Drama,Disability, and DMs

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Back at it for another episode of The Brock and
I see show. I am your host, see you know,
the official blind step of the Voice of Disableds.

Speaker 2 (00:07):
And I'm in here with Will. So you gotta come
up with a better routine than this.

Speaker 3 (00:12):
You gotta be on point introduction.

Speaker 4 (00:14):
It speaks for yourself. They see me, I'm.

Speaker 3 (00:16):
Hot and I'm on with about that had that hot ship.

Speaker 4 (00:19):
I don't even introduce myself and what they know? What
the fuck I am?

Speaker 1 (00:22):
And we ain't here with the number one producer and
y s no be bigger than ye were in here
with the number one producer of the world. My dog
wolf behind the cameras. See that wolf with the white uncle,
with the white uncle with the slippers on the side.
You got a white girl, don't you yet? You know

(00:44):
we got two sixty five Canal Street where magic happens.
And you running point today because ain't gonna I still
got looking.

Speaker 2 (00:50):
At my sister from my birthday.

Speaker 3 (00:51):
I ain't even gonna hold yo.

Speaker 4 (00:53):
You had a time? How was it?

Speaker 2 (00:55):
I love Diamond the body.

Speaker 4 (00:58):
She was a good time. She's a Gemini and she's
she's full.

Speaker 1 (01:00):
Yeah, her birthday is seventeen, me too, but she's full
of fun, she full of life, and you know, but.

Speaker 2 (01:05):
That's enough that.

Speaker 4 (01:06):
But you better remember my birthday too, since you remember
and people you just met, birthday June seventeenth, nigga or.

Speaker 1 (01:12):
It just said that your birthday is he gonna remember
d TV? Shit, I remember your birthday? Nah, I know, people,
that's seventeen. So we locked in. My mother that's my
mother had weather anniversary, So you locked in.

Speaker 4 (01:22):
Okay, nice?

Speaker 3 (01:23):
You all right?

Speaker 4 (01:24):
So today we just want to come through with a
little bit of advice because it's a lot of people
that always hit me up and I'm sure a lot
of people hit you up about like dating and what
it's like to date while being blind. And what I
was speaking to my lovely brother over here being coach,
was the yeah, you can't be a dating cat because
you're a whore.

Speaker 1 (01:40):
Not a horror. Let's let let's change that narrative. I'm
not a whole no more. I'm thirty five years old. Yeah,
you know, this week I was fucking with the right
one instead of fucking with the right one.

Speaker 4 (01:53):
What okay, break it down, break it down.

Speaker 1 (01:56):
She was the right one because she was in front
of me, so she was the right one. For me
to pursue to have fun with. I don't want the
right one one. I want that right one for me,
So I'm working on with just one.

Speaker 4 (02:08):
Now. That shit didn't make no sense. See that's what men.
That's man explaining ladies and gentlemen.

Speaker 2 (02:12):
He literally just.

Speaker 4 (02:15):
Said some shit. If you were unintellectual, then you would
think he just fits some shiit.

Speaker 3 (02:20):
He just the lines.

Speaker 2 (02:22):
I don't want that right one that's in the say
my eyesight.

Speaker 4 (02:26):
Yeah about say you can't en see niggas, So how
the fuck are you about to say that?

Speaker 1 (02:29):
But that one for me that I'm like, Damn, I
can't you leave. I'm thinking about you that right one
you was?

Speaker 4 (02:33):
That was no See the problem is you're Libra and
you're unbalanced. But we'll get into that another episode because
that's that's We could go all day with that. You're
very unbalanced.

Speaker 2 (02:41):
One woman. I'm a one woman man.

Speaker 4 (02:44):
Fuck, Okay, you're gonna ruin this whole episode because the
we're gonna divis you not but okay. So basically a
lot of people that were born with the disability are
more confident within dating because that's the only way they've
ever known. Most of us who developed the disability as
we age you got older, whether it be an injury,
whether something happened within your health and change it. A

(03:05):
lot of people lack the confidence to go back out
on a dating scene because they feel like, who's gonna
want them? You know what I'm saying. Did you ever
have those feelings when you first became blind?

Speaker 2 (03:13):
Nope? I still was outside.

Speaker 4 (03:15):
So how soon did you get back into having like
dating relations.

Speaker 1 (03:19):
Well, I can't because I got shot. I came home
to a relationship.

Speaker 4 (03:22):
Oh he was already in one though. No, so what
you mean you came home to a relationship.

Speaker 2 (03:27):
I got shot.

Speaker 1 (03:28):
I was on my bad coming off my deathbed to
you are the one for me. I want to spend
the rest of my life with you.

Speaker 2 (03:34):
Like, and which young lady, was this the love of
my life?

Speaker 4 (03:39):
Not the right one?

Speaker 2 (03:40):
No, she's the right one for me. She's the right
one for me.

Speaker 4 (03:44):
Not your baby mama. No, Oh that's terrible. How that's terrible?
Because how old was your son?

Speaker 2 (03:50):
Was one?

Speaker 4 (03:51):
Okay, so that's terrible.

Speaker 2 (03:52):
How that's terrible.

Speaker 4 (03:53):
How how did you come home in a relationship? You
would have got shot in the head again.

Speaker 3 (04:00):
Away it was It's like.

Speaker 2 (04:03):
People it's allowed to separate.

Speaker 4 (04:07):
Right, Nigga? That girl was fresh out of postpart and
that's a one year.

Speaker 2 (04:11):
Old baby, wasn't?

Speaker 4 (04:14):
Who was at the hospital?

Speaker 3 (04:16):
Everybody?

Speaker 4 (04:17):
How many people's? Everybody I'm talking about talking about young
talk about women?

Speaker 3 (04:20):
Oh you had oo?

Speaker 2 (04:22):
They call me super yo. No life was girl? That
that was never my girl? Sayn was my girl?

Speaker 4 (04:26):
Okay, so you just was a male jigglow.

Speaker 2 (04:30):
I was in the best years of my life. I
was outside.

Speaker 4 (04:32):
How old were you?

Speaker 2 (04:33):
Twenty one?

Speaker 3 (04:34):
Oh?

Speaker 4 (04:34):
Twenty one? Yeah, that explains that I'm in.

Speaker 1 (04:36):
The best years of my life. Like I'm being a whole.
But then I got shot. It's like damn, Like they
knew I was blind before I knew I was blind,
so they could everybody starts.

Speaker 4 (04:46):
Hey story, stop the alarm.

Speaker 3 (04:50):
So that was your home? Yeah you talked about president. Yeah,
oh you gotta teach me that.

Speaker 2 (04:56):
See, I ain't an advanced like that.

Speaker 3 (04:58):
I ain't advanced like that.

Speaker 4 (05:00):
What I got you, bro? I thought, yes, Syrien would
have been immaculate. I didn't know.

Speaker 3 (05:04):
I ain't know.

Speaker 4 (05:04):
I your your sirih be finding out who she and
this ship?

Speaker 3 (05:10):
I don't know. It was better we even do the
cheating too.

