Third Street Promenade pitches public drinking to boost business. Inland Empire residents stock up on supplies as imports expected to shrink. After murder in Valley Village apartment, residents are furious with management. Interview with Beth Bigler, Author, "Honoring Our Animals", and Pet Loss/Grief counselor
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
You're listening to KFI AM six forty on demand.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Saturdays, it is time to one one. The week's been hot.
Time to ease my money sign on my radio just
inside Tiffany Howes Gobbi Feel fun Jay Saturday.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Right KFI AM six forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 4 (00:31):
Tiffy Hobbs here with you.
Speaker 3 (00:32):
It is Saturdays with Tiffany as the Beautiful Song now
says from five to seven pm every Saturday right here.
I just want to give a thank you really quickly
to everyone who's reached out online. I've gotten a lot
of positive feedback, great commentary. People have come up to
me in person in different ways or send a message
(00:54):
through someone else just to say that you are enjoying
the show. So it truly means a lot. I appreciate that,
and I hope you continue to listen every Saturday. And
this Saturday is melancholy for me because of Andrew Caravella
giving us his swan song, his best last show on Saturday.
(01:17):
And I know you're waving and heal it's radio, but
he's waving and I'm sad. And I told Andrew earlier
quickly that he was the first person in the newsroom
to welcome me back when I was doing fill ins
on Saturdays or fill ins on Sundays. And as a
new personality on the station, it can be intimidating, it
(01:39):
can be a lot. And when you come into an
environment and you're new and someone welcomes you not just
with words, but with genuine concern and care and a
hug and kindness, and that's what Andrew has maintained this
entire time.
Speaker 4 (01:55):
It means so much.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
So I know you are on to greener pasture, so
to speak, just different things. And I'm very happy for you, Andrew,
and I will be sorry to.
Speaker 4 (02:06):
See you go.
Speaker 5 (02:06):
You got my number. We can text, we can send
inappropriate memes of people always.
Speaker 4 (02:12):
And they never do it.
Speaker 3 (02:13):
People always say we'll keep in touch, and they never do.
So I really hope we do.
Speaker 5 (02:16):
I'm not as la as I let people on to
believe when I'm here on the.
Speaker 4 (02:22):
Air, because you're hysteria. That's why hysteria hysteria as we
heard now.
Speaker 5 (02:27):
I am born and raised southern California, and I do
have a lot of that Valley esque in my personality. Way, No,
that never could tell like totally right. Oh, as if
but I am a pretty true friend, so yes, and
you've been that for me and I thank you, my friend,
for that. And congratulations on your next venture, whatever that
shall be.
Speaker 4 (02:47):
Thank you.
Speaker 3 (02:47):
You're most welcome. What a show we have in store today.
Like I mentioned with Neil, we have renowned pet grief counselor,
educator and now author Beth Biggler coming on at to
discuss her work and her new book Honoring Our Animals.
Then at six point thirty, we have Judy Mancuso coming on.
(03:09):
She's been on with us before, on the program before.
She's an author and the executive director of the animal
advocacy group Social Compassion and Legislation. She's coming back to
give us an update about the found Act aka Oreos
Law and what that was born out of. They've just
had a huge win this Found Act and Social Compassion
(03:33):
in Legislation, so we'll get news on that, and Judy
will be joined by Casey Covin.
Speaker 4 (03:39):
You know him.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
His story of rescue went viral when his pups were
at home during the Palisades fire.
Speaker 4 (03:46):
You remember him. He was outside of his side of his.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
Home going tikatika, tikatika. That's the thing that everyone remembers
him calling his dog and his dog Tikatika, running up
to him once read rescued in that Palisades fire.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
Well, that story went viral.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
It inspired the found Act aka Oreo's Law, and Oreo's
Law actually is from his second pup, another pup that
was rescued at the same time, and so we'll find
out what this Found Act is now evolving into. Updates
on that. At six PM. Will take our Deeper Dive
(04:25):
for our Deeper Dive segment because the La County Fair
kicked off yesterday, so we'll get into the history of
the fair, some fun info about the food because everyone
wants to know what the food is at the fair,
plus some things you should look out for for this
fair season. We also have some breaking news. All the
local outlets have the story. I just saw it flashed
(04:47):
across the screen from ABC seven. A small plane went
down in Semi Valley and unfortunately the pilot, who is
at this time unnamed, was pronounced deceased on this scene.
And this plane crashed into not one but two houses
in this Semi Valley neighborhood, and the houses and plane,
(05:08):
I guess one up in flames. So We'll get updates
as they come in, so stay tuned for that. If
that makes you stressed out that last bit of news,
then soon you'll be able to go to Third Street Promenade,
which will now be referred to as Bourbon Street West,
to drown your sorrows and ease your anxieties.
Speaker 4 (05:29):
What could go wrong?
Speaker 6 (05:30):
We're talking about how Santa Monica City Council members are
considering a proposal to bring public drinking back to the
struggling Third Street Promenade there and said, Santa Monica, las.
Speaker 7 (05:40):
What could go wrong?
Speaker 1 (05:41):
What could go wrong? But hey, look they need to
take business back there.
Speaker 7 (05:44):
An agreement on that, but let's work our way towards
that point. First of all, as you just heard Santa
Monica City Council weighing the possibility of allowing people to
prowl around with drinks in their hands as they shop
and take in the sites on the Third Street Promenade.
The idea here being that people just be comfortable to
buy a drink at one of the local leteries and
then cruise around and then it would enliven things. At
(06:07):
least that's potentially the idea. In fact, Andrew Thomas, the
CEO of Downtown Santa Monica, Inc. Think this is a
swell idea. Here's what he had to say.
Speaker 3 (06:16):
I think it's a great idea.
Speaker 8 (06:17):
I think it's the biggest thing to happen to the
promenade since the promenade was built.
Speaker 7 (06:21):
Yeah, it's one perspective. Another would be that in a
mall where you're seeing numerous vacancies, declining sales, and ongoing
challenges the street life, maybe introducing public drunkenness into the
mix isn't the best possible idea. Moreover, it's hard to
see how putting a drink in everyone's hand enhances the
family friendliness of the Third Street promenade where there's at
(06:44):
least one toy store. At least there used to be
when I would go there with my kid. Now, if
approved by the city, this would be the first drink
and shop zone in all of California.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
What could go wrong on Bourbon Street West?
Speaker 8 (06:59):
Oh my god, exaggeration.
Speaker 4 (07:01):
Let people have fun. Have you seen what fun looks
like nowadays? What fun goes for? You know what?
Speaker 8 (07:06):
Miami has this beat so much on fun, like people
having a good time drinking till late.
Speaker 4 (07:13):
We need that in La This is a great idea.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Do we yes, we do.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
Do we not already have some element of punk public drunkenness.
Speaker 8 (07:21):
Because it's illegal, h.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
So legalize it, is what you're saying, Just like with
the weed, and now we smell weed everywhere and it's fine.
Speaker 9 (07:30):
Is it?
Speaker 3 (07:30):
Oh for some for oh you're out in yourself as Oh,
you know, I guess it's Look at the time, it's
time to go to news, isn't it. When we come back,
we're going to talk about the tariffs briefly because there's
an area of southern California that is especially nervous about
what the tariffs will bring. So we'll get into that
and more on the other side of the break. Remember
(07:52):
five thirty we have Beth Biggler coming on the renowned
Pet Grief Counselor, so make sure you stay too for that.
