Bruce Feldman on the fun and challenges of coaching pee wee football

Greg sits down with Bruce Feldman, National College Football Insider for The Athletic. The pair discuss coaching his sons’ pee wee football team (16:06), implementing the “slow mesh” (26:56), and preparing kids for high pressure situations (37:58).

Greg also answers listener questions (52:10).

Rate, review, subscribe and submit your questions on social @YouthInc.

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
And my wife is listening this you know, and she's like I can't

(00:03):
get him to flush the toilet. Why are you letting him do?
That's so true. And because it matters so true.
What's up everybody welcome backto another episode here on.
You think presented by Audio Rama and our friends at body
armor, lot going on full fall schedule is in effect.

(00:23):
I know I've talked to you guys the last couple weeks we got a
little soccer. We got baseball.
We got a lot of football, tacklefootball.
I'll tell you I wasn't sure whatto expect going into my first
first season coaching tackle football with my oldest son and
you know, we started to seize him, we lost One, we were still
had a lot of kids who had never really played before, but I'll

(00:45):
tell you, these last four or five weeks, the progress that
these kids have made, the work that they've put in.
It's been as fun, a sports season thus far as we've had.
And, and that's been really coolfor a bunch of kids who've never
played before, you know, young, a lot of them are only 10.
It's been, it's been a really cool season, thus, far as we got

(01:07):
one more regular season game this upcoming Saturday,
hopefully, this storm Coming to the east coast, doesn't rain us
out. And then next week, first week
of October starts to play off. So we are interested to see what
that's all about. We've never done that before and
but we're rolling right now. We had a huge win this past
weekend against another undefeated team who was really

(01:30):
good. Had some really big good
athletes but we were able to squeak it out.
Kids are buying in parents, or buying in.
It's been, it's been a good. It's been a good experience.
Thus far. So I'll keep you as the
playoffs. Kind of approach.
I'll keep you guys updated on how we're doing, but yeah, all
is good in the the Olson house with sports its ups and downs

(01:52):
but we're we're enjoying it. Today's guest is Bruce Feldman,
Bruce has a New York Times bestselling author.
He's covered college football for over two decades.
He's now the national college football Insider for the
athletic. And he's also a sideline
reporter for Fox with their college football programs and
and slate of games. So a colleague of mine.

(02:13):
I was able to join us, not only to talk college football, kind
of the landscape where he sees the NCAA, you know, evolving
college football. Playoff, some of the upsets
we've seen thus far, early, but also, he joined us as a dad.
He wrote a really cool piece that came across my desk.
Probably a month or so ago abouthis experience, coaching his

(02:35):
kids flag football team and he wrote a whole piece in the
athletic about just, what an experience it was and what he
learned and how it was the best season of his life.
So I I called him up and I said,hey, you know, I would love to
have you come on and talk college football and you know,
ni L and the expansion of the college playoffs.
But I'd also love you, just comeout as a dad and just talk
about, you know, Youth Sports inthe journey, you're on with your

(02:56):
kids, similar to me and similar to a lot of you that are out
there. Listening, so Bruce was awesome.
This was a great conversation, amix of personal, but also a mix
of little update on the college football landscape, obviously,
as the Falls kind of, revving uphere, and to pretty deep.
Now into the calendar and the false late.
Great conversation. Thank you.
As always to our sponsor body armor, body armor.

(03:17):
Not only fuels this show, but they also fuel all of our youth
sports teams that we work with. There's a lot of choices for the
sidelines sports drinks. But my favorite the, my kids
favorite. The, when we go to gas stations
or we go to the grocery store, they always ask Mom, Dad, can we
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We love the orange mango. We love the strawberry banana.
We always have. It's a staple in our house.

(03:39):
It's a staple in our youth sports craziness.
This body armor is made with coconut water B vitamins.
No artificial sweeteners and youcan go to drink body armor.com
for more information. So now please enjoy this
conversation with Bruce Feldman.First, thank you so much for

(04:00):
joining us here on, you think? Thanks for having me.
Big fan of big fan of your show on here.
It's been a great resource for me.
Well, I appreciate. Well, I'll tell you so I
followed you for years on Twitter and you know, I've read
your articles, you know, the articles that appertained, you
know, schools that I like or follow her interesting stories
and change in NCAA Landscapes and all the big hot-button

(04:23):
stories that you follow. So closely now in your current
position. But the story that I came across
that caused me to actually D mu and And share and share on
Twitter was when you meant, you wrote a whole piece about the
experience, you had coaching your son's football team and
just the experience that it was like, and what a life-changing

(04:46):
experience that it was, and thatwas really the inspiration for
having you on here today. So, before we jump into that,
though, there is one, there is acollege football story that I
came across this week that you also wrote that we're going to
touch on First and it blew my mind, right?
I mean, I want to talk to you about coaching young kids and
the innocence of young sports, but the current landscape of

(05:07):
college football has gotten so crazy and you rotate you wrote
an article you shared on Twitterthat I actually re-shared
because I couldn't believe it. I don't know if anyone's ever
heard of ta Cunningham, it was aGeorgia top prospect defensive
lineman family. His dad sends him out is that
dad's name is Big, rev sends himto California thinking he's

(05:27):
gonna get n IL deals. He's now an eligible the agent
he signed with has been arrestedlike I need to talk to you about
this story because it seems likeat it, it seems out of a movie.
It does. And honestly, so so much has
changed. There's always been kind of
under-the-table payments of top recruits.
But what's different now is because of an IL and it coming

(05:49):
into into reality basically in the last, you know, 14, 15
months. And I think a lot of us myself
included, think it's a really good thing, but because of it,
it's because the laws depending on which state California.
Is much more open in terms of, you know, high school players,
have a lot more resources available to them, than in his

(06:11):
case and Tas case the state of Georgia.
He is a high school recruit who's actually a junior.
So he's on the 2024 class was a five-star kid.
Georgia, first offered him when he was a freshman.
I mean, this kid has been on a lot of schools Radars and I use
the term kid. He just turned 17, but still
really young. And so, you know, in this, This

(06:33):
story. What you have is a lot of
people, unless you follow recruiting very closely, you
probably don't aren't familiar with some of the names.
We're in the middle of this space.
Mike SP know who's an attorney out here in Southern California.
Who did a deal? A huge deal.
Well, into the Millions for a quarterback here, High School
quarterback in Southern, California, who is eventually

(06:54):
going to go to Tennessee. But because of that, you know,
he hope that was setting the market and to be truthful over
that time since that deal happen.
It's really been kind of an outlier, but there's been other
deals that have been done. And this case big RAV according
to the text messages that he hadsent.
And this is his attorney, by theway, who did this deal and who

(07:16):
is now suing the CIF, which is basically who, you know, the
board that oversees High School sports in the state of
California? It's a crazy story and the kid,
and his younger brother. TK, who's a big 8th grader?
They are out here. Here in Southern California and
they found their living with distant relative but they've

(07:38):
been in limbo for a law for a couple of months now, and he is
ineligible. And it's just a story that it's
the first one that's gone into the courts, but expect a lot
more because there's just so much murkiness into this, like
the margins around, the ni l space now.
And, as you mentioned for anyone, we did it in il episode

(08:00):
here, weeks back. And I think One who doesn't
follow it closely. They don't truly understand.
It is a state-by-state process, right?
The states at the schools, in the state of California, the
schools in the state of Texas versus Florida, Georgia, all
these different Powerhouse, HighSchool football, you know,
destinations they are all operating under different rules.

