5 questions

5 questions about llife and manhood

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:13):
Your relation, your relay quick.

Speaker 2 (00:19):
I got my brother in my tribute. You come up, baby, think.

Speaker 1 (00:27):
No helpful can come up? Brother. You come from my.

Speaker 3 (00:37):
Rocking me, my lockey bla black pan and my money
little lean yeah b road, think you're why you were
from now on your baby, yeah rebel, that's my money bag, bob.

Speaker 1 (00:56):
My being this fucking thing.

Speaker 3 (00:59):
I just roll and I'm man, I'm gonna plant like
down and don't know he made my fu co mam.

Speaker 1 (01:04):
And I don't make friends off my bo anyway.

Speaker 2 (01:08):
Your people and or not better when I went better
than some so kill.

Speaker 1 (01:14):
You can get my head.

Speaker 3 (01:17):
I'm getting wins, gave another game and I want to
do them some time.

Speaker 1 (01:25):
To look at like a me like pipe six, I
a lie but threes of the time and I'm like
fucking they see me and I'm getting like and that
what was easy? And we've never been broken up a
turn and the girl probably broke your quean.

Speaker 2 (01:36):
I got my brother in my cot they cry, my buddy,
can't it be fake?

Speaker 1 (01:44):
A knuckle up and not.

Speaker 2 (01:47):
Just my love.

Speaker 3 (01:48):
I got my brother in my fe tripping car bout
my body, come by that beat the knuckle love and nothing.

Speaker 1 (01:58):
I'm so hard.

Speaker 2 (02:01):
I don't need nobody else around me, bitch. I got
my brother Sidi, trust some motherfucker.

Speaker 4 (02:06):
All you niggas on the cool slip with niggas undercovers,
bad and boosie bitches lovers bing the fuck with out
a rubber bitch mustake that I'm gonna suck down.

Speaker 2 (02:14):
Don't play me fucking on lame. I got my gang
of business. Bitch. We do no spit box and leave
it stains a.

Speaker 4 (02:20):
Business bitch, blood suck the motherfucker show my fings and
the business.

Speaker 2 (02:23):
Bitch gotta scope on my a. I'm blown ranging up.

Speaker 4 (02:27):
The motherfucker want to ge get in and I'm gone, Fellowshi,
take a minute to get in the back one tacking
the back to the back of the life. You notice
fact that I'm gonna give me your pack of that
strong niggas want to people the game, but I'm a niggas.

Speaker 2 (02:35):
A bag like the biggie soldier. Bitch keep blowing my
line said that, no no mind, and she can't wait
to give me that ball. Huh yeah, right through.

Speaker 4 (02:41):
The little with the folk like traveling a mile of
the blow like, oh pass it this side with your
whole like she want to deep down and the thought like,
oh shit is too easy. All of you niggas too bumming.
You're peasy fucking a round with one of my brothers.
I promise you niggas would't have the rest the lean
in my cut, my buddy.

Speaker 2 (03:10):
Yeah, yeah, we are live. Welcome, Welcome, Welcome, Welcome to
the first premier show of Beyond the Beard. This is
something new that I uh, that I came up with
with the help of my beautiful lady, of course, bringing

(03:31):
behind a lot of my you know, a lot of
my stuff. But as I said, man, welcome to Beyond
the Beard. This is basically an unfiltered barbershop talk that
goes deeper than the fresh fade. This podcast is a
real conversation space for men who are ready to explore
life beyond appearances. Hosted by voices you can trust, Beyond

(03:52):
the Beard dods into everything from love and relationships to
financial stability, fatherhood, personal growth, and the power of vulnerability. Here,
manhood isn't just about being strong, It's about being real,
respectful and responsible. Pull up a chair, lean back, and
let's talk like men who give a damn how y'all
feeling good? Just to let y'all know. In case y'all

(04:16):
be like, it's beyond the beard, why is there a
lady there? She doesn't have a beard, But just let
you know, I just wanted to introduce y'all to my lady, right,
J level, Right, I just wanted to I wanted to
introduce you all to my lady KB. We're also going

(04:37):
to be having uh, you know, female guests on the
show as well to also give you know, a different
perspective on things from his female standpoint. And also there
are gonna be things that we as men are not
going to understand from women or about women that women
can give us a clear understanding of and about. So

(05:00):
my lady, she's she's very logical for the most part
level headed.

Speaker 1 (05:08):
Was that like a compliment or was it.

Speaker 2 (05:12):
For thet she's pretty level headed. You know, you gotta
push her there to get to make her become unleveled
as with anybody. But yeah, that's my lady. So she's
gonna be you know, chiming there from time to time
on certain shows, not every show, but you know, certain shows,
she'll be here to give her perspective as long as
as well as with other female guests that we're going

(05:34):
to be having come on to the show as well.
So that is that. And y'all know this guy off
to the motherfucking building. How you feeling, brother, how you
feeling I'm doing I'm going, I'm going. I'm It's been

(05:55):
up to you here to be back.

Speaker 5 (05:56):
Man.

Speaker 2 (05:56):
I've been on a lot of a lot of ship man,
you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 6 (06:00):
Tony still doing the music, Yeah, working on Actually I'm
in the movie right now.

Speaker 2 (06:07):
That's a that's in amazing. Okay.

Speaker 6 (06:10):
I've really been focusing on the music and acting lately.
A lot a couple of scripts I've been working on
as well, So you know, I've been really doing the
film and the music thing ladly. So you know, okay, cool,
motherfucking show will be back. But it will not be back,
is what you know it as as a podcast. It
will be back as a live variety show like Living Color.

(06:32):
That's and l type of thing. That's why I'm trying
to grid toward. So okay, you wanna.

Speaker 2 (06:36):
Look out for that.

Speaker 1 (06:37):
So for the newer viewers that may not necessarily know you,
Like if you had to give your elevator pitch of
what you do, who you are, what would.

Speaker 6 (06:45):
It look like, go Tony motherfucking Maids. I'm I'm an
entertainer of all sorts. It's easier to google me. I
have my own brand m f K and uh my
fear nose none, but everybody usually puts it as motherfucking Maids,
motherfucking Entertainment Network. It's a TV channel actually Internet TV channel,
also under construction right now. So a lot of things

(07:07):
I got going on is kind of I'm in the
building of taking it to the next level. Ten years
of podcast right here in my city, my music. So
you know who I am, dyl you know what I'm saying.
I didn't gabble in a few things. It's it's just
easier to google the man. Just google Tony motherfucking is
m m K N M.

Speaker 2 (07:25):
A Z E can check me out, all right, And
there's that. And of course, well like y'all, y'all you
know who I am. But for those of y'all who don't,
my name is Montager Rebel. I am an artist, entertainer, uh,
working man, business owner. Were all so soule expression socks.

(07:52):
You can look that up on Facebook and instagram s
O L E E x p R E S S
I o n s socks, good quality socks about it. Yeah,
great quality socks. Do good work. You do that. You
got your songs. That's dope, that's that's quite good plug,

(08:13):
good plug, good plug. So yeah, along with my lady,
she's also co owner of the company. Yeah, and you know,
we make socks. She doesn't really like to do shirts,
she hates it, but we do that as well. Uh, shirts, hoodies, uh,
you know whatever. You know, vinyl sublimation, y'all can tap

(08:35):
in with us for all of those needs. Okay, so
we're gonna start. We're gonna get off into the show today.
I have, like I said Tony Mass on the show
as a guest, what and what we're doing is having
grown folk conversation, grown man conversation. So we're gonna start
with a few questions. I have five questions. You can

(08:57):
answer these questions any way that you feel, you know,
answer them truthfully, of course, but whatever you're comfortable, whatever
you're comfortable with telling, whatever you're comfortable with. So if
it's a question that I don't want to answer, none
of these are questions that you don't want to answer.
These are nothing nothing about these questions, are you know? Yeah,

(09:21):
this ain't that, This ain't that. So you're ready, all right, cool?
Now these questions that some of these questions that you
know it's it's gonna involve you getting maybe a little
deep personal may open up the door for a storytelling
event or whatever gets into some of these questions are

(09:43):
gonna get into your your values, your growth, cultural shifts
within your life. Some questions may again encourage vulnerability and insight.
Some questions may make you reflect on uh wisdom, it

(10:07):
can break out. Some questions may make you bring out
some regrets. Some questions may make you you know, she said, you.

