Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:09):
You loup shake again you love shake yeah you Yeah,
fuck you're quick.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
I got my brother cleaning my come my body, canned
fat the knuckle who had my love?
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Take?
Speaker 2 (00:28):
You got my brother come leading my copy, Come my.
Speaker 4 (00:33):
Boy, come.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
The knuckle up and knocking, who had my love? My love?
Speaker 5 (00:41):
Yeah, bless the fantasy and my killer in the face.
Speaker 6 (00:44):
Yeah, rowdy chicken, while you're fronting on your pay.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Yeah, rebel gang blackfee Honey, that's a gang.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
Huh.
Speaker 5 (00:51):
Set my paper by my beingess fucking saying pitch.
Speaker 4 (00:54):
I wrote try and sell me.
Speaker 5 (00:55):
I just wrote line them up and knock him down.
Speaker 4 (00:57):
I treat the old like down my nose, give my
good smile and tired. I don't make friends to fund
my throats.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Seeing your claim mistakes, I pray your people get exposed.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
Let them know.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
I mean, anybody get better with them alone.
Speaker 4 (01:08):
The shoots the better of them.
Speaker 7 (01:09):
Stone, I can't have been u back in the second.
Speaker 5 (01:10):
If I can figure my enemy a ready fish, friend
of my chemistring the matter, packet of pet and the
part and I'm looking at when they told me to,
I can see when they they put the dream and
believe me tricking another game and the Winnow to the
part jumped in the ride of the beat like.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
Raiding the ass, and I feel like you with the
fire of.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
The sixth a lie but threes to the sick They.
Speaker 6 (01:27):
See me and I'm getting like and that it was easy.
We've never been broke up with turn in the garden,
probably broke your clean. I got my brother in my cot.
They crumb my buddy the knuckle.
Speaker 4 (01:41):
Nothing's so hot. Not trust my love.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
I got my brother in my cot. See tripping bout
my bucket, Come by that the knuckle, love me nothing.
Speaker 3 (01:54):
I'm so hot.
Speaker 4 (01:56):
Never trust my love.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Okay, I don't need nobody else around me, bitch, I
got my.
Speaker 4 (02:00):
Brother sid trust some motherfucker. Are you niggas on the
cool slick with biggers undercovers bad and boosie bitches lovers
for on the fuck with out a rubber bitch must
take dad.
Speaker 7 (02:10):
I'm gonna suck that. Don't play me fucking on lame.
Speaker 5 (02:12):
I got my gang of business, bitch, we do no
spit boxing leaving stains a business, bitch.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Blood suck the motherfucker show my fings a business pitch.
Speaker 7 (02:20):
Gotta scope on my a. I'm blong braining out the.
Speaker 5 (02:23):
Motherfucker want to get get in and I'm gone for los.
Speaker 7 (02:25):
Take a minute to get in.
Speaker 4 (02:26):
The back of one packing the back to the back
of the life.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
You notice fact that I'm.
Speaker 4 (02:28):
Gonna give me your pack of that strong niggas want.
Speaker 7 (02:30):
To pick up the game, but I'm a niggas a bag.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
Like the Biggie song.
Speaker 4 (02:32):
You bitch keep brawing my line and that on mind.
Speaker 7 (02:34):
And she can't wait to give me that ball.
Speaker 4 (02:36):
Huh yeah, right to the loot with the folk like
a traveling the mile of it bloo like, oh, passing
this out with your whole like she want to deep
down and the thought like.
Speaker 7 (02:43):
Shit is too easy. All of you niggas too bumming.
You're peasy fucking the round with one of my brothers.
I promise you niggas would never rest.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
In my cutt. My buddy cat this beat. Trust my mother,
Come my brother, come, come.
Speaker 1 (03:09):
The knuckle up and looking up. Trust my luck.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
One more, one more mother, Yes, Lord, Welcome to another
episode of Beyond the Beard. Today is Sunday, July thirteenth,
twenty twenty five. I got the day. It's a new day, baby,
It's a new day. Let's go damn, it's a new day.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
You didn't ask.
Speaker 7 (03:47):
Yeah, I ain't asking nothing, you know what I mean? So, yeah,
it's just it's the it's the new strain.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
I got it. This got me.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
I mean on my way to bust in the day,
everybody talking, everybody talking about it, just because I always.
Speaker 7 (04:00):
Eat my hat on, young mean.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
Without a hat on it a minute, right, right, So
and I forgot right.
Speaker 4 (04:07):
I mean appreciated respect refact. So I'm your boy, myn
take a rebel ft D black three headed represented the
motherfucking building. I got my co host Ali in the building.
Speaker 7 (04:21):
Was going on?
Speaker 1 (04:21):
Were in here? I'm good.
Speaker 4 (04:23):
How was your weekend?
Speaker 1 (04:23):
Brother, I've been I've been chilling. It's been laid back.
I've been.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
Trying to enjoy this new PC that I got. So
I've been just chilling. It's been a cool, laid back weekend.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
I was supposed to hit some shows up and some
stuff like that, but yeah, I've just been chilling. Man,
It've been good.
Speaker 7 (04:40):
Man. What is what the hell is going on?
Speaker 1 (04:44):
Bro? In uh?
Speaker 7 (04:48):
In this world of ours?
Speaker 1 (04:49):
Bro?
Speaker 7 (04:49):
Like, what the hell is going on?
Speaker 1 (04:51):
In which part of the world.
Speaker 7 (04:53):
Have you been seeing it?
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Like this?
Speaker 4 (04:56):
And it's yeah, Bro, have you seen that ship dog?
It is the craziest shit, bro, far I see someone
wol Ski and Daisy Ban and now did you see
that the Savage and you see the look young murder
sav She's like, I'm like, yo, this, I don't usually
talk about that on this show, but I had to
(05:16):
say something.
Speaker 3 (05:16):
If I don't see if somebody send it to me.
So I see it right right, and it's unfortunate.
Speaker 1 (05:22):
Man. I hate it like I hate the end fighting.
I hate the it's making me. It's reminded me of.
Speaker 3 (05:28):
Like late two thousand and fourteen, twenty and fifteen.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
It's like a lot of petty, silly shit going on
in the scene.
Speaker 4 (05:37):
So but somebody goo nd up getting hurt. Somebody gonna
end up getting hurt, bro. And that's that's the that's
my own thing.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
That happened before, you know, with certain individuals.
Speaker 3 (05:49):
You know what I'm saying, Hopefully it don't go that route,
like if it if it just stayed to the fist,
to the fist, the cuffs, I'm with it, you know
what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (05:58):
The niggas don know how to take an ass whipping, bro.
You know that well, either not know how to take
as that's.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
True, but hopefully it stays there and you know, it
don't go no further than that, but we have seen
it go further than that in the past here locally,
and a lot of the times it's because of you know,
street beef, hood stuff, you know what I'm saying, But
it'd be deeper than rap a lot of the times.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
But yeah, hopefully it stays there.
Speaker 3 (06:26):
But I just more than anything, for me, it just
looked bad on the scene like here it is. I
speak highly of a lot of you guys, you know,
and then it's like a slap in the face for real,
for real, and hell is disrespectful to people like me
who really believe in the scene and really do the
most that I can to try to put the whole
(06:48):
city on, no matter.
Speaker 1 (06:50):
Who it is.
Speaker 3 (06:50):
If I think you're talented and I think you're doing
some positive shit, I be talking highly of you, and
then next thing, you know, you slap me in my
face by going live and doing all the silliness. They
don't realize that, but that's the thing I spoke about,
like blackballing yourself in the city before, and people say, oh,
it's impossible, to blackball yourself in the city because there
(07:12):
ain't no people who are movers and shakers and spending money.
Speaker 1 (07:17):
Well, I talk to those type of people on a
weekly basis.
Speaker 7 (07:20):
Because you don't know them, just because you don't know him,
know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (07:24):
Yeah, So I speak to those people on a weekly basis,
and I know that they are around, they exist, and
they looking for me, They looking at what I do, right, So, man,
it's just it's just really disrespectful shit. A couple of
weeks ago, I had a guy call me and apologized
(07:45):
to me one day, and then the next day I
had to go live because he's disrespectful.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
Dude.
Speaker 4 (07:54):
Yeah, listen, man, if I ain't never wanted something, I
don't even know dude, right, I don't even But he
had a situation, he had a situation where my cousin's
kids father, right, So he put her in the middle
of that shit and made a whole video meme with
her face on.
Speaker 7 (08:13):
Like some s weard shit.
Speaker 4 (08:15):
Bro. So I message, dude, listen, I have nothing to
do with what y'all got going on. But that is
a female with children who has nothing at all to
do with what you and this man got going on.
You don't know who she connected to. So I'm respectfully,
humbly asking you to please delete that, if not further
(08:42):
action to be taken. That's all I said. He tried
to get on some to a couple of people, so
a couple of people let him know, like, hey, yeah,
if he he ain't do that, broake do that. And
he did and then he ended up apologize. You know
what I'm saying. So I ain't had no problem to
(09:02):
do since, and she hasn't either.
Speaker 3 (09:04):
Yeah, you know, he went on the whole stream of
trolling events. I just I have to realize one thing
is my position when it comes to certain things. I've
noticed that certain people they try to show me and
antagonized me because they think it's gonna help their star rise.
(09:26):
And after I go live on they ass I realize that.
But I don't even be feeling bad about going live
on them because you pushed me there.
Speaker 1 (09:35):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (09:36):
And everybody's like, man, what's going on? Because Ali don't
this is not Ali. He don't do this, So you
automatically you think you you're doing something that you're gonna
make yourself bigger.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
But everybody who does this with me, they lose.
Speaker 4 (09:53):
Because I go live, which is a good segue into
today's into today's show, from bottom to owning it. Why
anger isn't always strength, That's one of our talking points.
Second talking point is learning the process emotions without dumping them,
and the third talking point would be tools for your
(10:13):
emotional regulation. First one, why anger isn't always strength? What
do you think about that shit?
Speaker 3 (10:22):
Like just straight off the topic we're talking about, like,
you know the way that this person we talking about
is trying to attack us back, were talking to him
respectfully and he using the anger to you know what
I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
I think it's his strength, and it's not good when
you do.
Speaker 4 (10:40):
That, But that that shows that to me, that shows
like a lack of communication.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Skin, you don't know how to communicate your.
Speaker 4 (10:46):
Emotionally, a wreck. You know, you can't control your emotions right.
And honestly, I used to have that problem where if
anybody said something to me, automatically took it as though
you're coming at me like you're trying to check me
in something. And I had to learn that every situation
wasn't that, and I'm not above being checked If that's
what you want to call it shit, I check. I
(11:10):
think I think we all need to check each other.
Speaker 7 (11:12):
Fact.
Speaker 4 (11:13):
But it's in a manner that you do it, you
know what I mean. It's like, it's not what you say,
is how you say it. Yeah, so you if you
come as somebody in a in a fucked up manner,
that's what you're gonna receive back. Right nine and a
half times out of ten. You know what I'm saying,
You're gonna meet that aggression right back, which is gonna
(11:33):
cause you to be like, because you know where you're
coming from with it, and now he taking it a
certain type of way, he gonna say something to you,
and now you're like, who the fuck you talking to?
