February 21, 2023 • 23 mins
This unknown quote is so good: “It's okay to be a glow stick. Sometimes we need to break before we shine.”
The Four Agreements:
Be impeccable with your word.
Don't take anything personally.
Don't make assumptions.
Always do your best.
Listener emails from Taylor (about encouragement) and Laney (sharing book recommendations!)
A celebrity once ate potatoes for two weeks straight as they opened up about the pressures society puts on bodies, so this got Amy & Kat talking about all the different ways to eat potatoes, and what their last meals would be before they die??
Speaking of dying…Alexander the Great’s three dying wishes are inspiring:
Only the very best doctors should carry my coffin: To show that even the best doctors are powerless to cure in front of death.
Scatter my wealth on the road to the graveyard: So everybody can see that riches gotten on earth, stay on earth.
Leave my hand hanging in the wind for everyone to see: To show we are born empty-handed and we leave empty-handed.
POP-UP SHOP FOR HAITI. Details & RSVP HERE!
Link to ‘4 Things’ LIVE in Nashville at Franklin Theater:
https://secure.franklintheatre.com/websales/pages/info.aspx?evtinfo=370547~cfe40b7d-1c56-4c4b-b937-600bdd7c5904
Thank you licensed therapist, Kat Defatta, for joining us with her wisdom. You can find her on Instagram: @Kat.Defatta+ @YouNeedTherapyPodcast.
Best places to find more about Amy: RadioAmy.com + @RadioAmy
Send emails for the '5th Thing' to 4ThingsWithAmyBrown@gmail.com
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Happy Tuesday. Welcome to the fifth Thing. I'm Amy and
I'm Cat. And today's quote, Well, before we get to it,
did you get engaged? You would have known if I
got engaged. People. We talked about it last week, so
when you were in I think I manifested it to
not happen. Okay, So I'm gonna get engaged tomorrow. Maybe
I'll get engaged tomorrow. Okay, all right, our quote is
(00:26):
unknown today, and it's okay to be a glow stick.
Sometimes we need to break before we shine. It's good. Huh. Yeah,
I need that like framed somewhere. But I can I
have a quote I want to share? Yes? Okay. So
are you familiar with the four Agreements the book? Okay,
it's a great book. I don't know why I feel
(00:46):
like at certain times in my life as a therapist,
my career as a therapist, certain things pop up at me.
I've known about this book forever, but the past couple
of weeks I keep going back to share this one
part of the book with client after client client. So
I feel like it's in the air that people need
to hear this. I just talked about it with a
coworker the other day. It's either before the Bobby Bone
(01:08):
Show or maybe even after the show. We were talking
and I just said, hey, don't take that personally. Like
we just I think we need to do a lot
more of that. And she was like, oh, yeah, that's good.
I said, oh, it's one of the four Agreements. And
she had not heard of it the book, and so
I told her to get it read it. Well. I
feel like when you say, like, don't take that personally,
people are like, it is personal. It felt very personal,
(01:29):
But I what I'm about to read helps explain why
that really isn't personal, right, But I know the case
of what was going on, and it really wasn't personal.
It was It's almost like the story that I'm telling
myself in my head is and it's just not accurate.
So I was there to tell her, do not take
that personal. Wait, what did you hear about the book?
Years ago? And I read it most of it on
(01:50):
an airplane some trip that I had, and I should
revisit it, absolutely, because I don't even think I finished it.
But I know the four agreements, not even I know, okay,
so but I want everybody to hear now comes from
one of the four Agreements, which is, don't take things personally,
and the author wrote, whatever happens around you, don't take
(02:10):
it personally. Nothing other people do is because of you.
It is because of themselves. All people live in their
own dream, in their own mind. There in a completely
different world from the one that we live in. When
we take something personally, we make the assumption that they
know what's going on in our world, and then we
try to impose our world on their world. Ye, so
(02:34):
freaking good to be like your universe is we are
not seeing the same one. I feel like you brought
a very serious quote and I brought be a glowstick.
You've got a break before you shine. And then you're like,
have you read the very serious book the Four Agreements
that talks about how you should just live. Do these
(02:55):
four things and you will have a good life. What
are they? Be impeccable to your word? Don't things personally.
Always do your best is the last one. And don't
make assumptions. Don't make so hard, but that the assumptions
is also it's personal leads into the yeah, you're assuming
that it's personal, and then always do your best. And
I feel like sometimes we don't give ourselves credit for
(03:18):
what we're doing, and we are hard on ourselves, and
we really should just acknowledge as long as we've done
our best, Pat yourself on the back, high five yourself
in the mirror, and I like out Mel the do
you want to explain the game that if we have
new listeners, but if you've been around for a while,
(03:40):
you know, anytime I mentioned Mel Robbins or her five
second role or high fiving yourself in the mirror or whatever,
you can take a shot of your coffee, of your
water of tequila. Whatever. It's our drinking game that we
have here because I mentioned her a lot. But I'm
putting her out there because someone get her as a
guest on the podcast one day. Putting that out there,
(04:02):
it's going to happen. Can I read an email? Now? Yeah?
