December 9, 2025 • 30 mins
Welcome to another Best Of hour with Tim Conway Jr., featuring big laughs, big names, and even bigger trouble for Tim. Jay Leno stops by and immediately starts roasting Conway about his life story — from fast food pilgrimages to casual Target adventures, Jay gives him a hard time in only the way Leno can.
Jay also shares a heartfelt and funny look back at Norm Macdonald, delivering stories you don’t hear every day. Then Mark Thompson joins the party for a round of “tipping confusion,” where a simple question spirals fast and Tim tries (and fails) to shut the whole thing down.
The hour winds down with Conway confessing his favorite cereal, sparking a wave of nostalgia about those tiny hotel cereal boxes every kid fought over.
A funny, warm, all-over-the-place Best Of that reminds you why Tim Conway Jr. is radio comfort food.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's camp.
Speaker 2 (00:00):
I am sixty and you're listening to the Conway Show
on demand on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
Leno's with us, Jay Leno, How you.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
Bob tem I just enjoying your inspiring rags target story there?
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Yeah, which target story?
Speaker 3 (00:22):
Well, your life story? How you came up and used
to listen to the station. I was thinking of a
kid's day. But you know, you see the McDonald's every day,
and then one day I went to high school, and
then I graduated, and now I worked there. Now I've
been on shakes now for fifteen years, and just think
I started eating here. You know it's I really heard
(00:45):
a person do their own eulogy.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
That's so great. I'm glad you picked up on that.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
I couldn't help. But think of my father. You know
that guy Luigi whatever his name is, shot the guy right,
the most Italian name you could possibly get sure, And
when I was a kid in my every time I
had to my frog, I have a time and plenty
of Italians and untouchable every time the bed and my
dad would read that sorga. He's probably just half a talent.
He's not even all Italian. Guy Italian did something wrong
(01:14):
they're not really Italian, They're just some of those.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
Things, you know, Right, Jay, I got a great idea
for you, and and I don't. I don't want you
to say yes or no right now, but an I
have an opportunity for both of us. All Right, you
have a great car collection, is that true?
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Well have some cars.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
I think you have hundreds of cars. All right, Okay,
I think you could add to it by buying and
displaying the car that I raised my family on, my
two thousand and seven Lincoln Navigator. You can add it
to your collection. Well, I'll make your sweet deal and
then people can come by the when they come buy
the shop, they're like, oh, that's Conway's old car.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
Yeah. I just can't. I just couldn't handle the crowd.
That's fine. I don't have the room, you know. I
just think that would be a huge, huge problem. But yeah, yeah,
that sounds fine. I got that car.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Yeah, I still got the car.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Well, it was not a cheap car. That was like,
when did you buy it? It was last year.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
It was sixty five thousand dollars when I bought it,
and I didn't know how I was going to pay
for it. Back in two thousand and seven.
Speaker 3 (02:19):
Oh okay, but he stated, but Jay, it.
Speaker 1 (02:21):
Was state of the art.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
It was the first one that had navigation, It had
you know, electric everything.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
It was great.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
And then all the other cars passed it. And now it's, uh,
you know, it's it's outdated. I have to buy a
new DVD to update the navigation.
Speaker 3 (02:38):
Well, I actually wasn't the first to have navigation.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
It was the first tithing in my in my group
of friends.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
I think Columbus might argue with that.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
Okay, all right, but Jay, look I had navigation. Nobody
had navigation back then. I had satellite radio built in.
Nobody had that back then.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Nobody.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
Well, that's a life of privilege.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
Yes, that's exactly right.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
You're a baby, and that's right.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
And I had that car for eighteen years. I'm going
to tell you what's wrong with it.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Though.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
Every time I go out to start it, the back
of the car is sitting on the back tires.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
So there must be something wrong with the rear suspension.
Is that right?
Speaker 3 (03:11):
Yeah? I think what you have what's called a flat tire.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Now, the tires are the car, The tires are in
great shape. The car sits on the tires. If it's
if it's you know, it sits long enough. What's the
problem do you think?
Speaker 3 (03:28):
Well, tis slap spot? Maybe just don't have enough You
might not have enough air.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
I'm telling you. The tires are fine. The car comes
down and sits on the tires. Then I started up
and the car comes up off the tires.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
Well it doesn't have an air suspensions.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Yes, yes, it does well air suspensions. Okay, all right,
So is that something you can work on for me
or not?
Speaker 3 (03:49):
You know, I can't do it right now because I'm
on the phone. I'm talking to the on the phone.
I can't do it now. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'd love to. Yeah,
that's it sounds like just the kind of like to
it involved in.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
That is great. I saw you on with Bill Maher
talking and then they're.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Still beating you up over this this accident that you
had in Pittsburgh.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
You know, this is what I love about the press.
It's so stupid.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
It's dumb as hell.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
You know, I'm dyslexic, so I don't Campbell. I go
to Vegas and they go, sir, it's twenty one, you
have twenty eight, what you know. I don't know how
to gamble. I just liked the idea that the mob
would drive to Greensburg, Pennsylvania, wait at the Hampton in
on a rainy day for me to show up and
throw me down the hill. I mean, hilarious, hilarious.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Let me ask you a question.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Do you are you listening to some of these new
comics like this THEO Vaughn, you know who he is.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
I like to call the new comedy. You know, I
like anything I hate more than comics, trash and other comics.
This guy's no good thing, you know, God bless anybody
makes a living. It's a tough business. And if you
can make a living doing it without you know, being
racist and things, you know whatever, good for you. Okay,
So I don't you know, I do like everybody doing
it there. And you have different senses of humor, you know.
(05:07):
I mean I watched the on comics and they're doing
jokes on Vemo, and I'm just gotta know what that
I never use those things. Okay, fine, so it's just different,
but but it doesn't mean it's not funny.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
I love THEO Vaughn, and I think that that he's
like the new Norm McDonald of comedy. I think that,
you know, that he's he's pretty simple. And people always
thought that Norm McDonald wasn't that bright. But I thought
he was the funniest of all.
Speaker 3 (05:34):
Nor McDonald came this close to winning everything on Who
Wants to Be a Millionaire? Oh?
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Is that right?
Speaker 3 (05:41):
He got always he knew everything. He was a smart guy.
He was well read. Wow, and he was really conservative.
People think he's like, you know, the Hollywood liberal. He wasn't.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
I remember when he went on Larry King and he
said to Larry, I'm deeply, deeply I'm a deeply, deeply
closeted homo set actual and Larry King said, oh, so
you're almost actual, because no, Larry, Larry, I'm telling you, Larry, Larry,
what's wrong with you?
Speaker 1 (06:06):
I'm deeply, deeply closet.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
He was funny, David, tell you sorry. He used to
bring his mother to see me.
Speaker 2 (06:15):
All right, hold on, se hold him and say, Jay
Leno was about tell us the greatest story in the
history of the world about nor McDonald's mom going to
see Jay Leno in concert. So hang on, we'll get
to that story.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
You're listening to Tim Conway Junior on demand from KFI
AM six forty.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
Jay Leno is wh us Jay, welcome back to the program.
Speaker 3 (06:39):
Thank you, thank you for talking about Norm McDonald.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
Yeah, so Norm McDonald used to his mom used to
go to your show.
Speaker 3 (06:46):
Yeah, he used to bring his mom to see me
because I work clean so he can take his mom
and see the other comics. So it was funny. But
one day he takes his mom to Vegas. He takes
three thousand dollars out of the bank. They're checking in
at the hotel. He says his mom, I'm gonna go
over here to the table. I'll be right back. He
(07:07):
goes to the table, loses all his money. He can't
even pay for the hotel. Now he loses all the
money that he has. He had three thousand dollars to
treat his mom for the weekend, thinking that would be enough.