(08:22):
There was the famous case of Quinn yours.
Now, the starting quarterback atTexas, who actually reclassed to
leave his high school early in the state of Texas, because he
was not able to collect the the Courts in Texas said we are not
going to allow our high school athletes to participate in Ni L.
He actually reclassed enrolled early in Ohio State ended up
leaving coming back. Now, he's at the University of

(08:44):
Texas. So, I mean, we've seen this play
out and because of the differentlandscapes in the different
states, it creates situations like this.
But I guess my question. My next question is, as you as
usual, the adults are what ruin it.
Right. This, these were these were
rules. These are new policies, put into
place where the NCAA said, I'm stepping back.
I want nothing to do with it. You It's handle it and it was

(09:05):
the idea behind it was to help the kids.
It was the help the student athletes.
It was to help them create some money off, the usage of their
name. Their image in our likeness and
allow them to participate in therevenues that were being made
off their back. But as usual the system gets
taken advantage of by adults looking to make a quick buck.
And this case there's a parent involved, there's an agent
involved, there's California Athletic Association, but at the

(09:28):
core of it, there's a young kid,a 17 year old kid who now loses
Is junior year in high school. So like how do we manage this
current climate and keep in mindthat it's the kids who were
trying to benefit. And now in this case, not only
is he not benefiting his junior year of high school experience
has been taken away from him. Yeah.

(09:49):
I think they're tricky. Part is I talked to him,
probably it was like three days before he turned 17.
I was also a, you know, a coupleof days before the CIF had
denied his appeal. They thought he was optimistic
Sticky and his high school coach.
We're optimistic that he was going to get cleared.
You know he is a bright kid, he has over 3.0 GPA very

(10:14):
well-spoken enjoyed talking to him.
When you talk to people college coaches who have, you know, met
with him. The one thing they'll say is
he's very, very naive and doesn't really know what's going
on around them and and what I think what they mean by that is
what this whole murky process isthat's going on around him.
Now look I mean you You know, I know your dad was a really

(10:34):
successful big-time High School coach in New Jersey, but like
that put yourself in his shoes of being 17 years old, not a CO,
you know, he by the way, the he's now on his third school, he
went to a different School in Georgia, as a freshman, a
different one, as a sophomore. And then now he's at La Salle in
Southern California. So this kid has been, you know,
kind of traveled around but likewhy would he be able to, you

(10:57):
know, of course, he's going to be naive because a lot of this
stuff you know, unless you've been like Really versed in to
how this process is and studying, you know, all this
other stuff, you know, you probably would be in the dark.
I mean, it's hard to be worldly in this space just because as
you said, it comes out of a movie.
But it's but it's a lot of things that I think are to put

(11:18):
on a kids plate. And again, the last line of the
story is, you know, people forget because he's so massive
that he is just a kid and he's almost 67 275 pounds but at the
end of the day we're talking about a High School junior?
I don't know how many kids at that age.
Agent High School, whether they're great athletes are not
even if they, you know, even if he had a background, where his
dad was a high school coach and,you know, he grew up in it.

(11:42):
I still find it hard to believe that they that he would have the
wherewithal, no matter how good of a student he is to kind of
comprehend everything that is going on around him.
Yeah. Couple months back, we had
Malachi Nelson, the one of the top quarterbacks in next year's
class. So the class of 2012 Fork.
Same climate is by the way. Yeah, in high school team.
Exactly. So we had Malachi and his There

(12:03):
and it hearing you just described in reading the article
the other day. And then now having you on and
kind of describe it, just talking to Malachi and his
father. They've been really educated in
it. They have attorney.
They have, you know, he has really strong parents and a
family who really understands, you know, these are the
opportunities that we want to take and and allow for our son.
But there's also some opportunities.

(12:24):
We're going to shy away from to make sure we always keep it
about ball. We always keep it about what's
in the best interest of Malachi.And I came away from that
conversation just really impressed by how How that family
was handling this changing landscape of n.
IL now at the high school level living in California and
understandably. So taking advantage of it, but
at the same time not letting it ruin his high school experience.

(12:46):
And now we see the complete other side of the coin where
families who might be to your point.
They're not as well equipped or not as educated in the process
and they think any move as such as just moving California it
opens up all these doors and in now in reality the doors have
been closed in his face. Is there an opportunity that
That this kit that ta will get his junior year back, is the

(13:07):
hope that at the very least, he'll have his senior year.
Like, what is what's the best-case scenario?
Now at this thing, comes to a close.
The best case, there is at some point, the CIF looks at it and
says hey you know what, this is no fault of the kids were going
to clear him. I don't that feels like an
uphill battle because a lot of the information that is attorney

(13:29):
put out seems to be contradictory to The case that
it wasn't for n IL purposes. It wasn't for athletic purposes.
Right? And so, you know, I had a bunch
of people say, well, why doesn'the just move back to Georgia,
you know, and it's a lot of the toothpaste is out of the tube
here. You know, I hope for his sake

(13:51):
that, you know, the people, I'vetalked to around La Salle.
I feel like to have his best interests at heart.
I hope he can get on the field just because, you know, for To
be able to practice him to go toschool.
But again, you know, the scholarships aren't going to go
away, right? He's got the scholarship offers
like he's gonna have opportunitybut you just would like the kid

(14:12):
to have as much sense of normalcy as he can, you know, in
this and, you know, I feel for him and, you know, hopefully
that he will get cleared. And if he doesn't, hopefully,
I'll end up in a place where where some of this entanglement
and will go away, because you wonder if he was at a private
school, would this have been thehurdle for him and you know,
there's plenty of, you know, Modern-day Saint John Bosco,

(14:34):
there's plenty of really big time.
Southern California, private schools, you know, would he have
been in this kind of situation if it had gone that route as
opposed to this? I don't know, it depends on who
you talk to because there's a lot of people who feel like how
this has been handled has been very political and in nature as
well. Yeah I just I just hope at the
end of the day, the search for the quick Buck from the father

(14:58):
from the agents from the entire team of adults around him, kind
of driving, you know, you The college's think he's naive.
He should be naive. He's a 16 17 year old kid who
just wants to play high school football in the adults around
him. See him as a paycheck, they see
him as an opportunity to make a quick buck and they uproot his
life from everything he knows. And I just hope when the story

(15:18):
comes out, unfortunately, we've seen so many of these stories,
and I hope this is the exceptionto the rule.
But it just, it just seems, as you said, an uphill battle to
get things back on track. That.
Not only does he have a great College High School experience
that he does. Get an opportunity to go to one
of these great schools and just get his career back on track and
have an opportunity to make something of the opportunity.

