December 23, 2025 • 45 mins
As 2025 comes to a close, Youth Inc. reflects on the year's most memorable moments in youth sports. From breakthrough performances and inspiring coaching insights to the athletes and stories that defined the season, we highlight the best content, conversations, and lessons that remind us why youth sports matter. Sign up for our newsletter at https://www.youth.inc/newsletterFor more, visit https://www.youth.inc/
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Youth. Sports in America are at a
crossroads, and I'm here to helplead the conversation forward
I'm Greg Olson. Each week we're sitting down
with top athletes, coaches and more to talk about what's
working, what's broken and what's next.
Welcome to you think, but I wantto read a quote A wise man once
said, I encourage everyone to play football for the simple
(00:22):
reason that it is hard. And I think I, I want to start
there because I think it's a really, if anyone doesn't know,
Tom is the one who said that it,it's AI.
Just think it really paints the picture into just your entire
approach, just the way you view things, the way you went after
things, not only in your career,your post career, your business
ventures. Where did that mindset?
(00:43):
Where did that mindset of embracing difficult challenges
and pushing through the hard? Like where did that all start
for you? I think the interesting part is,
is the journey of football for me started at a young age, but I
wasn't probably the, the typicalkid that you think would, would,
would reach, you know, 23 seasons in the NFL and to be a
(01:04):
part of 7 championship teams. I didn't play Pop Warner
football. It really wasn't available where
I grew up and when I started playing, I was a freshman in
high school. We had three teams at our
school, the freshman team, the JV team and the varsity team.
I started on the freshman team, but I didn't even start.
I started playing as a freshman,but I was the backup quarterback
(01:26):
on our freshman team and we wereO and seven to start my freshman
career. I fell in love with the sport
because the 49ers. I didn't know how to put pads in
my pants at that age. I was looking around on all the
other kids the. Kids.
Still don't. If it makes you feel any better,
the kids still don't know how. OK, good.
Thank God, because I was lookingaround like how, how, how do I
put the the butt pad in and the back can't even see it and you
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got to put it on the loop through the pad.
It was a disaster. And I just remember getting out
on the field and I of course, I'd watch football growing up
and I was, but I never played it.
And then you heart start hearingall the play calls and what do I
do on a pinch stunt and on a, you know, how am I going to play
linebacker? Well, thankfully I couldn't play
linebacker. They, they found me at
(02:08):
quarterback, but because I had adecent arm, but I didn't really
play. And I'll make a Long story
short, it was a, it was a struggle for me and people
wouldn't see this now, but my second year is on.
I played junior varsity and I ended up winning the starting
job because the guy was the freshman quarterback quit and we
were OK that year, but I really fell in love with the sport.
And then my third and fourth year I started on varsity and I
(02:30):
got lightly recruited to Michigan and ended up choosing
there because I thought, OK, I was a bit naive of how hard it
actually would be. But I was like, you know, if I
want, if you want to be the best, you got to beat the best.
But of course, I was nowhere in the realm physically or mentally
or emotionally where a lot of these other kids were when they
arrived at campus of Michigan. I was, there were six other
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quarterbacks ahead of me at Michigan when I started, started
and I fought my whole career, college career to, to end up
getting to start. And I started my 4th and 5th
year and there was a lot of struggles along the way.
And I would say I had a good college career.
It wasn't great. I thought I'd be a second or
third round pick in the NFL because I developed and I was
(03:14):
very much like Bloomer. And then I got picked by the
Patriots at 199 and then was the4th quarterback on the depth
chart when I started at the Patriots.
So I guess my point in saying this is I really valued when I
did get a chance to play as a starter, I really valued where I
was at because it was hard for me.
(03:35):
And every step along the way wasa challenge for me to get from
one year to the next, to get from the freshman team to the
junior varsity team, the junior varsity team to the senior team,
this the, the varsity team to the, the college team.
And in, in my red shirt freshmanyear was hard and everything
about it was a challenge, but I really valued it and I knew that
OK. And I always said this thing,
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well, if they put me on the field, Tommy, they're never
going to take you off. And fortunately for me and, and
it was tough situation for Drew,but he got injured in his second
year. And when I remember running on
the field, I felt I was really prepared because I knew how to
compete. And I, I ran out on my field in
the second year. I think I was 24 years old and I
(04:17):
basically played for for 21 straight seasons after that.
And every step along the journeyfor those 21 years was a
challenge. And I think when I referenced
how hard it was, it was never something that to me, you could
just, hey, let's just roll my helmet on field.
I think you and I both played with players like that, that
they're really talented as youth.
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They never really learn how to develop a great work ethic.
And I'm not saying they don't work hard.
I'm just don't say they don't work as hard as they could
possibly work. They work to a level of their
comfort and then they don't. They're competitive, but they
never have to be ultra competitive because they're
physically just a lot better than everybody else.
So I think just some of those teachings and learnings that I
(05:03):
had ended up being great blessings in my life.
It was a blessing that it was hard and I think for.
For no, sorry, go ahead, go ahead.
No go. Ahead.
No, I just think it's a blessingwhen it is hard because you
there were so many times along the way where I thought, man,
maybe it should be easier than this.
Or maybe I should go take a easier route.
Maybe I should go to a lesser competitive school than
(05:23):
Michigan. You know, that was one.
Maybe I should quit football because that would have been
easier in high school. But I look back and I go, you
know what? I'm so happy I didn't because it
it built up a level of determination and resilience in
me that was able to transcend decades in professional sports.
And when we think of the great players and not everyone's going
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to be a great player, but whether you want to be a great
player in life, you want to be agreat athlete in life, you want
to be a great member of your family, You want to be a great
member of your community. You want to do great in your in,
in your office job. Well, you better be a great
teammate and you better learn toovercome the things that don't
go your way. Because a lot of times the
things that don't go on your way, if you look at them as a
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blessing and you learn from it and you get more determined for
it and more resilient than it will be a blessing.
And that will carry you a lot further in life than something
that's given to you. So many young coaches that I see
focus so much about how much do I know about the sport, right?
I'm a young high school footballcoach.
Everything's XS and OS. I'm a young basketball coach, a
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baseball coach. I want you to talk about the
role of a coach, but not becauseyou draw the best offensive
plays or you've got the best no huddle offense or tell me in
your mind like the role of the best coaches you've been around,
whether that's guys on your staff or guys you coached under
or like, just give an idea of like in your mind championship
(06:47):
coaching is what? That's a great question.
I, I, I wish I could, I wish that my, my staff could hear
this right now. Because you're really.
Boiling this down to what reallymatters the most at any level, I
think the first thing is you teach, you know, sometimes I
want to even say to our coaches,slow down.
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Just talk to this young man, coach him.
Ask him what what is he seeing? What is he thinking?
What is going through his mind? What is he looking at?
What is he seeing? You know, we always just like
you said, want to go on to the next play or, you know, just so
you know, want to coach him hard.
And we do. We all have to coach hard.
But like sometimes we just need to like talk to them and teach
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them. Now we're not going to coach
effort. We're not going to coach focus
like that, that that's somethingthat is a whole another
conversation. But if you have guys who are
willing to give great effort, willing to focus you, you have
to teach them. And then you have to drill those
things that you're doing. And then you have to build up
this foundation. You know, we're we have this
book. I got it right here that we're
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we're reading as a team. It's called chop wood carry
water and it's a great book. And each each chapter is only
like about a 45 second read. It's really quick.
And So what we did as a team this summer is every day we had
a player get up and summarize what the chapter meant.
And so we had it on the, on the indoor, on the indoor, we had it
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on the, the monitors in the building.
And everybody had to kind of read that.
And then we'd pick them out. So somebody would have to read
and explain what that was. And to me, like it's, it's the,
it's, it's, that is a great bookbecause it's all about the
process over the results. Like you're constantly working
on the process and you know, like, for instance, one of the
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chapters talks about how every inch matters, every decision
that you make matters. If you eat McDonald's today,
you're not going to get fat and overweight and sick.
But if you eat it every single day, eventually that's going to
happen. Like who you hang out with.
You know, what you listen to, what time you wake up in the
morning, what you eat, what you focus on, all those things add
up in the end. And when you're focusing on that
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process, when, when you when youfail, it's a good thing.
Like, how do you grow? You grow by failing.
You grow by, you know, first goton a bike, what happened?
You fell off. But how quickly can you learn
from those failures along the way?
But when I watch youth sports today, I, I gotta tell you, like
I watch parents who are screaming and yelling and care
if, if a team wins a fifth gradebasketball game like that,
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that's not it. It's about the process.
Are we actually getting better at the skills that we need to
move on and grow from? And and and that doesn't really
even change when we get to college.
It's the same things like we have to focus on that.
And to your point, you know, we've had games in the past, you
know, the 22 game against Georgia, we miss a field goal in
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the semi finals. And if not, we'll go on to T
against TCU and probably win thenational championship.
Same thing in in in 19. Like we've been a player 2 away
from winning a championship. But the focus has to be on the
process, not the result, becauseyou know, there's a lot of
things that can happen in a game.
So I. I covered a lot of ground,
right? There, but to me important
points. No, I love it.
(09:55):
It's like the old adage, right? How you do some things is how
you do everything great. We, we try to tell our our kids
that we coach. I just had a 7th and 8th grade
for our middle school football team.
We just had our summer workout this morning, 8:00 AM.
We're out there and we preach itlike our brain doesn't know
whether this is a random Wednesday in July or if this is
the fourth quarter and against our bitter rival for the last
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game of the season. We we can't decide when it's
time to turn it on. When it's time, does it matter?
It doesn't matter. Our brains don't know the
difference. And the idea of building those
processes in those routines. You're so spot on.
I want. To show I don't want to cut you
off for one second because I think this is important.
I I think and and having three young kids who are in sports
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and, and seeing them and then seeing their peers is like not
everybody has the same. Burn as the other and.
