My Day Of Play 3 Crazy Unedited Talks Esther Zuckerman Jessie Andrews And April Belasco

Welcome back to the studio.  This is My Day of Play, where you’re taken into the real events and actions of how it happens long before the process of editing or cleaning up.  The original purpose of these episodes was to give my broadcasting students something to edit, to practice with and to call their own.  Then I realized that you are just as important.  Share the reality of how it really went.  We begin things with Esther Zuckerman who draws readers and movie fans in with her book Falling In Love At The Movies; Rom Coms from the Screwball Era to TodayOur second conversation takes us even deeper into the Hollywood experience with actress Jessie Andrews who was part of the thriller Love Bomb.Then we’ll wrap things up with April Belasco who was raised by a serial killer.  This is My Day of Play.  Completely unedited in the way of meeting the wizard behind the curtain.  

Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/arroe-collins-view-from-the-writing-instrument--1023245/support.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, welcome back to the studio. This is my day

(00:02):
of play, where you're taking into the really vincent actions
of how it really goes down before the process of
editing and or cleaning up. Now, the original idea of
these episodes was to give my broadcasting students something to edit,
to practice with, and to call their own. And then
I realized, wait a second, you're just as important as
they are. We begin things with Esther Zuckerman, who draws

(00:24):
readers and movie fans in with their book Falling in
Love at the Movies rom coms from the Screwball era
to today. Our second conversation takes us even deeper into
the Hollywood experience with actress Jesse Andrews, who was part
of the thriller love Bomb. Put that monkey up on
Hulu or Netflix. Then we're gonna wrap things up with
April Belasco, who was raised by a serial killer. This

(00:50):
is my day of play, completely unedited in the way
of meeting the wizard behind.

Speaker 2 (00:54):
The curtain recording in progress.

Speaker 1 (00:56):
And Arrows a great guy, And I'm not just saying
that because.

Speaker 3 (00:58):
He could hear me.

Speaker 1 (01:02):
There you go, How you guys doing all right?

Speaker 3 (01:04):
Done good?

Speaker 1 (01:05):
How are you absolutely fantastic kind of cold down here
though today in the Carolina's whoo well, it's cold here too.

Speaker 3 (01:10):
It's cold here too, amazing. All right, Esther is here.
You'll have till forty my friend, go right ahead, Esther.

Speaker 1 (01:17):
This book is coming out at such a great time.
And the reason why I say that right here in
the very beginning is because I've already experienced the new
Timothy Challoway movie, the one about Bob Dylan, and they
feature a love story in there from a black and
white movie, and I just know that people are going
to flock to this book because there's something about those
old movies that really do enlighten our hearts.

Speaker 4 (01:38):
Yes, yes, I have seen that movie too, though, though
I wouldn't call now Voyager, which is featured in a
complete unknowahed, is quite a very sad movie.

Speaker 1 (01:47):
Yeah, but you know you're laughing and having a good time.
I mean, I just great love story that that does
make me kind of chuckle, because so many times those
love stories kind of embarrassed me as well as put
me in a position of oh my god, that's me.

Speaker 5 (02:00):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (02:00):
I think that's one of the reasons we connect with
them so much, is because there is this relatable quality
to them.

Speaker 1 (02:08):
Isn't it kind of weird how twenty twenty four is
going to go down in history as the return of
the rom com.

Speaker 5 (02:14):
It is?

Speaker 4 (02:15):
I mean, I think that, you know, I think that
it's an interesting time in the history of them. I
think a lot of people say that romcoms are struggling
a little bit right now, but there have been some
great successes, like anyone but you and and even and
on streaming as well.

Speaker 1 (02:34):
I'm glad that you brought up that it's kind of
struggling right now, and I wonder if it's because that
we the viewers have figured out the formula, because we're
coming out of the theater going yeah, it played exactly
the way I thought it was going to play, and
they need to kind of reinvent their style.

Speaker 5 (02:48):
I think it's not.

Speaker 4 (02:49):
To a certain degree, but I think the thing that
I learned writing this book is that the formulas are
sort of meant to be broken, and throughout history, the
best rom coms have broken that formula.

Speaker 5 (03:02):
And have played with that.

Speaker 4 (03:04):
I do think, you know, the struggling, actually, I think
gets down more to a business aspect in Hollywood, which
has to do with you know, the disappearance of sort
of mid budget movies with movie stars that are not
based on big, you know, franchises.

Speaker 1 (03:26):
So now let me ask you this question. Do you
think that the rom com has taken a hit these
days only because of binge watching? Because in reality, why
can't a good ten part binge watch be considered a
rom com?

Speaker 5 (03:37):
I think there can be.

Speaker 4 (03:38):
I don't think binge watching is actually sort of the
reason that they have taken a hit. You know, rom
coms have been somewhere in many ways thrived on streaming.
There have been a number of really great rom coms
that have been released sort of only on Netflix. I
think it has more you know, movies like Set It Up,
which I really love, you know, sort of in the
team sphere of the To All the Boys that I

(03:58):
loved before even this year, or something like The Idea
of You with Anne Hathaway. So streaming actually has become
really more of a home for rom coms, and I
don't think binge watching sort of is the reason that
they have taken a hit. I actually think it has
to do more with the fact, as I said before,
the fact that people go to the movies more now,

(04:22):
more thinking that they're going to get superheroes or spectacle
and they're not as interested in sort of you know,
leaving their houses for the more human stories.

Speaker 1 (04:32):
And yet Sandra Bullock, she's not considered a hero. Oh
my god, I see her on the screen. She's my hero.

Speaker 5 (04:37):
Come on, I know, I fully agree.

Speaker 4 (04:41):
You know, I think that it's a failure a little
bit of imagination.

Speaker 1 (04:46):
Yeah. Now, one of the things that I got to
tell you, I was went into a shock and awe
moment when all the way back to the nineteen thirty
Wow shocked by that because I guess I never thought
of them as that.

Speaker 4 (04:58):
Yeah, I mean, the screw Ball comedies are extremely are
romantic comedies. You know, this book is done with Turner
classic movies. So there was you know, both a want
on my part and sort of a mandate that it
had to feature a lot of classic movies. And yeah,

(05:20):
I mean, romantic comedies have essentially been around since them
and you know, Shakespeare wrote rom.

Speaker 5 (05:25):
Coms, and.

Speaker 4 (05:29):
It's just not you know, I think the colloquial term
that people use rom com the sort of you know
what people think of it. You know, Meg Grian, Tom
Hanks is really indebted to what came before you.

Speaker 1 (05:44):
Bring up Ted the Turner classic movies. You know, there
used to be a time where we didn't have Ted
Turner saving these movies. I mean, can can you imagine
where we would be today if that man would not
have made that investment in our lives?

Speaker 4 (05:57):
Yeah, I mean it's really I mean investment is you know,
in the history of cinema is really important. I think,
you know, in our classic movies is an incredible resource
and incredible Really it's a really important thing. I think
other places too, are doing great work in it, like Criterion.
I think this is our you know, cinema is our history,

(06:17):
especially our American history and world history truly in terms
of international film, and I think, you know, we have
to we have to preserve and we have to save it.

