island from Connecticut. Right,
why didn't Houston get its own senators? That's what I
want to know. Yeah, Hey, you know, we haven't done
local news yet on the show today. So what do
you mean how local? Well, you know difference. They're listening
to us all over the globe. I mean local could
mean Germany, could mean Wisconsin, could mean New Orleans, Houston, Memphis.
Speaker 4 (18:37):
I don't know where are you going? Well, that's what
I mean, all those places. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (18:41):
Memphis police officers found not guilty of all state charges
and the Tyree Nichols beating death to go to Darius
being Demetrius Haley and Justin Smith were accused of fatally
beating the twenty nine year old man to death January seven.
Speaker 4 (18:54):
Twenty twenty three.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
Didn't do nothing, and it turns out he did do something.
Oh and so they're trying to fight with him. Was actually,
according to the jury, here was a reasonable response to that.
Speaker 4 (19:04):
Meanwhile in that was Memphis.
Speaker 3 (19:06):
Meanwhile in Fort Worth, landman stars Sam Sam Elliott stopped
by the famed Fort Worth, tex Mex Spot while in town,
so he could grab a bite to eat from cowtown's
best known tex mech spot and fighting. Yeah, it's Joe T.
Garcia's over there. That's over there in the stockyards. Yeah, buddy,
if you know, and you know it's no Taco Bell,
but is pretty good, I think, ye. And oh, I
(19:29):
don't even know if I want to talk about this
one seven year old Texas girl found locked in closet
and starving at ain't right. Yeah, I don't like that
at all. That's terrible. Anyway, they found her. That was
in Austin, so that that's pretty good news over there.
And if you live in Alabama today, the good news
is lawmakers passed ability to regulate vapes and hemp products
in your state, so which I kind of think you
(19:49):
could already do.
Speaker 4 (19:50):
But you could always go to heywood Harvest dot com.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
You can do that.
Speaker 2 (19:53):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
By the way, they are sponsoring today's Florida Man Story.
Oh should I believe is coming up?
Speaker 4 (20:00):
It's coming on Bright after this.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Welton and Johnson's show side effects include better mood, increased attractiveness,
elevated IQ, and possibly death.
Speaker 4 (20:10):
Winner
Bro, when it comes to happen, is it gonna Is
it gonna pop in a minute? Is it gonna go?
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Coo?
Speaker 1 (00:06):
I'm expecting some some some action here. It says eight
o'clock in the morning.
Speaker 3 (00:10):
This is the good stuff when it comes to Catholic music,
Gregorian Chance is the good stuff.
Speaker 4 (00:15):
Bro.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
It is three in the afternoon in Rome, Italy. As
far as the iPhone knows anyway, I'm not there, but
you know I could tell you I was, and I'm
doing a stand up remote call in from Rome at
the Vatican. Can y'all hear me back in Houston and
in the United States? Thank you?
Speaker 4 (00:37):
Now, it's our on the street reporter in Italy's chef
boy Ardy. What's going on, Bubba.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
I think it's about time for them to wake up
the cardinals after that big meal. You know, they had
an early launch after the vote no Pope, so then
they all kind of betted down. They're old, man, They're
all in their sixties and seventies. Yeah, yeah, and so
they needed a little little snooze time. But I think
(01:03):
it's bed time for them to get back to work now.
We should be seeing some more smoke here in the
next hour. Or two, I hope.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Okay, the unintended consequences of them around the clock news
coverage of picking the new papal is that CBS has
once again revealed they're completely out of touch with what's
happening in the real world.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
How you figure.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
Okay, CBS News is reporting on the conclave yesterday, and
the news anchors they don't know what. God, I'm so
sorry for being the one to say this. They don't
know what raw dogging it means. They don't. No, that
means not wearing no underwear, right, No, it means not no,
that would be going commando Bill. Yet, raw dogging means
you're not using a forgive me for those of you
(01:42):
with kids in the car, Jimmy, Yeah, having sex without
a prophylactic right, which.
Speaker 4 (01:46):
We don't recommend.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
We recommend using protection. That's you know, irresponsible adults use
protection always. Yeah, I mean, look, there's a venia epidemic.
