May 15, 2025 • 57 mins
What if the answers to your biggest questions about your career, relationships, even your health are already inside you? You just haven't learned how to access them… yet. In this episode, New York Times bestselling author and world-renowned intuitive Laura Day (beloved by Demi Moore, Brad Pitt, Fortune 500 CEOs, and Esalen attendees) reveals how to tap into your intuition and start creating the life you actually want. We unpack The Prism, her powerful system for breaking patterns, rewiring your reactions, and making clearer decisions, fast. Whether you're stuck in a loop, lacking confidence, or craving a breakthrough, Laura shows how small shifts can spark massive transformation. She shares:
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What intuition really is (and what it's not)
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How to actually tap into your intuition (and why most people get it wrong)
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How to know what you actually want and how to go after it
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The real reason you keep repeating the same patterns
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What Laura says successful people (Oprah-level successful) all have in common
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Why trauma can sometimes be a doorway, not a dead end
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Why understanding is overrated + action is everything
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How to use your "Prism" to manifest the life you actually want
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How to tell if your "ego" is keeping you stuck—and how to fix it
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Laura's wild experience with military-grade scientific testing on her intuition
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The difference between believing you're magical... and being the magic
Follow Laura here.
Grab a copy of The Prism here.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
No one has all the answers, but when we ask
the right questions, we get a little closer, closer to truths,
closer to each other, even closer to ourselves. I'm journalist
Danielle Robe, and each week, my guests and I come
together to challenge the status quo and our own.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Ways of thinking by daring to ask what if, why not?
And who says?
Speaker 3 (00:30):
So?
Speaker 1 (00:30):
Come curious, dig deep, and join the conversation. It's time
to question everything. Hell, I hope you're having a beautiful,
beautiful week. Today's all about intuition, and we really talk
about intuition a lot, but what is it actually right? So,
(00:52):
psychology today defines it as a form of knowledge that
appears in consciousness without obvious deliberation. So it's not mat
but a faculty in which hunches are generated by the
unconscious mind rapidly sifting through past experiences and cumulative knowledge.
In other words, it's your gut powered by everything you've
(01:13):
ever seen, heard, and lived. But here's the hiccup with that, right,
what if you're cumulative knowledge, the thing that's supposed to
fuel your intuition is actually blocking it. Let's say you
grew up in a tough neighborhood, and people weren't truthful
and were always kind of shady. Now you assume everyone's lying,
(01:34):
or maybe your mom cheated on your dad growing up,
so your gut tells you that your boyfriend probably is
going to cheat on you too. That's not intuition. That's
unprocessed patterning disguised as a hunch. So enter this week's guest,
Laura Day. She's a New York Times bestselling author, a
(01:56):
world renowned intuitive and the Advisor CEO, and celebrities like
Demi Moor and Brad Pitt call on when they need answers.
She's consulted for billion dollar companies, train the military in
remote viewing, and helped people all over the world tap
into their intuition in practical, measurable ways, and her latest book,
(02:16):
The Prism, might be her most personal work yet. She
says intuition is not mystical, it's measurable. She says you
don't need to believe in it to even use it.
And everything you're searching for clarity in your career, your relationships,
even your health, she says, it's already inside of you.
We just haven't been taught how to access it. But
(02:38):
here's the key.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
In order to access it from a clear and grounded place,
we have to understand our prism, the system that we
use to process reality.
Speaker 3 (02:48):
You're your magic wand you think, you do, you connect,
you create, you choose. There is nothing more magic than you.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Laura bill don Freud's idea that our ego begins developing
an early childhood, within the first three to seven years
of life, and then evolves from there. And what she
proposes is that our ego is actually not the enemy.
Speaker 2 (03:12):
Like so much of pop psychology says, what.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
Your prism or ego actually does is it takes. If
you know, we're all into spirituality, but we are in
bodies in a physical world. That's what we're here to master.
So then what the prism does or the ego does,
is it takes that energy we share. Because if you're
just one perfect energy, you're not evolving.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
And while all of this may sound woo woo, Laura
is anything, but her method is grounded in structure and
real world data. She's not really here to talk vibes.
I thought she would be, but she's more interested in
talking about results.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
Part of the problem is everyone's always looking for a
sign you don't need a sign if you decide, if
you are determined.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
So in this conversation, Laura breaks down how to rewire
our responses, shift our patterns, and use intuition as a tool,
not a feeling, to change our lives.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
What do you want to create? Because you can create it,
you don't have to believe in it. It doesn't have
to feel good, it doesn't have to be good. There's
this thing about worthiness. I feel that I'm worthy of love.
Who made a worthiness rule? I mean, look at all
the hideous people who've achieved amazing things. There's no worthiness rule.
If you want it, there's a system to get it.
(04:32):
You are that system, and that is the Prism.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
So today we're circling one big question. What does it
really take to change your life? And how do you
access the intuition that's already inside of you to do it?
It's time to question everything with Laura Day. Laura, I've
been following your work for some time. I'm really excited
to speak with you. Thank you for taking the time.
Speaker 3 (04:55):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Okay, So the Prism, so much of about your work
and this book is about intuition, and you write you
may not know it, but you have the inate ability
to get the information you need about anyone and anything
at any point in time. The idea that we have
everything we need, that we know everything already is something
(05:17):
I don't think. I hear a lot of people talk about.
There's a lot of outsourcing in the self help world nowadays.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
What does that knowing feel like? What should we be
looking out for?
Speaker 3 (05:28):
I think we trap ourselves in a lot of useless paradigms,
and so we think we're making changes, but we're not really.
What is so important and the prism starts with this,
as does any productive intuitive work. What are your goals?
You know, if you were both bow and arrow, what's
your goal's eye? So when people start a process, it's
(05:53):
so important to know where you're going, and then to
not get frustrated with yourself because the reality is you
can't change from within. You know, we're taught to naval gaze,
and you really you can't change from within. You need
a catalyst. Your patterns hold you together, but they also
hold you in place, and so there are many ways
to find a catalyst. Intuition is really the only way
(06:18):
that you can do alone.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
Is it true that women are able to tap into
their intuition more naturally.
Speaker 3 (06:25):
No, actually that is a huge fallacy because intuition is
a detached state. Intuition is the ability to get data.
And the way that the traditionally female brain works is
that there's a lot of communication between the two hemispheres.
There's actually structurally more connection, and so the detachment that
(06:50):
is needed to document information kind of without bias, is
less effective in the traditionally female brain. There are other
things that, of course that brain is more effective for,
certainly more effective for certain intuitive skills like telepathy and mediumship,
which is the ability to literally become something else. But ladies,
(07:13):
that also has a downside, you know, which I think
is so important to get into and in the prism
I get into it because it has someone else driving
your vehicle.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
Well, I think you're hitting on the cornerstone of your
entire body of work, which is integrating light and dark.
Do you feel like that you had a very tumultuous upbringing.
Speaker 3 (07:34):
I've had two siblings suicide, my mother suicided, my uncle suicided.
Other than having definitely different neurology, we had very abusive childhoods.
And I think that in a sense that either creates
people who survive or who don't survive. But one of
the things that intuition does, and that really is in
(07:55):
many ways the luck of having a certain kind of
brain is it allows the guidance, so to speak. And
I don't mean guidance like spirit guide. I mean you
need to know something above your pay grade. When I
was five, I was alone in an apartment every night
with three younger children and no adult. So you need
to know how to heat a bottle, but you don't
(08:16):
really know how to heat a bottle. And what all
human beings are capable of is intuitively, so leaving the ego,
leaving self, and especially when you're below seven and you
don't really have a self structured yet and just grabbing
into that common energy that we call, you know, spirit,
(08:38):
which science just calls energy. I don't recommend trauma as
an intuitive development tool because many like my siblings, don't
survive it, but it certainly I think points to the fact.
And it's one of my favorite phrases, which is your
pathology can be your potential. You know, you have to
work with what you have, and we're especially younger people.
(09:02):
With the Internet and with social media, you think people
have all of these things that you need, and actually
you are a perfect version of you. And when you
learn to market that, so to speak, whether it's in
love or in business, or to have a skill that
(09:23):
rewards you economically, when you are your you and you
market that well using intuition to the world, you create
a life that is great for you.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
I like that you say that intuition is a skill
that has been my experience. I'm wondering what you're able
to share for all of us that are still working
on it. What is the first step if you're not
in touch with it.
Speaker 3 (09:51):
If you're not in touch with it, what's happening is
your subconscious is using it. Oh, you're still trying to
prove you the smartest person in third grade. You're getting
yourself in trouble, or you're trying to save mommy and
daddy and you're bringing people in who are inappropriate. If
you are not conscious of your intuition, then under your
conscious awareness, it has a dialogue with the world around
(10:14):
you that really just keeps recreating difficulties. You know, it
keeps you really stuck. So the first way to use
intuition consciously is very unmagical. It's what is it you
want to create? And you know when you have a goal,
all you are persistent with that goal. I mean, part
of the problem is we think this, we need this,
(10:36):
we want this, we need to address this. And so
what I ask you to do and in the prison,
really what you do first is you set those three goals.
Because when you have a goal, you have a filing system.
But you also are looking in the right direction. Now,
of course we find what we are looking for. So
(10:57):
it's really important. And the reason that the book is
called the Prism is we are a structure and we're
in a material world with structures. Even relationships have a structure,
all dynamics have a structure, and it is really important
to begin to engage in interfacing with that structure differently.
(11:22):
And it's a tiny change, you know, big changes really
kind of just make messes because we're so complex and
we're connected to everything. So you make a tiny change.
I mean, I don't know if your refrigerator has ever
gone down two degrees, but there's some things that just don't.
Speaker 2 (11:39):
Survive, it's true.
Speaker 3 (11:41):
And so it's really important to have your goals. You
don't have to believe in them. I mean belief is
the big mind f You don't have to believe in everything.
It doesn't have to feel good.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
That's interesting, Oh.
Speaker 3 (11:56):
I think that is such a bad marker. How something
feels I mean, hero feels good. I'm going through your
old patterns, even if when they're painful, often feels really good.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
Okay, But here's my question, because I hear a lot
of people that our great manifestors talk about how you
don't really attract what you want. You attract who you
are and the vibration you're giving out. If you say
that my goal is to be one of the biggest
podcasters in the country.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
But I'm not living there, I'm not feeling it.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
If I don't believe it yet, how am I going
to be able to achieve it?
Speaker 2 (12:34):
What's the disconnect?
Speaker 3 (12:35):
Nothing to do with achievement, you know. One of the
reasons that I write self help is that you again
can't think outside the box. You are the box. But
when you try what someone else who has done something
successful is on, often you find a key that works
for you. Not all of those keys, because we're a
(12:57):
unique but you find a key that works for you.
So if you want to be the most successful podcaster.