It's Saturdays with Tiffany right here on KFI AM six
forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 1 (08:06):
You're listening to KFI AM six forty on demand kf I.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
AM six forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app. Saturdays
with Tiffany here until seven pm. And we were just
talking about the new potential allowance of public drinking at
the Santa Monica Promenade, of which Raoul is very pro.
Oh no, if I'm pro, I kind of think it
(08:33):
might be setting us up or them, at least in
Santa Monica for some interesting interactions, especially since Palissades High
School is now positioned right there at that sears, just
a block or so away from the promenade, So you're
going to have these kids after school mixing with public drunkenness.
Speaker 4 (08:54):
Did you drink when you're in high school? I did not,
And I'm not just saying that on air. I didn't either.
I didn't.
Speaker 3 (09:01):
I waited, Kayla, did you drink when she's drinking now
I'm drunking?
Speaker 5 (09:08):
I actually wait until I was twenty one.
Speaker 4 (09:10):
Oh yeah, I wasn't allowed to drink. I did like
once in high school. Yeah yeah, but I wasn't really
allowed to drink its I was twenty one. I was
a real follower.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
Yeah, like snuck a wine cooler, you know, like but
that that was at Hollme or you know, someone brought
something to a party. I was always really afraid that
I was going to get caught, so I didn't do it.
Speaker 4 (09:27):
Raoul, No, I agree, you can't have kids drinking. But oh,
thank you. I think we are right. But let's talk
about Raoul.
Speaker 8 (09:34):
Well, no, I'm just saying nightlife is such a powerful force. Yeah,
and we fall so short on nightlife in La. Yeah,
we do, and especially at beach cities. Like where do
you go to have fun at the beach and enjoy
night life?
Speaker 4 (09:49):
You don't.
Speaker 3 (09:49):
Everything closes at like ten my point exactly, you know.
So I understand wanting this to be a revenue stream,
and it does. The promenade does need it. The city
of Santa Monica will benefit from it, especially as the
tourist season picks up. They will have to have some
pretty strict parameters. I'm thinking some high high gates to
keep all of the public drunkenness contained to the promenade.
(10:12):
People shouldn't just be wandering around. Let's say you want
to drink at home. Let's say you don't want to
go to the promenade. You want to purchase your own libations,
your own snacks, and that some of your food and
drink does not necessarily come from the Great State. And
I say that tongue in cheek of California.
Speaker 4 (10:28):
It is imported.
Speaker 3 (10:29):
It comes from somewhere else. Well, these tariffs are about
to take effect and imports are predicted to shrink drastically.
So what are people doing. Well, they're hoarding.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
Food and home products. Some say is costing more.
Speaker 7 (10:46):
Every day and ask.
Speaker 9 (10:47):
How much you spend more?
Speaker 4 (10:49):
How much did we just spend?
Speaker 7 (10:50):
You spent sixty five?
Speaker 4 (10:51):
I spend twenty two.
Speaker 10 (10:53):
We met Stacey Tahiti nine our son Edward as they
picked up a few items from this Eastville shopping center.
Speaker 7 (10:58):
Is that more or less the budget?
Speaker 3 (11:00):
No, Like, my gosh, you can't even buy anything for
sixty five dollars anymore.
Speaker 10 (11:06):
Next week, incoming cargo volume to the US from China
is expected to drop, according to the Port of Los Angeles,
as the impacts of President Trump's tariffs are forcing many
companies to scale back on their orders.
Speaker 6 (11:18):
We may not have as much selection as we are
normally used to when.
Speaker 1 (11:22):
We're looking for the goods that we like to buy.
Speaker 7 (11:24):
At the consumer level.
Speaker 10 (11:28):
Today, we took a look at prices in the Inland
Empire and found many popular items were made outside the US,
from drugs to candles and other everyday home good products.
Speaker 3 (11:38):
Well, you know, hoard hoarding is something that unfortunately We've
gotten really accustomed to COVID to now any sort of scare,
any sort of panic induces panic buying. And as you
hear right there in the Inland Empire and likely elsewhere,
is probably coming to your neighborhood soon, if it hasn't already.
Shelves are going bare because people are trying to get
(12:01):
ahead of what they perceive as being drastic price increases.
What a decrease a major decrease of inventory, I know,
I've seen it. I've definitely noticed that the shelves are
not as plentiful, and online things are a bit more expensive.
Speaker 4 (12:17):
So I don't know what to make of that, But
I am also.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
Of the fray that something is coming and I don't
know exactly how to navigate it. Uh, something that people
shouldn't have to navigate. Murder, definitely not especially in your home. Well,
in one Valley Village apartment complex, residents are furious with
the management because they say a murderer got in and
(12:43):
that there were no security precautions to prevent what happened next.
Speaker 11 (12:47):
We've been speaking to residents all day, and some of
them told is that they actually contacted authorities. They called
nine to one one the morning of April twenty third,
after they say they heard loud noises coming from a
unit inside the building while that commotion, that altercation may
have been a fight between the tenant and his attacker.
Speaker 9 (13:06):
Once he's sixteen nine website Drive.
Speaker 11 (13:08):
Apartment KTLA obtained police dispatch audio placed on Wednesday, April
twenty third, the morning of a suspected murder. A resident
inside Ashton Sherman Village apartment's contacted authorities after hearing a
loud commotion coming from the upper unit here on the
fifth floor, this apartment where fifty three year old Menashhedra
was viciously killed.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
Because the un said the.
Speaker 9 (13:32):
Pair, here's two males fighting and wrestling, sting and yelling.
Speaker 11 (13:36):
We got a closer look at the area around the
crime scene, the hallways that investigators believe the suspect cased
before the crime. You see that individual recorded on surveillance
footage going unit to unit trying the door handles, attempting
to break in.
Speaker 12 (13:50):
I found out Tuesday morning from one of my neighbors.
He said, have you heard the nine one one call yet?
And I said no, So he played it for me
and on Wednesday, the neighbor below Oh called nine one one.
I'm not sure what time it was, but he heard
two men fighting and wrestling, and when the police came,
I guess it was quiet, so they.
Speaker 11 (14:12):
Didn't go inside.
Speaker 12 (14:14):
And so the guy must have been dead for a
couple days.
Speaker 11 (14:17):
While that police dispatch audio was from April twenty third,
officers didn't find Hedraw's body until days later.
Speaker 3 (14:24):
All right, Well, that is terrible news and absolutely disconcerting
if you're expecting security in your got to be secured
apartment building, you're building your dwelling of any sort.
Speaker 4 (14:36):
And this story is continuing to unfold.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
I've seen quite a few comments from people who live
in that building saying that they saw that security footage
of the person, this suspect lurking around the building and
trying other doorknobs, looking into ways to possibly breach entrances
into other people's apartments. So that is horrible and I
hope that they can get a handle on that. That
(14:58):
mugshot picture is out if you know this suspect, because
someone does, of course, report it to authorities asap.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
God bless those people out there.
Speaker 3 (15:09):
Just want to mention that our next guest will be
coming on at five point thirty. But I want to
preface it by saying this conversation might be difficult. This
conversation involves pet loss. The loss of a pet, and
the loss of a pet is hard. It's the absolute
most difficult part about loving an animal.
Speaker 4 (15:28):
I've been there numerous.
Speaker 3 (15:30):
Times, so I just want to warn you that this
next conversation will likely touch your emotions. Pet loss is
complicated because people don't understand how deep bonds can be
with pets and when a pet passes, how deeply we
mourn them when they're gone. So we're going to talk
to a renowned pet grief counselor. Her name is Beth Bigler.
(15:52):
She has a new book out, and she's going to
talk about her book, the work that she's done, and
everything inside of pet grief. When we come back right
here on Saturdays with Tiffany, it's KFI AM six forty
live everywhere on the iHeartRadio apps.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
You're listening to KFI AM six forty on demand KFI.
