Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Of course it happens in the city too, but we
have these massive parking garages.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
And the great thing about those massive parking.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
Garages going where you keep your car yeah oh yeah, yeah,
where people dent in your car when you park it there.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
For sure you get dents from other things.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
Besides, hey, you got neighbors you can't win, and you
got this garage here we're parked in at the radio station.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
You get a few more of those. It's true.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
I went to one of those paintless dent places over
the weekend while we were doing the comedy tour, left
my car there and I got to tell you, I
h it is a lot cheaper going to one of
those places than it is going to the regular collision
repair plays.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
Yeah, it's kind of handy. They can sometimes I can
just pop them little things out. Yeah, the old pimple
popper doctor. I was impressed by that. So comedy tour,
I hear it went well. A lot of people are
bragging on the shows into some sold out crowds. That's
pretty nice.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
It's always interesting to meet different groups of listeners you
don't normally meet, like when we go to the comic
book convention up in Shreveport. There's a group of people
there that's different than the kind of people we meet
when we hang out at a casino.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
And it's always.
Speaker 3 (01:03):
Noticeable when you go do this, that's the kind of
people when you go do that, different kind of people.
Speaker 4 (01:08):
Right.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
I had no idea until we did the comedy shows
this weekend, the relationship Themes, stand up comedy shows. We
had so many listeners who were polygamists. I had no idea.
That really surprised me. The polyamorous Polly, I guess is
what does all that means? Polly means she's probably gonna
cheat on you all. Yeah, that's a Jesse Peyton joke
(01:29):
by it.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
So since you had the what was the name of
the tour again, couples, did you save a lot of
marriages or did you create a lot of marriages? Maybe
maybe you could talk to the Clintons and the Obama's
now that you know you're a therapist, because I've heard
the Clintons and you can understand why any Obamas and
(01:50):
you can understand why they don't seem to be happily
married anymore.
Speaker 1 (01:55):
No, how about that, I didn't have that on my
BINGO card to use a cliche express shouldn't kids like
to use.
Speaker 3 (02:01):
Don't know if you can save them, but hopefully you
saved a lot of folks that showed up at the show.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
Now Tales from the road.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
Remember remember when old uh, what's his name Hank Hill
did Tales from the tour bus. Yeah, you got a
lot of backstories, stuff to tell us about what happened,
you know, behind the scenes on the bus. You got groupies.
You got like rock stars or like you groupie show
up and try to get backstage.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
Believe it or not, Billy and I don't have a
lot of groupies now we It was mostly married couples
at the comedy show, but it was very sexually liberal
married couples.
Speaker 2 (02:33):
Look out.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
They all had a story about swinging or you know,
doing butt stuff or none of my business.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
But it wasn't what I was expecting.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
I had no idea we had that many listeners that
were sexually amorous.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
Well, good to know. I always thought our listeners.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Were good Christian folk, and then this weekend I realized
Christian people have weird sex too.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
Just heard a lot of stories. Well sounds exciting.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
Yeah, you never you always think that you're a kinky
until you meet somebody who is you know what I mean.
You always think you're erotic or your life is crazy,
and then you meet somebody that's really got a crazy
sex life, and you realize you're not that interesting.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
I in a lot of those moments this weekend.
Speaker 3 (03:13):
I try real hard not to be interesting when it
comes to that part of the world.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
You know, there's some people, Billy, and when they're alone
with their partner in an intimate, relateous situation, they like
to be slapped around. They like to be violently hit
by their lover.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
Is that right. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
One of those people is the French president Emmanuel mccran.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Well, no, ain't married to a dude. Well that's what
some people sometimes.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
That's one thing I remember about him. Man, his name
starts out like mcroney, but it's not macroney, and he
seems to be attracted.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
To dudes, kind of like the you know, this situation
with Barack and Michelle in France. There's a lot of
people that think the first lady is a training Now
I'm not saying that they're really even if you don't
think that is already weird because they first met each
other when she was a forty year old woman, and
he was a high school boy, oh boy, and his
(04:08):
parents wanted to keep him away from her, so they
sent him away to boarding school. And when he finally
got done and he came home, he married that middle
aged woman.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
Couldn't get her out of his system. Huh in that
odd him whatever. That's the strangest thing.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
I want you to imagine that the president of the
United States of America. Pretend the President of the United
States of America was used to be a boy from
one of those news stories about people having sex with
their teachers. That would be crazy, right, and then grew
up to marry the teacher and then weirdly became leader
of the country.
