April 30, 2025 • 8 mins
And to be honest, I don't think we could care less about it... Plus, Chrissie has a new conspiracy theory brewing around Nicole Kidman.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Let's go click and Chrissy's click face. Let's talk Beyonce.
She's all over our feeds. Yeah, extraordinary. The Cowboy Katera
tour has kicked off. Looks unbelievable, as is what we
would expect from Queen b. Real star of the show though,
and the person getting even more attention than Beyonce is
(00:29):
her daughter Blue Ivy.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
You and I think just sat through those two songs
watching footage of Blue Ivy and she first started bringing
Blue Ivy on stage in the Renaissance tour in twenty
twenty three.
Speaker 1 (00:40):
She was a little kid then. Yeah, and even that
was two years ago. I could not be I'm watching
this child and I'm like, well, this woman on this tour,
and I'm like, it's like Beyonce but twenty years ago.
This girl is thirteen years old. She looks like a
grown woman, a magnificent grown warm.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
I thought she was seventeen.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
She's just turned thirteen. Wow, I got the moves, my god.
I mean, she's a pure bread.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
She's improved a lot too, which is like really cool
to see.
Speaker 1 (01:11):
No's the way around the stage. Yeah, the May I'm
looking at some May twenty twenty three, footage. You just
look like she's going through the motor.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
She's marking as we would say.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Margie, I'm really giving it. And she wasn't the only
child that hit the stage with her famous mom little Roomy.
We got to we got to see Roomy as well.
But where was the where was the other boy? The
boy child?
Speaker 2 (01:31):
Sir?
Speaker 1 (01:32):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Maybe she was singing because she sung this song with
them on stage Protector, which is off the new album.
Maybe she's only protecting the gals.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
But you want to see him?
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (01:44):
I love his name, sir, Yes, sir, even sir is
a great name.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
Yeah, Roomy's not, but sir, no.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Roomy reminds me of like an old Queensland bus driver
with cloudy eyes. He was a bit roomy.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
Anyway, I'm going to really enjoy these tour snippets.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
It's quite interesting seeing like on TikTok the two tours
that have spotlights on them is the Katy Perry Lifetimes
Tour and now the Cowboy Carter Tour.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
What are we going to do about Katie Perry?
Speaker 2 (02:14):
I know we're going to talk about her before four
because she's released a statement.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
Why I know, let's say that stop. All right, let's
move on to this cheeky silly student. Imagine this. You're
climbing up Mount Fuji and you get altitude sickness, which
is really bad. By the way, have you heard about
altitude sickness? You get really sick, yes, really really sick. Anyways,
(02:39):
rescue taken down to the bottom of the mountain. The
Japanese rescuers are like, don't do that again.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
Oh so he went up there when he shouldn't have.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
He went up there, and well, you're allowed to climb it,
but if you get sick, that's sick.
Speaker 3 (02:51):
Don't do it again.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Four days later, he's realized, oh my god, I'll let
my phone up there. He's gone up to get it,
and guess who we had to call again, the cops,
the rescueus. He's been rescued twice airlifted. Can you imagine,
well that.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
Costs if I left my phone at the top of
a mountain. I've got eye clouds so everything's backed up.
I would see that as an excuse to go and
get a fresh new phone.
Speaker 1 (03:17):
Actually, yes, yes, I might might just throw mine out
the window now. The Chrissy Swan Show, The Chrissy Swan show.
Let's talk Katy Perry, Chrissy's cliche. Do you know what
the problem is Katy Perry. She can't get a break.
And I reckon it started with that swish thing years
(03:40):
ago and I saw a sight of her then that
I went.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
Oh yeah, she changed there your dag.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
And then now she cannot shake it off, even when
she does fantastic performances like she did at the AFL
Grand Final, all of.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
That stuff, she can't shake the goof.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
She can't shake the bad press to the space she
went into space. We haven't even talked about that. How embarrassing.