All right, So we have an email from Taylor and
this is to you Amy. She says, Hi, Amy, I
just wanted to email you and encourage you. I listened
to your podcast and to the Bobby Benge. Okay, okay,
hold on stop. That's why I was having you read
this email because she's very email touched me. Okay, So
(04:25):
I'm just going to preface it with this email meant
so much to me. But it also I've learned some
emails are hard for me to hear or read back
because then I feel as though I'm saying something about myself,
but I'm not. The emailer is. But then I want
to share it too, because this is such a beautiful
example of encouragement, and you might be able to do
(04:46):
this with one of your kids, a friend, a loved one.
Like if you notice something it's taking the time never
suppress a generous thought which came from one of our
listener emails, and she had a thought to email me
and encourage me, and I thought that was very special.
So Carrie, so this is also you working on hearing
(05:07):
good things about yourself and letting other people know that
people are saying good things about you, because you normally
would start reading this big never mind, I edited a
little bit. I took out a few things. Okay, all right,
I just wanted to email you and encourage you. I
listened to your podcast and the Bobby Bounce Show, and
recently you seem so much more like yourself. I know
(05:28):
you went through some really hard times and that we
as listeners don't know details about all of that, but
I just have to say I really hope that you're
making it through to the other side, because it sure
seems like you are lighter and brighter. I'm a glow stick.
I had to break the shine. You're trying to be
lighter and brighter. I'm like, let's bring the mood down. Okay.
(05:49):
I'll be cooking or cleaning, listening to the show or
podcast and hear your laugh or a comment. It's like,
I'm a really proud friend, Like, there she is. She's
back heat. Not that you were gone, but I am
happy to hear the pep in your step, so to speak.
I have no clue what you went through behind the
scenes and the work that you did to walk through it,
(06:11):
but I just had to encourage you and acknowledge what
I'm hearing. Also, I'm really happy that you're doing more
live shows. My husband is a pilot in the Navy
and we are currently stationed in Virginia Beach, so I'm
hoping you'll do a show near me on the East coast.
Your friend Taylor from Virginia, which thank you, Taylor, is
very very thoughtful of you to take the time and
(06:31):
also to be a cheerleader for me in your own
home while you're doing your own thing. And I feel
like it's also this emails representation of how we can
cheer our friends on, not just like sending encouragement, Hey
I noticed this, but actually getting excited for your friends
and if they're doing something cool, being excited for them.
I feel like one of the best things we can
do as a friend or a loved one to be like,
(06:52):
oh my gosh, you're doing that and cheering, cheering, truly cheering.
What I hear in this too is I love that
she's like, I don't really know everything that's going on,
but I want you to know that I noticed that
I'm seeing you again, and I don't need to know
the details, but I just want you to know that
whatever you're doing to move through, what you're doing, we
see it and it's working, because sometimes you're like, is
(07:14):
this ever gonna work? Because you know all of the
details and all of the stuff. So I think that
I had um I've been working on it, especially even
the Bobby Bones Show, for example, there were times I
know I was bringing some of my negative energy into
the room or into the podcast room or into what
I was doing, and so that's what was the energy
(07:35):
was even going through the microphone, through the air waves.
And now I'm trying to be so intentional about bringing
a higher not low h high vibes, not low vibes,
and so I hope that that is going through and
if it is, that's really cool because it shows how
impactful our energy is, not even just to the people
(07:56):
in the room, but people listening like that could be
thousands of miles of way but feeling that. So thank
you Taylor and the East Coast. We I think we're
working on Boston, but that's the only thing east that
could potentially happen at the moment if we take the
show on the road to other places. I just had
(08:17):
a moment when you said that. I was like, Boston
is not on the East Coast. For sure, is on
the East Coast. I was like, Boston, you were just
in New York. It's not that far. I just imagined
Boston by Vegas, but Boston is very close to New York. Okay,
definitely shouldn't have opened my mouth and said that that's
the stuff I should keep to myself. Let's move on. Okay,
(08:40):
I have an email from Laney. She said, Hey, Amy,
and Catt. I heard you ask for book recommendations on
the podcast, So here are some of my recent favorites.
Behind Closed Doors, The Breakdown, and The Therapist. So that's
three books by the same author. BA Paris, The Paper
Palace by Miranda Callie Heller and if you're cheesy for
romance things We Never Got Over by Lucy Score. I
(09:02):
hope you enjoy them. Your friend Laney in Connecticut, which
Connecticut is on the East coast at and I love
that she just sprattled off some books that she's been
loving and I thought, well, I'm just going to read
this to Eryl in case anybody else is looking for
a good book to read, which someone had just asked
me in a recording that I was doing, Paula Faris.
(09:23):
She asked me what my favorite fiction book is, and
it was a Rapid Fire, and I mean it was
her thing, so I had to really be We tried
to do Rapid Fire here and we ramble, but I
was like, oh, and I was like Hunger Games and
it really is one of my favorite fiction books ever.
But I felt very two. I couldn't have thought of
(09:43):
something more current, but it was your favorite, it is, Yeah,
so I'm okay with the answer, But you like The
Hunger Games better than Seven Husbands of Evelent Hugo. Yes, okay,
I guess me too. But you looked at me like
I was a stupid question. Well, yeah, I mean that
was a good book. I mean we did you read
The Patient? Did you read The Patient? The Silent Patient?
