Ep. 34 - Funny, Smart and Surprisingly Funky - A Very Merry Podcast

Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Now this is the FCB Podcast Network. Well, welcome back, everybody to
another episode of a Very Merry Podcast. I am your very merry host,

(00:21):
Kira Davis, and I am joinedby my very merry co host, Amelia
Hamilton. Amelia, Merry Christmas,Verry Christmas. It's not actually Christmas,
but we are getting back into thespirit of things. We didn't quit,
we just slowed down while we dealtwith life. But we are back and
we are back for another Christmas season. Amelia's got an amazing schedule plan for

(00:44):
us this season, but we decidedto kick off the Christmas season with a
little departure. We've moved over toNetflix. This week, Amelia and we
look at what is probably now boundto be a Netflix classic. I think
it's a classic in the fact thatit sort of moved the Hallmark brand off

(01:07):
of Hallmark. But I'm gonna saythis before we get going. I liked
this movie. I enjoyed it.I had a few problems with it,
but overall, I think this moviemade me realize some things about the Hallmark
universe. So I have had acouple of revelations watching this film that I

(01:30):
can't wait to share with you andthe listeners. So I hope you're ready.
I cannot wait for them to berevealed to me. Well, take
us through this movie. This week'smovie is the Netflix now I think soon
to be classic a Christmas Prince.Yes, So one of the reasons I
really wanted to do this one.It's from twenty seventeen, and this was

(01:52):
one of the first times, Imean the first time on Netflix, but
where that kind of at the time, it was sort of like a Hallmark
brand went like mainstream, you know. So it was the first time that
like a Hallmark movie was on Netflix. And I remember came out in November.
I was baking Christmas cookies, turnedit on and I was excited.

(02:14):
I was like, this is aHallmark movie on Netflix. And people who
hadn't gotten into that brand were watchingit and they were like, what is
this magic? This is like thecheesiest movie, but I can't stop watching
it and it was incredible. Soone thing I remember and I pulled up
I've went and found the tweet beforewe started recording. Netflix tweeted, okay,

(02:36):
so this is December tenth, twentyseventeen. They tweeted to the fifty
three people who have watched a ChristmasPrince every day for the past eighteen days.
Who hurt you? Actually, theygot some blowback because people were like,
nobody hurt me. What you know, how dare you? Or like
stop judging your own viewers, youknow, and you know it was lighthearted.

(03:00):
They were just having fun, butlike, you know, it had
been out for eighteen days and youknow they can go and check they know
what you're watching. There were fiftythree people who had watched it every single
day since it came out. Wow, you know, these movies make people
feel good. And there were fiftythree people who had watched it every day.
I mean those fifty three people,someone needed to tell them about the

(03:23):
Hallmark channel. Just turn the channelon. It is back to back of
these movies all day long. Andthen you don't have to because Netflix is
really good at shaming, right,because when you're watching, when you're streaming
something, and then you get thatlittle message like are you still watching?
Yeah, like judging you for beinglike, I know you've sat on your
fat ass for the last twelve hourswatching this show. Are you done yet?

(03:46):
You're like kind of, but Iwas also texting the whole time,
So leave me alone. I'm comfortshow. Well, let me say this
before we get into this, Amelion. I think I'm gonna make this a
regular part of our show moving forward, because I have as we've got more
popular and as we've done more ofthese episodes. We talk a lot about

(04:10):
our genuine love for the Hallmark Universe, and we get snarky and we criticize
on this show, but it's allcoming from a place of love. So
I want to start every episode outwith a little introduction thirty seconds or so
about what we do. I'll justI'll give you the initial overview so that
if people are listening to the showfor the first time, especially people who
are involved in the productions. Iknow some of you get excited you see

(04:34):
that there's a podcast about your filmand you want to listen to it.
I want to set some ground rulesfor you moving forward. So this is
a podcast where we make fun ofwhat we're seeing on the screen, but
we're making fun of it with love. There are certain things we understand about
these productions. The budgets are low, the scripts are necessarily generic, and

(05:01):
we appreciate that and that's part ofthe joy of it. But we understand
that we're not watching oscar bait here. We understand that productions are limited in
this genre, and we also understandthat actors can only work with the things
that they've been given. So thesewere very short as well. What's said,

(05:26):
I didn't hear that production timelines aswell, right, production timelines.
Actually, there's probably a lot ofgreat lessons for making movies in this process,
because it is kind of gonzo filmmakingin a lot of ways. So
I say all that to say thatthese are the things we understand go into
making these films, and these areultimately the things that we enjoy, and

(05:49):
ultimately these are also the things thatallow us to do a playful ribbing.
But we recognize the difficulty of makinga film. We congratulate everyone who participated
for making their film. Now,Amelia, let's talk about this film,
A Christmas Prince, right, webring you this week a Christmas Prince,

(06:09):
like we said, Netflix twenty seventeen. This is starring Ben Lamb and Rose
mc iver. Ben Lamb so Ialso know him from the stars A White
Let's see White, Oh the WhiteQueen. Yeah, and then Rose mc
iver she's on Ghosts, which Iabsolutely love. It is hilarious. The

(06:32):
sitcom where she moves into a hauntedhouse. It's great. She can see
the ghost but her husband can't.It's hilarious. What's that on I've never
heard of it. I think it'son CBS. It's really funny, very
good. Well, I'll say thisa Ben Lamb tall drink of water?
Am I right? Yes? Ilooked up his height. He's sixty.

(06:54):
He is so much taller than everyonein this movie. Rose mc iver.
I had to look up. Wasone of my biggest problems with this film.
I didn't understand the casting, andshe looked so familiar. When I
looked her up, I realized,Oh, I do like her. I've
seen her another things. She wasan eye zombie on the CW and she's
really good at playing like dark andsnarky and and so I was really disappointed

(07:18):
in this performance. I thought shehad the she she was the one thing
that brought the film down. However, she's not a terrible actress, because
I've seen her in other things andI enjoy her and other things. So
I was disappointed with this performance.But Ben Lamb was fine to look at.
Did not hate it. So thefirst thing I actually made a note

(07:42):
of was like the second I hitplay before the movie even started. I
loved the first night, Come Up, Comes Up, as it says,
rated TVPG for fear and suggestive dialogue. Okay, there was suggestive dial in
here. I had a real problemwith it, trying to like give a

(08:03):
lot of leeway to Netflix because it'sNetflix, But there was some suggestive dialog.
Where was the fear I'm afraid ofnothing? The toboggan ride. I
really was afraid that little girl wasgonna flip over and break her legs.
I have. I mean, we'reboth winter weather people. I have smashed

(08:24):
into a tree on a toboggan beforeand busted up my knee. So immediately,
like I was like play and pause. I want to write this down
before it even said, like youknow, the production company or anything.
I was laughing before it even started. So there you go. Here' suggest
a dialogue. So, as we'vetalked about in Christmas Land, there are

(08:46):
a limited number of jobs, andit is immediately established that she has one
of them. She is a writer. She is taking on everybody's nonsense at
this company. She works as likea tabloid reporter. She has rewrite writing
the you know crap that everybody elseis filing. You know this, this
you know guy who thinks he's fancyis turning in absolute junk. And she

(09:09):
is rewriting it, and she's like, but you don't need me to edit
this. It's a total rewrite.And he's like, and just write it.
But he says, as writers bestpart and always the writing career in
Hallmark land is is you know inChristmas land is. It's always a very
romanticized version of it. But hesays to her, she says, you

(09:35):
passed in six hundred and forty wordson a three hundred and fifty word deadline.
And he's like, well, justedit it, cut make the necessary
changes. You've written twice the article. I don't think people understand how the
huge difference between six hundred words andthree hundred words. It's it's a chasm

(10:03):
apart to ask another person to deletehalf of your article, the article that
you wrote and you know what it'sabout. I was like, what kind
of joker is this guy? Yeah, And he's like, I just do
it, which in some ways that'sactually a compliment because I'm not asking anybody
else to cut half my article,And like, trust them to cut the

(10:24):
right half. But also that's waytoo much to ask for somebody else,
and no, it's a whole article. And also what kind what the hell
kind of writer argued when you knowthat the it's one thing to turn in
four hundred words on a three hundredand fifty word piece, to turn in

(10:46):
twice the amount, I mean,it's just the height of unprofessionalism. This
junior copy of it, I'll fixor whatever. You know. So clearly
she's like this underappreciated. And thenyou should make some comment that she's also
trying to freelance on the side,but she's felt that and wait, wait,
turn it in stuff. Nobody's listeningto our pitches. Wait, so

(11:07):
at one moment, right, noone's listening to her pitches. So one
moment, she's sitting at her deskand she's talking to her too BFF.
So this is we should also notethat this is twenty seventeen, this is
pre BLM, so we didn't haveto cram diversity into everything. We were
still able to treat it as thesuperficial thing that Hollywood wants treating as.

(11:33):
So they have a black best friendand a gay best friend at her office.
She's she's talking about how I'm unfulfilledin this copy editing job, and
the freelancing thing isn't going well.I've gotten rejection letters every week for you
know, five months, and sheholds up a physical letter. What company

(11:56):
is sending her physical snail mail injectionletters for her submissions? I don't know.
She's obviously submitting to the wrong placesbecause readers digest. I don't know
who sends letters. I don't knowwho sends letters. So she's sitting there
complaining to these like the they're verytwo d the best friends, you know,

(12:18):
the black best friend and the gaybest friend. But the gay best
friend is a full stereotype. Theblack best friend is just sort of two
dimensional, but the gay best friendis just a full stereotype. So she's
called to the editor's office, andthe editor is like they like lean way
into like the exposition. She's justlike, tell me everything you know about

(12:41):
the royal family of Aldovia. I'mhere for it. Yeah, I'm here
for it, I know. Andthat's how the audience finds everything out.
So here's what we know. Theking died last year and the prince is
supposed to take over the throne,but he's a flake, he's a playboy,
he's a socialite, and his nameis Prince Richard. So they have

(13:03):
this interregnum period, so he needsto take the throne by Christmas or who
knows what happens. Nobody knows,So basically, there's a press conference on
December eighteenth, and then there's aball on Christmas Eve where he's going to
be crowned, but he's just sortof like disappeared because he's this playboy prince.