Speaker 3 (04:39):
You know that day is probably coming considering you know,
just the odds of how many teachers are out there,
you know, knewing it with their kids.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
Sooner or later, one of them is bound to become president.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
Billy d From your mouth to God's ears, there's so
many of those news stories.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
Hope we're still around to report on it, man, come on,
bring it well. Anyway, I want you to imagine.
Speaker 1 (04:59):
That you and Praline we're in an intimate situation relation,
you know, moment there doing what two lovers do, and
all of a sudden, somebody opened the door to the
room and everybody.
Speaker 3 (05:08):
Could see what was going on inside. Whoa you mean,
like when the kids throw the door open.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
Yes, right, when you're in the middle of coitus performing
the beast to two backs making love to your wife.
Speaker 3 (05:18):
Un let's just hope we're not doing the same thing
they was doing on the Righteous gymstones when those kids
threw the door open.
Speaker 4 (05:24):
Right.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
Oh, that was an ugly, ugly scene. Fair point.
Speaker 1 (05:27):
Now, well over the weekend, that actually happened to the
president of France, a very bizarre moment when Emmanuel Macron
was shoved in the face by his wife bridget or
Bridgete or how do you say her name anyway or Bob.
I don't know what his name is anyway. They were
bickering or were they or were they getting kinky? We
don't know he is.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
There's the face to the I mean he put a
somebody put a hand, No, no, what like a slap,
because a slap should have come around from the side
and more like a stiff arm. She put a hand
in his nose, chin in his mouth and then just
pushed him away.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
It really looks like she's violently hitting him. They're standing
inside of what is essentially the French equivalent of Air
Force one. It's their president's airplane, and one of the
handlers that works for the French president opens the door
so all the paparazzi can see what's going on inside
the plane. And what they see is the French president
standing there. His wife is just behind the door, so
(06:25):
you don't quite see her. You just see her arm
shove him in the face very hard. And I don't
know if they were being kinky or erotic, or she
was trying to get some chocolate off his chin, or
if she was or the most likely explanation, she was
hitting him because she's mad at.
Speaker 3 (06:39):
The many look like she was telling him to, like
get to get out right, like the door's open, get out,
go do whatever it is you're supposed to be doing
out there, and leave me alone.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
And just then he awkwardly turns and looks and notices
that the cameras of all the world's paparazzi are taking
photos of him.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
That little guilty look on his face is the best HI.
He will HI.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
He waves so low to everybody, and then he walks
back behind the door so he can address his wife
and probably point out to her that you can't just
violently attack me in front of the media or people.
Speaker 2 (07:10):
Now that's a news story. Oh yeah, you dumb hull.
They got that.
Speaker 3 (07:13):
Yeah. I wonder what he said to her after that.
You can imagine. Yeah, yeah, so.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
You think it's a dude or what kind of seems
that way?
Speaker 1 (07:23):
It really seems that way with those forearms, very aggressive. Yeah,
he must work.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
Out atty Taco. Tuesday, Wolton then Johnson Radio Network, Billy ed,
what's going on? Wild stuff? You got there?
Speaker 3 (07:36):
Man?
Speaker 2 (07:36):
Crank mother.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
Oh yeah, we played a little club music this morning,
getting the we're getting the utes fired up.
Speaker 3 (07:42):
I appreciate that. I need something to help me get
going besides the coffee, which I've already snagged. Thanks thanks
for making that pot.
Speaker 2 (07:52):
Good morning, mister Kennis. Did you have a miraculous Memorial
Day weekend?
