The Truth About ‘Vibes’ Dating: Why Men Think Basic Questions Are ‘Too Much’

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
Yeah, yeah, Check one two, check one two. Is this
Mike On? Is this Mike On?

Speaker 2 (00:06):
Hey?

Speaker 1 (00:06):
Listen, man, it's the one and.

Speaker 3 (00:08):
Only trunks that a DJ sis and you're listening to
cocktails Dirty Discussions with Kikia Medina Monroe.

Speaker 1 (00:14):
Here.

Speaker 3 (00:19):
Today's cocktail is called the pH Balancer. Yep, you heard
it right. The ingredients you need to make a pH
balancer is not only the doctor, but two ounces of vodka,
one ounce of fresh lemon juice, point seventy five ounces
of honey syrup or some simple syrup, a splash of
some cranberry juice, two to three slices of cucumber for
balance and hydration, some club soda to top it off,

(00:42):
and then you're gonna garnish it with a that cucumber
wheel or a lemon twist, or both if you're nasty.
Here's how you're gonna make a pH balancer. You're gonna
muddle that cucumber gently at the bottom of the shaker,
Add the vodka, the lemon juice, and the honey, shake
it up, strain it over ice in a tall, cute
little glass, splash of cranberry for color, and then top
it with the club soda. Garnish with your cucumber, will

(01:05):
and enjoy having your pH balanced.

Speaker 1 (01:09):
Welcome back to Cocktail's Dirty Discussions, you guys.

Speaker 3 (01:12):
Kiki said, so hey, y'all, I am Medina Monroe.

Speaker 1 (01:16):
Now I have never had this exact cocktail before, but
I did have one very similar. I like the cucumber
and lemon with vodka because vodka doesn't really taste like
much right, Like, it's easy to manipulate that taste, and
I found it to be so refreshing. I like the

(01:36):
Kettle One botanical line. They have like a peach and something.
There's maybe cucumber and mint, or maybe it's just cucumber,
and like a few other ones, it doesn't taste like much,
but it gives you that botanical flavor and I like it.
Crispy fresh cocktail with the club soda to top it off,
give it a little bubble.

Speaker 3 (01:55):
Yeah, you feel like you're just chilling in the Hampton's
rich m h.

Speaker 1 (01:59):
Wow. Well, we are back this week with another episode,
and I want to remind everybody to make sure that
you tune in for the entire episode because we've moved
our announcements to the end and we do have some
things that we want to make sure we share with
you this week before we get into our topics.

Speaker 3 (02:18):
I was pre reading your weird sex and want to
I want to hear like.

Speaker 1 (02:23):
I was like, what is this? Okay, well we can
go ahead and get started with weird sex because this
is something that one of our listeners sent to me.
And I was like, girl, what the helly you said?

Speaker 2 (02:36):
A man is not a necessity.

Speaker 3 (02:38):
A man is a luxury like dessert.

Speaker 1 (02:42):
Yeah, a man is absolutely not necessity.

Speaker 3 (02:45):
Did you mean that to sound meaning better?

Speaker 2 (02:48):
Oh not at all.

Speaker 1 (02:50):
I adore dessert. I love man.

Speaker 2 (02:52):
I think men are the coolest, but you don't.

Speaker 1 (02:54):
Really need them to live. Okay, So this week's weird sex.
So a girl wrote in saying she was dating this
man who was very into natural healing, like he believed
cocon oil, coconut oil could cure heartbreak and tea tree
oil could fix generational trauma, you know, like kind of

(03:17):
like the hotepee type is what I got in our
back and forth. And she's just like he always had
an oil, a serum or something that came from the
earth that he felt like would really cure things, but
on its own, and so that no, uh, he was
just doing weird shit. Okay, so one night, but before
she realized everything was just weird, you know, sometimes you
still got to test those waters. You don't know until

(03:39):
you know. So one night they're getting spicy candles, lip
music playing very Rika Badou meets I'm about to risk
it all. Okay, that's how she was feeling. Now he
decides he wants to anoint her body with essential oils
to open up her sacral sacral chakra. Greeze me up,
baby'll love now. I do like that part, the greasing

(04:01):
up part. You want to be shining and glistening in
that midnight. Not well, no, not baby oil, but just
some sort of body oil. I like a good rose oil.
It makes me feel like a lady. Baby oil, I
feel like baby poop. Oh okay, So anyway, it was
cute until he grabbed the wrong bottle. So instead of

(04:23):
lavender or coconut oil, he grabbed straight up peppermint oil.
Now that is I don't want no mince going on
my body down below, No tea tree, no nothing that
might stinger have that little burn. Anyway, he drizzles it
right down her inner thighs, like it Popeye's sweet hot
sweet heat hot sauce. Within seconds, she said her Hello

(04:45):
Kitty felt like a York peppermint patty. I love patties,
but do you want CHEROCOUTI catm hm yeah. So it
was feeling like that, but in a microwave, so I
could only imagine like the intense burn. Anyway, she said,
she went from sexy moaning to speaking in full tongues,
and he had the nerve to say, that's just the
toxins leaving your body. Of course, if you don't get

(05:06):
your toxic gass up out of my hat, sir, the toxins.
My girl was doing the holy go scoot across the
bed trying to stop the burn. She ended up sitting
on a bag of frozen piece calling and she says
she was calling poison control, but I know she was
being a little dramatic as we all can be, calling
poison control because her she thought her labia was going
to evaporate. I have been in a situation where something hurt.

(05:31):
It didn't burn, but it hurts so bad mm hmm,
and it's just like you don't even know what's happening.
It's a brand new sensation and you were just like,
what the do I do you want to call nine one.
I don't ever call nine one one.

Speaker 3 (05:41):
I'm just like, if you're just laying on the bed
naked with your legs opening.

Speaker 1 (05:45):
Trying to fan, trying to put a little ice down there,
like just you come from what do I do? And
then you're so shame Like there's been several times where
I was almost a weird sex story myself. Anyway, the
relationship did not continue, but her sinuces were clearer than
ever after all of that. Oh maybe it did work,

(06:06):
work for what just for her sinuss, but that's not
what he was there for. He was not supposed to
be there fixing the sinuss anyway. Thank y'all for seeing
it in the Weird sex Stories. A couple of y'all
have been sending me stuff, and some of y'all really
been going through it, and I appreciate you for sharing
them with me so that I can share them on
the show. Keep them coming, just DM them to me
or email them to me my Instagram and email is

(06:29):
in the description box of this episode.

Speaker 3 (06:31):
I think that's so dope that that our listeners will
send us stuff. And sometimes like it feels like I
know y'all, like you know what I mean, especially the
people you communicate with kind of on a regular basis,
for a regular basis, but I still be feeling bad
when someone's like, we'll be talking to dms.

Speaker 1 (06:48):
I'd be like, oh, you know what, because you can't see,
like you don't really know what you're talking to all
the time, and I don't. I've noticed that a lot
of people will go to people's profiles and like, look
at the whole profile, and it said, I don't do that.
I just see the name and I remember the name,
but I might not even pay attention to the picture.
And we're just chatting, yeah, and it's like, well, girl,

(07:08):
send me another DM, so what's your username? And then
it'll jog my memory over a picture. Sorry y'all. Speaking
of just chatting.

Speaker 3 (07:16):
I think this was last week when I shared that
I might be getting a little kitten, and I got
so many good tips from our black girls who have cats,
and they.

Speaker 1 (07:26):
Were like what they say.

Speaker 3 (07:28):
People were like, Okay, I'm black and I got a cat,
and I don't let the cat on the counter. Some
people do let the cat on the counter, but most
people were.

Speaker 1 (07:33):
Like, I whooped the cat.

Speaker 3 (07:36):
More girls like if you got to teach the cat
dominance because cats will come into your life and they
think that they own the house.

Speaker 1 (07:42):
So you got to hold the cat down to the floor.

Speaker 3 (07:44):
Because I was it's a whole voice, and I said,
I appreciate you, says she was telling me all the things.
She's like, I hated cats, but my wife wanted a cat,
so we got two cats.

Speaker 1 (07:52):
And I was like, ooh, I hain't get in too.

Speaker 3 (07:54):
And she said. The way that you keep them off
the counter is she was like, from the jump, when
you get them, put tape upside down on every countertop.
She was like, now it will traumatize them. The first
time they do it, they're traumatized. She's like, and keep
it up there for like a week. I ain't never
gonna do it again. And I was like really, And
then I told another friend that she's like, don't do
It's gonna tumatize the cat. And I say, I'm gonna
have to traumatize the cat. Don't get up on these counters.

