Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
A bad about this.
Speaker 2 (00:00):
But apparently Timu is suffering right now because of the tariffs.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Oh no, cheap crap is hurt because.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
The tariffs are so bad for these Chinese online retailers.
Suddenly American retail brick and mortar department stores like Kohal's
and Nordstrom rack or seeing a spike in sales. People
are returning to the way they used to shop instead
of going on tmu dot com.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
And you're supposed to feel bad about that.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
Yeah, everybody I've talked about TMU, they've ordered one thing
one time and it was just total crap, or it
was way off on size, or all of.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
The above, and they don't return.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
I bought a bass guitar pedal on Temu and it
gets really hot when I leave it plugged in or
turned on. And I don't know if I should do
that or not, but I have figured out it's a
cheap way to cook eggs.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
Is that right? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (00:52):
I just flip it upside down and cool. Yeah, I know,
trying to save money there, Thanks China. Chinese guys always
have great ideas always.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Passenger pleads guilty after attempting to open Oh, it's one.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
Of those Oh yeah, it happened. Wait a second.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
I don't know if you guys have heard, but we
do a special report from time to.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Time, kicked alf a plane, kicked alf a plane.
Speaker 4 (01:18):
Here's some money got kicked al a plane.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
It's a very special poorly behaved airline passenger report and
it's probably brought to you by Yay.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Haywood Harvest are friends in the Haywood Forest of northwest Georgia.
There they went and harvested some fabulous things for you
to try. And that's really all we can tell you
about it. They are all the products are legal in
all fifty states. But people within the radio station, you
(01:50):
can't decide what we should and shouldn't describe to you.
So we're just kind of leaving it up to you
to go to the website and find out for yourself.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
Yeah, go take a ganderd Hey Harvest dot com.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
And just know that because Donald Trump signed the Farm Act,
you're legally allowed to purchase their products in any state.
And any lawmaker out there that tries to overturn the
Farm Act wink wink Alabama and Lieutenant Governor Dan Patrick
of Texas.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Also Georgia, I think he is actually talking like that too.
They are anti maga. You guys are anti maga. If
you see something at the website that you like, don't
forget to add the promo.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Code w WNJ you WNJ. Today we tell you the
story of Francisco Severo Torres. This is actually an update
to a previous kicked off a play and report. You
may recall a little while back he was tackled by
fellow passengers when he freaked out on a United Airlines
flight from Los Angeles to Boston. At the time, this
(02:48):
guy stood up and people couldn't tell if he was
a Muslim or just a hippie because he had a
long beard and he had like a stocking hat on
his head.
Speaker 3 (02:55):
Did they have a mustache with the beard or was
it just beard without mustache?
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Must ash of the beer?
Speaker 3 (03:00):
Yeah, okay, now there's no mustnash.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
That's terrish. Why is that?
Speaker 2 (03:05):
I don't know, I don't know. Something they do, something
to do with eating hamas or something. No one knows. Anyway,
he threatened to kill every guy on the plane before
taking that's an exact quote, before attacking the flight attendant
in the neck with silverware.
Speaker 1 (03:17):
That's no way to treat silverware no be nice.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
Torna has admitted to one count of interference and attempted
interference for flight crew members and attendance using a dangerous weapon.
According to the Massachusetts US Attorney's Office, Lee, that's Leah Fawley.
Lea does some good work. Uh, no silverware, just like legit.
I think he had a good seat. So they gave
him a real knife and fork.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
You know what, you can get silver sporks. You can
get metal sporks. I've never seen it. Oh you had
to live Kenney. Yeah, I'll get you. Oh, I won't
give it to you, but I'll show you one.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
What would be the point of having silverware sporks? Isn't
the whole point of silverware that it's supposed to be nice?
Speaker 3 (03:55):
Well, if you have a spoon and a fork separate
on the airplane times, you know, tens of thousands of them,
that's a lot of weight on the plane. So one
utensil replacing two makes the plane lighter, and it's always
fun to eat with a spork anyway.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Well, in this case, Torres did not have a spork,
but he did have a mental health problem because apparently
about forty five minutes into the flight. An alarm went
off in the cockpit after one of the flight attendants
noticed someone was tampering with the emergency door between first
class and coach. Now, this guy was definitely a coach
guy who was not a first class guy.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
Where did he gets silverware?