She just looked just like a goof off, embarrassing.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
Just goofy, goofy, goofy.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
And it doesn't land, and she's not selling out any
tours in America. And then she's paid homage to her
eleven minute space trip within the show with all goofy costumes.
And anyway, the latest is I want.
Speaker 3 (04:25):
To like Katie.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
I just want to put it out because I love
her back catalog. So do I just stop doing lange, like,
don't stop it, stop it, Catherine, stop it a okay,
but she's posted a lengthy statement to Instagram.
Speaker 1 (04:38):
She has and I'm not going to read it to
you because you will just.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Lose you make it's in your favorite part.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Okay, here is my favorite part. There is actually something
good that she said in there.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
She says that a therapist once said something to her
years ago. And if you know what, trying to get
therapy in this country is like, don't bother ten sessions,
all this stuff, you've got to go through hoops. But
here she's giving you what she got from it for free.
No one can make you believe something about yourself that
you don't already believe about yourself. That's good. That's some
(05:13):
good stuff there. And then she says some other things
about she's a I'm on a human journey, playing the
game of life with an audience of many. Sometimes I fall,
but I can no.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
No, you know what I want to say to these
artists as well, It's not that deep. Not everything has
to be so profound, And so I think that's where
we see the sort of inauthentic or inauthenticity.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
I agree with you. I think, do you know.
Speaker 3 (05:43):
Who's great like just enjoying life?
Speaker 2 (05:45):
Dua Lipa, Charlie XCX, all these people that were loving
even Taylor to an extent, doesn't go as deep and
whacko as Catherine Perry.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Great just so she does say I find people to
lock eyes within the audience and I sing with and
I know that we are healing each other. I'm trying
to do that with my kids in the kitchen with
the Dibie brothers. It's not that interesting.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
I like doing it on the street with strangers. Yeah,
I know you do, alright, my girl, Nicle Kidman.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Nicole Kidman is look, I want to start a new
conspiracy theory here in that there is actually three of her.
I was going to say too, but there's actually three
Nicole Kidman's. This woman is releasing yet another series. Wow,
she's back in that nine Perfect Strangers as the creepy
Russian Wellness Gurul Marsha.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
I really enjoyed that first season that was shown in
Byron bay Jack.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
I don't know why I can't watch her. I wonder
what I mean. Lord knows that there is a great
smallgas board of options for me too. She's in something
new every five minutes. I try them.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
All, and I would think you'd like her because the
gays love you, and we also love Nicole kidman, like,
there's a ven diagram there where you guys should meet.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Maybe I'm just jealous.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
Maybe maybe should we listen to the trailer of nine
Perfect Strange and I'm.
Speaker 1 (07:04):
Jealous for how long she spends out of her house
away from her Welcome everyone, we can begin. We invited
you all here because sometimes you shouldn't deal with pain gently. Wait,
this is not as spose.
Speaker 3 (07:19):
She's going to bleach our brains Darling.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Oh god, are we actually supposed to drink this? You
came to me, are broken, and you'll break and writ
to hear.
Speaker 3 (07:34):
Love it.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
God. That's that last bit of scraping was just me
trying to turn the television as soon as I hear that.
What is that accent? A Russian woman via Penrith.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
Her accent is like terrible and merry go around and.
Speaker 1 (07:48):
There was someone, Christine, someone was in there. She goes
going to bleach our brains Darling, Baransky, Baransky, She's fabulous.
Speaker 3 (07:57):
And the Aussie dude who was in the first season of.
Speaker 1 (07:59):
The White This is what happens. I sit down, I
have my cup of tea. I love it, I love it,
I love it. And then Nicole comes on and I go,
I gotta get out of here.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
Well, for those of you like me who love it,
it's on Prime Video May twenty two.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Well, do you know what I do? Love you, and
I'll be back here tomorrow to see you. Tomorrow's last
day that we give someone a chance to win that
six thousand dollars tennis bracelet. Get onto the No over
player and registered alcobike. Check out The Chrissy Swan Show
is a Nova podcast. For more great comedy shows like this,
head to novapodcast dot com. Do you
Let's go click and Chrissy's click face. Let's talk Beyonce.
