Ray's Medical Emergency In Mexico

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
On I owe you an apology. We did do the
intro twice, confirmed on the Facebook, and.

Speaker 2 (00:11):
We had one guy give up. He said it was
too hard to listen to us do the intro twice.
I'm like, that was hard to I thought it was funny.
I mean, so I.

Speaker 1 (00:22):
Knew the math of it, and I said that.

Speaker 3 (00:23):
So you're telling me ninety six percent of the podcast
was an absolute failure if you left after five percent.

Speaker 2 (00:30):
Of it, yeah, wow. Well, Also, I feel like that
makes us look human. We're not. We're not professional broadcasters.
We make mistakes. We could edit that out and make
us sound perfect, but no, I genuinely blanked and did
not think we did the intro. I'm sorry he.

Speaker 1 (00:45):
Who was it on Twitter?

Speaker 3 (00:46):
Was it Paul Jael Timothy, the guy that came to
the convention.

Speaker 2 (00:50):
I think it's Paul sore losers Paul.

Speaker 3 (00:52):
My only comment on that is he hit me at
and he goes, hey, man, it used to be a
huge fan of the podcast. Ray doesn't give it as
all anymore, Like, Paul, what the fuck, dude.

Speaker 1 (01:01):
This isn't my main job.

Speaker 3 (01:02):
Imagine your job, whatever it is you do. You're a
truck driver, You're a farmer. Are you I didn't even
remember him telling us at the convention. Imagine if you
did that and then you had a little bit of
funner of a farm job afterwards. But it's not that fun.
But it's kind of fun, but you had to do
it for an hour. Are you gonna do full energy? Yes,

(01:22):
we've reduced it to forty five, or are you gonna
be kind of tired from the farm job you already
had and on that I'll hang up and listen.

Speaker 2 (01:30):
I wouldn't even say it's that right. Some days it's
better than others. It's any job you do. You're not
gonna be one hundred percent every single day. Look at
how much we put into it. We went on vacation
and we put out a new pod every single day
we were gone and normal. There was no hey, thanks dude,

(01:53):
No Paul. We still like you, Paul, and I know
you're still listening like so, we appreciate you, and we'll
see you in januey at the convention. I know maybe
you were just in a bad mood that day, something
was going wrong, you had a bad day at work.
You haven't been able to listen because you've been swamped
at work. So you've been missing our jokes.

Speaker 1 (02:09):
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (02:10):
And then Justin hits me with Wednesday's pod on vacation. Hilarious,
Fridays Man, Thanks, that's okay.

Speaker 1 (02:18):
Appreciate the in person review.

Speaker 2 (02:19):
No, I do like the review. And Batter's Box he
gave me a review on Wednesday's pod. He said, everybody
he goes Ray is an idiot. He goes, Ray had
the eleventh pick. I had the fifth pick. How the
did Ray think he was going to get the same
players of me during the draft? How was he using

(02:42):
my draft as a blueprint when we were drafting nowhere
near the same position? Like? How stupid is Wray to
think he was gonna be able to get the same players?
He goes it was hilarious. Hey, And then he said,
could you guys, for the love of God, learn how
to pronounce player's name?

Speaker 3 (03:00):
Yeah, Karen Williams Kyron Batter's Box listen. I said, I
was going after your position picks, not your exact players.
I loved how you went running back, running back, wide receiver,
running back, running back, then quarterback, and so on and
so forth. That is what I was going after. The methodology.

Speaker 1 (03:20):
Well, he took it as you were trying to draft
the same players.

Speaker 3 (03:22):
Well, I kind of was, damn it. I never confined crap.
I need a producer. They put out the fifteen players
you shouldn't draft.

Speaker 2 (03:31):
Oh please tell me.

Speaker 1 (03:32):
Well guess what. I can't Darren find it because I
don't have a producer.

Speaker 2 (03:36):
Well, here's the problem. The drafts are already.

Speaker 3 (03:38):
Over, and you want to know the other problem is
which was the reason I was going to bring it
up on that list? Karen Williams, you had Batter's Box,
You dumbasses. They said they're gonna be bus Karen Williams
is gonna be a.

Speaker 2 (03:50):
Puzz Oh No, what site was it on?

Speaker 1 (03:53):
Man? I thought it was on Sports Center? And that's all.

Speaker 2 (03:56):
Here's the problem. I don't have Sports Center anymore. I'd
go to TV last night. I let me check out
what's on ESPN the US Open, Let me watch some tennis.

Speaker 1 (04:05):
Don't knock it?

Speaker 2 (04:07):
And it said that it says, sorry, we are in
a contract dispute. Our ESPN contract has run out. It
is no longer available on your TV. What the is
going on? You're telling me this weekend? I can't sit
down and turn on a college football game on ESPN
because they're in a contract dispute.

Speaker 3 (04:27):
To make things worse, we come to work and Direct TV.
We have a message.

Speaker 1 (04:31):
That's what I have.

Speaker 2 (04:32):
I have Direct TV. Direct TV's contract with Disney, the
owner of this channel, has expired. Our company is losing money.
We appreciate your patience while we negotiate to offer you
your greater flexibility, choice and value. Visit tv promise dot
com for more information. Oh that is exactly what I

(04:52):
have on my TV screen when I turned to ESPN.

Speaker 3 (04:55):
Dude, I thought I hurt stopped paying the bill. That
is a contract issue with companies. Yes, got it.

Speaker 2 (05:00):
So I no longer have ESPN. So whatever college football
games on ESPN this weekend. Guess who can't watch this?

Speaker 1 (05:06):
Guy? Texas two thumbs. Ray wallcums up my asshole.

Speaker 2 (05:11):
Michigan Texas is on ESPN.

Speaker 1 (05:12):
Yep, damn right it is. No, it's probably ABC.

Speaker 2 (05:16):
Oh man, No, Ray, I'm going to a local pub.
We got to get into the vacations. I already freaking
teased it. Dude, I cannot if I don't understand that.
Uh what channel? Oh God? If it's on ESPN.

Speaker 3 (05:31):
Unscrewed, guys, this is what I teased on the Instagram.
I said, the next podcast, and it's a Mexican flag, uh,
Margarita and you and a waterfall? And I said what
lunchbox did under the waterfall? And Raymundo lost in Mexico.

Speaker 2 (05:48):
I can't wait to hear it. Let's see. Doesn't tell
me you don't know how.

Speaker 3 (05:55):
To use a phone? Use a damn Google. I bet
I find it in two seconds.

Speaker 2 (05:59):
How to watch Fox?

Speaker 1 (06:01):
Okay?

Speaker 2 (06:01):
Then eleven am Saturday?

Speaker 1 (06:03):
Whoa, whoa, that's a musty TV.

Speaker 2 (06:06):
I did not know it was that early.

Speaker 3 (06:08):
You know what's at Sex thirty, Vanderbilt and Acorn six
thirty in the morning. At night, Oh, and guess who's
going to a justin? He bought ten tickets drunk the
other night.

Speaker 2 (06:20):
Wait wait, wait, he's going to the game with ten?
How much that cost him? Fifty dollars?

Speaker 1 (06:24):
They were ten inach. He costs me one hundred bucks drunk.

Speaker 2 (06:26):
That's not bad. Does he have ten friends to take?

Speaker 1 (06:29):
Well? I told him he has a poker group at
the clubhouse. I said, start with them. Bazer mer out.

Speaker 2 (06:34):
Wow, you're not gonna go Anchor down.

Speaker 1 (06:36):
Baser just didn't want to pull up.

Speaker 2 (06:38):
Oh you know who wants to go. Marco from the
Bronx will go. He sent us an email, coachers, how's
it hanging? Listen, I'll be in Nashville this weekend looking
to check out the play. What this place is all about?
Where are we watching Sunday football at? Because I got
money burning a hole in my pocket and I'm gonna
pull up. Keep it real, gentlemen, and let's go Yankee

(07:00):
Marco from the Bronx. Hey, Marko from the Bronx. You
want to go to the Vandy game? Hit up justin.
But your Yankees they're pitching staff sucks. You guys aren't
going to the World Series because you can't freaking pitch
your closer.

Speaker 1 (07:15):
Holmes.

Speaker 2 (07:16):
Holmes be sucking. He's about to be home, Liss. He's
about to be without homes because he can't close a
damn game.

Speaker 1 (07:24):
We gotta intro the show and then we got to
get to our vacation.

Speaker 3 (07:26):
There's not enough time, I know, because I know you're
gonna take forty five minutes of it, am.

Speaker 1 (07:32):
I Yeah, to tell your stories.

Speaker 2 (07:35):
Ray, I walk around the corner and that's when I
got kicked in the ass by a jack mule. Oh
and that didn't happen to me.

Speaker 1 (07:45):
Okay, well we're gonna intro.

Speaker 3 (07:46):
We're gonna do a live Arnold Yea with a vacation
Nabby's house.

Speaker 1 (07:51):
That's called a steakcage in your dumb ass. Okay, gotcha,
we made on that sexy time. All right, if we
have time, we can get to your vacation. We're gonna
do a live.

Speaker 2 (08:03):
Wait oh, the one, two, three, Sore Losers, What up, everybody?
I am lunchbox. I know the most about sports, so
I'll give you the sports facts, my sports opinions, because
I'm pretty much a sports genius.

Speaker 1 (08:17):
Yeah it says, and I'm from the North. I'm an
alpha male.

Speaker 3 (08:19):
I live on the north side of Nashville with Baser,
my wife, white picket fence.

Speaker 1 (08:22):
We do have two point two acres.

Speaker 3 (08:23):
Saw us signed the other day for three point six acres,
but it was towards the mall, a little bit more
populated area. Probably gonna be around a million dollars. If
anybody has that's sitting around a nest egg, consider purchasing it.
Hit me up on Sore Loser's account, one of our Instagram's,
our Facebook or our Twitter x. We will hopefully take
those offers there and helpfully get you guys get that property.
I will be the broker, only taking a one percent

(08:45):
of it.

Speaker 1 (08:46):
Uh, bro, don't know what. I digress over to you, coach,
happy baking.

Speaker 2 (08:49):
Coach, your happy vacation. Feels good to be back. I mean,
I know we got back earlier this week, but let
me tell you him. I went to a little place
called Iceland, and I'll be honest with you, I didn't
even know where Iceland was until you showed me on
the map a day before I left.

