Craving Change, Even When Life’s Fine

Speaker 1 (00:02):
Good.

Speaker 2 (00:03):
All right, break it down.

Speaker 3 (00:05):
If you ever have feelings that you just fonts Amy
and Cat gotcha covincking No, brother, ladies and folks, do you.

Speaker 2 (00:13):
Just follow an the spirit where it's on the front
and real stuff.

Speaker 3 (00:17):
To the chill stuff and the m but Swayne, sometimes
the best thing you can do it just stop you
feel things. This is feeling things with Amy and Kat.

Speaker 2 (00:29):
Happy Tuesday. Welcome to feeling things. I'm Amy and I'm Kat.
And today for our feeling of the day, well, Kat
and I both have one, and I feel like our
feeling is going to be similar or even the same.
So I just want to count to three and after
three we just say our feeling and we see if
it's the same. Okay, Okay, Am I gonna go one?
Two three or three?

Speaker 3 (00:47):
Two?

Speaker 2 (00:47):
One? Should we count up or down?

Speaker 3 (00:49):
Does it matter? Okay?

Speaker 4 (00:51):
Up?

Speaker 2 (00:51):
Okay? One two three? Gosh, I mean that's similar.

Speaker 3 (01:00):
Because wait, make sure that they heard what you said.

Speaker 2 (01:02):
I said accomplished and I am feeling in awe of
myself right and I know based on what we both
got done and accomplished in our lives recently and how
proud we are of ourselves. That's why I thought we
may have the same word, and I was going back
and forth between proud and accomplished and just all around

(01:27):
awesome but a tiny bit confused because it's like I've
asked myself a lot the last few days. Why am
I this way? Why am I this way?

Speaker 3 (01:37):
Well, okay, back up, why do you feel you're not
feeling in all of yourself? That's me? Why are you
feeling accomplished?

Speaker 2 (01:46):
Well? Kat and I have been living a very similar life.

Speaker 3 (01:53):
It's like we're synced up in more ways than one,
and we.

Speaker 2 (01:57):
Keep learning all these different ways. We're like, oh, it's
another thing where we're the same, and it likely is
just how our brains operate. Kat has been thinking about
moving and some of that has been underway, which is great.
But when things get you know, down to the wire
and stuff is starting to get real. I mean the motivation,

(02:19):
like the dopamine.

Speaker 3 (02:21):
The pressure. It's the pressure, but it's.

Speaker 2 (02:23):
Also exciting and I can't explain it. It's like there's
rush and things that I know you've been putting off
for a long time you finally were able to do.
I'm not really moving, but for a few days I
acted like I was because I found this house that
came on the market. That is me.

Speaker 3 (02:46):
Were you looking on Zillo Yeah.

Speaker 2 (02:48):
As a hobby, Yeah, it's really fun. And then this
house popped up and it spoke to me and I
was like, this is so great. Yeah, everything about it
is so perfect. And I did just move sort of recently.
Me moving now does not make sense, but I was
making it make sense, you know, Yeah, you just nag,

(03:12):
nagel that, and I'm like, it'll be fine and this
will be a good investment. And I was convincing myself.

Speaker 1 (03:18):
Well.

Speaker 2 (03:19):
Come to find out, during the week that I thought
I was moving, I got so much done. But now
I'm not moving. But the trick that I played on
my brain during that week was epic.

Speaker 3 (03:32):
So anytime you need to get something done, you have
to be like, I'm moving next week.

Speaker 2 (03:35):
But here's the thing, like, I think it has to
be kind of real. It feels now like it was
a trick on my brain because of how it ended up,
which ultimately came down to the wire because the house
got another offer from somebody else. So then now it's
like pressure's on. I need to put an offer in
if like I'm for real, for real, And suddenly everything

(03:56):
that was so perfect that I was seeing. I started
to see flaws in the and started to see how
this doesn't really make sense, and you know, silly things
like capital gains, like who cares if I haven't owned
my house for a year. And then it's like, yeah,
let's be responsible and not ridiculous. Although I do think
what I were to if this is what I convinced myself,

(04:16):
what I was going to lose in capital gains, i'd
make back because this is such a perfect investment. Yeah,
you told me that it may take five to ten years,
but it would be worth it.

Speaker 3 (04:25):
I had to stay in that house for that long, correct,
So when you sent me because I was on vacation
and you sent me that list of things you had
to do, the punch list, Yes, And I never thought
like in my head, I was like, wow, it's so random.
Time for her to finally be putting knobs on her refrigerator.
But good for her. I never thought like, she's probably

(04:48):
trying to move because you literally moved a year ago
and your house is like perfectly you like, maybe not perfect,
but like you've updated it to make it your style.
And then I was thinking moving is the worst. Why
would you want to do that?

Speaker 2 (05:04):
Moving is awful, It's totally awful, Like, I don't know
if I was just craving chaos. In fact, I texted
my friend Claire and she just replied back, is it
possible your brain is craving the dopamine hit of all
of this?

Speaker 3 (05:15):
Lol?

Speaker 2 (05:16):
And I was like, interesting, trying nice about it. It's
craving the dopamine hit or it's craving chaos, which you
know I used to see chaos in relationship. Well, now
if I don't have that, because my relationship is healthy too,
am I seeking chaos? Just like create make life more
complicated than it needs to be. But he took the

(05:36):
kids to look at the house and they were like, oh,
this is it was really cool great, took the boyfriend
to look at it. He of course picked out small
little details like things that bother like. He's like, look
at this trim work, and I'm like, trimwork, trimwork.

Speaker 3 (05:49):
It's fine.

Speaker 2 (05:50):
He's like, why are the outlets this way? And I
was like, I would never hopel that.

Speaker 3 (05:54):
I'm like, we'll get new plate covers like that.

Speaker 2 (05:58):
That's why He's like, well, but you have to look
like if this is what you're spending, this is what
you should be getting, and you want to pay attention
to these things. He's like, I'm not saying this stuff
is a is a no go or a no brainer.
But he's just way more analytical and I'm more of like,
but how about.

Speaker 3 (06:13):
The vibe, Like this wallpaper is really cool?

Speaker 2 (06:16):
Like what's the feeling you have right now? Because in
the backyard, I was like, feeling.

Speaker 3 (06:20):
I have is the crown molding is off. It's like
cheaply done, very really very Yeah.

Speaker 2 (06:26):
He's like, this is basically some two by four is
just thrown up here and painted black to look chic,
and I was like, well, it's giving, it's giving chic.
It's giving chic and I like it. And the backyard
was so zen.

Speaker 3 (06:39):
Well, in the backyard, I was like, was this an airbnb?
It felt like I said, to you, this looks like
a resort.

Speaker 2 (06:45):
Yeah, but it was quaint. It wasn't anything big or overwhelming.
In fact, there was no real yard to take care of.
Even though the yard was zen.

Speaker 3 (06:52):
It was like it was a zen garden. Yeah, Like
there was some.

Speaker 2 (06:55):
Plants that need to stay alive, but they had a
little sprinkler system.

Speaker 3 (06:57):
Attached to that, so I was like, this is do
aball person. Ye, well, would you have missed your backyard?