I would both listen to successful podcasters and ones that
have really messed up. I would try on things that
are uncomfortable but not dangerous or no new damage damaged
is just wasted time, wasted energy. We all planted how
(13:21):
at our prism, at our structure, but the wonderful thing
is we are always growing. One of the things that
I see so much of my workshops is initially people
are doing that somebody nobody thing at a person so
on that's no one. The reality is we are all one,
and it may be the person who is literally the
(13:45):
last person you consider who has your answer. The important
thing to realize is your answer, and it's really big
now to look at your trauma. Find your trauma, believe me,
go for something that you want that's bigger than any
you've ever achieved. Your trauma is the first person to
the party canavoid it. So I don't believe in positive thinking,
(14:07):
because if a bullet's coming out you, it will definitely
hit you notice it. You need to know the action,
and then you need to take the action. You need
to do those three things. And I know threes are
mystical numbers. People like to mystify. Everything is demagicalize. You're
your magic wand you think, you do, you connect, you create,
(14:30):
you choose. There is nothing more magic than you. And
I think that we really underestimate how much courage it
takes to be alive, to be a human being, to
invest in relationships. I mean, I know, I wake up
every morning because of all the deaths so early in
my life, and I just make sure my husband's breathing,
(14:51):
and if his breathing, that is a good day.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
I love that you mentioned noticing an action. Any positive
stride I have made has been from noticing.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
That is the first step in therapy.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
And also not avoiding your obstacles. I mean, you don't
see what you don't see, and you will. I walk
into walls and I've written seven very successful self help books,
but I still walk into new walls because I'm going
and every time I grow, they are new things I
can't do. There were medial tasks. They are new obstacles
that I didn't know. Oh wow, I thought I solved
(15:25):
that forty years ago, and yeah, here it is just
dressed up differently. And the fact of the matter is
if you engage in empowered realistic thinking and if you
try things on from outside of yourself that are uncomfortable. Again,
that's why I write self help, and that's why intuition
is so important. You will make those changes. You will
(15:49):
get there. Part of the problem is everyone's always looking
for a sign. You don't need a sign if you
decide if you're determined, and then if you're flexible, and
the person takes a lot about the ego, you know
determination isn't going to do it. You're still in the box. Yeah,
be determined, you need to be flexible, and you need
to be resilient because if you're doing something great, you
(16:12):
will get knocked on your bottom.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
I want to dive deeper into the prism because I
think we keep mentioning it. It's the system that you've
come up with that you're sharing in the book. It's
also the name of the book. But how do you
describe what the prism is?
Speaker 3 (16:25):
The prism is your ego. The ego gets a bad name,
but you do have genetics that form you and how
you respond to the world. And how you respond to
the world is both the world you perceive, so you
may not see the whole world here and miss all that,
but it's also how you interact so you're born with
(16:45):
a certain structure, but then the ego, so the I want,
I believe, I am, I see, I interact. Anything with
an eye is formed between conception and age seven, and
then you're locked and loaded and the rest is vision.
And one of the things that I realized when I
was really downloading this, you know, some of my books
(17:07):
I write there based on my experience. All the intuition
books were based on the scientific testing on me as
an intuitive.
Speaker 2 (17:16):
What is scientific testing on you? What does that mean?
Speaker 3 (17:19):
So back in the early eighties, there was a lot
of interest in the extended capacities of the human mind,
mostly for remote viewing for military purposes, although that's not
what we knew, and there were many of us. I'm
not unique, and so my first books were based on
those tests, you know, making the tests into training. That's
how I was trained, not through the esoteric community, but
(17:42):
through the scientific community. And it was great training because
you're either right or you're wrong. There's none of this
kind of murky stuff.
Speaker 2 (17:49):
You're really into metrics and verifiable results.
Speaker 3 (17:52):
You know, the subconscious belief doesn't work. I mean, it
works for a while until you get something that disproves it.
But your subconscious is looking for will this help me survive?
And if it will use it, and if it won't,
it goes back to its old patterns. So it's really
both important for you to have access to yourself and
(18:14):
your abilities to prove it to yourself in the real world.
But it's also important because belief is risky business. You know,
people believe they can fly and you can die that way.
You really need to have again a prism, a structure
where you can reality test and use things that work
(18:36):
time and time again, which doesn't mean everything will be perfect.
You know, how I know I've achieved something is I'm
worried about something new.
Speaker 1 (18:44):
Yes, that's a great point, and I have to tell
you it's very rare. I think for anybody nowadays that
somebody's mind is really changed by a book and idea
a person. You completely changed my mind with this book
because I had always that ego is the enemy, that
your ego is what's getting in the way of prosperity,
(19:07):
of love, of all the goodness in your life and
your light right, and you outline these seven ego centers,
which are based on the chakra system, but you kind
of reframe them as psychological development stages, and I had
been under the impression that the ego is the enemy.
You say, it's the prism, So it's the channel through
which our reality is created.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
It's not the problem, but the processor.
Speaker 3 (19:30):
When people say ego, they're speaking about injured ego. You know,
ego that wasn't put together well, and so that creates
and attacks the world around us. What your prism or
ego actually does, you know, we're all into spirituality, but
we are in bodies in a physical world. That's what
we're here to master. What the prism does, or the
(19:53):
ego does, is it takes that energy we share. Because
if you're just one perfect energy, you're not evolving and
you're not creating. You don't need to. We create. Your
ego creates, your eye creates, but you create the way
you were raised those first seven years. And the wonderful
(20:15):
thing about being even ten, but certainly about being an adult,
is then you begin to choose, and you begin to
be in the world. And even if you're not seeing
what you don't see, catalysts come and they push you,
and then you have a choice to either reconstitute in
(20:35):
an old way or say this is what I want
and try something new. So at the prism is the
ideal development for you and for you to now be
the healer for yourself with tiny little changes. You know
what should have happened, you know, at your first ego center,
(20:56):
you should have felt safe and supported. You should have
been able to embrace discipline without it feeling overwhelming. You know,
there are things that needed to happen when you were
a child for you to form a sense of the
world where you could have power in it. And if
those didn't form for whatever reasons. You know, it's not
(21:21):
always that someone did something malicious. You know. Sometimes people
were just like my mother was ill, you know, my manic,
depressive and suicidal. You know, sometimes it's just because you
are born into a very defective environment. One of the
things that I really realized, just because I had the
(21:42):
opportunity for the last ten years to do this system
with thousands of students, and what I realized is even
if they were born in a combat zone, if they
had one adult who provided a solidure as them and
that adult anything around that really didn't matter.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
Yeah. I've heard that before, that you just need one
adult to say I love you and I believe in you,
they know, and.
Speaker 3 (22:12):
To say, ah, this is the way we do it,
and to show you how to go out into the
world in a way that the world cooperates and you
need more than I love you. You know. That was
very much my generation the sixties, where yeah, you know,
love and adore your children no, because you know what,
unless you give them a good structure, the world isn't
(22:32):
going to love and adore your children, and you're guaranteeing
them a miserable experience. So hair takers have really big jobs.
And of course telepathy is a real thing, and there
are so much research on telepathy and on how unfortunately
we are in constant communication with the world around us
(22:52):
and it with us. And one of the things that
is so important is that children pick up what you experience.
You know, good housekeeping is number one.
Speaker 1 (23:02):
Everybody on this podcast is going to laugh because I
say this quote probably every other episode. But my mom
has this phrase that lessons are caught, not taught, in parenthood.
It seems to be so true, I think, and I
try not to use the word I in interviews, but
I'm going to give this as an example just so
we can pick it apart. I think I was operating
from a cracked prism or cracked ego for a while
(23:25):
in my twenties, and I probably still am, but I've
done a lot more noticing. One of the things that
I learned from therapy was that even though I grew
up with a pretty great nuclear family structure, it seemed
like my emotional needs were not always met, and so
that has permeated, I think the rest of my life.
(23:46):
It's something that I actively work on, and before therapy
I was not noticing. How do we know when our
prism is cracked?
Speaker 2 (23:55):
Like I would love for everybody to walk away from
this conversation reckg something What.
Speaker 3 (24:01):
Isn't working in your life? You know, once again, when
you're looking at what happened to you, that's murky subjective.
Are you making enough money? Are you doing something you love?
Are you well partnered if you want to be partnered?
Is your body healthy? Are you acknowledged? Is your life peaceful?
Or are there all these things that you know go
(24:22):
wrong out of left field? I think one of the
failings of therapy, although you know I love therapy too,
but one of the failings of therapy. Even though a
good therapist is a catalyst, so does challenge your old prism.
One of the failings is we're looking back at things
for understanding and actually have experienced teaching that understanding comes
(24:48):
from doing something different in the world and getting a
different result from the world, and that the best thing
to heal is getting exactly what you want. It is amazing. Wow,
these is go away when the person finally falls in
love or finally sells their art and becomes successful, or
(25:08):
you know, we've been taught by an era that it's
important to understand, and actually understanding is overrated. It's important
to do something differently, notice that you get a different result,
and then if that works for you, do it in
(25:28):
all the areas that are important. And one of the
wonderful things about being a human being and being an
animal world because the world has you know, like gravity,
they're rules. They are rules to being. There are rules
to the world. They're not esoteric rules, they're really physical rules.
And one of the great things is if you're able
finally to get your value for your work, that's forth
(25:52):
ego center, it's value. You'll be able to do that
in love, You'll be able to do that for yourself.
You'll be able to do that when choosing a property.
One problem solved at an ego center solves that problem
in all the rest of your life.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
So are because you feel confident.
Speaker 3 (26:11):
No, it's not about feeling, because you repattern what you do.
If you don't know a door opens, you will never
try to open a door. So you create these new
receptors that you didn't have. And even people with wonderful
early childhood ego development struggle because they often want to
(26:36):
achieve more. When you achieve more, you have to adapt
to new circumstances. The difference between having healthy early development
and unhealthy early development is that if you had healthy
early development, chances are you can not that it's not hard,
not that you don't make mistakes, not that sometimes things
(26:57):
fall apart, but that basically what it is you perceive
and want you achieve. Whereas someone who doesn't have healthy
ego development usually has at least one or two sinkholes
in their life. Even if they have survived by focusing
on career or focusing on a relationship, they usually have
(27:17):
some sinkholes. And one of the most wonderful things on
Instagram we do one element of the prism together as
a group, and we do readings for each other and healing.
And one of the wonderful things is that you really
do completely change your external world. You know your internal
world too, But I really almost want to say, you
(27:38):
know what, stop looking at your belly button. What is
it you want in the world. It's okay to want.
Only an ego can create. Spirit doesn't create its energy.
You know, energy can turn on a light bulb. You know.
Energy also, if you wet your finger put it in
(27:59):
a live socket, can electrocute you. It doesn't have any
quality of its own. It's how you channel it. And
so the prison is, how do you want to channel
energy in the world? What do you want to create?
Because you can create it, you don't have to believe
in it. It doesn't have to feel good, it doesn't
have to be good. There's this thing about worthiness. I
(28:19):
feel that I'm worthy of love. Who made a worthiness rule?
