October 17, 2023 • 15 mins
We’re continuing with the #LeaderSHIFT series on the podcast this week. These episodes are very direct & to the point, where we'll talk about the different challenges leaders tend to face & how to shift into becoming an influential leader who leads a healthy culture & engaged team!
In this episode, I’m sharing how you can shift from being closed off to humanity to showing compassion daily!
Mentioned in this episode:
The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace: Empowering Organizations by Encouraging People:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/080246176X/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=080246176X&linkCode=as2&tag=b0b869-20&linkId=e9b43a95dd8371f7aa083748fadaca6d
Need one-on-one help with your employee engagement plan? Schedule your complimentary clarity call with me here!
www.baproinc.com/ep150
Apply to join the New Leader, BIG IMPACT Coaching Program to level up your leadership & build an engaging team... even if the culture is toxic & without management's support!
https://baproinc.com/newleaderbigimpact
Questions about this episode? Topic suggestions for future episodes? Send them to culture@businessadvocatespro.com
Let's chat about this episode on Twitter: @BAPROINC or IG: @CultureBuildingPRO
The Culture Building like a PRO Podcast: Simple ways to transform your company culture... Today! | Company Culture | Culture Building | Organizational Culture | Employee Engagement | Effective Leadership | Servant Leadership |
baproinc.com
In this episode, I’m sharing how you can shift from being closed off to humanity to showing compassion daily!
Mentioned in this episode:
The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace: Empowering Organizations by Encouraging People:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/080246176X/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=080246176X&linkCode=as2&tag=b0b869-20&linkId=e9b43a95dd8371f7aa083748fadaca6d
Need one-on-one help with your employee engagement plan? Schedule your complimentary clarity call with me here!
www.baproinc.com/ep150
Apply to join the New Leader, BIG IMPACT Coaching Program to level up your leadership & build an engaging team... even if the culture is toxic & without management's support!
https://baproinc.com/newleaderbigimpact
Questions about this episode? Topic suggestions for future episodes? Send them to culture@businessadvocatespro.com
Let's chat about this episode on Twitter: @BAPROINC or IG: @CultureBuildingPRO
The Culture Building like a PRO Podcast: Simple ways to transform your company culture... Today! | Company Culture | Culture Building | Organizational Culture | Employee Engagement | Effective Leadership | Servant Leadership |
baproinc.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:04):
Welcome to the Culture Building Like aPro podcast, helping small business owners and
managers lead a company culture where employeesare engaged to do their best work because
they want to and not because theyhave to. Now, let's jump start
your culture transformation with company culture strategists, leadership coach and trainer Deanna Appling.
(00:28):
Happy Tuesday and thanks for listening tothe Culture Building Like a Pro Podcast.
I'm Diana and I'm excited to beback with you again this week for another
episode in our hash tag Leadershift series. As you know, these episodes are
directed to the point and we talkabout common challenges that we tend to face
as leaders, how to overcome them, and more importantly, how we can
(00:52):
make intentional shifts into the level ofleadership that creates an impact and influences excellence
among your team. I was recentlywatching an episode of a TV show and
there was a scene where there werea group of guys at work and they
were sitting in the breakroom eating andhaving lunch, and there was also another
(01:12):
guy who was off to himself eatinghis lunch alone. He wasn't at the
table with the rest of his coworkers, and so the table with the group
of guys. They started to makefun of him, poke at him,
and just basically nitpick everything about him, what he was eating and things of
(01:33):
that nature. And the guy whowas eating by himself, you can tell
just by watching him, even thoughhe wasn't saying anything to these guys,
he seemed sad. His energy wasvery low, he seemed heavy. You
can tell that he wasn't filling hisbest in that moment. So after a
little bit of his coworkers picking onhim, he grabbed his things and he
(01:57):
left the breakroom. Shortly after that, it cut to a scene where he
was home and his home was indisarray. There was a lot of conflict
and arguing his son had issues.You could tell that that was weighing on
him and that he wasn't happy withhis life at that point, and even
(02:19):
in his home life, much likewhat happened in the break room, he
was being talked down to, hewas being made fun of. And so
a few days later, I foundmyself thinking about this episode because it's very
true to what can happen more oftenthan we think in the workplace. One
of the blind spots in leadership isoften focusing solely on performance and the thing
(02:45):
about this is before our team showsup to perform, Before they show up
to work as an employee, theyare showing up as whole individuals with lives
and whatever their going through, whetherit's good or bad, it does affect
them when they come to work.This could be family issues, financial issues,
(03:10):
maybe there was a recent death inthe family, Maybe a child is
sick, maybe a pet isn't doingwell. The list can go on and
on about why someone may not beshowing to work full of life and full
of energy and performing their best.And I think that it's time for us
(03:30):
to be mindful of this daily becauselife happens to everyone, including us daily.