Speaker 3 (16:15):
AM six forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app Saturdays
with Tiffany here until seven, and our next guess is
Beth Biggler. Losing a pet is one of the hardest
things that anyone can do. If you've ever lost a
pet had a pet pass on, then you understand just
(16:37):
how insurmountable that grief is and how complicated it can be.
Speaker 4 (16:43):
People may not understand well.
Speaker 3 (16:46):
Psychologists call this type of grief disenfranchised grief, which they
say is a result of empathy failure. People then deny
their own pet grief because a part of them feel
that it's shameful. Beth Bigler is not a denier of
her grief. When her cat, Arnie, her soulmate, Her soulmate
(17:09):
cat passed away, his physical loss turned into an emotional gain. Together,
propelled by their love and want to help others, Beth
and Arnie support people through the pain of losing a
beloved animal. Beth's book, Honoring Our Animals is a guide
to not denying the grief of mourning a pet, but
(17:30):
instead to acknowledging it and using it to still live
a full life through meditations, affirmations, and intentional practices that
honor grief as a sacred continuation of love. Please welcome
Beth Bigler, renowned pet loss grief counselor, educator and author
(17:51):
to the show Hi.
Speaker 9 (17:52):
Beth Lay Tistany. It's great to be here, and thank
you for normalizing and validating pet loss grief.
Speaker 3 (18:00):
I appreciate the work that you do, and I'm so
grateful that you are with us today to have this
conversation about why normalizing pet grief is so important and
why minimizing the grief that people feel is extremely harmful
and also really delegitimizes or illegitimizes what pet relationships can be.
(18:24):
Let's jump right into some questions that I have for you,
because I could keep you on for the entirety of
this show. I have experienced pet loss numerous times, and
I count myself as fortunate to having been through that
because that means I loved an animal, and I was
loved by an animal, just like in a marriage or
(18:45):
a longtime relationship. It's said that people eventually start to
look like their animals. And it's funny because I looked
at a picture of you and Arnie, your soul cat,
and you guys actually started to face each other physically.
Did you also share any personality traits with Arnie?
Speaker 4 (19:05):
And if so, what, well.
Speaker 9 (19:08):
That's the best compliment ever, because he is one handsome cat.
Speaker 13 (19:11):
I tell you, handsome boy, Well, you know, I love
to believe that all the gifts, guidance, lessons, and teachings
that Arnie brought into my life are living within me,
and it's part of the work I do.
Speaker 9 (19:23):
To help others. Arnie taught me a lot about self worth.
He taught me a lot about acceptance. He taught me
that even on my worst day, having a bad moment,
I was still okay in his eyes. He taught me
to be hopeful. He taught me to believe that the
world can bring me good things even when times feel
really hard, and I like to think I embody some
(19:44):
of those traits today. He bolstered everything about me that
needed bolstering, and taught me a lot about love, being loved,
accepting love, and feeling deserving of love.
Speaker 3 (19:55):
I believe that what he gave you are so selfless,
giving to your clients, to your friends, to your family,
and to people who need it. So again, thank you
for your work. You've bet You've spoken about your relationship
with Arnie on other platforms. I've watched you speak, I've
read your words, and one thing that stood out to
(20:18):
me was the concept of rest. You said that Arnie
taught you how to basically stop and be present. When
he would lay on you, he would force you to
just pause and be in the moment. How did that
message of rest of being present from Arnie guide you
once he passed?
Speaker 9 (20:39):
Well, I think so many of us struggle with always
feeling like we need to be more and do more
and take more things on. It feels like for everybody
I know, we all struggle with the concept of taking
time to slow down, be more present, be more mindful,
and be in the moment. And isn't that one of
the greatest gifts that all of our beloved companions teach us.
(21:01):
They are so in the moment. They are not ruminating
about the past, they are not future tripping about what
horrible things may come. But they are right here, right now.
And so, you know, when Arnie was Earth's side, he
definitely taught me a lot about you know, hey, take
time to rest, take time to rejuvenate, take time to restore.
I think of those times often as times that he
(21:22):
was helping me fill my cups. You know. So, now
he is not Earth'side, but of course our relationship continues,
our bond continues to evolve and expand, and I keep
that very mindful. You know, my job is hectic. I
help dozens and dozens of grievers every week, supporting them
in one on one sessions and groups and through my
Instagram community. So I'm always listening to Arnie when he
(21:45):
reminds me to take a moment, even if that's just
a moment to look up at the sun and feel
the rays on my face, or even when I'm waiting
to stop light. Sometimes I'll just close my eyes for
a moment, connecting with him, take a deep breath, and
just ground myself back to present. And I find it
really helpless with my days now as much as it
did when he was Earth's side.
Speaker 3 (22:04):
You know, I love that you speak that way about
Arnie because it's very obvious, very evident to anyone who
listens to you, that Arnie was your family. It's undeniable
that he was your family. And you use the word
guardian quite a bit when talking about pets and humans,
and we're thought to be their guardians. Are pets while
(22:25):
they're here earthside? Once they pass, does that relationship change?
Do they become our guardians?
Speaker 9 (22:33):
It's a beautiful question, you know. And these relationships with
our beloved, as I know are different person to person.
You know, some people really view their beloveds sort of
in a childlike role. You know, people say, oh, that's
my fur baby, but that's my child. And some people
really feel that other people feel that they're beloved is
a protector for them earthside as well as after their transition.
(22:57):
So I think it's a deeply personal relationship for us. Undeniably,
I do Petsa's family. They are every bit as valid
and important as human family members. And in fact, when
I'm working with people about grief awareness and advocacy, I say, hey,
you know, if you have someone in your life who's
beloved transitions, please treat it as if you would treat
a human loss. So please treat it with the same dignity,
(23:18):
respect in any of the actions you would take to
support them if it were a human loss. Because I
think part of the cultural shift I'm hoping to see
is that we do treat our family members, our animal
family members, on an equal level as human family members,
and that would certainly help support grievers as they go.
Speaker 3 (23:34):
Absolutely, And that goes right back to how I started
this segment in this conversation, with the fact that psychologists
have named this grief, that it is particulars specific, and
that it is called disenfranchised grief, which then amounts to
empathy failure. Empathy failure people not wanting to express grief
(23:55):
because they don't feel that others will understand. They feel
a shame to have love to pad and to mourn
a pet this deeply. And I'm really thankful that you
again are making this a common part of the of
the conversation of the lexicon, that this is normal. It
should be normal, because anything less than this would be
(24:15):
a huge disservice and a huge disqualifier to the love
that we feel for our pet family members.
Speaker 9 (24:23):
I really appreciate you naming it as this enfranchised grief.
That's a new term for many people. They've never heard
it before, and even naming it for grievers who are
listening right now is so impactful, because you know, until
you know there's a name for a grief that isn't
really openly acknowledged or socially mourned or publicly supported, you
sometimes might feel like you're all alone in it, and
so you're right. Grievers often feel shame about this, or
(24:46):
they start to doubt the validity of it because we
are still in a culture of oh, well, it's just
a dog, or it's only a cat, or get another one,
right right. I think that people say and our culture
did not recognize this as significant loss. And I'm really
hoping that more conversations like this can start to change that.
Speaker 3 (25:02):
Well, Beth, I'd love to continue this conversation on the
other side of the break, and I want to get
into next when we come back, what people who are
still managing the fires, the situation and the palisades in
the Pasadena Altadena area, those people who have yet to
recover their pets, what they can do to hopefully start
(25:24):
to heal. Let's continue this conversation on the other side.
