September 2, 2025 • 35 mins
The Feeling of the Day is regret... Amy and Kat are both feeling it. Kat is second-guessing her new haircut, while Amy regrets “crashing out” on her son for eating an entire bowl of pineapple (and reminding him he really needs to diversify his fruit). In the middle of their remorse, Kat tosses out the question: What’s something you’d still do if you were only 60% good at it? They also respond to a listener's email asking what the point of the new podcast even is, and share another wild story from a listener about getting hit on at the grocery store (sent in after Amy’s own infamous “business card guy” moment). Plus, TV recs (Righteous Gemstones and Woman of the Hour), details on how to join them at Top Golf for a foster care fundraiser, and of course a reminder to have the day you need to have!
Click HERE for details on the Top Golf fundraiser Amy is hosting with Ben for foster kids in Nashville.
Watch us on Youtube HERE!
Call and leave a voicemail: 877-207-2077
Email: heythere@feelingthingspodcast.com
HOSTS:
Amy Brown // RadioAmy.com // @RadioAmy
Kat Van Buren // threecordstherapy.com // @KatVanburen
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
All right, break it down. If you ever have feelings
that you just false home Amy and Cat, gotcha, Cob
and locking m Brother, ladies and folks, do you just
follow Anna spirit where it's all the front and real stuff,
tell the chill stuff and the him but Swayne, Sometimes
the best thing you can do it just stop you
(00:25):
feel things. This is feeling things.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
With Amy and Cat. Happy Tuesday.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
Welcome to feeling things. I'm Amy and I'm Cat and
our feeling of the day is coming from you Cat,
which you guy.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
I'm feeling a regretful.
Speaker 4 (00:39):
I didn't really want to say that word because I
don't want to be feeling this, but it's that's part
of feeling your feelings.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
It's like they are what they are. What did you do?
Speaker 4 (00:48):
So a couple of days ago I got real, well,
probably a week ago I got you.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
Don't have to give you the long version of this story.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
Like what I'm like, Okay, this is we're setting this
up for like you did something crazy because like I'm like,
I regret too, and I know what you're regretting, and
I'm like, okay, you're regretting this, and like I'm regretting
yelling at my kid.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
Because he ate all the pineapple.
Speaker 4 (01:12):
So okay, I need to process that before I process myself.
Speaker 3 (01:16):
I already asked for forgiveness. Okay, I didn't like yell yell,
but no, I didn't minds the feeling of the day.
But once she said I didn't know exactly what your
feeling was gonna be, but I knew it was going
to be about your hair.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
I'm sat in the state. Oh sorry, I set this stup. Well,
they don't know what Okay, so wait a second.
Speaker 4 (01:34):
I could say this because I'll forget one thing that
does kind of get my tails all twisted.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
I was trying to think of afraid. What's another thing
you say?
Speaker 4 (01:45):
Yuck my yeah, okay, that's a phrase people say.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
That Hey good, sure they do. I've never heard anybody
but you say it.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
We also got an email I don't know if we
read it where a mom said it and her daughter
was like, Mom, don't ever say that again.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
I'm sorry. Yeah, because it's definitely not like what all
the cool kids are saying. I'm not claiming to be cool,
like you know how we say fire, sick or whatever.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
A big one right now is I'm about to crash out,
which is I'm about to lose it, and I feel
like your hair is causing me to crash out.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
I am crashing out.
Speaker 4 (02:21):
Okay, I have to read this because speaking of cool things,
I got a text last night from a friend of
mine and she said, we just had a waiter describe
a dish to us as the missionary sex of chicken dishes.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
So it's just like, you know, playing plan.
Speaker 4 (02:42):
But then I said where, I won't say where, and
she said, he actually said, usually the half chicken is busting',
but this version is the missionary sex of chicken. And
I said, did you end up getting it? And she said,
we did not get it. We're not going to be
the boring couple because they are a kind of like
(03:03):
a cool couple out on a day, say, like kids
and they're going out, but like how And I was like, ool,
that's so funny. I wish that kid was my waiter.
And she was like, he was like thirty five.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
I don't think.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
I don't think I would want a kid waiter talking
to me about missionary and sex.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Okay, well I think it's better than he was thirty five.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
I don't want a teenager being like this. One's like
the missionary's yes, but also like funny not selling the dish, Well, no,
not at all.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
Where were we Well, you're crashing out. I'm crashing out.
But I have to say this too before I crash out.
Speaker 4 (03:38):
One of the things that twists my ties when I
say it, gets my ties all twisted.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
And yuktu're young, yeah, is when you.
Speaker 4 (03:44):
Have something that you're looking forward to eating and it's
in the fridge and you're like, oh, it's like leftovers.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
You're like, I'm.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
Gonna go have the leftover Chinese food or pizza or whatever,
and you open the door and it's gone.
Speaker 3 (03:59):
So you understand I crashed out with the pineapple.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
When you were looking forward to food.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
It was a full thing of pineapple, like full in hand.
Speaker 4 (04:07):
If you're like, oh, that juicy pineapples and the fridge
waiting for me, I can't wait to just go eat it.
Speaker 2 (04:11):
And then you're like, oh, I get it.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
So I came from school in cross country, so I
get he was hot and tired and probably thirsty and
pineapples juicy and hydrating and like yum, and he ate
the entire cut up thing to where I'm like, now
now there's no more.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
Now there's no I don't get doesn't get any pineapple.
Speaker 3 (04:37):
I don't get any pineapples to shear when I'd probably
pack that in her lunch tour like I started, I
started bringing in.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
To share it. It's true she did to your sister.
Speaker 3 (04:50):
She had been packing it in her lunch and now
it's gone. And the thing is there's oranges, apples, bananas
and stores pretty QUI.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Yeah, but I said.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
I looked at him and I said, Hoever I was
crashing out. I said, we need to learn to diversify.
Speaker 5 (05:12):
Because then it won't just you know, oh does it
bear her in one sitting? You know, like you can't
just like ever take a thingful of everything.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
You need it all when you.
Speaker 3 (05:25):
Share ols with people because you're never gonna have roommates
when you go to college. Yes, because I'm like, you
need like, look, you could have gotten a little bit
of pineapple, and you could have gotten an apple and
then eating a banana and then gotten all these different nudes.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
What was he like, Mom, are you okay? You just
looked at me and he was like okay. Like it's
like he's like, I thought you wanted us to eat.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
Fruit, and like I do want them to eat fruit,
and yes, I can go get another pineapple.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
I'm not saying what I did.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
Was okay, But as the kids say, I just crashed
out a little bit and I did have regret and
I did tell sorry, and I said eat the fruit.
I want you to eat the fruit. I said, However,
there is something too diversifying the fruit, like I really
meant that part, like, don't just like because they can
get fixated on like they just go and they need
a variety. And then also that keeps me from having
(06:15):
to go back to the grocery store. I want to
go once a week, do you know what? And teenage
boys they eat a lot, and so diversify the fruit
because then that keeps everybody happy. Now get to the
regret on your hair.
Speaker 4 (06:30):
I'm just thinking of Stevenson in therapy, like at thirty
five years old, being like, one time, diversify the fruit,
and now I can't eat a whole apple anymore.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
No, you can eat a whole apple.
Speaker 3 (06:42):
It'd be like if he opened up the door and
ate all the apples, okay, or all the oranges because
he ate all the pineapple.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
Okay, that's funny.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
Yeah, great, sorry mom, Okay, what's happening with the hair?
Speaker 4 (06:56):
Okay, so back to about a week ago. I got
so I told you this. I was like, I want
to shave my head because my hair. I was just
having those over stimulated moments where like my hair was
so long. It was like it didn't really do anything
because it was so long in all the same length
and like you know when your hair gets so long,
it's caught in your armpit and stuff, you know, itching, Yes.
Speaker 2 (07:19):
Because I had these flyaways.
Speaker 4 (07:21):
I don't know how, but I got like a chunk
of hair cut in the front of my head. You
can't see this anybody that's listening, but there was a
small probably thirty strands of hair got like cut like that.
I don't know how, so they would like tickle my forehead.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
Which I know you just said you can't see this.
So I wanted to remind people we are on YouTube except
for not this episode. We're not filming today, just circumstances
because of all I'm talking about right now, Cat didn't
want a film because of her hair. Just kidding, just kidding.
We don't have our whole crew here, so it just
got nice. So you know, I know that some of
you that do watch us on YouTube. You might be like,
(07:58):
wait a second, what happened?
Speaker 2 (07:59):
But if you haven't.