Speaker 3 (09:05):
Not really important for going to places, but continue.

Speaker 2 (09:08):
My wife came to me and she was like, hey,
my parents are willing to watch the kids for all
week and they for it. No, no, unfortunately not, she said.
They said this is probably the only time they're going
to do that. What is that referencing, Well, they said
they're getting older. It's hard to watch three kids for
a whole week because it takes a lot of energy.

(09:28):
So we were like, Okay, if we're going to do
something for a week, do something we've never done. So
she picked Iceland because her sister had been to Iceland
and said it was amazing, it was beautiful. So we
book Iceland and it's really not even that far from here,
which I didn't know. You fly to Minneapolis, or you
can fly to New York. We flew to Minneapolis, got

(09:48):
on a plane, and from Minneapolis it's only five and
a half hours to Iceland.

Speaker 1 (09:53):
All right, get out of America.

Speaker 2 (09:54):
Well here's the problem, Ray, So get this Nashville Broadway
ever drive down it in the morning. We're flying over
night from Minneapolis to Iceland. So when we land in Iceland,
it's seven am in the morning.

Speaker 1 (10:06):
Brutal with only a week vacation from the Big show.

Speaker 2 (10:09):
Rough and so we had it planned out. We're gonna
go to the Blue Lagoon, which is right outside the airport.

Speaker 3 (10:15):
That's the place all the Instagram models do. They got
their hangers out there in their thongs, they got their
ass up. It looks like it's just them at the lagoon.
Really there's probably a thousand people.

Speaker 2 (10:23):
Around, probably a thousand people, but it's got blue water.
It's like a hot you know, pool spa thing. I
don't really understand what it is. Ry.

Speaker 1 (10:30):
I saw the picks during my research of Iceland.

Speaker 2 (10:32):
No, I didn't do the research. That's one thing. My
wife did all the research. She did all the planning.

Speaker 3 (10:37):
Well, the first time you told me Iceland, I said, dongpicks, girls,
whale tails, hangars at that place where the water's teeth.

Speaker 2 (10:42):
Yeah, blue lagoon. We're like, all right, great. Day before
we're about to leave for Iceland, we wake up this
breaking news. There is a volcano erupting in Iceland. There
is a volcano. The lava is coming out of the
volcano in Iceland. And I'm like, you have got to
be kidding me. We're really gonna be shut down from

(11:03):
our vacation because there's a damn active volcano. And they said,
but don't worry, travel on as you usually do. Iceland
is open for visitors. Like, all right, we're still going
to Iceland.

Speaker 1 (11:14):
Yeah, you better check those tectonic plates.

Speaker 2 (11:16):
Hey, we went to the tectonic plates? Right, were we
part of the ring of fire? Did you know about
tectonic plates? I just geography had back in the day.
Don't care culture. Did you know that is the only
place where there's two tectonic plates in all of the world? Right?

Speaker 1 (11:30):
Did you know that we're on a can fault line
here in Nashville.

Speaker 2 (11:33):
Didn't even know what tectonic plates were? Right?

Speaker 1 (11:35):
Check your can sidewalks. We're on a can fault line. Ray,
this is the ring of fire. It's not ring, it's
out Johnny Cash Ray. You know Broadways a fault line. Yeah,
for getting picked up.

Speaker 2 (11:47):
So we get on the plane from Minneapolis to Iceland.
And if you go to sleep right, then you get
five and a half hours of sleep.

Speaker 3 (11:55):
Things you're saying about sleep ain't happening. Bezers already putting
down two mimosa's. She doesn't let me sleep.

Speaker 2 (12:00):
On an overnight flight. You have to because you're gonna
hit the ground at seven am. You're not gonna be
able to check in the hotel. So you got nothing
to do.

Speaker 1 (12:05):
Okay, it's not amazing, race, you'll have time. Continue.

Speaker 2 (12:08):
So we're going to Blue Lagoon at nine thirty. So
I'm like, all right, I get on, I have a
snack and I'm like, alight, I'm gonna catch some z's,
I'm gonna lean my seat back, I'm gonna go to bed. Right.
I hit that button, No, nope, it didn't move. All right,
let me try that again. And my wife's like, I
think you're pushing it wrong. Push the like outside of
the button. I'm like, all right, press the button. Nothing,

(12:30):
and she's leaned back. She's got, you know, her head,
ready to go to sleep. And I'm like, man, mine's
not moving. So the fly excuse me?

Speaker 1 (12:37):
Certainly?

Speaker 2 (12:38):
Am I doing this wrong? I can't see him to
get it to go back. Goes, yeah, give me one second,
I'll get it. I'll get it to lean back for you.

Speaker 3 (12:43):
Typical response, won't help you, then pushes it off. That's America.

Speaker 2 (12:47):
He goes and drops off the lady's coke. Maybe it's
a coke zero, I'm not sure. And he comes back.
He goes here, stand up for a second. I'll do
it for you.

Speaker 1 (12:54):
Stand up here, man, give me a hug.

Speaker 2 (12:56):
And he's like, oh, let me. Why don't you just
lean over on your wife? And I'm like, no, no, that's
not comfortable. He tell you to bend over to and no,
he did not tell me that. But so he presses
the button and was like boom, oh wait, man, that's
really not moving. Boomy bangs against it again.

Speaker 1 (13:09):
And he's just sitting there banging your chair.

Speaker 2 (13:12):
He's banging my chair, banging my hair.

Speaker 1 (13:14):
We want to start to the trip.

Speaker 2 (13:16):
He's giving it some force, right.

Speaker 1 (13:17):
What's next? He's just gonna jump on your wife. Yeah, sir,
if that helps the seat, by all means.

Speaker 2 (13:25):
He's trying to fix it, leaned over on your wife
doing the humpy motion. I usually have to do this, man,
just to get it right. Like, this's really what This
will get the seat work. And trust me, I'm.

Speaker 1 (13:35):
Sure no worries whatsoever. Do you want this thing to recline,
then don't hate.

Speaker 2 (13:40):
I am not violating your wife. This is how you
get the seat going. You gotta do this motion. The
thrusting motion you're just standing your wife is just collateral damage.
I would be doing this even if your wife wasn't
sitting right there by.

Speaker 1 (13:53):
What are you looking at? Buddy? Fuck you? All right?

Speaker 2 (13:58):
And so he does a couple more times. He goes,
I gotta be honest with you, man, I don't think
it's gonna lean back. Oh no, I'm like, you have
got to be kidding me. So I'm supposed to try
to sleep sitting straight up. Possible, but difficult, but very difficult. Man,
not very comfortable, all right. It's off to a bad
start the volcano, but they say travel on. Now. My

(14:18):
seat doesn't recline. Cool, So I try to sleep and
my head keeps falling, you know that bouncing motion because
you can't lean it back, so off and on. I
sleep whatever, not a very good night of sleep.

Speaker 1 (14:29):
Are we in Iceland? Yet?

Speaker 2 (14:30):
We land at seven am?

Speaker 1 (14:32):
Thank god?

Speaker 3 (14:33):
Here we go ten minutes in here. Oh sorry, I'm
not tying you. I'm just curious about the vacation. Are
we in Iceland?

Speaker 1 (14:40):
Yet?

Speaker 2 (14:40):
We're in Iceland. We're in the Iceland airport. Welcome to Iceland.
And I am like, wow, it is beautiful out here.

Speaker 1 (14:47):
Ice picks and shit.

Speaker 2 (14:48):
You gotta go through customs and I'm like, all right, man,
before I go through customers. We go through customs, I'm like,
I really got to take a crap. I gotta I
gotta take a crap. And was like, all right, I'll
get it a cup of coffee and wait for you.
So I go in the bathroom and I go in
the first doll and there's two stalls. I go on
the first doll and I lift up the lid and

(15:08):
I have never seen so much crap and toilet that
were clogged in a toilet in my life.

Speaker 1 (15:12):
Well, not using that one.

Speaker 2 (15:14):
I'm like, all right, slam that sucker down, not ye
cleaning crew. So I'm like, all right, let me go
in the one next to it.

Speaker 1 (15:21):
Yeay, Hey, Icelandic bitch.

Speaker 2 (15:24):
So I go in the second stall and I lift
the lid and the water almost splashes out on my
shoe with floating poop in it.

Speaker 1 (15:34):
Well, if that ain't a glacier floater, I don't know
what is.

Speaker 2 (15:37):
They said, Well, God bless America, this is Iceland. I
guess they don't have toilets that work. I guess toilets
there can't flush crap. Hey, Titanic, get over here and
fix this shit glacier. So then I'm like, all right,
I gotta go to a different bathroom. So I go
upstairs and I'm mummons, I know. I go up to
where the departures are where you check in for your flights.
Find a bathroom, you know what I mean? It has

(15:59):
one stall. I'm yes, all right, here we go go
in there. Guess what ray clogged toilet?

Speaker 1 (16:07):
Dude, it must be a thing plumbing and eat them there.

Speaker 2 (16:09):
They must not have pipes that can handle poop. Well
wait till they see the fucking mayflower you're about to
pump into it. I mean I've I've been holding this
thing overnight.

Speaker 1 (16:19):
I got a rat trap. It's about the fucking blue
didn't sir, sir?

Speaker 2 (16:25):
We are under your evacuation warning a volcano.

Speaker 1 (16:28):
I'm about the bull too, Mo the fucker. You think
that LoVa is going high, you just wait. You think
love is.

Speaker 2 (16:36):
Low and you wait to see the crap come out
of my ass work both about the blow. I'm like,
you know what, let's just go take your coffee to go,
Let's go get the rental car.

Speaker 3 (16:48):
I know we're not gonna get to it, but I
couldn't have any bigger parallels with your having to go
to the bathroom and we won't get to it because
you're gonna take thefty minutes.

Speaker 1 (16:56):
No, take a break.

Speaker 2 (16:58):
We're gonna get to it. We're gonna take a break.

Speaker 1 (17:00):
Do we have parallels? And I'll tell you what happened
over at the rental car place right after this.

Speaker 2 (17:08):
Walk.

Speaker 1 (17:08):
Did you go walk?

Speaker 2 (17:09):
No? I walk across the parking lot, go check in,
get the rental car, get the keys. I'm my honey,
I gotta go. I got to go. So I go
in the bathroom. They have a bathroom that works. Everything
comes out great, and I'm like, all right, So we
get in the car and We're like, all right, let's say,
let's type in the uh let's type in the address

(17:32):
for Blue Lagoon. She types it.

