November 6, 2025 • 13 mins
Amy and Kat share an email from Grace, a listener from Alaska who opens up about her recovery from an eating disorder and the struggle to let go of “perfect” routines. Grace’s story sparks an honest conversation about control, identity, and what it really means to live in recovery. Amy and Kat share what they would tell their younger selves and offer gentle reminders that healing isn’t about perfection, it’s about peace.
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HOSTS:
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Kat Van Buren // @KatVanburen
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Good.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
All right, break it down.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
If you ever have feelings that you just fons, I'm
Amy and Cat got you covin locking, No brother, ladies
and felts. Do you just follow an the spirit where
it's all the front over real stuff, tell the chill
stuff and the m but Swayne, sometimes the best thing
you can do it jes stop you feel things. This
(00:27):
is Feeling Things with Amy and Kat.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Happy Thursday, Welcome to Couch Talks, our Q and a
episode to the Feeling Things podcast.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
I'm Amy and I'm Kat.
Speaker 4 (00:36):
And quick disclaimer that although we're answering questions on couch Talks,
this does not serve as a substitute for actual mental
health services or therapy or therapy.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
Yeah, but this is a therapy podcast.
Speaker 5 (00:49):
Ish mental health minded.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
Oh yeah, that's right, that's what we say. I forget.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
This email is from a listener named Grace. Hey, Amy
and Kat. My name is Grace. I'm nineteen and living
a lots shout out.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
Oh that's so cool.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
Yeah, I want to go to Alaska bucket list. I've
been listening to four Things Outweigh and you need therapy
for about five years after finding you through the Bobby
Bone Show. I was so happy to see the new
feeling things podcasts bless my feed First, thank you. I've
heard you both say that sometimes it feels like you're
just talking to yourselves, wondering if it's making a difference. Well,
I'm living proof that it is. In eighth grade, just
(01:26):
before COVID, I fell into a dark hole and needing
disorder and exercise addiction took over my life and I
felt unbearably alone. Then I found your podcasts. I'll never
forget the shock of realizing you got it. Listening made
me feel seen, understood, and validated. You reminded me that
recovery was possible.
Speaker 3 (01:45):
So thank you. You truly changed my life for the better.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
I've thought about writing for years, and I'm reaching out
now because I'm at a bit of a low point.
I tore my meniscus and can't do the exercise I love.
Living on my own has also made it easier to
slip into old habits. I eat healthy and move my body,
but I notice strict routines and rules around food creeping
back in. When my routine is thrown off, I spiral.
(02:08):
I truly want recovery, but these habits feel healthy to me.
They feel perfect. What advice would you give to a
younger you on how to break out of perfect and
find real freedom with food. It's scary to let go
of control, but I want to live without the constant
noise in my head.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
Thanks again for being amazing human stuff feels weird for
me to read.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
Like those are Grace's words, But you know, sometimes you're
reading the email and then you're like, thank.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
You again for being amazing humans, and I'm like, thank you, Grace.
That's nice. Sometimes sometimes yeah, it feels weird too.
Speaker 5 (02:45):
Well.
Speaker 4 (02:46):
It also feels weird to like tell other people about
compliments that people give us.
Speaker 5 (02:49):
That's what Sometimes reading.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
It feels right right right right, So you know, I'm
just this is just me reading Grace's words.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
Thank you again for being good.
Speaker 5 (02:57):
You want to say it twice.
Speaker 3 (02:59):
Humans, even from Alaska.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
I feel like your two friends who always have my
back and keep me striving for freedom, joy and friendship.
Have the day you need to have smiley face, Grace.
Speaker 5 (03:09):
That's not a smiley face?
Speaker 3 (03:11):
What is it? What is that a heart?
Speaker 5 (03:14):
No?
Speaker 3 (03:14):
She did have the day you need to have smiley face?
Speaker 5 (03:17):
Oh then heart?
Speaker 3 (03:19):
Yeah than heart?
Speaker 5 (03:20):
Sorry?
Speaker 3 (03:20):
I thought I was like, what is that code for
something else. I felt like. I was like, no, that's
a culin parentheses.