Speaker 1 (05:14):
But where everybody started like fading away, but curse she
she rocked out.

Speaker 4 (05:19):
She stayed with the right one.

Speaker 2 (05:20):
Yeah, the right one for me. No, you got to
take the right one for me. It's the right one
for you. Yeah, okay, she and I know it was real.

Speaker 1 (05:27):
When she washed my ass when I was in the
I said, nah, she's the one for me.

Speaker 4 (05:30):
She watched when I was in the hospital, and.

Speaker 2 (05:32):
I was in the hospital, I washed my ass.

Speaker 4 (05:34):
But that's kind of fun up because you can still
watch your glass.

Speaker 2 (05:36):
I was fucked up.

Speaker 4 (05:37):
How you couldn't watch your ass.

Speaker 2 (05:38):
I was weak. I couldn't move my right on my
right one was dad barely walk and everything.

Speaker 3 (05:43):
A little parent. I lost a lot of you couldn't see.

Speaker 2 (05:45):
I wasn't like you.

Speaker 3 (05:47):
I wasn't like you. I still cold. Butterfly wasn't thank you.
Like this ship, Claire, you know he always going to
do it. I'm still doing the hillte I would.

Speaker 4 (05:57):
I was watching my ass in the hospital, so I.

Speaker 3 (05:59):
Can't really try to put that disability on me.

Speaker 1 (06:01):
Baby.

Speaker 2 (06:03):
I mean, she was washing me up, she was feeding me,
she was doing it all.

Speaker 1 (06:06):
She was the right one for me. It just when
I came home. I still wasn't over that past life.
I still wanted to be in a mix. I still
wanted different women. I still want to live life running
streets when I was wasting her time.

Speaker 4 (06:22):
So you knew you were wasting her time, even as
a blind man. It's a possible. It's possible to be
a piece of shit. Guys.

Speaker 2 (06:27):
No, no, no, no, no, it's not. It's not like that.

Speaker 4 (06:30):
It's like, no, that's exactly what it's like. It's like,
she's my piece, she's but were you her piece?

Speaker 2 (06:36):
Yes?

Speaker 1 (06:37):
I was, but I wasn't living up to the standards
I was supposed to. And in the sense of like,
oh my god.

Speaker 4 (06:44):
Oh god, no, because I really want you to hear
yourself because.

Speaker 2 (06:47):
I understand that I know what I'm saying. It sound crazy.
I had the one.

Speaker 4 (06:51):
I want you to hear yourself, because how can one
be some How can she be your piece and you
not be hers? But she's the right one because.

Speaker 2 (07:01):
I was running essential her piece.

Speaker 1 (07:02):
I was running away from the bigger like I run
away from problems.

Speaker 4 (07:07):
You feel like your trauma's got in the way of that.

Speaker 1 (07:09):
Yeah, because like she she was the one for me.
She was perfect everything I needed. She was there for me.
I never felt alone when she was around. Even when
she wasn't there, I didn't feel alone because she always
made her presence known to me. But I just couldn't
get over the fact that, damn, my life is changed.
So I was running in the streets trying to fuck
with different girls to try to see if I'm still seeing.

Speaker 4 (07:31):
Oh, so you was trying to figure yourself out.

Speaker 1 (07:33):
Yeah, that's what it was. I was an adult and
couldn't handle the dog. So it's like I felt if.

Speaker 4 (07:38):
I'm joking to somebody else in there with you.

Speaker 2 (07:41):
Yeah, you feel me like she like I was trying
to come out.

Speaker 1 (07:43):
She was trying to pull herself in, so she was
trying to understand what I was going through when.

Speaker 2 (07:48):
It's like, it's no understanding, understand no understanding that you
feel me? Yeah? Sorry.

Speaker 5 (07:53):
There are white people in the other room that are
complaining about our magnetic black energy. So if y'all can
just keep your black happiness to a to a low volume. No,
if you can't keep your black happiness to a low
volume because the white people on the other side of
the room, apparently I don't know. Sorry, Sorry, I even
got to say that. But that's just that's that's what

(08:14):
I heard.

Speaker 2 (08:15):
From the token nigga came and talked to me and
let okay, master, how.

Speaker 4 (08:19):
Do we even do the episode without our black happiness?
What would they like us to do?

Speaker 5 (08:25):
They like to keep it. I guess it's coming coming.
Maybe bring the volume down, the volume.

Speaker 2 (08:31):
So the value. Pump up the value already.

Speaker 4 (08:34):
Okay, so now we're doing as Mr. Yeah, you know
we need that other black nigga that was here last
really humble those people the fun. We all paying the
same way, all right, peace out? Hello, we chilling. I'm
not the black motherfucker.

Speaker 3 (08:48):
I'm not.

Speaker 4 (08:49):
I'm not the one to do this. Yeah, so you know,
saying again, sorry, we just fucked up.

Speaker 3 (08:56):
We're gonna get back.

Speaker 1 (08:58):
But yeah, so it was, Yeah, she was trying to
come to the dog, trying to understand me.

Speaker 2 (09:03):
I went, I didn't want her in the dock. So
what I was doing, I.

Speaker 1 (09:06):
Was still running the streets, trying to be seen, No,
dealing with different girls and all that. And I'm gonna
be honest, dealing with the different girls that not make
me happy. I was at the end of the day,
I'm still in the dark. I'm still blind, I'm still
fucked up. But at the end of the night, who's
there rubbing my back, who's there holding me?

Speaker 2 (09:22):
It was hard?

Speaker 1 (09:23):
So therefore it's like I fucked her over for not
even pleasure to myself, just to try to prove I'm somebody.

Speaker 4 (09:32):
Because you wanted to still feel like your old stop
wanted to feel like I was still seeing them, not
realizing that it's it's a rebirth, you're a new person.

Speaker 1 (09:39):
I felt like because when I lost my sight, I
felt like I lost everything. So my biggest thing is
I got it. My name got it, stayed in my name, Like, yeah,
so who will seeing the cars, the clothes, the females moving,
So it's like I can't drive, I got somebody else
dressing me. The one thing I can't lose is me
being a ladies man.

Speaker 4 (09:59):
Is like, so you did that more for an image
rather than just.

Speaker 1 (10:03):
To try to I felt that's who I was, when
really that shit don't mean nothing to me. The clothes
don't mean nothing to me. The thousand dollar pans and
all that shit don't mean nothing to me no more.
The car don't mean none to me. I'll take a
sets her ride. You don't mean that to me no more.
I lost who I was when I got shot. The
whole time when she was reminded me like you bigger
than everything you feel.

Speaker 2 (10:23):
You missing, and I lost stuff.

Speaker 1 (10:25):
She fought with me for two years to try to
like stick around, like, let me see if he gonna
phase out of this.

Speaker 2 (10:30):
I didn't, so she couldn't do it no more. So
she did.

Speaker 4 (10:33):
So this is the right one for you.

Speaker 2 (10:34):
She the right one for me. I'm still fighting.

Speaker 4 (10:36):
Okay.

