September 5, 2023 • 11 mins
On today's P1 Podcast we have a story about a pilot needed to make an urgent lavatory related announcement and one of us got pretty riled up about it....take a guess who...
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Well, this is crazy. Ididn't realize Emily was on a flight recently.
I thought she was in La Costa. Apparently not. Apparently, Emily
got loose on a plane and therewas shit everywhere. We ain't done yet.
It's time for the podcast, yetcompletely uncensored and being filtered except for
(00:26):
that part part. The show's aftershow starts. Now. Please don't swear
on anybody. Please, please don'tswear this. Please, please don't swear.
Okay, listen. I can't confirmor deny that this was you.
I swear my kids on. We'renot on a plane this, No,
(00:51):
I didn't. Okay, I drove. It's about twenty minutes from here.
He's checking imodium, so how couldit be me? It was not on
a plane. Wait. As soonas I saw the headline, I my
brain immediately went to Emily. Yeah, now I don't. I don't.
I'm sorry because Thor thought that heheard me in the bathroom pooping, and
I told you, guys, itwasn't me. I've no reason to lie.
(01:12):
I swear on the life of mymother who don't. But I'm not
lying, so I could swear onwhoever. I don't accept that. I
don't accept that. Hold on aminute, you say pooping, that's an
understand Okay, into what Thor heard. It was the wildest explosive diarrhea that
(01:38):
he's ever heard. It was soit was so bad, whether or not
you that I went to the phonescreener studio because I had to wait to
see the person I hit out.I couldn't believe it. I had no
idea who was, no idea itwas. And I would say death,
(01:59):
I gotta wait. You can't waitto find out? I say, man,
we got to wait and see whothis person is. And then little
benounced to me. Emily comes walkingout. It was stunning. It was
stunning. She's attractive to hear,to hear somebody, you know, it
sounded like her intestines was coming.That didn't happen, like he concert understanding
(02:24):
everybody, understand everybody. I almostI almost called nine one one because I
didn't think she'd make it through therest of the Obviously, I fucking poop.
Everybody poops. Obviously I've had adiary before everybody else. I mean,
duh, Did I do it thatday in that bathroom at that time?
No, I swear no, No. Everybody in this room. That's
(02:49):
so I didn't do it. Thatelation the only explanation. Boots, I
heard that, I was wearing thatthe boots I heard. Everybody asked nation
and I can think, what's andthis is the only one. I wraped
my brand around this? How couldshe? Why the fuck do you care
so much? I don't think Icare so much. I think you care
(03:09):
so much. That's a good point. That's a good life of my child.
I don't know if if I woulddo something, that's something you and
if therapists have to talk about it. I think what could have happened was
I was taking I was going Iwas going to remember one I was peek
and maybe the person I heard justjust blew it up and got out of
(03:32):
there quick. And then I watchedthere. Yeah, and then Emily snuck
in there. And that's the onlyNo, that's the only explanation. He's
got enough for you. No,because I wasn't smelling when I was in
there. Maybe they sprayed you.What did I hear? Well? You
claimed she's claimed no shitting happened thatdude, Pete. Did you let some
(03:54):
gas? I don't think so,did you que? Remember? I don't
think I queeve. I think wewere talking parts. Oh yeah, it
could be louder. I don't know. Remember it's quif, Pasha, I
have said that, no, I, but it's started a quif when you're
pissing me. Yeah, it doesn'treally like queef after sex sometimes but not
like out of nowhere really sometimes.And then also it doesn't make an explosive
(04:16):
noise sound like that. I'm givingher an out though that it was somebody
else. And then she went ineverything and she's going, no, it's
not fucking trip, no very far. I care. Everyone farts, I
just don't talk about the story.Everyone farts. We are, but we're
talking about a different story. Ithought we were gonna talk about this something
that went down on a plane.Yeah, it all ties in all ties,
(04:39):
I don't think. So okay,I'll get there, sweetie, Okay,
okay, okay. Yes, thatday somebody we don't know who had
some ner never know it went crazy. We have well chronicled are upshitter did
happen. It's still it's still goingon. Remember that one day that did
(05:00):
denied that that day at least don't. Well then I believe you whoa So
that's still going on. We're stillhaving this upshitting problem. But a three
day weekend is a disaster because theydon't come in. The cleaning crew doesn't
come in on the holiday, andso coming in after a three day weekend
(05:24):
is going there sky. No,we think there's we think there's vomit in
the sink and their shit everywhere.It's like walking into a porta potty again
at burning Man, It's like andit's so extreme disgusting. Our big boss
has put a note on the door. People have bought cleaning products and left
them in there, but still theupshitter is on the loose. It is
(05:45):
madness. Okay, so we've dealtwith a lot of shitting issues here at
work, but this is one ofthe craziest, most disturbing things I've ever
heard of in my life. No, I don't I don't even know how
this is actually possible. A deltaflight is making national news. We'll probably
international news. Honestly, this happenedon Friday, the day that Emily was,
(06:10):
you know, on her girl's trip, as we we covered not I
don't think you need to bring itup like I'm still I told you I
drove my Why are you attacking herand we already heard you swearing your mom.
