August 19, 2025 • 18 mins
On today's P1 Podcast, Eddie tells us about the 20 year long journey with his wife and her making him lunch and how he finally reached his breaking point
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
If you are a long time listener of our show,
you may remember my situation that I had sort of
in the beginning of my marriage. I used to scream out,
I like my sandwich the way I like my sandwich.
(00:21):
This goes back almost twenty years now. Really, I've been
together for twenty years.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Yeah, you know, okay, because I've heard this before, but I.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Don't like my sandwich the way I like my sandwich.
What does that mean? Well, this is a situation that
has been going on for almost two decades now, where
I admit it. It's a me thing.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
You're shaking your head.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
No, Well, at some point you got to start taking accountability.
I will admit that I'm particular.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Got it?
Speaker 1 (00:52):
Is that fair? That is in particular? Especially if I'm
eating something, I want it the way I want it?
I mean? Is that crazy? You know? If you go
to a restaurant and you say I want something on
the side and they put it on top, You're not
gonna be happy right the way you ordered it. It's
not I want it the way I want it, okay.
And so if your wife makes you something and you
(01:13):
don't like the way they make it, is it okay
to say something well, I've been saying something for nearly
twenty years and it still hasn't changed. We ain't done yet.
It's time.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Yet, completely uncensored and un being filtered except for that
part the party, the show's after show starts.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Now, Eddie, why don't you just accept it or you
lose your asshole, make your own fucking sandwich.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
That's you know, a little bit of my thoughts in
some way, right, Yeah, yeah, it wasn't going to call
you a loser asshole.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
Sure.
Speaker 3 (02:01):
See, that's how I live my life, where it's like
I get the tiniest bit of pushback for my daughter,
my husband, whatever, and I'm just like, fuck it, I'm
just gonna do it myself faster. But at the same time,
you create a monster and you never solve the problem.
So it's it works, but it's not the healthiest way
to go. I'm just and you and then you harbor
(02:22):
this weird resentment every time.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
Somebody's really speaking from the heart right now, Oh yeah,
it's true.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
But I'm just saying you could solve your problem by
making your own fucking sandwich.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
But that does come with.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
Some baggs, so it's not as easy as you think.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
Here's the thing.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
What do we got awards?
Speaker 1 (02:41):
Is I do most of the cooking in our house.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
Yeah, runners are like on you mostly.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
So if somebody back then offered, well, okay, I'll make
you your lunch slash breakfast whatever it is you want
to call it, for you to take the work every day,
that's a perfect That's great. I mean, how hard is
it to make a sandwich?
Speaker 2 (03:04):
I guess for some people maybe it's hard.
Speaker 1 (03:09):
So this again goes back for the very beginning of
originally started with the way she would make my peanut
butter and jelly sandwich. Big fan of peanut butter and
jelly butter. No, no butter. We don't want to go
in that direction.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
My wife did.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Yeah, game changer und bottle man. So she the ratios
were all out of whack, how much it was just
so one time it would be like seventy was always different, Yes,
Then the next time it would be the other way.
Seventy thirty jelly.
Speaker 4 (03:44):
I like a little bit more peanut butter.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Okay, Oh do you okay?
Speaker 4 (03:47):
So I'd be okay with that.
Speaker 1 (03:49):
Seventy thirty that's crazy. Yeah, Well I don't get how
you could.
Speaker 4 (03:53):
What I don't care how you can have a different
ratio every time, like seventy thirty fifty forty eight.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
How do you do that?
Speaker 2 (04:01):
You feel like you would just be heavy handed with
the jelly.
Speaker 4 (04:04):
I feel like the way I feel like, I feel
like someone.
Speaker 1 (04:06):
Fucking with me.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
Last of that day where Eddie threw he opened a sandwich,
looked at the peanut, butter and jelly ratio and then
literally did this. He goes, She's just fucking with me
at this point, She's just fucking with me.
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Oh you know when you I'll never forget. Yeah, you
air your grievances and say this is the way I
like my sandwich. Yeah, and you think, okay, well now
I know I'm gonna do it like that every time.