Speaker 1 (10:18):
Look a little nervous.

Speaker 2 (10:19):
Nah, really I can stand on business right right. So
the first question, what moment in your life shape you
the most into the man that you are today? Losing

(10:40):
my losing my ex fiance and my grandy and then
within two weeks of wee the other like because like.

Speaker 6 (10:52):
Like I was, I've always been like ambitious, go getting
like music always been a part of my life. So
like something that I've always done, as we all though,
it becomes second nature, so you just do it without
thinking right right right, So a lot of stuff I
did I took for granted, so to speak, you know

(11:13):
what I'm saying. So like, after seeing somebody who was
my ex fiance was younger than me, so like to
actually watch her go through having cancer and die and
all of that like put life in a whole lot
of different perspective for me. It really put in the

(11:33):
fact that you don't know what could happen to who
when were like it's that's the reality of that really
set in.

Speaker 2 (11:40):
And then not even really truly grieving yet through that.

Speaker 6 (11:46):
And then my grandmama died from cancer as well, the
bone marrow cancer, so like, and I didn't even know
if she was sick. So like it was crazy because
like what my grandmama was nobody like you already knew
what she told you got it, you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 2 (12:01):
It wasn't like she was. She wasn't in the hospital,
you know what I'm saying. So like it.

Speaker 6 (12:08):
You had to know to know type of thing, you
know what I'm saying. So like, she never really was
the one that be going around telling everybody I'm seeing
woo woo. So it was like it it was them
almost a shock for mem cause we were so close
and so for life for me to like not know
it's crazy for me because I just didn't see it. Mm.
So it it it really, it really let me know

(12:30):
that I really wasn't paying attention to the right shit
in life, so to speak, you know what I'm saying.
So with having to learn all of that at one
time and one real real fast and then literally a
month or two late, I learned that my twins on
the way, so I ain't really have time to.

Speaker 2 (12:52):
To worry about me so to speak. You know what
I'm saying. I had to get in, get in girl,
and get my life together.

Speaker 6 (12:58):
Fuck for them, cause you know, are you single and
you ain't got kids, you can do what you won't
spend money, how you won't move, how you won't do
what you want.

Speaker 2 (13:05):
You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 6 (13:06):
But like when when you got kids, just like right
through your face, you gotta move differently, so you know
what I'm saying. So even that in itself changed me
to be a whole different person, because you know, you know.

Speaker 2 (13:19):
I fuck I need I want to do cause it's
you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 6 (13:23):
So I've always been a man who had his own
his own shit going, so I could I could do
what I want to do. You know what I'm saying,
and that ain't have nothing holding me back. So I
did what I wanted to do, move how I want
to do. And then in the process of all, I'm
pretty sure I've hurt a lot of people, you know
what I'm saying. So and in that growth, I've learned
that I may have heard a lot of people, but

(13:44):
you know, before that.

Speaker 2 (13:45):
I was like fuck it.

Speaker 1 (13:45):
It's like, so for the viewers that may not know
how long ago was that that you experienced that type.

Speaker 6 (13:50):
Of try, it might be like five maybe six years ago.
That ain't too long ago. That wasn't too long ago,
Like that just really recently happened.

Speaker 2 (13:57):
So like.

Speaker 6 (13:59):
Again, when you when you don't have certain responsibilities, you
moved differently, you know what I'm saying. So, like I
really didn't have a album. My responsibility was me for real,
you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 (14:13):
So what the babies come in kind of had to
step it up and yeah, you know.

Speaker 6 (14:17):
What I'm saying, So like the what it is and
they won't get shit. So I'm happy with who I
am at, you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 (14:23):
I really so as a man, how do you deal
with that type of trauma, right, but still, like, do
you feel that you've actually dealt with the trauma and
healed from it, because because it's kind of like you're saying,
you know, I had this trauma and then I had
to jump into you know, like getting my shit together immediately.

(14:44):
So like, what do you think you did or have
you tried to heal from that? Or did it just
go to I didn't have time.

Speaker 2 (14:51):
He really didn't have time. Yeah, because I know that
for a fact. I was there. I know he didn't
have time.

Speaker 1 (14:57):
But that was so long ago, from five years ago, right,
So have you like tried to take well, we all know.

Speaker 2 (15:02):
Grief, don't have no time to step on it, you
know what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 (15:05):
So, but I think my question is were you taking
the steps at any time to try to heal.

Speaker 6 (15:10):
From I found myself trying to because I know I
had to type of thing. To say that I completely
have would be a lie. But I have definitely taken
steps within myself because I know I got to because
it's certain places I can't sit in. Yeah, you know
what I'm saying, to be productive from people that's here

(15:31):
on earth. You see what I'm saying, And that's what
it comes down to, like when it comes to grieving, Like,
eventually you gotta come out of that place so that
you can be productive in life because grief can condemn
or have you in the grave with them.

Speaker 1 (15:46):
So as me, and how do what things do you guys.

Speaker 2 (15:49):
Do to actually be to actually heal?

Speaker 1 (15:52):
Yeah, so that's my question, right.

Speaker 2 (15:54):
Because we have Now that's the thing. Now, that's the
thing that needs to be because men really don't. Men
really don't have the outlet to heal men like because
men have. Something happens, Something happens right the way the

(16:15):
way a lot of men deal with it. Me, I'm
gonna speak to me if I go through something or
something pisces me off, or I feel some type of way,
I'm gonna get my car, drive smoke, hit the highway,
and I'm gonna think, right, you know what I mean,
And then i'm gonna come back. I'm gonna come back home,

(16:40):
and then I'm gonna sit there. I may not, depending
on what it is, I may not even say anything
to you about it. You're gonna be able to tell
though that something's on my mind. But I'm gonna sit
there and figure it out on my own. First or
try to process it and deal with it on my own.
First off, feeven come to you and say anything about it.

(17:00):
It all.

Speaker 1 (17:03):
Got it.

Speaker 6 (17:04):
And then.

Speaker 2 (17:10):
If it becomes to the point where I can't, like
if all my avenues have been exhausted, then I may
come to you and say, look, this is what i'm
this is what's on my mind, this is what's stressing
me out, this is what happened. Whatever. But a man,
you don't last thing you want to do is put

(17:30):
that on your woman and have heard even though the
woman is like, we partners, I got this, I got
your back. You know That's what I'm here for. You
really don't. The first thing you want to do is
the first thing a man wants to do is I'm
going to work this out on my own first before

(17:51):
I even mention it to her anything, unless it's something
that can affect us both.

Speaker 1 (17:57):
But do you feel that you were conditioned to do
that incorrectly? And the reason that I asked that, right
is because you guys, and I know you two in particular,
you do expect for your women to actually come to
you to discuss something right if they are having a problem,

(18:18):
Because you guys are mister fix it right, y'all want
to fix it. Y'all want to be the ones that
you know, like save the day, and y'all do a
great job with this. So why do you not feel
that it should be done the other way around?

Speaker 2 (18:33):
I know for me it's a pride or ego thing. Okay,
because why because you as as as since young, you've
always been told, man, I.

