December 18, 2025 • 30 mins
Amy and Kat unpack an anonymous listener’s question about a friendship that suddenly feels…off. From backhanded comments about Botox to unsolicited opinions about glasses and clothes, this listener wonders: Am I overreacting, or is my friend actually making me feel small?
Then, an email from Emily, who shares how a new medical diagnosis led her to a moment of deep self-compassion. Her story is a reminder to treat our bodies with kindness…especially when they’re going through something hard.
Also, there’s a false alarm about Christmas!!!!!!!!
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HOSTS:
Amy Brown // RadioAmy.com // @RadioAmy
Kat Van Buren // threecordstherapy.com // @KatVanburen
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Good.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
All right, break it down.
Speaker 3 (00:05):
If you ever have feelings that you just falls home
maybe and cat gotcha coviing like likeing, no, brother ladies
and polos.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
We just follow an the.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Spirit where it's all the front.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Over real stuff to the chill stuff and the m
but Swayne, sometimes the best thing you can do it
just stop you feel things.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
This is feeling things with Amy and Kat. Okay, Happy Thursday, everybody.
It is December eighteenth. Hi, Amy, I've got and we're
just gonna we're adding this at the beginning. It's a
little disclaimer that Kat and I, halfway through the recording
this episode realize it's not Christmas. We realized this episode
(00:49):
is December eighteenth, a full week before Christmas. But we're
gonna go ahead and leave all our Christmas talk in
it because it was the beginning, and so next week
we'll do it again for a real Christmas. But this
is just a disclaimer saying, you know, it's not Christmas.
I don't anybody freaking out gosh driving to work Christmas.
(01:14):
Did Christmas get moved to the eighteenth. No, it's always
on the twenty fifth, so always always, like you know,
so yeah it is. It's not Christmas, and you'll hear
us in real time discover that it's not Christmas.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
Okay, good for you.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
So yeah, here you go. Happy Thursday, Happy Thursday, and
Merry Christmas.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
Merry Christmas.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
He Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas, and happy Holidays from Amy
and Cat. How welcome to couch talks.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
I'm not gonna give a disclaimer today.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
I was at your Christmas cap to us, but we
actually I have an email that's got a little bit
of drama, so we might need the disclaimer. Give it
at the end to.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Be a rebel. Okay, ooh ooh.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
Yeah, what if I give it as a gift?
Speaker 1 (02:10):
You think they'll like it better if you say it.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
So Kat is a therapist and she's gonna give advice
after I read the email, but you need to take
it with a grain of salt because she doesn't have
all your history and she's not your actual therapist. So
this is not a replacement for therapy. This is just
two girls talking about your problems.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Yours is way longer than mine.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
Yeah, but it had a vibe.
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
We hope wherever y'all are on this day of December
twenty fifth, twenty twenty five that you are feeling loved
and safe and happy and with family maybe, but if
you're not, you're with us, and we're like, we'll be
your family right now, you're feeling things family. I saw this.
It's better as a graphic, so you kind of have
(02:54):
to imagine it. I see it posted every holiday season,
but it's a holiday to do list. That's not what
you think. I feel like I've even talked about on
the podcast, probably four things back in the day at
some point. But you know, at the top of the
list of your holiday to do list is like buy presence,
and sure that needs to get done. So it's not
necessarily a below the line thing, but the like above
(03:16):
the line thing is to scratch out the word by
and then scratch out the s on presence, so instead
of buy presence, you turn it into be present, like
be present with your people. Like it's like a play
on words. See if you look at it, how you
see what I'm doing. So we're gonna do our best
to describe this to people.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Okay, And I was like, if you scratch out by,
it doesn't spell B. You put the you put the.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Word Sorry I didn't say that part, but it's like
a holiday to do list, Like that's edited to be
above the line because that's what really matters this season.
I mean, sure, we do the whole gift thing, but
what really matters is not buying presence but being present.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
Yeah, and I will say I enjoy buying presents, so
I would edit that to be present while you're buying
presents because I can also get well, I can.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
That is so above above a buffal line.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
I love it. Well, I can get like tangled up
in the like getting the perfect gift, and so then
I feel paralyzed and I don't buy anything and I
overthink it. But like, I like buying presents, and so
I need to just be present while I'm doing it
and enjoy it versus like make it into something that
it's not.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Yeah, be present while buying present. Why did we do
it's not Christmas? At the beginning of the episode? Did
I act like it was Christmas? Because it's not. Okay,
so yeah, it's not. It's not Christmas. Like I'm doing
the holiday to do list, and I'm like, you know,
it came to me because I'm like, wait a second,
(04:42):
people aren't buying or presents anymore because today's Christmas, like
we should have done this holiday to do list a
week ago. And then I'm like, wait a second.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Well, you know what's interesting is you were looking at
me with a weird face, and I thought you were
like telling me to stop talking about it. Okay, we
get it.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
No, I was that was my thinking face of like, yeah,
what is the date? Because the next thing after be
present after you edit by presence is wrap presence, and
you edit that one to say wrap others in love.
Speaker 1 (05:17):
I thought you would say wrap yourself in a blanket.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
Okay, you can do that too, And then I thought,
like my brain was thinking, like is anybody be wrapping presents?
It's already Christmas.
Speaker 1 (05:27):
Hopefully you've wrapped your presence.
Speaker 2 (05:29):
Yeah, so instead of wrapping presents, you wrap others in
love or yourself in a blanket. The third one is
send cards. What do you think you edit that one
to be.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Send love close.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
It could be that it's they changed it to peace,
but yeah, send love, send peace, send hopes, en joy,
send nudes. Just kidding, don't.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
Don't do that.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
Unless you don't do that, sorry, I've already lost it.
The fourth one is shop for food. It's been edited
shop for friends. Don't shop for friends. No, no, no,
you you cross out shop four and it's change it
(06:18):
to donate, So donate food.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
My brain wasn't thinking.
Speaker 2 (06:23):
And the fifth one is make cookies, hold.
Speaker 1 (06:25):
On, make babies that might happen to make cookies, make friendship,
make laughter, make family time.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
Make time for yourself. Oho a selfish And then the
final one is see the lights.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
Be the light.
Speaker 2 (06:54):
Yes, boom, you nailed that line, so above the line,
love the line. I love the line. You nailed it. Okay,
that's your holiday to do list.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
Thanks for.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
One week, one more week until Christmas.
Speaker 1 (07:08):
Lucky you, you have one more week till Christmas.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
Merry Christmas.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
Happy. So I take back not doing the disclaimer. Can
I do it at the end. I'm just kidding.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
That was our gift to people.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
Yeah, it's not Christmas. I don't really owe them anything.