It's not that never works.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
Where are you living? What ratio are you liking for
your pep.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
And mostly fifty fifty?
Speaker 2 (04:34):
But oh here we go.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
If I were to go slightly one more than the other,
like sixty forty, I would go peanut butter more than jelly.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
I think that's how I like mine too. Yeah, it's
a little bit Moreeah's I think most people.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
I think that's where I normally live. But I can't
get that it's just that's never gonna happen to make
the lunch for you when after dinner before or the
pens before after dishes are done. Is but I back
then it was always like she just would make it
(05:07):
and I wouldn't even ever have to worry about.
Speaker 4 (05:08):
Now I had that for a month.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
Yeah, it was a little bit.
Speaker 4 (05:12):
And then my wife stopped.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
Yeah, I'll never get it again. She's stopped a long
time ago. And so every once in a while, maybe
like once every two weeks, I'll say, I will say, hey,
do you think maybe you could?
Speaker 2 (05:26):
Oh, would you have to like whisper?
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Hey, beauty, you're so sweet and lovely.
Speaker 4 (05:31):
Your husband doesn't make you lunch?
Speaker 1 (05:33):
Right? No, I thought he puts together your snacks.
Speaker 3 (05:36):
There was a couple of weeks random, yeah, no, that'll
just like you guys.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
He did that for.
Speaker 3 (05:44):
Like a month and then that ended, and then I
took over putting together my own snacks.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
Oh boy, did he do your daughter's lunch? Uh?
Speaker 3 (05:52):
He used to, but now she just does it herself
in the morning.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
Really yeah wow, yeah, to figure out. Yeah, So every
once in a while ask you know, hey, do you
think you could do something for me? She will so
it's very rare.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
And now when you ask that, are you being specific?
Like do you think you could make me a turkey sandwich?
Do you think you could make me a peeb and
j or is it just could you make me a lunch?
Speaker 1 (06:17):
No. I usually have to come to the table with something,
you know, whether it be a sandwich or whether it
be cream of wheat or whatever. But most of the
time I'm just throwing it together and I'm doing it.
So it is nice, you know, to have somebody help
you out. But then when I get here and go
to eat it, it's an issue every time, every time,
(06:39):
not every once in a while, every time, and so
is becomes so much of a thing where I do
sort of just give up and just go off. All right.
I can eat this sandwich and it's not good, and
I don't like it. It's not the way I want it,
But I mean, what am I supposed to do? I
got to eat something, and so I just choke it
down and eat it, and you go, well, what's the
main issue here? Well, the main issue for most of
(07:01):
the time, if it is a turkey sandwich, if it
is a salami sandwich, cold cut sandwich, type of thing.
Deborah makes the sandwich the way she would make it
for herself, not the way I want it. Okay. So
I'm a mayo mustard guy. When it comes to whatever
cold cut sandwich. It's a very basic sandwich. Mayo mustard, cheese, turkey, cheese, salami, whatever,
(07:26):
that's it. I mean, it's too big of a pain
in the ass to do that here. Every once in
a while I will get what I call a gourmet
turkey sandwich and then in a separate bag, ye, I'll
get a slice of tomato and lettuce and whatever. But
that is twice a year now maybe, And that's only
because we have like salad stuff out and I'll go, oh, perfect,
let me get that whatever. So that's very rare, very rare.
(07:50):
So the issue is Deborah likes a minuscule layer of
mayonnaise on her sandwich. It's so dry you.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Can barely see it on the bread. You're choking right now,
of course.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
So the most minuscule, thin layer of mayonnaise and that's
all she'll put on it, Okay, skinny bitch me, I'm
like the opposite load that puppy up. I like a
lot of kime.