(08:17):
But I got some good black Mama cat advice from
the girls that have cats, and I was like.

Speaker 1 (08:22):
Do people still eat your food?

Speaker 2 (08:24):
You know?

Speaker 3 (08:24):
I was, and I really was asking the real question
they say one of the I don't actually know if
I got answers, but I was like, do you does
the does your apartment stink? Does your house stink? And
I'm not trying to be funny, I just really want
to know. So everyone was like, if you get the
normal kiddy litter box, your house is gonna stink. If
you get the upgraded one, it's like two hundred dollars

(08:45):
and it's an automatic cleaner.

Speaker 1 (08:46):
It's real, not static kind.

Speaker 3 (08:48):
And then one girl was like, well, if you put
you're gonna have to get a little pad because when
they're in there, it still gets on their I don't
know if I can do it, Like, I'm still kind
of I want something, Kiki. I am so lonely. I
need a little animal. I thought about getting a guinea
pig and I was like.

Speaker 1 (09:05):
Ah ah, a big old fat rat, a little, big
old fat rat.

Speaker 3 (09:08):
And then I almost got a bunny rabbit, and then
I was like, what the hell. I went to a
jeweler and he and next door to him was this
man was selling bunnies and I was like, I almost
left with my life is absolutely wrong.

Speaker 1 (09:23):
Random things that you're at a jeweler and randomly somebody
is selling bunnies and you're about a pet, and she's like,
this might be a good idea.

Speaker 3 (09:33):
Because I missshot. I didn't think he was gonna be
like I really am. Like, codependency is real, but there's
like a piece of it that I just need, Like, yes,
I'm not gonna be dependent on a man, but like
an animal.

Speaker 1 (09:43):
Absolutely, I would love to. But I don't think Whitley.

Speaker 3 (09:46):
Really told me like that.

Speaker 2 (09:47):
Really.

Speaker 1 (09:48):
Yeah, she's always like running out in a minute.

Speaker 3 (09:51):
She might every time she ain't seen me in a minute,
she kind of does her little light prands and then
she'd be like.

Speaker 1 (09:55):
Honestly, I think that my girl. She's a little prejudiced,
but not against women. She loves us, so.

Speaker 3 (10:02):
Prejudiced again others, Okay, okay, it's just a flirt.

Speaker 1 (10:06):
Well, she's mad at me right now because I left
her at home and she was looking at me with
her head cocked to the side. But I'm like, girl,
sometimes you're gonna have to stay here. You're a big girl.
Now you'd be barking at me and trying to get
buck like a teenager. So you want to be grown.
Be grown. I'm not taking it down to mister Jay's house.
You're gonna have to stay here by yourself. But I'd
be worried about her. And I check the pet cube

(10:27):
like every twenty minutes. Sometimes That's what I'm doing on life.

Speaker 3 (10:30):
I know I need I need a little love.

Speaker 1 (10:35):
But what have you been up to? So? I just
recently got back from Texas. I went out there. I
did not go for Thanksgiving. I stayed here and I
had a really good time. I'm glad I stayed. I
was nervous, like a couple of days before Thanksgiving, like
I'm not gonna regret this because I wasn't gonna be
with my family. It was the right decision. I went

(10:56):
to a friendsgiving. I went to a friendsgiving. I mean,
I've been seeing them every other week. It's not like
I hadn't just left town. But I went to a
friends giving at lexus house. Beautiful home, isn't it?

Speaker 3 (11:09):
Beautiful?

Speaker 1 (11:09):
Beautiful home? I picked it, mm hmm. We had a
fabulous time over there. Gracious host. She gave us gifts
and I was like, oh, this is nice, hot sauces
and things, and there was a candle something about she
has like a scent in her home. While the candles

(11:30):
are the same sense. So she gave us like a
little baby one, and I was like, Oh, that's a
cute touch. I like that, very classy, very classy.

Speaker 3 (11:36):
I don't know what she didn't put it in her
own little bottle or like the company that makes the
candle makes many ones.

Speaker 1 (11:43):
I think the company makes many ones. I don't think
she was doing that because she was still doing other decorations.
But she was already starting her Christmas decoration. She had
a nutcracker, a giant nutcracker. He was bigger than me
in there, but she said she was painting him black.
He was just all white, but she was gonna pay
him black after thanks. So I can't wait till you
ask if you have seen what that home looked like.

(12:05):
I saw some photos and videos. It's so different. It's
a different place.

Speaker 3 (12:10):
It's so different. It's a different place. I and I
hadn't seen it before I went out of town. I
stopped over Lex's place to give.

Speaker 1 (12:16):
Her a gift, she tells me, and where was mine?

Speaker 3 (12:20):
Well, see, here's what happened to me and my dad
are learning how to do this. My dad sent me
seven pies. You were gonna get one, but I'm so
glad he sent extra because as the professional, you know,
my dad was a chef, he was like, some of
these might get messed up and I would hit and
that's exactly what happened. And I didn't want to give
anybody a messed up, especially you. So you talk about
me on YouTube and then I'd be like, you know what,
my daddy made the pie. Anyways I gave. I went

(12:42):
over there to deliver a pie and I was like,
oh my gosh, this home is transformed.

Speaker 1 (12:48):
Like I was just like, you're an adult, a real adult,
because I said I was going to do some of
those decorative things and I still haven't. And I've been
in my place for a long time. I went to
that guest retreat, not a guest room, but a retreat.
I was like, girl, don't be mad when I come knocking,
said the thing. Okay, it's a very it's luxurious. I

(13:10):
at first I thought I was walking into her room.
Had I not seen an Instagram preview. And then when
I walked into her room, which is the size of
my entire apartment, I was like, God, damn, bitch, there's
a square feed in here. I am very rich. So
that's just what I kept saying it. I was walking
around and I was like, well, what don't you have?
Because when I went to your registry, everything was bought
except for like one base, and I was like, I

(13:32):
ain't getting in a damn base. I was. I got
her an ice maker, but the ice maker accidentally shifted
to me and it was used, so I've got to
redo it. And I was like, oh, hell no, you
need a good ice maker anyway, so maybe for Christmas
you'll have it.

Speaker 3 (13:47):
Speaking of ice makers that you got, because y'all, Kickie
got me an icemaker for my birthday?

Speaker 1 (13:50):
Did you use your head massage gift card that I got?
I have booked my appointment, okay, I need it before
I go to Jamaica, so I pase use it? Yes,
I us and tell that was next time we record,
I should be able to give the recap because I
am going Friday morning, okay. And I can't wait to
get this scalp scrub because it needs it. It's dirty.

(14:11):
It's a dirty sandstorm up under this spot. We're in
different seats and I just feel really weird, dude. I mean,
I got my butt in. I didn't know we're going
to be in different seats. My butt is not tight
and slick like yours, but it's up here, and I
hope it don't fall down and turn into tumbleweed.

Speaker 3 (14:29):
Everything we switched because okay, I just want well, I
wanted us to not say that were I love to
see if the listeners noticed, but they do, they probably do.
I wanted to see if it brought a different energy,
but also I wanted to see if they noticed. I
just wanted to see, like you and then, how many
people actually watch the episode.

Speaker 1 (14:49):
Is well, it's been fifteen minutes. They should have noticed
by now. If you didn't notice, chime in below. If
you did notice, I hope you already chimed in, like,
what the hell's going on with the hell? Speaking of
broken pies, I brought Sandra a sweet potato pie, a
homemade yes, okay, not no patty pie. This was a

(15:10):
kiky pie patty pie. And I brought my pie over
to lexus. Now, I know the bitch has been trying
to be fine, but I'm like, just today, can y'all
big back it up with me? Please? Yes? We did,
but they were taking skinny pieces and I was just like,
y'all really committed that's so beautiful to see, but it's
not even real. Thanks give it just dump anyway, bring

(15:31):
the pie. So I went to Texas the weekend after Thanksgiving.
I went Friday to Tuesday, I think, and she was
having a gender reveal over the weekend. I'm excited. It's
a girl. I was right.

Speaker 3 (15:46):
Did they do a normal gender reveal or was it
like one of them crazy ones where it's like the
forest might catch on fire the force.

