June 17, 2025 • 7 mins
Amy speaks with author Richard Simon about his latest book ‘Unplug: How to Break Up with Your Phone and Reclaim Your Life.’
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Let's say good morning now to Richard Simon, the author
of Unplug How to Break Up with your Phone and
Reclaim your Life.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Good morning Richard, Good morning Amy.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Great to be here, Great to have you. Thanks for
getting up early with this. So you wrote this book,
and I saw the press release on it, and I go, oh,
my gosh, I have to read this book. And I
will tell you that since reading it, I've noticed even
more how pervasive our phones are. Like I'll find myself
sitting on the couch just playing Solitaire and other word
games four hours at a time, and it's just this
(00:33):
time suck and then like I'll put the phone down
and then I'll get this feeling like I need to
pick it up and play another game. And I was like,
oh my gosh, why is that.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Yeah, the core piece of dopamine. Dopamine is the most powerful,
one of the most powerful molecules in the brain. And
each time you tap your phone, whether it's with Solitaire
or whether it's Internet browser or WhatsApp, whatever it might be,
it releases dopamine, which just becomes more and more pleasurable.
And the smartphone is literally a shortcut machine. And that's
(01:05):
what's going on behind the scenes in your mind.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
Okay, so the premise of the book seems pretty straightforward.
You know that it may be time to break up
with your phone. But I want to ask you kind
of what is the goal of the book, Like, what
gave you the idea to write it?
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Sure, and I'll started with me. I was sick of
my smartphone taking up hours of my day. The average
American adult spends more than five hours of dating on
their smartphones. We don't get that time back, and as
a father to young kids, in twenty nineteen, I realized this.
I had enough. So in twenty twenty, I turned my
smartphone off for an entire year, and it was one
(01:42):
of the most transformative moments of my life. And what
I realized is that look at all the various self
help articles and books everyone is espousing hacks noble as
they might be, but deleting social media, putting a rubber
band around your phone, digital stabbus, all these things are great,
but for something as addictive as a phone, as you
are just talking about it doesn't go far enough. So
(02:03):
I end up interviewing dozens of people over the course
of the last couple of years and found that the
first step to establishing a more effective relationship with your
smartphone is to turn it off.
Speaker 1 (02:12):
Okay, so turn off completely. So no GPS, no texting,
no social media, just done.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Yeah. So, there are four different styles that outline the
book in terms of turning it off. The most popular
one I think that will resonate for your listeners is
to switch to a basic phone. And when I say
basic phone, I mean basic like calling and texting. There
are some like Kosher phones or wise phones that have
more features. For the sake of recalibrating the reward pathways
(02:42):
in your brain, I highly recommend switching over to a
basic phone. You can have your same phone number, you
can switch over the simcard at your local AT and
T Verizon, your T Mobile story. And by doing that,
by switching over to a basic phone, you're going to
regain the most precious resource source in life, which is time.
You're gonna get hours back because you're not gonna want
to text on this terrible device because it takes forever
(03:04):
the text and it'll completely reset you. So one of
the four breakup styles are recommend is switching to a
basic som.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
Okay, So then Richard also tell me like you said
that one of the things you noticed when I was
reading your book, you said you you and your wife
would come sit down on your couch at night and
you wouldn't talk to each other because you just stick
your noses in your phones and you're doing your own thing.
How did that immediately change when you turned your phone off.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
Yeah, my wife, and she's a doctor, she's a physician.
She's very very busy in terms of her hours. And
what would end up happening is during the day. I'm
sure many other married couples who are listening go through this.
You text each other throughout the day, spouses, and there's
dozens of texts that are happening. You know, this is happening,
This is happening. What do you think of this? How
about this for dinner? This? And before you know it,
(03:51):
you get back home and you're already caught up when
everything had happened during the day, there's nothing to catch
up on, and all of a sudden, you know, we
stopped this texting throughout the day and we actual like
sit down and have dinner at the family and like,
I'm genuinely curious about what happened during the day, And
same for her in terms of what happened for my day.
It completely reset our relationship and it grew tremendously since
(04:12):
I went to this process and with the dozens of
people I interviewed in the book and in my profile,
it was the same. Relationships with family just improved so much.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
Yeah, and well, we hear a lot about how like
kids who have grown up, they've had smartphones since, you know,
since they were very young, that they don't communicate as well,
they don't have those same communication skills because, like you said,
they text and do short little blurbs as opposed to
having full on conversations like we used to when we
were growing up. So I could I can see that correlation.
(04:43):
If somebody wants to dip their toe in, is there
a way to dip their toe in?
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Yeah, I mean for starters, go for a walk. Go
for a walk around the neighborhood for forty five minutes
an hour, and don't bring your phone. You're going to
be going crazy inside the first time you do it.