(10:14):
It's fiction, it's fiction. Yeah, how are you? How's Harry
Potter going? Well, I'm not reading Harry Potter, I'm listening,
which if anybody that listening is reading in a way,
if you're consuming a book these days audible as I
feel like I can't say i'm reading it. Okay, what
do you say, I'm listening to it? Fine? Okay, so
(10:35):
but I'm not even exaggerating. It is the best audio
book that I think has ever been created. The guy
Jim Dale that he's an actor, but he reads the
book and he plays every character. I'm more fascinated. Don't
know either if it's from him his reading or from
the writing. But I'm on book four. Good for you.
I said I wanted to I wanted to listen to
(10:57):
All seven this year, and I was like, I probably
won't be able to do that, But I'm on book four. However,
book three one through three, we're all less than nine
hours book for is. Did you ever read Twilight? No? Okay,
but that's kind of how I felt with Harry Potter.
I was like, I'm not reading that since I feel
like this is a podcast from the Yeah, we're talking
(11:22):
Hunger Twilight. Harry Potter, have you read this new book Twilight.
It's really good. I think they're gonna make movies. I'm
forty one years old and I'm thinking about reading Twilight
for the first time. But it's one of those books.
I grew up going to a very fundamentalist type Christian church,
and I remember some of the kids in the youth
(11:44):
group were reading it. I was already out of the
youth group, but I was still going to the church
as a young adult, and they were in trouble, like
they weren't. They were banning it from the because the
vampires in love. I don't know, but I was like
later in life, once I really became into my own
person and realized like, oh, there's nothing wrong, but I
(12:04):
guess like white raft and like stuff like you know, yeah, anyway, Twilight,
Twilight books one through three, we should definitely go back
to Laney's book recommendations because they're more currents. Okay, but
the Silent Patient, Okay, you give that good job. Yeah,
Robert Pattins said, it made me think we were talking
(12:24):
about Twilight. How you had sent me that thing the
other day about how he ate potatoes two weeks straight
to lose weight. Just potatoes. Yeah, which is a weird choice, right.
I think it was just potatoes and sea salt. And
I did a little more research after you sent it,
and I was trying to read the article, and he
said he's tried every diet fad on the planet for
all for roles. Just I you know what I wonder
(12:48):
when it comes to actors, whether it's a male or female,
how the like process of them either gaining or losing
weight for roles, how that really affects later in life
their relationship with food. And I think we mainly only
pay attention to that with women. Well, Matthew McConaughey did it.
He talks about in his book green Light, green Light.
(13:11):
That's that's another more current book. But I didn't. I
started reading that book, I couldn't finish it. Well, I
was listening to it on audible and just finish it.
Because but now anytime, that's anytime I say green light,
anytime I see a green light, I hear Matthew McConaughey's
voice in my head green light. That's exactly how I
(13:31):
hear it forever, and I can't undo it. But do
it again, green light, green light. He would say that
with this, like you said the first time, you said
it a little different, like green light green light. Well,
I don't know, I like the different. I know I
like the different. It all sounds like him. I'm sure
did it a little different in the book, But that's
(13:53):
just how I hear it in my head because he
would have red lights, and then it seems as though
he would get this smile when he would talk about
a green light and be like, green lights, what what
do you think it space looks like when you says
red light? Well, I don't know that one doesn't stick
in my head like the green light. Because the book
is called green Light. I think he said way more
green lights than he did red lights. Anyway, back to
(14:14):
Matthew Conney, and he did a very specific diet for
Dallas Buyers Club and he ate very limited foods Eddie
on the Bobby Bones Show. Did it after he read
the book for like several weeks and lost weight, But
there's no way he's going to maintain it. And it
just again, that is going to affect how you view food.
I imagine if I ate potatoes for only for a
(14:37):
period of time, I would not want to eat potatoes.
If you could, if you had to only eat one
food for the rest of your life, you had love
these kinds of questions. What what would it be? But wait,
I might pick potato. You can have French fries. You
can have baked potatoes, so you can have mashed potatoes,
roasted no chi, isn't no key from a potato? You
put other ingredients in it. I don't know. I was
(15:00):
just asking me a questions. I would take this game
up because because I guess to that point, if you
eat a French fry, can you have salt? Yeah, you
can use scowled potatoes. You can have roasted potatoes. You
can have boiled potatoes. That's what Robert did. That's like
a that's a mashed potato, boiled potato, boiled potatoes, and
(15:20):
then you mash it, but you then you put butter in.
I would I would pick potatoes your last meal, like
when you die. If you're dying and you know what
are you going to choose to eat? Can I mix
and match? Okay, so there's no rules. Okay, Okay, this
is stressful because it's like I'm not craving anything, but
(15:41):
I imagine that this was what I would want. So
I would to have for a beverage, I don't I've
ever used the word beverage before, but to drink, I
would have a diet coke from McDonald's. Then I would
call thank you. Then I would like to have French
fries probably I feel rapid fire right now, so like,
(16:01):
off the top of my head, Chick fil A, but
some people really don't like their French fries. I love them.
Then I would have chicken palm with some pasta for
the meal, and then I would have French chicken farm.
I really would like a Caesar salad as well. I
love Caesar salad um with some really good croutons um.