Speaker 4 (25:27):
Is that okay?
Speaker 9 (25:29):
Sounds great?
Speaker 4 (25:30):
Awesome. We're talking with Beth Biggler.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
She is a renowned pet loss grief counselor, educator and
now author, and we will be getting into more questions
as well as Beth's wonderful new book entitled Honoring Our
Animals on the Other Side of the Break, So stay
right here with us on Saturdays with Tiffany. It's KFI
(25:53):
AM six forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
You're listening to KFI AM six forty KF.
Speaker 3 (26:00):
I AM six forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app.
It's Tiffany Hobbs here with you for Saturdays with Tiffany,
and we're talking to Beth Bigler and she is just
a force, an absolute force.
Speaker 4 (26:13):
She's a renowned pet loss grief.
Speaker 3 (26:15):
Counselor and educator and a new author and we're going
to get into her book, Honoring Our Animals in just
a moment. But before we do, Beth, thanks again for
being on the show. I want to welcome you back
and I want to jump right back into our question.
Speaker 4 (26:30):
So we just have seen the.
Speaker 3 (26:34):
Terrible fires that took over southern California, Altadina, Pasadena with
the Eton Fire, the Palisades Fire. Everything is still underway.
We are still absolutely in the throes of recovery and
this will go on for years. And while people and
municipalities are focusing on land and on structures and the
(26:57):
monetary aspect of fire recovery, what is getting lost is
the emotional toll of people who.
Speaker 4 (27:05):
Have yet to recover their pets.
Speaker 3 (27:08):
So many pets were rescued, thankfully, so and I know
you got Arnie from Pasadena Humane who has done amazing work,
but there are also still thousands of animals that are
yet to be accounted for, and because of that, being
in limbo, people are not necessarily able to start the
grieving process.
Speaker 4 (27:30):
What do you say to that?
Speaker 3 (27:31):
What do you say to the grieving process, which is
usually dependent on answers when there are simply no answers.
Speaker 9 (27:39):
Well, my heart goes out to everybody who's been impacted
by these fires. It's a devastating situation for guardians and
their beloved and of course the sort of situation you're right,
it goes on for a long time. There will be
a lot of ripple effect in the grief from this,
and so my heartaches for everyone who's been impacted. And
I'd like to name this that you we talk earlier
(28:00):
about the power of naming them Ambiguous loss. Ambiguous loss
is a term, and it's a term that we use
when we have a situation like this where we have
no documentation necessarily to account for the loss. So along
with ambiguous loss comes ambiguous grief. So there's actually a term,
and if any of you are experiencing this, I want
(28:21):
you to know there's a name for it. You can
read about it, you can learn more about it, to
put some support around what you're feeling. And this is
very difficult, right because we don't have quote closure, We
don't know maybe what happened. We have a lot of
unanswered questions alongside things like anger, guilt, frustration, and of
course huge sadness. So in this situation, there are a
(28:44):
lot of things to tend to. But the number one thing,
if I could gift anyone anything, would be self compassion.
Really recognize that you are going through a difficult thing,
Be kind to yourself, speak kindly to yourself, take good
care of yourself. You of course didn't not mean for
this to happen, and the situation was absolutely beyond your control.
(29:06):
And in this type of situation sometimes it's supportive to say, well,
what can I do? What can I put into my control?
So whatever feels right for you in terms of if
you are searching, if you are looking, doing what you
can in the present, but also a permission slip if
you would like to do something else, if you would
like to have a memorial, if you would like to
(29:27):
have a funeral for your beloved, that's okay too. There's
no right or wrong way to cope with this. The
thing we want to do is bring support to our
unanswered questions. And sometimes those unanswered questions can be so uncomfortable.
And it's okay to have those unanswered questions. And I
advise people, if you're struggling with unanswered questions, write them
all down, give them a place to go. Some people
(29:50):
like to write down all the unanswered questions and then
tear up the piece of paper and do a ritual
with it. Right, so giving yourself permission to wrestle with
those questions. And also this is not right for everyone,
but for some people. Perhaps you choose to believe the
story you want to believe about what happened to your
(30:10):
beloved if you don't know, there is no harm in
choosing to believe what you want to believe about the circumstances.
And it's okay to make some choices about what you
want to believe, what you want to tell yourself about
what may have happened.
Speaker 3 (30:26):
New terms ambiguous loss and ambiguous grief. Thank you for those.
Something that's not ambiguous by any stretch of the imagination
is your new book. It is very clear cut, it
is very it has very clear objectives. Congratulations on your book,
Honoring Our Animals just released April twenty second, and you
(30:49):
call it a collaboration between you and Arnie to help
people move through their grief. Each page has a daily objective.
There are three hundred and sixty five days worth of
this work to help people move through their grief. Can
you tell us where to purchase your book and also
(31:10):
any pages that might stand out to you?
Speaker 9 (31:12):
Well? Absolutely. The book is available for pre order now
on Amazon. The release date is going to be June third,
one month from today, and it's available at any bookstore
you want to go to. Go to your local bookstore,
go to bookshop dot org, or you are of course
welcome Amazon, Barnes and Noble. I wrote this book because
I've sat with hundreds and hundreds of grieving guardians and
(31:34):
I've heard what they are struggling with. And I aim
to bring all the people I work with tools, practical
things they can do, and words of comfort. So in
this book, I have three hundred and sixty five very digestible,
approachable meditations, one for every day of the year, so
you can reflect on this at some point in your day.
There's a little invitation at the end of every meditation
(31:56):
with a concrete action stuff you can do like a
ritual or fighting prompt, or way to feel more connected
to your beloved. And in these pages you'll find ways
to of course support all of your grief symptoms and
big feelings. You will find ways to feel more connected
to your beloved, and you will also find some ways
to support your own self discovery and identity. So it's
a beautiful gift for any griever in your life who's struggling,
(32:19):
and it's a beautiful gift for yourself regardless of when
your loss occurred or what the circumstances were.
Speaker 3 (32:25):
As Arnie was and continues to be a gift to you,
your beloved cat soul Cat Arnie, you are a gift
to us. Beth Biggler, thank you so very much for
coming on our show, and you can follow her on
Instagram at Honoring our Animals or by searching Beth Biggler
on Instagram. Go out get that book. It is beautiful.
(32:47):
I told my producer Kayla off Air, I'm absolutely purchasing
it for myself in anticipation of what could come in
the future, because I have pets, and you know, it's
just the way of the world and for people I
know who are going through the grieving process currently. So
Beth Bigler, thank you so very much for coming on
(33:08):
Saturdays with Tiffany. Please tell Arnie when you speak to
him next to say hi to all my pups and
my kittens on that other side.
Speaker 9 (33:15):
They couldn't have a better ambassador.
Speaker 3 (33:17):
I'll let him know you're really, really, really kind and
I appreciate you.
Speaker 4 (33:22):
Thank you, Beth and everyone.
Speaker 3 (33:24):
Make sure you go out and you pick up that
book Honoring Our Animals at all your local bookstores and
you can get it online and follow Beth again at
Honoring our Animals on Instagram and you'll find all of
the affiliate links right there. When we come back, we're
going to get into our deeper Dives segment. We're going
to look at the La County Fair, the history of
the fair, some things you don't know, the food. We
(33:46):
all love to talk about the food, and some things
you might know, and things you can anticipate in this
next fair season, which just kicked off yesterday, so weather permitting,
get out there and enjoy the fair.
Speaker 4 (33:59):
We'll talk about it. Come back.
