December 8, 2025 • 17 mins
Fresh out of the Big Brother Australia 2025 house, Connor relives the heartbreak of being evicted just one night before the finale. He explains why he believes Australia was torn between “cults of personality versus my cause.” How he knew Coco and Colin were huge public favourites thanks to names being shouted from the Dreamworld rollercoaster and what it felt like to step onto the stage knowing he’d tripped right at the end of the Big Brother marathon.
In this revealing chat, Connor opens up about the way Australia embraced his Tourette’s journey. He talks through the conversations he had with producers before entering the house, the debate around which words were censored and which weren’t and why some of the most confronting tics are actually rooted in his deepest fears around homophobia and transphobia.
Connor also explains why living with Tourette’s was, in many ways, easier inside the Big Brother house than in the real world. With time to sit down and explain his tics to housemates, he was able to break the cycle of anxiety and misunderstanding in a way he rarely can with strangers in day-to-day life.
Beyond Tourette’s and advocacy, we dive into his neurodivergence, his lack of a formal “game plan”, and why cooking became a nightly therapeutic ritual rather than strategy. Connor talks about being labelled the “smartest housemate,” how his curiosity and pattern recognition shaped his experience and why his direct communication style can sometimes be misread as self-righteousness.
Plus, he shares who he thinks deserves to win (and why he’s backing Emily), why he’d also be happy to see Colin take the crown, how his gameplay shifted once he relaxed into himself and what the 24/7 live stream did to the way housemates behaved on camera.
The episode ends with Connor reflecting on his earlier appearance on The Project, the responsibility he feels as an advocate and his belief that “someone’s got to do it and eventually you realise you’re someone.”
Timestamps & Key Takeaways
2:20 – The pre-finale heartbreak
Connor on being evicted the night before the finale, why he thinks the vote was “cults of personality versus my cause” and the strange mix of shock and relief he felt walking out.
3:30 – Australia embraces his Tourette’s
How public support has shifted his self-perception after years of feeling “two steps behind” when tics land badly in everyday life.
4:15 – Conversations with producers & censorship
What was discussed before he entered the house, his belief that censorship is never the answer and why he still understands TV has rules it has to follow.
5:10 – The ‘gay’ slur on air
Connor explains coprolalia, his deep fears around being seen as homophobic or transphobic, and why the things he says with Tourette’s are often the things he least wants to express.
6:10 – Big Brother vs real life with Tourette’s
Why living in the house was actually easier: having time to explain himself, reduce anxiety and break the misunderstanding loop with housemates.
7:30 – Neurodivergence & coping mechanisms
Ben and Connor compare their own neurodivergent experiences and how structure, familiarity and honest communication made the house more manageable than the outside world.
8:25 – No game plan, just cooking
Connor admits he came in as a fan with no strategy, why cooking nightly meals was therapy not gameplay and how his analytical brain naturally “Sunday-morning quarterbacks” situations
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's in the news today, but it was actually on
TV Reload the podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Last week Their Life Get.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
Everyone, Welcome back to TV Reload, And today it's a
little bit different because I'm dropping two episodes back to
back after last night's shock double eviction on Big Brother
Australia twenty twenty five. This episode of the podcast, I'm
joined by one of the most emotionally open, quietly strategic
and genuinely compelling housemates of this year, a man who's
eviction just a night before the finale shocked fans right
(00:28):
across the country. From the very beginning, Connor entered the
Big Brother house determined to be exactly who he is, thoughtful,
expressive and deeply human, and while Australia ultimately sent him
out just short of the finale, his journey has left
a lasting impression on viewers who connected with his vulnerability,
intelligence and emotional honesty. In this chat, you'll hear Connor
(00:50):
reflect on the bittersweet of viction, whether Australia may have
got it wrong, how it felt stepping onto the stage
knowing the finale was just one day away, and why
he believes the final vote came down to cult personality
versus cause. We also talk about the housemates beginning to
realize who the public was loving thanks to names being
yelled out on the Dream World rollercoaster, and what it
(01:11):
was like to slowly become aware of Coco and Colin's
serious momentum from the outside world. Importantly, Connor opens up
about his Tourette's journey, the conversations he had with producers
before entering the house, how it presented on camera, the
public reaction, and the complicated discussions about what language made
it to air and what didn't. He speaks honestly about
(01:33):
navigating those moments underneath the national spotlight, and how his
processed the response since leaving the house last night. Connor
is reflective, grounded, and incredibly self aware in this interview,
and this is probably one of the most important and
open conversations I've had with a housemate this season. So guys,
I would like to welcome Connor to the podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Good morning, bean, Hey, how are you? I'm doing well?