Speaker 1 (15:51):
No, it was, but it wasn't theme, and it was
like a rodeo theme. So it's like, are they having
a cowboy or a cowgirl. I got to wear one
of my backup outfits from Cowboy Carter. Everybody was dressed up.
It was a good time, and they know how to party.
They know how to have a good time for everybody.
They had a bunch of stuff for the kids. And
then after alcohol there of course there was. There was

(16:14):
a bar and a bartender and she had they had
signature drinks. Of course she could make a few little things.
They bought way too much alcohol. I helped them with
drinking it, but I didn't drink at all. And then
me and a couple of the girls and most of
the guys. We went out afterwards, and I was like,
Xandra Siah, I'll see y'all in the morning because y'all

(16:36):
are the mamas, and I gotta go out with the
same MoMA and your husband. So we're all gonna go
out and have a good time tonight. I didn't want
to go to sleep, but I brought my sweet potato
pie there and I carried it with me on the plane.

Speaker 3 (16:49):
Oh, we are really adults, and traveled with it. My
exes calling me, I know.

Speaker 1 (16:56):
You fucking line. Okay, well, jingle bells.

Speaker 3 (17:02):
Bell jingle all the way away from me.

Speaker 1 (17:08):
Anyways, I ordered a traveling thing because I need to
build up my traveling stuff for food things because I
and I was just like, oh I found these few things,
cancel my order. I was upset Amazon. Anyway. I just
had to take it old school with foil and put
it in like a harder pie pan and TSA. Yeah,

(17:32):
it's not a problem because it's solid.

Speaker 3 (17:33):
Okay, so FYI, you.

Speaker 1 (17:35):
Can bring your food. I used to bring my turkey
leg hut back from Houston when I was going up
there every day. But yeah, you can bring food through there.
It's the liquids anyway, some of the crust got a
little jammed, and then my girl Margo, their baby girl
that they already have, she's trying to help and little

(17:57):
ditch in the foil castal and I was just like,
So then somebody sits it out with the rest of
the desserts, and I was just like, who did this?
This looks awful. So I had to improvise. So I
made a deconstructed sweet potato pie with a scoop of
Bluebel ice cream on it, and I just had to
pass it out. So when your pies travel and they

(18:17):
come out fucked up, all you gotta do is cut it.
So I cut it into squares. We had the little
clear dessert cups, so I just took with gloves, took
the little pieces. I cut it into tiny squares and
so it's just like little cubes of pie and then
a small scoop of ice cream with a small little spood.
And I made them eat it, especially the men. That

(18:37):
is very cute, and they loved it and it turned
out great. I hate that they didn't just get to
get a whole pie, but there was so much food.

Speaker 3 (18:45):
I love that, you know, that's how it was supposed
to be. Her in the holiday, speaking of just one
more pie story.

Speaker 1 (18:49):
So I love me some pie. I love pie.

Speaker 3 (18:52):
I love pie.

Speaker 1 (18:53):
My favorite is apple pie.

Speaker 3 (18:55):
I and my dad makes the best apple potatoes mine.
Oh it's just like, oh my god, it's so good. Okay,
So I ever came up with that eight I can't
make pie. One time I tried to make pie and
I was I was traumatized by how my dad laughed
at me and it was really bad, and so I
just never made it again. But my dad makes everything

(19:15):
really well, and so he shipped me one bean pie
that I was going to give to Lex. But my
dad is such a perfections. He was like, if you
were going to make content out of this, this is
not my best pie.

Speaker 1 (19:27):
And I was like, he was really pies and it
was literally I was like, okay, I feel him.

Speaker 3 (19:34):
So he made me honey a mixture of honeycare pies
and then one bean pie. So I delivered. I made
these very cute little labels. I gotta get better with them.
I'm really even better with can cricket. No. I made
it on canva and then I kind of asked Chajibti
to clean it up for me. And then I added
my logo on it, and then they just ordered it,
and then I ordered it and it was stickers and

(19:55):
I my dad sent me containers and then I put
the sticker on the container and had a mess to
each of my clients their name and then a special
message like thank you for choosing me with one of
the biggest decisions you might have, most expensive decisions you
might ever make in life. And so I spent a
day delivering, hand delivering the pie. So first off was
lex second stop was another one of my clients, and

(20:17):
it was just such a good hands on touch because
people were really like, first of all, people love pie.
Second of all, it was just a surprise. And then
third of all, I went to one of my clients
who is in a very nice building in Atlanta, and
I go I talked to the concierge and I'm like,
if she's here, I'm gonna run up in surprise her

(20:38):
with it. If she's not here, I'm gonna leave this
here with you because I'm going out of town and
this is my day to deliver pies. And I had
on my little cute amige girl dress. Well he I
was looking really and I was walking around.

Speaker 1 (20:48):
That it was so cute.

Speaker 3 (20:49):
So I'm going to She's like, oh, she's here. So
I was like, can you buzz me up on the elevator.
So I go to the elevator and this man walks
out of the elevator.

Speaker 1 (20:56):
He's tall.

Speaker 3 (20:56):
I don't tawim in no more fine perfectly cover all
his teeth and i'd be get nerurves by them side teeth.
So I but I saw him and he saw me,
and there was like this energy that like we fell.
And I was like, I'm a lady now. And so
I get in the elevator. He's still looking at me,
and I'm looking at him like you're gonna say something,
but I didn't say that. And he dips back and
he's like I think he dropped something. I didn't drop anything.

(21:19):
And I was like he had to come up with
he had to come with him. He's smiling. He was
extremely tall, and he was like what's your day? When
the door is closing, it's like a movie and I'm
like Medina and then he and then the door closes
and I go up to the top floor.

Speaker 1 (21:33):
I get off and I'm like it.

Speaker 3 (21:36):
Was really fine. I go I'm like, maya take the
pie I'm so sorry. I was gonna stay and catch
up with you have your Thanksgiving. It is the honeycare
pie ingredients is on the label. I gotta go, and
she was like, why are you going? I was like,
it was a fine man downstairs and I gotta go.
She's like, go, I go downstairs. I go downstairs, y'all.

Speaker 1 (21:53):
I'm like, push the elevator.

Speaker 3 (21:55):
It's like on like the fortieth floor. So I'm like wait,
I'm like, come on, you elevan. This lady's like, were
you living pies?

Speaker 1 (22:00):
I'd like to order one.

Speaker 3 (22:01):
I was like, ma'am, I'm trying to meet a man.

Speaker 1 (22:03):
Okay, I go downstairs for your damn pie. Girl.

Speaker 3 (22:06):
The elevator opens and I go to I'm like, of
course he was waiting on me. Of course he wasn't.
And I was like, man, and then the concierge comes out.
I'm walking out the door. She's like, excuse me, can
you wait here real quick? And I was like, I
thought she was gonna say something how I had parked well.

Speaker 1 (22:21):
I'm thinking she gonna say something about the man. He
left a message, and he did.

Speaker 3 (22:24):
I didn't think that. I was like, damn, probably gonna
get it, take it, and so girl, she came back out.
She was like, did you see that man? I was like,
the tall, fine one and she was like yeah. She
was like he asked me to ask you could you
call him? And I was like like right now, and
she was like, he wanted me to give you his number.
I was like, what's his name? She told me his name?
This is his name, but everybody calls him this. I said, well,
wait a minute, does he have a wife that.

Speaker 1 (22:48):
Looks like it?

Speaker 3 (22:49):
And she was like because I said, everybody has to
check in it through. She was like yeah. I said, okay,
does he She's like no? And I said does he
have a girlfriend and she was like no. I said
does he have a lot of traffic coming in and
out here? She said he doesn't.

Speaker 1 (23:01):
And I was like, did he pay you to tell
me this?

Speaker 2 (23:03):
Right?

Speaker 3 (23:03):
I said, because if he does, I don't need his number.
I'm not even about to play. And I was like,
you see this necklace, like, don't play with me. I'm
trying to be healed and he'll healer.

Speaker 1 (23:11):
Oh I can't see it, okay, And so she.

Speaker 3 (23:13):
Was like no, and I saw she gives me his
number and I walk outside of it. I call him
right away. He didn't pick up. I called him again and.

Speaker 1 (23:21):
Wait a minute. Now, wait a minute.

Speaker 3 (23:24):
He picks up. He's like hey, and I was like,
this is Medina. He was like, oh, I know, and
I was like hi. And he was like, come across
the street and have lunch with me. And I was
like I can' I'm delivering pies. He was like, are
you a baker? And I was like no, I'm Marilla
estate agent and I'm delivering my client's pies. Because I
wanted to buy more houses with me and tell the
friends to buy houses with me. He was like, you

(23:44):
want to buy house?

Speaker 1 (23:45):
I want to buy some.

