December 20, 2025 • 57 mins
Aussie actor Rob Carlton and comedian Elouise Eftos take over hosting duties in these final episodes of the year, asking Gary Jubelin all the tough listener questions. From friendship and fame to criminal convictions and becoming Thailand’s accidental sex tourism ambassador - this chat has a little bit of everything, even Gary’s dog Spike joins the studio.
Learn more about Rob Carlton’s show, Virgin In A Knife Fight, touring nationally in 2026 here, or listen to Rob’s new podcast Braveworlds here.
Learn more about Elouise’s work in progress show, The Trophy, and find out tour dates here.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
The public has had a long held fascination with detectives.
Detective sy aside of life the average person is never
exposed to. I spent thirty four years as a cop.
For twenty five of those years I was catching killers.
That's what I did for a living. I was a
homicide detective. I'm no longer just interviewing bad guys. Instead,
I'm taking the public into the world in which I operated.
(00:23):
The guests I talk to each week have amazing stories
from all sides of the law. The interviews are raw
and honest, just like the people I talk to. Some
of the content and language might be confronting. That's because
no one who comes into contact with crime is left unchanged.
Join me now as I take you into this world.
(00:46):
Welcome to the Eye Catch Killers Christmas Special. I'm not
going to say much about what happened during this You're
just going to have to listen. But the guests that
we had on was my good mate Rob Carlton and
Eloise f Toos, stand up comedian and Rob's the actor
mate that I've had on before. Have a listen. It
was a lot of fun. We just talked and talked
(01:07):
and mucked around and had a bit of fun for Christmas.
I hope you enjoy the episode. Welcome to the Christmas
Special of Eye Catch Killers. And I've bought my good
mate my off side of the Spike in Rob Carlton
and Eloi's f tos. Now. The reason I've brought you
guys in. I've been doing true crime all year. I'm tired.
(01:28):
I'm worn out. We've had some heavy stuff, so I
thought we'd lighten it up a little bit for Christmas.
And quite frankly, I am just tired. So I'm going
to throw it over to you guys, as dangerous as
that might be. The podcast is called I Catch Killers,
just so we know the brand name that's around there.
Yeah that's good.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
I feel a bit bond ass.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
You've got into the vibe. There's no rules on I
Catch Killers. You guys are in charge. I'm going to
hand it over here.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
Okay, this should be a completely different podcast if I
was in charge.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Yeah, well, let's hope it's not too good.
Speaker 4 (02:08):
I will say that they would everyone would be a dog. Actually,
if it was my podcast.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Everyone would be Look at spot squad, you know on
that quickly what sort of dog would Gary be?
Speaker 5 (02:21):
Let's play that guy.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
I love this game.
Speaker 4 (02:23):
This is I think this is really keeping it light
and people are already laughing.
Speaker 5 (02:27):
We're keeping this energy.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
I feel like beautiful no plugs too snorty.
Speaker 4 (02:34):
I feel like you'd be like a what are those
ones that look quite scary like they but they have beautiful.
Speaker 5 (02:41):
Eyes land shark.
Speaker 4 (02:43):
Yeah, or even I'm like a bulldog, but like a sleek,
a sleek one, a thin.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
I'll take that nice like it's a nice you know.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
Okay, my takeaway was tough emotionally and tell it. Wow, happy,
that's all you ever hear?
Speaker 5 (03:02):
Gary?
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Yeah, flirting, that's good.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
We've got to keep an eye. Rob flirting?
Speaker 4 (03:08):
Yes, yes, please do not you two flirting with each
other while I'm here.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
I've not spik Yeah.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
Hey listen, if you do see sparks flow over here
with Garry and eye you just gentle.
Speaker 5 (03:20):
We're just a couple of blokes trying to get through
a life.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
I love this.
Speaker 4 (03:23):
They say, you know there's a metal in this. No,
there's a look at this romance.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
Together actually for the listeners, for the listeners at home,
Gary and I, if you're not aware, we do have
a long standing relationship.
Speaker 5 (03:38):
So we've been friends for twenty twenty five years now.
Speaker 3 (03:42):
We started just training together running the hills of Copa
Cabana a couple of mates, and then we just got
chatting and then through that we're just hanging out.
Speaker 5 (03:51):
We share stories.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
Then I mean, then we started working together for the
first time with the Killer's Road Shirt and that was fun.
Speaker 4 (03:58):
We have really did you guys get up to on
that road show? And it was so wholesome, brunches together, yoga,
a lot.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Of driving, driving after parties, wild well.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
One nearly went off hook in Dubble because all the
all the prison guards were out there and if you
want things to get loose quickly, just go out with
the prison guard.
Speaker 5 (04:29):
Gary.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
How much can we say?
Speaker 1 (04:33):
Well, how far we can take it? There were some
late night calls made and then that people were eventually
Spike doesn't want to hear this enough.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Spike having a stretch.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
It's traumatizing. Yeah, so we're phone calls made for missing people,
but they were all.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
Fan everyone got f that's nice and so for those
of you at home wondering why why we're here. So
that's what Gary and I have this long standing relationship.
He said, Look, we want to light this thing up,
We've got this Christmas episode. Will you come in and
spend a couple of hours in the studio with me?
And I thought that sounds onerous, So then I thought,
how much more fun would it be with Eloise f time?
(05:12):
So now there is an Eloise and I know we
met over the course of the last year. Yes, I've
been traveling the country doing fringe festivals with my solo shot.
One of the great joys of traveling the French festival
is to meet all the bright new young things that
are coming through the industry. You're seeing incredibly funny people, smart,
(05:33):
intelligent people. Eloise happily is all of those three.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Oh bless you for saying that.
Speaker 5 (05:39):
And so Eloise shot.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
Now this actually might cast me in a slightly sketchy light.
Speaker 5 (05:46):
Well, let's just hold the funest Okay, Okay.
Speaker 3 (05:50):
Her show is called Australia's First Attractive Comedian.
Speaker 4 (05:56):
Obviously, and if you're watching this, and thank you for
saying that, and if you're watching this, yes you can
obviously you agree.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
No, there's obviously more to the show.
Speaker 3 (06:05):
But anyway, the reason I mentioned it might sound sketches,
I show you this first attractive commitee and I've been
gone say that just curve right, but knowing a little
bit about how the world where I thought all we
were on here, that's really interesting. I went and saw
Eloise's showing perf.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Yes you did.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
I thought it was astonishing. I really loved it was
really interesting and funny and sexy and and vulnerable.
Speaker 5 (06:25):
It was all of these things.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
And then because we were doing the same festivals, we
caught up at Adelaide Festival.
Speaker 4 (06:31):
Allowed to me in Adelaide and no, when I can't
believe because I think you I don't know if we'd
met or you messaged when I was in Perth and
you said I loved.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
Your show, and I was like, oh my god. And
then you came up to me. You said, Eloise and Adelaine,
I went, Robert, I was a big fan of yours,
and I just couldn't believe that you'd come to my show.
Speaker 4 (06:47):
And I was I was actually in shock because I
obviously watched you, you know, be an incredible actor. As
an actor, look up to you and very in awe
of what you do, and so that was very exciting
to me, you know, on the same circuit. And and
the fact that that Rob saw my show and liked it,
and he, you know, was impressed by what and he
also gave me some good advice. He was like, don't
(07:08):
worry about because I this is, you know, me touring
this show in cities that I've I guess.
Speaker 2 (07:13):
I mean, I'm a Perth girl.
Speaker 4 (07:14):
But I was doing it in cities I hadn't played
before or like performed this show before. You know, I
don't do self deprecating humor. That can be quite it's
like the opposite of what comedians usually do.
Speaker 5 (07:23):
It's quite old and brassy. She's up front and she's
just for women. You know, I'm hot, get over it.
Speaker 3 (07:30):
But there was an element of in those earlier shows
where she was just couching it.
Speaker 5 (07:34):
A little bit.
Speaker 3 (07:34):
Yeah, And I was like, Ni, sister, we get it, man,
we know you've been funny, and those that don't, I'll
get on board.
Speaker 5 (07:40):
So just and well, it was the.
Speaker 2 (07:43):
Whole thing of owning it.
Speaker 4 (07:44):
I think it's like with anything, and I think it's unfortunately,
which is what the show's about. The shows about feminism,
and it's almost like this conditioning that we have as
women to be people pleasers. So for me to go
on stage and go I'm actually way too hot to
do comedy and I'm funnier and better than everyone else is.
Obviously it's a very like bold statement. But for me
(08:04):
it was the shows about the response that not only
people but also other comedians gave you when I firstespecially
in Australia, tall poppy syndrome, et cetera, et cetera. But yeah,
it was a really good point because I think it
definitely helped me as I went on doing the show,
because it was sort of me going, this is what
I'm saying. You either get on board or you don't,
and I have to be too with it either way,
you know.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
Joy Yeah, and then a tech that have just missed
the point.
Speaker 4 (08:29):
Yeah they have, they have missed the point and there's yeah,
a lot of layers to it, and.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
It's great for me. Also, I think I had this.
Speaker 4 (08:35):
I think it's very you know, on trend to sort
of have this thing of like, oh, you know, men
don't get it or like you know they're not going
to because on the poster is like me, it's like
a Bond poster.
Speaker 2 (08:44):
It's very it's inspired. It's me in a white bikini like.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
A show for what Robert to someone my age a
bikini and launch.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
It's basically the same thing. And also it's very Doctor No.
Speaker 4 (09:01):
It's a Doctor No inspired like the yellow poster with
the red riding and I love, you know, the Bond
Bond films. But for me it's you know, even putting
up that post, I was like, Oh God, who's going
to come to the show?
Speaker 2 (09:12):
Men won't get it. It's about feminism.
Speaker 4 (09:13):
And then I was telling Rob on the phone the
other day when I went to Edinburgh, I was a
little bit staunch. I had these nights where they it
looked like it was just men in the audience. I
was going, oh, what have I done?
Speaker 5 (09:25):
Well?
Speaker 2 (09:25):
A little bit worried that was the energy.
Speaker 4 (09:27):
And then I said, I said to Robert, I almost
went into staunch, and I was like, I opened the
show doing Basic Instincts. I could to do a parody
of Basic instinct And it's a very sexy, silly show,
but it has a message.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
And I think I was a bit you know what
is this a klu Klux clown meeting? And I was
being really like, you know what do you guys think
this is?
Speaker 4 (09:45):
Like this show's about feminism, you know, so you better
bring your wives, you know, if you come again or
and then that was the night they gave me a
standing ovation.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
I had all these like amazing there was.
Speaker 4 (09:53):
You know, women and queer men further further up in
the in the in the seats, but all these middle
aged men coming up to me after saying, you know,
thank you.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
That was a really thought provoking show.
Speaker 4 (10:03):
So I can't believe that I had this almost this
moment of like I'm judging the audience, I'm doing what
I'm what I don't want them to do to me.
Speaker 1 (10:11):
But challenge of people get together gether reaction totally, which.
Speaker 5 (10:16):
Is why she's here today.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Yes, sorry, Rob, had been thinking of way to reach
out to you for how long? And then I stop.
Speaker 3 (10:27):
So pretty much everyone that caused me in the last
six months is like, man, can I get ellowe's in
on this?
Speaker 1 (10:33):
I say, Rob, do you want to go training? I'll ring.
Speaker 5 (10:37):
Anyway.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
So this is how it came about, was that Gary
said to me, we've got the Christmas Special, We've got
a lot of questions from the listeners, and we've got
all these great questions from your listeners, and there's a
whole stack I really want to get into. So that's
going to be the spine of the show. But I
really did think it would be heaps more fun if
we've got a bright young comic with us and someone
that doesn't know actually to get that stick into our dynamic,
(11:00):
because we can fall into our rhythms. Obviously, we've got
Spike here. In case anyone in taxes.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
That was a Christmas party, I put my invites out next.
Speaker 5 (11:11):
Just on that Gary.
Speaker 3 (11:12):
There's questions about friendships and loneliness in the force and
things like that.
Speaker 5 (11:16):
I do, I wonder and I worry. Is that a
companion animal?
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Spike, Spike, get up here?
Speaker 2 (11:24):
I mean, I hope, so come here, come here, very obedient.
Speaker 5 (11:28):
For the listener. Spoke just came straight to me.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
A couple of things with Spike. Yes, he is a
good friend, and he's a good style of a dog.
We get on well, he's got a personality's a little
bit emotionally withdrawn sometimes.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
Okay for you, you you have your dark clouds.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
We just sit there. He used to be a drug squad,
very good, but he got sacked from the police the
same time I did because he was playing in the
exhibit room.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
We've got a situations.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
The reason I wanted to bring Spike along is when
I did travel with Rob, I thought it's funny how
all dogs like Rob. But Rob doesn't like dogs because
when whenever we're sitting at the airport, you know the
dogs that walk around on the lead, and they always
come up, and every time he sees a dog, he
(12:27):
got very concerned.
Speaker 3 (12:30):
I like that.
Speaker 1 (12:31):
I just want you to feel comfortable around dogs.
Speaker 3 (12:34):
We should be working on that for the listener that's
concerned about me, and Gary, for your concern too.
Speaker 5 (12:40):
Let me just say it this way.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
Yeah, there was a time where dogs at airports made
me a little anxious. Now, as a result of various laws,
passing medicinal marijuana being one of them, I find airport's
a lot more relaxing than I used to.
Speaker 5 (12:53):
Let's press on, shall we?
Speaker 1 (12:54):
Okay, we'll move on passing.
Speaker 5 (12:57):
Happy Christmas listeners.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
If you knew how your career would end, Shamo wants
to know, would you do it all over again? Sorry, Eloise,
This is a tough one, yes, Gary, because he was
arrested and convicted as a criminal.
