September 5, 2025 ⢠29 mins
From side-splitting Conway crew banter to unforgettable interviews, this bonus track roundup delivers the funniest and most fascinating highlights.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's k if I Am six forty and you're listening
to the Conway Show on demand on the iHeartRadio app.
Thank go on, Timmy. Timmy, he's a liptos.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
He's always having such a lot of.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
With a lot too, Erica, k if I am at
six forty is Conway Show, Frank Caliendo's whether it's Frank?
Speaker 2 (00:38):
How are you?
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Sir?
Speaker 2 (00:39):
I am doing a fantastically average How's that?
Speaker 1 (00:43):
That is great?
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Man?
Speaker 1 (00:43):
What I treat this as I'm a major, major fan
and I and I rarely get excited when we have
guests on the show. We're on from six to ten PM,
and I always tell Belly Oak if you can please
book most guests for like ten after ten and uh,
And I guess people find that offensive, but.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
What the hell?
Speaker 1 (01:02):
But I loved watching you on on Fox over there
with you know the guys on his Sunday Morning because
it was you know, watching you know five guys talk
about football is great. But when there's humor involved, then
that means you add a whole new element, a whole
new audience.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Yeah. But it's the the thing about those tape sketches.
And I was there for nine years. Wow. Yeah, and
I think it changed last year, but Wriggle Robriggle was
there for like maybe nine ten years after that, so
and Kimmel was there before. But the tough thing is
that most of the funny stuff that happens on the
set between Terry Bradshaw and those guys is mistakes, right,
(01:39):
something goes wrong to is like, I can't believe I
just screwed up my own name again, Tara Bardshaw.
Speaker 3 (01:44):
That's I get myself confused with the William Shakespeare. You know,
the Bard. This is the Bard's And here's a Bard's tale.
My grandpapa used to clean up my bathroom.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
You know, dear, what are you been talking about? But
we would be on I would be on tape, and
you're on tape. Sometimes you just know it's not going
to be a good one. You know, You're you're waiting
for the afterward, and uh, you know how they're gonna
are are they going to react? So it became this
thing where Terry Bradshaw would have a catchphrase and his
catchphrase was not fun at funk. And it was as
(02:17):
though Simon coll On American Idol couldn't come up with
an analogy. You know, it's like not.
Speaker 3 (02:22):
Fun and not fun and not fun and not n
ot if you and wad not fun at Frank.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
So yeah, it was. It was great because then you're
you know, I was always around Hall of Fame Fame
football players and stuff like that.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
So but didn't even get pissed off. I mean, because
you know, sometimes the impression I would think either Madden
or Bradshaw would be the most likely to go this
is this is done?
Speaker 2 (02:50):
Yeah. Well, Terry I think used to get upset about
at the beginning a little bit. You know, he had
to put up with Kimmel and they kim would just
crush those guys. The thing about Jimmy is he you know,
he was adversarial. He I was cherubic, you know, I
had the chubby cheeks, and that would make it work
a little bit that I was just you know, I
looked like Cartmans in South Park doing you know, impressions
pretty good now and Jorge w you know, so that
(03:14):
stuff always kind of worked. But you know they told
Terry it's like wrestling. He's like, oh, does that mean
I'm going to wear a big hat? And by this
land people know you're gonna You're just it's a joke
where you're messing with each other. So Madden didn't like
me for a while, but I made him I talk
about this and you just talk to my act that
I made his grandkids laugh and it was like a
light bulb one over his head, Like I guess now
(03:34):
you know that that kind of a thing. Then when
I went to ESPN, you know Gruden. Gruden didn't know
how to take me. And I met him finally he's like, sill,
you're the guy thugs like me, huh. I'm like how'd
you figure that out?
Speaker 1 (03:47):
Man?
Speaker 2 (03:48):
He's like, where are you from? And I googled where
he was from? So I said that I was like
saying dusky high and he's like really, I'm like no.
He's like good because you were blowing my mind.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
Man.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
But I've become friends with Gruden. Now he'll text it,
you know, that's great. Yeah. He would text me at
like it's so funny. He would text me at like
three in the morning, wow, which is like lunchtime for him, right,
like I gotta get up? What time? I asked it
one time? What time you go bed? That's seven o'clock PM? Wow.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
So but I love I spent especially love the Madden
stuff that you did around Thanksgiving with the buffet and
all the fun.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
Oh you love that, because I got sick of it
after about the twelfth time. I go, hey, stuff and
chicken and to induct him to some other animal. And
let's see what kind of word we can make up here. Yeah. Yeah,
people always I mean people always like people still you know,
people still't bring that up to me.
Speaker 4 (04:39):
Now.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
It's kind of funny about how it was great.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Now, So you grew up in Wisconsin. Were mom and
dad not in favor of you trying to get into
show biz?
Speaker 2 (04:47):
No, my dad was a minor league baseball player, so
and so he knew, you know you kind of I
didn't know what I was gonna do. My dad didn't
care like grades in our house were int seeing because
my dad was say, hey, I got c's nothing wrong
with a C. You know, that's that's not that's nothing
like you know some of the kids I knew, like
if they didn't get a's they get swatted at or
(05:09):
something like that. My Dad's like, hey, he's good, he's average.
You could be average. You do a lot with average,
you know what.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
My dad was the same way my mom was a
little you know, a stickler for grades. But my dad
was like, look, you know, my my dad in high
school had like a C minus or D plus, uh,
you know, average. And he says, he goes, look at
the house I got.
Speaker 5 (05:29):
You know.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I mean there's true that if you listen to people
like Gary Vee and stuff like that, they'll tell you that,
you know, school isn't set up to be uh, you
know for the entrepreneurs and people who are going to
be you know, outside the bus. I have a funny
story about your your dad. Uh was that right? Yeah,
the I was doing Hot in Cleveland. I was guest
(05:51):
starring on Hot in Cleveland. Steve Lawrence was on, you know,
Betty White was there, and Hillary Burtonelli he was, you know,
part of the cast and all that stuff. And there
were some other people on as well. And Uh, I'm
going I'm leaving to go out the door, and there's
a guy. There's a doorman. There's never been a doorman
at the stage of the whole week. There's a doorman.
He's maybe five five or something like that. I'm like,
(06:12):
this is what's going on here? And he's kind of
acting really slow, like God, the guy looks like Tim Conway,
and I go it is Tim Connor. I'm like, what
do you do? And he would not acknowledge that hat
who he was. He was like, I have no idea.
I have no idea what you're talking. I think he
was there to watch Steve Allen, right or not not
Steve Allen. It was yes, Steve and Edy, Steve Lawrence. Yeah,
(06:34):
Steve Lawrence. So he was there to watch him, but
it was oh, yeah, it was. He was totally in character,
didn't break character, and some people didn't know. They're just like,
who's what's with the doorman. I'm like, I have no idea.
He's a familiar face, but I imagined him being a shorter.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
Yeah, he's that. That skippy character was great when he
played you know, the Old Man with Harvey Korman and
Harvey's you know mansion was on fire and he had
to break into the you know, the first story window
to get into him. It was great. And if you
ever go back and look at that sketch, none of
that stuff was rehearsed. Where he had to give him
mouth to mouth resuscitation, he puts his armed arm under
(07:11):
him and he says to Harvey, so what time do
you get on.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
It?