This is how addictive a smartphone is. But go for
a walk for forty five minutes to an hour and
do it by yourself for the first time. Don't bring
someone else and just have to embrace your own thoughts.
(05:10):
That's a smartphone has done is that we are no
longer able to embrace solitude, We're no longer able to
truly think. So that's the first step I would do,
And after you do it a few times, you're going
to realize this is really really nice. Start doing it
when you go out to dinner with friends, leave your
phone at home. The first time you're in the car.
You might be completely freaking out. That's the withdrawal, it's
(05:30):
completely natural. Then you're going to realize how special that is.
So before you go through any sort of detox in
terms of turning your phone off, I have a whole
section in my book about preparation. I think those were
some of the initial things you can do to start
to realize that, okay, I can do this.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
Okay. And another example that you gave Richard that I
absolutely loved was you said after you turned your phone
off or you left it behind. I'm not sure if
it was before you or after you actually turned the
smartphone off. As you said, you went to the grocery
store and you were standing in line and you just
had to stand there because you didn't have a phone
to check and how weird that feeling is because we're
(06:06):
so used to be being connected all the time.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Yeah, it's so true. Yeah, the first day of my detox, Yeah,
I was at the grocery store and yeah, even just
for three four minutes, I could only scan the tabloids
for so long around me, and I'm literally freaking out inside.
And I'm literally standing in line at a grocery store.
You'd figure, Okay, you can deal with it for three
or four minutes, but I was not comfortable enough being
(06:33):
in my own skin. Now, looking back when it's five
years later, I mean, I don't go to the grocery
store with a smartphone ever. So now I'm totally comfortable
with it. So this whole process to talk about in
the book, it really will recalibrate the low word pathways
in your brain.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
Okay, Richard Simon, The book is Unplugged, How to break
up with your Phone and Reclaim your Life. I wish
we had more time to talk because this is so
interesting and it really opened my eyes to how much
we spend time on our phones and don't spend our
time living our lives. Where can we get the.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
Book, Richard, I'm Plugged if be found at all major booksellers, Amazon, Targets,
Barnes and Noble, Walmart, your local independent bookstore wherever books
are sold.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
All right, thank you so much, Richard Simon. Again, the
book is Unplugged, How to break up with your Phone
and reclaim your life. It's a quick read, and it's
really a good read. Richard, appreciate it. Have a great day.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
Thanks so much. Aming you too.
Let's say good morning now to Richard Simon, the author
of Unplug How to Break Up with your Phone and
Reclaim your Life.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Good morning Richard, Good morning Amy.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Great to be here, Great to have you. Thanks for
getting up early with this. So you wrote this book,
and I saw the press release on it, and I go, oh,
my gosh, I have to read this book. And I
will tell you that since reading it, I've noticed even
more how pervasive our phones are. Like I'll find myself
sitting on the couch just playing Solitaire and other word
games four hours at a time, and it's just this
(00:33):
time suck and then like I'll put the phone down
and then I'll get this feeling like I need to
pick it up and play another game. And I was like,
oh my gosh, why is that.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Yeah, the core piece of dopamine. Dopamine is the most powerful,
one of the most powerful molecules in the brain. And
each time you tap your phone, whether it's with Solitaire
or whether it's Internet browser or WhatsApp, whatever it might be,
it releases dopamine, which just becomes more and more pleasurable.
And the smartphone is literally a shortcut machine. And that's
(01:05):
what's going on behind the scenes in your mind.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
Okay, so the premise of the book seems pretty straightforward.
You know that it may be time to break up
with your phone. But I want to ask you kind
of what is the goal of the book, Like, what
gave you the idea to write it?
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Sure, and I'll started with me. I was sick of
my smartphone taking up hours of my day. The average
American adult spends more than five hours of dating on
their smartphones. We don't get that time back, and as
a father to young kids, in twenty nineteen, I realized this.
I had enough. So in twenty twenty, I turned my
smartphone off for an entire year, and it was one
(01:42):
of the most transformative moments of my life. And what
I realized is that look at all the various self
help articles and books everyone is espousing hacks noble as
they might be, but deleting social media, putting a rubber
band around your phone, digital stabbus, all these things are great,
but for something as addictive as a phone, as you
are just talking about it doesn't go far enough. So
(02:03):
I end up interviewing dozens of people over the course
of the last couple of years and found that the
first step to establishing a more effective relationship with your
smartphone is to turn it off.