Speaker 3 (08:00):
Subscribed over on YouTube, you can because we are growing
over there, which is so fun to see because most
of our loyal people listen via podcast when they're out
and about. But YouTube, shut up, plug okay, keep going.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Hair Okay, So my hair was like tickling me. So
that's what I was. I felt was like there's like
bugs crawling on my head. That's what it felt like.
But I think it was just like over stimulation.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
And if I think about it, I had a lot
going on, so I probably was just overwhelmed and I
was taking it out on my hair.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Anyway.
Speaker 4 (08:29):
I got it cut and I probably got four inches
cut off, which.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
Is a lot.
Speaker 4 (08:34):
Yeah, that's a lot, and I feel like I have
a bowl cut.
Speaker 2 (08:40):
But it's still past your shoulders. A bowl cut is
way like.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
I know that it's your hair, so you're feeling it,
but I'm telling you as an onlooker, it looks good.
But I know that you've been also just trying to
like take matters into your own hands now, and I mean,
you just need to let it go.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I did cut a couple things myself keep cutting it
or maybe this is deeper because it's like too much
change and not enough change at the same time. I
don't know.
Speaker 4 (09:06):
I haven't processed it, which means I probably shouldn't be
talking about it right now. But all that to say,
I wish I could take two inches back on my hair.
Speaker 3 (09:16):
So in a couple of months, two inches will grow
and that that's when it will be.
Speaker 4 (09:20):
But what I am doing is I stopped getting it colored.
And this all goes back to if you guys listen
to the Hot Girl Hamster Wheel episode where I'm like,
why am I coloring my hair? My hair is actually
not to toot my own horn. But I have a
pretty natural hair color.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
Yeah, I think it's really pretty, like a really pretty brunette, and.
Speaker 4 (09:39):
It looks good with my skin tone. So why have
I been putting blonde highlights in it. It's just like
I got into this routine of doing it, and so
I didn't do that. So I do feel really good
about that, and I actually do really like the color.
Speaker 3 (09:49):
Well, so you want to know about cutting the four
inches off though, that helps like get go out of
that color off. So this is you just having more
of your fresh hair.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Also, don't know how to do my hair. That's another thing.
Speaker 4 (10:03):
I just don't know how to do my hair at
this length anymore because it was long for so long
that how I curled it before it doesn't work.
Speaker 3 (10:09):
Now I'm like trying to figure out the metaphor for
life here, Like how oh.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
You keep thinking? I'll keep talking you think about a metaphor?
Speaker 4 (10:16):
She asked me if I wanted her to do the
wave like I usually do, or for her to do
the blowout look? And I said, what's the blowout look?
And she said, oh, everybody's doing the blowout look? Now,
why don't we try it? And she did it and
I actually really liked it. And then I did it
myself today and I was like, you look like a
second grader and you tried to curl your own hair.
I think I just need to practice.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
Is that the metaphor that I need to When you've
start something new, be patient, hit on it until you practice.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
You're a beginner. I'm a beginner.
Speaker 4 (10:47):
Allow you're reaching so far, but I'm going to help
you out. You're allowed to be a beginner with things
that you've never done before.
Speaker 3 (10:57):
Yeah, that's true. Like I talk about this aff styled
hair this length.
Speaker 4 (11:01):
Well, I have it, just like in times with different
hairstyles were cool because I used to always have a
top knot. I would cut my hair short and just
put it on top knot, and that was like my thing.
Speaker 3 (11:10):
So why don't you just do that?
Speaker 2 (11:12):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (11:12):
I felt like I outgrew the topknot. Maybe next week
I'll be wearing a topknot if I do, just don't say.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Anything that top not like the missionary style hairstyles or
is it bustin'.
Speaker 2 (11:23):
I guess we'll have to see.
Speaker 4 (11:26):
But I have to say this now because you reminded
me of it. How a lot of adults have troubled
starting new things and trying new things because when we're adults,
we feel like we have to be automatically good at something.
But as kids, if you look back on the things
that I played soccer, I was on the year around
swim team even though I couldn't dive. I did gymnastics, dance,
(11:47):
acting classes. I tried everything and did not think twice
about it because I was young and I felt like
I was allowed to be a beginner and learn. But
as adults, we for some reason get embarrass or feels
shame when we're not automatically good at something. And so
I asked my clients a lot who are in this space,
(12:07):
what's something you would do if you only had to
be like sixty percent good at it? And maybe for
me that answer is I would curl my hair a
new way.
Speaker 3 (12:17):
Or maybe it's like you don't have to be good
at it's just like what would you do if you
had if there wasn't this.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Fear attached to it?
Speaker 3 (12:23):
Because that reminds me of this email I'm about to
read and like us relaunching the podcast together, because I
think for me, I had some fear around that. I
had excitement because I knew relaunching it with you was
going to be amazing, but also like I had had
four things for so many years and had built that,
and you had you Need Therapy podcast and we were
going to be emerging something, and like what if it
(12:44):
didn't work and then our friendship blew up crashed out
because you made all want pineapple or something.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
I will never don't worry? Well, yeah, because that yacku're
youm too? Yeah, you don't want people to eat all.
Speaker 3 (12:57):
The food you're looking forward to in the fridge so
we got an email from a confused listener. In fact,
that's the subject line. So we got an email from
(13:18):
a confused listener. In fact, that's the subject line. In
regards to our rebrand, our shift into Feeling Things, which
we started discussing privately between the two of us back
in August, should we rebrand the podcast and you come
on full time? And then it took from August that
initial conversation all the way to April. April first is
(13:40):
when we went live with the rebrand, so that was
eight months, and I would say the first few months
after August were like, Okay, should we really do this?
And I remember having fear around it, and then it's
a lot of work. So it's almost like also, sometimes
what would you do, like if you didn't have to
think of it out the work you would have to
(14:01):
put into it, because sometimes we put things off because
the well, but we had to do it upfront and
the now that we're on the other side of it
totally worth it. Maybe because we do have this listener,
this listener email, do youar Feeling Things podcast? I'm a
longtime listener and fan of Four Things with Amy Brown
and enjoyed the episodes with Kat. I only listen to
podcasts during my evening walks with my dog, and four
(14:23):
Things is in my go to pick. For years, I've
been listening to the new Feeling Things podcast and I'm
having a hard time understanding the structure and the overall
goal each episode. I feel confused and I have no
idea the point of each episode. I want to keep listening, However,
I find myself waiting for the overall purpose. Can you
all explain the structure? I do get that you all
(14:44):
pick a feeling word at the beginning of an episode,
but after that it seems to go many unknown directions.
Thanks four Things listener. So okay, I get that. Yeah,
because sometimes I feel confused too, and I think what
for me has been beautiful about this process is stepping
(15:06):
into the unknown and the scary at times and not
really knowing. And one thing Kat and I wanted was
to discuss feelings, which I think in every single episode
we do that like a variety of different feelings. It
may not look, you know, super quote unquote structured, like oh,
we're moving on to this next feeling, but we share
(15:27):
a lot from our lives or stories or things that
we're watching feelings that we're having about everything from a
TV show to a book to something that happened to
us out in the wild. You know, Like recently I
talked about a guy hitting on me when I was
with my kids, and we've got an email coming up
from another listener that's a story sort of similar that
(15:48):
happened to her in the wild, which the story is
blowing my mind now that I think about it, like
they took guts for this guy.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
To do what he did.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
But we'll get to that email in a minute. But
also speaking of these emails we're getting, another thing is
the feeling of connection and the connection with y'all. So
this email we're going to read coming up as from
a listener that has interacted with us multiple times, and
we don't know her, but we feel like we know her.
And while not a lot of us have met in person,
(16:18):
some of us maybe have in the past at for things,
live events or something. But our hope is that you
have a feeling of connection and you feel like you're
listening to your friend's talk, and so that is our vibe,
that is our energy, that is our structure. Now we
will have the occasional deep dive which Kat delivered our
(16:39):
first one ever about mel Robbins and the let Them
theory beautifully done.
Speaker 2 (16:43):
Kat.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
People are raving about it or they're feeling having feelings
about it. They're having feelings, like lots of feelings about it.
And with that, I'll say we are going to continue
to do more deep dives, but we also want to
be clear that deep dives are not always going to
be about people. They might be about topics or cults
or ideas, idea other things. We're open to requests, so
(17:06):
y'all can email us things you would like for us
to deep dive on. Hey, they're at feeling things. Podcasts
dot com.
Speaker 4 (17:13):
Could even be like a trend like, yes, deep dive
on La booboos, Yeah my.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
Death those are yes, I know what they are, but
I wouldn't be interested in that.