Speaker 1 (06:29):
You brought up Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. I gotta,
I gotta be honest with you. This is my weirdness.
I did not like the ending. I did not want
them to meet, and I will argue that for the
rest of my life. I was so in love with
that story until they met. I just love the mystery
of them not knowing in which one.

Speaker 5 (06:46):
In Sleepless in.

Speaker 4 (06:47):
Civiliz you've got male, they're multiples where they don't know
it's each other.

Speaker 5 (06:55):
Yeah, I know, you know, I.

Speaker 4 (06:57):
Think that Sleeps in Seattle is a real fascinating, fascinating
movie that really shouldn't work on paper.

Speaker 5 (07:05):
I I like that they.

Speaker 4 (07:07):
Meet, but I like that you don't really know what
happened to them. The fact that they do meet and
there's this happy ending and there's this sort of sign
that maybe they'll fall in love is nice, but you
you truly don't know because they haven't met and they
don't know each other.

Speaker 1 (07:22):
Don't you love the idea that rom coms aren't necessarily
a Hallmark movie or something that's going to be on
Oprah Winfrey's channel. I mean, it's almost like on the
edge of those love stories.

Speaker 4 (07:32):
Yeah, I mean, I think the best ones are really
you know, are are are really deep and are really
sort of I have have a lot to say about
about how humans interact. I do think, you know, people,
one of the reasons that the genre gets a bad

(07:55):
rap sometimes is that people think that they're just sort
of churned out, that they're just you know, that they're
totally formulaic.

Speaker 5 (08:01):
But that's not really what it is about.

Speaker 1 (08:03):
So what is it about rom coms where the nerdy
guy really you know, ends up being the most handsome
on the screen.

Speaker 4 (08:11):
You know, I think that's uh, you know in in
intelligence is attractive. So I think that's one of the
reasons that you see that trope over and over again,
from everything like Born Yesterday, uh, which is a classic, to.

Speaker 5 (08:30):
You know today.

Speaker 4 (08:32):
You know, you look at today a movie like hit Man,
which which is another is another sort of great realm
come that came out this year. I do think that's
that's that's one of the reasons that that it always works.

Speaker 1 (08:45):
Don't you think it was also about the fashion and
the style in every one of these movies. It's almost like, yeah,
that's the way I want to dress up or dress
down totally.

Speaker 4 (08:54):
I mean, it's really it's really an aesthetic. But obviously
that also has changed over time. You know, you look
at everything from Roman Holiday and Audrey Hepburn's uh sorry
not sorry, not Roman Holiday because she wasn't wearing Javant
at that point, she was wearing Edith had Sabrina and

(09:15):
her gowns, you know, to Annie Hall and Diane Keaton's
incredible style. I think that's a it's a really huge
part of it.

Speaker 1 (09:23):
Oh my god, Diane Keaton period that right there. That's
that's if I see your name on on the on
the poster, it's an automatic win. And it's one of
those things he's going, Okay, what is it about her?
I think it's because it is about her.

Speaker 5 (09:35):
Yeah, yeah, I mean think it's that.

Speaker 4 (09:38):
One of the reasons that one of the reasons why
rom comes work so many times is the sort of
power of the stars and the power of these people
who are in them. You know, people like Diane Keane,
whether it be all the way back at Annie Hall
or in something like Something's Got to Give later.

Speaker 5 (09:57):
In her life.

Speaker 4 (09:58):
You know, I think we are attracted to them because,
you know, it's not like these actors are doing sort
of they're not they're not doing They're they're really talented actors,
but they're not you know, putting on a ton of makeup,
doing really transformative roles. They're just sort of like exuding
their natural charisma, and that's one of the reasons we're
drawn to them.

Speaker 1 (10:16):
I think one of the greatest things that I love
about modern day rom coms is the fact that there
is no age limit. In other words, I will go
see a Jane Fonda movie about older women falling in
love with with Tom Brady. That to me is just
the greatest thing on the planet.

Speaker 5 (10:30):
Yeah, I do, I did. I did love Ady for Brady.

Speaker 4 (10:34):
Though I'm not sure that one totally counts as a
rom com, it's not really. Yeah, I mean I think
there are I think there are movies that, you know,
that get sort of lumped into rom coms because they
have a similar tone. But that's the movie that is
entire not really about falling in love. I mean, yes,

(10:56):
Tom Brady is the reason they all go to the
football game, but it's action. It's a movie about themselves,
these women's relationships and getting older and you know, one
of them struggling with cancer. Like that's really sort of
the meat of it rather than you know, the love story.
And I do think a rom com has to, you know,
be centered around a love story.

Speaker 1 (11:16):
Now there's a psychological pool, isn't there on our heart
strings when it comes to these movies.

Speaker 4 (11:21):
Yeah, for sure, you know, I do think that's you know,
they they sort of they really do hit a pleasure
center in our brains.

Speaker 1 (11:29):
Yeah, And and and you know it's like when when
you sitting there flipping flipping the channels, you're trying to
figure out what's on the streaming networks. It's like it's
such an automatic just to go to something that's been
labeled a rom com.

Speaker 5 (11:39):
Yeah, I I do.

Speaker 4 (11:41):
I think, you know, I think one of the reasons
that people love them and are drawn to them is
there's this element of comfort. But I also think that,
you know, some of the best rom comms don't aren't
you know, aren't only happy, and aren't only you know,
aren't only meant to sort of satisfy? Think some of
them have a lot of sort of meat and depth

(12:03):
to them.

Speaker 1 (12:04):
Because I'm at so many movie premieres, one of my
favorite things to do is to look out over the
crowd and watch the guys go through one of their
ugly cries Oh my god. That to me is part
of the fun and the humor.

Speaker 4 (12:16):
Yeah, I agree, you know, when when it don't expect
I think that's a really beautiful thing.

Speaker 1 (12:25):
What is what is the secret sauce when it comes
to creating a great rom com? I mean, is it
is it? Is it a sweetheart type of vibration? I mean,
what is it that we have to see or feel?

Speaker 4 (12:34):
I mean, I think a lot of it actually comes
down to the writing. I think that the best the
best rom coms are really really well written, and they
have this sort of sparkling dialogue. They have a script
that draws us in and the characters are have.

Speaker 5 (12:53):
The characters are able to.

Speaker 4 (12:55):
Talk to one another in a way that sort of
bands around a tats like it's the it's the I
mean the reason.

Speaker 5 (13:03):
You know, when you go.

Speaker 4 (13:04):
Back to the Screwballs of the thirties, there is a
lot of you know, there's His Girl Friday sort of
format where it's this really really vibrant sort of back
and forth between these characters between Carry Grant and Russell
and Russell and then you sort of zoom ahead to

(13:27):
when Harry met Sally. Like the reason when Harry met
Sally works is because of mora around script, because it's
really really well written.