Speaker 1 (02:12):
Okay, so turn off completely. So no GPS, no texting,
no social media, just done.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Yeah. So, there are four different styles that outline the
book in terms of turning it off. The most popular
one I think that will resonate for your listeners is
to switch to a basic phone. And when I say
basic phone, I mean basic like calling and texting. There
are some like Kosher phones or wise phones that have
more features. For the sake of recalibrating the reward pathways
(02:42):
in your brain, I highly recommend switching over to a
basic phone. You can have your same phone number, you
can switch over the simcard at your local AT and
T Verizon, your T Mobile story. And by doing that,
by switching over to a basic phone, you're going to
regain the most precious resource source in life, which is time.
You're gonna get hours back because you're not gonna want
to text on this terrible device because it takes forever
(03:04):
the text and it'll completely reset you. So one of
the four breakup styles are recommend is switching to a
basic som.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
Okay, So then Richard also tell me like you said
that one of the things you noticed when I was
reading your book, you said you you and your wife
would come sit down on your couch at night and
you wouldn't talk to each other because you just stick
your noses in your phones and you're doing your own thing.
How did that immediately change when you turned your phone off.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
Yeah, my wife, and she's a doctor, she's a physician.
She's very very busy in terms of her hours. And
what would end up happening is during the day. I'm
sure many other married couples who are listening go through this.
You text each other throughout the day, spouses, and there's
dozens of texts that are happening. You know, this is happening,
This is happening. What do you think of this? How
about this for dinner? This? And before you know it,
(03:51):
you get back home and you're already caught up when
everything had happened during the day, there's nothing to catch
up on, and all of a sudden, you know, we
stopped this texting throughout the day and we actual like
sit down and have dinner at the family and like,
I'm genuinely curious about what happened during the day, And
same for her in terms of what happened for my day.
It completely reset our relationship and it grew tremendously since
(04:12):
I went to this process and with the dozens of
people I interviewed in the book and in my profile,
it was the same. Relationships with family just improved so much.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
Yeah, and well, we hear a lot about how like
kids who have grown up, they've had smartphones since, you know,
since they were very young, that they don't communicate as well,
they don't have those same communication skills because, like you said,
they text and do short little blurbs as opposed to
having full on conversations like we used to when we
were growing up. So I could I can see that correlation.
(04:43):
If somebody wants to dip their toe in, is there
a way to dip their toe in?
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Yeah, I mean for starters, go for a walk. Go
for a walk around the neighborhood for forty five minutes
an hour, and don't bring your phone. You're going to
be going crazy inside the first time you do it.
This is how addictive a smartphone is. But go for
a walk for forty five minutes to an hour and
do it by yourself for the first time. Don't bring
someone else and just have to embrace your own thoughts.
(05:10):
That's a smartphone has done is that we are no
longer able to embrace solitude, We're no longer able to
truly think. So that's the first step I would do,
And after you do it a few times, you're going
to realize this is really really nice. Start doing it
when you go out to dinner with friends, leave your
phone at home. The first time you're in the car.
You might be completely freaking out. That's the withdrawal, it's
(05:30):
completely natural. Then you're going to realize how special that is.
So before you go through any sort of detox in
terms of turning your phone off, I have a whole
section in my book about preparation. I think those were
some of the initial things you can do to start
to realize that, okay, I can do this.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
Okay. And another example that you gave Richard that I
absolutely loved was you said after you turned your phone
off or you left it behind. I'm not sure if
it was before you or after you actually turned the
smartphone off. As you said, you went to the grocery
store and you were standing in line and you just
had to stand there because you didn't have a phone
to check and how weird that feeling is because we're
(06:06):
so used to be being connected all the time.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Yeah, it's so true. Yeah, the first day of my detox, Yeah,
I was at the grocery store and yeah, even just
for three four minutes, I could only scan the tabloids
for so long around me, and I'm literally freaking out inside.
And I'm literally standing in line at a grocery store.
You'd figure, Okay, you can deal with it for three
or four minutes, but I was not comfortable enough being
(06:33):
in my own skin. Now, looking back when it's five
years later, I mean, I don't go to the grocery
store with a smartphone ever. So now I'm totally comfortable
with it. So this whole process to talk about in
the book, it really will recalibrate the low word pathways
in your brain.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
Okay, Richard Simon, The book is Unplugged, How to break
up with your Phone and Reclaim your Life. I wish
we had more time to talk because this is so
interesting and it really opened my eyes to how much
we spend time on our phones and don't spend our
time living our lives. Where can we get the.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
Book, Richard, I'm Plugged if be found at all major booksellers, Amazon, Targets,
Barnes and Noble, Walmart, your local independent bookstore wherever books
are sold.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
All right, thank you so much, Richard Simon. Again, the
book is Unplugged, How to break up with your Phone
and reclaim your life. It's a quick read, and it's
really a good read. Richard, appreciate it. Have a great day.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
Thanks so much. Aming you too.
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