November 7, 2024 • 15 mins
On today's P1 Podcast, Eddie tells us about his daughters dance recital and the disaster that took place in the school bathroom
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Had another big night last night. Guys. Yeah, I had
another one of my daughter's dance showcases, another one this
is my life now.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
One was like a month ago.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
So that one was a dance show that was involving
other schools. You want to talk about fucking brutal. Yeah,
I mean it's not even my daughter's school. She had
like two dances I think, and that whole thing. Well,
this one was just her school, and this was like
the big one that she's been preparing for, and she
(00:34):
had multiple dances. So it was a big deal last night.
The only unfortunate thing is what do you do if
you have to take a ship? We ain't done yet.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Past year, completely uncensored and unacting filtered except for that
part the show's after show starts.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
It was quite an emotional evening last night. It was unbelievable.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
Did the emotions get your tummy?
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Maybe? I don't really know, but when going on? So
it was my daughter's big showcase. Yeah, yeah, I've been
hearing about this for a while.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Now does she I haven't heard much of you talking
about Does she practice at all at home? Are you
hearing music blaring out of her?
Speaker 1 (01:24):
She has? She so dance is her elective. So in
school she has danced every day every day, and so
she's practicing.
Speaker 4 (01:33):
Your dances there we did have we had like our
electives were like stock management tech like those were we
had that when you're like when you're in high school,
you don't want to know about the stock market or
would shop.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
But at least it seems like you could kind of
apply to real life.
Speaker 4 (01:51):
But you have some like loser teacher who was like
one grade above a sub who was you know what
I mean?
Speaker 5 (01:58):
Who was there doing the class?
Speaker 1 (02:00):
It wasn't all kinds of fun electives now like robotics. Yeah,
we didn't have, which is amazing guys like.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
All day.
Speaker 1 (02:12):
Yeah, thank you dancing. So she does dance all day,
you know, in her class, but then she has been
practicing at home in like our living room and stuff
like that. Now I'll all make myself scarce if that she.
Speaker 5 (02:26):
Doesn't go and she doesn't say, Dad, do you want
to watch?
Speaker 3 (02:29):
No, you don't have a bunch of paddles lined up
one through ten to discover to do that.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
That would that would be good, But I might discourager
because I'm a harsh judge. I come from the len
Goodman School of judgment or there's no messing about.
Speaker 5 (02:41):
Say you're kind of an untop source. Does your wife
get in there?
Speaker 1 (02:46):
Yeah, well she's a former dancer. Yeah so but you know,
like any kid, they don't really want to listen to
their parents, and so it doesn't matter if she she
my wife was a dancer and she doesn't give it.
Speaker 5 (02:56):
Your wife ever get like mad at her, like Taylor,
I said.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
One too, not like that. But she'll say to her like, oh,
you should do this, and Taylor was like, no, I
don't want to do that, and she's like, really I
was a dancer.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
That Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:12):
It was like whatever, she gets what every whatever. So yeah,
it's pretty wild. Last year she was in dance and
she was a freshman and so she was only in
two group dances, so she was barely in it. But
I had to sit through the whole thing because it
was like she was in like the second dance and
the second the last dance, so there was no skipping.
Speaker 5 (03:31):
This makes me not want to have kids.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
It was rough. Last year was really.
Speaker 5 (03:36):
Two things made me not want to have kids.
Speaker 4 (03:37):
I saw my buddy at a like seven year old
birthday party and they were like had so much fun
at Cohen's birthday. Know you fucking didn't sack You know.
Speaker 5 (03:47):
You love your bro. You didn't I have fun at
that party. I know you had face paint on. You
didn't have fun.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
Up.
Speaker 4 (03:59):
I saw that wageous and I got like, I got
like school reactions.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Like started losing am colendah.
Speaker 4 (04:08):
And then you're hearing about this two and a half
hour dance recital.
Speaker 5 (04:11):
It was between the two of them. I don't even
think I can get a bonu e her again.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Okay, listen, if if you know my daughter comes to
baseball games for my son and stuff like that, I mean, sorry, Jack,
so you're coming with me. We're going over two and
a half hours for Taylor's dance.
Speaker 5 (04:31):
She's got to do what he's got to do. So
she's not you wouldn't she does?
