May 9, 2017 • 65 mins
This is MY GIRL!! One of the greatest humans I have had the blessing to be friends with. Amara Hall is pure soul. She has been behind the scenes working in the music industry for years. Many people may not have even known she is a Spoken Word Artist. Oh, but she is. She understands people so well. She knows how to listen and how to heal. She has so much wisdom to share. I said it before and I'll say it again, she is a mix between Maya Angelou and Oprah and Alicia Keys. #amarahall #carolinehobby #podcast #nashville #spokenwordartist
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:09):
Carola. She's a queen of talking. He was son. She's
only yes, actually got the snoop on on the on side.
No one can do within clid my Carala Carolina, no
(00:29):
one can do win quiet Caroline Carola. Hey, y'all, welcome
to Hyper Caroline Hobby. I am your host, Caroline Hobby.
I know music, I know people, and I know the
questions do you want to ask? So let's get hyper
heads up. These are adults having adult conversations, so there
could be adult content. You guys, I am pumped, beyond
(00:54):
pumped for this episode. It is my girl, Amara Hall.
This woman is one of the most enlightened, wise, thoughtful, spiritual,
yet cool and badass edgy. She absolutely is in touch
with her soul, her calling, her spirit, all of that,
and she's also just the most enjoyable, incredible person to
(01:15):
be around. Has so much wisdom. She's a spoken word artist.
She actually is making her debut with Me at My
I'm having a podcast launch party on May seventeenth, So
the week after this episode airs, Amara is going to
be doing a spoken word concert at Aurora downtown Nashville.
So if you guys are in Nashville, make sure you
come because she's going to be gracing us with her
(01:36):
talent and she is just the bomb dot com. I'm
so excited for you guys to hear what she has
to say. So here is a Mara Hall. I'm here
with the incredible Amara Hall. Thank you for having me.
Otherwise known as a mix between my Angelou Oprah and
then a lot of other women in your life. But
(01:57):
you like go side by side. That's a lot. First,
I know you have, but I literally, ever since I've
known you, you have wisdom, like wisdom, like soul wisdom.
I don't know where it comes from. It's from like
lifetimes passed down to you or something totally totally. I
actually feel that way a lot, and I think it's
(02:21):
just from the women I've met in my life. Man,
They've just they've been incredibly strong, they've been incredibly driven,
they've been you know, they've done a lot of things
on their own. They've been mothers and fathers at times,
and they've you know, traveled from across the world to
raise babies and um, yeah, they've been awesome. Tell me
(02:47):
about the women in your life. Tell me about your upbringing. Well,
West Baltimore born and raised don't want to playground. Um,
I did enjoy the playground, but I was born. Oh
my gosh, I love the monkey bars. I was a
kickballer once the guys figured out that, like, if they
had me on their team, we'd probably win because you
(03:09):
had to pick girls. But then they were like the
girls that you didn't really want on your team anyway. Um.
I grew up in West Baltimore. Um, I mean, I
guess I had a pretty normal childhood mom dad. Um
had a mommy and a daddy. Not to say there's
anything wrong with having two mommies or two daddies. Um,
(03:33):
and yeah, I don't know. I I'm trying to think,
like what to even say about my childhood. Tell me
about your mom and your grandmother, because I know they
profoundly impacted you. So Norma Jean, who's my mother? She
there's whimpering throughout this interview. It's maybe the dog she
(03:53):
has back Arthur Ridday. She's got Boo Boo's got some
issues right now, and we're just but you know what,
We're gonna just let her s out. She needs to say, yeah, exactly,
she needs to speak up. If you hear a little cry,
no one's dying. She's actually just she just doesn't know
what's going on. She's on a lot of payments because
her poor back has major arthritis. I know. Sorry, baby, Okay,
(04:15):
we love you about Norma. So Norma Jean. Uh, let's
see we So my parents split up. I was in
eighth grade and we were moving into a new house.
So is my mother, my brother, my sister, and myself.
Did you know your parents were having troubles or was
(04:35):
it like kind of dropped on you? It was I
didn't really know. I mean, I guess there's always that
sense of you know, you have a sense like, oh,
my parents are fighting and this doesn't feel good. But
I didn't know, Oh my gosh, they're divorcing and we're
going to move. Is that pretty heavy? When that happened,
it was heavy, But I've always been I'm the middle child,
(04:56):
so I'm the peacemaker and I'm the you know, make
everybody off and lighten the mood and let's think about
what's going right, not about what's going wrong, um in
my family. So I feel like I this happened, and
I was upset and I was distraught, and I was
also I just decided, you know what, you gotta keep
(05:19):
things moving. So we in eighth grade and have that
wisdom is kind of it's kind of crazy, like who think,
um me, yeah, I it's it's interesting talking about it
because when it's happening, you're not really you know, that's
that's just kind of how I operate. So I didn't
(05:42):
think it was strange. Um, And then you know, four
years later when you're dealing with it, when you're eighteen,
you're like, oh my gosh, why do I have this
weird perspective of guys? And why do I just want
people to love me? You know, when you're like trying
to figure out where all these emotions are coming from
that you've stuffed, they always come out. So I was
(06:06):
a stuffer, but I understood that I've got a stuff
it right now because I have this incredible opportunity ahead
of me. I was going into this awesome private school,
um that I didn't want to go to because I
didn't want to wear a uniform because I was a
public school girl, and public school girls don't really mess
with private school girls. Not to say there's anything wrong
(06:26):
with that, because I became one. So I I go
to this school, I get this scholarship to play basketball. Um,
and or I'm sorry it was a leadership scholarship, but
it was a scholarship to play basketball. And I just
dove in, you know, I just I used every opportunity
(06:47):
I had to not think about what wasn't going wrong,
you know. At home, it was just like, okay, you've
got a choice here. You can sit here in the
mess and just talk about the mess. Because you know,
my mother was very vocal. She was very you know,
vocal about what was happening to her and how she felt.
(07:09):
It was totally and that's my dad. And so it's like, well, jeez,
you know, I didn't know all this was going on,
but um it totally like my mother is this picture
of of grace and of mercy, like her story is.
So it's so wonderful to know my mother from eighth
(07:33):
grade to now, you know what I mean. And you
I've seen her evolved too, and you come into this
place where, oh my gosh, Norma Jean was Norma Jean
before she had me, you know, and before she met
my father William, you know. And so just to think
about her doing the best she can with what the
(07:56):
knowledge she had, says what did she say do the
best you can and tell you know better until you
know better, and when you know better, do better and
yeah yeah family, Yeah, wow, okay, cool. So you're always
making these I mean, I love it. I love my Angelo.
I definitely don't put myself on the same echelon, but
(08:18):
I love you. You don't yet because you don't see
what I see yet. But I feel so blessed to
have known you before you become this thing that everyone's
going to know because you're so rare. There's something about
you that is so rare and so divinely inspired. Thanks
girl that I know, as long as you keep taking
(08:41):
the steps that you have been, your life will impact
in such a big way exactly how it's supposed to
thank you, And I would be shocked if it was
was not on the same level with Oprah and my
Angela and Alicia Keys. I received that. I just like
to say, I received that. I'm reading this book right
now and it's talking about, like, you know how when
(09:02):
people it's talking about letting go of self deprecating humor
and when people give you compliments, say thank you. You know,
I feel like we have a lot of trouble accepting compliments,
So thank you. Thanks back to Normine. Okay, so right,
(09:22):
what I'm in high school, Norman Jean is totally like
rocking my world. Not to mention Eugenia, who's my grandmother?
Who she you know, third parent? Picking me up from school,
taking me to this practice, taking me to that practice. Um,
Grandma's house was like after school camp for me and
my cousins and my brother and my sister. She um
(09:45):
picked all of us up and we would go to
our house and when our parents were done with school,
they pick us, I mean done with work, they'd pick
us up. And it was the best because you walk
into grandma's house and it's like, Okay, you're either going
to watch the Sound of Music, which was like the
only VHS she had, or you know, we're gonna like
(10:06):
play cards, or like we were just always doing stuff together. Um.
And so I feel like they just both instilled this
this need for community, you know, this need to like
be there for my brothers and sisters. Um, I'm just
gonna say brothers and sisters instead of cousins. But I mean,
like all of us were just this big group of
(10:29):
close knit people, and especially when I got into high school,
I started to realize that there are a lot of
families that don't like their family. Yeah, that was like
so feign to me. I was like, wait, what, I
don't want to hang out with them? Yeah? Right, And
like I can understand that with your parents because we
all go through that. I went through that not wanting
to hang out with my mom, And now right now
(10:50):
I'm like wishing for the day when we live in
the same city again and I can just like go
and curl up. And you know, hey, mom, going on, Um,
what do you think the biggest pieces of wisdom that
your mom and your grandmother in particular instilled in you, Like,
because you have so much confidence and you're so wise.
(11:13):
My mother was a praying mother period end of story.
And my father it's a praying father. Every night before
I went to bed, I heard you are the head
and not the tail. You are above only and not beneath.
You are the daughter of a king. I heard that
every single night before I went to sleep. And I
(11:36):
had a mother who I knew was praying for me.
Every morning I'd wake up and she'd be praying over
me before she yeah, I know, seriously, before she went
to work, prayer to check the church box. Check like
like even now, I'll wake up if I'm at home
(11:56):
for Christmas. When i wake up before my mom goes
out to do whatever, She's got her hand like on
my foot at the end of the bed and it's
like praying over me and then she goes and yeah,
so yeah, but that's just it instilled a real faith
in you. Yeah, yeah, like definitely a faith in yourself,
(12:21):
you know, and knowing that you have a light inside
of you that cannot be distinguished based on I'm sorry,
cannot be extinguished what's that word put out? Thank you
by circumstances and you knew that it cannot it doesn't matter. Yeah,
(12:41):
you knew you were divinely made from a young age,
and you had this connection to your own faith from
a young age, absolutely, and you believed it and walked it. Yeah.
Most people don't have that strong connection. I feel like
a lot don't. Yeah. I mean, and I'm still I'm still,
you know, trying and trying to figure out what that is,
(13:03):
and you know all of it. I think it's a
it's a day by day decision. And I was very,
very blessed just to have parents that understood that you
speak truth over your children, You speak what you want
(13:23):
for them, you can actually speak over their lives. And
I grew up watching that. And then my grandmother, I'll
never forget it. It was her eighty five birthday because
we threw a surprise party and you know, all the
kids we did this like little We did a little
skit because that's what we did, and we just i
(13:44):
mean growing up, it was like our parents must be
so sick of us. We just put on plays, we
put on shows, we put on variety, comedy hours, whatever.
And we had just finished with Grandma and she was,
you know, we were like speech, speech, speech, and she goes,
a life lived for others is the only life worth living.
(14:06):
And you all are a testament to that. And I mean, oh, never, ever, ever, ever,
ever forget that, especially in such a selfish world that
we live in. I mean, I feel like, especially our culture,
you know, it's very self driven to have influences who
are saying live for others and who you respect preaching
(14:29):
that like that is something that's very good advice. And woe.
So when did you discover your gift of words? Because
to me, you are the only person I've ever met
who does spoken word and it flows out of you
like just a river running. And you've been doing it
(14:50):
since high school. You're in competition, like you and I
want you to read some of it here. But where
when did you start realizing you had this gift? And
when did you start taking the leap of faith to
pursue it? I recall a day. Um. Okay, So I
(15:13):
grew up always having a very musical side of the family,
which my father's side. His baby sister is a jazz singer,
phenomenal aunt Julie. What's up girl? Um? And then her
husband was had a studio in his basement and I'm
(15:33):
gonna call him de Low. That's what we call him
on the streets. Uncle Rob and uh. Uncle Rob was
really the first person to allow me to sit in
this safe place with him and create no judgment zone. Um.