Speaker 5 (13:16):
I'm not going to go into the details.
Speaker 3 (13:17):
As to why, right because it's so pitdling and low
gray that it ruins his story but that's that's the
inference in this question is mate, you you got dragged
out of the joint and the cloud of shame.
Speaker 5 (13:31):
Would you do it all over again?
Speaker 1 (13:33):
Yes, I would. I wouldn't do anything different when I
look back. The only thing I would do different because
I was the investigation was a whim to all investigation.
That's everyone. Everyone knows that. And accused of recording conversations
on my telephone. What a heeneous, heenious crime.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
This is going to grow up, can grow up.
Speaker 1 (13:55):
In a place that there was listening devices. But anyway
you can see I've let that go.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Yeah, and you seen me.
Speaker 1 (14:02):
It was six years, two days, forty seven hours. But
now I would do all things the same. I look
back at my police career and I'm proud of my
police career. I did everything that I wanted to do,
and a whole lot more. I look back at what
I achieved, what I tried to achieve, and how I
approached it. I wouldn't change a thing. The only thing
(14:24):
I would change because I had a lot of open
homicide investigations at the time that my career was ripped
away from me. I would have gone harder, like if
I knew I had a limited time, I would have
gone harder. Now how I go harder, I don't know,
but I would have gone harder if I knew they
were going to rip me away from what I loved
and I did love it. But wise people wiser than me,
(14:45):
including this gentleman's of not point it Spike point Rob,
said don't let it, don't let it break you, and
it's about how you overcome that. And my life now
is great. Where would I be if this is what
an afternoon? I'd likely be the murder scene or in court.
Here I am sitting with you two gems. You've got, Spike,
(15:05):
But no, I'm happy, and I think it's the way
my career had to had to end. People close to me,
people that knew me, and the cops said you and
that because often please when they retire after lengthy careers,
they march out with a pipe band and all that
sort of shit. You were never going to retire that way.
It was always going to be an explosion, and it
felt right for me, and I think I'm a better
(15:28):
person for it.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
I got one question is just to dig in on that,
and it's just because Elouise and I met for lunch
before this, and we're talking about moments of empowerment in
the moment and certain things that our younger selves used
to do to feel empowered. But then reflecting on that
and going, oh, gosh, in the moment, I'm pleased I
did it. Somebody did something to me the other day
(15:51):
and they were out of line and they made me angry.
Speaker 5 (15:55):
But I called them on it in the moment.
Speaker 3 (15:57):
Now reflecting on that, I thought I was right to
call them in the moment, But why did they get
under my skin? And that's the bit that I needed
to get better at the question I'm asking you, Gary,
Yes you do it all again, Yes, you do it
the same way. Are there elements of your management of
your superiors, the people that you had to Are there
(16:18):
different tactics you would use now as an older, wiser man,
Because I know you you are pretty bullish in the cops.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
So I was right to say you're a bulldog.
Speaker 5 (16:30):
You again.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
A double check that I was.
Speaker 5 (16:36):
Obviously. The tricky thing in the room is I still
haven't named the dog you are, Eloisy. Gosh, that's dangerous
territory from then in these days.
Speaker 1 (16:44):
But I will get there.
Speaker 5 (16:46):
But over here, So that's a serious question. Gary.
Speaker 3 (16:49):
You are as a detective working inside a structure, there
are people that you report to and sometimes those people
didn't earn or have your respect. Would you behave differently
in those circumstances to get more of what you want to?
Speaker 1 (17:02):
I could have taken a different path. I could have
manipulated people. I could have sucked up the people that
I didn't respect, but then I wouldn't respect myself. So
in an answer to it, one lesson I've learned, and
I do get invited to talk about leadership and different
things like the pressure of leadership running the big jobs.
(17:22):
Never I warn people, don't underestimate someone a junior person
that's trying to undermine you, that might be a lazy
person that you have no respect for whatsoever, because they
are as driven to bring you down as you are
driven to actually do your work. And that's there's an
old saying, what is it? One rotten apple spoils the crate,
And that can be in a team environment. In regardless
(17:46):
to policing, I prefer to take the consequences then to
give people respect that don't earn respect, that's too important
in the cops. I can do that in friendship circles
or whatever, and you let bygones be by, But twenty
five years in homicide, No, you don't make mistakes. And
if you're making mistakes out of laziness or because you're
(18:07):
greed and blind ambition, I'm going to call you on it.
But yes, my life could have burned like he's here
and yeah, and I'd probably be more liked that.
Speaker 4 (18:16):
That's also part of it, is being liked and pissing
people off because you do have an opinion or you
also want to stand your ground and not like, you know,
back down when things are we or didn't go the
way that they should have gone.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
You know, one hundred percent. And I saw something. It
was just a clip on the social media, Matthew mcconachie
talking about been a nice man or a good man
and what's the difference. Anyone can be a nice man.
I could have been a nice man in the cops
and people could have liked me. I can be friendly
and people like me. But a good man makes a
hard choice sometimes, and that separates a good man from
(18:51):
a nice man. I prefer to be in the brackets
of a good man and a nice man or a
bald man or a baldman. Well, yeah, in hands, you shouldn't.
You shouldn't talk for a number of resistance.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
You know, I walked into it into a service station
the other day and I looked at the security and I.
Speaker 5 (19:11):
Looked, literally looked up and thought, poor bastard.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
Who is that poor man looking?
Speaker 1 (19:18):
That's there? They are confront they.
Speaker 3 (19:22):
I want to know what camera why body dis morphia
doesn't work on a security camera, because when I look into.
Speaker 5 (19:31):
A mirror, I'm like, this is all okay. But if
I'm looking at it from a different it doesn't lie
the way my.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 3 (19:39):
All right, so that's that's a nice name for your
next podcast though, Gary nice Man, good Man bald Man.
Speaker 5 (19:49):
All right, Now here's a question for everyone. Here's a
question for everyone without notice. If you could.
Speaker 3 (19:55):
Reform one law, what would it be? That's and Jess MacArthur,
we thank you for that question. Okay, if you could
reform one law, what would it be?
Speaker 1 (20:09):
Listening Devices Act? I'd throw that out. That's what one law?
And this is this is serious. But I've covered a
lot this year on child sexual abuse. Yes, and every
time I sit down and speak to someone that's been
a victim of child sexual abuse or someone that's been
impacted on it, a survivor, A survivor, yeah, and they
(20:30):
like to have that reference as survivor. But the one
thing when the perpetrator is caught, everyone goes, yeah, I
know that bloke was a bit weird. I know that,
or people were aware of it and didn't report it.
I'd like to see legislation come in where it's in
statute that if you don't report, like if you know
a murder's been committed, it's hinder an investigation or aid
(20:52):
in the bet if you're not providing information. I think
we need to bring that in for child sexual abuse cases,
if someone knows and it might be the wife, it
might be the brother, it might be someone or even
the friends that suspect, and you haven't come forward with
that information. Like there's a disclosure for teachers and medical people,
but I think the responsibility needs to be on everyone.
(21:14):
Really got to crack down on that. Yeah, yeah, it's.
Speaker 3 (21:18):
An interesting one off the bat, it sounds sensible immediately,
there's difficulties with regards to prosecuting about what they know. Yes,
and so then you're jumping straight into a thought crime area.
Speaker 5 (21:30):
Ye, so there's real, real red flags. They're just on that.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
I get that because you can't have thought laws. But
I think we need to make people accountable if you're
aware of it and you've turned the blind eye to it.
And then there's been cases of people sitting here and
it's clear as day people close to the perpetrator were
aware that this was carrying on. They escape prosecution, their
lives turned up side down because the person's convicted. But
(21:57):
the impact it has on the people that have been
sexually abused as children, it just plays out for the
amount of people in jail, the percentages in jail that
have been sexually abused, or their life goes off track
with mental health issues, drug dependency, that type of thing,
alcohol dependency. A lot of it stems back from child
(22:17):
sexual abuse. And I had someone in here just the
other day and I think one in five males are
sexually abused and one in three as children, which.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
Are so to my eye, it's the only crime that
actively produces more crime.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
Well, yeah, that's what's going to say.
Speaker 4 (22:38):
When you say there's people in jail, they have been
Usually that's the starting point of the trauma from that.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
Yeah, And it's a lot of them are the big
tough gangsters that the bikis, the muscle up bikis. And
when you strip it down, why they went that way.
I never want to be a victim again, and they's
ever going to abuse me again, and they try and
find their tribe and they present that way and you
see the amount of people in jail that's happened to,
and that's why they've gone down that path.
Speaker 3 (23:06):
Yeah, and so if we do have listeners, there's a
lot of resources out there. When I say a lot,
not as many as there should be. I'm an ambassador
for Sampson Survivors and Mates Support Network. We support male
survivors of childhood sexual abuse. So you can go to
the Samson website. That's s a MSN. They do extraordinary work.
(23:27):
So if you're out there listening, the chances are you
haven't spoken of this. So many people don't and it's
you know, thirty five years I think is the average
before disclosure. So if you are sitting out there, you're
not alone. You don't need to be alone, and there's
people that can help.
Speaker 1 (23:42):
So please good advice.
Speaker 5 (23:45):
A law that you would change.
Speaker 4 (23:47):
Well I should, I mean, look something that I it
really got. It's something that really really is. It makes
me really angry and upset. And the domestic violence, the
DV cases, the amount of women that are killed in
this country every years. I feel emotional even just it's
like a shiver runs down my spine even when I
talk about it. I just I don't really know the
(24:09):
exact laws. I have some friends that have had to
take out abos and it's just sorry to swear, but like,
what the fuck does that do? I just don't think
it does enough. And I just wish there was something.
I mean, I would love to know, Like I wish
I knew more because I mean, who I mean, God,
I hope, but there's the amount of my friends that
(24:30):
haven't even gone to the to the police, maybe because
I don't feel safe or they don't feel like they'll
be heard. And unfortunately, it does look like there's a
lot of cases where that does happen, and I just
wish that there was I don't know, is what's the solution?
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (24:45):
There is a solution. That's something that I've been championing
and pushing it had Hannah Clark's parents on Clark from Coeensland.
That was the tragedy of her partner that killed her,
set her a lot in three children up up in Queensland.
It was like red flags. It was obviously something was
going to happen. It was obvious to everyone something was
(25:06):
going to happen. The AVOs had been taken out, and
I raised it with Hannah's parents. I said, if an
ankle bracelet, the tracking device was put on this person
when the offender, when he was stalking and coming back
to Hannah wheld have that made life easier? And they said,
if Hannah knew that he had come within a five
kilometer radius, that would have given us all peace. And
(25:28):
then the naysayers go, but yeah, what if he takes
it off, Well, if he takes it off, Hannah would
have got notified. Yes he's on the loose, we don't
know where he is, but it would give victims. And
I'm using Hannah because people know the gravity of that
particular case. Absolutely, eye for the life of me, don't
see why there's domestic situation AVO is taken out. Let's
(25:51):
give a little bit of leeway. Like most people will
abide by the AVA hopefully if they don't very first time,
we don't have to send them straight to prison.
Speaker 4 (26:00):
Ankle brace I've said the same thing about the ankle bracelet, Garry.
As soon as you said that, I as almost I
was saying it to my friend who's also a comedian.
She's had to take an av O out on an
ex partner, and my first thought almost sounds funny to
be like they should walk out with walk around with.
Speaker 2 (26:14):
Ankle bracelets on, and because I think other.
Speaker 4 (26:17):
Women should be aware of what these men have done, well,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (26:20):
There's almost a part of that as well.
Speaker 4 (26:22):
It's like you want to treat women this way, you
should walk around and people should be like that guy is,
you know, maybe could be dangerous or like they should
be monitored because they've done this dodgy behavior.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
Even not shaming them with the ankle bracelet. It's about
the protection. And magistrate was on here as well and
I pose that question with him, So it doesn't even
have to be an ankle bracelet. Yeah, Like in COVID
we could track everyone that poor bloke was trying to
buy the barbecue COVID that was tracked all around Sydney.
Speaker 5 (26:53):
It was a heartbreaking day for any barbecue.
Speaker 1 (26:57):
We tracked him when he had COVID. That was cheesy
head commit all around.
Speaker 3 (27:02):
That was much aspirational about that behavior.
Speaker 1 (27:06):
Yeah, yeah, but I think and with technology, let's embrace it,
like I embrace it and look where it got me
too much.
Speaker 3 (27:16):
Let's be clear, he says, he embraces technology. This is
the time that we're working under. For those of you
that are looking at the swear it's like an egg.
Speaker 5 (27:28):
Yeah, he embraces a school.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
Yeah, and we like that.
Speaker 1 (27:32):
We like, I just thought a little bit of retro.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
We love a bit of retro.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
We love it because sometimes anyway, you know, it's I.
Speaker 4 (27:39):
Agree for me, there's something just so frustrating to see
these multiple cases where like and I I wish it
was a case of you know, oh yeah, give him
another chance, and it's like kind of like sure, but
at the same time it has there has to be
like I don't know what what can there? What can change?
You know what I mean that something has to change
because it's really bad, you know, and.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
When you look back, it's like murder in slow motion.
A recent one now that hasn't played out in the
current this court, but was Audrey Griffin who was murdered
on the Central Coast, nine one year old walking home and.
Speaker 5 (28:13):
I think about her every time I drive past the hotel.
Speaker 1 (28:16):
It's on the way home, and the person and I've
been We had Kathleen on the podcast, a mother and
she's devastated, and I'm working with Kathleen. But the frustrating
thing there is that he breached Ava's for a domestic situation.
