November 11, 2025 • 31 mins
Alex Stone reports that travel pain is deepening as the FAA increases flight reductions from 4% to 6% amid the ongoing government shutdown. The agency plans to reach 10% soon, and more than 1,500 flights have already been canceled. Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy warns that even after the shutdown ends, it will take time to get operations back to normal — with Thanksgiving travel fast approaching.
Jay Leno joins the show to promote his December 10th appearance with Tim Conway Jr. at Cadillac of Pasadena, sharing a funny story about Warren Buffett calling him about a mattress commercial. Jay and Tim trade laughs about the upcoming event, Norm MacDonald’s comedy brilliance, and gambling and golf tales. Conway wraps the hour by honoring veterans and sharing that he proudly served in the Army.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's KMF.
Speaker 2 (00:00):
I am six forty and you're listening to the Conway
Show on demand on the iHeartRadio app. We've got great,
great guests coming in today, a guy who used to
host the Tonight Show. Maybe you could probably guess who
that is. Jay Leno's coming in shortly, so that's cool.
(00:23):
But let's start with the very, very popular and hardworking
Alex Stone with ABC.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
Dudes, Hi, you bob oh.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
Compared to Jay Leno, I've been seeing all those commercials
where he's telling me how amazing the new Lexus is.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
Oh yeah, yes, yes, yes, we're doing a thing in
December at Pasadena Cadillac. I guess Cadillac's got a new
car out as well. You know, do you have electric
or you were old school like me?
Speaker 1 (00:46):
Again, So I've got a GMC.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
I put gas in there.
Speaker 1 (00:50):
Yeah, I love the smell of that. You know, I'm
letting gas. Such a kid.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
I used to love the smell of it. I know
I'd killed brain cells doing that, but oh I did
stool like where would it. The more exhausted would come
out and it'd be cold in the morning. You'd smell
that against It's like rubbers cemented weirdly smelled good.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
I know.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
It's one of the nice things about when I was younger,
and we're about the same age, when you went to
the airport, that jet fuel smell was awesome.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
We're like, why do I like this? But it's great.
That's good. Wakes up in the morning, the jet fuel action.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Speaking of airports, a lot of cancelation ton Yeah, around.
Speaker 3 (01:22):
Eighteen hundred today, and the numbers went up because they
went from four percent, which they implemented last week and
then we all know about and then today they went
up to six percent on their way to ten percent,
even though today Sean Duffy said they hope they don't
have to go to ten percent, that they're only going
to go up if they feel like that they've got
to based on the staffing of air traffic controllers. Bit
(01:43):
of good news in that today, according to the Transportation Department,
the number of air traffic controllers all of a sudden skyrocketed.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
The people showing up to.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Work now coincidence, Well, Duffy is saying, well, this is
because they see light at the end of the tunnel
and all of that, and think you could argue it's
the President also saying he's going to penalize them if
they don't show up, and that those who do will
get full pay out of ten thousand dollars bonus, And
that might have something to do with it.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
Well, but how doff you put it to day in Chicon.
Speaker 2 (02:12):
Your traffic controllers are seen in the end to the
shutdown and feel more hopeful, and.
Speaker 1 (02:18):
They're coming in to their facilities. So we're grateful to
them for all that they're doing.
Speaker 3 (02:22):
So maybe it's a bit of feeling more hopeful and
a bit of Oh, the President may actually doc us
pay if we don't come in. But he says if
they do get a deal done, or when they do
within twenty four to forty eight hours of the government reopening,
that they're going to get seventy percent of their back pay.
So there's a real chance by the end of this week,
if they speed this thing through tomorrow, that by like Friday,
(02:44):
these air traffic controllers and TSA and everybody else who
have got all of these weeks without getting paid, that
they may all of a sudden direct deposit. They may
have a bunch of money for the last month in
their bank account.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Oh that's great, that's fantastic.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
Hey, you know, when you and I were first starting out,
the guy who owned the company and the senior employees
always had the power in the company. You know, you're
always afraid of pissing off the guy that owned the
company or the president of the company at whatever. But
now it's the people who walk in off the street.
They have all the power. Like all the kids who
work here at iHeart, they have all the power because
(03:18):
they can go to HR and tell HR anything about
any of us, and then all of a sudden there's
an investigation.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
It sounds about it, right.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
But the air traffic controllers, that's a new found tremendous
power in this country.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
They're very powerful. They can shut down the United States.
Speaker 3 (03:35):
And they got credit for in the last shutdown for
ending that one because when air traffic got messed up
in that one pretty quickly then everybody said, well, let's
put an end to this thing, and it was over
and done. Now that they haven't had that much power,
at least in that respect in this one, because air
traffic has not been doing great and that didn't end
it right away. But you're right, and because they have
(03:56):
the ability, it is written into contracts and other things
that they can take this time off and not get
docked for it and not actually even in some cases
they're not taking sick time when they're away during a
government shutdown, but they're still going to get paid. And
look that the president can threaten all kinds of things,
but it is written into law that they're going to
get their back pay. And he actually signed that law
(04:18):
in twenty nineteen, so it'd be going against his own law.
They're going to get their back pay no matter what
rhetoric is out there. So they'll get that money. And
they know that, and so they do have the ability
to put a lot of pressure on the government and
on the American public to get angry enough to force
their lawmakers to come to a deal by making sure
(04:38):
that they're not there.
Speaker 1 (04:39):
And then so the air traffic control system doesn't run smoothly.
But they're a critical part.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
They should never be allowed to call out sick or
take any kind of work action. It paralyzes the entire country.
Speaker 3 (04:50):
Well, you could also argue maybe they should, like FBI
agents and others, be written into where they get paid
during a government shutdown no matter what. Then we only
enough to deal with it. Yea, they get paid at
that time, and that's gonna be a big chunk of
money that they get. You know, they're gonna wake up,
you know, on Friday or Monday with a big, huge deposit. Yeah,
seventy percent of their back pay and then eventually the
rest will come and then they're they're current pay as well.
(05:12):
So that's gonna be for six seven weeks. That's a
fair amount of pay that they've been dealing without. Now
a lot of that will just go to whatever bills
they've been putting off for many of them, But that's
gonna be a lot of money.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
But we did a story yesterday that it takes three
years of heavy training. Most of them go to Oklahoma
and takes three years of heavy training in order to
become an air traffic controller.
Speaker 3 (05:34):
Yeah, it's a long time. They've got an academy, just
like going to a police academy or a fire academy,
and they go through and a lot of them get
weeded out during this because you want them to whether
it be the psychological reasons, you want them to be
totally locked in on what they're doing. They're training itself,
the stress of it, not somebody who's going to freak
out when they're under stress and things are getting bad
(05:55):
and weather's bad. That it's it's tough to become an
air traffic controller. And the average pay I think when
we've looked it up, is like one hundred and forty
four thousand or so for all of what they go
through to get to that spot. The pay is not
that great. Yeah, it's good for a government job. But
to think of how much of their life they give
up and the training that they go through, and that
your life is in their hands every time you get
(06:16):
on a on an airplane, that they're not getting paid
a ton.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
Yeah, and it's a very stressful job for one hundred
and forty four thousand dollars a year.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
Oh, absolutely, A lot of lives are in their hands.
Speaker 4 (06:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
I mean they could go to the racetrack and you know,
if they if they're a good handicapper, they can make
that in you know, two months.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
And not kill anybody in it. That's right, That's exactly right.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
Funny.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
I appreciate you coming on. I we'll speak you soon.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
Ding Dong with you, digs along with you, doll Stone,
everybody with ABC News. Lucas walked in, Jay Leno, how
you Bob, Hey, let's turn your mic on. There he
goes that Jay Leno is with us. Jay, how you, Bob?
Speaker 1 (06:53):
I'm fine? Hey, no you sound great man? Why thank you?
Speaker 4 (06:56):
Thank you?
Speaker 1 (06:56):
I'm you come in? Is that talking like that? Price
picks unbelievable?
Speaker 2 (07:01):
As Jay walked in, we saw commercial for Yama Va
when you're doing the Yama Yamava giveaway.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
I got one Thursday night we're giving away. What's that?
I think that's Alexis Alexis. Yeah, it's really cool.
Speaker 5 (07:12):
We get to pick cars people actually want, you know,
a lot of times they give away cars and it's
you know, the fleet cars from the rental rental car
that you know, but but these are actually do what
do you people want?