Speaker 2 (07:24):
Yeah, well we did give some advice. You can do
do your official disclaimer here if you want to. It
was like talking about it now I think they get it.
What do you have to do in this final week before?
Speaker 1 (07:35):
Nothing? Really like you have to be the light. I
do need to make some cookies to give to people,
but I'm all shopped out. I am all wrapped up too.
I love to wrap my gifts early so I can
see them under the tree. Yeah, it's nice.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
It is nice. I have my decoy presence under the
tree right now. They're just empty boxes that are wrapped,
so right when you put up your tree, you have
presence under there.
Speaker 1 (08:06):
Really smart because when you had smaller children, would you
wrap every present like Christmas Eve? If they go to
bed and then you wrap all the gifts, Like, how
did you do that?
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Yeah? But then also Santa shows.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
Up with you don't wrap Santa's presence.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
Yeah, Santa shows up with them, bring Santa.
Speaker 1 (08:27):
Yes, so you don't have to do that. Yeah, I
got it. So the gifts that you were giving people,
were you?
Speaker 2 (08:36):
I mean, I am such a last minute person. I
was wrapping them last minute?
Speaker 1 (08:39):
Well, because I feel like I would.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
I Well, to be honest, we spent most of our
Christmases in Colorado, and I would travel with them. I
would travel with them unwrapped. And then why because I
was taking them to Colorado and my sister has wrapping
paper like sister was really good at rapping. Well, I
(09:02):
would just borrow her wrapping paper like she would have
the tape, the scissors, the bows, the wrapping paper, and
like cute because she always has an esthetic for the year.
And she's the older sister and I'm the younger one,
and so I just feel like this is what we
do here. It comes amy but the yeah, I know,
I'm sure she was like, yes I have tape, Yes
I have ribbon.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Okay, well, I just wonder that, like do parents or people,
what am I going to be like it's a mom,
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (09:30):
Are you going to do Elf on the Shelf?
Speaker 1 (09:32):
No? No, no, no, no, absolutely no. But I do
want to validate anybody who chooses to do that, that
is great. I am one of those people. I just
listened to a two hour podcast on Elf on the Shelf.
That's how why I just felt really strongly, why are
you looking at me like that?
Speaker 2 (09:49):
A two hour podcast on elf on the show?
Speaker 1 (09:52):
It was be there in five Kay Kennedy.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
Her podcasts are long, awesome, Yeah, yeah, it's her, just.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
Like they're meant to just keep you company. So she
just rambles about it and she read a lot of
like listener emails and stuff about their experience with it.
And my takeaway is, and I know myself. So that's
why I'm saying no, is that once you start it also.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
Once it gets started by the elves.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Well, you adopt the elf, you can adopt the elf
them you can adopt the elf. Once you adopt the elf,
the elf isn't leaving. So I know, once I start something,
I want it to be the best experience that it
can be, and so I will get to ahead of
myself and then I'll have to keep up with it.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
Yeah, I never did it.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
I'm trying to.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
We never adopted it. I never. We never didn't want
to join our family.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
Well, not all families need them, is how that is?
Speaker 2 (10:46):
That?
Speaker 1 (10:47):
How said all the family needs the elf to because
the elf is there to it's surveillance. It's watching and
making sure that you're good. Not all families need an
extra surveillance to then let santano if you're OWD it's
been good or bad.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
Oh, I didn't realize the point of.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
It, which I don't know that. I think some families
elves can do different things because some people adopt the
elves that don't need surveillance, I suppose, But that's the
original I need you guys, anybody who's like interested in
this my thoughts, my actual thoughts. Go listen to that podcast.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
It's it's like a deep dive.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
It's a deep dive. It's also like nonsense, so like
it's not like that big of a deal. But I
after listening to that, I was like, I don't think
that our family will need this, you know what.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
I feel like we need to talk about which we
haven't talked about, and we're not gonna be able to
talk about it now, but eventually, because it's not we're
not done. So maybe once it's done, we need to
talk about Beth's Dead.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
Oh my god. Yeah, yeah, okay, great, thank you for
bringing this up. Everybody, go listen to it.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Yeah, go listen to Beth's Dead, so we can have
someone that told me to listen to it. And then
I talked about it on the Bobby Bone Show, and
then so many listeners started listening to it and they
were deeming me, They're like, thank you so much for
recommending this podcast. I cannot stop listening.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
So good. I put it in our newsletter last week
as a recommendation too.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
So yeah, so if you're and if you got our newsletter,
you're already in the know.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
You're already in the know. It's for anybody who's like, ah,
another podcast. It's short, so it's a limited series. It's
ten episodes, only eight or out right now, and they're short,
like some of them are thirty minutes long. I binged
it in a day and a half, so you can
catch up with us, and then once in two weeks
all of them should be out.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
You can buy their Patreon and listen to all of it.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
But I'm not doing that, so in two weeks we
can talk about it all together.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
It yeah, and we'll dive further into this because we
have emails, Like, we have some emails we're going to
go over. I have one from anonymous and another one
from Emily.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
Wait, totally think that.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Why can't I say that?
Speaker 1 (12:40):
What if? Oh yeah, listen to the I can't.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
Say that, Houston Beep, that be what I just said. Yeah,
I don't want to give anything away from Beth's stead,
I will say after listening to that, though, I have
so many questions about sometimes who or what is happening
with our correspondence with our listeners, whether it's emails from
the podcast or the Bobby Bone Show over twenty years.
(13:07):
I mean, I know for a fact. I mean, I've
had We've had weird things that have happened to us
like this. One listener of ours had a job where
she had access to government information. I don't want to
say too much because back in the day, the FBI
did get involved, but oh my gosh, we all had
to meet with agents because we all got not hacked
(13:27):
in our own stuff, but in our government. Like there's
a government database. Let's say, when you work at a
certain level, you can access information about people. Well, she
worked there, but she didn't have clearance to go in
and look up all the people that she looked up.
She looked up everybody on the show, starting with Bobby,
and then she looked up my stuff and then lunchboxes.
(13:48):
And this is back when we were in pop and
this is not the same thing, but it's like this
weird where we knew exactly who she was like when
the police came, when the FBI came to be, I
was like, oh, I know exactly who that is like.
And I had no idea she would ever do anything
like that. But I had seen her at multiple events.
I knew a lot about her. I sat next to
(14:10):
her at things.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
Yeah, did they come to you first, or did you
guys report something.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
No, they came to us because they were flagged because
she ended up losing her job because when she accessed
things she didn't have clearance for it, flagged something internally,
and then they did an investigation in her, like why
was she looking at these people and what's their relation?