(16:24):
And then I want for dessert, I would like carrot cake,
but I would like the carrot cake from j Alexander's
Warm with some vanilla ice cream okay, and maybe a
cup of pepper bin tea after work. Can I help
me digressed all of that? Okay, I guess I would
do a diet coke again. I mine doesn't have to
be McDonald's if they do have a good one. I
(16:45):
could take sonic. I could take diet cook out of
a can. I could take really, yeah, a can, not
a bottle. Yeah, the bottles can over ice. And then
I would do Mexican food. I'd have queso, I'd have nachos,
I'd have rice and beans and all the things. And
then for dessert, I don't really know. I would have
(17:08):
probably a mixture of kick cats and reeses mashed together
and baked into a cookie or like crumble cookies. That's
what I have. So anyway, it's just it's like, you
don't have to think too hard on this. It's just like,
and it can change over time. I would like to
reserve the right to change that if I ever do
have to have a last meal. Okay. Noted which Stashia
(17:30):
was learning about Alexander the Great my daughter, and it
makes me that we were talking about death. It made
me think of he had three dying wishes, and one
of them was that all the best doctors carry his coffin,
and that was representative of that even the best doctors,
if you've so you're surrounded by them, you can still die.
(17:52):
And then he wanted his money scattered in the street,
like his coins, like scattered on the way to his
grave site, to show that all the that you acquire,
the riches or the money that you have, you leave
and it stays on earth. So he's not taking it
with him versus people that would like bury themselves with
(18:13):
all of their in like a tomb, with all of
their right the Egyptians. Yeah, I mean, I guess he
wouldn't like that. And then I think the third one
was maybe they chopped off his hand. Third wish and
like hung it somewhere empty handed for people to see
that it's empty again with that same thinking of you
(18:33):
arrive into the world empty handed and you leave the
world empty handed, so it just hangs there. So and
I when Cishia and I were talking about it, she
was like, man, I wish I was there to scoop
up all those coins, like that was her takeaway, And
I thought, oh gosh, like no, this is a valuable
(18:56):
and there's a valuable lesson. And in his last three
dying wishes. Yeah, I think I learned that I didn't either.
I'm learning so much from my daughter being in high school.
Do you think that if you went back to school.
I think about this with history. I wish I could
go back to school and tell myself to pay attention,
because when you're in high school, you're like, I have
to take this history test about whatever war, and now
(19:19):
I'm like always on Google being like what happened in
the Civil War. It's like I should have paid attention. Yeah,
I feel like I felt that way when I went
to d C for the first time, as I do.
Some people got to take field trips as kids or
their their parents took them because they're one of an
educational vacation. I never went until my late twenties, and
(19:40):
I was so fascinated with everything in d C. And
I felt like I was learning so much and I
was soaking it up, and I thought, Ah, if I
could have just come here when I was in junior
higher high school, I would have, if it would have
been more interested and soaked up more and learned more. Maybe,
I mean, maybe I wouldn't have, But for me, I
had had that exact same thought, and I know I
(20:01):
want to go back and learn. I wish I would
have paid more attention in English and writing and all
the different things, like I have no idea when to
use a comma or not or yeah, I just you know,
it's called commas for dummies. I like to just go.
(20:22):
I think it's called like an it's something with an E. Right,
I have no idea. I didn't know it was a thing.
I thought I wish to stressed me not knowing what
to do, so I just did and then continue on,
continue on. So that's what I do. Okay. Yeah, So
I hope y'all are having the day that you need
(20:44):
to have, whatever that looks like for you. Cat, Where
can people find you on Instagram at Cat dot de
fata and at you Need Therapy. You can also listen
do you Need Therapy wherever you listen podcasts and I'm
at Radio am Me. You can also up radio amy
dot com for details about the pop up shop and
(21:06):
hopefully what's up there is if if you're coming to
town for the Four Things Live on March, which the
pop up shop will be on which is like a
happy hour pop up shop for Haiti that we're doing
selling all kinds of four things, a Spua pimp and
joy merch. All proceeds going to the orphanage or I
adopted my kids from and then there will be drinks
and hanging out and whatnot at restore. But the details
(21:28):
would be well here at Radio Amy. You can go
to my bio and I did a link tree, so
I got the link tree working in from the link tree,
you can get to the website and maybe I'll just
add in the link tree the direct link direct link
to the blog that has the pop up shop info
and then also awhere to eat info. So speaking of food,
(21:50):
because some people are traveling in. There's someone coming from
Alaska and California, Texas, there's a few a few others.
I don't know. If you're coming from somewhere else, let
me know. I would love to know where you're coming from.
But I'm putting together a list of hotels, food, things
to do. Because the show, you're either coming to the
three pm or the seven pm. So you've got all
(22:10):
day Saturday. You may have all day Sunday, you may
have all day Friday. But Friday, from four to seven
you're gonna be the pop up job. I want to
send you my personal to I already wrote the blog,
but do you want me to add I'm sure they're
in there, Okay, Like what could you have included that
I wouldn't have. You don't think that I know cool things,
but I mean, I'm sure I included because too. And
(22:33):
I'm also yeah, yeah, yeah, I got it. I wouldn't
say I'm that cool, but I did. I did research, Okay,
I trust you. I did my research of like where
I like to go in my own head, and then
I did internet research of like what are some of
the top places in Nashville, what gets the best reviews?