Speaker 1 (07:23):
Rolls races?
Speaker 2 (07:24):
They want you know, right, what's your favorite car on
a daily basis?
Speaker 1 (07:28):
To drive around it? My favorite car? Your favorite causes?
Speaker 5 (07:32):
Well, I drive my Model te around a lot because
nobody can steal it. And okay, yeah, and it's a.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Lot of fake you know, we can see it because
they don't know how to drive it.
Speaker 5 (07:38):
I don't know how to drive it, canon can don't
know how to start it, and it has no break
so you can't stop so that's great.
Speaker 2 (07:43):
What was the really loud jet engine car that you
you turned on for us when we were there?
Speaker 1 (07:48):
That was a loud jet engine car? Exactly?
Speaker 5 (07:50):
That's right, Like, well, you're becoming quite the automotive whizz.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
Is that a jet engine on the car? It is
a get engine? Wow, that's right. I've got a few.
I got a jet engine motorcycle as well, so that's
kind of fun.
Speaker 2 (08:02):
I saw a TV show that you're doing. I think
it was Jay Leno's garage. Were you out there testing cars?
And I think you were going over two hundred miles
an hour in a car. What's the fastest you've ever
gone in to the car?
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Two seventy eight? Wow? Is that right?
Speaker 5 (08:15):
And the American Eagle and the New York Dry like
so that was a lot of fun. But there's nothing
to hit, so you don't really think you're going that fast.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
But when you're that low to the ground going two
hundred and seventy eight miles an hour, it must seem
like you're going ten thousand miles an hour.
Speaker 5 (08:28):
No, it seems like you're going two seven night. Ten
thousand miles an hour feels.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Like like when you're driving a go cart. Remember when
you were a kid and my neighbor would have a
go cart and you were buzzing around thirty miles an hour.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
That seemed really fast. Well it does, yeah, because the
wheels are small. Were you always a car guy even
when you were a kid. Yeah, I mean I grew
up in New England.
Speaker 5 (08:47):
There was always broken snowboll wheels or lawnmowers or something
to fix or play with, so yeah, yeah, I enjoyed it.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
Yeah, Now, you were not an automotive kid.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
I was not an automotive guy. You were at the track,
that's right. Yeah, I was at the race track trying
to make enough money to buy myself an automotive.
Speaker 5 (09:03):
Well that's a wonderful story, automobile. That's one of those
stories they tell the young people.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
I was handy though, electronically, like I was the first
kid that I know that I took apart my remote
for the front gate for our house and I put
it in the dashboard and then had an exterior switch
where I just turned on and off, where I could
open the gate with a switch, and that was pretty
impressive for chicks.
Speaker 5 (09:25):
Yeah, the problem was you had to be in the
car to open the gate. If you walk up to
the gate.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Excuse me, I gotta get I gotta get ma. Where's
the car gate? The car's lock. I want to open
the gate to show Susan. I noticed that. And I
missed these.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
And I know that you've you know, I don't know
if you miss them or not. But the cigarette lighter
was a big part of my life. They're gone, Yes,
the cigarette lighter.
Speaker 5 (09:46):
How sadly, as a child, I can imagine how that
would have been a huge thing.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
That's a big deal. Well that was called a power plug. Right,
it's the same thing. You could pretend it's a cigarette.
Speaker 6 (09:55):
Right.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
And well, I'll tell you something.
Speaker 5 (09:57):
I had a Kaiser Nash which had the best dumbest accessory.
It had a It wasn't sold by cars, it was
after market the dealer. It's a box and it plugs
into the cigarette lighter and you fill it with cigarettes,
all right, And as you're driving, you press a button.
The cigarette rolls down.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Oh that's great.
Speaker 5 (10:18):
The thing comes out, lights it and he's the best part.
It flicks it up in the air and you catch it.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
Oh that's and in the end you see the guy
and the woman's.
Speaker 5 (10:27):
Like ooh, ooh, how sophisticated. Yeah, they don't show you
the cigarette. Oh you're dropping and burns the car to
the ground.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Right, It's like, you know the woman that used to
have the hole in her throat saying, you know, don't smoke.
That backfired on them because that woman lived thirty eight
years with that hole in her throat.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Well there you go. She's like ninety eight when she died.
I think that's an inspirational story, you know.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
But I was always jealous of her that she could
have two cigarettes at once, one in their mouth and
one of her throat.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
I think you inhale them blow out with the other.
So he got up.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
She had a blowhole, right, a smoking blowhole. Ah, rights,
we got we got a big announcement.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
We come back.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
We're doing a show together. That's right, that's right. Sadly
show how far my career is at Pasadena Cadillac.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
Yeah, that'll be fun. That'll be good times.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
Are there entering F one racing? You know, I know
you're a big racing I'm a big F one guy.
It's gonna be Las Vegas. But the F means something
totally different.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
Oh yeah, years the F one. That's right, all right?
Speaker 4 (11:21):
Jay, letters, whether you're listening to Tim Conway Junior on
demand from k f I A M six forty.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
Jay Leton, nice to see you, man, You're good to see.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
When we took a tour of your garage. You're a
very nice John. What's John's last name?
Speaker 1 (11:37):
John Parrah?
Speaker 2 (11:38):
John Parrah. What a sweet man that is who gave
us a tour? And you've been lifelong friends with him?
Or since you've been out here you've been friends with him?
Speaker 5 (11:44):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (11:44):
Yeah, very loyal to your friends. Yeah, exactly exactly. That's
why I'm here.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
That's exactly right, I think on such bigger show, that's
exactly right. We were. We took the tour of your garage.
Oh you're on TV now too with Yamava. That must
have taken all day to shoot all those different angles.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
No, it took really half hour. I work very quickly.
Did they shoot it at did they come to you
or you went to that came to the garage? Boom
bang it out here? And what are you giving away
a Lexus this time? It's I think let lexis is standing.
We have a super come up? Another guard, you know
my favorite one.
Speaker 5 (12:18):
We gave away a rolls Rice. Wow, this is unbelievable
and this is absolutely true. The guy that wins twenty
two year old security guard from China, been here eight
months okay from the excitement point of view, probably the
worst guy to.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
Win the money. He wins a million dollars. Thank you,
I mean American thank you. Okay. So he goes like,
are you happy about about the rolls?
Speaker 4 (12:44):
Rice?
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Yes?
Speaker 5 (12:45):
Yes, very beautiful car. Okay, Well thank you think and
that this this hand to God, this is true. I
give him the keys to the rolls.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
Rice.
Speaker 5 (12:55):
He walks fifteen feet to the slot machine, holds the handle,
and wins one minut kidding? Is that a security guard
from Wow?
Speaker 1 (13:05):
From China?
Speaker 5 (13:06):
He's there in a visa Wow, and we went rolls
Royce and a million dollars.
Speaker 1 (13:11):
Welcome to America.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Yeah. Now he writes everybody a letter back in China
and goes, hey, you got to get here, you gotta
go here.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Let's see what they do. Believe I'm real, but isn't
that unbelievable.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
We did a we were having a giveaway that we
did for ri em Mattress and they're like six or
seven thousand dollars beds, and we did a remote in Burbank,
and we said, we're going to give away one of
these seven thousand dollars beds. So if you show up,
somebody's gonna win. So two hundred people show up. They
wait around for the whole broadcast, and then we pick
(13:43):
out one person's name. You know, Dale Hennings is Dale Hennings. Here,
anybody Dale Headings, going once, going twice. He's way in
the back of the store buying a mattress and now
he just won one. And that's the only one with
that he sold all day. Is the giveaway, Yo, The
only guy with the credit card buying a mattress just
won the free one.
Speaker 5 (14:04):
I got a mattress story for you, all right. I'm
sitting in my office, trick. I get a call from
Warren Buffett. Okay, he goes, Jay, Hey, he goes. A
friend of mine owns a mattress store in Omaha. He
wants me to be in a commercial.
Speaker 1 (14:15):
I said, I do. I don't know what to do.
Speaker 5 (14:17):
I'm not comfortable. I don't want to talk about I said.
I said, Warren, here's what to do. You go in
the lie down on the bed, just lie down in
bed and go to sleep, and someone will come in
and say, is that Warren Buffett sleeping on that? And
the owner of the store will say, oh, yes, he
comes there every day to sleep because our mattress is
so comfortable.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
So I get a call from more the next day, genius,
thank you very much. Oh yeah, because he was so
he didn't want to he didn't want to be nervous.