She's all over our feeds. Yeah, extraordinary. The Cowboy Katera
tour has kicked off. Looks unbelievable, as is what we
would expect from Queen b. Real star of the show though,
and the person getting even more attention than Beyonce is
(00:29):
her daughter Blue Ivy.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
You and I think just sat through those two songs
watching footage of Blue Ivy and she first started bringing
Blue Ivy on stage in the Renaissance tour in twenty
twenty three.
Speaker 1 (00:40):
She was a little kid then. Yeah, and even that
was two years ago. I could not be I'm watching
this child and I'm like, well, this woman on this tour,
and I'm like, it's like Beyonce but twenty years ago.
This girl is thirteen years old. She looks like a
grown woman, a magnificent grown warm.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
I thought she was seventeen.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
She's just turned thirteen. Wow, I got the moves, my god.
I mean, she's a pure bread.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
She's improved a lot too, which is like really cool
to see.
Speaker 1 (01:11):
No's the way around the stage. Yeah, the May I'm
looking at some May twenty twenty three, footage. You just
look like she's going through the motor.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
She's marking as we would say.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Margie, I'm really giving it. And she wasn't the only
child that hit the stage with her famous mom little Roomy.
We got to we got to see Roomy as well.
But where was the where was the other boy? The
boy child?
Speaker 2 (01:31):
Sir?
Speaker 1 (01:32):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Maybe she was singing because she sung this song with
them on stage Protector, which is off the new album.
Maybe she's only protecting the gals.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
But you want to see him?
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (01:44):
I love his name, sir, Yes, sir, even sir is
a great name.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
Yeah, Roomy's not, but sir, no.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Roomy reminds me of like an old Queensland bus driver
with cloudy eyes. He was a bit roomy.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
Anyway, I'm going to really enjoy these tour snippets.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
It's quite interesting seeing like on TikTok the two tours
that have spotlights on them is the Katy Perry Lifetimes
Tour and now the Cowboy Carter Tour.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
What are we going to do about Katie Perry?
Speaker 2 (02:14):
I know we're going to talk about her before four
because she's released a statement.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
Why I know, let's say that stop. All right, let's
move on to this cheeky silly student. Imagine this. You're
climbing up Mount Fuji and you get altitude sickness, which
is really bad. By the way, have you heard about
altitude sickness? You get really sick, yes, really really sick. Anyways,
(02:39):
rescue taken down to the bottom of the mountain. The
Japanese rescuers are like, don't do that again.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
Oh so he went up there when he shouldn't have.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
He went up there, and well, you're allowed to climb it,
but if you get sick, that's sick.
Speaker 3 (02:51):
Don't do it again.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Four days later, he's realized, oh my god, I'll let
my phone up there. He's gone up to get it,
and guess who we had to call again, the cops,
the rescueus. He's been rescued twice airlifted. Can you imagine,
well that.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
Costs if I left my phone at the top of
a mountain. I've got eye clouds so everything's backed up.
I would see that as an excuse to go and
get a fresh new phone.
Speaker 1 (03:17):
Actually, yes, yes, I might might just throw mine out
the window now. The Chrissy Swan Show, The Chrissy Swan show.
Let's talk Katy Perry, Chrissy's cliche. Do you know what
the problem is Katy Perry. She can't get a break.
And I reckon it started with that swish thing years
(03:40):
ago and I saw a sight of her then that
I went.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
Oh yeah, she changed there your dag.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
And then now she cannot shake it off, even when
she does fantastic performances like she did at the AFL
Grand Final, all of.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
That stuff, she can't shake the goof.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
She can't shake the bad press to the space she
went into space. We haven't even talked about that. How embarrassing.
She just looked just like a goof off, embarrassing.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
Just goofy, goofy, goofy.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
And it doesn't land, and she's not selling out any
tours in America. And then she's paid homage to her
eleven minute space trip within the show with all goofy costumes.