When you you start to move towards, you know, the higher
levels of competition, sometimesyou need to identify like, who
has that burn, like you had thatburn and like attaching yourself
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to that burn to understand what puts 2 feet on the ground every
day for you to want to be great because not everybody's wired
that way. Now, a part of that is a coach.
Like if you have guys on the team who aren't that wired that
way, how do you motivate them towant to become the best versions
of themselves? And so there, there's two
conversations there. One, you, you want to have those
people who are just wired that way.
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Then the other part is like, howdo you motivate those that are
around who maybe aren't that wired that way to be the best
versions of themselves? Through positivity and
encouragement. Will Howard was the most
positive leader I've ever been around.
I learned a lot from him becausesometimes I can be negative.
He would always make people think they could do more than
they could. He was tremendous that way and I
learned a lot from him. That was his leadership style.
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But the people that you're around who want to be great, and
I see young kids like, I say it to my my daughters all the time.
Like, if you don't want this, don't do it.
Like if you don't want to, then go find a sport, find an
instrument to play, go become the best musician or or you
know, do something else. Be an artist.
Like find what you love and yourpassion and then grab onto it.
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I think sometimes parents want it more than the kids.
Like they have to find their love and their passion and then
they'll own it, and then they'rethe ones that'll wake up earlier
than you. I think parenting is really hard
on its own and it gets really hard when you start, uh,
comparing yourself to other parents.
And that's the really difficult part of like having to be like,
hey, my kid is my kid. They're going to do things at
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their speed and they're going todo things that they want to do.
And you can't compare to other. Like some of my friends would be
like, Oh yeah, my kid it, you know, 4 wanted to play, had a
bat in his hand. Like you said, like being like,
I want to go play and I and, andlike it's, it's just human
nature to then compare your yourchild, but you have to stop
yourself and be like, no, that'snot my kid is going to be his
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own person and he's going to do things at his speed and just
finding that balance because you're right.
Like right now I do have to to somewhat force him to do things.
And the, and the, the craziest thing is that you know, this
like I'll, my, my son will not want to go to Taekwondo.
And then we'll go and he'll havethe best time, of course.
And, and at the end he'll be like, that was awesome.
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Like I broke a board. I got a new belt, all that
stuff. Like he was so happy when he
got, when he went up a level in the belt.
And I was just like, yeah, see, this is, I wish I could bottle
this up and remind you every time we're in the car after
school and being like, you want to go to Taekwondo and you're
like, no, I don't want to go. It's like, remember that moment.
But it's hard because he's 6. You know, it's hard for six year
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olds to, to, to, to understand that and, and like future plans.
So like the comparison thing is really, really difficult.
And I'm sure it gets even more difficult as you get as your
kids get older and every, you know, it gets a little more
competitive and trying to tryingto navigate that where you don't
want to be the overbearing dad who's not only pushing him too
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hard, but also still bragging too much about like what your
kid is doing to a point where you're you now become the person
you don't like. No doubt.
And I and I think you bring up areally good point because there
is an element that again, we're,we're all bias, right?
We we all parent our kids to similar to our upbringing and
similar to our experiences and the things that we love.
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We want our kids to love. We want to share the we want to
go to the Cubs game and have your kid be a die hard Cubs fan
and sit in Wrigley and tell you the batting lineup and like
every dad dreams of that with their kid, that you know, your
kid loves football because that's what we love.
That's what we grew up loving. We grew up watching it.
And everyone wants to share those experiences with their
kids. So there is that element where
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you have to you. I don't know how to teach my kid
to go fishing. I don't know how to teach my kid
to join the band, the orchestra.If they were interested in it, I
would love it. I'd be in the front row at the
recital and I'd be all in if they were all in.
But I only know what I know and I only know what I enjoy doing.
So I guess we all are, selfishlyor biasedly, whatever you want
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to say, kind of push our kids totry to enjoy things that we
enjoy because there is an element to how cool would it be?
Yeah, I love going to Cubs games, but how cool would it be
if, like, me and my kid grew up going there and he was also a
die hard fan? Like right or wrong, that's in
all of our brains, like, and I don't know how we fight that.
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It's, it's really hard. I, my kids have been, I have
season tickets to the Cubs. My kids have been to like 10
games this year and I think my daughter has watched like 2
pitches. You know, she goes because we
can get a hot dog and a pretzel.And, but I, I like going and I,
I think they understand that I like going.
But like there's times where I'mlike, you guys don't even
understand how, how nice it is. You've been to 10 games this
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year. You know, we're halfway through
the summer. You've been to 10 games like so,
but they're, they're still so young.
And then the other thing I struggle with, and this is where
it started on PMT is like, I do want to coach them.
I want to be involved in that way, but I also don't want to do
it too early where I think it's hard for kids where like if your
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dad is coaching you when you're 6, when you're 7, you start
thinking about your, you know, it's just a different
relationship. So it's like, when do I enter
that? Like I would love to, you know,
coach, you know, my son playing basketball, but I also don't
want to be at a, he's at a, he'sat a age right now where if I'm
at the practice, like it's goingto be me like telling him to pay
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attention. And I don't want to do that, you
know what I mean? Because that's, that's kind of,
I have to do that at home. And I don't want to have to do
that when we're, when we're out,you know, doing something that's
supposed to be fun with all his friends.
So trying to find that balance of when I get involved and how
much I get involved. And maybe it's, I don't get
involved at all, but it's, it's,it's, it's, it's very difficult
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because I do want them to like the things I like.
And you're exactly right. Like you in a dream world, it's
like they become a mini me. But that's not going to be
reality. You know, they have to like
their own things. Of course you didn't.
You missed practice the day before the game.
Why do you expect to have a goodgame?
Like trying to get them to understand that while not
everything is in their control, a lot of things are in their
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control. And let's put all of our focus
and effort into that because we're so worried about the
outcome. We're so worried about how many
hits we got or how many catches we had or how many sacks we
made. And I think it's so easy now,
especially raising these kids intoday's world with highlight
reel culture. Like it's very easy to lose
track of the journey. It's very easy to lose track of
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teaching the process because everybody coaches to the
scoreboard, everybody coaches tothe highlight reel.
They coach to the Instagram clipand I think it's a big reason
why youth sports has gone off the rails a little bit is
because we do ignore everything we've talked about up to this
point, everything you just laid out.
I think for a lot of kids aroundthe country, that approach has
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really been lost. I would agree with you.
And I got to be honest, like forsomebody listening or, you know,
who might have a kid that you think could play college
football or, you know, in the pros or, you know, get a
scholarship for some Olympic sport, whatever.
It is these very things that I'msure this resonates with you.
But like, it's not just going to, it's not just going to be
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how your kid plays youth sports.It's going to be how your kid
does everything as an adult and you only get one shot at it.
And, you know, people can changeas they get older and people can
mature in their 20s. We've had teammates who, you
know, show up and they're super talented, but like that they're
just, they don't give a whatever.
And, you know, sometimes they change more often than not,
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though, like people are who theyare in their 20s and 30s and
that sort of thing. And so like, if it weren't for
the things that the process oriented, the process centering
mindset, I don't think I'd have been able to get through eight
years in Saint Louis. You know, and, and I think, you
know, what I'm talking about is like, you know, we're one of 14,
seven and 96 and 10. And so like having won in the
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NFL at the tail end of my career, I look back and I'm
like, how'd you do that? Well, I did it because all I
cared about was when somebody turns on the tape, do I give
great effort? Do I control what I can control?
I don't know how many times I heard my dad say as a pro,
control what you can control. And it's the same things we're
talking about that you're sayingto your 1213 year old son or
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daughter. And when you are an adult and
mom and dad can't help you in the real world, you have to have
those things instilled in you soyou only get one shot at it.
I'm going to err on the side of my kid being tough mentally and
and hard working, yeah. We're going to be tough as hell
physically, mentally, and you'regoing to compete your ass off
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and everything that you do and you're going to have a great
attitude. You're going to treat your
teammates good. Like all that stuff is so
teachable. We can't control if they're 6-7.
We can't control if they one or 45 there is good.
You know what's funny? Speaking of vignette touch dude,
first of all. Really all done my younger son.
I can't even say the number six without him yelling 7 at.
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Me, it's off the board. He's like how, you know, it's
funny. He's like Burnell Washington.
I'm like, he's 68. You know, I lie now I just lie.
I just make up things. But you know what's so funny
about it is before this became like a thing, I don't know if I
realized how many times we all actually say, I don't know, like
(20:20):
6 or 7. Like it's such a common freeze.
Like I don't I don't get it. But I hear it all the time.
But now I find myself like mid sentence being like it's like 6,
it's 9. But just Gee, please don't be.
I don't want to be watching a game.
And by the way, you're the best.We love watching you call games.
Dude, you're just I've told you this, but you're you're
(20:42):
incredible at it. Appreciate it.
And so is my brother Kyle, by the way.
I think he's making up there with you one day.
I'm hoping but but if I catch you doing the six seven thing,
I'm going to turn the TV. Off.
You're not going to catch me. I don't do gimmicks.
I don't do gimmicks. No, you don't.
That's why I left. I don't do gimmicks.
That was an inadvertent teach mehow to be a girl sports dad
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because I only know sports one way.
And, like, I get into these arguments with parents at school
and I'm like, these girls are fine.
Like, they can be coached. We can hold them to high
standards. We don't need to baby them.
Like, yeah, what do we do? Am I crazy?
Like, help me be a better girl dad in sport?
Well, I guess just a girl dad ingeneral, but a girl dad who's
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now trying to help a young daughter navigate, you know,
middle school sports at the moment.
Yeah, well, and and I think it'sit's where your kid is too,
right. Like every kid is different.
Like for example, my daughter inhigh school did not want mom and
dad, who played a lot of soccer,to have any feedback and given
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to her. And so we were like, well, OK,
like, but we can help you, you know?
That's a hard one to. Swap, Yeah.
And you're like, we, but like we've kind of played and, and my
husband coached at a high level.And so it was like, we kind of
know this sport a little bit. Don't you want to like a little
bit of information? And she's like, no more
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information. And so we honored that.
