October 11, 2024 • 38 mins
Occultism is not allowed in Christian Science because if there is a need to rely on external symbols and sacred tools means you lack actual faith in God & your God given discernment
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Tello and welcome to Brain bowth I'm Michelle Panama Dousa,
and today on the podcast, we're gonna be talking about
Christian science. Now, all right, if you've been listening to
me in the past.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
I am all over with religions and you know, pan
and mythology and all of this. I don't know the
world religions.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
And I guess what brought me to become that kind
of seeker is when I run into something that I
disagree with in religion, it makes me distrust the whole thing. Because,
(00:50):
for example, in the Old Testament, there's talks about it's
okay to have slaves, and it's okay to kill your
you know, your family member if they if they fight
with you.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
It's just a bunch of weird stuff. And I'm like, gosh,
I you know, like when you build an alter to God,
you're not supposed to use the rubbish discards from the
houses like that. You have to order the cornerstones.
Speaker 3 (01:21):
No.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
Actually, I think the reason why they started using cornerstones
is because it's forbidden in the Old Testament to use
like scraps from other construction sites to make an altar.
I guess they used to do that, and it was
considered like you know, when you make an alter to God,
it use like the best pieces, just like you know,
it doesn't really have any relevance to my life now,
(01:44):
and so I would go and all right, there's that Bible.
I'm gonna go look at this, and I just like
it was into world religions for a while, and of
course mythology, and then I got into occultism. I mean,
I'm sorry, but you know, it's like when you have
telepathic or psychic experiences, it makes you want to figure
(02:09):
it out because I want to be a remote viewer
that can like find missing persons. Wouldn't that be great,
you know, to work on cases like that, and you
could solve homicide cases, find missing children. I mean, it
would be great to develop that skill. I don't see
it as like an evil sense. I see it as
like a god given sense that we haven't evolved completely
(02:31):
yet or figured it out yet. So I do have
some experiences with it, and I just don't have complete
control over it. But what sense do we? Like I
don't have perfect vision, perfect sense of smell, or you
know whatever. So it's just another sense that I would
(02:53):
like to develop and I don't think it's evil, although
my mom used to tell me that when I was
a kid, whenever I had these psychic experiences, she looked
at me like I was some like, uh, you know
that movie The Brood or that Little Girl, it's like
this evil little girl like or the movie. Oh well,
there's a really good horror.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
Movie about these children that have these like supernatural powers
and then they wind up, you know, the people in
the town wind up killing them because they're afraid of them.
Oh gosh, what was the name of that movie?
Speaker 1 (03:29):
Is an old one? But yeah, I felt like that,
like she looked at me, She's like, that comes from
the devil. And then and then I saw Christianity the
way it was interpreted through her as being very hypocritical,
because she used to say that all these people are
going to hell. Like if if you're different religion, if
(03:50):
you don't accept Jesus Christ as your learning savior, going
to hell. I'm like, really, what kind of God would
do that? It sounds like, you know, it says in
the Bible God is a jealous God and you kind
of have no God before him. So I wind up
going through all of these different religions and then I
found my way back to Christianity. And so I'm not
(04:16):
I don't believe in you know, like trying to recruit
people and come join us.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
Nothing like that.
Speaker 1 (04:22):
It's something like if it's your favorite you know, God
exists and your spirituality is personal. If you happen to
like a certain type of food, you know, I will
tell you, hey, go check out this restaurant. But I'm
not going to be like knocking people's doors and saying
I'm not selling anything, you know, like not selling anything here.
I'm just gonna introduce Christian science a bit because there's
(04:46):
a lot of bad publicity and just prejudice against it. Hey, quiet,
So I do have some dogs here that may be
barking in the background from time to time, and I
have some music going. This is have you heard of
(05:11):
hurts music? It's like healing sounds and there's different frequencies.
And you know, the theory is that like sound is
a vibration and that ourselves respond to sound and it
puts us in a mood, which is true, right, we
listen to music to put us in a certain mood.
(05:32):
Or seems as though a lot of entertainment is geared
toward excitement. It's like caffeine. Get up and go get
really excited, get really happy, and it's just like it's
kind of spassy, you know. And for a long time
I thought that's what happiness is. It's like that that
(05:56):
like breaking point of like oh my god, it's like
so great. It's like, oh always, it's like orgasmic, and
it's it's like that was the be all, end all,
And now I'm like, I just I don't. I think
it's a lot of energy that's wasted and trying to
be happy, and it's it's not productive. It's almost like
(06:16):
a drug where if we could, you know, just pace ourselves.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
And and not have like always trying to just get
high off of being super excited. It doesn't necessarily mean
you're a drug addict, Like you don't have to do
drugs to always be seeking that kind of rush and excitement.
It could be from you know, chasing love. A lot
of people you know, I've done this too, like chasing
love or gott to find the best best video game
(06:43):
where you gotta find gotta do something great. What are
you doing this weekend? You got to go do something great?
Speaker 1 (06:47):
And now I'm like I missed out on a lot
of joy in life by thinking that was happiness when
I should be like doing something instead of just chilling
out and just enjoying myself where I am and who
I'm with. And it doesn't have to be some you know,
(07:10):
Facebook type of thing that you write about. It's just
like just the kind of normal type of being alive,
like nothing, just everyday stuff, you know, like just finding
happiness and that everyday stuff. So that's where I'm at now,
(07:31):
and I find a.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Lot of these revelations, like the best revelations I've been
having lately are coming through Christian science, and so.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
I sound like I'm starting to evangelize and I don't
want to do that. Well, I was into it for
a long time, but I never actually attended the church.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
You know.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
Now I'm going like twice a week. I can't look
I mean, I look forward to going all the time.
It's like it's like it it quenches my spiritual thirst
and the people there are wise.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
And.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
I just feel like I finally found something that fits
with me because I've been going all over the place,
all different types of churches and just never really feeling
like it was something like I wanted to be a
part of and not for anything, not for any bad reason,
(08:38):
you know, nothing against people or anything. It just there
would always be something that came up and then it
just bothered me about maybe something I disagree with. So
in this week's lesson with this Christian Science Church, one
of the passages was about not coveting your neighbor's slave,
(09:04):
and coincidentally, I.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Also was watching this other philosopher Yusef. I forgot his name, anyways,
He's like, he's.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
A really good philosopher. I'm sorry, I don't I don't
really want to look up his name right now.
Speaker 2 (09:22):
But what is his name? Yusuf?
Speaker 1 (09:26):
He's into Ai and he's from Israel. I wish I
had somebody here to tell me. But okay, So I
was listening to him and he was he was saying
something about this as well. And so right after I
watched his video, I'm reading this week's lesson about the
same the same passage where it says don't covert your
(09:48):
neighbor's slave. And also you can kill your slave, or
if you if you wind up getting in a fight
and the slave gets hurt, you know you.