Speaker 1 (13:33):
Well, man, you bring up Carry Grant right away. I'm
thinking our Carry Grant right now. It has to be
Oh my god, Hugh Grant, what do you think? Yeah,
I mean, I think, I mean, he's got that sex
appeal about him. Nothing, he says, you know, we'll go empty.
You know, it's like he's like, yeah, that's that guy.

Speaker 4 (13:51):
Yeah, I mean, for sure, I think, you know, I think,
but I do think Hugh Grant sort of even so,
he was really that in the in the nineties and
two thousands, I think now if you look at his
more recent movies, he's very much into sort of subverting
them that image, playing sort of a little bit guys

(14:12):
who are a little bit scary, guys who.

Speaker 5 (14:13):
Are a little bit who use it that their advantage.

Speaker 4 (14:15):
There's a horror movie out right now called Heretic where
Hugh Grant is the lead and is very charming but
in a very scary way.

Speaker 1 (14:26):
Well, let me ask you this question, then, when it
comes to these rom coms, is it the starting ground,
the jumping point where people can, you know, get out
there be seen. I mean, because look at Seth Rogan's career.

Speaker 4 (14:35):
Come on now, Yeah, I mean I think, you know,
I think it very much used to be.

Speaker 5 (14:41):
I think it's changed a little bit over time.

Speaker 4 (14:43):
I think now you're not seeing a lot of the
younger stars breaking out in rom coms, and I think
that's just because.

Speaker 5 (14:50):
There's not an opportunity as much for them.

Speaker 4 (14:53):
But I do think you look at someone like Glenn Tallow,
who started in the Netflix movie set it up and
has gone on, you know, to be on top gun
and you know, doing and this area to anyone.

Speaker 5 (15:04):
But you I do think it's maybe changing a little
bit back to that.

Speaker 1 (15:09):
You know, I've been fascinated by Netflix and Hulu for
showing these movies. But I often wonder though, if it's
almost like Karen and Richard Carpenter, where people never admitted
they love the Carpenters, but they would listen to it secretly.
And sometimes I think these rom com movies are watched
secretly by one persons sitting in the room, going I
better take this one in so I have something to
talk about.

Speaker 4 (15:27):
Yeah, I mean, I do think I I obviously think
there's nothing to be ashamed of watching rom coms, whether
you're a man or a woman. Uh. There, there's really
they because they are because they do have such a
long story and history that I that I've written about
in this book.

Speaker 5 (15:46):
You know, I think for I.

Speaker 4 (15:47):
Think it's it's an interesting sort of path of the
you know, the two thousands rom coms sort of got
this this this reputae where they were seen as sort
of cheesy, But I don't think anyone was ashamed of
going to see It Happened One Night with Clark Gable
and Claudet Colbert.

Speaker 5 (16:09):
You know, way back when, I.

Speaker 1 (16:13):
Love the way that independent movie houses are bringing those
movies back. They're allowing us to see it on their
big screens, and I think that this book really fits
right into that genre. Now as we jump into this, yeah, I.

Speaker 5 (16:23):
Mean, I think again sort of.

Speaker 4 (16:26):
You know you talk about like TCM and other places
preserving cinema history. Repertory theaters around the country are some
sources if you can go see a If you can
go to a repertory screening of something and see it
on a big screen, see it. Maybe it's even projected
in thirty five millimeters or something like that. It's a

(16:47):
really important it's a really important resource speaking and it's
great fun speaking.

Speaker 1 (16:51):
Of importance here, how about you know the way that
romcom movies are are working with the LGBTQ group, because
I mean to me that not only do they serve
as a great love story, but it's an educational love story.
It allows all people to step into that storyline, live
it and understand.

Speaker 4 (17:08):
Yeah, I mean, they've been really great rom coms dealing
with queer themes for for years and years, going back
to something like Jeffrey, which is a movie that you
know is both is is very much a standard rom com,
but is also set against the backdrop at the Adiens crisis,
and then you know, flash short ahead, you have something
like to today you have something like you know, Fire Island,

(17:30):
your bros. Or you know, next year there's a there's
a remake coming out of The Wedding Banquet, which is
one of my favorite rom coms that also you know,
has gay characters. It's the original was directed by Ann Lee,
the wonderful uh, the wonderful director who also made Crouching
Tiger hit something like Crouching Tiger hit.

Speaker 5 (17:52):
Him Dagon and he made this rom com, The Wedding Banquet, And.

Speaker 4 (17:54):
Now it's getting a remake starring Lily Gladstone and Bolamier
among others.

Speaker 5 (18:01):
So I'm very very excited for that.

Speaker 1 (18:03):
So I was taken back when I learned that Missus
Robinson is considered a rom com. It's like, what, I
gotta go see that movie again.

Speaker 4 (18:12):
Oh you mean The Graduate, Yeah, the Graduate? Yeah, yeah, yeah,
the song is Missus Robinson.

Speaker 5 (18:17):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (18:17):
I think a lot of people consider you know, the
seventies were an interesting time because I think the screwball
era late sixties, I mean it became out of late sixties,
but the late sixties seventies were in interesting time because
I think, you know, a lot of people, a lot
of people thought of, you know, the screwball era had

(18:37):
sort of faded away, and a lot of you know,
these are this is the era of sort of easy
rider raging bulls. But so the rom coms are sort
of adapting to that and getting weirder and stranger and
something like The Graduate or you know, Mike Nichols made
a lot of great realm coms, uh, you know, The
Graduate being one of them, later on Working World being

(18:59):
another they and but in the seventies they were sort
of adapting to the time, so getting getting sort of
a little bit more off eat something like The Graduate
or something like Harold and Maud. All rom coms, but
definitely not what you know, what many people think of
as So.

Speaker 1 (19:16):
What's your gut feeling on the sequels, because I really
thought that My Big Fat Wedding should have just been
one movie and not a continuation.

Speaker 4 (19:24):
Yeah, I think that it's really hard to make a
wrong pequal I think you know, many of them do
not have sequels. It's hard to unless you're doing something
that's really sort of interrogating sort of what happens after
your happy ending or you're not so happy ending. It's

(19:46):
it's really hard to do the next one. I think
there are very few movies that you know, you could
count as rom coms that have great sequels, the main
one being you know, Before the Before movies, but for Sunrise,
Before Sunset, and Before Midnight, which, by the end, the
last one doesn't even really feel like a rom com

(20:07):
that the first two were, because it's really about how
difficult marriage is.

Speaker 5 (20:11):
Man.

Speaker 1 (20:11):
I just love where your heart is on this thing,
and just the fact that you're sharing the story of
where we are now in today's history, because we have
to know the pages and the journeys of those before
this so that we can, you know, just appreciate movies
even more, and you took that step.

Speaker 5 (20:26):
Thank you so much. I really appreciate that.

Speaker 1 (20:27):
Where can people go to find out more about you
and everything that you bring to the movies.

Speaker 4 (20:32):
You can find me, you know, on social media at
at easy my Initials Rights, and you can find the
book wherever you buy your books.

Speaker 1 (20:45):
Excellent. Well, please come back to the show anytime in
the future. The door is always going to be open
for you.