Speaker 5 (07:03):
No?

Speaker 2 (07:03):
I think I would have really enjoyed that space. But
congrats to whomever put in the offer that then made
me decide I'm not willing to be in a competition
for this house because it's really not for me. However,
I'm very thankful for the week that I was gonna
maybe do it, because yes, have I needed to pick
out knobs and pulls from my kitchen drawers and cabinets
for nine to twelve months, Absolutely, And have I had

(07:26):
any urgency to do so, No, But then you make
me make decisions and I can order curtains. I can.
I mean, obviously some of the things I had to
hire people to do, but it's like the thought of
spending that money was now like, it's okay, we just
need to get this done. Although I will say I
got a quote to paint my laundry room and it
was ridiculous, So Sashira and I painted the laundry room myself,

(07:49):
so that also felt good.

Speaker 3 (07:51):
You're in process of painting the launder room.

Speaker 2 (07:53):
Yeah, but it's by the time this airs it will
be being painted. Yeah, thanks for that.

Speaker 3 (08:00):
I'm just trying to keep you on it.

Speaker 2 (08:02):
But you started it, I did, Yeah, and it will
be finished. Yeah, future me, it's finished.

Speaker 3 (08:09):
That's so funny that Alex said that when you brought
him to the house, because when I brought my dad,
not Patrick, because Patrick's brain's kind of like me. He's like,
this is the best thing ever. I brought my dad
to one of the houses we were looking at. I
knew within thirty seconds. I was like, you hate this house,
don't you. He's like, I don't hate it. My mom
was like, just let him do his thing. He's like, well,

(08:29):
you need a new water heater and he was like,
I'm gonna go into the crawl space. He's like do
you have a flashlight? And I'm like, you have one
on your phone and like just say that you hate
the house. And he was like, I don't hate the house.
You just need to do this. You need to do this,
You need to do this, you need do this. It's
gonna be a lot of work and the floor sucks
and blah blah blah blah. And I was like, Okay,

(08:49):
you hate the house. However, when I went to see
that house for the second time, there's a dead bunny
in the yard.

Speaker 2 (08:55):
Is that a sign?

Speaker 3 (08:56):
Yes? I said that to Patrick, I said, we can
get this house, so dead bunny in the backyard. What
if the.

Speaker 2 (09:02):
Dead bunny is good luck?

Speaker 3 (09:05):
Because would that be a sign of good luck?

Speaker 2 (09:07):
Because when I first bought this house, there was a
dead blue jay a couple months after I moved here.
And my dad is a blue jay. I know this
is gonna sound psychotic, but you know how my mom
is a cardin all, my dad is a blue jay. Well,
then there was a dead blue jay right outside my
back porch, like under this beautiful tree.

Speaker 3 (09:26):
Alive blue jay.

Speaker 2 (09:28):
Sure you would think. But then I googled the meaning
behind it or what it could mean, and it was
about new beginnings.

Speaker 3 (09:35):
Dead rabbit.

Speaker 2 (09:36):
Me. Well, we just need to look it up. You
can make anything mean what you want it to mean.
I'll figure it out.

Speaker 3 (09:41):
Don't worry. We didn't get that house, so I hope
it doesn't mean that house.

Speaker 2 (09:45):
Oh, I thought that that was the one that was.

Speaker 3 (09:46):
The first house you're excited about. And also my dad
does know a lot about houses. He builds houses, so
I was like, dad hates it. Like I need to
think about this again, and then yeah, you start to
see things You're like, why isn't there any trim around anything?
Or why is this this way? Or this bathroom would
be a lot of work, and then you're putting together
all the money you would pay to fix the things,

(10:07):
and then you're like, why could just get a nicer house.
So then we found another house and my dad liked
it a lot better. But it was just funny that
I'm like, it's perfect. My Dad's like, no, it's not.
But that's another thing that was actually very helpful in
this process of looking at houses, because I get so
excited and I'm like, yeah, let's just sign the contract now.

(10:29):
And then my brother was helping me look at houses,
and he was like, not everything is perfect about this house.
There are some great things about it, but it's not perfect.
And so it helped me take some of the emotion
out of it so I could make a wise decision
and not just like be excited about the idea of moving,
because I had to actually spend a whole session of

(10:50):
my own therapy trying to figure out am I wanting
to do this because the dopamine hit and I want
something exciting and I want to be able to control
something because a lot of my life is out of
control and I can't plan a trip right now, or
is this the right thing for me to do right
now in my life? And it's the right thing.

Speaker 2 (11:08):
So it turns out that it is the right thing.
That I think it's good that you took the time
to process that. Whenever decisions we have going on, I
think sometimes we can move too quickly with the emotion.
Thankfully I had the other people that were swooping into
buy the house because it allowed me to pause, because
otherwise I was riding those emotions and they were rad
and high.

Speaker 3 (11:27):
And then you would get this house and you'd be
like shoot, and.

Speaker 2 (11:29):
I was like hop on, everybody, buckle up or buying
a house, and most people were like, huh, this is weird,
this is weird, But okay. I could also appreciate those
that were being really supportive and excited too, because we
could make it make sense. But you and I both
are just thankful for the motivation and the dope mean

(11:51):
that we got out of our situations. Because Kat has
been selling things on Facebook marketplace left and right, and
I want you to go over your list of things
that you've been able to sell, because if people walk
away from this episode with anything, it is that I'm
in kisage right now from Facebook from a buyer from
a buyer. She's been wheeling and dealing the whole time
she's been at my house, and it's like, you can

(12:13):
be a money magnet. You likely have things all over
your house that you could sell and make an extra
Oh shoo, hundred three hundred, or in Cat's case, she's
made seven hundred dollars in the last week. What are
you oh shooting?

Speaker 3 (12:27):
I was distracted and I'm being bad at Facebook Marketplace
because I told somebody they could come get this furniture,
but I already sold that set.

Speaker 2 (12:37):
Your rating's going down.

Speaker 3 (12:38):
Oh shoot, okay.

Speaker 2 (12:41):
Well we're doing a podcast, ight now.

Speaker 3 (12:46):
Let me read you Okay. I will say. If I've
learned anything through this move, it's that I can make
a buck fast by going through all my classes. And
they had four sets of patio furniture in my backyard
that I never sat in.

Speaker 2 (13:01):
Your backyard isn't even big.

Speaker 3 (13:02):
Where was this stuff? I have a nice size s
backyard for where I live. It was all in the
corner of my backyard, collecting dust.

Speaker 2 (13:10):
I wasn't like Dissy, your backyard sucks, no God, but
I'm just clarifying for people. It sounds like you had
four different patio sets, like how does al.

Speaker 3 (13:21):
Was piled together? It didn't look nice? Oh okay, yeah yeah,
And I actually didn't buy any of them. They're all
like patio furniture that my mom got new patio furniture
and kept giving me her old stuff. So I really
made a lot of money because I'm selling things that
people gave to me for free.

Speaker 2 (13:38):
Smaller.