Speaker 2 (09:58):
Have to pay him.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
It's just all this weird, these weird rules, and I
got me thinking like this would be the point where
I turn away and say, Okay, I'm done with this.
Speaker 2 (10:10):
I'm gonna go look somewhere else.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
But for some reason, I'm sticking with it, and I'm
just not throwing everything away just because this passage bothers me.
So whenever I don't understand something, I pray and then
(10:32):
I put it aside, and then eventually I get a
revelation somewhere when I least expect it. I believe this
is how the creative mind works. Like if you ever
have to come up with some creative idea and you
are just like the hard It's like trying to find
your keys. It's like where did I put my keys?
And then the harder you try, the harder it is.
(10:54):
So it's the same thing like it's creativity is kind
of like a memory. Same thing with psychicability. It's kind
of like that memory too, where when you have the realization,
it feels like you remembered it and you can't remember
it by trying. You have to just have faith, like
you set your mind, you tell your It's like going
(11:15):
to sleep and telling your brain, I want to have
a lucid dream tonight, you can't. The more you want it,
the more your your body knows like, oh you want it,
that means you don't have it. But if you can
just say okay, I'm going to have it and boom,
set your clock, you can make yourself wake up, or
you can make yourself have a lucid dream. And I
believe that this is how creativity works also, so I'm
(11:40):
thinking about it and I had this realization from there
was a quote from it was Socrates, and he said
that barbarians are natural slaves because they are slaves to
their desires and their emotions, and people that have already
(12:08):
mastered their desires have a right and a duty to
enslave these people because otherwise they would be a danger
to themselves and society. So that's how they used to
manage these Today we would see these drug addicts and
criminals walking around and they're just always looking to be happy,
(12:30):
always looking to get their fix. In the past, these
people would be enslaved and they would be watched and
they could earn their freedom, just like Moses earned his freedom. Right,
was it Moses or Joseph. Yeah, Joseph earned his freedom
(12:53):
Joseph was enslaved and then he earned his freedom after
he became this like visionaries psychic for the Pharaoh, who
could interpret dreams, and he showed himself to be a
very good man.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
And so slave owners.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
If they were taught that, like Socrates said, if you
mistreat your slave, then you are no better than your slave,
because you can't control your emotions. So to be a
person who's corrupted is just like a slave who wants
to just they can't get enough like adrenaline, rushes and excitement.
(13:32):
So it would be proper to own a slave. And
this sounds terrible. It's like proper to own a slave
so that they don't hurt themselves. Or I sound like
such an elitist, and I never thought I would come
to this point, but because I meditated on it and
I create on it, like that's where I got this
(13:54):
revelation from. And there are other things in the Bible
I don't don't agree with, of course, But then it's like, well,
you know, this was a different time. I'm not saying
that it's good. It's like, yeah, I don't believe in
owning slaves. I just I just don't I think that
(14:16):
people should be free, and then if they everyone should
be born free. And then if they choose materialism, like
in Christian science, materialism is evil. It's created by man,
and it's not created by God or by spirit, but
it's created by man. And so if we worship materialism,
(14:37):
then we're slaves to that. And if it's a choice,
really there has to be laws that govern people, so
they don't, you know, go go too far out and
hurting each other. But Christian scientists believe that we are
(15:00):
made of spirit, and so we follow the spiritual laws,
but also the laws of the land, because it's not
like you're supposed to be a rebel rouser or anything
like that. So let's see what brings a person to.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Want to.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
Be a fervent follower of religion and start reading the Bible.
Speaker 2 (15:35):
I guess.
Speaker 1 (15:38):
Sorry about my does. I guess what brought me to
this place was extreme heartbreak and I thought my son
was gonna die in January and it it completely.
Speaker 2 (16:00):
Completely just changed my.
Speaker 1 (16:06):
Life and made me turn to deep prayer. And a
lot of things have happened since January. Now where this
is October, no September, No, it's October. Shee's okay, it's
October now, so okay, ten months gone by, and he's
not going to die, thank God. And a lot of
(16:30):
things have happened that are just complete miracles and putting
me in these places and teaching me these things, and
my life has forever changed. And I'm going to dedicate
the rest of my life to God. And so I
don't expect other people to to follow me. But I
(16:52):
just wanted to do a podcast just to put this
out there, because I have a lot of other podcasts
that go on about other religions and so forth, and
I just wanted to explain, why did you, like, you're
so liberal with other religions and now all of a sudden, no,
there's no other God before Jesus, and you become just
about Christian What happened? So, yeah, that's what happened. I
(17:16):
still have a habit of the tarot car though, I
just I like it's a tool for me to listen
because Christian science is different than Theosophy, which is another
religion I was into for a while. Theosophy is like freemasonry,
(17:39):
and it delves into some aspects of the occult where
it becomes kind of dark because it's all about like
you're using your own will, and that is kind of
a form of slavery too, because if you're always trying
(18:01):
to get what you want, then you're not really free
because you still are lacking and you want something. Whereas
if you are in this God consciousness, you have everything
and you are exactly where you're supposed to be, and
then God is using you. You've relinquished your.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Free will so that you could be a part of
this collective spirit which is God. And if God wants
you to do something, then you do it. And so
as a newbie, I have to like, well, what is
it that God wants? And I need to be able
to hear, and I have such better clairvoyance when I
(18:40):
use tarot cards and other tools like that, So I'm
not sure if that's something I should even divulge or
that should maybe keep that like kind of a secret.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
There are a lot of psychics use different things like
the use the Ouisi board, crystal balls, palm reading like
I like palm reading too, also looking at signs and
nature with birds. So I mean, if you're you know,
Christian scientists are allowed to listen to God and talk
to God through nature. So I think my tarot parts
are okay, Like I'm I'm only doing it so it's
(19:25):
like just a better way too. It's just a better
way for me to use my clairvoyance so I can
hear what God's saying.
Speaker 2 (19:35):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (19:36):
With that being said, I'm reading this manual too, of
these the rule book, and it says, okay, you're not
supposed to engage in seances and all this other mediumship,
and I'm like, shit, I like that, and it's it's
it's like tell It's like your parents telling you. I
don't want to hang out those friends anymore. Those friends
are a bad influence. It's like, I like my friends
you have, but they're a bad influence. Just stay away
(19:56):
from them. So I'm like, okay, I mean, I'm trying
to sort that out right now, but I don't know.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
I like all the.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
I like the spiritualism, and you're not supposed to engage
in that. So I got to give that up, and
all right, I'll do that. But I'm not.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
Kidding out my terrort cards yet.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
In the tarot card deck there the first one is
the zero is the fool, And that's where I began.
Speaker 2 (20:31):
In January.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
I kept pulling up the Full, and then I found
this book, Searching for the Full. It's a good book.