And it wasn't until her like senior year in high school, she
was like, OK, I'm ready. I'm ready now for information
because I realized I need to catch up on stuff, right?
And then she wanted to to grow. And I mean, she always wanted to
grow, but I think it gets to a point where it's like, I just
don't want any more information and I just want to play and all
that. So I think it's where your kid
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is in terms of what they're feeling of the volume and the
amount of information that they're willing to absorb and
honoring that, right? But I also think, yes, I mean,
that was the thing I loved aboutthe national team is like, I was
around a bunch of competitive women that it was OK to push
(22:51):
them in a way that was like really healthy.
And I was like, hell yes, I'm around people now that like
understand like I don't, I don'twant to be baby and I want I
want to play, I want to compete.I want to do these things.
I want to win. I want to win and I don't I
don't, I don't need to hide the fact that I want to win because
this is like all these women around me understand that.
So I do not need think you need to baby them.
(23:14):
I agree with that. But I think the, the problem we
have, and not just inherent to the women's side of the game,
but with youth sports, is that, as Abby was saying, you know,
my, my biggest take away, I havea son who's 16 and now daughter
who's playing at Oregon in her first year as a freshman 18 year
old, is that we, we have a tendency as parents with the
(23:38):
best of intentions to just suck the joy out of it because we are
trying to, as Abby mentioned, figure it out for ourselves.
Like we want our kids to have scholarships.
We want our kids again, with thebest of intentions.
We want them to be successful inthe sport.
And so we push and we train and we have them, you know, think,
(23:58):
you know, just singular sports and, you know, and specify and,
and they end up doing just one sport rather than trying
different sports. So I, I, when, when we talk
about youth sports, I, I don't talk about the kids.
I talk about the parents becausethey're the ones and the coaches
who are dictating the experience.
And we have to our North Star has always been with our family.
(24:22):
Like, do you like it? Like, do you even enjoy it?
And if you don't enjoy it, why are you doing it?
And the parent has to then framethat for them to their behavior
on the sidelines. The way you're talking to a kid
about their goals and expectations, the way we're
talking to them about like, you know, I had a daughter who was
(24:43):
like, so worried that her coach would punish her because she
wanted to go to prom. I'm like, go to prom, like go do
your dances, like go have fun inlife.
Like there will be more games, there will be more tournaments.
We don't have to miss every family vacation because you're
worried about a tournament or a showcase or like like that
(25:03):
perspective from a parent is lost.
I feel like nowadays in new sports and we got to bring that
back. Greg, can I?
Can I? Give you like 1 little tip that.
Please was like 10 tips. This is a good tip I've got.
I got a lot of tips, but one really good tip around the
difference between coaching a young young woman, young girl
(25:25):
versus a young boy, young young man is when when a coach or a
parent is talking to a group in a lot, Let's just say we're in a
locker room and a coach is talking to the team.
If the coach says, you know, oneof you out there is just like
really sucking it up, you're notworking as hard as you need to
do. A group of boys will think, Oh
(25:46):
my God, he's talking to this guyout here.
He's not talking to me. And a group of girls, a group
group of young girls think the coach is talking to them.
So we do have to approach psychologically the way that we
talk to these kids. Yes, I do think setting high
standards and maintaining those high standards is really
important. But especially with with young
(26:08):
girls, they have to, they have to set what that standard is,
right? Like having those conversations
with these young girls is like, what do you guys want out of
this season? What do you want out of your
individual accomplishments? Like what kind of goals are you
setting for yourself? Because then you can hold them
accountable to that stuff. But parents set their own goals
(26:28):
and their own standards for whatthey want for their kids and
they hold their children to thatstandard.
And the kids have not signed on to that.
They have not cosigned that dealso.
That's that is so spot on. Yeah.
Like this connection between hard work and the outcome that
you were talking about, we assume that it's either there
(26:51):
and or not. And if it's not there, we have
to like, as opposed to saying maybe this is something that
emerges slowly. I know lots of people who didn't
make that connection in other parts of their life until they
were in their 30s. I didn't, I didn't work very
hard in my 20s. You did not at writing or I I
spent the latter, the early partof my 30s essentially goofing
(27:15):
off at the Washington Post, sitting in an office in New York
watching MTV and trying to do aslittle work as possible.
I now work harder than I work harder at 61 than I did at 31.
Way harder. It just took me a long time to
figure out that there was this connection between what I
wanted. And I wonder with kids too,
where maybe we're just rushing them on this, that like, there's
(27:35):
a moment I use running an example, there's a moment as a
runner when you really begin to enjoy the connection between the
preparation and the outcome. And part of what's pleasurable
about like a nice long Saturday morning run is you're thinking,
you're already thinking in advance what that's going to
mean when I want to do somethingwith it, right?
That I didn't have that when I was 14.
(27:56):
That's a good point. I got that when I was 50.
I'm looking at it through the frame of a 40 year old who's
only. Professional athlete.
Professional athlete. For my entire life, all I've
ever known is trying to play at a high level and peak
performance and it's all so I'vealmost been trained.
And again, this started for me. I was the son of a high school
football coach who was hard, disciplined, traditional old
(28:17):
school high school football. Legendary high school we won a.
Million games, one of the most in northern New Jersey, right
outside of in Wayne, NJ, right outside the right down Route 3
and public high school won a million games.
Traditional high school, what you would think of the high
school football in the 80s, nineties, 2000s, that was my
dad. That was our program and it
(28:38):
worked. And that's where I learned all
of my habits, all of my grind. Our summer vacations for us were
going to football camps and sleeping on the floors of the
dorm like it's all I ever knew. But I also sometimes have to
check myself and say, OK, these kids don't have 40 years of the
experience in life, life experiences of high achievement
and what, they're 12? So do you, Greg, to just check
(29:00):
your orientation, Can I ask you some questions?
Yeah, just to better understand if there's a a fundamental
orientation to work from and fundamentals, a big word for me,
either I'm approaching success or I'm avoiding failure.
And so in one of those two wouldreveal a lot of somebody's
psychology. So if you if you, let's just do
(29:22):
you and you'll see how this would easily bleed into your
kids that I'm terrified of blowing it.
Go, go. When you were on the field, I
work my ass off. I work.
I was in film. I was doing everything I did my
mental image, I did all of my work so that when Sunday came, I
wouldn't blow it. Or was it more like, no, I got
something and there's a lot of good here and I want to maximize
(29:45):
this because it is so much fun to play and to play freely.
Very different orientations, very different psychological
constructs that. And when I say psychological
constructs, what a construct does is it allows the
effervescent little, small little conversations we have
with ourselves kind of filter into something that has some
weight over time. So when you played, which one
(30:08):
were you? And then how are you doing?
I would imagine you're doing it similar with your kids, not
dissimilar, but can you just open that up?
My my confidence, everything about me was routine in
preparation. I all of my insecurities, all of
my fears, all of my I don't wantto drop the ball.
I want to make like all of that.Just the natural athletic fears
of failure that were in all of our brains.
(30:31):
The only way I knew how to deal with them was I was so routine
oriented. And I knew from Monday to Sunday
morning at 1:00, if I did Monday's routine, Tuesday all
the way through when that ball was kicked off on Sunday, there
was nothing more that I could have done.
I did my entire routine, all my habits from physical body work
(30:53):
to catching to my practice habits, to my workouts.
To talk a little bit more about your parents and your upbringing
and how you guys found the balance between growing up as a
young girl in Colorado and having friends and having
sleepovers and playing, you know, just being a normal kid.
But then also recognizing like, listen, we can harness a really
unique gift and, and the desire to pursue it.
(31:16):
That there is an opportunity. There is a path that you need
for Missy that is not the same path for everybody else.
We can find. We can pursue that with great
intent without sacrificing the other side.
Like how did they do it? As you look back now as a mom,
like, what is your reference of,like, the job they did
protecting you, keeping you innocent, but also keeping you
(31:39):
driven and on course to achieve what you did?
Yeah. Well, I'll talk about them for
an hour. So.
So just buckle up. But my parents are my best
friends. I mean, they are the two most
incredible people that I know. And the more I have grown
becoming a mom, I just have become more in awe of what they
did because at the time when I was that young, right, I didn't
(32:01):
realize that this was their first time too.
Like they always seem so calm and in control that it was like,
oh, they know what they're doing.
And I look back now and I'm like, they had no idea what they
were doing. And now being a mom, I'm like I.
Don't know what I'm doing. They didn't know what they were
doing. Of course, I don't know what I'm
doing. Like we just don't know.
We don't know. But they never ever made me feel
(32:22):
like that. And I, I think I just, I have so
much respect for them. But Greg, I think one thing that
was so important with our familyand and so unique was I was very
intrinsically motivated. And I think my parents
recognized that and they let that work to my advantage.
So my dad talks a lot about being an enabler and not a
(32:43):
motivator. So they would never wake me up
for a practice because at the end of the day, yeah, sure, they
could have come in, woken me up,thrown me in the car, driven me
to practice, but I'm the one getting in the pool like it.
It was up to me whether or not Iwas going to make that practice
worthwhile or a total waste of time.
So why wake me up if that decision is ultimately mine to
(33:06):
begin with anyway? So I would be the one to wake
myself up in the morning. I would have to set my own alarm
and they wouldn't wake me up if I didn't.
But I always did You ever sleep?Did you ever sleep through a
practice? No, no.
But. On the other side, they had
everything ready for me. So I would wake up in the
morning, My mom would have a breakfast.
(33:27):
It's Colorado. She would have my parka in the
dryer so that it would be warm. My dad would be outside scraping
the snow off the car. So I knew in my mind that
literally all I had to do was show up and they were going to
support me every way they could around me just showing up and
doing my best. And that was really throughout
(33:47):
our entire careers. Like I understood that this was
my dream and my goal and no one else could do that for me.
Like I was the only one that wasin control of that outcome, but
I had so much help and support in making that outcome possible.