Speaker 5 (20:50):
Thank you so much.

Speaker 1 (20:51):
Will you'd be brilliant today? Okay, thank you, thank you,
Please don't move. Coming up next, actress Jesse Andrews. Hey,
I want to thank you for coming back to my
day of play. Let's get into that talk with actress
Jesse Andrews.

Speaker 6 (21:06):
Intricating his questions and he just a hell of a guy.

Speaker 1 (21:08):
Nah, that's not me.

Speaker 6 (21:12):
We're talking about the cost of lattes.

Speaker 5 (21:16):
You, rad one.

Speaker 6 (21:17):
No, I haven't luck at you. You'd be addicted if
you did.

Speaker 4 (21:22):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (21:22):
I like a good addiction, though, though, you know case,
if there's something great out there, I've got to experience it.
I mean, you know, like these apps. I mean I'm
all over anybody who's got an app that really could
enhance something or or just kind of give you that
little bit of a ooh man that kind of scares me.

Speaker 6 (21:37):
All right, Like Uber.

Speaker 1 (21:38):
Yeah, oh my god, I'm part of that generation that
when when Uber first was introduced, I was in New
York City and they were telling us not to get
in the cars, the black cars, take the taxi And
today it's just the normal thing.

Speaker 6 (21:54):
Yeah, it takes a second something like that to get
Easter and then it becomes your whole world.

Speaker 1 (22:00):
Wow, to be a part of love Bomb. What drew
you into this role? Because I mean, this is one
of those things that it kind of you can't help
but feel like, God, this this could actually happen.

Speaker 6 (22:11):
Yeah exactly. I feel like I'm really drawn to roles
that are that are realistic, and I love being able
to play a character that you could almost see yourself
meeting or interacting with. And when I read this script,
I had to read it again to really understand it.
But I essentially I play three different people within it.
So the character development and the plot twist and everything

(22:36):
was really really interesting to me. And I was just
drawn to the to the script.

Speaker 1 (22:40):
That's one of the things that a lot of viewers
of movies and fans of television, they don't understand what
that means. Where we got the script. It's like, Okay,
I have a problem reading a book. How do you
sit down and read a script?

Speaker 6 (22:52):
Right right? I this is this sounds terrible, but I've
just read my first like book. I sometimes I listen
to audiobooks. I just read my first book book in ages.
It was a Joan Didion book played as a las
and I, for some reason I saw it and I
was like, I need to read this. I was so
drawn to I don't know why. And then I read

(23:12):
it and it was so hard for me to pay
attention for the most part, but I got through it
in a day, which I was also surprised to myself
being able to push through a book in a day,
and my head kind of hurt from focusing on the words.
But there's just something that we have now built inside
of us where we're so add and we want we
want stimulation. And I think that's you know, a lot

(23:33):
of what love Palm is about too. It's like you
want that interesting, like kink and quirk and yeah, and
that's us as humans.

Speaker 3 (23:43):
Well.

Speaker 1 (23:44):
It's a congress starter because if you're sitting with somebody
in the theater watching this or in a living room,
it's one of those things where you just sit there
and you go, so, uh, what would you do?

Speaker 6 (23:53):
Right?

Speaker 1 (23:54):
And I love I love it when when when the
authors of these stories can make that connection to somebody
that they cannot see, but they know they're going to
show up for the party.

Speaker 6 (24:04):
Right, right, writers, they're incredible, Like someone who can write
like this where something comes full circle and there's a
plot twist and everything is interconnected from the beginning. I
think it's such an incredible you know ability to be
able to write something like that.

Speaker 1 (24:20):
That first day on the set, How did that play
out for you guys, because I mean that's like, you know,
going to the first day of school. It's like, okay,
who's here? All right? Never worked with you before? What's happening?

Speaker 6 (24:30):
Yeah, it was really fun. We had a really small
cast and crew. I mainly was in one sea in
one setup, so we filmed in this one house and
I filmed with Josh and Zane for the majority of
this film, so I didn't really have contact with outside
characters really, so it was kind of intimate in a way.

(24:51):
And we shot almost in sequence of the movie, which
I got really lucky because sometimes you can shoot you
can start shooting, like, you know, midway through the movie,
and then you have to go back to the beginning,
and I feel like introducing the characters and shooting from
you know, the beginning of the script, it allowed us
to have like an easier start, so we got used

(25:12):
to each other, and we were meeting on camera and
kind of meeting in person for the first time, and
I got really lucky with that.

Speaker 1 (25:20):
Wow, I don't understand how how you guys as actors
can really deal with the you know, with the conception
of making a movie like that, where it's it's done
in pieces parts and then all of a sudden at
the end, the director and the editors make this movie happen.
It's like, Ah, that's not what I got on that set.
But okay, if this is what you.

Speaker 6 (25:36):
Saw, yeah, it's movie magic.

Speaker 1 (25:41):
Yeah. Because I'm an ABC type of guy, everything has
got to go one, two, three, and if it's going
one twenty five, thirteen to four, I'm going I got a.

Speaker 6 (25:48):
Forced Well maybe that's why you're not an actor.

Speaker 1 (25:52):
Yeah, there you go. Yeah, but how do you how
do you deal with it though? I mean, are you
writing a journal? How do you keep it together? Especially
when you got on the set when it comes to
these characters, because I mean, when you really get in
there and affect your true emotions, how do you come
back as a regular person?

Speaker 5 (26:09):
You know?

Speaker 6 (26:11):
A friend of mine asked me the other day. I
was driving the car with her. She's like, you have
this very seductive voice, like it's really calming, it's really essential,
and I'm like, I think I picked it up doing
a lot of character development for this, for this woman Anna,
who she plays like a cheating wife, a cheated on wife,
and then she plays herself, which is a CEO, which

(26:32):
is probably closest to my own personality. And when I
did all of this character work on her, I had
to become this femme fatale, and I studied her. I
watched a lot of movies and I used my voice,
you know, I guess my deeper voice, and it kind
of stuck with me, and you think of someone like

(26:53):
Austin Butler, who you know, has this kind of like
Elvis esque voice. Still, you stay with these characters for
long enough that they become part of you weirdly, and
I finally just realize that that it is very I'm
still very much myself, but I think the way that
I talk, I'm a bit more patient, and it comes

(27:16):
off a bit more seductive because I speak slower and
I'm more patient with what I say. So that's kind
of stuck with me throughout it. But preparing, you know,
preparing for a role is the most important thing just
being able to know your lines, know the story front
and back, and then you can play within it.

Speaker 1 (27:35):
You know, you talk about the voice and I can't
help but sit here and think about Timothy shallow May
in this new Bob Dylan movie, and I mean, because
he is so iconic with it, and I sit there
and wonder will he carry that voice with him forever?
Because there are many times Marlon Brando I would see
him in interviews and things. I'm going, oh my god,
I know that what movie he was in when he
used that voice right.

Speaker 6 (27:53):
There, right right? His normal voice is kind of similar
to that though, if you think about it, you talking
about too, he's got a really bob Yeah, he's got
a really bob voice.