And he gets back he goes mine, not any money.
It's so stupid.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
Yeah, so stupid, and he had that's all the money
he had.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Yeah, I mean, great comic, genuine original. You know, there's
some people that are funny because they tell jokes. He
just says things funny a lot of times. It's not
necessarily a joke, it's just the way he says it.
And he uses unusual words and a wiener dog. This
guy's a wiener dog and you're laughing at the name
(07:54):
wiener dog, but he keeps repeating. You know, he's just
really brilliant. He was fascinating to listen to. It got
kind of like almost like a Mark Twain. You know,
you just enjoy hearing him speak.
Speaker 2 (08:04):
When when he was on I think he was on
with Conan O'Brien, and you know, he had a set
that he was going to do, you know, four to
five minutes, and then Conan said, oh, Norm McDonald's going
to stay with us, and Norm McDonald flipped out. He
says during the commercial where he goes, I don't have
anything else. I don't know, you know, when we come
back for another five minutes, I've got nothing. And Conan said, well,
(08:25):
just make something up. And he turned a thirty second
joke into a five minute joke about some kind of
moth or something and was brilliant.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
Oh. I think that's the one about the moss it goes. Yeah,
I remember the Yeah, I remember that story. It was
about a moss goes to the dentist and the whole
thing that that that the final dentist goes, why did
you pick me? And the Moss says, your light was
on and it's a great joke. It's a great joke.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
Yeah, and I really miss him. He used to come
on with us all the time.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
Just one of the nicest guys in the world, never
affected by show business. He was good friends he had,
you know, he had a lot of guys that were friends.
Not necessarily comics, but you know, friends that were just
normal everyday guys.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
Yeah, interesting people, you know, he just he he didn't
have a very good meter for sexist or whatever, you know, Timmy.
It was all just funny. So he would all often
get in trouble.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
Yeah, it was great.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
So I turned my TV on the other day, and
you know, if you have, I don't know what I have.
I think it's a spectrum. But before spectrum comes on,
I have just some kind.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
Of well you we're not talking about an arrow disease. Now,
you're talking about cable that's right, Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
And I have and I and I turned the TV
on and forever they were running Conan reruns, and you know,
so you watch a little of that, then you go
on to cable whatever. And now Letterman has his own
station where it's all his old reruns, which is great
because that's when Letterman was funny.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
Right right, and so was always funny, was always yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:03):
But but nowadays, you know with the this guy needs
no introduction, there's no humor in those things.
Speaker 1 (10:09):
He's a very serious man nowadays.
Speaker 3 (10:11):
This straight interview. That is true.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
But Jay, you never gave up comedy. He did well.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
You know, Dave was never comfortable being a stand up comedian.
Day was a brilliant host and and truly a funny comedian,
but he didn't like the road. I mean one of
the funniest things this was let him in on the
road opening for Tony Orlando. I mean, just the funniest
commedation you can imagine. He was just so uncomfortable because
he was always wildly ironic in his humor and if
(10:43):
you to get that or you don't, I mean he
always made me laugh. I mean since the first time
I saw him. I went up to him and I said,
you know, I love the way you you your great wordsmith.
I like how you weave words together. And he goes,
how could you get up there and just start talking
about being nervous? So we kind of set off each
other you know, he took from me a certain amount
of energy and I took from him. Boy, that's a
(11:04):
really clever way of speaking and talking, you know, So
we really when I would do his show, it's still
my favorite time of my career, just going on and
just let him deliberately try to sidetrack me, and then
I would I would come back, and it was always
it was always just my favorite time in my career
because it wasn't like it wasn't any competition. It was
(11:26):
just another comic and he was the guy with the show,
and it was wonderful. I really enjoyed it. I really
looked back fondly on those days.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
What about What was your relationship with Johnny Carson? Did
you hang with Johnny?
Speaker 3 (11:38):
Well, no, you don't hang with you know, I grew
up in New England, where you know, like to me,
the strangest thing being in California. Oh Jay, these are
my parents Bob and Agnes. Well, how are you miss missus? Mancheli?
I can't call you Bob and Agnes. I'm sorry. You're
my friend's parents. So I would go, well, thank you,
mister Carson. He goes, ditch down you okay, Johnny? I mean,
I just I always I'm with you.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
I'm with you.
Speaker 3 (11:59):
You know, it's it's just a different way of being
brought up. You just people are elders. And so with Johnny,
I couldn't. Never, I couldn't say to Johnny, hey, Johnny,
nice tie pal. You know you can't you can't do that.
But with let him and I could, and that was
it was a fun part.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
I'm the same way.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
I have friends from you know, third grade, you know,
Matt McDaniel, Robbie Fox, Mike Tennessee. And when I when
I run into their parents, I still call them mister
Fox or missus McDaniel and missus Tennessee.
Speaker 1 (12:26):
And I can't stop that.
Speaker 3 (12:28):
Yeah. Well, my own to my own history teacher came
to see me, uh kind of, you know, I guess
to drink. Mister Robson, call me Fred, call me Fred.
I'm not giving. I'm giving a guy named Fred or whiskey. Okay,
you're gonna have a soft drink. Mister. You know you're
my history teacher. I'm sorry, I can't you. Yeah, No,
it's just very very funny. It's fun.
Speaker 1 (12:47):
It's being brought up properly, is what that is.
Speaker 3 (12:49):
By calling somebody that's true, just being you know, when
I was a kid, I used to love the Danny
Thomas Show because Danny Townas was a performer and he
would be at home with a family and then at
night you go out to the club to work and
come home again. I thought, we wouldn't it be great
if you could be a comedian. We're not going out
of town. You could just go to the club, you know,
(13:10):
try out jokes. So when Flapper's open, when the Comedy
Magic Club opening at Rosa Beach, I would say to
my I mean, I'm going to see my agent, Sid Helper,
and I'm going to get out to the club. You
know Sid Helper with Dandy Thomas's agent on the show.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
That's great.
Speaker 3 (13:23):
It always used to make me laugh. I thought, oh god,
I'm living the life I wanted to live when I
was a little kid.
Speaker 1 (13:28):
Yeah, that's awesome, Buddy, break a leg tonight.
Speaker 3 (13:30):
They still say thanks, thanks, good luck and keep, you know,
write a book about that inspiring story about I will.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
All right, thanks Jaylen.
Speaker 4 (13:40):
You're listening to Tim Conway Junior on de Mayo from
kf I am six forty.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
All right, Mark Thompson, very generous man when he goes
on vacation.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
You said you're like a Rockefeller.
Speaker 5 (13:55):
Let me just this, I'm not. I'm just I just
tip an appropriate amount. I'm not something like over tip, but.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
Use the term Rockefeller.
Speaker 5 (14:01):
Well, when I go into a hotel and I'm a
new guest, I'm tipping like a Rockefeller, because.
Speaker 1 (14:06):
What does Rockefeller mean? Well, how much a night?
Speaker 5 (14:09):
It's not that, it's before that even happens. And they
take the bags out of the cab. I give that
guy ten bucks, and then the guy takes the bags
from the cab to the front desk. Give that guy
ten bucks, and the guy from the from the desk
up to the room. He'll get between ten and twenty,
depending on how many.
Speaker 1 (14:25):
Bags we have.
Speaker 5 (14:25):
So I try to, like a rock, take care. Then
I tip the front desk person who's given me the room.
So my point is when I come in, I come
in hot okay, but I'm not you know, for a
normal dinner or something. I'm not like some incredible tipper
at all. But I but when I'm at a hotel,
I've just come back from a hotel. So that's where
this comes from. I always take care of the maid
service people always so between five and twenty every day,
(14:49):
but most of the time it's twenty bucks a day,
no between. Usually it's between five and fifteen. So the
reason it's that is because if I've asked for something,
Hey can I get some extra mouth washed there or
someone like that, and then I'll leave them more, you
know what I mean. So anyway, point is this, we've
been there for three days, all right, This is.