Thank you doing really well. I got out for a
walk this morning, saw some kangaroos, and I feel like
I'm alive again. I love this event in the real
world reality, not the Big Brother reality.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Well they're very different things. I can tell you and
I've experienced it. But Connor, I have to say you
were fantastic right from the start to finish.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
Thank you so much. Thank you. I went in intending
to be who I am and I didn't stop for
a second.
Speaker 1 (02:20):
Well, shockingly Australia have victed you just before the finale.
Does it feel like Australia might have got it wrong
at this stage?
Speaker 2 (02:26):
You know, I think Australia was kind of faced with
a difficult choice there. You know, I was very aware
of how popular Colin and Coco were and it really
was their cults of personality versus my cause, and I
think in that case it really was a throw of
the dice.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
But how do you know that? How did you know
that Australia was loving Coco and Colin? What gave you
that involved?
Speaker 2 (02:45):
We had a rollercoaster over our backyard and people would
be yelling their names all hours of the day.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
One thing viewers they really connected with how open you
were with your emotions. But you look genuinely disappointed to
be a victed What was that feeling like when you
got on and you know, were you coping like you did?
Seem like it was a bit of a shock to you.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Yeah, I was extremely disappointed. You know, I had said
multiple times to big Brother how much it would suck
to trip right at the end of the marathon that
big brother is and then it happened, And so I
was a little bit awestruck to start with. But the
second I stepped out of the house, it was just
a big sense of relief. To be honest with you,
it's difficult being in there and getting out and having
my family and getting to hear that the advocacy I
(03:27):
was doing was making the difference completely ease my tensions.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Well, I mean, the way that Australia embraced your Turet's
journey was actually quite moving, I found to watch from
the moment you went in. It could have been that
people saw your Turets as a little bit polarizing at times,
but that absolutely was not the case with viewers watching
this show. How does it feel to sort of receive
that level of support from the public.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
It feels amazing, you know. I always feel a little
bit of negativity towards myself because of my prior experiences
in public. You know, when you walk into a coffee shop,
when you swear at the barista you're starting two steps
behind everybody else, And so getting to see not only
my housemates, but now hearing how much Australia got behind
me has really kind of changed my perspective on it.
(04:11):
You know, I think I'm going to go forward with
a lot more positivity and a lot more self belief,
I guess.
Speaker 1 (04:15):
I mean, before entering the house, what sort of conversations
where you were able to have with producers about how
your Tourettes might present itself on camera.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Well, you know, I met them in person and as
my very very ticky self, and so I think they
went in kind of knowing exactly what they were getting
themselves into. Tourett's isn't always easy, but I think they
had a pretty good picture from meeting me in person
and having some good conversations about me.
Speaker 1 (04:38):
There were some public discussions about sort of what language
would or wouldn't be censored on screen. You know, from
your perspective, do you think any of it needed to
be censored, like the decision as to whether or not
you know, some words could be used in some words couldn't.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
My belief is that censorship is never the answer, but
I do also understand that, like, you know, it is
television and you have to follow the rules, you know,
and like the the station doesn't get to set those rules,
do they. And so I think I'm fine with it
as long as they're having to follow the rules and
they're not doing it of their own accord.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
One of the words that made it to air a
few times was the slur gay. I'm gay, And I
have to say to you, I'm not offended by it,
but is it hard to process knowing that, even when
it's not being used with malicious intents, some people watching
at home may still feel deeply offended by hearing that
on a broadcast.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
It can be you know. It's one of the big
things I'm kind of always championing championing is that Tourette's
often the things you're saying are the things you want
to say the least okay, you know. And so for me,
I have a younger brother that's trans and so for me,
you know, homophobia, misogyny and all those things are like
deep seated fears that I have. I don't ever want
people to think that of me, right, And so often
(05:48):
when I have coprolalia tics, that is what they're about.
They're about the things I don't want people to think.
They're about the things I don't want people to hear
coming out of my mouth. The housemate's got twenty eight
days of it, but this is my everyday.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
Interesting that you now get to sort of compare these
two things reality TV versus real life. How does living
with Tourett's in the real world compare to living with
Tourettes inside the Big Brother environment?
Speaker 2 (06:10):
I think, honestly, in the Big Brother environment it was
actually easier than it is in the real world.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (06:15):
You know, in the Big Brother environment, you know, when
I said something inappropriate or I did something that I
could see, you know, bothered people, I was able to
then sit and have a conversation with them and kind
of communicate the why and the how and how that
person can help me in the future, Whereas in my
real life. You know, when I walk into a coffee
shop and I say a curse word at the barista,
I can't then take that barista aside for forty five
(06:37):
minutes and explain to them why I just said something
horrible to them. And I don't have that same opportunity
in my day to day life. So I actually think
in a way it was easier in the Big Brother
House because I was able to have such kind of constant,
open communication with my housemates.
