Finding Your Rhythm: The Biblical Alternative to Work-Life Balance

💡 Episode Summary

Are you tired of chasing the myth of "work-life balance"? In this game-changing episode, Jim Burgoon reveals why this popular concept is a perfectionist trap that leads to exhaustion, and offers a powerful, biblical alternative: living in your divine rhythm. Blending psychology and scripture, Jim explains how to shift from a life of anxious control to one of surrendered peace. This episode is a lifeline for any leader, entrepreneur, or creator who is ready to stop juggling and start living with purpose, presence, and a sustainable pace.

🧭 Key Takeaways

• Balance is a myth; rhythm is reality. Life happens in seasons, and trying to give equal weight to everything at all times leads to failure.
• Balance is about control; rhythm is about surrender. True peace comes from walking in step with the Spirit (Galatians 5:25), not from managing every detail perfectly.
• A need for control is often a sign of an unhealed nervous system. Chasing balance can be a trauma response, an attempt to feel safe and worthy through productivity.
• Priorities drive productivity, not the other way around. When you focus on your God-given priorities for the season, the most important things get done.
• Jesus didn't live a balanced life; He lived a prioritized life. He modeled a divine rhythm, showing us how to sleep in the storm and move with purpose.

📖 Faith Connections

• Galatians 5:25: The call to "keep in step with the Spirit" is the foundation of a life in rhythm.
• Luke 10:40–42: The story of Martha and Mary illustrates the critical difference between anxious "doing" and peaceful "being."
• Genesis 1-2: The creation story reveals God's own pattern of purposeful work followed by intentional rest.
• Isaiah 26:3: "You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you." Peace comes from focus on God, not from perfectly juggling life's demands.

💬 Favorite Quotes

• "Balance is a nice word for perfectionism, dressed up in productivity language."
• "You can sleep in chaos when you live under the divine rhythm."
• "The myth of balance is more about you, your ego, and your control, and not about what God wants to do in you and through you."
• "If we think everything is a non-negotiable, then nothing is a priority."

💭 Reflection Questions

1. What are your 3–5 non-negotiables in this season of life and leadership?
2. What can you pause without guilt for the next 30 days?
3. What distractions are keeping you from your mission—and how can you remove them?

✝️ Leadership Insight

The modern leadership mantra is to "hustle" and "optimize." But the Kingdom model is counter-cultural: presence over productivity. As a leader, your greatest asset isn't your ability to manage a schedule, but your ability to maintain your connection to the heartbeat of God. A leader in rhythm can discern the right "yes" and the right "no," and can lead their team from a place of overflow, not from the dregs of their own energy. This is the only path to sustainable, impactful leadership.

⚙️ Episode Connections

• Next Episode: Recognizing and Recovering from Burnout — Finding Rest in God’s Presence.

Resources

• Join the Newsletter: www.leadwithjim.com/nl
• Full Episode Show Notes & Transcript: www.leadwithjim.com/podcast

Connect with Jim

• 🌐 Website:

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
People love talking aboutbalance, but I'm here to tell you
balance is a myth.
Break free from the burnout.
Find your true north.
With your guy Jim Burgoonstepping forward, this is the unshakable

(00:33):
life.
Hey, friend, welcome back tothe show.
You know, we all go after thiscoveted balance, this work life balance,
this ministry life balance,because we want to feel like our
life is meaningful and that wehave this perfect balance between
what we do and what God'scalled us to and the life we want
to enjoy.

(00:53):
But here's the truth.
It's a myth.
Balance is a nice word fordressed up in productivity, language.
And what it's doing, it'skeeping you exhausted.
Today, I want to shift fromthe holy grail of balance and move
it into the word rhythm.
So let's break down the mythof balance.
Just for funds, let's say thateverything gets equal weight.

(01:17):
Physical, 25%, spiritual, 25%.
Family, 25%.
Work, 25%.
Right?
But everyone who's ever livedknows that this doesn't actually
work out, because if you havesmall kids, there's a lot of time
your kids are going to needmore of you than you can give to
your job, or your kids aregoing to need more of you than you
can give to your church.