Yeah. And that's super powerful and
just such a great message. And again, a great lesson for
(34:07):
all of us parents. Like I've woken my kids up to go
to practice, right? I'm sitting like, we've all done
it. Well, maybe not all your parents
didn't, but we all do it. And you know, it just it's, it's
such a really powerful message and really good perspective that
at the end of the day, while we can be supportive and we can
help and we can guide, it is thekids journey.
We're having a lot of coaches, alot of these travel ball
(34:29):
coaches, even school coaches that are starting at a young age
to get to these young athletes and say, hey, if you don't pick
basketball, if you don't pick football or baseball or soccer,
you're going to fall behind. And I think there's a lot of
kids that are feeling that pressure.
Like, did you have any coach at any point, whether it was in
high school or even earlier in middle school, or did you have
(34:51):
any coaches that you had to go home and talk to your mom and
dad and say, hey, coach, so and so is trying to get me to just
play basketball or just play football?
Did you have to fight that, likecoming up in your day?
Definitely, yeah, I definitely did.
You know, I had a lot of guru ortrainers or people who are
expertise, you know, at at thesethings who are trying to put
(35:13):
pressure on you. And I, and I think to be honest
with you, if I could be frank, Ithink it's a money grab and I
think it's a, it's a finesse because at the end of the day,
like my dad, at least he would always be honest with me.
Like I play multiple sports, is what he was saying.
Like I think it's very helpful. So it was great.
I was grateful to have, you know, my dad there to help me in
that aspect at that age. And my mom, she wasn't very like
(35:37):
sportsy, but she she was also very, very, very, you know, hard
on us about our morals and our standard of a family.
And one of our standards was, you know, if you start
something, you finish it. So I wasn't going to start to
play baseball and then I finish it, you know.
So I would say, you know, to those people who are going
through those pressures, I mean,you know, you have to really,
(36:01):
really dive deep into like, whatis the the benefits?
So what I used to do is write pros and pros and cons list.
So I would write pros if I stayed in the sport and cons if
I left the sport or if I stayed in the sport.
So both ways. And I think that's something
that it is important, you know, that we have to do is, you know,
put those pros and cons together.
(36:23):
But yeah, I, I, I wouldn't, I wouldn't dive deep into those
ideas that this would make you far behind.
And like, I think they, they're still kids, you know what I
mean? You're still developing not only
as a athlete, but as a as a person and as a human being.
And I think if if your goal is to be a professional athlete at
(36:44):
567, you know, preteen, you know, like that, that to my
opinion, that shouldn't be a goal.
The goal should be being a better person, being a better,
being better at discipline, learning teammate etiquette,
learning sportsmanship. Like these are the things that I
know, Greg, you can probably admit to this as well.
(37:05):
These are things that got me to the NFL.
Like if you have the talent, thetown's going to going to show
every year in it throughout, like you'll be fine.
It's those things that keep you around in my opinion.
So those are the things I would say like don't, don't put
pressure on the aspect of makingit right away like that.
That shouldn't be the standard, the standard.
(37:26):
It should be a better in every little thing as a person before,
you know, being a professional athlete.
Yeah, it's so well said. We we we've said on this show a
few times, if the goal of youth sports is to be a pro, then
everybody should just stop doingit because because it it's not
worth it. You know, there's not enough
kids that are going to go pro tomake the investment across the
(37:47):
board at a young age. It's all about the growth, it's
about the development, it's about all the traits, everything
that you're talking about. So we couldn't agree with you
more. And to the parents out there
whose kid is not that high, highlevel elite athlete and the time
on task, especially in a sport like baseball, is there only
chance of with making the Charlotte Christian football
baseball team or the whatever team down in Atlanta like some
(38:09):
of these really competitive teams, If I don't do it all year
round, I'm not going to be able to keep up.
What would you say to those people who give that reason for
why they just pick one sport? So this would be my argument,
right? And you know this because of how
good you are in football. So we had guys on our baseball
team that played year round in high school.
(38:30):
They didn't play football. You know, we probably had seven
or eight guys doing both sports.And they play travel ball all
through the fall. And we would step back in in
January in the cages. And by two weeks, I was 10 times
better than every one of these kids that had played all fall.
And so my, my devil's advocate with that to be Greg, you either
(38:51):
have it or you don't. Like I, I find it hard to
believe that kids could play year round.
And that's the only way I can goplay baseball at NC State,
right? Like I just, I'm like, there's
kids that are either going to bereally good and you can go to
that next level or there's goingto be kids.
And maybe there's a kid every once in a while that has to
(39:12):
work, work, work, work and can do it.
But I just find too like, what about what about the memories
you want to look back from? You know what I'm saying?
Like, I feel like you go to a high school, go out there and
you can say, man, those two kidshave a chance to play in the
NFL. That that kid or one of those
two kids, they got a chance to maybe get drafted and make their
way. Everybody else is just going to
(39:33):
be great high school players andthat's OK.
Which is great. Which is, that's what I'm
saying. That's the whole idea.
So that's my, that's what I fight back is like usually if
you, if you're smart enough as aparent, you can look at your
kid. If you truly look at your kid
and don't have blinders on and all those things and say, you
know what, my kid has a legit chance.
(39:56):
And my dad always says, like, I knew you were a great baseball
player. But going into my senior year, I
went on the USA trials. I made the team.
We went to Cuba for three weeks.I was on the US junior national
team. We lost to Cuba in the
championship, 2 to one. It was incredible.
Fidel Castro was sitting right behind home plate.
Like it was amazing down there. And I got home and that was the
(40:19):
first time, first time I ever heard my dad say, you know, I
think you got a chance at this thing that was going into my
senior year, not in 8th grade, not in even 9th or 10th grade.
Like, you know, I was a great high school player, but I'd
never really stacked up against the rest of the country.
And so that was like what I always say now that these kids
(40:40):
in 8th grade you got, I just don't buy that, man.
I don't buy it. I believe that you can go play
football for five months and I believe you can go play baseball
for five months and be really good.
Now, you might have to do extra work, right?
Like you might have to go in December and January over
Christmas like I did with my dadand hit in the cages and get
yourself ready. But if if you're prepared to do
(41:02):
that work to both play both sports.
And you said something on our podcast 2 weeks ago that I think
we've played it 10 times alreadyand it resonates so good with
me. If you have a high school coach
telling you you can only play 1 sport, run for the hills man.
Like that is not your coach. I couldn't agree more and and
the thing I love that you said, I think so much of this
(41:23):
generation's kids are so worriedabout the outcome, right?
I want to go to college, I want to play varsity.
I want to be a pro like whateverthat the the ultimate end goal
of the journey is where all the attention is.
And what we're seeing not only here locally that we see with
our own two eyes, but it's goingon around the country is we got
kids that are going to graduate from high school and played at
(41:44):
three different high schools andfive different travel ball
teams. And they're going to go to three
different colleges. And then one day, unless they
become the World Series MVP and unless they go on to have like
an incredible professional career in whatever sport, the
only thing you have left are those core memories.
The only thing you have left is that Friday night game with your
(42:05):
buddies that you can talk about,you know, in the hot tub at down
in Mexico. Like, that's all you're going to
have. But if we don't focus on
creating those core experiences and those core memories, you're
pinning the entire journey on the outcome being the ultimate
desired outcome, which is to be a professional athlete.
And the likelihood of that happening is so small that for
(42:26):
99 plus percentage of these kidstaking on this journey in
today's environment, they're notgoing to be pros.
You're down in Miami, you're recruiting the PBR National kind
of showcase world that's going on.
I want to dive into some of the youth baseball things.
I don't want to see issues, but just the youth baseball reality
that is playing out that I'm sure is very different.
(42:46):
And you live it every single day.
But whether I'm sitting in your team meeting at Tennessee or I'm
a high school kid or a grad transfer kid or whoever it is
and you're recruiting me, like who are you trying to recruit?
Like give us an idea of the the ultimate target, the ideal
recruit to come to the University of Tennessee to try
to win Tony, win national championships with you.
(43:07):
Like who is that kid? Yeah, and that's kind of a
variation of the question we often get at the at the park.
It'll be, you know, like a, a mom.
Hey, I don't want to bother you.So you're watching the game, but
what are you guys looking for? And, you know, there is no magic
answer other than what you just said.
You're looking for someone that can help you win.
So if we backtrack it a little bit, what kind of resume does
(43:28):
that individual have? Now our scholarships are
changing and things like that. But like, for instance, do you
have good grades? Because if you can, you can get
an academic scholarship or at the very least, we know you're
going to be eligible and you're going to be organized and then,
you know, so on and so forth. And a guy might be just blazing
fast, you know, was joking aboutHester there, but a guy could be
crazy. He would.
Have been a good base dealer. Yeah, no doubt.
(43:51):
He's got hot side all day. No doubt, no doubt.
I feel like he was that guy thatyou knew he was supposed to be
fast, but until you saw it in real time, you, you couldn't
catch up. And that's why he was able to to
surprise some people even in a Super Bowl kickoff.
It was fun to watch. But you know, if you're fast,
maybe you get a little leeway from a scout on the hitting
(44:13):
tool. So the bottom line is you want
your resume to be as strong as possible.
So one kid, yeah, you might end up on Twitter hitting a big
Homer because, you know, you captured that moment and you
have power. But what about the other 20 at
bats that weren't captured on Twitter where they strikeouts?
Are you struggling to put the ball in play?
So I feel like the better resumeyou have, the more attractive
(44:36):
you are to us. And then it'll I'm jumping into
playing time stuff. Guys that are in college need to
be able to come in to me, not have their parents or agent
reach out about playing time. And if you come into the office,
you better bring your resume with you.
Not literally, but figuratively speaking, say, hey, this is like
in the weight room, I'm our bestworker.
Or, you know, I realize I'm not our best hitter, but on defense
(45:00):
I can do this, this and this. So it's important for kids to to
be well-rounded.
Youth. Sports in America are at a
crossroads, and I'm here to helplead the conversation forward
I'm Greg Olson. Each week we're sitting down
with top athletes, coaches and more to talk about what's
working, what's broken and what's next.