(13:24):
They're going to send this girl whoso far we still don't know her
name, which I always find fascinating. They never say her name, the
girl's name at the beginning. Sothey're sending her to cover it because nobody
else wants to work at Christmas,and it just seems to me like everybody
would want the royal beat and they'dbe like, I don't need to be
with my family, I'm going toAldovia. Yeah. I was really confused
by that one. I was like, what you mean, there's nobody else

(13:46):
to go to? Here? Sendingthe junior copy editor to cover the royal
family, Like there isn't a tabloidreporter in the world who would like,
what other stories are going Amelia.You get a call from somebody that you
work for and they say, Amelia, there is you. I need to

(14:07):
send you to London to cover theRoyal family for Christmas. You're gonna stay
at the castle. You're gonna bethere at the castle, going to be
in the press conference room. Imean, is your answer all, well,
I promise my mom and dad Ifeel for Christmas. I mean,
honestly, I would probably be like, hey, mom and dad, you

(14:28):
guys want to like find a wayto go to London for Christmas. We
can still have dinner together and Ican do my job, because I'd probably
still want to be like with myfamily for Christmas somehow, Oh my gosh,
Amelia, you are so lame.I would be so out of here.
I would be like, you guys, have a good Christmas. We
will FaceTime. It's just one Christmas. I can't believe your answer was I
want to take my family with me. I would want to be with my

(14:52):
family for Christmas and still do myjob. But I feel like probably most
people would just go oh, mostpeople would just go wait. And I
want to point out I want topoint out, Amelia in your defense that
was the most hallmark answer that youcould have given. Thank you. Okay,

(15:16):
so she has to go. Also, I'm wondering, okay, I
hate the way she pronounces Aldovia.She says it like Aldovia, and it
really bothered me the whole time.And I wonder if so she's not American
the actress, And I wonder ifthat's part of why her performance bugged you,
is because her accent was a littlebit off. No, No,

(15:39):
what bothered me is she had onefacial expression the entire time, which was
confusion and fear. And so yeah, I'll get I'll get in a little
deeper as you point out a coupleof points down the road about what I
specifically didn't like about her performance.I understand though, that having to carry

(16:00):
that American accent these foreign actors,oh, it is flatten their voices and
it flattens their face too sometimes.So I get that, and yeah,
and so yeah, I'll get towhere you're going to. All Right,
So she's talking to her work bestiesagain about she's got this big assignment and

(16:21):
blah blah blah, and they're like, oh my gosh, she's a hot
prince. You know, this isgoing to be so great, and she's
like, but I'm still I'm notlooking for a relationship. I'm still heartbroken.
And they're like, he dumped youa year ago, you're fine,
and like they never talk about thisman again. And she also she is
like, this guy is This guy'sgorgeous. He's tall and gorgeous. He

(16:42):
is a prince and he's going tobe a king. He lives in a
freaking castle. Everybody in the worldwants him. And she's like, I'm
just a little too, I'm toosad to go to a foreign country and
fall in love with a rich,handsome, kind print Like okay, girl
like that. She deserves to besingle, playboy prince who has no sense

(17:07):
of responsibility. Come on, Imean sure, but she could change him.
She didn't even have the thought Icould change him, that's true.
I just I'm fascinated by the factwe never talked about this man again in
the whole movie. Just a littleexpositions, like you know that she's not
looking. She's not going there withher eye on the prince because she's not

(17:29):
that kind of girl. Amelia.So after this conversation, she has to
go buy the diner that her dadruns and let him know that she's not
going to be home for Christmas becauseshe has to go to Albovia. Her
dad is you know we've talked aboutthis before that the parents give like the

(17:51):
most platitude, boring advice in ChristmasLand, and you're supposed to be like
wow. So his advice here wasstay true to your dreams and success will
follow, and well that's no.But also, whenever he gives advice in
this movie, there's like this panflute sound. I didn't notice, and

(18:14):
I'm like, is this like misterMiyagi music? Like is it? I
don't understand what's happening here? Wow? I didn't notice that that is hilarious.
Well, well, I was watchinghim give that completely generic advice that
she flipped out over, like oh, you're oh so wise dad. But
in my mind I was thinking,because I was going over the intro rules

(18:36):
for the podcast, like what doI want to explain to people? I
was imagining the writers because I knowno good writer writes that, you know
what I mean? They write somethingof probably five sentencesn't needed to be cut
anyways, No good writer writes that, So I'm trying to imagine the beautiful
thing that the original writer wrote,and then the ucer or the writer's table

(19:02):
experience going oh, I love yourmetaphor here about flowers and butterflies in the
sky. But take it all outand just put in this. Let's stay
true to your dreams. Yes,this is too pretty, This is too
beautiful, all right. She isimmediately like on a plane, on a

(19:26):
bus. She's in Aldovia. Uh. She gets there. There's a bunch
of press. They're all going tothis, you know, same press conference
to find out where the prince is. What's going to happen? Is he
going to be crowned? She goesto get in a cab. This dude
comes out of nowhere, takes hercab and she just yells at him like
selfish jerk, which apparently I don'tknow, was that the fear, was

(19:47):
that the suggestive dialogue, I don'tknow. She gets to the castle,
which is this sort of like vaguelylike alpine Germanic looking, So I don't
know if that's supposed to give usa hint of the area of Europe we're
in. I will say this thatI Ruby and I my daughter Ruby and
I went to see the nun twothe other day, and I think it's

(20:07):
the same castle from the nun too. It's like a monastery or something like
that that they filmed that. Okay, so Hallmark movie, horror movie,
same location. These days, itseems like everybody's talking, but no one
is actually listening to the things they'resaying. Critical thinking isn't dead, but

(20:33):
it's definitely low on oxygen. Joinme Kira Davis on Just Listen to Yourself
every week as we reason through issuesbig and small, critique our own ideas,
and learn to draw our talking pointsall the way out to their logical
conclusions. Subscribe to Just Listen toYourself with Kira Davis and FCB Radio podcast
on Apple, on Spotify, iHeart, or wherever you get your podcasts.

(20:56):
They get to the press conference,which looks like it's just in some like
hotel tell, you know, conferenceroom, and they get up to the
front. The press is there,and the you know, the Royal Press
secretary or whatever gets up there andjust goes, Prince Richard is unavailable,
but the coronation will take place atthe Christmas eve ball. That's pretty much

(21:18):
all they say. And they're like, well, what is What's happening.
Are they going to reschedule? Andthey're just like no, bye. The
room explodes by the way that pressgaggle explodes. They are so put out
by the fact that they cannot.I was like, these people are saucy?
Is this I guess maybe this ishow the press is in Europe or

(21:40):
Aldovia. Clearly they've all had totravel a long time to get to this
tiny, isolated kingdom of Aldovia.But they were very put out and it
was almost like someone was holding cuecards, like at an SNL taping or
something like murmur now everybody murmur murmurmurmur, murmur. The Prince will not
be here. Boom murmur murmur.And I think it was supposed to be

(22:03):
like they are fed up with PrinceRichard and his antics because he is always
pulling stuff like this, like notshowing up. He's like the Joe Biden
of royal politics. Just like,not there once again, Prince Richard.
So everybody else just gets on theirlittle tour bus and heads back to the

(22:27):
hotel, all the other press.But oh, we know her name by
now, by the way, it'sAmber. So Amber just goes well,
I can't go home empty handed she'snever had a story before. But she's
the only member of the entire presscorps who's like, well, I'm going
to get a story. Everyone elseis like, well, I guess I'll
just go home, But she's like, I'm gonna get a story, right,

(22:49):
She's the only one that decided,like I could clearly just freely roam
around this castle and find a story. That's how reporters do it. And
next time we have Kinsey on totalk about royal coverage, let's ask her.
You know that's her style of gettinga story on the royal family appearance.

(23:11):
Can you just be like, actually, instead of leaving, I'm just
going to walk around the castle andsee what happens. Yeah, well,
I you know what, neither ofus have ever tried it before, have
we in we've never had a royalscoop. So okay, well, first
of all, nice try, butI'm not going to tell you what I've
done in different castles. I knowwhat you've done in different bathrooms, So

(23:32):
you do. I do. Ameliaand I first met by going to see
at singing porter in a men's bathroomin Charlotte, North Carolina. Moving on,
that's the story for another day inthe castle and she's just like wandering
around taking pictures on her phone.And the security guard goes up and is

(23:55):
like, oh, you're American.You must be Princess Emily's new tutor.
Let's find missus. Abril doesn't likeask for any ID. It's just like,
oh, an American, I betyou're the tutor. Okay, So
she just goes with it. ObviouslyI'm the tutor. Well, she's in
the castle, you know, andso if she's in there wandering around,

(24:17):
she clearly belongs there. So Imean they just put two and two together
and yeah, and then said areyou in fact four and feeding her the
answer so yes, yes. Theygave her everything she needed to know.
She's like, yes, yes Iam. I am the tutor. Now,

(24:38):
I mean, of course they're inChristmas Land. You have to suspend
all kinds of disbelief, of course, obviously, But in my mind,
I'm thinking this is nothing more thana mere phone call for somebody to figure
her out. Like how far isshe thinking she's gonna go with this bruise?

(25:00):
Right? And like I've you know, at every job, they know
they check your ID or something,but not here and out of the Palace
of Valdovia. Nope, No,maybe they don't have background checking in Aldovia.
No, So they take her tomissus April, who's like the head
of the household or whatever, andshe's you know, whining, she hates
the press. They're finally out ofhere. Oh, doesn't occur to her

(25:23):
that obviously this could be a memberof the press. So anyway, she's
Martha. Now they think she's Marthathe tutor. They take her in to
meet everybody. She walks in,so she's with the queen and the uh
turns out, shocking twist, theselfish jerk who stole the cab is Prince

(25:45):
Richard. That's crazy to me becausewhen I saw him with that terrible fake
beard push her aside and get intothe cab and they had a contentious exchange.
The one thing I thought was,well, at least she'll never have
to see him again, am Iright? Right? They obviously put that
scene in for no reason, iswhat I thought. And now look,

(26:07):
I mean then she did see himagain. It's crazy. What As she's
leaving the room, she backs intothis vase and instead of saying and it
shatters into a billion pieces and insteadof saying like I'm so sorry, you
know whatever she says was that expensive, which is a I don't know,
And the queen was like, it'sjust a fifteenth century piece, and everyone

(26:30):
was so very casual about it.I have questions though about why this fifteenth
century piece would be on such anunstable, you know thing right by the
door. To be fair, right, yeah, I mean to be fair,
but yeah it was. It remindedme. I thought about you,
Amelia when she did that, notbecause you would fall and knock over a

(26:53):
very expensive piece antique, but becauseyou're always like, why is it In
these movies, these American girls getto the castle and then just like forget
how to do everything. They don'teven know how to walk anymore, right,
So I think, and this iswhere I was gonna say, it
kind of goes to your thing aboutlike her one facial expression, because I
think that's part of that's what theydo in these movies. They have the

(27:15):
American women go there and then actlike they've never been outside of their home
before. So I think part ofit is I mean, they probably told
her to act have this like expressionlike everything is brand new, you know?
That mean? Is that maybe that'swhat she was doing. You're right,

(27:37):
but the everything brand new face isthe same as the angry face.
It's the same as the confused face. It's the same as the I'm I'm
distressed, I'm jealous, I'm inlove watery. Yeah, everything was,
every expression was absolutely the same.She was dull anyway, keep going.