Speaker 6 (18:51):
Don't really even think it's an ego or pride thing.
I think you kind of use the wrong word. What
it really is is conditioning though. What it is is
condition we are yeah, is that too? We're taught to
provide and be that extra backbone, you know what I'm
saying for our woman.

Speaker 2 (19:08):
But pride and ego also plays a part in that
as way, because you don't want because you don't want
to always you know what? You don't want it? Yeah,
you know what I mean. So so with that is you,
since young, you've always been told the man up, figure
it out, don't cry, don't complain like right, So who

(19:28):
wants to be there? Put your head up? Like who? Like?
You know what I mean. So that's that's where that
comes into playoffs. So even even now at forty seven,
it's certain things that that I won't let me see.
How can I say? It's it's certain things that I
think back on, and I know, like cause we've had conversations.

(19:51):
You be like, no, that's an excuse, it's not an excuse.
But when certain things happen, it's certain things that can
take you back to a certain place in your childhood
or that makes you that makes you feel like, Okay, damn,
I used to get scolded for this, or I used

(20:14):
to get reprimanded or you know what I mean, Like
it was looked down upon for doing feeling or saying whatever.
You know what I mean. So and that would make
that would make a person just like basically nut up
and just like not say anything at all. Now see.

Speaker 6 (20:35):
Yeah, okay, look from from from my Lovely Viewer, Miss
roy Ring is on here.

Speaker 5 (20:41):
She said, it's unfir though, for me to turn around
and say they don't have a safe place when they're
keeping when they're keeping it from the person that they
know has their back.

Speaker 1 (20:53):
So I was actually going to I was waiting on
him to finish because both of you guys said earlier
that you don't have a because men don't have an avenue.
So what I wanted to do is challenge y'all, because
when you say you don't have an avenue, you do,
but you are you're not conditioned to use that avenue
or you don't necessarily maybe feel as comfortable or vulnerable

(21:14):
doing it.

Speaker 2 (21:15):
It's not when I have it. No, No, when I
said that, I wasn't saying it in the space of
I don't have anyone to talk to, or my woman
doesn't have my back and she's not there for me.
That's not what I'm saying. I'm just speaking in general.
A lot of men do not have that out man and.

Speaker 6 (21:31):
Then got it, and then not even so much that
we don't want to use y'all as use y'all as
an avenue. We know y'all, we know y'all are earth,
but we still have Like you said, it kind of
goes back to what he was saying about pride, because
we still are also worried about being judged by how
you feel about what we feel it.

Speaker 2 (21:51):
Okay, So there's been there's been a lot of instances
where a woman and I've seen this happen that hasn't
happened to me, but I've seen where the man has
been vulnerable and open to his chick and the first
time they get into it, or she yet she threw

(22:11):
it in his face. You know what I'm saying. So
that that alone would make you know, a situation like so,
that alone would make it just be like, I don't
even want to say nothing. I'll figure it out. I'll
get through it some kind of way. And if I can't,
then if all my avenues are exhausted, then I will come.

(22:34):
And it had been you to have done it.

Speaker 6 (22:37):
But just because someone else in our life has done it,
We're not even gonna entertain the thought of you playing
with us like that again, you know what I'm saying. So,
like a lot of stuff that men do come from
trauma or past hurt or rejection in their life. And
again we all know that naturally and don't like rejection.

(23:01):
So rather than even have to go through that, we're
just not gonna do it. So I'm just not gonna
bring me let me, let me let me tell you something.

Speaker 2 (23:08):
Right, we can we can have a disagreement or argument
or whatever about something in the house, right, and me,
I don't like to uh, what's what's the word, I
guess stir the pod or agitate a situation, right, So

(23:33):
I would rather wait until and gauge her temperament and
her temperature to see if she's okay. You know what
I mean? Yeah, because I know with me, I processed
what went wrong. I get okay, this is what I
did wrong. I hear what she's saying. All right, cool, Okay,

(23:55):
maybe I shouldn't have said that that that didn't come
off right. All right, cool, I'm over it now, but
she not, so I have to wait on her to
be okay right before icking even And then you don't men,
I don't care. I don't care what you say. I

(24:15):
don't care what I don't care what you say.

Speaker 7 (24:17):
Every man is like I wannap, but listen, you know
what's crazy because what I've learned with that is as
crazy as it's sound, bro, because I know exactly what
you're talking about.

Speaker 6 (24:28):
And I'm pretty sure every man who has a woman
who is tentative to that woman knows exactly what you're
talking about.

Speaker 2 (24:35):
Right. So, Like the thing about that is is that
they really be waiting on you to say something.

Speaker 1 (24:41):
I was just gonna say that, like what's so crazy?

Speaker 6 (24:44):
The cat's twenty two in it? Because and that you're
waiting and for her to chill out. But she waited
for you to say something to make her chill out.
So it's the catch twenty two of the whole situation.

Speaker 2 (24:55):
So it's like, ah, do I say something? Eyes see, like, nigga,
you better say something.

Speaker 1 (25:00):
So like that's because that's where that reassurance comes from. Right,
So kind of what you said is you expect for
your women to come to you when something's wrong you.
You want to be that person that they lean on.
But they're waiting on you to be that post right there,
and you're not. You're not there right, So then all
it does is build up more anguish, more angry.

Speaker 6 (25:21):
Now now that reassurance word. Listen, I'm gonna tell you.
I'm gonna give y' all the hint ladies for something.
And all ladies might not do this, but I noticed
that women tend to do this from time to time.

Speaker 2 (25:35):
When y'all that's old boyfriend, Yeah, that's what you call it.
So this must be his phone? Is this your phone?
I'll call Dave and give it to day. He must
have picked up your phone, and you picked up his phone.
I'll call Dave and give it to him. All right,

(26:01):
All right, Yeah, go ahead. And when y're women need
to learn how to.

Speaker 6 (26:12):
Accept reassuring sometimes even though it may not come how
y'all wanted or expected it to come. Because again, we men,
so we don't always know how to verbalize certain things.

Speaker 2 (26:29):
I'm gonna tell you, Hey, listen, I'm gonna tell you
not I be my heart being the right place my
mind be. But when it comes, but when it come out,
she'd be like, how the fuck dare you? I'd be like, wait, what,
That's not what I'm meant. I'd be like, Yo, that's
not what I meant. Wait, wait, that's not what I'm
saying to give.

Speaker 1 (26:47):
Okay, I'm gonna give you a really good example, right,
because on this show he stated that you know, when
you come on, you gotta be vulnerable, you gotta be honest.
I'm gonna give you I work from home, right, So
me working from home, naturally I absorb some of the
things that him and Marley may not necessarily get to absorb.

Speaker 2 (27:04):
Right.

Speaker 1 (27:05):
And what I mean by that is, if I'm sitting there,
there's dishes, I'm gonna do this. I'm the person that
cooks and clean and so forth, right, so I will
empty the dishwasher so that people can put their dirty
dishes in the dishwasher. Him and Marley will still go
in that kitchen and put it right in the sink.
All that does is leave it for me to do. Right.
So boom, story time. I'm sitting here in the kitchen.

(27:28):
I see these dishes in the sink, and I know
I cleaned out the dishwasher, right. Cool. Cool, go back
into the bedroom and I say, Babe, I'm gonna talk
to Marlee tomorrow, but I need to talk. I'm gonna
talk to you now. And I told him, you know,
this is what I need y'all to do, because then
I do it for a reason to keep the kitchen clean, right.

(27:48):
I don't want to be overwhelmed with cooking and a dirt.
You know, I gotta clean the kitchen then cook, right.
He asks, His question was what dishes did I leaving
the sink?

Speaker 2 (28:02):
Right?

