June 3, 2025 • 45 mins
The ‘feeling of the day’ is Supported and it all started with a note from a listener who shared this one simple question for another listener: “What’s the best that could happen?” This leads to Kat sharing a VERY powerful story about a client interaction she once had that’ll stick with you. Plus, Amy shares a list of things you can tell yourself to create ‘calm’ before bed (speaking of bed: she also goes over the money subliminals she listens to as she’s falling asleep + why she’s sleeping elevated) and then Kat goes over air baths (shoutout to Benjamin Franklin!!)
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Email: heythere@feelingthingspodcast.com
HOSTS:
Amy Brown // RadioAmy.com // @RadioAmy
Kat Van Buren // @KatVanburen
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
All right, break it down.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
If you ever have feelings that you just fonts Amy
and Cat gotcha Cob and locking them brother ladies and felts.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
We just follow the spirit where it's tell us O
real stuff to the chill stuff and the m but Swayne,
sometimes the best thing you can do it.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Just stop you feel things.
Speaker 4 (00:27):
This is feeling things with Amy and Kat.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Happy Tuesday. Welcome to feeling things. I'm Amy, I'm Cat,
and we have a little something special for everybody today.
We've never done this before, never, never, first time. No,
we have a hybrid situation fusion. Ah.
Speaker 4 (00:41):
Yeah, we don't really know what.
Speaker 1 (00:43):
We're calling it, but it's when it's like if Feeling
of the day and Email of.
Speaker 4 (00:47):
The Day had a baby.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
That's what we're doing.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
And we don't know how to combine the songs, so
we're just going to sing them both. So get ready
for our feeling of a day mixed with our Email
of the day. Okay, the reason why our feeling of
the day and our Email the day had a little
baby is because we got this email from Autumn and
(01:11):
she is responding to a couch talk. So that with
sin in we already aired it from McKenzie. She's pregnant
and she's just feeling a little like um, not as
excited as she thought she would feel, and she was
feeling a little weird about that. And this has happened
before too. It's not just with Autumn and McKenzie, but
(01:32):
other people have emailed in to give advice or feedback
or thoughts to other couch Talks things which couch Talks
airs on Thursday.
Speaker 4 (01:40):
This is feeling things we do. This is our big show.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
Welcome to the Big Show on Tuesdays. And I love
the emails that we get that are supporting our other listeners,
and that for Kat and myself just helps it feel
more like a community, which is what we're trying to build.
We want y'all to all feel connected, even though you're
listening in different places all over the world.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
All over the world.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
I was gonna say country, but then I feel like
we do have one listener in Nigeria. Really, I think
I saw that probably one in the UK, or we
had yeah, we have Canada, we have UK, we have
more obvious countries. But when I saw a listener in Nigeria,
I was like, interesting.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
Wait, could that just be like a listener from Oklahoma
that traveled to Nigeria.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
Yes likely Yes, maybe they were just there on a
trip and they downloaded it, or this they moved there
on their missionary or they're deployed somewhere in Africa worldwide.
This a three or five? All right? So, uh, the
(02:50):
feeling of the day is supported and it's because of
this email we got from autumn.
Speaker 4 (02:55):
So do you see how we just had.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
A baby we merged? Here's the email that Auto sent in. Hey,
Amy and kat I listened to the couch talks about
McKenzie navigating feelings around a new pregnancy. I related to
many of those feelings in her circumstances. I'm also a
military family and a mom with a busy career. Something
that helped me get through my fears early in pregnancy
(03:18):
was the following quote, what's the best that could happen?
My brain often jumps straight to the worst case scenarios
and all the things.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
That could go wrong.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
That quote, which I guess is also a question, is
a nice reminder that things can also go right. Love y'all,
So what's the best that could happen? I love it,
and I love that she sent that in for Mackenzie.
And I love that we get to share it here
on the big show and that we're all feeling supported.
(03:49):
Hopefully Mackenzie hears that and she feels supported. I feel supported.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
I feel supported.
Speaker 4 (03:54):
Yeah, we all feel supported.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
And this reminds me and made me think about how
even in training as a therapist, we're taught to ask
what's the worst that can happen? When somebody's struggling with something,
we help them, Well, what's the worst that can happen? Like,
let's go through that, versus framing their mind more towards
the things that could go right. And that's something I've
had to work on as a therapist. Maybe in like
(04:20):
twenty seventeen, I had a client who she was younger,
maybe like sixteen seventeen, and she would come in every
single week and she had a hard life. She had
a really rough home situation, struggling in school with some things,
struggling with some body image stuff. And every week when
(04:41):
she would come in, I would ask her like, how
are these things going that she was struggling with? And
it would always be really negative, and she would always
be really solemn and very depressed, And I noticed myself
getting frustrated as a therapist, which for me was a
red flag of I'm supposed I have this positive regard
for my clients and I shouldn't have this dread when
(05:04):
I see a client on my schedule because she's not
getting better or not getting sick of hearing what she's saying.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
But I'm just like, oh, frustrated.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
So I was like, Okay, what are you doing over
and over and again that's not working and kind of
how can you shift them? So one day she came
in before I asked her like, how are things going?
And we did our thing where I was like, how
are things with your dad? And she was like, I
hate them. I said, I'm not going to ask you
about any of those things. I have a different question.
(05:35):
She said, okay. I said, is anything going well for you?
Is there anything about your life that you like? And
she kind of just like looked at me funny, and
I was like, shit, okay and she was actually yes,
and I said okay.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
And she did a lot of art.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
She was an artist, and a lot of things that
we talked about she would ask to draw them or
paint and so she said can I show you instead
of tell you?
Speaker 3 (06:02):
And I said okay.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
So She got out my butcher paper and all like
that art supplies, and she had me turn my back
so I couldn't see it until she was done, so
I couldn't be peeking. So I turned my back for
like twenty minutes, and then she said, okay, I'm done,
and I turned around and I still have this. I
kept it this like mural. It was on like big
butcher paper. It was this mural of this girl and
(06:25):
then all of these things around her that she liked
about herself, and I just kind of dropped.
Speaker 3 (06:31):
My job kind of just dropped. I was like, what
is this?
Speaker 2 (06:34):
And then she started telling me about all these things.
If I like this, and I like this, and this
is going really well, and this is part of even
there are even parts of her body which she was
struggling with body image, and she had an eating disorder,
and there are parts of her own body that I
had no idea that she really liked. And so she
told me all about it. And then I looked at
her and I said, why have you never told me
(06:56):
about any of.
Speaker 3 (06:57):
This stuff in your life? And she.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Kind of paused. I wish I knew more about what
she was thinking, but she just paused. And she said, well,
because you've never asked me oh, And I.
Speaker 3 (07:11):
Was like wow, yeah, I said, okay, you are right,
I have never asked you about what you like about it.
That was eye opening for me as a therapist.
Speaker 4 (07:23):
I'll probably changed you.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Yes, I never asked her once what she liked about
her life. I only focused on the things that weren't
going well, and a lot of those things were out
of her control, like she can't control her mom, she
can't control her dad, she can't control people at school,
versus what do you like? And what would happen if
we started focusing on those things? And it made me think, yeah,
(07:45):
the questions we ask are going to impact how we
view things.
Speaker 3 (07:50):
And where we go.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
So rather than always asking, well, what's the worst that
can happen, what's the best that could happen in this situation?
Speaker 1 (07:59):
And I also just a remind her too of how
we're interacting with people of like the questions we're asking them,
because like, yeah, whatever y'all were focusing on in therapy,
that was the version of her. You were gettings and
you were starting to be like, oh, yeah, I'm kind
of dreading this. So even in our relationships because Not
all of us are therapists, right, most of us aren't.
(08:20):
But in our friendships or our partnerships or our work relationships,
like what are we doing to kind of lead conversation
and things we may be frustrated with when it comes
to other people, it's like, oh, wait, how have we
contributed to that? Yeah, by the questions we're asking.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
Yeah, we get stuck in the same routine, the same stuff,
and I still have to I love that that story
is embedded in my brain forever because that still happens
where I get stuck in kind of a cycle with
a client or a friend or somebody, Like, wait a second,
I keep doing the same thing. So part of this
is on me. If I keep asking somebody the same
question about the same thing that they don't have control over,
(08:56):
I'm probably going to keep getting the same answer. So
if we shift star vision a little bit, this might
still be going on. But other things are happening too,
And it's not to like because I think sometimes bad, Yes,
bad things are happening, and it's fair to be able
to process that and feel that. But it's being able
to hold both of those things. I didn't change her
relationship with her dad but we did spend more time
(09:17):
focusing on the relationships in her life that were really good,
and that shifted the way she felt walking around.
Speaker 3 (09:23):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 1 (09:24):
Yeah, it reminds me of a conversation I just had
with my boyfriend. It's a little different, but it reminds
me of it. So he was traveling and going to
the airport and I was on the phone with him,
and right when he got to where he parks and
like takes the shuttle, he was like, oh.
Speaker 4 (09:39):
The shuttle isn't here.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
And then once the shuttle got there and he got
to there, but he's like, oh my gosh, remind me
to never travel on this day at this time again
because it is just crazy. And then he's like, oh
my god. Like it was like four things.
Speaker 4 (09:55):
In a row.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
And he's not a negative person, but I happened to
be in a very like positive mood, and so I
just I didn't want to be impacted by his negativeness.
Which I can do that too. I mean I can
rattle off four things that I'm annoyed about in a row.
So it wasn't about me being better. It's just like,
in that moment, I realized, like, whoa you're being that way,
(10:19):
and I don't. I don't want to soak up any
of that type of energy, so let's reset. I was like, so,
tell me, is there anything that's going right this morning,
like before you're traveling?
Speaker 4 (10:30):
And he was like, oh, well, I didn't feel like
that stuff was really bad.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
I said, I know it doesn't seem that way, but
I'm over here with this different energy and you're just
like ping ping ping ping, which I know you're getting
ready to leave the country and this is a lot
and it can be overwhelming, but let's can we focus on, like,
just tell me something that's going right for you right now?
Speaker 3 (10:46):
And then that.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
Helped sort of reset us. And I would want him
to do the same thing for me, like if I
was the one noticing negative things around me, Like could
he pause and say, okay, can you tell me something
that's going right?
Speaker 3 (11:00):
Is anything and there's a finesse to it?
Speaker 5 (11:02):
Right?
Speaker 4 (11:03):
It's a finesse.
Speaker 3 (11:04):
A finesse.
Speaker 4 (11:04):
Oh I like that word.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
I don't know that I mean, because remember how I
don't know that I've ever used finesse other than like,
isn't that a hairspray finesse?
Speaker 5 (11:14):
Is it?
Speaker 3 (11:14):
Trust? Trust?
Speaker 1 (11:16):
Finesse is that different? Maybe it's part of a tagline.
Finesse means no, finesse like yeah, like a smoothness to it.
There's a dance to it. There's a way to do it.
It's got to be a tagline for a hair product.
I don't know, okay, but there's a finesse.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
I like it.
Speaker 4 (11:34):
I'm going to start using it.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
It start word of the day.
Speaker 3 (11:38):
Shannon will find us the definition.
Speaker 4 (11:40):
Also, I want to know what commercial it's been in.
Speaker 2 (11:42):
But this, but this is reminding me how I think
it was it your kids or who who was it
Adeline that told you that?
Speaker 3 (11:49):
You asked the question, what does this make possible? Too fast? Oh?
Speaker 4 (11:52):
Adeline ads to share both of them together.
Speaker 3 (11:55):
Yeah. So this is where the finesse comes in.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
Where we have space for the frustration, and we have
space for the things that are going wrong, and we
are mindful to not let somebody linger there too long.
We're helping them see the other side, versus saying don't
look at that. Okay, I'm gonna help you see both
versus don't look at that.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
Guess what finesse Finish and strengthen Extra Hold Hairspray nine
nine on.