(27:59):
Yeah, so we should also mentionhere that Princess Emily, who she's tutoring,
is in a wheelchair. So shemakes some comments about you know her
her brother Richard is very sweet withher, and well, so she's either
in a wheelchair or sometimes she useslike little crutches. Her brother, you
know, swings her around in ahug and stuff, and her mom thinks

(28:21):
it's too rough, but you know, he likes to. She has spina
bifida, she does, so youknow, her mom thinks that, like,
you know, the big hugs area little too rough, but you
know she likes it. And alreadythat this is this is already like first
major departure right from Hallmark Land,which is like a crippled child, disabled

(28:45):
child. We would never allow suchimperfection. You know, I'm using that
in air quotes obviously because I believeGod creates this all perfectly, but we
would never allow the idea of struggle. Right, this is a struggle for
a kid inside of this story.So already I was like, oh,
this is kind of dark. She'sshe's disabled. Now, she's hardly disabled.

(29:08):
She's like Christmas Land disabled, Likeshe gets around just fine. But
yeah, I was like, oh, okay, this is dark. Yeah,
but we're seeing like a sweeter sideof Prince Richard, Like maybe there's
more to him than this playboy princeblah blah blah. So just keep that
in mind. Maybe he's not whoyou think he was. All right.

(29:30):
So the next morning, Amber goesdown to you know, start tutoring Emily,
and Emily hands over this absolutely psychoticdrawing of missus April where she's got
like thanks, she's like holding knivesor something. And I am here for

(29:51):
it, partially because one of mypet peeves in general about TV shows movies
is they have a drawing the childdid and clearly an adult did it,
supposedly by a child, and itlooks like maybe a kid did it in
this face. In this instance,it is absolutely psychotic. I don't know,

(30:12):
google it, watch it. Itmade me laugh. I don't know,
maybe there's something wrong with me.It wasn't crazy, it was crazy.
But this is how we know.This is how we know Emily is
she's precocious. Everybody, she's aprecocious thirteen year old. Maybe this is
why there was a fear warning,because honestly, if a kid that I

(30:33):
was babysitting through this, I wouldbe maybe a little concerned. And we
know that she's scared away all ofher previous tutors, so right, of
course, and then well, goforward, I'll comment later, go forward.
So so they're sitting there doing somelessons. Amber obviously has no idea

(30:56):
anything about math. She's just like, yeah, that looks good. So
there's doing the work and Princess Emilyturns to her. So here's an example
of bad exposition. She just turnsto her and goes, if you're wondering
what happened to me, I havespine a biffy. I was like,
wow, okay, this is thisis this, And this is also the

(31:18):
scene where I decided this actress doesn'tshe's not getting the movie that she's in
because they have this I'm sure you'regonna go but they have this exchange Emily
out of nowhere, I have Tina. And then and then all of a
sudden, she's sad. The littlegirl is the one that brings it up,
and then she's sad about bringing itup. She's like, you probably

(31:38):
think I'm pathetic. Everyone thinks I'mpathetic, which is, of course,
nobody said. There was absolutely noindication that anyone thought this. She's the
one who drew the psycho picture ofthe assistant lady, and she's the one
who keeps driving people away. Butshe rolls her wheelchair to the window to

(31:59):
look out, and she's by theway. This little actress was really great.
She was great, and she waslooking out the window and feeling sad.
She says, I bet you thinkI'm pathetic, and our Amber Martha
all of a sudden, just it'slike I couldn't see the change on her

(32:19):
face. I just heard the switchand the dialogue, and that's what I
was like. She doesn't have thechops here, but she just all of
a sudden rose out of her chair, same expression on her face, went
over to her and she was like, actually, I think you're brave.
And then that's it. Now theice is broken. They're best friends.
Now, yeah, but this wasa moment where I was like, here
is a moment for some genuine emotion, albeit manufacture, but that's how these

(32:45):
things go. And the girl isgiving everything, and I just didn't even
see it register on Rose MacIvor's face. And maybe you're right, maybe it
was the accent. It's like you'respending so much mental energy maintaining that accent
that you don't have anything left foryour face. But I just was like

(33:06):
this lady, like this kid getswhat movie she's in. She's hamming it
up for dear life, Like,get in there, girl, get it.
Yeah, all right. So,while she's staring longingly out the window
feeling sorry for herself, they seePrince Richard out there, who is practicing
his archery as one does. Sothey go out there to see him.

(33:30):
And here's one of the first suggestivedialogue things. Is Emily, Princess Emily
wants to give it a try,and he's like, okay, but don't
let mom see you or she choppedmy head off, and she's like,
better than chopping something else off.And then and then she's like Amber's like
Princess Emily, She's like, Imeant like his ear. And so first

(33:52):
of all, I think it's betterto chop someone's head off than their ear.
Is that what you're suggesting? Secondof all, that's not event Third
of all, why why why wasit? I? Okay, several times
in this movie I hadn't remind myselfI'm watching a Netflix movie. I'm not
watching Hallmark Channel. I understand they'lltake some liberties. But if I had

(34:17):
heard anything else in that movie thatwas similar, maybe I would have just
dismissed it. But there was Therewere no other sexual references in the movie,
I don't think, and it wasn'tThere was one. Okay, well,
okay, you'll have to remind me, but it wasn't like this just
was out of the blue. Itwas completely pointless. It didn't add anything

(34:42):
to the dialogue, and it robbedsomething of the sweetness. Here's one revelation
I had about Hallmark. Why andwhy Hallmark is a successful such a successful
formula. The writers are older andso this is to me a script,
And I could be wrong. Ididn't look up the age and details of

(35:05):
the writer, but to me,this is a type of script that gets
written or made by a younger personwho has a different idea of what sweet
values and morals are these days,we would think it's like it's sweet that
you know, people wait to getinto bed together for a month or something.
And it just because our moral landscapehas shrunk so much. What seems

(35:32):
sweet and normal to I think youngerwriters is actually, you know, it
is inappropriate, but we've lost thesense of what is appropriate, so that
bleed it can bleed over into thesescripts. So I'm just listening to this,
I'm thinking a twenty one year oldor a thirty one year old writer
writing that it's probably like, well, we didn't make the joke, we

(35:53):
didn't say it out loud, sothis is like just a cute little adult
thing. But it but it's it'sstill like very innocent and it's but the
formula, the magic of Hallmark isthat it is pure innocence. It is
purely, cheesily, ridiculously to ridiculouslevels innocent, and that is what people

(36:19):
respond to. Absolutely, And it'sa weird joke for like, how old
is Princess? Is thirteen? Something? Hold is she thirteen? Yeah?
To be making to her older brother, like it's it's weird. Yes,
it was again all kinds of weird, just all kinds of like, oh
this this is just a little onefor the adults putting it in there and

(36:40):
not really thinking thinking it through.But think about the way kids, like
teenagers are represented these days in films. They're all sassy, and you know
how I hate this a million Youknow, I hate a bad kid on
a TV show because I want toget out of my banking spoon. And
that's how they all are. Youwatch your favorite shows on TV now and
they all the adults have children whotalk back to them and are rude and

(37:02):
sassy, and we're supposed to justlaugh at it. So that is the
again, the approach that that writeris taking. Yep, all right.
So after Emily, you know,she of course hits a bull's eye,
and then Amber wants to have atry, and of course there's like a
little moment where Prince Richard is showingher how to do it, and they're
standing closed and they you know,have a little moment where they look at

(37:24):
each other. Then Amber goes tosmile at him and then turns her entire
body lets the arrow go, andit goes into a priceless painting. So
it's two things Amber has went twothings in like twelve hours that she's been
there or something. Yeah. Iwas like, okay, wow, yeah,

(37:44):
you know. So Princess Emily hashad this huge turnaround where she just
adores Amber now and wants to beher best friend forever, and so she
has invited her to like a friendsand family only cocktail party tonight that night.
So they go down to this cocktailparty, and I thought it was
hilarious because when as they kind ofpanned through the room, they sort of

(38:07):
pause for a moment on this conversationthe Queen is having with the Prime Minister
very loudly at this social event,and the Prime Minister's like, is Prince
Richard going to abdicate the throne?It's not the place, This is not
the time or place. No,And the Queen's like, no, he's
not. But it was just Ithought that was funny that, like,

(38:28):
that's not appropriate and Amber also notappropriate. How Amber just be walking around
the castle with her phone out,just like recording things so openly. Yeah,
yep, so let's see, uh, Richard is let's see what's going

(38:49):
on. Richard's So after this,Richard he does he come in and then
is this the event. This isX come in here too. Yeah.
So here we meet Simon and Sophia. So here's yeah, here's the big
event tonight. We meet Simon.So Simon is Richard's cousin, so if

(39:20):
Richard were to abdicate, it's thenext male would inherit the throne. So
first of all we get this littleyou know, how unfair it has to
be a man, so he kindof wants Richard to you know, abdicate
he can take the throne. Andthen we have Sophia, who is you

(39:43):
know, I think she's a ladySophia something, who is Richard's ex and
she is all about becoming queen someday. So she is trying to kind of
weasel her way back into Richard's goodgraces because she wants to be queen.
But here's what we get where weget another of the innuendo moments because he
come Simon comes over and is like, oh hello, Emily, blah blah

(40:06):
blah, and Emily's like, Idon't have time for this nonsense. This
guy's a jerk, and he makessome comment about like, oh, Emily,
did you invite the help this year? And She's like this is Martha.
She's my friend, she's my tutor, and she's like, oh,
hello, Simon. He's like,you may call me Royal Highness Simon blah
blah blah. And Richard hears andis like, oh, I've always thought

(40:30):
that people who need to be calledby their title remind me of people who
drive ferraris. And he's like,well, what's wrong with my Ferrari?
And he's like, Oh, nothing'swrong with it. It's just what they're
compensating for, right, yes.Another see that's another that is a line
written by someone who doesn't have childrenor has ever had to care for children.