Speaker 3 (34:00):
It's kf I Am six forty live everywhere on the
iHeartRadio app kf I
Speaker 1 (34:05):
AM six forty on demand
You're listening to KFI AM six forty on demand.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Saturdays, it is time to one one. The week's been hot.
Time to ease my money sign on my radio just
inside Tiffany Howes Gobbi Feel fun Jay Saturday.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Right KFI AM six forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 4 (00:31):
Tiffy Hobbs here with you.
Speaker 3 (00:32):
It is Saturdays with Tiffany as the Beautiful Song now
says from five to seven pm every Saturday right here.
I just want to give a thank you really quickly
to everyone who's reached out online. I've gotten a lot
of positive feedback, great commentary. People have come up to
me in person in different ways or send a message
(00:54):
through someone else just to say that you are enjoying
the show. So it truly means a lot. I appreciate that,
and I hope you continue to listen every Saturday. And
this Saturday is melancholy for me because of Andrew Caravella
giving us his swan song, his best last show on Saturday.
(01:17):
And I know you're waving and heal it's radio, but
he's waving and I'm sad. And I told Andrew earlier
quickly that he was the first person in the newsroom
to welcome me back when I was doing fill ins
on Saturdays or fill ins on Sundays. And as a
new personality on the station, it can be intimidating, it
(01:39):
can be a lot. And when you come into an
environment and you're new and someone welcomes you not just
with words, but with genuine concern and care and a
hug and kindness, and that's what Andrew has maintained this
entire time.
Speaker 4 (01:55):
It means so much.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
So I know you are on to greener pasture, so
to speak, just different things. And I'm very happy for you, Andrew,
and I will be sorry to.
Speaker 4 (02:06):
See you go.
Speaker 5 (02:06):
You got my number. We can text, we can send
inappropriate memes of people always.
Speaker 4 (02:12):
And they never do it.
Speaker 3 (02:13):
People always say we'll keep in touch, and they never do.
So I really hope we do.
Speaker 5 (02:16):
I'm not as la as I let people on to
believe when I'm here on the.
Speaker 4 (02:22):
Air, because you're hysteria. That's why hysteria hysteria as we
heard now.
Speaker 5 (02:27):
I am born and raised southern California, and I do
have a lot of that Valley esque in my personality. Way, No,
that never could tell like totally right. Oh, as if
but I am a pretty true friend, so yes, and
you've been that for me and I thank you, my friend,
for that. And congratulations on your next venture, whatever that
shall be.
Speaker 4 (02:47):
Thank you.
Speaker 3 (02:47):
You're most welcome. What a show we have in store today.
Like I mentioned with Neil, we have renowned pet grief counselor,
educator and now author Beth Biggler coming on at to
discuss her work and her new book Honoring Our Animals.
Then at six point thirty, we have Judy Mancuso coming on.
(03:09):
She's been on with us before, on the program before.
She's an author and the executive director of the animal
advocacy group Social Compassion and Legislation. She's coming back to
give us an update about the found Act aka Oreos
Law and what that was born out of. They've just
had a huge win this Found Act and Social Compassion
(03:33):
in Legislation, so we'll get news on that, and Judy
will be joined by Casey Covin.
Speaker 4 (03:39):
You know him.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
His story of rescue went viral when his pups were
at home during the Palisades fire.
Speaker 4 (03:46):
You remember him. He was outside of his side of his.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
Home going tikatika, tikatika. That's the thing that everyone remembers
him calling his dog and his dog Tikatika, running up
to him once read rescued in that Palisades fire.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
Well, that story went viral.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
It inspired the found Act aka Oreo's Law, and Oreo's
Law actually is from his second pup, another pup that
was rescued at the same time, and so we'll find
out what this Found Act is now evolving into. Updates
on that. At six PM. Will take our Deeper Dive
(04:25):
for our Deeper Dive segment because the La County Fair
kicked off yesterday, so we'll get into the history of
the fair, some fun info about the food because everyone
wants to know what the food is at the fair,
plus some things you should look out for for this
fair season. We also have some breaking news. All the
local outlets have the story. I just saw it flashed
(04:47):
across the screen from ABC seven. A small plane went
down in Semi Valley and unfortunately the pilot, who is
at this time unnamed, was pronounced deceased on this scene.
And this plane crashed into not one but two houses
in this Semi Valley neighborhood, and the houses and plane,
(05:08):
I guess one up in flames. So We'll get updates
as they come in, so stay tuned for that. If
that makes you stressed out that last bit of news,
then soon you'll be able to go to Third Street Promenade,
which will now be referred to as Bourbon Street West,
to drown your sorrows and ease your anxieties.
Speaker 4 (05:29):
What could go wrong?
Speaker 6 (05:30):
We're talking about how Santa Monica City Council members are
considering a proposal to bring public drinking back to the
struggling Third Street Promenade there and said, Santa Monica, las.
Speaker 7 (05:40):
What could go wrong?
Speaker 1 (05:41):
What could go wrong? But hey, look they need to
take business back there.
Speaker 7 (05:44):
An agreement on that, but let's work our way towards
that point. First of all, as you just heard Santa
Monica City Council weighing the possibility of allowing people to
prowl around with drinks in their hands as they shop
and take in the sites on the Third Street Promenade.
The idea here being that people just be comfortable to
buy a drink at one of the local leteries and
then cruise around and then it would enliven things. At
(06:07):
least that's potentially the idea. In fact, Andrew Thomas, the
CEO of Downtown Santa Monica, Inc. Think this is a
swell idea. Here's what he had to say.
Speaker 3 (06:16):
I think it's a great idea.
Speaker 8 (06:17):
I think it's the biggest thing to happen to the
promenade since the promenade was built.
Speaker 7 (06:21):
Yeah, it's one perspective. Another would be that in a
mall where you're seeing numerous vacancies, declining sales, and ongoing
challenges the street life, maybe introducing public drunkenness into the
mix isn't the best possible idea. Moreover, it's hard to
see how putting a drink in everyone's hand enhances the
family friendliness of the Third Street promenade where there's at
(06:44):
least one toy store. At least there used to be
when I would go there with my kid. Now, if
approved by the city, this would be the first drink
and shop zone in all of California.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
What could go wrong on Bourbon Street West?
Speaker 8 (06:59):
Oh my god, exaggeration.
Speaker 4 (07:01):
Let people have fun. Have you seen what fun looks
like nowadays? What fun goes for? You know what?
Speaker 8 (07:06):
Miami has this beat so much on fun, like people
having a good time drinking till late.
Speaker 4 (07:13):
We need that in La This is a great idea.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Do we yes, we do.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
Do we not already have some element of punk public drunkenness.
Speaker 8 (07:21):
Because it's illegal, h.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
So legalize it, is what you're saying, Just like with
the weed, and now we smell weed everywhere and it's fine.
Speaker 9 (07:30):
Is it?
Speaker 3 (07:30):
Oh for some for oh you're out in yourself as Oh,
you know, I guess it's Look at the time, it's
time to go to news, isn't it. When we come back,
we're going to talk about the tariffs briefly because there's
an area of southern California that is especially nervous about
what the tariffs will bring. So we'll get into that
and more on the other side of the break. Remember
(07:52):
five thirty we have Beth Biggler coming on the renowned
Pet Grief Counselor, so make sure you stay too for that.
It's Saturdays with Tiffany right here on KFI AM six
forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 1 (08:06):
You're listening to KFI AM six forty on demand kf I.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
AM six forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app. Saturdays
with Tiffany here until seven pm. And we were just
talking about the new potential allowance of public drinking at
the Santa Monica Promenade, of which Raoul is very pro.