Speaker 5 (03:26):
You don't know what that is.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
That is a smile, I thought, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
Sometimes it's like you younger people, you're like, any that
means something else.
Speaker 5 (03:35):
Yeah, I can't believe you said that. Yeah, no, no, I
just was reading ahead.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
This is cool that Grace has been such an avid
listener for so long, and you know, when I hear
her say like I want to live without the constant
noise in my head, it makes me think of our
friend Lisa, who I started Outweigh with, which Outweigh is
how I met Kat, which Outweigh was a series and
now it's his own podcast, but it was a series
(03:58):
on my four Things podcast because life without disordered eating
outweighs everything, like if you can figure out how to,
it's like the freedom that comes with that, and it's
supposed to just be this four part thing that Kat
came on as a therapist on that episode. So shout
out to Outweigh because that's how we met. But Lisa
had a program called Fork the Noise, and she had
(04:20):
that name because it was literally like sticking a fork
in the noise and shutting it.
Speaker 3 (04:25):
Down, shut it down, shut it down.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
You know, we talked on Tuesday's episode about recovery being
a process and you're never fully recovered. Like people don't
go around saying, oh, yeah, I'm recovered from that. They
say I'm in recovery from that. And that's where Grace is,
and she's in a season of things creeping back in
and naturally, being on your own, it's easier to.
Speaker 3 (04:52):
Yeah, to let that stuff happen, and where.
Speaker 4 (04:56):
She says, what advice would you give to a younger
you on how to break out of perfect and find
real freedom with food? Great question. I love that kind
of question of looking back at your younger you. My
stipulation with that question is you're never going to find
forever perfect freedom. So even in that it's like perfectionism, right,
So I would reframe that of like, what would you
(05:18):
advice would you give to a younger you to break
free from the perfection and have more freedom in general
versus not have have perfect freedom?
Speaker 5 (05:27):
If that makes sense. I think that.
Speaker 2 (05:29):
I love that you're saying that too, because it's also
putting us in a like we're two people that are
in recovery, right, Yes, and there are things we have
to say to ourselves in the now in the press,
Like we don't say it to our younger selves because
we haven't reached some final destination, right, So we're still
saying stuff to ourselves.
Speaker 4 (05:48):
Yeah, So I'm going to answer this for me, and
I'm interested to hear what you would say.
Speaker 5 (05:52):
But if I could look back at.
Speaker 4 (05:53):
The version of me that was in the probably deepest depths,
I would And this is I have to get this caveat.
I don't know how much she would believe me, So
this is what I would want to say. But sometimes
it's hard for me to answer that question because I
don't know how much she would believe me because of
where I was, and when you're in that place, your
brain is not healthy, and so I might be like
(06:17):
you liar, or it would be so hard for me
to really believe this. But I would say, there is
so much more to you, and there are so many
more things that people care about when it comes to
you than what you look like, your workout routine, how
much you can accomplish, Like that's not the reason people
(06:37):
are friends with you. There's other reasons people want to
be around you. It's not the reason that your family
loves you. That's what I would say. I also have
a rebuttal from my younger self that I know that
I would say back, and.
Speaker 5 (06:48):
So I say that part because it's easier said than done.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
Like I wish I could turn this the hindsight into foresight,
if that makes sense, Like I wish I could go
back at sixteen and be able to see that the
hindsight and that be my foresight. But when you're in it,
that stuff really feels like that is why.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
Well and grace, I want to point out too, like
you're nineteen, yeah, so your brain isn't even fully developed, you.
Speaker 5 (07:14):
Feel Andre maure.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
I mean that in a really kind way, like you
sound more mature than I was at nineteen, So maybe
you're developing faster then most, but look forward to that
and know that, like I think even having that awareness
of like, oh yeah, I'm nineteen, just having that perspective
of my brain's not gonna be fully developed till twenty five,
(07:37):
so give it some grace, give it some time. But
that doesn't mean for the next five years or once
it is developed at twenty five, that you're going to
have it figured out. That's not what that means it's
just I don't know. Things make more sense once that
frontal cortex is complete.