Speaker 1 (06:50):
It's interesting, I have my own neurodivergency which has not
really presented itself or being diagnosed until much later in
my life, and I did eighty seven days in the
Big Brother House. Confessed that I sleep eat, which actually
is a part of my neurodivergency as a part of
my anxiety, and I disclosed that. But they're never sleep
ate the whole way through the show. And I actually
(07:10):
think that the Big Brother experience was actually more manageable
because a large part of my anxiety that would trigger
things for me came down to my stress levels. But
with just knowing the same people, I don't know, I mean,
I don't have a medical diagnosis of this, but I
kind of felt like I was more comfortable within the
(07:31):
Big Brother House than I am in the real world.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Oh, one hundred percent. I can definitely empathize with that,
you know, I feel like that's how I felt as well.
You know, I wasn't having to encounter new people every
day and explain myself to them. I wasn't having to
kind of constantly deal with the consequences of having tourettes, because,
as you know, like halfway through the show, I kind
of came out to the house myself, like, you guys
have all been so open to me that my ticks
are now way better, because often ticks are exacerbated by
(07:55):
anxiety and when I don't know what people are thinking
and I don't know how they're reacting off, and that
can kind of start this cycle of anxiety and worry
that I wasn't having to experience in the house because
the housemates were all so genuine and loving about it.
Speaker 1 (08:08):
I love seeing how supportive some of the housemates were
of you, and that might not have been what you
expected going in, And I guess for you, I don't know.
I get the impression that you do a lot of
thinking before you do something. How much preparation did you
actually put in before entering the Big Brother House. I
think this was a big conversation on some of the forums.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
I would say, actually, I was not prepared for the
show at all. Oh wow, I'm just a fan, you
know what I mean. I was just watching and they
put them all up on YouTube and I was like,
hell yeah, I got hours to kill let's go, And
so I didn't really come in with a game plan
at all, you know. I saw Michael said that first
week he didn't know if my cooking was a game
plan or not, And for me, it wasn't at all.
(08:47):
I just really love cooking. I find it very therapeutic.
For me. It was a very like a calming exercise.
Was being able to be mindful of an evening and
take that time cooking everyone a beautiful meal. Wasn't gameplay
at all. It was just something I did for me.
I wasn't doing it, but then I was doing it
because I needed a way to process and deal with
the way that I was feeling in a way that
didn't involve me. Happen to put that weight on all
(09:08):
the other housemates. And then when it comes down to,
like you know, kind of someday more a quarterbacking the game.
I think that's just who I am as a person.
You know, Like I'm very analytical, and like I said,
I'm always looking for ways to grow, and I'm like
very pattern recognition. You know, I'm seeing certain patterns and
all of a sudden, my brain's going, hmm, I'm spotting this,
that's right. There. You know, I think the same thing
with like the way I identified like certain housemates traits
(09:30):
very very quickly. It's just a case of neurodiversity. You know.
It's like you grow these coping mechanisms and you don't
even realize you're doing them at times.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Absolutely, Oh my god, I relate to this so hard.
But you know, in relation to sort of this whole
thing now being that you were a fan of the
show and I've experienced it, comparing it to what your
expectations were, and now walking out, I mean, has this
whole experience surprised you in a way?
Speaker 2 (09:53):
Honestly, the show didn't surprise me at all. You know,
I knew it was going to be difficult. I knew
I was going to have to eat something gross at
some point. I knew I was going to be woken
up in the middle of the night. And then I
knew that something was probably going to happen in the
early days to really put us all on edge, and
they took all our clothes. I think what really surprised
me was how unprepared everyone else seen. You know, at
times it really felt like nobody had watched a single episode,
(10:17):
and that nobody knew what they were getting into when
they signed up.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Oh my god, I love that. I love that. It's
so funny. I have a very similar expectation of what
I had. I went into the show and I was like,
I thought everyone was a super fan and then they
vent in all these previous housemates for a challenge one day,
and not one housemate knew who any of these people were,
and I was like, what I was like, how underprepared
was everyone? You know?
Speaker 2 (10:39):
Come on, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
Well, we've got the finale today and there's a lot
of ground swell about Emily being the fan favorite to
take out this show, whilst Coco has been receiving sort
of a powerful single mother edit, which everyone's now talking
about online. In your opinion with who's left, who deserves
to win the show?
Speaker 2 (11:00):
Really agree with the fans. I think Emily deserves to win.
You know, she's been such a wonderful beacon of hope
the entire time. You know, she is as true to
herself I think as I am. You know, I think
the difference is I'm very outspoken and opinionated and Emily's
just very cool and chill most of the time. But
she was always wanted to come out with a cracking
quip when it was needed and always kind of be
(11:21):
that cool head when things started to get heated. So
I really do think that Emily deserves to take it home.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
She does in lots of ways, and I think in
some way I also agree with you and I think
that she should win. But don't you think someone noisy
like Colin might be also okay? Like, are you going
to be okay if Colin takes out the show? Oh?