Speaker 4 (17:20):
Which I'm just saying like a trend that I want
to be super interested in, although I I am a
little confused by it that I'm intrigued, not intrigued like
I want to buy one.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
Yeah, if y'all don't know what laboobos are, they're like
these little stuffed animals that clip on bags and they're
they look like monsters so expensive they look like monsters.
Speaker 4 (17:37):
Yeah, but my point in saying that is it could
be like some kind of trend that's happening or has
happened in the past.
Speaker 3 (17:43):
Oh that like we don't get Maybe I would be
into that because it would help me understand, Yeah, help
me understand why people are adults are putting these.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
If firebags just happened, we could do a deep dive
on firefest, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
Yeah, like things that happen in pop culture.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
There will be you know, but the point I think
off shoots like that, and then there's also going to
be series like We've got The Four Horsemen coming up,
which I want you to touch on. Again, Cat's a
therapist and this is a mental health minded podcast, I
think is how we branded it so it can lean
therapy at times. And also again we really our main
(18:22):
goal is Cat and I chatting, and you all feel
like you're sitting with your girlfriends and you're having a
talk or hey, guys, you're here too, girlfriends, boyfriends.
Speaker 4 (18:32):
Well, also I'll say, like, just like you're talking with
your friends, Like sometimes those conversations are lighthearted and fun
and silly and random, and sometimes those conversations are more
vulnerable and deep, and they're about your friend telling you
something that they learned or telling you something that is
interesting to them. And that's what the structure is. Is
that the structure is that we have a certain idea
(18:53):
of how we interact with each other, and we allow
whatever is showing up within our friendship in our lives
to come here.
Speaker 2 (18:59):
So when we are sharing something with you, like the.
Speaker 4 (19:02):
Mel Robins saying, or the Four Horsemen, it's because those
things have been of value to us or are interesting
to us, or we've been talking about them or learning
about them. So it is I think the connection piece
is huge too in that well. But yeah, and the
four Horsemen. If you're like, what is that? It is
John Gotman, who is a very famous relationship marriage therapists.
(19:27):
I don't know if he's a psychologist and researcher. Yeah,
he's done more research on couples. I mean, he's if
you want to go to if you want to be
a couple's therapists, you often are doing the Gotman training.
I have not done that. I am not a couple's therapists. However,
his research found these four things that he uses to
determine with ninety percent accuracy, which is insane, sane if
(19:52):
a relationship will survive or end, and we're going to
split because there's so much we can say about them,
going to split those up into four episodes, either.
Speaker 2 (20:02):
Two or four. I think four. Okay, we'll see.
Speaker 4 (20:05):
How wait we always are like, we'll do both of
those in the same episode, and then the episode's five
hours long, right, No.
Speaker 3 (20:10):
I think that we make it one horseman per episode
because we may go on tantangents. You never know, we
may end up talking about dryer balls.
Speaker 4 (20:19):
Which is that's the structure and that's fun, where like
we're not so regimented. And I'll say, for myself, I
have to have a couple different podcasts that are in
my rotation personally, because I like the podcast that is
just random and fun and like so just out there,
and then I like the podcasts that you learn from,
and then I like the podcasts that are more structured.
(20:41):
But I have to have a variety because I can't
just do one of those. So we're bringing you all
those things into one damn kind of So be looking
forward to the four Horsemen. And again, if you do
have something you're like I want to learn about this
or my friends have been talking about this, let us know, Hey.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
Does that?
Speaker 3 (21:02):
Yeah, and make sure you're following on Instagram at Feeling
Things podcast and TikTok, because.
Speaker 2 (21:10):
We're gonna do something like if you live.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
Close to Nashville and the Nashville area coming up at
the end of September, we've got an event. We're picking
people to come to Top Golf with us for a
charity for Foster Care, and like we're gonna have a
Feeling Things team and y'all are going to be our
guest so it's fun, but those that's how we can
interact and give those slots away, So make sure you're
following over there and we'll be doing that sort of soon,
(21:35):
so that way in case people need to plan obviously
their calendars and even come, Like I know some people
were saying, oh, I would I live only a couple
hours away, so I would drive, So I know some
people need to plan. But community and connection, I think
those two words are big for both of us. So
we're looking forward to that event so that we can
connect with y'all in person, but without the in person stuff,
(21:57):
which hopefully we'll plan more of that in the future,
saying that for the last few years, we haven't done
it live in a while. But also life has gotten
crazy at times. I think that happens to everybody where
you have something on your agenda for the year and
then you take a look at it later and you're like,
this doesn't really make sense for me to put all
this work into this right now when I have this
(22:17):
happening in life. So I know, with Kat and I
even making this switch, that we have a little bit
more flexibility than we had before because now we have it.
We're a team and we have a bigger team helping us.
But also one of our goals is to do more
in person things, So that's part of our plan and
we want y'all to know that because so many of
you have reached out, when is the next live or
(22:38):
I would love to plan for it because I am
I'd fly there, which is so cool to think about,
and we want that for y'all. So just know we're
going to be working on something because we love that
stuff too. So thank you for the email. And being
confused is good because then you get to ask a question,
and then you get information, and then you get to
(22:58):
decide for yourself if this is something that you want
to keep listening to, and we certainly hope that you do.
We love having each and every one of you here,
especially our girl Karen, who has emailed and if you know,
you know. But here's what Karen sent us after hearing
a recent episode where I shared that a guy like
gave me his business card while I was with my kids.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
Which someone said.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
I don't know if it was after they emailed or
texted or I mean DMed or said it to one
of us later, but like, the more shocking part was
that he had a business card.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
Why is that shocking a lot of people.
Speaker 3 (23:33):
Don't carry business cards anymore, do they?
Speaker 4 (23:35):
You know what? It is shocking because I have business
cards and I never have one when I need it.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Well, maybe you should start carrying around. I shouldn't start
carrying them around.
Speaker 6 (23:43):
Or here's what Karen wrote, right, here's what Karen wrote.
Speaker 3 (23:57):
Hey, Amy and Kat, thank you for making me laugh
out loud today. While I was listening to Tuesday's episode,
I was gardening, so the neighbors probably thought I was crazy.
When I lived in Montana a gazillion years ago, I
was in line at the grocery store and heard the
little girl behind me say to her dad, this thing
smells like armpits.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
I turned around to see what she was talking about.
It was a.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
Plexiglass divider thing, and I laughed. I turned back around
and proceeded to start writing out my check to pay
for my groceries. Two nights later, I got a call
from a guy. It was the dad, and he wanted
to take me on a date. I must have sounded
very confused because he said, I watched you write your
phone number on your check. I was twenty five ish
(24:40):
and dumb, so I said yes. But I told my
best friend and she insisted on coming with me on
the date, mainly because he was a taxidermist and she
had concerns.
Speaker 2 (24:49):
Lol. Thankfully he was cool.
Speaker 3 (24:51):
With that nice guy, but I was in my bar
girl era, so dating a single dad was not in
alignment with my goals. Every time I remember it, though,
I do you have to give him props for shooting
his shot, your friend, Karen. I mean, I am blown
away that he creeped on her writing her phone number
down and either memorized it or wrote it down himself,
(25:14):
because I mean, he didn't have a cell phone back then.
Like he couldn't like dial it right away, so he
had to like get that number, and he held it
for two days and then he called her.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
I am trying to think of the right feeling.
Speaker 4 (25:28):
I want to say shocked, but I'm more like in
awe in alle feels too positive.
Speaker 2 (25:34):
I'm shocked that she went or that he did that
in multiple.
Speaker 4 (25:38):
Ways, that he was first of all, close enough and
had good enough eyesight, Because I have to be pretty
close to somebody to be able to see them writing
something like that down.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Well, yeah, your eyesight is terrible. Stop attacking me. Oh sorry, sorry,
I'm just kidding.
Speaker 4 (26:00):
Regardless, you have to be pretty close to see somebody
writing their phone number on a check. Also, you have
to be staring like he is staring. That is bold,
and I am impressed by him. It sounds like he
just really wanted to take this person on a date
and maybe didn't want to ask in front of his child.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (26:16):
But what also, as I'm saying this, is that how
it happened back then, Because that's wild that you would
just see somebody at the grocery store and be like, oh,
she's about to write a check. Oh they write first
of all, she's writing a check at the grocery store.
I don't think they even take checks anymore. That he's like, oh,
she's about to write a check. I bet she's gonna
write a phone down and they have to stare at it.
(26:38):
That's how you did it.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
Yeah. I Meanwhile, I met my husband on a dating map. Yeah,
he wiped.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
Yeah, things have changed, but I mean someone could still
do that now if they overhear you say your phone
number or something. But I would be like, oh my gosh,
that's kind of creepy.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
But would you think it's creepy if it was back then?