Speaker 3 (12:18):
Amazon something brand finesse finish.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
I don't know, Yeah it is finesse.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
Also, is that how you spell finess because it looks
like finis.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
Yeah, but I have to say finesse in like soccer,
We're like, oh, they had a finesse to it, like
when you did like a really cool move, like and
it was like smooth, Like oh.
Speaker 1 (12:40):
Oh, this is gonna be my new word. You know
how dates are my new food.
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Like those dates had a finesse to them in my salade.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
Yeah, I'm just gonna start using it all the time,
like dates, I want dates and everything.
Speaker 3 (12:49):
I love dates.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
And now I feel like I'm going to fall in
love with the word finess.
Speaker 3 (12:53):
I have a challenge for you, Okay, on the Bobby
Bones Show.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
You should have to work in finesse once, no problem,
in the next twice in the next week.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
How about that. Yeah, see if somebody picks up of
like you've said that twice.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
So my boyfriend's son gave me that challenge on the
Bobby Bone Show once because he listens on his way
to school and he's twelve, and he was like, and
you do just say the word donut. And I was like, Okay, well,
we'll see, because Bobby was doing the news and so
I'm like, how am I going to work donut into
the news? And I feel like maybe. Then Bobby brought
up some story about UFOs or some identify unidentified objects
(13:28):
aliens like something with the government, and I'm like, how
in the world am I gonna work in donut? And
I just remember saying something like, well, do we have
the the whole picture, like the whole, like the whole shebang,
the whole donut, because you know, you know, there's the
full donut and then you have the cutout donut and
(13:48):
that's how you get the donut hole.
Speaker 3 (13:50):
We just have the donut hole? Or do we have
the whole donut?
Speaker 1 (13:52):
Yeah, the whole shebang? I think, I go, do we
have the whole donut? Is this the whole donut?
Speaker 4 (13:55):
The whole shebang?
Speaker 1 (13:56):
And that was the way that I worked at it,
and he thought it was the coolest thing ever.
Speaker 6 (14:00):
Like he's on his way to school and he's like,
she just doesn't do that, like this is crazy, which
speaking of my boyfriend, you know how that reminds me
because Autumn was talking about the Couch Talk's email from
(14:24):
Mackenzie and It was on that episode that I called
my boyfriend my husband.
Speaker 3 (14:29):
How could we forget?
Speaker 4 (14:31):
Yeah, and that was cool.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
It's just a little fruity Fridian slip for Fredian Freudian.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
It's not like you're saying fruity.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
Freudianian Freudian Fredian slip.
Speaker 6 (14:42):
Yep.
Speaker 4 (14:43):
And it has been haunting me ever since.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
So it made a funny you know, real about it
that we put on social at Feeling Things podcast. If
you're not already following, follow TikTok Instagram, I'll subscribe, like subscribe, follow, reshare, save, comment, save, save,
save our posts. Apparently saving posts helps engagement because that.
Speaker 3 (15:06):
Know, that means people really like this.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
I want to come back to it, saving and sharing,
like if you share it to your stories.
Speaker 4 (15:12):
Share it to her friend, share it too. Yeah, that's
what I started doing.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
You know they did that. I went in, I posted
something and I started sending it out to everybody we know,
and I was like, my sister. But it worked because
my sister went to Our Feeling Things and she commented,
and I don't know that she comments that often, but
because I put it straight into her DMS, she was like, ah, yeah,
I'm gonna go leave a comment I sent it to.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
But you didn't say anything to people when you did it,
because I I just smired it off.
Speaker 3 (15:36):
Okay, I did that this morning.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
I sent it to one of my friends and I
texted her, you can ignore that DM I sent you,
and she goes, oh, dang it.
Speaker 3 (15:42):
I thought I was special when you were setting I
should have just let her.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
Let it be, okay, just start firing it off to
all your people. I sent it to your husband, send
it to my boyfriend, like ha, look at this reel
when I called you my husband, because then the.
Speaker 4 (15:56):
The caption on it was, uh, what was you soft launch?
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Husband?
Speaker 4 (16:00):
Yeah, just saft launched my marriage.
Speaker 3 (16:02):
He doesn't know it yet, So what did he think
of it?
Speaker 4 (16:05):
He thought it was hilarious.
Speaker 1 (16:06):
Okay, he thought it was funny, Thank goodness. But when
I say it is haunting me, it's like his dad
sent me a text and he was like, your quote
unquote husband, just sent me the video because you know,
also in the video we talked about wait to Worry WTW,
which was an acronym or saying from his dad, and
so he thought sharing his dad would be special, and
(16:27):
of course his dad loved it. But his dad was like, oh,
Alex sent me this. He was like, your husband sent it.
And then you saw some guy at the gym that
also said something and then which you can tell that story.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
So I've been going to the gym with this guy
for probably nine months and we've said high and stuff
to each other, but never introduced each other.
Speaker 3 (16:48):
So thank you. You helped me make a friend.
Speaker 2 (16:50):
He came up to me, he was like, oh my gosh,
you came up on my Instagram and I wanted to
tell you. He was like, I don't know Amy, but
I know her husband because he's a great guy.
Speaker 1 (17:01):
And I was like, yeah, yeah, So it turns out, yes,
they do know each other and the kids know each other.
And then my boyfriend got a text from one of
his neighbors that said, are you getting married?
Speaker 3 (17:12):
Stop it?
Speaker 1 (17:13):
Yes, and I was like, make it stop, stop stop.
So he really thought, who knows what the neighbors saw
or what that because sometimes you're just scrolling real quick
and it could say be like my face soft launch
of my marriage, Like he doesn't know yet, and maybe
they don't. I don't know, do they get it? Did
they not understand what really happened? And then they're texting
him are you getting married? Are you getting engaged? And
(17:34):
I said, well, what did you reply? He goes, I
just sent back no, And I was like, well, what do.
Speaker 3 (17:38):
You mean by no? We're not engaged?
Speaker 1 (17:42):
Right? I know it was a very normal answer, but
somehow I was offended by it.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
You wanted him to be like, not yet, right, Yeah, yeah,
that makes sense. Do you remember you might not remember
this when early when Patrick and I were dating, he
posted it was like maybe the first picture he posted
of me, I think it was, and I had a
ring on my ring finger and he posted it and
he got multiple people, including his cousin, called him and asked,
(18:07):
are you engaged? I was like, first of all, if
that was our engagement post, we would have some issues.
I think we're a house of cards or something.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
Yes you do. I'm like, oh my gosh, that never
will wear I never wore a ring on that finger. Point.
Speaker 4 (18:21):
Did he just reply no?
Speaker 2 (18:22):
I think he just like he no, he said, he
said no, but we're looking into it.
Speaker 3 (18:29):
I'm just kidding. I was dating for like three months.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
Maybe Okay, well I look it's fine. He just answered
no straight.
Speaker 4 (18:37):
To the point.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
Gosh, no, finesse about him at all. The definition of
finesse to do something in a subtle and delicate manner,
intricate and refined delicacy finesse.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
So if somebody does something really smooth, be like, oh
I like that finesse.
Speaker 4 (18:53):
Yeah, straight, like it's you know, like straight fire, that's straight.
You know, we made sick a thing.
Speaker 3 (19:00):
What if we make finesse?
Speaker 2 (19:02):
So I wonder if we start saying finess and you
start saying around your boyfriend's kids, I must just said
your husband's kids. You say it around your boyfriend's kids,
if they'll be like, oh that sounds kind of cool.
They bring it to school, we get the whole town
saying it, okay.
Speaker 1 (19:16):
Oh actually yeah, the whole town, the whole world.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
Have you ever said it had a saying that you
started saying and then you heard other people started saying it,
And you're.
Speaker 3 (19:24):
Like, wait, I think I started that?
Speaker 4 (19:27):
No, no, have you?
Speaker 1 (19:28):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (19:29):
But I don't think I did, Like I think I
probably heard it.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
I don't want to put money on that you didn't
Oh sorry, I had no finesse with that, But what
was the saying?
Speaker 3 (19:40):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
There's been multiple things, and I'm like, wait, I said that.
Now everybody's saying it.
Speaker 4 (19:44):
Well, you got me saying sick.
Speaker 3 (19:46):
Yeah, but I know I didn't start that. I'll think
of it because I know.
Speaker 1 (19:50):
If you remember what it was, then.
Speaker 3 (19:52):
I'm nervous right now. I feel like I'm put on
the spot.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
Okay, circle, because I definitely want to know.
Speaker 2 (19:59):
Okay, but okay, Also I want people to hear me
saying I don't think I really did start it.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
Just but you haven't even said what it is, so
you don't have to clarify. It's not like you're taking
credit for anything. You can said what it is. You're like,
for the record. I just don't want to, you know,
act like I'm taking credit for this, saying that I
haven't even said yet because I don't remember what it is.
Speaker 3 (20:21):
I get you heart be misunderstood.
Speaker 4 (20:24):
Yeah, yeah, don't worry.
Speaker 1 (20:27):
Was it?
Speaker 4 (20:29):
What are some sayings like I.
Speaker 3 (20:31):
Don't even know things that I say.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
It's a problem, like no, cap okay, I didn't start that,
nor do I say it. Dope, don't say that fire fireflame?
I say fireflame?
Speaker 4 (20:44):
What is that?
Speaker 6 (20:45):
Like?
Speaker 3 (20:45):
If something's sick? Sometimes I'll say that's fireflame.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
Who says that?
Speaker 2 (20:50):
Well, two of my friends started saying it too, and
then we made it our group chat name.
Speaker 3 (20:53):
But because is that the emojia you know when people
send a fireflame?
Speaker 4 (20:57):
Yeah, well I just call it fire button.
Speaker 2 (20:58):
Well, so then I say no fireflame because that's the emoji,
is the fireflame.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
So there's fire.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
What if we say, like, please start saying fire flames
like a match? Cool because that's like strike a match fire. Yeah,
that's straight strike a match because it's about to be
straight fire.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
That's a lighter lit. A litle lit lit was one.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
I know, but I didn't start that.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
Yeah, okay, I don't have anything. I'm like trying to
think of more cool saying that I've gotten nothing. Okay,
I have like you know, back in the day, we
would say like psych like when I was in junior high.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
That cycles through because that started we started saying that
when I was in high school.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
And I, eh, anyways, eh, I cauld do that. Yes
you do that? People who know no somebody. Girls who
get it get it, and girls who don't don't.
Speaker 4 (21:55):
I don't get that club anyway.
Speaker 3 (21:58):
That is mean girl.
Speaker 4 (21:59):
Ash probably was.
Speaker 3 (22:00):
It was like and you did it as you like
curled your hair.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
You go anyways, that feels mean I like it.
Speaker 4 (22:07):
I don't know that. I don't.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
I think I had it done to me a lot.
It was when I went to It was in sixth grade.
I went to Fullmore.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Did you say that when like somebody you were tired
of what they were saying and you're like, anyways.
Speaker 1 (22:19):
No, I just said I didn't really say it, Okay, Max,
it was just popular at my school. Okay, we had
no finex anyways. Okay, I have a little some something,
and then I know you have a little some something
like I'm going to share things we can say to
ourselves to feel calm.
Speaker 4 (22:37):
Before we go to sleep.
Speaker 1 (22:39):
Okay, And I'm very very very very very very excited
about you telling your thing because we have had air
bats on our schedule on our Google doc for weeks now.
If we haven't gotten to it for whatever reason, I
don't know why, we just haven't gotten to it. And
I want to know all that airbats because I love baths.
(23:00):
I love a forest bath, you know. I love cold
plunge baths. I like warm plunge baths, like hot baths,
cold bats.
Speaker 2 (23:10):
So stay tuned, don't stop listening now, because we're going
to say that a sound bats.
Speaker 4 (23:14):
I love a sound bath.