(40:53):
And you see that stuff pop upin Disney animated films sometimes right where
they're like, this is a littleone for the adults. And as an
adult, when you're parenting and you'resitting in a movie with a child like
that, it's like, well,I don't actually appreciate this, Like I
don't need the double entendre to enjoythis movie, and it feels like a

(41:14):
you know, a backdoor to somethingmore inappropriate for my child. Just do
the innocent thing. That's fine,we don't need these, we get it.
Simon's a jerk. He drives aFerrari. He wants to be king,
he wants you know, the princesssloppy seconds. He's a self interested
jerk. We got it the secondhe walked in with a stupid suit and
tie and his dumb accent. Yeah, did Paul Revere really say the British

(41:42):
are coming? And how is GeorgeWashington chosen to leave the First American Army.
Join us for the Growing Patriot podcast, a place for curious kids to
ask the big questions about our nation'shistory and get kid friendly answers from the
country's top experts. Help your childlearn about and cherish America's exceptional history.
Subscribe to Growing Patriots on Apple Podcastsor wherever you get your podcasts today.

(42:06):
So this one. The only thingthat bothered me less about this one is
that it was between two grown menmaking comments. Like girl making a weird
joke like that to her brother wasdifferent. But yes, like neither of
them needed to be in the movieat all, But at least two grown
men, you know, making alike righting each other was different. It
should have been a joke from LadySophia if anything. All right, So

(42:32):
later the family's hanging around Richard's playingthe piano, and she's just like recording
him playing the piano, like noone's gonna notice, and apparently they don't.
So we get to they're putting ornamentson the tree, and the king,
King, the late beloved King Richardloved handmade ornaments. So the Queen

(42:52):
takes out this giant acorn ornament andshe's like, oh, he made this
last year and I found it afterhe died, and I'm like, that
is I mean, it's big.It's like the size of a football.
Okay, maybe not quite, butlike it's a giant acorn. And Lady
Sophia comes barging in and kind oflike ruins the moment. She's trying to

(43:15):
get all of the attention, soit's it's just a little awkward. So
Amber later is up in her roomand she keeps just like a running document
of her thoughts at all these photosand stuff on her laptop and it just
seems a little bit silly to me. And as I was writing that down

(43:35):
in my notes, Emily Prince Emilycomes in the next morning and totally knows
what's going on. She's like,listen, I know your name's Amber.
I hacked into your computer, yourpat You literally wrote your password down,
so it's obvious what's going on here. But here's the deal. Okay,
well this is another hallmark choke though, right, somebody leaving their computer open.

(43:59):
I mean, this is a versionof it, leaving your computer open
with you know, the the incriminatingdocuments. You know. I always think
of Hot Sassafras. We use atravel blogger leaving his travel blog open criticizing
this bed and breakfast as he's fallingin love with it, you know,
the owner's daughter. So this wasanother version. Thank goodness for Emily.

(44:20):
Not only does she fulfill the roleof the precocious trial child, but she
is an exposition dumper and we needthose in these films. Yep, so
she knows, and so Amber justshe gets this really mopey look and she's
like, I'll just pack my stuff. Yeah, and she's like, I

(44:40):
I'm gonna get this story. Ican't go home and dehanded. And now
she's gone this far. And thenthat was another instance where it was like
there's this now there there She's like, well, I'll just get my things
and go. Okay, are yousad? Are you embarrassed? Are you
do you feel a sham aim thatyou tricked Emily, like they're nothing registers.

(45:02):
Yeah, and there's not like alike she doesn't try to say like
you know, I'm so sorry,or like listen if you don't tell you
know, please don't tell anybody,or like give me a head start to
leave the castle, or like youthink there'd be some kind of something,
but it's actually Emily who's like,listen, if you write the truth about

(45:23):
my brother actually being a decent humanbeing, then I won't tell anybody that
you're an undercover reporter. I'll letthem keep thinking you're my tutor. And
it's like that actually should have beenAmber's idea. But okay, but now
we get a baking scene, whichis our favorite, so you know whatever,

(45:43):
hang on my mic. Oh mymic was muted and I couldn't un
mute it. Uh, we gotthe baking scene, and I do want
to give props to Netflix for actuallymaking it a baking scene. Typically,
when we're in Hallmark movies, thecookies are already baked and and they come
out of the oven with the icingon a lot of times, so it's

(46:04):
always really weird to watch them quotebake when the cookies are pee baked,
but we actually watched them cutting thecookies out. I can't help but think
that there was somebody who was aHallmark fan on that set and said,
Hey, we're actually gonna bake.That's how our movie's gonna be different.
We're gonna put in sexual innuendo andwe're actually gonna bake. But they have

(46:27):
a nice little moment she talked,you know, Princess Emily talks about missing
her dad, and you know,they bond, right because Amber's mom died.
Amber lost her mom. They kindof you know, she talks about
her loss and they you know,good bond. Meanwhile, Sophia is telling
Ben how she's never really gotten overhim and she doesn't think that he's ever

(46:49):
gotten over her, and he's like, actually I did. But thank you
so much for your concern, whichis actually all about you wanting to be
queen. I appreciate that so much, but at least like, okay,
but I'm gonna give it to Sophiathough, because she's going after what she
wants and she is being very aggressiveand decisive, unlike Amber, who's just

(47:09):
sort of letting things happen to her. She very much is all right.
The next day is the Big VillageFestival, which is another trope that we
can check off our list. PrinceRichard is a no show. He's supposed
to be like opening the festival,and he just doesn't show up, And

(47:30):
to be honest, I would bepretty mad. It turns out that he
is playing with the orphans, becauseevery you know, every one of these
Prince things seems to have village orphans, and I mean, I get that,
But also the mom has every rightto be mad because he should have
been there to do the opening speechlike his dad always did. His mom

(47:52):
is also mad that he disappeared foran entire year, and again she has
every right to be mad about that. Okay, but to be fair,
he sure he disappeared for a year, but he was actually just learning how
to train in the black magic artsand martial arts and protecting the good people

(48:13):
of Gotham for that year. Okay, Okay, Well, when a rich,
handsome guy disappears, that's what he'sdoing. He's going to train to
become a superhero. Okay, buthis mom would have known that, because
no, no, because a lotyou know, people don't know about Bruce
Wayne and the difference between Bruce Wayneand Batman. I mean, Batman has

(48:37):
a mask and Bruce Wayne doesn't.He the Prince has a beard and maybe
you know, and so that threwpeople off. I'm just saying he was
obviously definitely doing superhero stuff while hewas gone for that year. My mom
could have thank you, that's adifferent Hallmark movie though that movie's on Lifetime.

(49:02):
So at the same time that PrinceRochel was getting yelled at, or
maybe it's the next day, Idon't remember, she Amber decides that she
wants to take Princess Emily's sledding,and Princess Emily goes, do you really
think I can do it? Andat first I'm like, well, that's
a dumb question. Who can't gosledding? There's gravity? And then I
was like, oh, wait,she actually does have like a disability that

(49:24):
she could injure herself, so maybethat's a fair question and they need to
actually find out if that's safe.Yeah. And by the way, that
Hill was completely inappropriate for her firsttime to Bogginer, who is also disabled.
Absolutely not. I am an experiencedCanadian to Boginer and I would not
have taken that well. Yeah,and then Emily does this horrifying thing where

(49:49):
she like pretends that she's fallen offand really injured herself. I was like,
oh, this movie really is dark. It did did need a fright
warning at the beginning. So shefalls off, Amber checks on her.
It turns out, ha, Iwas just kidding. I didn't break my
spine and I'm now I'm a quadriplegic. And at the same time, so

(50:15):
they're like laughing in the snow.Richard rides by on a horse sees them
having fun. They have a snowballfight, of course ends up with him
like tackling Amber. They have likeanother moment, Yeah, a moment.
It's it could have doubled as thefalling off the ladder moment. We didn't
get a fall off the ladder moment, but we did get a fall to

(50:35):
the ground moment because of a snowballfight, which was, by the way,
the second fight, the second snowballfight, because he had a snowball
fight with the orphans. And I'lltell you what I the sign of a
good Christmas movie is if there's asnowball fight and it makes me smile every
time. It was good. Sowhile they're like frolicking and he's got her

(50:59):
pinned in the know and it's alittle bit romantic. Simon and Sophia come
by in like a horse drawn sleigh, and they are just disgusted by the
amount of frivolity going on, like, honestly, we just get it together,
you three. Yeah, Yeah,they're obviously there is It's like,

(51:22):
we can't have fun people in chargeof al dao Via. That's what this
American tutor has brought fun Simon.Simon's kind of trying to put the moves
on Sophia. Sophia is not havingit, and I'm really not sure why
she even got into the sleigh withhim in the first place, because she
clearly doesn't like him. Yeah,I know, I think maybe just the

(51:45):
thought she thought maybe he would helpher win back. Maybe. I don't
know. I don't know why they'retogether. They're both the evil people.
I'm not sure if I wrote itdown, I'm not sure when she says
it, but she made some commentabout obviously Simon's to put the moves on
Sophia because all he's all he hasever wanted is whatever Simon has, whether
it's the throne or something anything else. Yeah. So so the next oh

(52:12):
so, when they get back tothe castle, the queen is like,
I cannot believe that you took mydisabled daughter out on a toboggan on this
crazy hill. And I'm like,well, fair enough, and then she's
like, without bringing me, wecan all have fun, and I'm like,
oh, okay. Actually I wasgonna kind of be on her side
there, but okay. Another momentwhere I was disappointed with the with the

(52:32):
Rose mc ivor, the actress.And this was a moment where I realized
what makes a Hallmark queen a Hallmarkqueen. It is a sense. It's
an underlying sense of joy, andthe only thing I saw with this actress
is an underlying sense of dread.So there's in that moment, there's got
to be some kind of feeling youhave for her that she is like she

(52:54):
realizes that they've just had a lotof fun, and there's something fun and
joy full about her that is irresistible, which would make the queen, you
know, reconsider, which would beokay. You know, I was young
and exuberant once too, and that'strue, and it just didn't happen.
We couldn't get it because the actressdoesn't give the other people the thing that

(53:16):
they need to make their dialogue work. So it does seem like an about
face for the queen. But ifwe had an actress who was giving her
Yeah, but we've just had areally joyful and wonderful time, and that's
what I love about life is joy. Then you then it doesn't make the

(53:37):
cheesy dialogue work. I'm gonna pauseright here, Amelia, because I have
an issue. My battery is aboutto die and only one of my ports
is working. So here's I'm gonnahave to do. I'm unplug my sound
system and we're gonna have to goto computer sound for the rest of this.