Speaker 3 (13:39):
But my friend told me, she said, write down everything
you sell, because when you sell something for like five dollars,
it feels like, oh, this is a waste of time.
But then when you look at it, all I've made like,
well if that if I would have told that person
the right thing, I would have made like eight hundred dollars.
We're in the seven hundreds. Do you want to know
what I sold?

Speaker 2 (13:58):
Yes?

Speaker 3 (13:58):
Okay, guys, you can sell anything. I sold a opened
pack of bubbles for my wedding.

Speaker 2 (14:05):
I sold it like bottles with bubblic.

Speaker 3 (14:08):
Individual little We didn't use them because it rained.

Speaker 2 (14:10):
Did they say like Cat and Patrick Forever?

Speaker 3 (14:12):
No, they have like little hearts on the end of them.
I don't know where the why some of them were
taken because we didn't use them, but anyway, somebody bought those.
I sold a digital camera that I bought when I
was gonna start recording episodes of You Need Therapy, and
then I was like, this is too hard, so that
I sold an umbrella that I found in my storage bin.

(14:33):
I didn't even know I had it. I never opened it.

Speaker 2 (14:35):
An umbrella like a I'm sorry, a patio brea.

Speaker 3 (14:41):
I could have sold umbrella. I sold patio furniture, rain boots,
a clothing rack, disco ball planters, drink dispensers from my wedding,
a sparkle backdrop wall and easel to hold a sign,
my second option of shoes from my wedding that I
never wore, two dresses from Anthropology, two alo sports bras,

(15:02):
a purse, and sound panels well packing.

Speaker 2 (15:07):
That clothes were on there. I mean, I guess I've
always thought poshmark for clothes and furniture and house goods
for Facebook Marketplace or you know, bicycles or yeahs even
but I didn't know dresses. So that's good information because
then you don't have to pay the cut to Poshmark.

Speaker 3 (15:23):
No, but I will say I sold them for low dollar.
I think I could have sold them for more on Poshmark, okay,
and then lost that. I just wanted them gone gone.

Speaker 2 (15:32):
Because you were in You're in the mood, you're wheeling
in dealing.

Speaker 3 (15:34):
Yes, And now I'm like, oh, I can get something
nice for my new house and it will feel like
it was free exactly girl the math.

Speaker 2 (15:42):
Yeah, oh guess what I feel like because I didn't
get that house. I have way more money.

Speaker 3 (15:49):
So I get that too. Like I was like, I've
just made so much fun.

Speaker 2 (15:53):
I was like, so sure, do you want to go
shopping because like, I just feel well, it was tax
free weekends. So I also wanted to get her back
to school things. But I felt like I shopped more
for her with ease because I thought, look, all is funny.
I just saved not moving. I didn't lose capital gains.
This is amazing. What else do we need? I mean,

(16:14):
it doesn't make sense at all. I get that it
does for a second, It just like the feeling is different.
And when I was at Target though, because I was
trying to declutter my house, I was like not allowing
myself to buy anything except for this one lamp that
is going to look so cute in my living room.
But then also my ADHD brain, which is why I

(16:35):
am the way I am about the knobs and the polls,
Like I don't want it's overwhelming to make a decision
on which knobs, but I'm under pressure. I'll just make
a decision about the knobs, which I was able to do,
which is why I feel accomplished well with the lamp.
I wanted to feel accomplished as well with that. So
I get home and I bust open the box and
it's a complicated situation. It's not there's three parts, and

(16:58):
it's like one of those overhangs, like it's going to
stretch over the couch and hang there with like three
little and there is like shades. So I start putting
it together, just assembling it willing only I'm like, oh
this stan's okay, mm hm, just this way. I put
it in the position where it's going to be behind
the couch, and I start building it from the bottom up,

(17:18):
and then I sort of get to the top and
I'm stuck, and I think, okay, well that's fine, I'll
go look at the instructions. Now that I'm to this point,
so I look at the instructions and at the top
it says in all letters, this is a two person assembly.
Please do it on the floor, like a carpeted area
on the floor near where you want it. I had
it exactly where I wanted, standing straight up.

Speaker 3 (17:40):
But this is like on the hard way.

Speaker 2 (17:41):
They want you to lay it down on the carpet
assemble it from the top down. So I had already
done it all wrong and backwards, so all my hard
work is undone, and then I'm over it at that point,
so the lamp is just like that, not finished out
there by the couch, and now I'm not selling my house,
so I don't have the motivation to finish it, and

(18:02):
I lost all my energy to do it. So I'm
an idiot and didn't look at the instructions, and I'm like,
why am I this way? So then I got hyper
fixated on the position of my couch and for the
next hour I kept inching it like you know, a
quarter of an inch, half an inch, an inch to
the left of the right front back until I got
it in the right position, which if I dedicated that

(18:23):
hour to breading the instructions and doing the lamp. The
lamp would be done, but something about hyperfixating on the
couch like felt better to me.

Speaker 3 (18:30):
Well, also, you want to the feeling of getting it done,
like I think I got addicted to Facebook marketplace because
like the feeling of making a sale. Yeah, it's like
you know, yes, and so like the feeling of getting
the couch where you want it, like that can happen
faster than you having to redo the lamp, Like I
want another easy task, but I know to.

Speaker 2 (18:50):
Read the instructions. I know this, but instructions are boring
to me, and I'd rather do trial and error, which
is what I'm in the middle of. And another reasons
are overwhelming.

Speaker 3 (19:00):
Rather, you create chaos in your life by not reading
the instructions of putting together your lamp than you moving.
So if you need a little chaos, just go buy
something that needs to be assembled and do it without
the instructions.

Speaker 2 (19:13):
And then give up on it halfway and then it
just leave it there, yeah, until Shannon helps me or something.
Speaking of Shannon, she found the symbolism.

Speaker 3 (19:22):
Of a dead bunny. Oh am, I gonna like it.

Speaker 2 (19:24):
A dead rabbit can signify a loss, a need to
let go of something, or transition in life like a relationship,
a phase of life, or even a particular mindset. So
I needed to let go of that house. Well, you
needed to let go of some maybe that house. But
also I felt like, in your house buying.

Speaker 3 (19:41):
Process, you can tell me your feedback.

Speaker 2 (19:44):
Okay, I have feedback here. I started to think. Halfway
through my thought, I was like, I don't want this
to come out rude. Yeah, because like I don't know
you're I'm not trying to tell you.

Speaker 3 (19:53):
What to do.

Speaker 5 (19:53):
But you did have a little bit of a lack mindset.
You did have a little bit of a lack mindset, yeah,
And I wanted you to think with more abundance.

Speaker 2 (20:14):
So I just kept texting you. You're a money magnet,
You're a house magnet. You make money, Circulating money brings
you joy, which obviously these are just playful things. It's
not totally real, but in case it is real, and
keep saying it.

Speaker 3 (20:31):
I did have a black mindset because I didn't want
to get myself. I'm doing a lot of things right
now that are costing me a lot of money. Well,
that costs a lot of money. So I also know
myself and.

Speaker 2 (20:46):
They're important things.

