Poked My Finger - Chewing The Cud - S06E22

This is Chewing The Cud! Your weekly LGBTQIA+ Chat Show! 

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:15):
You're watching Chewing the Cud with Lee Robertson and Mike
Benyon Groan.

Speaker 2 (00:21):
I said, you're going to need to wash that because
any thcker and you can spread it on the Jacob screen. Cracker. Hello,
you're watching Chewing the Cud, your lighthearted weekly look at
the world using a pair of drag glasses. I'm Lee
Robertson and with me today is a man who once
got so hungry he apparently out a spider wriggled and
tiggled and jiggled inside him it.

Speaker 1 (00:42):
Mike, Okay, I didn't choose to eat the spider. The
spider chose to nest itself when you coughed it out.
So I went to sleep. I woke up choking, unable
to breathe because a spider had lodged itself in my throat.

Speaker 2 (00:56):
How big was the spider?

Speaker 1 (00:57):
Well, it came out about that big.

Speaker 2 (00:59):
Was it a huntsman?

Speaker 1 (01:00):
Yes, it was a huntsman, so jumping huntsman spider? Why
would you do that? Oh?

Speaker 2 (01:06):
It was inc Wincy the Garry's take. Did did it survive?

Speaker 1 (01:17):
Not me throwing it up?

Speaker 2 (01:18):
No, drowning your acids? Yes, okay. Stories it's a film
like that a short film Rachinophobia that's made.

Speaker 1 (01:31):
One are they they're choking?

Speaker 2 (01:35):
And what have you got?

Speaker 1 (01:36):
Well this week I've got a story about it evolutionary change,
and then we're going to play a little game.

Speaker 2 (01:42):
And then we're going to get all scientific in that
science that is on screen. Now you can see our
contact details. It's at the cud TV on your social
media and if you want to catch up with previous episodes,
you can almost bringe us on your YouTube but for
chewing the cord and you can see the names of.

Speaker 1 (01:56):
People have reached out and touched our souls going along
the bottom of the screen. Now it's time for Lee
and the show is.

Speaker 2 (02:09):
Were you a fan? Are you where you? Are you?
Possible in the future going to be a pano strictly
the dancing.

Speaker 1 (02:15):
Show and I'm aware of it. I liked it like
the first season. I went, oh, this is good and
it's like it's the same ship again.

Speaker 2 (02:22):
Yeah. Then Bruce died and oh rest is peace. Godlan
to have a very successful career as a as a
chairbel mm hmm. Anyway, do you remember the celebrity chef
John Waite who starred in I think it was last

(02:46):
year or the year before strictly same sex partner, he
had a liquid bomb, a good bum.

Speaker 1 (02:56):
It's not you.

Speaker 2 (02:58):
Rude. So he's he's in the news at the moment
because he's claimed that he's been dropped from a brand deal. Okay,
because he's he's launched an only fans profile. Okay, so
we've got a picture of him here, I think with
his with his partner when he did he did strictly
his husband, not that's not his husband. He does have

(03:19):
a husband, but that's not his husband. That was his
dance partner. Do you think, oh, we've got a shadow
of a doubt. It's the curse of strictly spum each
other and the ladies and the men and the boys
and the girls like a song with that, isn't it. Anyway,
he's he's kind of talked to social media because why

(03:39):
else to say that he has allegedly been dumped by
the car brand Pergio. Okay, because he has set up
an only fans account. So he's like said, are you
looking for a man that will lasts longer than this car? Well,
that would be hard to find, he says, as forgive me, Persia,
for I have sinned. So what he's saying is is

(04:01):
that when Pergeo UK found out about his only fans,
they asked me to no longer post about their brand
and to give the car back. Okay, So so he
agreed and he said, disclaimed me. This is just a laughing.
It's actually a decent car, but so much for being
an inclusive brand. So what he's kind of like saying
is because he's posting quite explicit sexual gay content on

(04:24):
his only fans, they've kind of like gone, no doubt,
take pictures if you're Willy in our car. Okay, I
don't think you take pictures of that's that's an example
of a sort of I think then you think he
takes him off in Yeah, so he's so he he
was kind of It was about ten years ago that

(04:44):
he did Celebrity Bay Path that made him a celebrity.
They made him a celebrity, and then he kind of
did lots of cooking shows and stuff and he was
on Steph's Pack Lunch for a while and then that finished.
So then he decided to kind of stick at what
are you laughing? That finished finished, and then he took
a step back from being in celebrity and opened his

(05:07):
own kind brand of baking online baking thing. So you
got to go to the shop, you order online and
it gets delivered. It's called rough Puff Brownies. No no,

(05:28):
so that's him and his husband and that's their their brownie. Yeah,
so there you go. They they take a lot of
money from only fans, so certain celebrities can do Kerry Katonah,
Lily Allen text photographers of her feet. Okay, so they

(05:50):
go just saying, do you have an only fans?