It's about the tarot. It's called Finding the Full. Finding
the Full, Yeah, and so basically it's there is life
after heartbreak, and the Full represents this stage in the
(20:53):
journey of life after heartbreak and it seems like the
world has ended when your heart is broken, but actually
it's just beginning because your heart breaks open and then
an infinite amount of possibilities emerge. And it's a lot
easier to just like not engage with that because it's
(21:14):
so overwhelming. It's like, okay, when your world comes crashing down,
it's like, you know, think of these people in the
Florida hurricane, Like they just lost everything, and now what
are they going to do? Where are they going to go?
How are they going to rebuild? It is the end,
but it's also a beginning. And so this is where
(21:35):
the fool is and that was that was the journey
that I was in as well. And the card shows
this hobo, this happy hobo, or maybe this hobo that
just doesn't care. He's walking defiantly with his head up
in the air, and he's just about to walk over
(21:56):
a cliff and he's carrying like a little sack and
you can see as nothing, he lost everything. And behind
him is this dog who's kind of maybe nipping at
his heels, barking at him, cheerfully swallowing him. Because to
a dog, any human, the poorest person is like a
king to a dog. Because people, they see people as
(22:19):
you could do whatever you want, so I'll follow you.
You can give me food, you can go get food.
Like they look at us like we're rock stars. But
the way we see ourselves is how what we're comparing
ourselves to. So it's all relative. But we could choose
to see ourselves as wow, we're on top of the world,
(22:42):
or we're just about to fall off a cliff. And
that's what the fool is too.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
So it's like, how do you see yourselves where you are?
Let's say, like you lost everything, you could, you know,
do some mental acrobats. And I think this is why
people like to turn to alcohol and stuff when they
lose everything, because it helps it helps temporarily shift your pective, perspective,
maybe give you your a little bit of a different
(23:07):
way of looking at things. So they're like, holy cow,
I just lost everything. Yeah, that's gonna be a truth
and you could sit there and dwell on it, But
how can you turn it around so that you could
see it a little differently?
Speaker 1 (23:21):
And that's what the fool is.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
And so.
Speaker 1 (23:27):
I'm not sure how this miracle happened because my son
was diagnosed with like terminal cancer and they said they
were certain that that's this is what it was. There's
like a rare form of bluesen cancer.
Speaker 3 (23:43):
Well, I I was hearing God tell me, no matter
what they say, it's not cancer, just don't believe it.
Speaker 2 (23:54):
It's not cancer. Don't believe it.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
So I went with that, and a lot of things happened.
I went to go we wanted to get a second opinion.
They wouldn't let us. And then we said we're gonna
go to a city of Hope in California, where his
father was treated when he was nineteen, and they were like, no,
(24:17):
you can't go there. They don't have children's cancer clinic.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
And they do.
Speaker 1 (24:20):
It's just a bunch of weird stuff. And then it
just got weirder and weird, and it's like, why are
you trying to prevent us so bad? They called CPS.
They're like, you got to come back here he needs chemotherapy,
radiation and it affected me and God just kept telling me, no,
don't listen to them. So we went to Texas. We
got a second opinion, and it turned out that the
(24:42):
mask that they biopsy turned out being an aneurysm. And
there were two. There was one his.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
AML that was there for a long time, and then
there was the aneurism, which shrunk by twenty five.
Speaker 1 (24:54):
Percent, so I know it wasn't when they when we left,
they said, oh no, now it's a real tumor. And
there's this policy if it's a Wilms tumor, you have
to have it, treat it. And so they could call
CPS and they could force you back into the hospital
because it's like eighty to ninety percent success rates if
it's if it's caught early. Otherwise it grows doubles in
(25:16):
size every two to four weeks. So after three weeks
it's shrunk by twenty five percent. And we just this
is how God works. Puts in this MD who is
in the emergency room, who just so happened to be
a nephrologist. He used to he was a radiologist. He's
from India. He was really started out as a radiologist.
Then he became a neufrologist, and now he's like an
(25:38):
MD working in the emergency clinic and the emergency hospital
at a Plano, Texas. Two years experience and a TSC clinic.
What are the odds? He's like, No, there was no
question it was an AML. It was embolized in January.
No question it was bleeding, hemorrhaging. Wilm's tumors don't hemorrhage.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
They don't have that. And it's.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
It's very easy to for if you know what you're doing,
if you know what you're looking at, you know it's
an AML because you see the fatty tissue and everything.
So there's an AML, and then there's this other thing
and he's like, it's hypodense. He's not sure what it is.
The biopsy says it's a Wilms tumor and an AML. Okay,
we come back, wind up calling the guy who embolized.
(26:26):
I call a bunch of nephrologists when I came back
here to try to get it handled because we did
not want to do radiation or anything like that, because
you know, it's like, if you don't.
Speaker 2 (26:37):
Need it, why would you, you know, take all this
other stuff.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Plus they want to give him these anti epileptic drugs,
which he's already shown how toxic side effects. They don't
work in sixty percent of children with tubers. Grossis AEDs
don't work for him.
Speaker 2 (26:51):
And they actually are toxic. So it's like, I don't
know why they keep doing this. It's like, once there's
a lot, it's really hard to change a law. Oh,
if you're if you hit your parent, your parent can
kill you. Like that's a law in the Bible, and
it cannot be removed. It's really hard to get a
(27:12):
diagnosis removed or a law removed. It's anyways.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
So in July, no, in June, we call the doctor
who implies that I can't get an appointment anywhere. I
got this Wilm's tumor on his record that's marring it.
And it's like nobody will even see us. So I'm like, hey,
can you look at it. It's not acting like it.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
He's having you know this son, he's still having the
symptoms of a bleeding AML, which is hypophylemic shock. And
you can't move or talk or drink water or anything.
And you got hammer, you know, your blood cloths peeing
out blood cloths and all this stuff, and I couldn't
get him any treatment because everyone's like, oh, it's a
(27:52):
Wilms tumor.
Speaker 1 (27:53):
So we call him or we're like, hey, can you
fix this because it's not a Wilm's tumor and you know,
and he's like he just called Well the CPS. CPS
was dropped because that lady said, oh, yeah, I know
these people. They've been calling on other parents to and
she saw we were just trying to get a second
opinion and stuff.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
So the CPS case was dropped. But now he's eighteen.
Now they call the APS people Adult Protective Services, and anyways,
I can't get any help. So a couple of weeks
go by.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
Finally I got to take the emergency room and I'm
so scared. I was so scared because I knew they
were gonna do chemotherapy, radiation and I have eileptic drugs,
and I was like, this is the end. We go
to the hospital and then that's the end. But then
God said, no, just take them.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
It's not the end. You can trust you know, you
can take them. It's gonna be fine. It was a
freaking nightmare and it was very hard. It turned out
to be fine, but it was really really hard, and
it was just one thing after another, or of a
bunch of strings of just God putting things in my path.