Speaker 1 (28:05):
And see you feel actually your voice as well, because
I could say, it'd be fun to sit down with
you in a creative sense in creating a commercial and
go through the exercises that we have to go through.
Who are you talking to? What's your name? How many
children does she have? What is she doing in her
everyday life? Do you play these games with yourself to
get into that role?

Speaker 6 (28:24):
Kind of Yeah, you do a lot of character building
when you when you work on the script, especially when
you're leading a script and you're not just popping in
for a couple of scenes, like when I did Euphoria
and when I did that movie with Timothy, I was
just popping in for a scene. You know. It wasn't
like a full carry of a movie where you're really
developing a character that's not not yourself. So I think

(28:47):
it takes a lot of work to become this person
that's not you. And then sometimes it.

Speaker 1 (28:51):
Comes to a movie like Lovebomb. How long does it
take you as an actress to be able to say, oh,
I get the plot now because I'm living it through
the expression, the pitch, volume and tone. I'm really getting
into this dialogue now.

Speaker 6 (29:05):
I think you don't realize it until after when the
movie magic happens when you see it all cut together
and you see the lighting and the dialogue and the
rest of the film with the different scenes that you
weren't in. It kind of it builds this story, and
I think then you realize it's real when you're I
think when you're on set, obviously you've got chemistry and
you are having the experience and saying the lines. But

(29:27):
I think there is something with movie magic. It's weird
to keep bringing it back to that, but that makes
it what it is, and then you don't really realize
what it is until it is what it is.

Speaker 1 (29:40):
Is there a part of your creative process that wishes
that this could have been a binge watch because it
just it's almost like you could have spread this out
even further and you know, beyond just a regular event.

Speaker 6 (29:50):
Yeah, everyone's like, it's Ana coming back. I'm like, I
don't think she's going back. You've got to see the
end of the movie and you'll know she's probably not
gone back.

Speaker 3 (29:56):
Yeah. But see.

Speaker 1 (29:57):
The thing about it, though, is that I saw the
original Rambo where where he really dies at the end
of the movie, and then the only reason why he
kept coming back is because they went in there and
did the research and said, no, we can get a
sequel out of this thing. So you know, it's one
of those, especially and even with Marvel movies nowadays, you
can rewrite a movie, right.

Speaker 6 (30:15):
I Mean, there are some amazing movies that I had
to watch to prepare for this, like The Last Seduction
and Hard Candy. There's like a couple like Basic Instincts,
very femme fatale centric, movies, and this seems like a
fem fatale for now, for this world we're living in

(30:36):
right now, but not an inchgesy way. So I feel
like there is a storyline and a movie and a
character like this for each generation in.

Speaker 1 (30:46):
A way, see, And it's that kind of thing that
really develops that, you know, my interpretation versus my wife's
interpretation versus my neighbor's interpretation. That's what I love about
movies such as this because we were all taking something
from it at different points in the.

Speaker 6 (30:58):
Story, right right, Yeah, you can see yourself within it somehow,
or parts of parts of the character within it. And yeah,
that's why I really love playing this character. She's just
really interesting and she's maybe the person that a lot
of women want to be when you when you first
meet them, they're this totally different person and then they

(31:19):
can they can have their low point where they've you know,
been cheated on and they think there's something wrong with them,
and then they can have that conniving moment where like
they're the ones on top and they're the ones you know, cheating,
or they're the ones running the show.

Speaker 1 (31:34):
Yeah, but it creates the conversation in the way that
you know because my wife and I got into this.
I'll be very clear and transparent here. It brought up
the conversation once you've been cheated on, you become the
cheater and the transitions begin from that day forward, and
I this this movie deals with that, and to me,
it's also a healing movie for those that have gone
through this and going you know what, Okay, let's let's

(31:57):
let's just forgive, forget, let's move forward.

Speaker 5 (32:00):
Yeah.

Speaker 6 (32:00):
Yeah, it depends on who you connect with as a character,
but it shows you that you can be any of them,
and you can be all of them at once, like
all of those things which she pretends to be.

Speaker 1 (32:11):
That's why I'm horrified to go on to my little
play store and say does this app? Actually does it exist?
Because I don't want someone to come back on me
and say you don't on such and such a date,
it does exist.

Speaker 6 (32:22):
Yeah, there's definitely some kink apps. I think there's one
called Field. I mean, obviously there's like tender and Rye
and all these other regular dating apps, but there's there's
definitely apps that are focused on like roleplay and kink
versus you know, belging relationships and trying to have like
a you know, casualk up whatever, But there's there are

(32:45):
these things out there, so you've got to kind of
be careful for. But I actually think that they're more
interesting because they're so upfront, Like these kink apps, you
know what you're going into and you kind of lay
it all on the line. People that are into this
kind of role play are very communicative and they know
what they want going into it. It's not like, hey, what's up,

(33:05):
how are you? And you kind of just you kind
of go on a date and you don't know what
their intentions are.

Speaker 4 (33:10):
There.

Speaker 6 (33:10):
There is something so raw about, you know, an app
with a very strategic, you know point. So I think
it's a catch twenty two if like dating and you know,
the mystery of not knowing what somebody wants and then
you know, being completely transparent, so you just have to

(33:30):
find where you fit.

Speaker 1 (33:32):
Well, it's one of those situations because I mean, right away,
I get this vision of you knew what I was
when you picked me up, So why do you have questions?
I mean that kind of answers that question.

Speaker 6 (33:42):
Yeah, subjective, Yeah, you want them to know who you are,
but maybe you're not showing them the real side.

Speaker 1 (33:50):
Of you.

Speaker 6 (33:51):
You want them to thank you much.

Speaker 1 (33:53):
You see. It makes it entertaining as well as very scary,
and I love being in the center of all of that.

Speaker 6 (34:00):
I do too. I think it's interesting. Why go through
life being a bit boring? Why not do something interesting?

Speaker 1 (34:07):
Yeah? So, now, what did you learn from this project?
Because as an actress and somebody who really does have
that connection with people, you go in there as a student.

Speaker 6 (34:18):
What did I learn? I mean, I learned a lot
about movie making. I had only done in mainstream I'd
only done smaller guest star roles, and this is my
first time being an actual lead in a film, and
it is a lot of pressure, like everyone's looking towards
you to hold the energy and to control, especially as
an EP on the project, Like your opinion and your

(34:39):
energy is everything within this project. So for me, I
learned a lot about, you know, working with people, keeping
morale high, keeping continuity, and like being present, being attentive. Yeah,
I learned a lot about myself, and I think it's

(35:00):
doing this character work on her. It's actually allowed me
to be I think more of myself or more of
the person that I wanted to be, not necessarily vocally
like my voice that I use now, But I think
it showed me that I could slow down and I
didn't need to be so I don't know, maybe just

(35:21):
the way that I was before. It's nothing bad, but
it's just a develop of myself as a character.