Speaker 1 (05:52):
I do you have an only fan? It's me.

Speaker 2 (05:56):
Oh that's sad. It's just a a bit now, okay, yeah. Yeah.
Have you seen a film called Rotting in the Sun. No, no, no, no.
So that was a twenty twenty three black comedy thriller
which was all about somebody trying to succeed in the

(06:17):
art world whilst habitually taking ketamin, which is nice. I
would know if it's we wouldn't recommend it. And then
he meets some sort of social it's an lgbt Q
plus yeah he does.

Speaker 1 (06:33):
Yeah, it's dead.

Speaker 2 (06:34):
But he has an erection when he was dead. That's
not common. That's not uncommon from my experience or the
dead people like. So the guy that was in the
film who played the main character, has released his is
debut album, Jordan First Man, not what I thought it was,

(07:00):
First Man. So this is the cover of his album,
which apparently in New York, where it's been quite heavily promoted,
homosexual gentlemen have been stealing the poster, okay, to put
up in their bedrooms or bathrooms or kitchens or wherever
room in the house that they would like. And apparently

(07:23):
it's it's quite quite suggestif that's quite a suggestive picture.
It is quite suggested. Although you can't see anything redy doody.

Speaker 1 (07:31):
That stops it being so if you can see it
stops it being suggestive, it then becomes explicit pornographic.

Speaker 2 (07:36):
Yeah, so it's kind of like said, I'm just put
words to lyrics of my friends, things that my friends
say to each other. And it's parental advisory, okay, because
it is very rude. But like it says that the
promotional posters have been disappearing on streets. I've never heard
of him. I appreciate Harry Cleavage, but that's just me.

(08:03):
Do you appreciate mind what that's about? News? Okay, you
probably you'll probably be into this Okay, Ricky Martin, are
you in general, dow where do we stand on Ricky Martin?

Speaker 1 (08:18):
Well squatted themselves.

Speaker 2 (08:19):
Oh, he's in his like Daddy era, isn't it is
Ricky Martin. He's going on tour in Australia. Okay, imminently
in the next few months. That's not him on tour.
That's him just by his pool with his budgy smugglers on.
So he's been loads of interviews, as people do when
they've got something to promote, and he's been talking about

(08:41):
how he is very open minded when it comes to
not safe for work acts. Okay, So I don't think
that means that, you know, like shitting on someone's desk
or they could be depends what you're into. He's a
he's a fan of a particular thing. Okay, what do
you think it might be?

Speaker 1 (09:02):
Mhm?

Speaker 2 (09:04):
What's what's the fetish? What is it? Though? It's not?

Speaker 1 (09:09):
Okay, apparently it's not.

Speaker 2 (09:11):
Isn't that when you I'm not gonna say it, what
do you think it is it? When you fetish going
up inside somebody, in them, inside them, keep saying inside them,
you eat them with your willy. I don't know what
I'm saying.

Speaker 1 (09:32):
What what what gets Ricky Martin often, let's just let's
just so.

Speaker 2 (09:37):
Ricky Martin doesn't like it's fantasize of eating somebody with
his well, I mean, I don't know. He's a fan
of the golden shower. Okay, yeah, yeah, he says. He
says it's very open minded. He likes nothing more than
a golden shower like acid rain. He says, I've done

(09:57):
it before. In the shower it's like set it. You know,
the temperature of your body and the shower water. It's
very different. And he also has a bit of a
foot fetish okay, which is that's his picture of his
foot there his foot, Yeah, in the bath tattooed. Yeah,

(10:18):
I'm not. I'm not. I'm not convinced. I don't like
that tattoo. He says. I'm open to everything. There are
moments for soft, gentle sex, and there are moments for
a good spank in the butt mm hmm. Loving what
you have to say. No, I'm not saying it. I'm

(10:42):
not saying it. I'm not saying.

Speaker 1 (10:47):
We're going to have to do this.

Speaker 2 (10:49):
I don't know. I don't know what I was going
to say. Lie, so because he's really revealed that he
has a bit of a foot fetish. He's been inundated
with suggest stiff dms and pictures of feet, but he's
not mad about it. Okay, so there'll be go that's
an insighting. But you know what saying, if you sprinkle,
when you tink, Cole, be a sweetie, piss on your face.