Speaker 1 (28:02):
So immediately, it doesn't matter if you left the dish today, right,
you do it? So I continue because I knew if
I answered that question, I was gonna be the petty
woman and go in there and get the dish that
you left. Because you asked the question. I got this
dish that you left in there because you asked the
question cool.

Speaker 2 (28:22):
Cool?

Speaker 1 (28:24):
Instead, I continue my story right of you know, I
just need y'all to do this for me because I'm overwhelmed.
He said nothing when I say, he didn't say a
word after that. He just he was looking at TV
as though I was invisible. Hello, I literally said nothing. Okay,

(28:48):
wait a second, you and I are on the same page.

Speaker 2 (28:52):
Is exactly right, But let me tell you something. Right
in my defense, I'm remember I remember coming because I
was high as a Georgia pine for one. Right, Let's
let's start there. Let's let's start there. Let's start there.

(29:12):
Let's let's start there. Right. I was high as hell.
Right anyway, before she walked into the room, I had
dozed off a little bit. So when she opened the door,
that kind of popped my eyes back open. So when
she said what she said, I'm like, in my mind, yo, listen,
I swear on my kids. Man. I in my mind,

(29:34):
I thought I said, okay, I swear to God. Bro.
In my mind I thought I said. I thought, I
thought I said okay until she said, so, you're not
going to say nothing. So I'm like, what dishes did

(29:55):
I leave in the scene because because in my mind,
I just just warmed our food up on the paper
plates and we just ate and I just threw the
stuff away.

Speaker 1 (30:06):
For the record, I cooked some fire ass green beans,
and we don't like the juice to touch the other food.
So he used a glass bowl to put that in there. So,
if we have to be technical on what dish he
left in there, that's the dish.

Speaker 2 (30:19):
She right, however, but again I wasn't. I wasn't even
thinking about that, right, So so in my mind, you know,
I'm just like, I'm just like, okay, cool.

Speaker 1 (30:30):
But he didn't say it right, But he just sat there.

Speaker 2 (30:34):
You know what I'm saying. I take it. I take
it's my fault. I take it responsibility. But I didn't.
I didn't really realize it until the next day because
when I came home. Look, no, but when I come
home from break, she was like, you know, she expressed
how she felt about it.

Speaker 1 (30:52):
No, so let's rewind it, because if we're gonna tell
the story, we gotta tell it right. When that happened.
He then said, wait a minute, this is the audacity,
Miss Rodriguez, and my ladies out there will completely understand
what I mean. If there's you know, if we got
them watch it. I said, okay, nothing. He said, what

(31:15):
am I supposed to say? Quote unquote, you said, make
sure the dishes are done. I don't feel I had
to say anything after that. So that's what sent me
at that point, because how dare ye? Because men don't

(31:36):
like rejection, right y'all said that earlier. Men don't like rejection.
Men don't like to be ignored. That is the equivalent
of him texting me to say something and I leave
it on red and say nothing. But he looked me
in the exactly I was left on red in person.

Speaker 2 (32:00):
But I wasn't but I wasn't thinking him by I
wasn't even looking at it like that because you know,
we usually communicate, and you know we talked, you know,
So again that was my fault. I take that.

Speaker 1 (32:17):
Because then what happened because he is like the sweetest
person you will ever meet in your life. Y'all main know,
a different version of him, but the man is a
teddy bear when it comes to me. He comes into
the kitchen the next day as sweet as ever, and
he's doing exactly what I asked him to do, and
he apologizes for the dishes, but no, what he said was,

(32:41):
I didn't mean to make you mad, right, I'm sorry
about the dishes, and it sent me and I'm gonna
tell you why, because I wasn't mad about the dishes.
I was just asking him to do something and telling
him how I felt. Never did I come in their
hostile Never did I come up in their upset piss
me off. After that is him saying what he said

(33:04):
last night and ignoring and dismissing what I said. So
then at the kitchen table when he said that, I
know I should have said it's okay, but you know
what I said, I never did you think I was
mad about the dishes. That's not what I was mad about.
He then said nothing again. He never said, well, what
were you mad about?

Speaker 2 (33:25):
Right?

Speaker 1 (33:26):
He never said anything. So I instantly felt ignored again,
as though we were conversing, and then you just shut
up again, and I was like, you know, you know, goddamn,
what well I talk about this?

Speaker 2 (33:38):
You know, men, he was trying to process it. You
had to give.

Speaker 6 (33:41):
He had to give because of town the process, and
he was trying to process it again. He be highs
a Georgia pieties. His synapsis don't be fired on as fast.

Speaker 1 (33:49):
As I like how you'd be having his back. But
when it all boils down, it's learning how to communicate, right,
So that's what it boils down.

Speaker 2 (33:56):
And again that's and to be completely honest, like I've
learned a lot of ship over the course of this
four years and in our relationship.

Speaker 6 (34:10):
And what she said, you canna let us know what
you're hey because ms, my motherfucker orig is be showing out.
She's talking them right, because if you're talking to me
and I don't answer you, I have to go play
with my grady teeth exactly.

Speaker 1 (34:26):
No, seriously, they and you know what makes it even
worse is a woman is going to say something, right,
So Asia is gonna say something to you. You're never
and that's what we as women need to because y'all
ain't gonna say nothing. We're gonna say something. You feel
this way.

Speaker 2 (34:42):
I'm different, He won't.

Speaker 1 (34:43):
I'll be saying, yeah, you say something, he and like.

Speaker 6 (34:47):
Because I feel as as a as a fellow dishwasher
and kitchen keep cleaner.

Speaker 2 (34:54):
Yeah, you need to get that together.

Speaker 6 (34:57):
I'm just saying I feel it because I'll be coming
in here and i'd be like, hey, why these dishes?
And see, so I mean, I'm just saying I kind
of feel it, like I'm sorry, but you're right too, because.

Speaker 1 (35:06):
Like you just didn't what I was gonna say. What
part was he right on?

Speaker 2 (35:09):
Because he just he didn't really see what the problem was.

Speaker 6 (35:12):
He just didn't really understand what you was mad about,
because in his mind, the dishes was cleaned, and he like,
what's wrong? And again you called him half sleep did
he didn't even process what was going on originally, So
he's just trying to figure it out. You just can't
put all that on my cousin.

Speaker 1 (35:28):
Like I like, got his back to listen. I like
that you always ten toes down with him, right, I sweaty, right,
like you ten toes down as you should be. You know,
I get that. But then at that point it's a
part of learning effective communication.

Speaker 2 (35:48):
Right wrong?

Speaker 1 (35:49):
Okay, I like that he right, but he wrong. We're
gonna we're gonna take that.

Speaker 2 (35:53):
We're gonna wrong.

Speaker 6 (35:54):
But I see why he went and why he went wrong,
and he at least he had to try to fix it,
because most niggas don't give a fuck.

Speaker 2 (36:03):
He just would have went on about his very fucking day.

Speaker 6 (36:06):
So you know again you always gotta give your shout
out to a nigga that's trying, cause niggas don't try.

Speaker 1 (36:12):
Don't agree that, but that is true. I have friends
right that say it all the time.

Speaker 6 (36:20):
He'll let you eight fellas stop just letting you stop
this ship because you be the first one mad and
all in your chest when she go find a nigga
that's trying.

Speaker 2 (36:31):
Now you crying because you wasn't trying, and that nigga
just show a little.

Speaker 6 (36:36):
Bit of effort. It's all to be taken to just
a little bit of effort. Oh God, the nigga just
just do it. Take a little bit of effort. It's
all it takes, is just a little bit of effort.
And now you decide, nigga, and you used to be
the main nigga.

Speaker 2 (36:50):
You ain't even know. You became in side niggas.