I mean, look at all the hideous people who've achieved
amazing things. There's no worthiness rule. If you want it,
there's a system to get it. You are that system,
and that is the person.
Speaker 1 (28:34):
Okay, So I'm now placing a few parts of your
work together because you've consulted for billion dollar companies. You've
helped a lot of executives tap into decision making insights
that logic alone probably can't provide. I've heard it called
strategic forecasting. You've helped people with hiring decisions, product development,
creative direction, even crisis management. Why do you think these
(28:58):
high performers are so interested in intuition?
Speaker 2 (29:01):
Is it that wanting that you're talking about.
Speaker 3 (29:03):
No, I mean, first of all, the companies I work for,
it's not that they want to learn. I predict the
future for them. That's my day job. That's how companies
who hire me to go in and train their people.
They're interested because it's correct data. And the problem with
hiring a consultant who is not an intuitive consultant is
(29:26):
that consultants using the same data everyone else has, whereas
intuition gives you out of the blue information about the
future about other people. For example, you're building a building
in a hot neighborhood. What you don't realize is flooding
is going to become a problem and that neighborhood that
you know half billion dollar project is going to tank.
(29:49):
So you can't do that except with precognition, with being
able to tell the future. So companies hire me to
tell the future, and often my students want that two.
That is sixth the ego center. It's connected to intellect,
it's connected to observation. But your intuition gives you data.
It says this is what's going to happen. So they
(30:11):
hire me to tell them what's ahead so that they
can move the pieces.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
Now, can you help clear something up. I've never understood
about intuitive So talk to me about the amount of
free will that changes the premonition or the future casting.
Speaker 3 (30:29):
That's a really great question, and it is one that
over six and a half decades I have really proven
beyond a shadow of a doubt, we do have choice.
We can change almost everything. I mean, when I was young, genetics,
you were born, Your genetics were what they were. You
were stuck with them. I never experienced that, and luckily
(30:54):
neither did a bunch of scientists who now see that, Oh, actually, epigenetics,
your genes change with your experience and beliefs and efforts,
and you know your environment, and those changes not just you.
They're passed down then to future generations. So we are
all free will. That is what the prism is. That's
(31:14):
what ego is. However, and big. However, mammals are not
made to change, especially not quickly, you know, and change
always brings in new risks. So we have again our beliefs,
all made before we could reason, before we were seven.
(31:34):
You know, our beliefs, our experiences. I learned to walk
on my own, and mommy leaves and brings home another
baby and replaces me that baby unless they have a
really good support in their parenting. That baby then equates
autonomy with abandonment and messes up many areas of their life.
(31:58):
So we have so many patterns. Very little of that
is conscious, which is why it's so helpful to have goals.
You know, people say goals are so not spiritual. Making
a lot of money is in spiritual, having great times
in spiritual, being able to have beautiful houses and spiritual,
Well why isn't it? I mean, matter is spirit. If
you believe that everything's energy, then your ability to create
(32:24):
is not only so spiritual, but so human. You've learned
how to work the machine and often you know, the
billionaires who don't share are ego damaged. But by and large,
if you look around, people who feel that they can
create what they want create for others.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
That's a really beautiful statement. I agree with you.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
I've heard you talk a lot about your brain in
other podcasts from like twenty twenty twenty twenty two, you
mentioned that you have ADHD or add.
Speaker 3 (32:59):
ADHD, and I have really severe you know, recently, not recently,
about eight years ago, I did a new neuropsychoval which
is two days of neurological testing and psychological testing. And
she looked at me and she said, I'm amazed you
can cross the street.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
And I did it because at my age, if I
go in and I don't know what year it is
and I don't know what city it is, they think
dementia and not ADHD. But I was that way at
eleven or at five. So the damaged for lack of
a better word, brain, And you know, I think that
in a way, kind of normalizing all of these different neurologies,
(33:38):
it can be wonderful and it can also not be
helpful because it's just like lefties die more easily because
it's a right handed world. You are challenged when you're
a little bit outside, but especially when you're a lot
outside of the norm. However, the brain that doesn't have
executive function, that doesn't place itself, is wonderful at moving
(33:59):
in time and space. And I would love an educational
system that actually evaluated children for their strengths, encourage their strengths,
but then also looked at their passions. Because intuition is
not my passion. It's my strength.
Speaker 2 (34:17):
What's your passion?
Speaker 3 (34:18):
My passion is writing, okay, and my passion is community.
I love teaching. Every book I write as a textbook.
I write as a book that people will go into the.
Speaker 2 (34:28):
World, and because that makes sense.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
Practitioners and teach My passion is community. My husband says,
I can make a party out of anything, and it's
funny because I'm an incredible introvert. So it would be
wonderful if our educational systems said, okay, here are strengths.
Because the strength was never going to be memorization. You know,
I couldn't for the life of me remember the periodic tables.
(34:50):
But my strength was being able to find something in
a mathematical equation without going through the steps. For example,
the wormhole this reality and this reality, you know, or
between where we are now and the goal. And I
often have my students do a healing where they create
a wormhole where this hand is where they are now, okay,
(35:13):
And where this hand is where they want to go,
And the space between is actually all the healings, all
the things in the world, and all the things in
themselves that need to shift. And then I have them
suspend the illusion of separateness, because separateness is an illusion,
and bring the present and the desired future together, And
(35:33):
I say, don't be rigid about this. You may want
to take your hands, you may want to move, you
may want to put air between do whatever it is
you are led to do, be fully both in the
present and in that desired future, without having to see
it or know it. And then when their hands come together,
the healing is done. And I have them take the
hand of the person who got them there, because we
(35:56):
forget we do a lot for ourselves.
Speaker 1 (35:58):
I took a form of a time class a few
years ago, and you can actually feel the energy, beat,
the heat and the energy between your hands if you
hold them close or with anybody else's.
Speaker 2 (36:08):
So that's powerful, I think.
Speaker 3 (36:09):
And what's really interesting is if you teach a form
of healing, and if you go over someone's body, you'll
see some places you can bring your hands close, and
some of them. The energy is really far away. Yes,
you know how to balance. We are all intuitives, we
are all healers, and we're really all catalysts for one another.
You know. One of the things I really love about
(36:31):
my students, and I saw this during COVID, where people
were amazing. They were paying each other's rents, they were
bringing medicine, you know, first responders, We're bringing things, you know,
finding diapers for baby. I mean, it was just they
were an amazing group, but we are not separate. So
when you suspend that illusion, what happens is you begin
to know ways to work and channel that togetherness. Yeah,
(36:56):
and that's so powerful to be able to do, and
it makes strangers friends.
Speaker 1 (37:03):
So much of your work is about self and self work.
And then I'm now hearing you have this real passion
for togetherness and community. How do they work in tangent
with each other in terms of healing.
Speaker 3 (37:14):
I'm my own worst healer and I'm my own worst
intuitive because I also am my own pattern. I need
other people to challenge me, to reveal things to me,
to be examples for me. And I really love it
when people come together, especially with the intention of everyone
(37:38):
being raised up.
Speaker 1 (37:40):
Well, you wrote that every one of us was a
wee before we became an eye, and so there is
sort of this collective origin. Pardon but you cite it,
and I think it's like the idea of collective origin
is interesting.
Speaker 3 (37:53):
Well, I mean also just structurally and psychologically, when you're born,
you have needs, but you don't have a sense of
self apart from your environment. And psychologists see this from
children's art, that they don't have a sense that mommy
is separate from me, or the toy is separate from me.
(38:14):
And actually, you know, when they're potty training sometimes it's
really scary because they see something separate from them. So
the sense of separateness is a very important thing we
acquire because of course, if you're not separate, you cannot
be in relationship because you're not separate, and you can't
have impact on anything because you're not separate. So that separateness,
(38:39):
that individuation, is such an important part of being able
to create in the world. And we all do create
in the world, but when we create together, we really
mirror the energetic reality that we are one. And now
this is science. It was spirituality and parapsychology when I
(38:59):
was young in the sixties, but now we've measured it.
Now we've quantified it. So we want to be separate
from that oneness, at least for the time that we
are in a body, because we can't create merge, we
can't relate merge, and that separateness is really hard. It's
(39:21):
hard to be an eye and it's hard to be
an eye in a world that we will never completely understand,
which is why taking an action. And the prism is
full of actions. It says, try this tiny thing today,
or here's a thought experiment just for today, tiny little thing,
(39:43):
and notice what changes in your external world, because in
your internal world is too subjective. You don't know.
Speaker 1 (39:52):
There's this one part of the ego center that you
call functional vulnerability.
Speaker 2 (39:56):
Am I getting that correct?
Speaker 3 (39:58):
There is always aulnerability. Every ego center has a vulnerability.
So we are doing the third ego center, which is
your diaphragm. Vulnerability is powerlessness.
Speaker 2 (40:10):
And you said that one's always a little shaky.
Speaker 3 (40:13):
Well, no, the polarity.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
Okay, I think I'm misunderstanding. Yes, you can put your
professor hat on, please teach me.
Speaker 3 (40:20):
I'm going to give you an example of what we're
working on. Every part of you has a vulnerability, just
like every part of you has a strength. Right, So
the vulnerability of your drive is the powerlessness you feel
when you drive and the world doesn't cooperate with you.
(40:41):
The polarity of that is you know, of course we
want to drive forward, but learning when to surrender, not
because it's a spiritual thing to do, but because you
can push that wall as much as you want, it's
not going to move. You've got to find another way.
So the functional vulnerability is where, because of what it is,
(41:04):
it's challenged in a certain way. Our feeling of value
and our value in the world is constantly challenged by
our sense of worth, and so in a way, our
vulnerability is something that we have to accept. You know,
there's people who always have to feel powerful and in control.
We all know those, right, those bombastic walkover people. You
(41:29):
don't want to be next to them at a dinner
party or you know, in front of them in line
at a Starbucks, and they're not functional. You want to
be able to say, Okay, this is the vulnerability here.
When I accept that, I'm able to work through the strength.
Speaker 2 (41:48):
So what do you think the cost of not recognizing
this is like, what is the cost of not doing
the work?
Speaker 3 (41:56):
It depends how damaged your life is. And you know that.
By your life, I mean if you're well partnered, if
you are successful, if you're doing something you love, if
you've built the community and family you want, if you
love where you live, if you're healthy, then no cost
until something challenges you. Still, if you've been structured well
(42:18):
in your early life, there's probably no cost. But if
there are things in your life, especially things that chronically
don't work out, like your relationship, you know, you don't
quite ever have that or I work a lot with actors.
Those actors who stay on the plateau, they don't fall off,
but they never really get you know, and they're not
(42:40):
happy there. Some people are happy there, you know, but
they're not happy there. If you are not creating, if
you're not able to create what it is you want
to create, that's the cost of not working on your prism.