Speaker 3 (26:56):
I don't think the time matters. I think when someone
does something bold like that, if you're attracted them, or
think if there's an attraction, then it's acceptable. If you're not,
then you're like they're a soccer weirdo.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (27:07):
I agree, But I do think the extra element of
it being back then that was probably more normalized than
it is now. People don't even go up to you
in person half the time to ask you out. They'll
just like go on a dating app.
Speaker 3 (27:17):
So yeah, I feel like some of that is kind
of coming back, though people are missing the.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Same shit had it happened twice to you. Twice.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
No, I like, oh, well he found me through someone else.
That's the same thing.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
I mean, that's pretty. He also came up and said
hi to you. Oh yeah, that's right. Yeah you did.
Men coming up to you're left and right must be nice.
You're like, oh, I mean, it's coming back. It's happened
to me six times in the past week now whatever.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
My current boyfriend did it to me at the grocery store,
which okay, fine, and then I did Yeah, I had
the business card guy the other day. That's not six times,
I know, but like, oh, this is making me think
of that show though, well, just going on dates with
people and then that guy being a taxidermist, you know,
because being scared he might murder you. That show it's
(28:10):
been on Netflix. It's a movie for at least maybe
a year or two with Anna Kendrick, Woman of the Hour,
where it's based on a true story from back in
the day where this woman went on a game show
and she was matched with a serial killer because a
serial killer went on as one of the contestants. Like
the girl was getting matched with guys and I tried
to start watching it the other night and I had
(28:31):
to turn it off because it was so disturbing and
I can't believe that this is real life and it
actually happened.
Speaker 2 (28:39):
But I've never heard of that. You got to be
careful out there are people. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (28:43):
In one of his tactics, of course, he had the
game show thing, which I never even made it to
the part where I saw him on the show, but
leading up to it, they show how he starts.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
Since this very beginning. So I'm not getting anything away
in case you've been.
Speaker 3 (28:56):
Looking forward to watching this on Netflix, but it has
been up there a while and this is a real story,
so maybe you even know what happened. But he's like
the nicest guy, and he would take pictures as a
photographer of women and it make them feel special. Like
one girl, I guess he was like, Hey, let's go
to this beautiful forest, like a desert, like it was
(29:16):
in the desert in the middle of nowhere, right, but
beautiful scenery. And now you're out in the middle of
nowhere with this man has a camera, but you think
he's a photographer and he's taking your photos and he
seems gentle and kind and nice and encouraging and like,
you know, like making you feel good in front of
the camera and then next thing, you know, So that
was his thing, and so kind of like he looked
like this nice photographer guy. They'd be like, hey, oh,
(29:38):
hold that smile. Oh you look like you're so cute
right there. Hold it, hold it, hold it.
Speaker 2 (29:42):
And then you you kind of let your guard down.
Speaker 3 (29:44):
You're like, oh, and then he kills you. Yeah, yes,
that was his thing. I don't know how many women,
but it's called Woman of the Hour. So go watch
that if you want to. And if he wants something
lighter but also vulgar, then you can check out Righteous
Jumpstones on HBO Max.
Speaker 2 (30:00):
I've been talking about that, which.
Speaker 3 (30:01):
Kadenary Christians definitely don't watch it with like your grandparent
type Christians. I don't know that my parents would have.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
My parents watched it.
Speaker 3 (30:09):
Oh, they okay, and they love it.
Speaker 2 (30:11):
They think it's funny. But I did. I don't know
if they've seen the last season.
Speaker 4 (30:14):
And I did tell I warned them because they thought
it was hilarious and said, if you watch the fourth season,
just know.
Speaker 2 (30:19):
They take it a little too far. It just gets weird. Yeah,
it's a little too weird, real.
Speaker 3 (30:23):
Weird, like there's some stuff Where'm like, Okay, could have
done without seeing that, Like I don't need to see that.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
You don't have to say it that way. It's like that,
keep making it more ridiculous.
Speaker 3 (30:31):
Yeah, they're making fun of meg megachurches and megachurch pastors
and families and so somebody.
Speaker 2 (30:38):
It's kind of spot on.
Speaker 3 (30:39):
It's like four seasons and I started watching it years
ago on and off, and then I was under the
weather recently, I guess, like a week or two ago,
and I had a lot of free time, and I
watched all of it, like season three, season four, and
I'm all the way.
Speaker 2 (30:54):
Colt are the one that got me to watch it
in the first place, oh, way back in the day.
Speaker 3 (30:57):
Yeah, okay, I'm such a huthan.
Speaker 2 (31:01):
So anyway, check that out.
Speaker 3 (31:02):
On a lighter note, because Woman of the Hour is
definitely heavy.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
I have a question.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
Not to change the subject, no, fine, I'd rather stop
talking about Well.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
I'm bringing it back to the email which from Karen. Yes,
we laughed out loud when we read this email. It
really entertained me. Would you or have you ever gone
on a date with.
Speaker 4 (31:23):
A friend like they're going on a date and you
just are like, I'm gonna come with you because I
don't for whatever reason.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
Have you ever been the third wheel on like a
first date, on a first date? No, I have had people.
Speaker 3 (31:37):
At my house for my first date when I'm getting
picked up, like okay, my friends.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
Like be here, but not go on the date, but
like be here for the pick up. Also, I wonder
if it's different. Now, that's a good idea.
Speaker 4 (31:48):
It's also wait a second, Well, I guess you're dating
people that you know through somebody, because if you're just
letting a stranger pick you up on a first date,
that's wild.
Speaker 3 (31:57):
Well I did let my current boyfriend pick me up
at my house for the first date because we have
mutual friends. Yeah, that's the only reason.
Speaker 4 (32:04):
Oh my gosh, so your first interaction with him is
like a thirty minute car ride.
Speaker 3 (32:09):
Yeah, well, I mean he picked me up, came to
my door, came in and met me, met cry okat
was here?
Speaker 2 (32:13):
Were you so nervous? I don't remember this, but then
I do it.
Speaker 3 (32:17):
I think I was a little nervous. But remember I
was just coming off of the whole lunch with Leslie debacle,
oh with the other guy. So I was like, yeah,
I was in. My therapist was like, you need to
adult date. So I'm like, he look here, I am.
I'm out here adult dating. Look at me in a
thirty minute car ride to a restaurant. Plus, I was
really excited about the restaurant we were going to because
I hadn't been there yet and I'd wanted to go,
(32:37):
so was worth a thirty minute drive. And he wasn't
that awkward And I thought it was his car. I
didn't know the car we were in. Come to find
out later though, is his dead wife's car.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
He didn't even bring his car.
Speaker 3 (32:50):
I'm like, oh, so this is your wife's car that
passed away. I shouldn't have stood it that.
Speaker 2 (32:54):
Way, dead wife's car, but like that's in my brain.
Speaker 3 (32:56):
I'm like, wait, this is your This isn't even your car,
Like you're driving the car that she drove.
Speaker 2 (33:02):
I wonder if I've wanted her with him to support
I think this is far away gets a better gas mileage.
Oh it's not that deep.
Speaker 4 (33:11):
Well, I was gonna say, I wonder if now, because
because we can share locations with people on our phone,
people don't feel the need to like go on the
date like back then. I don't know how many years
ago this was, but back then, like oh well when there.
Speaker 3 (33:23):
Was an hour, no Karen's oh Karen, this was twenty
five years ago, so.
Speaker 4 (33:27):
Okay, So like you couldn't know where your friend was
if they were going on a date with a stranger.
Speaker 2 (33:31):
So you're like, I'll go with you.
Speaker 4 (33:33):
But now it's just would you share your location with
me so I can just know if you're a kid? Exactly, Yes,
So it's not that right now that would be a
little bit more weird because we don't have to do that,
But back then it was probably actually like pretty smart.
Speaker 3 (33:44):
Yeah, you're gonna go out with some random guy that's
calling you from the grocery store that stalked your number. Yes,
that's a good friend. I hope you're still friends with
that person. But if you're not, we we sect that
because things things happen, and Kat and I hope to
be friends for a long time now. Yeah, but working
together has its challenges. However, we do love our sib
(34:06):
don't take that personally. It's just when you work closely
with somebody. Yeah, right, when I said that, you but
I don't mean that, I just mean I think we
have good systems in play.
Speaker 2 (34:15):
Yeah, I was kind of joking. I don't want you
to secure. Good.
Speaker 3 (34:20):
Well, we love that you're here, even if you're confused
or you're totally clear on what's happening, confused or clear.