Speaker 3 (20:47):
Yes, yes, yes, yes, But I also am somebody who
like I talked about. I don't know if it was
last week or the week before, but I do things
without thinking, and that usually works very well for me.
But I don't do big financial risks without so I
had to think about this stuff. And I don't know
that I have like money trauma. I think I just

(21:08):
like having money in the bank versus like But then
my financial advisor even said, he said, what's the point
of having money if you're not spending it? Like, what's
the point of making money in your life and working
really hard and then just like letting it sit there forever?

Speaker 2 (21:21):
You can't go to heaven with trailer hitch.

Speaker 3 (21:23):
That's what they say. That's what financial advisor was saying. That.

Speaker 2 (21:28):
Then who's the guy from Sugarland? The guy Christian? I
was gonna say Christian Bale, but that's Batman, Christian Johnson,
Christian Christian from Sugarland. I think he has a song
like that. He had sugar Land the band, and then
he had his own Christian Bush. Yes, that's it. I
think he has a song literally called.

Speaker 3 (21:47):
Okay came to Heaven with the trailer, Hitch.

Speaker 2 (21:50):
Houston's probably gonna cut that out. Houston told us. Our
producer told us the other day that for the podcast,
sometimes Kat and I will start singing and he's like,
just say, y'all know, I've been editing some of that
out because we give him. We give him full control.

Speaker 3 (22:06):
And you said, wait what yes, editing out our jingles
that go on for far too long? How dare you? Yeah,
which is probably.

Speaker 2 (22:16):
Why we're no longer like a feeling of.

Speaker 3 (22:18):
The day, because I think it was quite annoying.

Speaker 2 (22:22):
Yeah, in Houston let us know because he does have
full control for that, and we trust him and we
don't go back and listen, and so we had no idea.
He's like, hey, just so y'all know, I've been making
the executive decision to cut out some of your singing.
And we're like, oh, I literally did reply, Wait.

Speaker 3 (22:40):
What's on YouTube's still on YouTube? Yeah, because Kat diden
edited out of there.

Speaker 2 (22:49):
But so yeah, if you want the singing YouTube.

Speaker 3 (22:52):
Subscribe to her YouTube channel. If we want to hear us, Yeah,
we want the musical version subscribed to for our YouTube channel, like.

Speaker 2 (23:00):
And subscribe, which Cryocat's in here she does our video,
and she was the one that helped me move my
furniture to begin with. Like I was able to move
it inch by inch by myself, like just rear, but
to rearrange how I rearrange because I flipped it and
put the couch on the other side in the chairs.

Speaker 3 (23:17):
Wait, I'm just putting this together. You guys did that
by yourself. Just couch is so big?

Speaker 2 (23:21):
Yeah, me and cat, but I would say cat mostly,
or it's not, it's not.

Speaker 3 (23:26):
Cats, like she just watched me.

Speaker 2 (23:29):
Well, what had happened was I have golfer's elbow, Oh,
which is that's what they call pain in the inner
part of your elbow. And it's not necessarily from golf.
It's just like tennis elbow is the outside like a
dull pain, like a throbbing pain. And like even right

(23:50):
now when I press it, it's tender. Someone said it's
brought on by perimenopause. This is when I was painting
the laundry.

Speaker 3 (23:59):
Everything I feel like perrimonte. Pause. Now what if it's
just like you that motion hurt your arm for it?

Speaker 2 (24:05):
I mean it could be, but also yes, I do
agree with you that everything feels like perimenopause or ADHD.

Speaker 3 (24:12):
Yeah, in my life. So maybe this was just like
because you were working.

Speaker 2 (24:16):
Well, you wait till you're forty four and then hit
me out when you when you're mid forties, and it.

Speaker 3 (24:23):
I can still paint.

Speaker 2 (24:24):
Like for example, I was with my boyfriend on I
guess this was this last weekend. So it was on
a Saturday. Had it been a great day, great Saturday,
you know the kind of Saturday we'd all held for
and we had plans to just like go hang out.
We were going to maybe go to the driving range,
hit some golf balls, and then go grab a bite

(24:44):
to eat, real low key way to wind down.

Speaker 3 (24:48):
Did you even with your golfer A yeah, wow, Well.

Speaker 2 (24:52):
I hadn't it. I we didn't, so you didn't know.
We didn't go telling say you could hit golf balls,
but you can't move the couch. Now, I haven't hit
a golf ball, because I'll tell you what happened. Okay,
All of a sudden, out of nowhere, like thirty minutes
before we're about to go, I start to just get
really uncomfortable. Everything is uncomfortable, and I am physically just fit.
I don't know, can't explain it. I'm annoyed, I'm uncomfortable,

(25:16):
and I'm aware. I'm like, what is happening. This does
not feel right and we were just having a good day.
I have nothing to be annoyed at. Then all of
a sudden, I get sad, and then I really start
to worry because I have nothing to be sad about.
I even look at him and I just said, I'm
uncomfortable and I feel sad and this is freaking me
out because We've had a great day and life is good.

(25:37):
I have nothing to be sad about. And then he's like, okay,
so he starts kind of rubbing my shoulder like he's like,
just take a few deep breaths, and I'm like and
then all of a sudden, tears just start flooding down
my face, like I can't stop them, and I'm just
sitting there and I was like, I don't even know
what's happening. I'm not sad right now, Like I don't
feel sad, but I have to cry and I'm crying

(26:01):
and I can't explain it. That's very menopausal.

Speaker 3 (26:05):
You can't tell me otherwise.

Speaker 2 (26:06):
So then he's like, well, maybe we need to just
like what would feel good for you right now. And
so I sat there, I cried as much as I could,
and then you know, crying released his chemicals that helped
you feel better. So I felt a little better, and
I was like, maybe we should just go for a walk.
So when we were at his house, so we just
walked outside, went for a walk, and then his son

(26:26):
was home and we were gonna end up if we
hit golf balls. We were just going to eat by ourselves.
And then his son was like going to figure something out,
so we were like, let's just go, Let's take him,
take him out to eat. He'd probably love that. And
so we ended up doing a little mini family dinner
with one of our five kids. And it was a
totally different night than what we had planned, like our
cute little date night got hijacked by my hormones. But

(26:50):
it ended up being better was what I needed. But
I have no idea why. I just started crying, and
I was thinking, he's never experienced whatever that was, Like
he's experienced me so nap a little bit at times.
Not whatever that was was really weird, and he handled
it like a champ. I must say, you've cried in
front of him, yes, but there was a legit reason.
If I've cried in front of him, it's been like,

(27:13):
you know, going on like yeah, yeah, are kids ever
going to get along? Or I'm going to meet your
wife that passed away and spend the weekend with her family,
and I'm overwhelmed by that, Like those are when I like,
that's valid tears. This was unexplainable.

Speaker 3 (27:28):
Okay, that's different than like I was painting all day
and then I got this injury, but it couldn't be
from the painting. In that motion, it's probably from Perry,
but that's different.

Speaker 2 (27:38):
Yeah, well I was saying like that's explainable, but also
I don't know, I'm.

Speaker 3 (27:42):
Maybe I could also be wrong. I'm not I know
nothing about Perrymuntahause.