Speaker 1 (15:06):
So she could stand to make fifteen bucks over the
three days.
Speaker 5 (15:09):
Right, five bucks are or more? In this case, I
did leave her. We left her. I think she I'm
going to say she was maybe twice that thirty bucks,
which she's probably not. Okay, so not a big deal.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
We should get a condo in Maui.
Speaker 5 (15:20):
But I'm what I'm saying is that we're compulsed. I'm
compulsive about it, like I really because I think that
they get stiffed a lot.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
She buy a boat.
Speaker 5 (15:26):
So last day we said what time we're leaving my
in court and said don't be out of here by
eleven forty five. Said okay, And so I'm going down
to get a coffee and I see the lady who
cleans the room, and she's right there and she's got
that cart, you know, with all that stuff. And I said, hello,
good morning, Thank you so much. I said, we're going
(15:48):
to be leaving at eleven forty five and want you
to know you'll be able to get into the room.
Then she said, oh, thank you. I said, you've been
taking care of the room every day, You've been cleaning it.
She said yes, I said every day you've been cleaning it,
she said, on this ship. So I gave her a
five in addition to the money we're going to leave
her at the end. I gave her a five kind
of person. She said, oh, thank you very very much.
So that's my point. It's not and it's not like
(16:09):
a lot of money, but the point is I let
to let it fly. I walk about fifteen feet and
there's another lady there with a cleaning cart, another five,
and she asks me when will you be leaving the room? Ah,
tag team, And I said'll be leaving at eleven forty five.
I said, have you been taking care of the room
every day? She said yes, I'm taking care of it
(16:32):
every day. I said no, but are you the person
who's actually taking care of it? Because she spoke English
better than the first lady.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
Right, But I would say, before we continue, do you
think the Rockefellers ever had this conversation?
Speaker 5 (16:43):
Okay, you know what, I shouldn't have mentioned the Rockefellers.
You're going to let the Rockefelders go. Okay, you know, really,
you can kill a story like nobody else. What is
your problem? So then I why can't you do what
I do for you, which is just sit there and laugh?
Speaker 1 (16:58):
Did you make her crawl on her hands and you
take it in the end of the store. You got
to kill my store.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
It's not that great to begin with, all right, So
you got the two ladies fighting for the five.
Speaker 5 (17:08):
So then she says, I said, oh, I thought that
lady was the lady who cleaned the room. She said, no, no, no, no,
I've been cleaning the room every day. Said no, I'm thinking, oh,
I just blew away five bucks on that last lady,
and now I'm going to blow and noe. And so
I reach in, I get a five and I give
her the five dollars. But I said, thank you very
mu much. I said, we left a little bit more
behind for you. And then I am at the elevators
(17:32):
about to about to turn the corner. With the other
and there's a third time. No, I swear it. Oh
my god, incredible. She's got a cart just like the
other two ladies. And I said, we're at the We're
at the corner. She said hello, She initiated, she said
good morning. I said hello. I said, we're going to
be We're at the end of the hole. She says, oh, yes, yes, yes, yes,
I have cleaned your room. And and I just reached
(17:57):
in my pocket. I give her another five and that's it.
It was the longest. Yeah, it was the most expensive
hallway that I run into. But that was so one
of those people is not telling the truth, right, at
least one of them.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
Two of them, maybe, yeah, maybe two of them. Do you.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
I like it when they leave an envelope with their
name on it. I think that's that's a cool thing, right,
And then you can just slip it in there. Yeah, right,
because otherwise you don't know if they're going to come in,
and they don't know if you're coming back and you
just left a twenty there and they don't know whether
to take it or not, right, or sometimes they'll have
a pen and a piece of paper you can write
thank you, Do you write them a note.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Yes I do, I read a little little smiley face.
How you do? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (18:35):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:35):
I really like to bond with the people to clean
the room.
Speaker 2 (18:38):
I write, I thank you, the room looks beautiful. Rockefeller JD.
I give them the old JD. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
But I those people, they're good.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
But the banging on the door when you're sleeping at
eleven thirty when you're supposed to check out at ten thirty,
it's that sometimes drives me crazy.
Speaker 5 (19:08):
Well, when you get the knock on the door and
you open it, it's not them, it's like they're supervisor
somebody else who's dressed in like the business student goes,
excuse me, I just wanted to know what time you
be leaving?
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Yeah, And I purposely frows my hair up and I answer, nude.
Speaker 1 (19:25):
I can help you. We'll be able, we'll come back,
we'll come back. Thanks.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
Yeah, that sends them off. But that's that's great though,
that these uh you know, these are they all retired.
Speaker 5 (19:37):
They've all got it. They've all got a plan, a
retirement plan. That's great.
Speaker 3 (19:40):
Buddy.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
What hotel was it? Nice?
Speaker 5 (19:42):
The Palace Hotel, which I really like and very old school.
That's why I like to everybody get on and then
here's something else. When you tip early, they particularly the
doorman and everybody, they all know your name. When you
come down to the lobby, mister Thompson, good morning. Well
you know, it's like there's just a different vibe. It
feels like home.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
You know. I I heard from you remember John from
the John and Jeff Show. Oh yeah, I think so, the.
Speaker 2 (20:05):
John a Jeff Show. You spy on kalis X. I
learned this from him. He said, when you go to
a crowded bar, like it's five deep around the whole bar.
It's a club or a restaurant, whatever it is, and
you're watching sports, or you know, it's a club at
a disco tech and you're dancing. But when you get
your first beer or your first drink, you pay, you know,
twelve dollars for the drink, and you give him an
(20:27):
additional twenty right there, and you say, hey, here's the
twelve dollars of the drink, and here's a twenty for you.
And he looks at you and he remembers that phase.
And now every time he scans the bar and he
sees your face, he comes right up to you.
Speaker 5 (20:40):
That's exact same conser early tip exact same concept early tip, right.
Speaker 2 (20:44):
Yeah, tip him early, but don't tip him long or
whatever they're saying is tip him early.
Speaker 5 (20:51):
But not like I don't know, but I know what
tip stands for, to ensure prompt service.
Speaker 1 (20:58):
Oh there'll be tips. Yeah, okay that I'd always heard
that on that that's when he gave away to all
those women tips. Yeah, tips to ensure prompts.
Speaker 5 (21:06):
And well the case of the John and Jeff guy,
it worked. In the case of my you know, at
the beginning of my stay, it worked as well.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
That's right. Yeah, all right, Tom. Anyway, very very good
little run through gratuity land.
Speaker 2 (21:20):
There you go, buddy, you are a big tip.
Speaker 4 (21:23):
You're listening to Tim Conway Junior on demand from KF
I am six forty.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
But man, I love cocoa puffs.
Speaker 6 (21:35):
Those your favorites.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
Yeah, the coca puffs.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
But I growing up, I was a huge Frosted Flakes guy.
Speaker 1 (21:42):
Oh yeah, my dad was into that stuff. Is that right?
Speaker 7 (21:45):
Yeah, well, well Raisin brand more than Frosted Flakes, but
they're the same.
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Yeah, I like frosted Flakes.
Speaker 2 (21:50):
And also the fact that you can get them anywhere
wasn't a specialty, you know Cereal that everybody had him.
Do you go back? You and I go back? Uh
steph fush a little too young. But you remember like
going to like a hotel or motel and they had
the little box little boxes and you'd cut open the
box and pour the milk right there.