Speaker 3 (04:32):
Then, first that first class he stole it from some
of the nice people up front.
Speaker 1 (04:37):
Not cool.
Speaker 2 (04:37):
Torres was confronted and then asked if he had been
caught on camera messing with the door handle.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
Turns out he had.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
The crew deemed Torres a potential threat and requested the
captain land as soon as possible. Moments later, Torres got
out of his seat and made his way to the
door again. There's a very wild video that was taken
by one of the passengers and it shows Torres look
at all distressed and incoherent ranting, claiming he was taken
over the plane and that he would kill every man
on board the plane. Fun Then Torres lunged towards the
(05:05):
flight attendant with a broken spoon while making a stabbing motion,
stab stab, stab, hitting the victim three times around the
neck and not cool. Passengers tackled him and he was
restrained with the assistance of the flight crew. He was
taken into custody when the plane landed at Logan Airport.
He told police he wanted to open the door to
jump out of the plane. He said he knew many
people would die if he did.
Speaker 3 (05:27):
Well, Jaklas kicked off a plane. This dude was trying
to kick himself off the plane and they didn't let him.
So it's the exact opposite of getting kicked off a plane.
He was not allowed to get off the plane. Now
you know this is gonna happen more thanks to Donald Trump.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
Why thanks to Trump?
Speaker 2 (05:44):
Thank you for asking, Because more often than not, these
videos you see at people behaving crazy in airports, like
remember the one about the naked woman running around.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
It was at Houston Airport.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
If you search the internet for naked woman at an airport,
oh you'll be busy. It's like watching single moms fight
at a chuck e Cheese.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
There's a lot of these videos.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Out there, and more often than not, it's because they
missed a little bit of alcohol with what anybody anybody pharmaceuticals?
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (06:10):
And what did Donald Trump do this week? Did he
do lowered the cost of pharmaceutical.
Speaker 3 (06:15):
Now they're going to be able to stock up on
cheap drugs, so they'll take twice as many probably and
then cuckoo.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
Now, the plus side is more naked chicks at the airport.
The downside is more violent dudes with beards at the airport.
And I am in favor of one and not the other. Okay, uh,
flip a coin on that one. Yeah, I mean, you know,
I guess it all evens out in the end. The
universe corrects itself. You know, there's something beautiful about a
woman's naked body, but not when she's covered in pockmarks
(06:43):
and face tattoos.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
I don't know why that is. So you're kind of choosy,
are you. Yeah, I'm about that. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
And then I don't know if you noticed, but like
one in ten of these women have a penis, and
I don't like.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
That at all. Well, you are picky.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Yeah, I'm not a fan of the women with penis thing.
I do really don't want to see them at the
airport while I'm trying I need a hot dog waiting
for my flight. No, we don't need that. Now you're
running the hot dog for me. It's like putting ketchup
on it.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
Disgusting and yet some new Naples, Italy. Have you heard
of it. I don't know if you've ever been there
or not. It looks in Naples, Florida. Yeah, same thing, Yes, exactly, sure.
Speaker 3 (07:18):
Naples, Italy was hit by a four point four magnitude earthquake.
It's what they call a major seismic swarm. They have
been having a lot of earthquakes, usually in the three
plus range, but this one was a four point four,
a little bigger. And they said that's a little bit
(07:38):
of a problem because they do have what you call
a large volcano nearby in southern Italy, and that this
earthquake thing might be a cursor of some activity from
the volcano which could then send the earth into Arctic
(07:58):
winter for god knows how many years.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
You're not even explaining the biggest problem. I mean, yeah,
the volcano. Sure, fine. But have you ever seen what
happens when you upset Italian women a little bit?
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Oh? Yes, I have.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Italian women could be very temperamental. Are you upset an
Italian woman just a little bit? It'll ruin your year,
my man.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
I don't know if we's gonna be doing a volcano
report this time of day, but there's volcano in the
Philippines already blasting itself up. I don't know the name
of it. It's Philippines, probably like four in and stuff,
but it erupted, spewed ash and smoke and blah blah
blah up two and a half miles into the sky. Worldwide,
(08:38):
there are currently active forty five volcanoes being looked at,
including that one in southern Italy and that one Philippines.
There's another one in Indonesia. Indonesia, Indonesia, they got a
bunch of them, New Zealand, Guatemala, Ecuador, they got.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
A bunch of them.