You know I always had this, you know, I always
(15:53):
had this thing where I you know, I was that kid.
I love beating on the desks. I loved, you know,
dropping a beat. I loved trying to understand, like I
love the music that moved me really moved me, you know,
and I love listening to it over and over again.
And I love you know, breaking songs down and understand,
you know, like understanding where this person was at when
(16:15):
they love reading liner notes, you know, I love knowing
who the musicians were that played on it. I want
to know. Yeah, I wanted to know it all. And
I was sitting with Uncle Rob one day and he
had you know, at this point he um, you know,
he had my my cousin Natalie and my cousin Nicole,
(16:35):
who let's see, Natalie's ten years younger than me. So, um,
I can tell you it was two thousand seven, two
thousand eight when I really started writing things for my
future self to be encouraged. He does that. Yeah, I
kind of do that stuff now, but I'm thirty four basically,
(16:58):
you know. Yeah, school, I was, well, let's see two
thousand and eight, this would have been post college. So
I mean i've been I've been writing at this time, okay,
And you said, so I was in competitions in college.
So that's when I started writing things and then started
being okay with like, Okay, what is this spoken word
(17:19):
kind of thing. It's very rhythmic, it's very um, It's
got a lot of attitude, a lot of swag. There's
there there's freedom in these words and how you say
them can can just dispel all the doubts and any
stresses you're carrying. You know, it can just poof be gone. Um,
(17:42):
discover spoken on I you know a friend, Yeah, really
really scary. Is the hardest thing I think you could do.
I think a friend of mine just just asked if
I if I'd be interested, and I was happened to
be in a season of yeah. I'm not always in
a season of yes, but I happened to be in
(18:03):
a season of yeah. Okay, yeah, let's try it. Um.
I've been writing previously before this, Um, I'd always been writing.
I've always kept a journal. Oh my gosh, I have
so many journals. It's readick. Um yeah, I just have
journals and journals full of just words. Just sometimes it's
(18:23):
a you're writing a feeling. Sometimes it's you know, a
letter to yourself. Sometimes it's Um. I feel like my
most inspired things have been a stream of what I
call a stream of consciousness. And I feel like to
(18:44):
try to put into words this feeling. Yeah, the moment
though that I knew I had something special, I was
Uncle Rob was in the studio and he was um
hm gosh, I'm trying to think if I can remember
that exact verse. He was, him and I were collaborating
(19:06):
on an idea we had called see the Light, and
so he's in there finishing it up, and I had
stepped out of the studio and I just started writing.
Had no idea, you know what I was writing. But
this is something that I come back to regardless of
(19:27):
where I am in my life, regardless of if I'm happy,
regardless of if things are going right, things are going wrong. Um,
I just I always come back to this, and I
wrote it in two thousand and eight, and um, that's
how I'm gonna I'm probably gonna open every show I
ever do. And yeah, okay, totally kidding. Um, Honestly, I
(19:55):
never really felt like I was worth it until he
back in loud and told me I had a purpose
my past, giving me doubt as lies creep to the surface,
feeling so weighed down, can't show my face in churches.
You're worthless, That's all I hear, becoming my deepest fear.
So I'm hurting, starting to believe that no one really cares.
But my question is, Lord, are you really there? I'll
(20:16):
ask once more, Lord, universe source energy. Are you really there?
Because if you are, can you reach out and meet
me where I am here? I stand stripped, bruised, and
my hope diminished. I'm hardheaded, still doing it my way,
living and sending given into temptation because it's easier than
repent and becoming cool and complacent, got the enemy grinning,
(20:37):
rather keep fake and be averaged than asked for a
new beginning than I heard him say, get your mind right, child.
You were made in my image, and I've been anxiously
awaiting to show you You've been forgiven. You've been forgiven,
you know, all the bullshit, all the bullshit we carry,
You've been forgiven. You know. Just leads me to another question,
(20:58):
like so eloquently put it, you have known your faith
for so long, and you have been in touch with
it for so long, But it is so easy to
want to go down the wrong roads or whatever. How
have you navigated that coming? Have you ever gotten lost
on the wrong path all the time? Check? How do you?
(21:26):
How do you navigate those situations? Because you always come back?
And I'm not like it's anything terrible, but you know
we all have we get lost. Absolutely agree. I I
was reading something tremendous that inspired me. Excuse me, and
I wish I could remember the author right now, but um,
(21:48):
it's a we are just living from moment to moment
of belief. We are just living like you can only
have enough faith for moment to moment, you know, like
that that's all you can't have. You don't have enough
faith for tomorrow and the next day and the next
(22:09):
day because you have no idea what that day brings.
You can only have We can only have faith from
this moment to the next moment, So we have to
live in the moment that yes, absolutely absolutely, I feel like,
oh my gosh, yeah, it's excruciating. Well, I'm trying a
new one right now called meditation, which I told you
(22:31):
about before we got on them is I and that
pretty much for me right now goes with three minutes
of Okay, just check your breathing. Just relax. I wonder
if I put the clothes from the washing machine into
the dry or not. Shut up. Just relax. I wish
(22:54):
diesel would stop scratching. It's a really distratched Just relax.
Oh my gosh, I need to get stamps. You know.
It's like all the just like laundry. List of things
goes in your mind crucial at that time, but it
doesn't matter at all, but really at all. It's so
you know, I feel like I do a variety of things.
I meditate, I pray. My my biggest one though, um,
(23:19):
it's just being around people who lift me up. That's
the biggest thing that I know I can do for myself.
I told you the other day I was I was
having one of those days. I had a day. I
woke up and I swear from the moment I opened
my eyes, somehow I had already been decided this day is.
(23:41):
You know, it's just not going to be a good day.
You know, you wake up and you're just like, yep,
let's just redo, you know, let's just let's start this
one over. And I thought I need to be with
some pure sunshine. And I texted Caroline and I was like,
what are you doing? Can I join you? What is happening?
(24:02):
I just need to be around someone I know that
we'll speak truth over my life, you know, And so
you're the one I go to and I need that
well right back at you. So glad we can both
you know, be that for each other. But that's man,
that is my main thing because those days that you
(24:23):
know and we have them, and it's good to be alone.
I'm not saying that sometimes you don't need to be alone,
because you do. Sometimes you need to be in your
thoughts spiraling. Absolutely absolutely put yourself around around someone else
who's you know, whose energy you can absorb and just
(24:44):
breathe with. You know, And um, I read things you
know reading right now, I'm reading this book that's awesome.
It's called You Are a Badass, and it's specifically about
stopping doubt, just nipping it in the butt because it's
kind of scary. You recently took a very large leap
(25:05):
of faith and yes, some people would say you'd be crazy.
You're away from a great paying jaw. Yes, to literally
pursue your artistry full for us. I want to talk
about that. That to me, when you walk in faith
(25:25):
that's strongly, that is like you're you're showing up for God.
You're saying, Okay, God, you put this calling on my heart.
I feel it and now I'm going to dive into
the abyss and just go for it. And that is
like the most terrifying thing ever because you don't know
what in the freaking world is going to happen, and
(25:46):
you're trusting, then you always go to the worst thing
you like. Mm hmm, no, Anklena, work ain't gonna happen.
I'm a blow up, you know. Somehow something just astronomically
wrong is going to happen, right, and you feel like
you could have potentially ruined your life and now you'll
be broke and living in your car. So tell me
about the leave of faith that you just did, because
(26:07):
obviously you have always been doing spoken work. It's always
been who you are. You've been speaking truth. You are
a truth speaker and you're also a healer. Thank you,
and I feel like that comes from your words. Thank you.
So tell me about what's happening now. Okay, life and career. So,
as you know, this was two months ago. Now I
(26:32):
quit my job. So it was a good job. It
was a good job. So the past four years I've
been in the music industry as um on the business
end I have. That's where we met, you know, we
met at Hit Shop Records, and I've been a everything
from a president's assistant to a office manager, to a
(26:56):
promo coordinator, to a artist manager to a you know,
wrangler of people and things and coffee and whatever the
f needs to get done, get it done kind of person.
And that's what we do. That's what we do, bo
bo get or done. Um. Yeah, And I feel like
(27:19):
I've been learning this get or done mentality, you know.
And you don't have to see the whole staircase to
take one step, you know. And if someone it taught
me so much in just figuring it out. What did
you learn from all those experiences because you knew that
wasn't your soul's calling, but it was kind of crucial
(27:41):
to go to school in learning the entertainment industry. Absolutely absolutely,
And that's exactly what what I thought about it as
I was like, you know what, this is my grad school.
You know, a lot of my friends went to grad school.
A lot of them have PhD s, a lot of
them are in medical school. This was my grad school.
This was my show up every day and get it done,
(28:06):
and show up every day and serve others. Yeah, you
have unworserving yourself. Really you have been. You have been
helping other people accomplish their dreams in learning along the
way and totally and learning a lot and learning, Oh
my gosh, I've had some really really really really awesome teachers,
and this last leap of faith came from UM. I
was actually a Southeast regional and I was working records,
(28:30):
and every day, wake up, and you put your best
foot forward, and no matter how many times you here know,
you keep asking the question, And no matter how many
times you here know you show up at their doorsteps
training camp, and no matter how many times you hear no,
you keep asking the question and you do it with
polite persistence. You know that was a skill set right there. Yeah, totally,
(28:56):
because you can't. It's like, you know, most people when
they get another like okay, runaway, never come back, hide
and corner cave and like just die. Totally. Well, it
taught me a lot because I'm not I don't know
if you know this, but I'm not like a pushy person.
I'm not like you know, okay, great, I'll come back tomorrow.
You know that record I'm talking about? So that record John,
(29:20):
did I mention your hair looks phenomenal? Today? I have
a record that I brought it here. It is how
are you with me? And I'll be like, hey, I know, okay, great,
I'll come back tomorrow. See you later. I love you too,
by because talk about being rejected on a daily basis
(29:42):
being a regional at a record label, well, you know
laws about that. I did it for six months and
I was like, I don't I couldn't last much longer.
It was the same thing, amazing learning opportunity. It taught
me how to navigate all different types of powerful personalities
because the record industry it there are opinionated, powerful people
(30:02):
who ain't budgeting in their thoughts, and you have to
navigate them because you have to be polite. It teaches you.
Then you kind of just become that and it's a
way better way of communicating. Yeah, and I learned a
lot just about having asked for what you want? You do,
don't you gotta ask for it? You can't do this
whole like shy sheepist thing. How did you learn how
(30:25):
to ask for what we want? What was the moment
when you realize that? H? Well, I mean, I guess
I've learned it in different ways throughout my entire life. Um,
but specifically as it relates to the music industry. UM,
I learned that if you don't show people who you are,
they will tell you who you're supposed to be, and
(30:48):
so you have to says an aha moment. Okay, can
you say that again? What did I say? You don't
show people who you are. If you don't show people
who you are, they will tell you who you're supposed
to be. And so I just knew that. Okay. All
I want to be as a tiebreaker and I know
(31:10):
that well, when someone is sitting there and they're thinking
about adding a record, I want them to have to
think about me and my artist, and I want them
to want to do it because they want to support
me and my artist, you know. And I want to
be someone who when people think of me, they think,
(31:33):
you know what, I'm gonna add her record because you
know what, she's just been really kind to me, or
you know she I used to just send random notes
all the time, just because we're all just people, you know,
we're all just freaking people trying to figure out our lives,
(31:55):
trying to figure out relationships and trying to figure you're out,
you know, how to do ship the right way, and
like doing none of us. You have all these people involved,
and you analyze yourself so much you think people hate you,
and it's just awful. You can just really go down
a rabbit hole. I know, I know you want to
(32:16):
be like, but then you've got to be authentic. So
how do you straddle that line of being liked and authentic?