Speaker 7 (22:09):
With a little perforation, you could open it up and
then you can open up the bag and eat it
all right in that little.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Box, right enough, right, And then the reason it looked
like they tasted better out of that little box, it
was about it. And then the milk leaked all over
you and it was hell after that. Yeah, but I
would say, yeah, that's my frosted flakes.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
Flakes go to cru that is old, that's.
Speaker 2 (22:31):
Right right, Yeah, they were, they were well, I thought
they were really good. Bellio, what is your go to Cereal?
We've never discussed that with you? She in there, No,
she's in the can. Yeah, I think so pushing that Cereal?
Speaker 1 (22:45):
What about you my go to cinnamon toast crunch?
Speaker 7 (22:50):
Okay, I think that's a Yeah, that's the kids the
last fifteen years.
Speaker 6 (22:55):
I would say that's that's definitely grown.
Speaker 2 (22:57):
And one I always forget about which I get randomly
or something someone will have it is life. That's just
a solid because it's just sweet enough and.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
His life is good. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
Yeah, you guys are those flakes too? They're like corn,
kind of almost like porn. It's like the square yeah,
with holes in it. Yeah, but that's also the kind
of cereal you can just eat out.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
Of the box like uh chips. Yeah for sure. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
I always eat cereal dry. I hate when it gets soggy.
I always just eat it dry.
Speaker 1 (23:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (23:23):
Yeah, you eat it fast.
Speaker 1 (23:24):
Man, Yeah, yeah, I can't stand soggy cereal.
Speaker 7 (23:27):
The key is eating just fast enough to where before
they get before they get soggy.
Speaker 6 (23:31):
Yet it still flavors the milk. Oh, you drink the milk.
But one of the best parts are you are you?
Are you insane?
Speaker 1 (23:39):
I have thrown out.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
I can't believe we've ever met that you would drink
that crap.
Speaker 1 (23:44):
After you throw the milk out, oh do you pour
it back in the middle. The milk goes out.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
As soon as the cereal gets soggy, the milk and
the cereal goes away. Everything disappears. Angel, what do you
what's your go to cereal? I don't think we've ever
asked you that in the thirty years i've known you.
Speaker 8 (24:01):
Okay, so I like there's two of them. I like,
I like that cinnamon checks. Yeah, there's one of Trader Joe's.
It's like the strawberry cheerio stuff. I don't know what
they call it. It's like yogurt coated and it's got
strawberry chunks on it, and it's like little cheerio little nuggets.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
It's really good. Trader Jos.
Speaker 2 (24:26):
Yeah, it's probably their versions, probably called like Trader Rose
or something. Oh yeah, probably right right, yeah, Trader Rows.
Speaker 3 (24:32):
You know.
Speaker 8 (24:33):
With the milk, this is what I do. I don't
drink the milk, but I'll put a little bit of
milk inside of in the in the cereal and so
it doesn't get everything too soggy and there's not like
a lot of milk in there. But then once I
eat the cereal, there's usually a little bit of milk left.
I just put a little more cereal in there. Okay,
(24:54):
soak up the milk and then it's gone.
Speaker 1 (24:56):
I don't understand they drinking that milk with all that crap.
Speaker 6 (25:00):
I can't understand how you people.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
Have I'm blocking my ears. I can't even hear you talk.
Speaker 6 (25:04):
By the way strawberry yogurt o's or what they're exactly.
Speaker 1 (25:09):
They're so good. Oh my gosh, they're so good, you guys.
But what a pain in the ass to be on
vacation with.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
Like here, you want the cheerios, you want the frogs
of flakes?
Speaker 1 (25:19):
No, I want this thing.
Speaker 2 (25:21):
I can only find a Trader Joe's christ all right.
Speaker 6 (25:24):
I only want to put so much milk in it.
It's not too dun.
Speaker 7 (25:27):
I don't want to drink the milk and mega.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
Good thing. I packed a box of it.
Speaker 6 (25:37):
Yeah, that sounds right, that's all right.
Speaker 1 (25:41):
I'm glad you asked Trader Joe's.
Speaker 2 (25:43):
As where we'll start, like, oh no, oh my god,
she's with us again.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
Oh you should have left her at home. This one cereal?
Speaker 2 (25:55):
All right, Sharon, what do you got cheerio?
Speaker 1 (26:00):
Really cheerios?
Speaker 6 (26:02):
Yeah, cheerios, you put anything in it.
Speaker 1 (26:04):
They're heart healthy. No they're not. They say they are.
Speaker 8 (26:09):
That's just the commercial buy. It just came out in
the news that cheerio is one of the best cereals.
Speaker 1 (26:15):
You can eat. And what else you do for your health? Peloton,
that's it? What what do you put milking in with
the cereal. I use almond milk. Oh my god, I
am not going on vacation with you and Angel. Yeah,
I use almond milk. Also, I don't use No, you don't,
the two of you. She started it. Somebody, Look, almonds
(26:39):
don't have milk. It's not milk. You can't milk and almonds.
They don't have butters, that's for sure. That's right.
Speaker 6 (26:46):
Apple jacks by the way, Oh oh, apple jacks are good.
That's my one apple jack.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
And can I drink the milk?
Speaker 2 (26:55):
That's that's like a cinnamon milk, you know, the one
I liked. They really had the nerve to go for it.
The title was sugar Smacks. Yeah, they plainly just laid
it out.
Speaker 1 (27:09):
There for you. That's a good song, though, Sugar sugar Smack. Yeah,
a song called sugar smacks.
Speaker 6 (27:15):
Well, smack smacks, sugar smack.
Speaker 1 (27:17):
Oh yeah, yeah, smack you back. Fun to eat the
Delicious Street.
Speaker 6 (27:20):
It's whatever sugar smacks.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
I gotta find that wasn't the on.
Speaker 8 (27:25):
The sugar Smack box. Wasn't that a frog?
Speaker 1 (27:28):
Yes, bear, I thought I thought it was a frog.
Golden Crisps, Yeah, but I think it's a frog. Let's
see the sugar smack song. Oh here it is belly.
I look at you. How about that? What do you
think about my sacks?
Speaker 8 (27:45):
I think we all have to agree.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
You're kind of.
Speaker 6 (27:47):
Weird, very scary, scary looking.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
The part of these are honey smacks.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
It's even before sugar sugar smacks would before honey smacks.
Speaker 3 (27:59):
Kids.
Speaker 2 (28:16):
I don't like kids in in Cereal commercials. They seem
too phony, too fake, those two.
Speaker 8 (28:22):
Because they didn't even sound like they were jacked up
on sugar like they should be after eating funny smacks
or something.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
Here it is value. I think I found it all
right right after this home deepot.
Speaker 2 (28:31):
Commercials reads up writs a letter A look, it's a
green belly.
Speaker 6 (28:38):
Chaps got big smash smell.
Speaker 1 (28:43):
Next, give me a smack and I'll sweat. Is that
the one you're talking about?
Speaker 2 (28:48):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (28:48):
Ding dong, big smash smell. Next, give me a smack
and I'll sweat.
Speaker 6 (28:57):
Fun to eat those hell.
Speaker 1 (29:01):
I wonder if you went to it.
Speaker 2 (29:02):
I wonder if you went to Kellogg's today and said, hey,
I got an idea for a song for Cereal. You
smacked me, and I'll smack you.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
Okay, what is it called. It's called the first Degree
of Salt drink that milk, curious scissor more. No, no,
just two people kicking the crap out of each other done.
Speaker 7 (29:26):
Sugar Smacks used to have a clown as its mascot
or whatever, then eventually changed to the frog, and they
also to be healthier. That's when they switched from sugar
Smacks to honey Smacks.
Speaker 1 (29:36):
Yes, I remember, just like the other one that.