(53:58):
And I'm just not sure if it'sgonna interrupt the streamer not, so
let me try, all right.So the next morning Adventures there are Shenanigans,
and this kind of cracked me upbecause she sees Prince Richard go for
a horseback ride in the snow,and so she's like, I'm just gonna

(54:19):
grab this horse and follow him.She has never been on a horse before
outside of riding in Central Park,we find out later, so she just
gets on a horse and goes.She ends up getting lost she falls off
the horse, the horse takes off, and then there's a wolf, Like,
wow, this is a lot.It's like so confused. I was

(54:43):
so confused during that scene. Iwas like, what am I watching?
It reminded me of what was themovie we watched. It was a recent
one where she like was on theprincess on the plane and the plane got
stranded and then she goes, ohwith Princess Amelia, Yeah, jingle bell
princess, and she walks through thelike all leaves the plane and then is

(55:07):
ended up in the middle of thewoods and right out. But I'm like,
hey, why is she riding?This is the first time on a
horse, and she takes the mostgiant horse, like it's a Clydesdale,
It's the biggest, right. Whywas the horse even like saddled and ready?
You don't just leave a horse fullysaddled, just standing there in a

(55:27):
barn, Like, how did sheeven know how to like steer it or
move it or guide it, oreven where she was going? If it
was saddled, somebody else was planningto ride it, weren't they curious about
where the horse went? And thenthe horse bucks her off in the middle
of the woods at night and she'ssitting there, and I had seen there

(55:52):
was one moment that was like ahorror movie moment where she's in the woods
and then you see a figure likejust sort of of like cross in front
of the camera eyeline, but it'sobscure and you can't see, you don't
know what it is. It's liketotally something you would see in a horror
movie. It was just such ajarring scene, like it did not belong

(56:15):
in the movie. And then allof a sudden, there's a wolf there.
It was, it was, itwas, And this whole thing takes
like ninety seconds. Yes, yeah, it's not she falls off the horse.
There's a wolf and you're just likewhat, yeah, it's not just
some adventure. And again going backto why this actress, and again I

(56:36):
want to point out I think Rosemciber is a good actress. I've seen
her in other things. But whateverher issue was with this, it's like
I didn't even see the fear onher face, like you're about to get
devoured by a wolf, you shouldbe peeing your pants, And she just
got the same look on her faceas she did when she was telling the
Queen that she went to boggining.Anyway, Prince Richard comes out of the

(57:02):
middle of nowhere, fires his pistolinto the air to scare the wolf away.
Well, okay, it's a pistol. Where why, Hey, this
is Hallmark I have I've never seena gun in a Hallmark movie. This
is definitely not a Hallmark movie.Yeah, I've never seen a gun in
these movies. I mean, thearrow was like, that was violent enough.

(57:24):
That arrow went through a window andnearly hit someone in the head,
and that is as close to violenceas I've seen in these Christmas movies.
But what the hell was he doingwith a just riding around at night with
a pistol. Well, okay,so if you are riding around and you
need a firearm for protection from wolves, probably a pistol's not going to do

(57:46):
the trick. I mean, heyguy, hey, rifle of some kind.
Hey, if you're if you livein a place where riding around at
night means you'll come in contact withthe wolves, don't ride around night.
Right. Also, yes, let'sstart with that. Anyway, Anyway,

(58:08):
he saves her. She is buthe protected her. Yeah, I guess
she's grateful. We'll never know itdidn't register on her face. Yeah,
So he saved her, and hebrings her back to the like hunting lodge
on the castle grounds and poorts hersome whiskey, which I don't know do

(58:28):
we have have I guess we've hadalcoholic beverages before, we've had alcoholic beverages.
I question the tenacity with which shewas drinking this whiskey. She did
not stop drinking her life or deathexperience. Well, she kept sipping it
and sipping it, and I waslike, slow down. So he talked

(58:50):
about how the last time he'd beenat the hunting lodge was with his dad
and he had just told his dadthat he was going to renounce the throne
and they had a big fight.And then he talked to her about like
how he and Sophia had broken upbecause she sold a story to the tabloids

(59:14):
and so he hates the tabloids andshe's like, oh my goodness, I
am the tabloids. And then hetalks to her. He shows her his
dad's old journal where his dad wrotethis super weird riddle about an acorn and
like the ground and I don't know, it's weird, and then they almost
kiss and then he hears the horseslike neighing and winnying outside, so he

(59:37):
goes to check on them, andthen she finds this weird secret drawer in
the desk. It just pops open. I was it was so easy to
find secret passages and locations as itis in Hallmark movies, like in real
life. My real life would beso fun. But she just happened to

(59:59):
drop something and looked at the deskand oh, here's a latch that looks
like it doesn't belong. Naturally,I will just touch it or move it,
and naturally it opens a secret.No one else has ever seen it
before, no one else. Igrew up in a Victorian house and only
tell you I was always looking forsecret passageways and secret whatever. Never never,

(01:00:20):
never want. I dream about secretpassageways. I dream about finding them.
Never found one. But you know, but that is the that's that's
Christmas Land privilege. Though these daysit seems like everybody's talking, but no
one is actually listening to the thingsthey're saying. Critical thinking isn't dead,
but it's definitely low on oxygen.Join me, Kira Davis on just listen

(01:00:45):
to yourself every week as we reasonthrough issues big and small, critique our
own ideas, and learn to drawour talking points all the way out to
their logical conclusions. Subscribe to JustListen to Yourself with Kia Davis, an
FCB radio podcast on Apple, onSpotify, iHeart, or wherever you get
your podcasts. So she she kindof like looks at the papers that are

(01:01:07):
in this little file folder, butdoesn't really doesn't have time because basically what's
happened is there's a search party that'sfound them. So she like shoves this
file folder in her backpack whatever itis. They go back to the castle.
So later that night she goes throughthe file and basically Prince Richard is

(01:01:28):
adopted boo, and it is likethe adoption certificates I must make comment on
kudos to the prop master. Theseadoption certificates, official Royal adoption certificates look
like my Cabbage Patch Kids adoption certificate. Yeah. Yeah, they were made

(01:01:50):
in like Microsoft paint. They reallywere. I was like, any reporter
should really have to verify these firsts. They looked like they came with the
doll in the package. Yeah.So she video calls her besties back home
and is like, I'm not tellingthe editor excuse me, see it?

(01:02:13):
So after all this, after allthis work, she's like scoop of a
lifetime, I'm not telling you.Yeah again, something that works if the
actress is on board with the script. But I didn't see this actress on
board with the script. I feltlike everybody else knew what movie they were
in, and she didn't quite getit. Again, that is the thing.

(01:02:37):
We make fun of the Hallmark brandand the cheesiness and the silliness of
those actors or actresses and they alllook so, you know, like just
all American and cutesy, and butthere is a reason for that. It
sells a necessarily problematic dialogue, right, The person sells it. So again,

(01:03:00):
I can go with that development.If I'm seeing the actress struggle with
these things, and seeing the actressstruggle with well, I actually do love
this guy. I'll say there waslike zero chemistry between these people. Yeah,
she didn't have like an emotional awakeningand then go oh, I can't
do it. After all. Shewas just like, I don't think I'm

(01:03:21):
going to turn the story in.No. I think there were a couple
of moments where that's what we weresupposed to see where she was like looking
at him, and maybe we werelike there was you know, there's a
moment where she kind of sees himgetting close with Sophia and I think that's
supposed to bother her, or there'smoments when they're bonding over the sister,
and it just he was giving everything, by the way, Beverly, but

(01:03:45):
he was selling it. He knewwhat movie he was in. He sold
every second. Alice Kraig his motherthe Queen, who is also the Queen
of the Borgs from Star Trek NextGeneration, playing one of the most iconic
characters in the entire Star Trek series. She knew what kind of movie she

(01:04:05):
was in, Like, I justwas so disappointed with this actress. And
again, I think my disappointment isthat I think she's she's actually a very
good actress. Yeah, all right, So she is just sort of frustrated
with the whole situation. She doesn'tknow what to do, goes to bed.

(01:04:27):
The next morning, she's wandering aroundthe castle taking pictures of everything like
she does, and sees Sophia talkingto Richard, and well, okay,
so for actually back up a second. First, Sophia is talking to Richard
Amber's not there, and she's like, I saw you come back last night
with that peasant. And Richard's like, you sound like a crazy person.

(01:04:51):
What's wrong with you? And she'slike, you know you need me.
Without me, your reign will failand blah blah blah. And he's just
like, you need to move on. I've moved on, just stop.
And she's like we need each other, blah blah, and she kind of
like grabs him and kisses him,and he's like, gross, get off
of me. But in the instantwhere their mouths are mashed together, Amber

(01:05:13):
walks by and sees it, andso she's all sad because they almost kissed
last night. Okay, I haveto make an observation about this moment because
it's something I noticed. He's sotall. He's so tall, And of
course all the actresses are tiny.Many of them probably don't even hit four
feet, I mean five feet,But I'm like, I'm pretty sure they
hit four feet I mean five it'sprobably a couple that are right around five

(01:05:36):
feet. This actress is significantly shorterthan him. She's got some nice heels
on, she got some good heelson, but he still towers above her.
So wallet was supposed to be aspontaneous moment where she kisses him because
the height difference was so terrible hehad to lean in, and I just
thought that, like he actually leanedin for that. Kids, he went

(01:05:57):
in for it. She didn't justtake it. But at the same time,
it's like, well, I understandhe's got to help the actress out
because he's so right. Anyway,another moment where Rose mckimer, where Amber
comes in, she sees them,and she's supposed to be registering some jealousy,
but it's just another like confused lookon her face. Right all right,

(01:06:21):
So here as a Christian girl,I am assuming that this part grated
on you like it did me.So Amber calls her dad for advice,
and she's like, she doesn't knowif she should turn the story in or
not, because she's like, it'sgonna really hurt somebody that doesn't deserve to
be hurt if I expose the secret, and so he goes, listen to

(01:06:41):
your heart. It will always tellyou the truth. Right, this is
what they But this is the onepiece of advice you get in these movies.
Consistently listen to your heart. ButI will I will give this caveat
because as Christians, we know theheart is wicked above all, everybody,
do not listen to your heart.Your heart makes terrible decisions. You already
know this. You already know straightup tells you your heart is deceitful.