So in today's leadershift, we aretalking about shifting from being closed off
to humanity and shifting to showing compassion. It is so important for us,
(03:51):
especially as leaders, to know thatour people, our team, are showing
up to work and they're still dealingwith very real life situations outside the office.
And while we may not be ableto fix those things for them,
we can be a positive impact andinfluence and how we interact with them day
to day and just simply be humanenough to acknowledge their humanity. So the
(04:16):
first thing that you can do toshift from being closed off to humanity to
showing more compassion to your team isto have authentic conversations. I know that
sounds very simple, but think aboutit. If you're at work, you
tend to talk about work more oftenas you should. I mean, we
are in a place of business,so work is a priority. But let's
(04:39):
get back to relationship building. Askyour team how they're doing, and mean
it. Don't just ask because it'sa part of the natural full of conversation,
but be genuinely curious about their wellbeing. Sometimes people just simply need
a minute to just share, andyou can help being a listening ear.
(05:01):
It may seem small, but itcan go a long way, and it
opens the door for more relationship building. The next thing that you can do
is personalize how you show appreciation topeople in your team. I don't come
from the mindset that showing appreciation toteam members is a one size fit all
(05:21):
approach. Everyone receives appreciation differently,so find out what is more meaningful to
people in your team. And Iknow you've heard me talk about the book
by Gary Chapman plenty of times onthis podcast, The Five Languages of appreciation
in the workplace. But it basicallyputs into perspective or categories five ways that
(05:46):
employees tend to feel appreciated, andyou, as a leader, can foster
a culture of appreciation and understand moreso, what each person views as appreciation
to them personally. Is it praiseand recognition, is it monetary bonuses,
whatever that is, find out andmake it a point to show appreciation to
(06:09):
each person in a way that resonateswith them. This could even go as
far as giving tokens of appreciation likegift cards, writing a handwritten note,
writing a thank you card, whateverthat is. Make it a priority to
implement that in your leadership practices.The next thing that you can do is
encourage work life harmony. And ifyou've listened to a previous episode not too
(06:33):
long ago, we talked about thedifference between work life balance and work life
harmony. Balance implies that there isequal contribution to each part of your life,
and we know, because of theway life works, that's impossible to
do. But work life harmony meansthat even though the contribution in the amount
(06:54):
of effort may not be equal orbalanced, whatever that effort is tending to
it and encouraging harmony can help someonenot feel as stressed or burn out as
quickly in the workplace, So encourageyour team to take their breaks, Encourage
your team to use vacation time tounplug to recharge, and if at all
(07:18):
possible, you can also influence themto be mindful of work life harmony by
respecting their personal time, meaning ifyou can avoid reaching out to them after
hours on the weekend, try todo so out of respect for the lives
that they have outside of the workplace. The next way that you can show
(07:41):
compassion is to empower and encourage autonomy, and that simply means showing your team
that you trust them to make decisions, solve problems, and do their work
on their own without being micromanaged.This not only releases the pressure of getting
work done and their large workload.Perhaps, but if employees have autonomy to
(08:07):
be trusted to do their work andthey know that you believe in them and
trust them enough to do their workwithout monitoring everything that they do throughout a
workday, this allows them a senseof control and ownership in their day,
So maybe they can take their breaksinstead of feeling like if they're away from
(08:30):
their desk or out of their officefor a period of time, and if
they're not seen, then it couldbe viewed by you or someone else in
management as them being absent. Anotherway that you can help show compassion to
your team in the workplace is tocreate an environment that is vocal about mental
(08:52):
health awareness. I know that overthe past few years there has been a
lot of discussion about bringing a wayawareness to mental health, and although this
can be a delicate subject to navigatewith your team, it's important to just
simply do your part by creating anenvironment where there can be conversations held where
(09:16):
someone doesn't have to feel ashamed bycoming to you saying that they mentally don't
feel their best that day and thatthey need to leave early, or that
they're struggling with depression or anxiety,whatever the case is. You can help
free the stigma of just simply havingthe conversation about what could be going on
with someone on your team mentally,and that doesn't require you to be the
(09:39):
person to fix things for them.But as long as they know that they
don't have to hide what is happeningwith their mental health, you've already done
your part. And being a resourcefor them to encourage them to take care
of themselves. And the last waythat you can shift from being closed off
(10:00):
to humanity to simply showing compassion inyour leadership practices is to incorporate small acts
of kindness in your leadership. Littlethings matter. Sometimes it's not about grand
gestures, but just simple things thatshow people that you care. And what
better way for that to happen thanwith the people you work with every day.