Speaker 7 (29:38):
Was the Bear, that was super sugar cris Wow and
they changed those to Golden cris Wow to get rid
of the sugar aspect.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
Yeah, but that man, they did that early. That was
like one of the first things that flipped, is they
you know they took sugar out of sugar earlier.
Speaker 1 (29:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (29:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:53):
Conway Show on demand on the iHeartRadio app. Now you
can always hear us live on Hey if I Am
six for four to seven pm Monday through Friday, and
anytime on demand on the iHeartRadio app.
It's camp.
Speaker 2 (00:00):
I am sixty and you're listening to the Conway Show
on demand on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
Leno's with us, Jay Leno, How you.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
Bob tem I just enjoying your inspiring rags target story there?
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Yeah, which target story?
Speaker 3 (00:22):
Well, your life story? How you came up and used
to listen to the station. I was thinking of a
kid's day. But you know, you see the McDonald's every day,
and then one day I went to high school, and
then I graduated, and now I worked there. Now I've
been on shakes now for fifteen years, and just think
I started eating here. You know it's I really heard
(00:45):
a person do their own eulogy.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
That's so great. I'm glad you picked up on that.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
I couldn't help. But think of my father. You know
that guy Luigi whatever his name is, shot the guy right,
the most Italian name you could possibly get sure, And
when I was a kid in my every time I
had to my frog, I have a time and plenty
of Italians and untouchable every time the bed and my
dad would read that sorga. He's probably just half a talent.
He's not even all Italian. Guy Italian did something wrong
(01:14):
they're not really Italian, They're just some of those.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
Things, you know, Right, Jay, I got a great idea
for you, and and I don't. I don't want you
to say yes or no right now, but an I
have an opportunity for both of us. All Right, you
have a great car collection, is that true?
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Well have some cars.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
I think you have hundreds of cars. All right, Okay,
I think you could add to it by buying and
displaying the car that I raised my family on, my
two thousand and seven Lincoln Navigator. You can add it
to your collection. Well, I'll make your sweet deal and
then people can come by the when they come buy
the shop, they're like, oh, that's Conway's old car.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
Yeah. I just can't. I just couldn't handle the crowd.
That's fine. I don't have the room, you know. I
just think that would be a huge, huge problem. But yeah, yeah,
that sounds fine. I got that car.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Yeah, I still got the car.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Well, it was not a cheap car. That was like,
when did you buy it? It was last year.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
It was sixty five thousand dollars when I bought it,
and I didn't know how I was going to pay
for it. Back in two thousand and seven.
Speaker 3 (02:19):
Oh okay, but he stated, but Jay, it.
Speaker 1 (02:21):
Was state of the art.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
It was the first one that had navigation, It had
you know, electric everything.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
It was great.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
And then all the other cars passed it. And now it's, uh,
you know, it's it's outdated. I have to buy a
new DVD to update the navigation.
Speaker 3 (02:38):
Well, I actually wasn't the first to have navigation.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
It was the first tithing in my in my group
of friends.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
I think Columbus might argue with that.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
Okay, all right, but Jay, look I had navigation. Nobody
had navigation back then. I had satellite radio built in.
Nobody had that back then.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Nobody.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
Well, that's a life of privilege.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
Yes, that's exactly right.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
You're a baby, and that's right.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
And I had that car for eighteen years. I'm going
to tell you what's wrong with it.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Though.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
Every time I go out to start it, the back
of the car is sitting on the back tires.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
So there must be something wrong with the rear suspension.
Is that right?
Speaker 3 (03:11):
Yeah? I think what you have what's called a flat tire.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Now, the tires are the car, The tires are in
great shape. The car sits on the tires. If it's
if it's you know, it sits long enough. What's the
problem do you think?
Speaker 3 (03:28):
Well, tis slap spot? Maybe just don't have enough You
might not have enough air.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
I'm telling you. The tires are fine. The car comes
down and sits on the tires. Then I started up
and the car comes up off the tires.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
Well it doesn't have an air suspensions.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Yes, yes, it does well air suspensions. Okay, all right,
So is that something you can work on for me
or not?
Speaker 3 (03:49):
You know, I can't do it right now because I'm
on the phone. I'm talking to the on the phone.
I can't do it now. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'd love to. Yeah,
that's it sounds like just the kind of like to
it involved in.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
That is great. I saw you on with Bill Maher
talking and then they're.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Still beating you up over this this accident that you
had in Pittsburgh.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
You know, this is what I love about the press.
It's so stupid.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
It's dumb as hell.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
You know, I'm dyslexic, so I don't Campbell. I go
to Vegas and they go, sir, it's twenty one, you
have twenty eight, what you know. I don't know how
to gamble. I just liked the idea that the mob
would drive to Greensburg, Pennsylvania, wait at the Hampton in
on a rainy day for me to show up and
throw me down the hill. I mean, hilarious, hilarious.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Let me ask you a question.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Do you are you listening to some of these new
comics like this THEO Vaughn, you know who he is.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
I like to call the new comedy. You know, I
like anything I hate more than comics, trash and other comics.
This guy's no good thing, you know, God bless anybody
makes a living. It's a tough business. And if you
can make a living doing it without you know, being
racist and things, you know whatever, good for you. Okay,
So I don't you know, I do like everybody doing
it there. And you have different senses of humor, you know.
(05:07):
I mean I watched the on comics and they're doing
jokes on Vemo, and I'm just gotta know what that
I never use those things. Okay, fine, so it's just different,
but but it doesn't mean it's not funny.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
I love THEO Vaughn, and I think that that he's
like the new Norm McDonald of comedy. I think that,
you know, that he's he's pretty simple. And people always
thought that Norm McDonald wasn't that bright. But I thought
he was the funniest of all.
Speaker 3 (05:34):
Nor McDonald came this close to winning everything on Who
Wants to Be a Millionaire? Oh?
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Is that right?
Speaker 3 (05:41):
He got always he knew everything. He was a smart guy.
He was well read. Wow, and he was really conservative.
People think he's like, you know, the Hollywood liberal. He wasn't.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
I remember when he went on Larry King and he
said to Larry, I'm deeply, deeply I'm a deeply, deeply
closeted homo set actual and Larry King said, oh, so
you're almost actual, because no, Larry, Larry, I'm telling you, Larry, Larry,
what's wrong with you?
Speaker 1 (06:06):
I'm deeply, deeply closet.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
He was funny, David, tell you sorry. He used to
bring his mother to see me.
Speaker 2 (06:15):
All right, hold on, se hold him and say, Jay
Leno was about tell us the greatest story in the
history of the world about nor McDonald's mom going to
see Jay Leno in concert. So hang on, we'll get
to that story.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
You're listening to Tim Conway Junior on demand from KFI
AM six forty.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
Jay Leno is wh us Jay, welcome back to the program.
Speaker 3 (06:39):
Thank you, thank you for talking about Norm McDonald.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
Yeah, so Norm McDonald used to his mom used to
go to your show.
Speaker 3 (06:46):
Yeah, he used to bring his mom to see me
because I work clean so he can take his mom
and see the other comics. So it was funny. But
one day he takes his mom to Vegas. He takes
three thousand dollars out of the bank. They're checking in
at the hotel. He says his mom, I'm gonna go
over here to the table. I'll be right back. He
(07:07):
goes to the table, loses all his money. He can't
even pay for the hotel. Now he loses all the
money that he has. He had three thousand dollars to
treat his mom for the weekend, thinking that would be enough.
And he gets back he goes mine, not any money.
It's so stupid.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
Yeah, so stupid, and he had that's all the money
he had.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Yeah, I mean, great comic, genuine original. You know, there's
some people that are funny because they tell jokes. He
just says things funny a lot of times. It's not
necessarily a joke, it's just the way he says it.