And then boom that that go. You know what I'm
saying when it if we if a lot of us
just take time to really think first before we speak,
(11:54):
and sometimes a lot of shit don't even need to
be spoken on or spoken about.
Speaker 7 (12:00):
And I'm learning that.
Speaker 4 (12:02):
Because there's a couple of times last week I just
wanted to punch a couple of niggas in the face
just for breathing, bro, just for breathing, real, just for breathing.
I want to punch you in the fucking mouth, and
and I had to. I'm I'm, I'm and my lady,
she she, she's the one, She's the.
Speaker 7 (12:24):
She's the more not well, she's more.
Speaker 4 (12:27):
Logical than I am in a lot of situations. I'm
a logical person on certain things, but when they come
to how I feel like you're trying to do me
the one, Yeah, that shit is gone because how I
feel is how I feel. So if you didn't do something,
I wouldn't feel that way what I'm feeling, you.
Speaker 7 (12:50):
Know what I'm saying. So yeah, and the anger isn't
always strength because that shit leads to something else, right.
Speaker 4 (13:00):
I think anger, if not controlled the right way or
use the right way, is a weakness. It can't be
a weakness. It can hurt you in a lot of
ways because you like you're not with anger. I think
your ego getting away, pride getting away, depending on what
(13:23):
the situation is. Oh this motherfucker trying to carry me
a certain way. Oh you think you're trying to get
something off on me, whatever the situation may be. But
nine times out of ten, that's what it is like.
Oh this nigga trying to play me a motherfucker think
they can get something off.
Speaker 3 (13:39):
Yeah, I think that's like, you know, for again, the
type of people we are, you know, where we come from.
Things like that, We've got that thing where it's like
we have to we have to look at it that way,
like are.
Speaker 1 (13:55):
They trying to get one off on me? Are they
trying to get over you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (14:00):
With the experiences you've had in life, you know what
I'm saying, experiences I've had, Like that's we look at
things like that and then you see a person who's like,
hasn't come from what we come from, right, and they're
more trusting, and.
Speaker 1 (14:12):
You all know he's cool, is all right, and you're like, nah, it's.
Speaker 4 (14:16):
Just they get licked every time.
Speaker 7 (14:18):
They get looked at.
Speaker 4 (14:21):
What you say, nine and a half and half your
ads get licked every time.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
So I think, you know, that's just one of those
things we have in our bid you know, because of
that background and because of being uh treated dishonestly and
trust being broken, you know what I'm saying at all
the things that we've talked about before.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
But yeah, the anger a lot of the time, Like
I always look at anger like this. I used to
study martial arts a lot.
Speaker 3 (14:55):
One of the worst things you can do is a fighter,
is be angry because the anger blinds you.
Speaker 1 (15:01):
You make you make mistakes.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
You make mistakes, you make moves, you throw punches, you
throw things that you wouldn't do because you angry. And
then you learn how to take a hit and not
get angry from it, and just okay, yeah you got
me on that one. Let's play it. Let's play the game.
You know what I'm saying, because that's what the fight
really is. But initially it's the anger. You know, you
even want to fight anger, you know, h But the
(15:27):
biggest strength is learned how to control the anger in
martial arts. So anger could be a bad thing because,
like I said, you get so angry, you get blinded
by the rage, and you just want to you just
want to, you know, destroy whatever's infuriated you.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
You know what I'm saying. So yeah, anger could be a.
Speaker 3 (15:52):
Definite weakness if not learned how to harness and control.
You mean, look at so many villains, Darth Vader and
Ken Skywalker before he was Darth Vader. You've seen the movies. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
he tried to You got you, bro, don't try to
fight me.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
I'm up here. I got the high ground, bro. It's
over anger and ego and pride, and he lost all
his limbs and was laying in the lot. I'm just saying,
you know what I mean. It be in the movies.
It shown enough.
Speaker 7 (16:25):
It be a lot of signs. It's a lot of
signs in the movies.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Yeah, a lot of truth teaching us ship a lot
of truth. You just be looking at the action. But
it like, damn, he died because of his anger and pride.
Speaker 4 (16:38):
Yeah that's true though, that's true.
Speaker 7 (16:42):
So the next thing is learning to.
Speaker 4 (16:48):
Process your emotions without dumping them.
Speaker 7 (16:52):
A lot of people don't even know what dumping, what
dumping is.
Speaker 4 (16:57):
Coming from. I've been in like therapeutic communities because when
I was in the phase, I started this program call
anger Frustration ventilation. Okay, so what that does. It just
teaches you ways of how to deal with your frustrations,
(17:19):
process your emotions, having self talks with yourself. Yeah, and
learning how learn basically, learning how to process and deal
with life and emotions without dumping. And dumping is a
(17:39):
term that's used paraphrasing. It's basically just like throwing up.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
Yeah, you know.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
What I mean, You're just letting it all out, just
you know what I'm saying. And then when you do that,
it's nine times out of ten it comes out in
a bad way. Stuffing is like Matchine having a chest
on the floor and you just putting all everything in there,
(18:15):
all your toys, everything and there, and you got so
much in there you can't even close the top no more.
So you keep trying to put shit in there. Eventually
pops open. Jack in the box pops open. You know
what I'm saying. So learning learning to process your emotions is.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
For me.
Speaker 4 (18:38):
It was always a struggle because I mean just a
lot of people that I held close to me, Like
I said, Like I said before, a lot of people
are held close to me. Really they stuck the knife
in my side, you know what I mean. You're supposed
to be right here with me, I mean, and both
(19:01):
Like even with the situation with me, with me doing this,
this this thing with Dave's, you wouldn't bro You wouldn't
believe how many people since this situation started has been
like I see the change in people, you know what
I mean? Hm, It ain't even the real money been
exchanged yet or even had yet, you know what I'm saying.
(19:24):
But it's just the possibility that they know what you
know what I mean, And it's like, hmmm, they people
asking ship they asked me for you know what I mean.
I'm just like, just because you see me with dude,
or you see me doing this, that and the third
like that don't mean that, you know what I mean,
we're in that position, you know what I'm saying. And
(19:44):
even if we were, what makes you think, right, Like,
what makes you think that we're there? I had to
ask when I when I answered the phone, I had
to ask.
Speaker 7 (19:55):
Who was this?
Speaker 3 (19:57):
The good thing is they reveal of themselves early. Yeah,
I guess we could look at it that way. That's
one of the best things I've been over the last
few months, over the last year, me having to go
live three four times on people. That's the best thing
I've understood, is they revealing theyself early because these was
people I wanted to give opportunities to a lot of
the time. So that's the best thing about it. But
(20:21):
it's just unfortunate that it even has to come to that,
you know, right, But.
Speaker 1 (20:27):
Yeah, I was taught not to bottle it in.
Speaker 3 (20:32):
I'm very fortunate for my mother teaching me that, you
know what I'm saying. I know, I talk a lot
about my pops being in the penitentiary and my mom's
working a lot, you know what I'm saying, So a
lot of the times I felt, you know, what's going
on retro, felt a little bit of you know, like
(20:55):
like I said before, my grandmother and grandfather raised me
so but but she did teach me lessons. And one
of the lessons that she taught me, and I took
a lot, was not to bottle it all up, you
know what I'm saying, Talk to somebody, talk to me.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
So at least I was able to do that with
my moms, you know what I mean. But a lot
of people don't have that. A lot of people don't
have that.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
And then once you get in to the point of
being older, you know, getting to the point of being
teenage years and really exploring the world on your own,
I think those things change a little bit because some
of the things that you need to talk to someone about,
you might not feel comfortable talking to them about, you
know what I'm saying, because you might feel you're gonna get.
Speaker 1 (21:38):
Into trouble or you're gonna be judged.
Speaker 3 (21:40):
So you talk to it about your peers who talk
to it, about it with your peers who don't know
better than you do. But y'all just figuring it out
the best way y'all can so. But at least I
was able to have that instilled in my mind at
a young age, like don't just stuff it.
Speaker 4 (22:00):
You know what I wish now, bro, I wish that
we didn't look at therapy the way that it was
looked at back in the day, because until I started
going to therapy, I used to think like, well, I
don't need to talk to nobody about nothing.
Speaker 7 (22:15):
But like it was.
Speaker 4 (22:18):
It was helpful, you know, because the stigma back in
the day, if you go see a therapist, it's like,
what's wrong with him? I'm wrong with that motherfucker, you
know what I mean. It was always looked at it
something like bad.
Speaker 7 (22:30):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
Well, it's like it's a misunderstood you know, it's a misunder.
Speaker 4 (22:33):
Because in the hood, nobody's trying to hear your problems. Nah,
nobody's trying to hear that. Yeah, stop whinting, stop complaining it,
man up, deal with it, figure it out.
Speaker 7 (22:42):
That's that's what we was told, right.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
And then shit like you get the time about your
problems and you look over and you see somebody who
got problems ten times worse than your life.
Speaker 7 (22:51):
Man, you know what I'm going through any shit.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
I was just talking.
Speaker 3 (22:55):
About some shit like on my string the other day
and I was like, you know what I'm I don't
even know.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
What I'm talking about. This shit for us people that's
going through like this ain't.
Speaker 4 (23:02):
Nothing, Yeah, you know what I mean. Me and my
lady just had a conversation the other day where her
and I was, you know, basically complaining about some things
that's going wrong.
Speaker 7 (23:13):
And it's nothing major to me.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
It's a major because of what it's gonna cost me
to get it fixed. And you know this, that and
the third right, and she like, look this refrigerator full,
that d freezer full. Every bill has a zero balance,
right right, the mortgage is up to date. Like, were good,
(23:37):
We're good. We'll figure that other shit out right right,
We're good, you know what I'm saying. And she she
I ain't gonna lie, like she make way more money now,
she in the six figures. You know what I'm saying.
Well off into the six figures, I'm just hitting fifty
(23:58):
five sixty. I'm like somewhere around there, right, that's with
the you know, the W two's.
Speaker 7 (24:09):
But yeah, but but.
Speaker 4 (24:13):
She she she did the steps that she had to
do to make sure and and put a plan together
to make sure that you know, look, this is what
we're gonna do to make sure that we are As
long as we stick to this, we're good, right, you
know what I mean. If I didn't have her to
talk to or have her to guide me and basically
be like, calm down, we all right, this is how
(24:35):
we're gonna figure this out, bro, I probably I probably
flip and go just off the handle and just do something,
you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Yeah, yeah, for real, I get it.
Speaker 3 (24:47):
But yo, that's why you got the you know, you
got your wonderful wife in your life, because they be
sent for a reason.
Speaker 1 (24:54):
I say the same thing about sugar Grits. I'd be like,
man if.
Speaker 7 (24:58):
It wants sometimes, but.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
If it wasn't for her, you know, she's just slowed
my life down. I was.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
I was doing a lot, you know, because I was
trying to achieve things, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (25:13):
And that's just the simple fact of the matter.
Speaker 4 (25:15):
But now she's become like a therapist or we become
like a therapist kind of like for each other.