And then they started researching all of us. They're like, wait,
(14:35):
all these people work together. Oh wait, this is a
morning show. Oh wait. And she had a lot of
our personal information. And they asked if we wanted to
press charges, and what do you think I.
Speaker 1 (14:47):
Said, no, you're afraid of retaliation.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Ding ding ding ding.
Speaker 1 (14:51):
This has been going this sphere has been happening for
a long time. Yeah, have you ever heard her? Seen
her again? Okay?
Speaker 2 (14:57):
Wow? Yeah, But then we moved so and then so
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (15:01):
Oh my gosh. The fact that this was back in
the day before you guys were like super super big.
Speaker 2 (15:06):
Yeah. I know. I lived in North Carolina at the time,
so we were probably syndicated in maybe like thirty or
forty markets. But now it's also syndication is so different now.
It was a really big deal to be syndicated back then.
But now everything can be people. Can you set up
a microphone in your bedroom and you can access the
whole world? Syndication is so different. But yeah, when we
(15:27):
first came to Nashville, it was like, oh yeah, we
were going to be in one hundred markets and then
two hundred markets and it was a really big deal.
And then now it's like cool, so Sally, so Sally
at her mom's house. Dang it, you know, which is
cool for Sally.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
That's really great for Sally.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
Yeah, so that was something that was a scary listener moment.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
What makes me wonder how often this happens to people
in general? And yeah, I don't want to give anything
away to go listen to it, and then what a
recap episode that's dead.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
Okay, so speing of listeners, let's get into our first
email and out of the gate, she's saying to be anonymous.
Son don't have her name, but here we go, So
(16:27):
this emailer would like to remain anonymous. Out of the gate,
she said that I would like to remain anonymous. Exclamation
was what she wants. Yeah, love you both the podcast
and the rebrand. I have a fairly new friendship with
a coworker. We started working together last August and became
close pretty quickly. Our kids are close and I really
(16:47):
adore her children. This year, I stepped into a leadership role,
which technically makes me her supervisor. Recently, though, I've noticed
her making comments that feel a little backhanded or subtle
put downs, especially in front of others. For example, we
were talking with a younger person and I said I
still feel like I'm in my twenties. She immediately responded with, well,
(17:12):
it's all the botox, which caught me off guard and
made me feel awful. The person we were talking to
didn't know me well, so bringing up my bowtox felt rude, unnecessary,
and embarrassing. Another example, I just got glasses for the
first time, and I chose a colorful pair because I
don't have to wear them all the time and thought
it would be fun. I'm still adjusting to how they
(17:33):
look on me. Instead of encouraging me, she said why
did you pick those? You should have gotten a solid color,
and then even sent me links to ones she thought
I should have bought. She also made little comments about
my clothes, and honestly, she sometimes just makes me feel
bad and insecure about myself. My mom thinks she's jealous,
but I'm not sure if that's just what moms say.
(17:56):
I hate that I'm stressing about this as a woman
in my thirties, but here I am, am I overreacting?
Speaker 1 (18:04):
So do you want to give feedback or can I
just go into this any thoughts as you were reading it?
Speaker 2 (18:09):
Well, I just read it, so you share your thoughts.
Speaker 1 (18:11):
So first her question is just am I overreacting? Right?
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Correct? Well, and her mom's point of she's just jealous?
Speaker 1 (18:19):
Okay, Well there's no way for us to know. I'm
gonna put that out first. As I was reading that,
I did have at first like a reaction of like
the botox comment, like a little whoa interesting thing to say.
And then right after that, I was like, well, maybe
she was trying to be funny or just like there
is a sense of passive aggressiveness. And at the same time,
(18:41):
I don't know this person, so it could just be
her humor or like how she is with the glasses.
She could be passive aggressive, or she could be really
trying to help, like, oh, you doesn't seem like you
like them? What made you pick those?
Speaker 2 (18:52):
So whoa it isn't she said she's trying to get
used to wearing the glasses. Okay, she just said you
should have gone with the solid color and then sent
her options, but like she already.
Speaker 1 (19:04):
Got there, passive aggressive. I think I'm trying to say, well,
I already bought these, okay, Like that's not helpful.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Yeah, it's not helpful.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
So I don't think that you're overreacting because your reaction
is this doesn't feel good. This reaction is like out
that hurt my feelings. Like, I don't think that can
be an overreaction. And we could sit here and make
up all these stories of like what did she mean
by that, why did she do it? That was weird?
Speaker 3 (19:27):
Or we could share with her that didn't feel good
when you said that. So that simple and that will
solve it. I mean, she's also now in a place
of being.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
She's a ross. Yeah. I wonder if this happened before
she did this happen.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
It seems like she got promoted and then this started already.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
Happening, So there could be you could even say this
is just an idea. She makes a comment and you say,
you know what, I'm just curious. It feels like the
vibe is off between us, like you've made a couple
of comments like the one that you just made. It
hurt my feelings and I just I don't know what's
going on. It feels like something has changed recently, and
you can just ask about that, and it doesn't have
to be let me call you into my office and
(20:07):
sit down, put a meeting on your schedule, and have
this big come to Jesus. It can just be like,
it feels like the vibe has been off lately. Is
there something going on that I need to know about?
And it opens the door up for her to be like, no,
what are you talking about? Or actually, yeah, I have
been feeling a little weird I have been making I mean,
I don't know that she's going to come out and
say I've been making these comments, but it opens the
(20:29):
door to have that back and forth. And then if
she's like, what are you talking about? Then you can
say with the other day, you know how you said
that I feel young because of my botox in front
of our colleague. That just felt really odd and didn't
make me feel really good, and I didn't know if
there was something behind that.
Speaker 2 (20:44):
And then also botox seems like a person thing, like
sometimes you may be open and talk about it, and
other times you may not publicly proclaim to your other
co workers that you have.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
I will say, if you don't say anything about this,
I would be led to believe that she's going to
keep making these comments because it almost is like you're
co signing them, like she's getting away with it, you know.
So it feels like, fine.
Speaker 2 (21:09):
What about our script that when you so you dialogue script?
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Yeah, and I think when you use that that does
make it a little bit more serious. So just be
prepared that you're using these words when you blank. I
felt blank. The story I made up was blank. What
I need is blank, And so that might feel more
I'm trying to give I guess I'm trying to give
her like a lower conflict way to approach that of
like the vibe has been off. But if it doesn't
(21:33):
feel like that's doing the trick, then yes, pull that script.
And if this is she said, it's a new friend.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
Well, she said when they first started working together, they
became fast friends. She said, it's a fairly new friendship
with a coworker. And they started working together last August,
so they did bond pretty quickly. But then this year
she stepped into a leadership role. So I would say
maybe they've been friends for like a year and then
she slipped into the leadership role. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:59):
If if she says another comment like that, I would
encourage you use the script. If she doesn't and this
is just wearing on you, I would bring up the
vibe has felt off and she's like, what are you
talking about? Then you use the script to describe it.