Speaker 1 (35:27):
I love the fact that you're speaking of slowing down,
and the reason why is because you know, if we
can learn how to slow down through your acting in
this movie and basically have real, honest to God conversations,
because people these days are speaking so fast. I live
in the South, where people are naturally speaking slow, but
they're not. They're speaking way too fast with that Southern accent.
I don't understand anything you're saying right.

Speaker 6 (35:49):
Right, You've just got to slow down. You got to
take things as they come, and not everything is that important.
It's it'd have to be like a little like if
somebody makes a plan with me and they cancel, I'm
not it's not the end of the world. If it
happens over and over again, that's foolish for you to
keep making the plans of the person. But I feel
like there's there shouldn't be so so much of this

(36:11):
like uptightness, you know, with things in general, I think
I'm just like very easy going now, and if it happens,
it happens, and everything that's meant for me will come
to me within reason.

Speaker 1 (36:24):
You know. Now you've given me this visual of Since
we're on the subject of being calm, Are you into meditation?
Are you a journal writer? Where are you finding your
place of peace?

Speaker 5 (36:34):
No?

Speaker 6 (36:34):
I'm not, which is kind of crazy. I feel like
I do really give off that like understanding of myself
and you know, exceptions of myself. But that doesn't necessarily
mean you need to meditate. When I meditate, it fall asleep.
I don't like just it still. I went to this
acupuncturist once and he was like, your body and your
mind are disconnected, but I feel so connected.

Speaker 5 (36:57):
It's weird.

Speaker 6 (36:59):
But I I don't meditate and I don't journal, but
love I love meeting people. I think that's what I
find most interesting. Obviously, I love watching movies and TV
shows and books and stuff, But I really enjoy meeting
people and learning about their lives. And next time I
meet them again, they're like a book, Like I'm like,
what's next in this chapter of your life? And then

(37:22):
the book is kind of never ending. So I get
excited to see people again.

Speaker 1 (37:26):
That's and every bit the reason why I took on
a job at a grocery store. I just wanted to
be with people. I wanted to be with people I
didn't know, but I wanted to learn from them because
they're part of this community, this society, and it's like,
could just tell me something. I want to hold on
to it.

Speaker 5 (37:41):
Right right.

Speaker 6 (37:41):
I'm just I'm really interested in people in general. It's
kind of amazing. There's so so many people in this world,
and we are all so different, like just the way
that we grew up, our childhood, our relationships, it's all
the variables are insane, like everybody's come completely different. And
I also, as I've gotten older, I don't judge people

(38:05):
as much as I did. I think when I was
younger I tried not to even then, But I feel
like I have more empathy now for people who act
the way they do because of stuff that might have
happened in their life that shaped their decision to you know,
do X y Z. So I think I've learned to
be more empathetic over the years.

Speaker 1 (38:23):
Oh my god, I love the grumpy old man because
I take that as a challenge and I'll go and
I'll and I'll just sit there and say, so, what's
going on today?

Speaker 5 (38:29):
Man?

Speaker 1 (38:29):
Talk to me? Hey, how you doing? And because they
they're just looking for someone that understands I'm a grumpy
old man, okay, and this guy's gonna listen to me.
And so I love it. Just show me your emotions
and let's just create a solution.

Speaker 7 (38:44):
Yeah.

Speaker 6 (38:44):
Yeah, And I love people that are open minded. I
meet a lot of older people that are either totally
against the grain or they're with the change. And those
people that embrace the change are ones that are are
going to keep you know, you know, an open mind
and be happy and just joy, you know, enjoy everything
that's happening around them.

Speaker 1 (39:02):
Wow. So where can people go to find the movie
love Bomb and to find out more about you as
you continue to grow? Because I'm gonna be very honest
with you. You have a presence in this movie and you
can visibly see it, and you sit there and you go,
please let me have more of what she is doing,
because this is really working.

Speaker 6 (39:19):
You want to go on a date with her.

Speaker 1 (39:24):
Rear?

Speaker 7 (39:26):
Yeah?

Speaker 5 (39:26):
Yeah, I would.

Speaker 6 (39:28):
You can see love momb on Amazon Prime and then
you can follow me on Instagram at Jesse Andrews and
then that's pretty much it. Wow, many more plucks to
go in there.

Speaker 1 (39:39):
Well, you've got to come back to this show. You
got to come back to this show anytime in the
future because the door is always going to be open
for you.

Speaker 6 (39:45):
Thank you so much.

Speaker 1 (39:47):
Well, you'd be brilliant, and thank you for your transparency today.

Speaker 6 (39:51):
Thank you. It was great talking with you.

Speaker 1 (39:53):
Thank you, Please do not move. Coming up next, we're
gonna get a little freaky with April Blasco, who's father
was a serial killer. Hey, thanks for coming back to
my day of play. Let's get into that conversation with
April Bolusco, whose father was a serial killer.

Speaker 3 (40:11):
Good morning, Arrow, Hey, how are you doing today?

Speaker 6 (40:13):
Bill?

Speaker 3 (40:14):
I'm good. How you do with my friend?

Speaker 5 (40:16):
Man?

Speaker 1 (40:16):
I wish you guys were here because nine deer just
walked by my studio window. I love this forest and
I love the nature that's out there. Man, they're so beautiful.
They've got their winter coats and everything on right now.

Speaker 3 (40:25):
I know, I know, I you know what.

Speaker 8 (40:27):
Every once in a while we'll catch one when I
drive down the block. Actually, last year I saw a
couple like two of them walk past my house. But
then maybe like a quarter of a mile down, we
have this little park in like this.

Speaker 3 (40:41):
Wooded area, and there's always you know, deer. I just
I get so nervous that they're gonna run out.

Speaker 8 (40:46):
Into the street because it's so it's right, the street
is right there.

Speaker 3 (40:51):
In fact, I've seen it before.

Speaker 8 (40:52):
But no, you know what, growing up in Queens, New York,
we didn't have deer there.

Speaker 3 (40:59):
We didn't have bunny rabbits like we do now. We
had you know, possum and rack the squirrels. It's about it.
And they were men. Yeah.

Speaker 8 (41:13):
Coming out to Long Island, it's, uh, it's like I'm
living out in.

Speaker 3 (41:17):
The uh the wild. Uh what do you want to
call it. It's just a total different.

Speaker 1 (41:25):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (41:25):
Where where where are you at that you're in the wood?

Speaker 1 (41:29):
I'm here in South Charlotte, North Carolina. We planted seventeen
hundred trees in nineteen ninety seven so to help, you know,
fortify this, because I really wanted to bring this land
back so that nature would come back. Because they always
had these signs that said, you know, deer crossing. Never
once did I see a deer in nineteen ninety two,
but once we planted these trees and I started letting
this forest grow. I mean, all of a sudden, the

(41:49):
hawks came back, the you know, the eagles. I mean,
it's just it's just it's just been phenomenal.

Speaker 7 (41:54):
It should be a very good, very good I live
in the country as well.

Speaker 1 (41:58):
I don't.

Speaker 7 (41:59):
I don't see him just because just the way my
property is, because I have I have all kinds of
animals myself.

Speaker 2 (42:05):
I live on a small homestead.