And anyway, the latest is I want.
Speaker 3 (04:25):
To like Katie.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
I just want to put it out because I love
her back catalog. So do I just stop doing lange, like,
don't stop it, stop it, Catherine, stop it a okay,
but she's posted a lengthy statement to Instagram.
Speaker 1 (04:38):
She has and I'm not going to read it to
you because you will just.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Lose you make it's in your favorite part.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Okay, here is my favorite part. There is actually something
good that she said in there.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
She says that a therapist once said something to her
years ago. And if you know what, trying to get
therapy in this country is like, don't bother ten sessions,
all this stuff, you've got to go through hoops. But
here she's giving you what she got from it for free.
No one can make you believe something about yourself that
you don't already believe about yourself. That's good. That's some
(05:13):
good stuff there. And then she says some other things
about she's a I'm on a human journey, playing the
game of life with an audience of many. Sometimes I fall,
but I can no.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
No, you know what I want to say to these
artists as well, It's not that deep. Not everything has
to be so profound, And so I think that's where
we see the sort of inauthentic or inauthenticity.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
I agree with you. I think, do you know.
Speaker 3 (05:43):
Who's great like just enjoying life?
Speaker 2 (05:45):
Dua Lipa, Charlie XCX, all these people that were loving
even Taylor to an extent, doesn't go as deep and
whacko as Catherine Perry.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Great just so she does say I find people to
lock eyes within the audience and I sing with and
I know that we are healing each other. I'm trying
to do that with my kids in the kitchen with
the Dibie brothers. It's not that interesting.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
I like doing it on the street with strangers. Yeah,
I know you do, alright, my girl, Nicle Kidman.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Nicole Kidman is look, I want to start a new
conspiracy theory here in that there is actually three of her.
I was going to say too, but there's actually three
Nicole Kidman's. This woman is releasing yet another series. Wow,
she's back in that nine Perfect Strangers as the creepy
Russian Wellness Gurul Marsha.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
I really enjoyed that first season that was shown in
Byron bay Jack.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
I don't know why I can't watch her. I wonder
what I mean. Lord knows that there is a great
smallgas board of options for me too. She's in something
new every five minutes. I try them.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
All, and I would think you'd like her because the
gays love you, and we also love Nicole kidman, like,
there's a ven diagram there where you guys should meet.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Maybe I'm just jealous.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
Maybe maybe should we listen to the trailer of nine
Perfect Strange and I'm.
Speaker 1 (07:04):
Jealous for how long she spends out of her house
away from her Welcome everyone, we can begin. We invited
you all here because sometimes you shouldn't deal with pain gently. Wait,
this is not as spose.
Speaker 3 (07:19):
She's going to bleach our brains Darling.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Oh god, are we actually supposed to drink this? You
came to me, are broken, and you'll break and writ
to hear.
Speaker 3 (07:34):
Love it.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
God. That's that last bit of scraping was just me
trying to turn the television as soon as I hear that.
What is that accent? A Russian woman via Penrith.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
Her accent is like terrible and merry go around and.
Speaker 1 (07:48):
There was someone, Christine, someone was in there. She goes
going to bleach our brains Darling, Baransky, Baransky, She's fabulous.
Speaker 3 (07:57):
And the Aussie dude who was in the first season of.
Speaker 1 (07:59):
The White This is what happens. I sit down, I
have my cup of tea. I love it, I love it,
I love it. And then Nicole comes on and I go,
I gotta get out of here.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
Well, for those of you like me who love it,
it's on Prime Video May twenty two.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Well, do you know what I do? Love you, and
I'll be back here tomorrow to see you. Tomorrow's last
day that we give someone a chance to win that
six thousand dollars tennis bracelet. Get onto the No over
player and registered alcobike. Check out The Chrissy Swan Show
is a Nova podcast. For more great comedy shows like this,
head to novapodcast dot com. Do you
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