Speaker 3 (23:46):
I said, I got a goal by the airport and
deliver one. And so I was like, I'm not done
with my deliveries yet. And he said I would love
to take you on a date. And I said, well,
can you read?

Speaker 1 (23:57):
He probably read your name when you called. I'm there.

Speaker 3 (24:01):
Yeah, I said, do you read books? He said, I
don't like reading books. I said, well, how about this
a lot of people don't like reading books.

Speaker 1 (24:07):
He said, I don't like reading books.

Speaker 3 (24:09):
And then I hear him like taking pictures with people,
and I'm like, what's happening. He's like he's and I
was like, he's not an athlete. But I was like,
what's happening? And he was like, I got to take
pictures with these people. He's liked, just come up here.

Speaker 1 (24:22):
I didn't call him. Does he ever bought it?

Speaker 3 (24:25):
I can't remember, but he goes.

Speaker 1 (24:29):
So I said, well, how about this.

Speaker 3 (24:30):
We were talking on the phone while I was going
to my next delivery. It was such good vibes and goody.
We were cracking jokes. I'm cracking jokes. He was like,
can I tell you something before we get off the phone.
I said yeah. He said I was really attracted to
how you were so covered up, and he was like,
I had an Almast dress on. I have that Amage
dress on it.

Speaker 1 (24:47):
I need to see the Amist stress because when I
picture Homage, I know you was not walking around like
what I'm picture.

Speaker 3 (24:52):
It's like a little It's funny because when if y'all
watched the episode of me on Jesse Woo's podcast, I
wore the dress and she was like, why do you
have this may dress on? And I was like, cause
because I don't I like the dress, and so he
was like he was like It's really weird because you
always hear people saying, like, you know, like, don't show
the man everything, and he was like, I can't. He
was like, I really saw your coverage from your neck

(25:14):
to your ankles, and I was like yeah. And so anyways,
he was really great, Our first date is going to
be us going to the library and I'm going to
read to him and it'll be interesting and we'll see
how this goes. But it was so much. It was
just fun and refreshing the way that we met. And
he told me, he said, I said, well, why didn't
you just like ask for my phone over He was like, well,

(25:35):
I know that I'm really large, and I didn't want to, like,
I don't want you to be scared. Yeah, he was like,
I just know that sometimes men be doing too much
with women. And I didn't want to get on the elevator.
And then it was just like, now it's awkward because
this big just got on the elevator with you to get
your number. Now we gotta ride up together and you.

Speaker 1 (25:49):
See where I'm going. I said, I appreciate that.

Speaker 3 (25:51):
Yeah, he said, but I did ask the concierge where
you going to see a man? And I said, and
I asked were you married.

Speaker 1 (25:56):
And what he said?

Speaker 3 (25:56):
He was like, I'm not married, but like I do,
got like a little situation, but I'm boat to cut
it off. And I was like, but the situation like
your girlfriend. He was like, it's not my girlfriend, but like,
you know, I just been talking to somebody and I
was like, we're probably not gonna talk. But it was
really cool. He was really cool and he'll probably be
a great friend. I don't like tall men.

Speaker 1 (26:12):
What it's too much. They have major down a short
build up the short average king. Yeah, because the tall men,
it's like short or average, because that's different, a little
bit of both.

Speaker 3 (26:25):
I want a little bit of both.

Speaker 1 (26:26):
Like you want two different ones or what is.

Speaker 3 (26:30):
This next dating phase for me? Like I can do
a little bit of both. Like if you're average, cool,
if you're if you're short, not shorter than me, but
like as long, like because if.

Speaker 1 (26:40):
I fixture short, I would say shorter than you.

Speaker 3 (26:42):
I'm thinking like five nine. I'm fine.

Speaker 1 (26:44):
Women think that's short, Okay, that is what I would
put more so on the upper end, like average almost tall,
not quite.

Speaker 3 (26:52):
The point that I'm saying is hype really don't matter.
But if you're tall, I said, both, I'm good. They
it's just they have too much attention. And there's this
book that I read and it talked about tall men specifically,
and how uh, how you talked about hippie women and
tall men and how naturally you're in your psyche. They
get a lot of attention because people want to breed

(27:13):
with them because you have good you have good genes.
And I was like, I'm not dealing with this. You
remember six say Bay, Nope, I'm good. I learned my lessons. Nope.
And I told him that you like what And I
was like, yep, nope.

Speaker 1 (27:30):
So what do you do on a library day?

Speaker 3 (27:32):
So this is what we're gonna do. I've never done
it before. We're gonna There are five black owned libraries
in Atlanta. They all look really cool. They've been going
around Instagram lately. They look really cool. One of them
has a bar.

Speaker 1 (27:40):
Black owned libraries or bookstores, bookstores store bookstores Okay, And
there's one called the Vibrary that I really want to
go to a little bar in it. Have you been, No,
I haven't been. In my lists. It's so I want
to do like a book club thing there.

Speaker 3 (27:55):
You it's so it's just one mountain. That's why, Yecause
I'm like, I'm gonna go though, So I already know
what book I'm gonna read to him and I'm gonna
He was like, this is actually gonna be really sexy,
and I was like, I know it is.

Speaker 1 (28:11):
And then he'll get a book.

Speaker 3 (28:12):
Like we'll both pick books out and then like we'll
read them to each other.

Speaker 1 (28:15):
And I really do want to see.

Speaker 3 (28:17):
Like can you read? How do you read? I'm just
focusing on different things this time.

Speaker 1 (28:22):
Well, shout out to that, and that's wrong with trying
something new and different. I've never done a library day,
but that's interesting. I do ask though about reading. Do
you read? What kind of books do you read?

Speaker 2 (28:32):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (28:32):
What do you like? What do you do in your
free time that doesn't involve going out? Like in your
time when you're alone at home or even when you're
just alone and you're going somewhere. Is everything a restaurant,
a bar, a club or party or something super social?

Speaker 3 (28:51):
And with you saying that, I want to be clear
on this cause I feel like sometimes people love to
take things the wrong way. I feel the same way
as you, like, what are you doing your free and
there are certain things that just won't mix with me now.
And it's not a judgment though, it's just like a preference,
and that's okay, y'all. Like I sometimes I feel like
people feel so attacked, like, well, I do it, continue

(29:12):
to do it.

Speaker 1 (29:12):
It's not a match. I feel like everybody, like when
I'm talking about what I want for my life and
what I'm attracted to or I'm unattracted by, it's like,
these are my specific preferences. If you like it, go
for it. I won't even say if you like it,
I love it, because I probably don't. Sometimes it's fine,

(29:33):
but sometimes I'm just like, what the hell? Yeah, I
don't know, but yeah, I like to ask those questions.
And it's not always like an end all be all,
but I think that those are things that help you
better understand people and you'll get a little bit deeper
with them than like some of the more basic things

(29:53):
exact people ask or Like I can't tell you how
many times I've been out somewhere and people just talking
about going out, even when I'm out of town. Like
I was talking to this guy. I don't even know
who he was, but he was at the baby shower
and we were chit chatting and he was talking to
me about going out in Atlanta and what it's like,
and it wasn't like a flirtatious thing. We were just

(30:14):
having a conversation waiting for our drinks. And I was
just like, I know, I live in Atlanta, and I
know too many it's sodom and gomora, but it's also like, hey,
there's more to do here. And then when I was
on a plane one time, I met a couple. They
lived somewhere very far south Peachtree something p Stree Corners.

(30:37):
Which one is north and which one is south. There's
like Peachtree City and Peachtree Corners.

Speaker 3 (30:41):
I think Peachtree Cities is south and pre.

Speaker 1 (30:45):
Peachtree City is where they were. And they were like,
where do you live? I said Buckheat and they were like, ooh,
the ghetto. And I was like, well, okay, let's back up.
I did get robbed at gun point, well you did.
But I was like, there, Buckheat is pretty big. And
I think when people think about Buckheat, they think about
where the shopping is, Yes, but there's so many other areas.
And I saw girl on Threads the other day and

(31:05):
she was talking about and she was like Limberg, Phipps,
Linux and all the places where there's a ton of apartments,
that's not all that there is to Buckhead. There's plenty
of homes and all of that. Rudy poot isn't going
on anyway, Ruty too too, Rump pump pump, you know,
that's all what. I don't know nothing that starts with

(31:28):
I do like rum a pump pump.

Speaker 3 (31:29):
Little Glosses come in to town, and.

Speaker 1 (31:31):
I like the Little Drummer Boy.

Speaker 3 (31:33):
I love them.