Speaker 2 (10:36):
So thirteen years later, a lot of.

Speaker 4 (10:40):
People, like you just said, struggle with an identity crisis.
And when you're having an identity crisis, it's not safe
to date anyone because you don't even know yourself. So
how do you know who you like? How do you
know what you're gonna like? How do you know? You
don't know anything. If you don't know yourself, you don't
know shit, you know what I'm saying. So a lot
of people, whether you're even if you're a lot of

(11:01):
able body people don't know who the fuck they are,
so then it hinders their relationship because now you're getting
with someone based on who you are on that day,
not even knowing that's not who you're going to be tomorrow,
maybe not even next week, or you know what I'm saying, that's.

Speaker 2 (11:12):
Not who you are.

Speaker 4 (11:14):
So aren't able to date, whether you have a disability
or whether you don't. And a lot of people don't,
you know what I'm saying. So it's like that's why
a lot of relationships fail, period.

Speaker 2 (11:23):
And disability to it. You gotta love yourself.

Speaker 1 (11:25):
You can't look for you can't look for someone to
love you, to show you what love is.

Speaker 4 (11:29):
You gotta love yourself exactly with the disability. And a
lot of people don't love themselves with their disability. A
lot of people live in the past. A lot of
people don't even take pictures of themselves when they're disabled
because they don't want to see themselves. They can't see
themselves like that. They don't want people to see themselves
like that. A lot of people wither away, lock themselves
in the house, get high, get drunk, od on pills,

(11:50):
take up, you know, just stay inside and get fat, big, skinny.

Speaker 2 (11:53):
Whatever they do.

Speaker 4 (11:54):
It's like it's a it's a word that people use,
but it's like suicide, you know what I mean. But
it's like you're not directly killing yourself. But you're trying slowly,
You're you're okay with you going. You're slowly killing yourself
just because you no longer want to be here anymore,
because you're not okay with who you have become in
this moment.

Speaker 1 (12:12):
I used to walk around with hoodies on because I
didn't want people look at me. That's craz It could
be hot as hell. I got a hoodie on and
they're like, what's wrong? Like people think I'm scared of
what happened. I'm not scared like you just thought.

Speaker 2 (12:23):
I just don't. I feel like the world just looking
at me.

Speaker 4 (12:25):
So it's like to me, because you can see, you
feel like everybody's.

Speaker 1 (12:29):
Everybody's staring at me. And then when I learned I
had to learn how to walk with the stick. That
was the hardest.

Speaker 4 (12:34):
Well you just thought of using that damn stick.

Speaker 1 (12:36):
No, I just started, but I learned it when I
first went blind. Yeah, but when I was walking with
the lady, like she teaches me how to do it
and I'm just walking and it's like everything just went
darne for me even more. I'm walking past, I'm putting
my hoodie on. She said, why you got your head down? Oh,
I don't want people to look at me. So why
did you feel people looking at you make you more disable?

(12:59):
And then I looked I threw the stick. I said
this over said wait, how are you gonna get back
to the house. I felt on the game walk all
the way back to the house until I got to
my building. When the shay, yo, if you could do that,
you could use this stick.

Speaker 2 (13:09):
I'm like, nah, I can't.

Speaker 1 (13:11):
People walking like damn, it ain't the same love that
I once got one when I couldn't see. What I
could see now when they see me with the stick
is like they patted me on my back like the
old people give you them packs on the back.

Speaker 2 (13:23):
They patted me on my back like you're doing a
good job.

Speaker 4 (13:26):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (13:26):
Nah, this ain't my life.

Speaker 4 (13:27):
Man.

Speaker 2 (13:27):
I'm like, I'm turning back around.

Speaker 1 (13:29):
But now they're like, yo, that's why I came up
with the They're like, where your stick at?

Speaker 2 (13:32):
It on? Match with my clothes? Nah? I said that
because I was hiring from it.

Speaker 4 (13:37):
So the first point would be because I'm running point right,
you run the point, but take this into then go
to pivot your ass back. The first point were obviously
first accepting yourself accepting who you are now. So if
you haven't gotten to that point yet, it makes no
sense to date because then people are going to see that,
and a lot of people, anybody that's there for the
real reason, the right reason, they're going to get turned
off by that, and they're not going to want to stay.

(13:59):
You know what I'm say, They're gonna say, like, who
is this?

Speaker 3 (14:01):
Sorry?

Speaker 4 (14:02):
Motherfucker. You're gonna make people discike it because it's gonna
be those anger moments. It's gonna be those why me moments.
It's gonna be those self pity moments, and not everybody
feels sorry for you. No, I didn't feel those moments
because I was just so convinced on getting back into
my regular life that I never took the time to
really fully sit there and heal. I started doing healing

(14:24):
in my older age, you know what I mean, Like
after I became a mom, I feel like I started
healing because I'm now in charge of someone else's life.
And that was seven years and I started after. But
your your son was already born prior to you being blind,
So it's like you got to even if it was
for a brief moment, you got to experience him. You

(14:45):
know what I'm saying with your site, I've never got
to experience my son with my legs. Well I have
with my mobility. You know, No, that's here.

Speaker 3 (14:55):
This cheer is just the But I get it.

Speaker 2 (14:57):
But it's like.

Speaker 1 (15:00):
I got taken out prime time of my son. So
it's like we just started going to the park, pushing
on the swings. He wanted to go down slides and
all that. So admit of that at my sight, But.

Speaker 4 (15:10):
Imagine never having that opportunity, imagine never having that seat.
It's a difference because even if I got that, even
if I got a couple of months to work with
my son, you know what I'm saying, that'll be that's
different than never happened.

Speaker 2 (15:22):
It still won't make it happy.

Speaker 1 (15:24):
Yeah, my son, my son fifteen, my son fourteen years old,
Dahn fourteen, fifteen years old.

Speaker 4 (15:30):
Fourteen years You can't count my son fourteen.

Speaker 2 (15:33):
Years old and say he was one when you guys
fourteen fourteen, My so fourteen years old.

Speaker 1 (15:39):
I'm still as still didn't heal from it, Still don't
heal from it.

Speaker 2 (15:42):
Yeah, so much, I see my son.

Speaker 4 (15:44):
I guess that's that's and that's the difference because we
always look at it like, okay, So for I remember
Smart he said something on a podcast and he was like,
to the motherfucker that's blonde. You get what I'm saying.
He says something about paralyzed. You know what I'm saying.
They just would shake a walk and pray, so they
never go to hell like focus, you know what I mean,

(16:04):
So you don't focus on and stuff like that. And
it's like, whereas I'm sitting here like I never got
to walk with my son, you're saying you never got
to see your son. And those are two incomparable things
because both of them are tragedies, you know what I mean,
And nobody would want to take one of the other,
you know. So I can't sit there and say, like,
you know, you're you're right, your your feelings are valid.
They honestly are valid. But it's important to I don't know.

(16:27):
He's old as hell and he's been injured for very
very many years.

Speaker 2 (16:30):
So you've been longer than me. Let's get yet.

