October 9, 2019 • 15 mins
Champions Of Mind - Episode 226 - Building A Relationship With Life
Welcome to the Champions Of Mind podcast - game changing content from the UK’s leading success, mindset and motivational coaches Llewellyn and Rhys Davies and James Burtt.
This week Rhys shares some lessons, very openly and honestly, that he learned from spending time with his beautiful step-daughter recently. He explains how building a genuine relationship based on solid foundations can take time, as is the case with how you build a relationship with yourself in your own life too.
Check this one out now as it is a real, raw and open-hearted share of Rhys’ personal experience in real time and let us know what you think of this episode by tagging us on Insta Stories https://www.instagram.com/championsofmind/
For more tangible, actionable and usable mindset and motivational content head to the official Champions Of Mind website now via www.championsofmind.com
Welcome to the Champions Of Mind podcast - game changing content from the UK’s leading success, mindset and motivational coaches Llewellyn and Rhys Davies and James Burtt.
This week Rhys shares some lessons, very openly and honestly, that he learned from spending time with his beautiful step-daughter recently. He explains how building a genuine relationship based on solid foundations can take time, as is the case with how you build a relationship with yourself in your own life too.
Check this one out now as it is a real, raw and open-hearted share of Rhys’ personal experience in real time and let us know what you think of this episode by tagging us on Insta Stories https://www.instagram.com/championsofmind/
For more tangible, actionable and usable mindset and motivational content head to the official Champions Of Mind website now via www.championsofmind.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:04):
Welcome to the Champions of Mind podcast, weekly content to help you take your
mindset, business, health and wealthto the next level. Starring the UK's
most in demand action taking coaches Llewellynand Riese Davies with host James Birds.
(00:27):
I've had a relaxing weekend with mystepdaughter Florence. I took away to autun
Towers and I took her away becauseyou know, I think after three years,
I really have to up my roleas a stepdad and commit a little
bit more, try a little bitharder, and you know, start to
(00:47):
build our relationship past you know,me just being here and being present and
you know, just being like havinga role in the house. So that
was a massive effort for me.And it's been man, because I've been
away from work. I've been awayfrom business, I said Louie and James
and message saying, look, I'mnot really too interested in business this weekend.
A lot of my time and energyhas to be focused on Florence,
(01:11):
you know, and that's me operatingon my fucking panic zone. You know,
kids are hard, full stop,but they're even harder when they're not
your own. And I'm gonna bereally fucking transparent. You know, sometimes
you know, people look at kidsas a representation of you, a representation
(01:33):
of a bond, a trust,a relationship that you had with someone,
and you know, being a stepfather, you don't get that privilege. So
there's lots of emotional barriers that weboth must overcome, you know, you
know, to move forward. Andthat's what I'm working towards behind the scenes,
away from you know, me trainingin any gym and you know,
(01:55):
delivering content. That's my next goal. But what was being with Floss away
from a mom. It made methink about life in general. And you
know, you have a five yearold girl that talks a lot about her
dad that doesn't really get me inregards to, yeah, you're my steppie,
(02:17):
but doesn't really get you know,the energy in the effort that goes
into becoming a stepdad. Because thenthe day she's fucking five years of age
and just over forty eight hours afterme being around dad, you know,
no fucking mom, no fucking granddad, no fucking auntie, fucking boo,
just me. Ree David Davis,I saw her in a different light,
(02:42):
and I saw her in a differentlight because I got to be me around
that you know what I say goes. You know, I will speak to
you how I see fit. Youknow you follow my rules and if you're
good, you know we're going tomove forward. And the response that I
had was really really positive in therespect off she was really relaxed and she
behaved like a little gem. AndI thought, how can I make this
(03:06):
relevant to the people that are movingforward in life? And it's really really
simple, it's quite powerful. Infact, building a relationship with life is
like building a relationship with another humanbeing. But off the back of,
you know, my experience with mystepdaughter, you don't want to talk about
building a relationship with kids. Lifeis awkward and life can be quite juvenile.