And he uses unusual words and a wiener dog. This
guy's a wiener dog and you're laughing at the name
(07:54):
wiener dog, but he keeps repeating. You know, he's just
really brilliant. He was fascinating to listen to. It got
kind of like almost like a Mark Twain. You know,
you just enjoy hearing him speak.
Speaker 2 (08:04):
When when he was on I think he was on
with Conan O'Brien, and you know, he had a set
that he was going to do, you know, four to
five minutes, and then Conan said, oh, Norm McDonald's going
to stay with us, and Norm McDonald flipped out. He
says during the commercial where he goes, I don't have
anything else. I don't know, you know, when we come
back for another five minutes, I've got nothing. And Conan said, well,
(08:25):
just make something up. And he turned a thirty second
joke into a five minute joke about some kind of
moth or something and was brilliant.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
Oh. I think that's the one about the moss it goes. Yeah,
I remember the Yeah, I remember that story. It was
about a moss goes to the dentist and the whole
thing that that that the final dentist goes, why did
you pick me? And the Moss says, your light was
on and it's a great joke. It's a great joke.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
Yeah, and I really miss him. He used to come
on with us all the time.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
Just one of the nicest guys in the world, never
affected by show business. He was good friends he had,
you know, he had a lot of guys that were friends.
Not necessarily comics, but you know, friends that were just
normal everyday guys.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
Yeah, interesting people, you know, he just he he didn't
have a very good meter for sexist or whatever, you know, Timmy.
It was all just funny. So he would all often
get in trouble.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
Yeah, it was great.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
So I turned my TV on the other day, and
you know, if you have, I don't know what I have.
I think it's a spectrum. But before spectrum comes on,
I have just some kind.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
Of well you we're not talking about an arrow disease. Now,
you're talking about cable that's right, Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
And I have and I and I turned the TV
on and forever they were running Conan reruns, and you know,
so you watch a little of that, then you go
on to cable whatever. And now Letterman has his own
station where it's all his old reruns, which is great
because that's when Letterman was funny.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
Right right, and so was always funny, was always yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:03):
But but nowadays, you know with the this guy needs
no introduction, there's no humor in those things.
Speaker 1 (10:09):
He's a very serious man nowadays.
Speaker 3 (10:11):
This straight interview. That is true.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
But Jay, you never gave up comedy. He did well.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
You know, Dave was never comfortable being a stand up comedian.
Day was a brilliant host and and truly a funny comedian,
but he didn't like the road. I mean one of
the funniest things this was let him in on the
road opening for Tony Orlando. I mean, just the funniest
commedation you can imagine. He was just so uncomfortable because
he was always wildly ironic in his humor and if
(10:43):
you to get that or you don't, I mean he
always made me laugh. I mean since the first time
I saw him. I went up to him and I said,
you know, I love the way you you your great wordsmith.
I like how you weave words together. And he goes,
how could you get up there and just start talking
about being nervous? So we kind of set off each
other you know, he took from me a certain amount
of energy and I took from him. Boy, that's a
(11:04):
really clever way of speaking and talking, you know, So
we really when I would do his show, it's still
my favorite time of my career, just going on and
just let him deliberately try to sidetrack me, and then
I would I would come back, and it was always
it was always just my favorite time in my career
because it wasn't like it wasn't any competition. It was
(11:26):
just another comic and he was the guy with the show,
and it was wonderful. I really enjoyed it. I really
looked back fondly on those days.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
What about What was your relationship with Johnny Carson? Did
you hang with Johnny?
Speaker 3 (11:38):
Well, no, you don't hang with you know, I grew
up in New England, where you know, like to me,
the strangest thing being in California. Oh Jay, these are
my parents Bob and Agnes. Well, how are you miss missus? Mancheli?
I can't call you Bob and Agnes. I'm sorry. You're
my friend's parents. So I would go, well, thank you,
mister Carson. He goes, ditch down you okay, Johnny? I mean,
I just I always I'm with you.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
I'm with you.
Speaker 3 (11:59):
You know, it's it's just a different way of being
brought up. You just people are elders. And so with Johnny,
I couldn't. Never, I couldn't say to Johnny, hey, Johnny,
nice tie pal. You know you can't you can't do that.
But with let him and I could, and that was
it was a fun part.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
I'm the same way.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
I have friends from you know, third grade, you know,
Matt McDaniel, Robbie Fox, Mike Tennessee. And when I when
I run into their parents, I still call them mister
Fox or missus McDaniel and missus Tennessee.
Speaker 1 (12:26):
And I can't stop that.
Speaker 3 (12:28):
Yeah. Well, my own to my own history teacher came
to see me, uh kind of, you know, I guess
to drink. Mister Robson, call me Fred, call me Fred.
I'm not giving. I'm giving a guy named Fred or whiskey. Okay,
you're gonna have a soft drink. Mister. You know you're
my history teacher. I'm sorry, I can't you. Yeah, No,
it's just very very funny. It's fun.
Speaker 1 (12:47):
It's being brought up properly, is what that is.
Speaker 3 (12:49):
By calling somebody that's true, just being you know, when
I was a kid, I used to love the Danny
Thomas Show because Danny Townas was a performer and he
would be at home with a family and then at
night you go out to the club to work and
come home again. I thought, we wouldn't it be great
if you could be a comedian. We're not going out
of town. You could just go to the club, you know,
(13:10):
try out jokes. So when Flapper's open, when the Comedy
Magic Club opening at Rosa Beach, I would say to
my I mean, I'm going to see my agent, Sid Helper,
and I'm going to get out to the club. You
know Sid Helper with Dandy Thomas's agent on the show.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
That's great.
Speaker 3 (13:23):
It always used to make me laugh. I thought, oh god,
I'm living the life I wanted to live when I
was a little kid.
Speaker 1 (13:28):
Yeah, that's awesome, Buddy, break a leg tonight.
Speaker 3 (13:30):
They still say thanks, thanks, good luck and keep, you know,
write a book about that inspiring story about I will.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
All right, thanks Jaylen.
Speaker 4 (13:40):
You're listening to Tim Conway Junior on de Mayo from
kf I am six forty.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
All right, Mark Thompson, very generous man when he goes
on vacation.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
You said you're like a Rockefeller.
Speaker 5 (13:55):
Let me just this, I'm not. I'm just I just
tip an appropriate amount. I'm not something like over tip, but.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
Use the term Rockefeller.
Speaker 5 (14:01):
Well, when I go into a hotel and I'm a
new guest, I'm tipping like a Rockefeller, because.
Speaker 1 (14:06):
What does Rockefeller mean? Well, how much a night?
Speaker 5 (14:09):
It's not that, it's before that even happens. And they
take the bags out of the cab. I give that
guy ten bucks, and then the guy takes the bags
from the cab to the front desk. Give that guy
ten bucks, and the guy from the from the desk
up to the room. He'll get between ten and twenty,
depending on how many.
Speaker 1 (14:25):
Bags we have.
Speaker 5 (14:25):
So I try to, like a rock, take care. Then
I tip the front desk person who's given me the room.
So my point is when I come in, I come
in hot okay, but I'm not you know, for a
normal dinner or something. I'm not like some incredible tipper
at all. But I but when I'm at a hotel,
I've just come back from a hotel. So that's where
this comes from. I always take care of the maid
service people always so between five and twenty every day,
(14:49):
but most of the time it's twenty bucks a day,
no between. Usually it's between five and fifteen. So the
reason it's that is because if I've asked for something,
Hey can I get some extra mouth washed there or
someone like that, and then I'll leave them more, you
know what I mean. So anyway, point is this, we've
been there for three days, all right, This is.
Speaker 1 (15:06):
So she could stand to make fifteen bucks over the
three days.