Speaker 4 (08:23):
I like a lot of cos I like, I use
a mustard man for a long time. Now I'm all
about the mail.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
Yeah, I get it, but I'm both and so and
I don't need to go crazy with the mustard but no, no,
but I might not want some mustard on it, but yes, yes,
and so you know I've mentioned to her many times,
you know, dry sandwich. Can we you know this is
the way I like it. I know you like it
like that and it can't get through it or she
she goes, oh, he wants more mustard. So you went
(08:50):
from a minuscule to like a tiny bit more. But
it's still fucking horrible for me. Like I want like
ten times of what you're putting on. I'm not joking,
that's all. Well yeah, like it's so dry, dude, I
hate it, Okay, and peep and Jay's I've given up
on that ago. It is what it is. So I'm
(09:10):
desperate for this sandwich. So the last time she made
me a turkey sandwich was my breaking point. Yeah, it
was one of the worst sandwiches I've ever had. It
was like two or three weeks ago. I forget it was,
and I'm like, fuck, I can't take this anymore. It's
been almost twenty years. We can't get this right. And
so I in my head and I kind of ran
it by you guys, and I said, can I say
(09:32):
to Deborah, my wife, can I show you, like a tutorial,
how I like my sandwich and then if you ever
make my sandwich, which is very rare, then you'll know
this is what I want? Is that too much to say?
And Sky was kind of like, I was a little risky.
Speaker 3 (09:49):
It's all about the approach. I felt like it could
be a good mention if like she's mid making the sandwich,
of like, oh, can I take this opportunity? But still
I felt it was a risky.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
And it turned out to be a massive mistake. So
I approached the subject and again, I know that this
is gonna be an issue because it's been an ongoing
problem for you know, eighteen years, and so I go, okay,
I gotta I gotta figure out how I'm gonna broach this. Okay,
So I take a very scared, meek, feeble approach of
(10:24):
like please you know where I go, Hey, that sandwich
you made me today? Still not really there? And she goes, oh,
I know it was probably a horrible sandwich.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
She said that.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
I go, I go, if you know it's a horrible sandwich,
why are you making me eat it?
Speaker 2 (10:46):
Did you say that?
Speaker 1 (10:47):
In my mind? Because I know I'm not going to
accomplish anything but that, And I kind of think I
said something like, why did you make a horrible sandwich?
Speaker 4 (10:59):
Doesn't make it doesn't make a lot of sense.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
No, And so there was some responsese. You know, I
was busy, I was doing something for tailoring major sandwich,
and B like, okay, okay, go. I go, well, honestly,
this time it was like so dry. I honestly threw
away most of the sandwich, and I go, would you
like me to show you exactly the ratio that I
(11:23):
would like on my sandwich? I don't think that's so like?
Am I an asshole? For so much?
Speaker 2 (11:29):
I think?
Speaker 4 (11:30):
So, okay, I have a question for Emily. Yeah, you
make a sandwich every day? Before you say anything, let
me finish. You make a sandwich every day for your
man Robert. Let's say he wants you to make it
a certain way. So he goes to you and says, hey,
can you make it this way for me? How do
we all think Emily would react.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
To it's a little bit tricky because she is the
chef of the house. But that's why he likes it,
though true. So I think if he told you I
don't want this amount of this or this amount and that,
would you be cool with that?
Speaker 2 (12:02):
I wouldn't be as extreme as you're saying. And I'm
also not being the coolest pitch on the planet. But
I'm gonna I'm gonna make it.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
Wasn't he throwing away like the sandwiches you made? Blame
them off?
Speaker 2 (12:20):
He was like, because his boss Keith at the work
would like, would like bring like tacos from and ship.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
Salads and ship Yeah, like, what's going on with two?
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Leave it in his car? I don't know what the
is going on. By the way, it's the odd situation
over there that's neither here nor there. Roberts asked me,
if I'm the kitchen making goes, hey, do you think
you could put like a lot more mustard on there?
I would be and I'd go yeah, like I'd say.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
You annoy I.
Speaker 2 (12:47):
Don't know what more pepper? He loves pepper like, it's
just what a piece of ship. That's where I'm drawing, Like,
I'll go sure.
Speaker 1 (12:55):
Like because you made him eat those massed potatoes that
one time. I think I'm addicted to it.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Hey, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (13:02):
I don't know how Sky would react, but I'm assuming
she would be annoyed. But then do it the way
he wants her to do it, because I don't.