Speaker 3 (08:59):
Two. Uh, there's one up there, you know, off the
northwest coast of America.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
Well, then looking that stuff doesn't concern me as much.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
I mean, I don't know if you've ever looked into
this before, but I have Filipino women not as temperamental.
Speaker 1 (09:12):
It should be fine. So oh good, yeah, you ask.
Speaker 4 (09:15):
Government policy is very clear, never back down, never admit
a mistake.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
That's why we won over half the wars. We thought
Walton and Johnson.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
Earlier in the show, we were talking about how the
film Clockwork Hornge vividly depicts what we thought was maybe
a futuristic dysphoria. But actually, maybe the idea of brainwashing
criminals and drugging them into being better citizens isn't as
bad as we thought.
Speaker 3 (09:45):
Okay, that's something we can go with there. Let's expand
on that. That could be a better future.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
I know it was supposed to be terrifying, but maybe
we're just misjudging it, kind of like we're misjudging the
zone of death.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
How you miss judge the zone of death? I mean
aimed at that for a reason. Imagine you know what
the zone of death is? Don't you better set.
Speaker 1 (10:04):
The train station?
Speaker 3 (10:05):
Every time rep or what's your name off somebody at Yellowstone,
they take them to the train station.
Speaker 2 (10:12):
Most of our listeners who probably seen the Yellowstone TV series,
I didn't think this was a real thing. There's a
place in Yellowstone in the TV show nineteen twenty three
where they dump bodies.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
Yeah, isn't that nineteen twenty three as well? I was
going to bring that up. The modern day Yellowstone and
the one hundred year ago you know show.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
They were doing the same thing. Yesterday.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
I was lifting weight. It's at a starting strength gym,
I Shepherd lift.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
I left. You have no idea and one of.
Speaker 2 (10:39):
The guys I left with, who's telling me about the
Idaho Zone of Death. Now follow me here, follow the
bouncing ball, because this is even crazier than it sounds,
and it's gonna sound crazy. The Idaho Zone of Death
is a small area in Yellowstone National Park located in
not surprisingly in well, Idaho, Idaho, where legal loopholes make
it hard to enforce laws. Because of the there's a
(11:00):
mix up in how federal and state jurisdictions overlap. No
court has clear authority to try serious crimes like murder.
This means, in theory, someone could commit a crime there
and avoid prosecution because no one can legally hold a
trial right now.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
Law there's no law enforcement. There's no people.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
Right law enforcement still patrols. Minor crimes are actually quite
easy to handle. It's not totally lawless, but major crimes
are tricky to prosecute.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
The way they changed it up for television, because Hollywood
does things like that. They changed it up to where
it's not in Yellowstone Park. For one thing, it's that
the Montana border because that's where the show was at.
It's a little different, right, And they said there's it's
a county with zero population, so with no people, no
(11:46):
elected officials, so therefore no law. And then but in
reality they do have some law in this place.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Now, apparently this has been there right in front of
our eyes the whole time and clear plain sight, and
we didn't even realize it.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
Are you ready for me to scramble your brain? Realized it?
I saw it on TV. I realized it. I'm not
about the train station a minute. You brought it up.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
No, no, no, you're missing I saw it. You're missing the
craziest part, Billy Had. I'm about to scramble your brains
like that old anti drug ad from the nineteen eighties.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
This is your brain, and this is your brain on drugs.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
Billy Had follow the bouncing ball. It's called the Idaho
Zone of Death. Okay, I'm waiting for the gears stop,
but you look at us. It's not getting that, mister Kenneth.
You're a fashion e stuff Idaho Zone.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
I know it's odd. It's it's that clothing company they
sell it.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
Calls no Zod was the guy I think that was
chasing after the Power Rangers. If I'm not mistaken, Billy Had,
why why do you even know that? Cos I got
kids and kids that wanted to see Power Rangers when
they was little.
Speaker 1 (12:56):
No, no, no, look up on the big screen here in
the studio.
Speaker 2 (12:59):
It's a fashion Look at this isd Isod's like almost
sort of like a more budget friendly version of Polo orst.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
Was he the one with the alligator instead of a
polo horse?
Speaker 1 (13:10):
Sort of?