What's the fun things to do in Franklin? If you
wanted to go out to Arrington Vineyards already headed south
(22:55):
if you want to, which is something that I've done
multiple times, but I don't always think of that off
the head, Like if some is coming to Nashville, I
don't say, oh, you should check out Harrington, but you should.
It's owned by Kicks and Brooks or is it both
of them? I because I don't, Yeah, one of them,
one of them. And it's beautiful. You could take a picnic.
You don't even have to drink wine. You cannot bring
(23:17):
your own alcohol, though learned that the hard way you
have to buy. You brought your own wine to a
wine ory, we brought a different cocktail thing like not
wine but that either. Okay, that's it makes more sense. Yeah,
we thought, well, we'll buy wine and have that as
an option, but also have other cocktail situation for people
that don't like wine. But it's been your so nope,
(23:37):
they want you to drink their wine or you can
just drink water. Yeah, all right, have the day you
need to have
Happy Tuesday. Welcome to the fifth Thing. I'm Amy and
I'm Cat. And today's quote, Well, before we get to it,
did you get engaged? You would have known if I
got engaged. People. We talked about it last week, so
when you were in I think I manifested it to
not happen. Okay, So I'm gonna get engaged tomorrow. Maybe
I'll get engaged tomorrow. Okay, all right, our quote is
(00:26):
unknown today, and it's okay to be a glow stick.
Sometimes we need to break before we shine. It's good. Huh. Yeah,
I need that like framed somewhere. But I can I
have a quote I want to share? Yes? Okay. So
are you familiar with the four Agreements the book? Okay,
it's a great book. I don't know why I feel
(00:46):
like at certain times in my life as a therapist,
my career as a therapist, certain things pop up at me.
I've known about this book forever, but the past couple
of weeks I keep going back to share this one
part of the book with client after client client. So
I feel like it's in the air that people need
to hear this. I just talked about it with a
coworker the other day. It's either before the Bobby Bone
(01:08):
Show or maybe even after the show. We were talking
and I just said, hey, don't take that personally. Like
we just I think we need to do a lot
more of that. And she was like, oh, yeah, that's good.
I said, oh, it's one of the four Agreements. And
she had not heard of it the book, and so
I told her to get it read it. Well. I
feel like when you say, like, don't take that personally,
people are like, it is personal. It felt very personal,
(01:29):
But I what I'm about to read helps explain why
that really isn't personal, right, But I know the case
of what was going on, and it really wasn't personal.
It was It's almost like the story that I'm telling
myself in my head is and it's just not accurate.
So I was there to tell her, do not take
that personal. Wait, what did you hear about the book?
Years ago? And I read it most of it on
(01:50):
an airplane some trip that I had, and I should
revisit it, absolutely, because I don't even think I finished it.
But I know the four agreements, not even I know, okay,
so but I want everybody to hear now comes from
one of the four Agreements, which is, don't take things personally,
and the author wrote, whatever happens around you, don't take
(02:10):
it personally. Nothing other people do is because of you.
It is because of themselves. All people live in their
own dream, in their own mind. There in a completely
different world from the one that we live in. When
we take something personally, we make the assumption that they
know what's going on in our world, and then we
try to impose our world on their world. Ye, so
(02:34):
freaking good to be like your universe is we are
not seeing the same one. I feel like you brought
a very serious quote and I brought be a glowstick.
You've got a break before you shine. And then you're like,
have you read the very serious book the Four Agreements
that talks about how you should just live. Do these
(02:55):
four things and you will have a good life. What
are they? Be impeccable to your word? Don't things personally.
Always do your best is the last one. And don't
make assumptions. Don't make so hard, but that the assumptions
is also it's personal leads into the yeah, you're assuming
that it's personal, and then always do your best. And
I feel like sometimes we don't give ourselves credit for
(03:18):
what we're doing, and we are hard on ourselves, and
we really should just acknowledge as long as we've done
our best, Pat yourself on the back, high five yourself
in the mirror, and I like out Mel the do
you want to explain the game that if we have
new listeners, but if you've been around for a while,
(03:40):
you know, anytime I mentioned Mel Robbins or her five
second role or high fiving yourself in the mirror or whatever,
you can take a shot of your coffee, of your
water of tequila. Whatever. It's our drinking game that we
have here because I mentioned her a lot. But I'm
putting her out there because someone get her as a
guest on the podcast one day. Putting that out there,
(04:02):
it's going to happen. Can I read an email? Now? Yeah?
All right, So we have an email from Taylor and
this is to you Amy. She says, Hi, Amy, I
just wanted to email you and encourage you. I listened
to your podcast and to the Bobby Benge. Okay, okay,
hold on stop. That's why I was having you read
this email because she's very email touched me. Okay, So
(04:25):
I'm just going to preface it with this email meant
so much to me. But it also I've learned some
emails are hard for me to hear or read back
because then I feel as though I'm saying something about myself,
but I'm not. The emailer is. But then I want
to share it too, because this is such a beautiful
example of encouragement, and you might be able to do
(04:46):
this with one of your kids, a friend, a loved one.
Like if you notice something it's taking the time never
suppress a generous thought which came from one of our
listener emails, and she had a thought to email me
and encourage me, and I thought that was very special.