So yeah, that works.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
I have another email from a listener Emily, which by
the way, to anonymous not to just move on so quickly,
but we hope that this works out. You can send
us an update let us know how it goes. Anybody
else listening, you may not be in this exact situation,
but you might be dealing with someone that makes comments,
it has made comments, and maybe you just need to
have a conversation. So hopefully that was hopeful for y'all too.
(22:35):
This email is from Emily, Hey, Amy and Kat, longtime
listener Pause Pause pauser and first time emailer Smiley Face.
I wanted to drop in and first say thank you
for your encouraging podcasts. I love listening to you chat
your advice and it's a pleasure to witness audibly. Lol,
your friendship grow. You guys remind me of my best
(22:57):
friend and I. The reason I'm writing is because of
your latest episode when life feels like a lot. I
went into my appointment this morning thinking things were going
to be normal, but walked away with a diagnosis of
and I might butcher what this is because when I
first read it, just my brain automatically read endometriosis. But
(23:18):
that's not it. It is a dinomiosis, a dnomiosis that
feels like it could be a word, a dinomiosis, and
an understanding that I will need a hysterectomy. And she
just said as a note, I am in my early thirties.
I'm honestly still processing it all. But I truly believe
(23:40):
it was the Lord's timing that this podcast episode came
out the day that it did. While tears were certainly shed,
I definitely needed the reminder to treat my body with
kindness and thank it for the hard work it's doing.
There is no cure for a dinomiosis, and there is
no known reason as to why it happens, so one
(24:02):
can easily look inward and be critical. However, I am
choosing to love my body, especially in this difficult time
and give myself grace too when it gets hard. Something
my best friend and I say when we hear the
other talk negatively about ourselves is hey, don't talk about
my friend like that, And I think that could apply
(24:23):
here too. It's a silly reminder that definitely gets the
point across. I wanted to share this to thank you
and encourage you to and the work you're doing with
feeling things. I'm sure your message from this episode has
encouraged and will continue to encourage others as they go
through their own diagnosis. We got this and our bodies
are incredible. Sincerely, Emily, So I just wanted to read
(24:49):
that as encouragement to others, and then also thank Emily
for sharing this with us, and also so we can
be thinking of Emily and pray for her she navigates
this diagnosis and an upcoming hysterectomy.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
Did she say that she went into a normal, routine
appointment and then got a diagnosis of that?
Speaker 2 (25:11):
She just said. The reason I'm writing is because of
your latest episode. I went into my appointment this morning
thinking things were going to be normal, but walked away
with a diagnosis and the fix for it. I guess
in a way because there is no cure is the hysterectomy,
So that is a lot to process.
Speaker 1 (25:32):
And I also like your energy.
Speaker 2 (25:35):
Yes, I think you have some beautiful look on it.
And I love that you and your friends say that
to each other because that is such a good statement
of like, hey, don't talk about my friend that way,
because you would the way we talk to ourselves, we
would not like let our friends.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
It also is different than being like, don't be so
hard on yourself. It's like, hey, don't say that. That's rude, Like,
don't say about that person that I love. It also
made me think of just how we talked about last week.
I think the above the line and below the line,
and she's very very above the line right now. And
that's something that I since we've talked about it, have
been trying to implement more in my life, is being
(26:14):
very aware when I'm being above and below and trying
to bring myself above when I can. So she's doing
it naturally.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
Yeah, So thank you Emily for that email.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
Kat.
Speaker 4 (26:25):
Speaking of like above the line.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
I also want to say something about Emily's email from
the beginning where she said straight away a long time listener, pause, pause,
pauseer and first time emailer. The pause pause pauser made
me smile.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
Yeah, who knew that people were going to actually use that?
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Yeah, like pause, pause, pause, pause, And I think, yeah,
her attitude is amazing with this, and I think the
ability to pause, pause, pause, even though we have talked
about that in terms of like, if you're receiving a compliment, pause, pause, pause,
thank you, but it can be if you're receiving unexpected
(27:14):
news pause pause, pause, take it in. How do you
want to move forward with this information? And you may
have a moment where you need to like scream and
cry and question and do all of that jazz too,
and then you can pause, pause, pause and choose how
you want to move forward. And you know, she referenced
a recent episode we did when life feels like a lot,
(27:37):
and this is the time in your life where it's
a lot. This is feeling like a lot, and you
already are on a great track. And in fact, your
email is going to be encouragement to other people who
are getting news right now that they don't want and
how are they going to talk to themselves? And how
are they going to talk to their body? And how
are they going to handle it during a difficult time.
So thank you Emily for taking the time to us,
(28:01):
and we'll be thinking of you for sure, and keep
us posted and I guess we'll we'll end on that note.
We appreciate y'all emailing in always. You can hit us up,
whether you have something to share, like Emily, or you've
got a question like anonymous. Hey there at feelingthingspodcast dot com,
ding ding ding, But if you email us, it's either
(28:24):
Caat reading it, me reading it, or Shannon reading it.
Or if you send us a voicemail too. Oh we
love voicemails. For Christmas, I want voicemails. Okay, not people
saying Merry Christmas or anything like that, but like twenty twenty,
like if you've got like just challenge yourself and I
get it. And we've even heard this from callers or
(28:44):
voicemailers in BETHFIELDEAD they call them writer inners writer inners. Yeah,
like if you write in or call in, so caller inners,
voicemail or inners, I get that it is weird. And
that's what y'all expressed, like, Oh, it feels weird to
call and talk when you could just email and type
(29:05):
it because when you're behind a keyboard it is easier.
Speaker 1 (29:09):
But it's sometimes easier to explain something. That's why I've
been getting really into voice memos.
Speaker 2 (29:14):
Yeah, and you don't, but you don't need to make
them really long. It's just think of us like we're
this community and we're all hanging out, and when you
hear the person's voice, it just makes it that much
more of like a real connection because think of it
as a voice.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
You're sending us a voice memo, and our podcast is
a voicemento back to you. Yeah, we're texting.
Speaker 2 (29:38):
Yeah, let's up our parasocial relationships.
Speaker 1 (29:41):
Yeah, but then also countries that's dead.
Speaker 2 (29:47):
So yeah, the phone number for that is eight seven seven,
two oh seven, two oh seven seven, and just do
what you want. But I love too the Emily's like
first time emailer because I know there's so many of
you that, yeah, have wanted to reach out and then
do it cool. Do it it's cool. Cool, We think
(30:09):
it's cool. So just know when I was a fan
of the Bobby Bone Show, I called in twice and
then show it all worked out. Okay, so yeah, it's
not Christmas one more week, but wherever you are and
whatever you're doing today.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
Have the day you need to have.