We're here for the connection and community.
Speaker 2 (34:33):
C C c CC clear, confused, connection and community. That's us.
Come as you are.
Speaker 3 (34:40):
Yeah, listen, okay, follow us on Instagram, TikTok, Feeling Things podcast.
Like I said, YouTube, mean where every guys work.
Speaker 2 (34:48):
We're everywhere. You can't escape us.
Speaker 3 (34:51):
Yeah all right, Well, we hope you're having the day
the day you need to have.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
How hard on that b
All right, break it down. If you ever have feelings
that you just false home Amy and Cat, gotcha, Cob
and locking m Brother, ladies and folks, do you just
follow Anna spirit where it's all the front and real stuff,
tell the chill stuff and the him but Swayne, Sometimes
the best thing you can do it just stop you
(00:25):
feel things. This is feeling things.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
With Amy and Cat. Happy Tuesday.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
Welcome to feeling things. I'm Amy and I'm Cat and
our feeling of the day is coming from you Cat,
which you guy.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
I'm feeling a regretful.
Speaker 4 (00:39):
I didn't really want to say that word because I
don't want to be feeling this, but it's that's part
of feeling your feelings.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
It's like they are what they are. What did you do?
Speaker 4 (00:48):
So a couple of days ago I got real, well,
probably a week ago I got you.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
Don't have to give you the long version of this story.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
Like what I'm like, Okay, this is we're setting this
up for like you did something crazy because like I'm like,
I regret too, and I know what you're regretting, and
I'm like, okay, you're regretting this, and like I'm regretting
yelling at my kid.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
Because he ate all the pineapple.
Speaker 4 (01:12):
So okay, I need to process that before I process myself.
Speaker 3 (01:16):
I already asked for forgiveness. Okay, I didn't like yell yell,
but no, I didn't minds the feeling of the day.
But once she said I didn't know exactly what your
feeling was gonna be, but I knew it was going
to be about your hair.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
I'm sat in the state. Oh sorry, I set this stup. Well,
they don't know what Okay, so wait a second.
Speaker 4 (01:34):
I could say this because I'll forget one thing that
does kind of get my tails all twisted.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
I was trying to think of afraid. What's another thing
you say?
Speaker 4 (01:45):
Yuck my yeah, okay, that's a phrase people say.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
That Hey good, sure they do. I've never heard anybody
but you say it.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
We also got an email I don't know if we
read it where a mom said it and her daughter
was like, Mom, don't ever say that again.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
I'm sorry. Yeah, because it's definitely not like what all
the cool kids are saying. I'm not claiming to be cool,
like you know how we say fire, sick or whatever.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
A big one right now is I'm about to crash out,
which is I'm about to lose it, and I feel
like your hair is causing me to crash out.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
I am crashing out.
Speaker 4 (02:21):
Okay, I have to read this because speaking of cool things,
I got a text last night from a friend of
mine and she said, we just had a waiter describe
a dish to us as the missionary sex of chicken dishes.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
So it's just like, you know, playing plan.
Speaker 4 (02:42):
But then I said where, I won't say where, and
she said, he actually said, usually the half chicken is busting',
but this version is the missionary sex of chicken. And
I said, did you end up getting it? And she said,
we did not get it. We're not going to be
the boring couple because they are a kind of like
(03:03):
a cool couple out on a day, say, like kids
and they're going out, but like how And I was like, ool,
that's so funny. I wish that kid was my waiter.
And she was like, he was like thirty five.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
I don't think.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
I don't think I would want a kid waiter talking
to me about missionary and sex.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Okay, well I think it's better than he was thirty five.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
I don't want a teenager being like this. One's like
the missionary's yes, but also like funny not selling the dish, Well, no,
not at all.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
Where were we Well, you're crashing out. I'm crashing out.
But I have to say this too before I crash out.
Speaker 4 (03:38):
One of the things that twists my ties when I
say it, gets my ties all twisted.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
And yuktu're young, yeah, is when you.
Speaker 4 (03:44):
Have something that you're looking forward to eating and it's
in the fridge and you're like, oh, it's like leftovers.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
You're like, I'm.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
Gonna go have the leftover Chinese food or pizza or whatever,
and you open the door and it's gone.
Speaker 3 (03:59):
So you understand I crashed out with the pineapple.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
When you were looking forward to food.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
It was a full thing of pineapple, like full in hand.
Speaker 4 (04:07):
If you're like, oh, that juicy pineapples and the fridge
waiting for me, I can't wait to just go eat it.
Speaker 2 (04:11):
And then you're like, oh, I get it.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
So I came from school in cross country, so I
get he was hot and tired and probably thirsty and
pineapples juicy and hydrating and like yum, and he ate
the entire cut up thing to where I'm like, now
now there's no more.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
Now there's no I don't get doesn't get any pineapple.
Speaker 3 (04:37):
I don't get any pineapples to shear when I'd probably
pack that in her lunch tour like I started, I
started bringing in.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
To share it. It's true she did to your sister.
Speaker 3 (04:50):
She had been packing it in her lunch and now
it's gone. And the thing is there's oranges, apples, bananas
and stores pretty QUI.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Yeah, but I said.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
I looked at him and I said, Hoever I was
crashing out. I said, we need to learn to diversify.
Speaker 5 (05:12):
Because then it won't just you know, oh does it
bear her in one sitting? You know, like you can't
just like ever take a thingful of everything.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
You need it all when you.
Speaker 3 (05:25):
Share ols with people because you're never gonna have roommates
when you go to college. Yes, because I'm like, you
need like, look, you could have gotten a little bit
of pineapple, and you could have gotten an apple and
then eating a banana and then gotten all these different nudes.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
What was he like, Mom, are you okay? You just
looked at me and he was like okay. Like it's
like he's like, I thought you wanted us to eat.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
Fruit, and like I do want them to eat fruit,
and yes, I can go get another pineapple.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
I'm not saying what I did.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
Was okay, But as the kids say, I just crashed
out a little bit and I did have regret and
I did tell sorry, and I said eat the fruit.
I want you to eat the fruit. I said, However,
there is something too diversifying the fruit, like I really
meant that part, like, don't just like because they can
get fixated on like they just go and they need
a variety. And then also that keeps me from having
(06:15):
to go back to the grocery store. I want to
go once a week, do you know what? And teenage
boys they eat a lot, and so diversify the fruit
because then that keeps everybody happy. Now get to the
regret on your hair.
Speaker 4 (06:30):
I'm just thinking of Stevenson in therapy, like at thirty
five years old, being like, one time, diversify the fruit,
and now I can't eat a whole apple anymore.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
No, you can eat a whole apple.
Speaker 3 (06:42):
It'd be like if he opened up the door and
ate all the apples, okay, or all the oranges because
he ate all the pineapple.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
Okay, that's funny.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
Yeah, great, sorry mom, Okay, what's happening with the hair?
Speaker 4 (06:56):
Okay, so back to about a week ago. I got
so I told you this. I was like, I want
to shave my head because my hair. I was just
having those over stimulated moments where like my hair was
so long. It was like it didn't really do anything
because it was so long in all the same length
and like you know when your hair gets so long,
it's caught in your armpit and stuff, you know, itching, Yes.
Speaker 2 (07:19):
Because I had these flyaways.
Speaker 4 (07:21):
I don't know how, but I got like a chunk
of hair cut in the front of my head. You
can't see this anybody that's listening, but there was a
small probably thirty strands of hair got like cut like that.
I don't know how, so they would like tickle my forehead.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
Which I know you just said you can't see this.
So I wanted to remind people we are on YouTube except
for not this episode. We're not filming today, just circumstances
because of all I'm talking about right now, Cat didn't
want a film because of her hair. Just kidding, just kidding.
We don't have our whole crew here, so it just
got nice. So you know, I know that some of
you that do watch us on YouTube. You might be like,
(07:58):
wait a second, what happened?
Speaker 2 (07:59):
But if you haven't.
Speaker 3 (08:00):
Subscribed over on YouTube, you can because we are growing
over there, which is so fun to see because most
of our loyal people listen via podcast when they're out
and about. But YouTube, shut up, plug okay, keep going.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Hair Okay, So my hair was like tickling me. So
that's what I was. I felt was like there's like
bugs crawling on my head. That's what it felt like.
But I think it was just like over stimulation.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
And if I think about it, I had a lot
going on, so I probably was just overwhelmed and I
was taking it out on my hair.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Anyway.
Speaker 4 (08:29):
I got it cut and I probably got four inches
cut off, which.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
Is a lot.
Speaker 4 (08:34):
Yeah, that's a lot, and I feel like I have
a bowl cut.