So Carrie, so this is also you working on hearing
(05:07):
good things about yourself and letting other people know that
people are saying good things about you, because you normally
would start reading this big never mind, I edited a
little bit. I took out a few things. Okay, all right,
I just wanted to email you and encourage you. I
listened to your podcast and the Bobby Bounce Show, and
recently you seem so much more like yourself. I know
(05:28):
you went through some really hard times and that we
as listeners don't know details about all of that, but
I just have to say I really hope that you're
making it through to the other side, because it sure
seems like you are lighter and brighter. I'm a glow stick.
I had to break the shine. You're trying to be
lighter and brighter. I'm like, let's bring the mood down. Okay.
(05:49):
I'll be cooking or cleaning, listening to the show or
podcast and hear your laugh or a comment. It's like,
I'm a really proud friend, Like, there she is. She's
back heat. Not that you were gone, but I am
happy to hear the pep in your step, so to speak.
I have no clue what you went through behind the
scenes and the work that you did to walk through it,
(06:11):
but I just had to encourage you and acknowledge what
I'm hearing. Also, I'm really happy that you're doing more
live shows. My husband is a pilot in the Navy
and we are currently stationed in Virginia Beach, so I'm
hoping you'll do a show near me on the East coast.
Your friend Taylor from Virginia, which thank you, Taylor, is
very very thoughtful of you to take the time and
(06:31):
also to be a cheerleader for me in your own
home while you're doing your own thing. And I feel
like it's also this emails representation of how we can
cheer our friends on, not just like sending encouragement, Hey
I noticed this, but actually getting excited for your friends
and if they're doing something cool, being excited for them.
I feel like one of the best things we can
do as a friend or a loved one to be like,
(06:52):
oh my gosh, you're doing that and cheering, cheering, truly cheering.
What I hear in this too is I love that
she's like, I don't really know everything that's going on,
but I want you to know that I noticed that
I'm seeing you again, and I don't need to know
the details, but I just want you to know that
whatever you're doing to move through, what you're doing, we
see it and it's working, because sometimes you're like, is
(07:14):
this ever gonna work? Because you know all of the
details and all of the stuff. So I think that
I had um I've been working on it, especially even
the Bobby Bones Show, for example, there were times I
know I was bringing some of my negative energy into
the room or into the podcast room or into what
I was doing, and so that's what was the energy
(07:35):
was even going through the microphone, through the air waves.
And now I'm trying to be so intentional about bringing
a higher not low h high vibes, not low vibes,
and so I hope that that is going through and
if it is, that's really cool because it shows how
impactful our energy is, not even just to the people
(07:56):
in the room, but people listening like that could be
thousands of miles of way but feeling that. So thank
you Taylor and the East Coast. We I think we're
working on Boston, but that's the only thing east that
could potentially happen at the moment if we take the
show on the road to other places. I just had
(08:17):
a moment when you said that. I was like, Boston
is not on the East Coast. For sure, is on
the East Coast. I was like, Boston, you were just
in New York. It's not that far. I just imagined
Boston by Vegas, but Boston is very close to New York. Okay,
definitely shouldn't have opened my mouth and said that that's
the stuff I should keep to myself. Let's move on. Okay,
(08:40):
I have an email from Laney. She said, Hey, Amy,
and Catt. I heard you ask for book recommendations on
the podcast, So here are some of my recent favorites.
Behind Closed Doors, The Breakdown, and The Therapist. So that's
three books by the same author. BA Paris, The Paper
Palace by Miranda Callie Heller and if you're cheesy for
romance things We Never Got Over by Lucy Score. I
(09:02):
hope you enjoy them. Your friend Laney in Connecticut, which
Connecticut is on the East coast at and I love
that she just sprattled off some books that she's been
loving and I thought, well, I'm just going to read
this to Eryl in case anybody else is looking for
a good book to read, which someone had just asked
me in a recording that I was doing, Paula Faris.
(09:23):
She asked me what my favorite fiction book is, and
it was a Rapid Fire, and I mean it was
her thing, so I had to really be We tried
to do Rapid Fire here and we ramble, but I
was like, oh, and I was like Hunger Games and
it really is one of my favorite fiction books ever.
But I felt very two. I couldn't have thought of
(09:43):
something more current, but it was your favorite, it is, Yeah,
so I'm okay with the answer, But you like The
Hunger Games better than Seven Husbands of Evelent Hugo. Yes, okay,
I guess me too. But you looked at me like
I was a stupid question. Well, yeah, I mean that
was a good book. I mean we did you read
The Patient? Did you read The Patient? The Silent Patient?
(10:14):
It's fiction, it's fiction. Yeah, how are you? How's Harry
Potter going? Well, I'm not reading Harry Potter, I'm listening,
which if anybody that listening is reading in a way,
if you're consuming a book these days audible as I
feel like I can't say i'm reading it. Okay, what
do you say, I'm listening to it? Fine? Okay, so
(10:35):
but I'm not even exaggerating. It is the best audio
book that I think has ever been created. The guy
Jim Dale that he's an actor, but he reads the
book and he plays every character. I'm more fascinated. Don't
know either if it's from him his reading or from
the writing. But I'm on book four. Good for you.
I said I wanted to I wanted to listen to
(10:57):
All seven this year, and I was like, I probably
won't be able to do that, But I'm on book four. However,
book three one through three, we're all less than nine
hours book for is. Did you ever read Twilight? No? Okay,
but that's kind of how I felt with Harry Potter.