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Really it was a lot of fun. But my dad
was also a big fan. He loved the impressions and
he always said to me, you know, he said, he goes,
this guy is great because he doesn't rely on five
impressions and then just calls it a career. You update
him all the time, because a lot of guys that
do impressions and they get five or six great ones
and then they fall back on that and they don't
(07:37):
do any more work. But every time somebody I turn
on YouTube, you got another one.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Yeah. I mean I did get stuck for a while.
I'll be honest with you. There was a time where
I just I kind of gave up and was But
now you know, with all these Avengers movies and stuff
like that. But people, it's interesting because you find people
like I was doing a thing where I show people
how some impressions are very similar. So if you did,
you could you could start with Robert Jenny Junior, do
(08:04):
me a favor. And here's the thing with Robert Jowny Junior.
If you did his cadence, it's one, two, three, four, five,
sixt seven. Okay, But if you go like Robert junior.
If you take Robert Jenny Junior, you start to slow
him down, he becomes doctor Evil.
Speaker 5 (08:18):
And then if you do this and you add some
airing this, it becomes Donald Trump. Quite frankly, probably there's
a lot of people who say a tremendous amount of
things and throw me a freaking bone here.
Speaker 1 (08:29):
Please have you met Trump?
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Yeah? I did a sketch with him ten fifteen, probably
fifteen years ago.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Oh, that's great.
Speaker 5 (08:36):
It was like the jokes where I decided to run
for president. Now I've decided to not run for president.
Now I've decided to not not run for president. Now
I'm not not not running for president.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
That's well. And you're the only guy I know that
does Norm McDonald. Nobody else does n't.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
I though a lot of people do him. Norm just
doesn't like anybody except for me because years ago I
used to I kind of used to do Norm like right,
like every but hey would do it you know that, Yeah,
everybody do it like that. But you know it's actually
down a little deeper like this. You know you ever
been to the The thing about Norm McDonald is this,
this is the observation from him, because he's a brilliant
(09:11):
writer people. Not everybody knows how brilliant he is in
terms of writing, because his cadence and just being himself
can carry it as well. Sure, uh but he'll he'll
make you laugh on words that are so normal and
you're like, why am I laughing? There's no joke here,
it's just the words that'd be Like you ever been
to yeah, yeah, tim, you ever been to the you know,
(09:32):
the the grocery store. Why is that so funny? Why
it's the grocery store? Yeah, it was at the So
I was over there at the grocery store. You ever
been to Aisle five? Aisle five? As where those eyes are?
They got the they got the toothpick on a hot dog?
Speaker 4 (09:49):
So hey, what you do?
Speaker 2 (09:51):
And I'm spearfishing with processed meat?
Speaker 4 (09:55):
You know?
Speaker 1 (09:58):
He is great brilli. Every single comedian who you ask,
even like you know, Letterman and Lenno and all those guys,
when you when you press him on who's the funniest
you know outside of themselves, it's all it's always uh
Norm MacDonald doing stand up. For some reason, he connects
with all those guys.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
Because he has no fear and he just does and
he he will just go out there and he'll take
every day things that nobody else could make funny. But
he sent out a tweet he goes Usually impressionists are
the most unfunny human beings in the world. But an
exception is the Great Frank Calliando, who is the only
(10:38):
guy on earth that I think does me. And then
all every comedian on earth was texting me and message.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
Hey hold him one sec. Frank Kell, this is great man.
What is a huge treat for me? And we'll continue
with him. You're listening to Tim Conway Junior on demand from.
Speaker 2 (10:59):
Kf I.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
Frank kellandos with us Frank kellendo dot com, where the
schedule is of his appearances coming up. Frank, When you
play like the hard rock hotel and casino after the
show's over, do you ever hit the tables?
Speaker 2 (11:14):
No? Not really. Yeah, I gotta go hide. I'm one
of those. But I should tell people that I do,
because then that's probably advertising for them. Right.
Speaker 1 (11:22):
I was in Vegas. My dad was playing at the
Hilton in Vegas and we were both there with He
was with his wife, my stepmother, and I was with
my wife and we're just having, you know, an afternoon snack.
He was gonna do the show that night, and like
at four o'clock he said, I'm gonna go take a
shower and you know, head to the addressing room. I said,
all right, I'm gonna go to the men's room. I'll
(11:43):
see you down there at six thirty or so. And
about three minutes later, I look across the crabs table
from me and it's my dad. We both bsd our
wives and ended up at the same crab table.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
That's awesome.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
It was great.
Speaker 5 (11:59):
Man.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
It's like father likes then we both also lie to
our same doctor. Right, But I love the uh like
when when you come out. I mean, first of all,
when when you do your show it never stops. I
don't know how you do it, but it seems like,
you know, you never repeat an impression and it all
is funny and the audience absolutely loves it.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
Yeah, you know, I end up talking to myself. That's
the thing that's different about me, is I end up creating.
Like what I do is I set up how the
person thinks in my mind. So like a person like
al Pacino. He's an actor, right, So in acting, they
teach you to be curious because you know what the
next line is. But you have to be curious, so
you don't really know what the next line is, but
(12:40):
be curious of what the person's going to say and
have the feeling that you've never heard it before. And
Pacino does that so amazingly that you know, you could
turn on a light switch and he'd be amazed by that,
be like whoa wait a second, I mean you flip
a switch over there and goes over here. This is sorcery.
How does it get done? I don't get it? So yeah,
(13:03):
it's like, what's the point? Who is the person like
or the formula of the person?
Speaker 4 (13:08):
You know.
Speaker 2 (13:08):
Another one is like Jeff Goeblm, I've done this forever,
like it commits to something one hundred percent and then
to a complete winnie, like what's your favorite food? I
like hot dogs. They very good. Like hot dogs, mister catch,
Chili dogs are good. Cheese dogs are better. Wait wait
a second, I'm a vegetarian. And Goblm is one of
those guys that he doesn't use SI. There's like not
(13:30):
really any silence. He fills it with a sound, so
a lot of people would pause and like his pauses
are in the middle in between words. I'm filling it
with jazz. Good it Scott that I'm a scattering I asked,
not scattered brain, I'm a scat, A jazz scat guy.
Speaker 1 (13:50):
Hey, dude, do you ever like, uh, you know back,
you know, twenty years ago. You know you can do
things and you know they cancel culture that you know
the mob wouldn't be after you. But do ye now
have to watch what you say sometimes on stage?
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Yeah, because I'm and I haven't been on as much.
I mean, I I'm I always worry about that stuff
because I'm somebody who's kind of for everybody. But I'm
finding that it's a weird thing where I don't know.
I don't want to be labeled anything either. That's the
that's the difficult thing. I don't want to be put
in a box because I'm kind of a middle of
the road person and nowadays that's weird to people like,
(14:24):
oh my gosh, you were you're in the center, You're evil. No,
I'm just saying I can see different sides of things.
You know, you can't see different sides, and that's their problem.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
I know, you gotta be on one team or the other.