Speaker 4 (30:29):
Bye.
Speaker 1 (30:29):
Bye,
Good.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
All right, break it down.
Speaker 3 (00:05):
If you ever have feelings that you just falls home
maybe and cat gotcha coviing like likeing, no, brother ladies
and polos.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
We just follow an the.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Spirit where it's all the front.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Over real stuff to the chill stuff and the m
but Swayne, sometimes the best thing you can do it
just stop you feel things.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
This is feeling things with Amy and Kat. Okay, Happy Thursday, everybody.
It is December eighteenth. Hi, Amy, I've got and we're
just gonna we're adding this at the beginning. It's a
little disclaimer that Kat and I, halfway through the recording
this episode realize it's not Christmas. We realized this episode
(00:49):
is December eighteenth, a full week before Christmas. But we're
gonna go ahead and leave all our Christmas talk in
it because it was the beginning, and so next week
we'll do it again for a real Christmas. But this
is just a disclaimer saying, you know, it's not Christmas.
I don't anybody freaking out gosh driving to work Christmas.
(01:14):
Did Christmas get moved to the eighteenth. No, it's always
on the twenty fifth, so always always, like you know,
so yeah it is. It's not Christmas, and you'll hear
us in real time discover that it's not Christmas.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
Okay, good for you.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
So yeah, here you go. Happy Thursday, Happy Thursday, and
Merry Christmas.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
Merry Christmas.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
He Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas, and happy Holidays from Amy
and Cat. How welcome to couch talks.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
I'm not gonna give a disclaimer today.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
I was at your Christmas cap to us, but we
actually I have an email that's got a little bit
of drama, so we might need the disclaimer. Give it
at the end to.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Be a rebel. Okay, ooh ooh.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
Yeah, what if I give it as a gift?
Speaker 1 (02:10):
You think they'll like it better if you say it.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
So Kat is a therapist and she's gonna give advice
after I read the email, but you need to take
it with a grain of salt because she doesn't have
all your history and she's not your actual therapist. So
this is not a replacement for therapy. This is just
two girls talking about your problems.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Yours is way longer than mine.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
Yeah, but it had a vibe.
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
We hope wherever y'all are on this day of December
twenty fifth, twenty twenty five that you are feeling loved
and safe and happy and with family maybe, but if
you're not, you're with us, and we're like, we'll be
your family right now, you're feeling things family. I saw this.
It's better as a graphic, so you kind of have
(02:54):
to imagine it. I see it posted every holiday season,
but it's a holiday to do list. That's not what
you think. I feel like I've even talked about on
the podcast, probably four things back in the day at
some point. But you know, at the top of the
list of your holiday to do list is like buy presence,
and sure that needs to get done. So it's not
necessarily a below the line thing, but the like above
(03:16):
the line thing is to scratch out the word by
and then scratch out the s on presence, so instead
of buy presence, you turn it into be present, like
be present with your people. Like it's like a play
on words. See if you look at it, how you
see what I'm doing. So we're gonna do our best
to describe this to people.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Okay, And I was like, if you scratch out by,
it doesn't spell B. You put the you put the.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Word Sorry I didn't say that part, but it's like
a holiday to do list, Like that's edited to be
above the line because that's what really matters this season.
I mean, sure, we do the whole gift thing, but
what really matters is not buying presence but being present.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
Yeah, and I will say I enjoy buying presents, so
I would edit that to be present while you're buying
presents because I can also get well, I can.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
That is so above above a buffal line.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
I love it. Well, I can get like tangled up
in the like getting the perfect gift, and so then
I feel paralyzed and I don't buy anything and I
overthink it. But like, I like buying presents, and so
I need to just be present while I'm doing it
and enjoy it versus like make it into something that
it's not.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Yeah, be present while buying present. Why did we do
it's not Christmas? At the beginning of the episode? Did
I act like it was Christmas? Because it's not. Okay,
so yeah, it's not. It's not Christmas. Like I'm doing
the holiday to do list, and I'm like, you know,
it came to me because I'm like, wait a second,
(04:42):
people aren't buying or presents anymore because today's Christmas, like
we should have done this holiday to do list a
week ago. And then I'm like, wait a second.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Well, you know what's interesting is you were looking at
me with a weird face, and I thought you were
like telling me to stop talking about it. Okay, we
get it.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
No, I was that was my thinking face of like, yeah,
what is the date? Because the next thing after be
present after you edit by presence is wrap presence, and
you edit that one to say wrap others in love.
Speaker 1 (05:17):
I thought you would say wrap yourself in a blanket.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
Okay, you can do that too, And then I thought,
like my brain was thinking, like is anybody be wrapping presents?
It's already Christmas.
Speaker 1 (05:27):
Hopefully you've wrapped your presence.
Speaker 2 (05:29):
Yeah, so instead of wrapping presents, you wrap others in
love or yourself in a blanket. The third one is
send cards. What do you think you edit that one
to be.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Send love close.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
It could be that it's they changed it to peace,
but yeah, send love, send peace, send hopes, en joy,
send nudes. Just kidding, don't.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
Don't do that.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
Unless you don't do that, sorry, I've already lost it.
The fourth one is shop for food. It's been edited
shop for friends. Don't shop for friends. No, no, no,
you you cross out shop four and it's change it
(06:18):
to donate, So donate food.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
My brain wasn't thinking.
Speaker 2 (06:23):
And the fifth one is make cookies, hold.
Speaker 1 (06:25):
On, make babies that might happen to make cookies, make friendship,
make laughter, make family time.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
Make time for yourself. Oho a selfish And then the
final one is see the lights.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
Be the light.
Speaker 2 (06:54):
Yes, boom, you nailed that line, so above the line,
love the line. I love the line. You nailed it. Okay,
that's your holiday to do list.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
Thanks for.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
One week, one more week until Christmas.
Speaker 1 (07:08):
Lucky you, you have one more week till Christmas.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
Merry Christmas.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
Happy. So I take back not doing the disclaimer. Can
I do it at the end. I'm just kidding.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
That was our gift to people.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
Yeah, it's not Christmas. I don't really owe them anything.
Speaker 2 (07:24):
Yeah, well we did give some advice. You can do
do your official disclaimer here if you want to. It
was like talking about it now I think they get it.
What do you have to do in this final week before?
Speaker 1 (07:35):
Nothing? Really like you have to be the light. I
do need to make some cookies to give to people,
but I'm all shopped out. I am all wrapped up too.