I was like, I'm not reading that since I feel
like this is a podcast from the Yeah, we're talking
(11:22):
Hunger Twilight. Harry Potter, have you read this new book Twilight.
It's really good. I think they're gonna make movies. I'm
forty one years old and I'm thinking about reading Twilight
for the first time. But it's one of those books.
I grew up going to a very fundamentalist type Christian church,
and I remember some of the kids in the youth
(11:44):
group were reading it. I was already out of the
youth group, but I was still going to the church
as a young adult, and they were in trouble, like
they weren't. They were banning it from the because the
vampires in love. I don't know, but I was like
later in life, once I really became into my own
person and realized like, oh, there's nothing wrong, but I
(12:04):
guess like white raft and like stuff like you know, yeah, anyway, Twilight,
Twilight books one through three, we should definitely go back
to Laney's book recommendations because they're more currents. Okay, but
the Silent Patient, Okay, you give that good job. Yeah,
Robert Pattins said, it made me think we were talking
(12:24):
about Twilight. How you had sent me that thing the
other day about how he ate potatoes two weeks straight
to lose weight. Just potatoes. Yeah, which is a weird choice, right.
I think it was just potatoes and sea salt. And
I did a little more research after you sent it,
and I was trying to read the article, and he
said he's tried every diet fad on the planet for
all for roles. Just I you know what I wonder
(12:48):
when it comes to actors, whether it's a male or female,
how the like process of them either gaining or losing
weight for roles, how that really affects later in life
their relationship with food. And I think we mainly only
pay attention to that with women. Well, Matthew McConaughey did it.
He talks about in his book green Light, green Light.
(13:11):
That's that's another more current book. But I didn't. I
started reading that book, I couldn't finish it. Well, I
was listening to it on audible and just finish it.
Because but now anytime, that's anytime I say green light,
anytime I see a green light, I hear Matthew McConaughey's
voice in my head green light. That's exactly how I
(13:31):
hear it forever, and I can't undo it. But do
it again, green light, green light. He would say that
with this, like you said the first time, you said
it a little different, like green light green light. Well,
I don't know, I like the different. I know I
like the different. It all sounds like him. I'm sure
did it a little different in the book, But that's
(13:53):
just how I hear it in my head because he
would have red lights, and then it seems as though
he would get this smile when he would talk about
a green light and be like, green lights, what what
do you think it space looks like when you says
red light? Well, I don't know that one doesn't stick
in my head like the green light. Because the book
is called green Light. I think he said way more
green lights than he did red lights. Anyway, back to
(14:14):
Matthew Conney, and he did a very specific diet for
Dallas Buyers Club and he ate very limited foods Eddie
on the Bobby Bones Show. Did it after he read
the book for like several weeks and lost weight, But
there's no way he's going to maintain it. And it
just again, that is going to affect how you view food.
I imagine if I ate potatoes for only for a
(14:37):
period of time, I would not want to eat potatoes.
If you could, if you had to only eat one
food for the rest of your life, you had love
these kinds of questions. What what would it be? But wait,
I might pick potato. You can have French fries. You
can have baked potatoes, so you can have mashed potatoes,
roasted no chi, isn't no key from a potato? You
put other ingredients in it. I don't know. I was
(15:00):
just asking me a questions. I would take this game
up because because I guess to that point, if you
eat a French fry, can you have salt? Yeah, you
can use scowled potatoes. You can have roasted potatoes. You
can have boiled potatoes. That's what Robert did. That's like
a that's a mashed potato, boiled potato, boiled potatoes, and
(15:20):
then you mash it, but you then you put butter in.
I would I would pick potatoes your last meal, like
when you die. If you're dying and you know what
are you going to choose to eat? Can I mix
and match? Okay, so there's no rules. Okay, Okay, this
is stressful because it's like I'm not craving anything, but
(15:41):
I imagine that this was what I would want. So
I would to have for a beverage, I don't I've
ever used the word beverage before, but to drink, I
would have a diet coke from McDonald's. Then I would
call thank you. Then I would like to have French
fries probably I feel rapid fire right now, so like,
(16:01):
off the top of my head, Chick fil A, but
some people really don't like their French fries. I love them.
Then I would have chicken palm with some pasta for
the meal, and then I would have French chicken farm.
I really would like a Caesar salad as well. I
love Caesar salad um with some really good croutons um.
(16:24):
And then I want for dessert, I would like carrot cake,
but I would like the carrot cake from j Alexander's
Warm with some vanilla ice cream okay, and maybe a
cup of pepper bin tea after work. Can I help
me digressed all of that? Okay, I guess I would
do a diet coke again. I mine doesn't have to
be McDonald's if they do have a good one. I
(16:45):
could take sonic. I could take diet cook out of
a can. I could take really, yeah, a can, not
a bottle. Yeah, the bottles can over ice. And then
I would do Mexican food. I'd have queso, I'd have nachos,
I'd have rice and beans and all the things. And
then for dessert, I don't really know. I would have
(17:08):
probably a mixture of kick cats and reeses mashed together
and baked into a cookie or like crumble cookies. That's
what I have. So anyway, it's just it's like, you
don't have to think too hard on this. It's just like,
and it can change over time. I would like to
reserve the right to change that if I ever do
have to have a last meal. Okay. Noted which Stashia
(17:30):
was learning about Alexander the Great my daughter, and it
makes me that we were talking about death. It made
me think of he had three dying wishes, and one
of them was that all the best doctors carry his coffin,
and that was representative of that even the best doctors,
if you've so you're surrounded by them, you can still die.