Speaker 3 (25:21):
Yeah, yeah, and that that you know, that's what that's
what a relationship supposed to be. Like you supposed to
be able to talk to your partner about things like that. Nah,
it'd be it'd be some things that is just beyond
your control. And it's like, I really don't know what
to do. You gotta talk to somebody else besides me
about it. But yeah, that's what you post. You know,
(25:41):
if you ain't talking to your partner about the ship
that's going on, I don't even understand what they're there for.
Speaker 4 (25:46):
So so for you, what is the process of processing
your emotions without duping them?
Speaker 7 (25:50):
Look like.
Speaker 3 (25:52):
I just like, uh, silid thinking. If I be an honest,
I just need solitudes so I can process. That's my emotions.
Like when I get to a certain point, I need
to be away from whatever it is. I ain't gotta
go far away, but I just might need to step outside,
take a little walk or something like that. But solitude
(26:13):
is silence is my way to process, Like.
Speaker 1 (26:16):
I think things through.
Speaker 3 (26:18):
I want like another thing my mama told me was
think before you speak, you know what I'm saying, because
words is you know, they sharp.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
So she always told me, think before you speak.
Speaker 3 (26:33):
So I always try to think in process before I
go off the handle and say some shit that's gonna
hurt the person feelings, because I will say some shit
that's gonna hurt the person feelings, and.
Speaker 7 (26:43):
People always remember.
Speaker 4 (26:44):
They may never remember what you do, but they always
gonna remember what you said and how you made them feel.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
Facts.
Speaker 7 (26:51):
They always remember that.
Speaker 1 (26:53):
Yeah, that's real.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
So I try to keep that in mind because I
don't want, you know, I know how to feel if
somebody's say some shit out the way to me. But
at the same time, when I get to the point
of even having to say something, all that tone and
everything is out the window because I've probably said it
quite a few times, you know what I'm saying. So
when I say to the point where you gotta where
I really gotta, you gotta feel me. I'm sorry that
(27:18):
it came out that way or whatever, but you gotta
realize I said it like.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
Five times already might be more right, you know.
Speaker 3 (27:26):
So, But my process is just I just like to
be in solitude, be able to think you know what
I mean.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
In silence alone, and then I could come.
Speaker 3 (27:38):
Back to the situation to talk about it without going
off the handle.
Speaker 4 (27:41):
See me, I'll roll like a couple backwoods up.
Speaker 1 (27:45):
That might be part of the process.
Speaker 4 (27:47):
I get my call, you ride and I ride.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
But do you listen to music or you just ride? Now?
Speaker 7 (27:54):
I listen to music.
Speaker 4 (27:55):
Yeah, see, because the music I put on a certain
I'll put on a certain song got you. And then
I think, yeah, see music probably, but see I don't look.
But see I don't listen to what you think. I'll listen.
Speaker 3 (28:09):
That's what I'm gonna say, though, Like, naw, what when
you said I put on a certain song, I.
Speaker 1 (28:14):
Already know it ain't what you know what I mean? Like,
do you share? Do you care to share a certain song?
Speaker 7 (28:21):
It could be it could be like.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
Neo soul, see what I'm saying, Okay.
Speaker 4 (28:31):
Anything to soothe anything, anything from Tupac Okay, Okay, you
know what I'm saying. Yeah, And I just ride right
And as I'm listening because I'm I'm so familiar with
the with this, with this music, I'm not even really
listening to what they're saying.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
Right, you already got that.
Speaker 4 (28:55):
Yeah, but as I'm riding, I don't even know where
I'm going, but just off muscle memory, I'm hitting, you know.
But by time, by time this bun is done, I
figured it out, or I'm kind of you know what
I'm saying, or I've calmed down, or whatever the case
may be, right, and then that's it.
Speaker 7 (29:17):
But now at this.
Speaker 4 (29:18):
Point, like I can't, I haven't just gotten up gotten
the car, you know, just because I haven't really haven't
had any situations that made me be like that, you
know what I mean. My lady's getting me to the
point where she's like, you know, she wants me to
be more open and vocal and and talk with her more, right,
you know what I'm saying. And I had a problem
(29:39):
with that at first. Not that I had a problem
of speaking with her, It's just that when you're so
used to just having a bottle shit up and deal
with shit the way you've been dealing with it for
so long, and you got somebody telling you, like, no, listen,
you can lean on me, you know what I mean,
it's kind of hard to just jump right into that, right,
I mean.
Speaker 3 (29:58):
Just yeah, when right, way so long?
Speaker 4 (30:03):
Yeah, So it's a learning process for me still even
to this day and we've been together four years, just
to like break down and be like, look, because as men,
we want to figure sit out on our own first
before we even come to you and say this is
what the problem is, right, But with them, it's like, no,
if something's going on, don't stretch yourself about it, tell
(30:26):
me and we can figure it out together. Because it's
like if if men are supposed to be ahead of
the household, if you not right in the house not
right right, or if she not right the house not
right right right, the atmosphere and the vibe is kind
of off, you know what I'm saying. So, yeah, that's
stuff that I've that I'm still learning right to this day.
Speaker 3 (30:49):
Yeah, that's it takes some learning. It takes some learning.
Sugar said, all women want fad, She.
Speaker 7 (30:57):
Said, all women want that.
Speaker 1 (30:58):
Yeah, yeah, I believe that.
Speaker 3 (31:03):
Like I said, I just sometimes when I get to
a point, I just don't want to talk immediately, you
know what I mean. I just need a minute, like
you said, right, figured it out and then you come
back to it.
Speaker 1 (31:13):
But the talk to us happen.
Speaker 3 (31:15):
It's just I need some time, Like especially if I'm
at a certain point.
Speaker 1 (31:19):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (31:21):
But yeah, it's definitely a thing that you have to learn,
you know what I'm saying. You have to learn how
to control your emotions, especially when you're dealing with a
relationship and then you know, your kids and everything like that.
It'll be hard because man, they don't they they don't listen,
Like they just don't listen.
Speaker 1 (31:38):
We don't understand it.
Speaker 3 (31:39):
And so you really got kids and interacting with them,
how much we didn't listen as children.
Speaker 1 (31:45):
They just don't listen. But it's not it's not that
they just they just so caught up.
Speaker 3 (31:49):
In everything that's going on. You know, the focus is
like everywhere. So but yeah, it's just a thing that's tough,
but you learn how to process that. I've learned how
to deal with it over years. Like I said, I'm
a lot better now than I was in my twenties,
because in my twenties I was just spasm.
Speaker 1 (32:07):
I'm I'm a fly off the handle.
Speaker 3 (32:09):
But now, you know, it's like I have to get
to a point that I, you know, yeah, really address it.
It's not that it's bottling it up. It's just that
some things ain't even worth the talk. Or addressing it.
Speaker 4 (32:25):
It's like, okay, so that goes into the next talking point.
Then what are the tools for emotional regulation.
Speaker 3 (32:33):
Well for your own self, like you know they might
be I got a problem with it with emotional regulation.
Speaker 4 (32:41):
Yeah, I ain't like listen.
Speaker 7 (32:45):
Sometimes I man, it's it's with me.
Speaker 4 (32:52):
It's like, because I don't disrespect people, right, I don't
go off. That's just not the vibe with you know
what I mean. I come from a different era with like,
we don't we don't do disrespect, you know what I mean.
And that was even even even like before I went
to the fas back in the day and went to prison,
et cetera, et cetera. But prison is where you learn.
(33:14):
Then people may not understand this, but prison and the
fairs and shit like that, that is where you learn
and will find some of the most respectful people on
this earth, bro, because the men have a respect for
one another and they're like, you don't. It's it's I
don't want to get into it. It's a whole thing.
(33:36):
But it's a lot of respect, you know what I'm saying.
But if if anybody said anything to me, I'm always
quick to go off, like and and it's it's not
it's not coming from a tough guy place and that
it's just from what I've been through, you know what
(33:57):
I mean, and ship that I've survived and was blessed
to come out of, you know what I mean. So
it's like I've never given the person a chance to
even get one up on me.
Speaker 7 (34:09):
I'm not gonna let you do that.
Speaker 4 (34:11):
So if you sit here and get to hollering and
screaming and doing all this, rah rah rah, all right, cool,
you know what I mean, I'm not great do none
of that with you.
Speaker 7 (34:21):
I'm not gonna do none of that.
Speaker 4 (34:23):
And that's always been my mentality, and it's always it's
just always how I played the game right, and it's
got me in trouble a few times, court cases, money
and lawyers and this that and the third. I'm older now,
so I don't even put myself in them type of positions.
I never put myself in the positions then. But it
(34:44):
was just and I can say this because you know
a lot of people say I don't bother nobody, I
don't do nothing, but bro I honestly played the game
fair all the way around the ball. So I never
was the disrespectful dude, you know what I mean. So
anything anything that I've done, and I've always reacted tom
to your action. Like I said, it's there was no
(35:09):
emotional regulation with me.
Speaker 7 (35:11):
You do this, I boomed.
Speaker 4 (35:12):
This is my next thing because I don't want to
do the back and forth. I don't have time to
be beefing with you today to see you next week
and then you want some other ship and then were great,
do this right now? You know what I mean, Avid Goal,
You know what I mean. But I got kids to
live for. I got a family, you know what I'm saying.
I got a lot of stuff now that that even then,
(35:34):
you know what I'm saying. But as you know younger,
you like you don't think about none of that.
Speaker 7 (35:39):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (35:40):
Let's get it popping right now. Worried about none of that.
But as you get older, you know what I mean,
you realize there's more ship than you know to life
and to lose that, you know what I mean. So
you move different, you grow, you know what I'm saying.
You matured, you know what I mean, and then you
try to be the best example you can't for your kids.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
Right.
Speaker 4 (36:01):
So that's why I tell my sons, man, like I've
done all this other shit. That's why I'm trying to
show you something different, you know what I mean. Like
my other son who's in prison now, like I showed
him the map, this is not what you want to do.
He bumped his head and had to go that way, right.
(36:22):
He didn't have emotional regulation, even though I try to
give it to him and show him something. You gotta
learn on your own facts. But he didn't have emotional regulation.
Speaker 3 (36:33):
Yeah, one time, my son he twenty five now, but
he told me once he said it was like when
he was a teen that she was like, I'm telling him,
you know, you don't want to do this, you don't
want to do that.
Speaker 1 (36:47):
He's like, Pops, some people just gotta learn hard. I
was like, well, at least you know, you know what
I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (36:54):
Right right, And fortunately he didn't have to learn too
hard the way you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (37:00):
He had his run hands with the lot and things
like that.
Speaker 4 (37:02):
And for sure enough, and see that's but see, for me,
that was a hard thing. Like happened to see my
son go to trial and lose trial, and he was
on the news and the whole none, you know what
I'm saying. So like, as a father, I felt like
I failed because my job as a father to keep
my sons out of prison and keep my daughter off
(37:23):
the stripple pole. That's my job as a father, you
know what I'm saying. Like for real, that's my job
as a father to keep my sons out of prison,
keep my daughter off a stripple pole. And I feel
like I feel like I lost, I failed in that regard,
you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 7 (37:40):
But I don't know, man, It's just he.