Speaker 2 (13:11):
Yeah, No, that was the cost. I think the cost
is the more expensive version of ISOD.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
I wish one was the alligator. That's up. No, mine
got them alligator shirts. The cost that's a cost. This
is about ISOD.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
What kind of animal they got on a shirt? Death
Zone of Death is the dead animal? It's exactly.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Yeah, it's this whole time, we've been missing out on
the fact that when you see a guy walking around
wearing AZOD and it looks like he's just a budget
friendly golf enthusiast, he is actually probably committing murder out
in the middle of Yellowstone Park and we didn't even
know about it.
Speaker 1 (13:42):
Well, when we go get him, exactly get him, Well,
what can we do. We can't prosecute the guy. We
can't do it today. We're pretty busy today.
Speaker 3 (13:49):
You know, maybe uh, Memorial Day weekend, we'll get some
extra time after I found out. Oh no, you're you're
busy running around doing all your comedy shows.
Speaker 1 (14:01):
Oh yeah, that's right.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
I'm gonna be doing stand up comedy the weekend of
Memorial Day weekend.
Speaker 3 (14:05):
That weekend of Memorial Day weekend, exactly, Yes, the weekend.
I know it sounds redundant, but it feels like it
was worth repeating. Jackson, Mississippi.
Speaker 2 (14:12):
We're gonna be their Thursday May twenty second, Friday May
twenty third, we're gonna be in Mandeville Saturday, May twenty fourth,
We're gonna be in Metaie.
Speaker 1 (14:20):
How about Dad? And you can get.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
Tickets at jesseisfunny dot com or go to my Twitter account.
Speaker 1 (14:25):
I'm Kenny Webster.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
I'm gonna be on a tour bus final link right
at the top. Yeah, we do get into tour buses.
Got a big king chives bed in the bat. It's nice, bro,
it is nice. Say no more wink as good as
a nod to a blind man.
Speaker 4 (14:38):
You know.
Speaker 2 (14:38):
After I learned about the Idaho Zone of Death, I
started doing a deep dive into the legal system up
there in the state of Idaho. Uh oh, and I
discovered this whole database of Idaho prison inmates who are
looking for love?
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Really, yeah, did you reach out? Well? I found this
one woman. Hang on, I think I think I'm in love.
Speaker 3 (15:00):
My name's Britney Valentine. I'm just looking for some new connections.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
Add me on JPay.
Speaker 3 (15:04):
My number is thirteen thirty four thirty four.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
And then she gets up, she blows a kiss, she
stands up, she turns around, she shows you her bush.
Speaker 1 (15:12):
Is she showing you the good I like, what's her name?
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Britt Everyone?
Speaker 1 (15:15):
My name is Britney.
Speaker 3 (15:15):
Oh my god, I love Brittave. I'm in love with Brittany.
You cultimoart where she said hit me up on JPay, Right, Yeah,
I looked into what that is. It's a way you
can send them money and like give them a tablet.
They can have a tablet for some reason.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
I don't know why. Now, what would you be sending
her money for? Exactly, commissary, I got it.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
When she stood up and showed you her the goods
that you owe her money for that because she looks good.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
I guess presumably if you give her a tablet, she
could use the tablet to photograph herself in compromising positions.
You think she would do something like that a prison
in may really, and it tells you what they're in
there for too, like at the bottom it'll say drug trafficking.
But the funniest one I found is this guy listen
close to what he's saying for a.
Speaker 5 (15:55):
Complete degenerate high school dropout, but absolutely nothing going for
them in this life or the day that I'm the
guy for you. My life skills include day drinking, had
a meaningless sex, playing beer pong, and sorting copious amounts
of white powder off a ceramic plate that I found
in your mom's kitchen cover. I'm not possessive or controlling,
because honestly, I don't give ah what you do.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
But whether you stay or leave a part.
Speaker 5 (16:14):
You're preoccupied with my search for more dank memes, So
you want some to talk to so you can focus
less on the fact that we're all gonna die painfully alone.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Hit me up, the guys, what kind of meat was
he looking for? Memes? Dank memes?
Speaker 3 (16:26):
He said, Okay, that is that good ones.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
Dank memes generally mean they're good memes, right as opposed
to shwag memes.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
You don't want swag memes, and I want no those
are bad man you ask.
Speaker 4 (16:38):
Government policy is very clear. Never back down, never admit
a mistake. That why we won over half the wars
we aught Walton and Johnson
A bad about this.