Speaker 3 (13:10):
Because you like, My reaction would be to be annoyed.
But then I'd settle down and I'd be like, why
am I fucking annoyed? I don't have to eat it,
just make it the way you like.
Speaker 4 (13:19):
My wife would tell me to go fuck myself, throw
away the sandwich and away.
Speaker 1 (13:26):
I might act like that because you're doing me the
solid Is that why I can't have it the way
I want?
Speaker 2 (13:35):
I guess you could compare it to beggars can't be choosing.
You should be able to.
Speaker 4 (13:40):
And he's in a better situation than I am because
I don't cook at all. My wife cooks, so she
thinks she knows how I like my food, so I can't.
If I say anything, she'll just give it some dogs hungry. Yeah,
but but you like palid is a joke, But I
feel like you could say something because Dev's not.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
But again, this doesn't even have I have anything to
do with culinary expertise. It just has to do with
what I like. I can't have what I like. Isn't
this America? Okay? So it is what it is. So
it didn't go over well. She got really irritated, and
she goes, no, I don't need a tutorial, thank you
very much. I'll just put more mustard on it. And
(14:20):
I go, actually, don't want more mustard, I want more mayo,
and then they just say it went from there. As
you can see, it didn't go overwhelm. Okay. So that
was like two weeks ago, maybe three weeks ago, and
I've been scared to ask for sand much ever since.
Oh no, I'm just going hungry, okay, and I'm just
not fucks okay. So it is what it is, I know.
(14:41):
So last night comes around and I made dinner and
I did everything again as usual, and so I go, well,
I would like to have a lunch tomorrow, and I'm now,
she had dental work done yesterday. I'm going to drive
to d Cute for her to get some soft serve
ice cream because she, you know, can't eat, you know,
she can't chew. So I thought that's me doing her solid.
(15:04):
Maybe now is the time to jump and ask for
her to make me a sandwich. Okay, so I do.
I say, listen, while I'm out trying to get your
d Q, can you make me a sandwich? What do
you want? Okay?
Speaker 2 (15:24):
She doesn't sound like a parly man.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Oh so long cheese, cheese, sharp, mild short man. So
uh she makes the joke of like, okay, hopefully I'll
make it right, and I go, okay, okay, she's.
Speaker 2 (15:45):
Kind of cools.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Yeah, it was still it was still laughing gas going on. Uh.
So I don't even say anything. I'm not gonna say
the ratio I want. I'm not.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
I'm just gonna You're not gonna remind her.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
I'm gonna roll the dice. Okay. So she makes a
sandwich and I'm not going to know until the big
revealed this morning. So I can see the outer part
of the sandwich bag has like remnants of condiment. So
I know we're loaded up.
Speaker 4 (16:17):
Because she maybe out she used like a half.
Speaker 1 (16:20):
That's sort of what I'm thinking, sort of what I'm
going that's sort of what I'm thinking is going on now. Yeah,
I go, well, listen, beggars can't beat you. If you
want more condiment than less. I'd rather have a gooey
mess of a sandwich than a dry sandwich. I can't
eat a dry sandwich. It's gross to me, okay. Whereas
(16:42):
like Sky who doesn't put any condiments on her ship,
like she's the opposite. Everybody's different. Man, that's okay, man.
And so I'm like, all right, we have the sandwich
is crazy, man. So I know that this is loaded
with condiments, and I'm happy. I'm happy. I'm like, listen,
if it's if it's filling out the side of the sandwich,
I'd rather have that. I mean, it's still not exactly
(17:04):
what I want. But again, I'm not making it. I
can't say anything. It is what it is, okay. So
go to open up my sandwich. I'm like, this looks
like it's loaded with mayo and mustard, so I can't
It was a little too much mustard. But again I
don't care. And so I go and I chump into
my sandwich and I go, what the fuck? Well, now
(17:30):
I'm basically eating a condiment sandwich because I go, there's
a lot of mayo mustard in here. Not the issue.
