November 14, 2024 • 30 mins
This is the extraordinary true story of Tier One Special Forces soldier, adventurer, and world-record breaker Dean Stott. In a gripping retelling of his story, Dean shares insight into his esteemed military career in the British Army, where he conducted deployments to hostile environments, worked within counterterrorism operations in some of the most dangerous places in the world, and survived a horrific parachute accident.
Stott discloses how he continued to fuel his journey of excellence by starting a high-risk security company and becoming the first man to cycle the Pan American Highway in under one hundred days, and raising over a million dollars to support his friend Prince Harry's efforts with mental health awareness charities.
Dean Stott offers an inspiring reminder that we all have the capability to use our inner voices, drive, and instincts to become relentless in our pursuits in life.
A fantastic episode to share with 16+ as Dean’s lessons resonate with all:
You can’t control the uncontrollable—but you can choose how you react to life’s challenges.
Failure is just experience—as long as you learn and grow, there’s no such thing as losing.
Actions speak louder than words—if you believe in something, let your actions be the proof.
To buy Dean's book, Relentless, https://www.amazon.com/Relentless-Special-Operations-Record-Breaker/dp/1665725176
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:16):
When I left the special forces, I I spent a lot of time looking for
the team that I I could match when I was in special forces when real
not realizing it was underneath my nose. Today, I have the privilege of speaking
with Dean Stott. He's a remarkable individual. The best way to
frame his life is to frame it with words like dedication,
resilience, and reinvention. He's a
(00:36):
former British special forces soldier, spent 16 years in
service, facing challenges that manage courage, sacrifice,
and unwavering commitment to protecting what matters most.
He serves shoulder to shoulder with Prince Harry, and they've become
best of friends. After an injury ended his
military career My foot, which was caught in a line above my head.
(00:59):
And so I'm trying to clear my leg in time before this static line opens
the parachute. Dean went into a bit of a spiral. For me, I was trying
to match the adrenaline rush that I had when I was in the special forces
without actually coming to terms with the fact that I'd I'd left. Before
realizing that he he still had purpose. My wife sat me
down with 2 bottles of wine, and we had a long discussion through the night.
(01:20):
And chapter 16 in my book is called dead or divorced, and this is what
we we were chatting about. His story reminds us of the profound lessons learned
through service, lessons that apply to all of us in safeguarding what
we value, whether it's our loved ones, our communities, or our
principles.
(01:41):
Hi. It's Tony Chapman. Thank you for listening to Chatter That Matters presented
by RBC. If you can, please subscribe to the podcast. And
ratings and reviews, well, they're always welcome, and they're always appreciated.
Dean Stott, welcome to Chatter That Matters. Morning.
Age 8. You're part of a military family, which means you're
(02:03):
always on the move. What what did that mean to a kid of that age?
It was just the norm for me. Every 3 years, my father would get posted.
So every time you felt like you were getting settled, you were building
friendships, some sort of stability, you then were moving again and having to start all
over again. Tended to be these garrison towns, military towns,
where your friends at school, their fathers or mothers were in the
(02:25):
military as well. So you had something in in common there.
My dad's birthday is actually New Year's Eve. It was January 1st. Went
downstairs. She made me and my sister's breakfast. I could see there was
there was bloodstains on the floor. I didn't know what it was at the time,
but in reflection, there was obviously elements of, domestic
violence. She She didn't tell us what we were doing, put us on a train.
(02:46):
We were down in the south of England, and my mother was from Manchester originally.
And we drove back to Manchester because my grandparents were there. And it wasn't
until we got to Manchester that she then told us that she'd she'd now
left my father. For me, I was very close to my father. Did you resent
your mom and all for that? I mean, somebody that's close to their dad, not
that aware of what is going on. Did you sort of say, why
(03:08):
am I here? Why do I have to sort of fight to survive versus
whatever stability he had being a military kid? No. That I'm I was I was
aware of. You know, it just made those weekends with my father something
that we'd look forward to. And it was just that natural father son bonds.
My father went for custody for me and the kids, and the judge,
made a decision that he wasn't gonna split the siblings. The decision went down to
(03:31):
the eldest, which was me. A big decision at the age of
10 to say, I wanna live with my father. But when it actually came to
the day that my father came to pick us up and I saw how heartbroken
my mom was, you know, it's yeah. That that's still
that's still ingrained in my memory. I still remember
step by step that whole process, of my mother leaving and
(03:53):
my my father taking over. But from then on, when we
moved back down South, my father finished his 22 year
career, and then we we then transitioned into the civilian world. We actually moved
into a little village in the countryside in England where no one was from
the military, and that was where I did my last 4 years of
schooling. So there was a bit of stability then for me. I was no longer
(04:16):
fighting. I was no longer having to use my my fists. I was actually now
playing what you guys call soccer. I I was playing soccer and rugby,
and and everything else and and had a a normal childhood. In your
book, you talked about you always get asked the questions, what do you think you
wanna be? You say to your dad, you're thinking of a military
career, and he kinda looks at you and says, you wouldn't last 10 minutes. Yeah.
(04:38):
I I think on reflection, you know, you said 10 minutes. Yes. He said 2
minutes. So I'm glad he said 10, but it didn't get what he anticipated. You
know? But you can argue with someone who has a different opinion to you, and
you can keep arguing and arguing, and and you're probably not even gonna change
their mind. The best course of action was action itself. So that Monday morning,
I walked into the careers office and, and joined
(04:59):
the military. And I think it was from then on that my father was like,
okay. You know, he's actually being serious here. I was gonna join the parachute regiment.
He's like, no, you're not. He goes, you could be in the engineers and you
can get a trade. He was thinking to get as much as you can from
your time in the military, thinking I would probably do 3 to 5 years.
I joined at the age of 17a half. By the age of 21, I was
an airborne commando, a diver. I'd done every
(05:22):
arduous course you could do in the engineers, and the only sort
of real option then I hadn't done was tier 1 special forces.
I was already in tier 2 special forces. You know, your book is called
Relentless, but what gave you that attitude at that early in age to
say, I wanna crush this? I was growing physically, but
mentally, I was getting stronger as well. I started believing in myself that
(05:44):
actually not only can you do it, you are one of the one of the
better ones. And so within the, the Royal Engineers,
you know, the money is not great in the military. So the additional qualifications
like being a parachutist gets you an extra £5 a day. Being
a diver gives you an extra £20 a day. So I was just like, how
do I top up my beer tokens? And so
(06:05):
was doing these arduous courses, ended up in the commandos, which is the tier
2 special forces. But then there was always another group, another
tier that were just going off to tier 1 special forces. That was the pinnacle.
The tier 1 special forces is not like what you see
on Hollywood, where they're screaming and shouting at you in your face. They actually
don't even shout at you at all. The course is that hard itself. You have
(06:28):
to be self motivated, self driven. It takes a certain
individual. They're not all stocky with muscles. Some of them just blend in.