(01:07:05):
Yeah, it will not tell youthe truth. You already know because you've
fallen for a dozen wrong people inyour life, Like you already know this.
However, in Christmas Land, everybodyhas a good heart. Even the
bad people, even the Simon's andSophia's of the world, are just really
misunderstood. If they got their ownmovie, if they got to spin off,

(01:07:27):
we would learn more about their childhoodhearts. So she can't follow her
heart because most people in Christmas Landare good. So just a note there.
There are two more Christmas Prince movies, so I know, and you
know, I'm not watching the nextone because she's pregnant in the next one,
and I just think, like you'vejumped the shark once you make their
main character pregnant. No, youwould die if you saw the childbirth scene.

(01:07:55):
I think I remember you talking aboutthis when it came out. They
do this thing where they do apain free childbirth. I think they call
it and instead of having contractions,they call them surges, and they're like,
just enjoy the surge. And thefirst time I ever watched it,
I literally was like, Kira woulddie if she Kira would be so angry.

(01:08:16):
There's a pregnant landing on the movieposter. I mean, she's pregnant
on the movie poster. Spoilers forhow Christmas Prince ends. But I think
that, yeah. I think thesecond one is the wedding and the third
one is the baby. All right. I was like, no, no,
but I don't do people who arenew, people who are new to
Kira Lan I have. I havegiven birth twice in my life, and

(01:08:41):
birth as a miracle. I don'tcare to see pregnant women on TV.
And I don't care to see reenactmentsof childbirth. I don't like it.
I don't know why I don't likeit. Yeah, but this, yeah,
that's not till the third movie.But yes, but anyway, what
I'm saying is you do find outmore about them anyway. Okay, let's
get back to this movie though.So her heart, follow your heart,

(01:09:04):
blah blah. Okay, So she'ssitting there with like just all of these
secret documents spread around her bed,and I get it. She's in her
own room, but still Richard comesto the door and it's like, hey,
let's go for a walk. Sothey go for a walk and she's
like, listen, I saw you. And Sophia like what is going on

(01:09:25):
here? And he's like, well, you know, I don't know what
you thought you saw, but Ireally like you. Blahbity blahbaty blah.
Again, I was like, whywhy does he like her? What is
it about her that he likes?That's another thing about a perfect Hallmark queen
is that you understand that does shethat her either she's one of two people

(01:09:49):
right, Like she's either anal retentiveor she's super joyful. So you understand
like that this exuberance or joy isunique and it is It is cheesy and
so cheesy is irresistible because it doesn'tfit in with like the rest of what's
going on. Again, she justdidn't have that you're supposed to see this

(01:10:12):
draw or when she's a anal retentiveworkhorse, like, well, at least
you can't appreciate. I'm thinking ofsome of our favorite you know, Hallmark
busy busy women, and at leastyou appreciate her tenacity and her passion.
And again this this actress had noneof this for the role. So I
didn't understand why you liked her.I don't either. The sister likes it,

(01:10:34):
but he does obviously, so she'slike, listen, I have to
tell you something, and as shestarts to tell him, he just sort
of grabs her and kisses her.So now they're making out. And also
in this scene, I noticed thatthere are just fairy lights everywhere on this

(01:10:55):
castle exterior. They are just Thiscastle has a lot. I loved it.
I loved it. Oh, Ithought i'd noticed it. So while
they're out there kissing, Simon andSophia break into Amber's room and at first
I thought she had just left allthe documents laying everywhere, and she didn't.
She likes stuck them in her briefcasething, but then left her briefcase

(01:11:15):
just sitting there, so and shedid lock the door, but they break
into it with a bobby pin becausethis castle has no security, as we've
noticed, so they know that he'sadopted you done. So what happens now?
Oh, next morning it is theday of the Christmas Ball, and

(01:11:40):
Richard goes and visits his father's graveand pledges to take the crown as his
father always wanted. So it isthis beautiful moment. Emily, Princess Emily
comes to Amber's room and gives herthis cheap pewter bracelet that just moves Amber
so deep. Again, there's alwayscheap jewelry, always sheep jewelry, and

(01:12:02):
it's always a missed opportunity for productplacement. I don't understand why these movies
just don't go, get Go,get somebody. I'm rewatching. Do you
remember that show? I think it'sfrom like the twenty tens. New Girl
has Zoe desh I love you girl. I've Rewatching. It doesn't hold up
as well as second Rewatch, butit's still like, got some fun.

(01:12:26):
I mean, I'm doing the wholething anyways, watching episode last night where
there's a good five minutes of theepisodes that that that's just an advertisement for
a Ford Fusion. It's just it'sthem. It's the four guys are on
their way to a party. They'rein this car and they have this funny
like back and forth about all thestuff that the car does. You know,
you're and of course it would havebeen like twenty ten or twenty eleven.

(01:12:50):
So yeah, you know, here'sthe bluetooth and here's the hands free
stuff, and you know, andit was but it was funny. It
was all scripted. It was partof the show. But clearly it was
an advertising for this car. Idon't understand. It's like you're missing out
on millions of dollars. And theydid like she clearly had a MacBook,

(01:13:12):
Like they didn't cover it up likethey do want to. I didn't notice
that. Yeah, now they dida couple other things. Netflix must have
something with Apple. Yeah, soI don't know why they couldn't have given
her some kind of a bracelet.Yeah, make some calls. Have your
sales team called somebody like, Yeah, I'm like, do you want to
put your bracelet and give her aCardier bracelet or something to Jared something I

(01:13:34):
don't know. Okay, So sothey're getting so the ball. Oh so
Princess Emily also you know, basicallygives her a glam squad. She just
gonna get her hair and makeup done. They've got her gown, all the
goodies, and so they cut tothe royals are all down there greeting everyone

(01:13:54):
at the ball, and the queensays something about how she remembers the king's
coronation at the Christmas Eve ball,And at that moment, I remembered at
the beginning when Amber was explaining toher editor about how there's a year between
when the previous king or queen diesand then they have a year until the

(01:14:18):
next one's crown. And so Ihave a question. And my question is
why does everyone die at Christmas inAldovia? May everyone crown at Christmas?
Maybe it is something about maybe it'slike a special sort of like chemical in

(01:14:39):
the air or something that's what makesAldovia like Wakanda. You know, Wakanda
has precious metals. Aldovia has amineral that makes you die at Christmas.
Something like that. I think thereis something going on at that festival,
don't And I think and I askedRichard didn't want to go out there,

(01:15:00):
don't drink the eggnog. He's like, he's like, these orphans are gonna
protect me, and I'm not goingon. Those orphans are the sons and
daughters of all the people who havedied at Christmas. At the coordination.
He's like, I'm going to disappearfor a year and learn martial arts.

(01:15:21):
I'm going to find the murder,the coordination, the Christmas coordination murder.
Something is happening in Aldovia, andI want answers. I want to know.
Well, I want to know whythey're killing off their regions at Christmas.

(01:15:43):
Oh my gosh. When the Queensaid that, I was like,
wait, let's wait a minute.Something is weird here. You guys really
be concerned. This is the storythat Amber needs to be going after,
right, there is an error nowto find this odd you're an investigative journalist,
no wonder everybody's turning down your pitches. You don't even notice. But

(01:16:06):
she sends them my snail mail.It's really out letters from magazines, you
know, sends the whole pitches,like to whom and make concern dude,
little letter The Coronation Killer is madefor the pages of readers digests and they're

(01:16:30):
like, Eh, this doesn't seemright. Oh shoot, all right,
well that's that's a Lifetime movie.Well but that storyline goes in the Lifetime
movie. Yeah I'm saying. AllI'm saying is something is wrong in Aldovia,
and nobody seems to care and andnot the reporter, least of all

(01:16:51):
the reporter, least of all thereporter. And I hope that Netflix does
a deep documentary about it, andI'm gonna watch every episode, but a
good a good, not a goodNetflix not a crime documentary about the killer
in Cordovia. I mean, excuseme, Aldovia, not Lordovia. Aldovians

(01:17:15):
hate it when clubs acrossover. Aldovian'shat it when you get that mixed up
with Cordovia. All right, okay, so now we get Now we get
one of our other favorite tropes,which is that dress moment at the top
of the stairs. You know theyall she appears. Amber appears at the
top of the stairs wearing her beautifuldress again totally unearned to me. Yeah,

(01:17:42):
and she's still wearing her stupid Converseall Stars, which she's worn too
like every event, which would befine. Again again, it's like this
actress didn't do all the things sheneeds to do to sell this cheesy stuff.
So the shoes could have worked ifthey were a thing. I think
Sophia made it a point to mentionthe shoes at one point, and it

(01:18:04):
was clear that maybe we were supposedto be because they had her dress like
a little a teenage boy the wholemovie. This is the other thing that
I don't enjoy about the youthful writersthese days is that now we're in this
era of we have to desexualize women. It's like something is wrong with a

(01:18:28):
woman being feminine and sexual in someway, and what it gives us is
a bunch of tomboys. And asa former tomboy, nothing wrong with tomboys.
But when I'm watching a romance movie, especially when it takes place at
Castle, I want beauty, andyou know, I want I want glamor,
and it just the payoff for themakeover. It wasn't there either.

(01:18:53):
Okay, dresser like a teenage boy, but then freaking glam her up.
I want to see Cidy Cropper comingdown those stairs, right, And it
wasn't like that at all. SoI the shoes could have been cute if
that was a moment that had beenwe had been earning it throughout the movie,
but we we just haven't, Iknow, I know. So the

(01:19:15):
ball has apparently like started without them. Okay, So Prince Richard, you
know, takes her into the ballroomand they dance and let's see. Oh
so they and then they just arelike, okay, let's crown him now.