Speaker 3 (23:16):
What have you heard of air baths? I haven't.
Speaker 1 (23:19):
That's why I'm eager for you to tell me about it.
So I'm gonna knock mine out real quick because we
can get tears. So these are things that we should
be saying to ourselves before we sleep. I saw this
list thought it could be helpful if you're having trouble
falling asleep. Okay, so you lay down, picture it.
Speaker 3 (23:36):
First step is still lay down, first.
Speaker 1 (23:38):
Up, lay down? Although, can I share something about how
I've been sleeping sitting up?
Speaker 3 (23:42):
Elevated? How elevated?
Speaker 1 (23:44):
Okay, Well, I have a thing that I got through
work from mattress firm at like like a hospital bed.
Speaker 4 (23:50):
So is it very thankful to sides?
Speaker 3 (23:52):
So your partner could be a different.
Speaker 4 (23:53):
No, it's the whole. We're all together.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
I think way back when've been in a whole, we
had the whole. We had the two different sides. He
maybe got that in the divorces. So anyways, I just
had the regular. However, like if you don't have that,
or you go to a hotel, but you can stack
your pillows and kind of just sleep a little bit elevated,
(24:16):
and I feel like my face. I've been waking up
less puffy when I'm sleeping elevated, okay, and something, it's
like better about circulation. And even if you can raise
your feet up a little bit, like it's like good
for the the blood from your feet to go towards
your abs and the blood from your head to go
down towards your ebs. You know. So you're almost like
at this. It's like zero gravity whatever they call zero
(24:38):
google it.
Speaker 3 (24:38):
I thought zero gravity was like when you're in space.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
No, but it's what they call It's like an elevated
state of like your hips are at one hundred and
twenty degree angle or something.
Speaker 3 (24:47):
This is getting too complicated.
Speaker 4 (24:49):
Well sorry, I'm easy too. This is I've gone on
a drink.
Speaker 2 (24:55):
You have to be one hundred and twenty degrees elevated
in zero gravity, which you go to space to sleep.
Speaker 1 (24:59):
Now okay, Well I was originally telling you that, and
then my ADHD brain took us on a journey to
zero gravity sleeping, which is a thing.
Speaker 4 (25:07):
Okay, So don't hate I'm.
Speaker 3 (25:09):
Not hating you. I just feel I feel.
Speaker 1 (25:13):
Like you've been taken down a rabbit hole.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
I feel overwhelmed. Now I want to feel underwhelmed with
my sleep. I want to feel whelmed.
Speaker 4 (25:23):
Okay, well that was just a side note.
Speaker 1 (25:25):
Okay, like whatever, sleep elevated, don't sleep elevated, no pressure.
Speaker 3 (25:30):
Sleep under your bed.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
Yeah, okay, back to the original feeling of calm. This
is what you're gonna say to yourself.
Speaker 3 (25:36):
Okay? Is this one long mantra or different things?
Speaker 1 (25:39):
Pick which ones you need, okay, or write them all down.
Speaker 3 (25:42):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
I released the day with gratitude. I don't need all
the answers tonight. I am proud of how far I've come.
I did my best today and that's enough. I forgive
myself and others asterisk, because like you may be heaven
forgiven the others. I am safe.
Speaker 3 (26:06):
You can choose your own adventure.
Speaker 4 (26:07):
There, I added the asterisk.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
You were like, I forget myself, but not them. Yeah
yet yet.
Speaker 1 (26:15):
I am safe to let go. I will wake up
with greater clarity. I can start again tomorrow. I am
ready to drift into peace now. I don't want to
throw you. I know I just went over that list.
I'm in a detour real quick because I just thought
of something else that I used to do that I
stopped doing, and I don't know.
Speaker 3 (26:33):
Why I stopped about sleeping.
Speaker 4 (26:35):
I used to listen to like.
Speaker 1 (26:37):
Sleep talk down audio on YouTube from Jason Stevenson. Do
you remember telling you about him? He has an accent.
I don't know where he's from. Maybe Australia.
Speaker 3 (26:46):
Is just the guy that says the money one.
Speaker 1 (26:49):
Oh no, that's something that's vibrations, that's subliminal that I
ast to. I can't really hear the person saying it,
but I'm listening to like bees buzzing, and then underneath
they're going, you are good with money. Circulating money brings
you towards You're responsible for large sum of money, and
(27:11):
you know what to do with it.
Speaker 4 (27:13):
You handle money with ease. Yeah, I handle money with
e That's that's a different.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Those are my subliminals that help me with my finances
because money used to always stress me out.
Speaker 4 (27:22):
So that's what I do to stay calm with.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
You are a money magnet.
Speaker 3 (27:29):
That's the one that I need.
Speaker 1 (27:30):
Yeah, give me five hundred dollars right now. Well, no
you're not.
Speaker 4 (27:35):
I mean, you're not talking to anybody else.
Speaker 3 (27:37):
I know, but the name it would help me ask
for it better.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
But it's like imagine you're just but I don't hear that.
I mean it's under there because towards the end you
can kind of hear it because the maybe the ocean's
crashing or the bees buzzing or the birds chirping, they
sort of die out and then you hear the But
they're talking Relie really fast. It looks like a recorded
it's on fast feed, and it's like you are a
money magnet. You're really good when you attract money, and
money comes too easily, and people just want to give
you money. It's like that, but you're hearing it under
(28:03):
Who gave you this idea? I came across it on Instagram.
Cry Okat came across some posts that she saw, and
then my cousin has talked to me about subliminals before.
And then I went to this one link that the
person posted about and then I clicked on the link
and I was like, okay, I'll get that app. So
I get the app and then I just listened to it.
Speaker 3 (28:23):
Wait a second, did you have to pay for a subscription?
Speaker 1 (28:25):
I pay for it, not a lot, though you're good
with money.
Speaker 2 (28:32):
You will pay twenty nine ninety nine a month to
have this subliminal message.
Speaker 1 (28:36):
That there's a that's the money one. I can listen
to nobody.
Speaker 4 (28:41):
It is hilarious.
Speaker 3 (28:45):
You're like, oh so funny.
Speaker 1 (28:48):
I know, I know, I'm a sucker who knows if
these even work. Maybe we should make our own, like
I do it. Yes, I do it morning and do it,
and I try to do it when I'm going to sleep,
when I'm waking up, because your your brain is in
like I don't know, the state delta maybe or something,
which is good at receiving subliminals because you have different
wavelengths where you're more susceptible to absorb. Okay, okay, so
(29:09):
because on a subconscious level, like I had convinced myself
that I was horrible with money, and now on a
subconscious level, I'm I'm subliminally telling myself or whoever this
lady is that recorded these things really fast, she totally
you're really good at mone You're making mad.
Speaker 3 (29:24):
What if in it? You don't know what they're like?
You will give me all of.
Speaker 4 (29:28):
Your mind, but I'm not.
Speaker 1 (29:28):
I haven't given her anything else, like I'm not giving
any other money. Like I also listened to the your
creative genius, there's a creative genius, aren't really creative though,
thank you. I almost didn't accept that compliment. But I
am working on that. So she'd be like, you know,
you you have ideas they are flowing out of you
(29:50):
or an idea.
Speaker 4 (29:51):
I'm an idea magnet.
Speaker 1 (29:53):
Okay, so subliminals back to that. Jason Stevenson is different.
He does sleep talk down videos works much as for
his free and he's got like millions of lessons, sort
of like us. We're millions of views on YouTube.
Speaker 4 (30:09):
We're the same.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
So Jason Stevenson and he just talks down. It's like
a sleep it's like a talking that's talking you down
to go to sleep. So I think they're called sleep
talk down.
Speaker 3 (30:20):
Okay, then you stopped doing it because you didn't need it.
Speaker 1 (30:22):
Don't know. I guess I was getting better, but I
was really into it for a while, probably because I
replaced it with my subliminals. You know.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
Yeah, but this is nice. You can just say these
instead of have your sleep talk down. Yeah, you could
just say this to yourself. I release the day with gratitude.
Speaker 1 (30:39):
I don't need all the answers right now.
Speaker 3 (30:41):
That's my favorite one.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
I know that one's good for me because you know,
one thing I was wearing on therapy for sure late
last year. Was trying to figure everything out, and my
therapist kept saying, what if there's nothing to figure out?
Speaker 4 (30:54):
And I'm like, are you kidding me?
Speaker 3 (30:56):
Who do you think you are?
Speaker 1 (30:57):
There's so much to figure out. I have to figure
out what How are you doing with that?
Speaker 3 (31:02):
Now?
Speaker 5 (31:03):
Better?
Speaker 3 (31:03):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (31:04):
I got better with that after my ketamine sort of
release some of that, I mean obviously, and then talking
through it with her afterwards, and then you know, that
helps the way to worry also helps that in my relationship,
like there's nothing to figure out. Wtw Yeah, I don't
need all the answers tonight tomorrow.
Speaker 5 (31:25):
That's a different story.
Speaker 1 (31:37):
Okay, real quick before we get into air bathing, Shannon
found us some things about sleeping elevated. Sleeping with an
elevated head, such as using an extra pillow or a wedge,
can be beneficial for your face, particularly and reducing puffiness
and improving skin health. Elevating your head helps reduce fluid
build up, which can lead to morning puffiness, especially around
(31:57):
the eyes. Boom, sick, take it, and subliminals. You're generally
more susceptible to subliminal messages when your brain isn't actively
engaged in demanding tasks, allowing it to filter and process
subliminal stimuli more easily.
Speaker 2 (32:12):
Wait, so you shouldn't be doing things when you listen
to your subliminals. You should like be lying down. Yeah,
well you don't, do you do that?
Speaker 3 (32:19):
Kat?
Speaker 1 (32:19):
What I just told you when I listened to my subliminals?
When do I listen to my subliminals?
Speaker 2 (32:25):
I thought you did it while you were like doing
dishes or something. No, were you lying down?
Speaker 1 (32:30):
I just said I listened to it before I go
to bed and when I wake up, because my brain.
Speaker 2 (32:35):
Is still in Like, I'm sorry, Delta, It's not that
I wasn't listening, It's just that I wasn't paying attention.
Speaker 1 (32:40):
I have compassion for your kind of brain because I
too have the brain that you have, which I could
easily do that same exact thing to you, which is
I think one of the beautiful things about our friendship
is because we have similar brains. So I'm not even offended.
Speaker 2 (32:59):
It's also you've given me a lot of grace. I've
forgotten what day your birthday is for the past five years. Yeah,
it's in my calendar. It's just in my calendar. It's
the wrong day. And you think, after the first year
that I said happy birthday and the wrong day, I
would have changed it. But guess what still been there
on the wrong day.
Speaker 4 (33:15):
Yours is December fourth. It's fine.
Speaker 3 (33:16):
Yours is the nineteenth eighteen. My calendar on the seventeenth,
so I knew it wasn't the seventeenth. It's okay.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
My best friend from high school. From high school, so
I've been friends with her since we were thirteen, and I
still get the days flipped, and it's crazy.
Speaker 3 (33:30):
Why can you remember mine? Then I don't know. It's
jay Zy's birthday.
Speaker 1 (33:33):
Too, probably, and Cryocats is December tenth. I don't know, Yeah,
thirteenth of December.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
Yeah, oh, I don't like her. Shannon's birthday is right
after my birthday. No, after your birthday, it's after yours, right,
it's four.
Speaker 3 (33:53):
I knew that.
Speaker 1 (33:54):
Yeah, hers seventeenth.
