Distractions

Let them go without explanation #ashsaidit

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
What's up? What to do? Cyber World? It is your girl,
the one and only Ash Brown, And this is Ashbrown
Uncensored on this program. Gonna talk a little bit about everything.
It may be pop culture related, but it's probably Ashbrown related.
So you gotta stay to n to see what I'm
gonna talk about. And today's no different. So yes, we're

(00:21):
going to be Ashbrown related today. I woke up this
morning thankful, grateful, and a funny thing happened. I actually
remembered my dream, and in this dream was a reminder
to not let someone play in your face, not let

(00:42):
somebody waste your time. And when I was thirty nine,
which was only a few years ago, when I was
thirty nine, I was faced with a situation. Okay, I'll
go back to this. We all have had friends, family,

(01:03):
situationships that categorically were a waste of time. And so
the moral and the theme of what I want to
talk about today is don't let anybody waste your time.
Don't let anybody play in your face. The minute that
you understand that there's disloyalty, dishonesty, any kind of just

(01:27):
bad energy, you have a choice. Are you going to
continue with this situation or are you going to save
your peace? It's as simple as that. So throughout the years,

(01:48):
I've had many friendships, situationships, connections with people that I
knew were not good people. They showed me through thought, word,
or deed that they would slit someone's throat to get
a hat. Well, that's a dangerous person to be around.

(02:09):
If a person shows you who they are, that's really
who they are, You're no different. If they get an
opportunity to slit your throat in order to jump ahead,
they're going to take it, point blank, period. They're going
to take it. Now. It's up to you to decide. Hmm,
I've seen this person. It's this bad actor here, you know,

(02:32):
in my life, behaving badly. What should I do? The
choice was really yours. I got tired of dealing with
people that were disingenuine and I just start cutting people off.
I just stop cutting people off. I got to a

(02:53):
point in life where my peace was more valuable than
their friendship, that my piece was more valuable than their feeling,
that my piece was more valuable than any history that
we had together. My piece is everything, it really is.
So I had to cut off friends one in which

(03:16):
I had for over thirty six years. It's a long
time to be friends with someone, one of my very
first friends. When we moved to Georgia, I had to
cut that connection. And so my dream last night I
was pondering over a situationship from years and years ago.

(03:43):
In my thirties, I dealt with a lot of people,
a lot of connections that were just not good, just
not good. Didn't benefit me, benefited them, but they were distractions, distractions,

(04:07):
And this dream was a reminder to me is not
to let a distraction in for too long. You know,
distractions sometimes it helps you to catch that beaten life,
you know, and catch your breath and a moment of
reflection and you can kind of chill and things of
that nature. But this distraction in particular, I didn't trust

(04:32):
from the start. I did not trust him from the start,
and I knew he was not a good of good
moral fiber. I just knew it just in his actions.
And all people will be like, oh my god, well
why did you just continue dealing with him? Why did

(04:52):
you continue the you know, the communication and stuff. Well,
sometimes you need something to to distract you from everyday
life and everything that's going on and he did that
for me. He absolutely did that for me. Was he handsome,

(05:14):
absolutely charismatic. Yes, But I knew in the beginning this
is not the type of guy that I would ever
take serious, and vice versa, this is not a guy
that would take me serious. So sometimes convenience can be intoxicating.

(05:42):
Convenience can be intoxic, and y'all, I'm serious, I'm so serious.
So this was a situationship that went on for far, far,
far too long, and I take full responsibility. It's my
father did went on as long as I did. You know,
the point where I did kind of cut him off.

(06:04):
But the minute that he realized he was getting cut off,
he made himself known and we went back to the
same type of norms, the same type of vibes, the
same type of communication, and it just continued. So the

(06:25):
last time I saw him was before I took my
last airline job and I went to a charter and
I knew in that moment, I was like, I don't
need to deal with him. He has no goals set,
he's in his fifties, he doesn't share the interests that

(06:46):
I share. We don't have that much in common outside
of him. Also, being black in America in Georgia, there's
really not a whole bunch that we have in common.
And I'm leveling up my life. I'm leveling up. I'm

(07:10):
not dealing with people that don't have a goal that
I have set that people that aren't trying to level
up their life, the people that are so distracted by
all the distractions in the world. I don't have the
time and the energy for that. So in that moment,
I didn't I took the cowardy way out. I'm not

(07:30):
gonna lie. I didn't actually tell you I'm hey, you know,
I'm cutting you off. But I just stopped communication because
I had a new job that had my focus. I
had a whole new group of friends, I had coworkers.
I'm literally traveling around the world. I don't have time
for your small town stuff. And that probably sounds really

(07:51):
terrible to me. It probably does, but that's totally where
I was, yoh like, and so I kind of stopped
communicating with him, you know. And then there came a
point where, Yeah, you're traveling around the world and you
are just like deprived of sleep and you're just looking

(08:15):
for some distraction. So I text him, right, I text him.
We got to chatting again, and I'm telling him about
the job and all that stuff, and so again it's
I take responsibility. It's my fault, so I I forget.
I think. Yeah, we were texting back and forth for

(08:36):
the longest and so when I finally got back to
my base, he facetimed me. Well, in the years that
we've known each other, he's never facetiming, and I've never
facetimed him. I feel like that's like a very intimate
thing to do with, like somebody that like you're dating,
or you know, one of your homegirls that you know,

(08:56):
you're trying to show him the outfit or whatever. He's
never face timing. I've never facetimed him, So I thought
was strange, but I was like whatever. So we're talking
and everything, and out of nowhere, y'all completely unprovoked, he
flashes his peak and I'm like, thank you for reminding

(09:18):
me where I need to cut you off completely, thank you,
thank you, thank you, Like you can't even have an
adult conversation with someone without it just getting to that
place of inappropriateness. And I was completely and totally turned
off by him completely, and in that moment I knew,

(09:43):
I'm never going to talk to this asshole again. Nope,
I'm not gonna talk toone again because he obviously has
someone else on to the mine. And I was just
reminded then again, this guy was a distraction you as
a placeholder in your life, and you allow this placeholder

(10:06):
to be longer and past this expiration, past past the
expiration day. So the moral of the story is this,
do not allow people in your life that are going
to waste your time. Do not pour into cups that
aren't pouring back into you. Do not allow people to

(10:29):
take advantage of a kind heart, because they will. Takers
are notorious for taking. They're gonna take, take, take, take, take.
As long as you allow them to, they're gonna take.
They're going to continue to take. So a great person

(10:53):
in life, But don't allow people to distract you from
your purpose because sometimes it's hard to get back on track,
it's hard to hit those goals, and you deserve the best.
You deserve to hit every one of those goals. You
deserve not to be distracted, and you deserve the best

(11:17):
in life. And that's something that I have to remind
myself every day, every week, every moment, because sometimes it's life.
We're flesh, we're weak, and we need a reminder that
we are worthy, we are worth it, and we deserve it.

(11:37):
So don't let nobody waste your time, don't let nobody
play in your face, don't let nobody have you out
here and debt you spending money and stuff on people.
I ain't spend no money on him, so I understand
that it was no money exchange, no, but it's time
that you will never get back, time that you could've

(12:02):
poured into something that was going to harvest something for you.
And that's basically that. So that's my little tidbit. Don't
let nobody waste your time and distractions. I'm'a tell you,
distractions will distract you, child, They will distract you. So anyways,

(12:24):
i'm'a holler at y'all later, Douces