Speaker 4 (04:35):
She does she have to go to the games or
do you because she can't stay at home?
Speaker 1 (04:38):
Or she does? So now she really is. But I
mean in little league.
Speaker 4 (04:43):
When I was a kid, I had to go to
my sister's baton twirling recitals.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Hold on a.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
Minute, hell yeah, and there you love it.
Speaker 4 (04:54):
And there was no I feel fucking off, Jack, because
I get being the little brother having to go to
your sister's stuff.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
Oh I did, and I was laughing at him all
night and looking at him. You had to sit through this.
Speaker 4 (05:07):
And here's something that was so we didn't have, you know,
cell phones, obviously I didn't have. I didn't have a
portable play PlayStation or switch. So we had like this
this shit. You remember the first ever game Boy. We had one,
but my dad would use it and I'd have to
sit away.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
Your dad wasn't watching.
Speaker 4 (05:24):
When he when she wasn't doing anything, he wasn't. He
played football on the game boy, and I'd have to
sit there and watch it.
Speaker 5 (05:30):
He wouldn't let me play. So imagine being like eight.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
Oh god, that's pretty much. Yeah, So it was. It
was a late night. It was a long one. It
was tough, but it was better because you know, now
that my daughter is another year advanced, she is a
lot more involved. So there was naa not to forty
seven dances last night.
Speaker 5 (05:55):
I'm never having star start to finish.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
That's no joke.
Speaker 5 (05:59):
She was an forty seven.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
She was in to remember, No, she was in eight.
Oh wow, it's a lot compared to two. I'm gonna
sit through all those and only watching her in two,
so eight was a lot more, and she had a
solo I wish, I'll be honest with you, when she
got up there and it's just her spotlights on her
sobby proud, like listen, my little baby, one.
Speaker 5 (06:27):
Of those you see on SO you think you could
dance solos.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Which it was lyrical, that's what you're emotional without. Yeah,
and she's fifteen herself. I didn't breathe the entire dance
because I like praying that she doesn't fall because she's
(06:50):
not she's a little clumsy and you know whatever. So
I'm just like, oh God, please don't fall off the
stage or some horrific thing. And so, but I couldn't
help myself. I'm watching her and I'm like, oh my god,
like this is fucking wild. Fifteen year olds up, they're
doing a dance like this, and she did great. So
I was like, Okay, great whatever. The other dances were
(07:10):
a little bit more fast paced, and so I was
just more like, oh, good for her, you know whatever.
Speaker 4 (07:14):
Yeah, I would love to have seen Eddie's reaction if
she's doing this dance and all of a sudden it
turns like insane.
Speaker 5 (07:20):
Nicki Mina. She starts like torking, and it's like, what
the fuck?
Speaker 1 (07:24):
Those did happen?
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Later like Little Miss Sunshine where the girl is.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Just some fucking crazy CARDI B song, Yeah, and I
was like, what the fuck?
Speaker 5 (07:38):
When Jack was like, yeah, I support that dance.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Wild Night, Wild Night forty seven dances.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
Well, good job, daddy survive.
Speaker 1 (07:52):
Now you're right Sky. Before we went to the showcase,
we did go out to dinner. It was but again
it was just me and my wife and my son
Taylor was already there. Yeah, And so we had dinner,
no big deal. I didn't get anything crazy wings Wing Wednesday,
so I was like, okay, I'll get some favor you
know what. You did get to mix a match, so
(08:14):
I went Buffalo and Sweet Chilian. I preferred the sweet Chili.
I didn't see.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
That that's very solid. I'm just in more of a
dry rub phase right now.
Speaker 5 (08:26):
I bet you are.
Speaker 1 (08:29):
I gotta it's gotta sloppy anything. Yeah. They had I
think four different flavors. Barbecue was another one which I
skipped out of, and then they had no which I
was kind of surprised. I feel that was like some
extreme hobbianiera, which I was like, I don't want to
be not trying to die. I'm good, so, no big deal.