(29:08):
And it's like, thank you so much for doing this.
I'm still amazed.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
And how it all unfolded and how we got out of.
Speaker 2 (29:15):
There, how we got out of there alive.
Speaker 1 (29:17):
But we still got this core case looming over us
because even though there's nothing in place.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
He had to have that and affected me because by.
Speaker 1 (29:27):
The time, let's see, it was in August scheduled, and
affected me because it's just inflamed. You know, we couldn't
save it. Back in January, it was like five centimeters
or something, and then the aneurysm start bleeding into it
and super inflamed, and it's just it was the only
way I can get him treatment. I tried cryoblation. I
(29:49):
just we couldn't even leave the state because the APS people.
We had people pounding on our door yelling Mile's name,
calling us, telling us to get chemotherapy.
Speaker 2 (29:58):
Just crazy stuff.
Speaker 1 (30:00):
Him in the hospital right after them affected me. He's
laying on the bed. Guy comes in and he's like,
you know, looking for him. He's like, you have once
or throws the papers right on top of him. He's
like half conscious, you know, morphine drip. Just it's just
so freaking weird. And the politics in this state are
(30:21):
just crazy. I don't I never thought that this is.
Like I used to wonder, how the heck if you
were a parent and your kid got molested by a priest,
how would you deal with it? I thought, frick, I
don't know how anybody can hold me back from getting
revenge on that priest. But now this is even worse
(30:42):
because it's not just you know, fondling. This is like
actual freaking psychological damage, physical damage. And on top of it,
they want to separate us and take them away to
go live in this retirement home where.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
They already have like twelve I looked at the review.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
There's already twelve people families that are accusing the facility
of killing their family member for money to take.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
Because if you take custody of.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
Somebody like an elderly person, and you have in the
state has guardianship of them, they control all of their finances,
they and everything. They can't vote, they can't do anything.
They want to do this to my son.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
For what because because it turned out he didn't have cancer, Like,
what the heck, it's just the weird.
Speaker 1 (31:30):
It's not like I'm completely over this, but at least
he's alive, and at least that's all good, and his
blood work is good.
Speaker 2 (31:38):
There's no cancer and his lymph nose or anything like that.
It's just now I got.
Speaker 1 (31:44):
To deal with these state workers bothering us, trying to
they want to take away his rights, and it's.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
Like a David and Goliath type of thing. So I
don't know how this is gonna happen. I don't know
what's going to happen to me. If they get their way,
I'll be in.
Speaker 1 (32:02):
Jail and I will be in that facility and then
they'll start pumping them full of drugs and say that
they're right all along, but they're not. So I wanna
put that out there too. So getting back to the
tarot cards, I guess I'm gonna have to have a
(32:26):
talk with the with the with the the pastor there,
because I'm not sure if I should be using it
if that's considered mediumship. But isn't prayer also form a mediumship?
(32:49):
I mean, or just looking at signs, the birds and things.
Isn't that a former mediumship. Also, there's a law against
what do they call it mental.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
Something like it's it basically it's like misusing your your telepathy.
You're not supposed to pray for people unless they agree
to it. You can't you know how people say I'll
pray for you, you have to have their agreement.
Speaker 1 (33:27):
Do you w do they want you to pray for them?
You can't go around p even praying for people. And
you definitely can't wish people harm. And if anybody finds
out that you've had bad thoughts, because thoughts are things,
they're material things, Ideas are things. Thoughts are things, and
(33:48):
so having a thought of wanting to harm somebody can
get you kicked out of the church. So you think, like, oh,
how are they gonna know you're thinking that? But you
know these people, a lot of these people are really
psychic too, and they could just sense it.
Speaker 4 (34:04):
A lot of just regular people could sense things when
you know it will and stuff. They could get a
good sense of that. So now I'm like, I have
this internal struggle, like I want to you know, you
imagine if a priest molested your kid, that's bad. Wouldn't
you want to do something to them? Or if there
was like a kidnapper. Now they want a kidnap my son,
(34:27):
and they want their a bunch of liars. They deleted
the records, alter the records, lied about me. It's like
I'm having a really hard time trying to just keep
my thoughts in order so that I don't have evil thoughts.
Speaker 1 (34:42):
And that's where I am right now. So I wanted to.
Speaker 2 (34:45):
Read something before I go.
Speaker 1 (34:47):
I'm gonna just read something from this Christian science be
called this is the Sentinel now all, I guess it's
a worldwide religion, right, So every week everybody reads a
certain section of the Bible, like there's all these passages
(35:12):
and then they read we read Science and Health from
Mary Eddie Baker. I'm sorry, Mary Baker Eddie.
Speaker 2 (35:20):
And so it's called science and Health, and it's very metaphysical.
It's all about healing and I guess operating in this
state of consciousness where you are in spirit with God
(35:41):
so that you can do God's will. And God is
love and God is good and and I guess that's
the simple. That's it in a nutshell pretty much. So
disease does not come from God. Disease comes from comes
(36:03):
from man. Because God is immortal. And in Herbalism we
learn that too, that all disease begins on the spirit
level from turning away from it. So if there's a
discord in the spirit, say like person's not in alignment
(36:24):
with their spirit, it goes into the psychological area where
there's this is gon be the thoughts and the choices
and habits and so forth, or even just mind over matter,
that kind of thing, and then it once it reaches
down into the physical, well then it is like needs
to be treated with a physical otherwise you can treat
(36:49):
a psychological disease with psychology. And then but in Christian
science it's like, no, there is no material and so
everything can be treated through spirit. And I like that.
I like that actually better. Okay, it says here Psalms sixteen,
(37:17):
Psalms I'm sorry, Psalms one, thirty nine, twenty three to
twenty four. Search me, Oh God, and know my heart,
try me and know my thoughts, and see if there
be any wicked way in me, and lead me in
the way everlasting. In In the Bible, Bahand is the
Hebrew word for try, and it connotes the testing of
(37:42):
metal to determine its quality. This is an image that
occurs throughout the Bible. Job says, for example, when he
hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold, and
Proverbs seventeen three has the finding pot is for silver
and the furnace for gold. But the Lord trieth the hearts.
(38:05):
And this is alchemy where or if you're you know,
looking for rocks, and sometimes the friction. If you find
a like a gem, right a geode, sometimes you have
to break it. And people have to be broken too,
sometimes to see what to try them, to see what
(38:25):
they're made of. And in this breaking, having your heart broken,
your world crashing, that full archetype. This is what makes
us who we are. So it's like the fool's journey?
What are you gonna do when everything is taken away?
Who are you? And who you are is who you're
gonna become? God will call you. Are you gonna listen?