Speaker 5 (15:09):
Right, five bucks are or more? In this case, I
did leave her. We left her. I think she I'm
going to say she was maybe twice that thirty bucks,
which she's probably not. Okay, so not a big deal.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
We should get a condo in Maui.
Speaker 5 (15:20):
But I'm what I'm saying is that we're compulsed. I'm
compulsive about it, like I really because I think that
they get stiffed a lot.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
She buy a boat.
Speaker 5 (15:26):
So last day we said what time we're leaving my
in court and said don't be out of here by
eleven forty five. Said okay, And so I'm going down
to get a coffee and I see the lady who
cleans the room, and she's right there and she's got
that cart, you know, with all that stuff. And I said, hello,
good morning, Thank you so much. I said, we're going
(15:48):
to be leaving at eleven forty five and want you
to know you'll be able to get into the room.
Then she said, oh, thank you. I said, you've been
taking care of the room every day, You've been cleaning it.
She said yes, I said every day you've been cleaning it,
she said, on this ship. So I gave her a
five in addition to the money we're going to leave
her at the end. I gave her a five kind
of person. She said, oh, thank you very very much.
So that's my point. It's not and it's not like
(16:09):
a lot of money, but the point is I let
to let it fly. I walk about fifteen feet and
there's another lady there with a cleaning cart, another five,
and she asks me when will you be leaving the room? Ah,
tag team, And I said'll be leaving at eleven forty five.
I said, have you been taking care of the room
every day? She said yes, I'm taking care of it
(16:32):
every day. I said no, but are you the person
who's actually taking care of it? Because she spoke English
better than the first lady.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
Right, But I would say, before we continue, do you
think the Rockefellers ever had this conversation?
Speaker 5 (16:43):
Okay, you know what, I shouldn't have mentioned the Rockefellers.
You're going to let the Rockefelders go. Okay, you know, really,
you can kill a story like nobody else. What is
your problem? So then I why can't you do what
I do for you, which is just sit there and laugh?
Speaker 1 (16:58):
Did you make her crawl on her hands and you
take it in the end of the store. You got
to kill my store.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
It's not that great to begin with, all right, So
you got the two ladies fighting for the five.
Speaker 5 (17:08):
So then she says, I said, oh, I thought that
lady was the lady who cleaned the room. She said, no, no, no, no,
I've been cleaning the room every day. Said no, I'm thinking, oh,
I just blew away five bucks on that last lady,
and now I'm going to blow and noe. And so
I reach in, I get a five and I give
her the five dollars. But I said, thank you very
mu much. I said, we left a little bit more
behind for you. And then I am at the elevators
(17:32):
about to about to turn the corner. With the other
and there's a third time. No, I swear it. Oh
my god, incredible. She's got a cart just like the
other two ladies. And I said, we're at the We're
at the corner. She said hello, She initiated, she said
good morning. I said hello. I said, we're going to
be We're at the end of the hole. She says, oh, yes, yes, yes, yes,
I have cleaned your room. And and I just reached
(17:57):
in my pocket. I give her another five and that's it.
It was the longest. Yeah, it was the most expensive
hallway that I run into. But that was so one
of those people is not telling the truth, right, at
least one of them.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
Two of them, maybe, yeah, maybe two of them. Do you.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
I like it when they leave an envelope with their
name on it. I think that's that's a cool thing, right,
And then you can just slip it in there. Yeah, right,
because otherwise you don't know if they're going to come in,
and they don't know if you're coming back and you
just left a twenty there and they don't know whether
to take it or not, right, or sometimes they'll have
a pen and a piece of paper you can write
thank you, Do you write them a note.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Yes I do, I read a little little smiley face.
How you do? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (18:35):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:35):
I really like to bond with the people to clean
the room.
Speaker 2 (18:38):
I write, I thank you, the room looks beautiful. Rockefeller JD.
I give them the old JD. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
But I those people, they're good.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
But the banging on the door when you're sleeping at
eleven thirty when you're supposed to check out at ten thirty,
it's that sometimes drives me crazy.
Speaker 5 (19:08):
Well, when you get the knock on the door and
you open it, it's not them, it's like they're supervisor
somebody else who's dressed in like the business student goes,
excuse me, I just wanted to know what time you
be leaving?
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Yeah, And I purposely frows my hair up and I answer, nude.
Speaker 1 (19:25):
I can help you. We'll be able, we'll come back,
we'll come back. Thanks.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
Yeah, that sends them off. But that's that's great though,
that these uh you know, these are they all retired.
Speaker 5 (19:37):
They've all got it. They've all got a plan, a
retirement plan. That's great.
Speaker 3 (19:40):
Buddy.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
What hotel was it? Nice?
Speaker 5 (19:42):
The Palace Hotel, which I really like and very old school.
That's why I like to everybody get on and then
here's something else. When you tip early, they particularly the
doorman and everybody, they all know your name. When you
come down to the lobby, mister Thompson, good morning. Well
you know, it's like there's just a different vibe. It
feels like home.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
You know. I I heard from you remember John from
the John and Jeff Show. Oh yeah, I think so, the.
Speaker 2 (20:05):
John a Jeff Show. You spy on kalis X. I
learned this from him. He said, when you go to
a crowded bar, like it's five deep around the whole bar.
It's a club or a restaurant, whatever it is, and
you're watching sports, or you know, it's a club at
a disco tech and you're dancing. But when you get
your first beer or your first drink, you pay, you know,
twelve dollars for the drink, and you give him an
(20:27):
additional twenty right there, and you say, hey, here's the
twelve dollars of the drink, and here's a twenty for you.
And he looks at you and he remembers that phase.
And now every time he scans the bar and he
sees your face, he comes right up to you.
Speaker 5 (20:40):
That's exact same conser early tip exact same concept early tip, right.
Speaker 2 (20:44):
Yeah, tip him early, but don't tip him long or
whatever they're saying is tip him early.
Speaker 5 (20:51):
But not like I don't know, but I know what
tip stands for, to ensure prompt service.
Speaker 1 (20:58):
Oh there'll be tips. Yeah, okay that I'd always heard
that on that that's when he gave away to all
those women tips. Yeah, tips to ensure prompts.
Speaker 5 (21:06):
And well the case of the John and Jeff guy,
it worked. In the case of my you know, at
the beginning of my stay, it worked as well.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
That's right. Yeah, all right, Tom. Anyway, very very good
little run through gratuity land.
Speaker 2 (21:20):
There you go, buddy, you are a big tip.
Speaker 4 (21:23):
You're listening to Tim Conway Junior on demand from KF
I am six forty.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
But man, I love cocoa puffs.
Speaker 6 (21:35):
Those your favorites.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
Yeah, the coca puffs.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
But I growing up, I was a huge Frosted Flakes guy.
Speaker 1 (21:42):
Oh yeah, my dad was into that stuff. Is that right?
Speaker 7 (21:45):
Yeah, well, well Raisin brand more than Frosted Flakes, but
they're the same.
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Yeah, I like frosted Flakes.
Speaker 2 (21:50):
And also the fact that you can get them anywhere
wasn't a specialty, you know Cereal that everybody had him.
Do you go back? You and I go back? Uh
steph fush a little too young. But you remember like
going to like a hotel or motel and they had
the little box little boxes and you'd cut open the
box and pour the milk right there.
Speaker 7 (22:09):
With a little perforation, you could open it up and
then you can open up the bag and eat it
all right in that little.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Box, right enough, right, And then the reason it looked
like they tasted better out of that little box, it
was about it. And then the milk leaked all over
you and it was hell after that. Yeah, but I
would say, yeah, that's my frosted flakes.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
Flakes go to cru that is old, that's.