Speaker 5 (14:44):
But that's a good match, you know. But it was
felt he just pretended to be asleep. Warman comes in,
Is that my Warren Buffet sleeping there?
Speaker 1 (14:50):
He comes there every day to sleep. Yeah, yeah, that's
a great idea. Yeah, that's fantastic.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
All right, we're doing a special together, a special broadcast Belly.
That's December tenth at four pm, I believe, is that right? Yes,
all right, and it's going to be a cast uh
Pasadena Cadillac Cadillac Capacading Cadillac of Pasadena, and they have
a brand new car out.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
I don't remember the name of the I think.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
It's called a Cadillac. Yes, a Cadillac. You know, my
dad was a big Cadillac guy, did your was your
dad a Cadillac?
Speaker 5 (15:20):
Well, the first thing I did when I made money,
I bought my dad a Cadillac, and not just any Cadillac,
the Italian Cadillac Wow white with red vlora Polster.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
This was the most garish. And my mother was My
mother was from Scotland. She was so oh, Jimmy, Jimmy,
your father that Cadillac.
Speaker 5 (15:38):
Like if when we would go for a ride, I'd
sit in the bag, my mother and father be in
the front. We pulled up to a light, people would
look at the Cadillac and my mother made all down
the window, we're not really Cadillac people.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Our son got us and then my we're driving a
Cadillac carse for Cadillac, and they would start fighting and
the people would take off. Oh it was oh, hilarious, hilarious.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
My my dad I bought a Seville or a Coupe
Deville back in the late seventies and he bought it
from a dealership. I don't want to say the name
of the dealership, but it's in the Van Eys area.
I'm sure you know which one it is. And he
drives it home in the middle of July and the
heater is on. The heater won't go off, and so
he gets home, he sweating his ass off, and he
(16:19):
takes it back to him and says, hey, the heater's on.
And they say, oh, sorry, mister Kahn, we will take
care of that. It was in the shop for a week.
He picks it up, drives it home. The heater's on again.
The heater is on in the middle of now at
the beginning of August, takes it back. At third time,
the heater's on. Oh, we'll give you a loaner here
it is. Third time he gets it home, the heat's
not on. We go out after church on a Sunday,
(16:41):
goes to turn the air conditioning on.
Speaker 1 (16:43):
It's broken. Then the heater comes on.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
So he takes it to the dealership and he pulls
it right up to one of their twenty foot glass
windows and he puts the bumper on the window, then
inches forward and the whole window shaows and he gives
them the keys. He goes, hey, fellas the heaters And
that was really out of character of my dad, but
(17:06):
he was, you know, he paid a lot of money
for the car.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
That heat it was on. There you go, there, they'll
do it.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
But I tell you, Cadillac, over the last like ten
or fifteen years, the way they've put together these cars.
It almost seems like a high end import, you know.
Speaker 4 (17:21):
Like you know what it is.
Speaker 5 (17:22):
It's the great The best thing that had happened to
Detroit was going bankrupt, was that right? Because they got
rid of all the ad guys and the guys that
came from Whirlpool or may Tag to sell cars, and
they brought in engineers. Yeah right, yeah exactly. And now
you have engineer. Now you have Cadillac entering F one racing.
This is the highest, most expensive, most scientific, expensive kind
(17:45):
of racing in the world, and Cadillac is right in
there with Ferrari and all these les.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
So it's going to be exciting. I mean, American engineers
are now kind of the I envy the world, I think.
Speaker 5 (17:56):
So the fact that we can produce a car like
a Corvette for eighty thousand dollars in a union shop,
it's incredible and everybody gets full benefits and the Chinese
paying two bolls an hour can barely match it.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
Yeah, it is great. So the F one, the Cadillac
seuing is are gonna have the Valure seats?
Speaker 1 (18:12):
No, I won't have the vlor seats? No they Okay,
can you stay with us? All right? Jay, Leno's with us.
Speaker 4 (18:18):
Everybody, you're listening to Tim Conway Junior on demand from
KFI AM six forty.
Speaker 2 (18:26):
It is the Conway Show. Jay Leno is with us,
and I always nice to see you, young man. Well,
thank you, thank you, and you look great, well, thank you,
thank you.
Speaker 1 (18:34):
I'm trying to get money hits.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
Oh here you and you had a great joke that
after you got burned in your garage and you paid
for a new face, you would tell people you are
the new face of common.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
That's right. I have the new face, that's right. And
I was two faced as well. That's right. Jay and
I are doing.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
We're out at the Cadillac of Pasadena on December tenth,
and that's before seven pm.
Speaker 5 (19:01):
And Tim will be talking on the scientific validity of
the fuel injection system and he's going to go over
that for the crowd.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
You know, maybe we can do is we'll get some
car parts out there and see if I can identify him.
Speaker 1 (19:13):
Yeah, but what they do. I don't think you've got
to identify the car. Richard Pryor was he around when
you started?
Speaker 5 (19:21):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (19:21):
Very much so.
Speaker 5 (19:22):
I like Richard, great comic, really the most naturally funny guy.
I mean he would just slay the room just to
kill me, just you know.
Speaker 1 (19:31):
Yeah, he was.
Speaker 5 (19:32):
He was just the best, just the best, really funny,
great facial expressions too. Yeah, And it's funny because you know,
a lot of young comics don't really know his work
because he just did Live at the Sunset Trip. He
was like the first comics to shoot a stand up
special that aired in theaters, you know, and so that
was a big deal. The HBO thing was sort of
new at the time, so he hadn't done this. So
(19:54):
there's not a lot of his work out there, but
just hilarious. That's like, you can't repeat most of it,
but it's pretty funny.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
I always thought that Jeff Altman was great. Whatever happened
to him, Jeff I had a who long time. Jeff's
a very funny guy. I know, he moved back east,
he got married.
Speaker 5 (20:10):
Yeah, he was like, you know, all comics are screwed
up in some way, and Jeff certainly takes the title.
I don't mean that insulting way. I just mean because
it's what made him funny. He just got odd, bouncing
off the wall, you know, just very hyper. You know,
was Norm MacDonald out here or did he start back east?
Was he an East Coast comic? Well he's from Canada, okay, Norma,
(20:33):
was you know, really funny? Nobody made me laugh like
norm I remember he used to bring his mom to
see me because I work clean because his mom didn't
like to go to the comedy clubs everybody worked, did
he go?
Speaker 1 (20:44):
So I had a good relationship with him.
Speaker 5 (20:46):
So he takes his mom TOV and he loved to gamble, right,
that was his So so the stand line to check
in at the hotel and it's like maybe twenty people
in front of him. So Norma says, I'm going to
go over the tables a few minutes a wile. Okay,
because on the table loses all his money. He can't
even check in the hotel. Now he lost everything. Everything
(21:09):
on his credit card he lost. He comes back to
his mic.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
We can't say my kind of guy. Yeah, there you go,
my kind of guy.
Speaker 5 (21:18):
Well, here's a gambling joke. Guys walking down the strip
in Vegas. He's right at the end of the strip,
you know where they have that sign welcome lovely. He
sees the guy coming from the desert. You know what's
that The guy crosses the street. So he crosses the
street and then guy's coming through me. He crossed and
the other guy guy crossing, so it's inevitable he's gonna
(21:40):
bump to this guy. And the guy sees him trying
to avoid him because look Sarah, so please don't avoid me.
I'm a very successful businessman where I come from. This
suit this costs thousands of dollars. It's very expensive. I
just had to run of bed, like my car broke
down on the outside.
Speaker 1 (21:54):
Of town, or were sitting in the car. I'm walking
in here.
Speaker 5 (21:57):
I'm a successful businessman where I come from, and I'm
ashamed of myself.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Can you lend me one hundred dollars?
Speaker 5 (22:04):
The guy says, well, if i'd lend you a hundred dollars,
I don't know you won't use it for gambling money.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
I reduce poly takes a bottle water bills. Oh, I
got gambling money. No, I got gambling money. I'm okay.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
And somewhat true. Right, yeah, guys, will you know wait
until the end like we used to. I remember I
was at Mandalay Bay and I was gambling, probably spending
twenty five dollars a hand in blackjack, like an idiot.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
And my wife always said.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
If we're going to drink, you gotta eat, and so
she always made sure we had something to eat before
we got you know, we went to bed. So she goes,
let's go to the coffee shop like a christ, all right.