Speaker 1 (36:53):
I disagree, but maybe that's for another show. That could
be for another show.

Speaker 2 (37:00):
You ain't got a lot of me that exactly anyway,
Move right along, all right. My next question, what does
masculinity mean to you? And has that definition changed over time? Yes,
the definition of it for me has definitely changed.

Speaker 6 (37:19):
Masculinity what it means for me now is okay, let
me start off with what I grew up with it as.

Speaker 2 (37:27):
Growing up with it as it was the typical how
many bit as you how many you don't give how many? Yeah,
you know what I'm saying, like how much money you made?
To the point toward something.

Speaker 6 (37:39):
Something happened to me that I didn't realize this shouldn't
have happened to me until I was a grown man.

Speaker 2 (37:48):
You know, whoa nothing no, whoa whoa wo. We ain't
talking about no Kanye ship, all right, right, no Kanye,
no Kanye.

Speaker 6 (37:56):
No Diddy, all right. But it was women, you know
what I'm saying. So like, again, I grew up from
a culture of women make the man type shit, you
know what I'm saying. So like my daddy was a player,
My uncles was playing. My uncle got like twenty some kids.

(38:17):
You know what I'm saying, So like good yeah, so
like it was almost like the most kids you had
that was your swag type shit, you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 2 (38:26):
So like I come from it, so like.

Speaker 6 (38:30):
When I had a threesomeit well shit, it wasn't even
really like they're an orgy and these grown these these
were grown women. But I was like thirteen fourteen, I
didn't realize that is rape exactly. You see what I'm saying.
But in our culture I turned up, you know what
I'm saying right now.

Speaker 1 (38:49):
It was like a flat rather than taking a look
back and saying, okay, I was just molested exactly force.

Speaker 6 (38:57):
But you know, so like as of now though, and
having a son and having a daughter like masculinity. Masculinity
for me is like just truly being able to take
care of what's important to you and understanding that.

Speaker 2 (39:19):
You gotta understand others as well, you know what I'm saying.
So like a lot growing up for me as a man,
A lot of it was.

Speaker 6 (39:29):
It was a lot of my way of the highway
type of thing, especially when you the one, when you
the breadwinner. So I was always taught to be the
bread winner. My granddaddy, my grandma mayn't wan't for shit,
you know what I'm saying. So like, but he was
a whore, you real You know what I'm saying. Man,
You know what I'm saying. If you if if you

(39:50):
rock with with with my uncle, that I mean you
you see what it was. But you know you was
good you we need for shit. So like I come
from a family of provide us, but we also might
not have been the best boyfriend or men. You know
what I'm saying, both boyfriend or husbands. You know what
I'm saying. We good men, but we may not be
the best husbands or boyfriends, you know what I'm saying.

(40:10):
So I really have to give a shout out to
my bigger brother, Kenny Madge Junior, for showing me something
different on that aspect. You know what I'm saying, because
I've been married before and I necessarily I'm not married to.

Speaker 2 (40:27):
That person no more. You see what I'm saying.

Speaker 6 (40:29):
So like whereas he got married and they've been together
for twenty them in thirty some years, you know what
I'm saying, and they they prospered, you know what I'm saying.
So he showed you a different dynamic, got it versus
what you usually see is motherfuckers get married, they break up.
They motherfuckers see motherfucks be married together and chee over here.

Speaker 2 (40:47):
Alls ain't got a whole nother lives, like you know
what I'm.

Speaker 6 (40:50):
Saying, Like, my girl, my people mother fucky had whole
other lives. You know, you know what I'm saying. I
grew up around watching motherfuckers have double lives and shit
like that. So like for me now, it is being
completely monogamous because everybody know me is you know what
I'm saying, me, you and your girl.

Speaker 2 (41:08):
You know what I'm saying. So like.

Speaker 6 (41:11):
I was missed the threesome extraordin'red Like if it wasn't me,
you and your girlfriend, you might as well just keep
your pussy to yourself because that's boring type shit. So
like for me now again, because I got a daughter,
you know, it bes.

Speaker 1 (41:30):
Different, Like ah, kind of take a step back when
I want.

Speaker 2 (41:36):
A nigga, but like that's when she choose. That's when
she choose.

Speaker 6 (41:40):
But you know, it just makes you look at it different,
and then it also makes you look at you different
because I got a son, So it's like what type
of man do I want my son to be? And
my taking our sons love us the fucking death. So
everything we fucking do.

Speaker 1 (41:54):
They they do it, y'all, little Shadow, No matter what the.

Speaker 2 (41:57):
Fuck we do, it's the bees fucking knees.

Speaker 6 (41:59):
We could walk outside street the world fucking the face
right now, and my daddy's he deserved that came by
fucking with my daddy type shit. So like, yeah, it's
a whole different thing. Like I had I know who
my daddy is, but he wasn't in my life, Okay.
So like I often ask other people a lot of

(42:22):
times myself, like is it worse to know your daddy
and know he ain't shit versus just not knowing that
they canplete at all?

Speaker 2 (42:31):
It's just you know what I'm saying, which one is
really worse?

Speaker 6 (42:35):
So like, uh, you know, because when you know he
ain't theren you know he had dirt, you really ain't
got no ad, nothing to look forward to.

Speaker 2 (42:44):
You ain't got no you don't know what I'm saying, nothing,
no expectations.

Speaker 1 (42:48):
Yeah, but I think those type of people struggle with
a different void, right of like abandonment, and you know
it's so forth because and I think it's just a
natural thing, right. So, my I had a mom, my
step mom, But I am Korean, an African American right Soul,
South Korea, born in Soul, South Korea. I don't know

(43:12):
my biological mom, right, but I had a mom that
was absolutely amazing, the funniest person you ever met in
your life. But it was still that void right of like, eah,
but this lady just bought this little Asian baby out
and just leave it and go. So they kind of
struggled with a different Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 6 (43:32):
Because I know, dude, call it right now. He just
ain't never done that shit for real, you know what
I'm saying. So like he maybe came, he picked me
up a couple of so and so when we are
in real life, they really ain't shit so like, but
I applaud them for trying. Again, you got to give
a niggas roses for trying. He tried, and like I said,

(43:52):
you know what I'm saying. He might not have been
the best father, but you know what I'm saying, he was.
He was an upstanding niggas somebody what I'm saying, right.

Speaker 2 (44:02):
Cool. Well, for me, it's kind of similar to what
not not you know, it's kind of similar to what
you said, but not you know, and listen, man, that
my life story ain't similar to nobody. But masculinity to
me when I was coming up was always getting the

(44:31):
most money, driving the flyers car, having the baddest or
the most women. It was never taught to me that

(44:51):
taking care of a family, providing protecting. None of that
stuff was taught to me to be masculine. None of that.

Speaker 1 (45:08):
Got it.

Speaker 2 (45:11):
Everybody that I looked up to that I thought was
the man. It was just they was in the streets.

Speaker 1 (45:22):
So they were the ones that you guys saw making
the money, getting all the women driving.