M Because I feel like that is something I've sometimes
struggled with. Yeah, that's a really good question. I'm also
still learning that one. I feel like what I thought
(32:36):
of first when you said that was I've always wanted
to be the friend I want to have, you know,
like I want to I want people to want to
pick up the phone and call me because they just
need to hear a smiling face, or they just need
to hear a word, or maybe they need to hear
nothing at all. You know, I'm really good at just
(32:58):
being with people when they need someone to just be
with them and shut the funk up. You are, you know,
you intentionally choose the way your delivery towards people, Like
do you ever want to be like you're a stupid idiot,
You're so dumb? But then you're like, Okay, it's okay,
we're all human, we all make can here you come
with your wife? Do you ever filter it? Do you?
Or is it just how it comes out of you?
(33:20):
That's a good question. I'm sure m hmm, it comes
out of you like that. I think it just comes
out of me like that. I mean, I'm sure there
are times where I'm like this bitch, but you great
for people? Yeah, where did that come from? It's important
to extend grace to people. Um, a life lesson I learned. Um.
(33:44):
You know, in between that fourteen and eighteen period. Um,
you know where you're you're freaking out because you're, um,
your father is not in your household anymore. And this
vision you know of this man and this protector is
not the same vision that you once had, you know,
(34:05):
and it's changing, and it's scary, and it's you know,
all these things are happening to me. And and you
walk around and you realize you're carrying unforgiveness and you
realize you've got all these things in your backpack that
how the fund did they get there? Because I didn't
pack them in there. You know, you let other people
(34:26):
put shame and guilt and all that other shit that
we carry around because other people projected this and that
on us. And I'll never forget it. I was in
Ecuador and I wrote him a letter, and in that letter,
I swear I released everything I'm saying now, you know,
(34:49):
I just I just released it, and I decided that
I'm responsible for my feelings. I'm responsible for how I
impact the world, you know, and because someone else did
this or that doesn't have any bearing on how I
(35:11):
treat other people, you know. And you say that too.
You don't pick up other people's do you say that?
You don't you hear people's problems, You don't pick up
their trash. You said something, Yeah, well you you you
can't put other people's baggage and garbage in your backpack
and carried around for him. It's not yours, you know,
it's not yours to carry. Yeah, so you learned that forgetting.
(35:34):
I feel like, yeah, totally for him, and you released it. Yeah,
but you have to speak it, don't have to speak it.
And I mean, I still go back and forth, you know.
I'm I'm a little I'm a I'm a little girl.
You know. It's like, oh, well you didn't call me
on at twelve oh one on my birthday, you know,
or whatever. I want to get upset up. I still,
(35:56):
you know, have moments where I'm just in my feelings
and but for the most part, I think that going
through that period of my life really taught me to rely.
Like and then my dad dropped this piece of information
on me. He's like, you know what, Tomora, I'm I'm
(36:18):
just a steward, you know. I mean, yes, i'm your
father and I'll always be there, but I'm just a steward.
You know. I'm not supposed to be the one to
show you all these great wonders because you really have
to find them out for yourself. You know. It's kind
of freeing, scary, like pitting your stomach at the same
(36:40):
totally because I know, so that kind of set you
on your path to like, okay, like you realize your
dad was a flawed human, just like all of us are,
and you realize that all these people that you looked
up to they don't know any better than you do. Really,
so in that point of your age, you rely to yourself. Yeah. Yeah,
(37:03):
I mean what I would call in inner light, what
I call my gut, what I would call God, what
I would call you know, light supreme ultra violet rays
and beams and stuff, you know, like all like your
your core, you know, your wherever you gather that that
(37:26):
energy from that is like refreshing, you know, and it's
you don't have to be anything to be in its presence.
You just are you know what I mean, Um what
I would call that light? Yeah, it's a inner peace. Absolutely, absolutely,
it's you know, it's it's why people people strive for,
(37:51):
you know, joy and not happiness, because happiness, you know,
can change day to day, but joy that doesn't change. Okay,
So you're in this job, You're working records, you're talking
to radio p ds. You actually are part of the
promotion stuff that gets say number one song. Yeah, I
love this, I love this, crushing it at your job.
(38:13):
Just like doing this job, you're actually like killing it.
Yeah I was. I'm going to go right ahead to
honored to be a part of their team because I
have never met I was supposed to see that I
was supposed to see that rise. I was supposed to
see that magic. Because what Chris and Preston do when
(38:37):
they bring people into a room, Chris and Preston are
low cash. You are the only person in that room.
They understand that this is a business of relationships, and
they understand that if you bring people into your world
and make them feel a part of something, that when
that that time comes, they'll they'll lift you up, you know,
(38:58):
they'll lift you up to that number one spot. And
they value those relationships. They value them. And we saw that,
you know, and I got to be a part of
UM a gold record with I Love This Life and
a number one with I Know Somebody, and I UM,
I was just really blessed to have someone who believed
(39:21):
in me enough to say here's the Southeast, why don't
you go scurry along and take it. You know, I've
never done this before, I UM. But that that means
like you now are in charge of all the radio
stations in the Southeast getting them to add low cash
is singles. So it's like fly on girls. Yeah, absolutely,
(39:42):
And these are you know, these are these are guys
that people people love and and loved to support. When
that when that roller coaster, I say, it was like
you know, chicken towards chucking, towards the upswing. Um, but
it was it was an uphill battle, you know, and
(40:04):
it was a battle. And I feel like it just
taught me exactly she knows she's like girl, it was
a battle. WHOA, Yes, it was, um, but it also
you know, it makes those those moments so sweet and February,
you know, when you're sitting there and you're toasting them
(40:25):
and they're all sitting on stage talking about this wonderful
moment in their lives. You know, they haven't. They have
a number one record, you know, and no one will ever,
ever ever take that away from them. And they I
mean they should be. They should be proud, beyond beyond
(40:45):
belief of themselves because they never ever even talking about
never given up. There's never given up. And then there's
like low cash, never given up. They never gave up,
can't stop stop the whole time, and they absolutely your
(41:06):
big break and then you quit, yep, talking about that. Well,
um good segue. M hmm. Well, to be honest, um,
the number one if I know somebody, I know somebody
(41:29):
uh coincided with It was like that rise of that
song coincided with the decline of my grandmother's health. And
my grandmother turned on October and I flew into see her.
(41:49):
This was like, you know, this was the week that
we were you know, we went six to one, so
I think we were at six and you know, I
just told him, I was like, guys, act so this
was this is pushed, This is push week, okay, and
you know told, I told my boss is like, guys,
I I've got to be there. I've just got to
(42:11):
be there. I don't know how long we have. I
don't know if this is what this is, but I've
got to be there. And they were just like, go,
didn't even bat n. I UM, forever, forever grateful that
I went, you know, because we have so many moments
and our our grandparents lives and even our parents lives
were you know, a little little things happen here and there,
and we can't be there for everything. But um, I've
(42:33):
always felt that was one of my love languages, was
quality time. So I fly in. It's grandma's birthday. We
celebrate her birthday in the hospital, Like for real, think
about I can't even think about all the things she's seen.
She must think we are looking crazy. She's like, uh,
(42:56):
I grew up during the Great Depression and now there's
a phone that I can talk to my granddaughter on
and see her, you know. Anyway, So I UM. I
ended up staying in Baltimore for about a week, and
I'm glad I did because I would, you know, i'd
I'd work for a few hours and then I'd go
(43:17):
and just hang out with her, and we got to
the end of the week and I go back home
and two days later she passes. And I remember being
on a conference call um before I found out. I
(43:41):
remember we had a conference call. It was Monday, and
I said, you know, they were all asking, and Gator goes,
you know, so for all the people who've who have
just now gotten there, you know, first number one, how
does it feel? And I remember sitting in that for
a second and being like, you know, it feels good.
(44:07):
It feels great. You know, everyone's saying congratulations, and everyone's like,
oh my gosh, like high five, high fives from all around,
you know, Radio is actually calling me, you know, and
that it feels great. But it didn't feel how I
thought it would feel. How did you think it would feel?
(44:27):
Butterflies and rainbows and stickers and glitter and oh my gosh, yep,
just rooms of puppies, just rooms of puppies. Every hour,
new sets of puppies just coming on it, just fresh puppies,
Oh my gosh. And it didn't feel like that. And
I had to face a very real truth within myself,
(44:51):
which was, what are you doing this for? Who? Are
you doing this? Who are you doing this for? I
think I was doing it for a combination of people
within my building, um music mentors who had put me
in a position where I was in this position, you know,
(45:12):
and people that had just instilled so much belief in
me that I could do it, that I thought I
could do it, and I did it. I did it.
It felt good. It probably was validating. It was. It
was very validating. So that was probably a necessary thing
you needed to feel to validate that you actually have
this ability to make something started from the bottom and
(45:34):
go to the top in a real business world. Yeah,
it was hard, and afterwards, quite frankly, I needed a
fucking vacation. I was like, whoa lord, And then it
was like, okay, let's do it again. And I was
(45:56):
just like, you're like I had one in me. That
was it dropped the mic. Oh I'll catch y'all. I'll
watch you guys on the charts. You literally didn't think
you had another one in you. Well, like, I don't
know what I was thinking, honest lamar, like, what, You're
gonna get a number one and then they're going to
send you to Cancoon for a week and then you know,
(46:19):
but I just I just realized that I I feel
like I felt things too deeply. You know, when people
didn't call me back, I would be like, fuck, why
do they call me back? Like I'm a nice person
to talk to, and my nice person to talk maybe
I suck? People tell me I'm cool. No, you're not
(46:40):
that cool. You know what I mean? Do I know
what you mean? I have lived in that real tapes.
I think all artists mentality people and just oh's analyzing
and and I felt my true self, which is I'm
a I'm a feeling person. You know, I'm an artist
and I'm sense it if about my ship. As Ericabaidou said,
(47:04):
so why are you trying to put this square peg
into a round hole? And you wrote like a spoken
word song about this? Okay, what's that one called? Um? Well,
I've got to call it inner. Oh it's I don't know,
it's called interlude? Right now? Can you give us a
little bit of that? Um? But it starts um? Wake up,
(47:25):
get dressed, go to work nine to five until it hurts. Well,
that really don't work for me. Wake up, get happy,
do your job. Nine to five is all a blur
that really don't work for me. It's time to let
my passion do the talking. Nine to five. Stop fucking
with my creativity. Because while I'm ever so grateful, I
always wanted to be able to put food on the table,
(47:48):
support my family and those of y'all who've been with me.
But deep beside, it's killing me. My soul cries, It
is killing me. It's killing me. Yeah, m m m
mmm mm hmmm mm hmm. But my soul cries every
time that nine five takes over. Seems so summer days over.
Want to go back to tempy tall on Daddy's shoulders
those days. See, I never knew what I had to
(48:10):
do to be the better me. See music betters me,
makes me a better person, makes it all come together
and feel worth it. Yes, you were worthy and the
journey's worth it. Just keep working. Eyes on your purpose,
listen to yourself, keep your eyes on your purpose. Mm
hmm yeah yeah, did that? I feel like I should
call it eyes on your Purpose. That's more like I
(48:32):
like eyes on your purpose. Did that come to you
in that season? Was screaming just came? Well? You and
I had had a dream board session. We had one
of the most spiritual experiences probably. Actually, it was the
most spiritual experience I've had, was that moment with you. Yeah.
I needed to I needed to dream. Oh man, I
(48:53):
just I was in this moment of It was December four,
it was my mother's birthday. I'll never forget it was
your mom's birthday. It was my mom's birthday. I know, right.
You had just come home from something and you're like
and you just texted me out of the blue and
you're just like, hey, you won't have a sleepover. And
I was like, oh, you're not to sleepover in so long.