Speaker 2 (11:39):
I'll be fine if Colin takes home the show, I think.
I don't know if it appeared much in the edit,
but like me and Colin actually had a fantastic relationship.
I think we bonded from the very first minute I
walked in. You know, I was ticking as I walked in,
and he did not bat an eye. He just instantly
walked in, tapped me up, and that was it. You know,
we shed a common humor of me. We were kind
(12:00):
of constantly throwing little meme lines back and forth at
each other. And so no, if Colin takes it, I
also won't be I won't be sad. You know, I
think he is another powerhouse personality.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
You know, I asked everyone this question, So this has
kind of remissied me not to ask it. But who
do you think was the smartest person in the house?
And feel free to say Connor because that's what everyone
else said.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Yeah, honestly, yeah, as like big head as it is
going to make me sound, I think it was me.
You know. I think everyone had their little niches. But
as far as like you know, analysis and like straight
knowing of facts, I think you would have to say me. Like,
I was kind of constantly getting into like pretty deep
conversations about black holes and the nature of the universe
(12:43):
and all sorts of stuff. And I could regularly see
housemates eyes just glaze over because they were like, I'm lost.
You got two sentences and I'm done.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
And I asked everyone coming out so far that's come
out so far, who's the smartest housemate? And they've every
single person said you, which is, you know, sort of crazy.
Where does your knowledge gent awareness come from?
Speaker 2 (13:01):
I'm just always looking to grow, and I'm always looking
to learn as a person, you know. I don't think
I'm ever complacent about thinking I know everything and that
I've got nowhere else to go. And I think that
there's like a curiosity in me. You know, anytime I
find out about something new, I want a deep dive.
I want to go as into it as I possibly can.
And I think that kind of maintaining that curiosity is
the key to knowledge.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
But do you think that people sometimes raid your directness
as a bit of maybe a ted's self righteous at times?
Speaker 2 (13:27):
Oh, one hundred percent. But I think that's just because
they're not used to people being so upfront and open.
You know, I think we as people are not not
necessarily me, but I think people in general, you know,
they're a little bit closed off. You know, they don't
always want everyone to know everything about them. They don't
always want to have all their opinions and their heart
on their sleeve. And that's just not who I am.
You know, you can ask any of my friends and
family like that is just who I am every single day.
(13:50):
You know, I want nice, clear, open communication, and sometimes
if people struggle with that, I think that's more on
them than it is on me.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
Yeah, I love a robust conversation, but I think that
again leans back into why I enjoyed your time on
the show. So you know that, hey, yeah, you know,
at one point you were a majority of Australia's pick
to win. There was a real popularity about you right
at the very start, and a lot of people said, oh,
he's going to win this show, and I'm not going
to watch this show because Connor's got this in the bag.
But then there was a tide that seemed to shift.
(14:17):
Do you feel that your gameplay changed at any point
as the weeks went on.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Yeah, but only in as much as I really struggled
that first week and a half. You know, I've got
so many coping mechanisms and strategies built into my real
world life that all of a sudden we was stripped
away from me and I didn't realize how much I
relied on them. And what I really think happened is
that in that kind of that second week, during the
Toilet Boys experience, that was the real me coming back
(14:44):
out again. You know, I found a way to vent
those frustrations. I went back to meditation, and I found
who I really am in the real world again. So
if anything, I think if my gameplay changed, it's just
because I stopped stressing. I went back to being who
I am a little bit more, having a little bit
more fun.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
Well, finally I asked people about it. Behind the scenes
question something from behind the scenes of Big Brother from
your experience, I just am so curious about looking in
at Big Brother at this point for you, and this
is the first time we've seen live Big Brother that
people can watch on a live stream. How nervous were
you about that kind of content and do you think
the housemates in there were particularly ultra or aware because
(15:22):
this is the first time we've had that in multiple seasons.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
I'm not sure. For me, I always knew the risk
going in. You know, this isn't my first time doing
media about Turette's and I'm always very aware about the
mean comments that come out of the woodwork and the
people who disagree with you know who I am and
what I stand for, So I always knew there was
going to be trouble there. And then in terms of
the rest of the housemates with the live stream, I
(15:48):
think if anything, it gave a lot of them a
reason to be more on all of the time. Okay,
you know, it wasn't as much a you know, I
don't think they were worried about it, but I do
think everyone knew people were watching, so they were kind
of always on always looking to be doing something. You know.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
I watched live that moment on the project with you
and your mum, with your siblings, and I just remember
that stayed in my mind. So when you were announced,
it took me to read about it online. Someone posted
the project clip of you talking about your Tourettes with
your family and I was like, oh my god, that's
I remember connecting to that story, you know, and thinking
(16:22):
it was so powerful. And I have to commend you
on being someone we haven't seen on Big Brother before,
having the confidence to come in and do this Connor like,
it's quite amazing, and I have to say thank you
so much for putting yourself out there and allowing to
share your story like this.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
Thank you, Thank you. That really does mean a lot
to me. You know, like I said, it was always
a gamble, taking the risk to do it. But you know,
I've lived my life about a you know, someone's got
to do it, someone's got to do it, and then
eventually you just realize that you're someone and you've got
to do it. And that's kind of been the revelation
of my life, you know, in that you know, if
I can take some hard knocks for the sake of,
(17:00):
you know, maybe a thousand children who then don't have
to take some of those knocks. I think it's worth it,
you know.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
I just think it's so amazing that you've done that,
and there's so many people out there supporting you. I
have to let you go because I'm well on truly
over time, but I just want to say thank you
so much for being so generous with your time talking
to me today. And you know, mate, I'm in your
audience to see where you take this.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Ah, thank you so much. Ben. I'd have to get
some social media's because I don't have any at the moment,
so we'll have to see where that goes.