This was just an angry man walking around and Audrey
just happened to be in the wrong spot at that time,
and it could be prevented. But I think ankle bracelets,
(28:39):
and I'll keep saying that one time and it'll sinking
in that speech.
Speaker 3 (28:43):
This conversation speech actually to a question from Holly de Boor.
She's asking, why do you think there has been a
spike in intimate partner homicide? Now, first of all, has
there been a spike or are we just getting it
reported more clearly?
Speaker 1 (28:59):
Yeah? Look, statistically, I think they had a not a demonstration,
but a thing at Martin Place the other other day,
and forty one women have been killed this year. Because
they had shoes out for each person that been killed
by someone involved in an intimate relationship. I don't know
if the figures have gone up. I know homicide figures, yeah,
(29:21):
annually were fairly stable. But where the domestic side of it?
But does it really matter too There's too many. There
is definitely too many, and we need to do something
about it.
Speaker 4 (29:33):
I think that's also a thing of don't I hope that,
you know, the conversation is changing when we're talking to
like men and young men growing up, you know, about
consent and about respecting women and all that.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
I hope that's all changing.
Speaker 4 (29:47):
I think that's also there's something going on with men
at a c like almost there's are grown men.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
It's something we can.
Speaker 4 (29:53):
Take them to school and go, hey, you shouldn't do that.
It's sort of where do we change the dialogue around it?
Or I don't know, is there a way to edge?
Speaker 5 (30:00):
Yeah, very much. I've gone through a bit of this stuff.
Speaker 3 (30:03):
So I've got twenty one year old sons, and obviously
I'm biased, but they give me such great hut for
the future with regards to actual conversations around consent, understanding
the environment, power dynamics, they seem a hell of a
lot more advanced in those conversations.
Speaker 5 (30:25):
Now for listeners out.
Speaker 3 (30:27):
There, obviously you know, we see a lot of beautiful
young boys and we can see a lot of grumpy
teenage boys. Now this speaks to what Anna Rubinstein from
the Rights of Passage Institute and he's set up there
at Mullumbimby and he runs these extraordinary courses called the
Making of Men courses. Now, Anna Rubinstein is a very
(30:47):
well credentialed psychologist and amazing man. And I did his
course with my sons at the age of fourteen, the
Making of Men course.
Speaker 5 (30:55):
We went up to mullum Bimby.
Speaker 3 (30:57):
It was four nights, five days on the hill Arnes's
property up there, and it's their boys and there's significant
men in their lives, so it's not everyone's got a dad.
What that camp did for me and my sons was
quite extraordinary. Now, just to give you an insight. Now,
obviously what goes on the hill stays on the hill.
But it's not about abseiling and camping and going, oh,
(31:20):
you know, chop up the wood sun. It's literally you're
talking about it's tpe's fire, talking sticks and tears. Love
that that first question you get asked, the boys are
sitting around the TV or the men are sitting around
the fires in the middle, and the facilitator says, men,
I'd like you to talk to us now about what
(31:40):
your relationship was like with your dad when you were
the boys age now. The first person to get that
stick then talks about their relationship with their dad. Well,
you can imagine there's twenty men in that TP, very
different sorts of relationships, and they start speaking were pretty
soon unbidden, the tears come, huge amount of emotion.
Speaker 5 (32:01):
What's really interesting.
Speaker 3 (32:02):
Then the next part of that process, the facility to
stay to says, boys, you have all just heard twenty
different versions of a father son relationship. Let's pretend now
that if you grow up and you have a son
and you are here, what would you like your son
(32:24):
to say about the relationship ship he has with you? Now,
what that question does is fascinating. A It allows the
boys to say, this is the stuff that's really important
to me. That's the obvious stuff, and the dads can
hear that. But the most important part of that question,
to my.
Speaker 5 (32:38):
Ear, is is this.
Speaker 3 (32:39):
It asks those fourteen year old boys to imagine themselves
as a dad, and it puts themselves on a timeline
of fatherhood of what now, I'm not saying becoming a
father is the only way to become a man's And
I don't suggest for an instant that men out there
with out children haven't progressed in any way, but this
is specific to this. So I offer that that went
(33:04):
for an incredible amount of time. Then we talk about death, challenges, grieve,
all of these sorts of things, But what it allowed
most of all, the dads came away learning a hell
of a lot more about how to let things play out,
how to not control situations, how to respect their sons
are different from them, respecting that different energy coming and
(33:25):
learning to hold that up rather than try and make
those men as good as they can be through their eyes,
because it's boys only live through their own eyes. So
that's a long winded answer to are there different ways?
Speaker 4 (33:41):
I think it's a great, great way to know that
this is the issue of domestic bands is a male issue,
like it's a male issue in.
Speaker 3 (33:48):
The fact that I'm sorry, so so no, no, I
think it's an environment no.
Speaker 4 (33:53):
Yes, yes, but as in sorry, it's a it's something
that I think it needs to be. These men need
to call out of men. We need to be talking
the fact that there is this yes, you know what
I mean. It's this thing of I love this idea
that there are places that men can go and they
talk about these things. And it's almost almost the same
as the whole people being accountable for when they hear
(34:16):
about like a child being abused. You know, I want
men to call out other men if they're just being
inappropriate about women, or because it starts somewhere, where does
this all start?
Speaker 2 (34:25):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (34:26):
The conversations and as someone who and I won't name him,
but his life was touched by domestic violence and lost
someone that he was close to. He was talking about
he said, Gary, like, think about it. He was a
football player. Think about it when you go out the
football team drinking after a game and someone's bad mouthing
their wife at home. Who was at Art's the wife,
(34:47):
she wants me to go home. Little things like that,
or where men say things derogatory that we.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
Should check them with microaggressions.
Speaker 1 (34:56):
You don't talk about your wife like that. Yeah, that
type of thing, because there was a culture where that
was acceptable and funny, and you know it needs to
we need to sort of jump on it so people
aren't comfortable.
Speaker 3 (35:08):
For the listener, i'd say, and Eloise, I would say,
I've been involved in a huge number of conversations in
moments where those little checks have happened.
Speaker 4 (35:16):
Yeah, which I love and I can see, especially from
YouTube that I can I can tell that you would
be the kind of men that would do that and
call out unsavor.
Speaker 3 (35:26):
For him because if I disagree with him, he can
just smack. I'm just saying he's got some some assets.
Speaker 2 (35:37):
But you can be a bit scary.
Speaker 1 (35:39):
But I'll delve deeply into that because I've watched watched
Rob and my you know, you said, well, I've change
anything in the Cops, changed something in me personally is
that I let things faster, so you might offend me.
I'll let that slide. Then you offend me again, and
you offend me again, and then I just don't leash. Yeah,
whereas I've seen Rob, you addressed the very early in
(36:01):
the piece, and I think that that's a smarter way
of doing it. I want to be able to do that.
I'm just not good at it.
Speaker 2 (36:06):
But we're talking about.
Speaker 4 (36:07):
That literally, this whole idea of letting these little things manifest,
and you start to get a little bit like, yeah, boy,
I'm going to say something, but it is better almost
to just go why did you say that?
Speaker 2 (36:17):
Like that? I've always greeted with curiosity.
Speaker 1 (36:19):
You know. I've seen rob do that time and time again,
and you know, even when they set up the stage,
something's not right, and I'd be prick, what is he
here on? Yeah, or something like that, whereas Robert just
call it on. I'd sit there and stew on it
and then probably overreact by the time.
Speaker 2 (36:38):
Look, I'm Greek Macedonian background.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
I passion in the world doesn't hurt.
Speaker 2 (36:44):
But he'll be like this, I'm passionate now.
Speaker 3 (36:47):
So I am a believer in trying to say things
in the moment, but I also recognize it's the hardest
thing in the world. There's a great example. In fact,
I'm going to do the first of my plugs. Okay,
well this is a new one, so I didn't tell
you this. Our podcast is about to get launched, which
is Brave Words, the podcast, which is true stories told well.
Speaker 2 (37:09):
And what does he tell them?
Speaker 4 (37:10):
Well?
Speaker 2 (37:11):
I show.
Speaker 3 (37:15):
That's a different show too. But Gary saw my ultra
solo show Willing Participate. You saw at least three times I.
Speaker 1 (37:23):
Just bought people long to be popular because I guarantee,
and everyone on the board long loved it.
Speaker 3 (37:30):
This though, this is a story in my wife wrote,
and it's actually the first story that we're leading off
with the Brave Words podcast. The story is called Jabrovnik,
and she tells a story about her and I going
on a holiday to Eastern Europe and the first holiday,
first long holiday.
Speaker 5 (37:44):
Away without the children. And look, it didn't start well,
didn't start well.
Speaker 3 (37:50):
There was a whole there's a whole lot of things
involving pumpkin soup, me reading a book when I shouldn't
have been reading a book, Just a whole of little
things going on, and.
Speaker 5 (38:02):
It was difficult.
Speaker 3 (38:03):
It was tough, but Adrian mentioned the things at the
right time, and then going right back in time to
a moment in our relationship where things were very difficult.
Speaker 5 (38:15):
And this is just a couple of years after the boys.
The boys were two.
Speaker 3 (38:19):
So I think a lot of young families know this
feeling where the children are too. Something's going on and
it's just like and you can turn into islands and
then those little things cannot get said. I will be
forever grateful to my wife. It wasn't in the middle
of a fight. We weren't in the middle of a rage.
(38:41):
She didn't use something to weaponize me. I'd actually just
cooked dinner and was putting it on the table and
she said to me, and I looked at it and
she was crying.
Speaker 5 (38:50):
I said, what's up? And she says, sometimes I don't
think I'm kind enough to you.
Speaker 3 (38:54):
And I'm like, oh, baby, that's beautiful, she said, because
I don't think I like you very much.
Speaker 5 (38:58):
Now, that was never marry.
Speaker 3 (39:01):
Never marry a writer, because you're you're on ten to
hooks until the end of the goddamn.
Speaker 2 (39:06):
That's almost poetic.
Speaker 5 (39:10):
So she just slept, but she was unhappy. Now.
Speaker 3 (39:15):
There was a couple of sentences in that particular thing
that I'll never forget. Later on in the in the things,
I was trying to get a temperature read on where
my life was at, because I didn't see it coming,
and I was it was terrifying, terrifying. I said to
a baby, I got to know, where where do you
think we're at? And she looked at me and she said, well,
I don't want us to split up, and I'm like.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Relief.
Speaker 3 (39:35):
And then she says, but at the moment, I can't
see how we can stay together. There is I mentioned
all that is because she mentioned it before she'd emotionally
left the relationship. She mentioned her before she'd figured out
her own plan, because when you're in a couple relationship
(39:58):
with children, that plans not yours to make alone. And
it's the hardest thing to invite the fucker that you're
hating right now to help build that plan. And she
had the strength and the vulnerability to reach out and go,
I don't like you, but we made these choices.
Speaker 5 (40:20):
I can't figure it out. Maybe we can together.
Speaker 3 (40:24):
And so I try and put all of these things
into some sort of perspective, because it's one thing to.
Speaker 5 (40:28):
Say, yeah, you should say it.
Speaker 3 (40:31):
In the moment, but more often than not, if we've
been somebody's done something nasty to us, we're just seeing
white mate. You can hardly breave. There's no logic there.
So go easy on yourselves if you can't check it
in the moment, but please try and remember the power
of doing it. Because my wife saved our relationship. And
my twenty one year old boys right now coming home,
(40:52):
they just finished university and they're going to come home
to a happy, beautiful household, and I can't tell you
the power and joy that brings me.
Speaker 2 (41:00):
That's a very good example as well.
Speaker 3 (41:03):
Now, just with regards to the one law I would change,
everybody has to wear anklets. Everyone has to wear everyone everyone.
That way, we can just switch toggle them on and off.
Speaker 5 (41:15):
As we wanted to make all your plans. He eats easier.
Speaker 1 (41:19):
Fine, you get an electric shock if you've done.
Speaker 2 (41:24):
That's nice.
Speaker 1 (41:25):
I think.
Speaker 3 (41:25):
So you're speeding and your anklet goes off and you go, hey, guys,
it's Gary Jubilan here.
Speaker 1 (41:35):
I want to get more out of I Catch Killers.
Then you should head over to our new video feed
on Spotify where you can watch every episode of Y
Catch Killers. Just search for Eye Catch Killers video in
your Spotify app and start watching today.
Speaker 3 (41:50):
Okay, here's another question, and this might be relevant to
you as well, Eloise. Do you Gary ever get recognized
on the streets?
Speaker 4 (42:00):
Oh here fame David Bowie.
Speaker 5 (42:07):
Gary.
Speaker 1 (42:09):
Yeah, yes I do. And it's a funny. I won't
call it fame because that sounds a little bit stupid,
but no variety people know who I am because of
the world I've mixed in. Getting recognized is not often
the good thing because these.
Speaker 3 (42:24):
People you're telling me I sleep at his place, in
his place when there was a couple of hits out
on it.
Speaker 2 (42:31):
No, and that's so, this is so.
Speaker 3 (42:34):
You don't want to be near it anyway.
Speaker 1 (42:37):
So when people come up to me and say, you
Gary Judlin, that's sort of well, maybe the thing exactly.
I've had some ones where these are people that have
clearly spent some time on the other side of the
law and all that. I'm not sure what the reaction
is going to be, but invariably it plays out pretty good.
(42:58):
But there's one and I can up at myself because
I think this is funny. I walked down the street,
people can I get a photo? So with a photo
and I think my defense because I have no idea
who I'm in the photo with. If it pops up,
I get in photos with lots of people don't. But
I was. I was invited along to the International Convention Center.