(03:31):
And what I mean by saying lifecan be quite juvenile is right.
Life fox around with us every singleday. And what life does is that
when you put any intention out intothe universe, when you give life an
order, when you tell a lifeto do something, it's it's going to
(03:52):
test your resistance. It's gonna makeyou question whether you can stand by your
words. That when we tell akid brush your teeth, tie your shoes
up, go and wash your face, tie you up your toys, you
know what. You have to tella lot of them two or three times
before they pay any attention because they'retoo busy watching television, they're too busy
(04:15):
on their eyepad, they're too busyplaying games. And it's only the third
and fourth and fifth time that yousay it they start to pay attention.
And quite often it's the third andfourth from fifth time your tone changes and
they look at you a certain wayand they think, fuck, they ain't
play around, and they start todo what you say. And I thought,
(04:36):
this is very apparent to how wecan build a relationship so that life
is responsive to your demands. Right, Because so many people are putting out
into the universe that they want tobecome successful. So many people are demanding
success from life. So many peopleare demanding a pay rise, so many
people are demanding a fantastic relationship.So many people are demanding that they want
(05:00):
success. But the people are demandingit in a tone that suggests life isn't
going to listen. People are askinglife a question but framing it as a
demand. People are asking life aquestion but framing it as a demand.
(05:25):
They have no intention behind what theysay, but they say it because they
feel it's morally the right thing todo. If we study the pitch,
the frequency, the tone, andthe authority of nature behind one which commands
stuff from life, you will soonbe able to see the difference between a
(05:49):
frugasee which is a fake, andsomeone who actually means what they say.
You can get two sets of parents, two sets of adults, and one
can say to a kid, stopplaying around. Then the next person can
say, behavior, stop playing aroundnow, and the child will listen to
(06:15):
the second person because the second personhas a demeanor. The second person has
an authoritative nature that suggests, don'tfucking play games with me. Don't play
games with me, because you cantell by the way that I'm looking at
you, you can tell by thepitch in my voice, my tone,
(06:36):
and my frequency, and the authoritativedemeanor that one is conveying I'm not here
to play fucking games. And froma coaching perspective, from a business perspective,
I can just see how so manypeople are are failing to build sustainable
(07:01):
relationships with life that will consistently rewardthese motherfuckers because their frequency is hot and
cold, because their intentions hot andcold, because their authority is hot and
cold. Because how they pose astatement is really an insecure question. So
(07:25):
I want to give you a coupleof tips this evening on how I feel
that you can move forward and buildinga positive relationship and understand it with life.
It is firstly, life will onlyreally understand what it is you want
from it when you demand it withan authoritative nature. You can't just demand
(07:47):
verbally, and you definitely can't justdemand physically. Because you know, there's
a lot of people that take action, man, and there's a lot of
people that apply themself to every singleday. But of all, always coach
people about the satellite dish that Ibelieve in the universe, right, and
it floats around in the sky upabove, and rather than listening to what
(08:09):
you say, rather than looking atyour intentions and how you act and how
you apply yourself, this satellite,okay, has the ability to scan your
internal dialogue, so what you sayto yourself every single day, right.