(01:38):
So, right.
There is already a hole inthis idea that we need to balance
everything.
And when we lean into thisidea of balance, what we're saying
or what we're ignoring is theebbs and flows of life.
Like seasons change.
There are seasons where your.
Your church or your ministryor your job or your entrepreneurial
journey will demand more of you.

(01:59):
And then there's season whereyour marriage is going to need more
of you.
And then there's seasons whereyour kids are going to need more
of you, like when they'rereally small versus when they're
young adults.
And the truth about balance.
Balance is about control.
It's rhythm is about surrender.
And that's a key because inpsychology, they call it adaptive
regulation.

(02:20):
And it's the ability to adjustand shift priorities based on your
internal or external environment.
And spiritually, that's whatit means.
To walk in step with theSpirit is to learn to be in rhythm
with the Spirit.
It's what Galatians 5.
25 says.
It says, since we live by theSpirit, let us keep in step with
the Spirit, where we have tomove from control and move into rhythm.

(02:44):
We have to move from needingto always make sure everything is
according to the perfectionistthat we deal with, and then move
into we have our being, ourbreath in Christ, and because of
that, we just live season, theseason, and whatever the season demands,
we give it, we show up, weshow out, but we're living in the

(03:05):
rhythm of it.
But we can lose the idea ofthat we need control and rest in
the idea that God is alreadyin the situation and we just have
to give 100% to whatever we'recalled to be in that situation.
So what does it mean, likefinding your rhythm?
What does that really look like?
It comes down to saying yesand no and reflecting what God's

(03:26):
heart is in that and notalways saying yes to everything and
not always saying no toeverything, but letting your yes
be yes and your no be no.
And it really boils back tostop fighting for approval, stop
fighting for performance, andmove into purpose.
And so if we have ourschedules and our yeses and all these

(03:47):
things that we're doing, we'reliving intentional lives on purpose,
for purpose in the season thatthat purpose needs us for.
And we've got to understandthat, like, if we think about this
biblically, sometimes rhythm,the divine rhythm, the rhythm that
Christ gives us is theundercurrent of our day.
Some days we're in themornings, we're fighting like David

(04:08):
down in the Battle of Goliath.
And maybe in the afternoon,we're like Elijah who's sitting by
the brook.
What's really about a rhythm of.
Because if you think about it,even your heartbeat has a specific
rhythm.
And if the rhythm is thrownoff, then they call that a problem,
right?
So if we understand that evenin the rhythm of a heartbeat, our
life could exist, shouldn'tthe external life exist similarly?

(04:31):
Like, there should be aheartbeat that we live by, that is,
that is dominated by ourvalues, that's dominated by the priorities
God has placed in our life andnot dominated by the trauma that
we're still trying to overcome.
And I find that the more thatwe have a need for control, the more
that we are anxious or, youknow, we get anxiety over the need

(04:52):
that we have to have balance.
We have to do all right, wehave to do this, we have to do that.
It's just an indicator or datathat says our nervous system isn't
healed, that it's.
It's us trying to control asituation to make us feel safe, to
make us feel productive, tomake us feel like we have work instead
of pulling back andunderstanding that the rhythm of
God is not about you beingproductive, but about you being.

(05:15):
It's not about you showing upand doing all the things, but about
you showing up and being enough.
And that when you team up withthe other ones that God puts in your
life, that's great andbeautiful things happen.
It's about those things andnot about what culture teaches us.
In that you have to be thegood mom, you have to be the good
husband, you have to be thegreat minister, you have to be a

(05:36):
great orator, you have to be agreat podcaster.
All of that is secondary,consequential to being human first,
but also being a human underthe direct God's divine direction
and his identity.
And out of that flowseverything else.
And if we're going to get intothe heartbeat of life, we got to

(05:57):
connect to the heartbeat of God.
And when we're connected tothat heartbeat, we walk and we breathe
and we live in rhythm.
What does it look like to beout of rhythm?
And I think the first and thebest biblical example is Martha.
Now, Martha didn't do anythingtruly wrong.
It was the culture to makesure that she had to have dinner.

(06:18):
She had to make sure she was agood host.
That was the Jewish culture ofthe time.
But we see Martha and Mary there.
Mary rested and just was likethere, like she was being.
She was at the foot of Jesuswhile Martha was doing all the responsibilities.
She was what psychology callsover functioning because you have
a very important person in theroom and you want to make everything
perfect.

