Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
For all you med bastards loving the Big Show podcast
Get up even Closer on Instagram, YouTube, and TikTok for
raw targets four to seven every weekday.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
On radio heard Recare Yeah man, okay, man.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
So I had this horrendous dream last night.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
And I was.
Speaker 3 (00:25):
Doing a radio show, yes with me old mate Johnny Braff.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
All right, I mentioned him to you yesterday. Oh did
you would have been on your man?
Speaker 1 (00:34):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Maybe maybe making him break on set.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Oh yes, yeah yeah.
Speaker 3 (00:39):
But anyway, in this dream, we were doing a radio
show together.
Speaker 4 (00:45):
Oh wow, like the breakfast radio show, like replacing Manton Jerry.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
Well, he was in like the sort of town hall
almost set up where he's doing the where he's doing
the show. And I went and I was trying to
get to the show which he was doing, but I
couldn't get there, and I kept going to the wrong
place all the time.
Speaker 4 (01:05):
What was stopping you, man? You were just confused?
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Well, nothing was stopping me. I just kept going to
the wrong place and they're going, oh fuck. But anyway,
woke up.
Speaker 3 (01:16):
The anxiety just pounding through my body, the quartersol just
pulsing through me, three point thirty in the morning, and
so I was lying there for twenty minutes, going.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
Do I get up and ever durry?
Speaker 2 (01:32):
God? What did you do?
Speaker 3 (01:34):
And then I was like, no, don't get up and
have a darry. That's the worst thing you can do.
Speaker 4 (01:37):
Why aren't you giving other darts?
Speaker 3 (01:38):
And then I went no, and I went back to sleep.
And then I woke up at four thirty, same kind
of scenario. Should I get up now and have a darry?
And I went on and then sort of knotted off
again and then woke up a quarter past five, and
when I fucked this shit and when had a dorry? Yeah,
So it was a really shocking morning for old Audy
J on the sleep for how did you guys, great?
Speaker 4 (02:01):
I had a shocker. I was up late last night
because I went to a comedy show and I also
had to be up early this morning, right, and so
I and when that happens and it's for work purposes,
I always have a shocking sleep And so managed to
not off to sleep two am. It's happened. I think
I mentioned it to you guys.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Just hearing.
Speaker 4 (02:22):
On the roof, on my roof, like someone is running
across my roof something probably not someone, but I know
I say something. But it was not the noise of
a cat on my roof. It was the noise of someone.
And I'm thinking maybe the neighbors deck next door. Maybe
someone is fucking stamping. I don't know what it is,
but it's freak. It's woken myself my wife up two
weeks in a row.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
Did you go out and investigate your roof?
Speaker 2 (02:44):
I went out.
Speaker 4 (02:45):
No, Like, I didn't go outside and look up at
the roof, but I certainly got up, walked down the hallway,
had weez all nude by the way, and you know,
when the whole house is dark and you're just sort
of walking really slowly and like, oh.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
God, what's that? Is there a murderer in there?
Speaker 4 (02:58):
And then had had a drink water at the kitchen
and just like looked around. It was all good, it
was all clear, and that was all nude when I
was awake for an hour and a half after the year.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
This is out for that sort of stuff, totally, man, Yeah,
or at least take tunes because.
Speaker 3 (03:11):
In that scenario, never go out, you know, would she
be nude too?
Speaker 2 (03:16):
Equal? Right?
Speaker 4 (03:17):
No, I know, but she gets very scared.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
Yeah, I know that, but that's you know, you've got
to take the bed with a good Okay, so you
know you want equal pay and all that sort of stuff,
you've got to go outside and have a look and
risking and smacked over.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
But I also don't mind. I don't mind doing it.
Speaker 2 (03:31):
Are you.
Speaker 5 (03:32):
Yeah, we didn't go outside for a person got a
cup of water. You went outside nude? Remember I did
what that at the garbage man? The garbage at the
garbage man, totally nude. See your ours, not your ours?
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Come on, now, you wake up your your our.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
I don't get sort of in the morning. I get
so my erections sort of start around six am, right,
and then last the duration of the day. Have you
on right now?
Speaker 3 (03:59):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (03:59):
Yeah, yeah, you just it's ready to go, that's for sure. Yeah.
But that was driven by anger. Yes, you know, if
you if you're driven by fear, you're less inclined to go,
particularly naked.
Speaker 4 (04:12):
Because Matt Heath has a thing about this rop where
you can't sleep naked because if someone breaks into your
house all of a sudden, you're fighting them whilst naked.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
Yeah, I've got no problem with that. I'd rather run
the odds that you know that I'm never going to
that's never going to happen and I'll sleep comfortably for
the rest of my life. That's rather than maybe someone's
going to break in where I live. Yeah, you know
what I mean, It's like, yeah, it's not gonna happen.
And then, to be honest, if you had to fight
the naked, who goes. And also that's something that comes
(04:42):
from your parents, right. That used to be a thing
back in the day, which was always going to be
wearing something because if there's a fire or something, then
you don't want to be nude outside on the street. Yeah,
that was mothers to their daughters. Right.
Speaker 3 (04:57):
There was also that thing too about changing your under
every day just in case you get hit by a
car or something, and you don't want to be hit
by a car. And then you know, they put your
undies off and they're all dirty.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Surprising to me that that's what I had to be
said to you in order to make you weird clean
undies every day, because otherwise you're like in fuk that
it's not a common thing.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
If I'm being honest.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
That was actually in Barry Humphrey's book, so it wasn't
actually said to me, It was something I read.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
I've got to get that boy.