Speaker 2 (45:27):
That's that's the man. That's the man. No real stability,
because to be honest, and there was there was the
man that woke up every morning and got up and
got in his van or his truck and with the word.
But you didn't even you didn't even see him because
by the time you got up, he was already gone

(45:48):
to work. And while you out doing what you're doing,
he didn't drove down the block, got out his truck
and went in the house. You don't even see him.
So we had no example of that pretty much that
role model. Yeah, but the role models that we saw

(46:10):
was what was put in front of us. The dudes
that's coming down with the with the chains on, and
the New Thams and the Jordans and the you know,
back then, everybody's wearing baggy clothes, so you know you
had on the boss, you know what I mean. So
in New York, it was it was leathers and fatigues
and thames and you know, so when you when as

(46:31):
you growing up and you see that. But I had
an example of what a man was supposed to be
in my house until that man started getting high. And
you know what I'm saying. So it was like, you

(46:53):
know what I mean. I had a father and mother
in the same household, and my father was doing the
things that a father was supposed I didn't recognize it
because I was young. All I know is I got games,
I got clothes. You know, we eat, we got a car,
a house to heat work. You know, you're not really
paying attention to all that at you know, as an adolescent,

(47:17):
you're not paying attention to none of that, right, But
as you get older than you forced to see like damn,
I gotta figure some shit out. Then it's like the
man that you looked up to, he broke all that
for you. So the only thing that you have to
see and at those ages of thirteen, fourteen and fifteen,

(47:40):
you're very, very impressionable because me, I didn't have anybody
to talk to or look to or look up to
or really talk about what I felt was needed, right,
and a big brother or a father figure or whatever.
So by the time I did start latching, the people
in the neighborhood.

Speaker 1 (48:00):
Probably weren't latching to the right people either.

Speaker 2 (48:02):
That's what I'm saying. So the people going to in
the neighborhood, those guys were the ones that was drug dealers.
They was killing it and they was you know.

Speaker 6 (48:11):
Even know it's crazy, like for me, the first memory
of my daddy that I got straight up. And it's
crazy because I didn't even meet this man until this day, right,
and I was like thirteen fourteen.

Speaker 2 (48:23):
We went to a summer uh a summer camp trip
with the church to raising rivers.

Speaker 6 (48:33):
Me and one of the other uh other kids that
was there got the same name, but his last name
spelled with a es boom.

Speaker 2 (48:45):
He ended up drowning with us out there. He drowned.
Oh no, they thought it was me. He came up there.
That's how I meet this man because he thought I drowned.

Speaker 1 (48:58):
Oh wow, that is deep. So it's not the element
of let me meet my son to write, introduce myself,
make it right. It was that he's gone right probably
now I got that guilt.

Speaker 2 (49:15):
Wow, Ah, it's deep. He ain't never told me that
one Couzo.

Speaker 1 (49:22):
Man, Well, thank you for being vulnerable to share that, right,
because that's a lot. And I think what's interesting is
both of you. So I read an article a while back, right,
and women were trying to rip the writer of this
article up, but I got what he was saying, and
it just kind of hit home on what you guys said.
It said that men are the ones women don't necessarily

(49:46):
always need role models or things to mold them, because women,
when they see things a lot of times, they can
they almost emulate immediately if it's right or wrong, right,
or if it's going to be okay. Both of y'all
are basically saying the same things, right, that your masculinity
at a point of time was really driven by people

(50:06):
that y'all saw, right, only even though you probably knew
the selling drugs wasn't the right avenue to go or
that it could do something, but the choices that you had,
you still chose to do certain things because you saw
other people do it.

Speaker 2 (50:22):
Right.

Speaker 1 (50:25):
So that article really talked about how men are not
paid attention to enough for those type of things role
models immediately, and that how some of these psychology books
weren't necessarily written for men, that they were written for women, right,
they were written for women's trauma. It was written for

(50:45):
women right to get over trauma, and that within the
last generation, that's when people have started paying attention more
to men's mental health. But at the end of his article,
he said, the question is is it too late? And
I was like, damn right, Like that was deep because
then you'll see people that are still struggling with the

(51:07):
same things.

Speaker 2 (51:08):
That because at some point it becomes a genetic thing,
like after.

Speaker 6 (51:17):
From the scientific standpoint of it, after you've been trained
for some for so long, and then your next you
train your next generation, and then you train the next
generation the same thing after and over and over and over.
It becomes embedded into your DNA, sort of like with anything,
like you know, you're supposed to walk at a certain age,

(51:38):
you know what I'm saying, certain things, so like it's
kind of it would be kind of hard to rear.
You would literally be rewiring mankind because that's we've been
taught that those things are almost plinabal for us like that,

(52:00):
and technically it is kind of came man this, which
is how most women.

Speaker 2 (52:05):
Depicted, you know what I'm saying, So like man, that's it.
We hardwired for certain ship.

Speaker 6 (52:16):
So that's why it would be kind of a difficult,
a difficult task because genetically we just pre position pre wired.

Speaker 2 (52:25):
To just do certain ship.

Speaker 1 (52:29):
But at the same time, you said, I learned that
because that's what I saw. So that means that that perception, right,
can change if you're at the right reality piece.

Speaker 6 (52:38):
Yeah, that's just like because they're just like president's president
is taught. Nobody's born presidents that's taught.

Speaker 1 (52:45):
So what y'all are saying is like that was just
y'all did it because that's what y'all saw. I don't
have a female friend to this day, and I know
a lot of people because a lot of people will
always flock to me. I don't have a female friend.
That's not the opposite of that. So the things that
they went through when they were children, they they try
to focus on making sure that it right, Like they

(53:07):
didn't emulate that as kids, right, or they didn't emulate
that as teenagers or and it's often a conversation right
in the woman community of my mom used to do that.
I would never write or I'm not gonna do that
to my kids because this is how I felt.

Speaker 2 (53:24):
Now, see that's with me. I don't think. I don't
think it with me. It was I did it because
it's what I saw. I did it because it was
it was like survival for me to do the things I.

Speaker 1 (53:40):
Did, so kind of bringing that environment piece into it
right of Like.

Speaker 2 (53:45):
So it's like, you know, now, I went out and
got summer jobs, worked at camps whole nine. It wasn't nothing.
It didn't substantiate anything as far as financially, as far

(54:07):
as what I was trying to do to help at home.
Got it because my father wasn't there. So once once,
the people that I looked up to in the neighborhood
that I thought were the masculine dudes, the men that
was really you know being you know, yeah, I started

(54:33):
they started really coming to me because how I was
with my sister, how I used to protect Shari and
fight over her. So they latched onto me because of that.
And then it's like what you do, nohing, I go
to school, I play ball. Hey, hein't miss Tracy your mom.

(54:54):
Now I'm wondering how these dudes know who my mom is?
You know what I mean? Because they don't serve my mama.
That's how they know who my mom is.

Speaker 1 (55:06):
Mm hmm.

Speaker 2 (55:08):
So it's like, all right, look, we like your mom,
like you, we know your situation. We see you up
here with the ball, playing ball, going to school. Let
us show you how to We'll help your mom. Yeah,

(55:28):
where your pop at.

Speaker 1 (55:30):
Manipulation and predators.

Speaker 2 (55:32):
That's what it is, exactly something else but but but
but but at the same time, I didn't look at
I can see that now, But then it was and
I felt that it was because Okay, they used me

(55:52):
to help them, but they helped me at the same
and you know what I'm saying, the same token because
now it started out out with them just my man quick,
God bless today he would give my mom money. Hey,
your son, we got him. We're gonna look out for him.
Don't you don't have to pay for nothing, don't worry
about nothing else. If you need something, just come holler

(56:13):
at us. But stay in the house, don't be outside.
No more bills need to be paid here. Take that
down to your mom. Make sure this get done. And
they wasn't using my house as a trap spot, none of.

Speaker 1 (56:27):
That, right, But like you said, there's still a part
of that manipulation.

Speaker 2 (56:32):
Exactly I'm taking it as real genuine. These dudes really
care for me, they really fuck with me, they're really
looking out for me. No, but daddy ain't doing it.
My daddy ain't doing it. And they ain't even my mama,
you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 (56:51):
So it came off genuine, It came off to help you,
and then it's like and then you're still a kid
at that point too, right, So I always try to
remind people like, you know, y'all, y'all grew up a
certain way, but y'all were still children. So there are
still just things as a child that you don't necessarily recognize.