Speaker 4 (07:52):
Yeah, And you know, it's one of those things where
like in any scenario when you're not there yet, it's
hard for you to like see the light at the
end of the tunnel. I wish I had this is
here's a way for me to answer this question better,
because I feel like that answer didn't really give much
hope what I wish I would have.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
You're like, but I know younger me, and i'd been like, screwye,
because I get the.
Speaker 4 (08:10):
Other It's just like one of those like platitudes that
people say you know totally, and that can become annoying
to hear over and over when it's like you don't
understand that.
Speaker 5 (08:18):
Like sometimes it really does feel like what I look.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
Like and what I can accomplish is why people are
around me what I wish I would have done.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
Or what I wish I had access to that I.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
Didn't, And part of it is because I suffered in silence,
like nobody really knew. I mean, I'm sure they could.
I'm sure people were like, what's going on with her?
But I didn't talk about it, and I wish that
I would have sought out or knew somebody who had
experienced something similar to me and was on the other
side of it. I think recovery stories would have given
(08:47):
me hope. So that's why I'm glad that she found
the podcast, not just to find us, but because there
you had so many people on that podcast that told
their stories and told their stories of hope and shared
that and it's like, I don't have to take this
from me, I can see it.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
I think that was what was so impactful for her,
because she even said she was like, I'll never forget
the shock of realizing like you guys get it, Yeah,
you got it. Like she felt seen and understood. And
you know, Kat and I interviewed Donald Miller a while back,
and he gave us that question of what does this
make possible?
Speaker 5 (09:20):
Or what big thing is this preparing me for? Yeah,
well there.
Speaker 3 (09:23):
Could be that.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
And then I'm thinking more of her meniscus situation right
now of what does this now make possible? Because sometimes
you can be focused on well, now I can't do
the workouts that I want to do. Okay, Well, how
can you ask yourself in a different question because there's
been country artists that have come in on the Bobby
Bone Show where it's like they're blowing up and they're
like superstars and whatever, and it's like, well, how do
(09:44):
you even pick up the guitar?
Speaker 3 (09:46):
Get into this?
Speaker 2 (09:46):
And they're like, well, I was playing football and it
broke my leg and my arm and then I wasn't able,
you know, so I don't know I could kind of sing,
so then I started playing around with the guitar and
next thing, you know.
Speaker 5 (09:57):
Like thank god I broke my leg. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:59):
Right, I'm using that as like an example, not that
you're trying to be a country star, but how can
you use this time that you have with this limitation?
You can't go do the workout you want to do.
How can you exercise your brain in a different way?
And maybe it's not about your body. Is there another
activity you can do? Can you take an art class?
(10:19):
Do you like to draw? Can you where's the meniscus
in your knee?
Speaker 3 (10:24):
Okay? Because I'm like, wait, okay, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (10:29):
I've never now that you say that, I know, well,
now that makes sense because I've heard people say like, oh,
acl meniscus TLC.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
No, that's a show that's also a big channel.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
Yeah, oh TLC oh yeah, but also is the TV
station Trading spaces.
Speaker 5 (10:45):
Was on ADHD No.
Speaker 2 (10:48):
I think just asking yourself that question during the season,
Like that's the advice I have. I love what Kats
shared about going back I don't know, younger me like
I wish, I don't know. I just would want to
hugger and also shaker and be like, don't miss out
on memories, like that's the one thing. Like both my
mom and my dad have passed away, and I spent
so much time trying to not eat their food and
(11:11):
make family time complicated by bringing my own and altering recipes.
And even when I would host, like my nephews last Christmas,
like made some comment. They're like, remember that one thing's
giving beb hosted and she made us that vegan la
la la mac and cheese or whatever, which if you're
vegan and you have to do that, that's fine. But
I wasn't vegan, but I was trying to control and
I was making it gluten free, vegan loch like everything
(11:34):
about it. And they're like, I thought it kind of
tasted good, but that was my delusion. And I'm hosting
my family and years later, my nephews are like bringing
it up as a good laugh, and I can laugh
about it now, but I had no idea at the
time that they were all like, what.
Speaker 3 (11:49):
The heck is this?
Speaker 2 (11:50):
But I didn't care about them. I was just thinking
about myself, which is so incredibly selfish. But when you're
in an eating disorder like that, it can be selfish.