The way you talk about this group of people, I mean, it was almost a
second family or a community of friends that a lot of people
have growing up, but it was kinda denied here. When you speak to a lot
of veterans and they ask them what they miss, it's that camaraderie. Is that is
(06:49):
that sort of family? A lot of people from the military don't come
from stable backgrounds. And so when they actually get into the military,
they they find this friendship, this bond with these other
individuals. And remember, these individuals are doing everything that you're
doing. So the heartache and the pain that you're doing on these
courses, they're also experiencing that as well. So you have something
(07:11):
in common with them. So talk to me about tier 1. As you said, it's
a completely different step change. So our 1st 4 weeks
is basically a map and a compass, a big
backpack, a house on your back, and a weapon, and you're just running point
to point for 4 weeks. There's no one there shouting at you. There's no one
telling you you know, giving you motivation because if you are successful
(07:33):
and you end up in these units, you could find yourself working on your own
behind enemy lines, and you don't if you have to be motivated by someone
else, then you don't fit that mold. So the selection process,
as it says in selection, is to weed out. And it's not just the physical
ones as well. You can be the fittest person in the world. But if you
don't know how to operate that radio or operate that specialist bit equipment,
(07:54):
then then you're you're useless as well. So it actually is about,
information retention, self motivation. Yes. Having a bit of physical
ability. How much of what you learn should be
taken and brought in in context? Because obviously we're dealing with
different circumstances, but in a school. What you have nowadays in
society as well is everyone's worried about how they're gonna be portrayed.
(08:17):
Everyone's worried about failure. You know, the word failure, I I I don't
use that. You know, it's I call it an experience. You can't be experienced without
experiences. So I think with the children nowadays
is very difficult when they're all on on
digital. They're losing the skill sets of being able to to bond with
others, being able to communicate, as a group. So that
(08:38):
teamwork, is is something that's that's important,
but communication's important as well is that these kids know
that, you know, they can stand in front of the others. And if their decision's
wrong, it's wrong, but you learn from it. Often I see you with Prince Harry
and 2 very close friends sitting together. You ended
up with him because you kinda made a a remark when he first showed up
(09:00):
for training. To me, I think it's really interesting how sometimes
unforeseen remarks end up with a lifetime bond. Harry and
I, it was 2007, August 2007. I was a
sergeant in the in the special forces at this point, and
he was a young second lieutenant. He went on a JTAC course. So JTAC
is Joint Tactical Air Control. So I turned up on this course, and
(09:24):
he was actually sat directly in front of me. And then the first
lecture is is call signs. And so the instructor
said, you know, on this course, you're gonna be called jackpot 1 to
18. So Harry then puts his hand up and he he said, you know, if
successful on this course and I do go to Afghanistan, do I will I have
my own call successful on this course and I do go to Afghanistan, do I
will I have my own call sign? And I just blurted out. I said, yeah.
Your fox piss won because he had ginger hair. And and he he looked around.
(09:44):
He saw my beret and he
he smiled at me, but that was it. The sergeant major was then like, because
you need to then get partnered off. He's goes, you used to have partnered off.
Because he knew that I would treat him as one of the guys. I wouldn't
see him as a member of the royal family. I would see him as a
as a soldier and as an officer. And I'm sure he wanted that. Yeah. And
(10:06):
I think he liked it. You know, there was a couple occasions on that course
actually where we went to some training areas and people would
come over and give him a business card and say, look. My father
owns, you know, half of this county. Let's go hunting. And he he
must get that all the time. And so he just wanted to be treated like
one of the guys. Because if he was going on deployment, which he then did,
(10:27):
you know, he he was one of the guys. And, actually,
regardless of who his stature and who he was, he was actually one of
the better operators. He was very calm on the radio. He spoke
clearly to the pilots. He was really good. And so, yeah, we
formed that bond ship and that friendship and we continue that to today. It must
bother you sometimes when you read stuff that has no
(10:49):
sense of reality, you know, but I guess that just comes with with the
territory. I remember our first evening that we went out drinking. People were
coming up with cameras, and I was like, look. You need and he said, look.
There's nothing I can do. They're allowed to take photos. I said, yes. But they're
not allowed to take photos of us because we're in the special forces. So he
loved it. You know, you love the military. You're, you love the
(11:10):
camaraderie, but you're doing a training exercise and you have a parachute
accident Yeah. That ends your military career. Just take me back to
that. It's not like you're planning for retirement. It's not like you were thinking about
it. It just happened. Yeah. I I was a lifer, so that means I was
staying in for my full 22 and and beyond. I had no aspirations
of of leaving the military at all. And I'd been in 16 years at this
(11:32):
point. I was already HEY HO trained, and my sergeant major's like,
well, you know, just get some fun jumps in. I I never believe there's fun
jumps in the military or fun dives. This HEY HO is a high altitude, high
opening. So unlike skydiving where you're free of lines, it's actually still attached to
the aircraft. And as you exit the aircraft at 15,000 feet,
which is the limits of oxygen, the parachute will open and you
(11:53):
travel up to 30 minutes in the air or 50 kilometers
to your target point. As I exit the aircraft, I should be now
looking straight ahead. And actually, I'm looking up, and my leg is caught
in the line above my head. It was just a freak accident. I was trying
to clear my leg in time before the parachute went taut and
opened. I couldn't clear it in times, and it ripped my leg over my head
(12:14):
into the right. And thankfully, my ankle did clear from the line.
Otherwise, you had risk of taking your leg completely off. So straightaway,
I knew there was a problem. I never experienced pain like it. I was vomiting
because of the pain. Because of the altitude, the air was so thin. I was
drifting in and out of consciousness as well. Each time I was I was
regaining consciousness, I could see the guys, the stack, and I would just
(12:35):
follow them towards the, towards the, d zed. I
managed to land it one legged. It was a great landing. You know, because I
was worried that if I have a bad landing, I could damage the good leg.
But the, injury sustains, ended my career. I
tore my ACL, my MCL, my meniscus within my knee, all the
ligaments, my hamstring, my calf, and my quadriceps, all the support in muscles
(12:57):
as well. So normally, you could you could tear your ACL in your knee and
still carry on because you have good, muscle strength, but all the
muscles in my leg had gone as well. So I was then told, you know,
thank you for your time. It's time to leave. So I see my friends going
off to tour, and then I'm told, look, you now need to enter
this alien environment to me, which is the civilian sector. I've not been a civilian
(13:18):
since I was 17. And, you know, what is my role? What is my
purpose? How do I fit in society? At the time, I didn't really see it,
but Alana, my wife, saw it. I was going through an identity crisis. She even
described it in her book as saying she saw such a different side of you,
anger and violence and confusion. What advice can you
give to my listeners because we're in a world of a lot of uncertainty?
(13:41):
What I have learned over the years is you can't control the uncontrollable.
You just have to react to what's happening at the time. It got to a
point where I was angry and things like that, but I didn't actually communicate. I
should've communicated with Alana. So for me, it wasn't
until 5 years later that Alana and I then sat
down once again and realized that there'd been no communication.