Speaker 3 (33:56):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (33:56):
So yeah, now we've got everybody in the room. Birthdays
are covered, listeners are informed, they know. But I will
say this because I have had friends where I have
missed their birthday and I don't even think I understood
how my brain worked around birthdays. And I would carry
a lot of shame and guilt, and I felt terrible,
but I was like, how did I just go this
whole day? Now I have had to try to implement
(34:19):
things like calendar. Shannon helps me, like all the things
like and I still will mess up and get things wrong,
but as an adult, I try now now that I'm
an aware adult, I've been an adult for a while,
but with my ADHD, part of my awareness is like
making sure that we've got our tools in place. That said,
(34:41):
I still will mess up. But before I had a calendar,
which was not that long ago, I do not like calendars.
I hated calendar sometimes. Let's say this was probably twenty eighteen,
I forgot a friend's birthday and I felt terrible and
I also did not understand my brain, nor did she,
and it just did not go well. And it's something
that came up even later, remember later in the day, Yeah,
(35:05):
in the evening, and and then I immediately sent a gift.
Speaker 2 (35:07):
And you had already talked to her that day, Bil, Yeah, yeah,
it's some form of communication.
Speaker 1 (35:11):
And it just was I when I was in bed
and I sat up and realized it, like I was like, oh,
oh my god, I'm a horrible human.
Speaker 4 (35:20):
I don't think we can use our.
Speaker 3 (35:23):
Our ADHD people.
Speaker 1 (35:24):
We can't just use it as an excuse. But also
I think that, like, if you have a friend that
has ADHD and that were to happen, like, don't take
it personally, because yeah, it's not.
Speaker 3 (35:36):
An excuse, but it's not a reason.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
To question your friendship, right, And that's not a reflection
on how much I care about you exactly. Interest is
part of my brain and I need to work on
that better. I did that to my mom in college.
I I'll never forget this. I called her because I
really needed a pair of new shoes because I had
formal that night on her I called her and I said, no,
I can't find any shoes to wear with my dress.
(36:00):
So I don't have any money, and almost probably I'm sure.
She said, like, you can go get some I'll put
some money on your account. She was so nice. And
then maybe four hours later, I was like, oh, it's
my mom's birthday, April twenty third. I knew when her
birthday was, I just didn't know it's April twenty third,
And so I caught her and I said, Mom, I'm
so sorry, happy birthday, and she said, it's okay, you
(36:21):
were just worried about your shoes.
Speaker 4 (36:23):
I was like, oh, yeah.
Speaker 3 (36:25):
Yeah, I was. I also forgot my dad's birthday I
think last year.
Speaker 4 (36:29):
But it's but I guess it's not a self absorbed thing.
Speaker 2 (36:32):
Well, it's like I'll tell her happy birthday later, and
then you cause you like, see it too early in
the morning, and then you forget and you put it later,
and then it's too late, and then like.
Speaker 4 (36:40):
Well, now you can schedule texts.
Speaker 3 (36:42):
What did I know this? Did you already tell me this?
Speaker 4 (36:44):
I don't think so.
Speaker 1 (36:45):
I knew you could schedule emails, you can schedule text now.
Speaker 2 (36:48):
Okay, I'm got to just schedule text for all the
birthdays the next year.
Speaker 4 (36:51):
Sick, sick, fire, the neess or something like that. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (36:59):
So, well, you know, we did went down a few
rabbit holes there air baths.
Speaker 3 (37:05):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (37:05):
So I was reading an article about I think I
was talking about embracing your uniqueness or your quirks. I
didn't get through much of the article because I was
stopped in my tracks when they brought up Benjamin Franklin
and his quirks. Do you know much about him?
Speaker 4 (37:20):
I mean, he found electricity and bifocals.
Speaker 3 (37:23):
Pretty sure.
Speaker 2 (37:25):
Apparently he was a really quirky, interesting guy, and which
makes sense because if he did all these like inventions,
he had to be a little He was a progressive thinker.
Speaker 3 (37:35):
I guess like us.
Speaker 1 (37:37):
Just like us, we invent words, saying sphrases, they go viral.
Speaker 2 (37:42):
And he did something called air bathing, and I was like,
what is air bathing? So I looked they just like
mentioned his air bass as if like everybody knew that
Benjamin Franklin took air baths and what they were, so
obviously you think of them and you're like, he's probably
basking in the air. Well, know what he would do,
is he for like an hour and a half or
(38:02):
so in the morning. The first thing he would do,
or one of the first things he would do, is
go into a room, open the windows, get completely nude
and bathe the air. And he thought it was literally cleansing.
He said it was more cleansing than actual baths.
Speaker 1 (38:14):
Okay, Benjamin, his air bathing is not.
Speaker 2 (38:17):
He said, cleaner than a bath, he said, I mean
maybe back then he would advocate for air baths, a
practice where he would sit naked in a room with
open windows, to expose his.
Speaker 3 (38:25):
Body to fresh air.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
He believed this practice, which he referred to as bracing
or a tonic bath, was beneficial for his health and
helped him maintain good health. He liked to practice with
cool morning air to energize himself and love the warm
afternoon sun to relax.
Speaker 1 (38:39):
Okay, so I get that. I mean, so he's a
little bit of ahead of his time. Yeah, oh yeah,
because we do stuff like well, because it's kind of
like a cold plunge, right, there are probably benefits to it.
But the thing that got me is he said it
says Franklin preferred air baths to actual water baths, believing
they were a more effective and agreeable way to cleanse
the body. That's where I like, Yeah, soap like maybe
(39:02):
cleansing mentally because you can get still and clear and calm.
Speaker 2 (39:07):
But like, but what was the like hygiene back then?
You know, I don't think they had the best hygiene, right,
So maybe they just weren't up on the times of
soap and water was probably more of a harded resource.
Speaker 1 (39:21):
To get I think about that when I like, when
I was watching Gilded Age, you know, did you watch that?
Speaker 3 (39:26):
No, you've talked about it before. So good. You watched
when is the Gilded.
Speaker 4 (39:29):
Age late eighteen hundreds?
Speaker 3 (39:31):
When was Benjamin Franklin alive?
Speaker 4 (39:34):
Shannon, That's one of those things.
Speaker 1 (39:37):
I know that Thomas Edison was in the Gilded Age,
Like he invented the light bulb around then, So I
don't know if the light bulb and electricity.
Speaker 4 (39:45):
Came at the same ish.
Speaker 2 (39:46):
Because Benjamin was the kite with the lightning, yes, right,
and the bifocal and bifocals.
Speaker 3 (39:53):
So we'll figure out seventeen hundreds.
Speaker 1 (39:56):
Oh wow, so he's Wow. He lived till eighty four,
so maybe he's onto something. Oh my god, that's old
for back then.
Speaker 3 (40:04):
Maybe he was lucky sort no, I mean.
Speaker 1 (40:07):
Maybe he's his air baths, like he probably did his
life better care.
Speaker 2 (40:12):
He probably was doing things that were really good for
your men going outside's understand. Oh, while I was gonna say,
he probably was doing things that were really good for
his mental health that impact his overall health. And he
didn't even know it, like if he went outside and
I mean now it's like, duh, the sun helps our health.
Speaker 3 (40:29):
But he was and that's hard for us to do now.
He was getting feuish here. Yeah, he naked he was
getting air baths. The wind was just cleansing his whole buddy.
Speaker 1 (40:41):
Well in the so the Gilded Age was about one
hundred years after he died. And they had these beautiful dresses,
you know, and they're like corsets and they're all what's
under the dress the like really the the white stuff
that like makes a tool, Oh, thank you, the tool, just.
Speaker 3 (41:01):
Say it like you would say a hammer tool tool. Yeah, okay, So.
Speaker 4 (41:06):
That stuff under their dress that's white and fluffy.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
All that I'm trying to say is when it comes
to hygiene, and they would it would be so hot
out and they have on these dresses. Like what did
they do to smell? Like did they have do you wonder?
I mean, I use all natural deodas, so maybe that's
what they were doing. Did they do coconut oil and
you know vanilla?
Speaker 3 (41:26):
What's that?
Speaker 4 (41:27):
Some essential oil with a little baking wait.
Speaker 3 (41:30):
A second, or soda? I never thought about that, well
we were, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (41:35):
I don't.
Speaker 1 (41:35):
I did. When I watch the show, I'm like, well,
they've got to be so hot, and I wonder if
they smell, and then they'll start like making out and
then do it and I'm like, oh, what am I doing.
Speaker 2 (41:43):
Also, if it was normal, then they probably would be like, oh,
it's the smell, that's what people smell like.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
Oh, they would use okay, Shannon to the rescue. In
the seventeenth centuries, people use variety of fragrant materials to
smell good, floral sense like roses, orange blossoms, jasmine, as
well as musky sense. Potpourrie was also popular for homes
and who they had gumback then perfumed gloves. Interesting do
(42:09):
you put gloves on and then to stick your gloves
under your arms?
Speaker 2 (42:11):
But also I see here Shannon's helping us out in
multiple different ways.
Speaker 3 (42:16):
Bats where we're for the rich.
Speaker 2 (42:19):
Bathing was for the availabity of water depending on your
social standing. So I don't know what Benjamin's social standing was.
I would assume it would have been high. He could
have been bathing. Maybe he was saving the baths for
the other people.
Speaker 1 (42:32):
Yeah, Oh my gosh, they used to bathe me. We're
bathing too much. That's what my boyfriend says, I shower
too much.
Speaker 3 (42:41):
I don't.
Speaker 2 (42:41):
I think he said it's bad for my skin, well,
my microbiome.
Speaker 3 (42:49):
I like to feel clean.
Speaker 1 (42:50):
Yeah, same, I'll incorporate an air bath into my routine.
Speaker 2 (42:55):
But also like depending on where can you we could
just open all the windows in my home and get naked.
Speaker 3 (43:01):
People can see through my windows.
Speaker 4 (43:03):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (43:03):
I picture Benjamin. He's probably on like a little like
house on a hill. No one's bothering him, Like, yeah,
neighbors right next door.
Speaker 3 (43:11):
That's Benjamin. He's air bathing, don't mind him.
Speaker 1 (43:14):
Yeah, well, air bats we did it. The more you
got it, now we cross that off. Every y'all try
it out. Let us know, but don't get busted for
like decent. What'ssure?
Speaker 3 (43:27):
You could just sit in a bathing suit.
Speaker 1 (43:30):
No, it has to be air baby to get it
all through the orifices. Some of this is making me
think of a story about cryocat which we need to
get her a mic so that she could speak on it,
so she doesn't have it. I'm just gonna throw this
out there for listeners in case any of them have
had this experience.
Speaker 4 (43:46):
And they know, like maybe what could be going on.
Speaker 1 (43:48):
But she's waking up smelling weird, like this never happened
o before. Like she could take a shower and go
to bed and in the morning she'll wake up and
she smells like Indian food, not even bo Indian food.
Speaker 3 (44:01):
Is there Indian food in her bath?
Speaker 1 (44:03):
That's what I said, Or like maybe in her water
shower like her neighbors.
Speaker 4 (44:06):
Are they cooking?
Speaker 1 (44:07):
No?
Speaker 3 (44:07):
Does that have to do with some of the supplements
you're taking?
Speaker 1 (44:09):
She thinks maybe, But I don't know if anybody else
has had this experience, just let us know. She thinks
it could potentially be too much testosterone or stress, like
any just has anybody else had an issue where they
wake up suddenly out of nowhere, smelling like Indian food
and they haven't eaten in any food, same diet all
the time she stacked her meals. But okay, maybe it
(44:34):
could be certain pepsil. Maybe it's on We don't know.
Speaker 2 (44:37):
I wish she was still having this problem because then
we could have her air bathe and see if it helped.
Speaker 4 (44:41):
Yeah, because she would do.
Speaker 1 (44:43):
That too much, soap, No problem there, all right?
Speaker 3 (44:46):
Kat?
Speaker 1 (44:46):
Where can people find us?
Speaker 2 (44:47):
On Instagram at you need it not you need therapy?
I keep doing that, that's okay? On Instagram at Feeling
Things podcast.