Speaker 4 (16:33):
But I've been just one year before. Yeah, you know
you got injured in twenty twelve or twelve, Yeah, so
mine's twenty eleven. Shut the fudge, up.

Speaker 3 (16:43):
But you're old.

Speaker 4 (16:44):
I'm not even I'm not even thirty yet.

Speaker 1 (16:48):
Old word the wine get old, don't age, well, right,
that just works right, I'm wine, baby, Oh my god,
I'm wine. You can't find me in a liquor store.

Speaker 3 (16:57):
Baby.

Speaker 2 (16:57):
You would rink don Julio.

Speaker 4 (17:01):
You drink down Julio and Triple.

Speaker 2 (17:05):
Taylor. Technically is that of my system? I ain't doing
it no more.

Speaker 4 (17:08):
You ain't doing what you're about to go to Houston.

Speaker 2 (17:12):
Don't tell my business?

Speaker 4 (17:15):
Yeah business, yeah, okay, sorry, I guess, but I drink water.
He drinks water, he eats fruits, and he works out.
But either way, a lot of people. Then there's the
people that get with people and they know these people
don't want them, you know what I'm saying, Like the
disabled people that know people are using them like they're
giving them money and did it.

Speaker 3 (17:35):
I'm sorry.

Speaker 4 (17:36):
I don't run deep enough to be tricked on.

Speaker 1 (17:38):
Nobody just for company. People just want I can't. I
can't have brothers and sisters and family that gave me
the company.

Speaker 4 (17:44):
I can't do it and even its.

Speaker 2 (17:49):
People it right, because I ain't lie.

Speaker 1 (17:51):
Some like it's days that when she left me at night,
I was lonely, and that room no life, felt like
that room was closing into me. And that's when I realized, like, damn,
how valuable and how much I appreciated being that she's
going Now to a point, you'll call anybody over just
to satisfy that needs when you.

Speaker 2 (18:09):
Really don't want to be next to that person. You
don't want to hold this person, so don't.

Speaker 4 (18:12):
That's the part of healing, because I'd rather be alone
and loving myself than with someone that doesn't love me.
And a lot of people with disabilities, a lot of
people with disabilities choose to be with someone that doesn't
love them just so they don't have to fill along,
just so they could feel normal again. It's nothing normal
about being with someone who doesn't love you, who uses you.
If that's the case, just be a trick and have
a different person to get better every night rather than

(18:32):
the same old, boring shit. You're gonna get tired of
it the fuck. I'd rather pay for a different meal
every day than that pay and have.

Speaker 3 (18:38):
The same every night.

Speaker 2 (18:39):
It's definitely not worth it because do what y'all do.
Have fun.

Speaker 4 (18:42):
But and then that person is outside, whether it be
a female or meal they outside doing Dixon pussies, some
of them doing both, and then they coming home back
to you laying up, giving you that energy, putting up
in diseases, and then you just in it crying. I
had a friend and he was being abused in his
own home because he's disabled, you know what I'm saying.
He was being abusing his own home by female, by
his woman. By the female, not necessarily like she was

(19:05):
eating on him, but it's disabled abuse when you're taking advantage,
when you're moving people in. She had the man that
she got pregnant by coming to the house to get
his stuff, you know what I mean, all types of stuff.
He was threatening him, all types of things just because
he chose to pay. Yeah, he's in a wheelchair. He
chose to pay the play, and you know that this
person doesn't love you, and then you start developing all

(19:25):
these feelings and then after a while to start, you're
willing to give everything, everything, everythinguntil it's nothing left of yourself.

Speaker 2 (19:31):
Yeah, I ain't playing to play, I ain't gonna lote
social Security.

Speaker 4 (19:33):
Can't said that is not enough. I don't know why
y'all be doing it.

Speaker 2 (19:37):
For real, Like I just took a good one, it's
not enough.

Speaker 4 (19:40):
And then on top of that, so say, if you're
not giving them any money, but maybe you're giving them shelter,
you know what I'm saying, or maybe you're giving them
the feeling of just a lot of people date people
with disabilities to feel better about themselves because.

Speaker 2 (19:51):
They like they've done something in the world, because they.

Speaker 4 (19:53):
Feel like they're the prize in that relationship.

Speaker 1 (19:55):
I had somebody like that when you were dating or not.
After she left me, I started people on it. It
felt like I was like a charity case.

Speaker 2 (20:03):
Like were walking around.

Speaker 1 (20:04):
It's like you flaunt me like a trophy, like you
looking out, don't leave him, staying by him, this, that,
and the third. And I'm looking like, I don't know
what you're telling these people, but you can't really do
ship for me, like like.

Speaker 2 (20:16):
Oh, you're making it seem like you dressed me and.

Speaker 4 (20:18):
Do all this like yeah, and I'm like yo, like
I'm you're not my seeing that dog like let's make it.

Speaker 1 (20:26):
I'm standing next to you, not standing behind you. That's
really like we're not doing that. And again by standing
behind you, I'm standing next to you. And she got
off on that, but she felt like she was doing
something for me. I jumping that out of cause myself.
I'm not so what you what you were really telling
these people because you you're not.

Speaker 2 (20:45):
Relationship making like she's doing it.

Speaker 1 (20:48):
Oh no, even you putting a video like you playing
ketchup on my my frids, Like come on, it's like
a charity case style.

Speaker 2 (20:58):
You're doing it for the views.

Speaker 1 (20:59):
You're doing it for the light in the I'm not
doing it, don't. It's it's some people know cap I
don't speak to the whole gear. But when I got shot,
he put up that long post. I remember I talked
to you on the phone. Then they put up their
screenshots and all that of text messages. Yo, let's put
up the rail messages that I didn't speak to you
and gard news winning. So why what you're doing You're

(21:20):
doing it for the views, You're doing it for the lights.
My birthday, come y'all couldn't after what works, everybody wants
to be there with every.

Speaker 2 (21:26):
Everybody want to put it.

Speaker 1 (21:27):
It's people in the club like I'm vibing, I'm dancing,
you putting your arms around me to get a selfie.

Speaker 3 (21:32):
It ain't that time for that.

Speaker 2 (21:34):
Why because after my birthday. Aint gonna see you again
to the next year. I don't want that. And it's females,
it's like, nah, you just show you we're not doing that.
Why you acting boojit like y'all just don't want no picture.
It's over. You're gonna put this picture up in front
for who?

Speaker 4 (21:47):
For what?

Speaker 2 (21:48):
Not not mean, I ain't no charity case.

Speaker 4 (21:49):
So he just said a whole another reason people are
doing it for a child, for the cloud, for the cloud. Yeah,
because you can get a lot of views and likes,
and you get other people. It's the same way when
you take it when a dad takes a baby outside
and the women want them, you know what I mean.
Now she got there. Now they see, oh he's a
good man. But now if they see this woman, Oh
she's with this disabled gun and she's taking care of him.
Or they see this man with this disabled woman, he's

(22:11):
taking care of her. Oh he's a good man. Oh
she must be a good woman. Not knowing that they're
just doing it for their own incentives.