I have compassion for that version of me, but my
advice to be, like, stop trying to be the buzz
kill and soak up this time with your family. Yeah,
(12:11):
but to your point, Kat, it's like you can't see
through some of it. So I'm sure younger me would
be like.
Speaker 5 (12:16):
What not not the buzzkill? I brought the good cheese, kidd.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
My sugar free pecan pie is slamming.
Speaker 4 (12:22):
Well.
Speaker 5 (12:22):
I think about that with like my grandma is not.
Speaker 4 (12:25):
My grandma used to always make these like sugar cookies
and then the like peanut butter cookies with the hershy
kiss ye, and I didn't eat them for so long,
and it's like, well, I can't ever eat her cookies
again because she's gone. She mailed me a box of
those cookies in a shoe box to college and.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
What'd you do?
Speaker 5 (12:39):
Threw them out? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (12:41):
I probably would have. Yeah, thrown them out and then
made sure I wasn't gonna eat them. And it's like
sprayed windex on them, right And I would kill to
eat one right now?
Speaker 5 (12:48):
Yeah, And I don't have the recipe.
Speaker 3 (12:49):
She wouldn't literally kill, but yes I would.
Speaker 5 (12:52):
I was about to say I would die to eat one,
but that's the same thing. He'll eat one kill.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
You could go to jail.
Speaker 2 (12:59):
Okay, So all this to say, we hope this is helpful,
but I do challenge you to ask yourself that question
during the season of what does this injury now make
possible for me?
Speaker 3 (13:10):
Because maybe if.
Speaker 2 (13:11):
You open yourself up to those other opportunities that could
be quite therapeutic. Honestly, it may help you navigate some
of these other feelings around food and control. You know,
when you tap into other creative parts of your brain
and exercising, look at exercise differently. You Maybe I'll not
be able to take your body to the gym, but
can you take your brain to the gym? Ooh, drop
(13:32):
girls and on that boom grace. Thank you for the email,
Thanks for listening so long. Shout out to the mature brain.
At nineteen, I can tell you're on track. You're on
track to fully develop just fine, all right.
Speaker 3 (13:47):
I hope you have the day you need to have. Bye.
Speaker 4 (13:49):
Bye,
Good.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
All right, break it down.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
If you ever have feelings that you just fons, I'm
Amy and Cat got you covin locking, No brother, ladies
and felts. Do you just follow an the spirit where
it's all the front over real stuff, tell the chill
stuff and the m but Swayne, sometimes the best thing
you can do it jes stop you feel things. This
(00:27):
is Feeling Things with Amy and Kat.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Happy Thursday, Welcome to Couch Talks, our Q and a
episode to the Feeling Things podcast.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
I'm Amy and I'm Kat.
Speaker 4 (00:36):
And quick disclaimer that although we're answering questions on couch Talks,
this does not serve as a substitute for actual mental
health services or therapy or therapy.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
Yeah, but this is a therapy podcast.
Speaker 5 (00:49):
Ish mental health minded.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
Oh yeah, that's right, that's what we say. I forget.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
This email is from a listener named Grace. Hey, Amy
and Kat. My name is Grace. I'm nineteen and living
a lots shout out.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
Oh that's so cool.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
Yeah, I want to go to Alaska bucket list. I've
been listening to four Things Outweigh and you need therapy
for about five years after finding you through the Bobby
Bone Show. I was so happy to see the new
feeling things podcasts bless my feed First, thank you. I've
heard you both say that sometimes it feels like you're
just talking to yourselves, wondering if it's making a difference. Well,
I'm living proof that it is. In eighth grade, just
(01:26):
before COVID, I fell into a dark hole and needing
disorder and exercise addiction took over my life and I
felt unbearably alone. Then I found your podcasts. I'll never
forget the shock of realizing you got it. Listening made
me feel seen, understood, and validated. You reminded me that
recovery was possible.
Speaker 3 (01:45):
So thank you. You truly changed my life for the better.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
I've thought about writing for years, and I'm reaching out
now because I'm at a bit of a low point.
I tore my meniscus and can't do the exercise I love.