So we go to the coffee shop. She gets I
don't know, burger or tacos or something. And then she
asked the waiter, can I get a side of sour cream?
And I said to the waiter, I said, hey, how
much is the side of sour cream? And he said
(22:59):
it's a fifty cents. I said, okay, well let's go
ahead and get that.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
Then what the hell?
Speaker 2 (23:04):
And then the waiter leaves, and my wife said, at
what point were you not going to okay the side
of sour cream. You're spending twenty five or fifty dollars
a hand on blackjack and I couldn't get a dollar
of sour cream because of you.
Speaker 5 (23:18):
Well that's say like the guy gets an elevator, a
husband and wife are arguing, you know, the wife's crying.
Speaker 1 (23:24):
The guy goes, you.
Speaker 6 (23:25):
Lost five hundred and I gave you five hundred dollars,
you lost five What are your native?
Speaker 1 (23:29):
You're stupido. And she goes, but you lost five thousand dollars. Yeah,
but I know how to gamble. Hey, you said you
also said you have a great golf joke. Oh I
like this, well, I mentioned because you talk about a
woman who's corbroke. That's right.
Speaker 5 (23:43):
This guy's Saturday goes out to play golf and he's
running little bit late. On his way home, he sees
a woman with a flat tire. Frantic, oh, waving, Okay,
I got a flat.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
It just looked a mile. I'll help you out. He
changed the time for anything. Get ready to go, She goes,
I'll put you put the spear in the back.
Speaker 4 (23:59):
You go.
Speaker 6 (24:00):
She goes, okay, can you follow me home? Well, you
gotta spread that. Well if I get another flat, he said,
it's only a musha. Well I'm just worried, all right, okay,
So he follows her home.
Speaker 5 (24:09):
They pull in the driveway. He goes, there go you're
all sad. She goes, can I offer you a drink? Well,
I got my wife's waiting. I got just one drink.
All right, it's the guy that has a drink has
another drink. They start talking. Ugh, next you know, they
wind up in bed they're having sex.
Speaker 1 (24:26):
Okay.
Speaker 5 (24:27):
Now it's an eleven o'clock at night. The guy's driving home, going,
what a jerk, what an idiot? I ruined my marriage?
You know, I'm not going to be a hypocrite. When
I get in, I'm just gonna tell my off what happened.
If she wants to divorce me, that's fine. I'm not
going to live alone. He pulls in the drive and
the wife's in the driveway with their arms fold.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
She goes, where were you? I was coming home when
I fly TI, I fixed it for Then she wants
me to follow her home. I said, okay, I said,
here you go.
Speaker 5 (24:50):
You all said? She goes, come in, have a drink.
I said, why can't I just one drink just to
say thing? So we had a drink, had another drink,
We wound up in bed, and we had sex. I says,
you're a damn lie. You're playing another round. But it's
a stupid ship.
Speaker 1 (25:08):
That's fantastic. Can you stay?
Speaker 2 (25:11):
You've gotta go, No, I gotta go now. Okay, we're
going to see you a Cadillac. You know what I
also read recently, maybe maybe I heard this from you.
The Cadillac is the only company I think worldwide that
lowered its demo.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
Not the only, but one of the first, one of
the first rolls. Rois managed to do it too.
Speaker 2 (25:29):
But Cadillac went from being the old man's car, right
like we were kids, your dad's Cadillac, you know. Now
kids know Cadillac for this CTSV and the six speed
manual transmission, and they're very fast, high performance cars.
Speaker 1 (25:41):
You know, they do Narberg Ring and all those kind
of things, you know. So and that gets the demo down.
Speaker 5 (25:47):
You got a lot of young people going because you
can get a Cadillac with a stick shift. You can't
even get Oh that's great. You can't get a Corvet
anymore with the sticks is that right?
Speaker 1 (25:54):
You can't do that. But the Cadillac again, so it
makes it pretty cool.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
Are they more expensive to get to buy a stick
shift because they gotta make them?
Speaker 1 (26:00):
No, they're about the same. It's about the same. It's
fifty fifty yea.
Speaker 2 (26:04):
Let me ask you a dumb question about about a car.
If if you have a stick shift, do you also
have a transmission.
Speaker 5 (26:11):
Well, yeah, all the stick shift does is shift the transmission.
An automatic shifts to transmission automatically. A stick shift, you're
moving the lever by hand.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
So the so the the transmission in an automatic is
more complicated than a stick shift.
Speaker 1 (26:27):
Oh yeah, yeah, let's look, yea, let's see. I'm gonna
telling you I'm a natural. Yeah, you are a natural. Yes, natural?
What's interesting?
Speaker 2 (26:35):
But yeah, yeah, buddy, thanks for coming out. SAE December tenth.
Speaker 1 (26:38):
See December tenth Cadillact. Yeah, it's a Pasadena dig dog
with you.
Speaker 4 (26:44):
You're listening to Tim conwaytun You're on demand from kf
I AM six forty.
Speaker 1 (26:53):
It is the Conway Show.
Speaker 2 (26:54):
It's Veterans Day when we remember all the veterans and
celebrate the veterans of the Armed forces. So anybody out
there who has served, thank you, thank you, thank you,
thank you, thank you. Could never thank you enough. Without
the brave men and women who served this country for
very little money, very little fame, we could not be
(27:14):
sitting here doing this right now. This country would not
exist if it wasn't for brave people who went out
there and fought and for this country.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
My dad was in the Army.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
He served up at Fort Lewis outside of Seattle, and
he was the fastest typist on the base and so
the job that they gave him was typing transfer orders
because back then during the Korean War and into the
Vietnam War, they were just transferring people. Actually it's more
(27:52):
I think the Korean War they were just transfer people
all the time. And so those transfer orders had to
be typed up and they would give it to my
dad and he would type it up, you know, just
bang bang. It was all day long, just type transfer orders.
And then he was able to transfer himself to Cleveland, Ohio,
where his parents lived every Christmas and Thanksgiving, so he'd
(28:16):
you know, transfer himself to Cleveland for four days and
then transfer himself back. And that's how he got to,
you know, take these C one thirties that were being
flown around the country and transferring people around. He got
transferred home every holiday, so that was one of the
benefits of doing that. And if you remember the Carol
Burnet Show where my dad was doing a sketch Tim
(28:37):
Conway and Harvey Corman, where my dad was a dentist,
and he accidentally put novakane, threw Harvey Corman's cheek into
his own thumb and numbed his thumb. That came from
a true story. My dad was having a tooth filled
or root canal at the army base up outside of
Seattle and Fort Lewis, and the dentist in the army,
(29:01):
you know, he probably trained for three weeks, then they
give you a lab coat and you're off to the races.
He put the nova Kane, threw my dad's cheek into
his own thumb and numbed his hand while he was
trying to perform a root canal on my dad. It's
true start and he made a sketch out of it
many many years later. But with the exception of my dad,
(29:21):
I had my uncle tom who was in the Marines,
and he never ever left the Marines. I mean he
I you know, wasn't serving after I think he spent
fifteen years in the Marines. But every day you went
by his house, he was still a marine, yelling at
people telling him what to do, barking out orders. He
(29:44):
never stopped being a marine. And then after that we
sort of tail off. I had a cousin, a cousin Tommy,
who was in the Navy. Actually he worked at Old Navy,
but he would tell people he was in the Navy.
Speaker 6 (30:02):
Navy.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Yeah, so I'm telling you it really tapers off after
my dad and my uncle. My brother was an extra
in saving Private Ryan. Well that should count, right, Yeah,
I mean I guess, you know, I mean somebody had
to do it. And then I have an uncle who auditioned,
didn't get the part, but audition for platoon. Wow. Yeah,
(30:26):
so we sort of really taper off after my dad
and yeah my uncle.
Speaker 3 (30:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Do you have any people that served in your family, Belly,
I'm sure you did. My father was in the Coast Guard,
my mother was in the Air Force. A brother in
them was in the Air Force, yes she was. Wow.
A brother in the Navy, a brother in the Army,
and a nephew in the Navy. Oh my god. Yeah,
I feel bad now that my cousin was just an
(30:53):
old Navy you know what about you? Well, we can
take a break.