Speaker 2 (22:16):
That's all it is. That's all it be.

Speaker 3 (22:17):
For see.

Speaker 4 (22:18):
I've I can't say I've experienced that. I've had probably
one ex maybe where I can say that his name is.

Speaker 3 (22:27):
You know, I'm not gonna do that.

Speaker 4 (22:28):
I would do it, but I don't want to give
anybody no atention because I really don't feel no way.

Speaker 2 (22:33):
I don't nobody.

Speaker 4 (22:34):
I don't feel no type of way towards none of
my exes. But when I first got injured, it was
this boy because I'm popular, you know what I mean.
Where I'm from Queens, everybody knows same way. Everybody know
who he is in Brooklyn, I'm saying, but everybody know
who I am where I'm at, and I had this boy.
It was a bunch of people in my DMS when
I got injured. First of all, I had two boyfriends.
When I got shot. My dad played defense for me

(22:55):
because they was trying to come into the hospital at
the same time. But you know, I finished, I finised
their real and I let go a good one. God,
why you know, I'm playing because I'm in love now.
But at the time, just going through all the extra
stress with that other person was just too much. But
so I came home, and I came home to a
relationship because I met this boy online and we were
just talking, talking, talking, and he was actually pretty cool.

(23:18):
But then as I look at it, I'm like, what's
he with me for? Cloud? I mean, it wasn't no
money or nothing, you know what I mean, but just
to like be posted and just to say I'm his
ex and stuff like that because he's still to this day,
oh oh we used to do do not claim me.
I'm lying to none of that. And all the other
exes I will say they were there for just you know,

(23:39):
same way you get with somebody is just a regular relationship.
So I can't really say I've been in those type
of predicaments because I won't allow myself to because I
don't even play with niggas like that. Like before the chair,
I was a demon. So it's like I'm glad that
I turned into an angel right now, but it's like
I'm still a gem and I could really just a demonship. No, no, no,

(23:59):
see that's the thing. No, that's the thing. When I
went through something, I was in an on and off
again relationship with someone for six years, you know what
I'm saying. So being on and off with someone for
that many years it does something to you. And then
on top of that, I've never had a child or
anyone before, so that made it harder because it's like
my emotions were more invested because I've never wanted I

(24:20):
don't come from a broken home. My parents were married,
you know what I'm saying. Like I don't have siblings,
well they're out of well luck. But it's like my
father got remarried, my mother got remarried, you know what
I mean. So it's like my siblings are like me
and my brother. We have the same mother and father marriage,
you know what I'm saying. Then the rest of my
siblings mom father married.

Speaker 2 (24:37):
So you stuck around the bullshit just to follow that.

Speaker 4 (24:39):
I just didn't want to broken home for my child,
not realizing that I was breaking myself, saying, so I
broke myself trying to create a healthy home and not
realizing my child didn't even want it.

Speaker 2 (24:50):
Sometimes they'd be bad for the child.

Speaker 4 (24:52):
To my child didn't even want it. He doesn't care
at all. He wants to see me happy.

Speaker 2 (24:56):
And I know I gotta give your credit for that too.
But you want hell of the ship you do?

Speaker 1 (25:01):
No, Lie, I said, I see a lot of women
out here and how they move their kids and this
that I'm about to say.

Speaker 2 (25:08):
This they need to be disabled.

Speaker 1 (25:10):
No Lie, that the way I disabledness works with me
and my son and you and your son. It's like
I see people when I'm like, yo, nigga, I leave
out and I think about my son when I'm in.

Speaker 2 (25:20):
A club talking to these females.

Speaker 3 (25:21):
Literally, that's who.

Speaker 4 (25:22):
Want to I'm rushing to here from just dropping him
from school. When I get out of here, I got
to go to a meeting for his school too.

Speaker 2 (25:29):
So it's just like it's in and out when it comes.

Speaker 4 (25:31):
Because I've always wanted to be a mom, you know,
So I say that on every podcast I get the chance,
and we're gonna have our kids watch that. But I've
always wanted to be a mom, So I don't take
it for granted. But just to get back on I
appreciate the compliment, but just to get back on tasks.
It's just you know, when you get and that just
shows like people will look at it like, oh, this
happened because of my disability. No, that happened because I

(25:53):
allowed it, you know what I'm saying. So stop blaming
your disability and stop start saying what you allowed. I
know this guy, he has no legs, no arms, he's
limbed different, and he's married to a rich man doing makeup.

Speaker 3 (26:05):
He's going viral.

Speaker 4 (26:06):
I'm telling you, I don't know his name. Yeah, he's
whatever his sexualize, yeah I believe. So I don't know
if he's a day then, but I know he's amazing
and he's happy, and he doesn't allow him. You know
what I'm saying. Imagine someone with no limbs, no arms,
no legs, you know what I'm saying, still found still
find love. People sit there, they target him and everything,
but his husband still does still loves him and stays
standing by each other. You know what I'm saying. So

(26:27):
it's really up to you. There's people that can't feel
below their neck that's still find love. You know what
I'm saying. It's people that are deaf. Two deaf people
be in relationships, still in love, you know what I'm saying.
Two people in wheelchairs still in love. Two blonde people
still in love, you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 3 (26:40):
So it's really just your choice.

Speaker 4 (26:41):
And then there's people that are able body, fully capable,
no disabilities, no hearing and pairing, no visual appearance, nothing,
and they still don't have a relationship or still unhappy.
They and they're just unhappy and they're just saying, so
stop blaming your disability and start blaming yourself. Starts saying,
why am I allowing myself to wallow him self pity
so that no one loves me? Why am I allowing
myself to be used by someone that doesn't love me?

Speaker 2 (27:02):
Why am I allowing.

Speaker 4 (27:03):
Myself to be used as a charity case just to
prove that someone loves me? You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 (27:07):
And if you find love too, don't fuck it over
just to be in alert with the rest of the
miserable people like that ship is.

Speaker 2 (27:14):
Not worth it.

Speaker 1 (27:14):
You hurting people just just to be happy that you
keeping an image that ship is conny. I hurt the
woman in my life and I regret that shit every time, like.

Speaker 3 (27:24):
Even And this is why you were blind? Yeah, and
you cheated right about because this is big. This is big.

Speaker 4 (27:31):
This is what I wanted to get a woman on
his face because you seated because you could be blind
and still but it's a ship.

Speaker 1 (27:39):
This with me and Hu, me and her was rocking
with each other. I never physically stuck my ship and
nobody it's the fact of the thrill of talking to
the female that's cheating.

Speaker 2 (27:48):
Yeah, it is talking to.

Speaker 4 (27:50):
Someone is cheating, established that shirting when someone is cheating,
you needed to talk to someone.

Speaker 3 (27:54):
To establish that.

Speaker 2 (27:55):
Yeah, I said, man, we'll established that.

Speaker 4 (27:57):
But you have when you was talking to these women,
did you have intentions of fu?