(08:52):
I don't think I ate anything weird and I wasn't
like nervous or anything like that. Though. We get to
the show, get to my seat, and as soon as
I sit down and we're about fifteen minutes early, I went, oh, no,
I gotta go to the bathroom. That sucks, And I go, well,
(09:12):
maybe I'll hold it because I don't even know where
I'm going to the bathroom. It's at her school. Are
the bathrooms open? I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 4 (09:20):
This was cool when I was in high school and
my dad was working in the school, so he had
like the key to like the private bath.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (09:29):
Really, i'd go by his office. Yeah, I like that.
I gotta go the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (09:35):
Oh that's amazing.
Speaker 5 (09:37):
He was cool, give everyone a hall passes. But me though,
it wasn't great.
Speaker 4 (09:42):
Okay, yeah, I don't think that's why.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
No, So I don't know what I'm gonna do. I
think can I hold it for two and a half hours.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
That's a lot of dances.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
I don't know. Intermission, I don't know when that is,
and it's it's ready, I mean, it's grumbling, it's ready.
So I'm like, fuck, I don't know what I'm gonna
do here, and so I get I get a little
nervous because I'm like, where do I go? And so
I look over to Deborah and I go, here, are
the bathrooms even open here? And she goes, yeah, I
(10:12):
think there's one like around the corner you can go to.
And I go, I go, okay, I think I gotta go,
and she's like, all right. So I get up excuse myself,
and I know I got to hurry this up because
I can't be missing any dances. So I go in
there and I'm looking around and it's weird because I'm
walking around a school campus and it's closed, you know,
(10:33):
so it's like creepy.
Speaker 5 (10:35):
It's creepy. And I look around and I see the
locks everywhere.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
It's just weird, man, weird place. And so I see
there's a boy's restroom there and it says boys on it,
which is so and the door is closed, so I'm
creeped out even more. I'm like, what is this, What's
on the other side? I don't know, man. I open
it up. Thankfully the light was on, so I'm like, okay,
and it's open, so I don't have to you know,
don't do anything weird or whatever. Yeah, but there's nobody
(11:02):
in there, and so I go, okay. I haven't been
in a school restroom in you know, fifty years. I
don't know, however many forty years, and so it was
weird being in a school restroom. Yeah, I'm like, am
I allowed.
Speaker 5 (11:14):
To be in here? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Well, And I don't know if your daughter's school is
like this, because I had to go into my daughter's actually.
Speaker 5 (11:20):
Have people working in there that wash your.
Speaker 4 (11:22):
Hands and yeah, you give you they give you men,
So sky, you know we're not like that.
Speaker 2 (11:30):
No, no, no, we don't have attendance.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
No.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
When I went in there, I had the same feeling.
It was weird.
Speaker 3 (11:36):
It was like I was nervous. And then when I
walked in, it was like a time portal where like
literally it looked like the bathrooms from back when I
was in high school.
Speaker 1 (11:44):
I'm like, do they not start smoking weed and stuff?
Speaker 3 (11:49):
Right? Cheerleaders everything felt a little bit smaller.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
I was a cheerleader.
Speaker 5 (11:55):
I thought you were a dance I was.
Speaker 2 (11:56):
Cheerleader freshman, sophomore and then dance.
Speaker 5 (11:58):
Oh and then you got real cool thoughts.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
Thank you, thank you, eat ship Betsy.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
Yeah, there went to school. This smells like fish, so weird.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
So I don't know. Okay, none of this happened.
Speaker 3 (12:17):
The attendance, but I but I can relate because I
felt it was weird. It feels weird as an adult
to go into a school bathroom.
Speaker 1 (12:26):
Yeah, so I go into a stall. Yeah, and I
have a bit of an emily situation.
Speaker 5 (12:34):
Swearing, your kids, wearing boots.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
No, none of those things. I actually will admit. I
blew up the bathroomlew.
Speaker 5 (12:41):
Was you walked down and you you walked out and
people were staring. It wasn't me.
Speaker 3 (12:45):
Yeah, my kids, you guys are referring to in case
you don't know what you're talking about.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
No, no, you did, remember because the worst saw you.
He didn't see me. That's technically a witness what you did.
Entire family, please stop doing Stop doing that because everybody poops.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
It's okay, I know, I know they do.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
Okay, everybody, we're never gonna We're never gonna get to this. Yeah. Sorry, anyway,
So I am doing my business, taking care of stuff.
