Ep. 456 "Do You Want a Title or Nah? Let’s Talk Marriage Insurance & Men Who Can’t Lead"

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Yeah, you're a check one two, check one two?

Speaker 2 (00:04):
Is this Mike On? Is this Mike On?

Speaker 3 (00:06):
Hey?

Speaker 1 (00:06):
Listen man, it's the one and only Trenks that a dj.

Speaker 2 (00:09):
Sis and you're listening to cocktails dirty discussions with Kikia
Medina Monroe.

Speaker 1 (00:14):
Here. Today's cocktail is called late checkout. I love a
late checkout. The ingredients you need, Sir Davis whiskey, two
ounces of it, a half ounce of lime juice, a
half ounce of a gave neck or spicy a gave
if you want to look kick in it, two dashes

(00:36):
of angos or bitters, and you're gonna top it off
with some ginger beer or sprite whatever that's writ in a.

Speaker 2 (00:40):
Minute every now and I need an emergency sprite.

Speaker 1 (00:44):
Every now and again. And you're gonna garnish this with
a lime wheel or a candy ginger. I love a
good old ginger chew. This is how you're gonna make it.
You're gonna add your whiskey, your lime juice, you're a
gave and your bitterer's to a shaker with ice. Shake
it like you need a late checkout extension? Can I
go till two not eleven? I need the two PM checkout,
or four strain into a rocks or a highball glass

(01:05):
with fresh ice, and then top it with that ginger
beer for the spicy grown vibe or the sprite for
sweet and flirty, which one are you? And garnish it
with the lime wheel and there you have it, guys,
a late check out.

Speaker 2 (01:19):
I am a spicy old lady and I cannot wait
until I hopefully I make it toll like eighty something,
because I think that's when I will reach my final form.
A lot of the things that I aspire to do
in my life, just like on a personal level or
old lady activities. I want to sit on my porch
every day in a rocking chair or even a glider.

(01:40):
If I'm filling new age with some spiked lemonador sweet
tea with liquor. Oh, I don't know what kind of look.

Speaker 1 (01:50):
I tell you can't drink anymore?

Speaker 2 (01:52):
Who won't check me? That's the other parts that I'm
looking forward to. When you're old, you.

Speaker 1 (01:58):
Do what you want to do unless somebody steps in.
It's like take the drink from her.

Speaker 2 (02:04):
And you can take it, and I'm gonna bop you
with my cane one time, y'all, Uh, my grandma got
pulled over. Right, She wasn't drinking or anything. Does she
drink though, but she doesn't drink a lot now. She
used to. She also got epilepsy. I don't think she looky.
I don't think's supposed to drink at all. So every
now and again she will have like a little few

(02:25):
SIPs of moscato, like on her birthday, Christmas, Thanksgiving. That's it.
And then that thing start beeping on her phone. Glue
close too high, you know how the diabetes skull, she's
got the sugar at this point. Anyways, she gets pulled over.
She was going somewhere back in that fish This guy
pulls her over. The cop. She's looking at him. I
guess she was like, I don't know what she was doing.

(02:47):
Something wasn't right. He takes her license stuff. She's looking
at him. She's like, wait a minute, are you such
and such. My grandma was a band director for many
years out there, so she's been working in the schools
for a long time. This is a former shuite enough,
hers all grown up and this is like in the
past ten or fifteen years. Anyway, he was like, well,
I pulled you over because you were swerving or something

(03:08):
like that. He said. He was like, I didn't know
if you were a drunk driver or not. Get me
back my license. I'm not drunk. I'm going to wherever
she was going give it back. Now. You know what
he did. He gave her that license back and he
told her to have a good day, and she went on,
those are the things that I want to do when
I'm old.

Speaker 1 (03:27):
I got a ticket the other day.

Speaker 2 (03:28):
You didn't even drive fast. I don't. I didn't.

Speaker 1 (03:33):
I just I picked up my phone. I was on
a zoom call.

Speaker 2 (03:36):
Oh hell no, I was.

Speaker 1 (03:38):
I have a deal right now. It's an international deal.
I'm a real estate agent, right. I was like, So,
I was on the phone with the other agent that's
in uh, Dominican Republic, and we're I just picked up
the phone to move it and.

Speaker 2 (03:51):
And I would.

Speaker 1 (03:52):
We weren't even like really driving. It was the you
know how gets clogged up right when you're leaving Linux.
It wasn't even like real driving.

Speaker 2 (03:59):
And I'm like, what is he pulling me over for?

Speaker 1 (04:00):
I didn't even do anything.

Speaker 2 (04:01):
I was like, oh my.

Speaker 1 (04:02):
God, like it's my life. I just didn't know what
was going on.

Speaker 2 (04:04):
It's my tag bag. What's going on?

Speaker 1 (04:06):
So I pulled, I pull over and I'm just are
you just already be annoyed with the police? And then
he he comes up and he's like he was Jamaican
and he was like, do you know what you did?

Speaker 2 (04:15):
And I was like, I don't know.

Speaker 1 (04:17):
I'm on the phone, Like I hate when they asked
that you must get to it.

Speaker 2 (04:22):
Yeah, I was like what did I do?

Speaker 1 (04:23):
And I was just so annoyed. He was like, I
need to see your license. I was like, well, sir,
it's in the trunk. My purse is in the trunk
and my license is in my purse. And he was like,
do you have any weapons? And I was like, do
I look like I have any where?

Speaker 2 (04:35):
You was going to gun class. Maybe you saw the episode.

Speaker 1 (04:37):
This was before that. This was several weeks ago, like
maybe even months at this point. Anyways, he was like,
he really gave me a ticket.

Speaker 2 (04:45):
I thought he was.

Speaker 1 (04:46):
I thought I was gonna be when I got off
the car like Booty and he gonna not give me
a ticket.

Speaker 2 (04:49):
Gave me a ticket.

Speaker 1 (04:50):
You know what?

Speaker 2 (04:51):
I did? What?

Speaker 1 (04:52):
Call Lieutenant Bay, call that nigga, tell him take this off?

Speaker 3 (04:55):
What?

Speaker 2 (04:56):
And he did do yeah, I don't know pace to
know people. It does because I was like, sir, I've
gotten pulled over for a phone thing. I did have
the phone in my hand. I need to see something.
Y'all got a whole fucking laptop, and I don't even
think y'all be working. Sometimes I wish the tent was

(05:16):
not as dark so I could see, because I got
a feeling some of y'all's on their playing games. You're
playing Grand Theft, Auto, the two K, the sports absolutely,
and where y'all getting that at? By the way, my
favorite site. You know, we can't see that here in
this damn state. They blocked up. Well, obviously I'm the

(05:38):
only masturbating bitch in the room. Well it's been blocked
for where you go. I knew you was gonna say that.
I hate that ghetto ass website, but I've been on it.
It's on my private browser. I have to be very careful.
The aesthetic. Well it looks like two thousand and two.

Speaker 1 (06:00):
Well, you gotta look. It has to be white people born.
I watched white people born.

Speaker 2 (06:04):
I didn't know that, and I forgot. I realized, actually
I am really good and not only blacking out when
I get drunk, but like blacking out memories like that.
I should remember, you don't.

Speaker 1 (06:17):
Watch white people born.

Speaker 2 (06:18):
I don't like it every now and then again, I
will every now and again. It's too pink. I don't
want to see pink pussies, pink nipples and pink dicks.
I don't like it. It starts making me think about abuse,
rashes and getting your ass beat and sunburn, all very

(06:39):
uncomfortable things. Yeah, I don't, especially the men.

Speaker 1 (06:46):
I don't. I only watch lesbian born.

Speaker 2 (06:49):
And I need to see a dick in there, and
not a fake one, not nothing you bought down at
the dr office building that is also a plastic surgery center.
I don't want to see no manufactured parts, not on
the men and the woman. Okay, yeah, anyway, I don't

(07:09):
know where I was going with that, but yeah, I
don't like the pink porn. But more power to you
if you're making that. I hope also that if you
guys are out here making stuff that your only source
of income wouldn't fucking porn hub, because what the fuck
are they doing? I was so confused because I wasn't
reading all that. When you go to porn hub right
now on your phone, it's gonna have a message from

(07:30):
a lady. She's sitting there, real serious, and I'm just like, okay, No,
it's like she's at work at a desk. I don't
know if it's ar or what. She got a blond
wig on. It's less stiff than mine. And what I'm
saying wei is probably not anyway. She looks like that
lady that was at the Coldplay concert with her boss.