Not the issue.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
The issue is.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
There is like one piece of salami. In my entire
that is her saying fuck you, dude, fuck you and
your sandwich, bro. So that's where I'm at now. It's
never gonna change it, man,
If you are a long time listener of our show,
you may remember my situation that I had sort of
in the beginning of my marriage. I used to scream out,
I like my sandwich the way I like my sandwich.
(00:21):
This goes back almost twenty years now. Really, I've been
together for twenty years.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Yeah, you know, okay, because I've heard this before, but I.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Don't like my sandwich the way I like my sandwich.
What does that mean? Well, this is a situation that
has been going on for almost two decades now, where
I admit it. It's a me thing.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
You're shaking your head.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
No, Well, at some point you got to start taking accountability.
I will admit that I'm particular.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Got it?
Speaker 1 (00:52):
Is that fair? That is in particular? Especially if I'm
eating something, I want it the way I want it?
I mean? Is that crazy? You know? If you go
to a restaurant and you say I want something on
the side and they put it on top, You're not
gonna be happy right the way you ordered it. It's
not I want it the way I want it, okay.
And so if your wife makes you something and you
(01:13):
don't like the way they make it, is it okay
to say something well, I've been saying something for nearly
twenty years and it still hasn't changed. We ain't done yet.
It's time.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Yet, completely uncensored and un being filtered except for that
part the party, the show's after show starts.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Now, Eddie, why don't you just accept it or you
lose your asshole, make your own fucking sandwich.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
That's you know, a little bit of my thoughts in
some way, right, Yeah, yeah, it wasn't going to call
you a loser asshole.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
Sure.
Speaker 3 (02:01):
See, that's how I live my life, where it's like
I get the tiniest bit of pushback for my daughter,
my husband, whatever, and I'm just like, fuck it, I'm
just gonna do it myself faster. But at the same time,
you create a monster and you never solve the problem.
So it's it works, but it's not the healthiest way
to go. I'm just and you and then you harbor
(02:22):
this weird resentment every time.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
Somebody's really speaking from the heart right now, Oh yeah,
it's true.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
But I'm just saying you could solve your problem by
making your own fucking sandwich.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
But that does come with.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
Some baggs, so it's not as easy as you think.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
Here's the thing.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
What do we got awards?
Speaker 1 (02:41):
Is I do most of the cooking in our house.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
Yeah, runners are like on you mostly.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
So if somebody back then offered, well, okay, I'll make
you your lunch slash breakfast whatever it is you want
to call it, for you to take the work every day,
that's a perfect That's great. I mean, how hard is
it to make a sandwich?
Speaker 2 (03:04):
I guess for some people maybe it's hard.
Speaker 1 (03:09):
So this again goes back for the very beginning of
originally started with the way she would make my peanut
butter and jelly sandwich. Big fan of peanut butter and
jelly butter. No, no butter. We don't want to go
in that direction.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
My wife did.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Yeah, game changer und bottle man. So she the ratios
were all out of whack, how much it was just
so one time it would be like seventy was always different, Yes,
Then the next time it would be the other way.
Seventy thirty jelly.
Speaker 4 (03:44):
I like a little bit more peanut butter.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Okay, Oh do you okay?
Speaker 4 (03:47):
So I'd be okay with that.
Speaker 1 (03:49):
Seventy thirty that's crazy. Yeah, Well I don't get how
you could.
Speaker 4 (03:53):
What I don't care how you can have a different
ratio every time, like seventy thirty fifty forty eight.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
How do you do that?
Speaker 2 (04:01):
You feel like you would just be heavy handed with
the jelly.
Speaker 4 (04:04):
I feel like the way I feel like, I feel
like someone.
Speaker 1 (04:06):
Fucking with me.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
Last of that day where Eddie threw he opened a sandwich,
looked at the peanut, butter and jelly ratio and then
literally did this. He goes, She's just fucking with me
at this point, She's just fucking with me.
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Oh you know when you I'll never forget. Yeah, you
air your grievances and say this is the way I
like my sandwich. Yeah, and you think, okay, well now
I know I'm gonna do it like that every time.
It's not that never works.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
Where are you living? What ratio are you liking for
your pep.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
And mostly fifty fifty?