Speaker 1 (31:34):
Little Drummer Boy is my favorite. I don't care who
performs it. But anyway, I forgot what was saying. People
are always talking about like all of these bad experiences here,
and I'm like, there are a ship ton don't get
me wrong, but everything isn't bad. And I always tell
people who have heard negative things, I'm like, at the
end of the day, I always say this, I have

(31:56):
lived here longer than I've lived anywhere in my entire life,
and this is what is home to me. Now. We're
not gonna get disrespectful now, because if I started talking
about Mississippi and Alabama, y'all at Florida, y'all be getting
so mad, like we're not all watching the same news.

Speaker 3 (32:10):
Well, I just want to say, when I was driving
to Oklahoma City and we went through Mississippi and was
gonna stop and get guess, I said, no, no, no,
I always drives.

Speaker 1 (32:18):
Sippy and I ain't drove through there, and we fill
up before you fill up in Alabama or you fill
up in Louisiana, we gonna make it over that bridge.

Speaker 3 (32:26):
Get your big there, because now you're.

Speaker 1 (32:29):
A lot. It's just like ghosts and bad vibes up
in there. I just don't feel safe. I will say that.

Speaker 3 (32:35):
So bucket ghetto okay, cool, But I still do like
where I live. But also I've been spending more time
on the South Side and on the west west Side,
just like exploring a little now.

Speaker 1 (32:44):
The West side I love. There are some people ship
on that too, and I love it's in the east side.
Sometimes I'm like people were saying, oh, it's skeattoed. I'm
just like, well, am I just acclimated to certain things
that you're like, what's getto what pisses me off?

Speaker 3 (33:01):
It'd be black And that's part in real estate.

Speaker 1 (33:04):
Now, I really see like people.

Speaker 3 (33:08):
People have a lot of bad things to say about Cascade,
and then it kind of started rubbing off. There's there
are mansions on Cascade.

Speaker 1 (33:15):
I went to a few parties over there and I
was like, who y'all living good?

Speaker 3 (33:19):
And I've been educating new buyers because everybody wants to be,
you know, over here on the north side, when first
of all, quite frankly, your approval letter is not saying
that's where you're gonna be.

Speaker 1 (33:30):
Yeah, get to the point because you gotta start putting people.

Speaker 3 (33:32):
It's like, you think you want to be over here,
this is where you're gonna be. Like I don't really
know what you're saying, So you're not gonna be buying
and stop calling me, and you're not gonna be buying
your south qualmy. But what I've been doing is like
educating people, Like when people say they want to build
wealth through real estate, that doesn't mean you're just buying
a house, like what I mean, because you could buy
a place in Buckhead, but you're not really building with that.

(33:56):
But if you go over to the south side, you
go over to the west side, like you might have
to wait for the neighborhood to be built, but that's
building well, and you.

Speaker 1 (34:03):
Know what I mean.

Speaker 3 (34:04):
And it's like I've been spending so much time with it.
I went to a My thing is coffee shops, y'all.
I love coffee shop.

Speaker 1 (34:10):
When the coffee shops start popping up a lot and
they last good.

Speaker 3 (34:14):
Time, I love a good like nook coffee shop. And
there was a place I was showing a home over
off your Cascade the other day, and I said I
had some work to get done. I was like, let
me find a coffee shop. It's called Cafe Bartie.

Speaker 1 (34:26):
Yes have you been? Yes? I was. It's so cute,
so key.

Speaker 3 (34:30):
But not only was it cute, I and there's a
guy that I like, and I don't have time to
hang out, so I was like, you want to come
here and just work, like, bring your computer. I can't
really be talking and like doing stuff.

Speaker 1 (34:38):
He was like, you want to be by me?

Speaker 3 (34:39):
And I also kind of want that's another way to
test somebody. I just want to see can you do it?

Speaker 1 (34:43):
Like? And he did? Yeah he did.

Speaker 3 (34:45):
And I was like, I'm not gonna lie like I
really am working, so it's not don't even sit next
to me like say the cross like at the other table.
Oh okay, So I needed to focus.

Speaker 1 (34:53):
But I wanted to see each other, not even smart.
I just wanted to look up and you really can't.

Speaker 3 (34:59):
So so I was sitting there and I went.

Speaker 1 (35:02):
To talk to them. That is funny. I'm sorry, but
I feel you.

Speaker 3 (35:08):
So I go to talk to the girl and I
was looking at like the things that were posted with activities.
They had a survival kit packing class. I thought that
was so dope. I've been wanting to do that. Like,
what do you need in your house to survive if
the fucking zombies come?

Speaker 1 (35:20):
Do you have a Costco member ship? No?

Speaker 3 (35:22):
But I think I'm about to get one.

Speaker 1 (35:23):
I have one. You want to go one day? Yeah, okay,
can you add me on it? I don't know if
I can add anybody else. Me and Sean share it,
but we can go together. And you just okay, I
need to get a couple of k's because they have
all this stuff. She did. She didn't do the class,
but she got all that survival I was like, they
talk about all these things you did.

Speaker 3 (35:41):
I'm like, I got a bottle of Persepco in one blanket,
Like what we How am I gonna be? Okay, It's
just like you need to have you need to have
a gallon of water per person that's in the house,
I mean three gallons. You need to have a generator.
You need to have any towels, like extra towels that
you don't use, extra blankets that you just don't, not
that you're like you're pulling, you just don't. These are
extra you need to have.

Speaker 1 (36:02):
Kids can like enough? Did they tell you the.

Speaker 3 (36:05):
Straw I don't.

Speaker 1 (36:06):
I had some of these things, but I don't left
him at No. But did they tell you about them?
The life straws?

Speaker 3 (36:11):
It's all these things, and it's just like, wow, you
really you need to be prepared and so flashlights, like
you know what I mean. It's like if you really
do even if you have a man, if you don't
have a man, you need is your man prepared? And
if he's not, that's so unattractive. Anyways, I'm not trying
to start an argument. Second of all, So that was
one of the evings.

Speaker 1 (36:29):
Because what we're gonna do, Luther mounom, what are we doing?
So if your name is Earl, you better have that
fucking kit and some gasolina ready to go to fire
up your pickup. I'm not gonna lie.

Speaker 3 (36:45):
I have met like men who have money where like
that type of stuff. They don't have into me.

Speaker 1 (36:49):
It's like they're just like, oh, it's always I can
pay somebody to do X y Z. Another fuck you
can't is Doomsday. I didn't what's that show with the
zombies Walking Dead? Yeah, I didn't watch that ship, but
I watched Walking Deck watch a few episodes. I watched
to check out your Obooh, and that was as far

(37:12):
as it went. I was just like I went to
IMDb to see which episodes and I was like, I'll
just watch this.

Speaker 3 (37:17):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (37:19):
I couldn't get into it. But that was many many
moons ago, and now I'm totally into the end of
the World, the aliens, everything. I have been on a
deep dive on tiptop, but really quick.

Speaker 3 (37:29):
Cafe Bartik, they had another event. She said, we have
a girl that comes in. She teaches Spanish. However, she
is speed dating and the Spanish that she's teaching is
so you can talk to each other, but you have
to talk in Spanish.

Speaker 1 (37:40):
I said, oh, why is that. I was just I'm
gonna look at the website.

Speaker 3 (37:43):
She was, I don't remember what day it is, but
she was like, go to the webs, go to the Instagbrary.
It's Cafe Bartis. Oh no, no, no, this is off of
Cascade A girl. I was there for like four hours,
just getting shit done. It was such a vibe.

Speaker 1 (37:56):
I loved it.

Speaker 3 (37:57):
I don't know what brought us here to this conversation,
but I.

Speaker 1 (38:00):
Was asking about your library date, and we were just
talking about trying different things and learning about people. Not
the same on what's your favorite color? Learn about people?

Speaker 3 (38:08):
And if you're still on what's the favorite color?

Speaker 1 (38:10):
Cool, but like go a little deeper mmmm hmm, nothing
wrong with that. I challenge y'all to do that. Like
think about our Patreon lives when we've talked to different
people and they tell us about their dating woes, and
it was like almost every single time we asked them
more questions like, well, what did y'all talk about before?

(38:31):
What was this? It was like crickets. So sometimes if
you think you're having a hard time connecting with somebody,
or you feel like somebody doesn't know you, will you
don't know them well, or y'all are just doing the
same old things, maybe you challenge yourself to initiate conversation
talking about different things that aren't like where your next
date will be just like your life. Your life.