And we are taught to manage our intellect over a
lifetime to our emotions over a lifetime. In a way,
(43:02):
therapy just does more of what you were taught by
your parents in a nursery school. We're not taught to
manage our intuition. We're not taught to manage the fact
that if you are arguing with your boss in your head,
why wonder why they're defensive or why they're not attracted
(43:22):
to you, or you're creating that. And when you're aware
of the non local, when you're aware of the intuitive,
when you are aware that you're afraid of a future
that you can change right now, when you're aware that
you can use intuition to really experience another person's prism
what they want. You know, we all think everybody wants
(43:45):
what we want, and actually everyone doesn't want what we want.
Everyone is incredibly unique, Like, not everybody wants companionship. For me,
that's unbelievable that everyone doesn't want companionship, you know, if
they're alone, Wow, But actually everyone doesn't. Some people just
want closet space and freedom and not being tied down
(44:05):
or responsible.
Speaker 1 (44:06):
Or account I have the opposite question, which is what
do you want people to know about the version of
themselves on the other side of some of this prison work.
Speaker 3 (44:15):
First of all, what you fantasize that you want to be,
you really can be. It's never the way you fantasize
it because you're fantasizing from the past. You're fantasizing from
an old paradigm, but the experience of what you want
is available to you. And it's part of what I
don't like about visualization. Again, you visualize what you want,
(44:37):
which maybe once you were given. It's funny my husband
said to me a couple of years ago, he said,
you really love like cooking and serving everybody, And I'm like, no,
I don't. Actually I do it because I want the
people around me to feel safe and comfortable and nourished,
(44:58):
but I don't enjoy doing it. And it completely changed
the prism of our relationship because now I do mourning
because I'm a morning person and he does night and
so now I have a relationship that actually allows me
to do a lot for myself that I wouldn't ever
really have permitted myself. I did have a goal, and
(45:21):
the goal was to get this book done. I mean,
most of my other books I had to write very quickly.
I had fifteen years to test this out on thousands
of people and to really enjoy it. And then I
found the perfect publisher to publish it. This is costly
for a publisher. They did a beautiful job.
Speaker 1 (45:41):
You also had one of the best book publicists I've
ever worked with.
Speaker 3 (45:45):
Oh I love Sarah Hall.
Speaker 2 (45:47):
It was air Donna, Yes, yr Denya.
Speaker 3 (45:50):
But she works with Sarah Hall. Amazing publicists. They are lovely,
really lovely good people. And I have to say that
Sarah had you know, even when I'm not writing, I
still want a community. So Sarah has really been with
me through all of the iterations of my career. You know,
(46:10):
I've been closing, and I've been kind of, you know,
under the radar, and then the hottest thing again. You know,
we all have our pond slime and then we're stars.
And it's wonderful that it goes up and down, because
if it were always up, it would be very exhausting.
Speaker 1 (46:25):
Do you ever work with intuitives when you feel like
you can't figure something out.
Speaker 3 (46:30):
All the time? You do? I train intuitives, So I
do something called boot camp, and I don't take clients.
I work with four companies and that's it. The rest
of the time. I read my students in workshops or
I read them on my lives, on my Instagram lives.
But one of the wonderful things about training intuitives is
(46:52):
that I get amazing readings. I mean, I just had
an intuitive that I trained this morning. That's something I'm
trying to figure out. We're working on the third Eco Center,
which is about manifestation. I manifested something I wanted for years,
but now I have to decide if I really wanted
or not, which I didn't really investigate as much as
maybe I should. And so even though now she's a professional,
(47:17):
my students are dear and they will read cool and
I send them clients because people reach out to me
and I say, what do you need a reading on,
and then I find them the right student. Of course,
I don't charge my students for sending them work, so
of course I use intuitives. Oh my goodness. And my husband,
who's a screen and TV writer, he used to be
(47:38):
as intuitive as a rock. He just refused he was
an intellectual. And I finally said to him, you know,
when I ask you whether I should do this, I
don't want your intellectual answer based on experience which may
not be relevant. I don't want your emotional answer. I
don't want your judgment. I want your attention to go
(47:58):
to the future when I've done this, and I want
you to be able to accurately tell me what the
result is so that I can revise now, and I said,
otherwise I feel alone. It was beautifully manipulative of me,
because my husband does not want me to feel alone.
And now he is one of my best intuitives. And
it's deep into his work also because now when he writes,
(48:21):
a character really becomes them, because that is an intuitive gift,
the ability to become something else and speak from it
with its voice.
Speaker 1 (48:31):
So part of the goal setting that I've noticed is
really asking yourself questions. And I love questions. I'm a
journalist by trade, so I love them to begin with.
I really believe that questions are like a fundamental, very
easy thing that we can all tap into to help
amplify our lives.
Speaker 3 (48:50):
Absolutely, because there are no answers. An answer is good
in such a narrow space. But when you're asking the
right questions, you keep adjust this moment. And that's really
what makes a successful life is the ability to adjust
every moment, even your im statements. They shouldn't be able
(49:10):
to be manipulated or crushed by your world, but they
should be semi permeable. They should be able to take
in new information so that you can become what you
didn't even know because you didn't experience it ever before.
You can become what you want to become, to find
the world that you want to find.
Speaker 1 (49:30):
Absolutely right, And I do feel like questions are at
the crux of that. You've been doing this for over
forty years. I'm wondering if you have a question about
intuition that you ponder often, or something you don't have
an exact answer for.
Speaker 3 (49:46):
I mean, I have so many. I mean I live
in a world of questions. I think that you know
life and death for me just because so many people
in my family have suicided. So life and death for
me have always been kind of an interesting boundary to
sit on. I know that I get very accurate information
(50:10):
and actually can describe people who have died the energy
that was left here, is it actually the dead person?
Like I went to a high school that's all math
and science. Now I'm very much more math and science
than a language person. So I am the original skeptic.
But I don't want the answer to that question. I
(50:32):
don't want the answer to the question of exactly I
have a sense of what happens after we perceive that
we die, But there are things I actually don't want
to know, because I want to be committed to the
human experience. And I think that one thing intuition does
that isn't good is it allows you to really experience
(50:54):
the oneness, and it allows you to make all the
right moves and create all the right things for yourself
without experiencing anything. And that's not being alive. And I
really am. I'm committed to the experience of being alive,
even though sometimes it's very painful and sometimes I don't
(51:15):
feel quite up to the task. I do my own work.
I was saying before that a lot of my books.
I've written two books came as life saving downloads. One
was The Circle, and this I realized was downloaded to
me when I was really a little child, and it
just took maturity and the ability to teach it to
(51:36):
people so I could see that it had an effect
outside of myself. This really helped me create a life
that I mean, I wake up I am pretty much
the sole survivor, and I wake up and I think wow.
And I don't always feel blessed. Sometimes I feel anxious.
I mean, I still my childhood waking up with small children.
(51:57):
I didn't know how to take care of, and a
mother who I didn't know if i'd find dead or
half dead. But I think how broken, cracked and bent
my prism started as both neurologically, genetically and in terms
of experience, how fortunate I am, how okay it is
that I'm imperfect because I've created such a wonderful life.
(52:20):
And I think that all of us have to remind ourselves.
You know, what standard are we holding ourselves too? In
my family, just being alive as a high standard. You
know you have not taken your own life that is
already a high standard. I see people reach out to
me by email or on Instagram or through my website
when they're in real pain.
Speaker 2 (52:40):
Yeah they're seeking, But you know, we don't seek.
Speaker 3 (52:43):
When we're okay, and we shouldn't seek when we're okay.
We should be in the okay, we should joy, we
should be in the moment. But people feel they've ruined
their lives so many times, and I want to tell them, honey,
I have ruined my life more times than I can
tell you. But when you do the prison work, when
you do go work, when you just put one foot
(53:06):
in front of the other, you will get somewhere that
you want to go. Pain really hurts, you know, the
way people judge their pain. Oh, I shouldn't feel so badly.
At least I have food on the table. Yeah, you're
still allowed to feel badly and feel sorry for somelf.
Oh I shouldn't feel so badly. You know this, But
I have so much wealth, and you are allowed. If
(53:28):
you didn't want, you wouldn't create. And I think that
that misplaced self judgment. It's good to be judged. When
you do something wrong, you should rectify it. I think
it is good to be an integral person, but we
judge ourselves so harshly, both for what we achieve and
also for what we want. You know, why shouldn't someone
(53:50):
want a great car? If they want a great car,
that's a symbol. We live in a world of symbols.
You know, you're working hard at something. Why should shouldn't
you want to really be the entirety of everything you
can be? That is a very healthy thing. You know,
Martyrs are not healthy people. That's a psychiatric disorder.
Speaker 1 (54:12):
I actually think that's the big takeaway from our conversation today.
Speaker 2 (54:16):
I had a lot of takeaways from the book.
Speaker 1 (54:17):
But today I'm really hearing you say, go forth in
all of your wants, but.
Speaker 3 (54:23):
Pick three because one of the problems we have is
we hop around. Then we have a lot of unfinished projects.
Speaker 2 (54:32):
Okay, and so what are your three wants right now?
Speaker 3 (54:35):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (54:36):
Are you able to share?
Speaker 3 (54:38):
All of my three wants go under one umbrella, and
that umbrella is my family. But within that, you know
the joy I get from teachings. I want a community
to teach and to learn from that has ease to it.
You know, this is the first book I've published in
fourteen years, so I'm teaching a very specific thing in
(55:00):
the past, which is intuitive development. I want to teach this.
The other ones they all fit under that umbrella. But
they are a little private.
Speaker 1 (55:09):
That's totally okay. I actually kind of like that. I
think they are private. Maybe they should stay that way
for everybody, you know.
Speaker 3 (55:15):
Sometimes, you know, I definitely ask my community please support me.
This is important to me. Please support me in this
because it is wonderful to give voice to things, because
then you can cultivate support. It's easy for me to
talk about really wanting to be happy. And I have
been successful in the world, but successful to me means
(55:39):
I can do a prison group anywhere in the world
any time I want, with a week's notice, you know,
and have a group of amazing, capable people changing their lives,
whereas some of the more heart centered goals are a
little more difficult to express on a show.
Speaker 2 (55:58):
My last question for you, Laura.
Speaker 1 (56:01):
I saw Trevor Noah ask Oprah this and I thought
it was a really interesting question. He said, You've interviewed
so many of the most quote unquote successful people in
the world. Is there anything that you see they have
in common? You've done the same, You've worked with so
many successful people.
Speaker 2 (56:16):
Do you see a through line?
Speaker 3 (56:18):
I mean, actually, the through line is that they're intuitive
and that they apply their intuition. Not intuitive in terms
of I believe this is going to happen, But they
do have goals and their attention takes them to how
to create them. So they are intuitive, sometimes without knowing
they're intuitive. They work intuitively because logic is flawed because
(56:43):
it's only as good as the data it has, whereas
intuition gives you exactly the data you need. And so
every ego center in the prism does have an intuitive
work that I want people to do because what it
allows you to do is to put your life on autumn,
a pilot in a way so that you can be
present in the moment. But the future comes in when
(57:06):
you need that information to pivot, or the past comes
in when you need to reframe something to be able
to grow into who you want to be in that moment.