Speaker 1 (44:55):
Yes, and on YouTube TikTok all the things, and we
hope that you will email us. Hey, there at Feelingthings
podcast dot com and you can call and leave us
a voicemail eight seven seven two oh seven two oh
seven seven. All this stuff is in the show notes
as well. And lastly, have the day you need to have.
Speaker 3 (45:17):
Bye Bye,
All right, break it down.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
If you ever have feelings that you just fonts Amy
and Cat gotcha Cob and locking them brother ladies and felts.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
We just follow the spirit where it's tell us O
real stuff to the chill stuff and the m but Swayne,
sometimes the best thing you can do it.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Just stop you feel things.
Speaker 4 (00:27):
This is feeling things with Amy and Kat.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Happy Tuesday. Welcome to feeling things. I'm Amy, I'm Cat,
and we have a little something special for everybody today.
We've never done this before, never, never, first time. No,
we have a hybrid situation fusion. Ah.
Speaker 4 (00:41):
Yeah, we don't really know what.
Speaker 1 (00:43):
We're calling it, but it's when it's like if Feeling
of the day and Email of.
Speaker 4 (00:47):
The Day had a baby.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
That's what we're doing.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
And we don't know how to combine the songs, so
we're just going to sing them both. So get ready
for our feeling of a day mixed with our Email
of the day. Okay, the reason why our feeling of
the day and our Email the day had a little
baby is because we got this email from Autumn and
(01:11):
she is responding to a couch talk. So that with
sin in we already aired it from McKenzie. She's pregnant
and she's just feeling a little like um, not as
excited as she thought she would feel, and she was
feeling a little weird about that. And this has happened
before too. It's not just with Autumn and McKenzie, but
(01:32):
other people have emailed in to give advice or feedback
or thoughts to other couch Talks things which couch Talks
airs on Thursday.
Speaker 4 (01:40):
This is feeling things we do. This is our big show.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
Welcome to the Big Show on Tuesdays. And I love
the emails that we get that are supporting our other listeners,
and that for Kat and myself just helps it feel
more like a community, which is what we're trying to build.
We want y'all to all feel connected, even though you're
listening in different places all over the world.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
All over the world.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
I was gonna say country, but then I feel like
we do have one listener in Nigeria. Really, I think
I saw that probably one in the UK, or we
had yeah, we have Canada, we have UK, we have
more obvious countries. But when I saw a listener in Nigeria,
I was like, interesting.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
Wait, could that just be like a listener from Oklahoma
that traveled to Nigeria.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
Yes likely Yes, maybe they were just there on a
trip and they downloaded it, or this they moved there
on their missionary or they're deployed somewhere in Africa worldwide.
This a three or five? All right? So, uh, the
(02:50):
feeling of the day is supported and it's because of
this email we got from autumn.
Speaker 4 (02:55):
So do you see how we just had.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
A baby we merged? Here's the email that Auto sent in. Hey,
Amy and kat I listened to the couch talks about
McKenzie navigating feelings around a new pregnancy. I related to
many of those feelings in her circumstances. I'm also a
military family and a mom with a busy career. Something
that helped me get through my fears early in pregnancy
(03:18):
was the following quote, what's the best that could happen?
My brain often jumps straight to the worst case scenarios
and all the things.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
That could go wrong.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
That quote, which I guess is also a question, is
a nice reminder that things can also go right. Love y'all,
So what's the best that could happen? I love it,
and I love that she sent that in for Mackenzie.
And I love that we get to share it here
on the big show and that we're all feeling supported.
(03:49):
Hopefully Mackenzie hears that and she feels supported. I feel supported.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
I feel supported.
Speaker 4 (03:54):
Yeah, we all feel supported.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
And this reminds me and made me think about how
even in training as a therapist, we're taught to ask
what's the worst that can happen? When somebody's struggling with something,
we help them, Well, what's the worst that can happen? Like,
let's go through that, versus framing their mind more towards
the things that could go right. And that's something I've
had to work on as a therapist. Maybe in like
(04:20):
twenty seventeen, I had a client who she was younger,
maybe like sixteen seventeen, and she would come in every
single week and she had a hard life. She had
a really rough home situation, struggling in school with some things,
struggling with some body image stuff. And every week when
(04:41):
she would come in, I would ask her like, how
are these things going that she was struggling with? And
it would always be really negative, and she would always
be really solemn and very depressed, And I noticed myself
getting frustrated as a therapist, which for me was a
red flag of I'm supposed I have this positive regard
for my clients and I shouldn't have this dread when
(05:04):
I see a client on my schedule because she's not
getting better or not getting sick of hearing what she's saying.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
But I'm just like, oh, frustrated.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
So I was like, Okay, what are you doing over
and over and again that's not working and kind of
how can you shift them? So one day she came
in before I asked her like, how are things going?
And we did our thing where I was like, how
are things with your dad? And she was like, I
hate them. I said, I'm not going to ask you
about any of those things. I have a different question.
(05:35):
She said, okay. I said, is anything going well for you?
Is there anything about your life that you like? And
she kind of just like looked at me funny, and
I was like, shit, okay and she was actually yes,
and I said okay.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
And she did a lot of art.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
She was an artist, and a lot of things that
we talked about she would ask to draw them or
paint and so she said can I show you instead
of tell you?
Speaker 3 (06:02):
And I said okay.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
So She got out my butcher paper and all like
that art supplies, and she had me turn my back
so I couldn't see it until she was done, so
I couldn't be peeking. So I turned my back for
like twenty minutes, and then she said, okay, I'm done,
and I turned around and I still have this. I
kept it this like mural. It was on like big
butcher paper. It was this mural of this girl and
(06:25):
then all of these things around her that she liked
about herself, and I just kind of dropped.
Speaker 3 (06:31):
My job kind of just dropped. I was like, what
is this?
Speaker 2 (06:34):
And then she started telling me about all these things.
If I like this, and I like this, and this
is going really well, and this is part of even
there are even parts of her body which she was
struggling with body image, and she had an eating disorder,
and there are parts of her own body that I
had no idea that she really liked. And so she
told me all about it. And then I looked at
her and I said, why have you never told me
(06:56):
about any of.
Speaker 3 (06:57):
This stuff in your life? And she.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Kind of paused. I wish I knew more about what
she was thinking, but she just paused. And she said, well,
because you've never asked me oh, And I.
Speaker 3 (07:11):
Was like wow, yeah, I said, okay, you are right,
I have never asked you about what you like about it.
That was eye opening for me as a therapist.
Speaker 4 (07:23):
I'll probably changed you.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Yes, I never asked her once what she liked about
her life. I only focused on the things that weren't
going well, and a lot of those things were out
of her control, like she can't control her mom, she
can't control her dad, she can't control people at school,
versus what do you like? And what would happen if
we started focusing on those things? And it made me think, yeah,
(07:45):
the questions we ask are going to impact how we
view things.
Speaker 3 (07:50):
And where we go.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
So rather than always asking, well, what's the worst that
can happen, what's the best that could happen in this situation?
Speaker 1 (07:59):
And I also just a remind her too of how
we're interacting with people of like the questions we're asking them,
because like, yeah, whatever y'all were focusing on in therapy,
that was the version of her. You were gettings and
you were starting to be like, oh, yeah, I'm kind
of dreading this. So even in our relationships because Not
all of us are therapists, right, most of us aren't.
(08:20):
But in our friendships or our partnerships or our work relationships,
like what are we doing to kind of lead conversation
and things we may be frustrated with when it comes
to other people, it's like, oh, wait, how have we
contributed to that? Yeah, by the questions we're asking.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
Yeah, we get stuck in the same routine, the same stuff,
and I still have to I love that that story
is embedded in my brain forever because that still happens
where I get stuck in kind of a cycle with
a client or a friend or somebody, Like, wait a second,
I keep doing the same thing. So part of this
is on me. If I keep asking somebody the same
question about the same thing that they don't have control over,
(08:56):
I'm probably going to keep getting the same answer. So
if we shift star vision a little bit, this might
still be going on. But other things are happening too,
And it's not to like because I think sometimes bad, Yes,
bad things are happening, and it's fair to be able
to process that and feel that. But it's being able
to hold both of those things. I didn't change her
relationship with her dad but we did spend more time
(09:17):
focusing on the relationships in her life that were really good,
and that shifted the way she felt walking around.
Speaker 3 (09:23):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 1 (09:24):
Yeah, it reminds me of a conversation I just had
with my boyfriend. It's a little different, but it reminds
me of it. So he was traveling and going to
the airport and I was on the phone with him,
and right when he got to where he parks and
like takes the shuttle, he was like, oh.
Speaker 4 (09:39):
The shuttle isn't here.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
And then once the shuttle got there and he got
to there, but he's like, oh my gosh, remind me
to never travel on this day at this time again
because it is just crazy. And then he's like, oh
my god. Like it was like four things.
Speaker 4 (09:55):
In a row.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
And he's not a negative person, but I happened to
be in a very like positive mood, and so I
just I didn't want to be impacted by his negativeness.
Which I can do that too. I mean I can
rattle off four things that I'm annoyed about in a row.
So it wasn't about me being better. It's just like,
in that moment, I realized, like, whoa you're being that way,
(10:19):
and I don't. I don't want to soak up any
of that type of energy, so let's reset. I was like, so,
tell me, is there anything that's going right this morning,
like before you're traveling?
Speaker 4 (10:30):
And he was like, oh, well, I didn't feel like
that stuff was really bad.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
I said, I know it doesn't seem that way, but
I'm over here with this different energy and you're just
like ping ping ping ping, which I know you're getting
ready to leave the country and this is a lot
and it can be overwhelming, but let's can we focus on, like,
just tell me something that's going right for you right now?
Speaker 3 (10:46):
And then that.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
Helped sort of reset us. And I would want him
to do the same thing for me, like if I
was the one noticing negative things around me, Like could
he pause and say, okay, can you tell me something
that's going right?
Speaker 3 (11:00):
Is anything and there's a finesse to it?
Speaker 5 (11:02):
Right?
Speaker 4 (11:03):
It's a finesse.
Speaker 3 (11:04):
A finesse.
Speaker 4 (11:04):
Oh I like that word.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
I don't know that I mean, because remember how I
don't know that I've ever used finesse other than like,
isn't that a hairspray finesse?
Speaker 5 (11:14):
Is it?
Speaker 3 (11:14):
Trust? Trust?
Speaker 1 (11:16):
Finesse is that different? Maybe it's part of a tagline.
Finesse means no, finesse like yeah, like a smoothness to it.
There's a dance to it. There's a way to do it.
It's got to be a tagline for a hair product.
I don't know, okay, but there's a finesse.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
I like it.
Speaker 4 (11:34):
I'm going to start using it.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
It start word of the day.
Speaker 3 (11:38):
Shannon will find us the definition.
Speaker 4 (11:40):
Also, I want to know what commercial it's been in.
Speaker 2 (11:42):
But this, but this is reminding me how I think
it was it your kids or who who was it
Adeline that told you that?
Speaker 3 (11:49):
You asked the question, what does this make possible? Too fast? Oh?
Speaker 4 (11:52):
Adeline ads to share both of them together.
Speaker 3 (11:55):
Yeah. So this is where the finesse comes in.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
Where we have space for the frustration, and we have
space for the things that are going wrong, and we
are mindful to not let somebody linger there too long.
We're helping them see the other side, versus saying don't
look at that. Okay, I'm gonna help you see both
versus don't look at that.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
Guess what finesse Finish and strengthen Extra Hold Hairspray nine
nine on.
Speaker 3 (12:18):
Amazon something brand finesse finish.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
I don't know, Yeah it is finesse.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
Also, is that how you spell finess because it looks
like finis.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
Yeah, but I have to say finesse in like soccer,
We're like, oh, they had a finesse to it, like
when you did like a really cool move, like and
it was like smooth, Like oh.