Living on my own has also made it easier to
slip into old habits. I eat healthy and move my body,
but I notice strict routines and rules around food creeping
back in. When my routine is thrown off, I spiral.
(02:08):
I truly want recovery, but these habits feel healthy to me.
They feel perfect. What advice would you give to a
younger you on how to break out of perfect and
find real freedom with food. It's scary to let go
of control, but I want to live without the constant
noise in my head.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
Thanks again for being amazing human stuff feels weird for
me to read.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
Like those are Grace's words, But you know, sometimes you're
reading the email and then you're like, thank.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
You again for being amazing humans, and I'm like, thank you, Grace.
That's nice. Sometimes sometimes yeah, it feels weird too.
Speaker 5 (02:45):
Well.
Speaker 4 (02:46):
It also feels weird to like tell other people about
compliments that people give us.
Speaker 5 (02:49):
That's what Sometimes reading.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
It feels right right right right, So you know, I'm
just this is just me reading Grace's words.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
Thank you again for being good.
Speaker 5 (02:57):
You want to say it twice.
Speaker 3 (02:59):
Humans, even from Alaska.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
I feel like your two friends who always have my
back and keep me striving for freedom, joy and friendship.
Have the day you need to have smiley face, Grace.
Speaker 5 (03:09):
That's not a smiley face?
Speaker 3 (03:11):
What is it? What is that a heart?
Speaker 5 (03:14):
No?
Speaker 3 (03:14):
She did have the day you need to have smiley face?
Speaker 5 (03:17):
Oh then heart?
Speaker 3 (03:19):
Yeah than heart?
Speaker 5 (03:20):
Sorry?
Speaker 3 (03:20):
I thought I was like, what is that code for
something else. I felt like. I was like, no, that's
a culin parentheses.
Speaker 5 (03:26):
You don't know what that is.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
That is a smile, I thought, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
Sometimes it's like you younger people, you're like, any that
means something else.
Speaker 5 (03:35):
Yeah, I can't believe you said that. Yeah, no, no, I
just was reading ahead.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
This is cool that Grace has been such an avid
listener for so long, and you know, when I hear
her say like I want to live without the constant
noise in my head, it makes me think of our
friend Lisa, who I started Outweigh with, which Outweigh is
how I met Kat, which Outweigh was a series and
now it's his own podcast, but it was a series
(03:58):
on my four Things podcast because life without disordered eating
outweighs everything, like if you can figure out how to,
it's like the freedom that comes with that, and it's
supposed to just be this four part thing that Kat
came on as a therapist on that episode. So shout
out to Outweigh because that's how we met. But Lisa
had a program called Fork the Noise, and she had
(04:20):
that name because it was literally like sticking a fork
in the noise and shutting it.
Speaker 3 (04:25):
Down, shut it down, shut it down.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
You know, we talked on Tuesday's episode about recovery being
a process and you're never fully recovered. Like people don't
go around saying, oh, yeah, I'm recovered from that. They
say I'm in recovery from that. And that's where Grace is,
and she's in a season of things creeping back in
and naturally, being on your own, it's easier to.
Speaker 3 (04:52):
Yeah, to let that stuff happen, and where.
Speaker 4 (04:56):
She says, what advice would you give to a younger
you on how to break out of perfect and find
real freedom with food? Great question. I love that kind
of question of looking back at your younger you. My
stipulation with that question is you're never going to find
forever perfect freedom. So even in that it's like perfectionism, right,
So I would reframe that of like, what would you
(05:18):
advice would you give to a younger you to break
free from the perfection and have more freedom in general
versus not have have perfect freedom?
Speaker 5 (05:27):
If that makes sense. I think that.
Speaker 2 (05:29):
I love that you're saying that too, because it's also
putting us in a like we're two people that are
in recovery, right, Yes, and there are things we have
to say to ourselves in the now in the press,
Like we don't say it to our younger selves because
we haven't reached some final destination, right, So we're still
saying stuff to ourselves.
Speaker 4 (05:48):
Yeah, So I'm going to answer this for me, and
I'm interested to hear what you would say.
Speaker 5 (05:52):
But if I could look back at.