It's almost harder intuitively to read someone's past than their future.
That their future is clean. Their past they have judgment
and projections about, but we can change those and it
(57:26):
changes us.
Speaker 2 (57:28):
Thank you so much. I really appreciate your time.
Speaker 3 (57:31):
Thank you, this is really lovely.
Speaker 1 (57:38):
Okay, you know what time it is. Today's a good day,
to have a good day. I'll see you next week.
No one has all the answers, but when we ask
the right questions, we get a little closer, closer to truths,
closer to each other, even closer to ourselves. I'm journalist
Danielle Robe, and each week, my guests and I come
together to challenge the status quo and our own.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Ways of thinking by daring to ask what if, why not?
And who says?
Speaker 3 (00:30):
So?
Speaker 1 (00:30):
Come curious, dig deep, and join the conversation. It's time
to question everything. Hell, I hope you're having a beautiful,
beautiful week. Today's all about intuition, and we really talk
about intuition a lot, but what is it actually right? So,
(00:52):
psychology today defines it as a form of knowledge that
appears in consciousness without obvious deliberation. So it's not mat
but a faculty in which hunches are generated by the
unconscious mind rapidly sifting through past experiences and cumulative knowledge.
In other words, it's your gut powered by everything you've
(01:13):
ever seen, heard, and lived. But here's the hiccup with that, right,
what if you're cumulative knowledge, the thing that's supposed to
fuel your intuition is actually blocking it. Let's say you
grew up in a tough neighborhood, and people weren't truthful
and were always kind of shady. Now you assume everyone's lying,
(01:34):
or maybe your mom cheated on your dad growing up,
so your gut tells you that your boyfriend probably is
going to cheat on you too. That's not intuition. That's
unprocessed patterning disguised as a hunch. So enter this week's guest,
Laura Day. She's a New York Times bestselling author, a
(01:56):
world renowned intuitive and the Advisor CEO, and celebrities like
Demi Moor and Brad Pitt call on when they need answers.
She's consulted for billion dollar companies, train the military in
remote viewing, and helped people all over the world tap
into their intuition in practical, measurable ways, and her latest book,
(02:16):
The Prism, might be her most personal work yet. She
says intuition is not mystical, it's measurable. She says you
don't need to believe in it to even use it.
And everything you're searching for clarity in your career, your relationships,
even your health, she says, it's already inside of you.
We just haven't been taught how to access it. But
(02:38):
here's the key.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
In order to access it from a clear and grounded place,
we have to understand our prism, the system that we
use to process reality.
Speaker 3 (02:48):
You're your magic wand you think, you do, you connect,
you create, you choose. There is nothing more magic than you.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Laura bill don Freud's idea that our ego begins developing
an early childhood, within the first three to seven years
of life, and then evolves from there. And what she
proposes is that our ego is actually not the enemy.
Speaker 2 (03:12):
Like so much of pop psychology says, what.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
Your prism or ego actually does is it takes. If
you know, we're all into spirituality, but we are in
bodies in a physical world. That's what we're here to master.
So then what the prism does or the ego does,
is it takes that energy we share. Because if you're
just one perfect energy, you're not evolving.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
And while all of this may sound woo woo, Laura
is anything, but her method is grounded in structure and
real world data. She's not really here to talk vibes.
I thought she would be, but she's more interested in
talking about results.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
Part of the problem is everyone's always looking for a
sign you don't need a sign if you decide, if
you are determined.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
So in this conversation, Laura breaks down how to rewire
our responses, shift our patterns, and use intuition as a tool,
not a feeling, to change our lives.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
What do you want to create? Because you can create it,
you don't have to believe in it. It doesn't have
to feel good, it doesn't have to be good. There's
this thing about worthiness. I feel that I'm worthy of love.
Who made a worthiness rule? I mean, look at all
the hideous people who've achieved amazing things. There's no worthiness rule.
If you want it, there's a system to get it.
(04:32):
You are that system, and that is the Prism.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
So today we're circling one big question. What does it
really take to change your life? And how do you
access the intuition that's already inside of you to do it?
It's time to question everything with Laura Day. Laura, I've
been following your work for some time. I'm really excited
to speak with you. Thank you for taking the time.
Speaker 3 (04:55):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Okay, So the Prism, so much of about your work
and this book is about intuition, and you write you
may not know it, but you have the inate ability
to get the information you need about anyone and anything
at any point in time. The idea that we have
everything we need, that we know everything already is something
(05:17):
I don't think. I hear a lot of people talk about.
There's a lot of outsourcing in the self help world nowadays.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
What does that knowing feel like? What should we be
looking out for?
Speaker 3 (05:28):
I think we trap ourselves in a lot of useless paradigms,
and so we think we're making changes, but we're not really.
What is so important and the prism starts with this,
as does any productive intuitive work. What are your goals?
You know, if you were both bow and arrow, what's
your goal's eye? So when people start a process, it's
(05:53):
so important to know where you're going, and then to
not get frustrated with yourself because the reality is you
can't change from within. You know, we're taught to naval gaze,
and you really you can't change from within. You need
a catalyst. Your patterns hold you together, but they also
hold you in place, and so there are many ways
to find a catalyst. Intuition is really the only way
(06:18):
that you can do alone.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
Is it true that women are able to tap into
their intuition more naturally.
Speaker 3 (06:25):
No, actually that is a huge fallacy because intuition is
a detached state. Intuition is the ability to get data.
And the way that the traditionally female brain works is
that there's a lot of communication between the two hemispheres.
There's actually structurally more connection, and so the detachment that
(06:50):
is needed to document information kind of without bias, is
less effective in the traditionally female brain. There are other
things that, of course that brain is more effective for,
certainly more effective for certain intuitive skills like telepathy and mediumship,
which is the ability to literally become something else. But ladies,
(07:13):
that also has a downside, you know, which I think
is so important to get into and in the prism
I get into it because it has someone else driving
your vehicle.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
Well, I think you're hitting on the cornerstone of your
entire body of work, which is integrating light and dark.
Do you feel like that you had a very tumultuous upbringing.
Speaker 3 (07:34):
I've had two siblings suicide, my mother suicided, my uncle suicided.
Other than having definitely different neurology, we had very abusive childhoods.
And I think that in a sense that either creates
people who survive or who don't survive. But one of
the things that intuition does, and that really is in
(07:55):
many ways the luck of having a certain kind of
brain is it allows the guidance, so to speak. And
I don't mean guidance like spirit guide. I mean you
need to know something above your pay grade. When I
was five, I was alone in an apartment every night
with three younger children and no adult. So you need
to know how to heat a bottle, but you don't
(08:16):
really know how to heat a bottle. And what all
human beings are capable of is intuitively, so leaving the ego,
leaving self, and especially when you're below seven and you
don't really have a self structured yet and just grabbing
into that common energy that we call, you know, spirit,
(08:38):
which science just calls energy. I don't recommend trauma as
an intuitive development tool because many like my siblings, don't
survive it, but it certainly I think points to the fact.
And it's one of my favorite phrases, which is your
pathology can be your potential. You know, you have to
work with what you have, and we're especially younger people.
(09:02):
With the Internet and with social media, you think people
have all of these things that you need, and actually
you are a perfect version of you. And when you
learn to market that, so to speak, whether it's in
love or in business, or to have a skill that
(09:23):
rewards you economically, when you are your you and you
market that well using intuition to the world, you create
a life that is great for you.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
I like that you say that intuition is a skill
that has been my experience. I'm wondering what you're able
to share for all of us that are still working
on it. What is the first step if you're not
in touch with it.
Speaker 3 (09:51):
If you're not in touch with it, what's happening is
your subconscious is using it. Oh, you're still trying to
prove you the smartest person in third grade. You're getting
yourself in trouble, or you're trying to save mommy and
daddy and you're bringing people in who are inappropriate. If
you are not conscious of your intuition, then under your
conscious awareness, it has a dialogue with the world around
(10:14):
you that really just keeps recreating difficulties. You know, it
keeps you really stuck. So the first way to use
intuition consciously is very unmagical. It's what is it you
want to create? And you know when you have a goal,
all you are persistent with that goal. I mean, part
of the problem is we think this, we need this,
(10:36):
we want this, we need to address this. And so
what I ask you to do and in the prison,
really what you do first is you set those three goals.
Because when you have a goal, you have a filing system.
But you also are looking in the right direction. Now,
of course we find what we are looking for. So
(10:57):
it's really important. And the reason that the book is
called the Prism is we are a structure and we're
in a material world with structures. Even relationships have a structure,
all dynamics have a structure, and it is really important
to begin to engage in interfacing with that structure differently.
(11:22):
And it's a tiny change, you know, big changes really
kind of just make messes because we're so complex and
we're connected to everything. So you make a tiny change.
I mean, I don't know if your refrigerator has ever
gone down two degrees, but there's some things that just don't.
Speaker 2 (11:39):
Survive, it's true.
Speaker 3 (11:41):
And so it's really important to have your goals. You
don't have to believe in them. I mean belief is
the big mind f You don't have to believe in everything.
It doesn't have to feel good.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
That's interesting, Oh.
Speaker 3 (11:56):
I think that is such a bad marker. How something
feels I mean, hero feels good. I'm going through your
old patterns, even if when they're painful, often feels really good.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
Okay, But here's my question, because I hear a lot
of people that our great manifestors talk about how you
don't really attract what you want. You attract who you
are and the vibration you're giving out. If you say
that my goal is to be one of the biggest
podcasters in the country.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
But I'm not living there, I'm not feeling it.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
If I don't believe it yet, how am I going
to be able to achieve it?
Speaker 2 (12:34):
What's the disconnect?
Speaker 3 (12:35):
Nothing to do with achievement, you know. One of the
reasons that I write self help is that you again
can't think outside the box. You are the box. But
when you try what someone else who has done something
successful is on, often you find a key that works
for you. Not all of those keys, because we're a
(12:57):
unique but you find a key that works for you.
So if you want to be the most successful podcaster.