When everybody's worst nightmare happens. T no, I had t pay.
That is the worst time, mamare But real quick?
Speaker 3 (13:30):
Is the TP the little like pieces of paper or
is it actually on a roll?
Speaker 1 (13:34):
Not on a roll? It's like our bathroom over here,
the stalls.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
Where it's big, like cheap stroll of toilet paper. You
can never.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
Find thousand roles to actually get a wipe. Yes, yes,
especially what Emily, does you know you really get elos?
Speaker 5 (13:51):
I didn't.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
So uh No. The worst nightmare is in the middle
of what I'm doing, I hear the door open, and
I'm like, oh no, like do I pinch this thing off? Like?
What do I do here? Now? I gotta finish, man,
because I got a recital. He get to so I
just keep letting it loose. I don't care, like whatever,
I don't care what am I supposed to. I'm sure
it's another dad out there. He gets it. He gets it,
(14:16):
and so finish my business. And I open up the
stall door and to my horror, it is a male
student and he's looking at me because I'm a grown
ass man, you know, large dude with a beard. He
just blew up his bathroom, like oh fuck, he's scared,
(14:40):
and I kind of don't blame.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
Him like Bigfoot just walk down that like, you guys
shouldn't be in there at the same time together.
Speaker 1 (14:46):
I totally agree. Yeah, and so we lock eyes and
I and I have like a scared look on my face.
He's got a scared look on his again, don't I'm
not swearing on my family or anything. He heard it.
I can't. I can't get out.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Of this tonight. No boots, you're not wearing boots.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
No, no chunky boots. No.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
No.
Speaker 1 (15:05):
Unfortunately for me and I do I do what I
consider a stupid move. I try at that point to
be cool and relatable, and I give him a.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
Nice You're not fifteen, broy.
Speaker 4 (15:25):
You're not a soft You're not trying to be to
make like a joke like I wouldn't go in there.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
No, because he didn't respond well to my own he
gave me. He gave me more scared face. I just
washed my hands real quick.
Speaker 5 (15:39):
You start talking kid lingo like I just ate in there.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
No, it's really cross, dude,
Had another big night last night. Guys. Yeah, I had
another one of my daughter's dance showcases, another one this
is my life now.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
One was like a month ago.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
So that one was a dance show that was involving
other schools. You want to talk about fucking brutal. Yeah,
I mean it's not even my daughter's school. She had
like two dances I think, and that whole thing. Well,
this one was just her school, and this was like
the big one that she's been preparing for, and she
(00:34):
had multiple dances. So it was a big deal last night.
The only unfortunate thing is what do you do if
you have to take a ship? We ain't done yet.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Past year, completely uncensored and unacting filtered except for that
part the show's after show starts.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
It was quite an emotional evening last night. It was unbelievable.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
Did the emotions get your tummy?
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Maybe? I don't really know, but when going on? So
it was my daughter's big showcase. Yeah, yeah, I've been
hearing about this for a while.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Now does she I haven't heard much of you talking
about Does she practice at all at home? Are you
hearing music blaring out of her?
Speaker 1 (01:24):
She has? She so dance is her elective. So in
school she has danced every day every day, and so
she's practicing.
Speaker 4 (01:33):
Your dances there we did have we had like our
electives were like stock management tech like those were we
had that when you're like when you're in high school,
you don't want to know about the stock market or
would shop.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
But at least it seems like you could kind of
apply to real life.
Speaker 4 (01:51):
But you have some like loser teacher who was like
one grade above a sub who was you know what
I mean?
Speaker 5 (01:58):
Who was there doing the class?
Speaker 1 (02:00):
It wasn't all kinds of fun electives now like robotics. Yeah,
we didn't have, which is amazing guys like.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
All day.
Speaker 1 (02:12):
Yeah, thank you dancing. So she does dance all day,
you know, in her class, but then she has been
practicing at home in like our living room and stuff
like that. Now I'll all make myself scarce if that she.
Speaker 5 (02:26):
Doesn't go and she doesn't say, Dad, do you want
to watch?