Speaker 3 (07:56):
It's a lovely weekend, but I don't. Yesterday, you know,
got old rainy and everything. I just couldn't get up
and get motivated, and I spent almost the whole day
just being lazy, just laying around the house, not doing much,
watching some shows and no, I just I just feel
like I mean that that rut of laziness, and I
(08:17):
want to bounce out of it, pull me up out
of this and shake me and spank me on the button,
send me out to the world.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Well, what of you do it? Like figuratively or literally
or when.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
He looked like a dog trying to get scratched on
the tail end there, dude, just give me a good boom.
Yeah no, not not happening. No, but I'll tell you what.
Speaker 1 (08:41):
I was around so many freaks this weekend that that
doesn't even shock me anymore.
Speaker 3 (08:44):
Maybe give me a good spanking like Manuel Macrone probably
gets when he gets back to that airplane later.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
I bet he does.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
Yeah, I have a new neighbor, mister Kenneth, you'll appreciate
this story.
Speaker 3 (08:54):
Uh, the stinky guy left. No, No, that guy still
lives down the hall. Yeah, the Shuriel all loving Pakistani
food cook. No, I have a new neighbor. He's a zoomer. Well,
he's not a zoomer. He's a younger millennial.
Speaker 1 (09:06):
He's in his early thirties and he's uh just moved
to Houston. He's a consultant in the energy industry, and
he and I were hanging out this weekend and he
just moved came over, said hello, had a drink with
the guy. And he was telling me how he often
will match with people on a dating app. And he says,
do you ever have this problem? I was like, what's that.
He's like, you get invited to go meet up with
an older woman on a date.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
Okay, well, and her and her husband wants to watch.
Speaker 3 (09:30):
Wants to watch what? Yeah, he wants to watch the
basketball game? No, billy, No, I said, what do you mean.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
He's like, I often am in these situations where I
am in a throupole and I was like a throe
pol you said, like you and two chicks. He's like, no,
me and some married guy and his wife. And I said,
I have never had that happen.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
That is not a situation that you would think expect
to happen, like you would ask other people, this always
happened to you two.
Speaker 2 (09:59):
That was how he puts it. It's so weird. He's
a he's a cool guy.
Speaker 1 (10:02):
I don't mean to make fun of the guy, but
he's like, yeah, I don't know. I always get in
these situations where I'm dating an older woman and her
and her husband watch to watch.
Speaker 4 (10:08):
He's like, don't you hate that? I was like, I
do not. That has never happened to me, you know,
not even one no, no, but no offense. You know,
that's fine. You know it's you do you boo boo.
But all that being said, it did remind me of
the Diddy trial. The latest update on this.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
Yeah, that's that's unfortunate. Joll Get who Kid Cutt he is.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
He's a rapper. He had this hit song a number
of years ago called Day and Night. You know, I
don't know, you've probably.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Heard it in movies before you have.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
Kid Cutty is a rapper who gave testimony at the
end of last week in the Sean Diddy Combs trial,
and he says did he broke into his home and
messed with his dog one time on Christmas?
Speaker 3 (10:48):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (10:48):
No, that's something you don't want to do. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
The forty one year old rapper was giving evidence on
day nine of the trial, talking about how he briefly
dated Sean Diddy Combs' former girlfriend cam Cassie and did
he dated for eleven years from twenty seven to twenty eighteen.
And Cassie testified that the rapper physically abused her. Well,
kid Cutty says that apparently didd he found out that
(11:11):
two of them were sleeping together, so he went over
to his house and he put a Maltov cocktail in
his Porsche, and then he locked his dog in a closet.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
To freak him out.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
Apparently he dropped Cassie off at some West Hollywood hotel,
Kitty said. Kit Cutty said he returned home and found
no one was there, but his dog had been locked
in the bathroom and it was jittery.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
Well, at least he didn't blow him up on the porch. Yeah,
that was nice.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
Kid cut He said he had initially wanted to fight
Puff Daddy, but later on he went through the reality
of the situation and he called the police. No I
heard what he said, Yeah, silly, Well, now I get it.