Speaker 2 (04:34):
But oh here we go.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
If I were to go slightly one more than the other,
like sixty forty, I would go peanut butter more than jelly.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
I think that's how I like mine too. Yeah, it's
a little bit Moreeah's I think most people.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
I think that's where I normally live. But I can't
get that it's just that's never gonna happen to make
the lunch for you when after dinner before or the
pens before after dishes are done. Is but I back
then it was always like she just would make it
(05:07):
and I wouldn't even ever have to worry about.
Speaker 4 (05:08):
Now I had that for a month.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
Yeah, it was a little bit.
Speaker 4 (05:12):
And then my wife stopped.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
Yeah, I'll never get it again. She's stopped a long
time ago. And so every once in a while, maybe
like once every two weeks, I'll say, I will say, hey,
do you think maybe you could?
Speaker 2 (05:26):
Oh, would you have to like whisper?
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Hey, beauty, you're so sweet and lovely.
Speaker 4 (05:31):
Your husband doesn't make you lunch?
Speaker 1 (05:33):
Right? No, I thought he puts together your snacks.
Speaker 3 (05:36):
There was a couple of weeks random, yeah, no, that'll
just like you guys.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
He did that for.
Speaker 3 (05:44):
Like a month and then that ended, and then I
took over putting together my own snacks.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
Oh boy, did he do your daughter's lunch? Uh?
Speaker 3 (05:52):
He used to, but now she just does it herself
in the morning.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
Really yeah wow, yeah, to figure out. Yeah, So every
once in a while ask you know, hey, do you
think you could do something for me? She will so
it's very rare.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
And now when you ask that, are you being specific?
Like do you think you could make me a turkey sandwich?
Do you think you could make me a peeb and
j or is it just could you make me a lunch?
Speaker 1 (06:17):
No. I usually have to come to the table with something,
you know, whether it be a sandwich or whether it
be cream of wheat or whatever. But most of the
time I'm just throwing it together and I'm doing it.
So it is nice, you know, to have somebody help
you out. But then when I get here and go
to eat it, it's an issue every time, every time,
(06:39):
not every once in a while, every time, and so
is becomes so much of a thing where I do
sort of just give up and just go off. All right.
I can eat this sandwich and it's not good, and
I don't like it. It's not the way I want it,
But I mean, what am I supposed to do? I
got to eat something, and so I just choke it
down and eat it, and you go, well, what's the
main issue here? Well, the main issue for most of
(07:01):
the time, if it is a turkey sandwich, if it
is a salami sandwich, cold cut sandwich, type of thing.
Deborah makes the sandwich the way she would make it
for herself, not the way I want it. Okay. So
I'm a mayo mustard guy. When it comes to whatever
cold cut sandwich. It's a very basic sandwich. Mayo mustard, cheese, turkey, cheese, salami, whatever,
(07:26):
that's it. I mean, it's too big of a pain
in the ass to do that here. Every once in
a while I will get what I call a gourmet
turkey sandwich and then in a separate bag, ye, I'll
get a slice of tomato and lettuce and whatever. But
that is twice a year now maybe, And that's only
because we have like salad stuff out and I'll go, oh, perfect,
let me get that whatever. So that's very rare, very rare.
(07:50):
So the issue is Deborah likes a minuscule layer of
mayonnaise on her sandwich. It's so dry you.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Can barely see it on the bread. You're choking right now,
of course.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
So the most minuscule, thin layer of mayonnaise and that's
all she'll put on it, Okay, skinny bitch me, I'm
like the opposite load that puppy up. I like a
lot of kime.