Speaker 2 (08:40):
But it's still past your shoulders. A bowl cut is
way like.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
I know that it's your hair, so you're feeling it,
but I'm telling you as an onlooker, it looks good.
But I know that you've been also just trying to
like take matters into your own hands now, and I mean,
you just need to let it go.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I did cut a couple things myself keep cutting it
or maybe this is deeper because it's like too much
change and not enough change at the same time. I
don't know.
Speaker 4 (09:06):
I haven't processed it, which means I probably shouldn't be
talking about it right now. But all that to say,
I wish I could take two inches back on my hair.
Speaker 3 (09:16):
So in a couple of months, two inches will grow
and that that's when it will be.
Speaker 4 (09:20):
But what I am doing is I stopped getting it colored.
And this all goes back to if you guys listen
to the Hot Girl Hamster Wheel episode where I'm like,
why am I coloring my hair? My hair is actually
not to toot my own horn. But I have a
pretty natural hair color.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
Yeah, I think it's really pretty, like a really pretty brunette, and.
Speaker 4 (09:39):
It looks good with my skin tone. So why have
I been putting blonde highlights in it. It's just like
I got into this routine of doing it, and so
I didn't do that. So I do feel really good
about that, and I actually do really like the color.
Speaker 3 (09:49):
Well, so you want to know about cutting the four
inches off though, that helps like get go out of
that color off. So this is you just having more
of your fresh hair.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Also, don't know how to do my hair. That's another thing.
Speaker 4 (10:03):
I just don't know how to do my hair at
this length anymore because it was long for so long
that how I curled it before it doesn't work.
Speaker 3 (10:09):
Now I'm like trying to figure out the metaphor for
life here, Like how oh.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
You keep thinking? I'll keep talking you think about a metaphor?
Speaker 4 (10:16):
She asked me if I wanted her to do the
wave like I usually do, or for her to do
the blowout look? And I said, what's the blowout look?
And she said, oh, everybody's doing the blowout look? Now,
why don't we try it? And she did it and
I actually really liked it. And then I did it
myself today and I was like, you look like a
second grader and you tried to curl your own hair.
I think I just need to practice.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
Is that the metaphor that I need to When you've
start something new, be patient, hit on it until you practice.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
You're a beginner. I'm a beginner.
Speaker 4 (10:47):
Allow you're reaching so far, but I'm going to help
you out. You're allowed to be a beginner with things
that you've never done before.
Speaker 3 (10:57):
Yeah, that's true. Like I talk about this aff styled
hair this length.
Speaker 4 (11:01):
Well, I have it, just like in times with different
hairstyles were cool because I used to always have a
top knot. I would cut my hair short and just
put it on top knot, and that was like my thing.
Speaker 3 (11:10):
So why don't you just do that?
Speaker 2 (11:12):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (11:12):
I felt like I outgrew the topknot. Maybe next week
I'll be wearing a topknot if I do, just don't say.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Anything that top not like the missionary style hairstyles or
is it bustin'.
Speaker 2 (11:23):
I guess we'll have to see.
Speaker 4 (11:26):
But I have to say this now because you reminded
me of it. How a lot of adults have troubled
starting new things and trying new things because when we're adults,
we feel like we have to be automatically good at something.
But as kids, if you look back on the things
that I played soccer, I was on the year around
swim team even though I couldn't dive. I did gymnastics, dance,
(11:47):
acting classes. I tried everything and did not think twice
about it because I was young and I felt like
I was allowed to be a beginner and learn. But
as adults, we for some reason get embarrass or feels
shame when we're not automatically good at something. And so
I asked my clients a lot who are in this space,
(12:07):
what's something you would do if you only had to
be like sixty percent good at it? And maybe for
me that answer is I would curl my hair a
new way.
Speaker 3 (12:17):
Or maybe it's like you don't have to be good
at it's just like what would you do if you
had if there wasn't this.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Fear attached to it?
Speaker 3 (12:23):
Because that reminds me of this email I'm about to
read and like us relaunching the podcast together, because I
think for me, I had some fear around that. I
had excitement because I knew relaunching it with you was
going to be amazing, but also like I had had
four things for so many years and had built that,
and you had you Need Therapy podcast and we were
going to be emerging something, and like what if it
(12:44):
didn't work and then our friendship blew up crashed out
because you made all want pineapple or something.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
I will never don't worry? Well, yeah, because that yacku're
youm too? Yeah, you don't want people to eat all.
Speaker 3 (12:57):
The food you're looking forward to in the fridge so
we got an email from a confused listener. In fact,
that's the subject line. So we got an email from
(13:18):
a confused listener. In fact, that's the subject line. In
regards to our rebrand, our shift into Feeling Things, which
we started discussing privately between the two of us back
in August, should we rebrand the podcast and you come
on full time? And then it took from August that
initial conversation all the way to April. April first is
(13:40):
when we went live with the rebrand, so that was
eight months, and I would say the first few months
after August were like, Okay, should we really do this?
And I remember having fear around it, and then it's
a lot of work. So it's almost like also, sometimes
what would you do, like if you didn't have to
think of it out the work you would have to
(14:01):
put into it, because sometimes we put things off because
the well, but we had to do it upfront and
the now that we're on the other side of it
totally worth it. Maybe because we do have this listener,
this listener email, do youar Feeling Things podcast? I'm a
longtime listener and fan of Four Things with Amy Brown
and enjoyed the episodes with Kat. I only listen to
podcasts during my evening walks with my dog, and four
(14:23):
Things is in my go to pick. For years, I've
been listening to the new Feeling Things podcast and I'm
having a hard time understanding the structure and the overall
goal each episode. I feel confused and I have no
idea the point of each episode. I want to keep listening, However,
I find myself waiting for the overall purpose. Can you
all explain the structure? I do get that you all
(14:44):
pick a feeling word at the beginning of an episode,
but after that it seems to go many unknown directions.
Thanks four Things listener. So okay, I get that. Yeah,
because sometimes I feel confused too, and I think what
for me has been beautiful about this process is stepping
(15:06):
into the unknown and the scary at times and not
really knowing. And one thing Kat and I wanted was
to discuss feelings, which I think in every single episode
we do that like a variety of different feelings. It
may not look, you know, super quote unquote structured, like oh,
we're moving on to this next feeling, but we share
(15:27):
a lot from our lives or stories or things that
we're watching feelings that we're having about everything from a
TV show to a book to something that happened to
us out in the wild. You know, Like recently I
talked about a guy hitting on me when I was
with my kids, and we've got an email coming up
from another listener that's a story sort of similar that
(15:48):
happened to her in the wild, which the story is
blowing my mind now that I think about it, like
they took guts for this guy.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
To do what he did.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
But we'll get to that email in a minute. But
also speaking of these emails we're getting, another thing is
the feeling of connection and the connection with y'all. So
this email we're going to read coming up as from
a listener that has interacted with us multiple times, and
we don't know her, but we feel like we know her.
And while not a lot of us have met in person,
(16:18):
some of us maybe have in the past at for things,
live events or something. But our hope is that you
have a feeling of connection and you feel like you're
listening to your friend's talk, and so that is our vibe,
that is our energy, that is our structure. Now we
will have the occasional deep dive which Kat delivered our
(16:39):
first one ever about mel Robbins and the let Them
theory beautifully done.
Speaker 2 (16:43):
Kat.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
People are raving about it or they're feeling having feelings
about it. They're having feelings, like lots of feelings about it.
And with that, I'll say we are going to continue
to do more deep dives, but we also want to
be clear that deep dives are not always going to
be about people. They might be about topics or cults
or ideas, idea other things. We're open to requests, so
(17:06):
y'all can email us things you would like for us
to deep dive on. Hey, they're at feeling things. Podcasts
dot com.
Speaker 4 (17:13):
Could even be like a trend like, yes, deep dive
on La booboos, Yeah my.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
Death those are yes, I know what they are, but
I wouldn't be interested in that.
Speaker 4 (17:20):
Which I'm just saying like a trend that I want
to be super interested in, although I I am a
little confused by it that I'm intrigued, not intrigued like
I want to buy one.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
Yeah, if y'all don't know what laboobos are, they're like
these little stuffed animals that clip on bags and they're
they look like monsters so expensive they look like monsters.
Speaker 4 (17:37):
Yeah, but my point in saying that is it could
be like some kind of trend that's happening or has
happened in the past.