(14:03):
You know, I thought that she wanted me away working, and she thought I
wanted to be away. It wasn't it wasn't the case. So just communicate
with your closest or your nearest and dearest and life is
life. Can't control the uncontrollable. Just roll with it. As you served in the
military, was there ever a time where you felt you
were as close to the end of your life as could be? When
(14:26):
you're young at that age, now if I was doing a job now, I'd probably
be a bit more risk averse than when I was younger, but you do almost
feel like indestructible because you have the best training, you have the
best support network, as well. You have the best medic medical care.
But I think if you if you think of the worst case scenario, what could
happen, what if, what if, you wouldn't get off the helicopter. You know, the worst
(14:47):
case scenario is you're gonna die. We do. We go in with that belief that
we will succeed every mission, whatever it takes, even if it's the last man
standing. So it's a mentality that's sort of been through
the years in the military, but then even more so through
selection. Now what I loved about your book, Relentless, is you you really
cover that area. But where I saw such a different
(15:09):
side of you is, as you said, when you're forced to
find the next move, you start a security
company. Maybe early on, it sounded like it was out of necessity. You needed
to get contracts, but it sounded like you continued to
gravitate where few people wanted those assignments. To add
to the pressure of me also leaving the military, Ilana was 8 months
(15:30):
pregnant with our first daughter. So in my head, it's like, I'm I'm
starting out over all over again. I don't know if there's any work out there.
How am I gonna support Alana? How am I gonna support our new baby? And
the security industry isn't risk reward ratio balanced at all. You know, we you could
be in the desert in Iraq and Afghanistan, Somalia looking
after, chairmans and executive protection or some of these
(15:51):
big sporting events. So that's where I wanted to focus is is less
risk and more reward. But I soon identified that these,
I call them the big five, the big security companies were charging 6, 7 figure
sums for crisis management and evacuation plans, which weren't
actually in place. It was just on a bit of paper. So I
bought 30 weapons on the black market. There was a huge proliferation of weapons at
(16:13):
the time and buried them between Tunis and Egypt and designed my own
evacuation plans. Designed these plans and sold them to the oil and gas sector
and just sat on them on the retainers. Hopefully never needed to use them. And
then 2012, got an oil company, a German
oil company safely back to Tripoli through safe houses I had.
So the evacuation plan that I'd written up would had now been
(16:35):
activated and and now been used. And then 2 years later, because
of the success of that, I received a phone call from the Canadian embassy. It
was now the Tripoli war, civil war between the militia and the government. And I
single handedly evacuated the Canadian embassy, 18 military and 4
diplomats from Tripoli back to Tunis. But it sounds
very sexy, sounds very Hollywood. I've never actually had to do use any of my
(16:57):
weapons or dig up any of my weapons at all. And something you
touched on earlier, which really resonates is Hollywood. You know, Hollywood has this
perception of guys like us. It's like, you know, Dwayne Johnson, Jason
Statham, the biceps, the bullets, and the bombs. But that's
the offensive action. That's 25% of actually what tier 1 special
forces do. 50% of what we do isn't really that glamorous.
(17:19):
It's hearts and minds and support and influence. It's being embedded with
locals on the ground, and that's where I was successful at what
I took from my time in the special forces to the security industry. It was
understanding the demographics, the politics, the tribal influences, and using
these locals and local intelligence, and that was the success
of of that operation. There's one part of your book where you had
(17:41):
everything going, but you forgot to put in a pair of brown contact lenses.
We used to go pick up, Taliban agents, and we would
dress up as Taliban ourselves. So this one day, I hit a roadblock, and
I got told to turn right. Went right, and it was bumper to bumper
with traffic. And we have these makeup kits. I had my own beard. I dyed
it black. But we have eyebrows, contact lenses, stuff to really sort of
(18:03):
break up your features. But I I don't like putting anything in my eyes.
I'd have a black beard, very nice tan turban, but then piercing
blue eyes. And I thought they stood out. So it was Bumber TO Bumber and
everyone started knocking on the door and knocking on the window of the vehicle. So
I said to my turd, I said, I think we've been compromised. And he he
agreed. They've seen my eyes. But your your senses
(18:25):
are heightened because you know you shouldn't be in that position. You know you're you're
undercover. And so you everything's going on in your head. HQ
can hear this. So they're talking in my earpiece. They're like, are you happy
with the drill, the immediate action drill? I said, yeah. I'm happy with
that. And immediate action drill basically is you we have a submachine gun
underneath our our seat. We we empty 30
(18:47):
rounds, the magazine into the windscreen to give yourself some time. You
grab your weapon. You go to the rear of the vehicle where there's a an
RPG, and you blow up the vehicle because you don't want them getting any
of the comms kit or specialist kit. So this is all going on in my
head. And I'm thinking CNN, orange boiler suit, you're thinking worst
case scenario. And, as I go to drop,
(19:09):
my hand to get the, the weapon, each time we're slowly nudging
forward with the traffic. Thankfully for me, the second vehicle has now come around the
corner and seeing what's going on. And my friend adds, you know,
he's he comes across the net and says, stop. Stop. Stop. So straight away, I
just I just dropped the the weapon and he said your turban's caught in
the door. I was misreading the situation because I was in a
(19:31):
heightened sense of, fear. When in fact,
everyone was being genuinely nice. So I use that a lot when I do a
lot of security presentations about people run into situations
and automatically assume the worst or see what's going on. The best thing to do
is just pause. Just pause for a few seconds, really
take in what's going on. Because, yeah, I I misread that
(19:53):
situation completely. We return much
more with Dean Stott and the kind of sacrifices he's
willing to make, and then my 3 takeaways.
Alright. It's Tony Chapman. Investing in Canada? Well, that matters
to RBC. $500,000,000,000 in sustainable financing
(20:14):
to combat climate change, 500,000,000 for future launch, a
10 year program to prepare youth for the jobs of tomorrow, helping to
discover the next generation of Olympians, artists monetizing their
talents, women entrepreneurs pursuing their dreams, supporting mental
health, and so much more. Investing in Canada, well that
matters to RBC.
(20:36):
I actually can relate to that when I got injured myself that
the point I had to leave this tribe and I couldn't get back
in. It's like, what is what is the the next tribe for me?
Could be in anything. If you've worked for a company for 20 years and you
retire, you know, you've left that tribe again. And it seems to be
a a a void. My guest today
(20:58):
is Dean Stott. What can you say about Saman who invests his life
protecting the lives of others? He's a 2 time world record
holder, a friend of Prince Harry, and an extraordinary entrepreneur.
You know, your security business is going well,
but either you or Alana or both of you realize there's still a
(21:19):
vacuum in your life. You come up with one of the most
extraordinary goals Yeah. Cycling
from Argentina to Alaska. Alana sat down with me
and highlighted I'd only been home 21 days in
365 day calendar. I totally disconnected from society. What I
was doing, what I thought was normal wasn't normal. We were doing some
(21:41):
very high end, profile jobs. And as well as
a security company, Alana was running a very successful property development company. So I actually
didn't need to be going away. It wasn't for the money. It was for me,
for the adrenaline rush. And so we decided take a sabbatical
from the security industry, go work with Alana. And Alana could
see that I needed to do something. And I said, well, I fancy doing a
(22:03):
wheel record. It was just before my 40th birthday. And Alana then found it
was Alana that found the wheel's longest road. So I joked that she clearly wanted
me out of the house. And, yeah, it's 14,000 miles from from
Southern Argentina to Northern Alaska over 2 continents.