Speaker 4 (08:23):
I like a lot of cos I like, I use
a mustard man for a long time. Now I'm all
about the mail.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
Yeah, I get it, but I'm both and so and
I don't need to go crazy with the mustard but no, no,
but I might not want some mustard on it, but yes, yes,
and so you know I've mentioned to her many times,
you know, dry sandwich. Can we you know this is
the way I like it. I know you like it
like that and it can't get through it or she
she goes, oh, he wants more mustard. So you went
(08:50):
from a minuscule to like a tiny bit more. But
it's still fucking horrible for me. Like I want like
ten times of what you're putting on. I'm not joking,
that's all. Well yeah, like it's so dry, dude, I
hate it, Okay, and peep and Jay's I've given up
on that ago. It is what it is. So I'm
(09:10):
desperate for this sandwich. So the last time she made
me a turkey sandwich was my breaking point. Yeah, it
was one of the worst sandwiches I've ever had. It
was like two or three weeks ago. I forget it was,
and I'm like, fuck, I can't take this anymore. It's
been almost twenty years. We can't get this right. And
so I in my head and I kind of ran
it by you guys, and I said, can I say
(09:32):
to Deborah, my wife, can I show you, like a tutorial,
how I like my sandwich and then if you ever
make my sandwich, which is very rare, then you'll know
this is what I want? Is that too much to say?
And Sky was kind of like, I was a little risky.
Speaker 3 (09:49):
It's all about the approach. I felt like it could
be a good mention if like she's mid making the sandwich,
of like, oh, can I take this opportunity? But still
I felt it was a risky.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
And it turned out to be a massive mistake. So
I approached the subject and again, I know that this
is gonna be an issue because it's been an ongoing
problem for you know, eighteen years, and so I go, okay,
I gotta I gotta figure out how I'm gonna broach this. Okay,
So I take a very scared, meek, feeble approach of
(10:24):
like please you know where I go, Hey, that sandwich
you made me today? Still not really there? And she goes, oh,
I know it was probably a horrible sandwich.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
She said that.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
I go, I go, if you know it's a horrible sandwich,
why are you making me eat it?
Speaker 2 (10:46):
Did you say that?
Speaker 1 (10:47):
In my mind? Because I know I'm not going to
accomplish anything but that, And I kind of think I
said something like, why did you make a horrible sandwich?
Speaker 4 (10:59):
Doesn't make it doesn't make a lot of sense.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
No, And so there was some responsese. You know, I
was busy, I was doing something for tailoring major sandwich,
and B like, okay, okay, go. I go, well, honestly,
this time it was like so dry. I honestly threw
away most of the sandwich, and I go, would you
like me to show you exactly the ratio that I
(11:23):
would like on my sandwich? I don't think that's so like?
Am I an asshole? For so much?
Speaker 2 (11:29):
I think?
Speaker 4 (11:30):
So, okay, I have a question for Emily. Yeah, you
make a sandwich every day? Before you say anything, let
me finish. You make a sandwich every day for your
man Robert. Let's say he wants you to make it
a certain way. So he goes to you and says, hey,
can you make it this way for me? How do
we all think Emily would react.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
To it's a little bit tricky because she is the
chef of the house. But that's why he likes it,
though true. So I think if he told you I
don't want this amount of this or this amount and that,
would you be cool with that?
Speaker 2 (12:02):
I wouldn't be as extreme as you're saying. And I'm
also not being the coolest pitch on the planet. But
I'm gonna I'm gonna make it.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
Wasn't he throwing away like the sandwiches you made? Blame
them off?
Speaker 2 (12:20):
He was like, because his boss Keith at the work
would like, would like bring like tacos from and ship.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
Salads and ship Yeah, like, what's going on with two?
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Leave it in his car? I don't know what the
is going on. By the way, it's the odd situation
over there that's neither here nor there. Roberts asked me,
if I'm the kitchen making goes, hey, do you think
you could put like a lot more mustard on there?
I would be and I'd go yeah, like I'd say.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
You annoy I.
Speaker 2 (12:47):
Don't know what more pepper? He loves pepper like, it's
just what a piece of ship. That's where I'm drawing, Like,
I'll go sure.
Speaker 1 (12:55):
Like because you made him eat those massed potatoes that
one time. I think I'm addicted to it.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Hey, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (13:02):
I don't know how Sky would react, but I'm assuming
she would be annoyed. But then do it the way
he wants her to do it, because I don't.
Speaker 3 (13:10):
Because you like, My reaction would be to be annoyed.