(15:39):
That's my hope. I know that your hope but I was
fascinated reading that article when it came out a couple days
ago because it's just it's the dark side of what people are
hesitant that this that we're creating now with these new
policies and guidelines. So we'll see how it plays out.
But now for the real point of this conversation.
So I reached out to you on, on Twitter.

(16:02):
God probably a Or two ago and I came across and I felt like when
I was reading your article, you were like speaking for me,
right? Coaching your kids, the anxiety
laying up at night, stressing over plays and playtime and, you
know, trying to get your kids ready.
I always joke like the hardest part of coaching young kids is
you take all of their success and failures, personally?

(16:23):
Right? When they fail your you feel
like you failed them and you letthem down.
Like, at least, that's how I approach it.
So, take me back into that. Like, was that your that I know
that was your first time? Really coaching your kids team
in a full-time capacity, just for our viewer.
Just give everyone bring them upto speed on.
Just what influence you to writethat article and why that
experience made such an impact on you.

(16:44):
Well, first of all, I like I've written tons of stories, as you
said for years. This is the most personal thing
I've ever written, right? And it was, it was just a kind
of a wild experience and very surreal for me because I did not
want to to be a head coach just because there was a lot of
responsibilities and time that factored into it.
Lot of logistical stuff that I was like, I don't know if I want

(17:05):
to, I don't want to deal with this.
And I my son was going to be on somebody else's team and then we
got a note from the commissionerof the league saying, we need
two more coaches or else, we're gonna have to cut 20 players
from the program. And so I was like, all right, I
have the time. It's the offseason, I mean,
Spring football, I can do this. So I did one through the draft

(17:28):
process, which was a little bizarre or very bizarre came out
of that. And kind of wait till I stop, I
don't want to, I don't interruptinterrupt you but tell me I'm
coaching my kids popcorn or teamright now.
There was no draft. We just got like whoever was on
our roster. So tell me about the draft like
are you really evaluating these kids and trying to like do a
true draft? Like what was that?

(17:50):
So I wasn't I wasn't at the combine.
So what we got was basically a spreadsheet with I guess he's
about 80 names and it lists height weight there, 30 yard
dash time. How far they Throw a football in
yards. Right?
And so is, and now how look at these kids these kids are seven
and eight, okay? I just want to paint the picture

(18:12):
for our viewer here. Yeah, it's a, it's a crazy
picture. Let's be honest.
So I go into this draft and I don't know, any of these kids
were playing. We're playing in a different
League which is like 20, 20 minutes from where we live.
So I maybe I know like four of the names.
I mean, I don't know the kids but I know a couple of names
then the one kid I did know in the league because our son does
karate with him. He was on the team who was

(18:32):
initially, Going to be on. And so I go through this list
and I basically forward the spreadsheet to a parent buddy of
mine. Whose son is a really good
baseball player, knows recognizesome other kids that his son
played baseball with and he said, you know, I don't know if
these kids are going to be good football players, but I know
they're good. Really good, baseball players.
So, I put those kids on my list as well.
We sit down for the draft, and there's another dad in there,

(18:54):
and he basically rattles off. Like, each kid has a number,
it's like 100 to 105. He rattles off, he takes all the
good baseball players. I was like, okay, so now my list
You know, my scouting list goes from like 2:47.
I end up with one kid on my list, who I'd remembered from
other league. I didn't know him, but I knew he
was a good player and then the rest of it was just a you know,

(19:15):
who looks like they're fast and big.
And so, my first round pick was a kid, who was like the third
heaviest, kid in the league, andmaybe the seventh or eighth
fastest, and then they were like, well, he's got a, he's got
a brother, you got to take him home, like, okay, he was a twin
now, here and considerably slower, but I'm like.
Alright, so now I got two and then it kind of went from there.
R, as I'm driving home, I'm sitting there thinking about it.

(19:36):
My son did not go through the combine process, but I know he's
a shorter kid but he's, he's he's pretty fast.
So I'm thinking well, this kid the my first round pick ran
about the same time as my son isabout the same height but is 40
pounds heavier. How's the uh know about this?
Maybe I'm getting some bad information and so it was like

(19:59):
maybe I got a dawn Tha repo here.
I don't know the first Day of practice my, you know, the Two
Brothers come out and I realize they're not twins the.
My first round pick is actually a kindergartener, but his older
brothers with us. I think it was a typo on the 42
on the 30 yard dash time, you know because when we ran it was
like, okay, so after the first practice I came back thinking my

(20:23):
I just hope we're in bad shape. My son's running circles around
a lot of these kids and I hope that our team's not so bad that
he comes away. Not Loving football anymore
because he loves it. And I just don't, I've heard
from parents the experience withfootball.
Especially if they have a reallybad experience with coaching or
with a team, it can really kind of unplug them and just feel

(20:46):
like they don't love it as much,you know.
And and that worried me because it's he loves this sport more
than you know he's the kid who watches film and is obsessed
with it so you know, like we went through it and I ended up
reaching out to a to a dad who Iknew here.
Signage they just moved here. I knew he was a pretty good
athlete. We were able to add him to the

(21:08):
team. So I knew I felt like we had
like three players of the you know that we had and then at
from that point on it really became a case of okay.
What am I going to do? Like what do I feel like I need
to hammer home as we start to dothis thing, and to me, the
biggest things were just from having seen youth football.
And some of the kids is, we're going to wrap the heck out of

(21:29):
just a couple plays because I want them to get good at that.
I don't want the kids, Standing around, I want to teach the, you
know, I want to talk to them a lot about spacing, I'm not
worried about, hey, we're going to win, we're going to lose.
I just think I kept on saying is, I just want us to be the
most improved team and I kind ofstress that and as you know from
I'm curious from, you know, fromyour own experience, not just

(21:49):
with your background but coaching youth football.
Like I'm trying to kid a Phi as I would put it some certain play
Concepts that I think might givepeople problems.
What I was just trying to do is,how are we going to get kids
open in space? Can we do.
And from there, we just practicethe lot, you know, it was like
our I was lucky our kids, we didnot have kids who goofed around

(22:11):
and we did not have parents who you know and my son's first team
a color like two years ago some of the parents I think war on
the head coach and it became he was trying to please 13 parents
and he didn't please any of themand I felt for him because he's
a really nice guy and he just got kind of pushed in a
different direction. I became like I was going to

(22:32):
say, No to certain things. I was like, Hey we're not gonna
have you play quarterback but I promise I'm we're going to give
you you know you're going to getto touch the ball and I promise
you know this and that became like the focus and I was lucky
because like I said we had really good families and the
kids you know just bought in andwe didn't waste time and it was
fun and we got a little momentumand I thought we were going to

(22:53):
lose every game. And then we won the first game
in spite of my coaching and all of a sudden then it just kind of
built. It's so funny to hear you say
that because the first order of business, in my opinion of being
a good youth, coach is there's abig difference between knowing
your sport and knowing your sport at the Youth Level, right?