I would both listen to successful podcasters and ones that
have really messed up. I would try on things that
are uncomfortable but not dangerous or no new damage damaged
is just wasted time, wasted energy. We all planted how
(13:21):
at our prism, at our structure, but the wonderful thing
is we are always growing. One of the things that
I see so much of my workshops is initially people
are doing that somebody nobody thing at a person so
on that's no one. The reality is we are all one,
and it may be the person who is literally the
(13:45):
last person you consider who has your answer. The important
thing to realize is your answer, and it's really big
now to look at your trauma. Find your trauma, believe me,
go for something that you want that's bigger than any
you've ever achieved. Your trauma is the first person to
the party canavoid it. So I don't believe in positive thinking,
(14:07):
because if a bullet's coming out you, it will definitely
hit you notice it. You need to know the action,
and then you need to take the action. You need
to do those three things. And I know threes are
mystical numbers. People like to mystify. Everything is demagicalize. You're
your magic wand you think, you do, you connect, you create,
(14:30):
you choose. There is nothing more magic than you. And
I think that we really underestimate how much courage it
takes to be alive, to be a human being, to
invest in relationships. I mean, I know, I wake up
every morning because of all the deaths so early in
my life, and I just make sure my husband's breathing,
(14:51):
and if his breathing, that is a good day.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
I love that you mentioned noticing an action. Any positive
stride I have made has been from noticing.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
That is the first step in therapy.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
And also not avoiding your obstacles. I mean, you don't
see what you don't see, and you will. I walk
into walls and I've written seven very successful self help books,
but I still walk into new walls because I'm going
and every time I grow, they are new things I
can't do. There were medial tasks. They are new obstacles
that I didn't know. Oh wow, I thought I solved
(15:25):
that forty years ago, and yeah, here it is just
dressed up differently. And the fact of the matter is
if you engage in empowered realistic thinking and if you
try things on from outside of yourself that are uncomfortable. Again,
that's why I write self help, and that's why intuition
is so important. You will make those changes. You will
(15:49):
get there. Part of the problem is everyone's always looking
for a sign. You don't need a sign if you
decide if you're determined, and then if you're flexible, and
the person takes a lot about the ego, you know
determination isn't going to do it. You're still in the box. Yeah,
be determined, you need to be flexible, and you need
to be resilient because if you're doing something great, you
(16:12):
will get knocked on your bottom.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
I want to dive deeper into the prism because I
think we keep mentioning it. It's the system that you've
come up with that you're sharing in the book. It's
also the name of the book. But how do you
describe what the prism is?
Speaker 3 (16:25):
The prism is your ego. The ego gets a bad name,
but you do have genetics that form you and how
you respond to the world. And how you respond to
the world is both the world you perceive, so you
may not see the whole world here and miss all that,
but it's also how you interact so you're born with
(16:45):
a certain structure, but then the ego, so the I want,
I believe, I am, I see, I interact. Anything with
an eye is formed between conception and age seven, and
then you're locked and loaded and the rest is vision.
And one of the things that I realized when I
was really downloading this, you know, some of my books
(17:07):
I write there based on my experience. All the intuition
books were based on the scientific testing on me as
an intuitive.
Speaker 2 (17:16):
What is scientific testing on you? What does that mean?
Speaker 3 (17:19):
So back in the early eighties, there was a lot
of interest in the extended capacities of the human mind,
mostly for remote viewing for military purposes, although that's not
what we knew, and there were many of us. I'm
not unique, and so my first books were based on
those tests, you know, making the tests into training. That's
how I was trained, not through the esoteric community, but
(17:42):
through the scientific community. And it was great training because
you're either right or you're wrong. There's none of this
kind of murky stuff.
Speaker 2 (17:49):
You're really into metrics and verifiable results.
Speaker 3 (17:52):
You know, the subconscious belief doesn't work. I mean, it
works for a while until you get something that disproves it.
But your subconscious is looking for will this help me survive?
And if it will use it, and if it won't,
it goes back to its old patterns. So it's really
both important for you to have access to yourself and
(18:14):
your abilities to prove it to yourself in the real world.
But it's also important because belief is risky business. You know,
people believe they can fly and you can die that way.
You really need to have again a prism, a structure
where you can reality test and use things that work
(18:36):
time and time again, which doesn't mean everything will be perfect.
You know, how I know I've achieved something is I'm
worried about something new.
Speaker 1 (18:44):
Yes, that's a great point, and I have to tell
you it's very rare. I think for anybody nowadays that
somebody's mind is really changed by a book and idea
a person. You completely changed my mind with this book
because I had always that ego is the enemy, that
your ego is what's getting in the way of prosperity,
(19:07):
of love, of all the goodness in your life and
your light right, and you outline these seven ego centers,
which are based on the chakra system, but you kind
of reframe them as psychological development stages, and I had
been under the impression that the ego is the enemy.
You say, it's the prism, So it's the channel through
which our reality is created.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
It's not the problem, but the processor.
Speaker 3 (19:30):
When people say ego, they're speaking about injured ego. You know,
ego that wasn't put together well, and so that creates
and attacks the world around us. What your prism or
ego actually does, you know, we're all into spirituality, but
we are in bodies in a physical world. That's what
we're here to master. What the prism does, or the
(19:53):
ego does, is it takes that energy we share. Because
if you're just one perfect energy, you're not evolving and
you're not creating. You don't need to. We create. Your
ego creates, your eye creates, but you create the way
you were raised those first seven years. And the wonderful
(20:15):
thing about being even ten, but certainly about being an adult,
is then you begin to choose, and you begin to
be in the world. And even if you're not seeing
what you don't see, catalysts come and they push you,
and then you have a choice to either reconstitute in
(20:35):
an old way or say this is what I want
and try something new. So at the prism is the
ideal development for you and for you to now be
the healer for yourself with tiny little changes. You know
what should have happened, you know, at your first ego center,
(20:56):
you should have felt safe and supported. You should have
been able to embrace discipline without it feeling overwhelming. You know,
there are things that needed to happen when you were
a child for you to form a sense of the
world where you could have power in it. And if
those didn't form for whatever reasons. You know, it's not
(21:21):
always that someone did something malicious. You know. Sometimes people
were just like my mother was ill, you know, my manic,
depressive and suicidal. You know, sometimes it's just because you
are born into a very defective environment. One of the
things that I really realized, just because I had the
(21:42):
opportunity for the last ten years to do this system
with thousands of students, and what I realized is even
if they were born in a combat zone, if they
had one adult who provided a solidure as them and
that adult anything around that really didn't matter.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
Yeah. I've heard that before, that you just need one
adult to say I love you and I believe in you,
they know, and.
Speaker 3 (22:12):
To say, ah, this is the way we do it,
and to show you how to go out into the
world in a way that the world cooperates and you
need more than I love you. You know. That was
very much my generation the sixties, where yeah, you know,
love and adore your children no, because you know what,
unless you give them a good structure, the world isn't
(22:32):
going to love and adore your children, and you're guaranteeing
them a miserable experience. So hair takers have really big jobs.
And of course telepathy is a real thing, and there
are so much research on telepathy and on how unfortunately
we are in constant communication with the world around us
(22:52):
and it with us. And one of the things that
is so important is that children pick up what you experience.
You know, good housekeeping is number one.
Speaker 1 (23:02):
Everybody on this podcast is going to laugh because I
say this quote probably every other episode. But my mom
has this phrase that lessons are caught, not taught, in parenthood.
It seems to be so true, I think, and I
try not to use the word I in interviews, but
I'm going to give this as an example just so
we can pick it apart. I think I was operating
from a cracked prism or cracked ego for a while
(23:25):
in my twenties, and I probably still am, but I've
done a lot more noticing. One of the things that
I learned from therapy was that even though I grew
up with a pretty great nuclear family structure, it seemed
like my emotional needs were not always met, and so
that has permeated, I think the rest of my life.
(23:46):
It's something that I actively work on, and before therapy
I was not noticing. How do we know when our
prism is cracked?
Speaker 2 (23:55):
Like I would love for everybody to walk away from
this conversation reckg something What.
Speaker 3 (24:01):
Isn't working in your life? You know, once again, when
you're looking at what happened to you, that's murky subjective.
Are you making enough money? Are you doing something you love?
Are you well partnered if you want to be partnered?
Is your body healthy? Are you acknowledged? Is your life peaceful?
Or are there all these things that you know go
(24:22):
wrong out of left field? I think one of the
failings of therapy, although you know I love therapy too,
but one of the failings of therapy. Even though a
good therapist is a catalyst, so does challenge your old prism.
One of the failings is we're looking back at things
for understanding and actually have experienced teaching that understanding comes
(24:48):
from doing something different in the world and getting a
different result from the world, and that the best thing
to heal is getting exactly what you want. It is amazing. Wow,
these is go away when the person finally falls in
love or finally sells their art and becomes successful, or
(25:08):
you know, we've been taught by an era that it's
important to understand, and actually understanding is overrated. It's important
to do something differently, notice that you get a different result,
and then if that works for you, do it in
(25:28):
all the areas that are important. And one of the
wonderful things about being a human being and being an
animal world because the world has you know, like gravity,
they're rules. They are rules to being. There are rules
to the world. They're not esoteric rules, they're really physical rules.
And one of the great things is if you're able
finally to get your value for your work, that's forth
(25:52):
ego center, it's value. You'll be able to do that
in love, You'll be able to do that for yourself.
You'll be able to do that when choosing a property.
One problem solved at an ego center solves that problem
in all the rest of your life.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
So are because you feel confident.
Speaker 3 (26:11):
No, it's not about feeling, because you repattern what you do.
If you don't know a door opens, you will never
try to open a door. So you create these new
receptors that you didn't have. And even people with wonderful
early childhood ego development struggle because they often want to
(26:36):
achieve more. When you achieve more, you have to adapt
to new circumstances. The difference between having healthy early development
and unhealthy early development is that if you had healthy
early development, chances are you can not that it's not hard,
not that you don't make mistakes, not that sometimes things
(26:57):
fall apart, but that basically what it is you perceive
and want you achieve. Whereas someone who doesn't have healthy
ego development usually has at least one or two sinkholes
in their life. Even if they have survived by focusing
on career or focusing on a relationship, they usually have
(27:17):
some sinkholes. And one of the most wonderful things on
Instagram we do one element of the prism together as
a group, and we do readings for each other and healing.
And one of the wonderful things is that you really
do completely change your external world. You know your internal
world too, But I really almost want to say, you
(27:38):
know what, stop looking at your belly button. What is
it you want in the world. It's okay to want.
Only an ego can create. Spirit doesn't create its energy.
You know, energy can turn on a light bulb. You know.
Energy also, if you wet your finger put it in
(27:59):
a live socket, can electrocute you. It doesn't have any
quality of its own. It's how you channel it. And
so the prison is, how do you want to channel
energy in the world? What do you want to create?
Because you can create it, you don't have to believe
in it. It doesn't have to feel good, it doesn't
have to be good. There's this thing about worthiness. I
(28:19):
feel that I'm worthy of love. Who made a worthiness rule?
I mean, look at all the hideous people who've achieved
amazing things. There's no worthiness rule. If you want it,
there's a system to get it. You are that system,
and that is the person.
Speaker 1 (28:34):
Okay, So I'm now placing a few parts of your
work together because you've consulted for billion dollar companies. You've
helped a lot of executives tap into decision making insights
that logic alone probably can't provide. I've heard it called
strategic forecasting. You've helped people with hiring decisions, product development,
creative direction, even crisis management. Why do you think these
(28:58):
high performers are so interested in intuition?
Speaker 2 (29:01):
Is it that wanting that you're talking about.