Speaker 2 (27:46):
Well, there's just fun things like that to look forward to,
Like when do you and Patrick You're forty four and
you and Patrick are going to be having the great
day and you're about to go hit some golf balls
and then all of a sudden you're like.

Speaker 3 (27:55):
Well, I had my week two what was it two
weeks ago when I just was like crying, But you
know why that's happening.

Speaker 2 (28:00):
Yeah, that's hormones too.

Speaker 3 (28:02):
Yeah, that was weird. I felt sad though this was
it was so weird because I was like, I'm not
sad right now, golf balls. I don't need any a
kid who's like overtired, who's like I want to go by. Yeah,
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (28:18):
I think if it was more was it like whiney.
I was just more like purplay.

Speaker 3 (28:22):
Like I was like, you want to go do something,
but then like you're feeling this way at the same time.
That don't make sense.

Speaker 2 (28:27):
We're speaking a cry. Okay, we were talking about the
golferslf on moving the furniture or whatever. But I was
on the phone with her before I did that. She
was like, what are you doing? And I was like, well,
I think, Alex, I'm gonna go hit golf balls or whatever.
And she was like do you like doing that? Like
she goes, is this something you want to do? And
I was like yeah, I went weird. Yeah, I guess
if you're just like you're with the right person, great
interest change.

Speaker 3 (28:47):
So I had a roommate. She's still one of my
best friends, Kira. You've met her. She lived with me
for like a year and she was dating her now
husband and he's a big golf. For This was pre
Patrick too, so I never had golfed in my life,
and she would always like get dressed and I was like,
I'm gonna go to the golf course with Jay whatever.

(29:10):
And I remember multiple times being like that sucks. Like
I remember being like, oh, you've just found your day
at the golf course, and she's like, it's actually kind
of fun. And then I met Patrick and I was like, Kyra,
low key, I love golf. I mean, I don't want
to do eighteen holes. You went and bought clubs. Okay,

(29:30):
first of all, I did not buy clubs. Patrick bought
me clubs, but that was a gift for him. It
wasn't a gift for me. He wanted me to have
my own clubs. You would like them, but I didn't
like them. But they're purple, and I like going to
do like nine holes. I really would love if they
did like six holes. That would be sweet. This is
where I lose interest. But when I gave a speech
at Kira's wedding and one of the things I like

(29:51):
had a list of things that had like learned from
her and Jay, and one of them was about golf.
And I said, I said, what you just said, it
doesn't matter as much what you're doing but the person
that you're doing it with, because I now love golfing
with Patrick. And it's not that I now love the
game of golf, it's when you're doing something with somebody else,
and I also get to see the joy Patrick has.

(30:13):
And then I'm like, oh, I can kind of enjoy this,
but I think I more so just like being with him.

Speaker 2 (30:19):
You know, it's exactly what it is. And you get
to wear a cute outfit. Yes, And I was about
to say, speaking of the outfits, I found some cute
ones on Amazon. I'll have to send you the link.

Speaker 3 (30:30):
Oh, you're gonna say, Facebook Marketplace.

Speaker 2 (30:33):
I didn't know to look for clothes on there, but
maybe I'll check it out because I look for other
things on Facebook Marketplace, like I sell and I shop there, like,
yeah all the time, like trying to look for things.
I don't have a lot of luck, but I have sometimes. Yeah,
Like there's a few things that I've missed. Oh like
my dining room table and my chairs.

Speaker 3 (30:54):
That was clutch. That was a really goodbye, really good
ye CEB two.

Speaker 2 (30:58):
Yeah, and they're pretty much brand new. Speaking of cry,
she went and carried that pick Oh.

Speaker 3 (31:03):
Really the truck too. Yeah, she picks up a mattress
for you.

Speaker 1 (31:12):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (31:13):
I think she's my strong friend, strong friend. Oh yeah,
I think it was forbidden because she's friends been too.
So we were moving stuff.

Speaker 3 (31:24):
Hey I'm moving soon. You got cryokat.

Speaker 2 (31:30):
So you were on vacation, yes, which was really exciting,
But I was on vacation.

Speaker 3 (31:38):
I was on real vacation.

Speaker 2 (31:43):
And you said you read a book there that you
want to recommend because you have a book and I
have a show.

Speaker 3 (31:49):
So I don't know about you, but I really get
my like reading bug when I'm on vacation, and then
I want to read every book after that and I can't.
I've learned that this book has a sequel, Perfect Marriage.
It was so good and well, I don't want to
say anything. I don't want to say anything, but you give.

Speaker 2 (32:09):
It like five I'm not marriages out of five.

Speaker 3 (32:14):
I would give it a four point five out of five.
That's good. And there's a sequel, so like, that's exciting.
It doesn't have to be over yet. I read it
so fast. I read it and like because the first
maybe three or four days of vacation, I didn't read
it all because I was playing you know, I.

Speaker 2 (32:29):
Go with your nieces and.

Speaker 3 (32:32):
Yeah, so my nieces and nephews. It was really cute
to watch them on the beach and like jump in
the water with them. But then once people got their
like playing jitters out, then I read three days finished
it and I gasped at the end. I was sitting
next to Patrick and I go ah, and he was like, well,
now you have to tell me what happened.

Speaker 2 (32:52):
Well, that's how I feel about We Were Liars, because
you're watching that right now, and when that ending happened.
I guess.

Speaker 3 (32:58):
Yeah, I'm trying to figure out because I'm on I'm
in the middle of the seventh episode and there's eight episodes,
and I know something crazy happens, so I know it's
not going to be what I think it is.

Speaker 2 (33:09):
I'm not saying anything because I don't want to run
the rest of spoiling anything at all other than I
also gassed. So You've Got the Perfect Marriage is a
book that'll make you gasp, We Were Liars, which is
on Amazon.

Speaker 3 (33:19):
Can I your gasp?

Speaker 2 (33:20):
No?

Speaker 3 (33:21):
No, I can't even guess.

Speaker 2 (33:22):
Because then other people.

Speaker 3 (33:23):
Okay, I'm going to write it down after this and
once we've had enough time, Oh.

Speaker 2 (33:29):
You could say it to me off Mike. I just
don't want to ruin it everybody else.

Speaker 3 (33:32):
You know, I'm going to write it down so then
I can read it on Mike and be like, see
I guessed it right.

Speaker 2 (33:37):
Okay, Well, We Were Liars is something you're watching. I've
already finished, but that's not what I was going to recommend.
I thought I was bringing something new to the table
because this is also on Amazon.

Speaker 3 (33:47):
Is.

Speaker 2 (33:47):
When I finished We Were Liars, it rolled into like
a different series, which is Shiny Happy People about the
Dugger Family, a documentary. Yeah, and I mind blown, like
things that I learned and saw. It was like unbelievable
stuff that I've forgotten about their family. And it's just

(34:08):
crazy that that the dad thought like I'm gonna put
my family on TV and like this sort of stuff
is going to be happening, and this is how I'm
going to handle it. It's just sort of like that
I'm the head of the house. Probably mentality of.

Speaker 3 (34:21):
Like, well, what I'm not going to occasion it's like
a no, it's that weird.

Speaker 2 (34:25):
I can't remember. Maybe Shannon can look at the exact
because I don't want to get that.