Oh no, if I'm pro, I kind of think it
(08:33):
might be setting us up or them, at least in
Santa Monica for some interesting interactions, especially since Palissades High
School is now positioned right there at that sears, just
a block or so away from the promenade, So you're
going to have these kids after school mixing with public drunkenness.
Speaker 4 (08:54):
Did you drink when you're in high school? I did not,
And I'm not just saying that on air. I didn't either.
I didn't.
Speaker 3 (09:01):
I waited, Kayla, did you drink when she's drinking now
I'm drunking?
Speaker 5 (09:08):
I actually wait until I was twenty one.
Speaker 4 (09:10):
Oh yeah, I wasn't allowed to drink. I did like
once in high school. Yeah yeah, but I wasn't really
allowed to drink its I was twenty one. I was
a real follower.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
Yeah, like snuck a wine cooler, you know, like but
that that was at Hollme or you know, someone brought
something to a party. I was always really afraid that
I was going to get caught, so I didn't do it.
Speaker 4 (09:27):
Raoul, No, I agree, you can't have kids drinking. But oh,
thank you. I think we are right. But let's talk
about Raoul.
Speaker 8 (09:34):
Well, no, I'm just saying nightlife is such a powerful force. Yeah,
and we fall so short on nightlife in La. Yeah,
we do, and especially at beach cities. Like where do
you go to have fun at the beach and enjoy
night life?
Speaker 4 (09:49):
You don't.
Speaker 3 (09:49):
Everything closes at like ten my point exactly, you know.
So I understand wanting this to be a revenue stream,
and it does. The promenade does need it. The city
of Santa Monica will benefit from it, especially as the
tourist season picks up. They will have to have some
pretty strict parameters. I'm thinking some high high gates to
keep all of the public drunkenness contained to the promenade.
(10:12):
People shouldn't just be wandering around. Let's say you want
to drink at home. Let's say you don't want to
go to the promenade. You want to purchase your own libations,
your own snacks, and that some of your food and
drink does not necessarily come from the Great State. And
I say that tongue in cheek of California.
Speaker 4 (10:28):
It is imported.
Speaker 3 (10:29):
It comes from somewhere else. Well, these tariffs are about
to take effect and imports are predicted to shrink drastically.
So what are people doing. Well, they're hoarding.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
Food and home products. Some say is costing more.
Speaker 7 (10:46):
Every day and ask.
Speaker 9 (10:47):
How much you spend more?
Speaker 4 (10:49):
How much did we just spend?
Speaker 7 (10:50):
You spent sixty five?
Speaker 4 (10:51):
I spend twenty two.
Speaker 10 (10:53):
We met Stacey Tahiti nine our son Edward as they
picked up a few items from this Eastville shopping center.
Speaker 7 (10:58):
Is that more or less the budget?
Speaker 3 (11:00):
No, Like, my gosh, you can't even buy anything for
sixty five dollars anymore.
Speaker 10 (11:06):
Next week, incoming cargo volume to the US from China
is expected to drop, according to the Port of Los Angeles,
as the impacts of President Trump's tariffs are forcing many
companies to scale back on their orders.
Speaker 6 (11:18):
We may not have as much selection as we are
normally used to when.
Speaker 1 (11:22):
We're looking for the goods that we like to buy.
Speaker 7 (11:24):
At the consumer level.
Speaker 10 (11:28):
Today, we took a look at prices in the Inland
Empire and found many popular items were made outside the US,
from drugs to candles and other everyday home good products.
Speaker 3 (11:38):
Well, you know, hoard hoarding is something that unfortunately We've
gotten really accustomed to COVID to now any sort of scare,
any sort of panic induces panic buying. And as you
hear right there in the Inland Empire and likely elsewhere,
is probably coming to your neighborhood soon, if it hasn't already.
Shelves are going bare because people are trying to get
(12:01):
ahead of what they perceive as being drastic price increases.
What a decrease a major decrease of inventory, I know,
I've seen it. I've definitely noticed that the shelves are
not as plentiful, and online things are a bit more expensive.
Speaker 4 (12:17):
So I don't know what to make of that, But
I am also.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
Of the fray that something is coming and I don't
know exactly how to navigate it. Uh, something that people
shouldn't have to navigate. Murder, definitely not especially in your home. Well,
in one Valley Village apartment complex, residents are furious with
the management because they say a murderer got in and
(12:43):
that there were no security precautions to prevent what happened next.
Speaker 11 (12:47):
We've been speaking to residents all day, and some of
them told is that they actually contacted authorities. They called
nine to one one the morning of April twenty third,
after they say they heard loud noises coming from a
unit inside the building while that commotion, that altercation may
have been a fight between the tenant and his attacker.
Speaker 9 (13:06):
Once he's sixteen nine website Drive.
Speaker 11 (13:08):
Apartment KTLA obtained police dispatch audio placed on Wednesday, April
twenty third, the morning of a suspected murder. A resident
inside Ashton Sherman Village apartment's contacted authorities after hearing a
loud commotion coming from the upper unit here on the
fifth floor, this apartment where fifty three year old Menashhedra
was viciously killed.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
Because the un said the.
Speaker 9 (13:32):
Pair, here's two males fighting and wrestling, sting and yelling.
Speaker 11 (13:36):
We got a closer look at the area around the
crime scene, the hallways that investigators believe the suspect cased
before the crime. You see that individual recorded on surveillance
footage going unit to unit trying the door handles, attempting
to break in.
Speaker 12 (13:50):
I found out Tuesday morning from one of my neighbors.
He said, have you heard the nine one one call yet?
And I said no, So he played it for me
and on Wednesday, the neighbor below Oh called nine one one.
I'm not sure what time it was, but he heard
two men fighting and wrestling, and when the police came,
I guess it was quiet, so they.
Speaker 11 (14:12):
Didn't go inside.
Speaker 12 (14:14):
And so the guy must have been dead for a
couple days.
Speaker 11 (14:17):
While that police dispatch audio was from April twenty third,
officers didn't find Hedraw's body until days later.
Speaker 3 (14:24):
All right, Well, that is terrible news and absolutely disconcerting
if you're expecting security in your got to be secured
apartment building, you're building your dwelling of any sort.
Speaker 4 (14:36):
And this story is continuing to unfold.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
I've seen quite a few comments from people who live
in that building saying that they saw that security footage
of the person, this suspect lurking around the building and
trying other doorknobs, looking into ways to possibly breach entrances
into other people's apartments. So that is horrible and I
hope that they can get a handle on that. That
(14:58):
mugshot picture is out if you know this suspect, because
someone does, of course, report it to authorities asap.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
God bless those people out there.
Speaker 3 (15:09):
Just want to mention that our next guest will be
coming on at five point thirty. But I want to
preface it by saying this conversation might be difficult. This
conversation involves pet loss. The loss of a pet, and
the loss of a pet is hard. It's the absolute
most difficult part about loving an animal.
Speaker 4 (15:28):
I've been there numerous.
Speaker 3 (15:30):
Times, so I just want to warn you that this
next conversation will likely touch your emotions. Pet loss is
complicated because people don't understand how deep bonds can be
with pets and when a pet passes, how deeply we
mourn them when they're gone. So we're going to talk
to a renowned pet grief counselor. Her name is Beth Bigler.
(15:52):
She has a new book out, and she's going to
talk about her book, the work that she's done, and
everything inside of pet grief. When we come back right
here on Saturdays with Tiffany, it's KFI AM six forty
live everywhere on the iHeartRadio apps.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
You're listening to KFI AM six forty on demand KFI.