Speaker 2 (30:59):
We'll come back and Alaska, Krozier and Angel as well,
and also as Sammy, we'd like to honor all the
people who did serve this great, great country Conway show
on demand on the iHeartRadio app. Now you can always
hear us live on KFI AM six forty four to
seven pm Monday through Friday, and anytime on demand on
(31:20):
the iHeartRadio app,
It's KMF.
Speaker 2 (00:00):
I am six forty and you're listening to the Conway
Show on demand on the iHeartRadio app. We've got great,
great guests coming in today, a guy who used to
host the Tonight Show. Maybe you could probably guess who
that is. Jay Leno's coming in shortly, so that's cool.
(00:23):
But let's start with the very, very popular and hardworking
Alex Stone with ABC.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
Dudes, Hi, you bob oh.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
Compared to Jay Leno, I've been seeing all those commercials
where he's telling me how amazing the new Lexus is.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
Oh yeah, yes, yes, yes, we're doing a thing in
December at Pasadena Cadillac. I guess Cadillac's got a new
car out as well. You know, do you have electric
or you were old school like me?
Speaker 1 (00:46):
Again, So I've got a GMC.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
I put gas in there.
Speaker 1 (00:50):
Yeah, I love the smell of that. You know, I'm
letting gas. Such a kid.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
I used to love the smell of it. I know
I'd killed brain cells doing that, but oh I did
stool like where would it. The more exhausted would come
out and it'd be cold in the morning. You'd smell
that against It's like rubbers cemented weirdly smelled good.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
I know.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
It's one of the nice things about when I was younger,
and we're about the same age, when you went to
the airport, that jet fuel smell was awesome.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
We're like, why do I like this? But it's great.
That's good. Wakes up in the morning, the jet fuel action.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Speaking of airports, a lot of cancelation ton Yeah, around.
Speaker 3 (01:22):
Eighteen hundred today, and the numbers went up because they
went from four percent, which they implemented last week and
then we all know about and then today they went
up to six percent on their way to ten percent,
even though today Sean Duffy said they hope they don't
have to go to ten percent, that they're only going
to go up if they feel like that they've got
to based on the staffing of air traffic controllers. Bit
(01:43):
of good news in that today, according to the Transportation Department,
the number of air traffic controllers all of a sudden skyrocketed.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
The people showing up to.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Work now coincidence, Well, Duffy is saying, well, this is
because they see light at the end of the tunnel
and all of that, and think you could argue it's
the President also saying he's going to penalize them if
they don't show up, and that those who do will
get full pay out of ten thousand dollars bonus, And
that might have something to do with it.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
Well, but how doff you put it to day in Chicon.
Speaker 2 (02:12):
Your traffic controllers are seen in the end to the
shutdown and feel more hopeful, and.
Speaker 1 (02:18):
They're coming in to their facilities. So we're grateful to
them for all that they're doing.
Speaker 3 (02:22):
So maybe it's a bit of feeling more hopeful and
a bit of Oh, the President may actually doc us
pay if we don't come in. But he says if
they do get a deal done, or when they do
within twenty four to forty eight hours of the government reopening,
that they're going to get seventy percent of their back pay.
So there's a real chance by the end of this week,
if they speed this thing through tomorrow, that by like Friday,
(02:44):
these air traffic controllers and TSA and everybody else who
have got all of these weeks without getting paid, that
they may all of a sudden direct deposit. They may
have a bunch of money for the last month in
their bank account.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Oh that's great, that's fantastic.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
Hey, you know, when you and I were first starting out,
the guy who owned the company and the senior employees
always had the power in the company. You know, you're
always afraid of pissing off the guy that owned the
company or the president of the company at whatever. But
now it's the people who walk in off the street.
They have all the power. Like all the kids who
work here at iHeart, they have all the power because
(03:18):
they can go to HR and tell HR anything about
any of us, and then all of a sudden there's
an investigation.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
It sounds about it, right.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
But the air traffic controllers, that's a new found tremendous
power in this country.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
They're very powerful. They can shut down the United States.
Speaker 3 (03:35):
And they got credit for in the last shutdown for
ending that one because when air traffic got messed up
in that one pretty quickly then everybody said, well, let's
put an end to this thing, and it was over
and done. Now that they haven't had that much power,
at least in that respect in this one, because air
traffic has not been doing great and that didn't end
it right away. But you're right, and because they have
(03:56):
the ability, it is written into contracts and other things
that they can take this time off and not get
docked for it and not actually even in some cases
they're not taking sick time when they're away during a
government shutdown, but they're still going to get paid. And
look that the president can threaten all kinds of things,
but it is written into law that they're going to
get their back pay. And he actually signed that law
(04:18):
in twenty nineteen, so it'd be going against his own law.
They're going to get their back pay no matter what
rhetoric is out there. So they'll get that money. And
they know that, and so they do have the ability
to put a lot of pressure on the government and
on the American public to get angry enough to force
their lawmakers to come to a deal by making sure
(04:38):
that they're not there.
Speaker 1 (04:39):
And then so the air traffic control system doesn't run smoothly.
But they're a critical part.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
They should never be allowed to call out sick or
take any kind of work action. It paralyzes the entire country.
Speaker 3 (04:50):
Well, you could also argue maybe they should, like FBI
agents and others, be written into where they get paid
during a government shutdown no matter what. Then we only
enough to deal with it. Yea, they get paid at
that time, and that's gonna be a big chunk of
money that they get. You know, they're gonna wake up,
you know, on Friday or Monday with a big, huge deposit. Yeah,
seventy percent of their back pay and then eventually the
rest will come and then they're they're current pay as well.
(05:12):
So that's gonna be for six seven weeks. That's a
fair amount of pay that they've been dealing without. Now
a lot of that will just go to whatever bills
they've been putting off for many of them, But that's
gonna be a lot of money.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
But we did a story yesterday that it takes three
years of heavy training. Most of them go to Oklahoma
and takes three years of heavy training in order to
become an air traffic controller.
Speaker 3 (05:34):
Yeah, it's a long time. They've got an academy, just
like going to a police academy or a fire academy,
and they go through and a lot of them get
weeded out during this because you want them to whether
it be the psychological reasons, you want them to be
totally locked in on what they're doing. They're training itself,
the stress of it, not somebody who's going to freak
out when they're under stress and things are getting bad
(05:55):
and weather's bad. That it's it's tough to become an
air traffic controller. And the average pay I think when
we've looked it up, is like one hundred and forty
four thousand or so for all of what they go
through to get to that spot. The pay is not
that great. Yeah, it's good for a government job. But
to think of how much of their life they give
up and the training that they go through, and that
your life is in their hands every time you get
(06:16):
on a on an airplane, that they're not getting paid
a ton.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
Yeah, and it's a very stressful job for one hundred
and forty four thousand dollars a year.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
Oh, absolutely, A lot of lives are in their hands.
Speaker 4 (06:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
I mean they could go to the racetrack and you know,
if they if they're a good handicapper, they can make
that in you know, two months.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
And not kill anybody in it. That's right, That's exactly right.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
Funny.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
I appreciate you coming on. I we'll speak you soon.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
Ding Dong with you, digs along with you, doll Stone,
everybody with ABC News. Lucas walked in, Jay Leno, how
you Bob, Hey, let's turn your mic on. There he
goes that Jay Leno is with us. Jay, how you, Bob?
Speaker 1 (06:53):
I'm fine? Hey, no you sound great man? Why thank you?
Speaker 4 (06:56):
Thank you?
Speaker 1 (06:56):
I'm you come in? Is that talking like that? Price
picks unbelievable?
Speaker 2 (07:01):
As Jay walked in, we saw commercial for Yama Va
when you're doing the Yama Yamava giveaway.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
I got one Thursday night we're giving away. What's that?
I think that's Alexis Alexis. Yeah, it's really cool.
Speaker 5 (07:12):
We get to pick cars people actually want, you know,
a lot of times they give away cars and it's
you know, the fleet cars from the rental rental car
that you know, but but these are actually do what
do you people want?
Speaker 1 (07:23):
Rolls races?
Speaker 2 (07:24):
They want you know, right, what's your favorite car on
a daily basis?
Speaker 1 (07:28):
To drive around it? My favorite car? Your favorite causes?
Speaker 5 (07:32):
Well, I drive my Model te around a lot because
nobody can steal it. And okay, yeah, and it's a.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Lot of fake you know, we can see it because
they don't know how to drive it.