I love to wrap my gifts early so I can
see them under the tree. Yeah, it's nice.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
It is nice. I have my decoy presence under the
tree right now. They're just empty boxes that are wrapped,
so right when you put up your tree, you have
presence under there.
Speaker 1 (08:06):
Really smart because when you had smaller children, would you
wrap every present like Christmas Eve? If they go to
bed and then you wrap all the gifts, Like, how
did you do that?
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Yeah? But then also Santa shows.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
Up with you don't wrap Santa's presence.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
Yeah, Santa shows up with them, bring Santa.
Speaker 1 (08:27):
Yes, so you don't have to do that. Yeah, I
got it. So the gifts that you were giving people,
were you?
Speaker 2 (08:36):
I mean, I am such a last minute person. I
was wrapping them last minute?
Speaker 1 (08:39):
Well, because I feel like I would.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
I Well, to be honest, we spent most of our
Christmases in Colorado, and I would travel with them. I
would travel with them unwrapped. And then why because I
was taking them to Colorado and my sister has wrapping
paper like sister was really good at rapping. Well, I
(09:02):
would just borrow her wrapping paper like she would have
the tape, the scissors, the bows, the wrapping paper, and
like cute because she always has an esthetic for the year.
And she's the older sister and I'm the younger one,
and so I just feel like this is what we
do here. It comes amy but the yeah, I know,
I'm sure she was like, yes I have tape, Yes
I have ribbon.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Okay, well, I just wonder that, like do parents or people,
what am I going to be like it's a mom,
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (09:30):
Are you going to do Elf on the Shelf?
Speaker 1 (09:32):
No? No, no, no, no, absolutely no. But I do
want to validate anybody who chooses to do that, that
is great. I am one of those people. I just
listened to a two hour podcast on Elf on the Shelf.
That's how why I just felt really strongly, why are
you looking at me like that?
Speaker 2 (09:49):
A two hour podcast on elf on the show?
Speaker 1 (09:52):
It was be there in five Kay Kennedy.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
Her podcasts are long, awesome, Yeah, yeah, it's her, just.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
Like they're meant to just keep you company. So she
just rambles about it and she read a lot of
like listener emails and stuff about their experience with it.
And my takeaway is, and I know myself. So that's
why I'm saying no, is that once you start it also.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
Once it gets started by the elves.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Well, you adopt the elf, you can adopt the elf
them you can adopt the elf. Once you adopt the elf,
the elf isn't leaving. So I know, once I start something,
I want it to be the best experience that it
can be, and so I will get to ahead of
myself and then I'll have to keep up with it.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
Yeah, I never did it.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
I'm trying to.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
We never adopted it. I never. We never didn't want
to join our family.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
Well, not all families need them, is how that is?
Speaker 2 (10:46):
That?
Speaker 1 (10:47):
How said all the family needs the elf to because
the elf is there to it's surveillance. It's watching and
making sure that you're good. Not all families need an
extra surveillance to then let santano if you're OWD it's
been good or bad.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
Oh, I didn't realize the point of.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
It, which I don't know that. I think some families
elves can do different things because some people adopt the
elves that don't need surveillance, I suppose, But that's the
original I need you guys, anybody who's like interested in
this my thoughts, my actual thoughts. Go listen to that podcast.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
It's it's like a deep dive.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
It's a deep dive. It's also like nonsense, so like
it's not like that big of a deal. But I
after listening to that, I was like, I don't think
that our family will need this, you know what.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
I feel like we need to talk about which we
haven't talked about, and we're not gonna be able to
talk about it now, but eventually, because it's not we're
not done. So maybe once it's done, we need to
talk about Beth's Dead.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
Oh my god. Yeah, yeah, okay, great, thank you for
bringing this up. Everybody, go listen to it.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Yeah, go listen to Beth's Dead, so we can have
someone that told me to listen to it. And then
I talked about it on the Bobby Bone Show, and
then so many listeners started listening to it and they
were deeming me, They're like, thank you so much for
recommending this podcast. I cannot stop listening.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
So good. I put it in our newsletter last week
as a recommendation too.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
So yeah, so if you're and if you got our newsletter,
you're already in the know.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
You're already in the know. It's for anybody who's like, ah,
another podcast. It's short, so it's a limited series. It's
ten episodes, only eight or out right now, and they're short,
like some of them are thirty minutes long. I binged
it in a day and a half, so you can
catch up with us, and then once in two weeks
all of them should be out.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
You can buy their Patreon and listen to all of it.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
But I'm not doing that, so in two weeks we
can talk about it all together.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
It yeah, and we'll dive further into this because we
have emails, Like, we have some emails we're going to
go over. I have one from anonymous and another one
from Emily.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
Wait, totally think that.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Why can't I say that?
Speaker 1 (12:40):
What if? Oh yeah, listen to the I can't.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
Say that, Houston Beep, that be what I just said. Yeah,
I don't want to give anything away from Beth's stead,
I will say after listening to that, though, I have
so many questions about sometimes who or what is happening
with our correspondence with our listeners, whether it's emails from
the podcast or the Bobby Bone Show over twenty years.
(13:07):
I mean, I know for a fact. I mean, I've
had We've had weird things that have happened to us
like this. One listener of ours had a job where
she had access to government information. I don't want to
say too much because back in the day, the FBI
did get involved, but oh my gosh, we all had
to meet with agents because we all got not hacked
(13:27):
in our own stuff, but in our government. Like there's
a government database. Let's say, when you work at a
certain level, you can access information about people. Well, she
worked there, but she didn't have clearance to go in
and look up all the people that she looked up.
She looked up everybody on the show, starting with Bobby,
and then she looked up my stuff and then lunchboxes.
(13:48):
And this is back when we were in pop and
this is not the same thing, but it's like this
weird where we knew exactly who she was like when
the police came, when the FBI came to be, I
was like, oh, I know exactly who that is like.
And I had no idea she would ever do anything
like that. But I had seen her at multiple events.
I knew a lot about her. I sat next to
(14:10):
her at things.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
Yeah, did they come to you first, or did you
guys report something.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
No, they came to us because they were flagged because
she ended up losing her job because when she accessed
things she didn't have clearance for it, flagged something internally,
and then they did an investigation in her, like why
was she looking at these people and what's their relation?
And then they started researching all of us. They're like, wait,
(14:35):
all these people work together. Oh wait, this is a
morning show. Oh wait. And she had a lot of
our personal information. And they asked if we wanted to
press charges, and what do you think I.
Speaker 1 (14:47):
Said, no, you're afraid of retaliation.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Ding ding ding ding.
Speaker 1 (14:51):
This has been going this sphere has been happening for
a long time. Yeah, have you ever heard her? Seen
her again? Okay?