Speaker 1 (07:51):
Think about that. I think about that. And did you
read the statement from the wife. That's not real, that's
not real. You've seen the typos. Yeah, well let me say,
let me not say it's not real. It's unconfirmed. I
kept seeing it circulated. I did read it, and I
loved it, but it I was like, it's sepposing. I
don't think she did this anyways. That in the picture
within babies, that's not her. It's another lady I found

(08:11):
her on Facebook. LinkedIn was in shambles. I don't really
care for LinkedIn too much like it to me. I
try to use it very professionally. I am a professional
on there. Whatever professional shit I'm talking about engaging with
it turned messy. People started commenting on their pages.

Speaker 2 (08:33):
They were commenting and stuff. Early in the morning time
I wake up, me and Whitley on a walk. This
is what I see all down my timeline. I was like,
oh my god, I'm so glad I got up early.
I can go to LinkedIn and see for myself. I
saw it, so I know it was happening. People were
leaving comments like they wanted a job, because obviously these
people about to be out of them right. People were

(08:54):
commenting like, I'm a crisis manager if you need help,
bah blah. Somebody had the same name as the man,
and I can't remember what he did professionally, but like
everybody was coming to his LinkedIn, so of course he
was smart enough to know. Let me let y'all know
what I do do though, just in case you want XYZ. Yeah.

(09:15):
And it was something something I can't remember what it was.
Didn't apply to me anyway. I thought it was wild.
Then I try to put myself in their spouse issues.
I would be so embarrassed. I want that letter to
be real, the statement from the wife, but either way
it goes. I just wonder, and I've wondered this often
with people who be out and they're with someone who

(09:38):
is married or they are married and they're out with
someone very publicly, I'd be wondering, like, what do you
do for a living? What do you have for yourself?
What would happen if your world came tumbling down because
somebody found out about this affair? Or is it okay?
Because I also have to remind myself everybody is not
going to take issue with this, like some people do

(09:59):
have open relationships, open marriages and they're not public about
it because they did it. But I'm just saying, like
I'll be thinking about all that. When I saw this,
I was just like, this is what are the odds?

Speaker 1 (10:11):
Like my mind, I made it a whole Olivia Pope moment,
like I was like.

Speaker 2 (10:14):
What would you do if you were Olivia Pope?

Speaker 1 (10:16):
Well wait, I'm not Olivia. I just made it like
a show. I was like, did the what if the
wife curated all that? Because it was just like what
are the odds at a concert? I mean because then
it also I saw something where it was like the
wife did know somebody in a part of the Coldplay team,
and so then I'm.

Speaker 2 (10:32):
Like, sounds like a scheme that the wife set up
and I'm not at.

Speaker 1 (10:37):
It like she had been saying, I don't know, you
cheating on me, and he was like.

Speaker 2 (10:40):
Oh, I'm not, I'm not. I don't like to see
this kind of stuff. I do a lot for this family.
I'm working at an astronomy do for the family. Like,
still don't know what atmosphere, what are they even doing?
I don't.

Speaker 1 (10:57):
Cheating, Like I really want a cheating ass nigga A man,
not a woman. It's just different for some reason, because
why do y'all do this?

Speaker 2 (11:05):
It's like he has so many assuming he had a
lot to lose.

Speaker 1 (11:09):
Yeah, and you didn't want to just stay in the hotel.

Speaker 2 (11:14):
You did. This is the other thing, y'all. I'm not
saying it. I'm not to say it. Okay, I'm not
trying to offend people. But for real, a lot of y'all,
nobody would have known who you were. For real, if
y'all didn't act the way that you did once you
realized you were on the screen, all that ducking and dodging,
it would have been very easy to say that was

(11:35):
such and such. Y'all know what I'm saying. Rebetween the line.
It wouldn't have been all over the time. People are
on kiss camps every sporting event. The fact that y'all
did that, everybody was like, oh, Halla, Halla, halla, what's
going on? What's going on? I wasn't cute? What No?
I couldn't see because the light. But then I did. No,

(11:56):
we were good anyway. You see people on a kiss
cam and on the camera, but when you do all
that ducking and dodge and you running off is why?
And then the girl that works there that recently got
the promotion with the brown hair, that was sitting over
there cheesy now I would like to speak, Not really,
I don't think she's in trouble. But what I want
to know is did you get the promotion because they

(12:22):
offered it to you to keep the secret? Or were
you a part of the scheme?

Speaker 1 (12:26):
Are you in the threesome with them?

Speaker 2 (12:28):
Well? No, not that scheme, but that's another good I
didn't think about them. After I've it sounds like we
actually need to sit down, stop talking to y'all and
sit down and have a meeting and come up with
some scripts because I need I need everybody on the job.
I want Hulu to do a limited series. I would
like HBO, Max or Max whatever the fuck your name

(12:50):
is today, I want y'all to do a movie. I
want to be to do something to hold me over
and give somebody else a chance, and then who else
be doing the things? Flick? Netflix's gonna have the real documentary.
I want them to have the real documentary with the
swinging cameras while everybody's sitting there and half of your
faces dark. I want real documentary. Hulu gets the limited series,

(13:13):
HBO Max gets the movie to be Do what You Do.

Speaker 1 (13:18):
I want to know why in today's day and age,
why are you doing this? Like at the end of
the day, like and if you guys don't know, let
me let you know. You are being recorded. I mean,
that's just it. You're gonna be on camp if you're cheating,
if you're stealing, if you're mistreating somebody like you're you're
likely gonna get caught.

Speaker 2 (13:36):
And so it's just to me, it's just interesting.

Speaker 1 (13:38):
I was having a conversation with a friend I don't
even want to be his friend no more, because he
was stupid. Like, you know, I give you some like
their opinion, she's like, sorre, you're dumb. So we were
talking about cheating and marriages and he was like, well,
you know, women uh uh immediately shouldn't like. He was like,

(13:58):
it's too many women right now that are just like
divorcing their husbands. And I said, do you know why
do you follow that Asian lawyer? I forget her name,
but I follow her. My mom sent her to me, And.

Speaker 2 (14:07):
Is she just the airline hacks.

Speaker 1 (14:08):
No, No, she's an attorney. She's a divorce attorney. And
she's been talking about how there's an influx of older
women who.

Speaker 2 (14:14):
Send it to me I would love to get.

Speaker 1 (14:16):
Oh my gosh, she is really she's really breaking it down.
She's like, there's an influx of older women who are
leaving their husbands. Dude, and him and I were talking
about all this, the cheating, the stuff that men just
He's like, you're a man basher now, and I was like, no,
I'm not. I was like, I just am looking at
things for what they all.

Speaker 2 (14:31):
Get more realistic and just saying.

Speaker 1 (14:34):
Like, talk about it. Tell me why men cheat? Tell
me why you think that his wife shouldn't leave him
for that. He's like, because women shouldn't leave their husbands.

Speaker 3 (14:43):
Why.

Speaker 2 (14:43):
I said, well, what if he leave her to go
be with the hooch? You mind?

Speaker 1 (14:49):
Well, he was like well, men can do that because
we're going to actually have options out here. And I
was like, it's twenty twenty five and you're actually saying
this out loud. He was like yeah, he was like,
but just look at it. He was like, with a woman,
if you you leave the husband, he's the one who's
probably making the money and you now you want to
take all his stuff, you're gonna go live your life
by yourself and you don't have anything.

Speaker 2 (15:08):
But she have options so good.

Speaker 1 (15:10):
And you're not going to be able to get a man.
And he was like, so it just behooves women another
you to stay with their husband. He said, look at
Cardi B. She did all that and now the man
did what he did.

Speaker 2 (15:20):
And I was like, you, Cardi B is up and
is stuck. Like she said, she got more money than him.

Speaker 1 (15:28):
I just don't think it's all about the money. I'm like,
what about happy To his.

Speaker 2 (15:31):
Point like, she can't get another, she don't need one.

Speaker 1 (15:35):
She probably does want one, though, no, I.

Speaker 2 (15:37):
Said need like she she will be fine, she wants one,
I'm sure. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (15:42):
And so his argument was, yeah, y'all do want men,
and they're not gonna want you if you're at a
certain age and you leave your man. You need to
stay with your husband.

Speaker 2 (15:48):
I said, even through abuse.

Speaker 1 (15:50):
And he was like, he's like, well, what do you
consider abuse? And I was like, uh, are you There
are a lot of men then think like this.

Speaker 2 (16:01):
And it's like, y'all, what are we doing?