Speaker 1 (17:23):
All of that are coming, mate, all of that's coming.
You just enjoy today, enjoy chatting to the media, have
this moment. You know, it's really exciting, beautiful.
Speaker 2 (17:30):
Thank you so much for your time, Ben.
Speaker 1 (17:32):
Cheers,
It's in the news today, but it was actually on
TV Reload the podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Last week Their Life Get.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
Everyone, Welcome back to TV Reload, And today it's a
little bit different because I'm dropping two episodes back to
back after last night's shock double eviction on Big Brother
Australia twenty twenty five. This episode of the podcast, I'm
joined by one of the most emotionally open, quietly strategic
and genuinely compelling housemates of this year, a man who's
eviction just a night before the finale shocked fans right
(00:28):
across the country. From the very beginning, Connor entered the
Big Brother house determined to be exactly who he is, thoughtful,
expressive and deeply human, and while Australia ultimately sent him
out just short of the finale, his journey has left
a lasting impression on viewers who connected with his vulnerability,
intelligence and emotional honesty. In this chat, you'll hear Connor
(00:50):
reflect on the bittersweet of viction, whether Australia may have
got it wrong, how it felt stepping onto the stage
knowing the finale was just one day away, and why
he believes the final vote came down to cult personality
versus cause. We also talk about the housemates beginning to
realize who the public was loving thanks to names being
yelled out on the Dream World rollercoaster, and what it
(01:11):
was like to slowly become aware of Coco and Colin's
serious momentum from the outside world. Importantly, Connor opens up
about his Tourette's journey, the conversations he had with producers
before entering the house, how it presented on camera, the
public reaction, and the complicated discussions about what language made
it to air and what didn't. He speaks honestly about
(01:33):
navigating those moments underneath the national spotlight, and how his
processed the response since leaving the house last night. Connor
is reflective, grounded, and incredibly self aware in this interview,
and this is probably one of the most important and
open conversations I've had with a housemate this season. So guys,
I would like to welcome Connor to the podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Good morning, bean, Hey, how are you? I'm doing well?
Thank you doing really well. I got out for a
walk this morning, saw some kangaroos, and I feel like
I'm alive again. I love this event in the real
world reality, not the Big Brother reality.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Well they're very different things. I can tell you and
I've experienced it. But Connor, I have to say you
were fantastic right from the start to finish.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
Thank you so much. Thank you. I went in intending
to be who I am and I didn't stop for
a second.
Speaker 1 (02:20):
Well, shockingly Australia have victed you just before the finale.
Does it feel like Australia might have got it wrong
at this stage?
Speaker 2 (02:26):
You know, I think Australia was kind of faced with
a difficult choice there. You know, I was very aware
of how popular Colin and Coco were and it really
was their cults of personality versus my cause, and I
think in that case it really was a throw of
the dice.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
But how do you know that? How did you know
that Australia was loving Coco and Colin? What gave you
that involved?
Speaker 2 (02:45):
We had a rollercoaster over our backyard and people would
be yelling their names all hours of the day.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
One thing viewers they really connected with how open you
were with your emotions. But you look genuinely disappointed to
be a victed What was that feeling like when you
got on and you know, were you coping like you did?