(10:24):
You can surprise your team as awhole with small acts of kindness by
bringing them lunch, or celebrating someone'sbirthday, having team building events or anything
that you know is going to bewell received as appreciation from your team.
But you can also do this individually. We mentioned it earlier, but little
(10:45):
things like handwritten notes specifically acknowledging somethingthat they did, in other words,
not being vague about their efforts,but what's something that you noticed about them
that really shows who they are,the integrity that they have on the team,
the value that they add on theteam, something that they probably don't
even pay attention to, but itmakes a difference in how your team flows.
(11:11):
And I would also encourage you tolook at small acts of kindness as
something that you can do to buildthe culture on your team and encourage people
to want to show small acts ofkindness as well. You can do this
by incorporating a pay it forward typeof method on your team. I don't
know if you've ever experienced this ordone this for someone or or received it,
(11:37):
but I know that occasionally, ifI'm in a dunkin Donuts drive through
or a Starbucks drive through or whathave you, if I feel prompted in
my heart to pay it forward tothe people behind me, I'll pay for
their order. Recently, I actuallyjust did that for two teenage boys.
They were so cute. They werein the drive through, but both of
(11:58):
them were on their bikes, andI ask them to pull forward or to
you know, ride their bikes forward, and I paid for their orders for
them. You don't have to justdo this to complete strangers. You can
do this on your team. Somaybe you can do this where it is
anonymous and it's a surprise, wheremaybe you give someone a gift card and
(12:20):
it again acknowledge something that they've specificallydone in a card or something, or
maybe give them a plant, whateverthe gift choice you want to choose that's
fine, but you can give thisto one person on your team and then
encourage them in that note or inthat card to pay it forward to someone
else. So what you're doing isintentionally creating a team culture of generosity where
(12:46):
people look for ways to be kindto each other. This can also help
show compassion not just from you,but even from someone on their team and
even anonymously, who knows what thatrecipient had been going through that day,
and that small little gesture that someoneacknowledged something that they did it can change
(13:09):
the trajectory of how they feel thatday and make them feel like they are
appreciated for what they do. Ifthis episode was helpful for you, I
would love it if you could notonly leave an honest rating and review an
Apple podcast or wherever you're listening from, but share it with another leader,
(13:30):
Share it with another professional so thatwe can start creating somewhat of a snowball
effect of just simply showing up ascompassionate leaders in the workplace. Remember that
before your team shows up to workas an employee, they are first showing
up as a human. And welive in a world where it's common to
(13:54):
be disconnected from others than it isto be connected. And while we can't
change this all over the world,you can start to implement this change in
your workplace and with your team.Not by programs, not by surveys,
not by data, but by simplybeing compassionate and acknowledging that your team is
(14:18):
dealing with real life issues no matterwhere they are, and that does include
being in the workspace. Keep inmind that being a servant leader and being
a compassionate leader is not a weakness, is actually a superpower, and this
superpower can help you transform not onlythe culture in your workplace, but it
(14:39):
can help you bring out the bestin your team and show them that they
are seen, acknowledged and respected aspeople first and not just performers. Have
a great week.
Welcome to the Culture Building Like aPro podcast, helping small business owners and
managers lead a company culture where employeesare engaged to do their best work because
they want to and not because theyhave to. Now, let's jump start
your culture transformation with company culture strategists, leadership coach and trainer Deanna Appling.
(00:28):
Happy Tuesday and thanks for listening tothe Culture Building Like a Pro Podcast.