But not only does it have theability to scan your internal dialogue, it
has the ability to pick up thefrequency, the pitch, and the tone
(08:33):
in which you speak to yourself.So if you're speaking to yourself in a
soft nature, I really want toachieve my goals today. You know,
I can definitely do this. I'mthe best. It's not really going to
take you too fucking seriously. However, if you're speaking to yourself in a
tone and a pitch and a frequencylike we do our kids when they're misbehaving,
(08:58):
with an authoritative nature, and wehave that, you know, authoritative,
assertive demeanor, and there's a genuinealignment between your internal belief system and
the aura in which you are conveying, the life is eventually got to start
(09:18):
to take you seriously. But moreimportantly, check this sun. Check this
sun. It begins to respect you, it begins to admire you, it
begins to really appreciate what it isyou stand for because regardless of your authoritative
demeanor, regardless of your statements andyour demands, life knows you're only asking
(09:41):
from it so you can better yourselfand better life itself, because you know
what, like like when we havekids, man, you know, we
need to be in a position togive, you know, give emotionally,
give advice and give love. Andlife's no different. You know, life
reward the people that want to givesomething to life. You know, if
(10:03):
you want to give life positivity andthen give it. If you want to
give life motivation, they give you. If you want to give life enthusism,
and give it. If you wantto give life knowledge, then give
it. But the moment you areinconsistent with your tone, pitch and frequency,
demeanor and your internal belief system,you're going to break the relationship that
(10:24):
you try to build, You're goingto break it. It's not gonna work.
It's not going to be sustainable.And when my partner, when my
filance they come back today, Isaid, look, I just have a
quick discussion. I said, Ithink it's very important that you allow me,
you know, to speak to Florencehow I see fit as a man,
as a stepfather, you know,as a fucking RP partitioner, because
(10:46):
when she's with me, you know, she's absolutely golden, you know,
And I think that, you know, sometimes when I'm under the same ruth
as you, ruth as you,I feel like I can't really speak to
her the way that I think's necessarybecause she's your fucking kid, and you
will frown like if I'm being alittle bit too harsh. And she said,
(11:07):
no, I get that. Iget that. I get that,
I said, because at the endof the day. I'm only going to
speak to people in a way whichI think is going to get a positive
response to how this person move forward. And again, if I was to
make it about life and how youbuild a relationship with life, you can't
speak to life differently in different environments. You can't speak to life differently in
different circumstances. You can't speak tolife differently because you feel different. It
(11:33):
requires consistency, It requires an understandingof you know what you want to give
it, and it means you needto give it every single fucking day,
regardless you know whether you feel likeit or not. You know, one
of the hardest things before being astepfather is you know, not taking out
your emotions on a kid when youhave an argument with the fiance because they're
(11:56):
attached. It's tough, and I'mbeing very transparent. And what I love
about life is, you know,so many people fail to continue to build
that relationship with life because I've notbeen paid enough, or because they feel
a little bit fucking sick, orbecause they're in a little bit fucking debt,
or because these motherfuckers are a littlebit fat. You know, you
know, people are failing to beconsistent in how they want to continue to
(12:22):
build their relationship. So I've nevergiven this content before, I've never spoke
about it. You know, Iliterally just from my experience over the last
forty eight hours, you know,I thought I would kind of personify,
you know, my experience with YoungFloss and make it a valuable coaching to
for people. It's that, youknow, it takes years for life to
(12:43):
trust who you are, It takesyears for life to respect who you are.
It takes years for life to reallyunderstand, you know, what role
you have to play in that relationship. And you know, I just see
so many people that blowhot and cold, go from left to right, you
know, one minute, a fuckingtrade there, next minute and they don't
invest there. Next minute they're fuckingcoach, Like, slow down and get
(13:05):
a fucking grip of yourself, youmotherfuckers, because life is going to be
like this, Well, which oneare you? What the fuck do you
want to give me? And howlong you going to stay around for?
Because you've been in three different placesat the moment, you're cheating on me
with different things. And if youever type in the Terrible Twins on YouTube,
(13:26):
you'll see my hustle like transparently forthe last ten years. You know,
I've been delivering content for the lastten years. And when I look
at the you know, the sevenfigures that I have made, especially in
the last sixteen months, it's allreally relevant because I'm the most consistent man
you've ever watched, and you don'tknow it yet because you've not fucking done
your research. But the moment youactually research, you know what I've actually
(13:50):
done and the time and the energythat I've put into building an alarm brand.
I actually feel underpaid and undervalued.But that's okay because the tables are
turning. You know, my relationshipwith life is is very clear. It
has rewarded me based on where Ithink I am, which is just over
(14:11):
a million coup one plut six millionquid, right, which is fine.