Speaker 3 (38:54):
And it's interesting that we're talking about this because this
had nothing to do with the topic. But I went
on You Werene's show that I I can't remember when,
but the episode came out last week. I can't remember
the name of the show because I just can't. I'm sorry, y'all,
but she we there was a clip. I'm gonna play
a piece of it because I thought this was really

(39:14):
interesting to hear what some of the people had to
say about communication, and we're going to read some of
the comments, just like some of the people have to.

Speaker 1 (39:21):
Say, you got a little poot, No, that was my phone.
You did just poop. So it would be funky, let
me tell you, I had a lot of broccoli. That's good.

Speaker 3 (39:30):
Though when people's first be funky, there's a difference in
the funk. It's like really unhealthy funk, like trash, and
there's like a.

Speaker 1 (39:37):
That would be so nasty and so rude. I would
not do, y'all. I would have abruptly gotten up and
went out.

Speaker 3 (39:43):
Okay, so y'all listen to this really quick, and then
I'm going to read you with several men and women
had to say about this and I thought it was
very interesting. Okay, okay, it's been a little over a
year I've been going on dates with the men, and
I'm about to go back in hibernation because I'm just like, oh,
I had a man tell me that I communicate too well?

Speaker 1 (40:02):
How is that a thing?

Speaker 3 (40:03):
Like?

Speaker 1 (40:04):
Isn't that? I was like, that's good? Right?

Speaker 3 (40:06):
He was like, yeah, I just don't be communicating like that.

Speaker 1 (40:08):
And I was like, but you should. The whole point
of dating is.

Speaker 3 (40:11):
So that we get to know each other, to really
know if we want to keep creating time and.

Speaker 1 (40:18):
Space for each other. And so I'm gonna ask questions
it have to do with that. Do you like dogs? Nigga?
Do you like going outside? I asked somebody what podcasts
do you like to listen to?

Speaker 3 (40:31):
Because he said he listened to the podcasts.

Speaker 1 (40:33):
I don't know, do you what are we talking? I'm like, yeah,
now I'm irritated, Kikky.

Speaker 3 (40:40):
Those are simple questions. Would you wouldn't you agree?

Speaker 1 (40:43):
Yeah? Especially if I say, oh, I like TV shows?
Well what TV shows you like?

Speaker 3 (40:47):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (40:48):
The fuck?

Speaker 3 (40:50):
This should really be studying. I went through and I
was like, dating is interesting because y'all, I look at
it differently. Now it's like I don't have a lot
of time, and I'm not saying that as a flag.
So if it's like we're gonna hang out together, you
want it to be worth it.

Speaker 1 (41:07):
I do.

Speaker 3 (41:07):
And like the time spent you don't get it back,
you don't get it back. And like I've literally I
have quite literally cut something out to make I never
knew that being a realistur real estate agent was like
I feel like a drug dealer. I always have to
pick up the phone if it even if it says
scam likely, I gotta pick it up because it might not. Actually,
sometimes when I call people that says scam likely, I

(41:28):
think just because I have a Muslim name, because I'm like,
why is it showing.

Speaker 1 (41:32):
Up like that?

Speaker 3 (41:33):
And so it's just like and so it's like I'm
still making space for myself. But also it's like, no
longer are the days where it's like I'm it's just
like we're just going out and it was and it
was we didn't have a good time, and I'm just
gonna keep not having it. And a good time now
means are we getting to know each other?

Speaker 1 (41:50):
Like you know what I mean, I do if you
don't like somebody who talks a lot.

Speaker 3 (41:55):
It's no judgment. I'm probably not somebody you want to
be hanging around talk And I ask questions these comments
that the specifically I'm not just ragging on the men, but.

Speaker 1 (42:06):
I was like, this is wild. There was a man.

Speaker 3 (42:17):
There was a man that.

Speaker 1 (42:18):
Said, well, you're probably moving way too fast by asking
what podcasts you like? And do you like dogs? You
like podcasts? I like dogs? Do you that's moving too fast?
What the fucking room schoost to say? You want to
have Hennessy or tequila? Is that all that's appropriate?

Speaker 3 (42:38):
Mister Q dog underscore, I t said, I think there's
a healthy line between being inquisitive and just flat out
being nosy. You're being nosy.

Speaker 1 (42:50):
I'm sorry. I had do you play the whole clip
for us?

Speaker 3 (42:55):
The clip for you?

Speaker 1 (42:57):
And you know I can go deep that's yeah, because
you could have been nosy, but that clip wasn't given
nosy at all. It's those are like baseline questions, right.

Speaker 3 (43:12):
Those are that's not even baselin, that's just like okay,
I see that.

Speaker 1 (43:15):
It's like he's a stranger and and even do you
like dogs?

Speaker 3 (43:20):
To me, that's an important question. Because I am a
dog person. I would I can't. I wouldn't be with
someone unless God just is like, this is gonna be
your man. But he's not gonna do that to me.
If you if I God was on there, like I
hate dogs, you can never have a dog. And if
you have a dog, it's only gonna be a working dog.
And he's gonna be in the yard.

Speaker 1 (43:37):
You're looking on what.

Speaker 3 (43:42):
Sixteen a shepherd dog and he's not that baby's hunger.
I'll make him a little chicken.

Speaker 1 (43:51):
I said, Okay, okay, let me this, y'all.

Speaker 3 (43:54):
Y'all, this, this isn't this isn't done, So okay. Another
another man's said women have to stop trying to and
men really be thinking. They sound like this makes sense.
Women have to start stop trying to make men act
like women.

Speaker 1 (44:13):
Y'all. I didn't say, do you cook? Do you do
your own dishes?

Speaker 3 (44:17):
Y'all?

Speaker 1 (44:18):
Plushy you use cause sometimes that's the real motherfucking question
I want to ask them.

Speaker 3 (44:22):
Y'all want men to be vulnerable mm hmm, when we
really aren't supposed to be the definition of vulnerability is
letting your guards down. No, it's not. That's not the
definition of vulnerability, y'all, we have CHATGPT put the comment
in chaggybt first and say does this make sense? Even

(44:42):
the Bible says to guard your heart at all times.
You should want a man to be transparent with you,
and when he decides to be vulnerable, protect that space
and understand that he really much trust you to do.

Speaker 1 (44:53):
So you know what? What did I say? That was?
Let me tell you something and everybody listening for everybody,
and you try to turn the volume up. Remember I've
said this before and people got mad. I'm going to
say it again, So sorry to advance if this upsets you,
but it's the God's honest truth. Remember being in school.
If you went to public school, I don't know what
they did with the others, and they had that other

(45:16):
wing of the school or maybe a trailer or like
other rooms for other students who needed additional attention, and
some people were in your regular classes with you, and
then they didn't have to go with the other kids
all the time, but every now and again they did
have to go. Remember once we left school, whether we

(45:36):
graduated or we just was done, got too old, whatever
the case may be, parents left us defend ourselves whatever happened,
we all got released into the world as adults on
our own, and we don't have to wear name tax
we don't have lanyards, we don't have IDs, we don't
have labels. When people say shit like that, I know

(45:56):
where you sat in school, I know how long your
bus was, and I know that you had lunch at
ten am. This is no shade to people who have
to go through that. But sometimes y'all be saying shit,
that's just it's not making sense. You argue about men
being vulnerable and women wanting men to be women, but
then you're talking about how you've got to protect your

(46:18):
heart and you've got to do all these things. Nobody's
asking you for your deepest, darkest secrecies or get to
know you questions that you can ask somebody, anybody in
the beginning. If it's too much for you, hey, you
need to just let people know when you try to
date that I don't really like to talk, I don't
like to share anything about me, and I would really
like for you to just let me put my pecker

(46:39):
in you when I feel like it, because that's really
where you're at.

Speaker 3 (46:42):
That's for you, mister TA one two two three said,
you'll be You're going to be single forever and just
like you, where.

Speaker 1 (46:50):
Can I get my membership card? Bitch? That's what I
would ask them, because when people started doing shit like that,
not want to be mean, and I don't want to
be mean.

Speaker 3 (46:58):
Somebody says, it's this one was really interesting to me,
the field factor. This is his name, the field Factor,
and I went, I was like, name, somebody had.

Speaker 1 (47:06):
Children with you. This is what you gotta take this
more seriously.

Speaker 3 (47:10):
This man said why you can't, why you can't just
let the vibes vibe, asking if he like dogs. Well,
the vibe was vibing and I wanted to know where
it was going, and I didn't like it.

Speaker 1 (47:23):
So now I'm talking about it.