(17:52):
And then he wanted his money scattered in the street,
like his coins, like scattered on the way to his
grave site, to show that all the that you acquire,
the riches or the money that you have, you leave
and it stays on earth. So he's not taking it
with him versus people that would like bury themselves with
(18:13):
all of their in like a tomb, with all of
their right the Egyptians. Yeah, I mean, I guess he
wouldn't like that. And then I think the third one
was maybe they chopped off his hand. Third wish and
like hung it somewhere empty handed for people to see
that it's empty again with that same thinking of you
(18:33):
arrive into the world empty handed and you leave the
world empty handed, so it just hangs there. So and
I when Cishia and I were talking about it, she
was like, man, I wish I was there to scoop
up all those coins, like that was her takeaway, And
I thought, oh gosh, like no, this is a valuable
(18:56):
and there's a valuable lesson. And in his last three
dying wishes. Yeah, I think I learned that I didn't either.
I'm learning so much from my daughter being in high school.
Do you think that if you went back to school.
I think about this with history. I wish I could
go back to school and tell myself to pay attention,
because when you're in high school, you're like, I have
to take this history test about whatever war, and now
(19:19):
I'm like always on Google being like what happened in
the Civil War. It's like I should have paid attention. Yeah,
I feel like I felt that way when I went
to d C for the first time, as I do.
Some people got to take field trips as kids or
their their parents took them because they're one of an
educational vacation. I never went until my late twenties, and
(19:40):
I was so fascinated with everything in d C. And
I felt like I was learning so much and I
was soaking it up, and I thought, Ah, if I
could have just come here when I was in junior
higher high school, I would have, if it would have
been more interested and soaked up more and learned more. Maybe,
I mean, maybe I wouldn't have, But for me, I
had had that exact same thought, and I know I
(20:01):
want to go back and learn. I wish I would
have paid more attention in English and writing and all
the different things, like I have no idea when to
use a comma or not or yeah, I just you know,
it's called commas for dummies. I like to just go.
(20:22):
I think it's called like an it's something with an E. Right,
I have no idea. I didn't know it was a thing.
I thought I wish to stressed me not knowing what
to do, so I just did and then continue on,
continue on. So that's what I do. Okay. Yeah, So
I hope y'all are having the day that you need
(20:44):
to have, whatever that looks like for you. Cat, Where
can people find you on Instagram at Cat dot de
fata and at you Need Therapy. You can also listen
do you Need Therapy wherever you listen podcasts and I'm
at Radio am Me. You can also up radio amy
dot com for details about the pop up shop and
(21:06):
hopefully what's up there is if if you're coming to
town for the Four Things Live on March, which the
pop up shop will be on which is like a
happy hour pop up shop for Haiti that we're doing
selling all kinds of four things, a Spua pimp and
joy merch. All proceeds going to the orphanage or I
adopted my kids from and then there will be drinks
and hanging out and whatnot at restore. But the details
(21:28):
would be well here at Radio Amy. You can go
to my bio and I did a link tree, so
I got the link tree working in from the link tree,
you can get to the website and maybe I'll just
add in the link tree the direct link direct link
to the blog that has the pop up shop info
and then also awhere to eat info. So speaking of food,
(21:50):
because some people are traveling in. There's someone coming from
Alaska and California, Texas, there's a few a few others.
I don't know. If you're coming from somewhere else, let
me know. I would love to know where you're coming from.
But I'm putting together a list of hotels, food, things
to do. Because the show, you're either coming to the
three pm or the seven pm. So you've got all
(22:10):
day Saturday. You may have all day Sunday, you may
have all day Friday. But Friday, from four to seven
you're gonna be the pop up job. I want to
send you my personal to I already wrote the blog,
but do you want me to add I'm sure they're
in there, Okay, Like what could you have included that
I wouldn't have. You don't think that I know cool things,
but I mean, I'm sure I included because too. And
(22:33):
I'm also yeah, yeah, yeah, I got it. I wouldn't
say I'm that cool, but I did. I did research, Okay,
I trust you. I did my research of like where
I like to go in my own head, and then
I did internet research of like what are some of
the top places in Nashville, what gets the best reviews?
What's the fun things to do in Franklin? If you
wanted to go out to Arrington Vineyards already headed south
(22:55):
if you want to, which is something that I've done
multiple times, but I don't always think of that off
the head, Like if some is coming to Nashville, I
don't say, oh, you should check out Harrington, but you should.
It's owned by Kicks and Brooks or is it both
of them? I because I don't, Yeah, one of them,
one of them. And it's beautiful. You could take a picnic.
You don't even have to drink wine. You cannot bring
(23:17):
your own alcohol, though learned that the hard way you
have to buy. You brought your own wine to a
wine ory, we brought a different cocktail thing like not
wine but that either. Okay, that's it makes more sense. Yeah,
we thought, well, we'll buy wine and have that as
an option, but also have other cocktail situation for people
that don't like wine. But it's been your so nope,
(23:37):
they want you to drink their wine or you can
just drink water. Yeah, all right, have the day you
need to have
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