Speaker 1 (01:55):
You're unaware of what condoms are, or or how to
use them or what.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
I mean.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
They're probably totally lost because they've never had no set.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
No, it's true, it's a group of virgins, but this
isn't about the cardinals.
Speaker 4 (02:08):
It's about CBS News.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
CBS News is reporting on the conclave when this happens.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
The one thing we know they're not doing is checking
Instagram because their devices.
Speaker 4 (02:17):
Of all, I believe the kids. I believe the kids
call it raw dog.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
You don't go through a long period of time with
no electronic device.
Speaker 4 (02:24):
Yeah right, No, that's not quite right. That's a joke
on the internet that he didn't get.
Speaker 3 (02:30):
Some people on the internet said, you know what raw
dog in It is when you don't bring anything on
the airplane that you can read.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
No, no, no entertainment, no distraction.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
That's the punchline. Is that is that that's not what
it is. That is not But he didn't know that. Bro,
there's you know.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
They're just so used to telling you things and you
just believing them because they're the news that they're just
they're not even working, they're not even trying hard to
verify anything.
Speaker 3 (02:59):
And they're so good at people, Yes they are. Anyway,
Look all that being said, we found a new Pope.
We got the Pope Draft happening, which with.
Speaker 5 (03:05):
The number one pick in the twenty twenty five National
Catholic League Pope Draft, the Saints have traded to the cardinals,
and with that number one pick, the Vatican Cardinals select
wide Redeemer Pierre Batista.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
He sabala, So salon.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
Listen to this crowd, baby, that crowd man.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
But did you hear the crowd yesterday? They started cheering
when they saw the black smoke come out after the
first vote.
Speaker 4 (03:38):
Sure, that's because they're excited about my new mixtape. I
get that.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Yeah. I guess they've just been standing out there in
the sun all day, staring up at the roof. They
were just happy to see some action other than a seagull.
That seagull would not leave. He was standing right by
that chimney. I guess that the smoke was enough to
kind of more run him off.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
Okay, Apparently there was a very odd chord moment where
the clouds got behind got in front of the sun,
and then and then they parted a little bit and
there was a little bit of like romulus, cumulus cloud
whatever it's called right by it in row. It's a romulus,
thank you very much. Right by the chimney. There was
a little like usorimus clouds at all. And people thought
that that cloud was smoke.
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Black clouds, black cloud.
Speaker 3 (04:20):
So everyone starts cheering, and then when they realized what
it was, the crowd was.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
Like, oh, but they were gonna cheer whatever color smoke
came out of that chimney. They're just happy to see activity.
Speaker 3 (04:32):
But also it kind of disappoints me that a group
of Catholics didn't see that for what it really was.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
You know, they should have paid better attention.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
No, no, I mean there are no coincidences.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
That's what you mean. It's God talking to you. The
God's telling you we're working on a pope. We think
we know who the pope is. But there were a
lot of white clouds too. Didn't that mean that the
pope's already been chosen? I mean, the pope has been
chosen for the record, the.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
Cal Lord that God knows who it'll be. It's just
that man hasn't been informed yet.
Speaker 4 (04:57):
You know, I don't know that work. I know, you
pull a stink in your voice you say that.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
Why do you say that?
Speaker 4 (05:01):
Because that's what I think. I really believe that.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
When I tell people I believe in angels and demons,
they're always like, oh, yeah, me too, And I'm like, no, heye, book,
And then I'll say I'm a Catholic and they're like,
Catholics are weird.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
Speaking of Catholics, two of your favorites are going to
be on TV today. This is bad news for Kenny. Okay,
good news for the rest of us, because you know,
we don't have to watch. But Kenny always watches things
I do, like CNN or The View, so you don't
have to. Well, this morning, Jill and Joe Biden will
(05:33):
be guests on The View.
Speaker 3 (05:36):
I will watch it, and you will have to watch
it at the very least. I watched the clips online.
Let us know what happens. But how are they going
to doll it up so he looks How do they
make him look cool? I bet Jill does all the heap.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
Let's say, she'll do all the all the real talking,
and he'll well.
Speaker 4 (05:52):
There's a reason why she's there. What do you need
her there for? Does Trump need Malania to do an interview? No?