Speaker 3 (34:29):
It's very obedient.

Speaker 2 (34:30):
It's like a fundamentalist.

Speaker 3 (34:32):
Yeah, okay, So you were telling me that and I
was like, I think i've I watched it when it
came out.

Speaker 2 (34:37):
Yes, it's not new. Come to find out. You were like,
I feel like this's been out for a while. So
I just googled it and it came out in twenty
twenty three, so it's been out a couple of years.

Speaker 3 (34:44):
But I have I don't remember a lot of like
you're saying all this and I'm like, what was shocking?

Speaker 2 (34:48):
And I forget, Oh, well, it's okay, so one thing,
and this isn't spoiling anything. But the adult daughter, she
is prominently in it, and then one of his nieces
is talking about it. But the adult daughter and her cousin,
I mean, they were kids when the show started, but
as they matured and got older and they even got married,
and then they were used on the show. They never

(35:09):
got paid because he was the one that TLC had
in the contract. They paid the dad and then I
guess he could disperse. And there was a time where
she was having a birthing episode where she was pregnant,
specially giving birth and she was like I'm not I
don't want cameras in there. Or her dad like the
day before her wedding or something, he just casually like

(35:29):
had the contract down on the table, was like, hey, babe,
I need you to sign this, and she kind of
ran by. And obviously she's a lot going on. She's
getting married the next day, so she didn't pay attention
to every detail and she signed it. Well, it was like,
I'm making this up, but like say, it was a
five year deal, well after her marriage, when she's pregnant
with her first child, that's within that five year window.
And then she's like, oh, well, we don't want cameras

(35:51):
in but part of the contract was well you don't
have a choice, and.

Speaker 3 (35:56):
She wasn't getting paid.

Speaker 2 (35:57):
And then she was like, well TLC, can y'all give
up us money for this because and they're like, oh, well,
our deal is with your dad and we're paying him handsomely.
So then they went to the dad and said we
would like payment, and he said I can pay you
ten dollars an hour. Oh isn't that into Okay?

Speaker 3 (36:14):
Maybe I didn't finish it because I don't remember that. Yeah,
just crazy stuff like that that feels very I llegal,
especially with the kids. I think now I don't know.

Speaker 2 (36:22):
What the laws are, but they were adult that's why.

Speaker 3 (36:24):
Right. But in California there there's some law that's changed
about like influencers and stuff where if you're using your
kids as part of whatever, you have to pay them.
So that's why a lot of people are moving out
of California. I feel like, I don't know that they
can like so they don't have to do because they
lose money. There's some weird law that like you are
losing people.

Speaker 2 (36:44):
That like you are losing money protect children, right, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, No,
I mean that's weird.

Speaker 3 (36:49):
I'm not condoning it. I'm just saying I think there's
something like that going on.

Speaker 2 (36:53):
It's okay, let's see Dugger religion independent Fundamentalist Baptists affiliated
with the Institute and basically Principles. That's well IBLP, Yes, IBLP,
a conservative Chritian organization. And then there's that one guy.
I feel like the church I grew up too. They
would listen to stuff by him, but there was a
lot of his seminars that he would do and they
were very much in alignment with his stuff. And that

(37:15):
guy was just like spreading his.

Speaker 3 (37:18):
But it's like a kind of cult.

Speaker 2 (37:20):
Yeah, he feels a little a little weird.

Speaker 3 (37:23):
Okay, well, maybe I'll watch this again, even though it's
an old wreck.

Speaker 2 (37:26):
Apparently there's a season two of something that season one.

Speaker 3 (37:31):
But is it about a different family.

Speaker 2 (37:32):
Potentially it could be about something completely different.

Speaker 3 (37:35):
Well that makes me sad, though, because I watched was
it nineteen Kids in Counting? Yeah, where they kept changing
that or actually I watched that and I was like, oh,
this family seems so nice.

Speaker 2 (37:45):
No, no, it's a mess. I remember the brother he
like did inappropriate things with the sisters. And then the
one of the sisters that it had happened to, she's
the one that is now part of the documentary, and
was saying, oh, yeah, I never got paid like she's
she even oh she did. I would maybe find that interesting.

(38:08):
She seems like a really sweet person, and I'm glad
that her and her husband are kind of out of that.
But yeah, no, nothing about that seemed healthy. And they
interviewed other people that were watching the show that were
part of that religion and they or had grown up
in that religion, or at least were married to men
like that in the religion, and they felt very suppressed,

(38:29):
and they were like, no way TLC is putting this
on there because they know what life is like really
when the cameras aren't rolling, because they know how these
homes work, and so they're having to watch it and
being like, oh my gosh, like this is my life.
But in america's like eating this up and these people
are gaining fame. But when it's just not a healthy situation.

Speaker 3 (38:51):
That's a lesson though that. I mean, it's hard because
if the content's interesting, we want to watch it. But
it's that John and Kate plus eight like that was
nothing what it seemed. Did you not watch that? Yeah?
I loved that show, but like I think, what.

Speaker 2 (39:07):
I don't know, it's just interesting. You're like I loved
nineteen Kids Accounting and John in Place, John and Kate,
let's say.

Speaker 3 (39:12):
And I love No Mom. I loved Breaking Amish too.

Speaker 2 (39:15):
Oh I don't know.

Speaker 3 (39:17):
Oh that one was cool. They I guess when you're
Amish you get to have like this experience, I mean,
says this show. I don't know if this is actually true,
but you could have this experience where you go into
the real world and then they have to make the
decision do I want to come back into my amish
world or do I want to live here? But if

(39:37):
I live out in the real world, I'm cut off
from everybody. So you're watching these teenagers or like young
adults go and experience things for the first time, like
going to a movie theater or drinking or just like
going to a mall. Stuff like that. Like with Freedom,
I bet a lot of it was not true now
that I'm talking about it.

Speaker 2 (39:57):
Or maybe it was much like fuck, you'll believe anything.

Speaker 3 (40:02):
Actually, Okay, Now I watched this in like middle school. Yeah,
because it's.

Speaker 2 (40:07):
Like twelve fast forward to the you now, like you
are very skeptical.

Speaker 3 (40:12):
Which is why I'm a skeptic, because breaking.

Speaker 2 (40:13):
Homage, which is why you wanted to do our Mel
Robin's Deep Dive.

Speaker 3 (40:18):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (40:19):
So this is a good transition into the really cool
voicemail that we got. So this is a good transition
into the really cool voicemail that we got from a

(40:42):
fellow licensed therapist. She's a listener from Florida, and we're
gonna play her voicemail. No, and this is about the
Mel Robin's Deep Dive episode that we did about the
Leton theory.

Speaker 1 (40:57):
I usually never called because I feel leaving voicemails, but
I think the greeting really put me at ease.

Speaker 4 (41:02):
For one, but I'm listening to the Mill Robin seep
Dive and I'm not even all the way done, but
I felt so inclined that I had to pause it and.