It was the I think it was a fifty anniversary
(43:20):
of the Freedom Bus ride, so the First Nations People
Indigenous community had organized this big function. I knew a
lot of people there, and a lot of people were
asking for photos for different reasons. As I'm walking out
these people, I'm walking out of the International Convention Center,
and people said a fader could get a fato. I
stand up and I'm blushing when I'm selling, and they
(43:50):
looked at me and said, no, could you get a
photo of us?
Speaker 4 (43:56):
That's classic, that's quite cute.
Speaker 1 (43:59):
It was a little bit sure joking American.
Speaker 2 (44:07):
Yeah, your character.
Speaker 3 (44:09):
Eloise Ye, you've been now, I've seen you've done various
things on TV with stuff.
Speaker 5 (44:15):
Do you get.
Speaker 4 (44:15):
Recognized recognized more for my comedy, like as in especially
when places like Sydney or Sydney, I feel like people
are a bit more chill, they don't really do.
Speaker 2 (44:24):
It as much.
Speaker 4 (44:25):
But in Melbourne I feel like people get a bit
more excited because I don't live there, so I think
when I'm there they go hi. And I'll get even.
Speaker 3 (44:31):
Certainly during the comedy festival, during the comedy, but I.
Speaker 4 (44:38):
Even will get messages of like you just walked past
my shop and like love your work, which is so sweet.
Speaker 2 (44:43):
It's really nice. It's usually a really really nice thing.
Speaker 4 (44:47):
I don't feel like it's you know, happens all the time.
You know, I'm not that famous or anything, but the
fact that people recognize me, it's it's still like a
funny thing that even you can feel people almost look
at you, and you you go, are they looking at
me because they know me?
Speaker 2 (45:02):
Or they don't know me? And so every time I
try and do the same.
Speaker 4 (45:04):
Thing, always kind always you know, hi, like always smiling,
just always on the on the proceeder with not caution,
but you know, always.
Speaker 2 (45:13):
Just do the right thing and just in case they do.
Speaker 1 (45:15):
Know it does make you behave better, it does, must
admit like I'm polighter. Yeah, you don't know who, and.
Speaker 5 (45:22):
I've stopped throwing up in public.
Speaker 2 (45:24):
Please I feel that way.
Speaker 4 (45:26):
It sounds so silly, but it's one of those things
where obviously I don't think I'm you know, at the
level of I don't know like Catherine Zeeda Jones or
something like you know what I mean, But there is
something about knowing that people might know you or might
know your work.
Speaker 2 (45:38):
Like it does you start to get a little bit.
Speaker 4 (45:41):
You can go crazy, but just a little bit, like
you're quite You have to be aware.
Speaker 3 (45:44):
I think, behave so tub get observation always so tubes.
Speaker 5 (45:50):
Yes, I've I grew up with it. Yeah, and in
fact I was already you.
Speaker 3 (45:56):
Was a federal politician, so I was already we aware
of a strange prism prior to coming to that, and
I like to believe I had extraordinarily emotionally intelligent parents
that allowed me to navigate that with as little weirdness
as possible.
Speaker 5 (46:13):
This has come to you late, right.
Speaker 3 (46:15):
You were, let's be clear, and middling tradesmen, yes, right,
and then you became an okay beat copper and then
you and then you're pretty good in the tactical staff.
You really hit your jam with the d S and
that was that was it. But again a lot of
(46:37):
that is still behind the scenes. Then, of course you
get a couple of national profiles. What was the change
in your life where you started experiencing as just talked
about because you came from what and Eloise, we'll talk
about this at length later from a normy background.
Speaker 2 (46:56):
As well. So yeah, I can talk about that.
Speaker 1 (46:59):
Tell me from a normy yeah, way, I sit well
with Norman, yeah yeah.
Speaker 3 (47:04):
But to somebody with a profile, can you get granular
with regards to what it does to your head?
Speaker 5 (47:10):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (47:11):
I'm glad it came later, because if it came too
early without the right safeguards around, I could see and
that's why I feel sorry. For these young fellas in
sport or the young women that get this profile very
early and yeah, how I would behave like a dickhead
if Yeah, it was internationally eighteen nineteen, but it came
(47:32):
gradually in the police. In the police it was a
different thing in that people didn't have to like me
I as a policeman. That's I'm doing my job. But
I started to get recognized. Then when the Underbelly TV
series came out, that sort of lifted the level high
where people.
Speaker 5 (47:47):
They made an entire Underbelly series on here that would
have been.
Speaker 1 (47:51):
And so that was sort of new. But I when
I say, I had the shits.
Speaker 3 (47:59):
All about like for those of people when Gary Jubilin
now just expressed a sense of emotional trepidation, little Spiky in.
Speaker 5 (48:08):
The corner gave us one of these.
Speaker 3 (48:11):
It's so cute discuss connected that during the break, we're
going to discuss the primacy of my friendship with you.
Speaker 1 (48:20):
Beatful people would pull you down. There's a tall poppy
syndrome like in the police, Sigua.
Speaker 2 (48:26):
My whole show is at as well, and it.
Speaker 1 (48:29):
Would frustrate me in that you know, you don't have
to be treat me that way just because I've done
something that's got recognized. So there was a bit of that,
But in hindsight, with reflection, I'm glad because it's just
been gradual. And then when I left the Cops, it was,
you know, it was front page everywhere, and yeah, I
would literally I'd be having dinner at a restaurant, someone
(48:50):
to pay for the meal, wow, things like that. But
I've been prepared for it step by step and I
knew not to embrace it or leaving it.
Speaker 3 (49:00):
So it was It does take you to that darkest
day arriving, you know, walk doing that walk to the
thing where you had the toughest moment and the most.
Speaker 1 (49:11):
Beautiful coming along. But the fact that people stop to
say hello, stop to support you, I think I'm lucky
every day with you. That's what. And you know, you
talk the dark moment when I was going to court
and having the TV camera all the way from Central
to down in Center local court in your faces, walking
(49:32):
walk the whole they talk about the walk of shame.
But then when I got there and there's yeah, with
the people, even some of the offenders, that that was
a good thing. So yeah, it does change a change
your view on things, and I find I become a
little bit more insoless sometimes when I'm out and about,
I think I just want to pull the say.
Speaker 4 (49:54):
I relate to that a little bit too. I'm quite
an outgoing you know, like a fun loving thank you,
But I also completely relate to that as well, because
I also think that it's so funny the whole idea
of being perceived, which is something I'm trying to, you know,
delve into in my next show that I'm currently writing.
Speaker 2 (50:11):
So I got to tell me that.
Speaker 4 (50:13):
But just this whole idea of how you're perceived and
even just being aware of that, that's a spooky thing.
Speaker 2 (50:19):
It's quite weird.
Speaker 4 (50:20):
But even me, I can feel that there's people that
they have an idea of what you are. They have
no idea who you are, but they do have an idea.
So there is a part of you that almost wants
to be like, well, if I just pull back, they can't,
you know, make an assumption about me or whatever. It's
quite a especially with the style of comedy that I do, like,
people think that I'm this thing, and it can be
quite I almost want.
Speaker 2 (50:41):
To be like, I'm not really like that, almost, But
what I'm going to do.
Speaker 4 (50:44):
You know, I can't change their minds, you know, in
a two minute conversation.
Speaker 1 (50:48):
But that's that perception, and that's with the when I'm
in the media world now, and I don't think I
would have stepped in if I knew how vulnerable you
were for social media and all that. When I told
my kids I'm doing the podcast and they've gone, oh,
that can be brutal. If it doesn't get well dead,
you'll get get attacked. I didn't know I am at
(51:09):
that point. Now, Well, if someone doesn't you know, if
you get negative comments, so what you get some good comments,
And I don't get too excited about the good comments.
I don't get too worried about the bad comments. Some
of the bad comments are correct too.
Speaker 4 (51:22):
I think was quite interesting when you say social media
and the fact your kid's like, you know, if it
goes bad, do you know? What I find really interesting
is that we're living in a time where we have
a bit of a bit of autonomy over like being
able to say, hey, this is actually what I meant,
like if someone tries to sort of call you out
on something. We actually live in an age where you go, well,
listen to my podcast, I talk about my experience or
if someone goes this is you know. I mean, look,
(51:45):
I'm best friends with Abby Chatfield, who has some really
follow you know.
Speaker 2 (51:50):
Death threats and all these things. These things, but it's
kind of you.
Speaker 4 (51:52):
Know, walking down the street with HER's crazy the way
that people that's when you know that you're with someone,
people are staring, you know. But even this whole idea
of we have this chance to go, hey, this is
not the truth and this is But at the same time,
you do have to you know, people are going to
either like you or're not going to like you, and
you just have to either I don't know, read the
comments and get over it, or just have a really
thick skin or I don't know.
Speaker 2 (52:14):
It's a tough line.
Speaker 1 (52:15):
Yeah, I think I'm getting better at having the thick skin,
and I'm better that I'm at this stage where I'm
prepared and more ground and solid. But I do and
you guys must get it because you perform. When I
do some live talks and that lad in the podcast
or whatever I'm doing, sometimes I feel like I just
want to escape home. You're out, and if I'm performing
(52:39):
or doing a talk on stage, I'm giving it my all,
and then I just want to retreat.
Speaker 2 (52:43):
Sometimes I do the same thing.
Speaker 4 (52:44):
I feel like I used to be, so go out
and I always have to be almost doing.
Speaker 2 (52:48):
It's better to do something than not do something. And
then I find I am as I'm getting.
Speaker 4 (52:52):
Older, much much more, I don't know likely to go
home and just almost have to retreat to recharge the battle.
Speaker 1 (52:59):
There's a nourish that's That's a good way of describing it,
because that's how I describe it. Even even doing podcasts
like that can be draining. I'm doing one a week,
so that's two hours you're talking, and sometimes you walk
away you feel.
Speaker 5 (53:10):
Ordinarily hard work there, Gary, And I know the workers of.
Speaker 3 (53:12):
Australia looking at that, look looking at that two hours.
Speaker 5 (53:19):
God, oh mighty, you poor fella.
Speaker 3 (53:21):
Why don't you sit down and have a cup of
tea with that dog spike of yours? While I left
all of this, all of this, there are swings aroundabouts
to being the camera is still wrong.
Speaker 2 (53:38):
The other side of Gary is not so much nice
and nice.
Speaker 3 (53:42):
The other thing on that I was on the White
Lotus earlier. Yeah, right, And so in terms of a
very amazing in terms of an international splash.
Speaker 1 (53:54):
This is so proud to say you're my friend.
Speaker 3 (53:57):
This is why I mentioned it, because you get on
the world's biggest show.
Speaker 4 (54:01):
Now, even as an actor, this is the funniest Sorry
to come off. The funniest thing for me is people
will play roles and they're acting as a different person
that is not them.
Speaker 2 (54:09):
And people are so I hate to say it.
Speaker 4 (54:12):
Normies, love you normies, but they can be a little
bit stupid and they can actually believe. That's how good
actors are. They believe that this person is real. The
people get from like, you know, the woman in Breaking
Bad playing well to White's wife.
Speaker 2 (54:25):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (54:26):
Well, I know it's banging on message because this is
the space that the story goes. So and look, as
far as a role on a TV series goes, it's
the smallest role I've had, I think since I left
high school. Yeah, but it's certainly the biggest response I've
ever had from being a show. And my phone lit
up like a Christmas tree, messages from all over the world, and.
Speaker 5 (54:46):
For a while ago this is wonderful. It was a
lovely thing to be part of.
Speaker 3 (54:49):
For me, the exciting part was working with Jason and
Parker Posey. So that was amazing actors and it was
all terrific, and of course Mike White. So that's all
going on. And then I get a message a couple
of weeks later from a friend of mine saying, hey, Robbie,
they could have used any other bloody photo. I'm so sorry.
(55:10):
And it was a screen graph a breaking story by
the Daily Mail. Shout out to you hard working men
and women at Daily Mail, what.
Speaker 5 (55:22):
God's work you're doing.
Speaker 3 (55:23):
And the article was it was simply about the devastating
effects of sex tourists in Thailand, right, And I was like,
this is a terrible industry, this is a terrible business,
This is a terrible scourge and Australians are at.
Speaker 5 (55:38):
The heart of it. And then the picture for the
article was of me.
Speaker 1 (55:43):
I saw my beautiful.
Speaker 3 (55:44):
Tie partner from the White Lotus. Now they didn't credit
the White Lotus, they didn't say this is an actor
in the part. It's like Australian sex tourists. Remember this
guy's face.
Speaker 2 (55:55):
Remember this guy's face.
Speaker 3 (55:56):
So we talked about ups and downs of having a
public far Now everyone was like, man, you've got to
sue them, You've got to sue them.
Speaker 5 (56:03):
Just to finish this little bit up. I'm yet to.
Speaker 3 (56:05):
Meet anyone that looks relaxed that suits someone, so I'm
not I want to stay related.
Speaker 5 (56:10):
I'm not going to see them. I took a screenshot
of it.
Speaker 3 (56:13):
For the Gentle Listener at home, and I put it
up on Facebook and I said, friends, with every new
job comes a new opportunity. I'm absolutely thrilled to announce
my new role as the sex Tourism Ambassador for Thailand.
And I'm glad to see that The Daily Mail and
I stand side by side on this important issue.
Speaker 1 (56:36):
That is. So it's a good one.
Speaker 2 (56:38):
That is, Oh my gosh, wow.
Speaker 1 (56:40):
All right, well, no, you're in charge, so you caught oh.
Speaker 5 (56:48):
Just a curse.
Speaker 3 (56:48):
Glad Timer would suggest that we're ready for our mid
podcast break because for those of you that don't know,
for those of us that work two hours a week.