Speaker 2 (14:36):
I remember talking to Dane. It was Dane Cook and
Harlan Williams in Montreal, and I don't remember why I remember,
probably because Harlan Williams was.
Speaker 4 (14:43):
The Hi buddy, will you kind of get around to
Harlan Williams impression my front, But I don't remember who
said it, and that's why I set up it was
like three different comedians, but it was that. It was
that Don Rickles would just breathe out on the punk line.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
It didn't matter what he was saying. He would say.
He'd be like, hey, there your baseball bat? And what's he?
What's he? Actually? Is there anything? That's because he would
say things certain times you're like, is that even I
don't know, is that something you're not supposed to say?
But because it's Don looking like PC, Don Rickles like,
you know, hey they're generic guy, who I you know what?
Speaker 1 (15:24):
That's good? That is awesome. Well, buddy, I really enjoyed
you coming on and thanks for the uh uh the
the I guess we met you through uh social media here,
but well you.
Speaker 2 (15:35):
Know I was on I was on one of your
shows years and years ago. You don't remember, yeah, KALs X, right, yeah,
I was on there because I was like I remember
because you got on me. You were ripping me. It
was fun and in fun kind of that's what you said,
but it was I was like, I'm not really good
at improv, and you're like, well, that's kind of what
we're going to be doing for the next twenty minutes.
I'm like, yeah, I can improv with myself, but I'm
(15:57):
not good at the form of improv like a groundlings
or something like that, and you're just like, that's not
gonna go. So well, that's great.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
I think I was well for the first I think
six years I was doing this. I was so high.
I was highac kite. I don't remember anything or anybody
that to actually walked through the door.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
I had fun. I was fun, and buddy, look much
better than this.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
Anytime you know you're in town, please, we'll, we'll, we'll,
we'll do nothing but talk about the show, buddy. Frank,
I really appreciate coming on anytime you got an open invitation,
anytime you're in town. Will just give you more publicity
than you could imagine.
Speaker 2 (16:33):
Awesome, see you tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
All right, thanks, Okay, all right, Frank Caliendo. I go
to the website Frankkaaliendo dot com. That's C. A. L
I E N d O. The greatest impression is in
the world. Man, that is awesome.
Speaker 6 (16:46):
That's one of those guys that I have. If I
wished I could have done something like with my voice
because I love doing voices of people, right, that's that's
the type of stuff that I would have loved to
have had.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
Yeah, but you should. You could still do it.
Speaker 2 (16:58):
I mean you're young.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
I know I wouldn't.
Speaker 6 (17:00):
My whole issue has been like I don't even know
where to where to begin to who to go to?
And yeah, you know what's funny because he talked about it,
he touched on a little bit and break is h
He talked about how sometimes you do impressions of people
and they don't they don't get.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
You know that. It's all.
Speaker 6 (17:16):
It's not meant to be mean or denigrading in any way.
It's it truly is when I feel like I can
touch on somebody's voice or some little mannerism that they
have to me, it's it's a high compliment.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
It's great.
Speaker 6 (17:28):
Yeah, it's it's an honor for me to do somebody's
voice because I only do unique voices.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
Right aspects of people's all right, Frank call Leander that
was awesome. Thanks Belly on Giant Stude, you get the
little microphone on your helmet. Yeah, you're listening to Tim
Conway Junior on demand from KFI AM six forty.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
You know David Spade to your friends with him, I'm
not friends with him. I've met him before years ago.
He and Kevin Farley stopped by a show when I
was on TBS. They were coming by when we were
let's taping something.
Speaker 1 (18:00):
Yeah, but uh, I mean with Spade, I mean, you know,
they're very Rarely do comedians get funner, funnier as they
get older. I can't think of any right, but he's
one of those guys that, like the last five or
six years, has gotten funnier than he was when he
was younger.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Yeah, I think, you know, I think sometimes you just
get used to him and we, I mean we as
audience members change two. You know, you start, you evolve
as an audience member and watch how people do things,
and again, sometimes people just have they they get more
and more fearless. And that's like what we're talking about
before with Norm McDonald. People enjoy that type of stuff
(18:36):
and it's refreshing and you don't see it.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
That much yeah, and Norm McDonald the whole thing he
did with you know, he was told to back off
the O. J. Simpson jokes and then he turned it
up to one hundred.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, because you know what, uh, you know
what OJ did there? Right? You ever see that? You
ever see that? Yeah? Then he then he wrote a
book you know what I would have done? Yeah, that's
a good idea. Hey yeah, yeah, he als. I read
another book. I've got a knife and I'm bored.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
He's unbelievable. Hey, now listen when you go to do
these shows, I'm sure that people yelling out all the time.
Like we even had some guy textas just now saying
you're Brett Farv. First of all, nobody else does Brett Farb.
And he said, if Frank does Brett Farv on your show,
he's gonna eat his own s.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
Well, I don't even I don't do it. Brett Favre,
it's just Madden that used to talk about Brett Favre.
I love Brett far I mean Brett farre brunt. One
time I did that with Brett Favre standing next to me.
I'm just going Brett far Brett far but far far
bred far Bret Farv and I moved the camera over
to me. He's just going, oh no, not more of this.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
Hey, you must have been young when you are on
Mad TV.
Speaker 2 (19:48):
Huh probably twenty five. Oh man, let's see, I'm forty
seven now. Probably in my mid twenties something like that.
Speaker 1 (19:55):
What was the big break for you?
Speaker 2 (19:58):
Uh? In terms, my career is always like little things
that happened. I went to I went to LA. When
I first went to LA, I got offered a bunch
of development deals because I would do like fifty impressions
in two minutes and nobody was I was doing odd
ones like Craig Kilbourn, like Kelbay. Oh yeah, you had
a lot of may and totyddshit. I was doing weird
(20:18):
things like that that they're like, who is this guy?
So then I got a show for the WB. Uh.
You know, your show's not going well with the whole
the whole night was name. It was called Hype was
the name of the show, and it was the first
two weeks were Hype Night on the WB. Three weeks
later the WB Sunday. You know you're getting canceled, So
(20:41):
we did that. I did that. Then I went over
to Mad TV. They put me on that for a while,
and uh, that's when I got the NFL on Fox
stuff and I really kind of that's why I started
concentrating on the sports stuff because there was making so
much money doing it. And the thing about analysts and
sports people is what do they do? They break down sports,
and you just take that fish out of water and
(21:02):
have them break things down in real life and all
of a sudden, it's you know, it's it's it's great.
That's where the comedy comes from.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
Did did Lauren Michael's ever call you? I'm sure you
you know you know.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
I I went. When I first went to l A,
there was a there was a tent, you know, like
a a president of NSBC who was only there for
like a month or something. He's like, you want us
to put you on Saturday Night Live. I was like,
it would be an option. And then my managers after
we left, the manager at the time after we left
the the meeting was like, why did you say it
(21:36):
would only be an option? I'm like, because you told
me never to show my cards, just like yeo. But
but I always made I would always make people because
I would go into I would go into a meeting.