Speaker 1 (16:03):
I said, so, wait a minute, are you saying that
you don't believe that emotional abuse is abuse that matters?
And he was like talking about words. I was like,
are you like, y'all need to have some of these
conversations with the men in your lives. These are the conversations.
These are the conversation because you start to see you're like,

(16:24):
wait what. I was like, yeah, So if a woman
is in the house in a marriage and she lets
say she's been married thirty years and all the whole past,
the past uh seventeen years, he's been called her out
of her name. Maybe he doesn't hit entertain Let's say
seventeen women stick it out. I know a few of them.
He's talking crazy to her. He's they have kids. Your

(16:47):
kids are seeing this, like he is disrespectful, he doesn't help.
You're saying that the woman should stay so.

Speaker 2 (16:54):
Then because she can't get another one of this raggety
version of the human.

Speaker 1 (17:00):
So then I was like, you know what I think
it is. Hmm, I said, you know, I think that
there's a pain tolerance because I even look at myself
and some of the things that I've put up with.

Speaker 2 (17:08):
I think that.

Speaker 1 (17:09):
And I'm gonna say black women specifically. I don't think
that the white women have this, but I think that
black women have a certain pain tolerance and we don't
look at it like that. We stick things out. We
have a pain tolerance that gets passed down from mom,
from grandma, from everybody, and black men not everybody. But
I think this is the because too many people are
saying where it's like, bro, that's not okay.

Speaker 2 (17:31):
You see the you've seen.

Speaker 1 (17:33):
Your mom work really hard or your grandma work really
hard and deal with what she dealt with and stick
it out, and so now you just look at everybody
else like, yeah, you're good. No, you're not good. You
don't need to have this much pain ton you need
to leave if it is that. If it's bad, emotional abuse,
especially physical abuse, financial abuse, there's so many different levels
of abuse that men think is silly. They're just like,

(17:55):
that's not y'all just making it up.

Speaker 2 (17:57):
Now what and I'd be willing to get it cash
and don't even matter. Now why do you uh, I
don't need anything? Coming back to hunt me? Why do
you say you don't think white women deal with this?
What do you think is different?

Speaker 1 (18:11):
And none of this is factual? But I think I
just thought.

Speaker 4 (18:14):
I thought.

Speaker 1 (18:15):
I think that I don't really think in white ladies.
If anybody's listening, please correct me if I'm wrong. I
don't really think that they grow up seeing like what
we see our moms do.

Speaker 2 (18:27):
Like just like the dysfunction.

Speaker 1 (18:28):
No, no, no, not dysfunction, just like a lot of
hard work, like just you're doing a lot. You're doing
like seven things and taking care of kids and cooking
and working, and just like you just carry it all
and you are tired. I feel like white women can
say they're tired and they can go to sleep. And
if we are like I'm tired and I want to
go to sleep, everybody's like get up. It's like seeing

(18:49):
when your parents see you taking a nap and they
just mad, why can't I just lay down?

Speaker 2 (18:53):
Why is it?

Speaker 1 (18:54):
And this is coming a lot from like seeing things
on social media different arguments and different things pop up
in my timeline where it's like the men be getting
so mad when they hear black women talk about wanting
a soft life, and you assume that that she's saying
she doesn't want to work, when that's not what that means.
They just want to feel soft every once in a while.
And I don't really see that in the white world.
I'm not saying it doesn't happen, but it showed me.

(19:16):
I guess, well, I don't go and a lot of
the people that I know who are white, it's like,
oh no, my mom didn't work. She was a mom.
It's like, oh no, my mom was a mom and
she worked more than one job, and she was a
great wife and she could you know what I mean.
It's like and we all saw that and we kind
of are like, that's just what you do. You can

(19:37):
do it. But now we're kind of like, well, why
aren't it I'm tired. I ain't even know it all
of it.

Speaker 2 (19:44):
Yeah, it is frustrating because it feels like y'all really
want us to be not only working fucking mules, but
you want to be in charge. That going back to
something you said, you didn't say that, but that's what
I heard last episode. It boils my blood. It's making

(20:10):
my wigs slide off, and the clippings I added into it.

Speaker 1 (20:16):
The way to find balance and peace because I just
I do think that the argument if your girl is
like I just want softness.

Speaker 2 (20:26):
It's frustrating to me because it's like, how can you
say that you want to be in charge and you
want to lead, but I actually do more work. And
then it's like, oh, you think this is like a
regular job. Then it makes if there's not actually a
related it's like, Okay, the person at the top, they

(20:47):
make lots of decisions in a company. You make all
the decisions, You do all this stuff, but you don't
have to do like the grunt work, okay, answering the phone,
the report, you're analyzing the report. You don't have to
do the stuff. You have all these other people under you.
So then it starts to feel like you think you're that,
but it's like, how the fuck you think you're that?

(21:08):
I do. You could leave and it won't I might
be sad, maybe there's a little bit less money, but like,
shit will go on. You actually don't do that much,
so why the fuck do you think you get to
lead the situation as a man, you know. And it's
like if I have to work, if I'm taking care
of the kids, I'm doing their doctor's appointments, I'm staying

(21:29):
on top of all of these things to run the family.
And you go to your job whatever that is, or
run your business, and you bring home some money, but
I still got to put in money for everything else.
You are actually the weakest link. You need to rub
my feet.

Speaker 1 (21:46):
I just don't work where we meet in the middle.
Because again I'm gonna give you an example.

Speaker 2 (21:50):
I don't want to meet in the middle. I want
them to go away from me with the bullshit. But
what are you thinking? Confused?

Speaker 1 (21:59):
Because I don't what are we all doing. I have
another friend going through divorce and he was telling me how,
oh a man friend. This is a man friend. Okay,
the wife wants no, he's mad. I not only care
about their money, I mean that would. And I know
a lot of people right now going through divorces. The
women are sad and the men are only like, you
can't have anything, like they just all they care about

(22:20):
is the money.

Speaker 2 (22:21):
And so I saw they got to hang on to
not even their hairlines go ahead.

Speaker 1 (22:25):
I'm so I'm listening. He's having them. He's like, can
you just can I? Can I just tell you something?
He's telling me the things he's like, she's trying to
take some of my money that it's like it's not hers.
And I was like, I'm listening. I'm listening because now, y'all,
I don't know shit either. I don't know shit about nothing.
So I was like, okay. I was like, so she's
trying to take the money. Okay, how long were y
all married? A long time?

Speaker 2 (22:46):
Okay?

Speaker 1 (22:46):
I said, Okay, I said, well kids, kid, okay, I
said okay. So I said, no, let me just ask
you something just out of like, that's your money. Did
she work?

Speaker 2 (22:58):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (22:58):
But she didn't make a lot of man said okay, okay,
you're keeping the house.

Speaker 2 (23:02):
Okay, I said, So let me ask him. Do you
care about her?

Speaker 1 (23:05):
Like I know this is happening and this is probably
really rough for both of y'all. Yeah, what is the goal?
I said, because at the end of the day, I
was like, she took would you say she was a
good mom?

Speaker 2 (23:16):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (23:18):
Why don't you want to give her anything? Like are
you actually saying that? Like you don't think that she
deserves anything.

Speaker 2 (23:27):
What sense does that make?

Speaker 1 (23:28):
And he really was like, you're just taking a woman.

Speaker 2 (23:30):
No, I'm not. I'm really curious.

Speaker 1 (23:33):
I'm trying to understand. How do you make this make sense?
Y'all are leaving each other. Y'all have been together almost
your whole lives. She you're keeping everything, and she has
to go into the world. You start to think that
you owe her something. I think you do, don't You
don't even want to give her something?

Speaker 2 (23:51):
Is he taking this? I said, you don't want m
hm he is. That doesn't to me that Sue doesn't.
I was just wondering because I was gonna have something
else to say, But okay, I'll take that back.

Speaker 1 (24:01):
Okay, so he's taking the kids and so that's probably
be gone. I said, you don't just want to help
her like she? I said, let's just really.

Speaker 2 (24:08):
Think about it.

Speaker 1 (24:08):
You probably had times in your marriage where she was
probably doing a lot for you.

Speaker 2 (24:13):
Well, he say, it was just quiet. He had to
think about that. Yeah. I was like, I don't.

Speaker 1 (24:19):
I don't know what men be expecting you have, especially
if you have the money you have to give it.
I don't really know what to tell you.

Speaker 5 (24:26):
You're giving the money, and she probably deserves it, if
we're being honest and the whole the time, I always
go back when people don't want to listen to always
go back to, hey, listen, I don't know your situation,
but let's look at your mom.

Speaker 1 (24:38):
You think your mom deserved a little something more from
your dad? I bet we all would say yes. We
probably all would say.

Speaker 2 (24:44):
I don't know why.

Speaker 1 (24:45):
We can acknowledge the hard work that our mom does,
but men can acknowledge that your wife is doing the
same thing.