Speaker 1 (28:02):
Oh, it's just to me to feel like I'm still
seeing it wasn't like she she satisfied me every way possible.

Speaker 4 (28:09):
But I just you self sabotaged you self sabotage for now.

Speaker 2 (28:12):
Yeah, I self sabotaged myself image.

Speaker 3 (28:14):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (28:14):
And then when she left and I realized it wasn't
worth it, because like, what the fuck is these women doing?
She wasn't one of the name Tani shout out to
tany we need you back. I'm working every day the
right one. She's the right one for me.

Speaker 2 (28:29):
You know what it is. It's like like she let
me be me so she wasn't she did. She didn't
do it for no charity case. She didn't do anything.

Speaker 4 (28:36):
Did she ever make you feel the table? Hell no,
she treated you.

Speaker 2 (28:39):
Get out the car, take these bags, like, come on,
like you can hang this pitch up. She did it all.

Speaker 3 (28:44):
She made me a lot.

Speaker 1 (28:46):
I wouldn't be wha I am today if it wasn't
I could honestly speak that ship because now when she
left me, I realized I had to do everything that
she was doing for me by myself.

Speaker 4 (28:54):
And then you realized how much that woman I got shot.

Speaker 2 (28:58):
She was encouraged me to use my stick. Now look
at me. It was with my stick. She was encouraging
me to talk about what I'm going through. Now look
at me.

Speaker 1 (29:05):
I'm on the podcast talk about what I'm going through.
Like I hid myself from the world.

Speaker 2 (29:11):
But she knew the real me.

Speaker 1 (29:12):
I used to be outside talking, talking, popping my shit,
but then when I go in the room, I'm crying
and vulnerable, and she did rubbing my back, like yo,
stop trying to pretend to be something that you really
not no more. And I used to flip out on
her like yo, stop, like stop, because I felt like,
see knows everything.

Speaker 2 (29:27):
Thron't mean shit, It's just a name now Chris, I ain't.

Speaker 1 (29:32):
I ain't scared to say, yo, I'm sorry, I apologize
this not there. And in the midst of all of that,
I was a monster to her, and it's like she's
the only one that was there for me.

Speaker 3 (29:42):
I got shot.

Speaker 1 (29:42):
She never left my side from the respirate up. I'm
on machine. Just beat be beat and she's standing right
there next to me. Took off work and like, I
shit it on her.

Speaker 2 (29:51):
I fucked he over.

Speaker 1 (29:52):
I didn't care about her feelings. I was like, why
I came about your feelings when it's all about me?

Speaker 2 (29:57):
I was self fish. Now, No, I ain't, ain't, I ain't.

Speaker 3 (30:01):
I get that back.

Speaker 2 (30:02):
It's over see, I gotta protect her. I didn't protect them.

Speaker 4 (30:05):
Oh man, that's accountability right there, and a lot of
men don't do that. And the fact that you said
something big. I didn't protect her, And that's what a
lot of relationships lack these days. It's protection of your spouse,
not just your own emotions, because a lot of the
times we are dating with self centeredness when we date
just to protect our own emotions because we don't want
to get hurt. And that's why a lot of people
have a side chick, a side nigga too. You know

(30:26):
what I'm saying, Just a bunch of guy people.

Speaker 2 (30:28):
So it don't even make you feel good.

Speaker 4 (30:29):
Because you want to feel protected, but you're not protecting
your partner. Maybe if we if we focus more on
protecting our partner than protecting ourselves. Maybe our partner. It'll
be our partner's job to protect us while we protect them,
and then we can protect each other.

Speaker 1 (30:40):
And she was protecting me, and I went to protect her,
like even when sh didn't look right and she see
people was moving funny, that didn't move funny.

Speaker 2 (30:46):
Before I got shot, she she got pissed off, she
got mad at that, she got angry, angry, and defense.

Speaker 1 (30:53):
She was defending me when it's time to defend how
I didn't do it because in my mind is like,
it's not about you, it's about me.

Speaker 2 (30:59):
He's ad one.

Speaker 4 (31:00):
It's my world.

Speaker 2 (31:01):
I'm the blond one. I gotta figure this out.

Speaker 4 (31:03):
The Cardi line. Just now that you say I'm the drama, I.

Speaker 1 (31:07):
Walked the drama because I put her through so much shit.
She had and not only just me, she had to
battle with friends, family and everything else. And it's like
it was all of us against her, when really she
was just making sure I was there anybody that could
love your kids like they own.

Speaker 2 (31:23):
It's for you.

Speaker 1 (31:25):
I've seen this her pork clothes on go odside, one
o'clock in the morning. Just go walk the dominos and
get my son pizza and it's like I fucked that up.

Speaker 2 (31:34):
Tommy walked in the street like I wasn't no angel
on the streets.

Speaker 1 (31:37):
People I ran into that we had problems with and
they said my name and she just knew my face expression.

Speaker 2 (31:42):
She still in front of me, and it's like, nah,
don't do that.

Speaker 1 (31:47):
She's like, nah, like we both gonna get them, but nah,
it ain't. It ain't about that, like just chill, fall back,
let me be a man. Then now she starts like,
don't Now, I'm staying by your side. I'm not gonna
let you get a nigga get that close to you
until you feel safe. She did at all. So it's
like I fucked that whole package. That's real, fuck that
whole package.

Speaker 4 (32:06):
I can't say that everybody that I did wrong you
deserved that. There's no ways to who I did wrong
because I don't do people wrong for no reason and
maybe that's the woman in me.

Speaker 2 (32:16):
No, for real, I really have no regrets.

Speaker 4 (32:19):
Anybody that I did wrong, you deserve that ship. And
I'm dead serious because I don't just go around. I
don't cheat until I'm cheating on well back in the day. Now,
if I get cheated on God for big I will leave.
But before it was like, yeah, you want to play
a game. It's like you want to play a game,
I'm gonna play a game. I'mnna play work. And the
people always say, oh, I'm gonna give me somebody in wheelchair,
ain't got no this wheelchair going sixty miles per hour, nigga,

(32:42):
you would never see me even rolling, you would even
selling that nigga crib. The only way you can catch
me is that they got stairs and I'm getting carried out.
And there's been some times. There's been some times, but
in real life though, in the reality of it, the
cheer don't stop ship and being blonde don't stop ship
because I really did some I did min.

Speaker 3 (32:59):
Dirt in this chair.

Speaker 4 (33:01):
I didn't got as in this chair. Well, it's just
it's like I said, if you choose to feel sorry
for yourself, people are gonna treat you like you're sorry.
If you live in who you are and except like,
all right, this may not be I might not be
exactly who I was before, but this is just me
two point h then you're gonna get treated like that.
You gotta know your worth because anybody, like I said,

(33:22):
whether you're disabled, or whether you're not. If you don't
know your work, give you chump change, they're gonna break
change on your ass and you're gonna look like a food.
You understanding that.

Speaker 1 (33:31):
Going viral things to Frenchy, you know, because she let
popping out here in these streets.