Welcome to you think, but I wantto read a quote A wise man once
said, I encourage everyone to play football for the simple
(00:22):
reason that it is hard. And I think I, I want to start
there because I think it's a really, if anyone doesn't know,
Tom is the one who said that it,it's AI.
Just think it really paints the picture into just your entire
approach, just the way you view things, the way you went after
things, not only in your career,your post career, your business
ventures. Where did that mindset?
(00:43):
Where did that mindset of embracing difficult challenges
and pushing through the hard? Like where did that all start
for you? I think the interesting part is,
is the journey of football for me started at a young age, but I
wasn't probably the, the typicalkid that you think would, would,
would reach, you know, 23 seasons in the NFL and to be a
(01:04):
part of 7 championship teams. I didn't play Pop Warner
football. It really wasn't available where
I grew up and when I started playing, I was a freshman in
high school. We had three teams at our
school, the freshman team, the JV team and the varsity team.
I started on the freshman team, but I didn't even start.
I started playing as a freshman,but I was the backup quarterback
(01:26):
on our freshman team and we wereO and seven to start my freshman
career. I fell in love with the sport
because the 49ers. I didn't know how to put pads in
my pants at that age. I was looking around on all the
other kids the. Kids.
Still don't. If it makes you feel any better,
the kids still don't know how. OK, good.
Thank God, because I was lookingaround like how, how, how do I
put the the butt pad in and the back can't even see it and you
(01:48):
got to put it on the loop through the pad.
It was a disaster. And I just remember getting out
on the field and I of course, I'd watch football growing up
and I was, but I never played it.
And then you heart start hearingall the play calls and what do I
do on a pinch stunt and on a, you know, how am I going to play
linebacker? Well, thankfully I couldn't play
linebacker. They, they found me at
(02:08):
quarterback, but because I had adecent arm, but I didn't really
play. And I'll make a Long story
short, it was a, it was a struggle for me and people
wouldn't see this now, but my second year is on.
I played junior varsity and I ended up winning the starting
job because the guy was the freshman quarterback quit and we
were OK that year, but I really fell in love with the sport.
And then my third and fourth year I started on varsity and I
(02:30):
got lightly recruited to Michigan and ended up choosing
there because I thought, OK, I was a bit naive of how hard it
actually would be. But I was like, you know, if I
want, if you want to be the best, you got to beat the best.
But of course, I was nowhere in the realm physically or mentally
or emotionally where a lot of these other kids were when they
arrived at campus of Michigan. I was, there were six other
(02:51):
quarterbacks ahead of me at Michigan when I started, started
and I fought my whole career, college career to, to end up
getting to start. And I started my 4th and 5th
year and there was a lot of struggles along the way.
And I would say I had a good college career.
It wasn't great. I thought I'd be a second or
third round pick in the NFL because I developed and I was
(03:14):
very much like Bloomer. And then I got picked by the
Patriots at 199 and then was the4th quarterback on the depth
chart when I started at the Patriots.
So I guess my point in saying this is I really valued when I
did get a chance to play as a starter, I really valued where I
was at because it was hard for me.
(03:35):
And every step along the way wasa challenge for me to get from
one year to the next, to get from the freshman team to the
junior varsity team, the junior varsity team to the senior team,
this the, the varsity team to the, the college team.
And in, in my red shirt freshmanyear was hard and everything
about it was a challenge, but I really valued it and I knew that
OK. And I always said this thing,
(03:57):
well, if they put me on the field, Tommy, they're never
going to take you off. And fortunately for me and, and
it was tough situation for Drew,but he got injured in his second
year. And when I remember running on
the field, I felt I was really prepared because I knew how to
compete. And I, I ran out on my field in
the second year. I think I was 24 years old and I
(04:17):
basically played for for 21 straight seasons after that.
And every step along the journeyfor those 21 years was a
challenge. And I think when I referenced
how hard it was, it was never something that to me, you could
just, hey, let's just roll my helmet on field.
I think you and I both played with players like that, that
they're really talented as youth.
(04:39):
They never really learn how to develop a great work ethic.
And I'm not saying they don't work hard.
I'm just don't say they don't work as hard as they could
possibly work. They work to a level of their
comfort and then they don't. They're competitive, but they
never have to be ultra competitive because they're
physically just a lot better than everybody else.
So I think just some of those teachings and learnings that I
(05:03):
had ended up being great blessings in my life.
It was a blessing that it was hard and I think for.
For no, sorry, go ahead, go ahead.
No go. Ahead.
No, I just think it's a blessingwhen it is hard because you
there were so many times along the way where I thought, man,
maybe it should be easier than this.
Or maybe I should go take a easier route.
Maybe I should go to a lesser competitive school than
(05:23):
Michigan. You know, that was one.
Maybe I should quit football because that would have been
easier in high school. But I look back and I go, you
know what? I'm so happy I didn't because it
it built up a level of determination and resilience in
me that was able to transcend decades in professional sports.
And when we think of the great players and not everyone's going
(05:44):
to be a great player, but whether you want to be a great
player in life, you want to be agreat athlete in life, you want
to be a great member of your family, You want to be a great
member of your community. You want to do great in your in,
in your office job. Well, you better be a great
teammate and you better learn toovercome the things that don't
go your way. Because a lot of times the
things that don't go on your way, if you look at them as a
(06:07):
blessing and you learn from it and you get more determined for
it and more resilient than it will be a blessing.
And that will carry you a lot further in life than something
that's given to you. So many young coaches that I see
focus so much about how much do I know about the sport, right?
I'm a young high school footballcoach.
Everything's XS and OS. I'm a young basketball coach, a
(06:27):
baseball coach. I want you to talk about the
role of a coach, but not becauseyou draw the best offensive
plays or you've got the best no huddle offense or tell me in
your mind like the role of the best coaches you've been around,
whether that's guys on your staff or guys you coached under
or like, just give an idea of like in your mind championship
(06:47):
coaching is what? That's a great question.
I, I, I wish I could, I wish that my, my staff could hear
this right now. Because you're really.
Boiling this down to what reallymatters the most at any level, I
think the first thing is you teach, you know, sometimes I
want to even say to our coaches,slow down.
(07:08):
Just talk to this young man, coach him.
Ask him what what is he seeing? What is he thinking?
What is going through his mind? What is he looking at?
What is he seeing? You know, we always just like
you said, want to go on to the next play or, you know, just so
you know, want to coach him hard.
And we do. We all have to coach hard.
But like sometimes we just need to like talk to them and teach
(07:29):
them. Now we're not going to coach
effort. We're not going to coach focus
like that, that that's somethingthat is a whole another
conversation. But if you have guys who are
willing to give great effort, willing to focus you, you have
to teach them. And then you have to drill those
things that you're doing. And then you have to build up
this foundation. You know, we're we have this
book. I got it right here that we're
(07:50):
we're reading as a team. It's called chop wood carry
water and it's a great book. And each each chapter is only
like about a 45 second read. It's really quick.
And So what we did as a team this summer is every day we had
a player get up and summarize what the chapter meant.
And so we had it on the, on the indoor, on the indoor, we had it
(08:10):
on the, the monitors in the building.
And everybody had to kind of read that.
And then we'd pick them out. So somebody would have to read
and explain what that was. And to me, like it's, it's the,
it's, it's, that is a great bookbecause it's all about the
process over the results. Like you're constantly working
on the process and you know, like, for instance, one of the
(08:30):
chapters talks about how every inch matters, every decision
that you make matters. If you eat McDonald's today,
you're not going to get fat and overweight and sick.
But if you eat it every single day, eventually that's going to
happen. Like who you hang out with.
You know, what you listen to, what time you wake up in the
morning, what you eat, what you focus on, all those things add
up in the end. And when you're focusing on that
(08:53):
process, when, when you when youfail, it's a good thing.
Like, how do you grow? You grow by failing.
You grow by, you know, first goton a bike, what happened?
You fell off. But how quickly can you learn
from those failures along the way?
But when I watch youth sports today, I, I gotta tell you, like
I watch parents who are screaming and yelling and care
if, if a team wins a fifth gradebasketball game like that,
(09:14):
that's not it. It's about the process.
Are we actually getting better at the skills that we need to
move on and grow from? And and and that doesn't really
even change when we get to college.
It's the same things like we have to focus on that.
And to your point, you know, we've had games in the past, you
know, the 22 game against Georgia, we miss a field goal in
(09:34):
the semi finals. And if not, we'll go on to T
against TCU and probably win thenational championship.
Same thing in in in 19. Like we've been a player 2 away
from winning a championship. But the focus has to be on the
process, not the result, becauseyou know, there's a lot of
things that can happen in a game.
So I. I covered a lot of ground,
right? There, but to me important
points. No, I love it.
(09:55):
It's like the old adage, right? How you do some things is how
you do everything great. We, we try to tell our our kids
that we coach. I just had a 7th and 8th grade
for our middle school football team.
We just had our summer workout this morning, 8:00 AM.
We're out there and we preach itlike our brain doesn't know
whether this is a random Wednesday in July or if this is
the fourth quarter and against our bitter rival for the last
(10:16):
game of the season. We we can't decide when it's
time to turn it on. When it's time, does it matter?
It doesn't matter. Our brains don't know the
difference. And the idea of building those
processes in those routines. You're so spot on.
I want. To show I don't want to cut you
off for one second because I think this is important.
I I think and and having three young kids who are in sports
(10:36):
and, and seeing them and then seeing their peers is like not
everybody has the same. Burn as the other and.
When you you start to move towards, you know, the higher
levels of competition, sometimesyou need to identify like, who
has that burn, like you had thatburn and like attaching yourself
(10:58):
to that burn to understand what puts 2 feet on the ground every
day for you to want to be great because not everybody's wired
that way. Now, a part of that is a coach.
Like if you have guys on the team who aren't that wired that
way, how do you motivate them towant to become the best versions
of themselves? And so there, there's two
conversations there. One, you, you want to have those
people who are just wired that way.
