Two Porch Pirates in get in a fight on a Porch, trying to steal the same package.

Two Porch Pirates in get in a fight on a Porch, trying to steal the same package.

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
You shine down how you love seveneighteen? My friends? That makes the
time four one o seven nine kbpI and your show time for stupid stories.
St y'all all stop? Yeah youare some stories, but to you
buy steal and your steel dealers dotcom. Oh right, let's see steal

(00:20):
steal dot com. Right, itis that time of year. Man,
holy moment. Uh, let's seeappear crawling around like an animal. That's
a new exercise trend. Oh yeah, animal flow is what they call it.
Animal flow body workouts are now gaininga lot of popularity. They're supposed
to strength, strengthen your core,and help with the mobility benefits. I

(00:44):
suppose, but you know, it'sall fun of games. The cat lady
really starts smoothing around like a cat. Did they change up what animal you're
supposed to walk like? Or Oh? I don't know. I hope they
spin a wheel. Spin a wheel? Be awesome, you get a class.
I'll help about. I don't haveto walk like a bear again today,
that's just weird. I hope we'rein gorilla pose today. Yeah.
Yeah, you need to slither likea snake. Oh man, that's really

(01:12):
rough. Yeah, big wheel,spit away I kind of like that idea.
How do I hop like a rabbit? Oh man? All right,
apparently Target is now selling baby Stanleycups and TikTokers are loving them. So

(01:34):
then if you're an influencer, maybegrab you a little baby Stanley cup there
from Target. If you got kids, you can do the mother daughter package
thing. Cute. You know whatelse is cute? Fat beach day?
Fat beach Day. Yeah, there'sall kinds of events apparentities springing up cross
country and ever to fight back againstfat phobia. All right, whatever,

(01:57):
is it really even that big ofa deal or do you make that more
of a deal in your own head? I feel like that's more of the
case and not I don't ever goto the beach and point out anybody,
right, like, just shut up? Do you need a day or a
time or do you gotta draw attentionto yourself by calling it like that?
I would be pissed off that theyeven called it that. Just let me

(02:17):
go to the beach and be myself. Why do you gotta have a fat
beach day that in the name.It just sounds insulting, Like, just
how about we just go to thebeach and be normal, Like everybody else.
Yeah, but ninety nine point ninepercent of time all in their head.
Nobody else is. Nobody's paying attention. Nobody cares. All right,

(02:38):
nobody cares. There's a lot ofother things in the world people are worried
about. Nobody cares. If you'refat and on the beach, promise,
get over yourself. Just bring moreso onscreen. Yeah. I guess there's
some playful hate. Vegan billboards arepopping up in California, but they're actually

(02:58):
put up by a vegan ad group, So yeah, whatever, that's just
par for the course nowadays with themedia stuff. So they're trying to convince
you that there's vegan hate going on, Yes, but it's actually the vegan
groups they're doing it. Okay,go figure. Uh. Tesla apparently dog
mode not so dog friendly? Ohno, uh yeah, fans a furry

(03:22):
friends take heat. Even travel aboutTesla with your Paul Powell, you might
not want to leave him in thecar for a moment. Following the software
updated, fan wrote that dog modefeature might fail, So I guess they're
looking into that. Oh not goodfor the ok nine, No, not
at all. Russia unveils anti dronerobot named after a Disney character. Russia

(03:47):
has deployed a new anti drone robotnamed after Disney's rubbish collecting wall e Remember
Wall you no not Wall? Yeah? Like, oh no, while pa,
he would never do anything like that. Eagle is designed to produce an

(04:09):
invincible dome that jams aerio drone attacksand protects troops on the ground. The
machine uses electronic warfare blockers. Russianstate TV was talking about it and parent
of the latest advancement to keep Comakaziedrones away. These Kamakazi drones been pivotal
in the war for Ukraine. Iguess, dude, isn't it crazy the

(04:32):
technology now and warfare? Oh yeah, Oh it's wild man, sounds like
something Jafar would do. Not Wally, right, Scar whatever his name is?
Scar? Yeah? But while youoh no, all right? So

(04:53):
look, may need to have aconversation with your grandparents or your parents.
Is this is crazy reading this story? How often does that? Man?
This is kind of a heartbreaking skito be honest. A pair of elderly
Floridians were swindled out of four hundredthousand dollars in gold bars. Oh dude,

(05:16):
how much is a gold bar?Well, in this story, I
believe they were getting thousand thousand grambars. Seventy eight year old person.
All Man, a seventy eight yearold person from Jensen beech Orta to police
to report that he'd been he beenscammed out of one hundred and fifty four

(05:40):
thousand dollars at the receiving a callfrom a man claiming to be a rep
from Amazon now not to being toldabout, you know, the straud on
his account. The victim was transferredto a guy named Brian Alba, who
said he was an agent for theUS government and then based on the activity
there there was on his account thatI guess he was facing several warrants out

(06:06):
for his arrest. So here's aseventy eight year old man being told that
by a quote Amazon rep that hiscount has been basically hacked, and then
he gets it over to an agentof the government supposedly that says he's facing

(06:26):
warrant for his arrest. I imagineyou freaking out if you're seventy eight years
old, little bet. Yeah,a little bit, I say a lot
of it. So much so thatthis guy, this is what's crazy,
This all of a guy assured thisman that if he wanted to get out
of this, he would first haveto obtain one hundred and fifty four thousand