Speaker 5 (56:58):
If we don't, if we don't get to break halfway.
Speaker 3 (57:00):
Through, we go to water and we won't be able
to I guess, walk and drive on those roads you
build and you dig.
Speaker 1 (57:09):
You got me wrong, okay. Spike search search
The public has had a long held fascination with detectives.
Detective sy aside of life the average person is never
exposed to. I spent thirty four years as a cop.
For twenty five of those years I was catching killers.
That's what I did for a living. I was a
homicide detective. I'm no longer just interviewing bad guys. Instead,
I'm taking the public into the world in which I operated.
(00:23):
The guests I talk to each week have amazing stories
from all sides of the law. The interviews are raw
and honest, just like the people I talk to. Some
of the content and language might be confronting. That's because
no one who comes into contact with crime is left unchanged.
Join me now as I take you into this world.
(00:46):
Welcome to the Eye Catch Killers Christmas Special. I'm not
going to say much about what happened during this You're
just going to have to listen. But the guests that
we had on was my good mate Rob Carlton and
Eloise f Toos, stand up comedian and Rob's the actor
mate that I've had on before. Have a listen. It
was a lot of fun. We just talked and talked
(01:07):
and mucked around and had a bit of fun for Christmas.
I hope you enjoy the episode. Welcome to the Christmas
Special of Eye Catch Killers. And I've bought my good
mate my off side of the Spike in Rob Carlton
and Eloi's f tos. Now. The reason I've brought you
guys in. I've been doing true crime all year. I'm tired.
(01:28):
I'm worn out. We've had some heavy stuff, so I
thought we'd lighten it up a little bit for Christmas.
And quite frankly, I am just tired. So I'm going
to throw it over to you guys, as dangerous as
that might be. The podcast is called I Catch Killers,
just so we know the brand name that's around there.
Yeah that's good.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
I feel a bit bond ass.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
You've got into the vibe. There's no rules on I
Catch Killers. You guys are in charge. I'm going to
hand it over here.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
Okay, this should be a completely different podcast if I
was in charge.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Yeah, well, let's hope it's not too good.
Speaker 4 (02:08):
I will say that they would everyone would be a dog. Actually,
if it was my podcast.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Everyone would be Look at spot squad, you know on
that quickly what sort of dog would Gary be?
Speaker 5 (02:21):
Let's play that guy.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
I love this game.
Speaker 4 (02:23):
This is I think this is really keeping it light
and people are already laughing.
Speaker 5 (02:27):
We're keeping this energy.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
I feel like beautiful no plugs too snorty.
Speaker 4 (02:34):
I feel like you'd be like a what are those
ones that look quite scary like they but they have beautiful.
Speaker 5 (02:41):
Eyes land shark.
Speaker 4 (02:43):
Yeah, or even I'm like a bulldog, but like a sleek,
a sleek one, a thin.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
I'll take that nice like it's a nice you know.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
Okay, my takeaway was tough emotionally and tell it. Wow, happy,
that's all you ever hear?
Speaker 5 (03:02):
Gary?
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Yeah, flirting, that's good.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
We've got to keep an eye. Rob flirting?
Speaker 4 (03:08):
Yes, yes, please do not you two flirting with each
other while I'm here.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
I've not spik Yeah.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
Hey listen, if you do see sparks flow over here
with Garry and eye you just gentle.
Speaker 5 (03:20):
We're just a couple of blokes trying to get through
a life.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
I love this.
Speaker 4 (03:23):
They say, you know there's a metal in this. No,
there's a look at this romance.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
Together actually for the listeners, for the listeners at home,
Gary and I, if you're not aware, we do have
a long standing relationship.
Speaker 5 (03:38):
So we've been friends for twenty twenty five years now.
Speaker 3 (03:42):
We started just training together running the hills of Copa
Cabana a couple of mates, and then we just got
chatting and then through that we're just hanging out.
Speaker 5 (03:51):
We share stories.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
Then I mean, then we started working together for the
first time with the Killer's Road Shirt and that was fun.
Speaker 4 (03:58):
We have really did you guys get up to on
that road show? And it was so wholesome, brunches together, yoga,
a lot.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Of driving, driving after parties, wild well.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
One nearly went off hook in Dubble because all the
all the prison guards were out there and if you
want things to get loose quickly, just go out with
the prison guard.
Speaker 5 (04:29):
Gary.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
How much can we say?
Speaker 1 (04:33):
Well, how far we can take it? There were some
late night calls made and then that people were eventually
Spike doesn't want to hear this enough.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Spike having a stretch.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
It's traumatizing. Yeah, so we're phone calls made for missing people,
but they were all.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
Fan everyone got f that's nice and so for those
of you at home wondering why why we're here. So
that's what Gary and I have this long standing relationship.
He said, Look, we want to light this thing up,
We've got this Christmas episode. Will you come in and
spend a couple of hours in the studio with me?
And I thought that sounds onerous, So then I thought,
how much more fun would it be with Eloise f time?
(05:12):
So now there is an Eloise and I know we
met over the course of the last year. Yes, I've
been traveling the country doing fringe festivals with my solo shot.
One of the great joys of traveling the French festival
is to meet all the bright new young things that
are coming through the industry. You're seeing incredibly funny people, smart,
(05:33):
intelligent people. Eloise happily is all of those three.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Oh bless you for saying that.
Speaker 5 (05:39):
And so Eloise shot.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
Now this actually might cast me in a slightly sketchy light.
Speaker 5 (05:46):
Well, let's just hold the funest Okay, Okay.
Speaker 3 (05:50):
Her show is called Australia's First Attractive Comedian.
Speaker 4 (05:56):
Obviously, and if you're watching this, and thank you for
saying that, and if you're watching this, yes you can
obviously you agree.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
No, there's obviously more to the show.
Speaker 3 (06:05):
But anyway, the reason I mentioned it might sound sketches,
I show you this first attractive commitee and I've been
gone say that just curve right, but knowing a little
bit about how the world where I thought all we
were on here, that's really interesting. I went and saw
Eloise's showing perf.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Yes you did.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
I thought it was astonishing. I really loved it was
really interesting and funny and sexy and and vulnerable.
Speaker 5 (06:25):
It was all of these things.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
And then because we were doing the same festivals, we
caught up at Adelaide Festival.
Speaker 4 (06:31):
Allowed to me in Adelaide and no, when I can't
believe because I think you I don't know if we'd
met or you messaged when I was in Perth and
you said I loved.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
Your show, and I was like, oh my god. And
then you came up to me. You said, Eloise and Adelaine,
I went, Robert, I was a big fan of yours,
and I just couldn't believe that you'd come to my show.
Speaker 4 (06:47):
And I was I was actually in shock because I
obviously watched you, you know, be an incredible actor. As
an actor, look up to you and very in awe
of what you do, and so that was very exciting
to me, you know, on the same circuit. And and
the fact that that Rob saw my show and liked it,
and he, you know, was impressed by what and he
also gave me some good advice. He was like, don't
(07:08):
worry about because I this is, you know, me touring
this show in cities that I've I guess.
Speaker 2 (07:13):
I mean, I'm a Perth girl.
Speaker 4 (07:14):
But I was doing it in cities I hadn't played
before or like performed this show before. You know, I
don't do self deprecating humor. That can be quite it's
like the opposite of what comedians usually do.
Speaker 5 (07:23):
It's quite old and brassy. She's up front and she's
just for women. You know, I'm hot, get over it.
Speaker 3 (07:30):
But there was an element of in those earlier shows
where she was just couching it.
Speaker 5 (07:34):
A little bit.
Speaker 3 (07:34):
Yeah, And I was like, Ni, sister, we get it, man,
we know you've been funny, and those that don't, I'll
get on board.
Speaker 5 (07:40):
So just and well, it was the.
Speaker 2 (07:43):
Whole thing of owning it.
Speaker 4 (07:44):
I think it's like with anything, and I think it's unfortunately,
which is what the show's about. The shows about feminism,
and it's almost like this conditioning that we have as
women to be people pleasers. So for me to go
on stage and go I'm actually way too hot to
do comedy and I'm funnier and better than everyone else is.
Obviously it's a very like bold statement. But for me
(08:04):
it was the shows about the response that not only
people but also other comedians gave you when I firstespecially
in Australia, tall poppy syndrome, et cetera, et cetera. But yeah,
it was a really good point because I think it
definitely helped me as I went on doing the show,
because it was sort of me going, this is what
I'm saying. You either get on board or you don't,
and I have to be too with it either way,
you know.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
Joy Yeah, and then a tech that have just missed
the point.
Speaker 4 (08:29):
Yeah they have, they have missed the point and there's yeah,
a lot of layers to it, and.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
It's great for me. Also, I think I had this.
Speaker 4 (08:35):
I think it's very you know, on trend to sort
of have this thing of like, oh, you know, men
don't get it or like you know they're not going
to because on the poster is like me, it's like
a Bond poster.
Speaker 2 (08:44):
It's very it's inspired. It's me in a white bikini like.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
A show for what Robert to someone my age a
bikini and launch.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
It's basically the same thing. And also it's very Doctor No.
Speaker 4 (09:01):
It's a Doctor No inspired like the yellow poster with
the red riding and I love, you know, the Bond
Bond films. But for me it's you know, even putting
up that post, I was like, Oh God, who's going
to come to the show?
Speaker 2 (09:12):
Men won't get it. It's about feminism.
Speaker 4 (09:13):
And then I was telling Rob on the phone the
other day when I went to Edinburgh, I was a
little bit staunch. I had these nights where they it
looked like it was just men in the audience. I
was going, oh, what have I done?
Speaker 5 (09:25):
Well?
Speaker 2 (09:25):
A little bit worried that was the energy.
Speaker 4 (09:27):
And then I said, I said to Robert, I almost
went into staunch, and I was like, I opened the
show doing Basic Instincts. I could to do a parody
of Basic instinct And it's a very sexy, silly show,
but it has a message.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
And I think I was a bit you know what
is this a klu Klux clown meeting? And I was
being really like, you know what do you guys think
this is?
Speaker 4 (09:45):
Like this show's about feminism, you know, so you better
bring your wives, you know, if you come again or
and then that was the night they gave me a
standing ovation.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
I had all these like amazing there was.
Speaker 4 (09:53):
You know, women and queer men further further up in
the in the in the seats, but all these middle
aged men coming up to me after saying, you know,
thank you.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
That was a really thought provoking show.
Speaker 4 (10:03):
So I can't believe that I had this almost this
moment of like I'm judging the audience, I'm doing what
I'm what I don't want them to do to me.
Speaker 1 (10:11):
But challenge of people get together gether reaction totally, which.
Speaker 5 (10:16):
Is why she's here today.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Yes, sorry, Rob, had been thinking of way to reach
out to you for how long? And then I stop.
Speaker 3 (10:27):
So pretty much everyone that caused me in the last
six months is like, man, can I get ellowe's in
on this?
Speaker 1 (10:33):
I say, Rob, do you want to go training? I'll ring.
Speaker 5 (10:37):
Anyway.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
So this is how it came about, was that Gary
said to me, we've got the Christmas Special, We've got
a lot of questions from the listeners, and we've got
all these great questions from your listeners, and there's a
whole stack I really want to get into. So that's
going to be the spine of the show. But I
really did think it would be heaps more fun if
we've got a bright young comic with us and someone
that doesn't know actually to get that stick into our dynamic,
(11:00):
because we can fall into our rhythms. Obviously, we've got
Spike here. In case anyone in taxes.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
That was a Christmas party, I put my invites out next.
Speaker 5 (11:11):
Just on that Gary.
Speaker 3 (11:12):
There's questions about friendships and loneliness in the force and
things like that.
Speaker 5 (11:16):
I do, I wonder and I worry. Is that a
companion animal?
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Spike, Spike, get up here?
Speaker 2 (11:24):
I mean, I hope, so come here, come here, very obedient.
Speaker 5 (11:28):
For the listener. Spoke just came straight to me.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
A couple of things with Spike. Yes, he is a
good friend, and he's a good style of a dog.
We get on well, he's got a personality's a little
bit emotionally withdrawn sometimes.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
Okay for you, you you have your dark clouds.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
We just sit there. He used to be a drug squad,
very good, but he got sacked from the police the
same time I did because he was playing in the
exhibit room.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
We've got a situations.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
The reason I wanted to bring Spike along is when
I did travel with Rob, I thought it's funny how
all dogs like Rob. But Rob doesn't like dogs because
when whenever we're sitting at the airport, you know the
dogs that walk around on the lead, and they always
come up, and every time he sees a dog, he
(12:27):
got very concerned.
Speaker 3 (12:30):
I like that.
Speaker 1 (12:31):
I just want you to feel comfortable around dogs.
Speaker 3 (12:34):
We should be working on that for the listener that's
concerned about me, and Gary, for your concern too.
Speaker 5 (12:40):
Let me just say it this way.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
Yeah, there was a time where dogs at airports made
me a little anxious. Now, as a result of various laws,
passing medicinal marijuana being one of them, I find airport's
a lot more relaxing than I used to.
Speaker 5 (12:53):
Let's press on, shall we?
Speaker 1 (12:54):
Okay, we'll move on passing.
Speaker 5 (12:57):
Happy Christmas listeners.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
If you knew how your career would end, Shamo wants
to know, would you do it all over again? Sorry, Eloise,
This is a tough one, yes, Gary, because he was
arrested and convicted as a criminal.
Speaker 5 (13:16):
I'm not going to go into the details.
Speaker 3 (13:17):
As to why, right because it's so pitdling and low
gray that it ruins his story but that's that's the
inference in this question is mate, you you got dragged
out of the joint and the cloud of shame.