Speaker 1 (17:34):
In, Honey, does this car got a squeak?

Speaker 2 (17:36):
And she types in. She goes, We're twenty two minutes
from Blue Lagoon. I'm like, all right, let's start this vacation.
And then she goes, oh, wait, hold on, I got
an email, and she checks her email. She goes, oh,
it says the Blue Lagoon is canceled, is closed today
because of poor air quality due to the volcano. Okay,

(17:57):
so we are now in Iceland. We've been there for
forty five minutes and everything has gone wrong. My seat
doesn't recline, every toilet is overflown with crap. Now the
Blue Lagoon is canceled because there is a volcano right
a mile from there and the air quality is so
bad you can't be in the Blue Lagoon. And I'm like, well, golly,
I don't know where this volcano is. You drive out

(18:20):
of the airport. Ray, there's the damn volcano. I see
the lava shooting out.

Speaker 1 (18:24):
Well, get out your N ninety five masks. No, so
we start, let's go check it out.

Speaker 2 (18:29):
I'm like, this is so cool, and we drive around.

Speaker 1 (18:32):
We're gonna take a picture of me next to this
red stuff? A what is that?

Speaker 2 (18:37):
Ah ha? Hot and the people I mean they have
the roads closed off so you can't get too close.
But it is literally right outside the.

Speaker 1 (18:44):
Airport, the lava where the roads muddy. No, I need
you to say, yes, yes, that was called ash. What
is this stuff?

Speaker 3 (18:54):
The lava flow that then turned. I'm trying to think
of Dante's peak.

Speaker 2 (18:58):
I've never seen that. Oh you got to herd is
a great movie. So could you see ash in the streets? No,
it was a little bit farther off the street where
they the ash didn't get there, but you could see
lava shooting up. It was incredible.

Speaker 1 (19:10):
I know the exact scenes.

Speaker 3 (19:11):
Saw one in coach streak and not trying to steal
your thunder Oh you did, yes, so I know the
shooting up.

Speaker 2 (19:15):
It's pretty badass, pretty bad ass. Like I was like, oh,
this is so cool. So then we're like, well what
do we do. We go to try to check in
the hotel. Oh, sorry, your room's not ready. So it
is ten o'clock in the morning.

Speaker 1 (19:24):
Are their breathing issue.

Speaker 2 (19:26):
Been up all night?

Speaker 1 (19:27):
Have nothing to do because coffee.

Speaker 2 (19:29):
No, no, no, I haven't breathing this. You said there
was a breathing thing. They said, air quality is bad.
I rolled the windows up. I was like, I don't
want to get that in my lungs. And we drive
into town. We're like, all right, well, I guess we'll
just hang out, walk around the towny.

Speaker 1 (19:40):
It doesn't bad.

Speaker 2 (19:41):
He air quality is already bad, Guach, you can't get
any worse. She's like, what was that. Oh, that's the volcano, honey,
that's the volcano. The volcano out of my ass. So
we go and we hang out out in Rerekovic, which
I guess is the capital of the biggest city, and

(20:02):
it's really small. It's pretty cool little city. We'd go
and eat and finally the hotel's ready at night, like
at five o'clock at night. All right, cool, nothing exciting.
And then the next day we set out on our
journey and we drove all over the art. We drove
our ass out of that rental car.

Speaker 1 (20:17):
I mean.

Speaker 2 (20:17):
And here's the cool thing about Iceland. There are no police.
I didn't see I was there for four days. I
didn't see one police. It's awesome, de you could go
as fast as you wanted on those roads. Ray, we
were doing skag, heroin, and brown all at the same
time in the car. I don't even think they have
skag and heroin over there.

Speaker 1 (20:35):
Well do you know what they do have? They have alcohol?
They do not drinking and driving.

Speaker 3 (20:39):
You should have done in the passenger seat and had
your wife drive correct.

Speaker 2 (20:42):
But we drove and we checked out all these waterfalls,
did some hikes. It was beautiful. That's what our tea's
was the waterfall. So what did you guys do under
the waterfall? Uh? There was one. It was awesome, dude.
You can walk behind it and just feel it coming down.
You get soaked because the wind's blowing. And then there's
another one you hike about a half a mile and

(21:05):
you know all the pictures online show it's all beautiful.
You know what I mean, You're gonna have it to yourself.
There's a damn line to get like you have to
climb behind these rocks, like you have to go in
through this crevice. And then there's this beautiful like cave
and there's a waterfall in it, but there's it's not
very big to get in, so you have to wait
for people to come out. We stood in line for
like forty five minutes to get back to the waterfall.

(21:26):
Like online, it makes it look like you're just gonna
walk up and you're gonna be the only one there. Well,
we're standing in line, so damn long, I got a piss.

Speaker 1 (21:33):
Damn Starbucks waterfall.

Speaker 2 (21:35):
Hey, I got a piss.

Speaker 3 (21:36):
And I'm like, coach you, there's your perfect time to say, well,
I haven't seen a line this big since Pumpkin spice lattes.

Speaker 2 (21:43):
My fault. I didn't have the humor. Didn't have the humor, right,
so you guys bail on the line. No, She's like,
we're almost there, and I was like, can I just
be over there in the grass cause no, I'm like,
you get a pi. Well, she was, well, there's no police.
But I was like, I can't do I can't hold it.
I gotta go back to the to the start.

Speaker 3 (22:01):
I'm giving you a citizen's or RESPI if I see
you pissing next to a waterfall.

Speaker 2 (22:05):
She goes, it's too it's this is nature. You can't
do that. That's just bad. And I was like, okay,
just hold it, and I said I can't, Like I've
been holding it so I have to literally run I
half a mile back to the parking lot where the
pissers are. Wow, man, very adventurous. You're a good runner
in America. No, I'm about to shut myself.

Speaker 1 (22:27):
Oh this piss is this piss?

Speaker 2 (22:28):
And my wife's like, you are you have a problem.
There's something wrong with you. And we're only four people
from going in. But I was like, I can't wait.
I can't hold it. And I sprint in my hiking boots,
in my pants, in my raining parallels to my story,
and I am I am sprinting, sprinting, and I get
into the bathroom and I pee and I'm zipping up

(22:49):
the pants and she text, we're next, hurry up. So
here we go.

Speaker 1 (22:56):
I sprint out of that bathroom and I sprint my.

Speaker 2 (22:58):
Ass a half mile back, and I mean, I am
passing people and they're like, why the fuck is this
guy running back and forth on this path? Is everybody's
enjoying their leisurely walk and enjoying.

Speaker 1 (23:08):
The antics are fucking weird.

Speaker 2 (23:10):
They are so stupid. Do they not understand this? And
now they work out this is another accent, so I
can do it. I you were there for ten days
and you didn't learn now, I was only in Iceland
for four days, okay?

Speaker 1 (23:22):
Uh?

Speaker 2 (23:23):
And so I got back, she goes, I had to
let two people cut, and she told the two girls
in front of us. They waited forty five minutes they
had to pee two one of them peed in the
other's mouth. No, they got to the front and they're like,
we don't have time to go in. Just take our picture,
and so my wife just took a picture through with
them and through the rocks you could see the waterfall.
They had a fairy to catch. It's all blurry and no,

(23:44):
she said, you could barely see, you know, through the
crack you could just barely see the waterfall and the girl.
And they waited in line for forty five minutes. I'm like,
if I had to catch a fairy out of tell
the people for me, Hey, do you mind if I go?

Speaker 1 (23:53):
Your wife had it on selfie motives.

Speaker 2 (23:54):
And so we go in beautiful waterfall, amazing, great, nothing
really the rest of the trip. We go and we
eat at this one soup place one night, and then
next door they say lava show, forty five minute lava show,
and I'm like, what they're like, actual lava from a volcano.

(24:16):
Come see it. And I'm like, honey, we gotta do it.

Speaker 1 (24:19):
Yeah, that's pretty cool. We gotta do it.

Speaker 2 (24:22):
False advertising, man, And.

Speaker 1 (24:24):
You don't get that in Vegas anymore.

Speaker 2 (24:25):
Of the mirage clothes, which one had the volcano mirage
they're about to knock it down in a month. They're
not gonna knock it down. They're gonna remodel it and
make it the hard rock forgot Dropicicana. They're knocking, they're
knocking down. They're a stadium is going there?

Speaker 1 (24:36):
Sorry, go.

Speaker 2 (24:37):
So we go to this lava show, forty five minute
lava show, and I'm.

Speaker 1 (24:41):
Like, hell yeah, hell yeah.

Speaker 2 (24:44):
And we just happened to see it because it was
in the same parking lot as where we're eating at
the soup kitchen or whatever.

Speaker 3 (24:49):
At the soup kitchen, I mean, it sounds like such
a party. What are you guys doing? Like pregame drink
so what?

Speaker 2 (24:55):
I had some beers and had some soup.

Speaker 1 (24:58):
What lo of the soup kitchen and sign and entice
you guys have?

Speaker 2 (25:02):
My wife was doing research and someone on Reddit said,
nine months later, I'm still thinking about the soup I had.
What a fucking And I'm like, oh man, this must
be amazing freaking soup.

Speaker 1 (25:17):
I'll do crab.

Speaker 2 (25:18):
But my wife is a she loves soup. Ben loves it.
Lobster bisk ah. Now they had uh lamb soup. They
had they eat a lot of lamb there because they
have lamb. They have more lambs sheep than they do
humans in Iceland.

Speaker 1 (25:32):
Where's my flock? I tied it up here hopefully parking.

Speaker 2 (25:35):
That's kind of like what they sell me, but that's
Canadian a little bit. Uh So we go to the
Lava Show and I'm like all right, and the soup
was okay, but it wasn't amazing. And I had three
different kinds, don't I had the corn and spinach, I
had the the fish curry one and some other one.
And then we go to the Lava show and it's
a in a room and they give you protective glasses,

(25:57):
you know what I mean, because it's gonna get so
freaking hot.

Speaker 1 (26:00):
We took off our clothes.

Speaker 2 (26:01):
So I'm like, forty five minutes of lava here we go.

Speaker 1 (26:03):
All right.