Speaker 2 (57:08):
Now, I'm thirteen with a half of brick, fourteen with
a half of brick, coming back from New York on
a Peter Pan bus, making that yaou like, yeah, all
people on the East Coast, y'all know what that peter
Pan bus is. Y'all know what. That bus goes straight
from Delaware to New York to Philly wherever, and you
come right on back.

Speaker 1 (57:27):
Okay, why do they call it a peter Pan bus?

Speaker 2 (57:30):
That was the name of the bus.

Speaker 1 (57:31):
Oh, that was the name of the actual bus coming.

Speaker 2 (57:33):
Yeah, Peter Pan.

Speaker 1 (57:34):
I'm like is there like a metaphor? Okay, got it?

Speaker 2 (57:37):
Yeah, so yeah, I'm thirteen fourteen with a half of
brick strapped around my waist under my all powder like bombs.
Tape is taped around. I swear it out. It's taped
around my waist under my arms the whole night. Yeah,
they was using me. I was a mule, you know
what I mean? Like I was a mule, you know

(57:59):
what to show you.

Speaker 1 (58:00):
That predators come into different forms. When we were kids,
we were taught that predators were people that took kids
right and molested them and sold them. And no, predators
came in all different type of forms. Y'all just had
different predators.

Speaker 2 (58:14):
But we're not looking at it that way. Just like, man,
I'm getting this money, I'm able to go buy shoes.
I can find my little brother and sister. I can
go feed my little brother sister. I can make sure
mama got some money. I can make sure the bills
is straight. I'm pulling up and shit, my teachers ain't driving.
Life was great. I learned it and I took off.

(58:35):
But that's what I thought being a man was. Even
as I got older, as a grown ass man, I
still thought that that was what being a man was.
It wasn't until recently, within like the last maybe maybe
ten years that I realized, like, yo, you still living

(58:59):
like a little boy. You're not being a man for real.

Speaker 1 (59:04):
Yeah, And that's vulnerable to say, right, because I think
it happens for a lot of different people, but you're
saying it really happen later for you. Yeah, got it
because you got a lot of you, because your babies
are so small, you've got a lot of you.

Speaker 2 (59:17):
Got a lot of grown ass men right now that
swear to God they the man. I'm a man, I'm
living on man's terms. I'm not. But you really you're like, nah,
you're not, You're not right? Because what.

Speaker 1 (59:30):
So I think the women that are tuned into this, right,
I think it's kind of dope that they are saying
this and kind of being as vulnerable because I know
we've all had conversations as women, right, whether it's the
group chat or you know, like you in your little
girl huddle of he's not doing this or he doesn't
understand this right, or he's not he's not being the

(59:54):
man that I need him to be. And sometimes it
ain't necessarily that they're not. They don't recognize it and
know how until like a pivotal pivotal woman.

Speaker 2 (01:00:04):
Comes and men can see their woman's group chat thread
with their chick have y'all, ever, it will humble the
ship out of you and make you change your ways.
I'm telling you.

Speaker 1 (01:00:17):
So, I have never seen a man's group chat or
I've never it's nothing.

Speaker 2 (01:00:22):
It's nothing, And if we do, it's nothing like y'all. Yeah,
it's nothing like y'all. If a man start, if a
man has a group chat, it's going to be like
we're going up to the game. For us, it's like, yo,
who gonna all be at the studio or something? Or
it's nothing about let me tell you what this motherfucker

(01:00:43):
it ain't nothing like.

Speaker 1 (01:00:45):
I always tell like you never.

Speaker 5 (01:00:49):
Did to me.

Speaker 2 (01:00:50):
It's none of that. We never do that.

Speaker 1 (01:00:53):
Like literally the other day, I'm not joking, right because
if the viewers don't know, my take is part Mexican.
When he pissed me off the other day, I literally
told my best friend, I'm having him deported, Like that's
what my my chat started off with, I'm having his
ass deported. She's like, why are we having him deported?

(01:01:16):
And when I told her she said, yeah, we get
him deported, right, totally diabolical, right, So I get what
y'all saying, like, I've never picked up a man's phone
and saw like a group chat like women have. That's
why I always say when I die, factory reset my phone.
It's not because they're.

Speaker 6 (01:01:38):
Consists of one nigga me and one is probably him
and one nigga, or even if they are having deep conversations,
it's just him and one other nigga in that group chat.
So you just gotta figure out I wis one of
his friends he actually fucked with in real life to have.

Speaker 2 (01:01:55):
There's only two instances that I have group chat and
then niggas don't do that shit. I've never said I
never start to love. I never start the group chat.
Zeus always starts the group chat. Oh my god, Zeus
always because it's always and it's only consisting of everybody

(01:02:15):
meet up here at this time or everybody going in
for this show we're taking off at this time. Da
da da. That's the only time we have a group chat.
And then the second time is for work man.

Speaker 1 (01:02:25):
When I tell you the moment that I said, I
don't think women handle group chats very well. And I'm
gonna tell you why. He showed me a text message right,
Actually he posted it online a long time ago, like
years ago, and you know how you post something, but
you can see what someone typed before that too. It

(01:02:46):
was like the second or third day and these men
in this chat, I don't know who I was a
part of it, but I know I saw Zeus's name.
They just going back with motivational shit. They're like, Bro,
today's gonna be a this Today's going to be And
that was a pivotal moment in my life because I said, KB,
you not living life right because that's not how your

(01:03:07):
group chats look. Your group chats. I was like, damn.
I was like, it's this man's group chat because it
was so positive and so like, this is what we're doing,
we elevating ourselves. And my group chat started the other day.

Speaker 6 (01:03:22):
I'm talking about motivation and ship or tomorrow some getting
We're not talking about getting no money or motivating the
nigga to get some more money or make a move
that he probably been stalling on, or just letting them
know that what he is doing is on you know
what I'm saying, And were proud of him talking about no.

Speaker 1 (01:03:39):
But but I will tell you though, that that was
a learning lesson for me. Right of are you using
those so shout out to visions Hairtique owned by Katrina Moore.
I am in a group chat with her right and
her best friend and her sister in law, and we
are really, really, really close. Right, that's when I start

(01:04:02):
experiencing those type of group chats of like all you
see is the motivational stuff, and like, that's that's what
I told him that. This was years ago that I
saw that message that him and Zeus had posted and
they were really just elevating each other. And I was like, oh,
that ain't how my group chats in the past. But
I mean I was in college too, right.

Speaker 2 (01:04:21):
So she has a different set of friends. Yeah, so
she she has like three or four different.

Speaker 1 (01:04:31):
Group chat Yeah, so like my college group chat is wild. Yeah,
Like I could probably get paid from that chat. No, seriously,
I can't wait to tell some of the stories I'm
out in all you bitches. I just won't use the names.

Speaker 2 (01:04:54):
Yeah, but no, that's dope, though, I agree.

Speaker 6 (01:04:59):
Yeah, I do have I I I I do for
taking a very motivational group check. Now take about it
my uther PR management shout out to uh black widow
PR management team.

Speaker 2 (01:05:12):
Uh yeah, that's my we we we we we don't
do no hating it nothing. Who is that? Never hurt
of and get the fuck out of here?

Speaker 6 (01:05:25):
Check out time and touched out to check U check
the New York Times Weekly, Dad.

Speaker 2 (01:05:32):
Me that shit? They yall don't nobody be magazine?

Speaker 1 (01:05:34):
So does that motivate y'all when y'all see it, like
like when you wake up in the morning you see
that type of stuff, Like is that what kind of
motivates y'all to what? What motivates you to wanna do better?

Speaker 2 (01:05:45):
Seeing other niggas doing just as good or better? Pose?