(06:39):
You want to make sureeverything's clean and everything's
up to snuff and all those things.
And she was over functioningto the point where she asked Jesus
could she correct Mary forsitting at his feet?
And he didn't chide her, hedidn't shame her.
He didn't talk down to her.
He just said, this is the morepreferred thing, is to be first before
you do.
Like he didn't tell her to.

(06:59):
That's not right.
No, he knew the culture.
He.
He was basically pointing out,hey, let's focus on being at my feet
first before we do stuff inthe kitchen.
Let's focus at being andfinding the rhythm that is in my
be before you find the rhythmin your daily life.
That's what that story reallyshows us.
And we have to understand thatmany of us are more Martha's than

(07:23):
we're ever Mary's.
And I think that's why a lotof times we struggle with the need
for control, the need forbalance, is because we're out of
rhythm.
We would rather do and peopleplease and over function because
of our trauma and our frayednerves and Our nervous system, instead
of saying, hold on, wait asecond, let me sit at the feet of
Jesus, find the marchingorders, find the rhythm, and then

(07:45):
go out and do the thing.
And this is where the traumabecomes a challenge, because we have
to heal it with Jesus.
We have to heal it and retrainthe nervous system to say it's safe
to sit at the feet of Jesusand understand that everything else
will get done because we liveat a divine rhythm, not a divine
hustle.

(08:05):
We even see the divine rhythmin the creation story in Genesis,
like, he worked six days, herested one.
Like there's a rhythm to that.
And each day had a specifictask, a specific purpose.
And the first one was built sothat the second one could be built
and the second one couldn't bebuilt unless the first one was built.
And there was this structureand there was this rhythm to it.

(08:26):
And he shows us this and tellsus, even in your work, to rest.
And so we have to make surethat we balance it.
Like even sa.
You know, saba or Sabbathmeans to cease to.
To celebrate.
Because there has to be timeswhere we celebrate what we're doing
and not just constantly beingpulled down into and sucked into

(08:47):
the reality of it.
Like, we overdo and we overfunction until we're burnt out.
And I do have an episode onBurnout coming out next week, so
you may want to tune in forthat one to dive deeper into the
burnout story.
But here's what is reallypowerful with this.
Even your rest.
God is still at work.

(09:07):
Mary rested at Jesus's feet.
God was still working in our heart.
And we see this later inscripture with them.
You know, Martha worked, andeven later in scripture with a conversation,
she had a little bit differentunderstanding because she didn't
have the revelation Mary gotbecause Martha did and was distracted.
Luke 10:40 even says thatMartha was distracted by all the

(09:30):
preparations that had been made.
And sometimes we get sodistracted trying to find balance.
And you know, how, again, wego back to the original thing.
How do I focus on Jesus whilestill doing the thing?
And then I want to sit at hisfeet, but I have to do dinner and
I have to do this.
The first thing, the focusedthing, the intentional thing, is

(09:51):
sit at the feet of Jesus, findyour rhythm for the day, and then
go and live the rhythm.
Lose the sense of control,live in the surrender of it, and
you find that your life will.
Will just start to increaseand you'll find more joy.
So what's the.
What's the.
What's the skinny on it?
You know, we used to say,what's the skinny?
What's on the down low?
So when we get back to it, weunderstand that rhythm is about priorities.

(10:15):
Balance is about productivity.
Productivity and accomplishment.
Rhythm is about prioritiesbecause when you put your priorities
first, productivity comes after.
When you put your prioritiesfirst, everything gets done.
That's a priority.
Everything that doesn't getdone wasn't the priority, which means
it wasn't that important tobegin with.
And I think that we get intothis everything has to be done mentality

(10:39):
because we have this highexpectation on ourselves because
if we don't, then our worth issomehow less.
But when we realize that ourworth is never less than and that
if we live out our priorities,our values before the Lord Jesus
Christ in this world world,then here's the deal.
You will always have infiniteworth and your priorities will get
done.
Everything else can be delegated.