Speaker 5 (07:38):
I don't know how to drive it, canon can don't
know how to start it, and it has no break
so you can't stop so that's great.
Speaker 2 (07:43):
What was the really loud jet engine car that you
you turned on for us when we were there?
Speaker 1 (07:48):
That was a loud jet engine car? Exactly?
Speaker 5 (07:50):
That's right, Like, well, you're becoming quite the automotive whizz.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
Is that a jet engine on the car? It is
a get engine? Wow, that's right. I've got a few.
I got a jet engine motorcycle as well, so that's
kind of fun.
Speaker 2 (08:02):
I saw a TV show that you're doing. I think
it was Jay Leno's garage. Were you out there testing cars?
And I think you were going over two hundred miles
an hour in a car. What's the fastest you've ever
gone in to the car?
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Two seventy eight? Wow? Is that right?
Speaker 5 (08:15):
And the American Eagle and the New York Dry like
so that was a lot of fun. But there's nothing
to hit, so you don't really think you're going that fast.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
But when you're that low to the ground going two
hundred and seventy eight miles an hour, it must seem
like you're going ten thousand miles an hour.
Speaker 5 (08:28):
No, it seems like you're going two seven night. Ten
thousand miles an hour feels.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Like like when you're driving a go cart. Remember when
you were a kid and my neighbor would have a
go cart and you were buzzing around thirty miles an hour.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
That seemed really fast. Well it does, yeah, because the
wheels are small. Were you always a car guy even
when you were a kid. Yeah, I mean I grew
up in New England.
Speaker 5 (08:47):
There was always broken snowboll wheels or lawnmowers or something
to fix or play with, so yeah, yeah, I enjoyed it.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
Yeah, Now, you were not an automotive kid.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
I was not an automotive guy. You were at the track,
that's right. Yeah, I was at the race track trying
to make enough money to buy myself an automotive.
Speaker 5 (09:03):
Well that's a wonderful story, automobile. That's one of those
stories they tell the young people.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
I was handy though, electronically, like I was the first
kid that I know that I took apart my remote
for the front gate for our house and I put
it in the dashboard and then had an exterior switch
where I just turned on and off, where I could
open the gate with a switch, and that was pretty
impressive for chicks.
Speaker 5 (09:25):
Yeah, the problem was you had to be in the
car to open the gate. If you walk up to
the gate.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Excuse me, I gotta get I gotta get ma. Where's
the car gate? The car's lock. I want to open
the gate to show Susan. I noticed that. And I
missed these.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
And I know that you've you know, I don't know
if you miss them or not. But the cigarette lighter
was a big part of my life. They're gone, Yes,
the cigarette lighter.
Speaker 5 (09:46):
How sadly, as a child, I can imagine how that
would have been a huge thing.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
That's a big deal. Well that was called a power plug. Right,
it's the same thing. You could pretend it's a cigarette.
Speaker 6 (09:55):
Right.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
And well, I'll tell you something.
Speaker 5 (09:57):
I had a Kaiser Nash which had the best dumbest accessory.
It had a It wasn't sold by cars, it was
after market the dealer. It's a box and it plugs
into the cigarette lighter and you fill it with cigarettes,
all right, And as you're driving, you press a button.
The cigarette rolls down.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Oh that's great.
Speaker 5 (10:18):
The thing comes out, lights it and he's the best part.
It flicks it up in the air and you catch it.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
Oh that's and in the end you see the guy
and the woman's.
Speaker 5 (10:27):
Like ooh, ooh, how sophisticated. Yeah, they don't show you
the cigarette. Oh you're dropping and burns the car to
the ground.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Right, It's like, you know the woman that used to
have the hole in her throat saying, you know, don't smoke.
That backfired on them because that woman lived thirty eight
years with that hole in her throat.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Well there you go. She's like ninety eight when she died.
I think that's an inspirational story, you know.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
But I was always jealous of her that she could
have two cigarettes at once, one in their mouth and
one of her throat.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
I think you inhale them blow out with the other.
So he got up.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
She had a blowhole, right, a smoking blowhole. Ah, rights,
we got we got a big announcement.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
We come back.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
We're doing a show together. That's right, that's right. Sadly
show how far my career is at Pasadena Cadillac.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
Yeah, that'll be fun. That'll be good times.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
Are there entering F one racing? You know, I know
you're a big racing I'm a big F one guy.
It's gonna be Las Vegas. But the F means something
totally different.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
Oh yeah, years the F one. That's right, all right?
Speaker 4 (11:21):
Jay, letters, whether you're listening to Tim Conway Junior on
demand from k f I A M six forty.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
Jay Leton, nice to see you, man, You're good to see.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
When we took a tour of your garage. You're a
very nice John. What's John's last name?
Speaker 1 (11:37):
John Parrah?
Speaker 2 (11:38):
John Parrah. What a sweet man that is who gave
us a tour? And you've been lifelong friends with him?
Or since you've been out here you've been friends with him?
Speaker 5 (11:44):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (11:44):
Yeah, very loyal to your friends. Yeah, exactly exactly. That's
why I'm here.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
That's exactly right, I think on such bigger show, that's
exactly right. We were. We took the tour of your garage.
Oh you're on TV now too with Yamava. That must
have taken all day to shoot all those different angles.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
No, it took really half hour. I work very quickly.
Did they shoot it at did they come to you
or you went to that came to the garage? Boom
bang it out here? And what are you giving away
a Lexus this time? It's I think let lexis is standing.
We have a super come up? Another guard, you know
my favorite one.
Speaker 5 (12:18):
We gave away a rolls Rice. Wow, this is unbelievable
and this is absolutely true. The guy that wins twenty
two year old security guard from China, been here eight
months okay from the excitement point of view, probably the
worst guy to.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
Win the money. He wins a million dollars. Thank you,
I mean American thank you. Okay. So he goes like,
are you happy about about the rolls?
Speaker 4 (12:44):
Rice?
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Yes?
Speaker 5 (12:45):
Yes, very beautiful car. Okay, Well thank you think and
that this this hand to God, this is true. I
give him the keys to the rolls.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
Rice.
Speaker 5 (12:55):
He walks fifteen feet to the slot machine, holds the handle,
and wins one minut kidding? Is that a security guard
from Wow?
Speaker 1 (13:05):
From China?
Speaker 5 (13:06):
He's there in a visa Wow, and we went rolls
Royce and a million dollars.
Speaker 1 (13:11):
Welcome to America.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Yeah. Now he writes everybody a letter back in China
and goes, hey, you got to get here, you gotta
go here.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Let's see what they do. Believe I'm real, but isn't
that unbelievable.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
We did a we were having a giveaway that we
did for ri em Mattress and they're like six or
seven thousand dollars beds, and we did a remote in Burbank,
and we said, we're going to give away one of
these seven thousand dollars beds. So if you show up,
somebody's gonna win. So two hundred people show up. They
wait around for the whole broadcast, and then we pick
(13:43):
out one person's name. You know, Dale Hennings is Dale Hennings. Here,
anybody Dale Headings, going once, going twice. He's way in
the back of the store buying a mattress and now
he just won one. And that's the only one with
that he sold all day. Is the giveaway, Yo, The
only guy with the credit card buying a mattress just
won the free one.
Speaker 5 (14:04):
I got a mattress story for you, all right. I'm
sitting in my office, trick. I get a call from
Warren Buffett. Okay, he goes, Jay, Hey, he goes. A
friend of mine owns a mattress store in Omaha. He
wants me to be in a commercial.
Speaker 1 (14:15):
I said, I do. I don't know what to do.
Speaker 5 (14:17):
I'm not comfortable. I don't want to talk about I said.
I said, Warren, here's what to do. You go in
the lie down on the bed, just lie down in
bed and go to sleep, and someone will come in
and say, is that Warren Buffett sleeping on that? And
the owner of the store will say, oh, yes, he
comes there every day to sleep because our mattress is
so comfortable.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
So I get a call from more the next day, genius,
thank you very much. Oh yeah, because he was so
he didn't want to he didn't want to be nervous.
Speaker 5 (14:44):
But that's a good match, you know. But it was
felt he just pretended to be asleep. Warman comes in,
Is that my Warren Buffet sleeping there?