Seem like it was a bit of a shock to you.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Yeah, I was extremely disappointed. You know, I had said
multiple times to big Brother how much it would suck
to trip right at the end of the marathon that
big brother is and then it happened, And so I
was a little bit awestruck to start with. But the
second I stepped out of the house, it was just
a big sense of relief. To be honest with you,
it's difficult being in there and getting out and having
my family and getting to hear that the advocacy I
(03:27):
was doing was making the difference completely ease my tensions.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Well, I mean, the way that Australia embraced your Turet's
journey was actually quite moving, I found to watch from
the moment you went in. It could have been that
people saw your Turets as a little bit polarizing at times,
but that absolutely was not the case with viewers watching
this show. How does it feel to sort of receive
that level of support from the public.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
It feels amazing, you know. I always feel a little
bit of negativity towards myself because of my prior experiences
in public. You know, when you walk into a coffee shop,
when you swear at the barista you're starting two steps
behind everybody else, And so getting to see not only
my housemates, but now hearing how much Australia got behind
me has really kind of changed my perspective on it.
(04:11):
You know, I think I'm going to go forward with
a lot more positivity and a lot more self belief,
I guess.
Speaker 1 (04:15):
I mean, before entering the house, what sort of conversations
where you were able to have with producers about how
your Tourettes might present itself on camera.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Well, you know, I met them in person and as
my very very ticky self, and so I think they
went in kind of knowing exactly what they were getting
themselves into. Tourett's isn't always easy, but I think they
had a pretty good picture from meeting me in person
and having some good conversations about me.
Speaker 1 (04:38):
There were some public discussions about sort of what language
would or wouldn't be censored on screen. You know, from
your perspective, do you think any of it needed to
be censored, like the decision as to whether or not
you know, some words could be used in some words couldn't.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
My belief is that censorship is never the answer, but
I do also understand that, like, you know, it is
television and you have to follow the rules, you know,
and like the the station doesn't get to set those rules,
do they. And so I think I'm fine with it
as long as they're having to follow the rules and
they're not doing it of their own accord.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
One of the words that made it to air a
few times was the slur gay. I'm gay, And I
have to say to you, I'm not offended by it,
but is it hard to process knowing that, even when
it's not being used with malicious intents, some people watching
at home may still feel deeply offended by hearing that
on a broadcast.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
It can be you know. It's one of the big
things I'm kind of always championing championing is that Tourette's
often the things you're saying are the things you want
to say the least okay, you know. And so for me,
I have a younger brother that's trans and so for me,
you know, homophobia, misogyny and all those things are like
deep seated fears that I have. I don't ever want
people to think that of me, right, And so often
(05:48):
when I have coprolalia tics, that is what they're about.
They're about the things I don't want people to think.
They're about the things I don't want people to hear
coming out of my mouth. The housemate's got twenty eight
days of it, but this is my everyday.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
Interesting that you now get to sort of compare these
two things reality TV versus real life. How does living
with Tourett's in the real world compare to living with
Tourettes inside the Big Brother environment?
Speaker 2 (06:10):
I think, honestly, in the Big Brother environment it was
actually easier than it is in the real world.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (06:15):
You know, in the Big Brother environment, you know, when
I said something inappropriate or I did something that I
could see, you know, bothered people, I was able to
then sit and have a conversation with them and kind
of communicate the why and the how and how that
person can help me in the future, Whereas in my
real life. You know, when I walk into a coffee
shop and I say a curse word at the barista,
I can't then take that barista aside for forty five
(06:37):
minutes and explain to them why I just said something
horrible to them. And I don't have that same opportunity
in my day to day life. So I actually think
in a way it was easier in the Big Brother
House because I was able to have such kind of constant,
open communication with my housemates.
Speaker 1 (06:50):
It's interesting, I have my own neurodivergency which has not
really presented itself or being diagnosed until much later in
my life, and I did eighty seven days in the
Big Brother House. Confessed that I sleep eat, which actually
is a part of my neurodivergency as a part of
my anxiety, and I disclosed that. But they're never sleep
ate the whole way through the show. And I actually
(07:10):
think that the Big Brother experience was actually more manageable
because a large part of my anxiety that would trigger
things for me came down to my stress levels. But
with just knowing the same people, I don't know, I mean,
I don't have a medical diagnosis of this, but I
kind of felt like I was more comfortable within the
(07:31):
Big Brother House than I am in the real world.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Oh, one hundred percent. I can definitely empathize with that,
you know, I feel like that's how I felt as well.
You know, I wasn't having to encounter new people every
day and explain myself to them. I wasn't having to
kind of constantly deal with the consequences of having tourettes, because,
as you know, like halfway through the show, I kind
of came out to the house myself, like, you guys
have all been so open to me that my ticks
are now way better, because often ticks are exacerbated by
(07:55):
anxiety and when I don't know what people are thinking
and I don't know how they're reacting off, and that
can kind of start this cycle of anxiety and worry
that I wasn't having to experience in the house because
the housemates were all so genuine and loving about it.
Speaker 1 (08:08):
I love seeing how supportive some of the housemates were
of you, and that might not have been what you
expected going in, And I guess for you, I don't know.