I feel like it's fucking massively underpaid me. So I'm about to show
life you know how much I loveit. I'm about to show life you
know how committed I am to lifeand giving it my expertise, my knowledge,
my energy, my demeanor, myvision. And only when life feels
(14:33):
like it's ready to reward me atwill and who am I to one otherwise,
I'm just going to leave that there. Please feel free to tag me
piece up. Thank you for listeningto this episode of the Champions of Mind
podcast. If you'd like to supportthe show, please subscribe on it guns,
(14:54):
Spotify, stitch Yeah, SoundCloud,or Google Clay. Share this episode
with one friend that you think itmight help, and give the Champions of
My Team a five star review whereveryou download your podcasts
Welcome to the Champions of Mind podcast, weekly content to help you take your
mindset, business, health and wealthto the next level. Starring the UK's
most in demand action taking coaches Llewellynand Riese Davies with host James Birds.
(00:27):
I've had a relaxing weekend with mystepdaughter Florence. I took away to autun
Towers and I took her away becauseyou know, I think after three years,
I really have to up my roleas a stepdad and commit a little
bit more, try a little bitharder, and you know, start to
(00:47):
build our relationship past you know,me just being here and being present and
you know, just being like havinga role in the house. So that
was a massive effort for me.And it's been man, because I've been
away from work. I've been awayfrom business, I said Louie and James
and message saying, look, I'mnot really too interested in business this weekend.
A lot of my time and energyhas to be focused on Florence,
(01:11):
you know, and that's me operatingon my fucking panic zone. You know,
kids are hard, full stop,but they're even harder when they're not
your own. And I'm gonna bereally fucking transparent. You know, sometimes
you know, people look at kidsas a representation of you, a representation
(01:33):
of a bond, a trust,a relationship that you had with someone,
and you know, being a stepfather, you don't get that privilege. So
there's lots of emotional barriers that weboth must overcome, you know, you
know, to move forward. Andthat's what I'm working towards behind the scenes,
away from you know, me trainingin any gym and you know,
(01:55):
delivering content. That's my next goal. But what was being with Floss away
from a mom. It made methink about life in general. And you
know, you have a five yearold girl that talks a lot about her
dad that doesn't really get me inregards to, yeah, you're my steppie,
(02:17):
but doesn't really get you know,the energy in the effort that goes
into becoming a stepdad. Because thenthe day she's fucking five years of age
and just over forty eight hours afterme being around dad, you know,
no fucking mom, no fucking granddad, no fucking auntie, fucking boo,
just me. Ree David Davis,I saw her in a different light,
(02:42):
and I saw her in a differentlight because I got to be me around
that you know what I say goes. You know, I will speak to
you how I see fit. Youknow you follow my rules and if you're
good, you know we're going tomove forward. And the response that I
had was really really positive in therespect off she was really relaxed and she
behaved like a little gem. AndI thought, how can I make this
(03:06):
relevant to the people that are movingforward in life? And it's really really
simple, it's quite powerful. Infact, building a relationship with life is
like building a relationship with another humanbeing. But off the back of,
you know, my experience with mystepdaughter, you don't want to talk about
building a relationship with kids. Lifeis awkward and life can be quite juvenile.
(03:31):
And what I mean by saying lifecan be quite juvenile is right.
Life fox around with us every singleday. And what life does is that
when you put any intention out intothe universe, when you give life an
order, when you tell a lifeto do something, it's it's going to
(03:52):
test your resistance. It's gonna makeyou question whether you can stand by your
words. That when we tell akid brush your teeth, tie your shoes
up, go and wash your face, tie you up your toys, you
know what. You have to tella lot of them two or three times
before they pay any attention because they'retoo busy watching television, they're too busy
(04:15):
on their eyepad, they're too busyplaying games. And it's only the third
and fourth and fifth time that yousay it they start to pay attention.
