Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's the after show decompression session, doing what they do best,
clapping their gums.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
You're on and we're all data.
Speaker 3 (00:10):
We're so yeah. So I think that we're done with
the really nasty weather because the severe thunderstorm watch wrapped up. Okay,
but overnight more thunderstorms in the area, and then tomorrow
good chance of thunderstorms and Saturday. Talk to Mark Faber
from Texas Motor Speedway yesterday and they were doing their
laps for charity on Saturday where they raise money for
(00:33):
speedway children's charities, and they're worried about the weather. They're
keeping an eye on the weather because that would definitely
impact the lapse for charity.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Well, we don't want it to mess up the race
that's coming up. May the Fourth be with you, that's true.
Speaker 4 (00:47):
And it was very early this morning when I looked
at the weather report, but at like four o'clock this
morning or so, it said tomorrow, eventually we get into
a rain chance.
Speaker 3 (00:57):
Yes, ninety percent chance. You know what part of the metroplex.
The thing is is the temperature is going to be dropping.
And you know when we have warm temperatures then it
turns colder. That's when we get the hail and the
wind and the tornado with the weather alert everybody.
Speaker 4 (01:16):
I'm already seeing photographs on social from other parts of Texas, thankfully,
that are holding up pieces of hail, people holding it
in their hands out the size of a golf ball,
A golf ball, for Christ's sake.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
I don't know. Baseball size is what scares me. That'll
knock your ass out, Yeah, like the.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
Little golf ball and the ping pong ball size. He
that can do a lot of damage to your.
Speaker 4 (01:41):
Car, probably kill you if it comes from high up enough.
Speaker 3 (01:44):
And the Yeah, what is it?
Speaker 4 (01:46):
They used to say when I was a kid, They
used to say, if you drop a penny off the
Empire State Building and it lands on somebody's head, it'll
go straight through their body.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
No, it won't. Yeah, that's not true because of and
spins it and he goes like it's flying. Now, if
you were to drop maybe a marble, that might kill them, yeah,
like a bull.
Speaker 3 (02:11):
That's just one lie they told you when you were
a kid. Of all the lies that your parents told
you when you were a kid, like if you don't
eat your vegetables or something like. My brothers were so
cruel to me when I was little and we were
in San Antonio. They told me that if I did
not duck every time we went under an overpass, that
(02:32):
the ditch boys would get me and turn me into
a Tomali ditch boy.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
They made up these.
Speaker 3 (02:37):
Ditch boys that would come out at night from the
ditches in San Antonio and they would kill little kids
or make them into Tomali's. And so every time we
went under an overpass, I was ducking.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Well. My second oldest Bessie, who's moved back here, she
used to whenever we would drive, when we went by
a cemetery, she'd go and hold her breath. I said, Bessie,
what are you doing? I don't want death dust to
go into my law death dust. I wonder where she'd
(03:09):
heard that or learned that it wasn't for me.
Speaker 3 (03:14):
You sure about that?
Speaker 2 (03:15):
I don't know. I may have said something that set
her off here, I can't.
Speaker 4 (03:19):
I can't remember which movie it is. It's one of
Kevin Smith's movies. There's a scene where there's these two
guys working at a fast food restaurant and their boy
killing time by talking about girls, and the guy goes, hey, man,
have you and your girlfriend made out or have sex yet,
And his answer was no, because her parents planted a
(03:40):
pussy troll inside of her, and I have to wait
until she's eighteen when she peas it out, Oh, then
we can have sex.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
Story that.
Speaker 4 (03:53):
He goes, well, have you fooled around or anything else?
Have you tried to do anything else? And he goes, well,
the mouth troll his name. He's like, Okay, never mind,
just forget it.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
Let's see who's on the phony Hello Bow and them
Joe a pussy troll.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
Kevin Smith's screenplay Many mean, you know, you know that
explains a lot about my seventeen to twenty three year
old years.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
See you thought that was real.
Speaker 5 (04:24):
I thought it was really. Well, it's funny because when
I finally did, when I finally did mount it, yeah
it was there was there was like a it felt
it oh never.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Yeah yeah yeah. Yeah. You're taking us down a road
we're not really ready to travel.
Speaker 5 (04:47):
And the funny, the funny thing about that is is
that every time I mean, as I'm as I'm reaching
this age and I'm not sure if BO did it,
Alan you're not there yet and Anna just doesn't apply
to females. But Bo, when I hit sixty. Yeah, I
started to really I started to to wast in my
(05:09):
mind back to the days of you know, thinking, are
their kids out there I don't know about you know, okay,
and whatever happened to this one or that one? How
many of them? Of them are the ones that got away?