Speaker 3 (17:43):
Oh that like we don't get Maybe I would be
into that because it would help me understand, Yeah, help
me understand why people are adults are putting these.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
If firebags just happened, we could do a deep dive
on firefest, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
Yeah, like things that happen in pop culture.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
There will be you know, but the point I think
off shoots like that, and then there's also going to
be series like We've got The Four Horsemen coming up,
which I want you to touch on. Again, Cat's a
therapist and this is a mental health minded podcast, I
think is how we branded it so it can lean
therapy at times. And also again we really our main
(18:22):
goal is Cat and I chatting, and you all feel
like you're sitting with your girlfriends and you're having a
talk or hey, guys, you're here too, girlfriends, boyfriends.
Speaker 4 (18:32):
Well, also I'll say, like, just like you're talking with
your friends, Like sometimes those conversations are lighthearted and fun
and silly and random, and sometimes those conversations are more
vulnerable and deep, and they're about your friend telling you
something that they learned or telling you something that is
interesting to them. And that's what the structure is. Is
that the structure is that we have a certain idea
(18:53):
of how we interact with each other, and we allow
whatever is showing up within our friendship in our lives
to come here.
Speaker 2 (18:59):
So when we are sharing something with you, like the.
Speaker 4 (19:02):
Mel Robins saying, or the Four Horsemen, it's because those
things have been of value to us or are interesting
to us, or we've been talking about them or learning
about them. So it is I think the connection piece
is huge too in that well. But yeah, and the
four Horsemen. If you're like, what is that? It is
John Gotman, who is a very famous relationship marriage therapists.
(19:27):
I don't know if he's a psychologist and researcher. Yeah,
he's done more research on couples. I mean, he's if
you want to go to if you want to be
a couple's therapists, you often are doing the Gotman training.
I have not done that. I am not a couple's therapists. However,
his research found these four things that he uses to
determine with ninety percent accuracy, which is insane, sane if
(19:52):
a relationship will survive or end, and we're going to
split because there's so much we can say about them,
going to split those up into four episodes, either.
Speaker 2 (20:02):
Two or four. I think four. Okay, we'll see.
Speaker 4 (20:05):
How wait we always are like, we'll do both of
those in the same episode, and then the episode's five
hours long, right, No.
Speaker 3 (20:10):
I think that we make it one horseman per episode
because we may go on tantangents. You never know, we
may end up talking about dryer balls.
Speaker 4 (20:19):
Which is that's the structure and that's fun, where like
we're not so regimented. And I'll say, for myself, I
have to have a couple different podcasts that are in
my rotation personally, because I like the podcast that is
just random and fun and like so just out there,
and then I like the podcasts that you learn from,
and then I like the podcasts that are more structured.
(20:41):
But I have to have a variety because I can't
just do one of those. So we're bringing you all
those things into one damn kind of So be looking
forward to the four Horsemen. And again, if you do
have something you're like I want to learn about this
or my friends have been talking about this, let us know, Hey.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
Does that?
Speaker 3 (21:02):
Yeah, and make sure you're following on Instagram at Feeling
Things podcast and TikTok, because.
Speaker 2 (21:10):
We're gonna do something like if you live.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
Close to Nashville and the Nashville area coming up at
the end of September, we've got an event. We're picking
people to come to Top Golf with us for a
charity for Foster Care, and like we're gonna have a
Feeling Things team and y'all are going to be our
guest so it's fun, but those that's how we can
interact and give those slots away, So make sure you're
following over there and we'll be doing that sort of soon,
(21:35):
so that way in case people need to plan obviously
their calendars and even come, Like I know some people
were saying, oh, I would I live only a couple
hours away, so I would drive, So I know some
people need to plan. But community and connection, I think
those two words are big for both of us. So
we're looking forward to that event so that we can
connect with y'all in person, but without the in person stuff,
(21:57):
which hopefully we'll plan more of that in the future,
saying that for the last few years, we haven't done
it live in a while. But also life has gotten
crazy at times. I think that happens to everybody where
you have something on your agenda for the year and
then you take a look at it later and you're like,
this doesn't really make sense for me to put all
this work into this right now when I have this
(22:17):
happening in life. So I know, with Kat and I
even making this switch, that we have a little bit
more flexibility than we had before because now we have it.
We're a team and we have a bigger team helping us.
But also one of our goals is to do more
in person things, So that's part of our plan and
we want y'all to know that because so many of
you have reached out, when is the next live or
(22:38):
I would love to plan for it because I am
I'd fly there, which is so cool to think about,
and we want that for y'all. So just know we're
going to be working on something because we love that
stuff too. So thank you for the email. And being
confused is good because then you get to ask a question,
and then you get information, and then you get to
(22:58):
decide for yourself if this is something that you want
to keep listening to, and we certainly hope that you do.
We love having each and every one of you here,
especially our girl Karen, who has emailed and if you know,
you know. But here's what Karen sent us after hearing
a recent episode where I shared that a guy like
gave me his business card while I was with my kids.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
Which someone said.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
I don't know if it was after they emailed or
texted or I mean DMed or said it to one
of us later, but like, the more shocking part was
that he had a business card.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
Why is that shocking a lot of people.
Speaker 3 (23:33):
Don't carry business cards anymore, do they?
Speaker 4 (23:35):
You know what? It is shocking because I have business
cards and I never have one when I need it.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Well, maybe you should start carrying around. I shouldn't start
carrying them around.
Speaker 6 (23:43):
Or here's what Karen wrote, right, here's what Karen wrote.
Speaker 3 (23:57):
Hey, Amy and Kat, thank you for making me laugh
out loud today. While I was listening to Tuesday's episode,
I was gardening, so the neighbors probably thought I was crazy.
When I lived in Montana a gazillion years ago, I
was in line at the grocery store and heard the
little girl behind me say to her dad, this thing
smells like armpits.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
I turned around to see what she was talking about.
It was a.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
Plexiglass divider thing, and I laughed. I turned back around
and proceeded to start writing out my check to pay
for my groceries. Two nights later, I got a call
from a guy. It was the dad, and he wanted
to take me on a date. I must have sounded
very confused because he said, I watched you write your
phone number on your check. I was twenty five ish
(24:40):
and dumb, so I said yes. But I told my
best friend and she insisted on coming with me on
the date, mainly because he was a taxidermist and she
had concerns.
Speaker 2 (24:49):
Lol. Thankfully he was cool.
Speaker 3 (24:51):
With that nice guy, but I was in my bar
girl era, so dating a single dad was not in
alignment with my goals. Every time I remember it, though,
I do you have to give him props for shooting
his shot, your friend, Karen. I mean, I am blown
away that he creeped on her writing her phone number
down and either memorized it or wrote it down himself,
(25:14):
because I mean, he didn't have a cell phone back then.
Like he couldn't like dial it right away, so he
had to like get that number, and he held it
for two days and then he called her.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
I am trying to think of the right feeling.
Speaker 4 (25:28):
I want to say shocked, but I'm more like in
awe in alle feels too positive.
Speaker 2 (25:34):
I'm shocked that she went or that he did that
in multiple.
Speaker 4 (25:38):
Ways, that he was first of all, close enough and
had good enough eyesight, Because I have to be pretty
close to somebody to be able to see them writing
something like that down.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Well, yeah, your eyesight is terrible. Stop attacking me. Oh sorry, sorry,
I'm just kidding.
Speaker 4 (26:00):
Regardless, you have to be pretty close to see somebody
writing their phone number on a check. Also, you have
to be staring like he is staring. That is bold,
and I am impressed by him. It sounds like he
just really wanted to take this person on a date
and maybe didn't want to ask in front of his child.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (26:16):
But what also, as I'm saying this, is that how
it happened back then, Because that's wild that you would
just see somebody at the grocery store and be like, oh,
she's about to write a check. Oh they write first
of all, she's writing a check at the grocery store.
I don't think they even take checks anymore. That he's like, oh,
she's about to write a check. I bet she's gonna
write a phone down and they have to stare at it.
(26:38):
That's how you did it.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
Yeah. I Meanwhile, I met my husband on a dating map. Yeah,
he wiped.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
Yeah, things have changed, but I mean someone could still
do that now if they overhear you say your phone
number or something. But I would be like, oh my gosh,
that's kind of creepy.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
But would you think it's creepy if it was back then?
Speaker 3 (26:56):
I don't think the time matters. I think when someone
does something bold like that, if you're attracted them, or
think if there's an attraction, then it's acceptable. If you're not,
then you're like they're a soccer weirdo.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (27:07):
I agree, But I do think the extra element of
it being back then that was probably more normalized than
it is now. People don't even go up to you
in person half the time to ask you out. They'll
just like go on a dating app.