(23:16):
Like, for example, I used to coach my kids baseball team a
lot, and I don't have a great baseball background.
I don't have, I never played it at a high level.
I mean, I know it enough to be dangerous for the kids in middle
school and whatnot. Nothing beyond that.
But I really learned and studiedyouth baseball, right, what?

(23:36):
Okay, maybe the major leagues, do their Cuts like this, but
maybe for 10 year olds, it worksa little better like this or
baserunning, you know? So you kind of morph and modify
the game to the age group that you're coaching.
So, right now my dad myself and Luke Kuechly, and a couple other
Dad's here in town or coaching my son's 11, you tackle football

(23:58):
team. So we got like 20 He 24 kids so
we got a decent amount of kids and you got to play them all and
all that. So we have all these great
ideas, right? Like, you know, we know the best
fronts, we know what gives teamstroubles, but like you said, the
enjoy the key to the operation is it doesn't matter what we
know. It's what can we get the kids to

(24:19):
know and that to me is the joy of the Youth Sports Experience.
It's the countless hours. The time sitting on the couch
last night. We're watching the Monday night
game last night. My wife said, what are you
doing? I was watching film off of a
cell phone of the team. We're going to play this weekend
and charting all their front so that we make sure tonight at
practice, we know what fronts topractice blocking against like,

(24:43):
Now when we go to practice, we can give the kids, the tools to
succeed. So like to hear you say that,
and again, when I read the article, it brought back so many
like memories of doing this because I don't know if people
realize the amount of time youthcoaches spend away from
practice, making sure that theirtime at practice is maximized

(25:03):
the part that gets me is, I can't tell you how many bad
nights of sleep. I've gotten a frustration of
something that whether it workedor not, like we Other league,
they do film it. We're not, we got to miss
League. They weren't going to do it.
And so I asked the my assistant coach said, do you have a?
Do you have like a camcorder? He we were filming games and for

(25:26):
two reasons one, it's great whenlike a kid who maybe doesn't do,
you know, like any kid, right? Actually on our team, the family
will have those videos of their highlights forever.
The other thing was and this wasbig, you know, my son loved to
watch film. And we would sit there and I
would say, why do you think thisworked or whatever?

(25:47):
We've had a game in our summer season, we ended up playing the
team. Basically kind of played again
in the summer and there was a team we played.
And to be honest sometimes if you don't know what the other
kids, something a lot of all thekids kind of look the same to an
adult, they do it sometimes. And so I saw there was a kid who
was maybe the fastest kid on oneof these other team was a pretty
good team. We played in the playoffs and he

(26:09):
was like, that's so insolvent and he goes well when they line
up, But Center, they leak him out.
I said good. All right.
I didn't know that was him, but now and you'd see it.
Whether it was in like, Nelson, he's got like an investment in
this, right? We're talking about.
All right, so do you want to call something when someone so
lot is in there at Center because, you know what, they're

(26:29):
going to do, they're either going to leak them out to the
left or the LIE come out to the right.
You know, we're there and so we talked about it and he was like,
you know, gave them words. He was like I'll call Bandit and
if they do this and I was like and I my wife is listen to this,
you know, and She's like, we can't get him to flush the
toilet. Why are you letting him do?
That's so true. And because it matters so to the

(26:51):
stuff that we cannot like our sun.
So I, this is in the story. We just mean monkeyed around
with the slow mesh, which Wake Forest runs.
And the reason why I thought it might work is if you can give
little kids on the other team, some confusion, some hesitation
where, you know, it's almost like they're at times, you know,
we're playing on a high school field with other Sometimes when

(27:13):
there's a whistle from the othergame, the other kids kind of
everybody kind of pauses or throws them, just that
hesitation. So I was like the slow mesh,
might work here. So we did it the first game and
it worked for a long touchdown because it just was like, what
is going on? The kids were hesitate, we gave
it to on our kids and then we talked about it.

(27:35):
Like I had watched there was a was a backup quarterback, who
played the NFL for a while who did like a 14 minute break down,
I had all 25. E 2 of he didn't know why they
read it the way they did. But there was a lot of stuff and
a lot of good video of it. So my son and I watched it a
bunch of times and we didn't, you know, I know Dave Clausen.
I at one point I had told him, hey, were running slow mesh and

(27:57):
he laughed his head off. And it was like, basically we
had, we had two things off, it was the, the original and then
we would have a read where my son would read.
Basically the right corner back and see if you know, we would
run it. Like I'm giving away the store
but who cares? It's why we would run it to like
one kid, then we run it to like another kid and then probably

(28:19):
the kid, the teamwork. The other team worried about the
most who is our best receiver weed.
Line him up back there and you almost he was never getting the
ball and he was the decoy. The other cornerback would flush
in a my son would. As soon as he saw him coming he
would fire it out and she was like and I was like yeah, it's a
post snap&read for him. She's like we don't get we he's
not using the we can't get them.Use utensils at the table.

(28:42):
Don't Don't do these things. And the thing was, you know,
like what I found, and this is something you touched on a
minute ago. The kids when I would I we would
have play cards and when I wouldsay, hey we're going to run slow
mesh. Most of the kids would get
really excited because it becamepart of their identity.
They would get fired up about it.
We had a leech play which is like an Airaid staple 92.

(29:03):
Some pic play. Like, you know, when it's going
on, you know, when it's happening and you know, full
speed as, you know, like there'sstuff you don't maybe Miss
Whatever, when I watch the film back, I'm like, oh my God, like
one of our kids did it exactly where they're supposed to like
slap hands as they're coming through at that point and I was
like, these kids are doing a like this one kid.

(29:24):
He was one of the, one of the brothers we had it was mostly
our Center. But I was like, he's a really
smart kid and his attention to detail was really good and it
was so it was awesome to see howthese kids were like, we improve
so much from it because they really bought in and they were
seeing good results. Yeah, I just wanted to let
everyone know slow mesh. Which is like what you see North
Carolina, does it Wake Forest? You mentioned, Dave, Claussen is

(29:47):
like an RPO it's like a long long ride into the line of
scrimmage where you could end uphanding it.
But then it also can be used as like an RPO where you'd pull it
and you throw and it's a pretty interesting kind of scheme that
a handful of college teams use. So I just want everyone to
realize like you guys in seven or eight year old football flag
football or now doing slow mesh and you mentioned air raid.