Speaker 3 (29:03):
No, I mean, first of all, the companies I work for,
it's not that they want to learn. I predict the
future for them. That's my day job. That's how companies
who hire me to go in and train their people.
They're interested because it's correct data. And the problem with
hiring a consultant who is not an intuitive consultant is
(29:26):
that consultants using the same data everyone else has, whereas
intuition gives you out of the blue information about the
future about other people. For example, you're building a building
in a hot neighborhood. What you don't realize is flooding
is going to become a problem and that neighborhood that
you know half billion dollar project is going to tank.
(29:49):
So you can't do that except with precognition, with being
able to tell the future. So companies hire me to
tell the future, and often my students want that two.
That is sixth the ego center. It's connected to intellect,
it's connected to observation. But your intuition gives you data.
It says this is what's going to happen. So they
(30:11):
hire me to tell them what's ahead so that they
can move the pieces.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
Now, can you help clear something up. I've never understood
about intuitive So talk to me about the amount of
free will that changes the premonition or the future casting.
Speaker 3 (30:29):
That's a really great question, and it is one that
over six and a half decades I have really proven
beyond a shadow of a doubt, we do have choice.
We can change almost everything. I mean, when I was young, genetics,
you were born, Your genetics were what they were. You
were stuck with them. I never experienced that, and luckily
(30:54):
neither did a bunch of scientists who now see that, Oh, actually, epigenetics,
your genes change with your experience and beliefs and efforts,
and you know your environment, and those changes not just you.
They're passed down then to future generations. So we are
all free will. That is what the prism is. That's
(31:14):
what ego is. However, and big. However, mammals are not
made to change, especially not quickly, you know, and change
always brings in new risks. So we have again our beliefs,
all made before we could reason, before we were seven.
(31:34):
You know, our beliefs, our experiences. I learned to walk
on my own, and mommy leaves and brings home another
baby and replaces me that baby unless they have a
really good support in their parenting. That baby then equates
autonomy with abandonment and messes up many areas of their life.
(31:58):
So we have so many patterns. Very little of that
is conscious, which is why it's so helpful to have goals.
You know, people say goals are so not spiritual. Making
a lot of money is in spiritual, having great times
in spiritual, being able to have beautiful houses and spiritual,
Well why isn't it? I mean, matter is spirit. If
you believe that everything's energy, then your ability to create
(32:24):
is not only so spiritual, but so human. You've learned
how to work the machine and often you know, the
billionaires who don't share are ego damaged. But by and large,
if you look around, people who feel that they can
create what they want create for others.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
That's a really beautiful statement. I agree with you.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
I've heard you talk a lot about your brain in
other podcasts from like twenty twenty twenty twenty two, you
mentioned that you have ADHD or add.
Speaker 3 (32:59):
ADHD, and I have really severe you know, recently, not recently,
about eight years ago, I did a new neuropsychoval which
is two days of neurological testing and psychological testing. And
she looked at me and she said, I'm amazed you
can cross the street.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
And I did it because at my age, if I
go in and I don't know what year it is
and I don't know what city it is, they think
dementia and not ADHD. But I was that way at
eleven or at five. So the damaged for lack of
a better word, brain, And you know, I think that
in a way, kind of normalizing all of these different neurologies,
(33:38):
it can be wonderful and it can also not be
helpful because it's just like lefties die more easily because
it's a right handed world. You are challenged when you're
a little bit outside, but especially when you're a lot
outside of the norm. However, the brain that doesn't have
executive function, that doesn't place itself, is wonderful at moving
(33:59):
in time and space. And I would love an educational
system that actually evaluated children for their strengths, encourage their strengths,
but then also looked at their passions. Because intuition is
not my passion. It's my strength.
Speaker 2 (34:17):
What's your passion?
Speaker 3 (34:18):
My passion is writing, okay, and my passion is community.
I love teaching. Every book I write as a textbook.
I write as a book that people will go into the.
Speaker 2 (34:28):
World, and because that makes sense.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
Practitioners and teach My passion is community. My husband says,
I can make a party out of anything, and it's
funny because I'm an incredible introvert. So it would be
wonderful if our educational systems said, okay, here are strengths.
Because the strength was never going to be memorization. You know,
I couldn't for the life of me remember the periodic tables.
(34:50):
But my strength was being able to find something in
a mathematical equation without going through the steps. For example,
the wormhole this reality and this reality, you know, or
between where we are now and the goal. And I
often have my students do a healing where they create
a wormhole where this hand is where they are now, okay,
(35:13):
And where this hand is where they want to go,
And the space between is actually all the healings, all
the things in the world, and all the things in
themselves that need to shift. And then I have them
suspend the illusion of separateness, because separateness is an illusion,
and bring the present and the desired future together, And
(35:33):
I say, don't be rigid about this. You may want
to take your hands, you may want to move, you
may want to put air between do whatever it is
you are led to do, be fully both in the
present and in that desired future, without having to see
it or know it. And then when their hands come together,
the healing is done. And I have them take the
hand of the person who got them there, because we
(35:56):
forget we do a lot for ourselves.
Speaker 1 (35:58):
I took a form of a time class a few
years ago, and you can actually feel the energy, beat,
the heat and the energy between your hands if you
hold them close or with anybody else's.
Speaker 2 (36:08):
So that's powerful, I think.
Speaker 3 (36:09):
And what's really interesting is if you teach a form
of healing, and if you go over someone's body, you'll
see some places you can bring your hands close, and
some of them. The energy is really far away. Yes,
you know how to balance. We are all intuitives, we
are all healers, and we're really all catalysts for one another.
You know. One of the things I really love about
(36:31):
my students, and I saw this during COVID, where people
were amazing. They were paying each other's rents, they were
bringing medicine, you know, first responders, We're bringing things, you know,
finding diapers for baby. I mean, it was just they
were an amazing group, but we are not separate. So
when you suspend that illusion, what happens is you begin
to know ways to work and channel that togetherness. Yeah,
(36:56):
and that's so powerful to be able to do, and
it makes strangers friends.
Speaker 1 (37:03):
So much of your work is about self and self work.
And then I'm now hearing you have this real passion
for togetherness and community. How do they work in tangent
with each other in terms of healing.
Speaker 3 (37:14):
I'm my own worst healer and I'm my own worst
intuitive because I also am my own pattern. I need
other people to challenge me, to reveal things to me,
to be examples for me. And I really love it
when people come together, especially with the intention of everyone
(37:38):
being raised up.
Speaker 1 (37:40):
Well, you wrote that every one of us was a
wee before we became an eye, and so there is
sort of this collective origin. Pardon but you cite it,
and I think it's like the idea of collective origin
is interesting.
Speaker 3 (37:53):
Well, I mean also just structurally and psychologically, when you're born,
you have needs, but you don't have a sense of
self apart from your environment. And psychologists see this from
children's art, that they don't have a sense that mommy
is separate from me, or the toy is separate from me.
(38:14):
And actually, you know, when they're potty training sometimes it's
really scary because they see something separate from them. So
the sense of separateness is a very important thing we
acquire because of course, if you're not separate, you cannot
be in relationship because you're not separate, and you can't
have impact on anything because you're not separate. So that separateness,
(38:39):
that individuation, is such an important part of being able
to create in the world. And we all do create
in the world, but when we create together, we really
mirror the energetic reality that we are one. And now
this is science. It was spirituality and parapsychology when I
(38:59):
was young in the sixties, but now we've measured it.
Now we've quantified it. So we want to be separate
from that oneness, at least for the time that we
are in a body, because we can't create merge, we
can't relate merge, and that separateness is really hard. It's
(39:21):
hard to be an eye and it's hard to be
an eye in a world that we will never completely understand,
which is why taking an action. And the prism is
full of actions. It says, try this tiny thing today,
or here's a thought experiment just for today, tiny little thing,
(39:43):
and notice what changes in your external world, because in
your internal world is too subjective. You don't know.
Speaker 1 (39:52):
There's this one part of the ego center that you
call functional vulnerability.
Speaker 2 (39:56):
Am I getting that correct?
Speaker 3 (39:58):
There is always aulnerability. Every ego center has a vulnerability.
So we are doing the third ego center, which is
your diaphragm. Vulnerability is powerlessness.
Speaker 2 (40:10):
And you said that one's always a little shaky.
Speaker 3 (40:13):
Well, no, the polarity.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
Okay, I think I'm misunderstanding. Yes, you can put your
professor hat on, please teach me.
Speaker 3 (40:20):
I'm going to give you an example of what we're
working on. Every part of you has a vulnerability, just
like every part of you has a strength. Right, So
the vulnerability of your drive is the powerlessness you feel
when you drive and the world doesn't cooperate with you.
(40:41):
The polarity of that is you know, of course we
want to drive forward, but learning when to surrender, not
because it's a spiritual thing to do, but because you
can push that wall as much as you want, it's
not going to move. You've got to find another way.
So the functional vulnerability is where, because of what it is,
(41:04):
it's challenged in a certain way. Our feeling of value
and our value in the world is constantly challenged by
our sense of worth, and so in a way, our
vulnerability is something that we have to accept. You know,
there's people who always have to feel powerful and in control.
We all know those, right, those bombastic walkover people. You
(41:29):
don't want to be next to them at a dinner
party or you know, in front of them in line
at a Starbucks, and they're not functional. You want to
be able to say, Okay, this is the vulnerability here.
When I accept that, I'm able to work through the strength.
Speaker 2 (41:48):
So what do you think the cost of not recognizing
this is like, what is the cost of not doing
the work?
Speaker 3 (41:56):
It depends how damaged your life is. And you know that.
By your life, I mean if you're well partnered, if
you are successful, if you're doing something you love, if
you've built the community and family you want, if you
love where you live, if you're healthy, then no cost
until something challenges you. Still, if you've been structured well
(42:18):
in your early life, there's probably no cost. But if
there are things in your life, especially things that chronically
don't work out, like your relationship, you know, you don't
quite ever have that or I work a lot with actors.
Those actors who stay on the plateau, they don't fall off,
but they never really get you know, and they're not
(42:40):
happy there. Some people are happy there, you know, but
they're not happy there. If you are not creating, if
you're not able to create what it is you want
to create, that's the cost of not working on your prism.
And we are taught to manage our intellect over a
lifetime to our emotions over a lifetime. In a way,
(43:02):
therapy just does more of what you were taught by
your parents in a nursery school. We're not taught to
manage our intuition. We're not taught to manage the fact
that if you are arguing with your boss in your head,
why wonder why they're defensive or why they're not attracted
(43:22):
to you, or you're creating that. And when you're aware
of the non local, when you're aware of the intuitive,
when you are aware that you're afraid of a future
that you can change right now, when you're aware that
you can use intuition to really experience another person's prism
what they want. You know, we all think everybody wants
(43:45):
what we want, and actually everyone doesn't want what we want.