(11:13):
At the end of the week, show Business.

Speaker 1 (11:15):
Proving again that everyone is a fetish to someone.

Speaker 2 (11:18):
Thanks flatly, stay right there because coming up after the
short bright, we've got a date with the unusual side
of the news with Mike in the buzz Welcome back,
and you're watching Chewing the Cord. Now, this is the
part of the show where we look into what he's

(11:40):
pressed control and d on. It's Mike with the.

Speaker 1 (11:43):
Buzz control and d It's quite technical for you.

Speaker 2 (11:53):
I just read what was on the screen.

Speaker 1 (11:54):
Yeah, how do you feel about body fragrances?

Speaker 2 (12:00):
Mean?

Speaker 1 (12:00):
While, how do you feel about body fragrances?

Speaker 2 (12:03):
I don't understand a word. You just said, body.

Speaker 1 (12:04):
Fair, body fragrances, body fragrances? Sorry, what was having a straight?

Speaker 2 (12:09):
Literally? Just how do you feel about body? There? Almonds?
Can anybody else taste almonds. That's how do I feel
about body fragrances, the natural fragrance of the.

Speaker 1 (12:25):
Body, whatever I feel about smells.

Speaker 2 (12:31):
Because it's I've been caught out before when you've got
gone right and I've got't get them in. So is
it body fragrances that you buy in spray on? Okay?
Are they different from is that different from an after show?

Speaker 3 (12:48):
For as the story about Lush's trying to just trying
to limit of a benefit concept to it, right, Lush,
they named three of their bath bombs.

Speaker 2 (13:03):
Now, then this is going to be interesting if you
can say.

Speaker 1 (13:07):
Right, the thermal Waves bath bomb is now called diversity okay, Uh,
Secura bath bomb is now called equity, and American Cream
is now called inclusion. Okay. So this is a call
back to the Orange What's It? And his banning of

(13:29):
de I? Okay, So what Lussia does said, so you're
banning DEI, We're going to name things, do I?

Speaker 2 (13:35):
Okay?

Speaker 1 (13:36):
Diversity inclusions in America? Yeah, worldwide, worldwide because the Orange
What's It is impacting those all worldwide. So they started
renaming in January this year and has expanded globally up
until March. So now all of those have been rebranded.

Speaker 2 (13:55):
I get I get the I get the idea behind it.
But however, I don't think Donald Trump gives a flying
fart whether a bath bomb is called diversity.

Speaker 1 (14:07):
What if he's one of his favorites, Well, that's a
different matter, isn't it. What if you're sending Melinda out
for a bath bomb Melinda whatever his name of his
wife is, okay, what's her.

Speaker 2 (14:21):
Name, Milania Millennia, I call him Melinda Melinda. I don't
get the impression that the orange cheetah is a it's
a particular bathbomb fan because it would wash off his
Orange town, wouldn't it, And enough to have his carcass
rec reassaulted.

Speaker 1 (14:39):
But then if he gets an orange one, it would
add a layer of fude, would Yeah?

Speaker 2 (14:45):
I mean, I think you know it's it's you get
your digs in where you can.

Speaker 1 (14:49):
At the moment, perhaps.

Speaker 2 (14:52):
Sending a couple of thousand shaped like massive cocks around
to the White House might upset him a little bit.

Speaker 1 (14:59):
More flaming with his face on, flaming dog poop.

Speaker 2 (15:04):
Flaming dog poop. It's my drag name, Okay, Okay, I'm
not I mean, there's nothing to do with the name
of the bath bomb. Bath bombs, I I've found them problematic.

Speaker 1 (15:21):
You're supposed to wait till the dissolved before you I
know that, So what is it?

Speaker 2 (15:26):
God?

Speaker 1 (15:26):
I don't know, but I'm really gassy.

Speaker 2 (15:29):
I enjoy a bath bomb that does not have any
ship that floats around in it? Right?

Speaker 1 (15:35):
Some of the ones like the charms, yeah, and as.

Speaker 2 (15:38):
Like dried lavender. I don't want to be picking that
out of my crevice three days after I've had a
bath anyway, that's just me.

Speaker 1 (15:46):
How do you feel about ones with glittering?

Speaker 2 (15:48):
Mm? Hm never. You can't sorry, you can't get it
off the bath. Oh they've not thought the time and
a place for glittering. It's not in the bath.