I thought it was funny. Cassie finished giving four days
of evidence, and then she said that apparently Combs had
threatened to blow up kid Cutty's car and hurt him
(11:56):
after he learned the two of them were, you know,
doing what two adults do in there that gal can
walk into the courtroom, I mean she had to be
in a wheelchair after what she's been through.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
And that's just two of the guys that we know of. Man,
that girls had a rough go.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
Yeah, she hooked up with some male escort called Big.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Mammoth or something. Oh boy, yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
Whenever they describe what took place there too, it doesn't
even sound real, does it?
Speaker 2 (12:24):
Know? Like, how on earth are you guys? What exactly
did you?
Speaker 3 (12:28):
All?
Speaker 1 (12:29):
Right? Well, we were at this sex party with puff Daddy.
Puff Daddy was dressed like a penguin and we were
all covered in baby oil.
Speaker 3 (12:35):
And then Big Mammoth shows up like a freak show.
I guess she put a.
Speaker 1 (12:40):
Slip and slide mat down on the floor and we
all had to slide between his legs.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
And then that's what the baby oil was for. Oh okay,
now I get it.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
And then Carl was there, the dad from Family Matters,
and he would spank you with a stick while you
were having skittles thrown into your mouth by kid cutting
it Like.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
What the hell was this? How many? How many of
these rappers are secretly gay? All of all of them,
all of them are secretly gay.
Speaker 3 (13:06):
Except apparently he's like regular. You don't care for that
diddy nonsense?
Speaker 1 (13:11):
Neither said if fifty said said he met puff Daddy
years ago, and Puff Daddy came up to him at
a party and he said, hey, man, I want to
take you shopping. And it really upset fifty cent because
he said, that's what he says to women when he's
trying to get in their pants.
Speaker 3 (13:25):
He should also probably keep calling him Diddy and not
puff Daddy, because some people might not know you still
talk about the same dude that's at the Diddy trial.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Don't Don't most people know that that's the same person.
Speaker 3 (13:36):
Most of the oldestness probably don't. I hope most of
my people probably do.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
I'm from the nineties, So to me, he'll always be
puff Daddy, even during the Diddy trial. Well, I know
he changed his name to Diddy, but I you know,
or did he We don't know. But his name was
puff Daddy in the formative years of my life, you know,
like middle school and high school.
Speaker 3 (13:56):
What are they calling it the puff Daddy trial? My
point being, you started the conversation, here's what's happened at
the Diddy trial, and then you call him puff Daddy
all the way through it.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
Look, it's kind of like how I'm Gunner's strong arm.
But I'm also a producer, Kenny, But I'm also black Smoke.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
But you're also black smoke. How did you wrap a
weekend ago? Did you wrap out a lot?
Speaker 1 (14:16):
Somebody came up to me at the early show in
Mandevilla and he had a black Smoke T shirt and
he gave it to me. Oh, that was one of
two times this weekend I took my shirt off in
front of a large group of people. Code the other
time we were in Jackson jack Frica.
Speaker 2 (14:31):
They call it. I don't know why they call it that. Yeah,
I wouldn't and it's not what I call it. That's
what they call it.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
And somebody they fell out these questions on a card,
and somebody said, make Kenny take his shirt off. And
I didn't want to, but give the people what they want,
you know, so you did kind of want to. Well,
it was hot. How'd they spell the black smoke on
your T shirt? Did they spell it right? They spelled
it the way you would assume, not like a hip
(14:56):
or whatever supposed to be laq right, that's well, I'm
not against spelling it like that.
Speaker 3 (15:02):
And then I don't know how they deal with smoke.
It was just it was just spelled regular. Yeah, they
didn't spell it with a que. Does that Does that
take away the uh? Does the urban credibility that you know?
That's a shame. After all these years, I'm still not
cool with black people.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
You still there yet? Damn it? Dad, what's on your face?
Birthday cake? I just ate a birthday cake. Nobody. They
sell them at the grocery store. You can get them
anytime you want, even if it's not your birthday. Stay
tuned for more. Waltman Johnson