Everyone is incredibly unique, Like, not everybody wants companionship. For me,
that's unbelievable that everyone doesn't want companionship, you know, if
they're alone, Wow, But actually everyone doesn't. Some people just
want closet space and freedom and not being tied down
(44:05):
or responsible.
Speaker 1 (44:06):
Or account I have the opposite question, which is what
do you want people to know about the version of
themselves on the other side of some of this prison work.
Speaker 3 (44:15):
First of all, what you fantasize that you want to be,
you really can be. It's never the way you fantasize
it because you're fantasizing from the past. You're fantasizing from
an old paradigm, but the experience of what you want
is available to you. And it's part of what I
don't like about visualization. Again, you visualize what you want,
(44:37):
which maybe once you were given. It's funny my husband
said to me a couple of years ago, he said,
you really love like cooking and serving everybody, And I'm like, no,
I don't. Actually I do it because I want the
people around me to feel safe and comfortable and nourished,
(44:58):
but I don't enjoy doing it. And it completely changed
the prism of our relationship because now I do mourning
because I'm a morning person and he does night and
so now I have a relationship that actually allows me
to do a lot for myself that I wouldn't ever
really have permitted myself. I did have a goal, and
(45:21):
the goal was to get this book done. I mean,
most of my other books I had to write very quickly.
I had fifteen years to test this out on thousands
of people and to really enjoy it. And then I
found the perfect publisher to publish it. This is costly
for a publisher. They did a beautiful job.
Speaker 1 (45:41):
You also had one of the best book publicists I've
ever worked with.
Speaker 3 (45:45):
Oh I love Sarah Hall.
Speaker 2 (45:47):
It was air Donna, Yes, yr Denya.
Speaker 3 (45:50):
But she works with Sarah Hall. Amazing publicists. They are lovely,
really lovely good people. And I have to say that
Sarah had you know, even when I'm not writing, I
still want a community. So Sarah has really been with
me through all of the iterations of my career. You know,
(46:10):
I've been closing, and I've been kind of, you know,
under the radar, and then the hottest thing again. You know,
we all have our pond slime and then we're stars.
And it's wonderful that it goes up and down, because
if it were always up, it would be very exhausting.
Speaker 1 (46:25):
Do you ever work with intuitives when you feel like
you can't figure something out.
Speaker 3 (46:30):
All the time? You do? I train intuitives, So I
do something called boot camp, and I don't take clients.
I work with four companies and that's it. The rest
of the time. I read my students in workshops or
I read them on my lives, on my Instagram lives.
But one of the wonderful things about training intuitives is
(46:52):
that I get amazing readings. I mean, I just had
an intuitive that I trained this morning. That's something I'm
trying to figure out. We're working on the third Eco Center,
which is about manifestation. I manifested something I wanted for years,
but now I have to decide if I really wanted
or not, which I didn't really investigate as much as
maybe I should. And so even though now she's a professional,
(47:17):
my students are dear and they will read cool and
I send them clients because people reach out to me
and I say, what do you need a reading on,
and then I find them the right student. Of course,
I don't charge my students for sending them work, so
of course I use intuitives. Oh my goodness. And my husband,
who's a screen and TV writer, he used to be
(47:38):
as intuitive as a rock. He just refused he was
an intellectual. And I finally said to him, you know,
when I ask you whether I should do this, I
don't want your intellectual answer based on experience which may
not be relevant. I don't want your emotional answer. I
don't want your judgment. I want your attention to go
(47:58):
to the future when I've done this, and I want
you to be able to accurately tell me what the
result is so that I can revise now, and I said,
otherwise I feel alone. It was beautifully manipulative of me,
because my husband does not want me to feel alone.
And now he is one of my best intuitives. And
it's deep into his work also because now when he writes,
(48:21):
a character really becomes them, because that is an intuitive gift,
the ability to become something else and speak from it
with its voice.
Speaker 1 (48:31):
So part of the goal setting that I've noticed is
really asking yourself questions. And I love questions. I'm a
journalist by trade, so I love them to begin with.
I really believe that questions are like a fundamental, very
easy thing that we can all tap into to help
amplify our lives.
Speaker 3 (48:50):
Absolutely, because there are no answers. An answer is good
in such a narrow space. But when you're asking the
right questions, you keep adjust this moment. And that's really
what makes a successful life is the ability to adjust
every moment, even your im statements. They shouldn't be able
(49:10):
to be manipulated or crushed by your world, but they
should be semi permeable. They should be able to take
in new information so that you can become what you
didn't even know because you didn't experience it ever before.
You can become what you want to become, to find
the world that you want to find.
Speaker 1 (49:30):
Absolutely right, And I do feel like questions are at
the crux of that. You've been doing this for over
forty years. I'm wondering if you have a question about
intuition that you ponder often, or something you don't have
an exact answer for.
Speaker 3 (49:46):
I mean, I have so many. I mean I live
in a world of questions. I think that you know
life and death for me just because so many people
in my family have suicided. So life and death for
me have always been kind of an interesting boundary to
sit on. I know that I get very accurate information
(50:10):
and actually can describe people who have died the energy
that was left here, is it actually the dead person?
Like I went to a high school that's all math
and science. Now I'm very much more math and science
than a language person. So I am the original skeptic.
But I don't want the answer to that question. I
(50:32):
don't want the answer to the question of exactly I
have a sense of what happens after we perceive that
we die, But there are things I actually don't want
to know, because I want to be committed to the
human experience. And I think that one thing intuition does
that isn't good is it allows you to really experience
(50:54):
the oneness, and it allows you to make all the
right moves and create all the right things for yourself
without experiencing anything. And that's not being alive. And I
really am. I'm committed to the experience of being alive,
even though sometimes it's very painful and sometimes I don't
(51:15):
feel quite up to the task. I do my own work.
I was saying before that a lot of my books.
I've written two books came as life saving downloads. One
was The Circle, and this I realized was downloaded to
me when I was really a little child, and it
just took maturity and the ability to teach it to
(51:36):
people so I could see that it had an effect
outside of myself. This really helped me create a life
that I mean, I wake up I am pretty much
the sole survivor, and I wake up and I think wow.
And I don't always feel blessed. Sometimes I feel anxious.
I mean, I still my childhood waking up with small children.
(51:57):
I didn't know how to take care of, and a
mother who I didn't know if i'd find dead or
half dead. But I think how broken, cracked and bent
my prism started as both neurologically, genetically and in terms
of experience, how fortunate I am, how okay it is
that I'm imperfect because I've created such a wonderful life.
(52:20):
And I think that all of us have to remind ourselves.
You know, what standard are we holding ourselves too? In
my family, just being alive as a high standard. You
know you have not taken your own life that is
already a high standard. I see people reach out to
me by email or on Instagram or through my website
when they're in real pain.
Speaker 2 (52:40):
Yeah they're seeking, But you know, we don't seek.
Speaker 3 (52:43):
When we're okay, and we shouldn't seek when we're okay.
We should be in the okay, we should joy, we
should be in the moment. But people feel they've ruined
their lives so many times, and I want to tell them, honey,
I have ruined my life more times than I can
tell you. But when you do the prison work, when
you do go work, when you just put one foot
(53:06):
in front of the other, you will get somewhere that
you want to go. Pain really hurts, you know, the
way people judge their pain. Oh, I shouldn't feel so badly.
At least I have food on the table. Yeah, you're
still allowed to feel badly and feel sorry for somelf.
Oh I shouldn't feel so badly. You know this, But
I have so much wealth, and you are allowed. If
(53:28):
you didn't want, you wouldn't create. And I think that
that misplaced self judgment. It's good to be judged. When
you do something wrong, you should rectify it. I think
it is good to be an integral person, but we
judge ourselves so harshly, both for what we achieve and
also for what we want. You know, why shouldn't someone
(53:50):
want a great car? If they want a great car,
that's a symbol. We live in a world of symbols.
You know, you're working hard at something. Why should shouldn't
you want to really be the entirety of everything you
can be? That is a very healthy thing. You know,
Martyrs are not healthy people. That's a psychiatric disorder.
Speaker 1 (54:12):
I actually think that's the big takeaway from our conversation today.
Speaker 2 (54:16):
I had a lot of takeaways from the book.
Speaker 1 (54:17):
But today I'm really hearing you say, go forth in
all of your wants, but.
Speaker 3 (54:23):
Pick three because one of the problems we have is
we hop around. Then we have a lot of unfinished projects.
Speaker 2 (54:32):
Okay, and so what are your three wants right now?
Speaker 3 (54:35):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (54:36):
Are you able to share?
Speaker 3 (54:38):
All of my three wants go under one umbrella, and
that umbrella is my family. But within that, you know
the joy I get from teachings. I want a community
to teach and to learn from that has ease to it.
You know, this is the first book I've published in
fourteen years, so I'm teaching a very specific thing in
(55:00):
the past, which is intuitive development. I want to teach this.
The other ones they all fit under that umbrella. But
they are a little private.
Speaker 1 (55:09):
That's totally okay. I actually kind of like that. I
think they are private. Maybe they should stay that way
for everybody, you know.
Speaker 3 (55:15):
Sometimes, you know, I definitely ask my community please support me.
This is important to me. Please support me in this
because it is wonderful to give voice to things, because
then you can cultivate support. It's easy for me to
talk about really wanting to be happy. And I have
been successful in the world, but successful to me means
(55:39):
I can do a prison group anywhere in the world
any time I want, with a week's notice, you know,
and have a group of amazing, capable people changing their lives,
whereas some of the more heart centered goals are a
little more difficult to express on a show.
Speaker 2 (55:58):
My last question for you, Laura.
Speaker 1 (56:01):
I saw Trevor Noah ask Oprah this and I thought
it was a really interesting question. He said, You've interviewed
so many of the most quote unquote successful people in
the world. Is there anything that you see they have
in common? You've done the same, You've worked with so
many successful people.
Speaker 2 (56:16):
Do you see a through line?
Speaker 3 (56:18):
I mean, actually, the through line is that they're intuitive
and that they apply their intuition. Not intuitive in terms
of I believe this is going to happen, But they
do have goals and their attention takes them to how
to create them. So they are intuitive, sometimes without knowing
they're intuitive. They work intuitively because logic is flawed because
(56:43):
it's only as good as the data it has, whereas
intuition gives you exactly the data you need. And so
every ego center in the prism does have an intuitive
work that I want people to do because what it
allows you to do is to put your life on autumn,
a pilot in a way so that you can be
present in the moment. But the future comes in when
(57:06):
you need that information to pivot, or the past comes
in when you need to reframe something to be able
to grow into who you want to be in that moment.
It's almost harder intuitively to read someone's past than their future.
That their future is clean. Their past they have judgment
and projections about, but we can change those and it
(57:26):
changes us.
Speaker 2 (57:28):
Thank you so much. I really appreciate your time.
Speaker 3 (57:31):
Thank you, this is really lovely.
Speaker 1 (57:38):
Okay, you know what time it is. Today's a good day,
to have a good day. I'll see you next week.
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