But I would go into meetings with like executives and
I would just be myself. I wouldn't pander, and I
wouldn't just try and put on a pretend professional. I'd
(21:58):
just be myself. And it was fifty to fifty. Sometimes
it would just crush in the room and people are like,
oh my god, I can't believe he talks to people
like this. And then half the other half of the
time is like, what a jerk, this guy. I'll never
work in Hollywood again. He's not telling us how gratty
we are, right, So, yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:15):
But the guys that they that find it refreshing are
always the guys on top of the chain, you know, yeah, because.
Speaker 2 (22:21):
But everybody, everybody's always telling them yes, everybody's you know,
they always have yes men, and you know, and there
were there were casting directors that would do that. They
were like, I can't believe you're being such an ass
right now, and I'm like, yeah, well, this is just
who you get. It's what I am, right. I can't
put on the foot because like I just don't want
to pretend. And they're like, this is so refreshing. We're
never going to use you, but this is so wonderful
(22:42):
just to hear thank you.
Speaker 1 (22:43):
Well, that's awesome, my friend. Now what you are You
you have kids?
Speaker 2 (22:48):
Yeah, I've got a fourteen year old daughter and sixteen
year old son.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
Oh that is great, man? Are they are?
Speaker 4 (22:52):
They?
Speaker 1 (22:52):
Do they do impressions? Or they impression?
Speaker 2 (22:55):
Yeah? They're well, not depressed, but they look They couldn't
care less about me. But they can both do them.
My son's really good. He does he doesn't grud and
his voice got deeper than mine last year. All of
a sudden he starts going up till you what man,
I'm like, where did that come from? That's rudent berry White?
And my daughter can do them too, but I don't
(23:16):
know they don't. I was the same way. I didn't
want to be in entertainment at all. I had no
interest in it because I wasn't looking. I was I
it wasn't really looking for attention. And then you know,
I found I could make money from it, so I
started doing it. It's just that's part of my problem.
Speaker 1 (23:31):
Where'd you be your wife? How'd you meet her?
Speaker 2 (23:33):
She was in the front row of Uh, she was
in the front row of the improv in Cleveland.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
Oh that's great.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Not laughing at anything I did.
Speaker 1 (23:43):
Yes, right, that's your for me.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Embarrassed for me is what she was. That's what she's like.
I was embarrassed to watch it. But and she still complains.
I'm like, how much was the ticket? Twelve dollars? And
it was overpriced? And I'm like and then and like
we have three houses now, we three homes. I'm like,
that's a pretty good twelve dollars investment. You don't currently
have a job Amazon. The Amazon guy knows your name.
(24:09):
We're fine, you're doing well.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
So yeah, you know, but but you know you really can't.
We gotta take a break. Can you stay with us
y am for like five hours? Excellent? All right, Frank
hellando's with us. I will be right back with more.
You're listening to Tim Conway Junior on demand from KFI
AM six forty. All right, this has This is not
an advertiser. I was just at a buddy's house today
(24:34):
in Burbank and he's a big guy, and they're they're
all about being big in this family. So I'm not overstepping.
I'm not insulting them. You know, it's they live in
a house called the Big House. Right, He's big. His
wife's big, his kids are big. Everyone's big, right. They
got a big car, they got big furniture, and they're
(24:54):
just the bigs and they're just enjoying it, you know,
for now, right. I you know, later on in life,
who knows, you know what happens. But I smelled his
wife was cooking something in the kitchen. It really smelled good. Right,
I'm like, hey, what's your wife cooking? And he walks
in there and he opens up this thing and he says, ah,
(25:16):
these sausages, And I go, oh, man, I love the
I love sausages. You want to stay for sausages. I'm like, yeah,
I'll stay for sausages.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Right.
Speaker 1 (25:25):
So I looked at this thing that they're cooking on.
It looks like a foreman grill. Is that a foreman?
He says, no, that's our sausage griller. I'm like, what
should be talking? Waitnute, hold on and say you wait
sausage grill? I said, should you have a special piece
of equipment?
Speaker 6 (25:40):
Michelle talks about that she's got one the sausage really yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
And I've never seen it before, but I guess Johnsonville
or whoever makes this sausage makes this equipment. And man,
I really appreciate the fact that you're going for it
in life. When you have a special piece of equipment
that knocks sausages out see posts fixture of it all
the time, it's great. Yeah, I'm gonna get one.
Speaker 2 (26:03):
I love them.
Speaker 1 (26:03):
I the reason why I don't cook sausage all the
time is because they burn. You know, you can't evenly
cook them. You know, they're burned on one side. Then
you flip them around and they're not trained, right, They'll
flip right back to the burn side, right, And then
you like try to hold them in the middle, and
you spend all the all day trying to perfect this sausage.
You finally just say, ah, sprew it. But this thing
(26:26):
and again this is not a commercial. We're not plugging
away here. This is a piece of sausage equipment. Right,
let's crank up the computer here, Brestblan.
Speaker 6 (26:35):
But thanks better than delicious Johnson Bill sausages and bras Yeah,
Johnson Bills sausage grilled just made them even better.
Speaker 2 (26:44):
Just open it up, loaded up and eating.
Speaker 1 (26:47):
You can cook four She had, she had, she was
cooking fourteen sausages at a time, right, and it cooks
them like the form and grill, but the place where
you put the sausages it's encased one hundred percent inside,
so you know that when you put the top down,
the entire sausage cooks on the top and the bottom.
And man, it was so crisp on the outside. It's
(27:08):
got a it's got a drip pan in the front,
exactly the side. Yeah, that's exactly right, man. And it's
got a drip pan. It's got it's crisp on the
outside and really juicy on the inside. And I've never
you know, been a guy for you know, getting special
equipment to cook stuff. But I went home and ordered
one of these things. You really, Yeah, I got a
sausage maker coming. It's great, actually, go for Yeah. I
(27:31):
think it was forty nine or something like that. It
was with shipping and handling. I remember what it was.
It was, Oh no, it's two payments of forty nine.
So what is that one hundred? I think it was
a total of one hundred and nine dollars or something
like that. And I didn't give a red ass, man,
I was gonna I could have been seven hundred dollars
and I would have been Yeah, it hooked me up.
Speaker 6 (27:52):
All good things happen when a conversation starts with you
want to stay for sausages?
Speaker 2 (27:58):
Yeah, and.
Speaker 1 (28:01):
Man, I know a lot of people listening right now.
You love those Sunday morning sausages.
Speaker 2 (28:05):
Belly.
Speaker 1 (28:05):
I bet you knock out breakfast on a Sunday, right, yeah,
you kick? What do you cook? Bacon and eggs and
toast and all that stuff, and the whole house smells
like it.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
It only takes minutes and you'll always have a delicious,
crispy on the outside, juicy on me inside.
Speaker 1 (28:21):
The masterpiece, Oh man, that is. I'll tell you how
to get there. For people at you know, want to
buy one of these things like I did. It's called
what was the website Grill Sausage or sausagegrill dot com.
Anyway you'll find it. It's the Sausage Grill. And it
really is one of the highlights of my year that
(28:42):
I found this piece of equipment just by being over
at my dumb buddy's house. Conway Show on demand on
the iHeartRadio app. Now you can always hear us live
on KFI AM six forty four to seven pm Monday
through Friday and anytime on demand on the iHeartRadio app,
It's k if I Am six forty and you're listening
to the Conway Show on demand on the iHeartRadio app.