Speaker 5 (13:31):
Would you do it all over again?
Speaker 1 (13:33):
Yes, I would. I wouldn't do anything different when I
look back. The only thing I would do different because
I was the investigation was a whim to all investigation.
That's everyone. Everyone knows that. And accused of recording conversations
on my telephone. What a heeneous, heenious crime.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
This is going to grow up, can grow up.
Speaker 1 (13:55):
In a place that there was listening devices. But anyway
you can see I've let that go.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Yeah, and you seen me.
Speaker 1 (14:02):
It was six years, two days, forty seven hours. But
now I would do all things the same. I look
back at my police career and I'm proud of my
police career. I did everything that I wanted to do,
and a whole lot more. I look back at what
I achieved, what I tried to achieve, and how I
approached it. I wouldn't change a thing. The only thing
(14:24):
I would change because I had a lot of open
homicide investigations at the time that my career was ripped
away from me. I would have gone harder, like if
I knew I had a limited time, I would have
gone harder. Now how I go harder, I don't know,
but I would have gone harder if I knew they
were going to rip me away from what I loved
and I did love it. But wise people wiser than me,
(14:45):
including this gentleman's of not point it Spike point Rob,
said don't let it, don't let it break you, and
it's about how you overcome that. And my life now
is great. Where would I be if this is what
an afternoon? I'd likely be the murder scene or in court.
Here I am sitting with you two gems. You've got, Spike,
(15:05):
But no, I'm happy, and I think it's the way
my career had to had to end. People close to me,
people that knew me, and the cops said you and
that because often please when they retire after lengthy careers,
they march out with a pipe band and all that
sort of shit. You were never going to retire that way.
It was always going to be an explosion, and it
felt right for me, and I think I'm a better
(15:28):
person for it.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
I got one question is just to dig in on that,
and it's just because Elouise and I met for lunch
before this, and we're talking about moments of empowerment in
the moment and certain things that our younger selves used
to do to feel empowered. But then reflecting on that
and going, oh, gosh, in the moment, I'm pleased I
did it. Somebody did something to me the other day
(15:51):
and they were out of line and they made me angry.
Speaker 5 (15:55):
But I called them on it in the moment.
Speaker 3 (15:57):
Now reflecting on that, I thought I was right to
call them in the moment, But why did they get
under my skin? And that's the bit that I needed
to get better at the question I'm asking you, Gary,
Yes you do it all again, Yes, you do it
the same way. Are there elements of your management of
your superiors, the people that you had to Are there
(16:18):
different tactics you would use now as an older, wiser man,
Because I know you you are pretty bullish in the cops.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
So I was right to say you're a bulldog.
Speaker 5 (16:30):
You again.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
A double check that I was.
Speaker 5 (16:36):
Obviously. The tricky thing in the room is I still
haven't named the dog you are, Eloisy. Gosh, that's dangerous
territory from then in these days.
Speaker 1 (16:44):
But I will get there.
Speaker 5 (16:46):
But over here, So that's a serious question. Gary.
Speaker 3 (16:49):
You are as a detective working inside a structure, there
are people that you report to and sometimes those people
didn't earn or have your respect. Would you behave differently
in those circumstances to get more of what you want to?
Speaker 1 (17:02):
I could have taken a different path. I could have
manipulated people. I could have sucked up the people that
I didn't respect, but then I wouldn't respect myself. So
in an answer to it, one lesson I've learned, and
I do get invited to talk about leadership and different
things like the pressure of leadership running the big jobs.
(17:22):
Never I warn people, don't underestimate someone a junior person
that's trying to undermine you, that might be a lazy
person that you have no respect for whatsoever, because they
are as driven to bring you down as you are
driven to actually do your work. And that's there's an
old saying, what is it? One rotten apple spoils the crate,
And that can be in a team environment. In regardless
(17:46):
to policing, I prefer to take the consequences then to
give people respect that don't earn respect, that's too important
in the cops. I can do that in friendship circles
or whatever, and you let bygones be by, But twenty
five years in homicide, No, you don't make mistakes. And
if you're making mistakes out of laziness or because you're
(18:07):
greed and blind ambition, I'm going to call you on it.
But yes, my life could have burned like he's here
and yeah, and I'd probably be more liked that.
Speaker 4 (18:16):
That's also part of it, is being liked and pissing
people off because you do have an opinion or you
also want to stand your ground and not like, you know,
back down when things are we or didn't go the
way that they should have gone.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
You know, one hundred percent. And I saw something. It
was just a clip on the social media, Matthew mcconachie
talking about been a nice man or a good man
and what's the difference. Anyone can be a nice man.
I could have been a nice man in the cops
and people could have liked me. I can be friendly
and people like me. But a good man makes a
hard choice sometimes, and that separates a good man from
(18:51):
a nice man. I prefer to be in the brackets
of a good man and a nice man or a
bald man or a baldman. Well, yeah, in hands, you shouldn't.
You shouldn't talk for a number of resistance.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
You know, I walked into it into a service station
the other day and I looked at the security and I.
Speaker 5 (19:11):
Looked, literally looked up and thought, poor bastard.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
Who is that poor man looking?
Speaker 1 (19:18):
That's there? They are confront they.
Speaker 3 (19:22):
I want to know what camera why body dis morphia
doesn't work on a security camera, because when I look into.
Speaker 5 (19:31):
A mirror, I'm like, this is all okay. But if
I'm looking at it from a different it doesn't lie
the way my.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 3 (19:39):
All right, so that's that's a nice name for your
next podcast though, Gary nice Man, good Man bald Man.
Speaker 5 (19:49):
All right, Now here's a question for everyone. Here's a
question for everyone without notice. If you could.
Speaker 3 (19:55):
Reform one law, what would it be? That's and Jess MacArthur,
we thank you for that question. Okay, if you could
reform one law, what would it be?
Speaker 1 (20:09):
Listening Devices Act? I'd throw that out. That's what one law?
And this is this is serious. But I've covered a
lot this year on child sexual abuse. Yes, and every
time I sit down and speak to someone that's been
a victim of child sexual abuse or someone that's been
impacted on it, a survivor, A survivor, yeah, and they
(20:30):
like to have that reference as survivor. But the one
thing when the perpetrator is caught, everyone goes, yeah, I
know that bloke was a bit weird. I know that,
or people were aware of it and didn't report it.
I'd like to see legislation come in where it's in
statute that if you don't report, like if you know
a murder's been committed, it's hinder an investigation or aid
(20:52):
in the bet if you're not providing information. I think
we need to bring that in for child sexual abuse cases,
if someone knows and it might be the wife, it
might be the brother, it might be someone or even
the friends that suspect, and you haven't come forward with
that information. Like there's a disclosure for teachers and medical people,
but I think the responsibility needs to be on everyone.
(21:14):
Really got to crack down on that. Yeah, yeah, it's.
Speaker 3 (21:18):
An interesting one off the bat, it sounds sensible immediately,
there's difficulties with regards to prosecuting about what they know. Yes,
and so then you're jumping straight into a thought crime area.
Speaker 5 (21:30):
Ye, so there's real, real red flags. They're just on that.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
I get that because you can't have thought laws. But
I think we need to make people accountable if you're
aware of it and you've turned the blind eye to it.
And then there's been cases of people sitting here and
it's clear as day people close to the perpetrator were
aware that this was carrying on. They escape prosecution, their
lives turned up side down because the person's convicted. But
(21:57):
the impact it has on the people that have been
sexually abused as children, it just plays out for the
amount of people in jail, the percentages in jail that
have been sexually abused, or their life goes off track
with mental health issues, drug dependency, that type of thing,
alcohol dependency. A lot of it stems back from child
(22:17):
sexual abuse. And I had someone in here just the
other day and I think one in five males are
sexually abused and one in three as children, which.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
Are so to my eye, it's the only crime that
actively produces more crime.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
Well, yeah, that's what's going to say.
Speaker 4 (22:38):
When you say there's people in jail, they have been
Usually that's the starting point of the trauma from that.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
Yeah, And it's a lot of them are the big
tough gangsters that the bikis, the muscle up bikis. And
when you strip it down, why they went that way.
I never want to be a victim again, and they's
ever going to abuse me again, and they try and
find their tribe and they present that way and you
see the amount of people in jail that's happened to,
and that's why they've gone down that path.
Speaker 3 (23:06):
Yeah, and so if we do have listeners, there's a
lot of resources out there. When I say a lot,
not as many as there should be. I'm an ambassador
for Sampson Survivors and Mates Support Network. We support male
survivors of childhood sexual abuse. So you can go to
the Samson website. That's s a MSN. They do extraordinary work.
(23:27):
So if you're out there listening, the chances are you
haven't spoken of this. So many people don't and it's
you know, thirty five years I think is the average
before disclosure. So if you are sitting out there, you're
not alone. You don't need to be alone, and there's
people that can help.
Speaker 1 (23:42):
So please good advice.
Speaker 5 (23:45):
A law that you would change.
Speaker 4 (23:47):
Well I should, I mean, look something that I it
really got. It's something that really really is. It makes
me really angry and upset. And the domestic violence, the
DV cases, the amount of women that are killed in
this country every years. I feel emotional even just it's
like a shiver runs down my spine even when I
talk about it. I just I don't really know the
(24:09):
exact laws. I have some friends that have had to
take out abos and it's just sorry to swear, but like,
what the fuck does that do? I just don't think
it does enough. And I just wish there was something.
I mean, I would love to know, Like I wish
I knew more because I mean, who I mean, God,
I hope, but there's the amount of my friends that
(24:30):
haven't even gone to the to the police, maybe because
I don't feel safe or they don't feel like they'll
be heard. And unfortunately, it does look like there's a
lot of cases where that does happen, and I just
wish that there was I don't know, is what's the solution?
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (24:45):
There is a solution. That's something that I've been championing
and pushing it had Hannah Clark's parents on Clark from Coeensland.
That was the tragedy of her partner that killed her,
set her a lot in three children up up in Queensland.
It was like red flags. It was obviously something was
going to happen. It was obvious to everyone something was
(25:06):
going to happen. The AVOs had been taken out, and
I raised it with Hannah's parents. I said, if an
ankle bracelet, the tracking device was put on this person
when the offender, when he was stalking and coming back
to Hannah wheld have that made life easier? And they said,
if Hannah knew that he had come within a five
kilometer radius, that would have given us all peace. And
(25:28):
then the naysayers go, but yeah, what if he takes
it off, Well, if he takes it off, Hannah would
have got notified. Yes he's on the loose, we don't
know where he is, but it would give victims. And
I'm using Hannah because people know the gravity of that
particular case. Absolutely, eye for the life of me, don't
see why there's domestic situation AVO is taken out. Let's
(25:51):
give a little bit of leeway. Like most people will
abide by the AVA hopefully if they don't very first time,
we don't have to send them straight to prison.
Speaker 4 (26:00):
Ankle brace I've said the same thing about the ankle bracelet, Garry.
As soon as you said that, I as almost I
was saying it to my friend who's also a comedian.
She's had to take an av O out on an
ex partner, and my first thought almost sounds funny to
be like they should walk out with walk around with.
Speaker 2 (26:14):
Ankle bracelets on, and because I think other.
Speaker 4 (26:17):
Women should be aware of what these men have done, well,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (26:20):
There's almost a part of that as well.
Speaker 4 (26:22):
It's like you want to treat women this way, you
should walk around and people should be like that guy is,
you know, maybe could be dangerous or like they should
be monitored because they've done this dodgy behavior.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
Even not shaming them with the ankle bracelet. It's about
the protection. And magistrate was on here as well and
I pose that question with him, So it doesn't even
have to be an ankle bracelet. Yeah, Like in COVID
we could track everyone that poor bloke was trying to
buy the barbecue COVID that was tracked all around Sydney.
Speaker 5 (26:53):
It was a heartbreaking day for any barbecue.
Speaker 1 (26:57):
We tracked him when he had COVID. That was cheesy
head commit all around.
Speaker 3 (27:02):
That was much aspirational about that behavior.
Speaker 1 (27:06):
Yeah, yeah, but I think and with technology, let's embrace it,
like I embrace it and look where it got me
too much.
Speaker 3 (27:16):
Let's be clear, he says, he embraces technology. This is
the time that we're working under. For those of you
that are looking at the swear it's like an egg.
Speaker 5 (27:28):
Yeah, he embraces a school.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
Yeah, and we like that.
Speaker 1 (27:32):
We like, I just thought a little bit of retro.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
We love a bit of retro.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
We love it because sometimes anyway, you know, it's I.
Speaker 4 (27:39):
Agree for me, there's something just so frustrating to see
these multiple cases where like and I I wish it
was a case of you know, oh yeah, give him
another chance, and it's like kind of like sure, but
at the same time it has there has to be
like I don't know what what can there? What can change?
You know what I mean that something has to change
because it's really bad, you know, and.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
When you look back, it's like murder in slow motion.
A recent one now that hasn't played out in the
current this court, but was Audrey Griffin who was murdered
on the Central Coast, nine one year old walking home and.
Speaker 5 (28:13):
I think about her every time I drive past the hotel.
Speaker 1 (28:16):
It's on the way home, and the person and I've
been We had Kathleen on the podcast, a mother and
she's devastated, and I'm working with Kathleen. But the frustrating
thing there is that he breached Ava's for a domestic situation.
This was just an angry man walking around and Audrey
just happened to be in the wrong spot at that time,
and it could be prevented. But I think ankle bracelets,
(28:39):
and I'll keep saying that one time and it'll sinking
in that speech.
Speaker 3 (28:43):
This conversation speech actually to a question from Holly de Boor.