I said, perfect. You know, for me, I knew I had the the mindset.
I knew I had the endurance. I just needed to turn that into a sport.
(22:25):
You know, I'd got to the top of, of my game within the
military. I was now one of the top, if not the top security
consultant in the industry. You know, could I do that again in a in
a sport that I'd never done before? I mean, this wasn't a military
operation where you were trained to trust each other and had each other. I mean,
you know, you had a lot of stray cats. Yeah. We had a lot of
(22:45):
stray cats. You know, we did it for I reached out to Harry. Him and
I had done a lot of charity work together, me, him, and Alain in the
past. And I told him about the bike ride. And he was, launching a
campaign with his brother and Kate on mental health. The Heads Together
campaign was very, it was launched at the London marathon. So a lot of
people really wanted to get around it. So we were inundated with requests
(23:06):
with people wanting to help on this challenge, thinking they wanted to do it
because of the cause, and to raise the money. I joke when
I say the bike ride was the easiest bit. The hardest bit was managing egos.
Other people, you know, wanting that exposure, wanting to
change the name at a challenge to match their company. And it's like, no, that
you can't. Because in charity, I don't know if it's like in the US, but
(23:28):
in the UK, you can't be finance you can't financially gain on the back end
of a charity. You raised over $1,400,000. That's
incredible. You know, the real record was a 117 days.
I I completed it in 99 days, became the first man in history to do
under a 100 days, which was impressive. But what was more impressive
was was the fundraising. Interesting enough, you know, Alana, she's she's the
(23:50):
genius behind that because it was left up to me. It'd probably be about $50
because I didn't I didn't know about social media either. We were, you
know, we had literally just started social media before I did the bike ride, and
the majority of the money came from big corporate donors. And it's nice that you're
giving so much credit to Elana, but, I mean, 300 and 40 miles and
17 hours to finish things this off and to put it under
(24:12):
a 100 days. Where the success of this this project was, it was actually
the situation changes on the ground and reacting to those situation changes. You
can't control the uncontrollable. You know, I took in in South
America, I I I had food poison. I got
crashed my bike. I got knocked off my bike. I took 10 days off the
South America world record. And I got into North America on day
(24:35):
70, and I was 14 days ahead. I'm like, perfect. Alana then rings
me, 5 times within an hour, and she's very good at
keeping the distractions away from me. And she's like, we've been invited to
Harry and Meg's wedding. I said, I said, nice. And she goes, no. You know,
you're now a day behind. So going into that phone call was 14 days ahead.
Next thing, I'm a day behind. So cycling in South America is
(24:57):
very different from North America. You know, I could cycle at night. And so I
got outside of the finish about a week outside. And then
my friend messaged me and said, have you seen this guy? He's professional cyclist,
got free of our endurance records, sponsored by Red Bull,
all the big brands. And he'd come out on social media and said that he
was gonna cycle it under a 100 days. And so every time I
(25:18):
was hitting my objective, my objective kept moving. If I'd
known about him, if I'd known about Harry's wedding
at the beginning when I set off, you know, would it have been too much?
Would I have been able to sort of deal with that pressure? For me, the
success of this was being reactive to the situation as it
unfolded in front of me. Are people around you realize that if they don't put
(25:39):
that rung ahead of you, that you get you might be dangerous by the fact
that you get bored? For me to be physically and mentally engaged,
I do need a challenge, and I think everyone does. Your
body is like a a river flowing. It needs to keep
moving. If it get if you pause, if you stop, you know, you have
those stagnant ponds, you know, you get ill. So you
(26:01):
need to keep flowing. You need to keep moving. But the problem with me is,
is the, is the, is the, is the controlling the flow, the speed of the
flow. You know, for me, it's like, I can't just go cycle or join a
cycling club. I have to find the world's biggest road. But everyone out there,
and I'm I'd say to people as well about promoting that physical activity helps
your mental state. You know, whether you're doing a 2 k run, which
(26:22):
for some people is probably just as hard for them physically and mentally as that
bike ride was for me is people have different fitness levels and mental
levels as well. So I would never criticize someone who's a 2 k
run. When you're over in the Middle East and they were banging on your window
and you thought you're being compromised, they were just trying to help. What
did you learn about the different countries that you
(26:44):
rode your bike through? Did did it change the way you feel about humanity? Yeah.
It does. You know, I I've been very fortunate to be around the world
and see different cultures as well, and I think that's where I've been successful in
the security industry is understanding those cultures. And and strangely
enough, the more hospitable countries are the only those that don't actually have much
money. The most some of the most hospitable people like me don't have 2
(27:05):
pennies to rub, but they will give you everything they have. And they always still
have a smile on their face. And whether that's in Africa or in
South America, a lot of people say to me, oh, you cycle through Mexico, you
cycle through Colombia. Yeah. But I'm I'm a a security consultant. And,
you know, for me, I I thoroughly enjoyed that. The only security
issue we had on the whole ride was Colorado. Someone broke into the
(27:28):
support vehicle and it comes with respect. You know, you need to respect them and
they'll they'll respect you. And and that's something I learned from my time in the
special forces and my time in in the security as well.
When I finished your book, Relentless, and it is a fantastic
read, I'll make sure I include it on the notes, but was there any time
in your life that stands out where
(27:49):
you truly feared your outcome? For me, there's always the questions of
what if I didn't join the military? You know, what if my dad didn't get
custody of me me and my sisters? Now what would the outcome be there? Would
I still be the same person I am now? And again, I just don't I
don't look back. I always look forward. You know, you do make
decisions in life. Some of them are right and some of them are wrong as
(28:09):
long as you sort of learn from them as well. You know? You know, we
have a great thing in the military called the hot debrief. You know, what worked,
what didn't work, and if we can do it again, what would we do differently?
And I talked about earlier about failure. People hate the
word failure. I call it an experience. I think as long as you learn from
that experience and don't repeat it, then you you you're
advancing. When you see people repeating the same failures, then they're they're
(28:33):
not learning from that. You know what, Dean? I always lend my conversations with my
takeaways, and there's so many, but I always try to bring it down to 3.
The first one is I really do wish we could bottle so much of how
you approach life. Today, kids are living with such negativity,
chasing false stereotypes and screens, and with it, a growing sense
of impossibility, especially young men. And I think that they
(28:55):
need to have the gift that you had with just trying to figure
stuff out as a kid. But when you got in the military, as you said,
finding your tribe and realizing it's humanity
working together where the magic lies. The second one is you can't
control the uncontrollable, a powerful statement. And
even within it, when you said, you know, there's nothing wrong with failure if we
(29:16):
learn from it. You're talking from experience, not some guy that wrote some
or woman that wrote some 5 steps to this or 5 steps to that. And
then the third one is just this, what you started off with, you talked about,
you know, you can argue till you're blue in your face, you rarely change someone's
opinion, but if you believe in something, back it up with action,
and that can change the world. So for all of this and more, I'd love
(29:38):
to be sitting and having a dinner conversation between these 2 superpowers,
which are so different, yet so happily in love and married. And and anytime that
you drive her crazy, she sends you out in another world record adventure. Yeah. No.