Speaker 2 (26:04):
The lady closes the door, comes in, she starts talking,
Oh my name is Rock, and I'm like, well, this
is about to be awesome.

Speaker 1 (26:11):
Nice to meet you. I'm Lunchbox.

Speaker 2 (26:13):
She's like, welcome to the Lava Show, the only place
in the world where you can see real lava from
a volcano up close. And I'm she goes, it's gonna
get so hot. Tho, you're gonna need those goggles to
protect your eyes that and I'm like, hell yeah.

Speaker 1 (26:27):
Honey, take off your bra.

Speaker 2 (26:28):
So then she proceeded to stand up there for fifteen
minutes and give us a history of the town and
the volcanoes that have erupted in that town.

Speaker 1 (26:36):
What the cleef?

Speaker 2 (26:37):
And I'm like, okay, that's fifteen minutes of my forty five.
When are we gonna get to the damn lava?

Speaker 1 (26:42):
Not bad, you still have thirty minutes of lava.

Speaker 2 (26:44):
Then we have thirty minutes of lava.

Speaker 1 (26:45):
She's like, honey, get ready to feel the l rumble
of the lava.

Speaker 2 (26:49):
And she goes, Now, so before we get to the lava,
let me show you a video.

Speaker 1 (26:54):
No, I'm not.

Speaker 3 (26:55):
Doing the tours with the damn video. Show me three
d bitch. Sorry, I'll delete that.

Speaker 2 (27:00):
And I'm like, okay, so now we're gonna watch a video.
So what was the video? Ray? It was a fifteen
minute video.

Speaker 1 (27:06):
We're at thirty minutes now.

Speaker 2 (27:08):
It was a fifteen minute video showing exactly what she
just talked about.

Speaker 1 (27:13):
That's bulged.

Speaker 2 (27:15):
So she talked about the history of the town. Then
they made a little cartoon video for you to enjoy
of what she just told you about.

Speaker 1 (27:21):
Nice learning about your town.

Speaker 2 (27:23):
Like either way, just either play, show us the lava.
Where's the food? I wanted to get hot in here,
hotting you sheeper, boring maw. But I did learn if
the volcano is going to erupt all the tourists you
meet at the church on top of the hill, that's
the evacuation.

Speaker 1 (27:41):
Plan, all right, So where's the lava show?

Speaker 2 (27:42):
Exactly where is the lava show? Raight?

Speaker 1 (27:44):
Oh? That was it?

Speaker 2 (27:46):
Fifteen minute video?

Speaker 1 (27:47):
All right?

Speaker 2 (27:48):
She goes, all right, now should we get to the lava,
and so she does. It comes rolling out of this
like tube in the wall, and there's lava and she
starts picking it up with this stick. Hour talking and
she's making little things, and then it freezes and she's
cracking it and she's picking it up.

Speaker 1 (28:06):
The lava's touching me.

Speaker 2 (28:08):
Then she brings out a big old ice thing piece
of ice and puts it in the lava and makes
it blow up like a big balloon.

Speaker 1 (28:14):
A science project.

Speaker 2 (28:15):
Exactly what it was, baking soda and food colery. Dude, No,
it was real lava.

Speaker 1 (28:21):
Saw this in second grade.

Speaker 2 (28:22):
It was real lava and she.

Speaker 1 (28:26):
Got your ass. Did you feel the hot?

Speaker 2 (28:28):
Oh? I could feel the heat, man.

Speaker 1 (28:30):
So they must have just pumped the obviously the heater on.

Speaker 2 (28:32):
No, no, they have the They have to warm up.
So what they do is they go get.

Speaker 1 (28:35):
The right and they actually turned the heater like one
hundred and ten. They pretty much fucked us.

Speaker 2 (28:38):
No. No, they go get the rocks, like the ash
from like the actual volcanoes in the mountains, and they
bring it in and they reheat it up and make
it into lava.

Speaker 1 (28:48):
That's making it better. Awesome. Okay, she played with the
lava for ten minutes, then the show is over. See
you need it a little bit more of that.

Speaker 2 (28:55):
Oh you think it is advertised as a forty five
minute lava sh show.

Speaker 1 (29:00):
Was it ever lovvying or No? It was lava.

Speaker 2 (29:02):
No, No, its lava. It came out like lava like
it does out of a volcano.

Speaker 1 (29:06):
Okay, that's pretty cool. I shouldn't knocked it.

Speaker 2 (29:07):
It was pretty badass for ten minutes, but advertise it
as ten minutes and then I get out. I don't
need to watch the damn video.

Speaker 1 (29:13):
But she had the lava like she's like having a
rub on her.

Speaker 2 (29:16):
No, no, she had a metal pool because it was
so hot.

Speaker 1 (29:18):
She all right, she was fully naked. It was actually
a lava tit show.

Speaker 2 (29:21):
No no, And I'm like, wow, this is amazing, dude, amazing.
And we then we're leaving. We got to drive to
the hotel. We still got an hour to drive to
the hotel. And we get to the hotel and I

(29:41):
guess what. They're already closed. You can't check in.

Speaker 1 (29:44):
Wait, it's here's a hotel.

Speaker 2 (29:45):
Oh yeah yeah, but in Iceland nothing. It was only
ten o'clock, but they only stay on duty till eight.
That's my biggest fear of other countries. You never know
when places closed. And I'm like, uh, and everything, the
lights are off, everything, and we're like, how the hell
do we get in our room? How do we do this?
We we already paid online? What do we do?

Speaker 1 (30:04):
Sleep under the volcano?

Speaker 2 (30:05):
It's warm, so we bust out our flashlights and we're
looking under Matt we're looking. I mean we're looking the place.
I know. That's what I was worried about. Well, no, shit,
like I'm going around the back, like maybe there's a
hidden door or something.

Speaker 1 (30:20):
You Americans in your crime rates freeze.

Speaker 2 (30:23):
And then no, they don't have police. Man, I don't
think they have guns. I don't think they have anything
over Iceland. It was it was like, there's no one there.
It is empty. And so then I, oh, wait, wait,
what's that sign over there. It's on one of the
windows that says, oh, sorry, we're not here to greet you,
but we close at eight pm. Just so you know
your cabin five d your key is in the door.

Speaker 1 (30:47):
Excuse me? Anybody a polar bear sleeping in there right now? Dude?

Speaker 2 (30:51):
So you just go up and the key is in
the door. Quite the security says, no, that's how nice
it is in Iceland. They don't have any crime. They
got nothing on now, they have no problem. They just
left the key in the door for us.

Speaker 1 (31:03):
What do you mean you were robbed? I don't know.
The door was open.

Speaker 2 (31:07):
It was awesome. I was like, how cool is this Americans?

Speaker 1 (31:11):
Of course we tried to break in a back door.

Speaker 2 (31:12):
Oh we're trying to break in a back door and
they're like, hey, just go to your cabin man. We
left the key in the door. And you look and
there was other cabins that just had the key in
the door. So there was other families that hadn't arrived yet.

Speaker 1 (31:22):
Honey, I'm gonna go sleep in five A if you
don't mind.

Speaker 2 (31:28):
All right, we'll take a break and we'll finish up
my vacation right after this. So the next day, right
and here's the crazy bar. You're driving and they only
have like one road every the main road is road.
If you turn off onto a side road, it's a
gravel road, feeder roads. It's all gravel, there's rocks, there's everything.

(31:50):
Like you most people have big old like four wheel
drive if you want to go anywhere. And we went
and we swam through their public swimming pools.

Speaker 1 (31:59):
Dude.

Speaker 2 (32:00):
It was just in the side of the mountain.

Speaker 1 (32:01):
Dude.

Speaker 2 (32:02):
It was the coolest damn thing I've ever seen.

Speaker 1 (32:03):
Play under the bridge.

Speaker 2 (32:05):
Like you had to drive like a mile down this
rocky road you park, you have to hike a mile
to get to the public swimming pool.

Speaker 3 (32:15):
And there they're just you guys in Iceland. Ah, there's
a few public It's like you guys in the volcano.
There's like three hundred and fifty thousand people that live
in all of Iceland. But the kids didn't know how
to swim because you can't swim in the water because
it's so damn cold. So they used the geological geo
whatever thermal water that comes off the mountain and they

(32:35):
built a damn swimming pool coach. So the freaking did
they charge you? Now they make money off of a
pool in a mountain.

Speaker 2 (32:43):
Culture, there is no money. The water is green, there's
algae that grow. Culture.

Speaker 1 (32:48):
What do they make tourism money?

Speaker 2 (32:50):
No? Culture, This ain't a tourist spot.

Speaker 1 (32:53):
So why'd you go, dude? Because it was so ray
It was us and two sheeps bathing in this bath.

Speaker 2 (33:02):
No, no, it was It was so cool because you
hike a mile to the swimming pool and then they
have this little shack where you can change into your
swimming suit and you just have the water's warm because
it's running off the mountain, the geothermal mountain, so you
have a warm swimming pool. The bottom of the water
is like algae. It's the water.

Speaker 1 (33:25):
No weird way to explain it, but it sounds good.
It was beautiful. Dude.

Speaker 2 (33:30):
I'm in a swimming pool just out in the middle
of nowhere, and look at this coacher. Look at the background.
That's the public swimming pool. Was it topless, well, I'm topless? What?
Oh no, she wasn't topless. But one of the walls

(33:50):
is just the side of the mountain. It was incredible.
And then we drove out to a lagoon and we
had these massive and I mean massive glaciers that have
fallen off, and I guess there are icebergs that have
fallen off the glaciers and they're just sitting there in
the water.

Speaker 1 (34:07):
Okay, I mean it looks like do youp a Michian
But yeah.

Speaker 2 (34:10):
But they fall off and then there's this little like
a inlet or whatever you call it, like a channel,
and it goes out to the main water, and then
the waves push it back and they get thrown up
on the beach. So you have big, old, freaking icebergs
on the beach. No, they don't have icebergs like this.

Speaker 1 (34:30):
Yeah they do. They have an ice show every time. Bro.

Speaker 2 (34:34):
It was incredible. I'm talking.

Speaker 1 (34:36):
No, that's beautiful.

Speaker 2 (34:37):
It's called Diamond Beach, but it wasn't sunny, so it
didn't look like little diamonds when we were there. It
was just big old chunks of ice. Thought that was fantastic,
so fun.