Speaker 2 (14:57):
Wow? Yeah, But then we moved so and then so
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (15:01):
Oh my gosh. The fact that this was back in
the day before you guys were like super super big.
Speaker 2 (15:06):
Yeah. I know. I lived in North Carolina at the time,
so we were probably syndicated in maybe like thirty or
forty markets. But now it's also syndication is so different now.
It was a really big deal to be syndicated back then.
But now everything can be people. Can you set up
a microphone in your bedroom and you can access the
whole world? Syndication is so different. But yeah, when we
(15:27):
first came to Nashville, it was like, oh yeah, we
were going to be in one hundred markets and then
two hundred markets and it was a really big deal.
And then now it's like cool, so Sally, so Sally
at her mom's house. Dang it, you know, which is
cool for Sally.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
That's really great for Sally.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
Yeah, so that was something that was a scary listener moment.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
What makes me wonder how often this happens to people
in general? And yeah, I don't want to give anything
away to go listen to it, and then what a
recap episode that's dead.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
Okay, so speing of listeners, let's get into our first
email and out of the gate, she's saying to be anonymous.
Son don't have her name, but here we go, So
(16:27):
this emailer would like to remain anonymous. Out of the gate,
she said that I would like to remain anonymous. Exclamation
was what she wants. Yeah, love you both the podcast
and the rebrand. I have a fairly new friendship with
a coworker. We started working together last August and became
close pretty quickly. Our kids are close and I really
(16:47):
adore her children. This year, I stepped into a leadership role,
which technically makes me her supervisor. Recently, though, I've noticed
her making comments that feel a little backhanded or subtle
put downs, especially in front of others. For example, we
were talking with a younger person and I said I
still feel like I'm in my twenties. She immediately responded with, well,
(17:12):
it's all the botox, which caught me off guard and
made me feel awful. The person we were talking to
didn't know me well, so bringing up my bowtox felt rude, unnecessary,
and embarrassing. Another example, I just got glasses for the
first time, and I chose a colorful pair because I
don't have to wear them all the time and thought
it would be fun. I'm still adjusting to how they
(17:33):
look on me. Instead of encouraging me, she said why
did you pick those? You should have gotten a solid color,
and then even sent me links to ones she thought
I should have bought. She also made little comments about
my clothes, and honestly, she sometimes just makes me feel
bad and insecure about myself. My mom thinks she's jealous,
but I'm not sure if that's just what moms say.
(17:56):
I hate that I'm stressing about this as a woman
in my thirties, but here I am, am I overreacting?
Speaker 1 (18:04):
So do you want to give feedback or can I
just go into this any thoughts as you were reading it?
Speaker 2 (18:09):
Well, I just read it, so you share your thoughts.
Speaker 1 (18:11):
So first her question is just am I overreacting? Right?
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Correct? Well, and her mom's point of she's just jealous?
Speaker 1 (18:19):
Okay, Well there's no way for us to know. I'm
gonna put that out first. As I was reading that,
I did have at first like a reaction of like
the botox comment, like a little whoa interesting thing to say.
And then right after that, I was like, well, maybe
she was trying to be funny or just like there
is a sense of passive aggressiveness. And at the same time,
(18:41):
I don't know this person, so it could just be
her humor or like how she is with the glasses.
She could be passive aggressive, or she could be really
trying to help, like, oh, you doesn't seem like you
like them? What made you pick those?
Speaker 2 (18:52):
So whoa it isn't she said she's trying to get
used to wearing the glasses. Okay, she just said you
should have gone with the solid color and then sent
her options, but like she already.
Speaker 1 (19:04):
Got there, passive aggressive. I think I'm trying to say, well,
I already bought these, okay, Like that's not helpful.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Yeah, it's not helpful.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
So I don't think that you're overreacting because your reaction
is this doesn't feel good. This reaction is like out
that hurt my feelings. Like, I don't think that can
be an overreaction. And we could sit here and make
up all these stories of like what did she mean
by that, why did she do it? That was weird?
Speaker 3 (19:27):
Or we could share with her that didn't feel good
when you said that. So that simple and that will
solve it. I mean, she's also now in a place
of being.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
She's a ross. Yeah. I wonder if this happened before
she did this happen.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
It seems like she got promoted and then this started already.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
Happening, So there could be you could even say this
is just an idea. She makes a comment and you say,
you know what, I'm just curious. It feels like the
vibe is off between us, like you've made a couple
of comments like the one that you just made. It
hurt my feelings and I just I don't know what's
going on. It feels like something has changed recently, and
you can just ask about that, and it doesn't have
to be let me call you into my office and
(20:07):
sit down, put a meeting on your schedule, and have
this big come to Jesus. It can just be like,
it feels like the vibe has been off lately. Is
there something going on that I need to know about?
And it opens the door up for her to be like, no,
what are you talking about? Or actually, yeah, I have
been feeling a little weird I have been making I mean,
I don't know that she's going to come out and
say I've been making these comments, but it opens the
(20:29):
door to have that back and forth. And then if
she's like, what are you talking about? Then you can
say with the other day, you know how you said
that I feel young because of my botox in front
of our colleague. That just felt really odd and didn't
make me feel really good, and I didn't know if
there was something behind that.
Speaker 2 (20:44):
And then also botox seems like a person thing, like
sometimes you may be open and talk about it, and
other times you may not publicly proclaim to your other
co workers that you have.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
I will say, if you don't say anything about this,
I would be led to believe that she's going to
keep making these comments because it almost is like you're
co signing them, like she's getting away with it, you know.
So it feels like, fine.
Speaker 2 (21:09):
What about our script that when you so you dialogue script?
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Yeah, and I think when you use that that does
make it a little bit more serious. So just be
prepared that you're using these words when you blank. I
felt blank. The story I made up was blank. What
I need is blank, And so that might feel more
I'm trying to give I guess I'm trying to give
her like a lower conflict way to approach that of
like the vibe has been off. But if it doesn't
(21:33):
feel like that's doing the trick, then yes, pull that script.
And if this is she said, it's a new friend.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
Well, she said when they first started working together, they
became fast friends. She said, it's a fairly new friendship
with a coworker. And they started working together last August,
so they did bond pretty quickly. But then this year
she stepped into a leadership role. So I would say
maybe they've been friends for like a year and then
she slipped into the leadership role. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:59):
If if she says another comment like that, I would
encourage you use the script. If she doesn't and this
is just wearing on you, I would bring up the
vibe has felt off and she's like, what are you
talking about? Then you use the script to describe it.