Thank you. I used to dread going away because if I if I went away
for too long, Alana has a lot of ideas. I'd come back and yeah. So
I try not go away as often now. Once
(30:00):
again, a special thanks to RBC for supporting Chatter That Matters.
It's Tony Chapman. Thanks for listening, and let's chat soon.
When I left the special forces, I I spent a lot of time looking for
the team that I I could match when I was in special forces when real
not realizing it was underneath my nose. Today, I have the privilege of speaking
with Dean Stott. He's a remarkable individual. The best way to
frame his life is to frame it with words like dedication,
resilience, and reinvention. He's a
(00:36):
former British special forces soldier, spent 16 years in
service, facing challenges that manage courage, sacrifice,
and unwavering commitment to protecting what matters most.
He serves shoulder to shoulder with Prince Harry, and they've become
best of friends. After an injury ended his
military career My foot, which was caught in a line above my head.
(00:59):
And so I'm trying to clear my leg in time before this static line opens
the parachute. Dean went into a bit of a spiral. For me, I was trying
to match the adrenaline rush that I had when I was in the special forces
without actually coming to terms with the fact that I'd I'd left. Before
realizing that he he still had purpose. My wife sat me
down with 2 bottles of wine, and we had a long discussion through the night.
(01:20):
And chapter 16 in my book is called dead or divorced, and this is what
we we were chatting about. His story reminds us of the profound lessons learned
through service, lessons that apply to all of us in safeguarding what
we value, whether it's our loved ones, our communities, or our
principles.
(01:41):
Hi. It's Tony Chapman. Thank you for listening to Chatter That Matters presented
by RBC. If you can, please subscribe to the podcast. And
ratings and reviews, well, they're always welcome, and they're always appreciated.
Dean Stott, welcome to Chatter That Matters. Morning.
Age 8. You're part of a military family, which means you're
(02:03):
always on the move. What what did that mean to a kid of that age?
It was just the norm for me. Every 3 years, my father would get posted.
So every time you felt like you were getting settled, you were building
friendships, some sort of stability, you then were moving again and having to start all
over again. Tended to be these garrison towns, military towns,
where your friends at school, their fathers or mothers were in the
(02:25):
military as well. So you had something in in common there.
My dad's birthday is actually New Year's Eve. It was January 1st. Went
downstairs. She made me and my sister's breakfast. I could see there was
there was bloodstains on the floor. I didn't know what it was at the time,
but in reflection, there was obviously elements of, domestic
violence. She She didn't tell us what we were doing, put us on a train.
(02:46):
We were down in the south of England, and my mother was from Manchester originally.
And we drove back to Manchester because my grandparents were there. And it wasn't
until we got to Manchester that she then told us that she'd she'd now
left my father. For me, I was very close to my father. Did you resent
your mom and all for that? I mean, somebody that's close to their dad, not
that aware of what is going on. Did you sort of say, why
(03:08):
am I here? Why do I have to sort of fight to survive versus
whatever stability he had being a military kid? No. That I'm I was I was
aware of. You know, it just made those weekends with my father something
that we'd look forward to. And it was just that natural father son bonds.
My father went for custody for me and the kids, and the judge,
made a decision that he wasn't gonna split the siblings. The decision went down to
(03:31):
the eldest, which was me. A big decision at the age of
10 to say, I wanna live with my father. But when it actually came to
the day that my father came to pick us up and I saw how heartbroken
my mom was, you know, it's yeah. That that's still
that's still ingrained in my memory. I still remember
step by step that whole process, of my mother leaving and
(03:53):
my my father taking over. But from then on, when we
moved back down South, my father finished his 22 year
career, and then we we then transitioned into the civilian world. We actually moved
into a little village in the countryside in England where no one was from
the military, and that was where I did my last 4 years of
schooling. So there was a bit of stability then for me. I was no longer
(04:16):
fighting. I was no longer having to use my my fists. I was actually now
playing what you guys call soccer. I I was playing soccer and rugby,
and and everything else and and had a a normal childhood. In your
book, you talked about you always get asked the questions, what do you think you
wanna be? You say to your dad, you're thinking of a military
career, and he kinda looks at you and says, you wouldn't last 10 minutes. Yeah.
(04:38):
I I think on reflection, you know, you said 10 minutes. Yes. He said 2
minutes. So I'm glad he said 10, but it didn't get what he anticipated. You
know? But you can argue with someone who has a different opinion to you, and
you can keep arguing and arguing, and and you're probably not even gonna change
their mind. The best course of action was action itself. So that Monday morning,
I walked into the careers office and, and joined
(04:59):
the military. And I think it was from then on that my father was like,
okay. You know, he's actually being serious here. I was gonna join the parachute regiment.
He's like, no, you're not. He goes, you could be in the engineers and you
can get a trade. He was thinking to get as much as you can from
your time in the military, thinking I would probably do 3 to 5 years.
I joined at the age of 17a half. By the age of 21, I was
an airborne commando, a diver. I'd done every
(05:22):
arduous course you could do in the engineers, and the only sort
of real option then I hadn't done was tier 1 special forces.
I was already in tier 2 special forces. You know, your book is called
Relentless, but what gave you that attitude at that early in age to
say, I wanna crush this? I was growing physically, but
mentally, I was getting stronger as well. I started believing in myself that
(05:44):
actually not only can you do it, you are one of the one of the
better ones. And so within the, the Royal Engineers,
you know, the money is not great in the military. So the additional qualifications
like being a parachutist gets you an extra £5 a day. Being
a diver gives you an extra £20 a day. So I was just like, how
do I top up my beer tokens? And so
(06:05):
was doing these arduous courses, ended up in the commandos, which is the tier
2 special forces. But then there was always another group, another
tier that were just going off to tier 1 special forces. That was the pinnacle.
The tier 1 special forces is not like what you see
on Hollywood, where they're screaming and shouting at you in your face. They actually
don't even shout at you at all. The course is that hard itself. You have
(06:28):
to be self motivated, self driven. It takes a certain
individual. They're not all stocky with muscles. Some of them just blend in.
The way you talk about this group of people, I mean, it was almost a
second family or a community of friends that a lot of people
have growing up, but it was kinda denied here. When you speak to a lot
of veterans and they ask them what they miss, it's that camaraderie. Is that is
(06:49):
that sort of family? A lot of people from the military don't come
from stable backgrounds. And so when they actually get into the military,
they they find this friendship, this bond with these other
individuals. And remember, these individuals are doing everything that you're
doing. So the heartache and the pain that you're doing on these
courses, they're also experiencing that as well. So you have something
(07:11):
in common with them. So talk to me about tier 1. As you said, it's
a completely different step change. So our 1st 4 weeks
is basically a map and a compass, a big
backpack, a house on your back, and a weapon, and you're just running point
to point for 4 weeks. There's no one there shouting at you. There's no one
telling you you know, giving you motivation because if you are successful
(07:33):
and you end up in these units, you could find yourself working on your own
behind enemy lines, and you don't if you have to be motivated by someone
else, then you don't fit that mold. So the selection process,
as it says in selection, is to weed out. And it's not just the physical
ones as well. You can be the fittest person in the world. But if you
don't know how to operate that radio or operate that specialist bit equipment,
(07:54):
then then you're you're useless as well. So it actually is about,
information retention, self motivation. Yes. Having a bit of physical
ability. How much of what you learn should be
taken and brought in in context? Because obviously we're dealing with
different circumstances, but in a school. What you have nowadays in
society as well is everyone's worried about how they're gonna be portrayed.