Speaker 2 (00:00):
But apparently Timu is suffering right now because of the tariffs.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Oh no, cheap crap is hurt because.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
The tariffs are so bad for these Chinese online retailers.
Suddenly American retail brick and mortar department stores like Kohal's
and Nordstrom rack or seeing a spike in sales. People
are returning to the way they used to shop instead
of going on tmu dot com.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
And you're supposed to feel bad about that.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
Yeah, everybody I've talked about TMU, they've ordered one thing
one time and it was just total crap, or it
was way off on size, or all of.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
The above, and they don't return.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
I bought a bass guitar pedal on Temu and it
gets really hot when I leave it plugged in or
turned on. And I don't know if I should do
that or not, but I have figured out it's a
cheap way to cook eggs.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
Is that right? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (00:52):
I just flip it upside down and cool. Yeah, I know,
trying to save money there, Thanks China. Chinese guys always
have great ideas always.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Passenger pleads guilty after attempting to open Oh, it's one.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
Of those Oh yeah, it happened. Wait a second.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
I don't know if you guys have heard, but we
do a special report from time to.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Time, kicked alf a plane, kicked alf a plane.
Speaker 4 (01:18):
Here's some money got kicked al a plane.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
It's a very special poorly behaved airline passenger report and
it's probably brought to you by Yay.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Haywood Harvest are friends in the Haywood Forest of northwest Georgia.
There they went and harvested some fabulous things for you
to try. And that's really all we can tell you
about it. They are all the products are legal in
all fifty states. But people within the radio station, you
(01:50):
can't decide what we should and shouldn't describe to you.
So we're just kind of leaving it up to you
to go to the website and find out for yourself.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
Yeah, go take a ganderd Hey Harvest dot com.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
And just know that because Donald Trump signed the Farm Act,
you're legally allowed to purchase their products in any state.
And any lawmaker out there that tries to overturn the
Farm Act wink wink Alabama and Lieutenant Governor Dan Patrick
of Texas.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Also Georgia, I think he is actually talking like that too.
They are anti maga. You guys are anti maga. If
you see something at the website that you like, don't
forget to add the promo.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Code w WNJ you WNJ. Today we tell you the
story of Francisco Severo Torres. This is actually an update
to a previous kicked off a play and report. You
may recall a little while back he was tackled by
fellow passengers when he freaked out on a United Airlines
flight from Los Angeles to Boston. At the time, this
(02:48):
guy stood up and people couldn't tell if he was
a Muslim or just a hippie because he had a
long beard and he had like a stocking hat on
his head.
Speaker 3 (02:55):
Did they have a mustache with the beard or was
it just beard without mustache?
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Must ash of the beer?
Speaker 3 (03:00):
Yeah, okay, now there's no mustnash.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
That's terrish. Why is that?
Speaker 2 (03:05):
I don't know, I don't know. Something they do, something
to do with eating hamas or something. No one knows. Anyway,
he threatened to kill every guy on the plane before
taking that's an exact quote, before attacking the flight attendant
in the neck with silverware.
Speaker 1 (03:17):
That's no way to treat silverware no be nice.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
Torna has admitted to one count of interference and attempted
interference for flight crew members and attendance using a dangerous weapon.
According to the Massachusetts US Attorney's Office, Lee, that's Leah Fawley.
Lea does some good work. Uh, no silverware, just like legit.
I think he had a good seat. So they gave
him a real knife and fork.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
You know what, you can get silver sporks. You can
get metal sporks. I've never seen it. Oh you had
to live Kenney. Yeah, I'll get you. Oh, I won't
give it to you, but I'll show you one.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
What would be the point of having silverware sporks? Isn't
the whole point of silverware that it's supposed to be nice?
Speaker 3 (03:55):
Well, if you have a spoon and a fork separate
on the airplane times, you know, tens of thousands of them,
that's a lot of weight on the plane. So one
utensil replacing two makes the plane lighter, and it's always
fun to eat with a spork anyway.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Well, in this case, Torres did not have a spork,
but he did have a mental health problem because apparently
about forty five minutes into the flight. An alarm went
off in the cockpit after one of the flight attendants
noticed someone was tampering with the emergency door between first
class and coach. Now, this guy was definitely a coach
guy who was not a first class guy.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
Where did he gets silverware?