And quite often it's the third andfourth from fifth time your tone changes and
they look at you a certain wayand they think, fuck, they ain't
play around, and they start todo what you say. And I thought,
(04:36):
this is very apparent to how wecan build a relationship so that life
is responsive to your demands. Right, Because so many people are putting out
into the universe that they want tobecome successful. So many people are demanding
success from life. So many peopleare demanding a pay rise, so many
people are demanding a fantastic relationship.So many people are demanding that they want
(05:00):
success. But the people are demandingit in a tone that suggests life isn't
going to listen. People are askinglife a question but framing it as a
demand. People are asking life aquestion but framing it as a demand.
(05:25):
They have no intention behind what theysay, but they say it because they
feel it's morally the right thing todo. If we study the pitch,
the frequency, the tone, andthe authority of nature behind one which commands
stuff from life, you will soonbe able to see the difference between a
(05:49):
frugasee which is a fake, andsomeone who actually means what they say.
You can get two sets of parents, two sets of adults, and one
can say to a kid, stopplaying around. Then the next person can
say, behavior, stop playing aroundnow, and the child will listen to
(06:15):
the second person because the second personhas a demeanor. The second person has
an authoritative nature that suggests, don'tfucking play games with me. Don't play
games with me, because you cantell by the way that I'm looking at
you, you can tell by thepitch in my voice, my tone,
(06:36):
and my frequency, and the authoritativedemeanor that one is conveying I'm not here
to play fucking games. And froma coaching perspective, from a business perspective,
I can just see how so manypeople are are failing to build sustainable
(07:01):
relationships with life that will consistently rewardthese motherfuckers because their frequency is hot and
cold, because their intentions hot andcold, because their authority is hot and
cold. Because how they pose astatement is really an insecure question. So
(07:25):
I want to give you a coupleof tips this evening on how I feel
that you can move forward and buildinga positive relationship and understand it with life.
It is firstly, life will onlyreally understand what it is you want
from it when you demand it withan authoritative nature. You can't just demand
(07:47):
verbally, and you definitely can't justdemand physically. Because you know, there's
a lot of people that take action, man, and there's a lot of
people that apply themself to every singleday. But of all, always coach
people about the satellite dish that Ibelieve in the universe, right, and
it floats around in the sky upabove, and rather than listening to what
(08:09):
you say, rather than looking atyour intentions and how you act and how
you apply yourself, this satellite,okay, has the ability to scan your
internal dialogue, so what you sayto yourself every single day, right.
But not only does it have theability to scan your internal dialogue, it
has the ability to pick up thefrequency, the pitch, and the tone
(08:33):
in which you speak to yourself.So if you're speaking to yourself in a
soft nature, I really want toachieve my goals today. You know,
I can definitely do this. I'mthe best. It's not really going to
take you too fucking seriously. However, if you're speaking to yourself in a
tone and a pitch and a frequencylike we do our kids when they're misbehaving,
(08:58):
with an authoritative nature, and wehave that, you know, authoritative,
assertive demeanor, and there's a genuinealignment between your internal belief system and
the aura in which you are conveying, the life is eventually got to start
(09:18):
to take you seriously. But moreimportantly, check this sun. Check this
sun. It begins to respect you, it begins to admire you, it
begins to really appreciate what it isyou stand for because regardless of your authoritative
demeanor, regardless of your statements andyour demands, life knows you're only asking
(09:41):
from it so you can better yourselfand better life itself, because you know
what, like like when we havekids, man, you know, we
need to be in a position togive, you know, give emotionally,
give advice and give love. Andlife's no different. You know, life
reward the people that want to givesomething to life. You know, if
(10:03):
you want to give life positivity andthen give it. If you want to
give life motivation, they give you. If you want to give life enthusism,
and give it. If you wantto give life knowledge, then give
it. But the moment you areinconsistent with your tone, pitch and frequency,
demeanor and your internal belief system,you're going to break the relationship that
(10:24):
you try to build, You're goingto break it. It's not gonna work.