(06:47):
dollars cashier check and use that fundto purchase two gold bars each which way
to kilo and costing excess to seventyfive thousand dollars. So each one of
these bars seventy five plus grand weighsabout thirty five ounces each bar. So

(07:11):
apparently when he got the gold heentertained to go. The victim put the
bars in the old iPhone box,wrapped the package to make it look like
it was a gift. Alba wason the phone, This guy who's supposed
to be a government agent is onthe phone with this old man directly on
what to do. When a mandrove up, and I guess he placed

(07:33):
the package in the back seat ofa sedan when the driver rolled down his
window. So how shady is this? Oh yeah, a sedan pulls up,
guy rolls down his window. You'resupposed to just put the box in
there and you avoid being arrested.So how Amazon works people right, right,

(07:54):
right? So this scam. Theyeventually pulled this guy over and this
guy scammed. Just a funny He'sworking for another dude named Rocky, and
apparently they had like four or fiveother you know, elderly couples that were
being scammed. He had like fivepickups that day the same thing. So
these guys are out there scamming thehell out of people. Had that conversation

(08:16):
with your grandparents, your parents.You know, if anybody's trying to pay
you with gold bars or Amazon,go get a cashiers check so you can
go buy gold. It is ascam. There's no questions. That's a
scam, a terrible one. Soyeah, this guy they busted twenty one

(08:37):
years old, twenty one he wasdoing this to like four other you know
people. What a punk man.Oh don't you kill somebody like that?
Oh all right, how about this. If you're a good Samaritan and you
came across ooh, a million dollarsworth of cocaine floating off the coast of

(08:58):
floor a recreational boulder off the FloridaKeys, discovered sixty five pounds of cocaine
just floating on top of the water. Just came a bunch, just came
upon a bunch of you know,floating objects. I think they all know
there was something like, oh,twenty five packages. So twenty five packages

(09:22):
totaling sixty five pounds, all fullof cocaine, all value street by over
a million dollars was turned in andthe cops are like, thanks for a
good Samaritan. Whoa. And that'sthe stafter apparently some divers, some scuba
diverages were swimming off the Florida Keysand found twenty five kilograms of cocaine value

(09:45):
that just over a million dollars aswell. And that was like two weeks
ago. There's a lot of cocainewashing up in Florida, floating around out
there. There's a lot of cocainethat if you saw a bunch of packages
floating around and you open it,will you open it up? Oh?

(10:05):
Yeah, yeah, the curiosity wouldget the best to me, I had
one hundred percent open that up,you kidd me. I would definitely turn
it over to the cops. ButI keep it for you too, because
I just I don't do any cokes, never tried it, but just knowing
some friends, A lot of peopledo coke man, and I would just

(10:26):
be like, hey, uh,here you go, man, this is
uh you know, I guess uh. As friends would say, uh,
you don't have to buy stuff tobe concerned about it anymore. You and
your friends can have this. Butyeah, it's crazy. Twenty five different
packages floating on top of the water. Shelf life of cocaine is about twenty

(10:50):
four months according to Reddit. Whatis Reddit now? Twenty four months?
Yeah, it wouldn't, does it. I guess it loses its post.
See, I guess huh. Ihad no idea. They say that twenty
four months is assuming that its containerremains sealed and it's refrigerated, slash frozen

(11:15):
frozen. You have to freeze cocaine. I don't know if you have to,
but I think it extends the shelflife maybe. Oh all right,
well, I don't think floating thewater would be good for it. Then
somehow they do it though, accordingto this, after that it decreases its
purity. It just sort of breaksdown. Okay, all right? Anyway,

(11:39):
check out this place called Sinking Springsoutside of Reading, Pennsylvania. A
pair of ports pirates were caught onvideo basically racing the steel package seconds after
it was delivered from the home.Was crazy. It was kind of a
doorbell camera. The package is delivered, there's a FedEx delivery person walks away.

(12:01):
Not a minute later, he getsin this truck pulls out. Two
thieves arriving in two different vehicles,sprint up to get grab the package.
It's like a full on foot raceto be a porch pirate. Hey,
the Olympics are coming. Everybody's gettingin the spirit. It's like that there.
The people are basically getting a fightover who's getting a package, and

(12:26):
the family was home at the time. They were concerned for their safty.
Police investigating, but they've not caughtanybody yet. One of the porch pirates
made out of the package, whichwas a phone from AT and T,
which is kind of weird. Sosomehow it seems like they knew it was
I mean, maybe porch pirates isso bad that they're just racing. But

(12:46):
if they're following Magice, they're followingthe FedEx guy, holy moly. Yeah,
but maybe they knew it was something, you know, worth a bunch
of money. But still, canyou imagine just two people raising his steel
package off your front porch? Like, damn, did you see the one
where the delivery driver was still onthe porch and the guy comes up and

(13:07):
runs up behind him, grabs thepackage. No. Yeah, the FedEx
guy is still like putting the infoin his phone and he's like, way,
uh uh what just standing there awkwardon the porch. All of a
sudden, did he just scan itin like it was delivered? Kind of
right. They got it on doorbellcam, so there, you know.

(13:28):
It's at least damn crazy