Speaker 3 (04:32):
Then, first that first class he stole it from some
of the nice people up front.
Speaker 1 (04:37):
Not cool.
Speaker 2 (04:37):
Torres was confronted and then asked if he had been
caught on camera messing with the door handle.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
Turns out he had.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
The crew deemed Torres a potential threat and requested the
captain land as soon as possible. Moments later, Torres got
out of his seat and made his way to the
door again. There's a very wild video that was taken
by one of the passengers and it shows Torres look
at all distressed and incoherent ranting, claiming he was taken
over the plane and that he would kill every man
on board the plane. Fun Then Torres lunged towards the
(05:05):
flight attendant with a broken spoon while making a stabbing motion,
stab stab, stab, hitting the victim three times around the
neck and not cool. Passengers tackled him and he was
restrained with the assistance of the flight crew. He was
taken into custody when the plane landed at Logan Airport.
He told police he wanted to open the door to
jump out of the plane. He said he knew many
people would die if he did.
Speaker 3 (05:27):
Well, Jaklas kicked off a plane. This dude was trying
to kick himself off the plane and they didn't let him.
So it's the exact opposite of getting kicked off a plane.
He was not allowed to get off the plane. Now
you know this is gonna happen more thanks to Donald Trump.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
Why thanks to Trump?
Speaker 2 (05:44):
Thank you for asking, Because more often than not, these
videos you see at people behaving crazy in airports, like
remember the one about the naked woman running around.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
It was at Houston Airport.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
If you search the internet for naked woman at an airport,
oh you'll be busy. It's like watching single moms fight
at a chuck e Cheese.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
There's a lot of these videos.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Out there, and more often than not, it's because they
missed a little bit of alcohol with what anybody anybody pharmaceuticals?
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (06:10):
And what did Donald Trump do this week? Did he
do lowered the cost of pharmaceutical.
Speaker 3 (06:15):
Now they're going to be able to stock up on
cheap drugs, so they'll take twice as many probably and
then cuckoo.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
Now, the plus side is more naked chicks at the airport.
The downside is more violent dudes with beards at the airport.
And I am in favor of one and not the other. Okay, uh,
flip a coin on that one. Yeah, I mean, you know,
I guess it all evens out in the end. The
universe corrects itself. You know, there's something beautiful about a
woman's naked body, but not when she's covered in pockmarks
(06:43):
and face tattoos.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
I don't know why that is. So you're kind of choosy,
are you. Yeah, I'm about that. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
And then I don't know if you noticed, but like
one in ten of these women have a penis, and
I don't like.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
That at all. Well, you are picky.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Yeah, I'm not a fan of the women with penis thing.
I do really don't want to see them at the
airport while I'm trying I need a hot dog waiting
for my flight. No, we don't need that. Now you're
running the hot dog for me. It's like putting ketchup
on it.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
Disgusting and yet some new Naples, Italy. Have you heard
of it. I don't know if you've ever been there
or not. It looks in Naples, Florida. Yeah, same thing, Yes, exactly, sure.
Speaker 3 (07:18):
Naples, Italy was hit by a four point four magnitude earthquake.
It's what they call a major seismic swarm. They have
been having a lot of earthquakes, usually in the three
plus range, but this one was a four point four,
a little bigger. And they said that's a little bit
(07:38):
of a problem because they do have what you call
a large volcano nearby in southern Italy, and that this
earthquake thing might be a cursor of some activity from
the volcano which could then send the earth into Arctic
(07:58):
winter for god knows how many years.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
You're not even explaining the biggest problem. I mean, yeah,
the volcano. Sure, fine. But have you ever seen what
happens when you upset Italian women a little bit?
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Oh? Yes, I have.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Italian women could be very temperamental. Are you upset an
Italian woman just a little bit? It'll ruin your year,
my man.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
I don't know if we's gonna be doing a volcano
report this time of day, but there's volcano in the
Philippines already blasting itself up. I don't know the name
of it. It's Philippines, probably like four in and stuff,
but it erupted, spewed ash and smoke and blah blah
blah up two and a half miles into the sky. Worldwide,
(08:38):
there are currently active forty five volcanoes being looked at,
including that one in southern Italy and that one Philippines.
There's another one in Indonesia. Indonesia, Indonesia, they got a
bunch of them, New Zealand, Guatemala, Ecuador, they got.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
A bunch of them.