Speaker 2 (24:52):
I think they get stuck on that that loop of
thinking about, oh, I gotta have a legacy. Your legacy
is shit, bitch, That's what it is. When this is
the type of person that you would be because you
would create another life with another person, and then because
things work out now as long as she didn't do
nothing too crazy, like against you or your child or

(25:14):
something truly horrific, the relationship just didn't work out. Now
all of a sudden, this person, you shouldn't be.

Speaker 1 (25:21):
Here if you're okay, Like I will.

Speaker 2 (25:24):
Be honest, I would wonder you're taking the kid, what's
up with that? But if we've been married for a
really long time. What did you do throughout the were
you supportive of her doing something else to make more money?
Does she want to make more money? Did she have
career dreams and you made her put them on hold?
Or did she not have career dreams and she just
kept a job because you made her.

Speaker 1 (25:46):
That's on you, sir. I don't know what God has
in store for me. The girls are for you for everybody. Oh,
I don't think it really benefits. I think it benefits everybody.
Just hear me out, hear me. Now, this is what
I was like, Okay, well, should I be blessed to
meet the man that has the capacity to love me?
And we love each other and we want to do this,

(26:07):
and we choose to do this. No one's forcing the
other one. We're trying to change the other one. I
think there should be marriage insurance, and I think there
should be marriage and insurance, like there's car insurance, like
there's home insurance, like there's life insurance. And I think
this is what it is. If you decide that you're
gonna get married, that's a big deal. And apparently nobody's
treating it like it is because now it's ending and
everybody's like oh I'm taking everything.

Speaker 2 (26:28):
No, nigga, you're not.

Speaker 1 (26:30):
Cause now I'm fat and got kids, and I done
sat down at home to help take care of these
lashy kids. So I think there should be marriage insurance.

Speaker 2 (26:41):
I think if you.

Speaker 1 (26:41):
Decide marriage insurance is going to be this, we decide
we're getting married. So what we do is there is
an amount of money. We look at what everybody's bringing
in that goes into this insurance pot, so that if
we decide to get a divorce. Whoever is saying they
don't want to give anything, Okay, great, I already have
what I'm taking. I'm taking the marriage insurance money. Okay,

(27:03):
I got a few things to work out, but I
think it makes sense. Hey, guess what.

Speaker 2 (27:07):
There's something very similar to.

Speaker 1 (27:08):
That, a prenup.

Speaker 2 (27:09):
Yes, and why are you running from that?

Speaker 1 (27:12):
No?

Speaker 2 (27:12):
It is though, because you can decide from the jump,
this is what we have, this is what we're sharing.
It's not you sign a prenup, you leave with nothing.
We will talk it out beforehand. But because so you're saying,
the insurance the person who decides to leave.

Speaker 1 (27:28):
Well, the insurance can go up with the prenup. What
I don't like about the prenup is if we do
this prenup and we was both broken, we did the
prenup and there's somebody less. They wrote a book or
something and it blows up and it's like, now you
can stay in there.

Speaker 2 (27:39):
But what if your future endeavors you can you can
spell out Okay.

Speaker 1 (27:43):
If that was never a future endeavor, let's just say
that wasn't a future endeavor and something happens, something happened
that you didn't plan, and somebody got some money, and
it's like, okay, you're leaving here what you came.

Speaker 2 (27:53):
With and how that works. So that's my point. Oh
so if you if you sign a prenup, you can say, okay,
this is what you have, this is what I have.
If we're getting married, we're going into the marriage, we
will decide okay, we're coming together. If this doesn't work out,
you leave with what you came in. I leave with
what I came in and everything that we established during

(28:15):
the marriage. We will split however we decide to split it.
You get to make the terms. There's also a post up.
So if you get married and you didn't do that
shit before, or you need to change it, you can
change it. You make the rules. Every The men especially
would like you to think that a prenup is you
only leave with what you came with. That's not it.

(28:36):
You believe what's an agreement is whatever, and you make
your agreement. I think that time. But if you have
an insurance policy, it's just like when you buy car
insurance right or life insurance. You decide what your policy is,
what the amount is, and.

Speaker 1 (28:51):
What is policy can go up, the price can go up.

Speaker 2 (28:55):
So for your monthly fee.

Speaker 1 (28:57):
Yeah, yeah, both, and we can add on different things
freeing up and marriage insurance. Who's with me? Raise your hand?
At this point, I actually don't even know if I
can do it. I am seeing so many people fail
at this. It doesn't marriage. Yeah, it's starting to be
like what is what happened?

Speaker 2 (29:16):
I don't know, you know what. Honestly, I hate to
say it, don't log off from us, but the people
gotta log off and touch grass. I think people spend
way too much time listening to other people and what
they're going through and taking what other people like podcasters,
media personalities, everybody. That's why I said I hate to

(29:36):
say it, but I think that even sometimes you'll be
writing in a vice Sometimes I'm like, how do you feel?
We can tell you what we think when we're looking
at this, but we are only getting whatever you put
in the email. There's no extra context. Sometimes you gotta
like check in with yourself.

Speaker 1 (29:53):
That is true, you know. I look at sometimes and
I'm like, Wow, she really doesn't care what anyone is saying.
She's like, I love him, Meggan good with Jonathan Major's
she did not give a fuck what everybody was saying.
That baby said, I love him.

Speaker 2 (30:05):
I think she needs a pork chop. I think she
looks beautiful, but I think she needs to eat something.
I don't be seeing her in real life. And yeah,
I don't know more protein. I think a lack of
protein is doing something to the brain. Because that was
all weird. Beautiful girl, beautiful gowns.

Speaker 1 (30:24):
But she didn't care. So she was like, I don't care.

Speaker 2 (30:26):
A lot of people don't and that's going. Do you
think it will last for some reason? I do? How long?
I think a lifetime A long time.

Speaker 1 (30:35):
I think they're going to be together. I think that
real or fake. I think they're gonna be together because
I think when the I think that if the man
is making it, it can last longer. I think that
he is. I think Jonathan made it is in a
position where that he better.

Speaker 2 (30:54):
Count that.

Speaker 1 (30:55):
I mean like, I think he's good. I think that
I think it's gonna stay all right.

Speaker 2 (31:00):
What are your bets on it? I wish it was
on prize picks for one of the maps, I got
one hundred dollars. I met this man one time. He
gave me one hundred dollars on prize picks at gambling
app for the sports. I don't know what he did
for saying I hadn't forgot hey, but I don't know
how to do it. I don't know which way to bet.
I'm gonna try in football season, y'all. Let me know

(31:21):
who I should be betting for when it starts up.
I know it's coming up around the corner. I can't wait.
Do you be going to football games?

Speaker 1 (31:29):
I mean I have, But.

Speaker 2 (31:30):
What's that time a long time ago? No?

Speaker 1 (31:33):
I went to uh oh no, that was a basketball game.
I guess it has been a little minute. But it's
funny because there is a guy that I went on
a date with. I thought he wanted to buy a house.
I did not know this was about to be a
date and I.

Speaker 2 (31:46):
Was the guy you're telling us about.

Speaker 1 (31:48):
No, this is a different man.

Speaker 2 (31:50):
Oh you sweeped another day in the gotcha okay, okay, okay.
So you go on this real estate date.

Speaker 1 (31:59):
Yeah, And I said to him, Oh, I thought you
wanted to do about real estate, Like, we got to
talk about some real estate if if you want to stay.
And we did, and he is, he's pretty done, really
well for himself and is in a good circle. And
I was like, you need to I'm starting to, you know.
We were talking about boundaries and stuff I'm.

Speaker 2 (32:16):
Starting to do.

Speaker 1 (32:16):
I'm starting to be really good with like business boundaries,
like oh, good things and not feeling like like I
don't want to see come off this way. No, y'all
need to buy some houses. I don't really know what
to tell you, like I don't waste my time. Yeah,
And I'm not dating and really standing on that. And
there are some people that have been like not listening

(32:37):
to I'm not dating. And so you keep communicating with
me in a way that you think you're gonna I'm
not responding in the way I'm not calling.

Speaker 2 (32:44):
I'm about to pull my panties to the side for you. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (32:46):
The one dude to me A damman was like, oh,
I see what you're doing. Good good, But if you
know which one to purchase a home or if you
want to purchase a home, even though I don't want
to date you, we can still do that. It's not
no anyway. So the one dude, I still have phone
with him though, Like this, this guy that we ended
up going to Takakia is really good. The food is good.

Speaker 2 (33:06):
Oh yeah, I love that place. Yeah, you know, I
love me in Persian restaurant me too.