Speaker 4 (05:26):
He's the guy that was really a flamboyant clothes and
stuffy and dresses. Yeah, yeah, like dress because he is,
that's right.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
Yeah. The Whocky Big Show week days from four on
Radio Hurarchy.
Speaker 4 (05:45):
They Big Show Podcast.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
But I know, I don't. I mean, I wouldn't have
any qualms about finding someone nude.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
I don't want them to be nude. But I know gross,
but I don't.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
I'm not nude when I go to bed anyway.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
So somebody came in, you'd have to undressed, Yes, so
I would. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (06:02):
And in fact, if someone broke into my house and
I heard them in my lounge, I would then get there.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
I would say, oh, shout out, get your gears off,
it's on.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Yeah, And you know what I'd do.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
I'd get into the lounge where they were and I'd
slap my fatos from fire to fine.
Speaker 1 (06:17):
Gay check this weapon out, you son of a bitch.
Speaker 2 (06:20):
But you'd have a rager at that point, so that
wouldn't swing a little swing.
Speaker 4 (06:24):
All right, And it's our false love. It was just
my duck doing poos.
Speaker 3 (06:29):
Have you guys ever had anyone break into your house?
Speaker 4 (06:31):
Yeah, yep, twice. Same My first flat in Auckland, So
second flat. We all lived on the top story and
the living area, kitchen and garages on the bottom story.
So someone broke in through the garage and literally helped
themselves to everything on the bottom store. He grabbed a
coffee machine, then grabbed the keys off the counter, hopped
in my flat mate's car. We worked to the garage
(06:51):
door opening, and then they just drove off with like
a crapload of stuff.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Wow.
Speaker 4 (06:56):
And then three days later the police bold. The police
said they'd come back and try the locks because I'd
taken the carken. Yeah, and I heard them come back right,
because I was sold on edge, you know, and now
I'm very on edge. Whenever I'm doing sleeping, whenever you're doing,
I'm doing sleeping.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
Yeah, sleeping. For a long time after I set the
house on file when I was a kid, whenever i'd
leave that like years, probably over a decade, i'd leave
the house. Then I always go back and side to
make sure i'd turned everything off. Yeah. I just couldn't
even if I was in the house and go right
everything off, Yes, and i'd leave, I go back in.
(07:32):
I still do, yeah, yeah, as a result of that.
But have you got over that now it's gone now yeah.
SHP in fact always comes home and moans that I
leave the heater on in my kid's bedroom.
Speaker 3 (07:43):
I every time, I pretty much every time I leave
for work, I'll go up my path and go was
the other and on, yeah, and go back in again
because I'd rather go back in again and be sure
sure than drive to work, because I know that there's
a ninety nine point nine percent chance that the oven
isn't on.
Speaker 1 (08:03):
Yeah, but I just need to reassure my brain that
that's the cast.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
The other side of it is. Even if the oven
was on, it doesn't matter, not, yes, unless it was
like a pot of you know, the stove.
Speaker 4 (08:14):
Yeah. One of the scariest things was my old oven
had a PowerPoint on the side of it, one of
those classic and my wife was making a cast role
in our.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Slow cookery, but on top of the oven.
Speaker 4 (08:28):
I think YouTube will show that I didn't once lose
eye content from old Mogen. Neither did I didn't look
at anything either. So my wife was making something in
the slow cooker. I put it on top of the
oven when it had a shower without thinking, because she
needed to cook a pot of rice. She turned the
element on that was under the slow cooker. Good, and
I was in the in the lounge watching tally. Well,
my woman was cooking.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
That's ezy.
Speaker 4 (08:50):
So something I realized joking on YouTube.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
Take it on YouTube, but not on the audio. It
was a joke. It was joke.
Speaker 4 (09:00):
And I was sitting on the couch. I was like,
what the hell's that smell? And I went in there
and literally breathed in. It was like I was being guessed.
Dropped straight to the floor, like stop dropping. I stopped
and dropped and got low because the genuinely breathing poison breathing,
and then like crawled over and then like stood up,
unplugged the thing, the slow cooker, and turned off the oven,
(09:23):
and then got down again, opened all the doors in
the house. It was just like, holy shit, and the
complete slow cooker had melted all down the sides and
all over the curreamon and like all in the oven
and stuff.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
It was crazy. Gee. She probably would have been like
with a dinner after that, you were doing fuming.
Speaker 4 (09:37):
No, it was cooked through. So we just ended up
using some packet rice because the slow cooker was done.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
Yeah, man, so geez, shit, it was terriful.
Speaker 4 (09:48):
But have you ever just breathed in a lungs full
of poison and stopped? Then yeah, daily, yeah, and then
just dropped to the ground at five in the morning
and again yeah yeah yeah, up at five with a
radier and then let one rip.
Speaker 3 (10:06):
Yeah I have yeah, I had, I have a rager
from about one till two usually PM, and then it
then it sort of fades away.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
It fades away, Yeah, just all the energy goes out
of it.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
It actually size, doesn't it.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
It does.
Speaker 2 (10:20):
It stands to attention as of something's going to happen,
and then after about an hour, just goes.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
And it shrugs its shoulders, it does, and then just droops.
Speaker 4 (10:30):
There is when someone's trying to look tough because there's
like maybe a pretty girl or something and they're like
and then she's got yeah, you just let it all
out and then just collapses.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
Nice rage of Chat.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
Rave and Chat.
Speaker 4 (10:48):
Today Tuesday, listen to the Hurdarchy Big Show four to
seven on Radio Hurdarchy and you'll hear us.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
It's really great. Yeah. Okay, yeah, get easy