I'm Diana and I'm excited to beback with you again this week for another
episode in our hash tag Leadershift series. As you know, these episodes are
directed to the point and we talkabout common challenges that we tend to face
as leaders, how to overcome them, and more importantly, how we can
(00:52):
make intentional shifts into the level ofleadership that creates an impact and influences excellence
among your team. I was recentlywatching an episode of a TV show and
there was a scene where there werea group of guys at work and they
were sitting in the breakroom eating andhaving lunch, and there was also another
(01:12):
guy who was off to himself eatinghis lunch alone. He wasn't at the
table with the rest of his coworkers, and so the table with the group
of guys. They started to makefun of him, poke at him,
and just basically nitpick everything about him, what he was eating and things of
(01:33):
that nature. And the guy whowas eating by himself, you can tell
just by watching him, even thoughhe wasn't saying anything to these guys,
he seemed sad. His energy wasvery low, he seemed heavy. You
can tell that he wasn't filling hisbest in that moment. So after a
little bit of his coworkers picking onhim, he grabbed his things and he
(01:57):
left the breakroom. Shortly after that, it cut to a scene where he
was home and his home was indisarray. There was a lot of conflict
and arguing his son had issues.You could tell that that was weighing on
him and that he wasn't happy withhis life at that point, and even
(02:19):
in his home life, much likewhat happened in the break room, he
was being talked down to, hewas being made fun of. And so
a few days later, I foundmyself thinking about this episode because it's very
true to what can happen more oftenthan we think in the workplace. One
of the blind spots in leadership isoften focusing solely on performance and the thing
(02:45):
about this is before our team showsup to perform, Before they show up
to work as an employee, theyare showing up as whole individuals with lives
and whatever their going through, whetherit's good or bad, it does affect
them when they come to work.This could be family issues, financial issues,
(03:10):
maybe there was a recent death inthe family, Maybe a child is
sick, maybe a pet isn't doingwell. The list can go on and
on about why someone may not beshowing to work full of life and full
of energy and performing their best.And I think that it's time for us
(03:30):
to be mindful of this daily becauselife happens to everyone, including us daily.
So in today's leadershift, we aretalking about shifting from being closed off
to humanity and shifting to showing compassion. It is so important for us,
(03:51):
especially as leaders, to know thatour people, our team, are showing
up to work and they're still dealingwith very real life situations outside the office.
And while we may not be ableto fix those things for them,
we can be a positive impact andinfluence and how we interact with them day
to day and just simply be humanenough to acknowledge their humanity. So the
(04:16):
first thing that you can do toshift from being closed off to humanity to
showing more compassion to your team isto have authentic conversations. I know that
sounds very simple, but think aboutit. If you're at work, you
tend to talk about work more oftenas you should. I mean, we
are in a place of business,so work is a priority. But let's
(04:39):
get back to relationship building. Askyour team how they're doing, and mean
it. Don't just ask because it'sa part of the natural full of conversation,
but be genuinely curious about their wellbeing. Sometimes people just simply need
a minute to just share, andyou can help being a listening ear.
(05:01):
It may seem small, but itcan go a long way, and it
opens the door for more relationship building. The next thing that you can do
is personalize how you show appreciation topeople in your team. I don't come
from the mindset that showing appreciation toteam members is a one size fit all
(05:21):
approach. Everyone receives appreciation differently,so find out what is more meaningful to
people in your team. And Iknow you've heard me talk about the book
by Gary Chapman plenty of times onthis podcast, The Five Languages of appreciation
in the workplace. But it basicallyputs into perspective or categories five ways that
(05:46):
employees tend to feel appreciated, andyou, as a leader, can foster
a culture of appreciation and understand moreso, what each person views as appreciation
to them personally. Is it praiseand recognition, is it monetary bonuses,
whatever that is, find out andmake it a point to show appreciation to
(06:09):
each person in a way that resonateswith them. This could even go as
far as giving tokens of appreciation likegift cards, writing a handwritten note,
writing a thank you card, whateverthat is. Make it a priority to
implement that in your leadership practices.The next thing that you can do is
encourage work life harmony. And ifyou've listened to a previous episode not too
(06:33):
long ago, we talked about thedifference between work life balance and work life
harmony. Balance implies that there isequal contribution to each part of your life,
and we know, because of theway life works, that's impossible to
do. But work life harmony meansthat even though the contribution in the amount
(06:54):
of effort may not be equal orbalanced, whatever that effort is tending to
it and encouraging harmony can help someonenot feel as stressed or burn out as
quickly in the workplace, So encourageyour team to take their breaks, Encourage
your team to use vacation time tounplug to recharge, and if at all
(07:18):
possible, you can also influence themto be mindful of work life harmony by
respecting their personal time, meaning ifyou can avoid reaching out to them after
hours on the weekend, try todo so out of respect for the lives
that they have outside of the workplace. The next way that you can show
(07:41):
compassion is to empower and encourage autonomy, and that simply means showing your team
that you trust them to make decisions, solve problems, and do their work