Speaker 1 (33:12):
I used to not really care for them, but now
I'm like little greatly. Anyways, I was like, granted, you
need to refer a few people to me, and he
was like, I got you for real, and now you're
on my newsletter. So what you're trying to do?

Speaker 2 (33:27):
Buy housing? All right? Okay, got it off my phone.

Speaker 1 (33:30):
Yeah, I don't really have the pages where I was
going somewhere with that, but I forgot where I was going.

Speaker 2 (33:35):
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Speaker 2 (36:24):
People wasting your time, men feeling entitled. Perhaps that's what
I was saying, sound bitter, bitter. I tried to do it.
It didn't come out. Maybe, but I don't really care.
I don't. I have had surely moments where I knew

(36:46):
that I sounded bitter. Whether I felt that or not,
I have absolutely felt bitter, bitter, bitcher, bitter to the core.

Speaker 1 (36:55):
I'm not though, because sometimes I'm like, is it bitter
or is it like it's when we were talking about
with Ashley, like a lot of things were created to
really benefit men, and it seems like the women that
see that and talk about it, it's like you're just
mad because you don't have a man.

Speaker 2 (37:12):
Okay, that's not true. It's just trying to figure this
out my whole fucking life. Okay, the well, where is
your man at? That's why you're single? Shut the fuck up?
Because you might not be single. You might have had
ten long term relationships. Well what does that say about

(37:34):
you if you've had If you're forty and you've had
ten long term relationships and you're still not happy? I
think we might be riding on the same fucking boat. Bitch,
get back to the back in your seat now. There
have been times where I will honestly say I was bitter.
I was depressed. I did not feel good. I didn't
feel good about myself. I didn't feel good about the
decisions I was making. But bitterer because you didn't have

(37:57):
a man, not better because I didn't have a man.

Speaker 1 (37:59):
I think the bitterness was like life was just not
going how you thought it was.

Speaker 2 (38:04):
It wasn't going how I wanted to go, and I
was upset and disappointed in myself because it's like, have
you ever felt like I know that I'm making bad decisions.
I know what I should be doing, but for whatever reason,
I'm over here like fucking can't get right. I just
I just keep doing the wrong thing. I know what

(38:27):
is right, and I'm trying, but I'm not. I'm not
doing it. Something's not clicking, something's wrong.

Speaker 1 (38:32):
But is that bitter or is that depressed?

Speaker 2 (38:35):
I was both? But I think that like, Okay, I
was depressed. His nigga's walking up in here. Okay, there's
some different looking ones. These ain't the ones from early
These ain't the interns. We gotta hurry up, listen or
not shift this week. Okay, I couldn't either. These lights
is bright, but that's all right. We look cute. That's
what matters. I should probably cover my booty cheek up.

(38:56):
I forgot I had on these panty shorts. My bad, y'all.
It's all well, but I'm gonna stand on. It was
giving bitter because that is kind of how I felt, like.
You know, I don't know if you know or not,
but I will say I felt like, not only was
I depressed, disappointing myself, upset at like so many different things,

(39:20):
I never felt like I couldn't get out of it.
I knew that it was well. I prayed and hoped
that it was temporary. But I'm gonna say that it
was bitter because it wasn't like I had a bad
experience and I'm having a bad day. I started to
as a result of everything else, the depression and everything else,

(39:40):
I started to have a negative view of everybody and everything.
And it's just like I'm listening to other people, even
shit I wasn't going through, but I'm listening to people
who have had shitty situations. And I started to like
accept that as this is what it is.

Speaker 1 (40:00):
To me.

Speaker 2 (40:03):
That's not okay, that's not how I truly want to be.
I'm not there now, but I was, and it's like, okay,
I've got to get out of this and make sure
that I'm forming my own opinions because I'm listening to
everybody else and I'm not listening to me. And that's
another thing that's causing like this weird feeling in my

(40:27):
body is because everything is at odds and I don't
even know how I feel. So until I feel strong
enough to be sure of what I think, I can't
be listening to too much of what everybody else says
because people will speak as if it is fact because
that is their experience and maybe it is a fact
for their life. But I do not believe that all

(40:48):
of us are the same. I don't think all men
are bad. I don't think all women are bad a lot,
but not all. And I just I was sucking that
and just like not seeing the light in that moment
is the main thing. That's like nailing the coffin to
that was bitter, yeah, And I'm happy to not be there,

(41:10):
and I sometimes I feel it kind of trying to
poke out, especially when I'm listening to other people and
they're going through shit, or I'm about to be on
my period or am on my period. I mean, so
it's like most of the month, but one week after month,
I'm good. Same. And that's when I try to have
these self reflective moments because every other time, like my day,
might I.

Speaker 1 (41:31):
Think my mind is right, But I also think that
sometimes I guess maybe sometimes I don't want to call
it bitter. I just want to call it like something else,
because there's.

Speaker 2 (41:39):
A bitter makes you uncomfortable. It doesn't say that.

Speaker 1 (41:41):
I just don't know if that's the right way to
describe it, because Okay, all men are not one way
and all women are not one way, but we do.
Then you you do look at certain things and you're like,
I mean, well a lot of you. I can always
bring it back to okay, when people are having babies,
and again, if you're a woman, you probably have had
friends have babies, sisters who had babies, cousins, and you see.

Speaker 2 (42:03):
Babies to heaven yeah huh, sent some babies to heaven,
oh yeah, or somewhere else.

Speaker 1 (42:09):
And you see, like I feel like women see the
things that you see when women have babies, there's a
lot that goes into it. Your body, for instance, is
like gone, like you are literally lending your body to
have a baby. And then you look at like lately
I've been looking at like, okay, all the preparation that
women do, even when you're married, Like all the preparation

(42:32):
that women do to make sure that you're gonna at
least try to be a good mom, going to a
lama's class, doing things to like prep to be a mom,
reading books about you're about to be a parent, reading
things about a baby, and making sure you understand the
different stages of their lives. And even the good men.
I look at the men and I'm like, do y'all
have a group? Are you seeking guidance to become a parent.

Speaker 2 (42:55):
In fantasy football? Are you in high school dreams? That's
their community?

Speaker 1 (43:00):
Are you seeking communities to learn how to be a dad,
to know what the child does at different stages? And
all I'm saying is I don't see it. I'm not
saying it's not real, but can someone send me a group?
When the women go to the Lebonn's class, the women
are normally like, let's go to this in the middle, like,
we don't need that. You do need it, You need it.

(43:22):
You've never done this before, and so in my mind
is going like what, okay, so all men don't do this.

Speaker 3 (43:30):
But.

Speaker 2 (43:31):
Where is the group?

Speaker 1 (43:34):
What do y'all do to prepare for the things you
don't because you know the woman's gonna do it.

Speaker 2 (43:40):
And you know what they do. They go to work
and their excuses, well, I'm making money.

Speaker 1 (43:46):
What if your wife dies?

Speaker 2 (43:48):
You know what I mean? Like that, I don't understand
what you're gonna do. You don't even know when they
supposed to get their motherfucking teeth. You're gonna be trying
to give these babies happy meals at three months old.
That baby will choke and die next thing. You know,
you sitting in prison. Is that what you want for
your life?

Speaker 1 (44:05):
I mean, I really am just like, why can't we
just say the truth? Y'all don't try to do certain things.

Speaker 2 (44:14):
They feel like it's women's business. But the moment I
asked you to pick something up, you want to remind
me that I said I was independent. I told you
I have to be independent. This is not a choice,
it is by circumstance. I would love to sit back
and grow corn in my backyard at my estate. Dry

(44:35):
out those kernels, shave them down, put them in paper
bags with everybody's names and their birthstones, and let you
pop them in some new age microwave. Like Megan Markle,
I want to be doing fucking arts and crafts. I
want to be sitting on my thing. I hell no,
because let me tell you that I have done seen

(44:55):
some things on that side, not from my own personal
experiences outside looking in, but I was close enough. No,
and I'm not going over there. You tried, and you
can report. A woman once told me who's been with
the whites a black woman, and she was like, you know,
people feel like and I'm like, you're saying people, but

(45:17):
I think this is just you sharing your feelings. But
it don't matter. People feel like, oh you date a
white man, You're not gonna have to deal with this.
They have their bullshit too. I bet I think everybody does.
And uh yeah, I And again, I don't want to
make me.

Speaker 1 (45:36):
I don't know what I want, but what I do
know is.

Speaker 2 (45:39):
A rip from Fox brothers. Brothers, but I have them
on Friday.

Speaker 1 (45:47):
I just want happiness, honesty and peace.

Speaker 2 (45:52):
What's the last thing that made you happy.

Speaker 1 (45:55):
M The last thing that made me happy.