Speaker 3 (16:15):
AM six forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app Saturdays
with Tiffany here until seven, and our next guess is
Beth Biggler. Losing a pet is one of the hardest
things that anyone can do. If you've ever lost a
pet had a pet pass on, then you understand just
(16:37):
how insurmountable that grief is and how complicated it can be.
Speaker 4 (16:43):
People may not understand well.
Speaker 3 (16:46):
Psychologists call this type of grief disenfranchised grief, which they
say is a result of empathy failure. People then deny
their own pet grief because a part of them feel
that it's shameful. Beth Bigler is not a denier of
her grief. When her cat, Arnie, her soulmate, Her soulmate
(17:09):
cat passed away, his physical loss turned into an emotional gain. Together,
propelled by their love and want to help others, Beth
and Arnie support people through the pain of losing a
beloved animal. Beth's book, Honoring Our Animals is a guide
to not denying the grief of mourning a pet, but
(17:30):
instead to acknowledging it and using it to still live
a full life through meditations, affirmations, and intentional practices that
honor grief as a sacred continuation of love. Please welcome
Beth Bigler, renowned pet loss grief counselor, educator and author
(17:51):
to the show Hi.
Speaker 9 (17:52):
Beth Lay Tistany. It's great to be here, and thank
you for normalizing and validating pet loss grief.
Speaker 3 (18:00):
I appreciate the work that you do, and I'm so
grateful that you are with us today to have this
conversation about why normalizing pet grief is so important and
why minimizing the grief that people feel is extremely harmful
and also really delegitimizes or illegitimizes what pet relationships can be.
(18:24):
Let's jump right into some questions that I have for you,
because I could keep you on for the entirety of
this show. I have experienced pet loss numerous times, and
I count myself as fortunate to having been through that
because that means I loved an animal, and I was
loved by an animal, just like in a marriage or
(18:45):
a longtime relationship. It's said that people eventually start to
look like their animals. And it's funny because I looked
at a picture of you and Arnie, your soul cat,
and you guys actually started to face each other physically.
Did you also share any personality traits with Arnie?
Speaker 4 (19:05):
And if so, what, well.
Speaker 9 (19:08):
That's the best compliment ever, because he is one handsome cat.
Speaker 13 (19:11):
I tell you, handsome boy, Well, you know, I love
to believe that all the gifts, guidance, lessons, and teachings
that Arnie brought into my life are living within me,
and it's part of the work I do.
Speaker 9 (19:23):
To help others. Arnie taught me a lot about self worth.
He taught me a lot about acceptance. He taught me
that even on my worst day, having a bad moment,
I was still okay in his eyes. He taught me
to be hopeful. He taught me to believe that the
world can bring me good things even when times feel
really hard, and I like to think I embody some
(19:44):
of those traits today. He bolstered everything about me that
needed bolstering, and taught me a lot about love, being loved,
accepting love, and feeling deserving of love.
Speaker 3 (19:55):
I believe that what he gave you are so selfless,
giving to your clients, to your friends, to your family,
and to people who need it. So again, thank you
for your work. You've bet You've spoken about your relationship
with Arnie on other platforms. I've watched you speak, I've
read your words, and one thing that stood out to
(20:18):
me was the concept of rest. You said that Arnie
taught you how to basically stop and be present. When
he would lay on you, he would force you to
just pause and be in the moment. How did that
message of rest of being present from Arnie guide you
once he passed?
Speaker 9 (20:39):
Well, I think so many of us struggle with always
feeling like we need to be more and do more
and take more things on. It feels like for everybody
I know, we all struggle with the concept of taking
time to slow down, be more present, be more mindful,
and be in the moment. And isn't that one of
the greatest gifts that all of our beloved companions teach us.
(21:01):
They are so in the moment. They are not ruminating
about the past, they are not future tripping about what
horrible things may come. But they are right here, right now.
And so, you know, when Arnie was Earth's side, he
definitely taught me a lot about you know, hey, take
time to rest, take time to rejuvenate, take time to restore.
I think of those times often as times that he
(21:22):
was helping me fill my cups. You know. So, now
he is not Earth'side, but of course our relationship continues,
our bond continues to evolve and expand, and I keep
that very mindful. You know, my job is hectic. I
help dozens and dozens of grievers every week, supporting them
in one on one sessions and groups and through my
Instagram community. So I'm always listening to Arnie when he
(21:45):
reminds me to take a moment, even if that's just
a moment to look up at the sun and feel
the rays on my face, or even when I'm waiting
to stop light. Sometimes I'll just close my eyes for
a moment, connecting with him, take a deep breath, and
just ground myself back to present. And I find it
really helpless with my days now as much as it
did when he was Earth's side.
Speaker 3 (22:04):
You know, I love that you speak that way about
Arnie because it's very obvious, very evident to anyone who
listens to you, that Arnie was your family. It's undeniable
that he was your family. And you use the word
guardian quite a bit when talking about pets and humans,
and we're thought to be their guardians. Are pets while
(22:25):
they're here earthside? Once they pass, does that relationship change?
Do they become our guardians?
Speaker 9 (22:33):
It's a beautiful question, you know. And these relationships with
our beloved, as I know are different person to person.
You know, some people really view their beloveds sort of
in a childlike role. You know, people say, oh, that's
my fur baby, but that's my child. And some people
really feel that other people feel that they're beloved is
a protector for them earthside as well as after their transition.
(22:57):
So I think it's a deeply personal relationship for us. Undeniably,
I do Petsa's family. They are every bit as valid
and important as human family members. And in fact, when
I'm working with people about grief awareness and advocacy, I say, hey,
you know, if you have someone in your life who's
beloved transitions, please treat it as if you would treat
a human loss. So please treat it with the same dignity,
(23:18):
respect in any of the actions you would take to
support them if it were a human loss. Because I
think part of the cultural shift I'm hoping to see
is that we do treat our family members, our animal
family members, on an equal level as human family members,
and that would certainly help support grievers as they go.
Speaker 3 (23:34):
Absolutely, And that goes right back to how I started
this segment in this conversation, with the fact that psychologists
have named this grief, that it is particulars specific, and
that it is called disenfranchised grief, which then amounts to
empathy failure. Empathy failure people not wanting to express grief
(23:55):
because they don't feel that others will understand. They feel
a shame to have love to pad and to mourn
a pet this deeply. And I'm really thankful that you
again are making this a common part of the of
the conversation of the lexicon, that this is normal. It
should be normal, because anything less than this would be
(24:15):
a huge disservice and a huge disqualifier to the love
that we feel for our pet family members.
Speaker 9 (24:23):
I really appreciate you naming it as this enfranchised grief.
That's a new term for many people. They've never heard
it before, and even naming it for grievers who are
listening right now is so impactful, because you know, until
you know there's a name for a grief that isn't
really openly acknowledged or socially mourned or publicly supported, you
sometimes might feel like you're all alone in it, and
so you're right. Grievers often feel shame about this, or
(24:46):
they start to doubt the validity of it because we
are still in a culture of oh, well, it's just
a dog, or it's only a cat, or get another one,
right right. I think that people say and our culture
did not recognize this as significant loss. And I'm really
hoping that more conversations like this can start to change that.
Speaker 3 (25:02):
Well, Beth, I'd love to continue this conversation on the
other side of the break, and I want to get
into next when we come back, what people who are
still managing the fires, the situation and the palisades in
the Pasadena Altadena area, those people who have yet to
recover their pets, what they can do to hopefully start
(25:24):
to heal. Let's continue this conversation on the other side.
Speaker 4 (25:27):
Is that okay?