Speaker 1 (05:58):
I don't think so.
Speaker 3 (05:59):
I mean even people always say, like, yeah, Michelle Obama
was a central focal point of Barack Obama's administration.
Speaker 4 (06:04):
Actually she wasn't.
Speaker 3 (06:06):
Barack Obama had no trouble going out and talking on
his own and the only policy she ever had any
influence on was school lunches.
Speaker 4 (06:13):
That's how insignificant Michelle Obama was.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
They hated them so bad that the whole program failed
all right.
Speaker 3 (06:19):
Last week in the state of Texas, a no good
rhino named Dade Fahalin tried to pass a bill that
actually did pass in the House and is moving to
the Senate now, a stupid law that's intended to criminalize
memes and political memes specifically, I think, and people will
tell you, you know, you're misunderstanding it.
Speaker 1 (06:37):
That's just getting the foot in the door. Once they
get that political meme thing, then they'll go after other
stuff too. That's how they do it. It's always been
that way. It's what they keep doing.
Speaker 3 (06:46):
People in the state of Texas that support the law
will say, well, this only applies to lobbyists and people
who buy political ads. What they're not telling you is
that sometimes average normal people that get a little too
involved in politics get charged with crime for not registering
as a lobbyist when they're not a lobbyist. Oh boy,
And then this is another thing they could stack on
top of it. It is criminalizing memes. The people that
(07:08):
are saying that either don't understand the system, or they're
assuming you don't understand the system anyway. Dad Fhalin is
the no good rhino, useless leftist liberal Republican so called
Republican that pushed the bill. And even if you don't
live in the state of Texas, I assure you this
will affect you. This is policy that is actually they're
trying to push in other states. Now, he promised us
(07:28):
his stupid law wasn't intended to criminalize memes, and then
yesterday we learned he set law enforcement after a bunch
of liberty activists for printing out pictures of memes and
putting them on his front door. Yeah, what a loser
as what a complete and utter douchebag this guy is.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
This email has summed up what I was trying to
describe to you about your new rap name.
Speaker 3 (07:50):
Oh okay, it's b laq dollar sign moo with an
accent mark on it, k exclamation, bark black smoke.
Speaker 4 (07:58):
No, I like that. That's that's you. And the person
that sent you that email is a doctor.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
It's a doctor.
Speaker 4 (08:03):
We have doctors that listen. Well, yeah, doctor Brett. You
know doctor Brett.
Speaker 3 (08:07):
You nailed it. Bro black smoke, that's my name. Now Sorry,
Gunner's strong arm. We'll get back to you after the conclaves.
Speaker 4 (08:13):
All day we're Gunner. Maybe that could be like my
alter ego or something. I don't know. That's cool that
doctors listened to the show. It's always interesting too.
Speaker 3 (08:21):
We meet a lot of rocket scientists because our radio
show reaches a lot of places where there are NASA
facilities and SpaceX facilities. And every time I meet one
of them, they're clearly smarter than us, like it's not
even close. D And I always think, like, wow, you
get important information from us.
Speaker 4 (08:36):
That terrifies me.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
I've met a rocket scientist last weekend, and this guy
was in charge of the rover. Yeah, you talked about
a cool job. I mean rockets, that's cool and everything. Sure,
but he's in charge of the rover. We got one
on Mars, things like a million miles away, and he
can still he can still make it work. He's still
you know, like Dud's a little joysticky thing or whatever
(08:59):
and make it work.
Speaker 4 (09:00):
I could do that, you know.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
I'm questioned from the email, and this might take some
time to discuss. Maybe we can all, you know, just
absorb the question, mull it over for the next few
minutes and reply, So here's the pot problem. On time
is racist?
Speaker 4 (09:20):
Obviously.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
Okay, So at that Frontier Airlines audio that you just
played a few minutes ago.
Speaker 4 (09:27):
I already see where this is going.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
Go ahead, you don't the airline employees tell the customer
that he was late, he was not there on time. Now,
how is it that you have the privilege of being
late and that's okay, but telling other people they can't be.