(49:14):
It's like, yeah, let's go have a sleepover. And I
was already thinking like, okay, we can dream board. This
will be great because I was needing some help articulating
what this calling, what this purpose is because I felt it,
and it's so it can be so frustrating when you
feel it and you you know that it's coming and
you know it will be revealed to you, but it's
(49:34):
never fast enough. It's never fast enough, and every day
you wake up and you're like, it's this thing. It's
just burning, and it's this thing. It makes your heart beat,
it makes you know, what makes you just it makes
you sweat and feel amazing and I couldn't articulate it,
and I was like, okay, and you texted me, as
(49:55):
you know, we often flow with each other when we
just need some sort of something, you know, from one another,
and yeah, I get over here and I've got my
notebook check you know, I've got I was like, I don't.
I don't know what I was thinking we were going
to do, but what happened I never could have imagined,
(50:17):
you know what I mean. Like I was literally thinking, Okay,
We're gonna like cut out scrap books and I'm gonna like,
you know, put things like summer and you know, bikinis
and like, you know, I want to be on an
island somewhere. And I don't know what I thought it
would be, but it was. It really was magical because
you just started asking me the questions I needed to
(50:38):
ask myself, and I finally had the time to think
about them. You know. We started that session at like
nine at nine, and we went to like four in
the morning, and then it was like, Okay, go to sleep. Okay,
we have to go to sleep. Okay, we have to
go to sleep. Yeah, it was crazy, because it was crazy.
I think you hadn't realized how your spoken word get
(51:02):
is actually your career. You've been doing it as you
knew you loved it, but like you hadn't quite gone
all in totally totally. And I started, you know, Caroline
was like asking me questions, you know, when you're like, well,
what what is you know? What what are you really
(51:23):
good at? You know, it was something really dumb, you know,
it was really straightforward and done, like well what are
you really good at? And I was just like, I
don't know, spucking word? And you were like you was
spoken word that ship, And I was like what? And
you could always like spoken words just in life, like
you almost speak in spoken words just in real life.
(51:43):
That's awesome. Then you say, oh, I just have notebooks
and notebooks and notebooks have spoken word, and I just
have recordings all the notes on my phone and recorded
basically a full album already. You're just kind of doing
it on the side. But you have these amazing master
piece songs that are like spoken word, and you have
some collaps with some singers and some beats like this creation,
(52:06):
and it's just like, oh yeah, I just have all
this just sitting here, Like who just has all that
just sitting there and spoken word. You know, that is
not like a common thing. I know when when we
when we discovered it, it was kind of like, gosh,
you're this is like you just can't see it. What
happened was, yeah, that's just you know, yeah, I don't
(52:31):
even know what to call that. What did you feel
after that moment that, like, how did you feel? Because
like that moment, I feel like you decided to pursue
it for I felt an insane amount of just purpose.
You know. There's I feel like there's always that feeling
in the morning of I want to wake up and
I want to be jolted out of bed. I'm I'm
(52:53):
so excited to do what I was made to do,
you know. And it was for the first time, it
was a really ease. It was a release of all
the stress I had been carrying thinking that. And this
is something that Tyler helps me with all the time.
That's my boyfriend. He always says, you have the right
(53:13):
to change your mind. And I've been holding on to,
you know, all these expectations of who I felt I
was supposed to be in the professional world, you know,
and and I mean a lot of my artists don't
even really know that I've had this stuff on side
because I understand the importance of what I was doing
was to be there, you know, and it wasn't really
(53:35):
to shine a light on whatever this is that was happening.
Because I needed this to happen inside of me, and
I needed to come to it by myself, you know,
I really needed to. And even if you're you know,
even if your path is this, we get so frustrated
that it's not like this, like even if it's like this,
(53:57):
like holy moley, I mean, I feel like the knowledge
that I've accrued in the last five years being in
this town is it's invaluable and it's exactly what I
needed to propel me. Before you were ready to launch.
You needed to go to school, Yeah, absolutely, school of
(54:18):
hard knocks. Go ahead, Okay, Yeah, you're gonna be. You're
gonna be. You're gonna be like my puff daddy, Like
I'm gonna have you come on the track and just
be like uh huh huh yeah, because I have swaged
like daddy. Yes, Okay, we're exactly the same. Like I'm
(54:45):
so cool. He is I could never even try. He's
so bad. Yeah, so tell me what's happening next? Okay,
so we have a debut together. This podcast is actually
going through here. We made a agreement that night, wrote
we made an agreement that night that you were going
(55:06):
to have a big Nashville showcase because you've been doing
this and you've been pursuing it kind of quietly and
like doing stuff. But like we made an agreement that
we were going on your birthday, we were going to
have a show. Well, you were going to the show,
but like obviously I was in this with you because
we were like grabbing this thing together and my podcast.
(55:29):
I'm having a podcast like little launch party on May
seventeenth and guests who the featured performers, who am Hall
It's so cool And it was like they when I
got the party and the launch thing together. Randomly, I
even tried to change it to May tenth because I
didn't think I was I didn't want to skip a
(55:50):
week with podcasting. My schedule wasn't lining up. But she
was a woman in charge of everything, was like, no,
we really need to be on seventeenth. I was like okay,
and then everything fell into line. This interview you and
I phone into line, you performing phone to line and
then I looked at the date and it was May
freaking seventeen. Cannot believe that that's not God, just like
(56:13):
drop the mic. If that is not God, then I
don't know what is it gives. I cannot think about
it too hard because it's just it's just magic, you know.
I feel like when most of the time, when things
are happening as they're supposed to happen, it just feels
(56:36):
it feels like breathing, you know, it just feels natural,
and it feels like magic happens in pretty magical moments.
I want people to feel that because you have to
have faith, and you have to be brave, and you
have to quit your job after you just got like
basically two back to back number one and you're crushing
in at your very well high paid, respectful job. You
(56:57):
have been going to quit with no with no freaking
pair shoot and yep, and no more bi weekly payments
and yep, oh my gosh. If But but it seems
so crazy because this whole time I was so caught
up on like, how are you going to say no
to this? You know what I mean? How are you
going to walk away from bi weekly payments? And when
(57:20):
I think about that measured up to what I really
want to do, you know, and how I want to
impact the world. It's just fluff, you know, it's just
would not let we got one? Why would you not
let your soul sing? Let your freak flag fly? Let
it fly? And another thing, this is another tyler ism. Gosh,
(57:46):
he is always saying that the teacher is the teacher
because they've failed the most times, so they know they've
they've tried it hot, you have it on your board.
No fear, all faith, you know, Like we get so
caught up in that initial like, well, a lot of
people don't like it. What if I, oh my gosh,
(58:06):
and I'm not gonna you know what I mean, This
podcast is a leap of faith. People are gonna hate it, right,
look like an idiot. And it's like, if you don't
get past that initial feeling of I can't breathe, you
won't do anything. You won't do anything, You won't you
have to be so prepared for people to laugh at
(58:27):
you and everything to fall apart. But that also comes
from knowing that you're following, you're calling and trusting in
the higher force more than the external world that we
live in. And that is what I call a leap
of faith. What does that quote? Yeah, you got You
haven't got to read this quote straight up said this.
She's gonna say. I was on enough. It was a
(58:50):
you're right, we were. We were flowing because I had
just walked away from an incredible opportunity in the music industry,
like signed a record deal and everything, and I walked
away to pursue hosting and this podcast or like what
what is it? I didn't even know what a podcast was. Oh,
let me start my podcast and long away from major
label record deal because that's smart, know whatever. But I
(59:13):
knew it. Like how you felt you were dying in
your job being a regional, I was dying in this
record deal and I knew it wasn't my calling. So
we had this quote. He said, I know that even
though I didn't know where I was going, I knew
the moment I was walking away from a great opportunity
that there was a greater one in front of me.
That's what I call a leap of faith. That's what
(59:34):
you just did, girl, And the world will know your name,
Amara Hall, because you will change the world for the
greater good. And you have so much love. You have
so much grace, you have so much you have. You
have the ability to make people want to forgive themselves,
to forgive other people, and then march on to be
the better version of themselves. You have that ability. You
(59:55):
are a healer. I've said it from the second I
met you. You take people where they are. You don't
get mad at them for their flaws and the terrible
things they've done. You wrap them in your arms and
you go, Okay, we're gonna we're gonna be great together.
Makes want to cry because that's how much I believe
in you and I know what you're supposed to do.
And I said, mark my words, the first woman black
(01:00:16):
president will probably be here within the next twenty years.
I was saying, I pray sooner you will be at
the inaugural address. I know we totally have that vision.
You will. Hey, I accept that. I know you will,
and I have to be your day. Can you imagine?
I will imagine? I see it. I know. Oh my gosh, girl,
(01:00:37):
they got a real better on these rolls. I mean,
I just yeah, okay, let's do it. What's twenty years
from now? Hopefully I'll be sooner. But I stay within twenty,
that will happen, and by then you will be like
deep into your career. You and Alicia Keys have done
tons of class because you are twins. I feel like
(01:00:59):
I can't even tell about Alicia Keys because I dream
about her, like I literally think we're already friends. You
are y'all cut from the same cloth. It's that weird.
A soul knows when it meets someone it is supposed
to be with. You know. She wrote a song called
Superwoman and it goes because ah am superma, Yes I am,
(01:01:26):
Yes you are, even when I'm a mess stupid on
a vest within us so much as oh, yes I'm
a super woma. And I was reading an interview and
she said she wrote that song because she needed to
hear that song. And that's what you do. That's how
I feel, you know. Okay, so we're gonna wrap up.
(01:01:48):
Leave your light. You're just a ball of inspiration, Like
everything you say is inspiring. You are inspiration to me.
You are just bright light. Thank you. So this is
gonna be hard to ask you to just pick some
piece of inspiration, but leave some inspiration of how you've
been inspired or how you want to inspire people. Um M, hmm.
(01:02:14):
I would say as someone who has a very creative side,
and it is very conscious of the fact that I
am surrounded by so many bright lights. You know, we
are in such a super super saturated city of bright
lights us. How awesome for us. I'm glad you said
(01:02:38):
that instead of what I sometimes think, which is, oh gosh,
I hope my light will shine just as bright as there's.
You know, we get like we we start doubting yourself.
You start doubting yourself. See all these other people shining
so bright. I would I want to leave you with right,
(01:02:59):
with no one intension of making it great, to all
my creative people out there, do it for the love,
you know, right, with no intention of making it great.
You know, don't We go onto all these rooms with
these people who have all these accolades, and they've done this,
and they've done that, and they've taken it to this
place and that place, and we forget we are but vessels.
(01:03:23):
We are here. We are here to leave, to leave
you know, our our voice, you know, and and our perspective,
and no one else can do you like you do
you nobody, And that should give you the greatest confidence
to pursue what you know you're meant to do for
sure really agrees. Okay, so take us out of one
(01:03:48):
last spoken word, okay, taking you out m hm m
hm m hm um. It's a couple of things that
I'm sure of the hardest steps to take are the
first ones, the ones that will break your heart if
you don't try, you don't try or even go for it.
So baby, go for it and don't wait for who
(01:04:10):
they want you to be. Probably ain't that great, you know.
The trials that you beat are the ones you face
head on, sweaty palm saying, please Lord today, give me
the courage, because it's gotta be today. I gotta make
a change. There's gotta be a way for me to
find a sense of freedom, hiding in the mundane, to
keep believing that I'm doing the right thing. Peacema Hal
(01:04:34):
y'all come see us at Aurora downtown Nashville on her
birthday turning thirty May sevent it's going to be it's
gonna be her Nashville Showcase, and it's gonna rock your
face in your world. See all there care. I know
(01:04:55):
you guys loved that episode. I loved it. It was
one of my favorite episodes I've ever done. I love
Mr our Hall. Next week, you guys, I have Lou
Taylor joining me. Lou Taylor is the CEO of Trystar Entertainment.