(11:00):
I mean, think about it.
Jesus didn't have a balanced life.
I mean he had a prioritized life.
He had what he had a life thatsaid, that literally lived on purpose.
Like when he said I have to gothrough Samaria when the average
cultural Jewish thing was togo around Samaria, he's like, no,
I gotta go through.
And you know, he lived at thisplace of utmost priority that he

(11:20):
heard and he listened to whatthe Father said and he went and did
it.
He lived in a rhythm.
And there were times where inthe midst of some chaos like the
storm, Jesus was sleeping inthe boat.
They had to wake the dude upto stop the storm.
Like that's rhythm, guys.
You can sleep in chaos whenyou live under the divine rhythm

(11:40):
because you're trusting in Godand you're trusting in what God does
in your life.
And you realize that the mythof balance is more about you, your
ego and your control and notabout what God wants to do in you
and through you.
So let me just leave it with this.
I'm going to ask you three questions.
The first question is what areyour non negotiables for this season?
Now every season changes.

(12:01):
These are not to be written in pen.
These are be written in pencil.
So I want you to journal theseand you can even shoot me at [e-mail].
let me hear some of your answers.
So what is your non negotiables?
What are your top priorities?
Give like three to five.
Don't give like 15.
Give three to five.
Okay, then you're going to askyourself of all the things you do,

(12:22):
what can wait?
What can take a pause.
Pausing for us feels unsafe.
Pausing feels icky.
But what can take a pause?
Like what can you say?
This can take a pause.
Don't give any justifications,don't give any excuses, just give
first instinct.
This can be paused.
There are some things thatcan't, but what can be?

(12:43):
And the last question is,what's distracting you from your
mission?
If it's distracting you fromyour mission and your purpose, then
that's got to go first.
That's not for you.
That's a distraction.
Distractions go away.
But we have to evaluate these things.
So make sure you ask thesethree questions, journal them down.
You can shoot me an email ifyou want to hear some feedback on

(13:03):
some of them.
But we're looking for rhythm.
Distractions break rhythm.
What if we do everything?
Then we accomplish nothing andthe reality comes back to if we think
everything is a nonnegotiable, then nothing is a priority.
So psychologically, clarityreduces anxiety.
Spiritually, clarity brings peace.
So these are what thesequestions are for.

(13:25):
This is why we're going tomove from the myth of balance into
the rhythm of God.
And Isaiah 6:3 says this, youkeep him in perfect peace whose mind
is stayed in you.
Peace comes from focus, notfrom juggling everything perfectly.
So, my friend, it may be timefor you to stop striving to balance

(13:46):
everything.
It's time for you to figureout your priorities and do those
first.
So this is your call out andyour encouragement to find the rhythm
that God has for you.
Your rhythm is not my rhythm.
My rhythm is not yours.
So let's find the rhythm Godhas for us and, and then let's make
sure and when we find thatrhythm, that we live it out on purpose,

(14:08):
intentionally for purpose.
And with that being said, takesome time this week to pray and ask
God to give you some, someclarity and some revelation on those
questions.
Ask him to help you feel theheartbeat of God.
Lord, let me feel yourheartbeat so that I can see where
I'm going.
And with all of that, justremember that there are going to

(14:29):
be changes in your life.
Embrace the change.
Be grateful for the change.
Because when you move fromcontrol to surrender, you have to
change things.
And part of that change ischanging how much you trust.
And if we put out more of ourtrust in God, then we're putting
it in the right place so thatthe rhythm of God will come through
us and that we will do what wewere called to do.

(14:54):
And.
And with that being said, I'llsee you on the next episode.
And remember, next week we'regoing to hit on burnout.
Thank you for spending thistime with me on the Unshakable Life
podcast.
My prayer is that today'sconversation helps you to build resilience,
reclaim peace and step withcourage into your God given calling.
If this episode has encouragedyou, challenged you or impacted you

(15:16):
in any way, could you do me a favor?
Share it with a friend, leavea review and hit the follow so you
don't miss what's next.
And if you want more tools andencouragement for your journey, head
over to leadwithjim.com you'llfind resources to help you grow as
a healthy, authentic Christianleader, entrepreneur and creator.

(15:37):
And until next time, rememberyour foundation is Christ, your calling
is unshakable and your lifecan make eternal impact.
This is the Unshakable Life Mindset.
Resilience Action no Strive.
Break free from the burnout.
Find your true north with yourguy Jim Burgoon stepping forward.

(16:07):
This is the Unshakable Life.