Speaker 3 (34:45):
And so far you've showed me two pictures. It's there's
no people. I love this country. Nobody exists, dude.

Speaker 2 (34:52):
It was great. It's uninhabited and you had all this
fish everywhere, fresh fish for saying, oh, buy this fish,
we cook it right here.

Speaker 1 (34:59):
For would you cook it?

Speaker 2 (35:01):
No? They cooked it.

Speaker 1 (35:01):
Honey. Do you want a raw fish to eat? No? No, no,
no no, I ate fish because it was all that.
That's all.

Speaker 2 (35:08):
Take a raw trout, fish, suit, fried fish, fish and chip.
I mean it was delicious, so good.

Speaker 1 (35:13):
Because it was fresh from the table.

Speaker 2 (35:15):
And you drive on this main road, dude, and then
when you come to a bridge, it's a one lane bridge.
You have to wait for the car and those that
had to come across.

Speaker 1 (35:20):
I've seen that before Costa Rica. Awesome. Not to steal
your thunder.

Speaker 2 (35:23):
Not to steal my thunder. So then we're heading out
and we've been there four days and we're like, and
my sister in law was like, you don't need more
than four days. It's enough.

Speaker 1 (35:32):
Four days.

Speaker 2 (35:32):
You guys are just mountain pool hopping. Oh, mountain hopping, driving,
suit soup, kitchen hopping. Here's the one problem. It was
too much driving. It was a lot of damn drive.
You think a lot of driving.

Speaker 1 (35:43):
You lost me at twenty minutes to the hotel.

Speaker 2 (35:45):
Well, because you would drive like an hour and a
half hike up a waterfall, whatever, and then you'd have
to get in the car and drive another hour to
something else. That was the only problem because we didn't
do it, even big hikes, like we didn't do like
a twelve mile hike or anything like that new like
legit hikes. But we did see a geyser. You know what,
the guyser saw a yellowstone. Not to steal your erd.

(36:07):
I never even knew they were real. Yeah, they shoot
right up in the air man every three minutes, boo
shoots up freaking water like guyser.

Speaker 1 (36:16):
Dude, it's a geezer.

Speaker 2 (36:19):
Hey, and dumb mass people they were sitting up wind,
so he would shoot up and the water all soak
their asses. I was laughing, they're sitting there. Oh and
then people, here's the stupidest thing people did at the geysers. Okay,
so damn stupid. You drive or fly or travel all
over from wherever you're at to freaking Iceland to see

(36:40):
this geyser. And you know what they do. They turn
their back to the geyser and film them with the
guys are in the background.

Speaker 1 (36:48):
Yeah, average person would rather see themselves than nature.

Speaker 2 (36:51):
And I'm like, guys, the video of you with your
back to the geyser. You traveled all this damn way,
wouldn't you rather see the fucking geyser with your eyes
instead of your back? Just see a video of the
guys are exploding behind.

Speaker 1 (37:03):
You, you never seeing you porn squirt it all over.

Speaker 2 (37:06):
I was like, how stupid are you? And they would
just sit there and sit there and sit there, and
because there's not a timer, there's not a timer, it's
just like it doesn't randomly three minutes, six minutes.

Speaker 1 (37:16):
It's probably some of our sore losers nation.

Speaker 2 (37:21):
So I thought I was funny. So when we show
up to the guyser, because it says it, you know,
explodes every six minutes, every ten minutes, whatever, I just
start going ten.

Speaker 1 (37:31):
Nine, Hey, dude, I bet people were actually thinking.

Speaker 2 (37:36):
Hey. People start pulling out their cameras and I'd be like, one,
you were doing the college shot clock for the visiting team,
and nothing would happened. And so I just start over ten.

Speaker 1 (37:49):
Nine eight seven. Your wife's like.

Speaker 2 (37:53):
My, I'm gonna stop it, stop it. People are gonna
get mad. I'm like, all right, I'd get to zero
and I'll be like, all right, now it's for real,
ten nine a. And eventually I'm right because I would
do it for three minutes, right, and people, I mean,
it was so to me, it was hilarious. To my
wife not so funny.

Speaker 1 (38:11):
And the guys are it's just shooting the steam.

Speaker 2 (38:13):
Yeah, shooting the hot ass water the geold thermal heated
water whatever up in the air.

Speaker 3 (38:19):
Which I guess at some point is from the volcano. Yes,
it's all connected. All so the pool you were in
is the same thing connected to the guysers, connected to
the volcano you were bathing in, geo thermal tectonic plates.

Speaker 2 (38:32):
Yeah, we went to the tectonic plates because and it
wasn't very impressive. It was just two rocks and I
didn't really understand it.

Speaker 3 (38:37):
Yeah, the same thing with four corners. It's a spot
in the ground where they drew an X and they
said you're if you step right here, you're in four
states at the same time.

Speaker 1 (38:45):
Cool. If I step over there, I'm in a bar.
What gives?

Speaker 2 (38:48):
Like?

Speaker 1 (38:49):
Who cares?

Speaker 2 (38:50):
So that was that, I mean, it was cool. So
then we're like, you know, we have three extra days.
You know what I'm saying, Like, what should we do?
You know what we did. Let's go to Let's go
to Let's go to Dublin. It's only an hour and
forty minute flight from Iceland, okay, And so the flight
out six am. So we're up because we're an hour

(39:12):
from the airport. We're up at two o'clock in the
morning to go to freaking Ireland.

Speaker 3 (39:18):
A couple in the Dominican Republic a couple of years
back got up at one am to catch their flight,
didn't see a blind curve, went over the cliff, and died.
Not saying that's anywhere related to a you, but traveling
early in the morning in a rental car reminds me
of that.

Speaker 1 (39:31):
Continue Oh dude.

Speaker 3 (39:34):
Honey, watch out over there. I mean, dude, you said
it was one road.

Speaker 2 (39:38):
Yeah, but no, no, but we were in a bigger city, Recovic,
so it had like a real road.

Speaker 1 (39:43):
That's terrifyingly similar.

Speaker 2 (39:45):
Yeah, So I was like, this sucks man up at
two we're leaving in the hotel when we told them
we were checking out that earlier, Like, oh, we have
breakfast bags if you want to come get muffin and whatever,
so a snack for the road. So I go down, Hey, man,
I'm gonna get the breakfast bag, and goes what breakfast bag.
I'm like, the guy last night said that, like, you
guys have breakfast bags here, like for people leaving checking

(40:06):
out early, like a muffet in an orange or something.
He goes, Um, I don't know, maybe you have to
pre order that or something. I'm like, okay, so I have.

Speaker 1 (40:15):
No food McDonald's appy.

Speaker 2 (40:17):
I got an hour drive to the airport. It's two
fifteen in the morning. Fine, all eat is sheep. And
so we get on the road and we're driving and
we're getting closer to the airport. It's pitch black outside
ray and I saw the most beautiful thing I've ever
seen in my.

Speaker 1 (40:33):
Life, freaking prostitute.

Speaker 2 (40:35):
The volcano erupting in pitch black. Closer you could see
two spouts of lava just shooting in the air with
the background of the black and then the red glow,
orange slash of the lava and we had the road
to ourself. It was awesome.

Speaker 3 (40:57):
How far do you think you were You may have
already said it probably a mile.

Speaker 1 (41:02):
That is insanely close.

Speaker 3 (41:05):
I think I was five four five miles where we
had to use kind of binoculars to see the volcano.

Speaker 1 (41:12):
Dude. It was like, could you see it erupt without binoculars?

Speaker 2 (41:15):
Yes?

Speaker 1 (41:16):
Oh, too close for comfort?

Speaker 2 (41:18):
But continue no, Like, I thought it was cool when
we got to Iceland and we were driving and I
saw it during the day and I saw a little
bit and I saw some smoke. I was like, Wow,
that's so cool. Seeing it in the middle of the
night when you have to pitch it black and the
lava is shooting, I was like, this is the coolest
damn thing I've ever seen. It was so beautiful, so amazing.

Speaker 1 (41:43):
Better than fireworks.

Speaker 2 (41:45):
Yeah, fireworks, huh. Every time I see a firework now
and be like, huh, that's no volcano, dude.

Speaker 3 (41:50):
Why doesn't Nashville instead of Fourth of July or New
Year's Eve do a volcano?

Speaker 2 (41:54):
Oh dude, build a replica volcano. Be fantastic.

Speaker 1 (42:00):
There's no city adopt this, I don't know. I don't know.
It's making light of a natural disaster.

Speaker 2 (42:06):
Yeah, And then I never said anything to my kids
about us seeing a volcano because the middle kid, baby
Box two, for some reason, he had a nightmare or
something about volcanoes, like a couple months back, and he
talks about it all the time, about being scared of volcano.
So I could not mention volcano. And when we told
the laws, I was like, whatever you guys do, do
not mention there's an active volcano. And like we were

(42:27):
hiking on volcanoes, like those mountains are volcanoes that could
erupt any time, And I was like, do not mention volcanoes.

Speaker 1 (42:36):
I just tried to look up a volcano dessert filibuster.

Speaker 2 (42:39):
And I mean it was great.

Speaker 1 (42:41):
So then, right, I mean, my vacation is taken too long. No,
you're fine, I'll do mine next time.

Speaker 2 (42:46):
No, No, we're gonna stay here longer.

Speaker 1 (42:49):
No we're not. I got shit to do. Okay, there's
no volcano desserts. Stupid ass Google.

Speaker 2 (42:56):
Then we had to Dublin my homeland where my grandpa's from,
the Irish Home of the Irish.

Speaker 3 (43:02):
Don't don't, don't mention Chili's guy, don't mention the volcano
lava rock cake?

Speaker 1 (43:07):
Hey, would you guys like the volcano Rocke?

Speaker 2 (43:09):
Oh God, dang it, my son's gonna have nightmares again.
We'll be right back. We hit Ireland.

Speaker 1 (43:20):
Dublin is a fantastic place.

Speaker 3 (43:24):
Now the story starts. Let I quit listening to the
last one.

Speaker 2 (43:27):
Let me tell you about Doublin. We landed Dublin at
eight am, because guess what I mean, we travel overnight
up at two am. It was an exhausting day. But
I'm telling you what. The energy in Dublin. America needs
adopt new rules because Dublin is just a big ass
party that people are amazing and the Irish fellas.