Thank go on, Timmy. Timmy, he's a liptos.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
He's always having such a lot of.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
With a lot too, Erica, k if I am at
six forty is Conway Show, Frank Caliendo's whether it's Frank?
Speaker 2 (00:38):
How are you?
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Sir?
Speaker 2 (00:39):
I am doing a fantastically average How's that?
Speaker 1 (00:43):
That is great?
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Man?
Speaker 1 (00:43):
What I treat this as I'm a major, major fan
and I and I rarely get excited when we have
guests on the show. We're on from six to ten PM,
and I always tell Belly Oak if you can please
book most guests for like ten after ten and uh,
And I guess people find that offensive, but.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
What the hell?
Speaker 1 (01:02):
But I loved watching you on on Fox over there
with you know the guys on his Sunday Morning because
it was you know, watching you know five guys talk
about football is great. But when there's humor involved, then
that means you add a whole new element, a whole
new audience.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Yeah. But it's the the thing about those tape sketches.
And I was there for nine years. Wow. Yeah, and
I think it changed last year, but Wriggle Robriggle was
there for like maybe nine ten years after that, so
and Kimmel was there before. But the tough thing is
that most of the funny stuff that happens on the
set between Terry Bradshaw and those guys is mistakes, right,
(01:39):
something goes wrong to is like, I can't believe I
just screwed up my own name again, Tara Bardshaw.
Speaker 3 (01:44):
That's I get myself confused with the William Shakespeare. You know,
the Bard. This is the Bard's And here's a Bard's tale.
My grandpapa used to clean up my bathroom.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
You know, dear, what are you been talking about? But
we would be on I would be on tape, and
you're on tape. Sometimes you just know it's not going
to be a good one. You know, You're you're waiting
for the afterward, and uh, you know how they're gonna
are are they going to react? So it became this
thing where Terry Bradshaw would have a catchphrase and his
catchphrase was not fun at funk. And it was as
(02:17):
though Simon coll On American Idol couldn't come up with
an analogy. You know, it's like not.
Speaker 3 (02:22):
Fun and not fun and not fun and not n
ot if you and wad not fun at Frank.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
So yeah, it was. It was great because then you're
you know, I was always around Hall of Fame Fame
football players and stuff like that.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
So but didn't even get pissed off. I mean, because
you know, sometimes the impression I would think either Madden
or Bradshaw would be the most likely to go this
is this is done?
Speaker 2 (02:50):
Yeah. Well, Terry I think used to get upset about
at the beginning a little bit. You know, he had
to put up with Kimmel and they kim would just
crush those guys. The thing about Jimmy is he you know,
he was adversarial. He I was cherubic, you know, I
had the chubby cheeks, and that would make it work
a little bit that I was just you know, I
looked like Cartmans in South Park doing you know, impressions
pretty good now and Jorge w you know, so that
(03:14):
stuff always kind of worked. But you know they told
Terry it's like wrestling. He's like, oh, does that mean
I'm going to wear a big hat? And by this
land people know you're gonna You're just it's a joke
where you're messing with each other. So Madden didn't like
me for a while, but I made him I talk
about this and you just talk to my act that
I made his grandkids laugh and it was like a
light bulb one over his head, Like I guess now
(03:34):
you know that that kind of a thing. Then when
I went to ESPN, you know Gruden. Gruden didn't know
how to take me. And I met him finally he's like, sill,
you're the guy thugs like me, huh. I'm like how'd
you figure that out?
Speaker 1 (03:47):
Man?
Speaker 2 (03:48):
He's like, where are you from? And I googled where
he was from? So I said that I was like
saying dusky high and he's like really, I'm like no.
He's like good because you were blowing my mind.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
Man.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
But I've become friends with Gruden. Now he'll text it,
you know, that's great. Yeah. He would text me at
like it's so funny. He would text me at like
three in the morning, wow, which is like lunchtime for him, right,
like I gotta get up? What time? I asked it
one time? What time you go bed? That's seven o'clock PM? Wow.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
So but I love I spent especially love the Madden
stuff that you did around Thanksgiving with the buffet and
all the fun.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
Oh you love that, because I got sick of it
after about the twelfth time. I go, hey, stuff and
chicken and to induct him to some other animal. And
let's see what kind of word we can make up here. Yeah. Yeah,
people always I mean people always like people still you know,
people still't bring that up to me.
Speaker 4 (04:39):
Now.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
It's kind of funny about how it was great.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Now, So you grew up in Wisconsin. Were mom and
dad not in favor of you trying to get into
show biz?
Speaker 2 (04:47):
No, my dad was a minor league baseball player, so
and so he knew, you know you kind of I
didn't know what I was gonna do. My dad didn't
care like grades in our house were int seeing because
my dad was say, hey, I got c's nothing wrong
with a C. You know, that's that's not that's nothing
like you know some of the kids I knew, like
if they didn't get a's they get swatted at or
(05:09):
something like that. My Dad's like, hey, he's good, he's average.
You could be average. You do a lot with average,
you know what.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
My dad was the same way my mom was a
little you know, a stickler for grades. But my dad
was like, look, you know, my my dad in high
school had like a C minus or D plus, uh,
you know, average. And he says, he goes, look at
the house I got.
Speaker 5 (05:29):
You know.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I mean there's true that if you listen to people
like Gary Vee and stuff like that, they'll tell you that,
you know, school isn't set up to be uh, you
know for the entrepreneurs and people who are going to
be you know, outside the bus. I have a funny
story about your your dad. Uh was that right? Yeah,
the I was doing Hot in Cleveland. I was guest
(05:51):
starring on Hot in Cleveland. Steve Lawrence was on, you know,
Betty White was there, and Hillary Burtonelli he was, you know,
part of the cast and all that stuff. And there
were some other people on as well. And Uh, I'm
going I'm leaving to go out the door, and there's
a guy. There's a doorman. There's never been a doorman
at the stage of the whole week. There's a doorman.
He's maybe five five or something like that. I'm like,
(06:12):
this is what's going on here? And he's kind of
acting really slow, like God, the guy looks like Tim Conway,
and I go it is Tim Connor. I'm like, what
do you do? And he would not acknowledge that hat
who he was. He was like, I have no idea.
I have no idea what you're talking. I think he
was there to watch Steve Allen, right or not not
Steve Allen. It was yes, Steve and Edy, Steve Lawrence. Yeah,
(06:34):
Steve Lawrence. So he was there to watch him, but
it was oh, yeah, it was. He was totally in character,
didn't break character, and some people didn't know. They're just like,
who's what's with the doorman. I'm like, I have no idea.
He's a familiar face, but I imagined him being a shorter.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
Yeah, he's that. That skippy character was great when he
played you know, the Old Man with Harvey Korman and
Harvey's you know mansion was on fire and he had
to break into the you know, the first story window
to get into him. It was great. And if you
ever go back and look at that sketch, none of
that stuff was rehearsed. Where he had to give him
mouth to mouth resuscitation, he puts his armed arm under
(07:11):
him and he says to Harvey, so what time do
you get on.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
It?