Speaker 1 (16:02):
Everywhere else, everywhere else in this house. Moving on, How
do you feel about mice?

Speaker 2 (16:14):
Would mice, blind mice, little chopplin mice? I don't know.
I don't I don't feel I.

Speaker 1 (16:29):
Don't feel anything.

Speaker 2 (16:30):
I don't you know.

Speaker 1 (16:31):
If you explained to double before you're dead inside, you
feel nothing.

Speaker 2 (16:35):
I do not enjoy a wild in my house, but
in nature that's acceptable.

Speaker 1 (16:48):
Acceptable, Okay, So scientists have been playing with mice, Oh,
sexy time tweets.

Speaker 2 (16:55):
Tiny mice cock.

Speaker 1 (16:56):
Yes, no, they have created a wooly mouse.

Speaker 2 (17:03):
Is not just a hamster with the tail stock.

Speaker 1 (17:07):
But they're trying to bring back a warly mammoth and
starting with mice.

Speaker 2 (17:12):
And then when are they going to add the trunk
and it's.

Speaker 1 (17:16):
Big switching around, it's already got the tail. So yes,
colossal biosciences, I've around and created a genetically engineered mouse
to exhibit traits reminiscent of the extinct wooly mammoth, but
mouse size, mouse sized because it's harder to deal with
a woman wally mammoth.

Speaker 2 (17:35):
She've got like an aggressive fairy mouse. They aggressive, Well,
what you mentioned warding mammoths were quite aggressive because they
were very large and it was very cold.

Speaker 1 (17:46):
Agree, because I'm cold, Okay, we shouldn't be messing. So
they've called them colossal wooly mice.

Speaker 2 (17:56):
We shouldn't be messing with nature. Why not? Because it's
not it's not needed, it's not intended, it's not wanted.
Unless now I would be into this, a mouth sized
woly mammoth, like a little one, okay, that you could
like keep in a in a in like a hamstercade
that but as a wooly mammoth, generally big things made smaller.

(18:20):
I'm into that.

Speaker 1 (18:21):
You don't like big things, so you have a problem
with big statues.

Speaker 2 (18:24):
Yeah, but I didn't want one of those. I'd like it.
I'd like it. I'd like a wooer. I don't know.

Speaker 1 (18:31):
Okay, So what they're basically saying is they could have
broader applications, so they could end up bringing back other
species or preserving ones. We couldn't have that in.

Speaker 2 (18:41):
Dangerous well, and that's all right. Preserve the ones that
are about to disappear, don't bring back ones that have
gone forever, because it's it's just Jurassic Park all over
again in it like a Dodo. But they were useless.

Speaker 1 (18:53):
Why were they useless?

Speaker 2 (18:54):
They just didn't do anything until cheepy birds that were like,
oh I'm not this thing before, just walk up to
it shout through the head, Oh you're all dead. Bye. Wow.
I didn't know that was going to get so around.
So many feelings. Unicorns, what about you?

Speaker 1 (19:15):
We can't bring those back? No extinct, we can, they're
not extinct. You can't bring back up the nextinct.

Speaker 2 (19:22):
But no, I don't know.

Speaker 1 (19:25):
And if you want to bring back a mythological creature
just because you can? Why don't share that with us?
We are at the Cood TV on social media, and
that brings us nicely to our story of the week. Now,
are you aware of everything your body can do?

Speaker 2 (19:38):
I'm aware of what it can do. I'm also very
aware of what it can't do. Stand up with that
barely can can sit and keep up right and say words.
That's this show clearly demonstrates.

Speaker 1 (19:55):
So this is a story about they've done some science,
right I we love it when people do science, do
you yes, because they've come up with an explanation that
your asshole used to eject seamen.

Speaker 2 (20:08):
I don't like the way this is going. What I don't?
I don't. I don't want to think about assholes and
why not?

Speaker 1 (20:21):
I'm love?

Speaker 2 (20:26):
Why did they? No? No? Love? I don't like it?
You know how? No? Do you know what is that?
What it's called? Do you know how? I don't like
I don't like it when in a porn they spait
in each other's mouth and I don't understand why they
do that. I also don't like it when they like, go,
let's look at the load, and then they go right
to the bomb hole and then it all dribbles out.
I don't know why I don't.

Speaker 1 (20:47):
I just don't like it when they go, oh, let
me taste it.

Speaker 2 (20:49):
Oh, I don't like that either.

Speaker 1 (20:53):
Really, for that reraction, I would never have I would
have thought you loved it for that rection.

Speaker 2 (20:57):
So why did why it?