(38:52):
Thank you so much for joining me here today. I'm
Brainbow and I hope to see you next time.
Tello and welcome to Brain bowth I'm Michelle Panama Dousa,
and today on the podcast, we're gonna be talking about
Christian science. Now, all right, if you've been listening to
me in the past.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
I am all over with religions and you know, pan
and mythology and all of this. I don't know the
world religions.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
And I guess what brought me to become that kind
of seeker is when I run into something that I
disagree with in religion, it makes me distrust the whole thing. Because,
(00:50):
for example, in the Old Testament, there's talks about it's
okay to have slaves, and it's okay to kill your
you know, your family member if they if they fight
with you.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
It's just a bunch of weird stuff. And I'm like, gosh,
I you know, like when you build an alter to God,
you're not supposed to use the rubbish discards from the
houses like that. You have to order the cornerstones.
Speaker 3 (01:21):
No.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
Actually, I think the reason why they started using cornerstones
is because it's forbidden in the Old Testament to use
like scraps from other construction sites to make an altar.
I guess they used to do that, and it was
considered like you know, when you make an alter to God,
it use like the best pieces, just like you know,
it doesn't really have any relevance to my life now,
(01:44):
and so I would go and all right, there's that Bible.
I'm gonna go look at this, and I just like
it was into world religions for a while, and of
course mythology, and then I got into occultism. I mean,
I'm sorry, but you know, it's like when you have
telepathic or psychic experiences, it makes you want to figure
(02:09):
it out because I want to be a remote viewer
that can like find missing persons. Wouldn't that be great,
you know, to work on cases like that, and you
could solve homicide cases, find missing children. I mean, it
would be great to develop that skill. I don't see
it as like an evil sense. I see it as
like a god given sense that we haven't evolved completely
(02:31):
yet or figured it out yet. So I do have
some experiences with it, and I just don't have complete
control over it. But what sense do we? Like I
don't have perfect vision, perfect sense of smell, or you
know whatever. So it's just another sense that I would
(02:53):
like to develop and I don't think it's evil, although
my mom used to tell me that when I was
a kid, whenever I had these psychic experiences, she looked
at me like I was some like, uh, you know
that movie The Brood or that Little Girl, it's like
this evil little girl like or the movie. Oh well,
there's a really good horror.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
Movie about these children that have these like supernatural powers
and then they wind up, you know, the people in
the town wind up killing them because they're afraid of them.
Oh gosh, what was the name of that movie?
Speaker 1 (03:29):
Is an old one? But yeah, I felt like that,
like she looked at me, She's like, that comes from
the devil. And then and then I saw Christianity the
way it was interpreted through her as being very hypocritical,
because she used to say that all these people are
going to hell. Like if if you're different religion, if
(03:50):
you don't accept Jesus Christ as your learning savior, going
to hell. I'm like, really, what kind of God would
do that? It sounds like, you know, it says in
the Bible God is a jealous God and you kind
of have no God before him. So I wind up
going through all of these different religions and then I
found my way back to Christianity. And so I'm not
(04:16):
I don't believe in you know, like trying to recruit
people and come join us.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
Nothing like that.
Speaker 1 (04:22):
It's something like if it's your favorite you know, God
exists and your spirituality is personal. If you happen to
like a certain type of food, you know, I will
tell you, hey, go check out this restaurant. But I'm
not going to be like knocking people's doors and saying
I'm not selling anything, you know, like not selling anything here.
I'm just gonna introduce Christian science a bit because there's
(04:46):
a lot of bad publicity and just prejudice against it. Hey, quiet,
So I do have some dogs here that may be
barking in the background from time to time, and I
have some music going. This is have you heard of
(05:11):
hurts music? It's like healing sounds and there's different frequencies.
And you know, the theory is that like sound is
a vibration and that ourselves respond to sound and it
puts us in a mood, which is true, right, we
listen to music to put us in a certain mood.
(05:32):
Or seems as though a lot of entertainment is geared
toward excitement. It's like caffeine. Get up and go get
really excited, get really happy, and it's just like it's
kind of spassy, you know. And for a long time
I thought that's what happiness is. It's like that that
(05:56):
like breaking point of like oh my god, it's like
so great. It's like, oh always, it's like orgasmic, and
it's it's like that was the be all, end all,
And now I'm like, I just I don't. I think
it's a lot of energy that's wasted and trying to
be happy, and it's it's not productive. It's almost like
(06:16):
a drug where if we could, you know, just pace ourselves.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
And and not have like always trying to just get
high off of being super excited. It doesn't necessarily mean
you're a drug addict, Like you don't have to do
drugs to always be seeking that kind of rush and excitement.
It could be from you know, chasing love. A lot
of people you know, I've done this too, like chasing
love or gott to find the best best video game
(06:43):
where you gotta find gotta do something great. What are
you doing this weekend? You got to go do something great?
Speaker 1 (06:47):
And now I'm like I missed out on a lot
of joy in life by thinking that was happiness when
I should be like doing something instead of just chilling
out and just enjoying myself where I am and who
I'm with. And it doesn't have to be some you know,
(07:10):
Facebook type of thing that you write about. It's just
like just the kind of normal type of being alive,
like nothing, just everyday stuff, you know, like just finding
happiness and that everyday stuff. So that's where I'm at now,
(07:31):
and I find a.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Lot of these revelations, like the best revelations I've been
having lately are coming through Christian science, and so.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
I sound like I'm starting to evangelize and I don't
want to do that. Well, I was into it for
a long time, but I never actually attended the church.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
You know.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
Now I'm going like twice a week. I can't look
I mean, I look forward to going all the time.
It's like it's like it it quenches my spiritual thirst
and the people there are wise.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
And.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
I just feel like I finally found something that fits
with me because I've been going all over the place,
all different types of churches and just never really feeling
like it was something like I wanted to be a
part of and not for anything, not for any bad reason,
(08:38):
you know, nothing against people or anything. It just there
would always be something that came up and then it
just bothered me about maybe something I disagree with. So
in this week's lesson with this Christian Science Church, one
of the passages was about not coveting your neighbor's slave,
(09:04):
and coincidentally, I.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Also was watching this other philosopher Yusef. I forgot his name, anyways,
He's like, he's.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
A really good philosopher. I'm sorry, I don't I don't
really want to look up his name right now.
Speaker 2 (09:22):
But what is his name? Yusuf?
Speaker 1 (09:26):
He's into Ai and he's from Israel. I wish I
had somebody here to tell me. But okay, So I
was listening to him and he was he was saying
something about this as well. And so right after I
watched his video, I'm reading this week's lesson about the
same the same passage where it says don't covert your
(09:48):
neighbor's slave. And also you can kill your slave, or
if you if you wind up getting in a fight
and the slave gets hurt, you know you.