Speaker 3 (47:25):
But I don't even always respond, but I had to
because you as as you gotta get people. I said,
letting vibes vibes isn't really my vibe. Time and space
is more than vibes at a certain point and age,
I know so many people who vibed and now they
have kids with someone you didn't want kids with.

Speaker 1 (47:44):
So let's go a little deeper than a vibe.

Speaker 3 (47:47):
King that's just my thought process. You don't have to
go by that, but.

Speaker 1 (47:52):
Going off of vibes, and I'm just like, okay when
people say that. I hear a lot of people say that,
mostly younger people, So give them a little space. You're young,
you're living in your learning, you're trying to figure it out.
Maybe you don't know how to use your words. Well
you can if you're emotionally mature and like a real

(48:12):
what I would consider a real adult. And you're talking
about vibes, I can understand what you mean. The others
I don't know. But that is a part of feeling
the vibe. Okay, I like this person. The energy feels good.
Let me find out more about you. I would like
to share more about me. I'm interested. That's the vibe
that I feel on a date where it makes me talk,

(48:34):
it makes me ask questions, it makes me just wonder
and want to know more about you. And that's dating essentially,
like you're getting to know each other. You're spending time
together and figuring out during this dating process are we aligned?
How can our lives fit together? Are they complimentary? Are
they not? Are there some Are you sparking something in me?

(48:58):
That's what I really like when you break something in me.
You ask me a question and I've never thought about that,
and maybe I don't have an answer, but at this
point in life, I'm okay with saying, you know what,
I've actually never thought about that. I don't have an answer,
but I'm gonna think about it, and when I call
you tomorrow, let's talk about it, because I really want
to think on this. Tell me your thoughts, and it's
just like you can get deeper in learn something because

(49:19):
I like learning all the time, especially from somebody that
I'm dating. I don't need you to match me. I
just need you to compliment me and sometimes supplement me
where I'm not great, and you can teach me things,
I can teach you things. We can expose each other
to other things. And people act like as if you

(49:40):
asking simple questions like you did is a problem. That's
not a problem.

Speaker 3 (49:44):
I honestly, I don't require much. I want you to
have your teeth and I want you to be yourself,
and I think to me, I'm starting to see like
I'm myself. What you see is quite literally what you get.
You gonna see weave, you gonna see not weave, you
gonna see filer, you gonn see not feeling. You go
see Megan, you go see, You're gonna see annoying. You're
gonna see talking. I'm not gonna sit down and act
like I don't talk when I talk. Somebody said, I

(50:05):
totally agree with her. This is a man, and still
I'm not even trying to drag him. But this still
makes no sense. You listen, things should go for the women.
This kind of thing should go for the women's side too.
A guy would be calling and a guy like me
would be calling in text and trying to get to
know you, and the woman won't reply back for another
three days, and when she applied back she act like

(50:29):
nothing happened.

Speaker 1 (50:30):
She doesn't like you. Lady doesn't like you. She's busy.
She didn't see it so many you're not number one
on the totem pole. I'm sorry to break it to you.
Get it over. I'm saying that's not what was being taught.

Speaker 2 (50:41):
Hey, you're not.

Speaker 1 (50:42):
Dating women, so why would you even be addressing what
women should do. You never said in the clip that
you wouldn't respond had the guy been asking you these
questions through texts, and some of y'all motherfuckers need to
pick up goddamn phone where there's a phone call regular
or FaceTime something. This is the last one.

Speaker 3 (51:00):
Promise y'all.

Speaker 1 (51:00):
This is let you could.

Speaker 3 (51:01):
There's hundreds of comments, and it's just it's a bunch
of women saying what their experience has been with communicating
with men on very basic level.

Speaker 1 (51:07):
You ask them one question. They're like, this is an interview,
and it's like, what do you want to do? Why
do you want me to be here?

Speaker 3 (51:16):
This man the cipher said, a lot of women try
to turn turn try to turn the over six foot
cool guy into the husband. So you try to force
that that fine man into being an effective communicator, an emotional,
intelligent man. Ladies, you also cannot turn a three to

(51:37):
zero four into a you know.

Speaker 1 (51:40):
M what are we? What are we? Okay? No, mm hmmm, No,
I'm confusion. I already be getting a little confused with
some of the new terms. I know what a threeho
four is. He's called the man a three O four
or the It just keeps turning back into and sometimes.

Speaker 3 (52:09):
This is another surprising conversation about the inactions of males.

Speaker 1 (52:13):
And I'm like, if this, if you're off the channel,
That's what I wanting to say to people. So I'm sorry,
let it, let it jump out. But sometimes just like,
go away from this content. You do not have to consume,
You do not have to watch. Go sit with the
rest of the in cells and enjoy talking shit about
women and jacking your dicks, because that's what you're doing.

(52:37):
Some people are really curious about where they're going wrong,
and these conversations can be helped. And I'm people, I'm like,
I want to be with the men that are confused
that can listen and just take it. Oh I did that.
I didn't realize that. And you're just sharing your experience.
Why why we gotta start named calling? That's what I'm

(52:58):
just like, Why y'all really got kids with people?

Speaker 2 (53:01):
Like?

Speaker 1 (53:01):
That's the part that I look at.

Speaker 3 (53:02):
It's like, if people just show up and be themselves,
like being yourself?

Speaker 1 (53:08):
What is the day that you like to do? Who
are you?

Speaker 3 (53:11):
Because I'm starting to realize you just get with people
in everybody And I'm saying this too, like I'm trying
it a different way. Who are you?

Speaker 1 (53:19):
You know what I mean? Yeah, I do, it's important.
I don't know who I was talking to. I don't
think it was y'all, but I was talking to somebody,
and I was like, I was talking to somebody about
what it's like being in your thirties, and I joke,
right now, it's a joke. Who knows what I might
revert back to be. For a while, it wasn't a
joke when I didn't want to talk about my age

(53:41):
and all the hang ups I had about it in
my mind, and then I finally got over it. So
now it's just a running joke. I know I'm thirty seven,
and I'm okay with that. Now I'm comfortable with it,
so I just like to play. I be playing, y'all
sometimes even when I sound serious. But I think that
sometimes people just have these ideas of how they are,

(54:03):
how they want their lives, and they have a hard
time grasping reality. I've been there, and sometimes you gotta
grasp reality and like, face yourself, face the other people,
and do what you have to do to do better
and move forward in your life. You can't be on
the internet forever talking shit about people, complaining about how

(54:24):
people are dating, how people are handling their relationships, when
really you're just unhappy and you've got to figure out
what you want for yourself, what works for you won't
work for everybody, and find your person. Stop trying to
make everybody conform to what you want. You don't need everybody.

(54:44):
It's crazy to me and I think that. No, everybody's
not okay. Yeah, it's people need help. You wanted help,
and ladies, I help. Y'all get it? Yeah, everybody. You
got to be honest to see the women saying it too.
But I'm not getting on y'all because girl power. That
was black pols. But girl power whatever that is? What

(55:04):
is a girl power symbol? Does anybody know? Ladies? I mean,
we all just do this and stick out our tongues.
Maybe it's like we don't know. Can somebody tell us?
Can y'all tell us any mojis? Yeah? Girl bag bag love?
Oh yeah that's what. That's what. I love that. That's
a good one. Yeah. It always looks cute for you.

(55:26):
I love it. I just pop.

Speaker 3 (55:30):
Oh, let me tell you something. I recently went up
to my girl. I went to Kelsey and she's oh
met svy girl. She had anpisode. We talked all about
injections and feelings. Yes, she did what's called a neffer
td neck. Have you ever heard about it? She is
putting make it chiseled. It makes it chiseled. And I've
never got botox, so I've only got it on my forehead.

(55:51):
And she was like, no, we're gonna do a nephew.

Speaker 1 (55:52):
You don't have no giraffe neck. I can tell her that.

Speaker 3 (55:55):
She was like, she, I don't actually know what it does,
but I like it. And it basic pulls from the
bottom and I was like, oh my gosh, it's called
a Neffertit neck. And then I was.

Speaker 1 (56:07):
Like, m remind me to show you one of the
real housewives of Potomac snacks because it's probably the opposite
of that. I don't want to say her. I love her,
and she's a beautiful girl. She knows exactly who it is.
There's so many things you can do. Also.

Speaker 3 (56:23):
Okay, so I've had my eyebrows microblader before, but uh,
a couple of days ago, I went and got my
eyebrows laminated intented.

Speaker 1 (56:31):
I just wanted to see, like what it what it?
I love being a woman.