(11:20):
Then the other part is like, howdo you motivate those that are
around who maybe aren't that wired that way to be the best
versions of themselves? Through positivity and
encouragement. Will Howard was the most
positive leader I've ever been around.
I learned a lot from him becausesometimes I can be negative.
He would always make people think they could do more than
they could. He was tremendous that way and I
learned a lot from him. That was his leadership style.
(11:42):
But the people that you're around who want to be great, and
I see young kids like, I say it to my my daughters all the time.
Like, if you don't want this, don't do it.
Like if you don't want to, then go find a sport, find an
instrument to play, go become the best musician or or you
know, do something else. Be an artist.
Like find what you love and yourpassion and then grab onto it.
(12:03):
I think sometimes parents want it more than the kids.
Like they have to find their love and their passion and then
they'll own it, and then they'rethe ones that'll wake up earlier
than you. I think parenting is really hard
on its own and it gets really hard when you start, uh,
comparing yourself to other parents.
And that's the really difficult part of like having to be like,
hey, my kid is my kid. They're going to do things at
(12:24):
their speed and they're going todo things that they want to do.
And you can't compare to other. Like some of my friends would be
like, Oh yeah, my kid it, you know, 4 wanted to play, had a
bat in his hand. Like you said, like being like,
I want to go play and I and, andlike it's, it's just human
nature to then compare your yourchild, but you have to stop
yourself and be like, no, that'snot my kid is going to be his
(12:48):
own person and he's going to do things at his speed and just
finding that balance because you're right.
Like right now I do have to to somewhat force him to do things.
And the, and the, the craziest thing is that you know, this
like I'll, my, my son will not want to go to Taekwondo.
And then we'll go and he'll havethe best time, of course.
And, and at the end he'll be like, that was awesome.
(13:08):
Like I broke a board. I got a new belt, all that
stuff. Like he was so happy when he
got, when he went up a level in the belt.
And I was just like, yeah, see, this is, I wish I could bottle
this up and remind you every time we're in the car after
school and being like, you want to go to Taekwondo and you're
like, no, I don't want to go. It's like, remember that moment.
But it's hard because he's 6. You know, it's hard for six year
(13:28):
olds to, to, to, to understand that and, and like future plans.
So like the comparison thing is really, really difficult.
And I'm sure it gets even more difficult as you get as your
kids get older and every, you know, it gets a little more
competitive and trying to tryingto navigate that where you don't
want to be the overbearing dad who's not only pushing him too
(13:50):
hard, but also still bragging too much about like what your
kid is doing to a point where you're you now become the person
you don't like. No doubt.
And I and I think you bring up areally good point because there
is an element that again, we're,we're all bias, right?
We we all parent our kids to similar to our upbringing and
similar to our experiences and the things that we love.
(14:11):
We want our kids to love. We want to share the we want to
go to the Cubs game and have your kid be a die hard Cubs fan
and sit in Wrigley and tell you the batting lineup and like
every dad dreams of that with their kid, that you know, your
kid loves football because that's what we love.
That's what we grew up loving. We grew up watching it.
And everyone wants to share those experiences with their
kids. So there is that element where
(14:33):
you have to you. I don't know how to teach my kid
to go fishing. I don't know how to teach my kid
to join the band, the orchestra.If they were interested in it, I
would love it. I'd be in the front row at the
recital and I'd be all in if they were all in.
But I only know what I know and I only know what I enjoy doing.
So I guess we all are, selfishlyor biasedly, whatever you want
(14:55):
to say, kind of push our kids totry to enjoy things that we
enjoy because there is an element to how cool would it be?
Yeah, I love going to Cubs games, but how cool would it be
if, like, me and my kid grew up going there and he was also a
die hard fan? Like right or wrong, that's in
all of our brains, like, and I don't know how we fight that.
(15:18):
It's, it's really hard. I, my kids have been, I have
season tickets to the Cubs. My kids have been to like 10
games this year and I think my daughter has watched like 2
pitches. You know, she goes because we
can get a hot dog and a pretzel.And, but I, I like going and I,
I think they understand that I like going.
But like there's times where I'mlike, you guys don't even
understand how, how nice it is. You've been to 10 games this
(15:40):
year. You know, we're halfway through
the summer. You've been to 10 games like so,
but they're, they're still so young.
And then the other thing I struggle with, and this is where
it started on PMT is like, I do want to coach them.
I want to be involved in that way, but I also don't want to do
it too early where I think it's hard for kids where like if your
(16:01):
dad is coaching you when you're 6, when you're 7, you start
thinking about your, you know, it's just a different
relationship. So it's like, when do I enter
that? Like I would love to, you know,
coach, you know, my son playing basketball, but I also don't
want to be at a, he's at a, he'sat a age right now where if I'm
at the practice, like it's goingto be me like telling him to pay
(16:23):
attention. And I don't want to do that, you
know what I mean? Because that's, that's kind of,
I have to do that at home. And I don't want to have to do
that when we're, when we're out,you know, doing something that's
supposed to be fun with all his friends.
So trying to find that balance of when I get involved and how
much I get involved. And maybe it's, I don't get
involved at all, but it's, it's,it's, it's, it's very difficult
(16:46):
because I do want them to like the things I like.
And you're exactly right. Like you in a dream world, it's
like they become a mini me. But that's not going to be
reality. You know, they have to like
their own things. Of course you didn't.
You missed practice the day before the game.
Why do you expect to have a goodgame?
Like trying to get them to understand that while not
everything is in their control, a lot of things are in their
(17:09):
control. And let's put all of our focus
and effort into that because we're so worried about the
outcome. We're so worried about how many
hits we got or how many catches we had or how many sacks we
made. And I think it's so easy now,
especially raising these kids intoday's world with highlight
reel culture. Like it's very easy to lose
track of the journey. It's very easy to lose track of
(17:29):
teaching the process because everybody coaches to the
scoreboard, everybody coaches tothe highlight reel.
They coach to the Instagram clipand I think it's a big reason
why youth sports has gone off the rails a little bit is
because we do ignore everything we've talked about up to this
point, everything you just laid out.
I think for a lot of kids aroundthe country, that approach has
(17:50):
really been lost. I would agree with you.
And I got to be honest, like forsomebody listening or, you know,
who might have a kid that you think could play college
football or, you know, in the pros or, you know, get a
scholarship for some Olympic sport, whatever.
It is these very things that I'msure this resonates with you.
But like, it's not just going to, it's not just going to be
(18:11):
how your kid plays youth sports.It's going to be how your kid
does everything as an adult and you only get one shot at it.
And, you know, people can changeas they get older and people can
mature in their 20s. We've had teammates who, you
know, show up and they're super talented, but like that they're
just, they don't give a whatever.
And, you know, sometimes they change more often than not,
(18:33):
though, like people are who theyare in their 20s and 30s and
that sort of thing. And so like, if it weren't for
the things that the process oriented, the process centering
mindset, I don't think I'd have been able to get through eight
years in Saint Louis. You know, and, and I think, you
know, what I'm talking about is like, you know, we're one of 14,
seven and 96 and 10. And so like having won in the
(18:55):
NFL at the tail end of my career, I look back and I'm
like, how'd you do that? Well, I did it because all I
cared about was when somebody turns on the tape, do I give
great effort? Do I control what I can control?
I don't know how many times I heard my dad say as a pro,
control what you can control. And it's the same things we're
talking about that you're sayingto your 1213 year old son or
(19:16):
daughter. And when you are an adult and
mom and dad can't help you in the real world, you have to have
those things instilled in you soyou only get one shot at it.
I'm going to err on the side of my kid being tough mentally and
and hard working, yeah. We're going to be tough as hell
physically, mentally, and you'regoing to compete your ass off
(19:38):
and everything that you do and you're going to have a great
attitude. You're going to treat your
teammates good. Like all that stuff is so
teachable. We can't control if they're 6-7.
We can't control if they one or 45 there is good.
You know what's funny? Speaking of vignette touch dude,
first of all. Really all done my younger son.
I can't even say the number six without him yelling 7 at.
(20:00):
Me, it's off the board. He's like how, you know, it's
funny. He's like Burnell Washington.
I'm like, he's 68. You know, I lie now I just lie.
I just make up things. But you know what's so funny
about it is before this became like a thing, I don't know if I
realized how many times we all actually say, I don't know, like
(20:20):
6 or 7. Like it's such a common freeze.
Like I don't I don't get it. But I hear it all the time.
But now I find myself like mid sentence being like it's like 6,
it's 9. But just Gee, please don't be.
I don't want to be watching a game.
And by the way, you're the best.We love watching you call games.
Dude, you're just I've told you this, but you're you're
(20:42):
incredible at it. Appreciate it.
And so is my brother Kyle, by the way.
I think he's making up there with you one day.
I'm hoping but but if I catch you doing the six seven thing,
I'm going to turn the TV. Off.
You're not going to catch me. I don't do gimmicks.
I don't do gimmicks. No, you don't.
That's why I left. I don't do gimmicks.
That was an inadvertent teach mehow to be a girl sports dad
(21:03):
because I only know sports one way.
And, like, I get into these arguments with parents at school
and I'm like, these girls are fine.
Like, they can be coached. We can hold them to high
standards. We don't need to baby them.
Like, yeah, what do we do? Am I crazy?
Like, help me be a better girl dad in sport?
Well, I guess just a girl dad ingeneral, but a girl dad who's
(21:25):
now trying to help a young daughter navigate, you know,
middle school sports at the moment.
Yeah, well, and and I think it'sit's where your kid is too,
right. Like every kid is different.
Like for example, my daughter inhigh school did not want mom and
dad, who played a lot of soccer,to have any feedback and given
(21:47):
to her. And so we were like, well, OK,
like, but we can help you, you know?
That's a hard one to. Swap, Yeah.