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Really it was a lot of fun. But my dad
was also a big fan. He loved the impressions and
he always said to me, you know, he said, he goes,
this guy is great because he doesn't rely on five
impressions and then just calls it a career. You update
him all the time, because a lot of guys that
do impressions and they get five or six great ones
and then they fall back on that and they don't
(07:37):
do any more work. But every time somebody I turn
on YouTube, you got another one.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Yeah. I mean I did get stuck for a while.
I'll be honest with you. There was a time where
I just I kind of gave up and was But
now you know, with all these Avengers movies and stuff
like that. But people, it's interesting because you find people
like I was doing a thing where I show people
how some impressions are very similar. So if you did,
you could you could start with Robert Jenny Junior, do
(08:04):
me a favor. And here's the thing with Robert Jowny Junior.
If you did his cadence, it's one, two, three, four, five,
sixt seven. Okay, But if you go like Robert junior.
If you take Robert Jenny Junior, you start to slow
him down, he becomes doctor Evil.
Speaker 5 (08:18):
And then if you do this and you add some
airing this, it becomes Donald Trump. Quite frankly, probably there's
a lot of people who say a tremendous amount of
things and throw me a freaking bone here.
Speaker 1 (08:29):
Please have you met Trump?
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Yeah? I did a sketch with him ten fifteen, probably
fifteen years ago.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Oh, that's great.
Speaker 5 (08:36):
It was like the jokes where I decided to run
for president. Now I've decided to not run for president.
Now I've decided to not not run for president. Now
I'm not not not running for president.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
That's well. And you're the only guy I know that
does Norm McDonald. Nobody else does n't.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
I though a lot of people do him. Norm just
doesn't like anybody except for me because years ago I
used to I kind of used to do Norm like right,
like every but hey would do it you know that, Yeah,
everybody do it like that. But you know it's actually
down a little deeper like this. You know you ever
been to the The thing about Norm McDonald is this,
this is the observation from him, because he's a brilliant
(09:11):
writer people. Not everybody knows how brilliant he is in
terms of writing, because his cadence and just being himself
can carry it as well. Sure, uh but he'll he'll
make you laugh on words that are so normal and
you're like, why am I laughing? There's no joke here,
it's just the words that'd be Like you ever been
to yeah, yeah, tim, you ever been to the you know,
(09:32):
the the grocery store. Why is that so funny? Why
it's the grocery store? Yeah, it was at the So
I was over there at the grocery store. You ever
been to Aisle five? Aisle five? As where those eyes are?
They got the they got the toothpick on a hot dog?
Speaker 4 (09:49):
So hey, what you do?
Speaker 2 (09:51):
And I'm spearfishing with processed meat?
Speaker 4 (09:55):
You know?
Speaker 1 (09:58):
He is great brilli. Every single comedian who you ask,
even like you know, Letterman and Lenno and all those guys,
when you when you press him on who's the funniest
you know outside of themselves, it's all it's always uh
Norm MacDonald doing stand up. For some reason, he connects
with all those guys.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
Because he has no fear and he just does and
he he will just go out there and he'll take
every day things that nobody else could make funny. But
he sent out a tweet he goes Usually impressionists are
the most unfunny human beings in the world. But an
exception is the Great Frank Calliando, who is the only
(10:38):
guy on earth that I think does me. And then
all every comedian on earth was texting me and message.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
Hey hold him one sec. Frank Kell, this is great man.
What is a huge treat for me? And we'll continue
with him. You're listening to Tim Conway Junior on demand from.
Speaker 2 (10:59):
Kf I.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
Frank kellandos with us Frank kellendo dot com, where the
schedule is of his appearances coming up. Frank, When you
play like the hard rock hotel and casino after the
show's over, do you ever hit the tables?
Speaker 2 (11:14):
No? Not really. Yeah, I gotta go hide. I'm one
of those. But I should tell people that I do,
because then that's probably advertising for them. Right.
Speaker 1 (11:22):
I was in Vegas. My dad was playing at the
Hilton in Vegas and we were both there with He
was with his wife, my stepmother, and I was with
my wife and we're just having, you know, an afternoon snack.
He was gonna do the show that night, and like
at four o'clock he said, I'm gonna go take a
shower and you know, head to the addressing room. I said,
all right, I'm gonna go to the men's room. I'll
(11:43):
see you down there at six thirty or so. And
about three minutes later, I look across the crabs table
from me and it's my dad. We both bsd our
wives and ended up at the same crab table.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
That's awesome.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
It was great.
Speaker 5 (11:59):
Man.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
It's like father likes then we both also lie to
our same doctor. Right, But I love the uh like
when when you come out. I mean, first of all,
when when you do your show it never stops. I
don't know how you do it, but it seems like,
you know, you never repeat an impression and it all
is funny and the audience absolutely loves it.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
Yeah, you know, I end up talking to myself. That's
the thing that's different about me, is I end up creating.
Like what I do is I set up how the
person thinks in my mind. So like a person like
al Pacino. He's an actor, right, So in acting, they
teach you to be curious because you know what the
next line is. But you have to be curious, so
you don't really know what the next line is, but
(12:40):
be curious of what the person's going to say and
have the feeling that you've never heard it before. And
Pacino does that so amazingly that you know, you could
turn on a light switch and he'd be amazed by that,
be like whoa wait a second, I mean you flip
a switch over there and goes over here. This is sorcery.
How does it get done? I don't get it? So yeah,
(13:03):
it's like, what's the point? Who is the person like
or the formula of the person?
Speaker 4 (13:08):
You know.
Speaker 2 (13:08):
Another one is like Jeff Goeblm, I've done this forever,
like it commits to something one hundred percent and then
to a complete winnie, like what's your favorite food? I
like hot dogs. They very good. Like hot dogs, mister catch,
Chili dogs are good. Cheese dogs are better. Wait wait
a second, I'm a vegetarian. And Goblm is one of
those guys that he doesn't use SI. There's like not
(13:30):
really any silence. He fills it with a sound, so
a lot of people would pause and like his pauses
are in the middle in between words. I'm filling it
with jazz. Good it Scott that I'm a scattering I asked,
not scattered brain, I'm a scat, A jazz scat guy.
Speaker 1 (13:50):
Hey, dude, do you ever like, uh, you know back,
you know, twenty years ago. You know you can do
things and you know they cancel culture that you know
the mob wouldn't be after you. But do ye now
have to watch what you say sometimes on stage?
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Yeah, because I'm and I haven't been on as much.
I mean, I I'm I always worry about that stuff
because I'm somebody who's kind of for everybody. But I'm
finding that it's a weird thing where I don't know.
I don't want to be labeled anything either. That's the
that's the difficult thing. I don't want to be put
in a box because I'm kind of a middle of
the road person and nowadays that's weird to people like,
(14:24):
oh my gosh, you were you're in the center, You're evil. No,
I'm just saying I can see different sides of things.
You know, you can't see different sides, and that's their problem.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
I know, you gotta be on one team or the other.