Speaker 4 (37:45):
Was kept from me for so long, so by the
time I was able to connect with him, and you
know what I'm saying, he was already far gone off
into some other ship that I know I could have
deterred him from if I was able to have him,
you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
But the fact that you know, and we spoke about
that before, the fact that you wasn't able to have
him in your presence and you tried, really trying for that. Yeah,
so you have to give yourself some grace, you know
what I'm saying, on how you feel about that, because.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
It's only so much you can do. When the mother
does what they do.
Speaker 3 (38:19):
You know what I'm saying, A lot of the times
as fathers, we were getting to the point where the
system is starting to be more in our favor and
starting to look at the situation.
Speaker 7 (38:31):
Man, listen, they definitely are.
Speaker 4 (38:32):
Because I just went to court Monday, shout out to
Saint Louis County. Got joint custody in my kids. Yeah,
appreciate it. Everything went in my favor. They was talking
about eight hundred and some dollars a month child support.
No serve, We're not doing none of that and all
this or other crap and YadA, YadA YadA. But long
story short, it went just the way I wanted it to.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
That's what's up. Congratulations. Thank you told me something about
that earlier in the week, but since then.
Speaker 4 (38:58):
Right, yep, I'm happy to and for you.
Speaker 3 (39:00):
Appreciate you, because like we go through a lot as fathers,
Like me as a young father and I got married
young and things like that.
Speaker 1 (39:09):
I went through a lot in that situation.
Speaker 3 (39:11):
Yeah you know what I mean, like stuff that live
with me forever, you know, just like this is something
that lives with you regardless. Yeah, you know, hey, I do.
I got to give myself some grace. But still, man, damn,
the what ifs is always there, you know what I mean?
Speaker 4 (39:27):
But uh yeah, yeah, I definitely understand. So it was
a good it was. It was man, it was a
good week. It was a good week. Hell yeah, definitely
a good week. That's what's up.
Speaker 1 (39:39):
But yeah, so.
Speaker 4 (39:42):
It's it's it's I'm learning emotional regulation. I'm learning, bro,
I'm learning. I struggle. I struggle with it because shit,
I just snapped on somebody the other day and my
lady like, it's not that cheerious, you know, it's not
that cheerious, not that serious.
Speaker 7 (39:59):
But to me, it be that.
Speaker 3 (40:01):
Series Like hey, don't get me wrong, I was a target,
like a couple of weeks ago, and I.
Speaker 1 (40:07):
Went to the island.
Speaker 3 (40:08):
This guy came out to island and he like saying
some out the way ship. After I said, excuse me,
you know what I'm saying, respectful, like a real respectful person,
real respectful, like, hey, you know how you doing nice
to everybody? But then when you do some goofy ship,
It's like I've become another.
Speaker 7 (40:28):
Right exactly exactly.
Speaker 3 (40:30):
But she I had looked at him, and my lady
Sugar had seen me. She was like, babe, don't even
worry about it. I was like, you heard me say,
excuse me, right.
Speaker 4 (40:40):
She was like, don't I think I think? I think
my chic being barrassed. Bro, She's like, oh my god,
you did not have to do that.
Speaker 1 (40:49):
And I ain't even take it there.
Speaker 7 (40:50):
I ain't saying nothing real like.
Speaker 1 (40:56):
It was the look. It was exactly that look.
Speaker 4 (40:58):
Like she always She said, why are you looking at
him like that? Like man?
Speaker 7 (41:02):
Because he just see what the he just did, like the.
Speaker 3 (41:09):
But seeing the things that they don't sit to God, bro,
to be things that they don't see that we.
Speaker 4 (41:13):
Do exactly exactly ship that they don't see that we
see it. They be like, oh my god, you did
not have to do that. I'm like, nah, I.
Speaker 1 (41:22):
Did keep this though, but then would it be a
female do it like? And they do?
Speaker 4 (41:29):
Listen, she quickly said, I snatched that bitch ball headed wrong?
What she do?
Speaker 1 (41:36):
Right?
Speaker 4 (41:37):
I saw the beach did look.
Speaker 3 (41:43):
Yeah for real though, right, it'd be like that it's
a double ass sword. But it's just you know, hm,
we we do the best we can in this world.
We come from the city. I come from the city
of Saint Louis. I'm from the south side of Saint Louis.
Your emotions have to be balanced to man.
Speaker 1 (42:03):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (42:03):
Around this motherfucker from any side of the city that
you had, I feel like you got to know how
to you know, because you don't know what the motherfucker
on day today mentally.
Speaker 1 (42:11):
You know what I'm saying, I don't know what they
you know, where they at? You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (42:15):
That's the fact ship, Like we were.
Speaker 1 (42:18):
Just talking about earlier.
Speaker 3 (42:19):
You know, you be sitting up, Damn, I don't know
how I'm gonna do this, and then you look over,
motherfucker got ten times the problems you got. It's like,
let me stop complaining it. So when you're dealing with
a person and you just spass out and you don't
know what they're dealing with. Shit, Just like the girl
this this McDonald's girl, you sink this.
Speaker 1 (42:39):
Shot. Now. She stabbed her. I think she stabbed the
manager or something.
Speaker 3 (42:43):
She said the manager was bullying her, cutting her out,
sending her home.
Speaker 4 (42:47):
And yeah, the little yeah with the little hair, Yeah
she well, she's.
Speaker 1 (42:53):
Got all kind of shit going on. People all over
instag You know she viral.
Speaker 4 (42:58):
Now, right, you know, but mm hmm, now people.
Speaker 3 (43:07):
Want to look at it, you know, now that you
know she already was something going on up there, But
wasn't nobody paying no attention to that?
Speaker 4 (43:15):
M hm, you know. And but they don't never pay
attention till something.
Speaker 1 (43:19):
Happens, until it happened before that they was there. Really, Look,
I didn't know nothing about this girl.
Speaker 3 (43:26):
Apparently she was a rapper and everything, but I ain't
know nothing about it. But now we know because she
ain't know how to regup.
Speaker 7 (43:40):
She could regulate her.
Speaker 3 (43:42):
Emotions and apparently the lady that she killed is nothing
to laugh about.
Speaker 1 (43:46):
The parent. The lady that she killed was a parent
of six.
Speaker 3 (43:50):
Yeah, but so like if the lady was bullying, because
that's just what the girl said on the video before
it happened, Like she the video and then she went back.
Speaker 4 (44:01):
And did it.
Speaker 7 (44:03):
That's premeditated.
Speaker 3 (44:04):
Well on the video, I don't think she said she
was gonna kill her, oh okay, but I think she
did say she was going back. Yeah, but she definitely
was talking about the lady who was bullying and everything
like that. That's it's unfortunate situation. But like, yeah, so
many people we don't have access to therapists and the
(44:25):
proper things that we need.
Speaker 4 (44:27):
But see, they there is access to it. You know,
I many listen, you know how many people That's what
I'm saying. People don't know they you know how many
people are on medicaid. They can go get a therapist medicaid.
But they're just they just don't They don't know, bro,
you know what I'm saying. They people just don't want
to take the time to read ship, look into ship like.
(44:50):
They just don't. Yeah, everybody want instant gratification.
Speaker 1 (44:56):
Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 4 (44:58):
Everybody wants just microwave solution to everything in life, bro,
and shit just don't work like that.
Speaker 7 (45:04):
It just don't as.
Speaker 4 (45:05):
Much as we wanted to this microwave solution ship, it
don't work.
Speaker 1 (45:09):
But it doesn't exist like this too.
Speaker 3 (45:11):
It's a lot of people that don't even think they
need to talk to nobody.
Speaker 1 (45:14):
They don't think they.
Speaker 7 (45:15):
Need and them are the nutcases for real.
Speaker 3 (45:20):
Yeah, well, they living in their reality, you know, they
living in the reality.
Speaker 1 (45:25):
They don't know.
Speaker 7 (45:26):
I don't know, man, I don't know, man, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (45:31):
Motherfucker.
Speaker 4 (45:32):
Cool.
Speaker 3 (45:32):
And they stopped taking their meds for they be a
whole different person.
Speaker 1 (45:35):
They living in the whole different reality. You know.
Speaker 4 (45:39):
Yeah, I guess, man, I guess, Man, I guess. I
ain't even notice that's Nando back there. That is peace, God,
peace sneaking. I ain't even paying attention, respect Homie Nando
on the building. Man, it's Saint Louis Legend. It's Lord, Yeah, man,
it's it's you know. I just I don't know, man,
(46:01):
I know, I know. Loss still working with me, you
know what I mean. That's all I can say, because
I can.
Speaker 7 (46:07):
I can.
Speaker 4 (46:09):
I feel like everybody has a switch, you know what
I'm saying, where all everybody in this room can coexist
with one another, right, you know what I'm saying. But
if you do the right thing, if you do the
right wrong thing, yeah, you're gonna see everybody in this
room change.
Speaker 1 (46:27):
Yeah, for real.
Speaker 7 (46:28):
Everybody in here is going to change. It be somebody
totally different.
Speaker 1 (46:32):
Nah. I was.
Speaker 3 (46:34):
I was in a discord watching like w W yesterday,
and it was a few people in the discord all
watching this, you know, and this person was talking and
they said some wild shit, and the whole mood of
the thing just like changed, like you really said that,
like in this discord, like it was weird, you know
(46:55):
what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (46:55):
The whole atmosphere has.
Speaker 4 (46:56):
Changed, so not on his ass.
Speaker 1 (46:59):
Yeah like you yeah it was.
Speaker 3 (47:02):
It's kind of weird, but it's just like very quickly
can the move change and the atmosphere changes.
Speaker 1 (47:08):
If a person do just the right thing, the right
wrong thing is right, you know exactly, you know? So yeah,
definitely definitely all right.
Speaker 4 (47:19):
So before we get up out of here, man, anything
that I said that it is right, that is, you know,
right and just and exact, that can help anybody that
truly has come from God and one other, no one
other than God, not myself. Anything that I said that
may have been wrong or offended anyone, clearly that is
from myself and my own naps, And I clearly sincerely apologize.
(47:40):
Uh yeah with that.
Speaker 7 (47:42):
You got anything to say before we get up out
of here?
Speaker 1 (47:44):
Man, it is what it is. You mad, be mad
at me? I can't speak for him.
Speaker 4 (47:54):
That's our show man, were up out here out.
Speaker 3 (48:00):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 1 (48:05):
You love shake again, you love shake?
Speaker 2 (48:09):
Yeah, but you're quick. I got my brother come, my cleaning,
my cock tripping from my body, my mother, candy faking
knuckle lot and nothing had never just my love you're taking.
Got my brother, Come leading my colling penick tripping, Come
my body, Come candy fucking knuckle, lot knocking lots, My love,
You loup shake again you love shake yeah you Yeah,
fuck you're quick.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
I got my brother cleaning my come my body, canned
fat the knuckle who had my love?
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Take?
Speaker 2 (00:28):
You got my brother come leading my copy, Come my.
Speaker 4 (00:33):
Boy, come.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
The knuckle up and knocking, who had my love? My love?
Speaker 5 (00:41):
Yeah, bless the fantasy and my killer in the face.
