Donk is Your New Dad

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's another jubile phone frame day mornings on the twenties. Hello, Yeah,
what's up, dude? This is donk How are you?

Speaker 2 (00:15):
I'm sorry?

Speaker 1 (00:16):
Well is this this is Michael right.

Speaker 2 (00:21):
Speaking?

Speaker 1 (00:22):
Yeah, dude, this is Paul Donkler. Most people just call
me Donk though I'm sure you've heard a lot about me.
So yeah, how you doing, man.

Speaker 2 (00:31):
I'm fine, I'm sorry. I don't think I know of Paul.

Speaker 1 (00:34):
Oh well, you might just know me as a donk
because I'm sure she's talked about me quite a bit.
Have we met before, No, we have not like officially met.
That's why I'm giving you a call, because I figured
it's high time to do that. Kathy is your mom, yes,
and her and I love you very much, by the way,

(00:56):
And I'm your mom's new boyfriend, so I've figured I
would call and throw you an intro and you know,
talk about stuff if you want to talk about anything.

Speaker 2 (01:05):
You I'm sorry, did you say my mom's boyfriend?

Speaker 1 (01:10):
Yeah, dude. Uh, we've been dating pretty heavy for you know,
about a month or two, and I figured it was
time that I call him make an intro, you know,
because it's always weird and a new dad unders the picture.

Speaker 3 (01:22):
No, no, no, no, do not, Paul, listen, that's totally inappropriate.

Speaker 1 (01:29):
You okay, Well, dog wants you to know, dude that
like I respect your mom and like she is a
light of my life.

Speaker 2 (01:38):
Dude, Oh my god, what the my mom is? Sixty five?

Speaker 1 (01:44):
Yeah? Audio?

Speaker 2 (01:45):
How how are you? Man?

Speaker 3 (01:46):
How?

Speaker 1 (01:47):
Sixty five? But like spry, you know what I mean?
Like imever gross.

Speaker 2 (01:52):
Get the out. Does my mom even though you're calling
me right now.

Speaker 1 (01:56):
No, she does not, dude, Because I said I should.
She thought maybe we should do it over dinner, you know,
like an intro or whatever. But I was like, you know,
these boys, I got to get on the phone with
them right away, you know, and talk to them a
little bit, because I'm the new.

Speaker 2 (02:12):
You've already talked to my brother then? And did he
respond well to this conversation? Sound like a moron.

Speaker 1 (02:19):
I haven't called him yet. I figured i'd call you first,
you know, and then I would call him.

Speaker 2 (02:25):
Don't mother calling him. I'm going to talk to our
mom and.

Speaker 3 (02:31):
Let her know that you and I spoke on the phone,
or if you can even call having this an actual conversation.

Speaker 2 (02:36):
You sound like a moron. You anywhere knew my family.

Speaker 1 (02:40):
Okay, so I read a book recently, like on being
a new parent. I know that sometimes when like a
new dad enters the life my dad.

Speaker 2 (02:51):
Stop saying that it.

Speaker 1 (02:52):
Can be confusing for the children.

Speaker 2 (02:55):
You know, how old are you?

Speaker 1 (02:57):
Thirty two? Well, like I'm.

Speaker 2 (03:01):
Older than you, man, I don't need you in my life.

Speaker 1 (03:03):
See that can be very confusing for a young.

Speaker 2 (03:06):
Guy like you. You're not You're not my new dad.
You have to stop saying that. This creepy and annoying. Okay,
you're younger than me.

Speaker 3 (03:14):
You're just she hasn't even mentioned you, so you don't
even have to worry about doing any sort of fatherly
stuff like taking me at the dinner, of giving me
a phone call or anything like that.

Speaker 2 (03:23):
She's sixty five, She's fine if we do.

Speaker 1 (03:26):
You want to go to the park this weekend and
maybe throw the ball around, could teach you how to
hit a ball or something. You know.

Speaker 2 (03:33):
No, I don't want to play ball. I don't want
God I know how to hit a ball. I do
not want to go to the park with you. You're
just perhaps it's so annoying. This is I told her
not to get on.

Speaker 1 (03:46):
I do want to say that your mom shared with
me that you always wanted a puppy when you were younger,
and I'm willing to buy a faction said, I have
a puppy and you could have that.

Speaker 2 (03:56):
God, No, I don't want anything from you. I wanted
a puppy. That was three years ago.

Speaker 1 (04:05):
How's the new father figure in your life. I'm willing
to make that happen.

Speaker 2 (04:09):
Thank You're going to make okay.

Speaker 1 (04:12):
And then I'll just tell you that this is a
prank phone call. This is actually Jebel from The Jewel
Show doing a phone brank on you and your brother
set you up. It's a joke. What he said that
your mom just joined the dating apps and you guys
were talking about it and he wanted to freak you out.

Speaker 2 (04:28):
Oh Jesu, I can't believe. Oh God, you got me
to think that my mom was actually daying

Speaker 1 (04:35):
Me wake up every morning with Jebile phone Franks

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Host

Jubal Fresh

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