Speaker 1 (12:40):
Oh, this is gonna be my new word. You know
how dates are my new food.
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Like those dates had a finesse to them in my salade.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
Yeah, I'm just gonna start using it all the time,
like dates, I want dates and everything.
Speaker 3 (12:49):
I love dates.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
And now I feel like I'm going to fall in
love with the word finess.
Speaker 3 (12:53):
I have a challenge for you, Okay, on the Bobby
Bones Show.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
You should have to work in finesse once, no problem,
in the next twice in the next week.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
How about that. Yeah, see if somebody picks up of
like you've said that twice.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
So my boyfriend's son gave me that challenge on the
Bobby Bone Show once because he listens on his way
to school and he's twelve, and he was like, and
you do just say the word donut. And I was like, Okay, well,
we'll see, because Bobby was doing the news and so
I'm like, how am I going to work donut into
the news? And I feel like maybe. Then Bobby brought
up some story about UFOs or some identify unidentified objects
(13:28):
aliens like something with the government, and I'm like, how
in the world am I gonna work in donut? And
I just remember saying something like, well, do we have
the the whole picture, like the whole, like the whole shebang,
the whole donut, because you know, you know, there's the
full donut and then you have the cutout donut and
(13:48):
that's how you get the donut hole.
Speaker 3 (13:50):
We just have the donut hole? Or do we have
the whole donut?
Speaker 1 (13:52):
Yeah, the whole shebang? I think, I go, do we
have the whole donut? Is this the whole donut?
Speaker 4 (13:55):
The whole shebang?
Speaker 1 (13:56):
And that was the way that I worked at it,
and he thought it was the coolest thing ever.
Speaker 6 (14:00):
Like he's on his way to school and he's like,
she just doesn't do that, like this is crazy, which
speaking of my boyfriend, you know how that reminds me
because Autumn was talking about the Couch Talk's email from
(14:24):
Mackenzie and It was on that episode that I called
my boyfriend my husband.
Speaker 3 (14:29):
How could we forget?
Speaker 4 (14:31):
Yeah, and that was cool.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
It's just a little fruity Fridian slip for Fredian Freudian.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
It's not like you're saying fruity.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
Freudianian Freudian Fredian slip.
Speaker 6 (14:42):
Yep.
Speaker 4 (14:43):
And it has been haunting me ever since.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
So it made a funny you know, real about it
that we put on social at Feeling Things podcast. If
you're not already following, follow TikTok Instagram, I'll subscribe, like subscribe, follow, reshare, save, comment, save, save,
save our posts. Apparently saving posts helps engagement because that.
Speaker 3 (15:06):
Know, that means people really like this.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
I want to come back to it, saving and sharing,
like if you share it to your stories.
Speaker 4 (15:12):
Share it to her friend, share it too. Yeah, that's
what I started doing.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
You know they did that. I went in, I posted
something and I started sending it out to everybody we know,
and I was like, my sister. But it worked because
my sister went to Our Feeling Things and she commented,
and I don't know that she comments that often, but
because I put it straight into her DMS, she was like, ah, yeah,
I'm gonna go leave a comment I sent it to.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
But you didn't say anything to people when you did it,
because I I just smired it off.
Speaker 3 (15:36):
Okay, I did that this morning.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
I sent it to one of my friends and I
texted her, you can ignore that DM I sent you,
and she goes, oh, dang it.
Speaker 3 (15:42):
I thought I was special when you were setting I
should have just let her.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
Let it be, okay, just start firing it off to
all your people. I sent it to your husband, send
it to my boyfriend, like ha, look at this reel
when I called you my husband, because then the.
Speaker 4 (15:56):
The caption on it was, uh, what was you soft launch?
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Husband?
Speaker 4 (16:00):
Yeah, just saft launched my marriage.
Speaker 3 (16:02):
He doesn't know it yet, So what did he think
of it?
Speaker 4 (16:05):
He thought it was hilarious.
Speaker 1 (16:06):
Okay, he thought it was funny, Thank goodness. But when
I say it is haunting me, it's like his dad
sent me a text and he was like, your quote
unquote husband, just sent me the video because you know,
also in the video we talked about wait to Worry WTW,
which was an acronym or saying from his dad, and
so he thought sharing his dad would be special, and
(16:27):
of course his dad loved it. But his dad was like, oh,
Alex sent me this. He was like, your husband sent it.
And then you saw some guy at the gym that
also said something and then which you can tell that story.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
So I've been going to the gym with this guy
for probably nine months and we've said high and stuff
to each other, but never introduced each other.
Speaker 3 (16:48):
So thank you. You helped me make a friend.
Speaker 2 (16:50):
He came up to me, he was like, oh my gosh,
you came up on my Instagram and I wanted to
tell you. He was like, I don't know Amy, but
I know her husband because he's a great guy.
Speaker 1 (17:01):
And I was like, yeah, yeah, So it turns out, yes,
they do know each other and the kids know each other.
And then my boyfriend got a text from one of
his neighbors that said, are you getting married?
Speaker 3 (17:12):
Stop it?
Speaker 1 (17:13):
Yes, and I was like, make it stop, stop stop.
So he really thought, who knows what the neighbors saw
or what that because sometimes you're just scrolling real quick
and it could say be like my face soft launch
of my marriage, Like he doesn't know yet, and maybe
they don't. I don't know, do they get it? Did
they not understand what really happened? And then they're texting
him are you getting married? Are you getting engaged? And
(17:34):
I said, well, what did you reply? He goes, I
just sent back no, And I was like, well, what do.
Speaker 3 (17:38):
You mean by no? We're not engaged?
Speaker 1 (17:42):
Right? I know it was a very normal answer, but
somehow I was offended by it.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
You wanted him to be like, not yet, right, Yeah, yeah,
that makes sense. Do you remember you might not remember
this when early when Patrick and I were dating, he
posted it was like maybe the first picture he posted
of me, I think it was, and I had a
ring on my ring finger and he posted it and
he got multiple people, including his cousin, called him and asked,
(18:07):
are you engaged? I was like, first of all, if
that was our engagement post, we would have some issues.
I think we're a house of cards or something.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
Yes you do. I'm like, oh my gosh, that never
will wear I never wore a ring on that finger. Point.
Speaker 4 (18:21):
Did he just reply no?
Speaker 2 (18:22):
I think he just like he no, he said, he
said no, but we're looking into it.
Speaker 3 (18:29):
I'm just kidding. I was dating for like three months.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
Maybe Okay, well I look it's fine. He just answered
no straight.
Speaker 4 (18:37):
To the point.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
Gosh, no, finesse about him at all. The definition of
finesse to do something in a subtle and delicate manner,
intricate and refined delicacy finesse.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
So if somebody does something really smooth, be like, oh
I like that finesse.
Speaker 4 (18:53):
Yeah, straight, like it's you know, like straight fire, that's straight.
You know, we made sick a thing.
Speaker 3 (19:00):
What if we make finesse?
Speaker 2 (19:02):
So I wonder if we start saying finess and you
start saying around your boyfriend's kids, I must just said
your husband's kids. You say it around your boyfriend's kids,
if they'll be like, oh that sounds kind of cool.
They bring it to school, we get the whole town
saying it, okay.
Speaker 1 (19:16):
Oh actually yeah, the whole town, the whole world.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
Have you ever said it had a saying that you
started saying and then you heard other people started saying it,
And you're.
Speaker 3 (19:24):
Like, wait, I think I started that?
Speaker 4 (19:27):
No, no, have you?
Speaker 1 (19:28):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (19:29):
But I don't think I did, Like I think I
probably heard it.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
I don't want to put money on that you didn't
Oh sorry, I had no finesse with that, But what
was the saying?
Speaker 3 (19:40):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
There's been multiple things, and I'm like, wait, I said that.
Now everybody's saying it.
Speaker 4 (19:44):
Well, you got me saying sick.
Speaker 3 (19:46):
Yeah, but I know I didn't start that. I'll think
of it because I know.
Speaker 1 (19:50):
If you remember what it was, then.
Speaker 3 (19:52):
I'm nervous right now. I feel like I'm put on
the spot.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
Okay, circle, because I definitely want to know.
Speaker 2 (19:59):
Okay, but okay, Also I want people to hear me
saying I don't think I really did start it.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
Just but you haven't even said what it is, so
you don't have to clarify. It's not like you're taking
credit for anything. You can said what it is. You're like,
for the record. I just don't want to, you know,
act like I'm taking credit for this, saying that I
haven't even said yet because I don't remember what it is.
Speaker 3 (20:21):
I get you heart be misunderstood.
Speaker 4 (20:24):
Yeah, yeah, don't worry.
Speaker 1 (20:27):
Was it?
Speaker 4 (20:29):
What are some sayings like I.
Speaker 3 (20:31):
Don't even know things that I say.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
It's a problem, like no, cap okay, I didn't start that,
nor do I say it. Dope, don't say that fire fireflame?
I say fireflame?
Speaker 4 (20:44):
What is that?
Speaker 6 (20:45):
Like?
Speaker 3 (20:45):
If something's sick? Sometimes I'll say that's fireflame.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
Who says that?
Speaker 2 (20:50):
Well, two of my friends started saying it too, and
then we made it our group chat name.
Speaker 3 (20:53):
But because is that the emojia you know when people
send a fireflame?
Speaker 4 (20:57):
Yeah, well I just call it fire button.
Speaker 2 (20:58):
Well, so then I say no fireflame because that's the emoji,
is the fireflame.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
So there's fire.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
What if we say, like, please start saying fire flames
like a match? Cool because that's like strike a match fire. Yeah,
that's straight strike a match because it's about to be
straight fire.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
That's a lighter lit. A litle lit lit was one.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
I know, but I didn't start that.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
Yeah, okay, I don't have anything. I'm like trying to
think of more cool saying that I've gotten nothing. Okay,
I have like you know, back in the day, we
would say like psych like when I was in junior high.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
That cycles through because that started we started saying that
when I was in high school.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
And I, eh, anyways, eh, I cauld do that. Yes
you do that? People who know no somebody. Girls who
get it get it, and girls who don't don't.
Speaker 4 (21:55):
I don't get that club anyway.
Speaker 3 (21:58):
That is mean girl.
Speaker 4 (21:59):
Ash probably was.
Speaker 3 (22:00):
It was like and you did it as you like
curled your hair.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
You go anyways, that feels mean I like it.
Speaker 4 (22:07):
I don't know that. I don't.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
I think I had it done to me a lot.
It was when I went to It was in sixth grade.
I went to Fullmore.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Did you say that when like somebody you were tired
of what they were saying and you're like, anyways.
Speaker 1 (22:19):
No, I just said I didn't really say it, Okay, Max,
it was just popular at my school. Okay, we had
no finex anyways. Okay, I have a little some something,
and then I know you have a little some something
like I'm going to share things we can say to
ourselves to feel calm.
Speaker 4 (22:37):
Before we go to sleep.
Speaker 1 (22:39):
Okay, And I'm very very very very very very excited
about you telling your thing because we have had air
bats on our schedule on our Google doc for weeks now.
If we haven't gotten to it for whatever reason, I
don't know why, we just haven't gotten to it. And
I want to know all that airbats because I love baths.
(23:00):
I love a forest bath, you know. I love cold
plunge baths. I like warm plunge baths, like hot baths,
cold bats.
Speaker 2 (23:10):
So stay tuned, don't stop listening now, because we're going
to say that a sound bats.
Speaker 4 (23:14):
I love a sound bath.
Speaker 3 (23:16):
What have you heard of air baths? I haven't.
Speaker 1 (23:19):
That's why I'm eager for you to tell me about it.
So I'm gonna knock mine out real quick because we
can get tears. So these are things that we should
be saying to ourselves before we sleep. I saw this
list thought it could be helpful if you're having trouble
falling asleep. Okay, so you lay down, picture it.