Speaker 9 (25:29):
Sounds great?
Speaker 4 (25:30):
Awesome. We're talking with Beth Biggler.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
She is a renowned pet loss grief counselor, educator and
now author, and we will be getting into more questions
as well as Beth's wonderful new book entitled Honoring Our
Animals on the Other Side of the Break, So stay
right here with us on Saturdays with Tiffany. It's KFI
(25:53):
AM six forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
You're listening to KFI AM six forty KF.
Speaker 3 (26:00):
I AM six forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app.
It's Tiffany Hobbs here with you for Saturdays with Tiffany,
and we're talking to Beth Bigler and she is just
a force, an absolute force.
Speaker 4 (26:13):
She's a renowned pet loss grief.
Speaker 3 (26:15):
Counselor and educator and a new author and we're going
to get into her book, Honoring Our Animals in just
a moment. But before we do, Beth, thanks again for
being on the show. I want to welcome you back
and I want to jump right back into our question.
Speaker 4 (26:30):
So we just have seen the.
Speaker 3 (26:34):
Terrible fires that took over southern California, Altadina, Pasadena with
the Eton Fire, the Palisades Fire. Everything is still underway.
We are still absolutely in the throes of recovery and
this will go on for years. And while people and
municipalities are focusing on land and on structures and the
(26:57):
monetary aspect of fire recovery, what is getting lost is
the emotional toll of people who.
Speaker 4 (27:05):
Have yet to recover their pets.
Speaker 3 (27:08):
So many pets were rescued, thankfully, so and I know
you got Arnie from Pasadena Humane who has done amazing work,
but there are also still thousands of animals that are
yet to be accounted for, and because of that, being
in limbo, people are not necessarily able to start the
grieving process.
Speaker 4 (27:30):
What do you say to that?
Speaker 3 (27:31):
What do you say to the grieving process, which is
usually dependent on answers when there are simply no answers.
Speaker 9 (27:39):
Well, my heart goes out to everybody who's been impacted
by these fires. It's a devastating situation for guardians and
their beloved and of course the sort of situation you're right,
it goes on for a long time. There will be
a lot of ripple effect in the grief from this,
and so my heartaches for everyone who's been impacted. And
I'd like to name this that you we talk earlier
(28:00):
about the power of naming them Ambiguous loss. Ambiguous loss
is a term, and it's a term that we use
when we have a situation like this where we have
no documentation necessarily to account for the loss. So along
with ambiguous loss comes ambiguous grief. So there's actually a term,
and if any of you are experiencing this, I want
(28:21):
you to know there's a name for it. You can
read about it, you can learn more about it, to
put some support around what you're feeling. And this is
very difficult, right because we don't have quote closure, We
don't know maybe what happened. We have a lot of
unanswered questions alongside things like anger, guilt, frustration, and of
course huge sadness. So in this situation, there are a
(28:44):
lot of things to tend to. But the number one thing,
if I could gift anyone anything, would be self compassion.
Really recognize that you are going through a difficult thing,
Be kind to yourself, speak kindly to yourself, take good
care of yourself. You of course didn't not mean for
this to happen, and the situation was absolutely beyond your control.
(29:06):
And in this type of situation sometimes it's supportive to say, well,
what can I do? What can I put into my control?
So whatever feels right for you in terms of if
you are searching, if you are looking, doing what you
can in the present, but also a permission slip if
you would like to do something else, if you would
like to have a memorial, if you would like to
(29:27):
have a funeral for your beloved, that's okay too. There's
no right or wrong way to cope with this. The
thing we want to do is bring support to our
unanswered questions. And sometimes those unanswered questions can be so uncomfortable.
And it's okay to have those unanswered questions. And I
advise people, if you're struggling with unanswered questions, write them
all down, give them a place to go. Some people
(29:50):
like to write down all the unanswered questions and then
tear up the piece of paper and do a ritual
with it. Right, so giving yourself permission to wrestle with
those questions. And also this is not right for everyone,
but for some people. Perhaps you choose to believe the
story you want to believe about what happened to your
(30:10):
beloved if you don't know, there is no harm in
choosing to believe what you want to believe about the circumstances.
And it's okay to make some choices about what you
want to believe, what you want to tell yourself about
what may have happened.
Speaker 3 (30:26):
New terms ambiguous loss and ambiguous grief. Thank you for those.
Something that's not ambiguous by any stretch of the imagination
is your new book. It is very clear cut, it
is very it has very clear objectives. Congratulations on your book,
Honoring Our Animals just released April twenty second, and you
(30:49):
call it a collaboration between you and Arnie to help
people move through their grief. Each page has a daily objective.
There are three hundred and sixty five days worth of
this work to help people move through their grief. Can
you tell us where to purchase your book and also
(31:10):
any pages that might stand out to you?
Speaker 9 (31:12):
Well? Absolutely. The book is available for pre order now
on Amazon. The release date is going to be June third,
one month from today, and it's available at any bookstore
you want to go to. Go to your local bookstore,
go to bookshop dot org, or you are of course
welcome Amazon, Barnes and Noble. I wrote this book because
I've sat with hundreds and hundreds of grieving guardians and
(31:34):
I've heard what they are struggling with. And I aim
to bring all the people I work with tools, practical
things they can do, and words of comfort. So in
this book, I have three hundred and sixty five very digestible,
approachable meditations, one for every day of the year, so
you can reflect on this at some point in your day.
There's a little invitation at the end of every meditation
(31:56):
with a concrete action stuff you can do like a
ritual or fighting prompt, or way to feel more connected
to your beloved. And in these pages you'll find ways
to of course support all of your grief symptoms and
big feelings. You will find ways to feel more connected
to your beloved, and you will also find some ways
to support your own self discovery and identity. So it's
a beautiful gift for any griever in your life who's struggling,
(32:19):
and it's a beautiful gift for yourself regardless of when
your loss occurred or what the circumstances were.
Speaker 3 (32:25):
As Arnie was and continues to be a gift to you,
your beloved cat soul Cat Arnie, you are a gift
to us. Beth Biggler, thank you so very much for
coming on our show, and you can follow her on
Instagram at Honoring our Animals or by searching Beth Biggler
on Instagram. Go out get that book. It is beautiful.
(32:47):
I told my producer Kayla off Air, I'm absolutely purchasing
it for myself in anticipation of what could come in
the future, because I have pets, and you know, it's
just the way of the world and for people I
know who are going through the grieving process currently. So
Beth Bigler, thank you so very much for coming on
(33:08):
Saturdays with Tiffany. Please tell Arnie when you speak to
him next to say hi to all my pups and
my kittens on that other side.
Speaker 9 (33:15):
They couldn't have a better ambassador.
Speaker 3 (33:17):
I'll let him know you're really, really, really kind and
I appreciate you.
Speaker 4 (33:22):
Thank you, Beth and everyone.
Speaker 3 (33:24):
Make sure you go out and you pick up that
book Honoring Our Animals at all your local bookstores and
you can get it online and follow Beth again at
Honoring our Animals on Instagram and you'll find all of
the affiliate links right there. When we come back, we're
going to get into our deeper Dives segment. We're going
to look at the La County Fair, the history of
the fair, some things you don't know, the food. We
(33:46):
all love to talk about the food, and some things
you might know, and things you can anticipate in this
next fair season, which just kicked off yesterday, so weather permitting,
get out there and enjoy the fair.
Speaker 4 (33:59):
We'll talk about it. Come back.
Speaker 3 (34:00):
It's kf I Am six forty live everywhere on the
iHeartRadio app kf I
Speaker 1 (34:05):
AM six forty on demand
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