Speaker 3 (56:35):
But I went and got my eyebrows laminated intented, and
I absolutely love it. Now it's not as permanent as microblading,
but and I got the microblade with your girl like through.
I think at this point it's like three years ago
and I hadn't gone back, and so the girl that
does my wax is she was like, I'm adding this
on as a service. You want to try it? And
I tried it and I fell in love with it.
She actually just started a new wax company. It's called

(56:59):
Sleek Sleek Waxing. I think it's in Buckhead, not the
Ghettut side, the Roswell side, the Roswell roadside. And it's
such a vibe, like she's a really comfy but I
just think when you experience good service from people, it's
so important to like be like her bed is comfortable.
The little bed you lay on. I don't know if
you ever got your lashes or something, and you lay
on that bed and it's hard, and it's like, dang,

(57:19):
you're you're talented, but I'm so uncomfortable.

Speaker 1 (57:22):
I can't come back uncomfortable with my eyes already burning.

Speaker 3 (57:25):
You gotta care about the consumer, and she she she
really did a great job of my eyebrows. I love
her name is Ali. Thank you, Yeah, y'all.

Speaker 1 (57:34):
But the the folks is out here unwell.

Speaker 3 (57:36):
And that's why I say, ask some of these simple
questions so you can see where somebody's mental state is
at and again be yourself. This whole thing we were
going to talk about, like some of the traits that
we see in regular everyday men and people that I
personally saw in Diddy on the documentary.

Speaker 1 (57:53):
And I mean, well it might be a few weeks anyway.
We had other topics out of time. We're gonna save
them though, because they are really good conversation points. But
I hope that you guys enjoyed this. We're out of
time for this one, but we're gonna move on and
you know, change our clothes so that we can get

(58:14):
ready for the next episode. But I hope you guys
enjoyed this. I wanted to ask everybody drop some questions
in the comments or if you're watching this on Instagram,
let us know some questions that you like to ask
on dates that aren't necessarily deal breakers. I won't make
it that harsh, but they're good questions to ask that
you would recommend to your girlfriends or your guy friends

(58:35):
to help you kind of see if this person is
in alignment with you and your future, Like the do
you read? We know that you love reading books, right,
and you love self care, healing and like always trying
to better yourself. So I would think if somebody doesn't
even want to pick up a book might not be

(58:57):
a match, or if they are anti that it's not
so Asking if you like to read and what you
like to read is a perfect question, and you.

Speaker 3 (59:04):
Don't have to be a bookworm. I just I appreciate
it that the man was honest to me. That also
says and he was like, no, I don't be reading.

Speaker 1 (59:11):
He didn't lie.

Speaker 3 (59:12):
And then it's like, because that's worse to me, Like
it's not like a hard no if you don't read.
It's just we're getting to know each other.

Speaker 1 (59:19):
I would like to know where you are.

Speaker 3 (59:20):
Also, if you need a little script, let us know
if you If you know that you struggle with conversation,
let us know you can you can get better at it.

Speaker 1 (59:28):
It's like you have also get I'm curious to know
from I'm curious to know that a calm and there's
so many questions there that are great. Whether you're knee
deep in a situation, relationship, whatever, or you're getting.

Speaker 3 (59:40):
To know somebody, you can really quick announcements. I wanted
to y'all know I love coffee. That is why my
Instagram my Instagram name is coffee Bean Dian. I absolutely
love coffee. I love coffee shops, all the things I
do with coffee. I love coffee candles, coffee smell. There
is a coffee brand that I discovered and it's black
woman owned. I wanted to shout her out. It is
called When you go to the website, it looks like
ho tea coffee shop, but that is not the name

(01:00:05):
of it. It's called I think it's called like House
of Tea, Espresso and Teeth, something like that. But the
coffee is really good. They have a house favorite it
startus or the Snickerdoodle con I like just regular coffee girl.

Speaker 1 (01:00:18):
The Snickerdoodle is good. But y'all check her out. Uh.

Speaker 3 (01:00:22):
She has a discount right now for new customers. You
get five percent off if you use code welcome five
And the website is h O e T Coffeeshop dot
my shopify dot com. It is amazing coffee. As a
coffee drinker and coffee lover, check it out. It's one
of I won't I don't know if it's my favorite
yet because I gotta keep trying coffee for a little bit,

(01:00:42):
but it's really good. Also, Paradise and Vibe. We're going
to Turkey September fourth through the tenth. Make sure you
guys book If you aren't able to come to Thailand
with me, you can come to Turkey. And that is
more of a wellness retreat. We're doing this the body scan,
a lot of different things in the itinerary for that retreat.
I'm really excited about it. Paradise and Vibe dot com
and tell them that I sent you.

Speaker 1 (01:01:04):
And I just want to remind you guys that the
book club is alive, well and strong, and we've been
getting new members. A shout out to y'all. Thank y'all
for joining us. I'm gonna let y'all know for December
we are currently reading April's Fool by Annetta Sequila, and
in January we're reading ten Thousand Hours with a Rich Minute.

(01:01:24):
So in my book club, the Drinks and Reads the
book Club, we have at least two meetings a month
and one of them is a happy hour, which we
will be having when you hear this tonight. It's a
virtual happy hour, so no matter where you are. And
then at the very end of the month or very
beginning of the month, depending on how the month flows,
we will have our discussion of the book, so you

(01:01:46):
have all months to read it and sometimes a little
bit of extra. So let me just tell y'all a
quick snippet about the books, because I realized I don't
always tell y'all about them, and when I do, y'all
love that. Even if you don't join the book club,
which is totally fine. I just want y'all read. Sometimes
we don't have to watch TV, we don't have to
watch movies. And this is not literature or self help.

(01:02:07):
To be clear, these.

Speaker 3 (01:02:08):
Are our smart books.

Speaker 1 (01:02:09):
Just read. These are our fun books. And when we
meet in the book club, whether it's Happy Hour day
or book club days, sometimes if people have read something
that has really helped them or enlightened them, they share it.
But we just try to read for fun and de
stress in a different way without doing you know, some
of our bad habits. But anyways, okay, so this book

(01:02:29):
is for anybody who's ignored a red flag because the
man looked good in a Nike tech suit. I hope
y'all saw the young boys in their quarterships and you
are moving that way. If not you need to get
on your zoom. That might be an old lady saying now,
but I still like it and I'm gonna keep saying
it for six more months anyway. So it's toxic, it's twisty,

(01:02:52):
and it's giving. I know better, but I won't do better.
I have been there before. I recently divorced that lifestyle,
and I know if y'all have, everybody who's writing into
advice has, so I hope that you join us. And
then we're also reading ten Thousand Hours with a Rich
Minace by Jaquelle J. When I tell you this man
is dangerous because he's wealthy, he's a lot of things,

(01:03:14):
disrespectful and irresistible. Yes, he's fine, and he's rich, and
he's got power. He's got all the things you want,
all the things you need, and all the things you don't.
But that it just keeps coming back. Anyway, you're going
to close the book like Lord, send me one, but
remove the consequences, okay. And that's what I like to
read about when I'm reading anything that might have a
steamy element. There's crime, there's drama, there's some suspense. So

(01:03:37):
that will be January's books. So no matter when you join,
just join. It's patreon dot com. Slash Kiki said, so,
and if you like to read and kind of talk
about books with other people, that's what we do. But
it's not stract. If you don't finish the book, nobody's
mad at you. Nobody cares. It's fine. We will just
let you know when we're about to spoil shit. So
if you want to mute us or log off and

(01:03:58):
come back on.

Speaker 3 (01:03:59):
We got you.

Speaker 1 (01:04:00):
Anyway. It's open to everybody. We only have women, but
it's open to everybody. No joy. Also, if you're struggling
with communication, reading help.

Speaker 3 (01:04:08):
That's my ab reading.

Speaker 1 (01:04:09):
You can learn more books, I mean not books, more words. Yeah,
and see different perspectives without actually having to have real
life consequences of dealing with people and possibly messing things up.
There's so many things. Y'all read some books. And I've
updated the Patreon so even if you join as a
free member, you can see past books. So check check

(01:04:30):
it out. Anyway. That's it for this week. Make sure
you're following us online. We are at Cocktails podcast. I'm
at Keky said, so, I'm at coffee. I'm gonna run
to the restroom and change and we'll see you guys
next week.

Speaker 2 (01:04:42):
Bye, goodbye, bye, bye bye relations, goodbye bye bye bye
bye bye.

Speaker 3 (01:05:00):
The kingd

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