Speaker 1 (43:48):
They are great. Why did you get hansy? Dude? We
started right in the cab, dude, Hey, you ever got
a huged by a man before? No.

Speaker 2 (43:59):
We get in the cab from the airport to our
hotel and our cab driver just starts talking about soccer,
about how you oh, I used to play football, football,
I played for football and you know when I was
sixteen I went over to England to play for Leicester
City and then he had another.

Speaker 1 (44:16):
Exactly what language are they speaking there.

Speaker 2 (44:19):
English but with an Irish accent. I mean, fantastic hard
to understand him. They talk a million miles a minute,
so fast, just boom, boom, boom. And he said when
he went it was at the time that the Irish
were still bombing England and so it was very hard
on him as a sixteen year old because anybody would
find out he was Irish, they would just harass, harass, harassment.

Speaker 1 (44:39):
So after two years, okay, buddy.

Speaker 2 (44:41):
He called his dad and he's like, Dad, I got
to come home. I can't take it. Other people had
it worse, and his dad was like, no, no, no,
you have a chance to play in the Premier League.
You need to stay.

Speaker 1 (44:49):
I had trouble in the private school as a lot
of the kids were more richer than me. Come on, buddy.

Speaker 2 (44:54):
And so at the age of eighteen he left England
and gave up his dream of playing in the Premier
League because of the harassment. And he's just telling me
all sorts of stories about go to this pub, go
to that pub, don't go to that pub. That's a
stupid tourist pub. Blah blah blah. You'll pay eight dollars
for a pint of guinness. I mean, guinness is just flowing. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (45:12):
See, that's not my favorite beer.

Speaker 2 (45:13):
It's it's it's terrible. But did they have Ultra. I
don't know if they had Ultra, but they had cores Light,
they had some other ones. Yeah, but there's so much
guinness being bought. Hey, they had the beer that we
don't mention here in the States, bud.

Speaker 4 (45:29):
Ah.

Speaker 2 (45:30):
I didn't see any bud light. But dude, it was
so busy in the afternoon. The dudes would just sit
leave the tap on just pouring guinnesses and they would
just have them stacked up on the bar because so
many people would come in and order guinness and so
they could just hand they couldn't keep up. Uh yeah,
would you mind cleaning your hands before you stick your
hands and my beer and give me some, dude, And

(45:51):
then everybody when when the work day is over, like
around four o'clock, all of a sudden, the pubs are
just pass. It is like a freaking soap. It's just
like the movies, dude, and they don't care. You can
come out on the street and have your beer and
stand like you go in the bar and you order there.
You know, a pint of guinness and then there's no chairs.
Just go outside. It doesn't matter you stand on the sidewalk,

(46:12):
sit on the street. I mean, it's just people flowing
out onto the streets, hanging out, talking, chatting. They pull
up stools, they.

Speaker 1 (46:21):
Got chairs, touching. Dude.

Speaker 2 (46:23):
There's no people saying, oh wait, wait, no alcohol past
this point. Oh no, you can't take our glass outside.
It was so relaxed and so fun. Everybody in a
good mood. The only problem is Ray I was an American.
They discriminated is I didn't vape or smoke. Ninety five
percent of the people there smoke or vape. I had none.

(46:45):
They looked at me like, you don't vape, you don't smoke.

Speaker 1 (46:47):
No man, What about your wife? Now, she doesn't smoke
or vape either. I thought I saw her vapin at
that convention.

Speaker 2 (46:52):
Ah no, she wasn't vaping, dude. Okay, no, no, she
definitely doesn't vape.

Speaker 3 (46:55):
So did she have fun as a woman because it
does sound like a men mentality to me. It's just
like belly up to the bars, sonny. And then they
just throw the beer. I'll be like, Hi, can I
get a can? I'd prefer to I have.

Speaker 1 (47:05):
You slap my beer across the bar like a fucking barbarian.

Speaker 2 (47:09):
No, I mean she had a great time.

Speaker 3 (47:11):
Like when they're handing you, the beers are like dumping
beer all over you.

Speaker 2 (47:15):
No, no, no, no no, they just have them. Like they
have so many people ordering guinness. They would just line
up fifteen on the bar at a time because people
walk up two guinnesses and they just hand him to him,
hand them to him, hand them to him.

Speaker 1 (47:25):
And one guy's we gotta get him the alcohol fast.

Speaker 2 (47:28):
And one guy's job is just to sit there and
fill cups full of guinness. Dude, he's just filling up
glasses a Guinness. But someday you can serve this product.
Until then, Sonny, you're the pumper. And I mean the
bartenders are talking shit to each other.

Speaker 1 (47:41):
Hey fuck you man. Really he's like, I bang your
guy last night. What what'd you say, dude.

Speaker 2 (47:47):
I mean they're sitting there and like, you fuck. Guy's
just trying to get you to move out the way. God,
you know what I mean.

Speaker 1 (47:53):
They're just like, yeah, use your manners.

Speaker 2 (47:55):
Thanks, And then we're talking to one bartender right and
he's like, oh.

Speaker 1 (48:00):
You guys are from America. I couldn't tell.

Speaker 2 (48:02):
Lads you didn't come for the American football game last weekend.
He goes, oh, he goes lots of Florida State three
three to one Florida State fans to that other team.
But what a huge, like crazy thing is that the
other team won. They weren't supposed to. And I was like, yeah,
that's crazy. I was like, you guys, don't watch football here.
He goes, no, because you got to it's six hours different.
So if it's noon here, it's six pm in Ireland.

Speaker 1 (48:24):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (48:24):
So we we dealt with that for the Olympics, but
you could still bet it continue.

Speaker 2 (48:28):
They didn't. They don't watch a lot of football, but
the super Bowl. They do open the pubs at three
am to watch the Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 (48:35):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (48:35):
And because here, if you want to watch Premier League,
did you tell him we have to watch it at
six am?

Speaker 1 (48:39):
We have the same problem.

Speaker 2 (48:40):
And that's what he told me. He goes over there.
If you live in Ireland, and this is what he
told me, the bartender, you either like Manchester United or
you like Liverpool And they were playing on Sunday and
I would have left. We were like, oh my god.
We got to get to a pub for this we're
we're gonna go watch it. And he told me. I said,
so you're you know like I said.

Speaker 1 (49:01):
He goes like, did you get his number? No?

Speaker 2 (49:03):
So this guy was talking to him. I was like, so,
you know, is your what are you? Are you a
man you fan? He goes, yeah, I'm a man you fan.
I said, oh, so your dad was a man you fan.
He goes and he's like, actually, he goes. He goes,
that's actually a funny story. He goes, my dad, he's
a leads fan. All the guys his age are Leads fans.
They have they've been kind of pissed poor for a while,
but they used to be really good. And he goes,

(49:24):
at nine years old, I decided I wanted to be different.
I didn't want to want like leads anymore.

Speaker 1 (49:28):
Well, in our country they do something different than that different.

Speaker 2 (49:31):
And he goes, I went to my dad at nine
years old and I said, Dad. He goes, Dad, I
don't want to cheer for leads anymore. And he goes,
what the bloody hell did you say? You don't want
to cheer for leads? Who are you gonna cheer for?
And he goes, Dad, I'm a cheer for man United.
Are you fucking kidding me?

Speaker 1 (49:52):
Son?

Speaker 2 (49:54):
Those are guys are pieces of shit, pieces a ship.
And you will never watch that on my Telly ever.
You will never watch those bachelards on my Telly. And
I will never take you to a game at Manchester
United never. And he goes, and my dad would sit
there and spit it our own TV. I'm my dad,
you're spitting on our own Telly. In America, we break

(50:15):
them and he's like, yeah, because they're goddamn bloody assholes.
They're bloody assholes. He goes, but don't worry. My uncles
took me to man New games. I mean I was
just like just like he was like, it goes crazy,
and I was like, okay, okay, so yeah for the
Titans games, we don't even go. It's crazy in the States.
Then he tells me, he goes, yeah, and last year

(50:36):
he goes that Notre Dame team came Notre Dame and
he goes, and we turn on the telly and they
got a lepre con running up and down the sideline.

Speaker 1 (50:44):
It's blasphemy, buddy, And he goes.

Speaker 2 (50:46):
He goes, these guys are pissing us. These guys are
pissing us. They brought a leprecn with them because they
came to Ireland. He goes. We were going, what the
bloody hell these guys pissing us? And I'm like, and
he goes, I'm not pissing you, buddy, He goes, it wasn't.
Ntil Later, when I was talking to one of the customers,

(51:07):
he told me that no, no, no, that's our mascot.

Speaker 1 (51:09):
We take him.

Speaker 2 (51:09):
Everywhere, and he I go, oh shit, wait, thought you
were giving pissing us? Wait, thought you guys were pissing
us because you were in Ireland.

Speaker 1 (51:16):
Well, I gotta go take a piss. Are you pissing us?

Speaker 2 (51:19):
No? In America, it means I gotta drain my lizard,
pull out my hanker.

Speaker 1 (51:24):
Are you pissing us, bunny, bloody pissing us? No, I'm
just gonna use your pisser.

Speaker 2 (51:29):
And then we went on that Sunday, we went to
the pub and watched Liverpool. Man, you freaking pat people
chanting and yelling and screaming. Do next to me at
the bar reading the newspaper, betting no reading the newspaper.

Speaker 1 (51:44):
I thought it was crazy.

Speaker 2 (51:45):
Well it was all types, dude. He was a local,
old dude, just reading the newspaper, send to the bar,
having a pint. I mean, it's great. It was a
fantastic time. Sounds like all dudes now. There's chicks everywhere, really,
and I never see so many chicks order wine at
a bar. The dudes are in it ordering pints a
guinness and the girls were ordering a glass of wine.

Speaker 3 (52:06):
Totally off topic. We have American taste. Did you find
the women there attractive?

Speaker 2 (52:11):
I didn't see one hot chicken Iceland. I did not
see one hot chicken Iceland. I don't know how they date.
I don't know how they do anything.

Speaker 1 (52:18):
I ol they find a sheep.

Speaker 2 (52:20):
And in Ireland, not very many hot chicks.

Speaker 1 (52:23):
No.

Speaker 2 (52:25):
No, if I saw hot chicken, she was probably a
visitor to Ireland. Okay, and that was my that was
my vacation.

Speaker 1 (52:32):
Dude. Did any dudes try to holler at your chick?