And you're like, we, but like we've kind of played and, and my
husband coached at a high level.And so it was like, we kind of
know this sport a little bit. Don't you want to like a little
bit of information? And she's like, no more
(22:08):
information. And so we honored that.
And it wasn't until her like senior year in high school, she
was like, OK, I'm ready. I'm ready now for information
because I realized I need to catch up on stuff, right?
And then she wanted to to grow. And I mean, she always wanted to
grow, but I think it gets to a point where it's like, I just
don't want any more information and I just want to play and all
that. So I think it's where your kid
(22:30):
is in terms of what they're feeling of the volume and the
amount of information that they're willing to absorb and
honoring that, right? But I also think, yes, I mean,
that was the thing I loved aboutthe national team is like, I was
around a bunch of competitive women that it was OK to push
(22:51):
them in a way that was like really healthy.
And I was like, hell yes, I'm around people now that like
understand like I don't, I don'twant to be baby and I want I
want to play, I want to compete.I want to do these things.
I want to win. I want to win and I don't I
don't, I don't need to hide the fact that I want to win because
this is like all these women around me understand that.
So I do not need think you need to baby them.
(23:14):
I agree with that. But I think the, the problem we
have, and not just inherent to the women's side of the game,
but with youth sports, is that, as Abby was saying, you know,
my, my biggest take away, I havea son who's 16 and now daughter
who's playing at Oregon in her first year as a freshman 18 year
old, is that we, we have a tendency as parents with the
(23:38):
best of intentions to just suck the joy out of it because we are
trying to, as Abby mentioned, figure it out for ourselves.
Like we want our kids to have scholarships.
We want our kids again, with thebest of intentions.
We want them to be successful inthe sport.
And so we push and we train and we have them, you know, think,
(23:58):
you know, just singular sports and, you know, and specify and,
and they end up doing just one sport rather than trying
different sports. So I, I, when, when we talk
about youth sports, I, I don't talk about the kids.
I talk about the parents becausethey're the ones and the coaches
who are dictating the experience.
And we have to our North Star has always been with our family.
(24:22):
Like, do you like it? Like, do you even enjoy it?
And if you don't enjoy it, why are you doing it?
And the parent has to then framethat for them to their behavior
on the sidelines. The way you're talking to a kid
about their goals and expectations, the way we're
talking to them about like, you know, I had a daughter who was
(24:43):
like, so worried that her coach would punish her because she
wanted to go to prom. I'm like, go to prom, like go do
your dances, like go have fun inlife.
Like there will be more games, there will be more tournaments.
We don't have to miss every family vacation because you're
worried about a tournament or a showcase or like like that
(25:03):
perspective from a parent is lost.
I feel like nowadays in new sports and we got to bring that
back. Greg, can I?
Can I? Give you like 1 little tip that.
Please was like 10 tips. This is a good tip I've got.
I got a lot of tips, but one really good tip around the
difference between coaching a young young woman, young girl
(25:25):
versus a young boy, young young man is when when a coach or a
parent is talking to a group in a lot, Let's just say we're in a
locker room and a coach is talking to the team.
If the coach says, you know, oneof you out there is just like
really sucking it up, you're notworking as hard as you need to
do. A group of boys will think, Oh
(25:46):
my God, he's talking to this guyout here.
He's not talking to me. And a group of girls, a group
group of young girls think the coach is talking to them.
So we do have to approach psychologically the way that we
talk to these kids. Yes, I do think setting high
standards and maintaining those high standards is really
important. But especially with with young
(26:08):
girls, they have to, they have to set what that standard is,
right? Like having those conversations
with these young girls is like, what do you guys want out of
this season? What do you want out of your
individual accomplishments? Like what kind of goals are you
setting for yourself? Because then you can hold them
accountable to that stuff. But parents set their own goals
(26:28):
and their own standards for whatthey want for their kids and
they hold their children to thatstandard.
And the kids have not signed on to that.
They have not cosigned that dealso.
That's that is so spot on. Yeah.
Like this connection between hard work and the outcome that
you were talking about, we assume that it's either there
(26:51):
and or not. And if it's not there, we have
to like, as opposed to saying maybe this is something that
emerges slowly. I know lots of people who didn't
make that connection in other parts of their life until they
were in their 30s. I didn't, I didn't work very
hard in my 20s. You did not at writing or I I
spent the latter, the early partof my 30s essentially goofing
(27:15):
off at the Washington Post, sitting in an office in New York
watching MTV and trying to do aslittle work as possible.
I now work harder than I work harder at 61 than I did at 31.
Way harder. It just took me a long time to
figure out that there was this connection between what I
wanted. And I wonder with kids too,
where maybe we're just rushing them on this, that like, there's
(27:35):
a moment I use running an example, there's a moment as a
runner when you really begin to enjoy the connection between the
preparation and the outcome. And part of what's pleasurable
about like a nice long Saturday morning run is you're thinking,
you're already thinking in advance what that's going to
mean when I want to do somethingwith it, right?
That I didn't have that when I was 14.
(27:56):
That's a good point. I got that when I was 50.
I'm looking at it through the frame of a 40 year old who's
only. Professional athlete.
Professional athlete. For my entire life, all I've
ever known is trying to play at a high level and peak
performance and it's all so I'vealmost been trained.
And again, this started for me. I was the son of a high school
football coach who was hard, disciplined, traditional old
(28:17):
school high school football. Legendary high school we won a.
Million games, one of the most in northern New Jersey, right
outside of in Wayne, NJ, right outside the right down Route 3
and public high school won a million games.
Traditional high school, what you would think of the high
school football in the 80s, nineties, 2000s, that was my
dad. That was our program and it
(28:38):
worked. And that's where I learned all
of my habits, all of my grind. Our summer vacations for us were
going to football camps and sleeping on the floors of the
dorm like it's all I ever knew. But I also sometimes have to
check myself and say, OK, these kids don't have 40 years of the
experience in life, life experiences of high achievement
and what, they're 12? So do you, Greg, to just check
(29:00):
your orientation, Can I ask you some questions?
Yeah, just to better understand if there's a a fundamental
orientation to work from and fundamentals, a big word for me,
either I'm approaching success or I'm avoiding failure.
And so in one of those two wouldreveal a lot of somebody's
psychology. So if you if you, let's just do
(29:22):
you and you'll see how this would easily bleed into your
kids that I'm terrified of blowing it.
Go, go. When you were on the field, I
work my ass off. I work.
I was in film. I was doing everything I did my
mental image, I did all of my work so that when Sunday came, I
wouldn't blow it. Or was it more like, no, I got
something and there's a lot of good here and I want to maximize
(29:45):
this because it is so much fun to play and to play freely.
Very different orientations, very different psychological
constructs that. And when I say psychological
constructs, what a construct does is it allows the
effervescent little, small little conversations we have
with ourselves kind of filter into something that has some
weight over time. So when you played, which one
(30:08):
were you? And then how are you doing?
I would imagine you're doing it similar with your kids, not
dissimilar, but can you just open that up?
My my confidence, everything about me was routine in
preparation. I all of my insecurities, all of
my fears, all of my I don't wantto drop the ball.
I want to make like all of that.Just the natural athletic fears
of failure that were in all of our brains.
(30:31):
The only way I knew how to deal with them was I was so routine
oriented. And I knew from Monday to Sunday
morning at 1:00, if I did Monday's routine, Tuesday all
the way through when that ball was kicked off on Sunday, there
was nothing more that I could have done.
I did my entire routine, all my habits from physical body work
(30:53):
to catching to my practice habits, to my workouts.
To talk a little bit more about your parents and your upbringing
and how you guys found the balance between growing up as a
young girl in Colorado and having friends and having
sleepovers and playing, you know, just being a normal kid.
But then also recognizing like, listen, we can harness a really
unique gift and, and the desire to pursue it.
(31:16):
That there is an opportunity. There is a path that you need
for Missy that is not the same path for everybody else.
We can find. We can pursue that with great
intent without sacrificing the other side.
Like how did they do it? As you look back now as a mom,
like, what is your reference of,like, the job they did
protecting you, keeping you innocent, but also keeping you
(31:39):
driven and on course to achieve what you did?
Yeah. Well, I'll talk about them for
an hour. So.
So just buckle up. But my parents are my best
friends. I mean, they are the two most
incredible people that I know. And the more I have grown
becoming a mom, I just have become more in awe of what they
did because at the time when I was that young, right, I didn't
(32:01):
realize that this was their first time too.
Like they always seem so calm and in control that it was like,
oh, they know what they're doing.
And I look back now and I'm like, they had no idea what they
were doing. And now being a mom, I'm like I.
Don't know what I'm doing. They didn't know what they were
doing. Of course, I don't know what I'm
doing. Like we just don't know.
We don't know. But they never ever made me feel
(32:22):
like that. And I, I think I just, I have so
much respect for them. But Greg, I think one thing that
was so important with our familyand and so unique was I was very
intrinsically motivated. And I think my parents
recognized that and they let that work to my advantage.
So my dad talks a lot about being an enabler and not a
(32:43):
motivator. So they would never wake me up
for a practice because at the end of the day, yeah, sure, they
could have come in, woken me up,thrown me in the car, driven me
to practice, but I'm the one getting in the pool like it.
It was up to me whether or not Iwas going to make that practice
worthwhile or a total waste of time.
So why wake me up if that decision is ultimately mine to
(33:06):
begin with anyway? So I would be the one to wake
myself up in the morning. I would have to set my own alarm
and they wouldn't wake me up if I didn't.
But I always did You ever sleep?Did you ever sleep through a
practice? No, no.
But. On the other side, they had
everything ready for me. So I would wake up in the
morning, My mom would have a breakfast.
(33:27):
It's Colorado. She would have my parka in the
dryer so that it would be warm. My dad would be outside scraping
the snow off the car. So I knew in my mind that
literally all I had to do was show up and they were going to
support me every way they could around me just showing up and
doing my best. And that was really throughout
(33:47):
our entire careers. Like I understood that this was
my dream and my goal and no one else could do that for me.