Speaker 2 (14:36):
I remember talking to Dane. It was Dane Cook and
Harlan Williams in Montreal, and I don't remember why I remember,
probably because Harlan Williams was.
Speaker 4 (14:43):
The Hi buddy, will you kind of get around to
Harlan Williams impression my front, But I don't remember who
said it, and that's why I set up it was
like three different comedians, but it was that. It was
that Don Rickles would just breathe out on the punk line.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
It didn't matter what he was saying. He would say.
He'd be like, hey, there your baseball bat? And what's he?
What's he? Actually? Is there anything? That's because he would
say things certain times you're like, is that even I
don't know, is that something you're not supposed to say?
But because it's Don looking like PC, Don Rickles like,
you know, hey they're generic guy, who I you know what?
Speaker 1 (15:24):
That's good? That is awesome. Well, buddy, I really enjoyed
you coming on and thanks for the uh uh the
the I guess we met you through uh social media here,
but well you.
Speaker 2 (15:35):
Know I was on I was on one of your
shows years and years ago. You don't remember, yeah, KALs X, right, yeah,
I was on there because I was like I remember
because you got on me. You were ripping me. It
was fun and in fun kind of that's what you said,
but it was I was like, I'm not really good
at improv, and you're like, well, that's kind of what
we're going to be doing for the next twenty minutes.
I'm like, yeah, I can improv with myself, but I'm
(15:57):
not good at the form of improv like a groundlings
or something like that, and you're just like, that's not
gonna go. So well, that's great.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
I think I was well for the first I think
six years I was doing this. I was so high.
I was highac kite. I don't remember anything or anybody
that to actually walked through the door.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
I had fun. I was fun, and buddy, look much
better than this.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
Anytime you know you're in town, please, we'll, we'll, we'll,
we'll do nothing but talk about the show, buddy. Frank,
I really appreciate coming on anytime you got an open invitation,
anytime you're in town. Will just give you more publicity
than you could imagine.
Speaker 2 (16:33):
Awesome, see you tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
All right, thanks, Okay, all right, Frank Caliendo. I go
to the website Frankkaaliendo dot com. That's C. A. L
I E N d O. The greatest impression is in
the world. Man, that is awesome.
Speaker 6 (16:46):
That's one of those guys that I have. If I
wished I could have done something like with my voice
because I love doing voices of people, right, that's that's
the type of stuff that I would have loved to
have had.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
Yeah, but you should. You could still do it.
Speaker 2 (16:58):
I mean you're young.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
I know I wouldn't.
Speaker 6 (17:00):
My whole issue has been like I don't even know
where to where to begin to who to go to?
And yeah, you know what's funny because he talked about it,
he touched on a little bit and break is h
He talked about how sometimes you do impressions of people
and they don't they don't get.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
You know that. It's all.
Speaker 6 (17:16):
It's not meant to be mean or denigrading in any way.
It's it truly is when I feel like I can
touch on somebody's voice or some little mannerism that they
have to me, it's it's a high compliment.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
It's great.
Speaker 6 (17:28):
Yeah, it's it's an honor for me to do somebody's
voice because I only do unique voices.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
Right aspects of people's all right, Frank call Leander that
was awesome. Thanks Belly on Giant Stude, you get the
little microphone on your helmet. Yeah, you're listening to Tim
Conway Junior on demand from KFI AM six forty.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
You know David Spade to your friends with him, I'm
not friends with him. I've met him before years ago.
He and Kevin Farley stopped by a show when I
was on TBS. They were coming by when we were
let's taping something.
Speaker 1 (18:00):
Yeah, but uh, I mean with Spade, I mean, you know,
they're very Rarely do comedians get funner, funnier as they
get older. I can't think of any right, but he's
one of those guys that, like the last five or
six years, has gotten funnier than he was when he
was younger.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Yeah, I think, you know, I think sometimes you just
get used to him and we, I mean we as
audience members change two. You know, you start, you evolve
as an audience member and watch how people do things,
and again, sometimes people just have they they get more
and more fearless. And that's like what we're talking about
before with Norm McDonald. People enjoy that type of stuff
(18:36):
and it's refreshing and you don't see it.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
That much yeah, and Norm McDonald the whole thing he
did with you know, he was told to back off
the O. J. Simpson jokes and then he turned it
up to one hundred.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, because you know what, uh, you know
what OJ did there? Right? You ever see that? You
ever see that? Yeah? Then he then he wrote a
book you know what I would have done? Yeah, that's
a good idea. Hey yeah, yeah, he als. I read
another book. I've got a knife and I'm bored.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
He's unbelievable. Hey, now listen when you go to do
these shows, I'm sure that people yelling out all the time.
Like we even had some guy textas just now saying
you're Brett Farv. First of all, nobody else does Brett Farb.
And he said, if Frank does Brett Farv on your show,
he's gonna eat his own s.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
Well, I don't even I don't do it. Brett Favre,
it's just Madden that used to talk about Brett Favre.
I love Brett far I mean Brett farre brunt. One
time I did that with Brett Favre standing next to me.
I'm just going Brett far Brett far but far far
bred far Bret Farv and I moved the camera over
to me. He's just going, oh no, not more of this.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
Hey, you must have been young when you are on
Mad TV.
Speaker 2 (19:48):
Huh probably twenty five. Oh man, let's see, I'm forty
seven now. Probably in my mid twenties something like that.
Speaker 1 (19:55):
What was the big break for you?
Speaker 2 (19:58):
Uh? In terms, my career is always like little things
that happened. I went to I went to LA. When
I first went to LA, I got offered a bunch
of development deals because I would do like fifty impressions
in two minutes and nobody was I was doing odd
ones like Craig Kilbourn, like Kelbay. Oh yeah, you had
a lot of may and totyddshit. I was doing weird
(20:18):
things like that that they're like, who is this guy?
So then I got a show for the WB. Uh.
You know, your show's not going well with the whole
the whole night was name. It was called Hype was
the name of the show, and it was the first
two weeks were Hype Night on the WB. Three weeks
later the WB Sunday. You know you're getting canceled, So
(20:41):
we did that. I did that. Then I went over
to Mad TV. They put me on that for a while,
and uh, that's when I got the NFL on Fox
stuff and I really kind of that's why I started
concentrating on the sports stuff because there was making so
much money doing it. And the thing about analysts and
sports people is what do they do? They break down sports,
and you just take that fish out of water and
(21:02):
have them break things down in real life and all
of a sudden, it's you know, it's it's it's great.
That's where the comedy comes from.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
Did did Lauren Michael's ever call you? I'm sure you
you know you know.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
I I went. When I first went to l A,
there was a there was a tent, you know, like
a a president of NSBC who was only there for
like a month or something. He's like, you want us
to put you on Saturday Night Live. I was like,
it would be an option. And then my managers after
we left, the manager at the time after we left
the the meeting was like, why did you say it
(21:36):
would only be an option? I'm like, because you told
me never to show my cards, just like yeo. But
but I always made I would always make people because
I would go into I would go into a meeting.