Speaker 3 (23:36):
First step is still lay down, first.
Speaker 1 (23:38):
Up, lay down? Although, can I share something about how
I've been sleeping sitting up?
Speaker 3 (23:42):
Elevated? How elevated?
Speaker 1 (23:44):
Okay, Well, I have a thing that I got through
work from mattress firm at like like a hospital bed.
Speaker 4 (23:50):
So is it very thankful to sides?
Speaker 3 (23:52):
So your partner could be a different.
Speaker 4 (23:53):
No, it's the whole. We're all together.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
I think way back when've been in a whole, we
had the whole. We had the two different sides. He
maybe got that in the divorces. So anyways, I just
had the regular. However, like if you don't have that,
or you go to a hotel, but you can stack
your pillows and kind of just sleep a little bit elevated,
(24:16):
and I feel like my face. I've been waking up
less puffy when I'm sleeping elevated, okay, and something, it's
like better about circulation. And even if you can raise
your feet up a little bit, like it's like good
for the the blood from your feet to go towards
your abs and the blood from your head to go
down towards your ebs. You know. So you're almost like
at this. It's like zero gravity whatever they call zero
(24:38):
google it.
Speaker 3 (24:38):
I thought zero gravity was like when you're in space.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
No, but it's what they call It's like an elevated
state of like your hips are at one hundred and
twenty degree angle or something.
Speaker 3 (24:47):
This is getting too complicated.
Speaker 4 (24:49):
Well sorry, I'm easy too. This is I've gone on
a drink.
Speaker 2 (24:55):
You have to be one hundred and twenty degrees elevated
in zero gravity, which you go to space to sleep.
Speaker 1 (24:59):
Now okay, Well I was originally telling you that, and
then my ADHD brain took us on a journey to
zero gravity sleeping, which is a thing.
Speaker 4 (25:07):
Okay, So don't hate I'm.
Speaker 3 (25:09):
Not hating you. I just feel I feel.
Speaker 1 (25:13):
Like you've been taken down a rabbit hole.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
I feel overwhelmed. Now I want to feel underwhelmed with
my sleep. I want to feel whelmed.
Speaker 4 (25:23):
Okay, well that was just a side note.
Speaker 1 (25:25):
Okay, like whatever, sleep elevated, don't sleep elevated, no pressure.
Speaker 3 (25:30):
Sleep under your bed.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
Yeah, okay, back to the original feeling of calm. This
is what you're gonna say to yourself.
Speaker 3 (25:36):
Okay? Is this one long mantra or different things?
Speaker 1 (25:39):
Pick which ones you need, okay, or write them all down.
Speaker 3 (25:42):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
I released the day with gratitude. I don't need all
the answers tonight. I am proud of how far I've come.
I did my best today and that's enough. I forgive
myself and others asterisk, because like you may be heaven
forgiven the others. I am safe.
Speaker 3 (26:06):
You can choose your own adventure.
Speaker 4 (26:07):
There, I added the asterisk.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
You were like, I forget myself, but not them. Yeah
yet yet.
Speaker 1 (26:15):
I am safe to let go. I will wake up
with greater clarity. I can start again tomorrow. I am
ready to drift into peace now. I don't want to
throw you. I know I just went over that list.
I'm in a detour real quick because I just thought
of something else that I used to do that I
stopped doing, and I don't know.
Speaker 3 (26:33):
Why I stopped about sleeping.
Speaker 4 (26:35):
I used to listen to like.
Speaker 1 (26:37):
Sleep talk down audio on YouTube from Jason Stevenson. Do
you remember telling you about him? He has an accent.
I don't know where he's from. Maybe Australia.
Speaker 3 (26:46):
Is just the guy that says the money one.
Speaker 1 (26:49):
Oh no, that's something that's vibrations, that's subliminal that I
ast to. I can't really hear the person saying it,
but I'm listening to like bees buzzing, and then underneath
they're going, you are good with money. Circulating money brings
you towards You're responsible for large sum of money, and
(27:11):
you know what to do with it.
Speaker 4 (27:13):
You handle money with ease. Yeah, I handle money with
e That's that's a different.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Those are my subliminals that help me with my finances
because money used to always stress me out.
Speaker 4 (27:22):
So that's what I do to stay calm with.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
You are a money magnet.
Speaker 3 (27:29):
That's the one that I need.
Speaker 1 (27:30):
Yeah, give me five hundred dollars right now. Well, no
you're not.
Speaker 4 (27:35):
I mean, you're not talking to anybody else.
Speaker 3 (27:37):
I know, but the name it would help me ask
for it better.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
But it's like imagine you're just but I don't hear that.
I mean it's under there because towards the end you
can kind of hear it because the maybe the ocean's
crashing or the bees buzzing or the birds chirping, they
sort of die out and then you hear the But
they're talking Relie really fast. It looks like a recorded
it's on fast feed, and it's like you are a
money magnet. You're really good when you attract money, and
money comes too easily, and people just want to give
you money. It's like that, but you're hearing it under
(28:03):
Who gave you this idea? I came across it on Instagram.
Cry Okat came across some posts that she saw, and
then my cousin has talked to me about subliminals before.
And then I went to this one link that the
person posted about and then I clicked on the link
and I was like, okay, I'll get that app. So
I get the app and then I just listened to it.
Speaker 3 (28:23):
Wait a second, did you have to pay for a subscription?
Speaker 1 (28:25):
I pay for it, not a lot, though you're good
with money.
Speaker 2 (28:32):
You will pay twenty nine ninety nine a month to
have this subliminal message.
Speaker 1 (28:36):
That there's a that's the money one. I can listen
to nobody.
Speaker 4 (28:41):
It is hilarious.
Speaker 3 (28:45):
You're like, oh so funny.
Speaker 1 (28:48):
I know, I know, I'm a sucker who knows if
these even work. Maybe we should make our own, like
I do it. Yes, I do it morning and do it,
and I try to do it when I'm going to sleep,
when I'm waking up, because your your brain is in
like I don't know, the state delta maybe or something,
which is good at receiving subliminals because you have different
wavelengths where you're more susceptible to absorb. Okay, okay, so
(29:09):
because on a subconscious level, like I had convinced myself
that I was horrible with money, and now on a
subconscious level, I'm I'm subliminally telling myself or whoever this
lady is that recorded these things really fast, she totally
you're really good at mone You're making mad.
Speaker 3 (29:24):
What if in it? You don't know what they're like?
You will give me all of.
Speaker 4 (29:28):
Your mind, but I'm not.
Speaker 1 (29:28):
I haven't given her anything else, like I'm not giving
any other money. Like I also listened to the your
creative genius, there's a creative genius, aren't really creative though,
thank you. I almost didn't accept that compliment. But I
am working on that. So she'd be like, you know,
you you have ideas they are flowing out of you
(29:50):
or an idea.
Speaker 4 (29:51):
I'm an idea magnet.
Speaker 1 (29:53):
Okay, so subliminals back to that. Jason Stevenson is different.
He does sleep talk down videos works much as for
his free and he's got like millions of lessons, sort
of like us. We're millions of views on YouTube.
Speaker 4 (30:09):
We're the same.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
So Jason Stevenson and he just talks down. It's like
a sleep it's like a talking that's talking you down
to go to sleep. So I think they're called sleep
talk down.
Speaker 3 (30:20):
Okay, then you stopped doing it because you didn't need it.
Speaker 1 (30:22):
Don't know. I guess I was getting better, but I
was really into it for a while, probably because I
replaced it with my subliminals. You know.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
Yeah, but this is nice. You can just say these
instead of have your sleep talk down. Yeah, you could
just say this to yourself. I release the day with gratitude.
Speaker 1 (30:39):
I don't need all the answers right now.
Speaker 3 (30:41):
That's my favorite one.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
I know that one's good for me because you know,
one thing I was wearing on therapy for sure late
last year. Was trying to figure everything out, and my
therapist kept saying, what if there's nothing to figure out?
Speaker 4 (30:54):
And I'm like, are you kidding me?
Speaker 3 (30:56):
Who do you think you are?
Speaker 1 (30:57):
There's so much to figure out. I have to figure
out what How are you doing with that?
Speaker 3 (31:02):
Now?
Speaker 5 (31:03):
Better?
Speaker 3 (31:03):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (31:04):
I got better with that after my ketamine sort of
release some of that, I mean obviously, and then talking
through it with her afterwards, and then you know, that
helps the way to worry also helps that in my relationship,
like there's nothing to figure out. Wtw Yeah, I don't
need all the answers tonight tomorrow.
Speaker 5 (31:25):
That's a different story.
Speaker 1 (31:37):
Okay, real quick before we get into air bathing, Shannon
found us some things about sleeping elevated. Sleeping with an
elevated head, such as using an extra pillow or a wedge,
can be beneficial for your face, particularly and reducing puffiness
and improving skin health. Elevating your head helps reduce fluid
build up, which can lead to morning puffiness, especially around
(31:57):
the eyes. Boom, sick, take it, and subliminals. You're generally
more susceptible to subliminal messages when your brain isn't actively
engaged in demanding tasks, allowing it to filter and process
subliminal stimuli more easily.
Speaker 2 (32:12):
Wait, so you shouldn't be doing things when you listen
to your subliminals. You should like be lying down. Yeah,
well you don't, do you do that?
Speaker 3 (32:19):
Kat?
Speaker 1 (32:19):
What I just told you when I listened to my subliminals?
When do I listen to my subliminals?
Speaker 2 (32:25):
I thought you did it while you were like doing
dishes or something. No, were you lying down?
Speaker 1 (32:30):
I just said I listened to it before I go
to bed and when I wake up, because my brain.
Speaker 2 (32:35):
Is still in Like, I'm sorry, Delta, It's not that
I wasn't listening, It's just that I wasn't paying attention.
Speaker 1 (32:40):
I have compassion for your kind of brain because I
too have the brain that you have, which I could
easily do that same exact thing to you, which is
I think one of the beautiful things about our friendship
is because we have similar brains. So I'm not even offended.
Speaker 2 (32:59):
It's also you've given me a lot of grace. I've
forgotten what day your birthday is for the past five years. Yeah,
it's in my calendar. It's just in my calendar. It's
the wrong day. And you think, after the first year
that I said happy birthday and the wrong day, I
would have changed it. But guess what still been there
on the wrong day.
Speaker 4 (33:15):
Yours is December fourth. It's fine.
Speaker 3 (33:16):
Yours is the nineteenth eighteen. My calendar on the seventeenth,
so I knew it wasn't the seventeenth. It's okay.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
My best friend from high school. From high school, so
I've been friends with her since we were thirteen, and I
still get the days flipped, and it's crazy.
Speaker 3 (33:30):
Why can you remember mine? Then I don't know. It's
jay Zy's birthday.
Speaker 1 (33:33):
Too, probably, and Cryocats is December tenth. I don't know, Yeah,
thirteenth of December.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
Yeah, oh, I don't like her. Shannon's birthday is right
after my birthday. No, after your birthday, it's after yours, right,
it's four.
Speaker 3 (33:53):
I knew that.
Speaker 1 (33:54):
Yeah, hers seventeenth.
Speaker 3 (33:56):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (33:56):
So yeah, now we've got everybody in the room. Birthdays
are covered, listeners are informed, they know. But I will
say this because I have had friends where I have
missed their birthday and I don't even think I understood
how my brain worked around birthdays. And I would carry
a lot of shame and guilt, and I felt terrible,
but I was like, how did I just go this
whole day? Now I have had to try to implement
(34:19):
things like calendar. Shannon helps me, like all the things
like and I still will mess up and get things wrong,
but as an adult, I try now now that I'm
an aware adult, I've been an adult for a while,
but with my ADHD, part of my awareness is like
making sure that we've got our tools in place. That said,
(34:41):
I still will mess up. But before I had a calendar,
which was not that long ago, I do not like calendars.