(08:17):
Everyone's worried about failure. You know, the word failure, I I I don't
use that. You know, it's I call it an experience. You can't be experienced without
experiences. So I think with the children nowadays
is very difficult when they're all on on
digital. They're losing the skill sets of being able to to bond with
others, being able to communicate, as a group. So that
(08:38):
teamwork, is is something that's that's important,
but communication's important as well is that these kids know
that, you know, they can stand in front of the others. And if their decision's
wrong, it's wrong, but you learn from it. Often I see you with Prince Harry
and 2 very close friends sitting together. You ended
up with him because you kinda made a a remark when he first showed up
(09:00):
for training. To me, I think it's really interesting how sometimes
unforeseen remarks end up with a lifetime bond. Harry and
I, it was 2007, August 2007. I was a
sergeant in the in the special forces at this point, and
he was a young second lieutenant. He went on a JTAC course. So JTAC
is Joint Tactical Air Control. So I turned up on this course, and
(09:24):
he was actually sat directly in front of me. And then the first
lecture is is call signs. And so the instructor
said, you know, on this course, you're gonna be called jackpot 1 to
18. So Harry then puts his hand up and he he said, you know, if
successful on this course and I do go to Afghanistan, do I will I have
my own call successful on this course and I do go to Afghanistan, do I
will I have my own call sign? And I just blurted out. I said, yeah.
Your fox piss won because he had ginger hair. And and he he looked around.
(09:44):
He saw my beret and he
he smiled at me, but that was it. The sergeant major was then like, because
you need to then get partnered off. He's goes, you used to have partnered off.
Because he knew that I would treat him as one of the guys. I wouldn't
see him as a member of the royal family. I would see him as a
as a soldier and as an officer. And I'm sure he wanted that. Yeah. And
(10:06):
I think he liked it. You know, there was a couple occasions on that course
actually where we went to some training areas and people would
come over and give him a business card and say, look. My father
owns, you know, half of this county. Let's go hunting. And he he
must get that all the time. And so he just wanted to be treated like
one of the guys. Because if he was going on deployment, which he then did,
(10:27):
you know, he he was one of the guys. And, actually,
regardless of who his stature and who he was, he was actually one of
the better operators. He was very calm on the radio. He spoke
clearly to the pilots. He was really good. And so, yeah, we
formed that bond ship and that friendship and we continue that to today. It must
bother you sometimes when you read stuff that has no
(10:49):
sense of reality, you know, but I guess that just comes with with the
territory. I remember our first evening that we went out drinking. People were
coming up with cameras, and I was like, look. You need and he said, look.
There's nothing I can do. They're allowed to take photos. I said, yes. But they're
not allowed to take photos of us because we're in the special forces. So he
loved it. You know, you love the military. You're, you love the
(11:10):
camaraderie, but you're doing a training exercise and you have a parachute
accident Yeah. That ends your military career. Just take me back to
that. It's not like you're planning for retirement. It's not like you were thinking about
it. It just happened. Yeah. I I was a lifer, so that means I was
staying in for my full 22 and and beyond. I had no aspirations
of of leaving the military at all. And I'd been in 16 years at this
(11:32):
point. I was already HEY HO trained, and my sergeant major's like,
well, you know, just get some fun jumps in. I I never believe there's fun
jumps in the military or fun dives. This HEY HO is a high altitude, high
opening. So unlike skydiving where you're free of lines, it's actually still attached to
the aircraft. And as you exit the aircraft at 15,000 feet,
which is the limits of oxygen, the parachute will open and you
(11:53):
travel up to 30 minutes in the air or 50 kilometers
to your target point. As I exit the aircraft, I should be now
looking straight ahead. And actually, I'm looking up, and my leg is caught
in the line above my head. It was just a freak accident. I was trying
to clear my leg in time before the parachute went taut and
opened. I couldn't clear it in times, and it ripped my leg over my head
(12:14):
into the right. And thankfully, my ankle did clear from the line.
Otherwise, you had risk of taking your leg completely off. So straightaway,
I knew there was a problem. I never experienced pain like it. I was vomiting
because of the pain. Because of the altitude, the air was so thin. I was
drifting in and out of consciousness as well. Each time I was I was
regaining consciousness, I could see the guys, the stack, and I would just
(12:35):
follow them towards the, towards the, d zed. I
managed to land it one legged. It was a great landing. You know, because I
was worried that if I have a bad landing, I could damage the good leg.
But the, injury sustains, ended my career. I
tore my ACL, my MCL, my meniscus within my knee, all the
ligaments, my hamstring, my calf, and my quadriceps, all the support in muscles
(12:57):
as well. So normally, you could you could tear your ACL in your knee and
still carry on because you have good, muscle strength, but all the
muscles in my leg had gone as well. So I was then told, you know,
thank you for your time. It's time to leave. So I see my friends going
off to tour, and then I'm told, look, you now need to enter
this alien environment to me, which is the civilian sector. I've not been a civilian
(13:18):
since I was 17. And, you know, what is my role? What is my
purpose? How do I fit in society? At the time, I didn't really see it,
but Alana, my wife, saw it. I was going through an identity crisis. She even
described it in her book as saying she saw such a different side of you,
anger and violence and confusion. What advice can you
give to my listeners because we're in a world of a lot of uncertainty?
(13:41):
What I have learned over the years is you can't control the uncontrollable.
You just have to react to what's happening at the time. It got to a
point where I was angry and things like that, but I didn't actually communicate. I
should've communicated with Alana. So for me, it wasn't
until 5 years later that Alana and I then sat
down once again and realized that there'd been no communication.
(14:03):
You know, I thought that she wanted me away working, and she thought I
wanted to be away. It wasn't it wasn't the case. So just communicate
with your closest or your nearest and dearest and life is
life. Can't control the uncontrollable. Just roll with it. As you served in the
military, was there ever a time where you felt you
were as close to the end of your life as could be? When
(14:26):
you're young at that age, now if I was doing a job now, I'd probably
be a bit more risk averse than when I was younger, but you do almost
feel like indestructible because you have the best training, you have the
best support network, as well. You have the best medic medical care.