But then I'd settle down and I'd be like, why
am I fucking annoyed? I don't have to eat it,
just make it the way you like.
Speaker 4 (13:19):
My wife would tell me to go fuck myself, throw
away the sandwich and away.
Speaker 1 (13:26):
I might act like that because you're doing me the
solid Is that why I can't have it the way
I want?
Speaker 2 (13:35):
I guess you could compare it to beggars can't be choosing.
You should be able to.
Speaker 4 (13:40):
And he's in a better situation than I am because
I don't cook at all. My wife cooks, so she
thinks she knows how I like my food, so I can't.
If I say anything, she'll just give it some dogs hungry. Yeah,
but but you like palid is a joke, But I
feel like you could say something because Dev's not.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
But again, this doesn't even have I have anything to
do with culinary expertise. It just has to do with
what I like. I can't have what I like. Isn't
this America? Okay? So it is what it is. So
it didn't go over well. She got really irritated, and
she goes, no, I don't need a tutorial, thank you
very much. I'll just put more mustard on it. And
(14:20):
I go, actually, don't want more mustard, I want more mayo,
and then they just say it went from there. As
you can see, it didn't go overwhelm. Okay. So that
was like two weeks ago, maybe three weeks ago, and
I've been scared to ask for sand much ever since.
Oh no, I'm just going hungry, okay, and I'm just
not fucks okay. So it is what it is, I know.
(14:41):
So last night comes around and I made dinner and
I did everything again as usual, and so I go, well,
I would like to have a lunch tomorrow, and I'm now,
she had dental work done yesterday. I'm going to drive
to d Cute for her to get some soft serve
ice cream because she, you know, can't eat, you know,
she can't chew. So I thought that's me doing her solid.
(15:04):
Maybe now is the time to jump and ask for
her to make me a sandwich. Okay, so I do.
I say, listen, while I'm out trying to get your
d Q, can you make me a sandwich? What do
you want? Okay?
Speaker 2 (15:24):
She doesn't sound like a parly man.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Oh so long cheese, cheese, sharp, mild short man. So
uh she makes the joke of like, okay, hopefully I'll
make it right, and I go, okay, okay, she's.
Speaker 2 (15:45):
Kind of cools.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Yeah, it was still it was still laughing gas going on. Uh.
So I don't even say anything. I'm not gonna say
the ratio I want. I'm not.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
I'm just gonna You're not gonna remind her.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
I'm gonna roll the dice. Okay. So she makes a
sandwich and I'm not going to know until the big
revealed this morning. So I can see the outer part
of the sandwich bag has like remnants of condiment. So
I know we're loaded up.
Speaker 4 (16:17):
Because she maybe out she used like a half.
Speaker 1 (16:20):
That's sort of what I'm thinking, sort of what I'm
going that's sort of what I'm thinking is going on now. Yeah,
I go, well, listen, beggars can't beat you. If you
want more condiment than less. I'd rather have a gooey
mess of a sandwich than a dry sandwich. I can't
eat a dry sandwich. It's gross to me, okay. Whereas
(16:42):
like Sky who doesn't put any condiments on her ship,
like she's the opposite. Everybody's different. Man, that's okay, man.
And so I'm like, all right, we have the sandwich
is crazy, man. So I know that this is loaded
with condiments, and I'm happy. I'm happy. I'm like, listen,
if it's if it's filling out the side of the sandwich,
I'd rather have that. I mean, it's still not exactly
(17:04):
what I want. But again, I'm not making it. I
can't say anything. It is what it is, okay. So
go to open up my sandwich. I'm like, this looks
like it's loaded with mayo and mustard, so I can't
It was a little too much mustard. But again I
don't care. And so I go and I chump into
my sandwich and I go, what the fuck? Well, now
(17:30):
I'm basically eating a condiment sandwich because I go, there's
a lot of mayo mustard in here. Not the issue.
Not the issue.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
The issue is.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
There is like one piece of salami. In my entire
that is her saying fuck you, dude, fuck you and
your sandwich, bro. So that's where I'm at now. It's
never gonna change it, man,
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