And you start to then also think at the same time,
(05:31):
the ones that you really can't believe you actually nailed.
I mean they were they they had you know, third
eyeballs in the middle of their foreheads.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
Nice broke you off a piece.
Speaker 6 (05:45):
Yeah, Well, like the old the old joke about you know,
at two am, you start to just pick the remaining
bunch of the remainders in the in the litter. True.
Speaker 5 (05:58):
I mean, you know, you don't want to go home alone,
but then they are the ones that you don't want
your friends to see you with.
Speaker 4 (06:04):
Next, do you have a genuine concern that you might
have some whoops of daisy babies bumbling around out there?
Speaker 5 (06:12):
Alan, It is so much more than a concern.
Speaker 2 (06:16):
He's afraid somebody's gonna show up in his door.
Speaker 3 (06:19):
Daddy, you know, my uncle, my dad's twe brother mattuh
he and his will put specifically that whoever came forward
and said that they were his child, that they would
receive one penny, and that covered his bases. So nobody
if they came forward and said I'm his kid, then
(06:41):
they would only receive one penny. So you may want
to do that, Matt, with your last will and testament.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
Yeah, that'll go over well, won't it.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
But you know what, it's legal. So then they cannot say, oh, well,
I was his biological kid and I need to have
part of the estate.
Speaker 4 (06:58):
Right right Here's.
Speaker 5 (07:02):
That that's no that that's that's that sound advice, But
it's like there are movies written about crap like that,
you know. I mean, I'll retire. I'll be living in
my little cabin off in the woods somewhere I'll be
I'll be cooking my the the bear that I killed
with a bow and arrow, over an open.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
Flame, and there will be a knock. There will be
a knock on my cabin door, right and I'm gonna
open it up, and there's gonna be this really really
cute little girl or this really really.
Speaker 5 (07:36):
Dark looking kid, and they're gonna say, are you Matt
Paul Kano? And my answer is gonna be, who the
fuck is asking, and then and then they're gonna say
something along the lines of do you remember so and so?
And I'm gonna think to myself, ship here it comes right, Well,
(07:56):
whatever happened is so and so well so and so
you know, and then I'm I'm her child, and you
know you you're my dad, and and like I say
in the movies, of course, it's all scripted, and things
either go great or things I have to go back.
But I have been seriously thinking about this because yes,
(08:17):
to answer ales earlier question, I would be surprised if
there aren't any. My god, you.
Speaker 3 (08:26):
Know that happened to a couple of friends of mine.
One of them was an independent record promoter. I used
to call him Howie the horror Dog.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
And he had a.
Speaker 3 (08:34):
Little girl show up at his doorstep and said, you
remember so and so? Well, I'm her daughter and you're
my dad. And he had bowed he would never have kids,
never wanted kids. And I tell you what, that daughter
of his was his pride and joy. Just uh but yeah,
I used to call him Howie the horn Dog because
(08:54):
I think he had a girl on every report.
Speaker 4 (08:57):
Matt, why's your blood pressure? Now you're an older man,
and these are things you're you're thinking. I'm not going
to accuse you of overthinking, but I'm gonna tell you
you're thinking about things that could raise your blood pressure
and most importantly, are out of the realm of your control.
Speaker 5 (09:13):
You know, let me let me say this about that,
and then I will let you go. Okay, you gotta
remember you gotta remember that. Given my circumstance, and you
may remember my circumstance, there is a very good chance
that some young man is going to show up on
my doorstep and say, I'm your long lost grandson because
(09:35):
and I'm going to be able to look at him.
I already told this to Anna. I'm gonna be able
to look at him and say, well, check this out. Kid.
Before your father came along, I used to fuck him up.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
What a conversation he is like right out of the
pages of Jerry Springer and Maury Povichy.
Speaker 2 (09:53):
It is that you are the father.
Speaker 5 (09:57):
Ifringer and Mary Bovich had his son, it would be.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
All right, man, Thanks for calling, And I think we're
gonna close with you.
Speaker 2 (10:06):
Yes, yeah, how do you follow that?
Speaker 6 (10:09):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (10:09):
Before we get out of here, Bow and Anna have
a really funny idea for an Instagram video we're going
to do. We're gonna knock that out really quick and
put it up for y'all and then tomorrow Friday, Yes, buddy,
So we'll see you on Friday, all right.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
Wow,
It's the after show decompression session, doing what they do best,
clapping their gums.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
You're on and we're all data.