Speaker 4 (09:47):
That's a fantastic point. Also, this is pretty wild.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
Med schools are now struggling to overcome racism in the
health industry. They say one of the reasons that's true
is that being on time is a reason that black
people don't stick seed in healthcare.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
It was like, how could that possibly be true? They
have to have made that up.
Speaker 3 (10:05):
It's mentioned in a website on the CDC, the American
Medical Association, It's in a Time article. It's obviously, it's
in a California Healthcare Foundation story report that they publish.
And I'm just carrious. If you're about to get life
saving brain surgery done, if they're about to remove, you know,
a steel bar that got injected into your lower torso
(10:25):
you have seconds to live or minutes or whatever. Wouldn't
you really really really want the doctor to not be
fashionably late for something like that.
Speaker 1 (10:32):
I think that might be best.
Speaker 4 (10:34):
I ain't asking for the.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
World here, I'm just asking for eight ball and two
million dollars. This is the Walton and Johnson show.
Speaker 3 (10:41):
That happens in humanity sometimes, where you think you really
want something right up until you get it, and then
you realize you hate it.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
It's the careful what you wish for a story.
Speaker 3 (10:49):
I think an easy example would be there's some young
men who think they wanted you two chicks at the
same time.
Speaker 1 (10:55):
Careful what you wish for?
Speaker 4 (10:57):
You don't have the energy or the time for that.
Speaker 3 (11:00):
Not going to be able to perform in that kind
of and that kind of pressure with two women standing
there looking at you, staring at their watch.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
Well, if they're standing there, you're doing it wrong.
Speaker 3 (11:09):
Well to your point, yeah, obviously, but it's a lot
of work to please one woman, much less too. Who
do you think you are? Damn, I must be an
old hoochie. I've pleased thousand Well, oh my god, I
believe him.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
But I mean with a nice meal sometimes, you know,
a glass of of wine or another adult beverage of
their choice.
Speaker 3 (11:29):
Margarita always work obviously. Yeah, yeah, you're a nice guy.
You probably come over and help them do chores and stuff.
I believe that. Well, you know, on the subject of you, mister, oh,
there's there's some liberals who want the next pope to
look like you.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
Oh yeah, they say it's time. Yeah, we got a
black pope coming your way. And I don't know what
the odds are on him, but he in the top ten.
That's right, there's three. There's three African Okay, let's be clear,
wha wha they got three in the top ten.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
They're not in the top ten. There's just three that
are being considered. They even have a chance. They say,
Cardinal Roberts's let's be clear. If there's a black pope,
he's not going to come from America. It's not going
to be the Cardinal of Harlem or whatever.
Speaker 1 (12:10):
The only one that's in the top ten that I
see is a Caudwo Turkson.
Speaker 4 (12:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
Target, he's Ghana, Yeah, Cape Coast and Ghana is they
said he's palp papabile, papable.
Speaker 4 (12:22):
Is that what they're calling pope Pope?
Speaker 1 (12:24):
Uh, he could be pope.
Speaker 3 (12:25):
He was appointed by Pope John Paul the Second in
two thousand and three, which makes him amendable to those
who want to pope who was not appointed by Francis.
Speaker 4 (12:33):
Now, here's the problem with having a black pope.
Speaker 3 (12:36):
If there's a black pope, which is which is what
liberals from the West in places like America and Canada
and the UK and France, that's what they want.
Speaker 4 (12:43):
They want a black pope.
Speaker 3 (12:44):
There is no way that any of the black popes
that they that they could end up getting are going
to be progressive like Francis. And I'll take this a
step further. There's no way that any of the black
popes are not going to want to criminalize homosexuality.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
Uh Turkson, Yeah, of Ghano says he is against the
criminalization of homosexuality. No, he says that maybe because he's
running for pope.
Speaker 4 (13:06):
Right.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
Oh, we don't know what he'll do when he gets
in there.
Speaker 3 (13:08):
Okay, what I'm reading is that they're all actually okay
with it, but that he said that more recently, that
he said LGB people should not be criminalized, but that
that's been contradicted by previous sermons that he gave. He
comes from a country where they do arrest people for
being gay.
Speaker 1 (13:23):
Let's judge them on their actions and not on their words.
What we say.