It's not going to be sustainable.And when my partner, when my
filance they come back today, Isaid, look, I just have a
quick discussion. I said, Ithink it's very important that you allow me,
you know, to speak to Florencehow I see fit as a man,
as a stepfather, you know,as a fucking RP partitioner, because
(10:46):
when she's with me, you know, she's absolutely golden, you know,
And I think that, you know, sometimes when I'm under the same ruth
as you, ruth as you,I feel like I can't really speak to
her the way that I think's necessarybecause she's your fucking kid, and you
will frown like if I'm being alittle bit too harsh. And she said,
(11:07):
no, I get that. Iget that. I get that,
I said, because at the endof the day. I'm only going to
speak to people in a way whichI think is going to get a positive
response to how this person move forward. And again, if I was to
make it about life and how youbuild a relationship with life, you can't
speak to life differently in different environments. You can't speak to life differently in
different circumstances. You can't speak tolife differently because you feel different. It
(11:33):
requires consistency, It requires an understandingof you know what you want to give
it, and it means you needto give it every single fucking day,
regardless you know whether you feel likeit or not. You know, one
of the hardest things before being astepfather is you know, not taking out
your emotions on a kid when youhave an argument with the fiance because they're
(11:56):
attached. It's tough, and I'mbeing very transparent. And what I love
about life is, you know,so many people fail to continue to build
that relationship with life because I've notbeen paid enough, or because they feel
a little bit fucking sick, orbecause they're in a little bit fucking debt,
or because these motherfuckers are a littlebit fat. You know, you
know, people are failing to beconsistent in how they want to continue to
(12:22):
build their relationship. So I've nevergiven this content before, I've never spoke
about it. You know, Iliterally just from my experience over the last
forty eight hours, you know,I thought I would kind of personify,
you know, my experience with YoungFloss and make it a valuable coaching to
for people. It's that, youknow, it takes years for life to
(12:43):
trust who you are, It takesyears for life to respect who you are.
It takes years for life to reallyunderstand, you know, what role
you have to play in that relationship. And you know, I just see
so many people that blowhot and cold, go from left to right, you
know, one minute, a fuckingtrade there, next minute and they don't
invest there. Next minute they're fuckingcoach, Like, slow down and get
(13:05):
a fucking grip of yourself, youmotherfuckers, because life is going to be
like this, Well, which oneare you? What the fuck do you
want to give me? And howlong you going to stay around for?
Because you've been in three different placesat the moment, you're cheating on me
with different things. And if youever type in the Terrible Twins on YouTube,
(13:26):
you'll see my hustle like transparently forthe last ten years. You know,
I've been delivering content for the lastten years. And when I look
at the you know, the sevenfigures that I have made, especially in
the last sixteen months, it's allreally relevant because I'm the most consistent man
you've ever watched, and you don'tknow it yet because you've not fucking done
your research. But the moment youactually research, you know what I've actually
(13:50):
done and the time and the energythat I've put into building an alarm brand.
I actually feel underpaid and undervalued.But that's okay because the tables are
turning. You know, my relationshipwith life is is very clear. It
has rewarded me based on where Ithink I am, which is just over
(14:11):
a million coup one plut six millionquid, right, which is fine.
I feel like it's fucking massively underpaid me. So I'm about to show
life you know how much I loveit. I'm about to show life you
know how committed I am to lifeand giving it my expertise, my knowledge,
my energy, my demeanor, myvision. And only when life feels
(14:33):
like it's ready to reward me atwill and who am I to one otherwise,
I'm just going to leave that there. Please feel free to tag me
piece up. Thank you for listeningto this episode of the Champions of Mind
podcast. If you'd like to supportthe show, please subscribe on it guns,
(14:54):
Spotify, stitch Yeah, SoundCloud,or Google Clay. Share this episode
with one friend that you think itmight help, and give the Champions of
My Team a five star review whereveryou download your podcasts
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