Speaker 2 (09:58):
Have to pay him.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
It's just all this weird, these weird rules, and I
got me thinking like this would be the point where
I turn away and say, Okay, I'm done with this.
Speaker 2 (10:10):
I'm gonna go look somewhere else.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
But for some reason, I'm sticking with it, and I'm
just not throwing everything away just because this passage bothers me.
So whenever I don't understand something, I pray and then
(10:32):
I put it aside, and then eventually I get a
revelation somewhere when I least expect it. I believe this
is how the creative mind works. Like if you ever
have to come up with some creative idea and you
are just like the hard It's like trying to find
your keys. It's like where did I put my keys?
And then the harder you try, the harder it is.
(10:54):
So it's the same thing like it's creativity is kind
of like a memory. Same thing with psychicability. It's kind
of like that memory too, where when you have the realization,
it feels like you remembered it and you can't remember
it by trying. You have to just have faith, like
you set your mind, you tell your It's like going
(11:15):
to sleep and telling your brain, I want to have
a lucid dream tonight, you can't. The more you want it,
the more your your body knows like, oh you want it,
that means you don't have it. But if you can
just say okay, I'm going to have it and boom,
set your clock, you can make yourself wake up, or
you can make yourself have a lucid dream. And I
believe that this is how creativity works also, so I'm
(11:40):
thinking about it and I had this realization from there
was a quote from it was Socrates, and he said
that barbarians are natural slaves because they are slaves to
their desires and their emotions, and people that have already
(12:08):
mastered their desires have a right and a duty to
enslave these people because otherwise they would be a danger
to themselves and society. So that's how they used to
manage these Today we would see these drug addicts and
criminals walking around and they're just always looking to be happy,
(12:30):
always looking to get their fix. In the past, these
people would be enslaved and they would be watched and
they could earn their freedom, just like Moses earned his freedom. Right,
was it Moses or Joseph. Yeah, Joseph earned his freedom
(12:53):
Joseph was enslaved and then he earned his freedom after
he became this like visionaries psychic for the Pharaoh, who
could interpret dreams, and he showed himself to be a
very good man.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
And so slave owners.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
If they were taught that, like Socrates said, if you
mistreat your slave, then you are no better than your slave,
because you can't control your emotions. So to be a
person who's corrupted is just like a slave who wants
to just they can't get enough like adrenaline, rushes and excitement.
(13:32):
So it would be proper to own a slave. And
this sounds terrible. It's like proper to own a slave
so that they don't hurt themselves. Or I sound like
such an elitist, and I never thought I would come
to this point, but because I meditated on it and
I create on it, like that's where I got this
(13:54):
revelation from. And there are other things in the Bible
I don't don't agree with, of course, But then it's like, well,
you know, this was a different time. I'm not saying
that it's good. It's like, yeah, I don't believe in
owning slaves. I just I just don't I think that
(14:16):
people should be free, and then if they everyone should
be born free. And then if they choose materialism, like
in Christian science, materialism is evil. It's created by man,
and it's not created by God or by spirit, but
it's created by man. And so if we worship materialism,
(14:37):
then we're slaves to that. And if it's a choice,
really there has to be laws that govern people, so
they don't, you know, go go too far out and
hurting each other. But Christian scientists believe that we are
(15:00):
made of spirit, and so we follow the spiritual laws,
but also the laws of the land, because it's not
like you're supposed to be a rebel rouser or anything
like that. So let's see what brings a person to.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Want to.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
Be a fervent follower of religion and start reading the Bible.
Speaker 2 (15:35):
I guess.
Speaker 1 (15:38):
Sorry about my does. I guess what brought me to
this place was extreme heartbreak and I thought my son
was gonna die in January and it it completely.
Speaker 2 (16:00):
Completely just changed my.
Speaker 1 (16:06):
Life and made me turn to deep prayer. And a
lot of things have happened since January. Now where this
is October, no September, No, it's October. Shee's okay, it's
October now, so okay, ten months gone by, and he's
not going to die, thank God. And a lot of
(16:30):
things have happened that are just complete miracles and putting
me in these places and teaching me these things, and
my life has forever changed. And I'm going to dedicate
the rest of my life to God. And so I
don't expect other people to to follow me. But I
(16:52):
just wanted to do a podcast just to put this
out there, because I have a lot of other podcasts
that go on about other religions and so forth, and
I just wanted to explain, why did you, like, you're
so liberal with other religions and now all of a sudden, no,
there's no other God before Jesus, and you become just
about Christian What happened? So, yeah, that's what happened. I
(17:16):
still have a habit of the tarot car though, I
just I like it's a tool for me to listen
because Christian science is different than Theosophy, which is another
religion I was into for a while. Theosophy is like freemasonry,
(17:39):
and it delves into some aspects of the occult where
it becomes kind of dark because it's all about like
you're using your own will, and that is kind of
a form of slavery too, because if you're always trying
(18:01):
to get what you want, then you're not really free
because you still are lacking and you want something. Whereas
if you are in this God consciousness, you have everything
and you are exactly where you're supposed to be, and
then God is using you. You've relinquished your.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Free will so that you could be a part of
this collective spirit which is God. And if God wants
you to do something, then you do it. And so
as a newbie, I have to like, well, what is
it that God wants? And I need to be able
to hear, and I have such better clairvoyance when I
(18:40):
use tarot cards and other tools like that, So I'm
not sure if that's something I should even divulge or
that should maybe keep that like kind of a secret.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
There are a lot of psychics use different things like
the use the Ouisi board, crystal balls, palm reading like
I like palm reading too, also looking at signs and
nature with birds. So I mean, if you're you know,
Christian scientists are allowed to listen to God and talk
to God through nature. So I think my tarot parts
are okay, Like I'm I'm only doing it so it's
(19:25):
like just a better way too. It's just a better
way for me to use my clairvoyance so I can
hear what God's saying.
Speaker 2 (19:35):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (19:36):
With that being said, I'm reading this manual too, of
these the rule book, and it says, okay, you're not
supposed to engage in seances and all this other mediumship,
and I'm like, shit, I like that, and it's it's
it's like tell It's like your parents telling you. I
don't want to hang out those friends anymore. Those friends
are a bad influence. It's like, I like my friends
you have, but they're a bad influence. Just stay away
(19:56):
from them. So I'm like, okay, I mean, I'm trying
to sort that out right now, but I don't know.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
I like all the.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
I like the spiritualism, and you're not supposed to engage
in that. So I got to give that up, and
all right, I'll do that. But I'm not.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
Kidding out my terrort cards yet.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
In the tarot card deck there the first one is
the zero is the fool, And that's where I began.
Speaker 2 (20:31):
In January.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
I kept pulling up the Full, and then I found
this book, Searching for the Full. It's a good book.