Speaker 2 (52:34):
No, everybody was so nice, so friendly.

Speaker 1 (52:37):
She went to their house and they let her just chill.

Speaker 2 (52:40):
Everybody was so effing friendly.

Speaker 1 (52:42):
So you're saying we're mean here.

Speaker 2 (52:44):
No, it was just the atmosphere, the energy in Dublin.
I freaking absolutely loved it absolutely loved it.

Speaker 3 (52:50):
Well, thank you for bringing it back, hey, because we
felt it in that podcast.

Speaker 1 (52:54):
That was for you, Paul. Do you feel that energy,
you bitch.

Speaker 2 (52:57):
We'll take a break and we're going down to mix
skill right back.

Speaker 1 (53:07):
Lunch.

Speaker 3 (53:08):
I wasn't gonna tell my story about almost shitting myself,
but I've got a jump to getting lost in Mexico.

Speaker 1 (53:15):
I need to hear about you almost shitting yourself.

Speaker 3 (53:18):
Night one, dinner one, where'd you go? Beer ten? We
were in Kankun. Baser wanted to go there. She pitched
it as it was a family place. They went back
in the day. I was down for that's cool.

Speaker 1 (53:28):
It's great.

Speaker 3 (53:29):
Beach wasn't as pretty as we preferred, but it was fine.
Food was good, people were awesome. They spoke the language
of Spanish, which I also do, very terribly big dumb American.
Night one, dude had the meal and I.

Speaker 2 (53:40):
Were You're worried about cartel at all?

Speaker 3 (53:42):
Now a resort Bezil doesn't leave the resort. God, except
for the time we got lost, so I had to
take a shit.

Speaker 1 (53:48):
Dude.

Speaker 3 (53:48):
We had a dinner. We had Italian in Mexico doesn't
make sense. It was fine. It was good, and I
told Basil, I have to leave you at dinner after
the bathroom. The guy spoke Spanish, so he thought I
was leaving my wife at dinner like we broke up.
He didn't understand that I had was a exploding inside.
It was night one, so I tell Baser, I have
to leave you here. Well, dude, I don't know where
the room is. It's at this resort houses. They throw

(54:11):
Luke Bryant's ply Deel Carmen.

Speaker 1 (54:13):
There or crash my deck or whatever they call it.
So it's huge. It is a massive resort.

Speaker 3 (54:18):
And I've never been to the room before but once,
and I had five micelobes on the way there.

Speaker 1 (54:22):
And guess what I was feeling, the modellos.

Speaker 2 (54:24):
Hitting you that you're an NBA champion yet are you
still any times? Hitting me as those modellos?

Speaker 3 (54:31):
So and then I'm trying to find the room. And
when I tell you, I was doing the duck walk,
I was doing the penguin walk, I was doing the
turtle walk, I was doing the Ostrich walk, the giraffe walk.

Speaker 2 (54:43):
I walked every possible way you could, but the way
that a man would walk.

Speaker 1 (54:47):
Dude.

Speaker 2 (54:47):
At one point I had my hand in my pants,
plugging my ass I have. I searched for the room
from ten for ten to fifteen minutes, just completely lost
in the dark, asking everybody speaks Spanish there, dude, in
the maids they're Spanish.

Speaker 3 (55:04):
Is very difficult to understand. They speak no English whatsoever.
So I'm going, there's our room number? What I can
give it now because we don't live there. Nineteen sixteen,
so there were nineteen buildings and each building had hundreds
of rooms. So I mean, dude, the place was massive,
and it was ten fifteen minutes, twenty minutes, twenty five minutes.

(55:25):
Basers text me, hey, where are you? I'd love to
go to this show tonight, or I'd love to go
to the lobby bar and get a drink. And I
still had Wi Fi was banging, so we were able
to text. Couldn't call those very weird. I could call
people in America, couldn't call Baser because we were both
in Mexico.

Speaker 1 (55:38):
Twenty five minutes, thirty minutes. Dude.

Speaker 3 (55:41):
At this point, I was plugging my own asshole so
I didn't shit myself. And when it got to thirty
five minutes, and I tell you.

Speaker 2 (55:49):
You couldn't find the lobby. I don't do that. I
had to go to my room. That's a great question,
but I'm weird. Wait, he lobby has a bathroom.

Speaker 3 (56:00):
Right, but I wanted to be in the comfort of
my own place. And also I had butt wives, which
is what I gotta do.

Speaker 2 (56:05):
You can't. You don't use toilet paper. So you brought
your own butt wives with you?

Speaker 1 (56:09):
Yes, past customs?

Speaker 2 (56:11):
Hold on, hold on? What kind of butt wives do
you use? There's all kinds.

Speaker 1 (56:15):
There's dudes.

Speaker 3 (56:16):
They promote that on Pat McFee dot So thirty five
minutes at forty minutes, guys, I am doing the alligator
duck build Platypus walk and I'm plugging my own asshole.
When it got to forty eight minutes, I have twenty
text from Baser where are you, hey, Lobby? I didn't
even have the ability to text her back.

Speaker 1 (56:39):
I was in that much pain.

Speaker 3 (56:40):
No idea what it was. It was just my stomach
was weird. I didn't eat right, had maybe some Mexican water,
some Modello's, obviously we were feeling the Modelos.

Speaker 1 (56:48):
That was probably number ten. Honestly hitting you that you're
an NBA champion yet are you so many.

Speaker 2 (56:51):
Times hitting me as those modellos.

Speaker 3 (56:54):
So I get to about fifty minutes and you haven't
found the room, and dude, I met finally at nineteen,
but these numbers are all left up. Nineteen twenty is
the second floor, nineteen which makes sense. Nineteen sixteen is
actually the top floor. It would actually make sense. In
nineteen sixteen was.

Speaker 2 (57:12):
A bottom floor. That's weird, That's what I'm saying, Dude.
Over there in Iceland and Ireland they have like you're
not going to the lobby, you go to floor zero,
like they have zero level floor. They have negative one,
negative two on their elevator. It's wild interesting. If it
goes down below the ground, it's a negative one.

Speaker 1 (57:27):
Okay, that takes a little getting used to it, but
it's tough.

Speaker 3 (57:30):
Night one, darkness, Modella tree, Modela is hitting pretty hard.
Baser texting me fifty minutes were at and I'm finally
at nineteen. I'm going up and down floors and I
this isn't just me being funny or me saying that
something that wasn't actually true.

Speaker 1 (57:46):
I got back to the first floor at fifteen minutes.

Speaker 3 (57:48):
Dude, I had been walking around this resort for fifteen
minutes have to take a shit, and I considered that
I was back on ground level just shit in a bush.

Speaker 1 (57:58):
Dude. It was that it was that bad.

Speaker 2 (58:04):
And at that moment it was fight or flight, and
I go, okay, I mean, am I just gonna pull
on my pants and just.

Speaker 1 (58:10):
Shit in this bush? And then I thought.

Speaker 3 (58:14):
Nineteen sixteen, and Baser said we were penthouse pool side.
I'm poolside and I said, fuck the number.

Speaker 2 (58:23):
I don't give a fuck that nineteen building sixteen should
be on the bottom.

Speaker 1 (58:27):
I don't give a fuck.

Speaker 2 (58:28):
Baser said, nineteen sixteen. It's got to be at the top.
It's got to be at the top.

Speaker 3 (58:34):
And so I don't know what it was, dude, it
was just something in the universe wanted me to not
have to shit in a bush. And I wanted to
cook Cannaberan Costa Rica wherever we were, dude, and I
just started booking upstairs.

Speaker 1 (58:45):
I'm running. I'm running right now like a penguin, duck
billed platypus sheep goat Okay, just running, bro, There are
there are, there are guests, beautiful women with their husbands,
and I'm running with my hand up my asshole, fucking
doing the duck walk. Dude.

Speaker 3 (59:00):
There's kids, there's families, and I am just sprinting, doing
everything I can to hold my poop in. And I
get to the top and it was in front of me.
Nineteen sixteen. It was penthouse, it was pool side. Never
go to your room when you're ten deep, because you
had the specifics failed me at my most important time

(59:21):
of having to take a crap.

Speaker 2 (59:22):
I got into the room. I've never my wristband. I
just started punching the door with it because it had
to activate it, punching it, punching the shit out of it.

Speaker 1 (59:30):
It opened.

Speaker 2 (59:30):
I ran in, grabbed my butt wipes, and when I
your volcano paled in comparison to what happened over the
next ten minutes.

Speaker 1 (59:40):
I mean, and after about five minutes, I had.

Speaker 3 (59:47):
A calm and a relief that I've never felt.

Speaker 1 (59:51):
I would almost cook. Compare it to pregnancy.

Speaker 3 (59:54):
I had given birth, and I finally felt better in
my stomach. After one hour of ducking around a massive
Costa Rican resort that was in kN Kun and I
texted Baser.

Speaker 1 (01:00:09):
It said where are you? I'm about to come back.
What is happening?

Speaker 3 (01:00:12):
What are you doing, I said, I finally went, I went,
get me an espresso Martini. I'm coming I'm coming home,
damn it, I'm coming home, just like Bradley Cooper said
in that movie where it was Deadly Sniper.

Speaker 1 (01:00:33):
He said, called his wife and he said, I'm coming home.
I'm coming home.

Speaker 2 (01:00:40):
And we went back up and dude, we had great
drinks the entire night, and it was it was just
an amazing first night after that. Was it all inclusive? Yeah,
so you don't have to pay for that expresso martini.

Speaker 1 (01:00:50):
Listen, I don't.

Speaker 3 (01:00:51):
I don't have the time or the energy right now
to tell Getting Lost in Mexico.

Speaker 1 (01:00:55):
That needs to be on a different episode.

Speaker 2 (01:00:57):
It'll be on Monday.

Speaker 1 (01:00:57):
Okay, that's the energy I had to tell me.

Speaker 2 (01:01:01):
Having to go to the bathroom was it brought all
those memories back and it was too much for me.

Speaker 1 (01:01:06):
That was too much for me, because you laughed. But
you and me had parallels in.

Speaker 3 (01:01:12):
Two different continents, two different countries, two different time zones,
at the exact same moment. Our insides were exploding and
they were coming out of us. And not to get
too graphic, but we've painted the town brown, dude, and
it very well could have been on the same day

(01:01:32):
that you and me were in the most paid off.