I know that is true. Yeah, that was creepy. So this
was a flight from Atlanta to Barcelona, Spain. No, it wasn't.
(06:30):
It wasn't. It wasn't going toSpain over the three day weekend. And
I don't think it. I don'tthink. Why wouldn't it be possible?
You can? I don't know.I feel like it takes so long to
get to Spain. To go thereand back would be probably difficult. I
don't know. I don't know.You're the one that did it. So
about two hours into the flight wehave left Atlanta, where two hours is
(06:56):
we are just getting close to hittingthe ocean at this point, so we've
Yeah, they show like the flighttracker map and they're not over the ocean
yet. I they're like they goup eddie like for some reason, they
go up and then over according tothe flight tracker cap that showed us.
So two hours in they got toturn this around and the pilot of course
(07:18):
needs to talk to air traffic controlto get permission to turn around and come
back and can do whatever you wantup there. No you can't. You
can't kid that air Traffic Control,of course, wants to know, well,
why why do you need to turnaround the plane and correct, Yes,
(07:39):
you've already sat up, And that'swhen the pilot explained, we have
a bit of a bio hazard issueon the plane. And that is when
the pilot explained further, saying,quote, we've had a passenger who's had
diarrhea all the way throughout the airplane. What are you talking about? How
(08:03):
is that possible? All all throughoutthe airplane? Did they swear on everybody
they know that it wasn't the person? Yeah, the pilot said that,
and then you hear the person inthe background, I swear my kids,
pilot didn't do it. I didn'tdo it. If you're telling the truth,
(08:24):
you don't swearing your kids. Iswear my mom, I didn't do
it. This is horrendous. Nowthey've been asked for more details, but
say that it is quote a medicalissue, so they cannot get in the
bathroom, then stay in them inthere, walking around everywhere. I don't
know. I don't know if they'retrying to get help. I don't know
(08:46):
if they were like losing it andintentionally trying to get their diarrhea everywhere.
I don't know, okay, butthey had to fly back to Atlanta.
Did the pilot say anything to likethe people, they're shit on my play?
I don't know. He just ranin crazy incidents. Maybe what would
(09:11):
he tell the shitter get off myplay? He pushes him out at wouldn't
you everywhere? Yes, now Idid have an incident, not me,
but when travel with children. Speakingof kids, when you travel with children
sometimes, especially if they're super young, they can have potty incidents. And
(09:37):
I'll never forget this. We wereflying and I think it was Jack and
he was super little, so he'sstill in diapers and whatever, and he
had a shit. He was theupshitter because his shit went somehow up the
back he had him. He hada massive blowout and you can just feel.
And we were at the point wherewe were locked in so you I
(10:00):
couldn't get up, and so Ilook over and I smell and I'm like,
oh God, this is not good. What are we going to do?
Did you ask housing for it?I didn't. I didn't ask,
but I don't eve been okay withit. So we had to sit there
for I don't know, like twentyminutes until we could get to the point
(10:20):
of where we could get up andit was everywhere, dude, and it
was like horrifying, horrifying, Yeah, because that gets so message and you're
like, what do you do?What do you do? Yeah? So
a similar situation on that. That'scrazy, don't Yeah. So an eight
hour delay for the people on thisflight, plus whatever they had to see
(10:41):
and smell and step around and allof that. No word if Delta is
offering any sort of anywhere on aplane, Yeah, dude, how do
you handle that? I wouldn't beable to. I don't know what I
do know I would Okay, really, I mean I didn't see anything.