Speaker 3 (00:10):
We're so yeah. So I think that we're done with
the really nasty weather because the severe thunderstorm watch wrapped up. Okay,
but overnight more thunderstorms in the area, and then tomorrow
good chance of thunderstorms and Saturday. Talk to Mark Faber
from Texas Motor Speedway yesterday and they were doing their
laps for charity on Saturday where they raise money for
(00:33):
speedway children's charities, and they're worried about the weather. They're
keeping an eye on the weather because that would definitely
impact the lapse for charity.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Well, we don't want it to mess up the race
that's coming up. May the Fourth be with you, that's true.
Speaker 4 (00:47):
And it was very early this morning when I looked
at the weather report, but at like four o'clock this
morning or so, it said tomorrow, eventually we get into
a rain chance.
Speaker 3 (00:57):
Yes, ninety percent chance. You know what part of the metroplex.
The thing is is the temperature is going to be dropping.
And you know when we have warm temperatures then it
turns colder. That's when we get the hail and the
wind and the tornado with the weather alert everybody.
Speaker 4 (01:16):
I'm already seeing photographs on social from other parts of Texas, thankfully,
that are holding up pieces of hail, people holding it
in their hands out the size of a golf ball,
A golf ball, for Christ's sake.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
I don't know. Baseball size is what scares me. That'll
knock your ass out, Yeah, like the.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
Little golf ball and the ping pong ball size. He
that can do a lot of damage to your.
Speaker 4 (01:41):
Car, probably kill you if it comes from high up enough.
Speaker 3 (01:44):
And the Yeah, what is it?
Speaker 4 (01:46):
They used to say when I was a kid, They
used to say, if you drop a penny off the
Empire State Building and it lands on somebody's head, it'll
go straight through their body.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
No, it won't. Yeah, that's not true because of and
spins it and he goes like it's flying. Now, if
you were to drop maybe a marble, that might kill them, yeah,
like a bull.
Speaker 3 (02:11):
That's just one lie they told you when you were
a kid. Of all the lies that your parents told
you when you were a kid, like if you don't
eat your vegetables or something like. My brothers were so
cruel to me when I was little and we were
in San Antonio. They told me that if I did
not duck every time we went under an overpass, that
(02:32):
the ditch boys would get me and turn me into
a Tomali ditch boy.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
They made up these.
Speaker 3 (02:37):
Ditch boys that would come out at night from the
ditches in San Antonio and they would kill little kids
or make them into Tomali's. And so every time we
went under an overpass, I was ducking.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Well. My second oldest Bessie, who's moved back here, she
used to whenever we would drive, when we went by
a cemetery, she'd go and hold her breath. I said, Bessie,
what are you doing? I don't want death dust to
go into my law death dust. I wonder where she'd
(03:09):
heard that or learned that it wasn't for me.
Speaker 3 (03:14):
You sure about that?
Speaker 2 (03:15):
I don't know. I may have said something that set
her off here, I can't.
Speaker 4 (03:19):
I can't remember which movie it is. It's one of
Kevin Smith's movies. There's a scene where there's these two
guys working at a fast food restaurant and their boy
killing time by talking about girls, and the guy goes, hey, man,
have you and your girlfriend made out or have sex yet,
And his answer was no, because her parents planted a
(03:40):
pussy troll inside of her, and I have to wait
until she's eighteen when she peas it out, Oh, then
we can have sex.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
Story that.
Speaker 4 (03:53):
He goes, well, have you fooled around or anything else?
Have you tried to do anything else? And he goes, well,
the mouth troll his name. He's like, Okay, never mind,
just forget it.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
Let's see who's on the phony Hello Bow and them
Joe a pussy troll.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
Kevin Smith's screenplay Many mean, you know, you know that
explains a lot about my seventeen to twenty three year
old years.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
See you thought that was real.
Speaker 5 (04:24):
I thought it was really. Well, it's funny because when
I finally did, when I finally did mount it, yeah
it was there was there was like a it felt
it oh never.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Yeah yeah yeah. Yeah. You're taking us down a road
we're not really ready to travel.
Speaker 5 (04:47):
And the funny, the funny thing about that is is
that every time I mean, as I'm as I'm reaching
this age and I'm not sure if BO did it,
Alan you're not there yet and Anna just doesn't apply
to females. But Bo, when I hit sixty. Yeah, I
started to really I started to to wast in my
(05:09):
mind back to the days of you know, thinking, are
their kids out there I don't know about you know, okay,
and whatever happened to this one or that one? How
many of them? Of them are the ones that got away?