But I think if you if you think of the worst case scenario, what could
happen, what if, what if, you wouldn't get off the helicopter. You know, the worst
(14:47):
case scenario is you're gonna die. We do. We go in with that belief that
we will succeed every mission, whatever it takes, even if it's the last man
standing. So it's a mentality that's sort of been through
the years in the military, but then even more so through
selection. Now what I loved about your book, Relentless, is you you really
cover that area. But where I saw such a different
(15:09):
side of you is, as you said, when you're forced to
find the next move, you start a security
company. Maybe early on, it sounded like it was out of necessity. You needed
to get contracts, but it sounded like you continued to
gravitate where few people wanted those assignments. To add
to the pressure of me also leaving the military, Ilana was 8 months
(15:30):
pregnant with our first daughter. So in my head, it's like, I'm I'm
starting out over all over again. I don't know if there's any work out there.
How am I gonna support Alana? How am I gonna support our new baby? And
the security industry isn't risk reward ratio balanced at all. You know, we you could
be in the desert in Iraq and Afghanistan, Somalia looking
after, chairmans and executive protection or some of these
(15:51):
big sporting events. So that's where I wanted to focus is is less
risk and more reward. But I soon identified that these,
I call them the big five, the big security companies were charging 6, 7 figure
sums for crisis management and evacuation plans, which weren't
actually in place. It was just on a bit of paper. So I
bought 30 weapons on the black market. There was a huge proliferation of weapons at
(16:13):
the time and buried them between Tunis and Egypt and designed my own
evacuation plans. Designed these plans and sold them to the oil and gas sector
and just sat on them on the retainers. Hopefully never needed to use them. And
then 2012, got an oil company, a German
oil company safely back to Tripoli through safe houses I had.
So the evacuation plan that I'd written up would had now been
(16:35):
activated and and now been used. And then 2 years later, because
of the success of that, I received a phone call from the Canadian embassy. It
was now the Tripoli war, civil war between the militia and the government. And I
single handedly evacuated the Canadian embassy, 18 military and 4
diplomats from Tripoli back to Tunis. But it sounds
very sexy, sounds very Hollywood. I've never actually had to do use any of my
(16:57):
weapons or dig up any of my weapons at all. And something you
touched on earlier, which really resonates is Hollywood. You know, Hollywood has this
perception of guys like us. It's like, you know, Dwayne Johnson, Jason
Statham, the biceps, the bullets, and the bombs. But that's
the offensive action. That's 25% of actually what tier 1 special
forces do. 50% of what we do isn't really that glamorous.
(17:19):
It's hearts and minds and support and influence. It's being embedded with
locals on the ground, and that's where I was successful at what
I took from my time in the special forces to the security industry. It was
understanding the demographics, the politics, the tribal influences, and using
these locals and local intelligence, and that was the success
of of that operation. There's one part of your book where you had
(17:41):
everything going, but you forgot to put in a pair of brown contact lenses.
We used to go pick up, Taliban agents, and we would
dress up as Taliban ourselves. So this one day, I hit a roadblock, and
I got told to turn right. Went right, and it was bumper to bumper
with traffic. And we have these makeup kits. I had my own beard. I dyed
it black. But we have eyebrows, contact lenses, stuff to really sort of
(18:03):
break up your features. But I I don't like putting anything in my eyes.
I'd have a black beard, very nice tan turban, but then piercing
blue eyes. And I thought they stood out. So it was Bumber TO Bumber and
everyone started knocking on the door and knocking on the window of the vehicle. So
I said to my turd, I said, I think we've been compromised. And he he
agreed. They've seen my eyes. But your your senses
(18:25):
are heightened because you know you shouldn't be in that position. You know you're you're
undercover. And so you everything's going on in your head. HQ
can hear this. So they're talking in my earpiece. They're like, are you happy
with the drill, the immediate action drill? I said, yeah. I'm happy with
that. And immediate action drill basically is you we have a submachine gun
underneath our our seat. We we empty 30
(18:47):
rounds, the magazine into the windscreen to give yourself some time. You
grab your weapon. You go to the rear of the vehicle where there's a an
RPG, and you blow up the vehicle because you don't want them getting any
of the comms kit or specialist kit. So this is all going on in my
head. And I'm thinking CNN, orange boiler suit, you're thinking worst
case scenario. And, as I go to drop,
(19:09):
my hand to get the, the weapon, each time we're slowly nudging
forward with the traffic. Thankfully for me, the second vehicle has now come around the
corner and seeing what's going on. And my friend adds, you know,
he's he comes across the net and says, stop. Stop. Stop. So straight away, I
just I just dropped the the weapon and he said your turban's caught in
the door. I was misreading the situation because I was in a
(19:31):
heightened sense of, fear. When in fact,
everyone was being genuinely nice. So I use that a lot when I do a
lot of security presentations about people run into situations
and automatically assume the worst or see what's going on. The best thing to do
is just pause. Just pause for a few seconds, really
take in what's going on. Because, yeah, I I misread that
(19:53):
situation completely. We return much
more with Dean Stott and the kind of sacrifices he's
willing to make, and then my 3 takeaways.
Alright. It's Tony Chapman. Investing in Canada? Well, that matters
to RBC. $500,000,000,000 in sustainable financing
(20:14):
to combat climate change, 500,000,000 for future launch, a
10 year program to prepare youth for the jobs of tomorrow, helping to
discover the next generation of Olympians, artists monetizing their
talents, women entrepreneurs pursuing their dreams, supporting mental
health, and so much more. Investing in Canada, well that
matters to RBC.
(20:36):
I actually can relate to that when I got injured myself that
the point I had to leave this tribe and I couldn't get back
in. It's like, what is what is the the next tribe for me?
Could be in anything. If you've worked for a company for 20 years and you
retire, you know, you've left that tribe again. And it seems to be
a a a void. My guest today
(20:58):
is Dean Stott. What can you say about Saman who invests his life
protecting the lives of others? He's a 2 time world record
holder, a friend of Prince Harry, and an extraordinary entrepreneur.
You know, your security business is going well,
but either you or Alana or both of you realize there's still a
(21:19):
vacuum in your life. You come up with one of the most
extraordinary goals Yeah. Cycling
from Argentina to Alaska. Alana sat down with me
and highlighted I'd only been home 21 days in
365 day calendar. I totally disconnected from society. What I
was doing, what I thought was normal wasn't normal. We were doing some
(21:41):
very high end, profile jobs. And as well as
a security company, Alana was running a very successful property development company. So I actually
didn't need to be going away. It wasn't for the money. It was for me,
for the adrenaline rush. And so we decided take a sabbatical
from the security industry, go work with Alana. And Alana could
see that I needed to do something. And I said, well, I fancy doing a
(22:03):
wheel record. It was just before my 40th birthday. And Alana then found it
was Alana that found the wheel's longest road. So I joked that she clearly wanted
me out of the house. And, yeah, it's 14,000 miles from from
Southern Argentina to Northern Alaska over 2 continents.
I said, perfect. You know, for me, I knew I had the the mindset.
I knew I had the endurance. I just needed to turn that into a sport.