Speaker 6 (00:44):
Yeah, rowdy chicken, while you're fronting on your pay.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Yeah, rebel gang blackfee Honey, that's a gang.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
Huh.
Speaker 5 (00:51):
Set my paper by my beingess fucking saying pitch.
Speaker 4 (00:54):
I wrote try and sell me.
Speaker 5 (00:55):
I just wrote line them up and knock him down.
Speaker 4 (00:57):
I treat the old like down my nose, give my
good smile and tired. I don't make friends to fund
my throats.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Seeing your claim mistakes, I pray your people get exposed.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
Let them know.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
I mean, anybody get better with them alone.
Speaker 4 (01:08):
The shoots the better of them.
Speaker 7 (01:09):
Stone, I can't have been u back in the second.
Speaker 5 (01:10):
If I can figure my enemy a ready fish, friend
of my chemistring the matter, packet of pet and the
part and I'm looking at when they told me to,
I can see when they they put the dream and
believe me tricking another game and the Winnow to the
part jumped in the ride of the beat like.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
Raiding the ass, and I feel like you with the
fire of.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
The sixth a lie but threes to the sick They.
Speaker 6 (01:27):
See me and I'm getting like and that it was easy.
We've never been broke up with turn in the garden,
probably broke your clean. I got my brother in my cot.
They crumb my buddy the knuckle.
Speaker 4 (01:41):
Nothing's so hot. Not trust my love.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
I got my brother in my cot. See tripping bout
my bucket, Come by that the knuckle, love me nothing.
Speaker 3 (01:54):
I'm so hot.
Speaker 4 (01:56):
Never trust my love.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Okay, I don't need nobody else around me, bitch, I
got my.
Speaker 4 (02:00):
Brother sid trust some motherfucker. Are you niggas on the
cool slick with biggers undercovers bad and boosie bitches lovers
for on the fuck with out a rubber bitch must
take dad.
Speaker 7 (02:10):
I'm gonna suck that. Don't play me fucking on lame.
Speaker 5 (02:12):
I got my gang of business, bitch, we do no
spit boxing leaving stains a business, bitch.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Blood suck the motherfucker show my fings a business pitch.
Speaker 7 (02:20):
Gotta scope on my a. I'm blong braining out the.
Speaker 5 (02:23):
Motherfucker want to get get in and I'm gone for los.
Speaker 7 (02:25):
Take a minute to get in.
Speaker 4 (02:26):
The back of one packing the back to the back
of the life.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
You notice fact that I'm.
Speaker 4 (02:28):
Gonna give me your pack of that strong niggas want.
Speaker 7 (02:30):
To pick up the game, but I'm a niggas a bag.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
Like the Biggie song.
Speaker 4 (02:32):
You bitch keep brawing my line and that on mind.
Speaker 7 (02:34):
And she can't wait to give me that ball.
Speaker 4 (02:36):
Huh yeah, right to the loot with the folk like
a traveling the mile of it bloo like, oh, passing
this out with your whole like she want to deep
down and the thought like.
Speaker 7 (02:43):
Shit is too easy. All of you niggas too bumming.
You're peasy fucking the round with one of my brothers.
I promise you niggas would never rest.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
In my cutt. My buddy cat this beat. Trust my mother,
Come my brother, come, come.
Speaker 1 (03:09):
The knuckle up and looking up. Trust my luck.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
One more, one more mother, Yes, Lord, Welcome to another
episode of Beyond the Beard. Today is Sunday, July thirteenth,
twenty twenty five. I got the day. It's a new day, baby,
It's a new day. Let's go damn, it's a new day.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
You didn't ask.
Speaker 7 (03:47):
Yeah, I ain't asking nothing, you know what I mean? So, yeah,
it's just it's the it's the new strain.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
I got it. This got me.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
I mean on my way to bust in the day,
everybody talking, everybody talking about it, just because I always.
Speaker 7 (04:00):
Eat my hat on, young mean.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
Without a hat on it a minute, right, right, So
and I forgot right.
Speaker 4 (04:07):
I mean appreciated respect refact. So I'm your boy, myn
take a rebel ft D black three headed represented the
motherfucking building. I got my co host Ali in the building.
Speaker 7 (04:21):
Was going on?
Speaker 1 (04:21):
Were in here? I'm good.
Speaker 4 (04:23):
How was your weekend?
Speaker 1 (04:23):
Brother, I've been I've been chilling. It's been laid back.
I've been.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
Trying to enjoy this new PC that I got. So
I've been just chilling. It's been a cool, laid back weekend.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
I was supposed to hit some shows up and some
stuff like that, but yeah, I've just been chilling. Man,
It've been good.
Speaker 7 (04:40):
Man. What is what the hell is going on?
Speaker 1 (04:44):
Bro? In uh?
Speaker 7 (04:48):
In this world of ours?
Speaker 1 (04:49):
Bro?
Speaker 7 (04:49):
Like, what the hell is going on?
Speaker 1 (04:51):
In which part of the world.
Speaker 7 (04:53):
Have you been seeing it?
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Like this?
Speaker 4 (04:56):
And it's yeah, Bro, have you seen that ship dog?
It is the craziest shit, bro, far I see someone
wol Ski and Daisy Ban and now did you see
that the Savage and you see the look young murder
sav She's like, I'm like, yo, this, I don't usually
talk about that on this show, but I had to
(05:16):
say something.
Speaker 3 (05:16):
If I don't see if somebody send it to me.
So I see it right right, and it's unfortunate.
Speaker 1 (05:22):
Man. I hate it like I hate the end fighting.
I hate the it's making me. It's reminded me of.
Speaker 3 (05:28):
Like late two thousand and fourteen, twenty and fifteen.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
It's like a lot of petty, silly shit going on
in the scene.
Speaker 4 (05:37):
So but somebody goo nd up getting hurt. Somebody gonna
end up getting hurt, bro. And that's that's the that's
my own thing.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
That happened before, you know, with certain individuals.
Speaker 3 (05:49):
You know what I'm saying, Hopefully it don't go that route,
like if it if it just stayed to the fist,
to the fist, the cuffs, I'm with it, you know
what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (05:58):
The niggas don know how to take an ass whipping, bro.
You know that well, either not know how to take
as that's.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
True, but hopefully it stays there and you know, it
don't go no further than that, but we have seen
it go further than that in the past here locally,
and a lot of the times it's because of you know,
street beef, hood stuff, you know what I'm saying, But
it'd be deeper than rap a lot of the times.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
But yeah, hopefully it stays there.
Speaker 3 (06:26):
But I just more than anything, for me, it just
looked bad on the scene like here it is. I
speak highly of a lot of you guys, you know,
and then it's like a slap in the face for real,
for real, and hell is disrespectful to people like me
who really believe in the scene and really do the
most that I can to try to put the whole
(06:48):
city on, no matter.
Speaker 1 (06:50):
Who it is.
Speaker 3 (06:50):
If I think you're talented and I think you're doing
some positive shit, I be talking highly of you, and
then next thing, you know, you slap me in my
face by going live and doing all the silliness. They
don't realize that, but that's the thing I spoke about,
like blackballing yourself in the city before, and people say, oh,
it's impossible, to blackball yourself in the city because there
(07:12):
ain't no people who are movers and shakers and spending money.
Speaker 1 (07:17):
Well, I talk to those type of people on a
weekly basis.
Speaker 7 (07:20):
Because you don't know them, just because you don't know him,
know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (07:24):
Yeah, So I speak to those people on a weekly basis,
and I know that they are around, they exist, and
they looking for me, They looking at what I do, right, So, man,
it's just it's just really disrespectful shit. A couple of
weeks ago, I had a guy call me and apologized
(07:45):
to me one day, and then the next day I
had to go live because he's disrespectful.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
Dude.
Speaker 4 (07:54):
Yeah, listen, man, if I ain't never wanted something, I
don't even know dude, right, I don't even But he
had a situation, he had a situation where my cousin's
kids father, right, So he put her in the middle
of that shit and made a whole video meme with
her face on.
Speaker 7 (08:13):
Like some s weard shit.
Speaker 4 (08:15):
Bro. So I message, dude, listen, I have nothing to
do with what y'all got going on. But that is
a female with children who has nothing at all to
do with what you and this man got going on.
You don't know who she connected to. So I'm respectfully,
humbly asking you to please delete that, if not further
(08:42):
action to be taken. That's all I said. He tried
to get on some to a couple of people, so
a couple of people let him know, like, hey, yeah,
if he he ain't do that, broake do that. And
he did and then he ended up apologize. You know
what I'm saying. So I ain't had no problem to
(09:02):
do since, and she hasn't either.
Speaker 3 (09:04):
Yeah, you know, he went on the whole stream of
trolling events. I just I have to realize one thing
is my position when it comes to certain things. I've
noticed that certain people they try to show me and
antagonized me because they think it's gonna help their star rise.
(09:26):
And after I go live on they ass I realize that.
But I don't even be feeling bad about going live
on them because you pushed me there.
Speaker 1 (09:35):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (09:36):
And everybody's like, man, what's going on? Because Ali don't
this is not Ali. He don't do this, So you
automatically you think you you're doing something that you're gonna
make yourself bigger.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
But everybody who does this with me, they lose.
Speaker 4 (09:53):
Because I go live, which is a good segue into
today's into today's show, from bottom to owning it. Why
anger isn't always strength, That's one of our talking points.
Second talking point is learning the process emotions without dumping them,
and the third talking point would be tools for your
(10:13):
emotional regulation. First one, why anger isn't always strength? What
do you think about that shit?
Speaker 3 (10:22):
Like just straight off the topic we're talking about, like,
you know the way that this person we talking about
is trying to attack us back, were talking to him
respectfully and he using the anger to you know what
I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
I think it's his strength, and it's not good when
you do.
Speaker 4 (10:40):
That, But that that shows that to me, that shows
like a lack of communication.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Skin, you don't know how to communicate your.
Speaker 4 (10:46):
Emotionally, a wreck. You know, you can't control your emotions right.
And honestly, I used to have that problem where if
anybody said something to me, automatically took it as though
you're coming at me like you're trying to check me
in something. And I had to learn that every situation
wasn't that, and I'm not above being checked If that's
what you want to call it shit, I check. I
(11:10):
think I think we all need to check each other.
Speaker 7 (11:12):
Fact.
Speaker 4 (11:13):
But it's in a manner that you do it, you
know what I mean. It's like, it's not what you say,
is how you say it. Yeah, so you if you
come as somebody in a in a fucked up manner,
that's what you're gonna receive back. Right nine and a
half times out of ten. You know what I'm saying,
You're gonna meet that aggression right back, which is gonna
(11:33):
cause you to be like, because you know where you're
coming from with it, and now he taking it a
certain type of way, he gonna say something to you,
and now you're like, who the fuck you talking to?
And then boom that that go. You know what I'm
saying when it if we if a lot of us
just take time to really think first before we speak,
(11:54):
and sometimes a lot of shit don't even need to
be spoken on or spoken about.
Speaker 7 (12:00):
And I'm learning that.
Speaker 4 (12:02):
Because there's a couple of times last week I just
wanted to punch a couple of niggas in the face
just for breathing, bro, just for breathing, real, just for breathing.