(30:08):
So it's just it's just really cool to hear people just to hear
you. Talk about how important this
was and how much ownership your kid took.
Because at the end of the day, it's fun to win, the kids have
fun, but at the end of the day, the experience that you get to
have with your child, in this case, your son, like, these are
the things you can't ever go back and do.

(30:29):
So I want to talk a little bit about your approach as the
parent, right? So, that was your approach as
the coach. You obviously took it,
seriously. You wanted to prepare the kids
to have success and spent a lot of time, but oftentimes the
challenge of coaching your own child and I Through this on a
daily basis. We spend six nights a week at
the fields and it's hard. Right?

(30:50):
There's the balance of. I want everyone to know that I'm
going to coach my kid, the hardest thing.
He's not just playing quarterback because he's my kid.
So you almost end up swinging the pendulum a little bit to the
other end where you're like overly critical of him too.
So everyone knows you're not baby and your kid, but then you
also sit there and you're like, man, I feel kind of bad.
I was maybe a little too hard onmy kids, like, what was your
approach? And I know they're young.

(31:10):
But, like, what was your approach to coaching?
Your kid like, how did you manage the role as Dad and
Coach? Yeah, so I noticed a couple
weeks ago, maybe there's maybe just two months ago you had dr.
Michael Gervais on, and I know him from, you know, he said,
Pete caroled, he loves them, tons of Olympic athletes have
worked with him as a sports psychologist and I've been

(31:31):
around him a lot through Elite 11 and he talked about that very
thing about being supportive andchallenging and that balance.
And so with my own son, like there are certain things Is
where it's like, I know, you know, you're demanding at times
in practice and certain things where it's like, okay look,

(31:52):
we're going to show you certain things that you didn't realize
you're doing even just like yourbody language, right?
Like you're not your knees aren't bent.
You're doing things like but butthere's an interesting like your
I feel like you're talking yourself off the ledge
sometimes. So I don't think like he plays
some quarterback in the red zoneand a times and different

(32:12):
things. Like we had other kids who I
felt like headstrong maybe stronger arms and he was a he
was actually a you know probablyour best running back and so
like I do I'm not, I have no illusions of.
He's going to be a high school football, star anything, he
loves football. Now, he's a pretty good little
player that's great, that's where we're at.
But, you know, he's been around a bunch of, you know, like he's

(32:34):
been around a bunch of because of where I work and who, you
know, where we live, you know, he's been around, he's been
exposed to some, some high-levelfootball people at times.
So when he's throwing, you know,the one thing, you know, I will
say to them and practices a frontside closed and just so his
front arm is here when it's really as opposed to like he's
swinging through and he's you know, his mechanics or a little

(32:56):
off and he's really going to practice.
But when games happen and he's being rushed, or he's chasing
the front side is flying open, Imade it just is.
And I saw that and I was like, you know what, I'm going to keep
my mouth shut to him because he's making the right decisions,
he's going the right. Places with the ball like, you
know, in our league where it's basically almost like

(33:16):
seven-on-seven, you know, he mayget to his third read which is
nuts to say for, you know, but he's only being rushed by one
guy, you know. So but I didn't want to say I
didn't want to harp on him thinking that much through like
he's doing the right things if he can if he can fix that or
address that at some point great.
But like I don't want to wear him out on some of these things.

(33:40):
Right? You know like there's certain
things that I said to him go into after the season I was
like, here we have three goals for you and you know, like
there's we would harp on this asa defense, you know.
Nope. You know, you got to be deeper
than the deepest because and I don't know how much the you see
this, you know, where you're at.But like with us in this league,

(34:01):
the kids who are most concerned about the kid who's across from
them priests map and maybe that kid you know, goes in motion
maybe that kid, just runs a hitch.
But where, where we would get in?
Trouble at times. Is it would be the Deep
overcoming behind somebody, where you're just thinking on
the kid who's in front of you know, you got to understand

(34:21):
what's, you know, and our best players would get sucked in, you
know, they just would let go maybe the teens using the team's
didn't complete it but it was like, hey you got to get you
know, I'd have more awareness and we would say it over and
over and show them on film. And so I don't want to say that
stuff's like non-negotiable we're still talking about us you
know eight eight year olds, right?

(34:42):
So I know it was challenging. I know it was challenging like
the the man who coached with me.He's in the military and his
sons and awesome kid in a reallygood player.
And I think you could tell we were both hardest on our kids
and practice. Maybe not so much in games, but
at practice, right and probably harder than we probably should
be, you know, but like at one point late in this season I

(35:05):
remember my son at once said in the car ride back in our car
rides were I don't want to do the best part of this but there
were 25 minutes where we just talk.
Talk, right? And it's like we have twins
where our daughter. You know, my son is a twin and
his sisters like you know, sometimes you're mixing time
right? We have multiple kids.
It's not just the always one-on-one and so we'd be in the
car and he said, you know, Daddy.

(35:25):
I was like their first touchdownwas actually my fault.
I should have been over there islike, oh my God, where did that
come from, you know, like, and that's usually not him.
Like, he's not the mr. Accountability, like he's the
guy who didn't flush the toilet,he's the guy, you know, like
there's like 19 things in this house that he will blame on his
sister or somebody. Or me or whatever.
But I was like okay he's you know, doing that, but it's hard

(35:47):
because you want to like impart stuff on them, but you have to
have like almost like an outsideIran.
What you're doing, you know? And like I'd ask you this
because you've been around a lotof you Sports on on baseball as
well, like, I've seen where likethe coaches, if you're a, if
you're a coach and you're super wound up, and stressed and maybe

(36:10):
you're on the rafts, or maybe your, you know, it's The kids
feel that. It's I don't think it's helping
them, it's just hard, not to be that way, but I think it's like
the kids are going to feel that and maybe it when they get
older, they respond better to itthan they do when they're really
young. But I was like, I really try to
be mindful of like even if I gotfrustrated with something I was
like don't you know just you know keep my mouth shut or just

(36:31):
kind of turn my head just because they're kids and they're
not going to respond well if youyeah if you could it's hard and
it goes, It goes both ways. It's hard, right?
And especially as they keep getting older are our football
team now. Fifth and sixth grader.
So they're a little bit older, right?
These, some of these kids have turned 12.
It's an 11 you league, but in the fall, a lot of these kids
are turning 12. So they're a little bit older, a

(36:52):
little bit, you know more matured.
Yes, none of these kids are overly mature, at least, mine
aren't. But I also, by the way segue, I
have nine year old boy girl twins as well.
So I get it, I totally get the dynamic.
But anyway, so, you know, there's a, there's a fine
balance that I found between. Yes, you're right, the kids, the
environment. Kids operate in goes a long way

(37:14):
into how they feel and to how they approach the game and how
they approach practice. And that's on the adults.
There is also what I found is the more accustomed you can get
your kids meet, not your own kids, the kids on your team,
your coaching to be able to operate in chaos.
Operate when things are tense, when things are loud, when