Speaker 3 (02:29):
No, you don't have a bunch of paddles lined up
one through ten to discover to do that.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
That would that would be good, But I might discourager
because I'm a harsh judge. I come from the len
Goodman School of judgment or there's no messing about.
Speaker 5 (02:41):
Say you're kind of an untop source. Does your wife
get in there?
Speaker 1 (02:46):
Yeah, well she's a former dancer. Yeah so but you know,
like any kid, they don't really want to listen to
their parents, and so it doesn't matter if she she
my wife was a dancer and she doesn't give it.
Speaker 5 (02:56):
Your wife ever get like mad at her, like Taylor,
I said.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
One too, not like that. But she'll say to her like, oh,
you should do this, and Taylor was like, no, I
don't want to do that, and she's like, really I
was a dancer.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
That Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:12):
It was like whatever, she gets what every whatever. So yeah,
it's pretty wild. Last year she was in dance and
she was a freshman and so she was only in
two group dances, so she was barely in it. But
I had to sit through the whole thing because it
was like she was in like the second dance and
the second the last dance, so there was no skipping.
Speaker 5 (03:31):
This makes me not want to have kids.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
It was rough. Last year was really.
Speaker 5 (03:36):
Two things made me not want to have kids.
Speaker 4 (03:37):
I saw my buddy at a like seven year old
birthday party and they were like had so much fun
at Cohen's birthday. Know you fucking didn't sack You know.
Speaker 5 (03:47):
You love your bro. You didn't I have fun at
that party. I know you had face paint on. You
didn't have fun.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
Up.
Speaker 4 (03:59):
I saw that wageous and I got like, I got
like school reactions.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Like started losing am colendah.
Speaker 4 (04:08):
And then you're hearing about this two and a half
hour dance recital.
Speaker 5 (04:11):
It was between the two of them. I don't even
think I can get a bonu e her again.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Okay, listen, if if you know my daughter comes to
baseball games for my son and stuff like that, I mean, sorry, Jack,
so you're coming with me. We're going over two and
a half hours for Taylor's dance.
Speaker 5 (04:31):
She's got to do what he's got to do. So
she's not you wouldn't she does?
Speaker 4 (04:35):
She does she have to go to the games or
do you because she can't stay at home?
Speaker 1 (04:38):
Or she does? So now she really is. But I
mean in little league.
Speaker 4 (04:43):
When I was a kid, I had to go to
my sister's baton twirling recitals.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Hold on a.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
Minute, hell yeah, and there you love it.
Speaker 4 (04:54):
And there was no I feel fucking off, Jack, because
I get being the little brother having to go to
your sister's stuff.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
Oh I did, and I was laughing at him all
night and looking at him. You had to sit through this.
Speaker 4 (05:07):
And here's something that was so we didn't have, you know,
cell phones, obviously I didn't have. I didn't have a
portable play PlayStation or switch. So we had like this
this shit. You remember the first ever game Boy. We had one,
but my dad would use it and I'd have to
sit away.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
Your dad wasn't watching.
Speaker 4 (05:24):
When he when she wasn't doing anything, he wasn't. He
played football on the game boy, and I'd have to
sit there and watch it.
Speaker 5 (05:30):
He wouldn't let me play. So imagine being like eight.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
Oh god, that's pretty much. Yeah, So it was. It
was a late night. It was a long one. It
was tough, but it was better because you know, now
that my daughter is another year advanced, she is a
lot more involved. So there was naa not to forty
seven dances last night.
Speaker 5 (05:55):
I'm never having star start to finish.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
That's no joke.
Speaker 5 (05:59):
She was an forty seven.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
She was in to remember, No, she was in eight.
Oh wow, it's a lot compared to two. I'm gonna
sit through all those and only watching her in two,
so eight was a lot more, and she had a
solo I wish, I'll be honest with you, when she
got up there and it's just her spotlights on her
sobby proud, like listen, my little baby, one.
Speaker 5 (06:27):
Of those you see on SO you think you could
dance solos.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Which it was lyrical, that's what you're emotional without. Yeah,
and she's fifteen herself. I didn't breathe the entire dance
because I like praying that she doesn't fall because she's
(06:50):
not she's a little clumsy and you know whatever. So
I'm just like, oh God, please don't fall off the
stage or some horrific thing. And so, but I couldn't
help myself. I'm watching her and I'm like, oh my god,
like this is fucking wild. Fifteen year olds up, they're
doing a dance like this, and she did great. So
I was like, Okay, great whatever. The other dances were
(07:10):
a little bit more fast paced, and so I was
just more like, oh, good for her, you know whatever.