And you start to then also think at the same time,
(05:31):
the ones that you really can't believe you actually nailed.
I mean they were they they had you know, third
eyeballs in the middle of their foreheads.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
Nice broke you off a piece.
Speaker 6 (05:45):
Yeah, Well, like the old the old joke about you know,
at two am, you start to just pick the remaining
bunch of the remainders in the in the litter. True.
Speaker 5 (05:58):
I mean, you know, you don't want to go home alone,
but then they are the ones that you don't want
your friends to see you with.
Speaker 4 (06:04):
Next, do you have a genuine concern that you might
have some whoops of daisy babies bumbling around out there?
Speaker 5 (06:12):
Alan, It is so much more than a concern.
Speaker 2 (06:16):
He's afraid somebody's gonna show up in his door.
Speaker 3 (06:19):
Daddy, you know, my uncle, my dad's twe brother mattuh
he and his will put specifically that whoever came forward
and said that they were his child, that they would
receive one penny, and that covered his bases. So nobody
if they came forward and said I'm his kid, then
(06:41):
they would only receive one penny. So you may want
to do that, Matt, with your last will and testament.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
Yeah, that'll go over well, won't it.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
But you know what, it's legal. So then they cannot say, oh, well,
I was his biological kid and I need to have
part of the estate.
Speaker 4 (06:58):
Right right Here's.
Speaker 5 (07:02):
That that's no that that's that's that sound advice, But
it's like there are movies written about crap like that,
you know. I mean, I'll retire. I'll be living in
my little cabin off in the woods somewhere I'll be
I'll be cooking my the the bear that I killed
with a bow and arrow, over an open.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
Flame, and there will be a knock. There will be
a knock on my cabin door, right and I'm gonna
open it up, and there's gonna be this really really
cute little girl or this really really.
Speaker 5 (07:36):
Dark looking kid, and they're gonna say, are you Matt
Paul Kano? And my answer is gonna be, who the
fuck is asking, and then and then they're gonna say
something along the lines of do you remember so and so?
And I'm gonna think to myself, ship here it comes right, Well,
(07:56):
whatever happened is so and so well so and so
you know, and then I'm I'm her child, and you
know you you're my dad, and and like I say
in the movies, of course, it's all scripted, and things
either go great or things I have to go back.
But I have been seriously thinking about this because yes,
(08:17):
to answer ales earlier question, I would be surprised if
there aren't any. My god, you.
Speaker 3 (08:26):
Know that happened to a couple of friends of mine.
One of them was an independent record promoter. I used
to call him Howie the horror Dog.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
And he had a.
Speaker 3 (08:34):
Little girl show up at his doorstep and said, you
remember so and so? Well, I'm her daughter and you're
my dad. And he had bowed he would never have kids,
never wanted kids. And I tell you what, that daughter
of his was his pride and joy. Just uh but yeah,
I used to call him Howie the horn Dog because
(08:54):
I think he had a girl on every report.
Speaker 4 (08:57):
Matt, why's your blood pressure? Now you're an older man,
and these are things you're you're thinking. I'm not going
to accuse you of overthinking, but I'm gonna tell you
you're thinking about things that could raise your blood pressure
and most importantly, are out of the realm of your control.
Speaker 5 (09:13):
You know, let me let me say this about that,
and then I will let you go. Okay, you gotta
remember you gotta remember that. Given my circumstance, and you
may remember my circumstance, there is a very good chance
that some young man is going to show up on
my doorstep and say, I'm your long lost grandson because
(09:35):
and I'm going to be able to look at him.
I already told this to Anna. I'm gonna be able
to look at him and say, well, check this out. Kid.
Before your father came along, I used to fuck him up.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
What a conversation he is like right out of the
pages of Jerry Springer and Maury Povichy.
Speaker 2 (09:53):
It is that you are the father.
Speaker 5 (09:57):
Ifringer and Mary Bovich had his son, it would be.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
All right, man, Thanks for calling, And I think we're
gonna close with you.
Speaker 2 (10:06):
Yes, yeah, how do you follow that?
Speaker 6 (10:09):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (10:09):
Before we get out of here, Bow and Anna have
a really funny idea for an Instagram video we're going
to do. We're gonna knock that out really quick and
put it up for y'all and then tomorrow Friday, Yes, buddy,
So we'll see you on Friday, all right.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
Wow,
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