But I would go into meetings with like executives and
I would just be myself. I wouldn't pander, and I
wouldn't just try and put on a pretend professional. I'd
(21:58):
just be myself. And it was fifty to fifty. Sometimes
it would just crush in the room and people are like,
oh my god, I can't believe he talks to people
like this. And then half the other half of the
time is like, what a jerk, this guy. I'll never
work in Hollywood again. He's not telling us how gratty
we are, right, So, yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:15):
But the guys that they that find it refreshing are
always the guys on top of the chain, you know, yeah, because.
Speaker 2 (22:21):
But everybody, everybody's always telling them yes, everybody's you know,
they always have yes men, and you know, and there
were there were casting directors that would do that. They
were like, I can't believe you're being such an ass
right now, and I'm like, yeah, well, this is just
who you get. It's what I am, right. I can't
put on the foot because like I just don't want
to pretend. And they're like, this is so refreshing. We're
never going to use you, but this is so wonderful
(22:42):
just to hear thank you.
Speaker 1 (22:43):
Well, that's awesome, my friend. Now what you are You
you have kids?
Speaker 2 (22:48):
Yeah, I've got a fourteen year old daughter and sixteen
year old son.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
Oh that is great, man? Are they are?
Speaker 4 (22:52):
They?
Speaker 1 (22:52):
Do they do impressions? Or they impression?
Speaker 2 (22:55):
Yeah? They're well, not depressed, but they look They couldn't
care less about me. But they can both do them.
My son's really good. He does he doesn't grud and
his voice got deeper than mine last year. All of
a sudden he starts going up till you what man,
I'm like, where did that come from? That's rudent berry White?
And my daughter can do them too, but I don't
(23:16):
know they don't. I was the same way. I didn't
want to be in entertainment at all. I had no
interest in it because I wasn't looking. I was I
it wasn't really looking for attention. And then you know,
I found I could make money from it, so I
started doing it. It's just that's part of my problem.
Speaker 1 (23:31):
Where'd you be your wife? How'd you meet her?
Speaker 2 (23:33):
She was in the front row of Uh, she was
in the front row of the improv in Cleveland.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
Oh that's great.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Not laughing at anything I did.
Speaker 1 (23:43):
Yes, right, that's your for me.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Embarrassed for me is what she was. That's what she's like.
I was embarrassed to watch it. But and she still complains.
I'm like, how much was the ticket? Twelve dollars? And
it was overpriced? And I'm like and then and like
we have three houses now, we three homes. I'm like,
that's a pretty good twelve dollars investment. You don't currently
have a job Amazon. The Amazon guy knows your name.
(24:09):
We're fine, you're doing well.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
So yeah, you know, but but you know you really can't.
We gotta take a break. Can you stay with us
y am for like five hours? Excellent? All right, Frank
hellando's with us. I will be right back with more.
You're listening to Tim Conway Junior on demand from KFI
AM six forty. All right, this has This is not
an advertiser. I was just at a buddy's house today
(24:34):
in Burbank and he's a big guy, and they're they're
all about being big in this family. So I'm not overstepping.
I'm not insulting them. You know, it's they live in
a house called the Big House. Right, He's big. His
wife's big, his kids are big. Everyone's big, right. They
got a big car, they got big furniture, and they're
(24:54):
just the bigs and they're just enjoying it, you know,
for now, right. I you know, later on in life,
who knows, you know what happens. But I smelled his
wife was cooking something in the kitchen. It really smelled good. Right,
I'm like, hey, what's your wife cooking? And he walks
in there and he opens up this thing and he says, ah,
(25:16):
these sausages, And I go, oh, man, I love the
I love sausages. You want to stay for sausages. I'm like, yeah,
I'll stay for sausages.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Right.
Speaker 1 (25:25):
So I looked at this thing that they're cooking on.
It looks like a foreman grill. Is that a foreman?
He says, no, that's our sausage griller. I'm like, what
should be talking? Waitnute, hold on and say you wait
sausage grill? I said, should you have a special piece
of equipment?
Speaker 6 (25:40):
Michelle talks about that she's got one the sausage really yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
And I've never seen it before, but I guess Johnsonville
or whoever makes this sausage makes this equipment. And man,
I really appreciate the fact that you're going for it
in life. When you have a special piece of equipment
that knocks sausages out see posts fixture of it all
the time, it's great. Yeah, I'm gonna get one.
Speaker 2 (26:03):
I love them.
Speaker 1 (26:03):
I the reason why I don't cook sausage all the
time is because they burn. You know, you can't evenly
cook them. You know, they're burned on one side. Then
you flip them around and they're not trained, right, They'll
flip right back to the burn side, right, And then
you like try to hold them in the middle, and
you spend all the all day trying to perfect this sausage.
You finally just say, ah, sprew it. But this thing
(26:26):
and again this is not a commercial. We're not plugging
away here. This is a piece of sausage equipment. Right,
let's crank up the computer here, Brestblan.
Speaker 6 (26:35):
But thanks better than delicious Johnson Bill sausages and bras Yeah,
Johnson Bills sausage grilled just made them even better.
Speaker 2 (26:44):
Just open it up, loaded up and eating.
Speaker 1 (26:47):
You can cook four She had, she had, she was
cooking fourteen sausages at a time, right, and it cooks
them like the form and grill, but the place where
you put the sausages it's encased one hundred percent inside,
so you know that when you put the top down,
the entire sausage cooks on the top and the bottom.
And man, it was so crisp on the outside. It's
(27:08):
got a it's got a drip pan in the front,
exactly the side. Yeah, that's exactly right, man. And it's
got a drip pan. It's got it's crisp on the
outside and really juicy on the inside. And I've never
you know, been a guy for you know, getting special
equipment to cook stuff. But I went home and ordered
one of these things. You really, Yeah, I got a
sausage maker coming. It's great, actually, go for Yeah. I
(27:31):
think it was forty nine or something like that. It
was with shipping and handling. I remember what it was.
It was, Oh no, it's two payments of forty nine.
So what is that one hundred? I think it was
a total of one hundred and nine dollars or something
like that. And I didn't give a red ass, man,
I was gonna I could have been seven hundred dollars
and I would have been Yeah, it hooked me up.
Speaker 6 (27:52):
All good things happen when a conversation starts with you
want to stay for sausages?
Speaker 2 (27:58):
Yeah, and.
Speaker 1 (28:01):
Man, I know a lot of people listening right now.
You love those Sunday morning sausages.
Speaker 2 (28:05):
Belly.
Speaker 1 (28:05):
I bet you knock out breakfast on a Sunday, right, yeah,
you kick? What do you cook? Bacon and eggs and
toast and all that stuff, and the whole house smells
like it.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
It only takes minutes and you'll always have a delicious,
crispy on the outside, juicy on me inside.
Speaker 1 (28:21):
The masterpiece, Oh man, that is. I'll tell you how
to get there. For people at you know, want to
buy one of these things like I did. It's called
what was the website Grill Sausage or sausagegrill dot com.
Anyway you'll find it. It's the Sausage Grill. And it
really is one of the highlights of my year that
(28:42):
I found this piece of equipment just by being over
at my dumb buddy's house. Conway Show on demand on
the iHeartRadio app. Now you can always hear us live
on KFI AM six forty four to seven pm Monday
through Friday and anytime on demand on the iHeartRadio app,
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