(37:36):
things are pressure-packed, the more they're used to operating
in those environments. Game day comes and whether you
can control your own sideline oryour own Dugout or your own
bench, but you can't enjoy it. You can't control the gym, you
can't control the other parents,you can't control the bleachers,
the stands, the umpires, the refs, the more, the kids get

(37:57):
used to operating when things are going on around them, and
they up, and they're used to it.The better they get at just
continuing on the mission at hand and letting that other
stuff. Just be noise.
So that would be the one to end one thing back.
Like I've been on Teams or I've seen teams where everything had
to be very controlled. And every practice had to be
very calm. We didn't want the kids to be

(38:19):
over straight but then we'd get into a game and we would try to
just control ours but we couldn't control what the other
Dugout was doing or we couldn't control how loud the other
parents were. And then all of a sudden, our
kids found themselves like overwhelmed, because we always
tried to create this like very, you know, insulated very
controlled, calm environment. But that's unfortunately, as
they keep getting older, that's going to be very few and far

(38:41):
between, you know, so it's a fine line but it's something
that I found has benefited our kids wear.
When the game got hard, our kidswere better when the game got
loud and chaotic. The kids got better because that
was how we practiced that was the environment, which we put
them in a lot. And I'm not talking when they
were six, but now as middle school, kids getting ready next

(39:03):
year to try out for their middleschool football team, and
there's cuts and there's no playtime rules.
Anymore. And if you don't play well, you
sit on the bench and it becomes a little more real.
I think there's an element to Preparing the kids for that that
does them a good, you know, thatdoes them a good bit when they
get ready for school ball which to me is why we're all doing

(39:23):
this right? Just I want my kid to make his
middle school team and have a great experience and then after
that, we'll worry about high school and then whatever happens
happen. So that's, that's kind of our
approach. But But I'll tell you it is
hard. It gets very stressful.
We've been trying to teach our kids right and left for three
months and we still call play tothe right and they want to go
left. So I'm with you, it's very

(39:44):
stressful. It's interesting because we had
a game late in the sea, you're talking about the distractions.
And so the way our High School stadium was set up, the families
would be on just one end zone and I never thought about like
you know we would always defer but I would never think about
like do we want it? Where do we want to like In
retrospect, after I found out what I saw like one game was

(40:06):
again, maybe we don't want to defend it like that end zone in
the second half. I'd rather, you know, because
what I found is we played a teamthat had won the league
championship the year before andthey were a good team and they
had been together and we had a decent sized lead in the second
half and we threw a couple of pics and we ended up losing.

(40:28):
And but when we was our last regular season game, The kids,
some of the kids got, I could tell they got rattled because
they could hear the other families.
They weren't trying to Rattle our kids.
They were just really excited for their kids, which is
awesome, you know, right. But, our kids definitely were
were, you know, like they were mindful of that, right?
And, and they were hard on themselves after the game and

(40:51):
especially like are, you know, my assistant coaches son, who's
up, who's really good, but he was hard on himself.
And, you know, it's interesting to see what motivates different
kids, like how How do you know you're trying to push buttons?
And you know, are you, you know like you don't know how kids
reach kid responds to to not success right?
And so you know I was worried about my son who's like a really

(41:16):
competitive kid in sometimes in a rotten and irrational way and
you know like are like this, there are three best players,
they handled it differently, thefirst loss and my son and I'm
not you know I was like I don't know how I feel about this but
like in the car ride back, He had one of his teammates over
that afternoon. He was fine.

(41:37):
Like it was like and I don't know, part of it was hey I
scored two long touchdowns. I did my part what kind of thing
which was like, I don't know if that's, you know, the greatest,
you know way, whereas the other kids were really wearing it
because we was our first loss. But what was neat was we played
that team in the championship and our kids really like they
all played their best game. And so what I took from that was

(42:00):
like, Hey, if we lose a game, Oh, this is going to be a good
experience for you guys because we are definitely going to get
better. We're going to learn from this
and those kids did, and I think they did on their, I think they
really did as much on their own,figuring it out, as much as
anything I could have said or, you know, the, you know, their
parents could have said. And I think, you know, at the
end of the day, like the fact that, you know, like adversity

(42:25):
to an eight-year-old was losing that game is, is is a big maybe
as a big deal? Now it's not a big deal.
Just a few of the kids on the team but it's a big deal to a
couple of the kids on the team and to see how they respond to
it. And, like, let's get better at
this and let's like, that's Way Beyond football for them.

(42:45):
And I think that's the part thatI was like, you know, there's so
much more here, just like we're talking about like, this
experience, connects you as parents.
Like your, you don't have to have a son who plays football.
It could be a daughter who playsbaseball, or softball, or
basketball or soccer, or whatever, like it's how you
connect to them. I'm like, and I really it's just

(43:06):
the thing that kind of connects us as people and totally how
they grow from it. I think is really, you know, is
a really interesting thing to share with people and that's
what the whole Youth Sports Experience is about, at least it
again, in my, in my view. And that's was a big reason why
we started this show because this is the world, I grew up in
this is the world. This is the only world I've

(43:27):
known and I've done a lot of thethings wrong.
I've had a lot of questions. I've had a lot of nights.
Like you said, right? In bed and reconsidered, you
know things we did or how we ranpractice or why I feel like the
kids have kind of plateaued and we're not keeping you know not
getting better. Development is at the core of
every team that we run. It's how do we get from the
start of the season? When you give me your kid to
that the end of the season? When I give them back to you,

(43:49):
how much progress were they ableto make?
And then collectively, as a teamwere the some of those
improvements and along the way. If we focus on that, we're going
to win a lot. Winning to me is a byproduct
winning to me at the Youth. Level is a byproduct of doing
things. The right way.
We don't set out to win. We set out to do everything the
right way. Maximize every kid's abilities,
push them Beyond maybe, where they even thought they could go.

(44:12):
And if you do that every single day, you will win.
And that's the way I try to describe it to our families and
along the way. You might think we're too hard
on your kid or were asking them to do things that are outside of
their capabilities. But oftentimes, I've always
found this. Oftentimes, it's the adults who
set the boundaries for kids. It's the adults who say he can't

(44:32):
do this. He can't do this.
This is too hard. This is too long.
This is too many hours it, and if you ask the kids, you'd okay.
Yeah, this is great, why? Right?
And you almost has indulged. Remind yourself like their kids,
they can do way more than we give them credit for it.
So that to hear you say that is very in line with kind of our
approach. So the last question I'm going

(44:52):
to leave you with again. Thank you, Bruce Bruce Feldman
for joining us today. To not only share your
perspective on just the sports landscape that you've covered
for two decades, but also your personal, I'll Journey, which
you were so cool to write about for the, for the athletic.
So, the last, the last question I have for you, is as other
parents out there listening and maybe their coach and their
daughter softball team and theircoach, and their sons travel

(45:15):
baseball, or soccer team, whatever it is like, tell what
message do you have for them about the lot of those parents
out there that say I don't want to coach my kid?
I don't want to be involved. I want to keep that parent
relationship. Like, what would be your your
message? You would leave them with as
they kind of hear you talk aboutyour journey?
Your kid for the first time, if you can do it, if you have the

(45:36):
time, do it. Because you know, I feel
fortunate, my son, like I said, he's obsessed with football.
So these conversations he's really into it.
He like Daddy is the film up that kind of stuff.
He's, you know, that's not quitenormal, but it's the has shared
experience. You have, but it's also the
connection you make with these other families, right?