Speaker 2 (22:31):
Right right, Yeah, they were, they were well, I thought
they were really good. Bellio, what is your go to Cereal?
We've never discussed that with you? She in there, No,
she's in the can. Yeah, I think so pushing that Cereal?
Speaker 1 (22:45):
What about you my go to cinnamon toast crunch?
Speaker 7 (22:50):
Okay, I think that's a Yeah, that's the kids the
last fifteen years.
Speaker 6 (22:55):
I would say that's that's definitely grown.
Speaker 2 (22:57):
And one I always forget about which I get randomly
or something someone will have it is life. That's just
a solid because it's just sweet enough and.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
His life is good. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
Yeah, you guys are those flakes too? They're like corn,
kind of almost like porn. It's like the square yeah,
with holes in it. Yeah, but that's also the kind
of cereal you can just eat out.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
Of the box like uh chips. Yeah for sure. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
I always eat cereal dry. I hate when it gets soggy.
I always just eat it dry.
Speaker 1 (23:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (23:23):
Yeah, you eat it fast.
Speaker 1 (23:24):
Man, Yeah, yeah, I can't stand soggy cereal.
Speaker 7 (23:27):
The key is eating just fast enough to where before
they get before they get soggy.
Speaker 6 (23:31):
Yet it still flavors the milk. Oh, you drink the milk.
But one of the best parts are you are you?
Are you insane?
Speaker 1 (23:39):
I have thrown out.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
I can't believe we've ever met that you would drink
that crap.
Speaker 1 (23:44):
After you throw the milk out, oh do you pour
it back in the middle. The milk goes out.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
As soon as the cereal gets soggy, the milk and
the cereal goes away. Everything disappears. Angel, what do you
what's your go to cereal? I don't think we've ever
asked you that in the thirty years i've known you.
Speaker 8 (24:01):
Okay, so I like there's two of them. I like,
I like that cinnamon checks. Yeah, there's one of Trader Joe's.
It's like the strawberry cheerio stuff. I don't know what
they call it. It's like yogurt coated and it's got
strawberry chunks on it, and it's like little cheerio little nuggets.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
It's really good. Trader Jos.
Speaker 2 (24:26):
Yeah, it's probably their versions, probably called like Trader Rose
or something. Oh yeah, probably right right, yeah, Trader Rows.
Speaker 3 (24:32):
You know.
Speaker 8 (24:33):
With the milk, this is what I do. I don't
drink the milk, but I'll put a little bit of
milk inside of in the in the cereal and so
it doesn't get everything too soggy and there's not like
a lot of milk in there. But then once I
eat the cereal, there's usually a little bit of milk left.
I just put a little more cereal in there. Okay,
(24:54):
soak up the milk and then it's gone.
Speaker 1 (24:56):
I don't understand they drinking that milk with all that crap.
Speaker 6 (25:00):
I can't understand how you people.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
Have I'm blocking my ears. I can't even hear you talk.
Speaker 6 (25:04):
By the way strawberry yogurt o's or what they're exactly.
Speaker 1 (25:09):
They're so good. Oh my gosh, they're so good, you guys.
But what a pain in the ass to be on
vacation with.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
Like here, you want the cheerios, you want the frogs
of flakes?
Speaker 1 (25:19):
No, I want this thing.
Speaker 2 (25:21):
I can only find a Trader Joe's christ all right.
Speaker 6 (25:24):
I only want to put so much milk in it.
It's not too dun.
Speaker 7 (25:27):
I don't want to drink the milk and mega.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
Good thing. I packed a box of it.
Speaker 6 (25:37):
Yeah, that sounds right, that's all right.
Speaker 1 (25:41):
I'm glad you asked Trader Joe's.
Speaker 2 (25:43):
As where we'll start, like, oh no, oh my god,
she's with us again.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
Oh you should have left her at home. This one cereal?
Speaker 2 (25:55):
All right, Sharon, what do you got cheerio?
Speaker 1 (26:00):
Really cheerios?
Speaker 6 (26:02):
Yeah, cheerios, you put anything in it.
Speaker 1 (26:04):
They're heart healthy. No they're not. They say they are.
Speaker 8 (26:09):
That's just the commercial buy. It just came out in
the news that cheerio is one of the best cereals.
Speaker 1 (26:15):
You can eat. And what else you do for your health? Peloton,
that's it? What what do you put milking in with
the cereal. I use almond milk. Oh my god, I
am not going on vacation with you and Angel. Yeah,
I use almond milk. Also, I don't use No, you don't,
the two of you. She started it. Somebody, Look, almonds
(26:39):
don't have milk. It's not milk. You can't milk and almonds.
They don't have butters, that's for sure. That's right.
Speaker 6 (26:46):
Apple jacks by the way, Oh oh, apple jacks are good.
That's my one apple jack.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
And can I drink the milk?
Speaker 2 (26:55):
That's that's like a cinnamon milk, you know, the one
I liked. They really had the nerve to go for it.
The title was sugar Smacks. Yeah, they plainly just laid
it out.
Speaker 1 (27:09):
There for you. That's a good song, though, Sugar sugar Smack. Yeah,
a song called sugar smacks.
Speaker 6 (27:15):
Well, smack smacks, sugar smack.
Speaker 1 (27:17):
Oh yeah, yeah, smack you back. Fun to eat the
Delicious Street.
Speaker 6 (27:20):
It's whatever sugar smacks.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
I gotta find that wasn't the on.
Speaker 8 (27:25):
The sugar Smack box. Wasn't that a frog?
Speaker 1 (27:28):
Yes, bear, I thought I thought it was a frog.
Golden Crisps, Yeah, but I think it's a frog. Let's
see the sugar smack song. Oh here it is belly.
I look at you. How about that? What do you
think about my sacks?
Speaker 8 (27:45):
I think we all have to agree.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
You're kind of.
Speaker 6 (27:47):
Weird, very scary, scary looking.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
The part of these are honey smacks.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
It's even before sugar sugar smacks would before honey smacks.
Speaker 3 (27:59):
Kids.
Speaker 2 (28:16):
I don't like kids in in Cereal commercials. They seem
too phony, too fake, those two.
Speaker 8 (28:22):
Because they didn't even sound like they were jacked up
on sugar like they should be after eating funny smacks
or something.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
Here it is value. I think I found it all
right right after this home deepot.
Speaker 2 (28:31):
Commercials reads up writs a letter A look, it's a
green belly.
Speaker 6 (28:38):
Chaps got big smash smell.
Speaker 1 (28:43):
Next, give me a smack and I'll sweat. Is that
the one you're talking about?
Speaker 2 (28:48):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (28:48):
Ding dong, big smash smell. Next, give me a smack
and I'll sweat.
Speaker 6 (28:57):
Fun to eat those hell.
Speaker 1 (29:01):
I wonder if you went to it.
Speaker 2 (29:02):
I wonder if you went to Kellogg's today and said, hey,
I got an idea for a song for Cereal. You
smacked me, and I'll smack you.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
Okay, what is it called. It's called the first Degree
of Salt drink that milk, curious scissor more. No, no,
just two people kicking the crap out of each other done.
Speaker 7 (29:26):
Sugar Smacks used to have a clown as its mascot
or whatever, then eventually changed to the frog, and they
also to be healthier. That's when they switched from sugar
Smacks to honey Smacks.
Speaker 1 (29:36):
Yes, I remember, just like the other one that.
Speaker 7 (29:38):
Was the Bear, that was super sugar cris Wow and
they changed those to Golden cris Wow to get rid
of the sugar aspect.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
Yeah, but that man, they did that early. That was
like one of the first things that flipped, is they
you know they took sugar out of sugar earlier.
Speaker 1 (29:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (29:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:53):
Conway Show on demand on the iHeartRadio app. Now you
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