Speaker 4 (07:14):
Yeah, I would love to have seen Eddie's reaction if
she's doing this dance and all of a sudden it
turns like insane.
Speaker 5 (07:20):
Nicki Mina. She starts like torking, and it's like, what
the fuck?
Speaker 1 (07:24):
Those did happen?
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Later like Little Miss Sunshine where the girl is.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Just some fucking crazy CARDI B song, Yeah, and I
was like, what the fuck?
Speaker 5 (07:38):
When Jack was like, yeah, I support that dance.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Wild Night, Wild Night forty seven dances.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
Well, good job, daddy survive.
Speaker 1 (07:52):
Now you're right Sky. Before we went to the showcase,
we did go out to dinner. It was but again
it was just me and my wife and my son
Taylor was already there. Yeah, And so we had dinner,
no big deal. I didn't get anything crazy wings Wing Wednesday,
so I was like, okay, I'll get some favor you
know what. You did get to mix a match, so
(08:14):
I went Buffalo and Sweet Chilian. I preferred the sweet Chili.
I didn't see.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
That that's very solid. I'm just in more of a
dry rub phase right now.
Speaker 5 (08:26):
I bet you are.
Speaker 1 (08:29):
I gotta it's gotta sloppy anything. Yeah. They had I
think four different flavors. Barbecue was another one which I
skipped out of, and then they had no which I
was kind of surprised. I feel that was like some
extreme hobbianiera, which I was like, I don't want to
be not trying to die. I'm good, so, no big deal.
(08:52):
I don't think I ate anything weird and I wasn't
like nervous or anything like that. Though. We get to
the show, get to my seat, and as soon as
I sit down and we're about fifteen minutes early, I went, oh, no,
I gotta go to the bathroom. That sucks, And I go, well,
(09:12):
maybe I'll hold it because I don't even know where
I'm going to the bathroom. It's at her school. Are
the bathrooms open? I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 4 (09:20):
This was cool when I was in high school and
my dad was working in the school, so he had
like the key to like the private bath.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (09:29):
Really, i'd go by his office. Yeah, I like that.
I gotta go the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (09:35):
Oh that's amazing.
Speaker 5 (09:37):
He was cool, give everyone a hall passes. But me though,
it wasn't great.
Speaker 4 (09:42):
Okay, yeah, I don't think that's why.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
No, So I don't know what I'm gonna do. I
think can I hold it for two and a half hours.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
That's a lot of dances.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
I don't know. Intermission, I don't know when that is,
and it's it's ready, I mean, it's grumbling, it's ready.
So I'm like, fuck, I don't know what I'm gonna
do here, and so I get I get a little
nervous because I'm like, where do I go? And so
I look over to Deborah and I go, here, are
the bathrooms even open here? And she goes, yeah, I
(10:12):
think there's one like around the corner you can go to.
And I go, I go, okay, I think I gotta go,
and she's like, all right. So I get up excuse myself,
and I know I got to hurry this up because
I can't be missing any dances. So I go in
there and I'm looking around and it's weird because I'm
walking around a school campus and it's closed, you know,
(10:33):
so it's like creepy.
Speaker 5 (10:35):
It's creepy. And I look around and I see the
locks everywhere.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
It's just weird, man, weird place. And so I see
there's a boy's restroom there and it says boys on it,
which is so and the door is closed, so I'm
creeped out even more. I'm like, what is this, What's
on the other side? I don't know, man. I open
it up. Thankfully the light was on, so I'm like, okay,
and it's open, so I don't have to you know,
don't do anything weird or whatever. Yeah, but there's nobody
(11:02):
in there, and so I go, okay. I haven't been
in a school restroom in you know, fifty years. I
don't know, however many forty years, and so it was
weird being in a school restroom. Yeah, I'm like, am
I allowed.