I get the impression that you do a lot of
thinking before you do something. How much preparation did you
actually put in before entering the Big Brother House. I
think this was a big conversation on some of the forums.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
I would say, actually, I was not prepared for the
show at all. Oh wow, I'm just a fan, you
know what I mean. I was just watching and they
put them all up on YouTube and I was like,
hell yeah, I got hours to kill let's go, And
so I didn't really come in with a game plan
at all, you know. I saw Michael said that first
week he didn't know if my cooking was a game
plan or not, And for me, it wasn't at all.
(08:47):
I just really love cooking. I find it very therapeutic.
For me. It was a very like a calming exercise.
Was being able to be mindful of an evening and
take that time cooking everyone a beautiful meal. Wasn't gameplay
at all. It was just something I did for me.
I wasn't doing it, but then I was doing it
because I needed a way to process and deal with
the way that I was feeling in a way that
didn't involve me. Happen to put that weight on all
(09:08):
the other housemates. And then when it comes down to,
like you know, kind of someday more a quarterbacking the game.
I think that's just who I am as a person.
You know, Like I'm very analytical, and like I said,
I'm always looking for ways to grow, and I'm like
very pattern recognition. You know, I'm seeing certain patterns and
all of a sudden, my brain's going, hmm, I'm spotting this,
that's right. There. You know, I think the same thing
with like the way I identified like certain housemates traits
(09:30):
very very quickly. It's just a case of neurodiversity. You know.
It's like you grow these coping mechanisms and you don't
even realize you're doing them at times.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Absolutely, Oh my god, I relate to this so hard.
But you know, in relation to sort of this whole
thing now being that you were a fan of the
show and I've experienced it, comparing it to what your
expectations were, and now walking out, I mean, has this
whole experience surprised you in a way?
Speaker 2 (09:53):
Honestly, the show didn't surprise me at all. You know,
I knew it was going to be difficult. I knew
I was going to have to eat something gross at
some point. I knew I was going to be woken
up in the middle of the night. And then I
knew that something was probably going to happen in the
early days to really put us all on edge, and
they took all our clothes. I think what really surprised
me was how unprepared everyone else seen. You know, at
times it really felt like nobody had watched a single episode,
(10:17):
and that nobody knew what they were getting into when
they signed up.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Oh my god, I love that. I love that. It's
so funny. I have a very similar expectation of what
I had. I went into the show and I was like,
I thought everyone was a super fan and then they
vent in all these previous housemates for a challenge one day,
and not one housemate knew who any of these people were,
and I was like, what I was like, how underprepared
was everyone? You know?
Speaker 2 (10:39):
Come on, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
Well, we've got the finale today and there's a lot
of ground swell about Emily being the fan favorite to
take out this show, whilst Coco has been receiving sort
of a powerful single mother edit, which everyone's now talking
about online. In your opinion with who's left, who deserves
to win the show?
Speaker 2 (11:00):
Really agree with the fans. I think Emily deserves to win.
You know, she's been such a wonderful beacon of hope
the entire time. You know, she is as true to
herself I think as I am. You know, I think
the difference is I'm very outspoken and opinionated and Emily's
just very cool and chill most of the time. But
she was always wanted to come out with a cracking
quip when it was needed and always kind of be
(11:21):
that cool head when things started to get heated. So
I really do think that Emily deserves to take it home.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
She does in lots of ways, and I think in
some way I also agree with you and I think
that she should win. But don't you think someone noisy
like Colin might be also okay? Like, are you going
to be okay if Colin takes out the show? Oh?
Speaker 2 (11:39):
I'll be fine if Colin takes home the show, I think.
I don't know if it appeared much in the edit,
but like me and Colin actually had a fantastic relationship.
I think we bonded from the very first minute I
walked in. You know, I was ticking as I walked in,
and he did not bat an eye. He just instantly
walked in, tapped me up, and that was it. You know,
we shed a common humor of me. We were kind
(12:00):
of constantly throwing little meme lines back and forth at
each other. And so no, if Colin takes it, I
also won't be I won't be sad. You know, I
think he is another powerhouse personality.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
You know, I asked everyone this question, So this has
kind of remissied me not to ask it. But who
do you think was the smartest person in the house?
And feel free to say Connor because that's what everyone
else said.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Yeah, honestly, yeah, as like big head as it is
going to make me sound, I think it was me.
You know. I think everyone had their little niches. But
as far as like you know, analysis and like straight
knowing of facts, I think you would have to say me. Like,
I was kind of constantly getting into like pretty deep
conversations about black holes and the nature of the universe
(12:43):
and all sorts of stuff. And I could regularly see
housemates eyes just glaze over because they were like, I'm lost.
You got two sentences and I'm done.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
And I asked everyone coming out so far that's come
out so far, who's the smartest housemate? And they've every
single person said you, which is, you know, sort of crazy.