It's a business entertainment group and she is a badass batch.
This woman gets it done with grace, with style, with heart,
(01:05:16):
with faith. She does not take any shye from anyone,
and she is just such an example of how to
be a strong, powerful woman. I love her so much
so next week join me for Lou Taylor
Carola. She's a queen of talking. He was son. She's
only yes, actually got the snoop on on the on side.
No one can do within clid my Carala Carolina, no
(00:29):
one can do win quiet Caroline Carola. Hey, y'all, welcome
to Hyper Caroline Hobby. I am your host, Caroline Hobby.
I know music, I know people, and I know the
questions do you want to ask? So let's get hyper
heads up. These are adults having adult conversations, so there
could be adult content. You guys, I am pumped, beyond
(00:54):
pumped for this episode. It is my girl, Amara Hall.
This woman is one of the most enlightened, wise, thoughtful, spiritual,
yet cool and badass edgy. She absolutely is in touch
with her soul, her calling, her spirit, all of that,
and she's also just the most enjoyable, incredible person to
(01:15):
be around. Has so much wisdom. She's a spoken word artist.
She actually is making her debut with Me at My
I'm having a podcast launch party on May seventeenth, So
the week after this episode airs, Amara is going to
be doing a spoken word concert at Aurora downtown Nashville.
So if you guys are in Nashville, make sure you
come because she's going to be gracing us with her
(01:36):
talent and she is just the bomb dot com. I'm
so excited for you guys to hear what she has
to say. So here is a Mara Hall. I'm here
with the incredible Amara Hall. Thank you for having me.
Otherwise known as a mix between my Angelou Oprah and
then a lot of other women in your life. But
(01:57):
you like go side by side. That's a lot. First,
I know you have, but I literally, ever since I've
known you, you have wisdom, like wisdom, like soul wisdom.
I don't know where it comes from. It's from like
lifetimes passed down to you or something totally totally. I
actually feel that way a lot, and I think it's
(02:21):
just from the women I've met in my life. Man,
They've just they've been incredibly strong, they've been incredibly driven,
they've been you know, they've done a lot of things
on their own. They've been mothers and fathers at times,
and they've you know, traveled from across the world to
raise babies and um, yeah, they've been awesome. Tell me
(02:47):
about the women in your life. Tell me about your upbringing. Well,
West Baltimore born and raised don't want to playground. Um,
I did enjoy the playground, but I was born. Oh
my gosh, I love the monkey bars. I was a
kickballer once the guys figured out that, like, if they
had me on their team, we'd probably win because you
(03:09):
had to pick girls. But then they were like the
girls that you didn't really want on your team anyway. Um.
I grew up in West Baltimore. Um, I mean, I
guess I had a pretty normal childhood mom dad. Um
had a mommy and a daddy. Not to say there's
anything wrong with having two mommies or two daddies. Um,
(03:33):
and yeah, I don't know. I I'm trying to think,
like what to even say about my childhood. Tell me
about your mom and your grandmother, because I know they
profoundly impacted you. So Norma Jean, who's my mother? She
there's whimpering throughout this interview. It's maybe the dog she
(03:53):
has back Arthur Ridday. She's got Boo Boo's got some
issues right now, and we're just but you know what,
We're gonna just let her s out. She needs to say, yeah, exactly,
she needs to speak up. If you hear a little cry,
no one's dying. She's actually just she just doesn't know
what's going on. She's on a lot of payments because
her poor back has major arthritis. I know. Sorry, baby, Okay,
(04:15):
we love you about Norma. So Norma Jean. Uh, let's
see we So my parents split up. I was in
eighth grade and we were moving into a new house.
So is my mother, my brother, my sister, and myself.
Did you know your parents were having troubles or was
(04:35):
it like kind of dropped on you? It was I
didn't really know. I mean, I guess there's always that
sense of you know, you have a sense like, oh,
my parents are fighting and this doesn't feel good. But
I didn't know, Oh my gosh, they're divorcing and we're
going to move. Is that pretty heavy? When that happened,
it was heavy, But I've always been I'm the middle child,
(04:56):
so I'm the peacemaker and I'm the you know, make
everybody off and lighten the mood and let's think about
what's going right, not about what's going wrong, um in
my family. So I feel like I this happened, and
I was upset and I was distraught, and I was
also I just decided, you know what, you gotta keep
(05:19):
things moving. So we in eighth grade and have that
wisdom is kind of it's kind of crazy, like who think,
um me, yeah, I it's it's interesting talking about it
because when it's happening, you're not really you know, that's
that's just kind of how I operate. So I didn't
(05:42):
think it was strange. Um, And then you know, four
years later when you're dealing with it, when you're eighteen,
you're like, oh my gosh, why do I have this
weird perspective of guys? And why do I just want
people to love me? You know, when you're like trying
to figure out where all these emotions are coming from
that you've stuffed, they always come out. So I was
(06:06):
a stuffer, but I understood that I've got a stuff
it right now because I have this incredible opportunity ahead
of me. I was going into this awesome private school,
um that I didn't want to go to because I
didn't want to wear a uniform because I was a
public school girl, and public school girls don't really mess
with private school girls. Not to say there's anything wrong
(06:26):
with that, because I became one. So I I go
to this school, I get this scholarship to play basketball. Um,
and or I'm sorry it was a leadership scholarship, but
it was a scholarship to play basketball. And I just
dove in, you know, I just I used every opportunity
(06:47):
I had to not think about what wasn't going wrong,
you know. At home, it was just like, okay, you've
got a choice here. You can sit here in the
mess and just talk about the mess. Because you know,
my mother was very vocal. She was very you know,
vocal about what was happening to her and how she felt.
(07:09):
It was totally and that's my dad. And so it's like, well, jeez,
you know, I didn't know all this was going on,
but um it totally like my mother is this picture
of of grace and of mercy, like her story is.
So it's so wonderful to know my mother from eighth
(07:33):
grade to now, you know what I mean. And you
I've seen her evolved too, and you come into this
place where, oh my gosh, Norma Jean was Norma Jean
before she had me, you know, and before she met
my father William, you know. And so just to think
about her doing the best she can with what the
(07:56):
knowledge she had, says what did she say do the
best you can and tell you know better until you
know better, and when you know better, do better and
yeah yeah family, Yeah, wow, okay, cool. So you're always
making these I mean, I love it. I love my Angelo.
I definitely don't put myself on the same echelon, but
(08:18):
I love you. You don't yet because you don't see
what I see yet. But I feel so blessed to
have known you before you become this thing that everyone's
going to know because you're so rare. There's something about
you that is so rare and so divinely inspired. Thanks
girl that I know, as long as you keep taking
(08:41):
the steps that you have been, your life will impact
in such a big way exactly how it's supposed to
thank you, And I would be shocked if it was
was not on the same level with Oprah and my
Angela and Alicia Keys. I received that. I just like
to say, I received that. I'm reading this book right
now and it's talking about, like, you know how when
(09:02):
people it's talking about letting go of self deprecating humor
and when people give you compliments, say thank you. You know,
I feel like we have a lot of trouble accepting compliments,
So thank you. Thanks back to Normine. Okay, so right,
(09:22):
what I'm in high school, Norman Jean is totally like
rocking my world. Not to mention Eugenia, who's my grandmother?
Who she you know, third parent? Picking me up from school,
taking me to this practice, taking me to that practice. Um,
Grandma's house was like after school camp for me and
my cousins and my brother and my sister. She um
(09:45):
picked all of us up and we would go to
our house and when our parents were done with school,
they pick us, I mean done with work, they'd pick
us up. And it was the best because you walk
into grandma's house and it's like, Okay, you're either going
to watch the Sound of Music, which was like the
only VHS she had, or you know, we're gonna like
(10:06):
play cards, or like we were just always doing stuff together. Um.
And so I feel like they just both instilled this
this need for community, you know, this need to like
be there for my brothers and sisters. Um, I'm just
gonna say brothers and sisters instead of cousins. But I mean,
like all of us were just this big group of
(10:29):
close knit people, and especially when I got into high school,
I started to realize that there are a lot of
families that don't like their family. Yeah, that was like
so feign to me. I was like, wait, what, I
don't want to hang out with them? Yeah? Right, And
like I can understand that with your parents because we
all go through that. I went through that not wanting
to hang out with my mom, And now right now
(10:50):
I'm like wishing for the day when we live in
the same city again and I can just like go
and curl up. And you know, hey, mom, going on, Um,
what do you think the biggest pieces of wisdom that
your mom and your grandmother in particular instilled in you, Like,
because you have so much confidence and you're so wise.
(11:13):
My mother was a praying mother period end of story.
And my father it's a praying father. Every night before
I went to bed, I heard you are the head
and not the tail. You are above only and not beneath.
You are the daughter of a king. I heard that
every single night before I went to sleep. And I
(11:36):
had a mother who I knew was praying for me.
Every morning I'd wake up and she'd be praying over
me before she yeah, I know, seriously, before she went
to work, prayer to check the church box. Check like
like even now, I'll wake up if I'm at home
(11:56):
for Christmas. When i wake up before my mom goes
out to do whatever, She's got her hand like on
my foot at the end of the bed and it's
like praying over me and then she goes and yeah,
so yeah, but that's just it instilled a real faith
in you. Yeah, yeah, like definitely a faith in yourself,
(12:21):
you know, and knowing that you have a light inside
of you that cannot be distinguished based on I'm sorry,
cannot be extinguished what's that word put out? Thank you
by circumstances and you knew that it cannot it doesn't matter. Yeah,
(12:41):
you knew you were divinely made from a young age,
and you had this connection to your own faith from
a young age, absolutely, and you believed it and walked it. Yeah.
Most people don't have that strong connection. I feel like
a lot don't. Yeah. I mean, and I'm still I'm still,
you know, trying and trying to figure out what that is,
(13:03):
and you know all of it. I think it's a
it's a day by day decision. And I was very,
very blessed just to have parents that understood that you
speak truth over your children, You speak what you want
(13:23):
for them, you can actually speak over their lives. And
I grew up watching that. And then my grandmother, I'll
never forget it. It was her eighty five birthday because
we threw a surprise party and you know, all the
kids we did this like little We did a little
skit because that's what we did, and we just i
(13:44):
mean growing up, it was like our parents must be
so sick of us. We just put on plays, we
put on shows, we put on variety, comedy hours, whatever.
And we had just finished with Grandma and she was,
you know, we were like speech, speech, speech, and she goes,
a life lived for others is the only life worth living.
(14:06):
And you all are a testament to that. And I mean, oh, never, ever, ever, ever,
ever forget that, especially in such a selfish world that
we live in. I mean, I feel like, especially our culture,
you know, it's very self driven to have influences who
are saying live for others and who you respect preaching
(14:29):
that like that is something that's very good advice. And woe.
So when did you discover your gift of words? Because
to me, you are the only person I've ever met
who does spoken word and it flows out of you
like just a river running. And you've been doing it
(14:50):
since high school. You're in competition, like you and I
want you to read some of it here. But where
when did you start realizing you had this gift? And
when did you start taking the leap of faith to
pursue it? I recall a day. Um. Okay, So I
(15:13):
grew up always having a very musical side of the family,
which my father's side. His baby sister is a jazz singer,
phenomenal aunt Julie. What's up girl? Um? And then her
husband was had a studio in his basement and I'm
(15:33):
gonna call him de Low. That's what we call him
on the streets. Uncle Rob and uh. Uncle Rob was
really the first person to allow me to sit in
this safe place with him and create no judgment zone. Um.
You know I always had this, you know, I always
(15:53):
had this thing where I you know, I was that kid.
I love beating on the desks. I loved, you know,
dropping a beat. I loved trying to understand, like I
love the music that moved me really moved me, you know,
and I love listening to it over and over again.