I want to punch you in the fucking mouth, and
and I had to. I'm I'm, I'm and my lady,
she she, she's the one, She's the.
Speaker 7 (12:24):
She's the more not well, she's more.
Speaker 4 (12:27):
Logical than I am in a lot of situations. I'm
a logical person on certain things, but when they come
to how I feel like you're trying to do me
the one, Yeah, that shit is gone because how I
feel is how I feel. So if you didn't do something,
I wouldn't feel that way what I'm feeling, you.
Speaker 7 (12:50):
Know what I'm saying. So yeah, and the anger isn't
always strength because that shit leads to something else, right.
Speaker 4 (13:00):
I think anger, if not controlled the right way or
use the right way, is a weakness. It can't be
a weakness. It can hurt you in a lot of
ways because you like you're not with anger. I think
your ego getting away, pride getting away, depending on what
(13:23):
the situation is. Oh this motherfucker trying to carry me
a certain way. Oh you think you're trying to get
something off on me, whatever the situation may be. But
nine times out of ten, that's what it is like.
Oh this nigga trying to play me a motherfucker think
they can get something off.
Speaker 3 (13:39):
Yeah, I think that's like, you know, for again, the
type of people we are, you know, where we come from.
Things like that, We've got that thing where it's like
we have to we have to look at it that way,
like are.
Speaker 1 (13:55):
They trying to get one off on me? Are they
trying to get over you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (14:00):
With the experiences you've had in life, you know what
I'm saying, experiences I've had, Like that's we look at
things like that and then you see a person who's like,
hasn't come from what we come from, right, and they're
more trusting, and.
Speaker 1 (14:12):
You all know he's cool, is all right, and you're like, nah, it's.
Speaker 4 (14:16):
Just they get licked every time.
Speaker 7 (14:18):
They get looked at.
Speaker 4 (14:21):
What you say, nine and a half and half your
ads get licked every time.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
So I think, you know, that's just one of those
things we have in our bid you know, because of
that background and because of being uh treated dishonestly and
trust being broken, you know what I'm saying at all
the things that we've talked about before.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
But yeah, the anger a lot of the time, Like
I always look at anger like this. I used to
study martial arts a lot.
Speaker 3 (14:55):
One of the worst things you can do is a fighter,
is be angry because the anger blinds you.
Speaker 1 (15:01):
You make you make mistakes.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
You make mistakes, you make moves, you throw punches, you
throw things that you wouldn't do because you angry. And
then you learn how to take a hit and not
get angry from it, and just okay, yeah you got
me on that one. Let's play it. Let's play the game.
You know what I'm saying, because that's what the fight
really is. But initially it's the anger. You know, you
even want to fight anger, you know, h But the
(15:27):
biggest strength is learned how to control the anger in
martial arts. So anger could be a bad thing because,
like I said, you get so angry, you get blinded
by the rage, and you just want to you just
want to, you know, destroy whatever's infuriated you.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
You know what I'm saying. So yeah, anger could be a.
Speaker 3 (15:52):
Definite weakness if not learned how to harness and control.
You mean, look at so many villains, Darth Vader and
Ken Skywalker before he was Darth Vader. You've seen the movies. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
he tried to You got you, bro, don't try to
fight me.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
I'm up here. I got the high ground, bro. It's
over anger and ego and pride, and he lost all
his limbs and was laying in the lot. I'm just saying,
you know what I mean. It be in the movies.
It shown enough.
Speaker 7 (16:25):
It be a lot of signs. It's a lot of
signs in the movies.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Yeah, a lot of truth teaching us ship a lot
of truth. You just be looking at the action. But
it like, damn, he died because of his anger and pride.
Speaker 4 (16:38):
Yeah that's true though, that's true.
Speaker 7 (16:42):
So the next thing is learning to.
Speaker 4 (16:48):
Process your emotions without dumping them.
Speaker 7 (16:52):
A lot of people don't even know what dumping, what
dumping is.
Speaker 4 (16:57):
Coming from. I've been in like therapeutic communities because when
I was in the phase, I started this program call
anger Frustration ventilation. Okay, so what that does. It just
teaches you ways of how to deal with your frustrations,
(17:19):
process your emotions, having self talks with yourself. Yeah, and
learning how learn basically, learning how to process and deal
with life and emotions without dumping. And dumping is a
(17:39):
term that's used paraphrasing. It's basically just like throwing up.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
Yeah, you know.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
What I mean, You're just letting it all out, just
you know what I'm saying. And then when you do that,
it's nine times out of ten it comes out in
a bad way. Stuffing is like Matchine having a chest
on the floor and you just putting all everything in there,
(18:15):
all your toys, everything and there, and you got so
much in there you can't even close the top no more.
So you keep trying to put shit in there. Eventually
pops open. Jack in the box pops open. You know
what I'm saying. So learning learning to process your emotions is.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
For me.
Speaker 4 (18:38):
It was always a struggle because I mean just a
lot of people that I held close to me, Like
I said, Like I said before, a lot of people
are held close to me. Really they stuck the knife
in my side, you know what I mean. You're supposed
to be right here with me, I mean, and both
(19:01):
Like even with the situation with me, with me doing this,
this this thing with Dave's, you wouldn't bro You wouldn't
believe how many people since this situation started has been
like I see the change in people, you know what
I mean? Hm, It ain't even the real money been
exchanged yet or even had yet, you know what I'm saying.
(19:24):
But it's just the possibility that they know what you
know what I mean, And it's like, hmmm, they people
asking ship they asked me for you know what I mean.
I'm just like, just because you see me with dude,
or you see me doing this, that and the third
like that don't mean that, you know what I mean,
we're in that position, you know what I'm saying. And
(19:44):
even if we were, what makes you think, right, Like,
what makes you think that we're there? I had to
ask when I when I answered the phone, I had
to ask.
Speaker 7 (19:55):
Who was this?
Speaker 3 (19:57):
The good thing is they reveal of themselves early. Yeah,
I guess we could look at it that way. That's
one of the best things I've been over the last
few months, over the last year, me having to go
live three four times on people. That's the best thing
I've understood, is they revealing theyself early because these was
people I wanted to give opportunities to a lot of
the time. So that's the best thing about it. But
(20:21):
it's just unfortunate that it even has to come to that,
you know, right, But.
Speaker 1 (20:27):
Yeah, I was taught not to bottle it in.
Speaker 3 (20:32):
I'm very fortunate for my mother teaching me that, you
know what I'm saying. I know, I talk a lot
about my pops being in the penitentiary and my mom's
working a lot, you know what I'm saying, So a
lot of the times I felt, you know, what's going
on retro, felt a little bit of you know, like
(20:55):
like I said before, my grandmother and grandfather raised me
so but but she did teach me lessons. And one
of the lessons that she taught me, and I took
a lot, was not to bottle it all up, you
know what I'm saying, Talk to somebody, talk to me.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
So at least I was able to do that with
my moms, you know what I mean. But a lot
of people don't have that. A lot of people don't
have that.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
And then once you get in to the point of
being older, you know, getting to the point of being
teenage years and really exploring the world on your own,
I think those things change a little bit because some
of the things that you need to talk to someone about,
you might not feel comfortable talking to them about, you
know what I'm saying, because you might feel you're gonna get.
Speaker 1 (21:38):
Into trouble or you're gonna be judged.
Speaker 3 (21:40):
So you talk to it about your peers who talk
to it, about it with your peers who don't know
better than you do. But y'all just figuring it out
the best way y'all can so. But at least I
was able to have that instilled in my mind at
a young age, like don't just stuff it.
Speaker 4 (22:00):
You know what I wish now, bro, I wish that
we didn't look at therapy the way that it was
looked at back in the day, because until I started
going to therapy, I used to think like, well, I
don't need to talk to nobody about nothing.
Speaker 7 (22:15):
But like it was.
Speaker 4 (22:18):
It was helpful, you know, because the stigma back in
the day, if you go see a therapist, it's like,
what's wrong with him? I'm wrong with that motherfucker, you
know what I mean. It was always looked at it
something like bad.
Speaker 7 (22:30):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
Well, it's like it's a misunderstood you know, it's a misunder.
Speaker 4 (22:33):
Because in the hood, nobody's trying to hear your problems. Nah,
nobody's trying to hear that. Yeah, stop whinting, stop complaining it,
man up, deal with it, figure it out.
Speaker 7 (22:42):
That's that's what we was told, right.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
And then shit like you get the time about your
problems and you look over and you see somebody who
got problems ten times worse than your life.
Speaker 7 (22:51):
Man, you know what I'm going through any shit.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
I was just talking.
Speaker 3 (22:55):
About some shit like on my string the other day
and I was like, you know what I'm I don't
even know.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
What I'm talking about. This shit for us people that's
going through like this ain't.
Speaker 4 (23:02):
Nothing, Yeah, you know what I mean. Me and my
lady just had a conversation the other day where her
and I was, you know, basically complaining about some things
that's going wrong.
Speaker 7 (23:13):
And it's nothing major to me.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
It's a major because of what it's gonna cost me
to get it fixed. And you know this, that and
the third right, and she like, look this refrigerator full,
that d freezer full. Every bill has a zero balance,
right right, the mortgage is up to date. Like, were good,
(23:37):
We're good. We'll figure that other shit out right right,
We're good, you know what I'm saying. And she she
I ain't gonna lie, like she make way more money now,
she in the six figures. You know what I'm saying.
Well off into the six figures, I'm just hitting fifty
(23:58):
five sixty. I'm like somewhere around there, right, that's with
the you know, the W two's.
Speaker 7 (24:09):
But yeah, but but.
Speaker 4 (24:13):
She she she did the steps that she had to
do to make sure and and put a plan together
to make sure that you know, look, this is what
we're gonna do to make sure that we are As
long as we stick to this, we're good, right, you
know what I mean. If I didn't have her to
talk to or have her to guide me and basically
be like, calm down, we all right, this is how
(24:35):
we're gonna figure this out, bro, I probably I probably
flip and go just off the handle and just do something,
you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Yeah, yeah, for real, I get it.
Speaker 3 (24:47):
But yo, that's why you got the you know, you
got your wonderful wife in your life, because they be
sent for a reason.
Speaker 1 (24:54):
I say the same thing about sugar Grits. I'd be like,
man if.
Speaker 7 (24:58):
It wants sometimes, but.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
If it wasn't for her, you know, she's just slowed
my life down. I was.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
I was doing a lot, you know, because I was
trying to achieve things, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (25:13):
And that's just the simple fact of the matter.
Speaker 4 (25:15):
But now she's become like a therapist or we become
like a therapist kind of like for each other.
Speaker 3 (25:21):
Yeah, yeah, and that that you know, that's what that's
what a relationship supposed to be. Like you supposed to
be able to talk to your partner about things like that. Nah,
it'd be it'd be some things that is just beyond
your control. And it's like, I really don't know what
to do. You gotta talk to somebody else besides me
about it. But yeah, that's what you post. You know,
(25:41):
if you ain't talking to your partner about the ship
that's going on, I don't even understand what they're there for.
Speaker 4 (25:46):
So so for you, what is the process of processing
your emotions without duping them?