I do you see? You havea look at your eyes. Boo
Well, this is crazy. Ididn't realize Emily was on a flight recently.
I thought she was in La Costa. Apparently not. Apparently, Emily
got loose on a plane and therewas shit everywhere. We ain't done yet.
It's time for the podcast, yetcompletely uncensored and being filtered except for
(00:26):
that part part. The show's aftershow starts. Now. Please don't swear
on anybody. Please, please don'tswear this. Please, please don't swear.
Okay, listen. I can't confirmor deny that this was you.
I swear my kids on. We'renot on a plane this, No,
(00:51):
I didn't. Okay, I drove. It's about twenty minutes from here.
He's checking imodium, so how couldit be me? It was not on
a plane. Wait. As soonas I saw the headline, I my
brain immediately went to Emily. Yeah, now I don't. I don't.
I'm sorry because Thor thought that heheard me in the bathroom pooping, and
I told you, guys, itwasn't me. I've no reason to lie.
(01:12):
I swear on the life of mymother who don't. But I'm not
lying, so I could swear onwhoever. I don't accept that. I
don't accept that. Hold on aminute, you say pooping, that's an
understand Okay, into what Thor heard. It was the wildest explosive diarrhea that
(01:38):
he's ever heard. It was soit was so bad, whether or not
you that I went to the phonescreener studio because I had to wait to
see the person I hit out.I couldn't believe it. I had no
idea who was, no idea itwas. And I would say death,
(01:59):
I gotta wait. You can't waitto find out? I say, man,
we got to wait and see whothis person is. And then little
benounced to me. Emily comes walkingout. It was stunning. It was
stunning. She's attractive to hear,to hear somebody, you know, it
sounded like her intestines was coming.That didn't happen, like he concert understanding
(02:24):
everybody, understand everybody. I almostI almost called nine one one because I
didn't think she'd make it through therest of the Obviously, I fucking poop.
Everybody poops. Obviously I've had adiary before everybody else. I mean,
duh, Did I do it thatday in that bathroom at that time?
No, I swear no, No. Everybody in this room. That's
(02:49):
so I didn't do it. Thatelation the only explanation. Boots, I
heard that, I was wearing thatthe boots I heard. Everybody asked nation
and I can think, what's andthis is the only one. I wraped
my brand around this? How couldshe? Why the fuck do you care
so much? I don't think Icare so much. I think you care
(03:09):
so much. That's a good point. That's a good life of my child.
I don't know if if I woulddo something, that's something you and
if therapists have to talk about it. I think what could have happened was
I was taking I was going Iwas going to remember one I was peek
and maybe the person I heard justjust blew it up and got out of
(03:32):
there quick. And then I watchedthere. Yeah, and then Emily snuck
in there. And that's the onlyNo, that's the only explanation. He's
got enough for you. No,because I wasn't smelling when I was in
there. Maybe they sprayed you.What did I hear? Well? You
claimed she's claimed no shitting happened thatdude, Pete. Did you let some
(03:54):
gas? I don't think so,did you que? Remember? I don't
think I queeve. I think wewere talking parts. Oh yeah, it
could be louder. I don't know. Remember it's quif, Pasha, I
have said that, no, I, but it's started a quif when you're
pissing me. Yeah, it doesn'treally like queef after sex sometimes but not
like out of nowhere really sometimes.And then also it doesn't make an explosive
(04:16):
noise sound like that. I'm givingher an out though that it was somebody
else. And then she went ineverything and she's going, no, it's
not fucking trip, no very far. I care. Everyone farts, I
just don't talk about the story.Everyone farts. We are, but we're
talking about a different story. Ithought we were gonna talk about this something
that went down on a plane.Yeah, it all ties in all ties,
(04:39):
I don't think. So okay,I'll get there, sweetie, Okay,
okay, okay. Yes, thatday somebody we don't know who had
some ner never know it went crazy. We have well chronicled are upshitter did
happen. It's still it's still goingon. Remember that one day that did
(05:00):
denied that that day at least don't. Well then I believe you whoa So
that's still going on. We're stillhaving this upshitting problem. But a three
day weekend is a disaster because theydon't come in. The cleaning crew doesn't
come in on the holiday, andso coming in after a three day weekend
(05:24):
is going there sky. No,we think there's we think there's vomit in
the sink and their shit everywhere.It's like walking into a porta potty again
at burning Man, It's like andit's so extreme disgusting. Our big boss
has put a note on the door. People have bought cleaning products and left
them in there, but still theupshitter is on the loose. It is
(05:45):
madness. Okay, so we've dealtwith a lot of shitting issues here at
work, but this is one ofthe craziest, most disturbing things I've ever
heard of in my life. No, I don't I don't even know how
this is actually possible. A deltaflight is making national news. We'll probably
international news. Honestly, this happenedon Friday, the day that Emily was,
(06:10):
you know, on her girl's trip, as we we covered not I
don't think you need to bring itup like I'm still I told you I
drove my Why are you attacking herand we already heard you swearing your mom.