Speaker 2 (45:59):
Was place where thing it doesn't matter anything where you
really was like I feel good right now, you know.

Speaker 1 (46:06):
And this was recently, and this has to do with
real estate. I will say that real estate lately has
had me really happy. Like even just like sometimes when
I'm up late working and like if I'm talking to
it from They're like, you need to go to sleep,
and it was like, I don't know, I actually am
like enjoying reading this or creating this, or like learning
how to find an avenue for my client. Like I
had a moment where like I had to really like

(46:28):
give myself a pat on the back and realize I've
only been doing this for a year.

Speaker 2 (46:32):
And I got an email the other day that.

Speaker 1 (46:34):
Said I had made I hit a certain amount of
money made in real estate that I'm considered like I
can call myself just like a luxury agent and they
send me like there's this whole luxury group and like
you get like into a door. So yeah, and I
just felt really really good. I was like, oh my gosh,

(46:55):
like I did that, like because I did that, and
God did that and a lot of y'all don't know,
I don't talk about the real estate path a lot.
Really quick. I'll keep it really quick. My ex made
me feel like a broke bach. He started to do
that and started to be like, you know, we talked
about it, and so when we ended things and everything
went left, and it was really sad and.

Speaker 2 (47:15):
I it was rough.

Speaker 1 (47:16):
Maybe I'll talk about it one day, but it was rough,
and I didn't really have anything, and I was just praying.
And one day I got a call from a guy
and I didn't know who it wasn't honestly thought I
was going to get murdered, but I didn't. He wanted
to go say that he wanted to go see a house.
And being a real estate agent is really expensive. No
one tells you that when.

Speaker 2 (47:36):
You get in it. I heard about this.

Speaker 1 (47:38):
There's so much you have to pay for. And I
was so deep in that. I was like, I gotta
keep doing it because I got it. I have this
has to work.

Speaker 2 (47:45):
I remember saying, yeah, it's too late to turn out.

Speaker 3 (47:47):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (47:48):
And anyways, this man had called me and he ended
up being my first client. He didn't know that, and
he bought a home for one point three million dollars
and that commission check was thirty nine thousand dollars and
I really need it. And even that, like I learned
what needed to be learned to get through what needed
to get through, because there was a lot of issues.

(48:10):
Every deal that I've had, minus Lex has had like
these things where people like this just doesn't happen. But
you were in the crash course and one of one
of my mentors was like, you know what agents like this,
like real people who get in real estate and this
type of shit be happening. You got a great you
have a great thing ahead of you for real like
you you you got it, and so like that, real

(48:31):
estate has been making me happy, bro, like wow, and
it feels good and I feel good and even though
i'd be soundest sad, y'all, I'm good for real now.

Speaker 2 (48:43):
I just want to also point out this time last year,
we were at another studio and you were stressed about
real estate. And I don't know a lot about real estate,
but I was like, but what I do know is
like most people Medina has been talking about selling houses, right.

(49:03):
I remember saying something to you, and I knew this
because I know a lot of people who get into it.
A lot of people don't be selling stuff in their
first year. It takes a year. This girl, once she
did the test, she got her certificate, whatever you call it.
She's licensed. She can do the damn thing. It wasn't
even six months, Medina, and you sold a home over

(49:26):
a million dollars in this economy, and I'm like, she's
over your stress. And I'm like, Okay, I don't know
what all is going on. I get it because when
you work hard, you want to see some results, So
I get it. But I'm like, she's been really hard
on herself and then you sold that and you seld
more and it's just like mine, what a difference a
year make. So I hope that you are really proud

(49:48):
of yourself. And sometimes I hope that you go back
and think about that it's only been a year. Has
it even been one full? Just year?

Speaker 1 (49:56):
Just I'm bad at looking at stuff like that.

Speaker 2 (49:59):
It's just July.

Speaker 1 (50:01):
My year was sometime in June. I don't know when
it was, but it was in June. And one a
guy that I went to school, he told me that
he was like, because he hadn't sold anything, he actually.

Speaker 2 (50:08):
Exactly, he's the average. Yeah, Because I was like Okay,
you want to sell it like, that's good, but like
from what I art, most people don't. Not that you can't,
but most people don't. So don't be hard on yourself,
is what I was saying. I'm like, well, you know,
when you care about something, you care and don't matter
what everybody else to do. I don't give a fuck.

(50:29):
I'm trying to do the damn thing anyway. Proud of
you and I'm happy for you. Hopefully one day I
can be a client.

Speaker 1 (50:36):
Oh you definitely will be. How much fun will that be?

Speaker 2 (50:39):
Can y'all imagine a bunch of stuff? I ought to
share the notes so you can.

Speaker 1 (50:44):
Just sorry to keep my eye out put a pin
in that. Now that's gonna be fun.

Speaker 2 (50:48):
And just I need to also remind myself by these
lottery tickets. Some of this ship. I don't know how
I could ever earn the money. Well you get alone, No,
I mean like to quality. I mean I'll be looking
at ship like bitch, calm down.

Speaker 1 (51:01):
I had to tell Lexa.

Speaker 2 (51:02):
Also, I was like, because I'd be looking at Beyonce
style home. Yeah, but really I wouldn't waste your time
like that.

Speaker 1 (51:10):
I have a but you can if there ever is
a house you just want to go see a play?
We could go through.

Speaker 2 (51:14):
No, okay, I didn't know you had time for that,
because I'm gonna be bookier. But realistically, I have like
on Zillo and the other apps and stuff and all
these other sites I'd be saving realistic dream. One of
Jay's franch's about the house is in Douglasville. I better
say that he got a nice little bang for his bug,

(51:36):
brand new bill and shout out to you, Matt. Him
and his fiance got the house brand new. Construction is huge.
The thing that made me go I said, oh my god,
I'm old. The pot filler ladies comes out over the stove.
And then I wasn't gonna ask, but I was thinking it,
so I'm glad he did. He was like, y'all, ain't

(51:57):
get gassed because I just feel like you need a
gas though in a kitchen like that. He was like, man, no,
but only because they don't have it available there. And
that was something else. So that's something to consider. I
need to be somewhere where a gas stove is available.
I need a good outdoor kitchen. Even if I got
to like make everything else smaller, I need outdoor kitchen

(52:20):
for my crawfish, bulls and barbecuing.

Speaker 1 (52:22):
Okay, Okay, I need a gas I don't have to
have a gas line.

Speaker 2 (52:26):
I can get a propane tank. That's not a big deal.
But I need outdoor kitchen area, crawfish board. When I barbecue,
I'm gonna have charcoal. I'm not hang heel. But this
ain't about that. I've got a lot of things. But yeah,
I got you, and I got a bunch of examples.
I like the what is it French something style? These

(52:48):
these trendy uh modern farmhouses.

Speaker 1 (52:51):
They're okay, they're starting to go overboard with them though
it's like, okay, y'all, I.

Speaker 2 (52:55):
Don't know about that. A funch provincial or something like that.

Speaker 1 (52:59):
I think it's called the houses white.

Speaker 2 (53:01):
I like them, the white houses. Yes, I'm loving the
white and black. And I'd be looking at home, like, okay,
it's white and black right now. How would I feel
if I didn't want to totally redo the exterior, but
I just want to change the color. Would I still
like it? That's something that I want to think about.
I would like my first purchase, if it's my goddamn money.

(53:22):
I want to live there after. I want to do
the investment property, but I need a home. I can't
see you see it. It will come. I I was
talking to someone who wants to buy a home. I'm
not ready to have them talk to you yet because

(53:43):
I need to convince them that it's a home that
I would want.

Speaker 1 (53:46):
Oh. Well, the house is beautiful Douglasville.

Speaker 2 (53:51):
If it was well in a big ass house, yeah,
I could because they got land too, acres and acres.
Goat it's room for that. I don't want that. Uh.
And I would ask you to have a fence if
you are my neighbor. I want a little garden with
things to eat. Yeah, not just flowers for the front.

(54:12):
I need some leftuce. I need herbs. Anyway, y'all please
share this episode where everybody, so we can back and
buy a house. Yeah, and so I can sell yeah yeah,
I need somewhere money. Oh. Also, please continue to check
out XO Man podcast. Leave comments on there, watch it everything.

Speaker 1 (54:33):
My sister is reading Will Packer's book right now.

Speaker 2 (54:37):
This is a good book.

Speaker 1 (54:38):
I forgot what it's called to me, but she was like,
you have she talks about it every day. She's obsessed
with him.

Speaker 2 (54:42):
And I was like, I have the book. You want it, Yeah,
I'll just give it to you because I have like
you like to read the book to read it in
your car? No, but I can get it to you tomorrow.