Speaker 1 (41:10):
Came because as a therapist, I, like some therapists in Florida,
I'm finding myself saying yes, oh my gosh, yes, I'm
putting my finger on exactly why I've been struggling with
the self help world, because at first I thought maybe
I was jealous that people are so successful in this
realm and maybe I'm not at that level, but I

(41:30):
really have a hard time finding a way to monetize
the help and the fact that therapy really isn't all
that sexy and it's a really slow process to create
lasting change.

Speaker 4 (41:40):
So I just thank you for the conversation. I appreciate
it great things.

Speaker 2 (41:46):
So that was nice and from someone that's in the
space that you're in that sometimes can be challenging.

Speaker 3 (41:53):
And I like that she said. A part of her
was like, maybe I'm just jealous because this person's successful,
because I've had to ask myself that a lot of like, well,
is this just like a jealous not able to be
like happy for other people, or is this skeptical because
there feels like there's some manipulation or there's some false advertising.

(42:14):
So I feel that too sometimes, Well.

Speaker 2 (42:17):
You did a great job with the Deep Dive, I
gotta say. I went back and watched it on YouTube,
and I was a little nervous, especially because I was
the Mel Robbins fan, and I think I've said five
hundred times I didn't want to feel like a bash
session because also we don't want to be mean grel
known for just like not having space for everybody or

(42:38):
putting people down. And also we can be a space
where research can be done and information can be shared.
And a lot of people didn't know about the plagiarism controversy,
and I just assumed because that's part of our algorithms,
and I fed that a lot that most people knew.
We got so many notes from people that had no idea,
and then a lot of the similar vibe to the

(43:00):
caller the voicemail of like I kind of just always
knew something was a little off, but I can quite
put my finger on it, so thank you for now
giving an explanation to like what was not sitting well
with me. I'll read an email that we got, which,
by the way, if you want to call and leave
a voicemail. And I love that she said at the beginning.
I usually never call because I feel weirdly being voicemails.
I think a lot of people feel that way, which

(43:21):
I thought a lot of people would like to call. Yeah,
but that's just we get more emails than voicemails. But
if you feel inclined, eight seven seven two o seven
two oh seven seven is the number, and then you
can email Hey, they're at Feeling Things podcast dot com,
like Beth did. Here's what Beth wrote in Hey Kat

(43:45):
and Amy. I'm a long time listener of Four Things,
like from the very first episode, as in I still
make my bed to this day because of Amy, and
it changed my life for good. I never knew how
to journal, and then I bought the Four Things Journal
because it felt accessible, and it slowly change my life,
as in I now journal a full page almost every day.
The transformation from Kat joining the show as a guest,

(44:06):
to her own podcasts and the Fifth Thing to Feeling
Things has been so cool to watch and cheer on.
It feels like watching two good friends find the very
best versions of themselves.

Speaker 3 (44:15):
I had actually stopped.

Speaker 2 (44:16):
Listening to four things and was only doing the fifth
thing due to time constraints, and the decision to become
feeling things has been such a gift to me, So
thank you, Amy. It's been such a joy and encouragement
of my own journey to watch you learn, grow and
change your mind. And I'm gonna insert myself here and
this is not the email any talking, but and that's
where I feel about Mel, because I did talk about

(44:37):
her so much, and that that was another thing, like
an Instagram dms that I was seeing from people, was
like I only started following Mel because of you, or
I learned about Mel from you, And then I felt like, oh, shoot,
you know it just it's a weird place to be
in when you've hyped someone up and then again that
veil is lifted and then you feel like, now you're

(44:58):
bringing this other information. But then when I got that
line from Beth, that was very encouraging to me because
I am allowed to learn, grow and change my mind
and she put change in all caps. So Beth, thank you.
So much for that specific line, and then she went
on to say some nice things about me blah blah blah,

(45:18):
and then she went on to which thank you Beth
for that words of affirmation or my love language, but
I'm not going to read them for everybody else. And
then she said the Mel Robins episode, thank you for
the Deep Dive. I was introduced to her through you
and initially liked what she.

Speaker 3 (45:32):
Had to say.

Speaker 2 (45:33):
However, recently with the let them stuff, it just didn't
sit right with me. I didn't even know about the
plagiarism part. It went against everything I've been doing in
my healing and therapy journey. And while it wouldn't have
bothered me if you still followed or quoted her firm
believer that we all have different journeys, it did make
me feel connected and seen that you also felt disenfranchised

(45:54):
as well. So I truly appreciate y'all's Deep Dive episode.
It was so refreshingly transparent. Thanks for everything you both
have done for me in ways you'll never know. Hope
you have the day you need to have, Beth Duncan,
so thank you Beth for that, and thank you Kat
for the thoughtful deep dive because that was all you,
and you executed it beautifully, exceeded any expectations I had,

(46:18):
and I think I had a lot of expectations on
how I wanted it to play out, and you killed
it well.

Speaker 3 (46:25):
Thanks. And I was thinking as you were reading that
you changing your mind in this area is brave too.
It's I think there's courage in that to say like, oh,
not that you were wrong, because it's that you learned
more information, but I think you putting yourself in that position,
you could have just been like, no, I love mel Well.

Speaker 2 (46:46):
I still found myself struggling with like saying that I'm
not like exactly. I think there are things I still like.
And again I think I learned more from guests that
she has on now than her. But I did find myself,
even though I was I'm increasingly more just about her,

(47:08):
I still wanted to be like, I mean, it's not
that I'm not a fan, it's just like, this is information,
and do with it what you will, like am I probably?
Am I going to be like? I started to read
her last book and I couldn't finish it. If she
puts out another book, now, it's like the next phase
of my relationship with hers. I'm probably not even gonna
own that book or ask for it as a gift
because I told my sister, oh yeah, I would love it,

(47:28):
so she got it for me. I did see someone
left us a comment on Instagram. They're like, oh, shoot,
what do I do about my let them tattoo that
I got? And I was like, well, people were.

Speaker 3 (47:37):
Getting those tattoos. There was a whole when I was
doing my research. Apparently there was a movement when that
poem came out that people were getting those tattoos.

Speaker 2 (47:47):
Yeah, because so Cassie Phillips had gotten tattoos, Bill wet them.

Speaker 3 (47:50):
Tattoo can And I hope that this was clear. Let
them works in a certain context. It just isn't as
overarching life changing and works in every area of your
life like some of the stuff that has been coming
out lately about it. It has limitations, but it's just
like we talked about any of the other little things

(48:11):
we have, like the weight to worry and all that stuff,
those still can be meaningful to you.

Speaker 2 (48:16):
So I replied to that person and I said just that,
like it wasn't like take the information we shared, but
your tattoo can still be special and be very fitting
in certain cases. But it made me think about our tattoos,
because we want to get some of ours lasered off.
Like I've got joy and a spat and they're bleeding
so bad. Like I want to get on lasered off,
but I have a summer tan, or you can't have

(48:37):
sun on your skin.

Speaker 3 (48:38):
I don't think, oh when you get them, well, I
just don't want to pay for it right now, cause
am I having other things? I'm having one? Do you
say I have a limited you'ring lack? You have a
lack mindset. Maybe if I just start getting my tattoos
lasered off, I'll just be a money magnet and we'll
just come to me.