Speaker 1 (14:50):
He comes there every day to sleep. Yeah, yeah, that's
a great idea. Yeah, that's fantastic.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
All right, we're doing a special together, a special broadcast Belly.
That's December tenth at four pm, I believe, is that right? Yes,
all right, and it's going to be a cast uh
Pasadena Cadillac Cadillac Capacading Cadillac of Pasadena, and they have
a brand new car out.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
I don't remember the name of the I think.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
It's called a Cadillac. Yes, a Cadillac. You know, my
dad was a big Cadillac guy, did your was your
dad a Cadillac?
Speaker 5 (15:20):
Well, the first thing I did when I made money,
I bought my dad a Cadillac, and not just any Cadillac,
the Italian Cadillac Wow white with red vlora Polster.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
This was the most garish. And my mother was My
mother was from Scotland. She was so oh, Jimmy, Jimmy,
your father that Cadillac.
Speaker 5 (15:38):
Like if when we would go for a ride, I'd
sit in the bag, my mother and father be in
the front. We pulled up to a light, people would
look at the Cadillac and my mother made all down
the window, we're not really Cadillac people.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Our son got us and then my we're driving a
Cadillac carse for Cadillac, and they would start fighting and
the people would take off. Oh it was oh, hilarious, hilarious.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
My my dad I bought a Seville or a Coupe
Deville back in the late seventies and he bought it
from a dealership. I don't want to say the name
of the dealership, but it's in the Van Eys area.
I'm sure you know which one it is. And he
drives it home in the middle of July and the
heater is on. The heater won't go off, and so
he gets home, he sweating his ass off, and he
(16:19):
takes it back to him and says, hey, the heater's on.
And they say, oh, sorry, mister Kahn, we will take
care of that. It was in the shop for a week.
He picks it up, drives it home. The heater's on again.
The heater is on in the middle of now at
the beginning of August, takes it back. At third time,
the heater's on. Oh, we'll give you a loaner here
it is. Third time he gets it home, the heat's
not on. We go out after church on a Sunday,
(16:41):
goes to turn the air conditioning on.
Speaker 1 (16:43):
It's broken. Then the heater comes on.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
So he takes it to the dealership and he pulls
it right up to one of their twenty foot glass
windows and he puts the bumper on the window, then
inches forward and the whole window shaows and he gives
them the keys. He goes, hey, fellas the heaters And
that was really out of character of my dad, but
(17:06):
he was, you know, he paid a lot of money
for the car.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
That heat it was on. There you go, there, they'll
do it.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
But I tell you, Cadillac, over the last like ten
or fifteen years, the way they've put together these cars.
It almost seems like a high end import, you know.
Speaker 4 (17:21):
Like you know what it is.
Speaker 5 (17:22):
It's the great The best thing that had happened to
Detroit was going bankrupt, was that right? Because they got
rid of all the ad guys and the guys that
came from Whirlpool or may Tag to sell cars, and
they brought in engineers. Yeah right, yeah exactly. And now
you have engineer. Now you have Cadillac entering F one racing.
This is the highest, most expensive, most scientific, expensive kind
(17:45):
of racing in the world, and Cadillac is right in
there with Ferrari and all these les.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
So it's going to be exciting. I mean, American engineers
are now kind of the I envy the world, I think.
Speaker 5 (17:56):
So the fact that we can produce a car like
a Corvette for eighty thousand dollars in a union shop,
it's incredible and everybody gets full benefits and the Chinese
paying two bolls an hour can barely match it.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
Yeah, it is great. So the F one, the Cadillac
seuing is are gonna have the Valure seats?
Speaker 1 (18:12):
No, I won't have the vlor seats? No they Okay,
can you stay with us? All right? Jay, Leno's with us.
Speaker 4 (18:18):
Everybody, you're listening to Tim Conway Junior on demand from
KFI AM six forty.
Speaker 2 (18:26):
It is the Conway Show. Jay Leno is with us,
and I always nice to see you, young man. Well,
thank you, thank you, and you look great, well, thank you,
thank you.
Speaker 1 (18:34):
I'm trying to get money hits.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
Oh here you and you had a great joke that
after you got burned in your garage and you paid
for a new face, you would tell people you are
the new face of common.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
That's right. I have the new face, that's right. And
I was two faced as well. That's right. Jay and
I are doing.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
We're out at the Cadillac of Pasadena on December tenth,
and that's before seven pm.
Speaker 5 (19:01):
And Tim will be talking on the scientific validity of
the fuel injection system and he's going to go over
that for the crowd.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
You know, maybe we can do is we'll get some
car parts out there and see if I can identify him.
Speaker 1 (19:13):
Yeah, but what they do. I don't think you've got
to identify the car. Richard Pryor was he around when
you started?
Speaker 5 (19:21):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (19:21):
Very much so.
Speaker 5 (19:22):
I like Richard, great comic, really the most naturally funny guy.
I mean he would just slay the room just to
kill me, just you know.
Speaker 1 (19:31):
Yeah, he was.
Speaker 5 (19:32):
He was just the best, just the best, really funny,
great facial expressions too. Yeah, And it's funny because you know,
a lot of young comics don't really know his work
because he just did Live at the Sunset Trip. He
was like the first comics to shoot a stand up
special that aired in theaters, you know, and so that
was a big deal. The HBO thing was sort of
new at the time, so he hadn't done this. So
(19:54):
there's not a lot of his work out there, but
just hilarious. That's like, you can't repeat most of it,
but it's pretty funny.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
I always thought that Jeff Altman was great. Whatever happened
to him, Jeff I had a who long time. Jeff's
a very funny guy. I know, he moved back east,
he got married.
Speaker 5 (20:10):
Yeah, he was like, you know, all comics are screwed
up in some way, and Jeff certainly takes the title.
I don't mean that insulting way. I just mean because
it's what made him funny. He just got odd, bouncing
off the wall, you know, just very hyper. You know,
was Norm MacDonald out here or did he start back east?
Was he an East Coast comic? Well he's from Canada, okay, Norma,
(20:33):
was you know, really funny? Nobody made me laugh like
norm I remember he used to bring his mom to
see me because I work clean because his mom didn't
like to go to the comedy clubs everybody worked, did
he go?
Speaker 1 (20:44):
So I had a good relationship with him.
Speaker 5 (20:46):
So he takes his mom TOV and he loved to gamble, right,
that was his So so the stand line to check
in at the hotel and it's like maybe twenty people
in front of him. So Norma says, I'm going to
go over the tables a few minutes a wile. Okay,
because on the table loses all his money. He can't
even check in the hotel. Now he lost everything. Everything
(21:09):
on his credit card he lost. He comes back to
his mic.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
We can't say my kind of guy. Yeah, there you go,
my kind of guy.
Speaker 5 (21:18):
Well, here's a gambling joke. Guys walking down the strip
in Vegas. He's right at the end of the strip,
you know where they have that sign welcome lovely. He
sees the guy coming from the desert. You know what's
that The guy crosses the street. So he crosses the
street and then guy's coming through me. He crossed and
the other guy guy crossing, so it's inevitable he's gonna
(21:40):
bump to this guy. And the guy sees him trying
to avoid him because look Sarah, so please don't avoid me.
I'm a very successful businessman where I come from. This
suit this costs thousands of dollars. It's very expensive. I
just had to run of bed, like my car broke
down on the outside.
Speaker 1 (21:54):
Of town, or were sitting in the car. I'm walking
in here.
Speaker 5 (21:57):
I'm a successful businessman where I come from, and I'm
ashamed of myself.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Can you lend me one hundred dollars?
Speaker 5 (22:04):
The guy says, well, if i'd lend you a hundred dollars,
I don't know you won't use it for gambling money.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
I reduce poly takes a bottle water bills. Oh, I
got gambling money. No, I got gambling money. I'm okay.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
And somewhat true. Right, yeah, guys, will you know wait
until the end like we used to. I remember I
was at Mandalay Bay and I was gambling, probably spending
twenty five dollars a hand in blackjack, like an idiot.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
And my wife always said.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
If we're going to drink, you gotta eat, and so
she always made sure we had something to eat before
we got you know, we went to bed. So she goes,
let's go to the coffee shop like a christ, all right.
So we go to the coffee shop. She gets I
don't know, burger or tacos or something. And then she
asked the waiter, can I get a side of sour cream?