(22:25):
You know, I'd got to the top of, of my game within the
military. I was now one of the top, if not the top security
consultant in the industry. You know, could I do that again in a in
a sport that I'd never done before? I mean, this wasn't a military
operation where you were trained to trust each other and had each other. I mean,
you know, you had a lot of stray cats. Yeah. We had a lot of
(22:45):
stray cats. You know, we did it for I reached out to Harry. Him and
I had done a lot of charity work together, me, him, and Alain in the
past. And I told him about the bike ride. And he was, launching a
campaign with his brother and Kate on mental health. The Heads Together
campaign was very, it was launched at the London marathon. So a lot of
people really wanted to get around it. So we were inundated with requests
(23:06):
with people wanting to help on this challenge, thinking they wanted to do it
because of the cause, and to raise the money. I joke when
I say the bike ride was the easiest bit. The hardest bit was managing egos.
Other people, you know, wanting that exposure, wanting to
change the name at a challenge to match their company. And it's like, no, that
you can't. Because in charity, I don't know if it's like in the US, but
(23:28):
in the UK, you can't be finance you can't financially gain on the back end
of a charity. You raised over $1,400,000. That's
incredible. You know, the real record was a 117 days.
I I completed it in 99 days, became the first man in history to do
under a 100 days, which was impressive. But what was more impressive
was was the fundraising. Interesting enough, you know, Alana, she's she's the
(23:50):
genius behind that because it was left up to me. It'd probably be about $50
because I didn't I didn't know about social media either. We were, you
know, we had literally just started social media before I did the bike ride, and
the majority of the money came from big corporate donors. And it's nice that you're
giving so much credit to Elana, but, I mean, 300 and 40 miles and
17 hours to finish things this off and to put it under
(24:12):
a 100 days. Where the success of this this project was, it was actually
the situation changes on the ground and reacting to those situation changes. You
can't control the uncontrollable. You know, I took in in South
America, I I I had food poison. I got
crashed my bike. I got knocked off my bike. I took 10 days off the
South America world record. And I got into North America on day
(24:35):
70, and I was 14 days ahead. I'm like, perfect. Alana then rings
me, 5 times within an hour, and she's very good at
keeping the distractions away from me. And she's like, we've been invited to
Harry and Meg's wedding. I said, I said, nice. And she goes, no. You know,
you're now a day behind. So going into that phone call was 14 days ahead.
Next thing, I'm a day behind. So cycling in South America is
(24:57):
very different from North America. You know, I could cycle at night. And so I
got outside of the finish about a week outside. And then
my friend messaged me and said, have you seen this guy? He's professional cyclist,
got free of our endurance records, sponsored by Red Bull,
all the big brands. And he'd come out on social media and said that he
was gonna cycle it under a 100 days. And so every time I
(25:18):
was hitting my objective, my objective kept moving. If I'd
known about him, if I'd known about Harry's wedding
at the beginning when I set off, you know, would it have been too much?
Would I have been able to sort of deal with that pressure? For me, the
success of this was being reactive to the situation as it
unfolded in front of me. Are people around you realize that if they don't put
(25:39):
that rung ahead of you, that you get you might be dangerous by the fact
that you get bored? For me to be physically and mentally engaged,
I do need a challenge, and I think everyone does. Your
body is like a a river flowing. It needs to keep
moving. If it get if you pause, if you stop, you know, you have
those stagnant ponds, you know, you get ill. So you
(26:01):
need to keep flowing. You need to keep moving. But the problem with me is,
is the, is the, is the, is the controlling the flow, the speed of the
flow. You know, for me, it's like, I can't just go cycle or join a
cycling club. I have to find the world's biggest road. But everyone out there,
and I'm I'd say to people as well about promoting that physical activity helps
your mental state. You know, whether you're doing a 2 k run, which
(26:22):
for some people is probably just as hard for them physically and mentally as that
bike ride was for me is people have different fitness levels and mental
levels as well. So I would never criticize someone who's a 2 k
run. When you're over in the Middle East and they were banging on your window
and you thought you're being compromised, they were just trying to help. What
did you learn about the different countries that you
(26:44):
rode your bike through? Did did it change the way you feel about humanity? Yeah.
It does. You know, I I've been very fortunate to be around the world
and see different cultures as well, and I think that's where I've been successful in
the security industry is understanding those cultures. And and strangely
enough, the more hospitable countries are the only those that don't actually have much
money. The most some of the most hospitable people like me don't have 2
(27:05):
pennies to rub, but they will give you everything they have. And they always still
have a smile on their face. And whether that's in Africa or in
South America, a lot of people say to me, oh, you cycle through Mexico, you
cycle through Colombia. Yeah. But I'm I'm a a security consultant. And,
you know, for me, I I thoroughly enjoyed that. The only security
issue we had on the whole ride was Colorado. Someone broke into the
(27:28):
support vehicle and it comes with respect. You know, you need to respect them and
they'll they'll respect you. And and that's something I learned from my time in the
special forces and my time in in the security as well.
When I finished your book, Relentless, and it is a fantastic
read, I'll make sure I include it on the notes, but was there any time
in your life that stands out where
(27:49):
you truly feared your outcome? For me, there's always the questions of
what if I didn't join the military? You know, what if my dad didn't get
custody of me me and my sisters? Now what would the outcome be there? Would
I still be the same person I am now? And again, I just don't I
don't look back. I always look forward. You know, you do make
decisions in life. Some of them are right and some of them are wrong as
(28:09):
long as you sort of learn from them as well. You know? You know, we
have a great thing in the military called the hot debrief. You know, what worked,
what didn't work, and if we can do it again, what would we do differently?
And I talked about earlier about failure. People hate the
word failure. I call it an experience. I think as long as you learn from
that experience and don't repeat it, then you you you're
advancing. When you see people repeating the same failures, then they're they're
(28:33):
not learning from that. You know what, Dean? I always lend my conversations with my
takeaways, and there's so many, but I always try to bring it down to 3.
The first one is I really do wish we could bottle so much of how
you approach life. Today, kids are living with such negativity,
chasing false stereotypes and screens, and with it, a growing sense
of impossibility, especially young men. And I think that they
(28:55):
need to have the gift that you had with just trying to figure
stuff out as a kid. But when you got in the military, as you said,
finding your tribe and realizing it's humanity
working together where the magic lies. The second one is you can't
control the uncontrollable, a powerful statement. And
even within it, when you said, you know, there's nothing wrong with failure if we
(29:16):
learn from it. You're talking from experience, not some guy that wrote some
or woman that wrote some 5 steps to this or 5 steps to that. And
then the third one is just this, what you started off with, you talked about,
you know, you can argue till you're blue in your face, you rarely change someone's
opinion, but if you believe in something, back it up with action,
and that can change the world. So for all of this and more, I'd love
(29:38):
to be sitting and having a dinner conversation between these 2 superpowers,
which are so different, yet so happily in love and married. And and anytime that
you drive her crazy, she sends you out in another world record adventure. Yeah. No.
Thank you. I used to dread going away because if I if I went away
for too long, Alana has a lot of ideas. I'd come back and yeah. So
I try not go away as often now. Once
(30:00):
again, a special thanks to RBC for supporting Chatter That Matters.
It's Tony Chapman. Thanks for listening, and let's chat soon.
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