It's about the tarot. It's called Finding the Full. Finding
the Full, Yeah, and so basically it's there is life
after heartbreak, and the Full represents this stage in the
(20:53):
journey of life after heartbreak and it seems like the
world has ended when your heart is broken, but actually
it's just beginning because your heart breaks open and then
an infinite amount of possibilities emerge. And it's a lot
easier to just like not engage with that because it's
(21:14):
so overwhelming. It's like, okay, when your world comes crashing down,
it's like, you know, think of these people in the
Florida hurricane, Like they just lost everything, and now what
are they going to do? Where are they going to go?
How are they going to rebuild? It is the end,
but it's also a beginning. And so this is where
(21:35):
the fool is and that was that was the journey
that I was in as well. And the card shows
this hobo, this happy hobo, or maybe this hobo that
just doesn't care. He's walking defiantly with his head up
in the air, and he's just about to walk over
(21:56):
a cliff and he's carrying like a little sack and
you can see as nothing, he lost everything. And behind
him is this dog who's kind of maybe nipping at
his heels, barking at him, cheerfully swallowing him. Because to
a dog, any human, the poorest person is like a
king to a dog. Because people, they see people as
(22:19):
you could do whatever you want, so I'll follow you.
You can give me food, you can go get food.
Like they look at us like we're rock stars. But
the way we see ourselves is how what we're comparing
ourselves to. So it's all relative. But we could choose
to see ourselves as wow, we're on top of the world,
(22:42):
or we're just about to fall off a cliff. And
that's what the fool is too.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
So it's like, how do you see yourselves where you are?
Let's say, like you lost everything, you could, you know,
do some mental acrobats. And I think this is why
people like to turn to alcohol and stuff when they
lose everything, because it helps it helps temporarily shift your pective, perspective,
maybe give you your a little bit of a different
(23:07):
way of looking at things. So they're like, holy cow,
I just lost everything. Yeah, that's gonna be a truth
and you could sit there and dwell on it, But
how can you turn it around so that you could
see it a little differently?
Speaker 1 (23:21):
And that's what the fool is.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
And so.
Speaker 1 (23:27):
I'm not sure how this miracle happened because my son
was diagnosed with like terminal cancer and they said they
were certain that that's this is what it was. There's
like a rare form of bluesen cancer.
Speaker 3 (23:43):
Well, I I was hearing God tell me, no matter
what they say, it's not cancer, just don't believe it.
Speaker 2 (23:54):
It's not cancer. Don't believe it.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
So I went with that, and a lot of things happened.
I went to go we wanted to get a second opinion.
They wouldn't let us. And then we said we're gonna
go to a city of Hope in California, where his
father was treated when he was nineteen, and they were like, no,
(24:17):
you can't go there. They don't have children's cancer clinic.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
And they do.
Speaker 1 (24:20):
It's just a bunch of weird stuff. And then it
just got weirder and weird, and it's like, why are
you trying to prevent us so bad? They called CPS.
They're like, you got to come back here he needs chemotherapy,
radiation and it affected me and God just kept telling me, no,
don't listen to them. So we went to Texas. We
got a second opinion, and it turned out that the
(24:42):
mask that they biopsy turned out being an aneurysm. And
there were two. There was one his.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
AML that was there for a long time, and then
there was the aneurism, which shrunk by twenty five.
Speaker 1 (24:54):
Percent, so I know it wasn't when they when we left,
they said, oh no, now it's a real tumor. And
there's this policy if it's a Wilms tumor, you have
to have it, treat it. And so they could call
CPS and they could force you back into the hospital
because it's like eighty to ninety percent success rates if
it's if it's caught early. Otherwise it grows doubles in
(25:16):
size every two to four weeks. So after three weeks
it's shrunk by twenty five percent. And we just this
is how God works. Puts in this MD who is
in the emergency room, who just so happened to be
a nephrologist. He used to he was a radiologist. He's
from India. He was really started out as a radiologist.
Then he became a neufrologist, and now he's like an
(25:38):
MD working in the emergency clinic and the emergency hospital
at a Plano, Texas. Two years experience and a TSC clinic.
What are the odds? He's like, No, there was no
question it was an AML. It was embolized in January.
No question it was bleeding, hemorrhaging. Wilm's tumors don't hemorrhage.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
They don't have that. And it's.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
It's very easy to for if you know what you're doing,
if you know what you're looking at, you know it's
an AML because you see the fatty tissue and everything.
So there's an AML, and then there's this other thing
and he's like, it's hypodense. He's not sure what it is.
The biopsy says it's a Wilms tumor and an AML. Okay,
we come back, wind up calling the guy who embolized.
(26:26):
I call a bunch of nephrologists when I came back
here to try to get it handled because we did
not want to do radiation or anything like that, because
you know, it's like, if you don't.
Speaker 2 (26:37):
Need it, why would you, you know, take all this
other stuff.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Plus they want to give him these anti epileptic drugs,
which he's already shown how toxic side effects. They don't
work in sixty percent of children with tubers. Grossis AEDs
don't work for him.
Speaker 2 (26:51):
And they actually are toxic. So it's like, I don't
know why they keep doing this. It's like, once there's
a lot, it's really hard to change a law. Oh,
if you're if you hit your parent, your parent can
kill you. Like that's a law in the Bible, and
it cannot be removed. It's really hard to get a
(27:12):
diagnosis removed or a law removed. It's anyways.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
So in July, no, in June, we call the doctor
who implies that I can't get an appointment anywhere. I
got this Wilm's tumor on his record that's marring it.
And it's like nobody will even see us. So I'm like, hey,
can you look at it. It's not acting like it.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
He's having you know this son, he's still having the
symptoms of a bleeding AML, which is hypophylemic shock. And
you can't move or talk or drink water or anything.
And you got hammer, you know, your blood cloths peeing
out blood cloths and all this stuff, and I couldn't
get him any treatment because everyone's like, oh, it's a
(27:52):
Wilms tumor.
Speaker 1 (27:53):
So we call him or we're like, hey, can you
fix this because it's not a Wilm's tumor and you know,
and he's like he just called Well the CPS. CPS
was dropped because that lady said, oh, yeah, I know
these people. They've been calling on other parents to and
she saw we were just trying to get a second
opinion and stuff.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
So the CPS case was dropped. But now he's eighteen.
Now they call the APS people Adult Protective Services, and anyways,
I can't get any help. So a couple of weeks
go by.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
Finally I got to take the emergency room and I'm
so scared. I was so scared because I knew they
were gonna do chemotherapy, radiation and I have eileptic drugs,
and I was like, this is the end. We go
to the hospital and then that's the end. But then
God said, no, just take them.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
It's not the end. You can trust you know, you
can take them. It's gonna be fine. It was a
freaking nightmare and it was very hard. It turned out
to be fine, but it was really really hard, and
it was just one thing after another, or of a
bunch of strings of just God putting things in my path.