Speaker 1 (21:00):
Recent research suggest that the anus may have evolved from
a reproductive opening used for sperm to release in ancient animals,
which of course is how evolution works. So they focuses
on simple marine organisms, like small marine organisms with a
very weird name, which possesses a gonapoule, a single opening
for releasing sperm. It's like a chicken. What chicken? It's

(21:23):
bomb is Also it's for JJ, don't do that. That's
where the eggs popat egg comes out the same place.

Speaker 2 (21:33):
So do man chicken not have penises? They're called cockrels.

Speaker 1 (21:40):
I very rarely lay eggs.

Speaker 2 (21:43):
No, but do they? But do they not have to
have a penis to make the eggs in the in
the hollow? I need a I need a nature documentary
on BBC Three chickens right, So basically what sounded to
saying is that a bajillion years ago, all animals had

(22:07):
like a spunky bomb.

Speaker 1 (22:09):
Yes, yes, they'll have the spunky bomb, right, So the
evolution of a separate anus was allowed for more efficient
digestion for large larger body sizes. Okay, what about the
word it's it's just a very I feel like I'm
in like a weird fever.

Speaker 2 (22:27):
Dream like spunky anuses and.

Speaker 1 (22:34):
But that is all in the buzz this week.

Speaker 2 (22:36):
Wow, I'm so glad. I feel feel traumatized.

Speaker 1 (22:40):
You feel traumatized, I think I feel sitting next to you.

Speaker 2 (22:44):
But I've only got one bomb hole and it works
very well, thank you very much. Too well apparently.

Speaker 1 (22:51):
But yeah, don't go anywhere because we have a game
to play in our Game of the week.

Speaker 2 (23:04):
Welcome back to doing the cord with me Lee Robertson
and Mike Benny in Row and now it's part of
the show where we play a game. And this is
for the person who has a slightly angry with It's Mike.

Speaker 1 (23:16):
They love eggs, they don't smell.

Speaker 2 (23:18):
It's like my fried bag fried bacon ride, bacon and
eggs together like a cress. Stinky day of the week.
So this week we are playing the game where Mike
is going to give me an impression of a celebrity

(23:39):
doing something. I have got a guess what celebrity is
and what they're doing. Are you ready, Mike?

Speaker 1 (23:45):
I am indeed? Are we ready? Arm?

Speaker 2 (23:49):
Okay?

Speaker 1 (23:50):
So this one is saying I can't do that this
person's voice, So I'm not going to I'm just going
to do this.

Speaker 2 (24:05):
So you're not gonna do the person's voice because you
can't do it. So you're just gonna do that.

Speaker 1 (24:10):
And I'm hula hooping because that's what was the other
thing that you did. I did a Nazi salute.

Speaker 2 (24:15):
Okay, So I'm gonna go elong Moose, yes, just being
a bell end.

Speaker 1 (24:27):
Hula hooping.

Speaker 2 (24:28):
What was he doing?

Speaker 1 (24:29):
Hula hooping?

Speaker 2 (24:30):
Hula hooping? Mm hmmm. It's nice for him, isn't it.
I don't even know what he sounds like.

Speaker 1 (24:36):
I Betty says, Hollo, he's got it's got.

Speaker 2 (24:43):
Voices, patronizing voice.

Speaker 1 (24:46):
Shop can die. Okay, everybody, here's the traitor. You're the
traitor already, okay, d I see kay, what do we
want to do?

Speaker 2 (24:59):
H I'm gonna go with Claudia Winkleman, Yes on the horn,
not quite because she wants some dick. Claudia Winkleman cheerleading, Yes, chilling,
mm hmmm.

Speaker 1 (25:20):
See I'm good at this.

Speaker 2 (25:22):
Yeah, okay, I'm gonna do a voice. Do a voice, Mike.
It's the name of the game.

Speaker 1 (25:32):
Okay, already. Mm hmmm, I want to i'mdoing the toilet
a big pool. I'm wow.

Speaker 2 (25:46):
I don't know if that's acceptable nowadays to do that
kind of voice. Why not? It was German? Oh it
was German? Was it?

Speaker 1 (25:55):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (25:57):
Flat for German? Just to it again, just so well,
appreciate nuances, newances, big guy. I'm not doing the toilet.

Speaker 1 (26:10):
I'm not doing the po.

Speaker 2 (26:17):
Now. This isn't anything to do with what you sounded like, okay,
because you sounded like fuzzy bear? Is it Arnold Schwarzenegger
blocking the toilet up with a big curd? Is it?