I know that is true. Yeah, that was creepy. So this
was a flight from Atlanta to Barcelona, Spain. No, it wasn't.
(06:30):
It wasn't. It wasn't going toSpain over the three day weekend. And
I don't think it. I don'tthink. Why wouldn't it be possible?
You can? I don't know.I feel like it takes so long to
get to Spain. To go thereand back would be probably difficult. I
don't know. I don't know.You're the one that did it. So
about two hours into the flight wehave left Atlanta, where two hours is
(06:56):
we are just getting close to hittingthe ocean at this point, so we've
Yeah, they show like the flighttracker map and they're not over the ocean
yet. I they're like they goup eddie like for some reason, they
go up and then over according tothe flight tracker cap that showed us.
So two hours in they got toturn this around and the pilot of course
(07:18):
needs to talk to air traffic controlto get permission to turn around and come
back and can do whatever you wantup there. No you can't. You
can't kid that air Traffic Control,of course, wants to know, well,
why why do you need to turnaround the plane and correct, Yes,
(07:39):
you've already sat up, And that'swhen the pilot explained, we have
a bit of a bio hazard issueon the plane. And that is when
the pilot explained further, saying,quote, we've had a passenger who's had
diarrhea all the way throughout the airplane. What are you talking about? How
(08:03):
is that possible? All all throughoutthe airplane? Did they swear on everybody
they know that it wasn't the person? Yeah, the pilot said that,
and then you hear the person inthe background, I swear my kids,
pilot didn't do it. I didn'tdo it. If you're telling the truth,
(08:24):
you don't swearing your kids. Iswear my mom, I didn't do
it. This is horrendous. Nowthey've been asked for more details, but
say that it is quote a medicalissue, so they cannot get in the
bathroom, then stay in them inthere, walking around everywhere. I don't
know. I don't know if they'retrying to get help. I don't know
(08:46):
if they were like losing it andintentionally trying to get their diarrhea everywhere.
I don't know, okay, butthey had to fly back to Atlanta.
Did the pilot say anything to likethe people, they're shit on my play?
I don't know. He just ranin crazy incidents. Maybe what would
(09:11):
he tell the shitter get off myplay? He pushes him out at wouldn't
you everywhere? Yes, now Idid have an incident, not me,
but when travel with children. Speakingof kids, when you travel with children
sometimes, especially if they're super young, they can have potty incidents. And
(09:37):
I'll never forget this. We wereflying and I think it was Jack and
he was super little, so he'sstill in diapers and whatever, and he
had a shit. He was theupshitter because his shit went somehow up the
back he had him. He hada massive blowout and you can just feel.
And we were at the point wherewe were locked in so you I
(10:00):
couldn't get up, and so Ilook over and I smell and I'm like,
oh God, this is not good. What are we going to do?
Did you ask housing for it?I didn't. I didn't ask,
but I don't eve been okay withit. So we had to sit there
for I don't know, like twentyminutes until we could get to the point
(10:20):
of where we could get up andit was everywhere, dude, and it
was like horrifying, horrifying, Yeah, because that gets so message and you're
like, what do you do?What do you do? Yeah? So
a similar situation on that. That'scrazy, don't Yeah. So an eight
hour delay for the people on thisflight, plus whatever they had to see
(10:41):
and smell and step around and allof that. No word if Delta is
offering any sort of anywhere on aplane, Yeah, dude, how do
you handle that? I wouldn't beable to. I don't know what I
do know I would Okay, really, I mean I didn't see anything.
I do you see? You havea look at your eyes. Boo
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