Speaker 5 (11:14):
To be in here? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Well, And I don't know if your daughter's school is
like this, because I had to go into my daughter's actually.
Speaker 5 (11:20):
Have people working in there that wash your.
Speaker 4 (11:22):
Hands and yeah, you give you they give you men,
So sky, you know we're not like that.
Speaker 2 (11:30):
No, no, no, we don't have attendance.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
No.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
When I went in there, I had the same feeling.
It was weird.
Speaker 3 (11:36):
It was like I was nervous. And then when I
walked in, it was like a time portal where like
literally it looked like the bathrooms from back when I
was in high school.
Speaker 1 (11:44):
I'm like, do they not start smoking weed and stuff?
Speaker 3 (11:49):
Right? Cheerleaders everything felt a little bit smaller.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
I was a cheerleader.
Speaker 5 (11:55):
I thought you were a dance I was.
Speaker 2 (11:56):
Cheerleader freshman, sophomore and then dance.
Speaker 5 (11:58):
Oh and then you got real cool thoughts.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
Thank you, thank you, eat ship Betsy.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
Yeah, there went to school. This smells like fish, so weird.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
So I don't know. Okay, none of this happened.
Speaker 3 (12:17):
The attendance, but I but I can relate because I
felt it was weird. It feels weird as an adult
to go into a school bathroom.
Speaker 1 (12:26):
Yeah, so I go into a stall. Yeah, and I
have a bit of an emily situation.
Speaker 5 (12:34):
Swearing, your kids, wearing boots.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
No, none of those things. I actually will admit. I
blew up the bathroomlew.
Speaker 5 (12:41):
Was you walked down and you you walked out and
people were staring. It wasn't me.
Speaker 3 (12:45):
Yeah, my kids, you guys are referring to in case
you don't know what you're talking about.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
No, no, you did, remember because the worst saw you.
He didn't see me. That's technically a witness what you did.
Entire family, please stop doing Stop doing that because everybody poops.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
It's okay, I know, I know they do.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
Okay, everybody, we're never gonna We're never gonna get to this. Yeah. Sorry, anyway,
So I am doing my business, taking care of stuff.
When everybody's worst nightmare happens. T no, I had t pay.
That is the worst time, mamare But real quick?
Speaker 3 (13:30):
Is the TP the little like pieces of paper or
is it actually on a roll?
Speaker 1 (13:34):
Not on a roll? It's like our bathroom over here,
the stalls.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
Where it's big, like cheap stroll of toilet paper. You
can never.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
Find thousand roles to actually get a wipe. Yes, yes,
especially what Emily, does you know you really get elos?
Speaker 5 (13:51):
I didn't.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
So uh No. The worst nightmare is in the middle
of what I'm doing, I hear the door open, and
I'm like, oh no, like do I pinch this thing off? Like?
What do I do here? Now? I gotta finish, man,
because I got a recital. He get to so I
just keep letting it loose. I don't care, like whatever,
I don't care what am I supposed to. I'm sure
it's another dad out there. He gets it. He gets it,
(14:16):
and so finish my business. And I open up the
stall door and to my horror, it is a male
student and he's looking at me because I'm a grown
ass man, you know, large dude with a beard. He
just blew up his bathroom, like oh fuck, he's scared,
(14:40):
and I kind of don't blame.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
Him like Bigfoot just walk down that like, you guys
shouldn't be in there at the same time together.
Speaker 1 (14:46):
I totally agree. Yeah, and so we lock eyes and
I and I have like a scared look on my face.
He's got a scared look on his again, don't I'm
not swearing on my family or anything. He heard it.
I can't. I can't get out.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Of this tonight. No boots, you're not wearing boots.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
No, no chunky boots. No.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
No.
Speaker 1 (15:05):
Unfortunately for me and I do I do what I
consider a stupid move. I try at that point to
be cool and relatable, and I give him a.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
Nice You're not fifteen, broy.
Speaker 4 (15:25):
You're not a soft You're not trying to be to
make like a joke like I wouldn't go in there.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
No, because he didn't respond well to my own he
gave me. He gave me more scared face. I just
washed my hands real quick.
Speaker 5 (15:39):
You start talking kid lingo like I just ate in there.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
No, it's really cross, dude,
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