So yeah, that works.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
I have another email from a listener Emily, which by
the way, to anonymous not to just move on so quickly,
but we hope that this works out. You can send
us an update let us know how it goes. Anybody
else listening, you may not be in this exact situation,
but you might be dealing with someone that makes comments,
it has made comments, and maybe you just need to
have a conversation. So hopefully that was hopeful for y'all too.
(22:35):
This email is from Emily, Hey, Amy and Kat, longtime
listener Pause Pause pauser and first time emailer Smiley Face.
I wanted to drop in and first say thank you
for your encouraging podcasts. I love listening to you chat
your advice and it's a pleasure to witness audibly. Lol,
your friendship grow. You guys remind me of my best
(22:57):
friend and I. The reason I'm writing is because of
your latest episode when life feels like a lot. I
went into my appointment this morning thinking things were going
to be normal, but walked away with a diagnosis of
and I might butcher what this is because when I
first read it, just my brain automatically read endometriosis. But
(23:18):
that's not it. It is a dinomiosis, a dnomiosis that
feels like it could be a word, a dinomiosis, and
an understanding that I will need a hysterectomy. And she
just said as a note, I am in my early thirties.
I'm honestly still processing it all. But I truly believe
(23:40):
it was the Lord's timing that this podcast episode came
out the day that it did. While tears were certainly shed,
I definitely needed the reminder to treat my body with
kindness and thank it for the hard work it's doing.
There is no cure for a dinomiosis, and there is
no known reason as to why it happens, so one
(24:02):
can easily look inward and be critical. However, I am
choosing to love my body, especially in this difficult time
and give myself grace too when it gets hard. Something
my best friend and I say when we hear the
other talk negatively about ourselves is hey, don't talk about
my friend like that, And I think that could apply
(24:23):
here too. It's a silly reminder that definitely gets the
point across. I wanted to share this to thank you
and encourage you to and the work you're doing with
feeling things. I'm sure your message from this episode has
encouraged and will continue to encourage others as they go
through their own diagnosis. We got this and our bodies
are incredible. Sincerely, Emily, So I just wanted to read
(24:49):
that as encouragement to others, and then also thank Emily
for sharing this with us, and also so we can
be thinking of Emily and pray for her she navigates
this diagnosis and an upcoming hysterectomy.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
Did she say that she went into a normal, routine
appointment and then got a diagnosis of that?
Speaker 2 (25:11):
She just said. The reason I'm writing is because of
your latest episode. I went into my appointment this morning
thinking things were going to be normal, but walked away
with a diagnosis and the fix for it. I guess
in a way because there is no cure is the hysterectomy,
So that is a lot to process.
Speaker 1 (25:32):
And I also like your energy.
Speaker 2 (25:35):
Yes, I think you have some beautiful look on it.
And I love that you and your friends say that
to each other because that is such a good statement
of like, hey, don't talk about my friend that way,
because you would the way we talk to ourselves, we
would not like let our friends.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
It also is different than being like, don't be so
hard on yourself. It's like, hey, don't say that. That's rude, Like,
don't say about that person that I love. It also
made me think of just how we talked about last week.
I think the above the line and below the line,
and she's very very above the line right now. And
that's something that I since we've talked about it, have
been trying to implement more in my life, is being
(26:14):
very aware when I'm being above and below and trying
to bring myself above when I can. So she's doing
it naturally.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
Yeah, So thank you Emily for that email.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
Kat.
Speaker 4 (26:25):
Speaking of like above the line.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
I also want to say something about Emily's email from
the beginning where she said straight away a long time listener, pause, pause,
pauseer and first time emailer. The pause pause pauser made
me smile.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
Yeah, who knew that people were going to actually use that?
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Yeah, like pause, pause, pause, pause, And I think, yeah,
her attitude is amazing with this, and I think the
ability to pause, pause, pause, even though we have talked
about that in terms of like, if you're receiving a compliment, pause, pause, pause,
thank you, but it can be if you're receiving unexpected
(27:14):
news pause pause, pause, take it in. How do you
want to move forward with this information? And you may
have a moment where you need to like scream and
cry and question and do all of that jazz too,
and then you can pause, pause, pause and choose how
you want to move forward. And you know, she referenced
a recent episode we did when life feels like a lot,
(27:37):
and this is the time in your life where it's
a lot. This is feeling like a lot, and you
already are on a great track. And in fact, your
email is going to be encouragement to other people who
are getting news right now that they don't want and
how are they going to talk to themselves? And how
are they going to talk to their body? And how
are they going to handle it during a difficult time.
So thank you Emily for taking the time to us,
(28:01):
and we'll be thinking of you for sure, and keep
us posted and I guess we'll we'll end on that note.
We appreciate y'all emailing in always. You can hit us up,
whether you have something to share, like Emily, or you've
got a question like anonymous. Hey there at feelingthingspodcast dot com,
ding ding ding, But if you email us, it's either
(28:24):
Caat reading it, me reading it, or Shannon reading it.
Or if you send us a voicemail too. Oh we
love voicemails. For Christmas, I want voicemails. Okay, not people
saying Merry Christmas or anything like that, but like twenty twenty,
like if you've got like just challenge yourself and I
get it. And we've even heard this from callers or
(28:44):
voicemailers in BETHFIELDEAD they call them writer inners writer inners. Yeah,
like if you write in or call in, so caller inners,
voicemail or inners, I get that it is weird. And
that's what y'all expressed, like, Oh, it feels weird to
call and talk when you could just email and type
(29:05):
it because when you're behind a keyboard it is easier.
Speaker 1 (29:09):
But it's sometimes easier to explain something. That's why I've
been getting really into voice memos.
Speaker 2 (29:14):
Yeah, and you don't, but you don't need to make
them really long. It's just think of us like we're
this community and we're all hanging out, and when you
hear the person's voice, it just makes it that much
more of like a real connection because think of it
as a voice.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
You're sending us a voice memo, and our podcast is
a voicemento back to you. Yeah, we're texting.
Speaker 2 (29:38):
Yeah, let's up our parasocial relationships.
Speaker 1 (29:41):
Yeah, but then also countries that's dead.
Speaker 2 (29:47):
So yeah, the phone number for that is eight seven seven,
two oh seven, two oh seven seven, and just do
what you want. But I love too the Emily's like
first time emailer because I know there's so many of
you that, yeah, have wanted to reach out and then
do it cool. Do it it's cool. Cool, We think
(30:09):
it's cool. So just know when I was a fan
of the Bobby Bone Show, I called in twice and
then show it all worked out. Okay, so yeah, it's
not Christmas one more week, but wherever you are and
whatever you're doing today.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
Have the day you need to have.
Speaker 4 (30:29):
Bye.
Speaker 1 (30:29):
Bye,
Feeling Things with Amy & Kat News
Host
Amy Brown
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