Speaker 1 (01:01:34):
It was so bad.

Speaker 2 (01:01:35):
I mean walking around that airport, I was getting so
pissed off, Like how do they not have a bathroom
that doesn't have poop overflowing the toilet? Like how explain
to me how you are a major airport. It's international
flights coming in and maybe that's the problem. Maybe people
on the international flights hold it in and then they
just unload on those toilets and the toilets can't handle it.

Speaker 1 (01:01:57):
I don't know, dude.

Speaker 3 (01:01:57):
I got asked the plumber they would know we pipe
over there or what. And also it's one of those
things you can't flush. The other stuff, you know, are
people's flushing.

Speaker 2 (01:02:05):
I did meet one girl in Iceland. Her name was Love.
That wasn't her real name. That's the name she went
by because her Icelandic name. Don't ask me, but her boyfriend.

Speaker 1 (01:02:14):
No, I'm not married.

Speaker 2 (01:02:15):
Her boyfriend was a plumber. I should have asked her, Hey,
can you text your boyfriend and ask them about the
pipes at the airport. What's the problem.

Speaker 3 (01:02:22):
There's got to be something people call themselves now besides
a plumber. I mean we changed flight attendant, we changed
teacher to education assistant or something like that, like can
plumber like can we not say a pipe mechanic or
something like that.

Speaker 2 (01:02:35):
Oh man, Well, look, Texas Michigan. That's the big game
this weekend, Iowa, Iowa State. That's a huge game, rivalry game.
I think I think Texas is gonna blow the doors
off of Michigan. Okay, cool, you forgot the biggest game
of the weekend.

Speaker 1 (01:02:52):
What we don't know? You really don't know.

Speaker 2 (01:02:59):
Theiggest game of the weekend. Iowa, Iowa stayed is huge.
Michigan Texas at the big House. That's amazing, even bigger.

Speaker 3 (01:03:11):
You have five seconds, just like you counted down the guyser,
I'm gonna count you down.

Speaker 4 (01:03:16):
Ten nine, eight, seven, six five. Oh ugsa Texas State.

Speaker 1 (01:03:27):
Let's go. It is our college's place. Off.

Speaker 2 (01:03:32):
Who has the biggest nuts on I five? We are
about to take that I thirty five and stick our
nuts in your foes. At the last second, you come
with the biggest game of the weekend. That's broadcast probably
on the nowhere. Yeah it's the ESPN five net network.

(01:03:52):
Oh but I don't have ESPN, So I won't be
able to watch my UTSA Roadrunners take down the Texas
State Bobcats. And I didn't find out that my old
high school Anderson High School are quarterback. Don't know his name,
he has committed to play football at UTSA next year.

Speaker 1 (01:04:10):
Whoa, that's full circle. Yeah, dude, that's all I got. Man.

Speaker 2 (01:04:15):
I gotta say happy birthday to you.

Speaker 1 (01:04:17):
Ray.

Speaker 2 (01:04:17):
I hope you have a great birthday weekend. Don't know
what you're doing if you're having something. We didn't get invited,
so no offense.

Speaker 1 (01:04:24):
I get it. It was kan kun that was my birthday.

Speaker 2 (01:04:27):
Oh yeah, well that's awesome. Well, happy birthday.

Speaker 1 (01:04:29):
But also it's a very weird. Wa wait a.

Speaker 2 (01:04:31):
Minute, you tell me we are battling on Saturday and Sunday.

Speaker 1 (01:04:37):
The Titans play the Bears. Let's go what's Monday?

Speaker 2 (01:04:46):
Dude? My kids are so hyped about the Titans Bears
game because they have been walking around the house ying
Boom Bears, Boo Bears up, Titans up Titans.

Speaker 1 (01:04:59):
What's a Monday team that were fans of NBA? I'm
Memphis and you're.

Speaker 2 (01:05:03):
This Major League Baseball. I don't know, dang ud I
lost my tranny of thought, I mean, I can't wait.
I can't birthday Baser keeps saying, oh kne kun was it?
And I go, hey, you didn't invite anybody over, and
she goes, well, I mean we went to that island
and that was your birthday. Pret oh yeah, but it's

(01:05:23):
like retroactively, she said, yeah, it's like a family vacation. Man,
I don't know that really counts as birthdays.

Speaker 1 (01:05:27):
That's smart though, dude.

Speaker 2 (01:05:28):
Hey that's a good move by her. But yeah, I
mean enjoy a Texas is gonna roll reg and a
rec shop. Bro.

Speaker 3 (01:05:33):
I do the same thing her birthdays on Thanksgiving, so
I so it's you know, you give her a couple
and it's always Hey, I'm gonna get your stuff on
Black Friday.

Speaker 1 (01:05:41):
Smart gives you an extra day.

Speaker 2 (01:05:43):
That's smart. That's gena.

Speaker 1 (01:05:45):
Best prices.

Speaker 2 (01:05:46):
Yeah, I'm gonna get the best price I can get.
Why would I buy it now when it's gonna be
one hundred dollars cheaper on Friday? And I'm gonna say this,
I'm gonna tell I'm gonna give you some locks. All right,
I'm gonna give you some lock.

Speaker 1 (01:05:55):
Well, let me hear at the bed.

Speaker 2 (01:05:58):
Look I don't understand some of these lines. It's opening weekend.
We have no idea what these teams look like. But
I don't know how everybody. You know, what everybody loves
is the flash of the Dolphins. Everybody loves the swiming Dolphins.
You know, Flip and speedy, Tyreek Hill and Tua Tagova
Looa and oh Devin A Chain and Jalen what a guys.

(01:06:22):
No one's talking about the Jaguars. The Jaguars last year,
they didn't live up to expectations. They have redemption on
their mind. They are gonna start the season out. They're
going to Miami. They are getting three and a half points. Dude,
that is way too many points to give the Jags
on opening weekend. Give me the Jacksonville Jaguars plus three

(01:06:44):
and a half and you can take it to the bank.

Speaker 3 (01:06:47):
I got you one. I got a college game. A
lot of people are gonna talk about the Marquis big games.
I'm gonna talk specifically and primarily about a team called
Old Miss. They had a huge week one, they covered,
they put up sixty points.

Speaker 1 (01:06:57):
What happened to my bad? Arnold Miss hit it.

Speaker 3 (01:07:01):
So what I'm saying is they're playing Middle Tennessee State.
It's Baser's alma mater. There's a place there called Jacks.
You go and get absolutely slaughtered. And I have inside information.
I have friends telling me from there that MTSU is
the real deal. Their quarterback is real good. His name's
Nicholas Vita Taddio. He went twenty to thirty five with
a tug. His QBR rating thirty eighth.

Speaker 1 (01:07:24):
That's not a good one.

Speaker 3 (01:07:25):
But uh my point is this, they'll cover you get
forty two MTSU plus forty two against Ole Miss and Jackson,
Darton Keffen and.

Speaker 1 (01:07:35):
Lock it up. Damn It felt good to say that, man.

Speaker 2 (01:07:38):
And you know what else feels good? Bryce Young, God,
Bryce Young. Last year he looked like a freaking middle
school quarterback. He got a new coach. He got a
new coach who's you know, just been working with him,
working with him, tuning everything up. Hey, we're gonna build
you up, boosting that confidence. And they're going down to

(01:07:58):
New Orleans and let me Carolina was kind of feisty
some games last year. And you know who sucked last
year was New Orleans. They were supposed to be so good.
They were not very good. And I think that trend continues.
Carolina is going to New Orleans and they're getting three
and a half points in a division game. Give me
the Carolina, God awful Panthers. Give me Carolina plus three

(01:08:20):
and a half. Take it to the bank. Then we're
gonna give you one last one for the road.

Speaker 1 (01:08:25):
Are we to keep the bed going?

Speaker 2 (01:08:27):
One last one for the road?

Speaker 1 (01:08:29):
Jamal vacation, fuck off.

Speaker 2 (01:08:32):
Jamar Chase has been chilling. I don't even know if
he's playing, but he went back to practice the other
day check D so I'm hoping he's gonna play. But
it doesn't matter. Hey, I'm gonna go with a guy
named Nick Chubb. He's out for a month.

Speaker 1 (01:08:44):
Uh.

Speaker 2 (01:08:45):
They are playing. They are playing the hapless New England Patriots.
Tom Brady's not walking through that door. It's Jacoby Brissette
and a bunch of I don't know who else is
playing on that team. Couldn't Ramandre Stevenson, Remandra. I don't
know who they have a wide receiver. They don't have
Juju anymore. They don't have Julian Edelman. They don't have

(01:09:06):
Dion Branch, they don't have Randy Moss. I don't know
who they have they traded away judea On.

Speaker 1 (01:09:12):
He got some Henry guy at tight end.

Speaker 2 (01:09:14):
Is he still on their team? Yeah, well it doesn't
matter because the Bengals are gonna start it out. Joe Burrow,
that wrist, that risk is looking good for at least
one week. You got to take the Bengals minus eight
and a half, take it to the bank and we out.

Speaker 1 (01:09:30):
Thank god. Dude, Hey in Texas, you can take that
to the bank.

Speaker 2 (01:09:34):
They're rolling. They're rolling Michigan. All right, have a good weekend.
Football is back in Michigan. I thought their quarterback was
that guy pussy What was his name, Puka or something? No, no, no,
he got beat by a walk on.

Speaker 1 (01:09:48):
Right, yeah, he's like the backup.

Speaker 2 (01:09:50):
He had like the walk on as the quarterback. I
don't think that's That doesn't bode well for Michigan.

Speaker 3 (01:09:54):
Watch out for Donovan Edwards. He's got speed. Who's that
running back? I think that's the name.

Speaker 2 (01:09:59):
Oh okay, all right, everybody, have a good weekend, Arnold,
have fun, enjoy yourself. We'll get it. We'll get to
it next week. Man, all right, we out it's gonna
be Niners and the Niners gonna win the Super Bowl.
Who are they gonna play is the question. I want
to say Texans. Even though I think the Texans are

(01:10:20):
gonna regress the harder schedule, I still think they're really good.
So let's take a flyer now. I'm not gonna take that.
Niners versus Chiefs, Niners, Texans, Niners win the Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 (01:10:30):
I say Lions and Chiefs.

Speaker 2 (01:10:35):
Yeah, yeah, yeah,

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