Speaker 1 (26:29):
Oh my god, I'm gifted.

Speaker 2 (26:36):
I hate being so in sync with you.

Speaker 1 (26:43):
All right, all right, loves, Get a fly, Get a fly,
kill it, kill it, get a fly.

Speaker 2 (26:52):
I think I know what it is, and I'm horrified
that I know what it is from that hideous, hideous impression.
Uh huh?

Speaker 1 (27:01):
Is it?

Speaker 3 (27:02):
Is it?

Speaker 2 (27:02):
Alan Carr trying to swat a fly? Oh? Good, gree
So either I'm very talented. Yeah, you're either very talented
or you need to take a drinks. All right, Yeah,
I've got a brain tumor.

Speaker 1 (27:21):
Okay, you reck for this one, get worsely. I apologize,
and at the same time, holo, I've got a shobbery drinks.
I'm a Russian rubbery. Captain, were a lot of drinks?

Speaker 2 (27:45):
Is it a gay Sean comery? What's he doing? What
were you doing carrying a lot of drinks? I didn't
hear the drink or.

Speaker 1 (28:01):
Mm hmm okay, the next one.

Speaker 4 (28:05):
Then, happy birthday, mister presidents, Happy birthday.

Speaker 2 (28:19):
Don't stop, mister president. Got to hate.

Speaker 1 (28:25):
Do do do? Come on, and mister president, I hate.

Speaker 2 (28:36):
People out there. If you want to have any contraception,
just get in touch and we'll send you that clip
about face. Ain't nobody gonna want to do anything.

Speaker 1 (28:43):
I've got a headache. Tonight, no cool on love click.

Speaker 2 (28:47):
Mister Oh is it Marilyn Monroe singing conga Oh good green?

(29:14):
Oh I need it, I needed I need ament to this.

Speaker 1 (29:19):
Yeah, okay, okay, that's next one. You're not getting betterly,
I'm sorry near far one hundred.

Speaker 2 (29:31):
And h I'm afraid to press this, but I don't
want to say what it is right now? That's what?

Speaker 1 (29:48):
Is it?

Speaker 2 (29:48):
Still a black playing dark? It was giving? Why why
was she going? Why was she? Why did you still
a black spot? Where have you shot?

Speaker 1 (30:14):
Okay, next one, this one you'll get and it won't
be as disturbing.

Speaker 2 (30:19):
Okay, I don't, I don't, I don't.

Speaker 1 (30:30):
Who laughs like that doesn't have any expression in their face.
They just open mouth and scream, laugh and tap the
desk and they're sneezy.

Speaker 2 (30:41):
Is it RuPaul with a cold?

Speaker 1 (30:43):
Yes?

Speaker 2 (30:47):
Yeah, I get that.

Speaker 1 (30:48):
Yeah, okay, okay and talentless of everything that I do
and should be banned from t V. Oh it's James Gordon.

Speaker 2 (31:03):
I think they might many around.

Speaker 1 (31:05):
Hello, darlings, it's me. I'm fabulous. I'm playing Younger and
it's gold plated Jenger and it's amazing and I love
my husband very much. Without anything that's a twink, I
have no eye?

Speaker 3 (31:20):
Is it me?

Speaker 1 (31:21):
No anything as long as a twink?

Speaker 2 (31:26):
Anything, because it's it's gold jnger. Is it Elton John
playing jer Wow? What he usually goes about? Were into
next week? Okay?

Speaker 1 (31:43):
A lot doing this? I do it very well, do it?
And then I like that in the end when you
go like that and then like that, you then do
like that and like that with about of Chocolate's Jenny, I.

Speaker 2 (31:59):
Don't want to play this guy anymore? Why not? I
want to play this game ever again? You got it.
It's somebody doing the macarena that likes a box of
chocolates and Jenny oh a running It's Forrest gumb It
is doing the macarena. Dorri Scomb, mom bag altar, Dori Scomb.

(32:27):
Can you can you do Yoda singing Happy birthday? Macarena?

Speaker 1 (32:34):
Yoda doing happy birthday, mister president. Yeah, birthday happiness. It
is no do.

Speaker 2 (32:48):
Anyway.

Speaker 1 (32:49):
That's enough.

Speaker 2 (32:50):
Coming up after this shot break, we're going to get
scientific in that science that is welcome back. You are
still watching Mike and Lee on chewing the cord. Now
we learned something interesting in that science. That is.