on their own without being micromanaged.This not only releases the pressure of getting
work done and their large workload.Perhaps, but if employees have autonomy to
(08:07):
be trusted to do their work andthey know that you believe in them and
trust them enough to do their workwithout monitoring everything that they do throughout a
workday, this allows them a senseof control and ownership in their day,
So maybe they can take their breaksinstead of feeling like if they're away from
(08:30):
their desk or out of their officefor a period of time, and if
they're not seen, then it couldbe viewed by you or someone else in
management as them being absent. Anotherway that you can help show compassion to
your team in the workplace is tocreate an environment that is vocal about mental
(08:52):
health awareness. I know that overthe past few years there has been a
lot of discussion about bringing a wayawareness to mental health, and although this
can be a delicate subject to navigatewith your team, it's important to just
simply do your part by creating anenvironment where there can be conversations held where
(09:16):
someone doesn't have to feel ashamed bycoming to you saying that they mentally don't
feel their best that day and thatthey need to leave early, or that
they're struggling with depression or anxiety,whatever the case is. You can help
free the stigma of just simply havingthe conversation about what could be going on
with someone on your team mentally,and that doesn't require you to be the
(09:39):
person to fix things for them.But as long as they know that they
don't have to hide what is happeningwith their mental health, you've already done
your part. And being a resourcefor them to encourage them to take care
of themselves. And the last waythat you can shift from being closed off
(10:00):
to humanity to simply showing compassion inyour leadership practices is to incorporate small acts
of kindness in your leadership. Littlethings matter. Sometimes it's not about grand
gestures, but just simple things thatshow people that you care. And what
better way for that to happen thanwith the people you work with every day.
(10:24):
You can surprise your team as awhole with small acts of kindness by
bringing them lunch, or celebrating someone'sbirthday, having team building events or anything
that you know is going to bewell received as appreciation from your team.
But you can also do this individually. We mentioned it earlier, but little
(10:45):
things like handwritten notes specifically acknowledging somethingthat they did, in other words,
not being vague about their efforts,but what's something that you noticed about them
that really shows who they are,the integrity that they have on the team,
the value that they add on theteam, something that they probably don't
even pay attention to, but itmakes a difference in how your team flows.
(11:11):
And I would also encourage you tolook at small acts of kindness as
something that you can do to buildthe culture on your team and encourage people
to want to show small acts ofkindness as well. You can do this
by incorporating a pay it forward typeof method on your team. I don't
know if you've ever experienced this ordone this for someone or or received it,
(11:37):
but I know that occasionally, ifI'm in a dunkin Donuts drive through
or a Starbucks drive through or whathave you, if I feel prompted in
my heart to pay it forward tothe people behind me, I'll pay for
their order. Recently, I actuallyjust did that for two teenage boys.
They were so cute. They werein the drive through, but both of
(11:58):
them were on their bikes, andI ask them to pull forward or to
you know, ride their bikes forward, and I paid for their orders for
them. You don't have to justdo this to complete strangers. You can
do this on your team. Somaybe you can do this where it is
anonymous and it's a surprise, wheremaybe you give someone a gift card and
(12:20):
it again acknowledge something that they've specificallydone in a card or something, or
maybe give them a plant, whateverthe gift choice you want to choose that's
fine, but you can give thisto one person on your team and then
encourage them in that note or inthat card to pay it forward to someone
else. So what you're doing isintentionally creating a team culture of generosity where
(12:46):
people look for ways to be kindto each other. This can also help
show compassion not just from you,but even from someone on their team and
even anonymously, who knows what thatrecipient had been going through that day,
and that small little gesture that someoneacknowledged something that they did it can change
(13:09):
the trajectory of how they feel thatday and make them feel like they are
appreciated for what they do. Ifthis episode was helpful for you, I
would love it if you could notonly leave an honest rating and review an
Apple podcast or wherever you're listening from, but share it with another leader,
(13:30):
Share it with another professional so thatwe can start creating somewhat of a snowball
effect of just simply showing up ascompassionate leaders in the workplace. Remember that
before your team shows up to workas an employee, they are first showing
up as a human. And welive in a world where it's common to
(13:54):
be disconnected from others than it isto be connected. And while we can't
change this all over the world,you can start to implement this change in
your workplace and with your team.Not by programs, not by surveys,
not by data, but by simplybeing compassionate and acknowledging that your team is
(14:18):
dealing with real life issues no matterwhere they are, and that does include
being in the workspace. Keep inmind that being a servant leader and being
a compassionate leader is not a weakness, is actually a superpower, and this
superpower can help you transform not onlythe culture in your workplace, but it
(14:39):
can help you bring out the bestin your team and show them that they
are seen, acknowledged and respected aspeople first and not just performers. Have
a great week.
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