I hated calendar sometimes. Let's say this was probably twenty eighteen,
I forgot a friend's birthday and I felt terrible and
I also did not understand my brain, nor did she,
and it just did not go well. And it's something
that came up even later, remember later in the day, Yeah,
(35:05):
in the evening, and and then I immediately sent a gift.
Speaker 2 (35:07):
And you had already talked to her that day, Bil, Yeah, yeah,
it's some form of communication.
Speaker 1 (35:11):
And it just was I when I was in bed
and I sat up and realized it, like I was like, oh,
oh my god, I'm a horrible human.
Speaker 4 (35:20):
I don't think we can use our.
Speaker 3 (35:23):
Our ADHD people.
Speaker 1 (35:24):
We can't just use it as an excuse. But also
I think that, like, if you have a friend that
has ADHD and that were to happen, like, don't take
it personally, because yeah, it's not.
Speaker 3 (35:36):
An excuse, but it's not a reason.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
To question your friendship, right, And that's not a reflection
on how much I care about you exactly. Interest is
part of my brain and I need to work on
that better. I did that to my mom in college.
I I'll never forget this. I called her because I
really needed a pair of new shoes because I had
formal that night on her I called her and I said, no,
I can't find any shoes to wear with my dress.
(36:00):
So I don't have any money, and almost probably I'm sure.
She said, like, you can go get some I'll put
some money on your account. She was so nice. And
then maybe four hours later, I was like, oh, it's
my mom's birthday, April twenty third. I knew when her
birthday was, I just didn't know it's April twenty third,
And so I caught her and I said, Mom, I'm
so sorry, happy birthday, and she said, it's okay, you
(36:21):
were just worried about your shoes.
Speaker 4 (36:23):
I was like, oh, yeah.
Speaker 3 (36:25):
Yeah, I was. I also forgot my dad's birthday I
think last year.
Speaker 4 (36:29):
But it's but I guess it's not a self absorbed thing.
Speaker 2 (36:32):
Well, it's like I'll tell her happy birthday later, and
then you cause you like, see it too early in
the morning, and then you forget and you put it later,
and then it's too late, and then like.
Speaker 4 (36:40):
Well, now you can schedule texts.
Speaker 3 (36:42):
What did I know this? Did you already tell me this?
Speaker 4 (36:44):
I don't think so.
Speaker 1 (36:45):
I knew you could schedule emails, you can schedule text now.
Speaker 2 (36:48):
Okay, I'm got to just schedule text for all the
birthdays the next year.
Speaker 4 (36:51):
Sick, sick, fire, the neess or something like that. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (36:59):
So, well, you know, we did went down a few
rabbit holes there air baths.
Speaker 3 (37:05):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (37:05):
So I was reading an article about I think I
was talking about embracing your uniqueness or your quirks. I
didn't get through much of the article because I was
stopped in my tracks when they brought up Benjamin Franklin
and his quirks. Do you know much about him?
Speaker 4 (37:20):
I mean, he found electricity and bifocals.
Speaker 3 (37:23):
Pretty sure.
Speaker 2 (37:25):
Apparently he was a really quirky, interesting guy, and which
makes sense because if he did all these like inventions,
he had to be a little He was a progressive thinker.
Speaker 3 (37:35):
I guess like us.
Speaker 1 (37:37):
Just like us, we invent words, saying sphrases, they go viral.
Speaker 2 (37:42):
And he did something called air bathing, and I was like,
what is air bathing? So I looked they just like
mentioned his air bass as if like everybody knew that
Benjamin Franklin took air baths and what they were, so
obviously you think of them and you're like, he's probably
basking in the air. Well, know what he would do,
is he for like an hour and a half or
(38:02):
so in the morning. The first thing he would do,
or one of the first things he would do, is
go into a room, open the windows, get completely nude
and bathe the air. And he thought it was literally cleansing.
He said it was more cleansing than actual baths.
Speaker 1 (38:14):
Okay, Benjamin, his air bathing is not.
Speaker 2 (38:17):
He said, cleaner than a bath, he said, I mean
maybe back then he would advocate for air baths, a
practice where he would sit naked in a room with
open windows, to expose his.
Speaker 3 (38:25):
Body to fresh air.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
He believed this practice, which he referred to as bracing
or a tonic bath, was beneficial for his health and
helped him maintain good health. He liked to practice with
cool morning air to energize himself and love the warm
afternoon sun to relax.
Speaker 1 (38:39):
Okay, so I get that. I mean, so he's a
little bit of ahead of his time. Yeah, oh yeah,
because we do stuff like well, because it's kind of
like a cold plunge, right, there are probably benefits to it.
But the thing that got me is he said it
says Franklin preferred air baths to actual water baths, believing
they were a more effective and agreeable way to cleanse
the body. That's where I like, Yeah, soap like maybe
(39:02):
cleansing mentally because you can get still and clear and calm.
Speaker 2 (39:07):
But like, but what was the like hygiene back then?
You know, I don't think they had the best hygiene, right,
So maybe they just weren't up on the times of
soap and water was probably more of a harded resource.
Speaker 1 (39:21):
To get I think about that when I like, when
I was watching Gilded Age, you know, did you watch that?
Speaker 3 (39:26):
No, you've talked about it before. So good. You watched
when is the Gilded.
Speaker 4 (39:29):
Age late eighteen hundreds?
Speaker 3 (39:31):
When was Benjamin Franklin alive?
Speaker 4 (39:34):
Shannon, That's one of those things.
Speaker 1 (39:37):
I know that Thomas Edison was in the Gilded Age,
Like he invented the light bulb around then, So I
don't know if the light bulb and electricity.
Speaker 4 (39:45):
Came at the same ish.
Speaker 2 (39:46):
Because Benjamin was the kite with the lightning, yes, right,
and the bifocal and bifocals.
Speaker 3 (39:53):
So we'll figure out seventeen hundreds.
Speaker 1 (39:56):
Oh wow, so he's Wow. He lived till eighty four,
so maybe he's onto something. Oh my god, that's old
for back then.
Speaker 3 (40:04):
Maybe he was lucky sort no, I mean.
Speaker 1 (40:07):
Maybe he's his air baths, like he probably did his
life better care.
Speaker 2 (40:12):
He probably was doing things that were really good for
your men going outside's understand. Oh, while I was gonna say,
he probably was doing things that were really good for
his mental health that impact his overall health. And he
didn't even know it, like if he went outside and
I mean now it's like, duh, the sun helps our health.
Speaker 3 (40:29):
But he was and that's hard for us to do now.
He was getting feuish here. Yeah, he naked he was
getting air baths. The wind was just cleansing his whole buddy.
Speaker 1 (40:41):
Well in the so the Gilded Age was about one
hundred years after he died. And they had these beautiful dresses,
you know, and they're like corsets and they're all what's
under the dress the like really the the white stuff
that like makes a tool, Oh, thank you, the tool, just.
Speaker 3 (41:01):
Say it like you would say a hammer tool tool. Yeah, okay, So.
Speaker 4 (41:06):
That stuff under their dress that's white and fluffy.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
All that I'm trying to say is when it comes
to hygiene, and they would it would be so hot
out and they have on these dresses. Like what did
they do to smell? Like did they have do you wonder?
I mean, I use all natural deodas, so maybe that's
what they were doing. Did they do coconut oil and
you know vanilla?
Speaker 3 (41:26):
What's that?
Speaker 4 (41:27):
Some essential oil with a little baking wait.
Speaker 3 (41:30):
A second, or soda? I never thought about that, well
we were, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (41:35):
I don't.
Speaker 1 (41:35):
I did. When I watch the show, I'm like, well,
they've got to be so hot, and I wonder if
they smell, and then they'll start like making out and
then do it and I'm like, oh, what am I doing.
Speaker 2 (41:43):
Also, if it was normal, then they probably would be like, oh,
it's the smell, that's what people smell like.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
Oh, they would use okay, Shannon to the rescue. In
the seventeenth centuries, people use variety of fragrant materials to
smell good, floral sense like roses, orange blossoms, jasmine, as
well as musky sense. Potpourrie was also popular for homes
and who they had gumback then perfumed gloves. Interesting do
(42:09):
you put gloves on and then to stick your gloves
under your arms?
Speaker 2 (42:11):
But also I see here Shannon's helping us out in
multiple different ways.
Speaker 3 (42:16):
Bats where we're for the rich.
Speaker 2 (42:19):
Bathing was for the availabity of water depending on your
social standing. So I don't know what Benjamin's social standing was.
I would assume it would have been high. He could
have been bathing. Maybe he was saving the baths for
the other people.
Speaker 1 (42:32):
Yeah, Oh my gosh, they used to bathe me. We're
bathing too much. That's what my boyfriend says, I shower
too much.
Speaker 3 (42:41):
I don't.
Speaker 2 (42:41):
I think he said it's bad for my skin, well,
my microbiome.
Speaker 3 (42:49):
I like to feel clean.
Speaker 1 (42:50):
Yeah, same, I'll incorporate an air bath into my routine.
Speaker 2 (42:55):
But also like depending on where can you we could
just open all the windows in my home and get naked.
Speaker 3 (43:01):
People can see through my windows.
Speaker 4 (43:03):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (43:03):
I picture Benjamin. He's probably on like a little like
house on a hill. No one's bothering him, Like, yeah,
neighbors right next door.
Speaker 3 (43:11):
That's Benjamin. He's air bathing, don't mind him.
Speaker 1 (43:14):
Yeah, well, air bats we did it. The more you
got it, now we cross that off. Every y'all try
it out. Let us know, but don't get busted for
like decent. What'ssure?
Speaker 3 (43:27):
You could just sit in a bathing suit.
Speaker 1 (43:30):
No, it has to be air baby to get it
all through the orifices. Some of this is making me
think of a story about cryocat which we need to
get her a mic so that she could speak on it,
so she doesn't have it. I'm just gonna throw this
out there for listeners in case any of them have
had this experience.
Speaker 4 (43:46):
And they know, like maybe what could be going on.
Speaker 1 (43:48):
But she's waking up smelling weird, like this never happened
o before. Like she could take a shower and go
to bed and in the morning she'll wake up and
she smells like Indian food, not even bo Indian food.
Speaker 3 (44:01):
Is there Indian food in her bath?
Speaker 1 (44:03):
That's what I said, Or like maybe in her water
shower like her neighbors.
Speaker 4 (44:06):
Are they cooking?
Speaker 1 (44:07):
No?
Speaker 3 (44:07):
Does that have to do with some of the supplements
you're taking?
Speaker 1 (44:09):
She thinks maybe, But I don't know if anybody else
has had this experience, just let us know. She thinks
it could potentially be too much testosterone or stress, like
any just has anybody else had an issue where they
wake up suddenly out of nowhere, smelling like Indian food
and they haven't eaten in any food, same diet all
the time she stacked her meals. But okay, maybe it
(44:34):
could be certain pepsil. Maybe it's on We don't know.
Speaker 2 (44:37):
I wish she was still having this problem because then
we could have her air bathe and see if it helped.
Speaker 4 (44:41):
Yeah, because she would do.
Speaker 1 (44:43):
That too much, soap, No problem there, all right?
Speaker 3 (44:46):
Kat?
Speaker 1 (44:46):
Where can people find us?
Speaker 2 (44:47):
On Instagram at you need it not you need therapy?
I keep doing that, that's okay? On Instagram at Feeling
Things podcast.
Speaker 1 (44:55):
Yes, and on YouTube TikTok all the things, and we
hope that you will email us. Hey, there at Feelingthings
podcast dot com and you can call and leave us
a voicemail eight seven seven two oh seven two oh
seven seven. All this stuff is in the show notes
as well. And lastly, have the day you need to have.
Speaker 3 (45:17):
Bye Bye,
Feeling Things with Amy & Kat News
Host
Amy Brown
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