(01:19:41):
Yeah, it was really quick.Did we talk about did we miss
the kiss? Did they have akiss? Yet? They get they kiss
outside the castle full of lights whenshe tried to tell him the night before.
That's right, and they had kids. So that was kind of the
big deal because that's the departure fromthe Palmark model, which was a kiss
before the end. I let itgo because it's Netflix, but it's worth

(01:20:04):
mentioning. Yeah. So yeah,so then they just go right into the
coronation. Apparently it's not like wewant We just watched a coronation, which
is a rare event in your inyour lifetime. And yeah, you know,
there was filled with pomp and circumstance. Kinsey was there hours days,

(01:20:25):
Yes, the preparation and I meanand miles, hundreds of miles of traveling
and touring and waving and visiting,and this was like, okay, we've
had a dance. It was likecrowning the homecoming king. But I appreciated
the simplicity of Aldovian tradition. Yes, that's true. Did Paul Revere really

(01:20:54):
say the British are coming, andhow was George Washington chosen to lead the
first American Army. Join us forthe Growing Patriot podcast, a place for
curious kids to ask the big questionsabout our nation's history and get kid friendly
answers from the country's top experts.Help your child learn about and cherish America's
exceptional history. Subscribe to Growing Patriotson Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your

(01:21:16):
podcasts today. So they're like,okay, well, Prince Richard is gonna
be king, so anyway, doyou take the oath? Okay? Cool?
Does anyone you know speak now orforever? Hold your piece? And
Lady Sophia is like, I disputethe claim. And then she's like,
I dispute the claim of this fraudulentChristmas prince. Like you sound crazy.

(01:21:42):
That's just a weird phrase to you. Yeah, calm down, lady,
Like why you got to say itlike that? At least see why they
broke up. She's just so dramatic. But again, that is an actress
selling what she's been in. Sheis selling her and cable lovy villain she
is. I'm buying it. I'mbuying what she's selling. But here's the

(01:22:06):
other thing. This is we'll getto it, but there were two last
minute disruptions in this movie that's likeuh uh oh speak now or forever hold
your piece. And I've never beento an event where like a typically you

(01:22:26):
would think of like a wedding wherethat happens. I've never been to an
event where somebody actually did stand upand say, oh, actually I do
have an objection? Have you no? If listeners, if you've ever been
to an event where someone took advantageof that invitation and actually registered an objection,

(01:22:48):
go ahead and send us an email. A very very it's a very
merry podcast right at gmail. Yes, a very merry podcast at gmail dot
com. I need to hear thisstory. I've never But also I just
wonder, you know, do youhave to wait for the invitation to interrupt
her because you interrupt sooner? Imean I think you, I think etiquette,

(01:23:12):
Why is you're supposed to wait?Oh you're already interrupting a major ceremony
like iman, Yeah, that's notgood etiquette. All right, Well whatever,
I hope we get some answers onthis because I really want to know
if anyone has ever Yeah, Idon't know. Well, so the ceremony
gets interrupted, and Sophia is gonnablow in off the whole She's gonna do

(01:23:38):
the job that the tabloid reporter wouldn'tdo. Right. So and then and
so the Prime Minister guy is like, what makes you think that he's adopted?
And she's like, because the tabloidreporter Amber over there, who's pretending
to be Martha, was like,she found these giants found and I don't

(01:24:00):
know, I adopted right on it. Here's a giant birth certificate. So
there and then they're like, waita minute, you're not Martha. She's
like, oh no, JK,I am totally Amber, tabloid reporter.
So Richard literally just runs away.Richard Carlton. We find out that the

(01:24:25):
family's last name they couldn't have comeup. They came up with Aldobia.
Why can't we go one? Carltonis like, Carlton is your is your
dopey Republican? I think it's Charltonwith an age, but still they said
it several times as Carlton. Eitherway, it should be like von Happenstein

(01:24:53):
to Collier, you know, knockinghold on. I have a picture sure
of his birth certificate right here.His adoption certificate. Okay, all right,
let's find out what it says.It is Prince Richard Bevin B E
V A N. Charlton with anage. But yes, it should be

(01:25:15):
way more interesting now, it shouldbe like yeah, yeah, anyways,
nippick. That's fine, all right. So Richard runs away, Simon just
like steps up and he's like,I will be king instead, and so
see it will be my queen.And the people in the crowd just like
cheer. You're like, oh,they are a bunch of disloyal fools.

(01:25:36):
Well if they just want a king, Disney the king, you know,
how do people start real particular aboutthat kind of stuff. But it's like
the whole time, the whole atmosphereof this coronation has been if we don't
have the coronation, like the countrywill descend in the anarchy. Like people
are like, what happens if wedon't what do we do if we don't

(01:25:57):
have the king? Who's like,oh, world war free? For sure.
It's true. Aldobia is really theonly thing holding us together. The
Aldoba is the key, the delicatekey to world stability. So the queen
goes back to the castle and Richardis, you know, kind of freaking

(01:26:17):
out because he didn't know he wasadopted and he just got embarrassed in front
of everybody. And it turns outthat Amber is not Martha, and he's
like, I'm going to fight Simonon this, and she's like, yeah,
that's what you should do. Butyou know, also he totally forgives
her and he loves his parents andwhatever. Yeah, yeah, I really
is that. Yeah, he's notgoing to struggle too deeply with that.

(01:26:40):
That is too dark. We've alreadygot the disabled sister, which, by
the way, Alice Kreig I lookedup and now she's sixty nine years old
now at the time of this makingof this film, she was closer to
sixty. But to have a thirteenyear old daughter, yeah, she calls
it a miericle birth, and oncelike she's having babies into her late fifties.

(01:27:03):
That's a good point. They reallyare. We should say you should
say that, Emily. So,yeah, they adopted Prince Richard because after
they got married, they found outthey couldn't have kids, so they secretly
adopted a baby to secure the throne. And then we're surprised with Emily.
But I did go to the ladydoctor recently, and I asked her about

(01:27:26):
menopause because I'm forty nine years old. I'm hitting fifty, and so I
was asking her about how all thatworks, because I really would like my
husband to get up aseectomy, buthe is waiting me out, and he's
waiting out my biology. And soI said, well, look, let's
just be honest here. I'm tooold to get pregnant at this point.

(01:27:49):
I've had two kids, the youngestis sixteen. Like, there's no way
this is happening. And she waslike, oh, you never heard of
a menopause baby. I'm like,uh no, She's like, oh,
women your age, they're like,oh, I can't get pregnant, and
they don't have periods for years,and then boom, fifty five years old,
they're pregnant. Boom, Princess Emilythere she is. I'm like,

(01:28:13):
oh my gosh, that sounds terrible. So it's clearly a late in life
baby. And she wasn't a miracle. But I did appreciate how they treated
adoption as a normal and loving choice. We don't talk a lot about it
in these movies. There's one moviethat I'm thinking of, the one with

(01:28:34):
Kristen what's her face? The Frozenfrom Frozen Christmas smart Bell, not Bell,
no anyways, Chennai not from Frozenbut other musicals. But that was
a Hallmark movie that had a littledarkness to it about this woman who gave

(01:28:57):
up a baby as a teenager,but later on she comes into contact with
this teenager and it's a beautiful storyabout adoption. It's actually a very heartfelt
story. I was surprised Hallmark madeit. I appreciated that they looked at
an adoption, that it wasn't ascontroversial as the script promised it would be
interesting. I like that. Ithink a lot of people there's still to

(01:29:21):
this day stigma around adoption, andI just always appreciate the people who make
the choice for adoption. It's ablessing for both sides. It is so,
which is obviously what Prince Richard islike, Okay, that's cool,
right, and he's secure. Whatdoes he care anyways? You know,

(01:29:42):
he plays with the orphans at theorphanage, the sons and daughters of murdered
mothers and fathers, and so youknow, at least I'm not one of
them, all right. So thenext morning, so we're on Christmas Day,
now is the day after and Amberis that, you know, the
Aldovian International Airport, and we havea little more product placement because they show

(01:30:04):
all of the United airplanes sitting outsidewayingto take her back to New York.
And she calls her dad again andit's like, well, I just ruined
my life because I don't have thestory. I don't have the man.
My career is over. And herdad is like, well, failure plants
the seed for future success, andagain you get the little like way and

(01:30:28):
then she's like, Dad, youjust like gave me the clue that unfolds
the whole secret. And she likejust pulls out that riddle thing from the
King's Journal. And I don't knowif she either like copied it down or
did she like steal the King's Journal. I don't know that she copied it
because I I wait, did shesteal the I don't know. So meanwhile,

(01:30:53):
back at the palace, Prince Richardand the Queen are asking for a
delay. They don't. They're like, can we just it's Christmas Day?
Can we not crown Simon like rightnow? And they're like, no,
we obviously only murder people on Christmasand there's a reason for that. The
coronation has to coincide with the birthof Christ right, and like it goes

(01:31:15):
all the way back to our originalking Herod. It's complicated, there's a
lot to it. We're hiring anAmerican tutor to come in and teach alb
So the Prime Minister is like,I'm really sorry, but we have a
quorum of prime of a counselors orwhatever, and once we have a quorum,

(01:31:35):
the coronation must go on. Theministers do not leave your house.
But yeah, the work quorum wasused quite a bit in the script.
Yeah, So Amber like rushes backto the palace and missus out. April
is like, how dare you showyour peasant face here again? And she's

(01:31:56):
like, listen, I can provethat Richard is the rightful king. Just
you've got to let me into thishouse. And so she's like fine.
So she goes into the house andshe rips that giant, massive acorn ornament
off the tree so big, twistthe top off of it and there's this
document inside when no one thought tolook inside that it's clearly a hall ornament.