Speaker 3 (13:27):
Yeah, and apparently there are members of your community that
are aware of this. They're even doing like a drag
queen thing now, like a RuPaul's drag queen thing for popes,
where they're explaining which one of these popes could be
the best for the gay community.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
What are the chances that we're about to have a pope?
Speaker 4 (13:42):
Pizza Bola.
Speaker 2 (13:43):
The odds are in starting base of it that these
girlies are locking themselves up in a conclicate and they
are not leaving until one is crowned.
Speaker 4 (13:50):
Mother.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
Well, I pulled all the odds from these sites and
I aggregated it, and here's your top ten for who's
most likely to be pope? Coming in at number ten,
we have this diva Bussungo. In the last week or so,
traditionalists have been throwing a lot of weight behind African
cardinals under the guise of progress, even though they are
some of the most conservative.
Speaker 3 (14:08):
Do they know he looked like he is eating people
the black eye or the gay guy bothoom go dude,
there he looked like he ha snacked on human flesh.
Speaker 4 (14:17):
I don't know about all that. He's not from Haiti.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
You know that was the Congo Congo.
Speaker 4 (14:23):
Do they do uh? Do they do the cannibalism there is?
Speaker 1 (14:26):
You know, maybe it was a vacation he took. Maybe
he went to Haiti on vacation. I don't know what
to do.
Speaker 4 (14:32):
Well.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
I didn't say he ate human flesh. I said he
looked like it. That's just my opinion. I believe I
have my own opinion. I guess I'll have to ask
Whitey what it is. Oh yeah, I'll let you know.
Speaker 3 (14:43):
Well, I'm not white anymore now I'm DJ Black Smoke
or am i EMBc black Smoke?
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Yeah? What are you going to be?
Speaker 3 (14:49):
I don't know anyway. The Cardinal of b the car smoke.
The Cardinal of Haiti where they do the cannibalism is
Chilby Longloss Langeloss Shelby God's Chipley.
Speaker 1 (15:01):
Does he know of a fried chicken dinner?
Speaker 4 (15:06):
That's I don't know if you're allowed to ask that question, Bill.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Yet, that's the leader of Haiti.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Oh no, barbecue, barbeque, barbecue. Yeah, I could see why
you'd be confised.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
Well, I knew it was one of my favorite meals.
He barbecue? Then does he hang out with the future Pope?
Speaker 4 (15:19):
Did he do a racism mister Oi, help me out it? Okay,
all right?
Speaker 3 (15:23):
If he says it's okay, I'm okay with it, that's
all all right.
Speaker 4 (15:27):
No, barbecue is not cardinal.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
No, the leader of Haiti, the gang member that the
cannibal gang member on the island of Haiti.
Speaker 4 (15:33):
We haven't heard about him in almost I don't know months.
Speaker 1 (15:35):
Yeah, where'd he go?
Speaker 3 (15:36):
They never arrested him. No, he's still out there right now.
Maybe he's shopping at this new store in Vatican City.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
They got a store. Yeah, use it, merch.
Speaker 3 (15:44):
Well, street wear is so hot right now. Have you
noticed I'm wearing my street wear today. I got the
crew neck with it all about the Pope. Yeah, it's
all about well. Yeah, you know, I'm looking good. And
you know I got my my my what do they
call it, drip? I got my drip on and then
don't that's no, that's what the kids are doing anyway.
Speaker 4 (16:00):
Vatican City is getting in on it.
Speaker 6 (16:01):
Lidd's is growing, and just in time for Conclave, it's
the grand opening of LIDS Vatican City with a giant
selection of your favorite ecclesiastical hats, ryamzakettos, the popey skull
caps and white, red and purple miters, your traditional tall
pointy pop p hat in precious, golden and simple, plus
papal tierras, crowns, Barretta Saturno's and yes, we carry an
unnecessarily large selection of Yankee hats too. If you're a
(16:24):
following Farcis, maybe you pull for Pious the twelfth or
your writer die is John Paul the Second Show your
devotion with Lydd's authentic game warn Pope jerseys plus autographed
priest callers and Pulpe trading cards.
Speaker 4 (16:35):
Cool I got a pub a game.