Speaker 1 (33:20):
That science. That is so I have been inspired by
your story about Ricky Martin, have you yes? So We're
going to make feet knowing not We're going to make pea,
oh drinkable pea.

Speaker 2 (33:34):
Oh my, what I mean? First it was the Jays,
then it was Pooh.

Speaker 1 (33:40):
It was poof first we made Pooh, then we made
did you did we make poo? First?

Speaker 2 (33:44):
We made poof first, milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner chocolates.
It's all the same. It's really not ly.

Speaker 1 (33:55):
I mean back to my story about USO having spur
the arses at one point. Yes, so we're gonna make
pee nice. Okay. So you have your receptacle glass, which
we're gonna call your bladder okay, okay, And then we've
got a combination of fluids and solids and things. Yes,
yes we do.

Speaker 2 (34:15):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (34:16):
So the first thing I want you to do is
you have a white powdery stuff here, Okay, not the stuff,
not the sparkle stuff. Then not the sparkle stuff character
meth So this is urea and urreic acid, okay, which
is the thing that makes peep, really makes pepe. So
pop that into your bladder glass, okay, okay, yeah, yeah, okay.

(34:44):
It took a lot long time for me to get
that from my pea to be dried out like that.
And then also what else is in that? You've got
sugars and salts and things. M Depending on your diet,
depends on the amount. So if you have a lot
of sweet things, you have a lot more sugar in
and diabetes.

Speaker 2 (35:04):
If you if your weels like sugar puffs, does that
mean that you've got diabetes?

Speaker 1 (35:08):
I means you're probably eaten sugar puffs, although they're not
sugar puffs anymore. They're called honey puffs, okay, because they
don't want to be associated with delicious sugar. So here
you have a combination of sugar and salt. So you
don't want all of this. You just want to pinch really,
just a little pinch, A little pinchy pinch, just a
little pinch, my pop to it because okay, and now

(35:30):
now you have some vitamins and minerally things. So the
black thing is it contains amino acids.

Speaker 2 (35:39):
Sorry, windy pops.

Speaker 1 (35:41):
Okay, So you have to get the amino acids out
of the little thing. You don't want to put the
whole How do I do that? So you need to
pierce it, pierce it. So I've given you a knife.

Speaker 2 (35:54):
They've given me a butter knife.

Speaker 1 (35:56):
I've given you a knife.

Speaker 2 (35:58):
So and just done. I'll just remove my brooches because
some very very very fashionable person and I'll do it
like that.

Speaker 1 (36:10):
Yeah, okay, we'll cut my open put.

Speaker 2 (36:13):
A little hole in the end. Hole went through the
side of good.

Speaker 1 (36:26):
So lady like, yeah, we won't having problems.

Speaker 2 (36:30):
Do I squeeze the juice?

Speaker 1 (36:32):
Sueeze the juice, which is amino acid into the.

Speaker 2 (36:34):
Oh did you say? Oh look at that?

Speaker 1 (36:37):
Oh I look, there's a reaction already happening. It's gone
piss yellow, piss yellow, because we're making piss.

Speaker 2 (36:47):
My fingers have done yellow. Oh dear, do you want
to borrow my pen?

Speaker 1 (36:56):
I was back into it right?

Speaker 2 (36:57):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (36:58):
Oh, there we go when the full lovely, marvelous And
then the last thing that we have here. We've done
amino acids, We've done your ear, We've done the salts.
And these are these are solid electrolytes.

Speaker 2 (37:13):
Oh. I don't like the taste of that orange stuff.
Oh it's beefy? Is it beef?

Speaker 1 (37:23):
I thought for years, for years we got away from
beef flavoring and beef smells. Is it beef? Is it?

Speaker 2 (37:31):
Though?

Speaker 1 (37:31):
It's not beef? No, No, it's amino acids.

Speaker 2 (37:35):
So you've got a tablet.

Speaker 1 (37:35):
I need you to crush up.

Speaker 2 (37:37):
Oh, okay, okay.

Speaker 1 (37:38):
There's a couple of ways of crushing up. We can
either use a knife for spood or after you've licked ites.

Speaker 2 (37:45):
Oh, I just did it all at once. Then god,
I'm so, I'm so masculine.

Speaker 1 (37:52):
You're like toats.

Speaker 2 (37:53):
But baby, so i've crushed it.

Speaker 1 (37:56):
I can't and then pop it in your bloody glass.

Speaker 2 (38:01):
It's kind of picking up.

Speaker 1 (38:03):
Okay, yo, right, wonderful. And then we just need to
Now most of pea is just water, okay, so I
want you to add the water to the big glass. Okay,
I've got my algo. First, it's warm, because pea is warm,
isn't it.