Speaker 1 (54:53):
Yeah, let me get it. Read the plane.

Speaker 2 (54:56):
It's a really good book.

Speaker 1 (54:58):
And your episode with U. Why was I about to
say Bernie Mac It wasn't Bernie dead, David Banner. I
was really good. I am really flirting.

Speaker 2 (55:13):
Don't get in trouble now. Who's gonna check me booth?
I don't know, because nobody brought me no house and
I paid my rent, so again, who gonna check me?
No one? Okay, I mean they could try.

Speaker 1 (55:29):
I really do wonder if I am ever gonna get
a man and what he gonna be like.

Speaker 2 (55:33):
I wonder if I'm ever gonna be able to commit
to somebody or any I mean, I can't commit to
a damn outfit half the time. And I just feel
like I just need patience. I don't know, maybe I
need more.

Speaker 1 (55:44):
Ma me means, because sometimes I don't wonder the stuff
that I was going through, it was like, well, y'all
going through that, and then y'all just worked through it
and got through it, and it was like yeah, he
did used to abuse me, but we're good now.

Speaker 2 (55:52):
I would hope not. Also, Okay, this is so random,
but I have to ask y'all, don't think I'm crazy
and it's gonna be time for all of us to
walk off. I told you already about my obsession with
the time loops, time travel and all that shit. Right,
it ain't gone nowhere, I promise you. I don't know
if it was the weed drink that I had because
I have one to go to bed, because I was
not going to go to sleep, and I was like,

(56:13):
I've got to get some sleep. I don't know if
it was that or just something was happening. I started
having a weird feeling while I was laying in the bed,
and I was like, I think.

Speaker 4 (56:21):
There's a parallel universe definitely, and my person is in
there is trying to get over or maybe she like
trip if she's really me a woman, Well, I mean
it's a parallel you.

Speaker 1 (56:34):
I'm a wall it's you, yeah, But I mean like.

Speaker 2 (56:36):
My person on the other side, on the other side
of this this our universe, that's their universe. Don't need
to stay over there. Sometimes people bend here. Well, that's
why I think I was feeling uncomfortable because something happened
because she was like stuck in a portal or something,
and I had to go people. I wasn't getting up.
I was like, is it in the bathroom? Like I
don't fucking know. Anyway, it was feeling weird. I was

(56:58):
seeing weird things. But I also was trying to edit
a video on cap cut where it does like the outline,
so it could have been a combination of both. Anyway,
can everybody span my sister Mallory alexis m A L
A R I A L e X. I ask on
whatever social media and tell her please just edit all
of my videos. I cried later on for it and

(57:19):
cried it was just a rough time, so it's probably
just a psychotic break. And then I'm saying this out loud,
thank you all for listening. But I did kind of
feel like somebody was trying to tug me, and I
do wonder I'm not joking. Have I ever went somewhere
else and then made it back, whether it was like
going to a different time period or going to a

(57:41):
parallel universe. Has anybody had an experience like this? I've
been watching too much spooky scary storytime from Ashley Inc.
On the YouTube and the Tiki Tak and everything. Often
I want to know if y'all have, because I think
I have, And I think that's why sometimes I feel
so convinced that something happens and I be feeling like
people are gas fighting me or whatever, because I know

(58:02):
it happened, but I'm like I was on the other side, or.

Speaker 1 (58:05):
You were dehydrated.

Speaker 2 (58:08):
That could be true.

Speaker 1 (58:09):
But sometimes it's like, nah, okay, we should go do
an ayahuasca trip.

Speaker 2 (58:14):
See now you talk about real drug.

Speaker 1 (58:16):
I mean, let's just go ahead and go there.

Speaker 2 (58:17):
You wonder aluasca? Yeah, that does time travel.

Speaker 1 (58:20):
It took me to a.

Speaker 2 (58:23):
Wait a minute, I didn't know that. No need and
do it on door dash because I get my drugs.
I get drippy and my rosewater lemonade with the ta.

Speaker 1 (58:39):
We need to go to and that would be fine
if you want to come. You guys, just put a
little plant in the comment section. Not no, We're gonna
take a break and we come back. We have some
advice to read for you guys.

Speaker 2 (58:54):
Losing weight and improving your help does not have to
feel impossible. I feel like you can trust that for me,
because y'all know I will give up at the drop
of a dime. I don't like working out. I don't
like eating healthy all the time because sometimes it's like, Okay,
you want to combat a problem or you know, whether
it's like truly like health or just vanity. Because I

(59:16):
got both, I get discourage very easily, y'all. I have
never felt this way about any of the things that
I have done or taken to try and do better
with taking care of myself is so much easier. I'm
not feeling discouraged. I am seeing results everything that they
have said was going to happen. I'm doing it for

(59:37):
weight loss. I don't know what the medicine is called.
It's touched the tea, but it is great because what's
happening is I'm not having those sugar cravings like I
used to. It only happens. I'll be honest. There were
days where I wasn't taking my medicine like I was
supposed to do. I'm supposed to take it every day.
That's user error. So if you're not doing the instructions,

(59:59):
that could happen. But when you get back on it,
it's just like, ah, I'm good, Like I was turning down.
So I was in Houston, you guys, where there's so
much great food, and I was turning stuff down. I
was like, Oh, I'm just gonna have this. I just
want a little We all stopped at the table at
one day, like, what's going on, baby, I'm on that
life OURX plan and they are getting my gut right,

(01:00:19):
they're getting this body right. I am dropping pounds, I
am feeling lighter, I'm sleeping better. They didn't even say
that that is what would happen. I just can't tell
y'all how much I love it. And I love that
even though I was rambling during my appointment with the
medical professional, because that's what you'll do when you start off.
You talk to somebody and you tell them what you're
trying to do, what your concerns are, talk about your history,

(01:00:42):
you know all that stuff. You're really talking to somebody.
They're not giving everyone the same thing, and they're going
to make sure that you know they're monitoring what's going on.
You have to check in every month, and I like
that because I don't want you just ship me stuff
without ever checking in. Then I feel like, well, what
am I taking? You know, you don't have to worry
about any of that. I am feeling good on it.

(01:01:04):
I'm loving it. How has your experience been?

Speaker 1 (01:01:06):
So my journey with lifear x empty is really it's interesting.
I at first was on the breakup diet, like I
just wasn't eating and I wasn't working out, and I
was just not being healthy by not eating, and so
it's interesting, Like the journey was, Okay, bitch, you gotta
eat some food and you need to start working out.
One of my friends made me start working out. So

(01:01:27):
when you implement working out, did that? Then I was like,
let me actually start eating right, eating right, and then
the lifear x you can remix it how you want
to remix it. If you are like, bitch, I'm not
about to be working out, cool, you can take the pill.
You're still gonna be or whatever medicine they give you. You're
still going to lose weight. In my journey, I was like, Okay,
I want to lose weight and build muscle, and I

(01:01:48):
don't want to lose too much weight. So they capped
me at like the number where it's like this will
help me just maintain what I was building. And I
absolutely love that I have the power to do that
because I was losing weight, but there was like a
little pudge that I just couldn't get rid of. There
was two rolls on the back of my sides, Kiki.
I've never been able to get rid of those roles.
They I took a video in the gym the other day.

(01:02:11):
I asked my girl and I said, well, you take
a video of my back. The roles are gone. And
I know that's the life our XMD Like, I'm just
like you. Sometimes you just need a little help. So
you might be listening and be like, I don't want
to be walking around look like a bobblehead. You don't
have to. You might just want to lose like a
few little pounds and you can. You can do that,
and that's what I just love it. I also love
that there's no contracts if you try it and you're like,
I don't want to re up. I don't want to,

(01:02:33):
you don't have to.

Speaker 2 (01:02:34):
Yeah, whatever.

Speaker 1 (01:02:35):
I can honestly say, I'm wholeheartedly excited about this brand,
and I've been looking at before and after photos. I
just did this last night, and I cannot believe just
where I'm at right now. It also helped me chisel
down my face, like you can't do that working out
like you know what I mean, Like it helps you

(01:02:56):
target some of those areas that really are just difficult.
I don't care what y'all say.

Speaker 2 (01:03:01):
I love it. I love it too. I have been
very pleased. I am so happy that we are working
with them. I'm happy with the overall experience, and I
am going to continue to use them. I have more goals.
And then I was like, you know what, I've scheduled
another appointment because I wanted to talk to them and
just like address some other little things going on and

(01:03:25):
just see if they maybe have something to help me.
And so I'll keep your guys posted about that and
let you know if there's anything else. But I know
that they do stuff for like men's hair loss. Oh,
they just stuff for a rectile dysfunction. There is no
reason to be walking around here with the what's his
name George Jefferson and a limp noodle if you don't

(01:03:52):
have to, if you want to live your life like that,
your baby that ain't got nothing to do with me.
But if you don't want to, there's no reason and
there's no shame. We all need a little.