Speaker 3 (08:59):
Two. Uh, there's one up there, you know, off the
northwest coast of America.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
Well, then looking that stuff doesn't concern me as much.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
I mean, I don't know if you've ever looked into
this before, but I have Filipino women not as temperamental.
Speaker 1 (09:12):
It should be fine. So oh good, yeah, you ask.
Speaker 4 (09:15):
Government policy is very clear, never back down, never admit
a mistake.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
That's why we won over half the wars. We thought
Walton and Johnson.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
Earlier in the show, we were talking about how the
film Clockwork Hornge vividly depicts what we thought was maybe
a futuristic dysphoria. But actually, maybe the idea of brainwashing
criminals and drugging them into being better citizens isn't as
bad as we thought.
Speaker 3 (09:45):
Okay, that's something we can go with there. Let's expand
on that. That could be a better future.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
I know it was supposed to be terrifying, but maybe
we're just misjudging it, kind of like we're misjudging the
zone of death.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
How you miss judge the zone of death? I mean
aimed at that for a reason. Imagine you know what
the zone of death is? Don't you better set.
Speaker 1 (10:04):
The train station?
Speaker 3 (10:05):
Every time rep or what's your name off somebody at Yellowstone,
they take them to the train station.
Speaker 2 (10:12):
Most of our listeners who probably seen the Yellowstone TV series,
I didn't think this was a real thing. There's a
place in Yellowstone in the TV show nineteen twenty three
where they dump bodies.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
Yeah, isn't that nineteen twenty three as well? I was
going to bring that up. The modern day Yellowstone and
the one hundred year ago you know show.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
They were doing the same thing. Yesterday.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
I was lifting weight. It's at a starting strength gym,
I Shepherd lift.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
I left. You have no idea and one of.
Speaker 2 (10:39):
The guys I left with, who's telling me about the
Idaho Zone of Death. Now follow me here, follow the
bouncing ball, because this is even crazier than it sounds,
and it's gonna sound crazy. The Idaho Zone of Death
is a small area in Yellowstone National Park located in
not surprisingly in well, Idaho, Idaho, where legal loopholes make
it hard to enforce laws. Because of the there's a
(11:00):
mix up in how federal and state jurisdictions overlap. No
court has clear authority to try serious crimes like murder.
This means, in theory, someone could commit a crime there
and avoid prosecution because no one can legally hold a
trial right now.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
Law there's no law enforcement. There's no people.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
Right law enforcement still patrols. Minor crimes are actually quite
easy to handle. It's not totally lawless, but major crimes
are tricky to prosecute.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
The way they changed it up for television, because Hollywood
does things like that. They changed it up to where
it's not in Yellowstone Park. For one thing, it's that
the Montana border because that's where the show was at.
It's a little different, right, And they said there's it's
a county with zero population, so with no people, no
(11:46):
elected officials, so therefore no law. And then but in
reality they do have some law in this place.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Now, apparently this has been there right in front of
our eyes the whole time and clear plain sight, and
we didn't even realize it.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
Are you ready for me to scramble your brain? Realized it?
I saw it on TV. I realized it. I'm not
about the train station a minute. You brought it up.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
No, no, no, you're missing I saw it. You're missing the
craziest part, Billy Had. I'm about to scramble your brains
like that old anti drug ad from the nineteen eighties.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
This is your brain, and this is your brain on drugs.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
Billy Had follow the bouncing ball. It's called the Idaho
Zone of Death. Okay, I'm waiting for the gears stop,
but you look at us. It's not getting that, mister Kenneth.
You're a fashion e stuff Idaho Zone.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
I know it's odd. It's it's that clothing company they
sell it.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
Calls no Zod was the guy I think that was
chasing after the Power Rangers. If I'm not mistaken, Billy Had,
why why do you even know that? Cos I got
kids and kids that wanted to see Power Rangers when
they was little.
Speaker 1 (12:56):
No, no, no, look up on the big screen here in
the studio.
Speaker 2 (12:59):
It's a fashion Look at this isd Isod's like almost
sort of like a more budget friendly version of Polo orst.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
Was he the one with the alligator instead of a
polo horse?
Speaker 1 (13:10):
Sort of?