Speaker 2 (38:19):
I prefer to drink my pea cold where you could
leave it to go cold. Then just pour it all
in at the same time.

Speaker 1 (38:27):
In Okay, I do need to give it a stir
as well.

Speaker 2 (38:39):
Stirring up the piss, stearing up the piss.

Speaker 1 (38:45):
Good nose to gallery loving this. Why are you laughing?

Speaker 2 (38:49):
I'm just laughing.

Speaker 1 (38:51):
Okay, so I mixed up.

Speaker 2 (38:55):
Now I've got blobs floating in my pace. Nor have
you got blobbed in your pass?

Speaker 1 (39:03):
You mean you don't normally have?

Speaker 2 (39:06):
Its gonna have to bleep out pass. Got a nice pace,
it's gonna be buying.

Speaker 1 (39:25):
And so there we've made pee. We haven't we've simulated pea.

Speaker 2 (39:30):
Well, why is all that orange shape dissolved?

Speaker 1 (39:33):
Because the water wasn't hot enough? Did you talk that
long to.

Speaker 2 (39:40):
My pass? Isn't like that?

Speaker 1 (39:42):
No, you don't drink enough water.

Speaker 2 (39:43):
That's why gallery is asking us to drink. And I'm
not going to drink pass without paying for it being paid.
Always drinking his pass, he's drinking his pace, always drinking
his peace. Okay, Wow, I'm not going to drink it.

(40:05):
You're not.

Speaker 1 (40:05):
Why not?

Speaker 2 (40:06):
Because I'm a lady. Just have a taste. I don't
want to drink the piss.

Speaker 1 (40:13):
Drink drink.

Speaker 2 (40:17):
I don't want I don't want to drink the piss.

Speaker 1 (40:25):
Just drink the piss.

Speaker 2 (40:26):
I don't want to drink the pear because I don't
like the pear. How do you know if you've not
drank it. I am the piss giver, not the best.

Speaker 1 (40:34):
Take you plenty take the piss.

Speaker 2 (40:39):
No, it smells.

Speaker 1 (40:40):
It smells a what.

Speaker 2 (40:42):
Piss. Okay, that's science.

Speaker 1 (40:52):
That is quite, that's science.

Speaker 2 (41:02):
That is so some celebrities they enjoy a drink of
whey the first way of the day because they say
it's full of nutrients. But it can't be full of
it because it's it's a waste product. Well, it's a
waste product.

Speaker 1 (41:14):
But also the thing about like multi vitamins and stuff,
when you've got like a thousand perdis you absorb so
little of that that you're just basically making expensive we.

Speaker 2 (41:25):
Right, So they are right.

Speaker 1 (41:27):
You do pee out a lot of what you take
in vitamins and mineral wise to absorb. But if it's
you're trying to get rid of it, I wouldn't drink
my own. It's sterile.

Speaker 2 (41:37):
Did you drink somebody else's tends?

Speaker 1 (41:39):
How much you pain? Because you know if you're gonna
offer medley.

Speaker 2 (41:44):
Well, I'm not going to offer you in my pets, no,
because it's yours.

Speaker 1 (41:49):
Orange. It also comes out in tablet for me that
that diydrated.

Speaker 2 (41:56):
Mine comes out in like like one of those I
want to say nutrogena, but it's not new to Gina.
The fizzy tablets fizzy Brocca. Yeah, really hurts, but it
was worth it. Genus. What was the other word, barocca? Barocca.

Speaker 1 (42:17):
One's a vitamin tablet, the other one's skin carry.

Speaker 2 (42:22):
Do you know?

Speaker 1 (42:24):
I don't, but I'm sure you're about to tell me.

Speaker 2 (42:26):
Piss poor originated from the olden days when you could
sell your Wii two two me and I would bath
in it. No, you would sell it to the leather

(42:49):
tanner ah who would dip the leather in the Wii
because it can take it contains things, I mean acids
that make the leather. But then this makes like piss,
so people would what past and they go with piss
pants but really because they were just wearing a pissy belt.

(43:10):
Oh god.

Speaker 1 (43:13):
That's almost the end of the show for now. But
on screen now you can see our contact details. It's
at the cood TV on social media and if you
want to catch up with breath this episodes always binge us.
Just have a look for YouTube Chewing the Cud.

Speaker 2 (43:29):
Thank you for watching and we will see you all
again next week.

Speaker 1 (43:32):
Bye bye