Like I was the only one that wasin control of that outcome, but
I had so much help and support in making that outcome possible.
Yeah. And that's super powerful and
just such a great message. And again, a great lesson for
(34:07):
all of us parents. Like I've woken my kids up to go
to practice, right? I'm sitting like, we've all done
it. Well, maybe not all your parents
didn't, but we all do it. And you know, it just it's, it's
such a really powerful message and really good perspective that
at the end of the day, while we can be supportive and we can
help and we can guide, it is thekids journey.
We're having a lot of coaches, alot of these travel ball
(34:29):
coaches, even school coaches that are starting at a young age
to get to these young athletes and say, hey, if you don't pick
basketball, if you don't pick football or baseball or soccer,
you're going to fall behind. And I think there's a lot of
kids that are feeling that pressure.
Like, did you have any coach at any point, whether it was in
high school or even earlier in middle school, or did you have
(34:51):
any coaches that you had to go home and talk to your mom and
dad and say, hey, coach, so and so is trying to get me to just
play basketball or just play football?
Did you have to fight that, likecoming up in your day?
Definitely, yeah, I definitely did.
You know, I had a lot of guru ortrainers or people who are
expertise, you know, at at thesethings who are trying to put
(35:13):
pressure on you. And I, and I think to be honest
with you, if I could be frank, Ithink it's a money grab and I
think it's a, it's a finesse because at the end of the day,
like my dad, at least he would always be honest with me.
Like I play multiple sports, is what he was saying.
Like I think it's very helpful. So it was great.
I was grateful to have, you know, my dad there to help me in
that aspect at that age. And my mom, she wasn't very like
(35:37):
sportsy, but she she was also very, very, very, you know, hard
on us about our morals and our standard of a family.
And one of our standards was, you know, if you start
something, you finish it. So I wasn't going to start to
play baseball and then I finish it, you know.
So I would say, you know, to those people who are going
through those pressures, I mean,you know, you have to really,
(36:01):
really dive deep into like, whatis the the benefits?
So what I used to do is write pros and pros and cons list.
So I would write pros if I stayed in the sport and cons if
I left the sport or if I stayed in the sport.
So both ways. And I think that's something
that it is important, you know, that we have to do is, you know,
put those pros and cons together.
(36:23):
But yeah, I, I, I wouldn't, I wouldn't dive deep into those
ideas that this would make you far behind.
And like, I think they, they're still kids, you know what I
mean? You're still developing not only
as a athlete, but as a as a person and as a human being.
And I think if if your goal is to be a professional athlete at
(36:44):
567, you know, preteen, you know, like that, that to my
opinion, that shouldn't be a goal.
The goal should be being a better person, being a better,
being better at discipline, learning teammate etiquette,
learning sportsmanship. Like these are the things that I
know, Greg, you can probably admit to this as well.
(37:05):
These are things that got me to the NFL.
Like if you have the talent, thetown's going to going to show
every year in it throughout, like you'll be fine.
It's those things that keep you around in my opinion.
So those are the things I would say like don't, don't put
pressure on the aspect of makingit right away like that.
That shouldn't be the standard, the standard.
(37:26):
It should be a better in every little thing as a person before,
you know, being a professional athlete.
Yeah, it's so well said. We we we've said on this show a
few times, if the goal of youth sports is to be a pro, then
everybody should just stop doingit because because it it's not
worth it. You know, there's not enough
kids that are going to go pro tomake the investment across the
(37:47):
board at a young age. It's all about the growth, it's
about the development, it's about all the traits, everything
that you're talking about. So we couldn't agree with you
more. And to the parents out there
whose kid is not that high, highlevel elite athlete and the time
on task, especially in a sport like baseball, is there only
chance of with making the Charlotte Christian football
baseball team or the whatever team down in Atlanta like some
(38:09):
of these really competitive teams, If I don't do it all year
round, I'm not going to be able to keep up.
What would you say to those people who give that reason for
why they just pick one sport? So this would be my argument,
right? And you know this because of how
good you are in football. So we had guys on our baseball
team that played year round in high school.
(38:30):
They didn't play football. You know, we probably had seven
or eight guys doing both sports.And they play travel ball all
through the fall. And we would step back in in
January in the cages. And by two weeks, I was 10 times
better than every one of these kids that had played all fall.
And so my, my devil's advocate with that to be Greg, you either
(38:51):
have it or you don't. Like I, I find it hard to
believe that kids could play year round.
And that's the only way I can goplay baseball at NC State,
right? Like I just, I'm like, there's
kids that are either going to bereally good and you can go to
that next level or there's goingto be kids.
And maybe there's a kid every once in a while that has to
(39:12):
work, work, work, work and can do it.
But I just find too like, what about what about the memories
you want to look back from? You know what I'm saying?
Like, I feel like you go to a high school, go out there and
you can say, man, those two kidshave a chance to play in the
NFL. That that kid or one of those
two kids, they got a chance to maybe get drafted and make their
way. Everybody else is just going to
(39:33):
be great high school players andthat's OK.
Which is great. Which is, that's what I'm
saying. That's the whole idea.
So that's my, that's what I fight back is like usually if
you, if you're smart enough as aparent, you can look at your
kid. If you truly look at your kid
and don't have blinders on and all those things and say, you
know what, my kid has a legit chance.
(39:56):
And my dad always says, like, I knew you were a great baseball
player. But going into my senior year, I
went on the USA trials. I made the team.
We went to Cuba for three weeks.I was on the US junior national
team. We lost to Cuba in the
championship, 2 to one. It was incredible.
Fidel Castro was sitting right behind home plate.
Like it was amazing down there. And I got home and that was the
(40:19):
first time, first time I ever heard my dad say, you know, I
think you got a chance at this thing that was going into my
senior year, not in 8th grade, not in even 9th or 10th grade.
Like, you know, I was a great high school player, but I'd
never really stacked up against the rest of the country.
And so that was like what I always say now that these kids
(40:40):
in 8th grade you got, I just don't buy that, man.
I don't buy it. I believe that you can go play
football for five months and I believe you can go play baseball
for five months and be really good.
Now, you might have to do extra work, right?
Like you might have to go in December and January over
Christmas like I did with my dadand hit in the cages and get
yourself ready. But if if you're prepared to do
(41:02):
that work to both play both sports.
And you said something on our podcast 2 weeks ago that I think
we've played it 10 times alreadyand it resonates so good with
me. If you have a high school coach
telling you you can only play 1 sport, run for the hills man.
Like that is not your coach. I couldn't agree more and and
the thing I love that you said, I think so much of this
(41:23):
generation's kids are so worriedabout the outcome, right?
I want to go to college, I want to play varsity.
I want to be a pro like whateverthat the the ultimate end goal
of the journey is where all the attention is.
And what we're seeing not only here locally that we see with
our own two eyes, but it's goingon around the country is we got
kids that are going to graduate from high school and played at
(41:44):
three different high schools andfive different travel ball
teams. And they're going to go to three
different colleges. And then one day, unless they
become the World Series MVP and unless they go on to have like
an incredible professional career in whatever sport, the
only thing you have left are those core memories.
The only thing you have left is that Friday night game with your
(42:05):
buddies that you can talk about,you know, in the hot tub at down
in Mexico. Like, that's all you're going to
have. But if we don't focus on
creating those core experiences and those core memories, you're
pinning the entire journey on the outcome being the ultimate
desired outcome, which is to be a professional athlete.
And the likelihood of that happening is so small that for
(42:26):
99 plus percentage of these kidstaking on this journey in
today's environment, they're notgoing to be pros.
You're down in Miami, you're recruiting the PBR National kind
of showcase world that's going on.
I want to dive into some of the youth baseball things.
I don't want to see issues, but just the youth baseball reality
that is playing out that I'm sure is very different.
(42:46):
And you live it every single day.
But whether I'm sitting in your team meeting at Tennessee or I'm
a high school kid or a grad transfer kid or whoever it is
and you're recruiting me, like who are you trying to recruit?
Like give us an idea of the the ultimate target, the ideal
recruit to come to the University of Tennessee to try
to win Tony, win national championships with you.
(43:07):
Like who is that kid? Yeah, and that's kind of a
variation of the question we often get at the at the park.
It'll be, you know, like a, a mom.
Hey, I don't want to bother you.So you're watching the game, but
what are you guys looking for? And, you know, there is no magic
answer other than what you just said.
You're looking for someone that can help you win.
So if we backtrack it a little bit, what kind of resume does
(43:28):
that individual have? Now our scholarships are
changing and things like that. But like, for instance, do you
have good grades? Because if you can, you can get
an academic scholarship or at the very least, we know you're
going to be eligible and you're going to be organized and then,
you know, so on and so forth. And a guy might be just blazing
fast, you know, was joking aboutHester there, but a guy could be
crazy. He would.
Have been a good base dealer. Yeah, no doubt.
(43:51):
He's got hot side all day. No doubt, no doubt.
I feel like he was that guy thatyou knew he was supposed to be
fast, but until you saw it in real time, you, you couldn't
catch up. And that's why he was able to to
surprise some people even in a Super Bowl kickoff.
It was fun to watch. But you know, if you're fast,
maybe you get a little leeway from a scout on the hitting
(44:13):
tool. So the bottom line is you want
your resume to be as strong as possible.
So one kid, yeah, you might end up on Twitter hitting a big
Homer because, you know, you captured that moment and you
have power. But what about the other 20 at
bats that weren't captured on Twitter where they strikeouts?
Are you struggling to put the ball in play?
So I feel like the better resumeyou have, the more attractive
(44:36):
you are to us. And then it'll I'm jumping into
playing time stuff. Guys that are in college need to
be able to come in to me, not have their parents or agent
reach out about playing time. And if you come into the office,
you better bring your resume with you.
Not literally, but figuratively speaking, say, hey, this is like
in the weight room, I'm our bestworker.
Or, you know, I realize I'm not our best hitter, but on defense
(45:00):
I can do this, this and this. So it's important for kids to to
be well-rounded.
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