Speaker 3 (33:35):
You feel me.

Speaker 1 (33:36):
I want to apologize to every girl like that with honestly,
not for real, like I wasn't like no, I cause
trauma on a lot of women that didn't.

Speaker 2 (33:46):
For my pleasure. It's like, I know you really liked me.
I know you really wanted me. I know, and I
took advantage. They're gonna, well, they don't want you now
your people.

Speaker 1 (33:58):
It's not every time I see my apolo. Yeah, I
apologize like all my exes. We cool, we could talk,
we vibe like from my baby mother. She didn't deserve
what I did though, a lot of females didn't deserve
what I did.

Speaker 4 (34:10):
It though, And just to be clear, he is not
apologizing because he's blond, because he did have of this
ship while he was blond. He's apologizing because he's growing up.

Speaker 2 (34:18):
I grew up. I know they deserve better. I wasn't
the man to give them better.

Speaker 1 (34:24):
So I feel like, don't stop somebody else's process, because
what you want going on, you're hurting people and moving
on you just causing trauma on them.

Speaker 2 (34:31):
That making it worse for the next man. Just move
out the way.

Speaker 1 (34:34):
If you feel like you can't benefit them, if you
better move out the way. If I out the way,
I can't add value to your life, I'm falling back
because I'm not going to stop the next opportunity to
come in that can add the value to your life
because of my silly prop That's how.

Speaker 4 (34:50):
A lot of people end up broken though, because people
don't know when to move out the way. People don't
when to let know to just let go, like all right,
this is no longer feeding any intres but people to people.
Instead of feeding someone's spirit, they want to take out
their mouths. They just want to they want to take
from their soul because it's like, oh, I've been with
you so long, nobody else is going to get anything
good from you.

Speaker 2 (35:10):
You know what I mean, love them that much, do
not break them down.

Speaker 4 (35:13):
If you love someone. I'm a firm believer as now
that i'm older. If you love someone, you let them go.
You know what I'm saying, because you know that they're
going to come back, And on top of that, even
if they don't come back, you still love them enough
to want to see them happy with someone else, especially
people that have kids with other people. When I'm saying
this to you, now, if it's not working out with
your baby daddy, if it's not working out with your
let them go because they still have to raise your child.

(35:34):
They still have to be there for your child. And
that's why so many people are broken, because it starts
from parenting, you know what I'm saying. So now, if
I see my parents fighting and arguing, what do you
think I'm going to do in my relationships? If I
see my mama and my daddy cheating, what you think
I'm going to do some relationships? If I see my
parents disrespecting each other? What you think I'm going to
do in relationships?

Speaker 3 (35:51):
You pass on.

Speaker 4 (35:52):
If I see my parents just staying and being passive
in relationships, what do you think I'm gonna do? I'm
gonna just stay and be passive too, And that's what
a lot of people do. It just it just happens
again in the next generation, and in the next generation.

Speaker 2 (36:02):
No space for all of us to cause this thing,
this world.

Speaker 4 (36:04):
Amen, and that's why these are my French facts. Yes,
so each and every episode we will now be doing
Frenchy facts, and this one is today. The simplest way
to date is to choose. Who choose. Chooses. You don't
chase attract. So if you feel yourself having a pool
too hard, you let go nothing that's meant for you.
It's gonna be hard, it's gonna feel easy. Yes, it'll

(36:26):
be harder to keep and maintained because everybody's gonna go
through growing changes and it's either you're gonna grow together
or you're gonna grow apart, and you have to be
willing to accept whichever one that is. Dating has nothing
to do with your d disability. It has everything to
do with how you see yourself. If you do not
love yourself, no one can love you. So the first
step is loving yourself. And it doesn't matter what age

(36:49):
you are. You can learn to love yourself again. Stop
giving yourself false hope thinking oh this will happen. I'll
start walking this day. Whether you walk or not, you
need to learn yourself in any situation, any predicament that
you're in. Don't just sit there and give yourself like, oh,
when this happens, then this will happen, because you might
not ever get that chance to happen, but you still
have the chance to fall in love with yourself. You
still have the chance to let somebody else fall in

(37:09):
love with who you are now, trusting God, trusting yourself,
and then you'll find the right partner. Until then you
will be alone. And it's okay to be alone. It's
okay to be alone. Don't force yourself to be with
someone just because of what society is showing and what's
putting out there here. There's gonna be those sad moments.
It's gonna be those lonely moments, but it's okay. It's
better to be happy alone, well sad alone, than unhappy

(37:33):
with someone.

Speaker 2 (37:34):
And that's my friend tracks, that's facts for your ass
right there.

Speaker 3 (37:40):
Yeah, I feel good.

Speaker 1 (37:41):
It's like therapy, man. I just unpacked a lot of stuff,
a lot of troublem Man. I'm about to send this
episode to a lot of people like look I changed.

Speaker 3 (37:48):
Look at you.

Speaker 4 (37:49):
No, now you make it seem like it's been around.

Speaker 3 (37:52):
I'm just playing.

Speaker 2 (37:53):
Now you're gonna lie. I.

Speaker 1 (37:54):
I just had a birthday party this week, A lot
of females down theirself at me.

Speaker 2 (37:58):
I don't even want it.

Speaker 1 (37:59):
The days, Oh, I'm taking it all. I'm trying to
see why I get in the bathroom. They'd be gonna
slide off to my creb this that, and nah, I'm
just I'm brushing off. I might y'all be right back,
and I'm silly. No, So for you to get curved
by a blind man. He told her you're coming right
back with no stick and he just moved like something.

Speaker 4 (38:14):
So what's your take?

Speaker 1 (38:14):
ONDTB energy is beautiful, good, full of energy, good vibes,
good energy, like I when you see a celebrity like, oh,
they stuck up and all that.

Speaker 2 (38:26):
After when she came in and it's like me and
her was best friend, like we knew each other forever.

Speaker 4 (38:29):
That's tign Gemini energy.

Speaker 1 (38:31):
Yeah, she dancing twerk and everything. Yo, come on, let's
take a picture, like grabbing me, Let's take a picture.
I'm like, well, I love this energy. I'm like, yo,
clear the stage is too many people on stage? She said, Nah,
a lot of shit leave them. So it's like she
didn't let that superstar fame getar her head. She rocked
out with the crowd. She's supposed left at two thirty.
She wound up leaving at three thirty. I had to
pay extra for the for the the black truck, but

(38:52):
it didn't matter, like the energy was unmatched.

Speaker 4 (38:54):
What time did the club close for? Okay? What time
you left?

Speaker 2 (39:00):
Five? Six?

Speaker 4 (39:01):
Oh?

Speaker 3 (39:01):
So you had to sit there.

Speaker 2 (39:03):
Count money and shit, count your prey, which my sister
did because I was fried rice.

Speaker 4 (39:07):
Oh my god, it was a good turnout. It wasn't
amazing I seen.

Speaker 3 (39:11):
I was like you look at my brother. I was.

Speaker 1 (39:15):
It was.