Speaker 1 (01:04:01):
Help and it makes me even wonder like I don't
know how to put ribs down. You know how we
always talk about the men with the big hips and
how it's really hard because you were just born like that.

Speaker 2 (01:04:09):
But if it's fat and not just a wide set
perfect bone because your bones, if you really are big
bone down there, I mean, they can't do nothing about that.
But if it's a little stubborn.

Speaker 1 (01:04:18):
Fast, just try it and tell us how you like it.

Speaker 2 (01:04:22):
And it's for everybody. It's not just a women, women
in everybody, yeah, no matter what it is. Yeah, y'all
gotta check it out. So enough of us telling you
about how much we love it. We want you to
try it. If you have it already, and if you have,
y'all should hit us up, send us an email or
DM and let us know how it's going for you. Anyway,
just visit life our X dot M D and use

(01:04:43):
our code cocktails c O C K T A L
S T A l e S at checkout and get
fifty dollars off your first month to get started today.
We could all save a little book you know that's
l I F E R X dot M and use
code cocktails to start your journey to a healthier youth

(01:05:04):
with support that actually works. The link is in the
description box below.

Speaker 6 (01:05:09):
And now we'll get back to the show. All right,

(01:05:38):
you guys, we are back and it's time for the advice.
If you have a question that you want us to
possibly answer on the show, hopefully it's not a dire need,
email us advice at cocktailspod dot com.

Speaker 2 (01:05:50):
Okay, you want to read it? Yeah, okay, I'm gonna
do the side check one. Okay, So this one says,
am I the side check or the wife without a ring?
If you want to ask, why ain't I no ring?
If you think you a wife, you're not the wife,
but you are without a ring. I'm sorry, let me
read it.

Speaker 1 (01:06:09):
She thinks he's gonna propose.

Speaker 2 (01:06:11):
Okay, Okay, don't hold her brother? Oh sorry, Okay, in
her thoughts was just escaping. Hey, Kiki and Medina, love
y'all so much. Please help because I am spiraling in silence.
I've been dating this guy for seven months. I was
gonna say years.

Speaker 1 (01:06:29):
Okay.

Speaker 2 (01:06:30):
He's consistent, sweet, fine and tells me all the right things.
We've met each other's families, gone on trips, and I
keep a toothbrush at his house. She didn't say how
old she was. Okay, but he refuses to call me
his girlfriend. He says, is this me? It's like I

(01:06:51):
got flipped and wrote the letters. Our performative. Titles are performative.

Speaker 3 (01:06:58):
I'm not mad at him.

Speaker 2 (01:06:59):
Okay. He says titles are performative and that he's not
trying to do what society says we have to do.
I'm starting to feel like I'm playing wife with no benefits.
But every time I try to end it, he says,
I'm overthinking and we're good. Am I being slow?

Speaker 1 (01:07:13):
Yes?

Speaker 2 (01:07:14):
Or is this man spiritually single? Help me get my
mind back side? And the title is wonder Okay, you're wondering.
He doesn't want the title, right, Okay, there's no negating that.
What do you want? Is he gonna give it to you?
If it's the title, he says, no, then why are

(01:07:35):
you dealing with it?

Speaker 1 (01:07:36):
Because women have really been this seven months but the
bullshit and it's like, I really hope that I get
to have daughters because I'm not doing this to them.
We all are fucked up. I mean, that's really just
what it comes down to here. This is why we
question ourselves. We second. Guess it's like he literally he
said it, and I'm not.

Speaker 2 (01:07:53):
I've said what he says. He said what he said,
and we all do this. Girl.

Speaker 1 (01:07:57):
Some of us make it through and passed the test,
and then a lot of us he said it, and
you're still like, does he love me? He doesn't. And
that's just we have a hard time really seeing the truth.
The man is showing you the truth. So the answer is, yes,
you're being slow. I don't know what to tell you.
You want a title, he doesn't want a title. Do

(01:08:18):
you know what that means? That means you move on?
And if he really does see the value in you
and he chases you and comes back and it's like,
you know what I was wrong?

Speaker 2 (01:08:24):
You were right?

Speaker 1 (01:08:25):
Then cool, then maybe you can do it. But you're
gonna be fighting for something that you want. He doesn't
want it. I can't keep I feel bad for us,
I really do. The world was made for men.

Speaker 2 (01:08:37):
This is a man's world. Ain't know what James Brown said.
He wants to jail plenty of times and got out
and we're still out here terrorizing the streets and beating
on women. So yeah, I think you're right about that.
Now what I'll say this, I don't think that because
he doesn't want what you want means that he doesn't
love you. But you also didn't tell this that he
ever said it. Think about that one two. At the

(01:08:59):
end of the day, no matter how he feels about you,
he does not feel like committing to you. And it
sounds like this is a major issue for you. What
is the good You have to answer this for yourself,
But what is the good in holding on to somebody
when the biggest thing that you want they literally have

(01:09:21):
refused and stonewalled you. And then when you want to leave,
they want to keep you there, but they're not willing
to give it. So why do you keep staying when
he pulls you back? Do you think that him doing
that like something is going to change as a person
who is kind of like him in the sense of

(01:09:43):
I don't think the titles are always performative. Sometimes they are.
Sometimes people feel like, well, it's like a possessive thing.
I don't like that. There's a ton of things that
I don't like, but there are some things that I
do like. So I don't feel like I never want
to have a title, but I also don't want to

(01:10:04):
pacifize somebody who hasn't done what I have said I
want and give you the title in hopes that things
will change. You got to stop holding on to this
man hoping that things will change. This is what you want.
If he doesn't want to give it, you have to
move on. If he changes his mind and can find you,
then you can revisit it at that point. And that's

(01:10:27):
just it. Stop being stuck here. You're not happy, That's
why you wrote us. Ali.

Speaker 1 (01:10:33):
I just think it's so crazy how men really don't
move like that. If the man I just was telling
y'all last week, I was like, oh, no, I don't
want to have sex right now.

Speaker 2 (01:10:41):
It wasn't like he was like I get it. He
was like, no, you need to have sex. I guess
when a man has But once he gets to the
point of a rectile dysfunction, you're supposed to be understanding
to think about that, and you.

Speaker 1 (01:10:51):
Will be nine times out of ten, I don't understand.
I'm going home will.

Speaker 2 (01:10:54):
Be number ten. All right, Well, y'all keep sending us
this advice and we're gonna give it to you. Like
it just He is vice at cocktailspot dot com. Rawn
Strike Straight unlike some people. Cocktails, okay, you want to
isn't long?

Speaker 3 (01:11:10):
Long?

Speaker 2 (01:11:11):
Isn't okay? We're not doing that. Neither too long? Read
a sipid that already? Is it long? I see you?
You just keep scrolling.

Speaker 1 (01:11:21):
You guys will read cocktails. Next week for real, we'll
have a whole episode of coming. Try to make some
This is long. Thank you for listening to the show.
We love you. I'm really tired. Honestly, we've been here
and I didn't go to sleep last night until six
am because I couldn't go to sleep and.

Speaker 2 (01:11:35):
And I had to be a mother, and so y'all
know i'd be upset about that for three weeks. I
ain't gonna say nothing right now because I found out
people be googling me.

Speaker 1 (01:11:46):
So so send in your cocktails, still, send them in.
If it's long, send it in, send it in. Next
week we will be revitalizing, ready to take on the
world with vacoline on our faces.

Speaker 2 (01:11:55):
Thank you for listening. The children up I just got.
But once you said later, I was like, i'mna be
extra shoty sitting in here like a damn Christmas ornament. Anyway,
Me and Blondie, one of my blondies will be back.

Speaker 1 (01:12:09):
Yeah, if y'all really would want to do an Aowaska
trip with Kiki and I, please do let us know
because then that maybe could be something that we could
put together. And that's really not an expensive trip because
it's not. Peru is cheap and you know what I love,
say in the jungle.

Speaker 2 (01:12:21):
Peruvian chicken, and that is my ship. Also, if you
make wigs, hit me up. I would like one for
free in exchange, but I'll buy one because I want
some more wigs. I don't know when I'm gonna get
a great appointment. Life is rough. Pray for us virtual hugs.
Woo woo. We will see you guys soon. Checks the
description box for everything. And until next time you guys,

(01:12:44):
good bye.

Speaker 3 (01:12:45):
Good bye bye bye bye bye bye bye bye bye
bye

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