Speaker 2 (13:11):
Yeah, No, that was the cost. I think the cost
is the more expensive version of ISOD.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
I wish one was the alligator. That's up. No, mine
got them alligator shirts. The cost that's a cost. This
is about ISOD.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
What kind of animal they got on a shirt? Death
Zone of Death is the dead animal? It's exactly.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Yeah, it's this whole time, we've been missing out on
the fact that when you see a guy walking around
wearing AZOD and it looks like he's just a budget
friendly golf enthusiast, he is actually probably committing murder out
in the middle of Yellowstone Park and we didn't even
know about it.
Speaker 1 (13:42):
Well, when we go get him, exactly get him, Well,
what can we do. We can't prosecute the guy. We
can't do it today. We're pretty busy today.
Speaker 3 (13:49):
You know, maybe uh, Memorial Day weekend, we'll get some
extra time after I found out. Oh no, you're you're
busy running around doing all your comedy shows.
Speaker 1 (14:01):
Oh yeah, that's right.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
I'm gonna be doing stand up comedy the weekend of
Memorial Day weekend.
Speaker 3 (14:05):
That weekend of Memorial Day weekend, exactly, Yes, the weekend.
I know it sounds redundant, but it feels like it
was worth repeating. Jackson, Mississippi.
Speaker 2 (14:12):
We're gonna be their Thursday May twenty second, Friday May
twenty third, we're gonna be in Mandeville Saturday, May twenty fourth,
We're gonna be in Metaie.
Speaker 1 (14:20):
How about Dad? And you can get.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
Tickets at jesseisfunny dot com or go to my Twitter account.
Speaker 1 (14:25):
I'm Kenny Webster.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
I'm gonna be on a tour bus final link right
at the top. Yeah, we do get into tour buses.
Got a big king chives bed in the bat. It's nice, bro,
it is nice. Say no more wink as good as
a nod to a blind man.
Speaker 4 (14:38):
You know.
Speaker 2 (14:38):
After I learned about the Idaho Zone of Death, I
started doing a deep dive into the legal system up
there in the state of Idaho. Uh oh, and I
discovered this whole database of Idaho prison inmates who are
looking for love?
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Really, yeah, did you reach out? Well? I found this
one woman. Hang on, I think I think I'm in love.
Speaker 3 (15:00):
My name's Britney Valentine. I'm just looking for some new connections.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
Add me on JPay.
Speaker 3 (15:04):
My number is thirteen thirty four thirty four.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
And then she gets up, she blows a kiss, she
stands up, she turns around, she shows you her bush.
Speaker 1 (15:12):
Is she showing you the good I like, what's her name?
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Britt Everyone?
Speaker 1 (15:15):
My name is Britney.
Speaker 3 (15:15):
Oh my god, I love Brittave. I'm in love with Brittany.
You cultimoart where she said hit me up on JPay, Right, Yeah,
I looked into what that is. It's a way you
can send them money and like give them a tablet.
They can have a tablet for some reason.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
I don't know why. Now, what would you be sending
her money for? Exactly, commissary, I got it.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
When she stood up and showed you her the goods
that you owe her money for that because she looks good.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
I guess presumably if you give her a tablet, she
could use the tablet to photograph herself in compromising positions.
You think she would do something like that a prison
in may really, and it tells you what they're in
there for too, like at the bottom it'll say drug trafficking.
But the funniest one I found is this guy listen
close to what he's saying for a.
Speaker 5 (15:55):
Complete degenerate high school dropout, but absolutely nothing going for
them in this life or the day that I'm the
guy for you. My life skills include day drinking, had
a meaningless sex, playing beer pong, and sorting copious amounts
of white powder off a ceramic plate that I found
in your mom's kitchen cover. I'm not possessive or controlling,
because honestly, I don't give ah what you do.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
But whether you stay or leave a part.
Speaker 5 (16:14):
You're preoccupied with my search for more dank memes, So
you want some to talk to so you can focus
less on the fact that we're all gonna die painfully alone.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Hit me up, the guys, what kind of meat was
he looking for? Memes? Dank memes?
Speaker 3 (16:26):
He said, Okay, that is that good ones.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
Dank memes generally mean they're good memes, right as opposed
to shwag memes.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
You don't want swag memes, and I want no those
are bad man you ask.
Speaker 4 (16:38):
Government policy is very clear. Never back down, never admit
a mistake. That why we won over half the wars
we aught Walton and Johnson
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