And I said to the waiter, I said, hey, how
much is the side of sour cream? And he said
(22:59):
it's a fifty cents. I said, okay, well let's go
ahead and get that.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
Then what the hell?
Speaker 2 (23:04):
And then the waiter leaves, and my wife said, at
what point were you not going to okay the side
of sour cream. You're spending twenty five or fifty dollars
a hand on blackjack and I couldn't get a dollar
of sour cream because of you.
Speaker 5 (23:18):
Well that's say like the guy gets an elevator, a
husband and wife are arguing, you know, the wife's crying.
Speaker 1 (23:24):
The guy goes, you.
Speaker 6 (23:25):
Lost five hundred and I gave you five hundred dollars,
you lost five What are your native?
Speaker 1 (23:29):
You're stupido. And she goes, but you lost five thousand dollars. Yeah,
but I know how to gamble. Hey, you said you
also said you have a great golf joke. Oh I
like this, well, I mentioned because you talk about a
woman who's corbroke. That's right.
Speaker 5 (23:43):
This guy's Saturday goes out to play golf and he's
running little bit late. On his way home, he sees
a woman with a flat tire. Frantic, oh, waving, Okay,
I got a flat.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
It just looked a mile. I'll help you out. He
changed the time for anything. Get ready to go, She goes,
I'll put you put the spear in the back.
Speaker 4 (23:59):
You go.
Speaker 6 (24:00):
She goes, okay, can you follow me home? Well, you
gotta spread that. Well if I get another flat, he said,
it's only a musha. Well I'm just worried, all right, okay,
So he follows her home.
Speaker 5 (24:09):
They pull in the driveway. He goes, there go you're
all sad. She goes, can I offer you a drink? Well,
I got my wife's waiting. I got just one drink.
All right, it's the guy that has a drink has
another drink. They start talking. Ugh, next you know, they
wind up in bed they're having sex.
Speaker 1 (24:26):
Okay.
Speaker 5 (24:27):
Now it's an eleven o'clock at night. The guy's driving home, going,
what a jerk, what an idiot? I ruined my marriage?
You know, I'm not going to be a hypocrite. When
I get in, I'm just gonna tell my off what happened.
If she wants to divorce me, that's fine. I'm not
going to live alone. He pulls in the drive and
the wife's in the driveway with their arms fold.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
She goes, where were you? I was coming home when
I fly TI, I fixed it for Then she wants
me to follow her home. I said, okay, I said,
here you go.
Speaker 5 (24:50):
You all said? She goes, come in, have a drink.
I said, why can't I just one drink just to
say thing? So we had a drink, had another drink,
We wound up in bed, and we had sex. I says,
you're a damn lie. You're playing another round. But it's
a stupid ship.
Speaker 1 (25:08):
That's fantastic. Can you stay?
Speaker 2 (25:11):
You've gotta go, No, I gotta go now. Okay, we're
going to see you a Cadillac. You know what I
also read recently, maybe maybe I heard this from you.
The Cadillac is the only company I think worldwide that
lowered its demo.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
Not the only, but one of the first, one of
the first rolls. Rois managed to do it too.
Speaker 2 (25:29):
But Cadillac went from being the old man's car, right
like we were kids, your dad's Cadillac, you know. Now
kids know Cadillac for this CTSV and the six speed
manual transmission, and they're very fast, high performance cars.
Speaker 1 (25:41):
You know, they do Narberg Ring and all those kind
of things, you know. So and that gets the demo down.
Speaker 5 (25:47):
You got a lot of young people going because you
can get a Cadillac with a stick shift. You can't
even get Oh that's great. You can't get a Corvet
anymore with the sticks is that right?
Speaker 1 (25:54):
You can't do that. But the Cadillac again, so it
makes it pretty cool.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
Are they more expensive to get to buy a stick
shift because they gotta make them?
Speaker 1 (26:00):
No, they're about the same. It's about the same. It's
fifty fifty yea.
Speaker 2 (26:04):
Let me ask you a dumb question about about a car.
If if you have a stick shift, do you also
have a transmission.
Speaker 5 (26:11):
Well, yeah, all the stick shift does is shift the transmission.
An automatic shifts to transmission automatically. A stick shift, you're
moving the lever by hand.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
So the so the the transmission in an automatic is
more complicated than a stick shift.
Speaker 1 (26:27):
Oh yeah, yeah, let's look, yea, let's see. I'm gonna
telling you I'm a natural. Yeah, you are a natural. Yes, natural?
What's interesting?
Speaker 2 (26:35):
But yeah, yeah, buddy, thanks for coming out. SAE December tenth.
Speaker 1 (26:38):
See December tenth Cadillact. Yeah, it's a Pasadena dig dog
with you.
Speaker 4 (26:44):
You're listening to Tim conwaytun You're on demand from kf
I AM six forty.
Speaker 1 (26:53):
It is the Conway Show.
Speaker 2 (26:54):
It's Veterans Day when we remember all the veterans and
celebrate the veterans of the Armed forces. So anybody out
there who has served, thank you, thank you, thank you,
thank you, thank you. Could never thank you enough. Without
the brave men and women who served this country for
very little money, very little fame, we could not be
(27:14):
sitting here doing this right now. This country would not
exist if it wasn't for brave people who went out
there and fought and for this country.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
My dad was in the Army.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
He served up at Fort Lewis outside of Seattle, and
he was the fastest typist on the base and so
the job that they gave him was typing transfer orders
because back then during the Korean War and into the
Vietnam War, they were just transferring people. Actually it's more
(27:52):
I think the Korean War they were just transfer people
all the time. And so those transfer orders had to
be typed up and they would give it to my
dad and he would type it up, you know, just
bang bang. It was all day long, just type transfer orders.
And then he was able to transfer himself to Cleveland, Ohio,
where his parents lived every Christmas and Thanksgiving, so he'd
(28:16):
you know, transfer himself to Cleveland for four days and
then transfer himself back. And that's how he got to,
you know, take these C one thirties that were being
flown around the country and transferring people around. He got
transferred home every holiday, so that was one of the
benefits of doing that. And if you remember the Carol
Burnet Show where my dad was doing a sketch Tim
(28:37):
Conway and Harvey Corman, where my dad was a dentist,
and he accidentally put novakane, threw Harvey Corman's cheek into
his own thumb and numbed his thumb. That came from
a true story. My dad was having a tooth filled
or root canal at the army base up outside of
Seattle and Fort Lewis, and the dentist in the army,
(29:01):
you know, he probably trained for three weeks, then they
give you a lab coat and you're off to the races.
He put the nova Kane, threw my dad's cheek into
his own thumb and numbed his hand while he was
trying to perform a root canal on my dad. It's
true start and he made a sketch out of it
many many years later. But with the exception of my dad,
(29:21):
I had my uncle tom who was in the Marines,
and he never ever left the Marines. I mean he
I you know, wasn't serving after I think he spent
fifteen years in the Marines. But every day you went
by his house, he was still a marine, yelling at
people telling him what to do, barking out orders. He
(29:44):
never stopped being a marine. And then after that we
sort of tail off. I had a cousin, a cousin Tommy,
who was in the Navy. Actually he worked at Old Navy,
but he would tell people he was in the Navy.
Speaker 6 (30:02):
Navy.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Yeah, so I'm telling you it really tapers off after
my dad and my uncle. My brother was an extra
in saving Private Ryan. Well that should count, right, Yeah,
I mean I guess, you know, I mean somebody had
to do it. And then I have an uncle who auditioned,
didn't get the part, but audition for platoon. Wow. Yeah,
(30:26):
so we sort of really taper off after my dad
and yeah my uncle.
Speaker 3 (30:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Do you have any people that served in your family, Belly,
I'm sure you did. My father was in the Coast Guard,
my mother was in the Air Force. A brother in
them was in the Air Force, yes she was. Wow.
A brother in the Navy, a brother in the Army,
and a nephew in the Navy. Oh my god. Yeah,
I feel bad now that my cousin was just an
(30:53):
old Navy you know what about you? Well, we can
take a break.
Speaker 2 (30:59):
We'll come back and Alaska, Krozier and Angel as well,
and also as Sammy, we'd like to honor all the
people who did serve this great, great country Conway show
on demand on the iHeartRadio app. Now you can always
hear us live on KFI AM six forty four to
seven pm Monday through Friday, and anytime on demand on
(31:20):
the iHeartRadio app,
Tim Conway Jr. on Demand News
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