She's asking, why do you think there has been a
spike in intimate partner homicide? Now, first of all, has
there been a spike or are we just getting it
reported more clearly?
Speaker 1 (28:59):
Yeah? Look, statistically, I think they had a not a demonstration,
but a thing at Martin Place the other other day,
and forty one women have been killed this year. Because
they had shoes out for each person that been killed
by someone involved in an intimate relationship. I don't know
if the figures have gone up. I know homicide figures, yeah,
(29:21):
annually were fairly stable. But where the domestic side of it?
But does it really matter too There's too many. There
is definitely too many, and we need to do something
about it.
Speaker 4 (29:33):
I think that's also a thing of don't I hope that,
you know, the conversation is changing when we're talking to
like men and young men growing up, you know, about
consent and about respecting women and all that.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
I hope that's all changing.
Speaker 4 (29:47):
I think that's also there's something going on with men
at a c like almost there's are grown men.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
It's something we can.
Speaker 4 (29:53):
Take them to school and go, hey, you shouldn't do that.
It's sort of where do we change the dialogue around it?
Or I don't know, is there a way to edge?
Speaker 5 (30:00):
Yeah, very much. I've gone through a bit of this stuff.
Speaker 3 (30:03):
So I've got twenty one year old sons, and obviously
I'm biased, but they give me such great hut for
the future with regards to actual conversations around consent, understanding
the environment, power dynamics, they seem a hell of a
lot more advanced in those conversations.
Speaker 5 (30:25):
Now for listeners out.
Speaker 3 (30:27):
There, obviously you know, we see a lot of beautiful
young boys and we can see a lot of grumpy
teenage boys. Now this speaks to what Anna Rubinstein from
the Rights of Passage Institute and he's set up there
at Mullumbimby and he runs these extraordinary courses called the
Making of Men courses. Now, Anna Rubinstein is a very
(30:47):
well credentialed psychologist and amazing man. And I did his
course with my sons at the age of fourteen, the
Making of Men course.
Speaker 5 (30:55):
We went up to mullum Bimby.
Speaker 3 (30:57):
It was four nights, five days on the hill Arnes's
property up there, and it's their boys and there's significant
men in their lives, so it's not everyone's got a dad.
What that camp did for me and my sons was
quite extraordinary. Now, just to give you an insight. Now,
obviously what goes on the hill stays on the hill.
But it's not about abseiling and camping and going, oh,
(31:20):
you know, chop up the wood sun. It's literally you're
talking about it's tpe's fire, talking sticks and tears. Love
that that first question you get asked, the boys are
sitting around the TV or the men are sitting around
the fires in the middle, and the facilitator says, men,
I'd like you to talk to us now about what
(31:40):
your relationship was like with your dad when you were
the boys age now. The first person to get that
stick then talks about their relationship with their dad. Well,
you can imagine there's twenty men in that TP, very
different sorts of relationships, and they start speaking were pretty
soon unbidden, the tears come, huge amount of emotion.
Speaker 5 (32:01):
What's really interesting.
Speaker 3 (32:02):
Then the next part of that process, the facility to
stay to says, boys, you have all just heard twenty
different versions of a father son relationship. Let's pretend now
that if you grow up and you have a son
and you are here, what would you like your son
(32:24):
to say about the relationship ship he has with you? Now,
what that question does is fascinating. A It allows the
boys to say, this is the stuff that's really important
to me. That's the obvious stuff, and the dads can
hear that. But the most important part of that question,
to my.
Speaker 5 (32:38):
Ear, is is this.
Speaker 3 (32:39):
It asks those fourteen year old boys to imagine themselves
as a dad, and it puts themselves on a timeline
of fatherhood of what now, I'm not saying becoming a
father is the only way to become a man's And
I don't suggest for an instant that men out there
with out children haven't progressed in any way, but this
is specific to this. So I offer that that went
(33:04):
for an incredible amount of time. Then we talk about death, challenges, grieve,
all of these sorts of things, But what it allowed
most of all, the dads came away learning a hell
of a lot more about how to let things play out,
how to not control situations, how to respect their sons
are different from them, respecting that different energy coming and
(33:25):
learning to hold that up rather than try and make
those men as good as they can be through their eyes,
because it's boys only live through their own eyes. So
that's a long winded answer to are there different ways?
Speaker 4 (33:41):
I think it's a great, great way to know that
this is the issue of domestic bands is a male issue,
like it's a male issue in.
Speaker 3 (33:48):
The fact that I'm sorry, so so no, no, I
think it's an environment no.
Speaker 4 (33:53):
Yes, yes, but as in sorry, it's a it's something
that I think it needs to be. These men need
to call out of men. We need to be talking
the fact that there is this yes, you know what
I mean. It's this thing of I love this idea
that there are places that men can go and they
talk about these things. And it's almost almost the same
as the whole people being accountable for when they hear
(34:16):
about like a child being abused. You know, I want
men to call out other men if they're just being
inappropriate about women, or because it starts somewhere, where does
this all start?
Speaker 2 (34:25):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (34:26):
The conversations and as someone who and I won't name him,
but his life was touched by domestic violence and lost
someone that he was close to. He was talking about
he said, Gary, like, think about it. He was a
football player. Think about it when you go out the
football team drinking after a game and someone's bad mouthing
their wife at home. Who was at Art's the wife,
(34:47):
she wants me to go home. Little things like that,
or where men say things derogatory that we.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
Should check them with microaggressions.
Speaker 1 (34:56):
You don't talk about your wife like that. Yeah, that
type of thing, because there was a culture where that
was acceptable and funny, and you know it needs to
we need to sort of jump on it so people
aren't comfortable.
Speaker 3 (35:08):
For the listener, i'd say, and Eloise, I would say,
I've been involved in a huge number of conversations in
moments where those little checks have happened.
Speaker 4 (35:16):
Yeah, which I love and I can see, especially from
YouTube that I can I can tell that you would
be the kind of men that would do that and
call out unsavor.
Speaker 3 (35:26):
For him because if I disagree with him, he can
just smack. I'm just saying he's got some some assets.
Speaker 2 (35:37):
But you can be a bit scary.
Speaker 1 (35:39):
But I'll delve deeply into that because I've watched watched
Rob and my you know, you said, well, I've change
anything in the Cops, changed something in me personally is
that I let things faster, so you might offend me.
I'll let that slide. Then you offend me again, and
you offend me again, and then I just don't leash. Yeah,
whereas I've seen Rob, you addressed the very early in
(36:01):
the piece, and I think that that's a smarter way
of doing it. I want to be able to do that.
I'm just not good at it.
Speaker 2 (36:06):
But we're talking about.
Speaker 4 (36:07):
That literally, this whole idea of letting these little things manifest,
and you start to get a little bit like, yeah, boy,
I'm going to say something, but it is better almost
to just go why did you say that?
Speaker 2 (36:17):
Like that? I've always greeted with curiosity.
Speaker 1 (36:19):
You know. I've seen rob do that time and time again,
and you know, even when they set up the stage,
something's not right, and I'd be prick, what is he
here on? Yeah, or something like that, whereas Robert just
call it on. I'd sit there and stew on it
and then probably overreact by the time.
Speaker 2 (36:38):
Look, I'm Greek Macedonian background.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
I passion in the world doesn't hurt.
Speaker 2 (36:44):
But he'll be like this, I'm passionate now.
Speaker 3 (36:47):
So I am a believer in trying to say things
in the moment, but I also recognize it's the hardest
thing in the world. There's a great example. In fact,
I'm going to do the first of my plugs. Okay,
well this is a new one, so I didn't tell
you this. Our podcast is about to get launched, which
is Brave Words, the podcast, which is true stories told well.
Speaker 2 (37:09):
And what does he tell them?
Speaker 4 (37:10):
Well?
Speaker 2 (37:11):
I show.
Speaker 3 (37:15):
That's a different show too. But Gary saw my ultra
solo show Willing Participate. You saw at least three times I.
Speaker 1 (37:23):
Just bought people long to be popular because I guarantee,
and everyone on the board long loved it.
Speaker 3 (37:30):
This though, this is a story in my wife wrote,
and it's actually the first story that we're leading off
with the Brave Words podcast. The story is called Jabrovnik,
and she tells a story about her and I going
on a holiday to Eastern Europe and the first holiday,
first long holiday.
Speaker 5 (37:44):
Away without the children. And look, it didn't start well,
didn't start well.
Speaker 3 (37:50):
There was a whole there's a whole lot of things
involving pumpkin soup, me reading a book when I shouldn't
have been reading a book, Just a whole of little
things going on, and.
Speaker 5 (38:02):
It was difficult.
Speaker 3 (38:03):
It was tough, but Adrian mentioned the things at the
right time, and then going right back in time to
a moment in our relationship where things were very difficult.
Speaker 5 (38:15):
And this is just a couple of years after the boys.
The boys were two.
Speaker 3 (38:19):
So I think a lot of young families know this
feeling where the children are too. Something's going on and
it's just like and you can turn into islands and
then those little things cannot get said. I will be
forever grateful to my wife. It wasn't in the middle
of a fight. We weren't in the middle of a rage.
(38:41):
She didn't use something to weaponize me. I'd actually just
cooked dinner and was putting it on the table and
she said to me, and I looked at it and
she was crying.
Speaker 5 (38:50):
I said, what's up? And she says, sometimes I don't
think I'm kind enough to you.
Speaker 3 (38:54):
And I'm like, oh, baby, that's beautiful, she said, because
I don't think I like you very much.
Speaker 5 (38:58):
Now, that was never marry.
Speaker 3 (39:01):
Never marry a writer, because you're you're on ten to
hooks until the end of the goddamn.
Speaker 2 (39:06):
That's almost poetic.
Speaker 5 (39:10):
So she just slept, but she was unhappy. Now.
Speaker 3 (39:15):
There was a couple of sentences in that particular thing
that I'll never forget. Later on in the in the things,
I was trying to get a temperature read on where
my life was at, because I didn't see it coming,
and I was it was terrifying, terrifying. I said to
a baby, I got to know, where where do you
think we're at? And she looked at me and she said, well,
I don't want us to split up, and I'm like.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Relief.
Speaker 3 (39:35):
And then she says, but at the moment, I can't
see how we can stay together. There is I mentioned
all that is because she mentioned it before she'd emotionally
left the relationship. She mentioned her before she'd figured out
her own plan, because when you're in a couple relationship
(39:58):
with children, that plans not yours to make alone. And
it's the hardest thing to invite the fucker that you're
hating right now to help build that plan. And she
had the strength and the vulnerability to reach out and go,
I don't like you, but we made these choices.
Speaker 5 (40:20):
I can't figure it out. Maybe we can together.
Speaker 3 (40:24):
And so I try and put all of these things
into some sort of perspective, because it's one thing to.
Speaker 5 (40:28):
Say, yeah, you should say it.
Speaker 3 (40:31):
In the moment, but more often than not, if we've
been somebody's done something nasty to us, we're just seeing
white mate. You can hardly breave. There's no logic there.
So go easy on yourselves if you can't check it
in the moment, but please try and remember the power
of doing it. Because my wife saved our relationship. And
my twenty one year old boys right now coming home,
(40:52):
they just finished university and they're going to come home
to a happy, beautiful household, and I can't tell you
the power and joy that brings me.
Speaker 2 (41:00):
That's a very good example as well.
Speaker 3 (41:03):
Now, just with regards to the one law I would change,
everybody has to wear anklets. Everyone has to wear everyone everyone.
That way, we can just switch toggle them on and off.
Speaker 5 (41:15):
As we wanted to make all your plans. He eats easier.
Speaker 1 (41:19):
Fine, you get an electric shock if you've done.
Speaker 2 (41:24):
That's nice.
Speaker 1 (41:25):
I think.
Speaker 3 (41:25):
So you're speeding and your anklet goes off and you go, hey, guys,
it's Gary Jubilan here.
Speaker 1 (41:35):
I want to get more out of I Catch Killers.
Then you should head over to our new video feed
on Spotify where you can watch every episode of Y
Catch Killers. Just search for Eye Catch Killers video in
your Spotify app and start watching today.
Speaker 3 (41:50):
Okay, here's another question, and this might be relevant to
you as well, Eloise. Do you Gary ever get recognized
on the streets?
Speaker 4 (42:00):
Oh here fame David Bowie.
Speaker 5 (42:07):
Gary.
Speaker 1 (42:09):
Yeah, yes I do. And it's a funny. I won't
call it fame because that sounds a little bit stupid,
but no variety people know who I am because of
the world I've mixed in. Getting recognized is not often
the good thing because these.
Speaker 3 (42:24):
People you're telling me I sleep at his place, in
his place when there was a couple of hits out
on it.
Speaker 2 (42:31):
No, and that's so, this is so.
Speaker 3 (42:34):
You don't want to be near it anyway.
Speaker 1 (42:37):
So when people come up to me and say, you
Gary Judlin, that's sort of well, maybe the thing exactly.
I've had some ones where these are people that have
clearly spent some time on the other side of the
law and all that. I'm not sure what the reaction
is going to be, but invariably it plays out pretty good.
(42:58):
But there's one and I can up at myself because
I think this is funny. I walked down the street,
people can I get a photo? So with a photo
and I think my defense because I have no idea
who I'm in the photo with. If it pops up,
I get in photos with lots of people don't. But
I was. I was invited along to the International Convention Center.
It was the I think it was a fifty anniversary
(43:20):
of the Freedom Bus ride, so the First Nations People
Indigenous community had organized this big function. I knew a
lot of people there, and a lot of people were
asking for photos for different reasons. As I'm walking out
these people, I'm walking out of the International Convention Center,
and people said a fader could get a fato. I
stand up and I'm blushing when I'm selling, and they
(43:50):
looked at me and said, no, could you get a
photo of us?