Where does your knowledge gent awareness come from?
Speaker 2 (13:01):
I'm just always looking to grow, and I'm always looking
to learn as a person, you know. I don't think
I'm ever complacent about thinking I know everything and that
I've got nowhere else to go. And I think that
there's like a curiosity in me. You know, anytime I
find out about something new, I want a deep dive.
I want to go as into it as I possibly can.
And I think that kind of maintaining that curiosity is
the key to knowledge.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
But do you think that people sometimes raid your directness
as a bit of maybe a ted's self righteous at times?
Speaker 2 (13:27):
Oh, one hundred percent. But I think that's just because
they're not used to people being so upfront and open.
You know, I think we as people are not not
necessarily me, but I think people in general, you know,
they're a little bit closed off. You know, they don't
always want everyone to know everything about them. They don't
always want to have all their opinions and their heart
on their sleeve. And that's just not who I am.
You know, you can ask any of my friends and
family like that is just who I am every single day.
(13:50):
You know, I want nice, clear, open communication, and sometimes
if people struggle with that, I think that's more on
them than it is on me.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
Yeah, I love a robust conversation, but I think that
again leans back into why I enjoyed your time on
the show. So you know that, hey, yeah, you know,
at one point you were a majority of Australia's pick
to win. There was a real popularity about you right
at the very start, and a lot of people said, oh,
he's going to win this show, and I'm not going
to watch this show because Connor's got this in the bag.
But then there was a tide that seemed to shift.
(14:17):
Do you feel that your gameplay changed at any point
as the weeks went on.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Yeah, but only in as much as I really struggled
that first week and a half. You know, I've got
so many coping mechanisms and strategies built into my real
world life that all of a sudden we was stripped
away from me and I didn't realize how much I
relied on them. And what I really think happened is
that in that kind of that second week, during the
Toilet Boys experience, that was the real me coming back
(14:44):
out again. You know, I found a way to vent
those frustrations. I went back to meditation, and I found
who I really am in the real world again. So
if anything, I think if my gameplay changed, it's just
because I stopped stressing. I went back to being who
I am a little bit more, having a little bit
more fun.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
Well, finally I asked people about it. Behind the scenes
question something from behind the scenes of Big Brother from
your experience, I just am so curious about looking in
at Big Brother at this point for you, and this
is the first time we've seen live Big Brother that
people can watch on a live stream. How nervous were
you about that kind of content and do you think
the housemates in there were particularly ultra or aware because
(15:22):
this is the first time we've had that in multiple seasons.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
I'm not sure. For me, I always knew the risk
going in. You know, this isn't my first time doing
media about Turette's and I'm always very aware about the
mean comments that come out of the woodwork and the
people who disagree with you know who I am and
what I stand for, So I always knew there was
going to be trouble there. And then in terms of
the rest of the housemates with the live stream, I
(15:48):
think if anything, it gave a lot of them a
reason to be more on all of the time. Okay,
you know, it wasn't as much a you know, I
don't think they were worried about it, but I do
think everyone knew people were watching, so they were kind
of always on always looking to be doing something. You know.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
I watched live that moment on the project with you
and your mum, with your siblings, and I just remember
that stayed in my mind. So when you were announced,
it took me to read about it online. Someone posted
the project clip of you talking about your Tourettes with
your family and I was like, oh my god, that's
I remember connecting to that story, you know, and thinking
(16:22):
it was so powerful. And I have to commend you
on being someone we haven't seen on Big Brother before,
having the confidence to come in and do this Connor like,
it's quite amazing, and I have to say thank you
so much for putting yourself out there and allowing to
share your story like this.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
Thank you, Thank you. That really does mean a lot
to me. You know, like I said, it was always
a gamble, taking the risk to do it. But you know,
I've lived my life about a you know, someone's got
to do it, someone's got to do it, and then
eventually you just realize that you're someone and you've got
to do it. And that's kind of been the revelation
of my life, you know, in that you know, if
I can take some hard knocks for the sake of,
(17:00):
you know, maybe a thousand children who then don't have
to take some of those knocks. I think it's worth it,
you know.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
I just think it's so amazing that you've done that,
and there's so many people out there supporting you. I
have to let you go because I'm well on truly
over time, but I just want to say thank you
so much for being so generous with your time talking
to me today. And you know, mate, I'm in your
audience to see where you take this.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Ah, thank you so much. Ben. I'd have to get
some social media's because I don't have any at the moment,
so we'll have to see where that goes.
Speaker 1 (17:23):
All of that are coming, mate, all of that's coming.
You just enjoy today, enjoy chatting to the media, have
this moment. You know, it's really exciting, beautiful.
Speaker 2 (17:30):
Thank you so much for your time, Ben.
Speaker 1 (17:32):
Cheers,
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