Speaker 6 (01:05:50):
You can't really, hm, you can't really, You can't really
advance yourself around the same type of motherfuckers is doing
just just staggling in the same place, Like y'all can
be doing the same things, but you gotta be around
people who are successful in doing that so that you
learn how to be successful in doing it as well,

(01:06:12):
because you can't be around the motherfucking in the same
spot with you for too long because ship y'all bost
just sitting here on the.

Speaker 2 (01:06:20):
I can be I can be around somebody that's in
the same spoty. I mean, like, you know what I'm saying,
But we have to be willing to learn together and push.
But that's different. That's the thing that's different. That's different
for what I'm saying.

Speaker 6 (01:06:31):
What I'm saying is those that stay stagnant and happy
being stagnant become complacent.

Speaker 2 (01:06:38):
Yeah I'm worthy yet you see what I'm saying.

Speaker 6 (01:06:40):
Yeah, Like, and me and my woman had this problem
all the time because like she she she'd be comfortable
with certain shit and I'd be like, nah.

Speaker 2 (01:06:52):
Not you.

Speaker 6 (01:06:53):
We still got some more ships to do, Like nah, nah.
You know what I'm saying, Like, I know it looked
like I know it looked good. I know we comfortable
with what.

Speaker 2 (01:07:03):
Nah we need see me. I'm starting to step out
of my I'm trying, not trying. I'm starting to step
I'm starting to step out of my fear of failing
because she pushes me and tells me all the time, like, no,
you're gonna be great if you do this. You're gonna
be great if you do that, just get to it. Started.

(01:07:24):
So I'm starting I'm starting to I have no problem. Started.

Speaker 1 (01:07:28):
I told him last year, quit your job. He looked
at me like, er right, like, quit your job? Because
what other what other apparel company out there? Right that
you know? Do socks like he does to match sneakers? Right?
To make what other ones have you seen that look
as good as he is? The quality of it alone, right,

(01:07:50):
because women shop cheap? Men like what quality?

Speaker 2 (01:07:54):
Right?

Speaker 1 (01:07:54):
The quality of it alone, the concept alone of just
that we'll get him there?

Speaker 2 (01:08:01):
Right?

Speaker 1 (01:08:02):
So how do you not believe in yourself that because
you got you got the idea. Sometimes people don't have
the idea, right, but you have that enough? I tell him, Wow,
I go put your job right? Because is that because
we as people we crutch on things? Right? So are
you not taking this as seriously as you should because
you have this job as a crutch, right when you

(01:08:23):
can make just as much money from this, if not more,
because of social media, because of the platforms that y'all have.

Speaker 2 (01:08:33):
I'm gonna tell you where you could well, I mean
me personally, because you.

Speaker 1 (01:08:36):
Know what I'm saying, tell them to quit, y'all.

Speaker 6 (01:08:39):
I can't tell brother quick, but what I can tell
him is this, mart get you're towards people who already
designed shoes, bro.

Speaker 2 (01:08:51):
And get them to desire to word what's the shoes
that they make is included.

Speaker 1 (01:08:59):
With you with Yeah, he knows that, right, He's come
up with all these amazing.

Speaker 2 (01:09:06):
In itself, you know what I'm saying, So like it's
I'm gonna put yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:09:15):
But what he said was is kind of that fear
of failure, right, So how do you jump out of it?
When other people.

Speaker 6 (01:09:22):
Start a successful business without feeling some word down the
line anyway, every there's not one successful business who didn't
feel at some point.

Speaker 2 (01:09:30):
And the reason now I know that what I said
what I said, and I know other women it is
to not do it or to do it and quick.
That is the only failure.

Speaker 1 (01:09:42):
And that don't get me wrong, right because I know
other women may not necessarily tell their men to like, hey,
quit your job, right, But if you know his character,
what you know is he's a person that's gonna make
it happen right in any which way. So if he
quit that job tomorrow right and started this bus, I
guarantee if this electric bill needs to be paid, I'm

(01:10:04):
gonna see him selling something to somebody some way, somehow, right.
But that fear of failure is kind of what keeps
people there.

Speaker 2 (01:10:15):
To quit his job to do he can, I mean,
agin him itself.

Speaker 1 (01:10:22):
He has to be able to focus on those type
of things, right, So you gotta know your person. Me,
I know how to do everything, sublimation, everything, t shirts.
I'll never quit my job. You know why because what
I do for my job, I'm fucking good at it.
That's what God invented me to do. Right, analyzed processes, procedures, develop, coach, train,

(01:10:42):
talk to people right, get them to be the best
of their ability. Me quitting my job wouldn't make sense
because that's what I'm good at, right, That's what that's
my passion. I love to see people get promoted, right,
like I get so amped on that type of stuff.
But for him, right, he's building a skill that he
didn't have before that now he can quit his job.

(01:11:04):
I want to tell you, he's mister fix it. He
fixes everything. Anything that looks broke, he's gonna fix it.
He is going he can put ours together. Right. So now,
if you've learned this new skill, quit that shit and
do what you're good at. And that's what I encourage
men to do. Do what they are good at. Do
what y'all were like that y'all are passionate about y'all

(01:11:24):
put y'all passions aside, to take her kids, to take
her households, to take her a families. Y'all seen women
go into the era of like ooh, I'm starting over.
I don't see men do that. Y'all deserve to do
that my respective anyway.

Speaker 2 (01:11:40):
Okay, well, I agree with you, though, I'm gonna get
it going.

Speaker 1 (01:11:44):
Didn't make it, you know what I'm saying, Make the chance?

Speaker 2 (01:11:49):
All right, that's our time, y'all. It's eight o three.
We gotta get up out of here one time before
we go. Cousin maids, tell the people where they can
find you. What you got going on? Tell mother fucking
maids again. It's easy. It's easier to google me.

Speaker 6 (01:12:03):
Motherfucking music, motherfucking entertainment, motherfucking uh footwork. Actually as well,
look for me in the next movie Trigger Happy STL.
It's a couple of other movies I can't speak on.
Then you've also looked forward to the motherfucking show Comedy.
I don't even know how I want to present what

(01:12:26):
I want to present it as, but it's coming back
and it won't be a podcast though.

Speaker 2 (01:12:31):
But I also be looking for my own movie that
I will be directing and.

Speaker 6 (01:12:40):
Co directing with Agi of Motherfucker Rod Reeves Workouge Blues
co star my Nigga my Take Records.

Speaker 2 (01:12:49):
You know what I'm saying, I got again. I'm really
guaran towards shoot that I forgot. You forget about a
bitch ass thing, man. Uh man.

Speaker 1 (01:13:01):
You're doing something like I'm.

Speaker 6 (01:13:05):
Learned in the past two years business wise, is to
take my time and do things in my time because
it's my time. It's my time it so I'm putting
it together. It's not gonna make this when it comes
popping out. Boom, okay, oh, shout out Laddy Entertainment shout

(01:13:31):
out to right, y'all.

Speaker 2 (01:13:36):
Don't even know what she doing because whatever I'm doing,
she's doing, so none of y'all business what she doing
the sons of bitches, But nah, all right, we great,
get up out of here. Man. I appreciate you all
for tuning in to the very first show, the premiere
episode of Beyond the Beard. Thank you to all my

(01:13:57):
people on Facebook Live we tuned in. Thank you you
to everybody on YouTube who's tuning in. Thank you to
my lovely lady for coming out KB. Thank you to
my cousin Tony Mo fucking made for sliding out, being
the first guest. Thank you for being open and honest man,
and you know, giving your opinion. Thank you, good fuckle God.

(01:14:17):
I don't give fuck that part. You got to like me.
I love me. And with that being said, y'all be great,
get up out of here, and so appreciate y'all.