Speaker 4 (05:53):
The version of me that was in the probably deepest depths,
I would And this is I have to get this caveat.
I don't know how much she would believe me, So
this is what I would want to say. But sometimes
it's hard for me to answer that question because I
don't know how much she would believe me because of
where I was, and when you're in that place, your
brain is not healthy, and so I might be like
(06:17):
you liar, or it would be so hard for me
to really believe this. But I would say, there is
so much more to you, and there are so many
more things that people care about when it comes to
you than what you look like, your workout routine, how
much you can accomplish, Like that's not the reason people
(06:37):
are friends with you. There's other reasons people want to
be around you. It's not the reason that your family
loves you. That's what I would say. I also have
a rebuttal from my younger self that I know that
I would say back, and.
Speaker 5 (06:48):
So I say that part because it's easier said than done.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
Like I wish I could turn this the hindsight into foresight,
if that makes sense, Like I wish I could go
back at sixteen and be able to see that the
hindsight and that be my foresight. But when you're in it,
that stuff really feels like that is why.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
Well and grace, I want to point out too, like
you're nineteen, yeah, so your brain isn't even fully developed, you.
Speaker 5 (07:14):
Feel Andre maure.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
I mean that in a really kind way, like you
sound more mature than I was at nineteen, So maybe
you're developing faster then most, but look forward to that
and know that, like I think even having that awareness
of like, oh yeah, I'm nineteen, just having that perspective
of my brain's not gonna be fully developed till twenty five,
(07:37):
so give it some grace, give it some time. But
that doesn't mean for the next five years or once
it is developed at twenty five, that you're going to
have it figured out. That's not what that means it's
just I don't know. Things make more sense once that
frontal cortex is complete.
Speaker 4 (07:52):
Yeah, And you know, it's one of those things where
like in any scenario when you're not there yet, it's
hard for you to like see the light at the
end of the tunnel. I wish I had this is
here's a way for me to answer this question better,
because I feel like that answer didn't really give much
hope what I wish I would have.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
You're like, but I know younger me, and i'd been like, screwye,
because I get the.
Speaker 4 (08:10):
Other It's just like one of those like platitudes that
people say you know totally, and that can become annoying
to hear over and over when it's like you don't
understand that.
Speaker 5 (08:18):
Like sometimes it really does feel like what I look.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
Like and what I can accomplish is why people are
around me what I wish I would have done.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
Or what I wish I had access to that I.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
Didn't, And part of it is because I suffered in silence,
like nobody really knew. I mean, I'm sure they could.
I'm sure people were like, what's going on with her?
But I didn't talk about it, and I wish that
I would have sought out or knew somebody who had
experienced something similar to me and was on the other
side of it. I think recovery stories would have given
(08:47):
me hope. So that's why I'm glad that she found
the podcast, not just to find us, but because there
you had so many people on that podcast that told
their stories and told their stories of hope and shared
that and it's like, I don't have to take this
from me, I can see it.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
I think that was what was so impactful for her,
because she even said she was like, I'll never forget
the shock of realizing like you guys get it, Yeah,
you got it. Like she felt seen and understood. And
you know, Kat and I interviewed Donald Miller a while back,
and he gave us that question of what does this
make possible?
Speaker 5 (09:20):
Or what big thing is this preparing me for? Yeah,
well there.
Speaker 3 (09:23):
Could be that.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
And then I'm thinking more of her meniscus situation right
now of what does this now make possible? Because sometimes
you can be focused on well, now I can't do
the workouts that I want to do. Okay, Well, how
can you ask yourself in a different question because there's
been country artists that have come in on the Bobby
Bone Show where it's like they're blowing up and they're
like superstars and whatever, and it's like, well, how do
(09:44):
you even pick up the guitar?
Speaker 3 (09:46):
Get into this?
Speaker 2 (09:46):
And they're like, well, I was playing football and it
broke my leg and my arm and then I wasn't able,
you know, so I don't know I could kind of sing,
so then I started playing around with the guitar and
next thing, you know.
Speaker 5 (09:57):
Like thank god I broke my leg. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:59):
Right, I'm using that as like an example, not that
you're trying to be a country star, but how can
you use this time that you have with this limitation?