Speaker 6 (16:38):
Collect all two hundred and sixty six. It's the grand
opening of lids Vatican City, open now next to the
Sistine Chapel in the Holy Father outlet.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Mall all right, I got some bad news, yeah, Pizza
bowles out. Earlier in the show, we voted on the
exciting news about the ghost of dingle Bari was flying
around Pakistan there fighting against the oppressive Indians.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
It sounded almost made up.
Speaker 3 (17:00):
Yeah, it turns out it was. Yeah, there's no fighter
pilot in Pakistan. In the Ghost to dingle Bari. It's
all made up.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
Yeah, I have to know where they squeezed that new
story into the Vatican City because it is the smallest
nation on the planet. Did you know it is zero
point six miles long? Uh huh point five miles half
a mile Basically it's slightly oval shaped, and that if
you ran around the perimeter of the Vatican it would
(17:29):
take well you run, I do, I'm a runner. In
how long would it take you to run two and
a quarter miles?
Speaker 4 (17:36):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (17:37):
I like probably a little more than ten minutes.
Speaker 1 (17:39):
Yeah, you could run around the Vatican in about ten minutes. Yeah,
it's so tiny, I like they have room for a
new store.
Speaker 3 (17:46):
So the Vatican is the smallest city, country, country, Excuse me.
I always would have thought it was Monaco, But that's
number two, it turns out, And then after that a
bunch of places you never heard of.
Speaker 1 (17:57):
Especially here. The Vatican City is about one hundred and
ten acres. That buddies of mine up there in Grahams
County got bigger places than that.
Speaker 4 (18:05):
Sure.
Speaker 1 (18:06):
Yeah, and they don't call it a country, do they?
Speaker 4 (18:08):
Well? No, but why not?
Speaker 1 (18:09):
You know, maybe we ought to start calling it. It's
my country. Well, think about it. We're in a sealed city.
We're in a city.
Speaker 3 (18:15):
That's bigger than Delaware, bigger than bigger Rhode Island from Connecticut. Right,
why didn't Houston get its own senators? That's what I
want to know. Yeah, Hey, you know, we haven't done
local news yet on the show today. So what do
you mean how local? Well, you know difference. They're listening
to us all over the globe. I mean local could
mean Germany, could mean Wisconsin, could mean New Orleans, Houston, Memphis.
Speaker 4 (18:37):
I don't know where are you going? Well, that's what
I mean, all those places. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (18:41):
Memphis police officers found not guilty of all state charges
and the Tyree Nichols beating death to go to Darius
being Demetrius Haley and Justin Smith were accused of fatally
beating the twenty nine year old man to death January seven.
Speaker 4 (18:54):
Twenty twenty three.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
Didn't do nothing, and it turns out he did do something.
Oh and so they're trying to fight with him. Was actually,
according to the jury, here was a reasonable response to that.
Speaker 4 (19:04):
Meanwhile in that was Memphis.
Speaker 3 (19:06):
Meanwhile in Fort Worth, landman stars Sam Sam Elliott stopped
by the famed Fort Worth, tex Mex Spot while in town,
so he could grab a bite to eat from cowtown's
best known tex mech spot and fighting. Yeah, it's Joe T.
Garcia's over there. That's over there in the stockyards. Yeah, buddy,
if you know, and you know it's no Taco Bell,
but is pretty good, I think, ye. And oh, I
(19:29):
don't even know if I want to talk about this
one seven year old Texas girl found locked in closet
and starving at ain't right. Yeah, I don't like that
at all. That's terrible. Anyway, they found her. That was
in Austin, so that that's pretty good news over there.
And if you live in Alabama today, the good news
is lawmakers passed ability to regulate vapes and hemp products
in your state, so which I kind of think you
(19:49):
could already do.
Speaker 4 (19:50):
But you could always go to heywood Harvest dot com.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
You can do that.
Speaker 2 (19:53):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
By the way, they are sponsoring today's Florida Man Story.
Oh should I believe is coming up?
Speaker 4 (20:00):
It's coming on Bright after this.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Welton and Johnson's show side effects include better mood, increased attractiveness,
elevated IQ, and possibly death.
Speaker 4 (20:10):
Winner
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