(01:32:17):
No one even thought to lift itoff like it was a reget Why
else want it be that big?Thank you? Nobody makes an ornament that
big for no reason, duh.And the document that she pulls out is
so official looking, and it makesit it's even funnier when you think about
it, next to how unofficial lookingthe like birth certificate and the adoption certificate,

(01:32:39):
which we're obviously like made on aprinter, you know, like a
dot matrix printer from the eighties.It's like that it's the same printer that
what's her face Danica mckeller used toprint out the princess paper newspaper. Yeah,
yes, exactly. So she's like, there, I have the document

(01:33:00):
and we don't know what it isyet. So she's like running over to
wherever this coronation is taking place,where the quorum has just been reached.
So they're like going back and forth. So as this is going on,
they're like in the middle of thisceremony about to crown Simon, and they're
like, you know, Simon's takingthe oath, and Princess Emily like says

(01:33:25):
to her brother, She's like,Richard, you're my king. And I
was just like okay, okay,thank you, all right. Then she
goes and I'm right, and like, first of all, like, okay,
the brother part wasn't really in question, like I know he's adopted,
but like everyone already thought he wasyour brother, like okay, but like

(01:33:47):
you're my king. Okay, likethat was weird, but all right,
yeah so that okay, So thatreminded me. I was dying laughing the
other day thinking about and this remindedme of this. When Joe Biden was
elected president, he tweeted like it'sa new morning in America or something,
and then this guy responded, JoeBiden is not my president. And this

(01:34:12):
third dude goes, why you loveTrump so much? And the guy replied,
I am from India. I justthink about that tweet and it just
makes me laugh so hard. Thisguy was not making a political statement at
all. He's just like, no, I live somewhere else, like stupid

(01:34:33):
like stupidity of Twitter. He wasjust like Andison Dune and I was like,
think about him, and he makesme happy. No, I live
in India. I'm just stating afact, sir. You're not my president.
But but but Richard is Emily's king, so good for you and adopted

(01:34:55):
even though he is adopted. ThanksEmily for that. Yeah, and it's
like, okay, thank you,thank you, Emily. So they're about
to be like you are the kingand stick the crown on Simon's head,
and Amber rushes in in the lastminute and is like, I have the
papers, And it turns out thatthe thing that was inside of the acorn

(01:35:17):
was a document that King Richard theFirst, the late king, this decree
changing the rules of succession so thatan adopted child could inherit the throne.
Okay, And this was a surpriseto me because I was one hundred percent

(01:35:38):
for certain that that was going todecree that a girl child could take the
throne. And ironically, that's whatwould have happened in Hallmark. That's how
it would have been. The princesswould have been the successor. It's time
for a new day on the throne. So I actually was like happily empressed

(01:36:00):
that they they didn't choose to dolike a hashtag me too moment with that,
and they just went for the Hey, we're gonna let the adopted guy,
which I think is absolutely fair,absolutely a good idea because no matter
what, that is your child.So yeah, so I like to think

(01:36:21):
that it did both. I liketo think he just fixed the whole succession
mass. And it's like, okay, all of your kids adopted kids,
girl kids, O session is justkids now? Yeah, no disabled kids
though, Well, go to boggingkids. And then so immediately Sophia's like,

(01:36:44):
by the way, I'm divorcing Simon. If he's not going to be
king, I am out of herenaturally. So so then they're like,
okay, we're gonna crown We're goingto crown Richard again. We're going to
go back to plan A start crowninghim again. So they get back to
doing that, and as they're crowninghim, Amber leaves, she's got to
get her fly back to New York. Yeah, they are right. So

(01:37:09):
Aldovia goes about its business, theyhave a king, they're all set,
and her editor fires her because shedid not file the adoption story. She
got scooped. They sent her assall the way to Aldovia. They paid
for two weeks of whatever she wasdoing over there, and she didn't even

(01:37:31):
get was probably the biggest entertainment storyin the world and probably also the biggest
political story in the world. Andshe came back with nothing. Yeah,
she deserved to be fired yeah,and says she files like a fluff piece
about how King Richard is a niceguy. And so she's like, you're
firing me because like I wrote anice like a good story. It's well

(01:37:56):
written or whatever her argument is,and the editor's like, yep, but
it's not the story. So she'slike, well, I quit, and
the editor's like, okay, goodbyebye. I don't. So she decides
that she's gonna become a professional bloggerand write a blog about Richard. But
I mean, if she's not gonnapublish anything, okay, she's just gonna

(01:38:19):
publish the nice stuff. She's goingto be a royal influencer. I guess,
yeah, which I don't. Andthen like later her friends say something
about how she's like gotten twenty thousandhits in two days or something like oh
no, that is not viral.That is like they were like, yeah,
they were. That part cracked meup, even in twenty seventeen.

(01:38:42):
They were like, oh, yourblog's doing great. Your story which for
day one or two of a newblog, Yeah, I guess that's great,
but that's not a viral thing.And then there's not a thing of
like no you've got twenty thousand hitsin two days, you're definitely going viral.
You go viral right away, oryou're not going viral. You know

(01:39:04):
everybody will see it. Or alsosomething that somebody picks up five years from
an now. I'm like, yeah, and in her case, in her
case, those first couple of dayslike those are like her only couple days
to make a difference, because noone's ever gonna know who she is.
Again, Like it's not like she'sgoing to gain attention, you know,

(01:39:26):
like yeah her, Yeah, anyway, Yeah, I views that's nothing.
That is nothing. You can watchsomebody eating a hot dog on TikTok was
eighth. So it's it's no wonderthat new yeer'sy finds her with her besties
waiting tables at her dad's diner,huh, at Rudy's and they want her

(01:39:49):
to like, you know, goout and hang out with this. You
know, they found some cute dudefor her to hang out with and kiss
at midnight or whatever, and she'slike she doesn't want to. No,
again, I'm young, and Ijust I don't want to go out and
have fun and I really don't wanta relationship because yeah, whatever. But

(01:40:10):
then and then suddenly it's midnight andthe street is completely empty and Prince Richard
is there. And they've known eachother, you know, for three weeks,
most of which she was lying tohim. So what does he do
but the only sensible thing and proposewith the ugliest ring I've ever seen in

(01:40:31):
my life. It was very good. So she does the only sensible thing
and says, yes, but Ilive in the street, and they kiss
in the street and I but Iliked that they sort of addressed it.
We never see this in Hallmark rightwhere they address the timeline, which she
did. There was one comment whereshe was like, we hardly know each
other and and he said, butI feel like I've known you forever or

(01:40:54):
whatever. I mean. Obviously itwas like we're letting a lot go here.
But again another reason why the actchoice of actress more than the man.
All of the Hallmark formula is apowerful female centric formula, and all
the power lies with the with thewoman, and so she has the ability
to sell the cheesy, ridiculous timelineof the romance. Again, just didn't

(01:41:18):
see that from her. You know, there should be a moment where it's
like, yeah, I am.I am falling. You know what's really
good at that is Joe Wagner fromfrom Hallmark is one of our favorites.
She does that great. That's sortof like, I know this is unreasonable,
but I can't help but I'm fallingin love and I think this is
crazy, but let's just go forit. That and that is what I
take away from this movie. Irealized, like what we love, we

(01:41:44):
say what we love about Hallmark allthe time, but I just I think
it really set in that the reasonwhy this is so popular, such a
popular formula, and the reason whythe Netflix crowd flipped out over this movie
because they hadn't seen the Hallmark brandbefore, is that people are starving for
just pure enjoyment. They don't needa lot of bells and whistles, they

(01:42:10):
don't need the plot to make perfectsense. A few good things is all
you need. One of the thingsyou need is a female at a character
who can sell all of those cheesy, cheesy ideas and who can sell the
innocence. Ben lamb in it towin it all the way he was giving

(01:42:30):
everything, even the sister. Everybodyelse in this movie knew what movie they
were in. I came away wonderingif Rose MacIvor was maybe ill during this
production or had other things going on. She was just so flat and killed
for me, what I think wasa really good Christmas movie. Yeah,

(01:42:51):
that's my sect. I mean,I enjoyed it. I like, you
know, this movie will always havekind of a special place in my heart
because it was kind of introducing thisgenre to a wider audience. So the
mainstreaming of the mainstreaming of Hallmark ifyou will, yes, yeah, so

(01:43:14):
I will. I know that you'renot going to watch the other ones.
But a little spoiler about the secondone that cracks me up is in the
second one, Simon is super intocryptocurrency, and that racks me up because
it's so there's something so on brandabout it that's amazing. Well, this

(01:43:40):
movie was trope heavy, did alot. I did a lot with the
tropes, and you know, morethan Hallmark is doing these days. So
there's a Christmas deadline of some sorts, right, there's a coronation that they're
all barreling towards precocious child. Yeah, she's a little bit older, but
I think we can check that box. Yeah, I think we can decorating

(01:44:03):
the tree with those giant ornaments thatthe king made by hand, each one
one was she was holding it.It was like, this is felt,
this is knit, the king knit. Maybe he did, Probably a misunderstanding
that could be cleared up easily witha yeah, not saying no, I

(01:44:24):
wasn't the tutor easily found evidence?Right, someone walks into your room and
oh, the computer with all theincriminating evidence is wide open. The glam
moment right, the makeover moment yep, and oh snowball fight heck yeah,

(01:44:46):
heck yes, black bff we gota black one and a gay one.
We only saw them through Skype,which must be the worst way to act
or record scenes. But hey,yeah, well them, we did see
them briefly. But yeah at theend, yeah they so they filled that.

(01:45:09):
Yeah, am I missed anything?Baking scene? I don't think so.
I don't think so. That's itall right? Well I recommend this
movie. I despite my issues withthe lead actress. Again, I would
like to reiterate, I think youmight actually enjoy it. She is a
fine actress. She really is.Yeah, it just didn't This movie again

(01:45:30):
made me wonder if there she wasill or something. I I'm a new
Ben Lamb fan. Bring him onover a great American channel, y'all,
bring him over into the Prince universe. Love him. What do we think
of this name Aldovia? It's liketo me that it's a classic, like

(01:45:50):
it's they always end in like insomething like Ovia. You know, we
need to do we need to goback, like we need to gather all
the different king them names, andthen we need to have some kind of
contests to like name the next ChristmasLand kingdom. Yeah, something like that.
We all right, I've got toget going. What am I missing

(01:46:11):
here? Amelia? Do I needto tell anybody anything? Again? I
definitely recommend the film and kudos toeverybody who did it. Give everybody our
contact info, all that good stuff. So email us, you know,
if you've ever stopped a wedding obviously, yes, please I need to know.
Also find us on Instagram at avery Merry podcast, Facebook, a

(01:46:35):
very Merry podcast, Twitter, avery merry pod. So hit us up,
let us know what's up, whatmovies you're looking forward to this Christmas
and just interact with us, Sayhi, yeah, Amelia's got a few
classics in the lineup coming up.And then We're going to move into original
Christmas season in November, so you'regonna want to stay tuned for this season.

(01:46:58):
Check us out online in other spots, but really, if you just
go to our social media you'll seeall the stuff we're doing. Thanks to
everybody for tuning in. Thank youAmelia for making the time to sit down
and talk about this amazing movie.And Amelia, until we meet again.
I wish you days filled with heartfelt cliches and platitudes from your favorite dining

(01:47:30):
diner owner dead. Thank you.I wish you multiple snowball fight feelings.
Oh Mer, Christmas, Amelia,Me Christmas, Kia. This has been

(01:47:54):
a presentation of the FCB podcast Network, where Real Talk lives Visitors online at
fcbpodcasts dot com.

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Ep. 34 - Funny, Smart and Surprisingly Funky

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Ep. 34 - Funny, Smart and Surprisingly Funky