Speaker 2 (48:54):
You already are like sell a fee things on Facebook
for your tattoo removal.

Speaker 3 (49:00):
Please buy this patio furniture. I'd like to get my
dad tooo removed.

Speaker 2 (49:04):
I mean, that's girl. Math sometimes is like, Okay, what
am I not using right now? What can I offload?
And then boom, well what do I.

Speaker 3 (49:11):
Want more than? What do I want more? This couch
or my arm back?

Speaker 2 (49:18):
Well, it depends, is it like the main couch you
sit on or is it when your mom gave you.
That's sitting in the corner.

Speaker 3 (49:24):
I don't know. I might I could sit on the ground.

Speaker 2 (49:27):
Like I have this rocker chair under my tree in
my backyard.

Speaker 3 (49:30):
It's red.

Speaker 2 (49:31):
I don't know if you've seen it. It's like a glider.

Speaker 3 (49:34):
Yeah. And so do you sell it for you? Well,
I'll take you percent. Listen, Oh is it from your mom?

Speaker 2 (49:39):
It was my mom's.

Speaker 3 (49:40):
Oh, then you can't sell that.

Speaker 2 (49:41):
But well, I was thinking about stuff your mom gave
you and how you're selling.

Speaker 3 (49:45):
It, and oh, I know, wayfair.

Speaker 2 (49:50):
I know this is totally different. I'm just telling you
the thought I had. You know how one thought leads
to another thought.

Speaker 3 (49:55):
You know that. Yeah, I've heard that cyber too.

Speaker 2 (49:58):
Okay, So when you're talking about that, I was like, oh,
thinking about my patio furniture from my mom, which I
don't love the color red, but my mom loved red.
So I've thought for a long long time I need
to paint it. So I really need some sort of
dopamine hit or motivation to get that painted. But also
I was seeing the other day, do I have to
hold onto this like I have some of her jewelry?

(50:20):
That means a lot to me that I wear all
the time. I don't even know that I really like
the glider. I just keep holding on to the dang glider.
It's sitting out underneath the tree facing a fence, like
if you were to sit in it. There's nothing enjoyful
like what you're gliding. And you're like, look at my
neighbor's fence and is it dirty?

Speaker 1 (50:35):
Look?

Speaker 2 (50:35):
Yes, it's dirty. The paint is peeling.

Speaker 3 (50:38):
Okay. But but but you could repurpose that into a
beautiful piece of furniture. There are people that do that.
I watch them on TikTok all the time. They take
like a dresser they found on the side of the
road and they turn it into like this beautiful work
of art. So I think that could be a metaphor

(50:58):
of something refresh in your life. I couldn't be me,
because I would just spray paint it.

Speaker 2 (51:04):
Okay, that's what I was gonna do with spray paint
it like dark brown or not black.

Speaker 3 (51:10):
I think we can find you somebody who can like Okay, Well,
we then we have to sell some things to be
able to pay for the refurbished chair.

Speaker 2 (51:18):
It's okay, I would invest in it if it like
makes my mom's peace special, Like, I'm okay with that.
Circulating money brings me joy. Anytime you divide anything, just
tell yourself that, because when you're paying money to somebody else,
it's like you're giving.

Speaker 3 (51:33):
Your helping them exactly, helping them live the life that they.

Speaker 2 (51:36):
Were, and then that brings you joy. So therefore it's
a it's the whole system.

Speaker 3 (51:41):
Okay, Well, let's find somebody and if you're listening and
you're like, oh, I do that and you'll live in
the area, maybe they can come fix your chair. Yeah, yeah,
don't it. This was Wayfair furniture, not like a family
heirloom ordered it.

Speaker 2 (51:55):
I mean I have pieces. This light in here that
I love is from Wayfair.

Speaker 3 (51:58):
It's baller, I know. I think I might buy it.

Speaker 2 (52:02):
I sent you the Wayfair. I think, yes, it's so cute.
I mean, I don't know the brand of it. My
moms could easily be from Wayfair. I have no idea.
It's not some like precious.

Speaker 3 (52:11):
She isn't used to glide in it, and you would
watch her glide on.

Speaker 2 (52:14):
Her back packet. That means I should sit in it.

Speaker 3 (52:17):
My mom never sat in this. I don't think my
mom ever sat in this French shore. I don't have
like a memory, but there are things that I have.
As we're removing stuff, I kept being like, oh, I
have a box of rolled coins in a shoe box,
duct taped. It's so heavy. There's like two hundred dollars
of rolled coins in this box. I will never cash

(52:37):
it in because I found it in the closet of
my grandfather's house when we were cleaning their house out
after my grandma died. He had passed away before her,
and we have memories of rolling coins with our grandfather
when we were little, and so I took all of
the rolled coins and I divide them out between four
because I have three siblings, and which that was the

(52:59):
hill of money in his closet, because what is that
six hundred dollars And I will never we are moving it.
Patrick's like what is this? And I'm like, We're never
taking that to the bank. I will have that until
the day I die because it is a memory, you know.

Speaker 2 (53:14):
Yeah, there's to that.

Speaker 3 (53:16):
If I just found rolled coins in my parents' kitchen,
I'd take them to the bank. I don't have a
memory with that, but.

Speaker 2 (53:22):
Make your grandkids are for sure cashing that in.

Speaker 3 (53:24):
No, do not take this to the bank. This is
a memory of your great great grandfather, your great grandfather.

Speaker 2 (53:34):
I was featuring Stashia finding that, and she'd be like.

Speaker 3 (53:36):
Yes, grandfather's grandfather.

Speaker 2 (53:40):
Feet don't fail me now, she'd catch that stuff in
so fast. Okay, well.

Speaker 3 (53:48):
That's that.

Speaker 2 (53:48):
This is our episode. There's a lot of feelings in
this episode. We have feelings of we were in awe,
we felt accomplished, we feel sentimental, yeah, proud, feel confused
by hormones and weird cries, and I feel pain in
my elbow. Lots of feelings and we hope that you
enjoyed the mail Robins Deep Dive and appreciate it again.

(54:11):
I'll say one more time, Cat, you did an excellent job.
We have requests for more deep dives, so we got
to figure out who if y'all would like to send
in your request. We've already gotten some, but you could
send in people you would like them on and we
can work on that.

Speaker 3 (54:23):
Things can be things on a cult or some kind
of trend or something like that golfer's elbow. Ye deep,
I know that anybody would listen to that, but maybe
we could make it fun.

Speaker 2 (54:36):
I mean A deep dive on perimenopause would be so helpful,
but I feel like we would need an expert. Yeah,
for sure, not that's beyond our scope. And speaking of
our ADHD showed up a lot in this episode too,
so I know that a deep dive on that would
be appreciated, but from an expert. So some of our
deep dives maybe from us, or we'd have to bring
in experts, but we're open to anything. So yes, send

(54:58):
in whatever topic she would like looked into with the microscope. Yeah,
and uh yeah, we hope you have it.

Speaker 1 (55:06):
We have, you have, I have.

Speaker 3 (55:07):
We are having the day you need to have.

Speaker 5 (55:11):
Bye.

Speaker 1 (55:12):
Bye