Speaker 7 (25:50):
Look like.
Speaker 3 (25:52):
I just like, uh, silid thinking. If I be an honest,
I just need solitudes so I can process. That's my emotions.
Like when I get to a certain point, I need
to be away from whatever it is. I ain't gotta
go far away, but I just might need to step outside,
take a little walk or something like that. But solitude
(26:13):
is silence is my way to process, Like.
Speaker 1 (26:16):
I think things through.
Speaker 3 (26:18):
I want like another thing my mama told me was
think before you speak, you know what I'm saying, because
words is you know, they sharp.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
So she always told me, think before you speak.
Speaker 3 (26:33):
So I always try to think in process before I
go off the handle and say some shit that's gonna
hurt the person feelings, because I will say some shit
that's gonna hurt the person feelings, and.
Speaker 7 (26:43):
People always remember.
Speaker 4 (26:44):
They may never remember what you do, but they always
gonna remember what you said and how you made them feel.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
Facts.
Speaker 7 (26:51):
They always remember that.
Speaker 1 (26:53):
Yeah, that's real.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
So I try to keep that in mind because I
don't want, you know, I know how to feel if
somebody's say some shit out the way to me. But
at the same time, when I get to the point
of even having to say something, all that tone and
everything is out the window because I've probably said it
quite a few times, you know what I'm saying. So
when I say to the point where you gotta where
I really gotta, you gotta feel me. I'm sorry that
(27:18):
it came out that way or whatever, but you gotta
realize I said it like.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
Five times already might be more right, you know.
Speaker 3 (27:26):
So, But my process is just I just like to
be in solitude, be able to think you know what
I mean.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
In silence alone, and then I could come.
Speaker 3 (27:38):
Back to the situation to talk about it without going
off the handle.
Speaker 4 (27:41):
See me, I'll roll like a couple backwoods up.
Speaker 1 (27:45):
That might be part of the process.
Speaker 4 (27:47):
I get my call, you ride and I ride.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
But do you listen to music or you just ride? Now?
Speaker 7 (27:54):
I listen to music.
Speaker 4 (27:55):
Yeah, see, because the music I put on a certain
I'll put on a certain song got you. And then
I think, yeah, see music probably, but see I don't look.
But see I don't listen to what you think. I'll listen.
Speaker 3 (28:09):
That's what I'm gonna say, though, Like, naw, what when
you said I put on a certain song, I.
Speaker 1 (28:14):
Already know it ain't what you know what I mean? Like,
do you share? Do you care to share a certain song?
Speaker 7 (28:21):
It could be it could be like.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
Neo soul, see what I'm saying, Okay.
Speaker 4 (28:31):
Anything to soothe anything, anything from Tupac Okay, Okay, you
know what I'm saying. Yeah, And I just ride right
And as I'm listening because I'm I'm so familiar with
the with this, with this music, I'm not even really
listening to what they're saying.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
Right, you already got that.
Speaker 4 (28:55):
Yeah, but as I'm riding, I don't even know where
I'm going, but just off muscle memory, I'm hitting, you know.
But by time, by time this bun is done, I
figured it out, or I'm kind of you know what
I'm saying, or I've calmed down, or whatever the case
may be, right, and then that's it.
Speaker 7 (29:17):
But now at this.
Speaker 4 (29:18):
Point, like I can't, I haven't just gotten up gotten
the car, you know, just because I haven't really haven't
had any situations that made me be like that, you
know what I mean. My lady's getting me to the
point where she's like, you know, she wants me to
be more open and vocal and and talk with her more, right,
you know what I'm saying. And I had a problem
(29:39):
with that at first. Not that I had a problem
of speaking with her, It's just that when you're so
used to just having a bottle shit up and deal
with shit the way you've been dealing with it for
so long, and you got somebody telling you, like, no, listen,
you can lean on me, you know what I mean,
it's kind of hard to just jump right into that, right,
I mean.
Speaker 3 (29:58):
Just yeah, when right, way so long?
Speaker 4 (30:03):
Yeah, So it's a learning process for me still even
to this day and we've been together four years, just
to like break down and be like, look, because as men,
we want to figure sit out on our own first
before we even come to you and say this is
what the problem is, right, But with them, it's like, no,
if something's going on, don't stretch yourself about it, tell
(30:26):
me and we can figure it out together. Because it's
like if if men are supposed to be ahead of
the household, if you not right in the house not
right right, or if she not right the house not
right right right, the atmosphere and the vibe is kind
of off, you know what I'm saying. So, yeah, that's
stuff that I've that I'm still learning right to this day.
Speaker 3 (30:49):
Yeah, that's it takes some learning. It takes some learning.
Sugar said, all women want fad, She.
Speaker 7 (30:57):
Said, all women want that.
Speaker 1 (30:58):
Yeah, yeah, I believe that.
Speaker 3 (31:03):
Like I said, I just sometimes when I get to
a point, I just don't want to talk immediately, you
know what I mean. I just need a minute, like
you said, right, figured it out and then you come
back to it.
Speaker 1 (31:13):
But the talk to us happen.
Speaker 3 (31:15):
It's just I need some time, Like especially if I'm
at a certain point.
Speaker 1 (31:19):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (31:21):
But yeah, it's definitely a thing that you have to learn,
you know what I'm saying. You have to learn how
to control your emotions, especially when you're dealing with a
relationship and then you know, your kids and everything like that.
It'll be hard because man, they don't they they don't listen,
Like they just don't listen.
Speaker 1 (31:38):
We don't understand it.
Speaker 3 (31:39):
And so you really got kids and interacting with them,
how much we didn't listen as children.
Speaker 1 (31:45):
They just don't listen. But it's not it's not that
they just they just so caught up.
Speaker 3 (31:49):
In everything that's going on. You know, the focus is
like everywhere. So but yeah, it's just a thing that's tough,
but you learn how to process that. I've learned how
to deal with it over years. Like I said, I'm
a lot better now than I was in my twenties,
because in my twenties I was just spasm.
Speaker 1 (32:07):
I'm I'm a fly off the handle.
Speaker 3 (32:09):
But now, you know, it's like I have to get
to a point that I, you know, yeah, really address it.
It's not that it's bottling it up. It's just that
some things ain't even worth the talk. Or addressing it.
Speaker 4 (32:25):
It's like, okay, so that goes into the next talking point.
Then what are the tools for emotional regulation.
Speaker 3 (32:33):
Well for your own self, like you know they might
be I got a problem with it with emotional regulation.
Speaker 4 (32:41):
Yeah, I ain't like listen.
Speaker 7 (32:45):
Sometimes I man, it's it's with me.
Speaker 4 (32:52):
It's like, because I don't disrespect people, right, I don't
go off. That's just not the vibe with you know
what I mean. I come from a different era with like,
we don't we don't do disrespect, you know what I mean.
And that was even even even like before I went
to the fas back in the day and went to prison,
et cetera, et cetera. But prison is where you learn.
(33:14):
Then people may not understand this, but prison and the
fairs and shit like that, that is where you learn
and will find some of the most respectful people on
this earth, bro, because the men have a respect for
one another and they're like, you don't. It's it's I
don't want to get into it. It's a whole thing.
(33:36):
But it's a lot of respect, you know what I'm saying.
But if if anybody said anything to me, I'm always
quick to go off, like and and it's it's not
it's not coming from a tough guy place and that
it's just from what I've been through, you know what
(33:57):
I mean, and ship that I've survived and was blessed
to come out of, you know what I mean. So
it's like I've never given the person a chance to
even get one up on me.
Speaker 7 (34:09):
I'm not gonna let you do that.
Speaker 4 (34:11):
So if you sit here and get to hollering and
screaming and doing all this, rah rah rah, all right, cool,
you know what I mean, I'm not great do none
of that with you.
Speaker 7 (34:21):
I'm not gonna do none of that.
Speaker 4 (34:23):
And that's always been my mentality, and it's always it's
just always how I played the game right, and it's
got me in trouble a few times, court cases, money
and lawyers and this that and the third. I'm older now,
so I don't even put myself in them type of positions.
I never put myself in the positions then. But it
(34:44):
was just and I can say this because you know
a lot of people say I don't bother nobody, I
don't do nothing, but bro I honestly played the game
fair all the way around the ball. So I never
was the disrespectful dude, you know what I mean. So
anything anything that I've done, and I've always reacted tom
to your action. Like I said, it's there was no
(35:09):
emotional regulation with me.
Speaker 7 (35:11):
You do this, I boomed.
Speaker 4 (35:12):
This is my next thing because I don't want to
do the back and forth. I don't have time to
be beefing with you today to see you next week
and then you want some other ship and then were great,
do this right now? You know what I mean, Avid Goal,
You know what I mean. But I got kids to
live for. I got a family, you know what I'm saying.
I got a lot of stuff now that that even then,
(35:34):
you know what I'm saying. But as you know younger,
you like you don't think about none of that.
Speaker 7 (35:39):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (35:40):
Let's get it popping right now. Worried about none of that.
But as you get older, you know what I mean,
you realize there's more ship than you know to life
and to lose that, you know what I mean. So
you move different, you grow, you know what I'm saying.
You matured, you know what I mean, and then you
try to be the best example you can't for your kids.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
Right.
Speaker 4 (36:01):
So that's why I tell my sons, man, like I've
done all this other shit. That's why I'm trying to
show you something different, you know what I mean. Like
my other son who's in prison now, like I showed
him the map, this is not what you want to do.
He bumped his head and had to go that way, right.
(36:22):
He didn't have emotional regulation, even though I try to
give it to him and show him something. You gotta
learn on your own facts. But he didn't have emotional regulation.
Speaker 3 (36:33):
Yeah, one time, my son he twenty five now, but
he told me once he said it was like when
he was a teen that she was like, I'm telling him,
you know, you don't want to do this, you don't
want to do that.
Speaker 1 (36:47):
He's like, Pops, some people just gotta learn hard. I
was like, well, at least you know, you know what
I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (36:54):
Right right, And fortunately he didn't have to learn too
hard the way you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (37:00):
He had his run hands with the lot and things
like that.
Speaker 4 (37:02):
And for sure enough, and see that's but see, for me,
that was a hard thing. Like happened to see my
son go to trial and lose trial, and he was
on the news and the whole none, you know what
I'm saying. So like, as a father, I felt like
I failed because my job as a father to keep
my sons out of prison and keep my daughter off
(37:23):
the stripple pole. That's my job as a father, you
know what I'm saying. Like for real, that's my job
as a father to keep my sons out of prison,
keep my daughter off a stripple pole. And I feel
like I feel like I lost, I failed in that regard,
you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 7 (37:40):
But I don't know, man, It's just he.
Speaker 4 (37:45):
Was kept from me for so long, so by the
time I was able to connect with him, and you
know what I'm saying, he was already far gone off
into some other ship that I know I could have
deterred him from if I was able to have him,
you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
But the fact that you know, and we spoke about
that before, the fact that you wasn't able to have
him in your presence and you tried, really trying for that. Yeah,
so you have to give yourself some grace, you know
what I'm saying, on how you feel about that, because.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
It's only so much you can do. When the mother
does what they do.