Speaker 2 (39:16):
It was always good man, you gotta go out there
and just have fun and joy yourself.

Speaker 1 (39:19):
Ain't about me. I just felt good just to be
around love, you know what I mean. So that was
one of those ones. Man, I ain't like real pointing
good today.

Speaker 4 (39:27):
I'm happy that you enjoyed your birthday. It's a blessing
to even it's a blessing. Think about it. It's a
blessing as a black man to even see this age,
especially a black man coming from where you come from,
which is good, you know what I mean, and especially
getting shot. So this is a landmark right now.

Speaker 2 (39:41):
I got friends I never seen twenty.

Speaker 4 (39:43):
God is so good.

Speaker 2 (39:44):
Friends I never seen nineteen. So it's like I gotta live.
I'm living.

Speaker 1 (39:48):
Not only I'm living for myself, I'm living for them
the life that they never had. So I'm every time
I pop a bottle, I said, hey, it could have
been me in a grave. Thirteen years ago. It could
have been me in a grave. So every time I
popped about on the club, this is another accomplishment, or
another year I reach, another year that they can't stop me,
another year that they gonna hit them, they gonna hit me,
pop my ship. The worst thing they did was let

(40:09):
me get up off that floor. Because now I'm shaking
the earth. And that's how I'm over it.

Speaker 4 (40:14):
And I always tell people that God put me in
his chair because it got me in doors that I
would never be able to walk in. So doors that
I would never be able to walk in, he made
accessible so that I could roll through with quickness and
smoothness and grace. So at the end of the day,
look at your disability. Stop looking at as a disability,
and look at it as a new ability. We were

(40:35):
told by someone that we shouldn't use that word, But
at the end of the day, I'm taking the power
back from that power.

Speaker 2 (40:40):
I don't feel that.

Speaker 4 (40:41):
I don't feel no way about that word.

Speaker 3 (40:45):
You know what, I don't.

Speaker 4 (40:46):
I just feel like I feel like at the end
of the day, I took this, we took this, and
I'm gonna speak my part than let my brother do his.
But I took this and you know, made it into
what works for me, And now I'm doing things that
people that are ablebody aren't doing it and can't do,
you know what I mean.

Speaker 1 (41:04):
So with all her being at a wheelchair, me having
a stick, it would never be in a blode but
Nazi podcast exactly. I've still been in the trenches somewhere
right now, somebody a blessing, nobody that's a blessing, and
nothing that it feels good like this disabled thing, like, yeah,
I'm glad people come me disabled. I love it right
because when I'm in the club, her manager was like, yeah, bro,

(41:26):
you're really doing it.

Speaker 2 (41:27):
And I said doing what He like, you really disabled?
That ship is packed. I said, what you expect, he said,
I ain't gonna lie. I didn't think it was gonna
be like that's just the pack out of the show. Hello,
I love this ship.

Speaker 3 (41:36):
I feel good. I feel part of my ship.

Speaker 4 (41:38):
But you need to come do one in Queens.

Speaker 2 (41:40):
And I'm coming to Queens. I'm coming.

Speaker 4 (41:45):
Come on.

Speaker 2 (41:46):
That's a good no, it is a team floor shout out.

Speaker 1 (41:49):
I can we got some ship working out Hollywood, butter
like be rocking fan and like, I'm coming to Queens.

Speaker 2 (41:54):
I'm even Brooklyn alone. When I did it, I came.

Speaker 4 (41:56):
I saw a conquered let me let me know when
you get let me know when you come the Queens
that I can't go to, I'm coming to out there.
It was no fatalities though.

Speaker 2 (42:06):
It was good, no fights, no nothing, abody saying, good energy,
good timing.

Speaker 1 (42:10):
But we we even played before I let go. You
know that's the family backyard music. I mean, nigga, go
home safe, be full the guns in a call like
that's good safe, well before before we even get out here.
I just want to let people know I'm the motherfuckering
man when I walk through. Nah No, I ain't gonna

(42:31):
do that, but I just want to let people know.
Don't hold on to nobody that you know, you're not
providing value to that, You're just using them, You beating
that person down, You're just thinking about yourself. It's not good,
especially if that person got kids, because when you beat
them down, guess what, you leaving their kids with nothing
to really latch onto it.

Speaker 2 (42:49):
And that's selfish. Like I had to learn that by
let my.

Speaker 3 (42:53):
Baby mother go.

Speaker 2 (42:54):
I'm gonna stop saying my baby mother, my child's mother.

Speaker 1 (42:56):
Gold be happy because if if I'm grabbing herd and
I'm grabbing my eggs to honey and I'm pulling them along,
dragging up, they got two kids that depend on them,
so they gleaning on that, I'm bleaning on them.

Speaker 2 (43:08):
So who they kids leaning on?

Speaker 1 (43:10):
So I was selfish if you can't if you're laying
down next to a person and you're not loving that person,
then you shouldn't be laying next to that person.

Speaker 2 (43:20):
I believe in spirits and demons and energy and everything.

Speaker 1 (43:24):
You don't need that on you. Let that go one night,
staying don't mean nothing. I was with somebody that just
sat there and said, so he tells me it was
okay to catch an STD.

Speaker 2 (43:34):
That's terrible. I'm like, huh, who said that? I ain't
even gonna tell you.

Speaker 4 (43:38):
Oh my god, No, you gotta put these people out
in the world because those of you was like sit
there and there and fest.

Speaker 2 (43:43):
It's okay to catch a SDD as long as it's terrible,
I said, but.

Speaker 4 (43:46):
Do they not know that every time you catch an
STD it makes you more susceptible to bigger STDs.

Speaker 2 (43:53):
The only thing that do is makes you smarter, I said, Bro,
I'm smart as fuck. I know what to do what
not to do.

Speaker 4 (44:00):
So like that makes you smarter insane?

Speaker 2 (44:03):
No, it makes you really actually dumb. No funny, no
funny ship, But that's that. How do I say this
the right way?

Speaker 4 (44:11):
Say it exactly how you want to say?

Speaker 5 (44:13):
That's that's some real like Negro ship, yo, But that's
not real, Like I don't want to do the hard.

Speaker 3 (44:21):
That's some hard.

Speaker 1 (44:22):
That's how aides get passed around. That's how everything sds
and all that passed herpes and all that ship. I'm
just like that ship was just dumb. But living your truth.
Don't pretend to be something united. If life change, roll
with the changes, but make sure you got control of
the changes. Don't hide behind the walls or who you are,
because you're still that person, no matter if you lost

(44:44):
your sight, no matter if you lost your ability to walk,
You're still that person.

Speaker 2 (44:47):
Don't let nobody tell you you not who you are.
I am seeing. It will always be seeing.

Speaker 1 (44:51):
On whether I can see, whether I can't see. Nobody
can't tell me of the difference. I feel like I'm
a cool nigga even not seeing. Let's go so on
that note, Man, Frenchie, did you fuck this one up?
And the words of jay Z, I would not lose
man A look the episode of Blowing I See podcasts. Man,
we off this ship.