(45:57):
Like I feel like this, you know,we had this team, some version
of this team, you know, back to Back Seasons.
Now, you know, I'm going to feela connection to them and, you
know, Way Beyond, you know, you know, these kids don't go to
school with my son but I still feel like a connection to those
families because of it. And I think the most important

(46:17):
thing is like and I heard this from I think this was temporary
on your podcast a while back where you know, I've known Tim,
you know, back as Rutgers days, where he talked about the
communication, just be listening, right?
And like, I Think It's tricky because I know when I'm not the
head coach and I'm like, I can'tbe a head coach right now.

(46:38):
Like a I'm busy in college football season.
So, you know, I can go to my son's games and that's the
extent of it and you're seeing stuff, you may be like hmm you
know there's certain things you would do differently or you
wonder how well prepared they are or whatever.
And it's like you know at the end of the day you know, you
just can really can only controlwith what's best for your kid,
but you know, you can't catch them every time they're going to

(47:02):
fall. And I think the thing is, you
know, like, Hey, we're going to do the best we can, you know,
certainly, you know, when you'retalking about you and Luke, I
mean, the technique, the technique expertise that you
have is obviously insane. Compared to like what the the
average dad is or mom is going to bring to it but like fine.
What kind of works for you and the to me the biggest thing is

(47:23):
hey let's just get better because you can't control, you
know if there's some some team out there that is just
absolutely loaded. You know, you probably going to
lose if your team isn't similarly talented, but the best
you can do is like, hey, what dowe, what do we want to get good
at? What do we want to teach these
kids about the, the game? Like, I mean, I can't tell you

(47:46):
how much we talked about like spacing with, you know,
especially as like because it's like almost seven on seven
football and different concepts but what all you all, I feel
like Beyond this. All you want to do is have the
kids on your team. Want to keep playing right, that
you want them to keep playing itas long as you.
An do that whether you win Champion, you know, when your
league championship or you go 500 or you don't want it all.

(48:10):
Just like make sure they have a good experience because you
know, and it's different. I get it.
When you're, you know, you're getting up, you're 12 years old.
I think it's getting closer to like more of a, you know, formal
process. But I mean, just, it's really
keep it in the relationships andfor the kids who can handle what
they can handle and keep it simple for them.
Right? We had we had a girl on our

(48:32):
team. Who didn't really know she was,
she never played before. We basically had her focus on
one thing, she became our designated Russia by the end of
our season. She was like the Von Miller of
the league. She just like would focus.
I she's a good athlete, she would get confused.
When we were drop her into coverage.
That that was a little harder for us or like, hey, let's just

(48:55):
focus on this one thing she got your good at, do it?
Yeah. And if we kept people like I
know I know certain parents would be like hey You talked to
him about electors for it, you know, like a lot of football
stole my no, I'm not telling some of the kids about certain
things in football that I'm surewill confuse them.
I'm only talking to the kids about like what?
I think they can handle, and keep it as simple and let them
just go play and have fun and take pride in what they're

(49:18):
doing, totally be. It's A Life Lesson, right?
Find something you're good at, find something you like and do
it, whether it's rushing the passer and flag football, or
whatever it is. That's I think that's a Very,
very good way to end it here because I think that's the
message why Bruce. I can't thank you enough for
sharing that personal story. I know it's one you've written

(49:40):
about, we wanted to have you on the show now here to talk about
it for some time. So I appreciate you taking
taking some time out of your day, and we hope to have you
back here. And hopefully you guys win the
championship again next year. Hopefully, I will afford to look
forward to your next, all your shows because it's really, I
think it's a great resource for all of us as parents, who are in
this space. Just to kind of you can get Then

(50:01):
from it, especially when, you know, because of your
background. I think sometimes people take
for granted oh this guy was a, you know, all pro and play in
the NFL and and this and that and to see and hear kind of the
challenges is, is it's somethingyou gives you a really good
perspective. I think on it, I'm gonna go
write a practice plan. Now for our, we had a big game
that we play a really good team.We play one of those loaded

(50:22):
teams this weekend, so we got tohave a good practice tonight.
So, I'm off to write a practice plan, get the kids from school
and get to practice. So, thanks Bruce, I really
appreciate your time. Thanks Greg.
I hope you enjoyed that conversation with Bruce just to
then be able to just connect dadto Dad and just hear you know
how just incredible his experience coaching.

(50:44):
His sons football team was and you know, the ups and the downs
and the struggles of laying in bed at night, trying to figure
out how to get, you know, these kids to improve and I can
totally relate to that. So, when I, when I read that
story that he wrote in the athletic, it picked up a lot of
Buzz and I was one of them and Iwas one of them and immediately
reached out and said, hey, this conversation this article, you
wrote is so in line with We're doing on you think and he was

(51:07):
kind enough to join us and also kind of be our little bit of our
college football Insider, so it was a great conversation.
Hopefully, you guys enjoyed it. Talking about college football.
I know I've said this before. My producer Tasha babers, her
dad, is the head football coach at Syracuse.
I texted her late. What was that Friday night?
When Syracuse had that big win over Virginia?

(51:27):
So I'm going to welcome into four and oh, Syracuse.
That's right. For our we can't say that.
Oh yeah, we can't say that very often.
This is a great week. Enjoy it while you can is your
dad just fired up or what? Yeah, he's fired up and we have,
you know, Wagner this weekend. So we have a chance to be 5 and
0, which I think is the first time since?
I don't know. I think was like the 60s or

(51:48):
something. Someone check me there, but it's
exciting. It's exciting to be Syracuse
Orange. Also exciting is we've got more
fan questions for you. Greg, the first one says, what
traits mindsets or phrases? Would you recommend that young
athletes model? You know, I think.
Wow, that's a good question and,you know, I think it reminds me

(52:10):
of our conversations with dr. Drew baby.
But you know the ones that I always try to instill in my own
children, you know my own children, my team's is I want to
see kids who are going to go outthere and compete, right?
I think if you can, if you can sum all of this up into you know
what are we trying to teach our kids?
It's it's not so much the end outcome.