Speaker 3 (27:17):
So yeah, I feel like some of that is kind
of coming back, though people are missing the.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Same shit had it happened twice to you. Twice.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
No, I like, oh, well he found me through someone else.
That's the same thing.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
I mean, that's pretty. He also came up and said
hi to you. Oh yeah, that's right. Yeah you did.
Men coming up to you're left and right must be nice.
You're like, oh, I mean, it's coming back. It's happened
to me six times in the past week now whatever.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
My current boyfriend did it to me at the grocery store,
which okay, fine, and then I did Yeah, I had
the business card guy the other day. That's not six times,
I know, but like, oh, this is making me think
of that show though, well, just going on dates with
people and then that guy being a taxidermist, you know,
because being scared he might murder you. That show it's
(28:10):
been on Netflix. It's a movie for at least maybe
a year or two with Anna Kendrick, Woman of the Hour,
where it's based on a true story from back in
the day where this woman went on a game show
and she was matched with a serial killer because a
serial killer went on as one of the contestants. Like
the girl was getting matched with guys and I tried
to start watching it the other night and I had
(28:31):
to turn it off because it was so disturbing and
I can't believe that this is real life and it
actually happened.
Speaker 2 (28:39):
But I've never heard of that. You got to be
careful out there are people. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (28:43):
In one of his tactics, of course, he had the
game show thing, which I never even made it to
the part where I saw him on the show, but
leading up to it, they show how he starts.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
Since this very beginning. So I'm not getting anything away
in case you've been.
Speaker 3 (28:56):
Looking forward to watching this on Netflix, but it has
been up there a while and this is a real story,
so maybe you even know what happened. But he's like
the nicest guy, and he would take pictures as a
photographer of women and it make them feel special. Like
one girl, I guess he was like, Hey, let's go
to this beautiful forest, like a desert, like it was
(29:16):
in the desert in the middle of nowhere, right, but
beautiful scenery. And now you're out in the middle of
nowhere with this man has a camera, but you think
he's a photographer and he's taking your photos and he
seems gentle and kind and nice and encouraging and like,
you know, like making you feel good in front of
the camera and then next thing, you know, So that
was his thing, and so kind of like he looked
like this nice photographer guy. They'd be like, hey, oh,
(29:38):
hold that smile. Oh you look like you're so cute
right there. Hold it, hold it, hold it.
Speaker 2 (29:42):
And then you you kind of let your guard down.
Speaker 3 (29:44):
You're like, oh, and then he kills you. Yeah, yes,
that was his thing. I don't know how many women,
but it's called Woman of the Hour. So go watch
that if you want to. And if he wants something
lighter but also vulgar, then you can check out Righteous
Jumpstones on HBO Max.
Speaker 2 (30:00):
I've been talking about that, which.
Speaker 3 (30:01):
Kadenary Christians definitely don't watch it with like your grandparent
type Christians. I don't know that my parents would have.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
My parents watched it.
Speaker 3 (30:09):
Oh, they okay, and they love it.
Speaker 2 (30:11):
They think it's funny. But I did. I don't know
if they've seen the last season.
Speaker 4 (30:14):
And I did tell I warned them because they thought
it was hilarious and said, if you watch the fourth season,
just know.
Speaker 2 (30:19):
They take it a little too far. It just gets weird. Yeah,
it's a little too weird, real.
Speaker 3 (30:23):
Weird, like there's some stuff Where'm like, Okay, could have
done without seeing that, Like I don't need to see that.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
You don't have to say it that way. It's like that,
keep making it more ridiculous.
Speaker 3 (30:31):
Yeah, they're making fun of meg megachurches and megachurch pastors
and families and so somebody.
Speaker 2 (30:38):
It's kind of spot on.
Speaker 3 (30:39):
It's like four seasons and I started watching it years
ago on and off, and then I was under the
weather recently, I guess, like a week or two ago,
and I had a lot of free time, and I
watched all of it, like season three, season four, and
I'm all the way.
Speaker 2 (30:54):
Colt are the one that got me to watch it
in the first place, oh, way back in the day.
Speaker 3 (30:57):
Yeah, okay, I'm such a huthan.
Speaker 2 (31:01):
So anyway, check that out.
Speaker 3 (31:02):
On a lighter note, because Woman of the Hour is
definitely heavy.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
I have a question.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
Not to change the subject, no, fine, I'd rather stop
talking about Well.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
I'm bringing it back to the email which from Karen. Yes,
we laughed out loud when we read this email. It
really entertained me. Would you or have you ever gone
on a date with.
Speaker 4 (31:23):
A friend like they're going on a date and you
just are like, I'm gonna come with you because I
don't for whatever reason.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
Have you ever been the third wheel on like a
first date, on a first date? No, I have had people.
Speaker 3 (31:37):
At my house for my first date when I'm getting
picked up, like okay, my friends.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
Like be here, but not go on the date, but
like be here for the pick up. Also, I wonder
if it's different. Now, that's a good idea.
Speaker 4 (31:48):
It's also wait a second, Well, I guess you're dating
people that you know through somebody, because if you're just
letting a stranger pick you up on a first date,
that's wild.
Speaker 3 (31:57):
Well I did let my current boyfriend pick me up
at my house for the first date because we have
mutual friends. Yeah, that's the only reason.
Speaker 4 (32:04):
Oh my gosh, so your first interaction with him is
like a thirty minute car ride.
Speaker 3 (32:09):
Yeah, well, I mean he picked me up, came to
my door, came in and met me, met cry okat
was here?
Speaker 2 (32:13):
Were you so nervous? I don't remember this, but then
I do it.
Speaker 3 (32:17):
I think I was a little nervous. But remember I
was just coming off of the whole lunch with Leslie debacle,
oh with the other guy. So I was like, yeah,
I was in. My therapist was like, you need to
adult date. So I'm like, he look here, I am.
I'm out here adult dating. Look at me in a
thirty minute car ride to a restaurant. Plus, I was
really excited about the restaurant we were going to because
I hadn't been there yet and I'd wanted to go,
(32:37):
so was worth a thirty minute drive. And he wasn't
that awkward And I thought it was his car. I
didn't know the car we were in. Come to find
out later though, is his dead wife's car.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
He didn't even bring his car.
Speaker 3 (32:50):
I'm like, oh, so this is your wife's car that
passed away. I shouldn't have stood it that.
Speaker 2 (32:54):
Way, dead wife's car, but like that's in my brain.
Speaker 3 (32:56):
I'm like, wait, this is your This isn't even your car,
Like you're driving the car that she drove.
Speaker 2 (33:02):
I wonder if I've wanted her with him to support
I think this is far away gets a better gas mileage.
Oh it's not that deep.
Speaker 4 (33:11):
Well, I was gonna say, I wonder if now, because
because we can share locations with people on our phone,
people don't feel the need to like go on the
date like back then. I don't know how many years
ago this was, but back then, like oh well when there.
Speaker 3 (33:23):
Was an hour, no Karen's oh Karen, this was twenty
five years ago, so.
Speaker 4 (33:27):
Okay, So like you couldn't know where your friend was
if they were going on a date with a stranger.
Speaker 2 (33:31):
So you're like, I'll go with you.
Speaker 4 (33:33):
But now it's just would you share your location with
me so I can just know if you're a kid? Exactly, Yes,
So it's not that right now that would be a
little bit more weird because we don't have to do that,
But back then it was probably actually like pretty smart.
Speaker 3 (33:44):
Yeah, you're gonna go out with some random guy that's
calling you from the grocery store that stalked your number. Yes,
that's a good friend. I hope you're still friends with
that person. But if you're not, we we sect that
because things things happen, and Kat and I hope to
be friends for a long time now. Yeah, but working
together has its challenges. However, we do love our sib
(34:06):
don't take that personally. It's just when you work closely
with somebody. Yeah, right, when I said that, you but
I don't mean that, I just mean I think we
have good systems in play.
Speaker 2 (34:15):
Yeah, I was kind of joking. I don't want you
to secure. Good.
Speaker 3 (34:20):
Well, we love that you're here, even if you're confused
or you're totally clear on what's happening, confused or clear.
We're here for the connection and community.
Speaker 2 (34:33):
C C c CC clear, confused, connection and community. That's us.
Come as you are.
Speaker 3 (34:40):
Yeah, listen, okay, follow us on Instagram, TikTok, Feeling Things podcast.
Like I said, YouTube, mean where every guys work.
Speaker 2 (34:48):
We're everywhere. You can't escape us.
Speaker 3 (34:51):
Yeah all right, Well, we hope you're having the day
the day you need to have.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
How hard on that b
Feeling Things with Amy & Kat News
Host
Amy Brown
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