And I love you know, breaking songs down and understand,
you know, like understanding where this person was at when
(16:15):
they love reading liner notes, you know, I love knowing
who the musicians were that played on it. I want
to know. Yeah, I wanted to know it all. And
I was sitting with Uncle Rob one day and he
had you know, at this point he um, you know,
he had my my cousin Natalie and my cousin Nicole,
(16:35):
who let's see, Natalie's ten years younger than me. So, um,
I can tell you it was two thousand seven, two
thousand eight when I really started writing things for my
future self to be encouraged. He does that. Yeah, I
kind of do that stuff now, but I'm thirty four basically,
(16:58):
you know. Yeah, school, I was, well, let's see two
thousand and eight, this would have been post college. So
I mean i've been I've been writing at this time, okay,
And you said, so I was in competitions in college.
So that's when I started writing things and then started
being okay with like, Okay, what is this spoken word
(17:19):
kind of thing. It's very rhythmic, it's very um, It's
got a lot of attitude, a lot of swag. There's
there there's freedom in these words and how you say
them can can just dispel all the doubts and any
stresses you're carrying. You know, it can just poof be gone. Um,
(17:42):
discover spoken on I you know a friend, Yeah, really
really scary. Is the hardest thing I think you could do.
I think a friend of mine just just asked if
I if I'd be interested, and I was happened to
be in a season of yeah. I'm not always in
a season of yes, but I happened to be in
(18:03):
a season of yeah. Okay, yeah, let's try it. Um.
I've been writing previously before this, Um, I'd always been writing.
I've always kept a journal. Oh my gosh, I have
so many journals. It's readick. Um yeah, I just have
journals and journals full of just words. Just sometimes it's
(18:23):
a you're writing a feeling. Sometimes it's you know, a
letter to yourself. Sometimes it's Um. I feel like my
most inspired things have been a stream of what I
call a stream of consciousness. And I feel like to
(18:44):
try to put into words this feeling. Yeah, the moment
though that I knew I had something special, I was
Uncle Rob was in the studio and he was um
hm gosh, I'm trying to think if I can remember
that exact verse. He was, him and I were collaborating
(19:06):
on an idea we had called see the Light, and
so he's in there finishing it up, and I had
stepped out of the studio and I just started writing.
Had no idea, you know what I was writing. But
this is something that I come back to regardless of
(19:27):
where I am in my life, regardless of if I'm happy,
regardless of if things are going right, things are going wrong. Um,
I just I always come back to this, and I
wrote it in two thousand and eight, and um, that's
how I'm gonna I'm probably gonna open every show I
ever do. And yeah, okay, totally kidding. Um, Honestly, I
(19:55):
never really felt like I was worth it until he
back in loud and told me I had a purpose
my past, giving me doubt as lies creep to the surface,
feeling so weighed down, can't show my face in churches.
You're worthless, That's all I hear, becoming my deepest fear.
So I'm hurting, starting to believe that no one really cares.
But my question is, Lord, are you really there? I'll
(20:16):
ask once more, Lord, universe source energy. Are you really there?
Because if you are, can you reach out and meet
me where I am here? I stand stripped, bruised, and
my hope diminished. I'm hardheaded, still doing it my way,
living and sending given into temptation because it's easier than
repent and becoming cool and complacent, got the enemy grinning,
(20:37):
rather keep fake and be averaged than asked for a
new beginning than I heard him say, get your mind right, child.
You were made in my image, and I've been anxiously
awaiting to show you You've been forgiven. You've been forgiven,
you know, all the bullshit, all the bullshit we carry,
You've been forgiven. You know. Just leads me to another question,
(20:58):
like so eloquently put it, you have known your faith
for so long, and you have been in touch with
it for so long, But it is so easy to
want to go down the wrong roads or whatever. How
have you navigated that coming? Have you ever gotten lost
on the wrong path all the time? Check? How do you?
(21:26):
How do you navigate those situations? Because you always come back?
And I'm not like it's anything terrible, but you know
we all have we get lost. Absolutely agree. I I
was reading something tremendous that inspired me. Excuse me, and
I wish I could remember the author right now, but um,
(21:48):
it's a we are just living from moment to moment
of belief. We are just living like you can only
have enough faith for moment to moment, you know, like
that that's all you can't have. You don't have enough
faith for tomorrow and the next day and the next
(22:09):
day because you have no idea what that day brings.
You can only have We can only have faith from
this moment to the next moment, So we have to
live in the moment that yes, absolutely absolutely, I feel like,
oh my gosh, yeah, it's excruciating. Well, I'm trying a
new one right now called meditation, which I told you
(22:31):
about before we got on them is I and that
pretty much for me right now goes with three minutes
of Okay, just check your breathing. Just relax. I wonder
if I put the clothes from the washing machine into
the dry or not. Shut up. Just relax. I wish
(22:54):
diesel would stop scratching. It's a really distratched Just relax.
Oh my gosh, I need to get stamps. You know.
It's like all the just like laundry. List of things
goes in your mind crucial at that time, but it
doesn't matter at all, but really at all. It's so
you know, I feel like I do a variety of things.
I meditate, I pray. My my biggest one though, um,
(23:19):
it's just being around people who lift me up. That's
the biggest thing that I know I can do for myself.
I told you the other day I was I was
having one of those days. I had a day. I
woke up and I swear from the moment I opened
my eyes, somehow I had already been decided this day is.
(23:41):
You know, it's just not going to be a good day.
You know, you wake up and you're just like, yep,
let's just redo, you know, let's just let's start this
one over. And I thought I need to be with
some pure sunshine. And I texted Caroline and I was like,
what are you doing? Can I join you? What is happening?
(24:02):
I just need to be around someone I know that
we'll speak truth over my life, you know, And so
you're the one I go to and I need that
well right back at you. So glad we can both
you know, be that for each other. But that's man,
that is my main thing because those days that you
(24:23):
know and we have them, and it's good to be alone.
I'm not saying that sometimes you don't need to be alone,
because you do. Sometimes you need to be in your
thoughts spiraling. Absolutely absolutely put yourself around around someone else
who's you know, whose energy you can absorb and just
(24:44):
breathe with. You know, And um, I read things you
know reading right now, I'm reading this book that's awesome.
It's called You Are a Badass, and it's specifically about
stopping doubt, just nipping it in the butt because it's
kind of scary. You recently took a very large leap
(25:05):
of faith and yes, some people would say you'd be crazy.
You're away from a great paying jaw. Yes, to literally
pursue your artistry full for us. I want to talk
about that. That to me, when you walk in faith
(25:25):
that's strongly, that is like you're you're showing up for God.
You're saying, Okay, God, you put this calling on my heart.
I feel it and now I'm going to dive into
the abyss and just go for it. And that is
like the most terrifying thing ever because you don't know
what in the freaking world is going to happen, and
(25:46):
you're trusting, then you always go to the worst thing
you like. Mm hmm, no, Anklena, work ain't gonna happen.
I'm a blow up, you know. Somehow something just astronomically
wrong is going to happen, right, and you feel like
you could have potentially ruined your life and now you'll
be broke and living in your car. So tell me
about the leave of faith that you just did, because
(26:07):
obviously you have always been doing spoken work. It's always
been who you are. You've been speaking truth. You are
a truth speaker and you're also a healer. Thank you,
and I feel like that comes from your words. Thank you.
So tell me about what's happening now. Okay, life and career. So,
as you know, this was two months ago. Now I
(26:32):
quit my job. So it was a good job. It
was a good job. So the past four years I've
been in the music industry as um on the business
end I have. That's where we met, you know, we
met at Hit Shop Records, and I've been a everything
from a president's assistant to a office manager, to a
(26:56):
promo coordinator, to a artist manager to a you know,
wrangler of people and things and coffee and whatever the
f needs to get done, get it done kind of person.
And that's what we do. That's what we do, bo
bo get or done. Um. Yeah, And I feel like
(27:19):
I've been learning this get or done mentality, you know.
And you don't have to see the whole staircase to
take one step, you know. And if someone it taught
me so much in just figuring it out. What did
you learn from all those experiences because you knew that
wasn't your soul's calling, but it was kind of crucial
(27:41):
to go to school in learning the entertainment industry. Absolutely absolutely,
And that's exactly what what I thought about it as
I was like, you know what, this is my grad school.
You know, a lot of my friends went to grad school.
A lot of them have PhD s, a lot of
them are in medical school. This was my grad school.
This was my show up every day and get it done,
(28:06):
and show up every day and serve others. Yeah, you
have unworserving yourself. Really you have been. You have been
helping other people accomplish their dreams in learning along the
way and totally and learning a lot and learning, Oh
my gosh, I've had some really really really really awesome teachers,
and this last leap of faith came from UM. I
was actually a Southeast regional and I was working records,
(28:30):
and every day, wake up, and you put your best
foot forward, and no matter how many times you here know,
you keep asking the question, And no matter how many
times you here know you show up at their doorsteps
training camp, and no matter how many times you hear no,
you keep asking the question and you do it with
polite persistence. You know that was a skill set right there. Yeah, totally,
(28:56):
because you can't. It's like, you know, most people when
they get another like okay, runaway, never come back, hide
and corner cave and like just die. Totally. Well, it
taught me a lot because I'm not I don't know
if you know this, but I'm not like a pushy person.
I'm not like you know, okay, great, I'll come back tomorrow.
You know that record I'm talking about? So that record John,
(29:20):
did I mention your hair looks phenomenal? Today? I have
a record that I brought it here. It is how
are you with me? And I'll be like, hey, I know, okay, great,
I'll come back tomorrow. See you later. I love you too,
by because talk about being rejected on a daily basis
(29:42):
being a regional at a record label, well, you know
laws about that. I did it for six months and
I was like, I don't I couldn't last much longer.
It was the same thing, amazing learning opportunity. It taught
me how to navigate all different types of powerful personalities
because the record industry it there are opinionated, powerful people
(30:02):
who ain't budgeting in their thoughts, and you have to
navigate them because you have to be polite. It teaches you.
Then you kind of just become that and it's a
way better way of communicating. Yeah, and I learned a
lot just about having asked for what you want? You do,
don't you gotta ask for it? You can't do this
whole like shy sheepist thing. How did you learn how
(30:25):
to ask for what we want? What was the moment
when you realize that? H? Well, I mean, I guess
I've learned it in different ways throughout my entire life. Um,
but specifically as it relates to the music industry. UM,
I learned that if you don't show people who you are,
they will tell you who you're supposed to be, and
(30:48):
so you have to says an aha moment. Okay, can
you say that again? What did I say? You don't
show people who you are. If you don't show people
who you are, they will tell you who you're supposed
to be. And so I just knew that. Okay. All
I want to be as a tiebreaker and I know
(31:10):
that well, when someone is sitting there and they're thinking
about adding a record, I want them to have to
think about me and my artist, and I want them
to want to do it because they want to support
me and my artist, you know. And I want to
be someone who when people think of me, they think,
(31:33):
you know what, I'm gonna add her record because you
know what, she's just been really kind to me, or
you know she I used to just send random notes
all the time, just because we're all just people, you know,
we're all just freaking people trying to figure out our lives,
(31:55):
trying to figure out relationships and trying to figure you're out,
you know, how to do ship the right way, and
like doing none of us. You have all these people involved,
and you analyze yourself so much you think people hate you,
and it's just awful. You can just really go down
a rabbit hole. I know, I know you want to
(32:16):
be like, but then you've got to be authentic. So
how do you straddle that line of being liked and authentic?