(29:08):
And it's like, thank you so much for doing this.
I'm still amazed.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
And how it all unfolded and how we got out of.
Speaker 2 (29:15):
There, how we got out of there alive.
Speaker 1 (29:17):
But we still got this core case looming over us
because even though there's nothing in place.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
He had to have that and affected me because by.
Speaker 1 (29:27):
The time, let's see, it was in August scheduled, and
affected me because it's just inflamed. You know, we couldn't
save it. Back in January, it was like five centimeters
or something, and then the aneurysm start bleeding into it
and super inflamed, and it's just it was the only
way I can get him treatment. I tried cryoblation. I
(29:49):
just we couldn't even leave the state because the APS people.
We had people pounding on our door yelling Mile's name,
calling us, telling us to get chemotherapy.
Speaker 2 (29:58):
Just crazy stuff.
Speaker 1 (30:00):
Him in the hospital right after them affected me. He's
laying on the bed. Guy comes in and he's like,
you know, looking for him. He's like, you have once
or throws the papers right on top of him. He's
like half conscious, you know, morphine drip. Just it's just
so freaking weird. And the politics in this state are
(30:21):
just crazy. I don't I never thought that this is.
Like I used to wonder, how the heck if you
were a parent and your kid got molested by a priest,
how would you deal with it? I thought, frick, I
don't know how anybody can hold me back from getting
revenge on that priest. But now this is even worse
(30:42):
because it's not just you know, fondling. This is like
actual freaking psychological damage, physical damage. And on top of it,
they want to separate us and take them away to
go live in this retirement home where.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
They already have like twelve I looked at the review.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
There's already twelve people families that are accusing the facility
of killing their family member for money to take.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
Because if you take custody of.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
Somebody like an elderly person, and you have in the
state has guardianship of them, they control all of their finances,
they and everything. They can't vote, they can't do anything.
They want to do this to my son.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
For what because because it turned out he didn't have cancer, Like,
what the heck, it's just the weird.
Speaker 1 (31:30):
It's not like I'm completely over this, but at least
he's alive, and at least that's all good, and his
blood work is good.
Speaker 2 (31:38):
There's no cancer and his lymph nose or anything like that.
It's just now I got.
Speaker 1 (31:44):
To deal with these state workers bothering us, trying to
they want to take away his rights, and it's.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
Like a David and Goliath type of thing. So I
don't know how this is gonna happen. I don't know
what's going to happen to me. If they get their way,
I'll be in.
Speaker 1 (32:02):
Jail and I will be in that facility and then
they'll start pumping them full of drugs and say that
they're right all along, but they're not. So I wanna
put that out there too. So getting back to the
tarot cards, I guess I'm gonna have to have a
(32:26):
talk with the with the with the the pastor there,
because I'm not sure if I should be using it
if that's considered mediumship. But isn't prayer also form a mediumship?
(32:49):
I mean, or just looking at signs, the birds and things.
Isn't that a former mediumship. Also, there's a law against
what do they call it mental.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
Something like it's it basically it's like misusing your your telepathy.
You're not supposed to pray for people unless they agree
to it. You can't you know how people say I'll
pray for you, you have to have their agreement.
Speaker 1 (33:27):
Do you w do they want you to pray for them?
You can't go around p even praying for people. And
you definitely can't wish people harm. And if anybody finds
out that you've had bad thoughts, because thoughts are things,
they're material things, Ideas are things. Thoughts are things, and
(33:48):
so having a thought of wanting to harm somebody can
get you kicked out of the church. So you think, like, oh,
how are they gonna know you're thinking that? But you
know these people, a lot of these people are really
psychic too, and they could just sense it.
Speaker 4 (34:04):
A lot of just regular people could sense things when
you know it will and stuff. They could get a
good sense of that. So now I'm like, I have
this internal struggle, like I want to you know, you
imagine if a priest molested your kid, that's bad. Wouldn't
you want to do something to them? Or if there
was like a kidnapper. Now they want a kidnap my son,
(34:27):
and they want their a bunch of liars. They deleted
the records, alter the records, lied about me. It's like
I'm having a really hard time trying to just keep
my thoughts in order so that I don't have evil thoughts.
Speaker 1 (34:42):
And that's where I am right now. So I wanted to.
Speaker 2 (34:45):
Read something before I go.
Speaker 1 (34:47):
I'm gonna just read something from this Christian science be
called this is the Sentinel now all, I guess it's
a worldwide religion, right, So every week everybody reads a
certain section of the Bible, like there's all these passages
(35:12):
and then they read we read Science and Health from
Mary Eddie Baker. I'm sorry, Mary Baker Eddie.
Speaker 2 (35:20):
And so it's called science and Health, and it's very metaphysical.
It's all about healing and I guess operating in this
state of consciousness where you are in spirit with God
(35:41):
so that you can do God's will. And God is
love and God is good and and I guess that's
the simple. That's it in a nutshell pretty much. So
disease does not come from God. Disease comes from comes
(36:03):
from man. Because God is immortal. And in Herbalism we
learn that too, that all disease begins on the spirit
level from turning away from it. So if there's a
discord in the spirit, say like person's not in alignment
(36:24):
with their spirit, it goes into the psychological area where
there's this is gon be the thoughts and the choices
and habits and so forth, or even just mind over matter,
that kind of thing, and then it once it reaches
down into the physical, well then it is like needs
to be treated with a physical otherwise you can treat
(36:49):
a psychological disease with psychology. And then but in Christian
science it's like, no, there is no material and so
everything can be treated through spirit. And I like that.
I like that actually better. Okay, it says here Psalms sixteen,
(37:17):
Psalms I'm sorry, Psalms one, thirty nine, twenty three to
twenty four. Search me, Oh God, and know my heart,
try me and know my thoughts, and see if there
be any wicked way in me, and lead me in
the way everlasting. In In the Bible, Bahand is the
Hebrew word for try, and it connotes the testing of
(37:42):
metal to determine its quality. This is an image that
occurs throughout the Bible. Job says, for example, when he
hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold, and
Proverbs seventeen three has the finding pot is for silver
and the furnace for gold. But the Lord trieth the hearts.
(38:05):
And this is alchemy where or if you're you know,
looking for rocks, and sometimes the friction. If you find
a like a gem, right a geode, sometimes you have
to break it. And people have to be broken too,
sometimes to see what to try them, to see what
(38:25):
they're made of. And in this breaking, having your heart broken,
your world crashing, that full archetype. This is what makes
us who we are. So it's like the fool's journey?
What are you gonna do when everything is taken away?
Who are you? And who you are is who you're
gonna become? God will call you. Are you gonna listen?
(38:52):
Thank you so much for joining me here today. I'm
Brainbow and I hope to see you next time.
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