Speaker 4 (43:56):
That's classic, that's quite cute.
Speaker 1 (43:59):
It was a little bit sure joking American.
Speaker 2 (44:07):
Yeah, your character.
Speaker 3 (44:09):
Eloise Ye, you've been now, I've seen you've done various
things on TV with stuff.
Speaker 5 (44:15):
Do you get.
Speaker 4 (44:15):
Recognized recognized more for my comedy, like as in especially
when places like Sydney or Sydney, I feel like people
are a bit more chill, they don't really do.
Speaker 2 (44:24):
It as much.
Speaker 4 (44:25):
But in Melbourne I feel like people get a bit
more excited because I don't live there, so I think
when I'm there they go hi. And I'll get even.
Speaker 3 (44:31):
Certainly during the comedy festival, during the comedy, but I.
Speaker 4 (44:38):
Even will get messages of like you just walked past
my shop and like love your work, which is so sweet.
Speaker 2 (44:43):
It's really nice. It's usually a really really nice thing.
Speaker 4 (44:47):
I don't feel like it's you know, happens all the time.
You know, I'm not that famous or anything, but the
fact that people recognize me, it's it's still like a
funny thing that even you can feel people almost look
at you, and you you go, are they looking at
me because they know me?
Speaker 2 (45:02):
Or they don't know me? And so every time I
try and do the same.
Speaker 4 (45:04):
Thing, always kind always you know, hi, like always smiling,
just always on the on the proceeder with not caution,
but you know, always.
Speaker 2 (45:13):
Just do the right thing and just in case they do.
Speaker 1 (45:15):
Know it does make you behave better, it does, must
admit like I'm polighter. Yeah, you don't know who, and.
Speaker 5 (45:22):
I've stopped throwing up in public.
Speaker 2 (45:24):
Please I feel that way.
Speaker 4 (45:26):
It sounds so silly, but it's one of those things
where obviously I don't think I'm you know, at the
level of I don't know like Catherine Zeeda Jones or
something like you know what I mean, But there is
something about knowing that people might know you or might
know your work.
Speaker 2 (45:38):
Like it does you start to get a little bit.
Speaker 4 (45:41):
You can go crazy, but just a little bit, like
you're quite You have to be aware.
Speaker 3 (45:44):
I think, behave so tub get observation always so tubes.
Speaker 5 (45:50):
Yes, I've I grew up with it. Yeah, and in
fact I was already you.
Speaker 3 (45:56):
Was a federal politician, so I was already we aware
of a strange prism prior to coming to that, and
I like to believe I had extraordinarily emotionally intelligent parents
that allowed me to navigate that with as little weirdness
as possible.
Speaker 5 (46:13):
This has come to you late, right.
Speaker 3 (46:15):
You were, let's be clear, and middling tradesmen, yes, right,
and then you became an okay beat copper and then
you and then you're pretty good in the tactical staff.
You really hit your jam with the d S and
that was that was it. But again a lot of
(46:37):
that is still behind the scenes. Then, of course you
get a couple of national profiles. What was the change
in your life where you started experiencing as just talked
about because you came from what and Eloise, we'll talk
about this at length later from a normy background.
Speaker 2 (46:56):
As well. So yeah, I can talk about that.
Speaker 1 (46:59):
Tell me from a normy yeah, way, I sit well
with Norman, yeah yeah.
Speaker 3 (47:04):
But to somebody with a profile, can you get granular
with regards to what it does to your head?
Speaker 5 (47:10):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (47:11):
I'm glad it came later, because if it came too
early without the right safeguards around, I could see and
that's why I feel sorry. For these young fellas in
sport or the young women that get this profile very
early and yeah, how I would behave like a dickhead
if Yeah, it was internationally eighteen nineteen, but it came
(47:32):
gradually in the police. In the police it was a
different thing in that people didn't have to like me
I as a policeman. That's I'm doing my job. But
I started to get recognized. Then when the Underbelly TV
series came out, that sort of lifted the level high
where people.
Speaker 5 (47:47):
They made an entire Underbelly series on here that would
have been.
Speaker 1 (47:51):
And so that was sort of new. But I when
I say, I had the shits.
Speaker 3 (47:59):
All about like for those of people when Gary Jubilin
now just expressed a sense of emotional trepidation, little Spiky in.
Speaker 5 (48:08):
The corner gave us one of these.
Speaker 3 (48:11):
It's so cute discuss connected that during the break, we're
going to discuss the primacy of my friendship with you.
Speaker 1 (48:20):
Beatful people would pull you down. There's a tall poppy
syndrome like in the police, Sigua.
Speaker 2 (48:26):
My whole show is at as well, and it.
Speaker 1 (48:29):
Would frustrate me in that you know, you don't have
to be treat me that way just because I've done
something that's got recognized. So there was a bit of that,
But in hindsight, with reflection, I'm glad because it's just
been gradual. And then when I left the Cops, it was,
you know, it was front page everywhere, and yeah, I
would literally I'd be having dinner at a restaurant, someone
(48:50):
to pay for the meal, wow, things like that. But
I've been prepared for it step by step and I
knew not to embrace it or leaving it.
Speaker 3 (49:00):
So it was It does take you to that darkest
day arriving, you know, walk doing that walk to the
thing where you had the toughest moment and the most.
Speaker 1 (49:11):
Beautiful coming along. But the fact that people stop to
say hello, stop to support you, I think I'm lucky
every day with you. That's what. And you know, you
talk the dark moment when I was going to court
and having the TV camera all the way from Central
to down in Center local court in your faces, walking
(49:32):
walk the whole they talk about the walk of shame.
But then when I got there and there's yeah, with
the people, even some of the offenders, that that was
a good thing. So yeah, it does change a change
your view on things, and I find I become a
little bit more insoless sometimes when I'm out and about,
I think I just want to pull the say.
Speaker 4 (49:54):
I relate to that a little bit too. I'm quite
an outgoing you know, like a fun loving thank you,
But I also completely relate to that as well, because
I also think that it's so funny the whole idea
of being perceived, which is something I'm trying to, you know,
delve into in my next show that I'm currently writing.
Speaker 2 (50:11):
So I got to tell me that.
Speaker 4 (50:13):
But just this whole idea of how you're perceived and
even just being aware of that, that's a spooky thing.
Speaker 2 (50:19):
It's quite weird.
Speaker 4 (50:20):
But even me, I can feel that there's people that
they have an idea of what you are. They have
no idea who you are, but they do have an idea.
So there is a part of you that almost wants
to be like, well, if I just pull back, they can't,
you know, make an assumption about me or whatever. It's
quite a especially with the style of comedy that I do, like,
people think that I'm this thing, and it can be
quite I almost want.
Speaker 2 (50:41):
To be like, I'm not really like that, almost, But
what I'm going to do.
Speaker 4 (50:44):
You know, I can't change their minds, you know, in
a two minute conversation.
Speaker 1 (50:48):
But that's that perception, and that's with the when I'm
in the media world now, and I don't think I
would have stepped in if I knew how vulnerable you
were for social media and all that. When I told
my kids I'm doing the podcast and they've gone, oh,
that can be brutal. If it doesn't get well dead,
you'll get get attacked. I didn't know I am at
(51:09):
that point. Now, Well, if someone doesn't you know, if
you get negative comments, so what you get some good comments,
And I don't get too excited about the good comments.
I don't get too worried about the bad comments. Some
of the bad comments are correct too.
Speaker 4 (51:22):
I think was quite interesting when you say social media
and the fact your kid's like, you know, if it
goes bad, do you know? What I find really interesting
is that we're living in a time where we have
a bit of a bit of autonomy over like being
able to say, hey, this is actually what I meant,
like if someone tries to sort of call you out
on something. We actually live in an age where you go, well,
listen to my podcast, I talk about my experience or
if someone goes this is you know. I mean, look,
(51:45):
I'm best friends with Abby Chatfield, who has some really
follow you know.
Speaker 2 (51:50):
Death threats and all these things. These things, but it's
kind of you.
Speaker 4 (51:52):
Know, walking down the street with HER's crazy the way
that people that's when you know that you're with someone,
people are staring, you know. But even this whole idea
of we have this chance to go, hey, this is
not the truth and this is But at the same time,
you do have to you know, people are going to
either like you or're not going to like you, and
you just have to either I don't know, read the
comments and get over it, or just have a really
thick skin or I don't know.
Speaker 2 (52:14):
It's a tough line.
Speaker 1 (52:15):
Yeah, I think I'm getting better at having the thick skin,
and I'm better that I'm at this stage where I'm
prepared and more ground and solid. But I do and
you guys must get it because you perform. When I
do some live talks and that lad in the podcast
or whatever I'm doing, sometimes I feel like I just
want to escape home. You're out, and if I'm performing
(52:39):
or doing a talk on stage, I'm giving it my all,
and then I just want to retreat.
Speaker 2 (52:43):
Sometimes I do the same thing.
Speaker 4 (52:44):
I feel like I used to be, so go out
and I always have to be almost doing.
Speaker 2 (52:48):
It's better to do something than not do something. And
then I find I am as I'm getting.
Speaker 4 (52:52):
Older, much much more, I don't know likely to go
home and just almost have to retreat to recharge the battle.
Speaker 1 (52:59):
There's a nourish that's That's a good way of describing it,
because that's how I describe it. Even even doing podcasts
like that can be draining. I'm doing one a week,
so that's two hours you're talking, and sometimes you walk
away you feel.
Speaker 5 (53:10):
Ordinarily hard work there, Gary, And I know the workers of.
Speaker 3 (53:12):
Australia looking at that, look looking at that two hours.
Speaker 5 (53:19):
God, oh mighty, you poor fella.
Speaker 3 (53:21):
Why don't you sit down and have a cup of
tea with that dog spike of yours? While I left
all of this, all of this, there are swings aroundabouts
to being the camera is still wrong.
Speaker 2 (53:38):
The other side of Gary is not so much nice
and nice.
Speaker 3 (53:42):
The other thing on that I was on the White
Lotus earlier. Yeah, right, And so in terms of a
very amazing in terms of an international splash.
Speaker 1 (53:54):
This is so proud to say you're my friend.
Speaker 3 (53:57):
This is why I mentioned it, because you get on
the world's biggest show.
Speaker 4 (54:01):
Now, even as an actor, this is the funniest Sorry
to come off. The funniest thing for me is people
will play roles and they're acting as a different person
that is not them.
Speaker 2 (54:09):
And people are so I hate to say it.
Speaker 4 (54:12):
Normies, love you normies, but they can be a little
bit stupid and they can actually believe. That's how good
actors are. They believe that this person is real. The
people get from like, you know, the woman in Breaking
Bad playing well to White's wife.
Speaker 2 (54:25):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (54:26):
Well, I know it's banging on message because this is
the space that the story goes. So and look, as
far as a role on a TV series goes, it's
the smallest role I've had, I think since I left
high school. Yeah, but it's certainly the biggest response I've
ever had from being a show. And my phone lit
up like a Christmas tree, messages from all over the world, and.
Speaker 5 (54:46):
For a while ago this is wonderful. It was a
lovely thing to be part of.
Speaker 3 (54:49):
For me, the exciting part was working with Jason and
Parker Posey. So that was amazing actors and it was
all terrific, and of course Mike White. So that's all
going on. And then I get a message a couple
of weeks later from a friend of mine saying, hey, Robbie,
they could have used any other bloody photo. I'm so sorry.
(55:10):
And it was a screen graph a breaking story by
the Daily Mail. Shout out to you hard working men
and women at Daily Mail, what.
Speaker 5 (55:22):
God's work you're doing.
Speaker 3 (55:23):
And the article was it was simply about the devastating
effects of sex tourists in Thailand, right, And I was like,
this is a terrible industry, this is a terrible business,
This is a terrible scourge and Australians are at.
Speaker 5 (55:38):
The heart of it. And then the picture for the
article was of me.
Speaker 1 (55:43):
I saw my beautiful.
Speaker 3 (55:44):
Tie partner from the White Lotus. Now they didn't credit
the White Lotus, they didn't say this is an actor
in the part. It's like Australian sex tourists. Remember this
guy's face.
Speaker 2 (55:55):
Remember this guy's face.
Speaker 3 (55:56):
So we talked about ups and downs of having a
public far Now everyone was like, man, you've got to
sue them, You've got to sue them.
Speaker 5 (56:03):
Just to finish this little bit up. I'm yet to.
Speaker 3 (56:05):
Meet anyone that looks relaxed that suits someone, so I'm
not I want to stay related.
Speaker 5 (56:10):
I'm not going to see them. I took a screenshot
of it.
Speaker 3 (56:13):
For the Gentle Listener at home, and I put it
up on Facebook and I said, friends, with every new
job comes a new opportunity. I'm absolutely thrilled to announce
my new role as the sex Tourism Ambassador for Thailand.
And I'm glad to see that The Daily Mail and
I stand side by side on this important issue.
Speaker 1 (56:36):
That is. So it's a good one.
Speaker 2 (56:38):
That is, Oh my gosh, wow.
Speaker 1 (56:40):
All right, well, no, you're in charge, so you caught oh.
Speaker 5 (56:48):
Just a curse.
Speaker 3 (56:48):
Glad Timer would suggest that we're ready for our mid
podcast break because for those of you that don't know,
for those of us that work two hours a week.
Speaker 5 (56:58):
If we don't, if we don't get to break halfway.
Speaker 3 (57:00):
Through, we go to water and we won't be able
to I guess, walk and drive on those roads you
build and you dig.
Speaker 1 (57:09):
You got me wrong, okay. Spike search search
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