You can't go do the workout you want to do.
How can you exercise your brain in a different way?
And maybe it's not about your body. Is there another
activity you can do? Can you take an art class?
(10:19):
Do you like to draw? Can you where's the meniscus
in your knee?
Speaker 3 (10:24):
Okay? Because I'm like, wait, okay, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (10:29):
I've never now that you say that, I know, well,
now that makes sense because I've heard people say like, oh,
acl meniscus TLC.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
No, that's a show that's also a big channel.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
Yeah, oh TLC oh yeah, but also is the TV
station Trading spaces.
Speaker 5 (10:45):
Was on ADHD No.
Speaker 2 (10:48):
I think just asking yourself that question during the season,
Like that's the advice I have. I love what Kats
shared about going back I don't know, younger me like
I wish, I don't know. I just would want to
hugger and also shaker and be like, don't miss out
on memories, like that's the one thing. Like both my
mom and my dad have passed away, and I spent
so much time trying to not eat their food and
(11:11):
make family time complicated by bringing my own and altering recipes.
And even when I would host, like my nephews last Christmas,
like made some comment. They're like, remember that one thing's
giving beb hosted and she made us that vegan la
la la mac and cheese or whatever, which if you're
vegan and you have to do that, that's fine. But
I wasn't vegan, but I was trying to control and
I was making it gluten free, vegan loch like everything
(11:34):
about it. And they're like, I thought it kind of
tasted good, but that was my delusion. And I'm hosting
my family and years later, my nephews are like bringing
it up as a good laugh, and I can laugh
about it now, but I had no idea at the
time that they were all like, what.
Speaker 3 (11:49):
The heck is this?
Speaker 2 (11:50):
But I didn't care about them. I was just thinking
about myself, which is so incredibly selfish. But when you're
in an eating disorder like that, it can be selfish.
I have compassion for that version of me, but my
advice to be, like, stop trying to be the buzz
kill and soak up this time with your family. Yeah,
(12:11):
but to your point, Kat, it's like you can't see
through some of it. So I'm sure younger me would
be like.
Speaker 5 (12:16):
What not not the buzzkill? I brought the good cheese, kidd.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
My sugar free pecan pie is slamming.
Speaker 4 (12:22):
Well.
Speaker 5 (12:22):
I think about that with like my grandma is not.
Speaker 4 (12:25):
My grandma used to always make these like sugar cookies
and then the like peanut butter cookies with the hershy
kiss ye, and I didn't eat them for so long,
and it's like, well, I can't ever eat her cookies
again because she's gone. She mailed me a box of
those cookies in a shoe box to college and.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
What'd you do?
Speaker 5 (12:39):
Threw them out? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (12:41):
I probably would have. Yeah, thrown them out and then
made sure I wasn't gonna eat them. And it's like
sprayed windex on them, right And I would kill to
eat one right now?
Speaker 5 (12:48):
Yeah, And I don't have the recipe.
Speaker 3 (12:49):
She wouldn't literally kill, but yes I would.
Speaker 5 (12:52):
I was about to say I would die to eat one,
but that's the same thing. He'll eat one kill.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
You could go to jail.
Speaker 2 (12:59):
Okay, So all this to say, we hope this is helpful,
but I do challenge you to ask yourself that question
during the season of what does this injury now make
possible for me?
Speaker 3 (13:10):
Because maybe if.
Speaker 2 (13:11):
You open yourself up to those other opportunities that could
be quite therapeutic. Honestly, it may help you navigate some
of these other feelings around food and control. You know,
when you tap into other creative parts of your brain
and exercising, look at exercise differently. You Maybe I'll not
be able to take your body to the gym, but
can you take your brain to the gym? Ooh, drop
(13:32):
girls and on that boom grace. Thank you for the email,
Thanks for listening so long. Shout out to the mature brain.
At nineteen, I can tell you're on track. You're on
track to fully develop just fine, all right.
Speaker 3 (13:47):
I hope you have the day you need to have. Bye.
Speaker 4 (13:49):
Bye,
Feeling Things with Amy & Kat News
Host
Amy Brown
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