M Because I feel like that is something I've sometimes
struggled with. Yeah, that's a really good question. I'm also
still learning that one. I feel like what I thought
(32:36):
of first when you said that was I've always wanted
to be the friend I want to have, you know,
like I want to I want people to want to
pick up the phone and call me because they just
need to hear a smiling face, or they just need
to hear a word, or maybe they need to hear
nothing at all. You know, I'm really good at just
(32:58):
being with people when they need someone to just be
with them and shut the funk up. You are, you know,
you intentionally choose the way your delivery towards people, Like
do you ever want to be like you're a stupid idiot,
You're so dumb? But then you're like, Okay, it's okay,
we're all human, we all make can here you come
with your wife? Do you ever filter it? Do you?
Or is it just how it comes out of you?
(33:20):
That's a good question. I'm sure m hmm, it comes
out of you like that. I think it just comes
out of me like that. I mean, I'm sure there
are times where I'm like this bitch, but you great
for people? Yeah, where did that come from? It's important
to extend grace to people. Um, a life lesson I learned. Um.
(33:44):
You know, in between that fourteen and eighteen period. Um,
you know where you're you're freaking out because you're, um,
your father is not in your household anymore. And this
vision you know of this man and this protector is
not the same vision that you once had, you know,
(34:05):
and it's changing, and it's scary, and it's you know,
all these things are happening to me. And and you
walk around and you realize you're carrying unforgiveness and you
realize you've got all these things in your backpack that
how the fund did they get there? Because I didn't
pack them in there. You know, you let other people
(34:26):
put shame and guilt and all that other shit that
we carry around because other people projected this and that
on us. And I'll never forget it. I was in
Ecuador and I wrote him a letter, and in that letter,
I swear I released everything I'm saying now, you know,
(34:49):
I just I just released it, and I decided that
I'm responsible for my feelings. I'm responsible for how I
impact the world, you know, and because someone else did
this or that doesn't have any bearing on how I
(35:11):
treat other people, you know. And you say that too.
You don't pick up other people's do you say that?
You don't you hear people's problems, You don't pick up
their trash. You said something, Yeah, well you you you
can't put other people's baggage and garbage in your backpack
and carried around for him. It's not yours, you know,
it's not yours to carry. Yeah, so you learned that forgetting.
(35:34):
I feel like, yeah, totally for him, and you released it. Yeah,
but you have to speak it, don't have to speak it.
And I mean, I still go back and forth, you know.
I'm I'm a little I'm a I'm a little girl.
You know. It's like, oh, well you didn't call me
on at twelve oh one on my birthday, you know,
or whatever. I want to get upset up. I still,
(35:56):
you know, have moments where I'm just in my feelings
and but for the most part, I think that going
through that period of my life really taught me to rely.
Like and then my dad dropped this piece of information
on me. He's like, you know what, Tomora, I'm I'm
(36:18):
just a steward, you know. I mean, yes, i'm your
father and I'll always be there, but I'm just a steward.
You know. I'm not supposed to be the one to
show you all these great wonders because you really have
to find them out for yourself. You know. It's kind
of freeing, scary, like pitting your stomach at the same
(36:40):
totally because I know, so that kind of set you
on your path to like, okay, like you realize your
dad was a flawed human, just like all of us are,
and you realize that all these people that you looked
up to they don't know any better than you do. Really,
so in that point of your age, you rely to yourself. Yeah. Yeah,
(37:03):
I mean what I would call in inner light, what
I call my gut, what I would call God, what
I would call you know, light supreme ultra violet rays
and beams and stuff, you know, like all like your
your core, you know, your wherever you gather that that
(37:26):
energy from that is like refreshing, you know, and it's
you don't have to be anything to be in its presence.
You just are you know what I mean, Um what
I would call that light? Yeah, it's a inner peace. Absolutely, absolutely,
it's you know, it's it's why people people strive for,
(37:51):
you know, joy and not happiness, because happiness, you know,
can change day to day, but joy that doesn't change. Okay,
So you're in this job, You're working records, you're talking
to radio p ds. You actually are part of the
promotion stuff that gets say number one song. Yeah, I
love this, I love this, crushing it at your job.
(38:13):
Just like doing this job, you're actually like killing it.
Yeah I was. I'm going to go right ahead to
honored to be a part of their team because I
have never met I was supposed to see that I
was supposed to see that rise. I was supposed to
see that magic. Because what Chris and Preston do when
(38:37):
they bring people into a room, Chris and Preston are
low cash. You are the only person in that room.
They understand that this is a business of relationships, and
they understand that if you bring people into your world
and make them feel a part of something, that when
that that time comes, they'll they'll lift you up, you know,
(38:58):
they'll lift you up to that number one spot. And
they value those relationships. They value them. And we saw that,
you know, and I got to be a part of
UM a gold record with I Love This Life and
a number one with I Know Somebody, and I UM,
I was just really blessed to have someone who believed
(39:21):
in me enough to say here's the Southeast, why don't
you go scurry along and take it. You know, I've
never done this before, I UM. But that that means
like you now are in charge of all the radio
stations in the Southeast getting them to add low cash
is singles. So it's like fly on girls. Yeah, absolutely,
(39:42):
And these are you know, these are these are guys
that people people love and and loved to support. When
that when that roller coaster, I say, it was like
you know, chicken towards chucking, towards the upswing. Um, but
it was it was an uphill battle, you know, and
(40:04):
it was a battle. And I feel like it just
taught me exactly she knows she's like girl, it was
a battle. WHOA, Yes, it was, um, but it also
you know, it makes those those moments so sweet and February,
you know, when you're sitting there and you're toasting them
(40:25):
and they're all sitting on stage talking about this wonderful
moment in their lives. You know, they haven't. They have
a number one record, you know, and no one will ever,
ever ever take that away from them. And they I
mean they should be. They should be proud, beyond beyond
(40:45):
belief of themselves because they never ever even talking about
never given up. There's never given up. And then there's
like low cash, never given up. They never gave up,
can't stop stop the whole time, and they absolutely your
(41:06):
big break and then you quit, yep, talking about that. Well,
um good segue. M hmm. Well, to be honest, um,
the number one if I know somebody, I know somebody
(41:29):
uh coincided with It was like that rise of that
song coincided with the decline of my grandmother's health. And
my grandmother turned on October and I flew into see her.
(41:49):
This was like, you know, this was the week that
we were you know, we went six to one, so
I think we were at six and you know, I
just told him, I was like, guys, act so this
was this is pushed, This is push week, okay, and
you know told, I told my boss is like, guys,
I I've got to be there. I've just got to
(42:11):
be there. I don't know how long we have. I
don't know if this is what this is, but I've
got to be there. And they were just like, go,
didn't even bat n. I UM, forever, forever grateful that
I went, you know, because we have so many moments
and our our grandparents lives and even our parents lives
were you know, a little little things happen here and there,
and we can't be there for everything. But um, I've
(42:33):
always felt that was one of my love languages, was
quality time. So I fly in. It's grandma's birthday. We
celebrate her birthday in the hospital, Like for real, think
about I can't even think about all the things she's seen.
She must think we are looking crazy. She's like, uh,
(42:56):
I grew up during the Great Depression and now there's
a phone that I can talk to my granddaughter on
and see her, you know. Anyway, So I UM. I
ended up staying in Baltimore for about a week, and
I'm glad I did because I would, you know, i'd
I'd work for a few hours and then I'd go
(43:17):
and just hang out with her, and we got to
the end of the week and I go back home
and two days later she passes. And I remember being
on a conference call um before I found out. I
(43:41):
remember we had a conference call. It was Monday, and
I said, you know, they were all asking, and Gator goes,
you know, so for all the people who've who have
just now gotten there, you know, first number one, how
does it feel? And I remember sitting in that for
a second and being like, you know, it feels good.
(44:07):
It feels great. You know, everyone's saying congratulations, and everyone's like,
oh my gosh, like high five, high fives from all around,
you know, Radio is actually calling me, you know, and
that it feels great. But it didn't feel how I
thought it would feel. How did you think it would feel?
(44:27):
Butterflies and rainbows and stickers and glitter and oh my gosh, yep,
just rooms of puppies, just rooms of puppies. Every hour,
new sets of puppies just coming on it, just fresh puppies,
Oh my gosh. And it didn't feel like that. And
I had to face a very real truth within myself,
(44:51):
which was, what are you doing this for? Who? Are
you doing this? Who are you doing this for? I
think I was doing it for a combination of people
within my building, um music mentors who had put me
in a position where I was in this position, you know,
(45:12):
and people that had just instilled so much belief in
me that I could do it, that I thought I
could do it, and I did it. I did it.
It felt good. It probably was validating. It was. It
was very validating. So that was probably a necessary thing
you needed to feel to validate that you actually have
this ability to make something started from the bottom and
(45:34):
go to the top in a real business world. Yeah,
it was hard, and afterwards, quite frankly, I needed a
fucking vacation. I was like, whoa lord, And then it
was like, okay, let's do it again. And I was
(45:56):
just like, you're like I had one in me. That
was it dropped the mic. Oh I'll catch y'all. I'll
watch you guys on the charts. You literally didn't think
you had another one in you. Well, like, I don't
know what I was thinking, honest lamar, like, what, You're
gonna get a number one and then they're going to
send you to Cancoon for a week and then you know,
(46:19):
but I just I just realized that I I feel
like I felt things too deeply. You know, when people
didn't call me back, I would be like, fuck, why
do they call me back? Like I'm a nice person
to talk to, and my nice person to talk maybe
I suck? People tell me I'm cool. No, you're not
(46:40):
that cool. You know what I mean? Do I know
what you mean? I have lived in that real tapes.
I think all artists mentality people and just oh's analyzing
and and I felt my true self, which is I'm
a I'm a feeling person. You know, I'm an artist
and I'm sense it if about my ship. As Ericabaidou said,
(47:04):
so why are you trying to put this square peg
into a round hole? And you wrote like a spoken
word song about this? Okay, what's that one called? Um? Well,
I've got to call it inner. Oh it's I don't know,
it's called interlude? Right now? Can you give us a
little bit of that? Um? But it starts um? Wake up,
(47:25):
get dressed, go to work nine to five until it hurts. Well,
that really don't work for me. Wake up, get happy,
do your job. Nine to five is all a blur
that really don't work for me. It's time to let
my passion do the talking. Nine to five. Stop fucking
with my creativity. Because while I'm ever so grateful, I
always wanted to be able to put food on the table,
(47:48):
support my family and those of y'all who've been with me.
But deep beside, it's killing me. My soul cries, It
is killing me. It's killing me. Yeah, m m m
mmm mm hmmm mm hmm. But my soul cries every
time that nine five takes over. Seems so summer days over.
Want to go back to tempy tall on Daddy's shoulders
those days. See, I never knew what I had to
(48:10):
do to be the better me. See music betters me,
makes me a better person, makes it all come together
and feel worth it. Yes, you were worthy and the
journey's worth it. Just keep working. Eyes on your purpose,
listen to yourself, keep your eyes on your purpose. Mm
hmm yeah yeah, did that? I feel like I should
call it eyes on your Purpose. That's more like I
(48:32):
like eyes on your purpose. Did that come to you
in that season? Was screaming just came? Well? You and
I had had a dream board session. We had one
of the most spiritual experiences probably. Actually, it was the
most spiritual experience I've had, was that moment with you. Yeah.
I needed to I needed to dream. Oh man, I
(48:53):
just I was in this moment of It was December four,
it was my mother's birthday. I'll never forget it was
your mom's birthday. It was my mom's birthday. I know, right.
You had just come home from something and you're like
and you just texted me out of the blue and
you're just like, hey, you won't have a sleepover. And
I was like, oh, you're not to sleepover in so long.
(49:14):
It's like, yeah, let's go have a sleepover. And I
was already thinking like, okay, we can dream board. This
will be great because I was needing some help articulating
what this calling, what this purpose is because I felt it,
and it's so it can be so frustrating when you
feel it and you you know that it's coming and
you know it will be revealed to you, but it's
(49:34):
never fast enough. It's never fast enough, and every day
you wake up and you're like, it's this thing. It's
just burning, and it's this thing. It makes your heart beat,
it makes you know, what makes you just it makes
you sweat and feel amazing and I couldn't articulate it,
and I was like, okay, and you texted me, as
(49:55):
you know, we often flow with each other when we
just need some sort of something, you know, from one another,
and yeah, I get over here and I've got my
notebook check you know, I've got I was like, I don't.