Speaker 6 (42:07):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (42:07):
I just just there's something about them. And first of all,
I have a relationship with the soil and you being
out there with that land. Don't you have one as well?

Speaker 2 (42:16):
I do?

Speaker 5 (42:16):
I do.

Speaker 2 (42:17):
So are do you grow things? I try to.

Speaker 7 (42:19):
I grow a lot of things. I try to harvest
and preserve what I grow. With you planting the trees,
do you do a lot of propagation?

Speaker 1 (42:28):
Well, what we do is I'll tell you what, because
I jokingly say that I'm a forest farmer. What happens
is as these trees continue to grow and they get older,
we need to thin it out a little bit. What
I try to do is let people who use wood
as energy, I allow them to come in and take
the wood so they can use it and this way
their fuel costs will be lower for the winter.

Speaker 5 (42:47):
Very good.

Speaker 2 (42:48):
That's wonderful.

Speaker 1 (42:50):
Wow. Now what's wonderful is the way that you're able
to speak on a page. And I got to tell you,
when the letters, the newspapers, the videos that you watch,
the research that you did, have you had that opportunity
yet to sit back and just breathe. Because you have
put so much into this.

Speaker 2 (43:08):
I try to steal the moments that I can.

Speaker 7 (43:13):
And like I said, living on the homestead with the
animals has helped. Matter of fact, I don't know if
you can hear them suckling in the background, but my
dog just gave birth to eleven puppies and for the
first time, I brought in some eggs to see if
I could hatch, and they just hatched. So I put
them on my coffee table because I didn't know where

(43:35):
else to put them, and they're chirping away. So I
find solace in, you know, with a land like that
you were talking about and with my animals.

Speaker 1 (43:45):
Well, see, that to me is full circle. That is
nature giving to you, which will inspire the creative self
that you are to keep growing because what you're doing
is you're giving us on the outside world something to
hold on to as well. You had to have that
inner strength in order to put this book together, and
it's coming that and they're just giving it back to you.

Speaker 2 (44:03):
Well, I find it very rewarding, and I would agree
with you on that. You know, nature is very.

Speaker 1 (44:09):
Healing for you to put this together. What did it
really take? Because I'm a daily writer, I've been keeping
a journal for thirty years. I know what's in those pages.
How were you able to edit and keep it straight?

Speaker 2 (44:24):
Writing this book?

Speaker 7 (44:26):
I can honestly say without any hesitation that it was
the hardest thing I have ever done in my life.
And it took about five years. And as far as
the writing process, it was about the last year and
a half. And it was when I started out and
when I started to try this, I knew that I
needed to have a collaborator with me, not because not

(44:46):
only was this story so intricate, at least the way
that I wanted to tell it, and trying to, you know,
put it down on paper, and then dealing with my
emotional rollercoaster myself reliving it and trying to dive into
my memories.

Speaker 2 (45:05):
I hired a collaborator.

Speaker 7 (45:08):
And I've got to give a shout out to Lily
because she was awesome and she was so patient with me,
because one minute I might be telling a story and
laughing with her, then the next minute I'm i my
voice might be raised in anger because of what I
had witnessed and retelling that, or I might be crying.

(45:28):
And then I was so adamant as to how what
I wanted my book to say and how.

Speaker 2 (45:35):
It read that you know, I kept. I would tell Lily, no, no,
that's not what I'm trying to say, and she's like, okay,
well let's try this again.

Speaker 7 (45:42):
She would have me talk, and you know, so it
was meticulously going through literally every sentence and paragraph and
getting it to where I'm like, Okay, that sounds like me.

Speaker 5 (45:54):
This is me.

Speaker 2 (45:56):
And it was very hard and very demanding. And I
don't never want to write another book.

Speaker 1 (46:01):
Oh come on now, no no no, no, no no no,
you can't do that because you're already the author and
it's given to us now, so the universe is gonna
knocking on your heart.

Speaker 2 (46:10):
Well, you know what I think I would like to
do is.

Speaker 7 (46:15):
Instead of writing books or any other books, I would
like I'm looking into this.

Speaker 2 (46:19):
I used to be a public speaker long ago in
my high school years, and when I was a young mother,
I was into public speaking. Not about my dad's story.

Speaker 7 (46:28):
Or even about my story about my dad, but it
had to do with, you know, being a young mom
and my beliefs in that. So I'm looking into the
possibility of becoming a public speaker taking on some public
speaking engagements regarding my story.

Speaker 2 (46:44):
And if I did that, I would love.

Speaker 7 (46:46):
I would love the aspect of engaging with my audience,
hoping that I could reach more people help them because
there's so many no one may not have the exact
story like that. I really think mine's unique, but so
many families, so many people grew up in dysfunctional families

(47:07):
and have so many hidden scars, and especially in the
generation that I came from, we were taught not to
talk about things that went on in your family.

Speaker 1 (47:17):
Shit that's it, yep, so true, so true.

Speaker 7 (47:20):
And learning to talk about it has become very healing.
And I never realized how healing that was that was
going to be until I started talking about it. So
my collaborator, Lucy not Lucy Lily, she was also kind
of like a therapist. I tell her all the time

(47:42):
how much I appreciate her, and she took on a
lot more than she bargained for.

Speaker 1 (47:46):
Yeah, but you know what you've got here, though, April,
is the fact that you are using your voice. And
Mark Twain was very adamant about that for all authors,
if you aren't using your voice, then you're borrowing somebody else's.
Therefore it's not your story. So the fact that you
really did find folks in trying to figure out how
you were going to be on that page, that's a
brilliant first step.

Speaker 2 (48:06):
Thank you for saying that.

Speaker 7 (48:07):
And I don't know if I said this earlier, but
my goal was to take the reader on that emotional
journey that I went on because my life was very
much an emotional rollercoaster, and I wanted people to experience that.
I wanted people to see my dad through my eyes.
I love my dad, but yet I feared him. My

(48:29):
dad was the life of the party. He loved to entertain,
he had people over all the time. He was very charismatic.
But on the other flip side, he was very violent.
He abused my mom, he abused us kids, and of
course now we know how he killed people, but at

(48:50):
the same time, people loved him, and that's why I
think that's one of the reasons why he got away
with what he did for so long, because people didn't
suspect him.

Speaker 1 (49:00):
Yeah, you know, it's it's almost like that one you know,
it happens in the newspaper every day. It's always that
one guy that we you know, who would have thought
it was that guy that would be doing it, And
your father seems to be that guy.

Speaker 2 (49:13):
Exactly exactly.

Speaker 7 (49:14):
And then the other thing that he did is every
place that we moved, he.

Speaker 2 (49:18):
Would befriend a local local law.

Speaker 7 (49:20):
Enforcement officer, a police department, or an FBI agent, and
he would feed them information about local thieves or con men.
So he and you know, became there. Well, he was
a snitch.

Speaker 2 (49:39):
You know, it's exactly what he was. He was a snitch.

Speaker 7 (49:42):
And but that made him feel uh, you know, grand
that that made him feel good.