Speaker 3 (38:19):
You know what I'm saying, A lot of the times
as fathers, we were getting to the point where the
system is starting to be more in our favor and
starting to look at the situation.
Speaker 7 (38:31):
Man, listen, they definitely are.
Speaker 4 (38:32):
Because I just went to court Monday, shout out to
Saint Louis County. Got joint custody in my kids. Yeah,
appreciate it. Everything went in my favor. They was talking
about eight hundred and some dollars a month child support.
No serve, We're not doing none of that and all
this or other crap and YadA, YadA YadA. But long
story short, it went just the way I wanted it to.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
That's what's up. Congratulations. Thank you told me something about
that earlier in the week, but since then.
Speaker 4 (38:58):
Right, yep, I'm happy to and for you.
Speaker 3 (39:00):
Appreciate you, because like we go through a lot as fathers,
Like me as a young father and I got married
young and things like that.
Speaker 1 (39:09):
I went through a lot in that situation.
Speaker 3 (39:11):
Yeah you know what I mean, like stuff that live
with me forever, you know, just like this is something
that lives with you regardless. Yeah, you know, hey, I do.
I got to give myself some grace. But still, man, damn,
the what ifs is always there, you know what I mean?
Speaker 4 (39:27):
But uh yeah, yeah, I definitely understand. So it was
a good it was. It was man, it was a
good week. It was a good week. Hell yeah, definitely
a good week. That's what's up.
Speaker 1 (39:39):
But yeah, so.
Speaker 4 (39:42):
It's it's it's I'm learning emotional regulation. I'm learning, bro,
I'm learning. I struggle. I struggle with it because shit,
I just snapped on somebody the other day and my
lady like, it's not that cheerious, you know, it's not
that cheerious, not that serious.
Speaker 7 (39:59):
But to me, it be that.
Speaker 3 (40:01):
Series Like hey, don't get me wrong, I was a target,
like a couple of weeks ago, and I.
Speaker 1 (40:07):
Went to the island.
Speaker 3 (40:08):
This guy came out to island and he like saying
some out the way ship. After I said, excuse me,
you know what I'm saying, respectful, like a real respectful person,
real respectful, like, hey, you know how you doing nice
to everybody? But then when you do some goofy ship,
It's like I've become another.
Speaker 7 (40:28):
Right exactly exactly.
Speaker 3 (40:30):
But she I had looked at him, and my lady
Sugar had seen me. She was like, babe, don't even
worry about it. I was like, you heard me say,
excuse me, right.
Speaker 4 (40:40):
She was like, don't I think I think? I think
my chic being barrassed. Bro, She's like, oh my god,
you did not have to do that.
Speaker 1 (40:49):
And I ain't even take it there.
Speaker 7 (40:50):
I ain't saying nothing real like.
Speaker 1 (40:56):
It was the look. It was exactly that look.
Speaker 4 (40:58):
Like she always She said, why are you looking at
him like that? Like man?
Speaker 7 (41:02):
Because he just see what the he just did, like the.
Speaker 3 (41:09):
But seeing the things that they don't sit to God, bro,
to be things that they don't see that we.
Speaker 4 (41:13):
Do exactly exactly ship that they don't see that we
see it. They be like, oh my god, you did
not have to do that. I'm like, nah, I.
Speaker 1 (41:22):
Did keep this though, but then would it be a
female do it like? And they do?
Speaker 4 (41:29):
Listen, she quickly said, I snatched that bitch ball headed wrong?
What she do?
Speaker 1 (41:36):
Right?
Speaker 4 (41:37):
I saw the beach did look.
Speaker 3 (41:43):
Yeah for real though, right, it'd be like that it's
a double ass sword. But it's just you know, hm,
we we do the best we can in this world.
We come from the city. I come from the city
of Saint Louis. I'm from the south side of Saint Louis.
Your emotions have to be balanced to man.
Speaker 1 (42:03):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (42:03):
Around this motherfucker from any side of the city that
you had, I feel like you got to know how
to you know, because you don't know what the motherfucker
on day today mentally.
Speaker 1 (42:11):
You know what I'm saying, I don't know what they
you know, where they at? You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (42:15):
That's the fact ship, Like we were.
Speaker 1 (42:18):
Just talking about earlier.
Speaker 3 (42:19):
You know, you be sitting up, Damn, I don't know
how I'm gonna do this, and then you look over,
motherfucker got ten times the problems you got. It's like,
let me stop complaining it. So when you're dealing with
a person and you just spass out and you don't
know what they're dealing with. Shit, Just like the girl
this this McDonald's girl, you sink this.
Speaker 1 (42:39):
Shot. Now. She stabbed her. I think she stabbed the
manager or something.
Speaker 3 (42:43):
She said the manager was bullying her, cutting her out,
sending her home.
Speaker 4 (42:47):
And yeah, the little yeah with the little hair, Yeah
she well, she's.
Speaker 1 (42:53):
Got all kind of shit going on. People all over
instag You know she viral.
Speaker 4 (42:58):
Now, right, you know, but mm hmm, now people.
Speaker 3 (43:07):
Want to look at it, you know, now that you
know she already was something going on up there, But
wasn't nobody paying no attention to that?
Speaker 4 (43:15):
M hm, you know. And but they don't never pay
attention till something.
Speaker 1 (43:19):
Happens, until it happened before that they was there. Really, Look,
I didn't know nothing about this girl.
Speaker 3 (43:26):
Apparently she was a rapper and everything, but I ain't
know nothing about it. But now we know because she
ain't know how to regup.
Speaker 7 (43:40):
She could regulate her.
Speaker 3 (43:42):
Emotions and apparently the lady that she killed is nothing
to laugh about.
Speaker 1 (43:46):
The parent. The lady that she killed was a parent
of six.
Speaker 3 (43:50):
Yeah, but so like if the lady was bullying, because
that's just what the girl said on the video before
it happened, Like she the video and then she went back.
Speaker 4 (44:01):
And did it.
Speaker 7 (44:03):
That's premeditated.
Speaker 3 (44:04):
Well on the video, I don't think she said she
was gonna kill her, oh okay, but I think she
did say she was going back. Yeah, but she definitely
was talking about the lady who was bullying and everything
like that. That's it's unfortunate situation. But like, yeah, so
many people we don't have access to therapists and the
(44:25):
proper things that we need.
Speaker 4 (44:27):
But see, they there is access to it. You know,
I many listen, you know how many people That's what
I'm saying. People don't know they you know how many
people are on medicaid. They can go get a therapist medicaid.
But they're just they just don't They don't know, bro,
you know what I'm saying. They people just don't want
to take the time to read ship, look into ship like.
(44:50):
They just don't. Yeah, everybody want instant gratification.
Speaker 1 (44:56):
Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 4 (44:58):
Everybody wants just microwave solution to everything in life, bro,
and shit just don't work like that.
Speaker 7 (45:04):
It just don't as.
Speaker 4 (45:05):
Much as we wanted to this microwave solution ship, it
don't work.
Speaker 1 (45:09):
But it doesn't exist like this too.
Speaker 3 (45:11):
It's a lot of people that don't even think they
need to talk to nobody.
Speaker 1 (45:14):
They don't think they.
Speaker 7 (45:15):
Need and them are the nutcases for real.
Speaker 3 (45:20):
Yeah, well, they living in their reality, you know, they
living in the reality.
Speaker 1 (45:25):
They don't know.
Speaker 7 (45:26):
I don't know, man, I don't know, man, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (45:31):
Motherfucker.
Speaker 4 (45:32):
Cool.
Speaker 3 (45:32):
And they stopped taking their meds for they be a
whole different person.
Speaker 1 (45:35):
They living in the whole different reality. You know.
Speaker 4 (45:39):
Yeah, I guess, man, I guess, Man, I guess. I
ain't even notice that's Nando back there. That is peace, God,
peace sneaking. I ain't even paying attention, respect Homie Nando
on the building. Man, it's Saint Louis Legend. It's Lord, Yeah, man,
it's it's you know. I just I don't know, man,
(46:01):
I know, I know. Loss still working with me, you
know what I mean. That's all I can say, because
I can.
Speaker 7 (46:07):
I can.
Speaker 4 (46:09):
I feel like everybody has a switch, you know what
I'm saying, where all everybody in this room can coexist
with one another, right, you know what I'm saying. But
if you do the right thing, if you do the
right wrong thing, yeah, you're gonna see everybody in this
room change.
Speaker 1 (46:27):
Yeah, for real.
Speaker 7 (46:28):
Everybody in here is going to change. It be somebody
totally different.
Speaker 1 (46:32):
Nah. I was.
Speaker 3 (46:34):
I was in a discord watching like w W yesterday,
and it was a few people in the discord all
watching this, you know, and this person was talking and
they said some wild shit, and the whole mood of
the thing just like changed, like you really said that,
like in this discord, like it was weird, you know
(46:55):
what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (46:55):
The whole atmosphere has.
Speaker 4 (46:56):
Changed, so not on his ass.
Speaker 1 (46:59):
Yeah like you yeah it was.
Speaker 3 (47:02):
It's kind of weird, but it's just like very quickly
can the move change and the atmosphere changes.
Speaker 1 (47:08):
If a person do just the right thing, the right
wrong thing is right, you know exactly, you know? So yeah,
definitely definitely all right.
Speaker 4 (47:19):
So before we get up out of here, man, anything
that I said that it is right, that is, you know,
right and just and exact, that can help anybody that
truly has come from God and one other, no one
other than God, not myself. Anything that I said that
may have been wrong or offended anyone, clearly that is
from myself and my own naps, And I clearly sincerely apologize.
(47:40):
Uh yeah with that.
Speaker 7 (47:42):
You got anything to say before we get up out
of here?
Speaker 1 (47:44):
Man, it is what it is. You mad, be mad
at me? I can't speak for him.
Speaker 4 (47:54):
That's our show man, were up out here out.
Speaker 3 (48:00):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 1 (48:05):
You love shake again, you love shake?
Speaker 2 (48:09):
Yeah, but you're quick. I got my brother come, my cleaning,
my cock tripping from my body, my mother, candy faking
knuckle lot and nothing had never just my love you're taking.
Got my brother, Come leading my colling penick tripping, Come
my body, Come candy fucking knuckle, lot knocking lots, My love,
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark
My Favorite Murder is a true crime comedy podcast hosted by Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark. Each week, Karen and Georgia share compelling true crimes and hometown stories from friends and listeners. Since MFM launched in January of 2016, Karen and Georgia have shared their lifelong interest in true crime and have covered stories of infamous serial killers like the Night Stalker, mysterious cold cases, captivating cults, incredible survivor stories and important events from history like the Tulsa race massacre of 1921. My Favorite Murder is part of the Exactly Right podcast network that provides a platform for bold, creative voices to bring to life provocative, entertaining and relatable stories for audiences everywhere. The Exactly Right roster of podcasts covers a variety of topics including historic true crime, comedic interviews and news, science, pop culture and more. Podcasts on the network include Buried Bones with Kate Winkler Dawson and Paul Holes, That's Messed Up: An SVU Podcast, This Podcast Will Kill You, Bananas and more.
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.