I don't know what I was thinking we were going
to do, but what happened I never could have imagined,
(50:17):
you know what I mean. Like I was literally thinking, Okay,
We're gonna like cut out scrap books and I'm gonna like,
you know, put things like summer and you know, bikinis
and like, you know, I want to be on an
island somewhere. And I don't know what I thought it
would be, but it was. It really was magical because
you just started asking me the questions I needed to
(50:38):
ask myself, and I finally had the time to think
about them. You know. We started that session at like
nine at nine, and we went to like four in
the morning, and then it was like, Okay, go to sleep. Okay,
we have to go to sleep. Okay, we have to
go to sleep. Yeah, it was crazy, because it was crazy.
I think you hadn't realized how your spoken word get
(51:02):
is actually your career. You've been doing it as you
knew you loved it, but like you hadn't quite gone
all in totally totally. And I started, you know, Caroline
was like asking me questions, you know, when you're like, well,
what what is you know? What what are you really
(51:23):
good at? You know, it was something really dumb, you know,
it was really straightforward and done, like well what are
you really good at? And I was just like, I
don't know, spucking word? And you were like you was
spoken word that ship, And I was like what? And
you could always like spoken words just in life, like
you almost speak in spoken words just in real life.
(51:43):
That's awesome. Then you say, oh, I just have notebooks
and notebooks and notebooks have spoken word, and I just
have recordings all the notes on my phone and recorded
basically a full album already. You're just kind of doing
it on the side. But you have these amazing master
piece songs that are like spoken word, and you have
some collaps with some singers and some beats like this creation,
(52:06):
and it's just like, oh yeah, I just have all
this just sitting here, Like who just has all that
just sitting there and spoken word. You know, that is
not like a common thing. I know when when we
when we discovered it, it was kind of like, gosh,
you're this is like you just can't see it. What
happened was, yeah, that's just you know, yeah, I don't
(52:31):
even know what to call that. What did you feel
after that moment that, like, how did you feel? Because
like that moment, I feel like you decided to pursue
it for I felt an insane amount of just purpose.
You know. There's I feel like there's always that feeling
in the morning of I want to wake up and
I want to be jolted out of bed. I'm I'm
(52:53):
so excited to do what I was made to do,
you know. And it was for the first time, it
was a really ease. It was a release of all
the stress I had been carrying thinking that. And this
is something that Tyler helps me with all the time.
That's my boyfriend. He always says, you have the right
(53:13):
to change your mind. And I've been holding on to,
you know, all these expectations of who I felt I
was supposed to be in the professional world, you know,
and and I mean a lot of my artists don't
even really know that I've had this stuff on side
because I understand the importance of what I was doing
was to be there, you know, and it wasn't really
(53:35):
to shine a light on whatever this is that was happening.
Because I needed this to happen inside of me, and
I needed to come to it by myself, you know,
I really needed to. And even if you're you know,
even if your path is this, we get so frustrated
that it's not like this, like even if it's like this,
(53:57):
like holy moley, I mean, I feel like the knowledge
that I've accrued in the last five years being in
this town is it's invaluable and it's exactly what I
needed to propel me. Before you were ready to launch.
You needed to go to school, Yeah, absolutely, school of
(54:18):
hard knocks. Go ahead, Okay, Yeah, you're gonna be. You're
gonna be. You're gonna be like my puff daddy, Like
I'm gonna have you come on the track and just
be like uh huh huh yeah, because I have swaged
like daddy. Yes, Okay, we're exactly the same. Like I'm
(54:45):
so cool. He is I could never even try. He's
so bad. Yeah, so tell me what's happening next? Okay,
so we have a debut together. This podcast is actually
going through here. We made a agreement that night, wrote
we made an agreement that night that you were going
(55:06):
to have a big Nashville showcase because you've been doing
this and you've been pursuing it kind of quietly and
like doing stuff. But like we made an agreement that
we were going on your birthday, we were going to
have a show. Well, you were going to the show,
but like obviously I was in this with you because
we were like grabbing this thing together and my podcast.
(55:29):
I'm having a podcast like little launch party on May
seventeenth and guests who the featured performers, who am Hall
It's so cool And it was like they when I
got the party and the launch thing together. Randomly, I
even tried to change it to May tenth because I
didn't think I was I didn't want to skip a
(55:50):
week with podcasting. My schedule wasn't lining up. But she
was a woman in charge of everything, was like, no,
we really need to be on seventeenth. I was like okay,
and then everything fell into line. This interview you and
I phone into line, you performing phone to line and
then I looked at the date and it was May
freaking seventeen. Cannot believe that that's not God, just like
(56:13):
drop the mic. If that is not God, then I
don't know what is it gives. I cannot think about
it too hard because it's just it's just magic, you know.
I feel like when most of the time, when things
are happening as they're supposed to happen, it just feels
(56:36):
it feels like breathing, you know, it just feels natural,
and it feels like magic happens in pretty magical moments.
I want people to feel that because you have to
have faith, and you have to be brave, and you
have to quit your job after you just got like
basically two back to back number one and you're crushing
in at your very well high paid, respectful job. You
(56:57):
have been going to quit with no with no freaking
pair shoot and yep, and no more bi weekly payments
and yep, oh my gosh. If But but it seems
so crazy because this whole time I was so caught
up on like, how are you going to say no
to this? You know what I mean? How are you
going to walk away from bi weekly payments? And when
(57:20):
I think about that measured up to what I really
want to do, you know, and how I want to
impact the world. It's just fluff, you know, it's just
would not let we got one? Why would you not
let your soul sing? Let your freak flag fly? Let
it fly? And another thing, this is another tyler ism. Gosh,
(57:46):
he is always saying that the teacher is the teacher
because they've failed the most times, so they know they've
they've tried it hot, you have it on your board.
No fear, all faith, you know, Like we get so
caught up in that initial like, well, a lot of
people don't like it. What if I, oh my gosh,
(58:06):
and I'm not gonna you know what I mean, This
podcast is a leap of faith. People are gonna hate it, right,
look like an idiot. And it's like, if you don't
get past that initial feeling of I can't breathe, you
won't do anything. You won't do anything, You won't you
have to be so prepared for people to laugh at
(58:27):
you and everything to fall apart. But that also comes
from knowing that you're following, you're calling and trusting in
the higher force more than the external world that we
live in. And that is what I call a leap
of faith. What does that quote? Yeah, you got You
haven't got to read this quote straight up said this.
She's gonna say. I was on enough. It was a
(58:50):
you're right, we were. We were flowing because I had
just walked away from an incredible opportunity in the music industry,
like signed a record deal and everything, and I walked
away to pursue hosting and this podcast or like what
what is it? I didn't even know what a podcast was. Oh,
let me start my podcast and long away from major
label record deal because that's smart, know whatever. But I
(59:13):
knew it. Like how you felt you were dying in
your job being a regional, I was dying in this
record deal and I knew it wasn't my calling. So
we had this quote. He said, I know that even
though I didn't know where I was going, I knew
the moment I was walking away from a great opportunity
that there was a greater one in front of me.
That's what I call a leap of faith. That's what
(59:34):
you just did, girl, And the world will know your name,
Amara Hall, because you will change the world for the
greater good. And you have so much love. You have
so much grace, you have so much you have. You
have the ability to make people want to forgive themselves,
to forgive other people, and then march on to be
the better version of themselves. You have that ability. You
(59:55):
are a healer. I've said it from the second I
met you. You take people where they are. You don't
get mad at them for their flaws and the terrible
things they've done. You wrap them in your arms and
you go, Okay, we're gonna we're gonna be great together.
Makes want to cry because that's how much I believe
in you and I know what you're supposed to do.
And I said, mark my words, the first woman black
(01:00:16):
president will probably be here within the next twenty years.
I was saying, I pray sooner you will be at
the inaugural address. I know we totally have that vision.
You will. Hey, I accept that. I know you will,
and I have to be your day. Can you imagine?
I will imagine? I see it. I know. Oh my gosh, girl,
(01:00:37):
they got a real better on these rolls. I mean,
I just yeah, okay, let's do it. What's twenty years
from now? Hopefully I'll be sooner. But I stay within twenty,
that will happen, and by then you will be like
deep into your career. You and Alicia Keys have done
tons of class because you are twins. I feel like
(01:00:59):
I can't even tell about Alicia Keys because I dream
about her, like I literally think we're already friends. You
are y'all cut from the same cloth. It's that weird.
A soul knows when it meets someone it is supposed
to be with. You know. She wrote a song called
Superwoman and it goes because ah am superma, Yes I am,
(01:01:26):
Yes you are, even when I'm a mess stupid on
a vest within us so much as oh, yes I'm
a super woma. And I was reading an interview and
she said she wrote that song because she needed to
hear that song. And that's what you do. That's how
I feel, you know. Okay, so we're gonna wrap up.
(01:01:48):
Leave your light. You're just a ball of inspiration, Like
everything you say is inspiring. You are inspiration to me.
You are just bright light. Thank you. So this is
gonna be hard to ask you to just pick some
piece of inspiration, but leave some inspiration of how you've
been inspired or how you want to inspire people. Um M, hmm.
(01:02:14):
I would say as someone who has a very creative side,
and it is very conscious of the fact that I
am surrounded by so many bright lights. You know, we
are in such a super super saturated city of bright
lights us. How awesome for us. I'm glad you said
(01:02:38):
that instead of what I sometimes think, which is, oh gosh,
I hope my light will shine just as bright as there's.
You know, we get like we we start doubting yourself.
You start doubting yourself. See all these other people shining
so bright. I would I want to leave you with right,
(01:02:59):
with no one intension of making it great, to all
my creative people out there, do it for the love,
you know, right, with no intention of making it great.
You know, don't We go onto all these rooms with
these people who have all these accolades, and they've done this,
and they've done that, and they've taken it to this
place and that place, and we forget we are but vessels.
(01:03:23):
We are here. We are here to leave, to leave
you know, our our voice, you know, and and our perspective,
and no one else can do you like you do
you nobody, And that should give you the greatest confidence
to pursue what you know you're meant to do for
sure really agrees. Okay, so take us out of one
(01:03:48):
last spoken word, okay, taking you out m hm m
hm m hm um. It's a couple of things that
I'm sure of the hardest steps to take are the
first ones, the ones that will break your heart if
you don't try, you don't try or even go for it.
So baby, go for it and don't wait for who
(01:04:10):
they want you to be. Probably ain't that great, you know.
The trials that you beat are the ones you face
head on, sweaty palm saying, please Lord today, give me
the courage, because it's gotta be today. I gotta make
a change. There's gotta be a way for me to
find a sense of freedom, hiding in the mundane, to
keep believing that I'm doing the right thing. Peacema Hal
(01:04:34):
y'all come see us at Aurora downtown Nashville on her
birthday turning thirty May sevent it's going to be it's
gonna be her Nashville Showcase, and it's gonna rock your
face in your world. See all there care. I know
(01:04:55):
you guys loved that episode. I loved it. It was
one of my favorite episodes I've ever done. I love
Mr our Hall. Next week, you guys, I have Lou
Taylor joining me. Lou Taylor is the CEO of Trystar Entertainment.
It's a business entertainment group and she is a badass batch.
This woman gets it done with grace, with style, with heart,
(01:05:16):
with faith. She does not take any shye from anyone,
and she is just such an example of how to
be a strong, powerful woman. I love her so much
so next week join me for Lou Taylor
Host
Caroline Hobby
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