Speaker 2 (49:50):
And I can't think of the exact word I'm looking
for at the moment, but he got off on that.

Speaker 7 (49:55):
He was thrilled with that. And I also the other
thing that he did is the crimes that he committed.
He was notorious looking back now, notorious for leading the
authorities to investigate other people that steered them away from him.

Speaker 1 (50:12):
Wow. Wow, See that's a genius at heart right there,
because they know how to work the game.

Speaker 2 (50:18):
Yes, yes, wow.

Speaker 7 (50:20):
And you know, here's another thing, And this is the
one thing I haven't shared on any of the other
interviews that are done, but I do believe I said
it in my book.

Speaker 2 (50:27):
My dad could look.

Speaker 7 (50:28):
Law enforcement, you know, an FBI agent, a police officer
in the eye and lie to them and they had
no clue, no clue.

Speaker 2 (50:38):
They believed him. He was so good and he was
so good at lying that I actually think that he
believed some of his own minds. And I say that,
I say that sincerely. I really do.

Speaker 1 (50:52):
You speak of something in the book that I wish
more people would bring out and put it in conversations.
You speak about the silent fear. Do you know there
are millions of people on this planet every day that
deal with silent fear.

Speaker 2 (51:07):
That doesn't surprise me. It doesn't surprise me at all.

Speaker 7 (51:09):
And you know, and that's one of the things that
breaks my heart. And I'm hoping that people will gather
some courage from my book and start speaking out because
I'm very adamant in stating that I'm not a victim.

(51:31):
I refuse to put on that mantle. I refuse to
be a victim. I tell people I'm a survivor. I
don't want to have that mentality, a victimhood, because once
we have that mentality of being a victim, we start
blaming others for our actions. And I you know, we
see that in society today, and we can make choices.

Speaker 2 (51:52):
We can make the choice to speak.

Speaker 7 (51:54):
Out, even though it's so difficult and very hard, and
we just need to find the right person to do
that with. And when we speak out, we start that
healing process. And if we don't, we harbor that inside
and we keep that inside of us, and we become
bitter people, we develop health problems, whether mentally or physically.

(52:19):
And I'm hoping that my book will encourage others to
speak out who have who are living in that silent fear.

Speaker 1 (52:28):
You've dedicated your book to David and Judy. I would
love for you to share the story as to why
they get the dedication, because when people go into your book,
and that's one of the first things that we identify with,
I just want them to know who they are from
your voice, Okay, I'm going to try.

Speaker 2 (52:45):
To get through this with help Ry David Judy. Dave
was the father of Tim Haak.

Speaker 7 (52:53):
He was one of the victims of the Sweetheart murders
up in Wisconsin in nineteen eighty and Dave and Judy
are Christians. They love the Lord, and when my dad
got arrested, they actually wrote a letter to my mom,
reaching out to my mom. And I read the letter,
and my mom didn't want to write back, didn't want

(53:14):
to open up that line of communication, and I didn't
feel like I could, so I just let it go
because the letter wasn't addressed to me. But eventually David
Judy reached out through me through Detective Garcia, and they
traveled from Wisconsin to my home up in Ohio, and
they came to my home and the first thing that

(53:35):
they did when they walked through the door.

Speaker 2 (53:38):
Was they gave me a hug.

Speaker 7 (53:42):
And the love that radiated from them and the forgiveness,
and I later found out, no, here's I'm going to
try to lighten this a little bit. One of the
things that I found out later from Dave was Dave
was expecting me to be some kind of fluozy uh

(54:03):
and I don't even know what all adjunctives he used
to describe me. But here he was pleasant pleasantly surprised too,
that you know, I lived in a nice home, I.

Speaker 2 (54:13):
Had a I was married for a long time.

Speaker 7 (54:16):
I've since been divorced, but I was married for thirty years,
had three children, I was a homemaker, had a very
stable life.

Speaker 2 (54:23):
IM a Christian myself.

Speaker 7 (54:25):
So not only I guess they were pleasantly surprised as
well as I was, but.

Speaker 2 (54:31):
They were just, you know, and we when they came to.

Speaker 7 (54:33):
My home, we I just asked them questions about Tim
and how Tim grew up, and then they in turn
just asked questions about me, you know, how was my
life like, what was my father like? About my kids?
We just it was just a beautiful conversation. And I

(54:54):
decided that to dedicate the book to them.

Speaker 1 (54:58):
Oh my god. Oh see, that's the reason why I
asked the question, because I want listeners and I want
readers to know exactly and to feel your emotions. So
here's the thing you were talking about. You wanted to
become a public speaker. I think you need a podcast too.
If you're going to go out there and you're going
to do public speaking. You can take that story and
those emotions and you can change people's lives because look
at how many fathers are in prison today and the

(55:20):
children are at home going well, who are they? What
were they like? What happened? You've answered a lot of
questions inside this book.

Speaker 7 (55:30):
And you know that was something that I made. I
told you about making choices. My dad made the choices
that he made, and they were not good choices.

Speaker 2 (55:38):
But from a very.

Speaker 7 (55:39):
Young age, I realized and that was not because of
what I experienced with other families, because my dad very
much kept us in a bubble, but through the TV,
you know, like Little House on the Prairie and other shows,
that there was a different life out there.

Speaker 2 (55:57):
There's a different way of living.

Speaker 7 (55:59):
Than the way that we were living. And I knew
from a young age, and not just me, but my
other siblings. We knew from a young age that we
did not want to live the life.

Speaker 2 (56:08):
That my dad was living, that my mom was living.
We did not want to grow up.

Speaker 7 (56:12):
In the dilapidated homes without running water or electricity.

Speaker 2 (56:16):
And not only did.

Speaker 7 (56:17):
I, but my siblings, we all made choices. We knew
we had to get an education or to the best
of our ability to get that education. We knew we
had to make choices, life decisions from a young age
to start us on that path so that we didn't
end up like our father. And now you know, so

(56:39):
you know we, like I said, we refuse.

Speaker 2 (56:41):
I refuse to be a victim.

Speaker 7 (56:43):
And those are choices that I as hard as they were,
the choices that I've decided to make. And that's the
people that you know, their father you mentioned their fathers
in prison. They do not have to be a product
of that environment. They can raise is above it. And
especially nowadays, it's so much easier. There's so many programs

(57:05):
out there that are available to people in those situations
that were not available when.

Speaker 2 (57:12):
I was growing up.

Speaker 7 (57:13):
You know, looking back, I could have got my college
paid for for free. I didn't know that at the time,
so I and as far as the podcast, I would
be open to it, but I get so emotional and that.

Speaker 2 (57:32):
I think people would get annoyed with me and be like, oh, she's.

Speaker 5 (57:34):
Crying a dead.

Speaker 1 (57:38):
April. You've got to come back to this show anytime
in the future. I love where your heart is.

Speaker 7 (57:43):
Well, thank you, I'll come back anytime.

Speaker 2 (57:47):
Invite me anytime.

Speaker 1 (57:48):
I will. Will you be brilliant today?

Speaker 2 (57:50):
Okay, you too, and you have a great holiday