(52:30):
It's not. Are you the best player?
Are you the fastest kid, do you score the most touchdowns?
You hit the most homeruns? Are you the kid when things get
hard? When the game's not going your
way? Maybe you struck out.
Maybe you've had, you know, you threw an interception, maybe,
whatever the case may be, can you dig down and fight through
adversity? Can you learn to control your

(52:52):
emotions? If you're upset, you're
frustrated, you're all these things.
Can you Channel all that? Block it out.
And say, all right, I'm going togo out there and the harder, it
gets the harder. I'm going to dig down and
compete. I'm going to focus on my Focus
on what I've been coached to do.I'm going to focus on what my
team needs for me, and this given moment, and I'm going to
push aside all of that. You know, the - that has

(53:14):
happened to me, you know, throughout the course of this
game or practice or season to me.
That's what I want to see, out of my own kids.
I want to see that out of the kids that I coach, we will teach
them. We will fix the mistakes.
There are always going to be mistakes and we say this to our
tackle football team. All the time, we will make
mistakes today and we will make mistakes in the final game of

(53:35):
the season. Now, nothing will ever be
perfect. Nothing will ever be exactly how
he drew it up, but if you are motivated to again, just
everyday come in and try to improve and try to do things the
way your coach to do and when itgets hard you're at your best.
If we can continue to build thatmindset and that approach,
everything else is easy. You know, will teach you how to

(53:55):
catch. Will teach you how to block
will. Teach your footwork will teach
you how to field a ground ball. Like to me, that's the easy part
of Youth Sports. I think coaching mindset
coaching, competitiveness. Coaching the ability to fight
through adversity to me. Those are the early lessons that
we want to build this all on. Because once you get that the
sky's the limit. Yeah, going off of that.

(54:16):
This question is kind of similarthe next audience.
Question says, I feel like work ethic is different than back in
the day. So how do you instill?
Good work ethic and the teams that you coach You know, I think
work ethic is really connected to habits, you know, I think
routine building good habits in.This is something we harp on a
lot. Everything you do.

(54:37):
You're either building good habits or bad habits.
So if you're going to be out there, and it could be something
as simple as playing catch, it could be something as simple as
you know, taking batting cage, swings off a tee.
Whatever it is, everything you do.
You're either building good or bad habits, and we have the same
with our team is how you do. Some things is how you do
everything. So if you think, You're going to

(54:57):
be able to go out there and get in the cage or have a catch in
warm-ups or whatever it is. Do a walk-through and football.
If you think you can do that subpar and you can do that not
to your best. But don't worry coach when it's
the game when it's the bottom ofthe sixth or when it's the
fourth quarter and my team needsme at my best, I'll be at my
best, it doesn't work like that.So the idea of working hard is

(55:20):
great but just working is not somuch as important as what are
you working on? And what is the mindset?
You're working in. If the mindset you're working in
is everything I do is one more opportunity to train my brain to
train my body to build good habits.
That's one is one more increasedopportunity than the bad habits
creeping in when you don't want them.

(55:43):
And that to me is the hardest thing to get across to young
kids is they think that they have this ability.
We're okay. This drill is less important
than that drill. This game is less important than
this game. This practice and they think
they can turn it on. Turn it off.
Turn it. Turn it off.
So the thing we harp on the mostis every time we're out here,
whether it's an individual lesson, whether it's a team

(56:03):
practice, or whether it's the championship game, at the
biggest Tournament of the year, we have to always have the
switch on every throw, every catch, every at bat every
walkthrough rep, every whatever it is has to be game like
Championship, like, because that's how your body builds good
habits. That's how you build the routine
and the mindset. That that's the only way my body

(56:25):
knows, it's the only way. My brain knows.
Now when the game gets hard, I can rely on those good habits, I
can rely know I've built this series of, you know,
performances that allow me now to go out there and expect
success and it doesn't mean you're always going to have
success, but it gives you a lot better chance of having success
than. If you just continue to try to

(56:46):
gauge your intent gauge, your effort, based on what you think
the circumstances are in the moment.
So that's a hard battle for everyone.
Let alone you know for adults let alone the kids It, I think
it's super important. That's good.
And then the last one is kind ofan interesting question.
He says, lots of people have said I'm harder on my kid when I

(57:07):
coach him because I don't want anyone to say that I was
favoring him. Is it possible that being too
hard on my kid for fear of what people say is selfish and not
keeping the best interest of my kid first?
Because I'm basing how I coach on what people are saying about
me, and I'm a little bit self-conscious about that, I'll
tell you. That's an impressive question,

(57:28):
whoever whoever put this in Somereally good self-awareness,
that's some really good, you know, ability to kind of
reflect, to be honest with yourself.
And I think he's he, or her is 100% accurate on this.
That's something that I wrestle with all the time.
I've talked, I've been very openand honest about that, sometimes
you're so conscious about not being seen as Daddy ball, or

(57:51):
Mommy ball. You're so conscious about not
about other parents, not saying,well, his kid only gets these
opportunities because of the dadand this that you do coach your
kid harder, you do expect more out of your kid and you do push
them. But then there are times where
you're so unjustly on your soap,unfair to your own kid that now
you're putting your own kid in asituation where they can't

(58:13):
succeed. And at the end of the day,
that's definitely not what you want.
So I think that's a really, really good observation and it's
a really hard balance. You don't coaching your kid, is
hard coaching, your kid is not easy.
We it's a big part of, you know,the conversations we've had
here. Not only with dr.
Gervasoni But countless coaches and and parents.
It's, it's a challenge. I do think there's also that

(58:35):
idea of adults worrying about what other adults think of them.
I think, especially if you have friends on the team or other
families that you're close with and you're coaching their kids,
you know, you don't want anything to get in the way of
that relationship. There's a lot that goes on and I
think for whoever submitted thisquestion, that is real.
I guess when I try to remind myself of is I'm going to coach
all the kids, the same I'm goingto be hard on my kid because if

(58:58):
I'm going to be hard on your kid, I need to be hard on my kid
but I got to make sure. I don't go overboard and at
times I have at times. I've taken it too far and I've
got to be better at that, but I think you have to coach your
kids still and not punish them because they're your kid and
they still deserve the opportunities and they still
deserve the the space and the environment that they can

(59:19):
flourish and they can succeed. And they can't, you know, had
that held against them because their dad happens to be the
coach. So it's a delicate balance.
The fact that this person recognizes it is the first step
and I just always try to check in and say hi.
I am, I am I doing this right? And often times I say no,
sometimes I say yes. And the times I say no I got to,
you know, kind of adjust Midstream.

(59:41):
But um but this is a super really really good question as a
lot of layers to it and I think that's going to be a question.
We have dr. Dre on that.
We're going to, we're going to bring up to him.
Yeah, that's a great one for him.
Well, that's all the fan questions we have for today.
Keep submitting them at Google Center at you.
Think on Instagram Tick, Tock, or Twitter?
Well, thank you Tasha. Appreciate you go.

(01:00:01):
Orange. Let's go tell your pops.
We said, keep it rolling this week and thank you guys all so
much for listening here on you think, please continue to rate
review, subscribe wherever you, get your pods and we look
forward to seeing you guys next week.