DA TESTIMONY WITH PAULA BRION #116 w/ Nikita Hansford | Adult Mental Health Advisor, Author, Life Coach - DA TESTIMONY WITH PAULA BRION

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
M hm hm h m hm, m hm hm hm.

Speaker 2 (00:26):
M hm.

Speaker 3 (00:29):
The testimony, the testimony, The testimony.

Speaker 2 (00:35):
With Paula Brea, the Dama for Christ Day out battle
tuning every Tuesday and not he's since then.

Speaker 1 (00:53):
The time.

Speaker 3 (00:56):
You are listening to the testimony with Hope ak Deep
for Christ An In case you don't know what death
stands for.

Speaker 4 (01:07):
It's divinely inspired vessel, appointed and anointed for a time
such as this.

Speaker 1 (01:15):
Hey, every Tuesday at nine pm Eastern. You don't want
to miss you? Good? Oh now now now, God bless you, God,

(01:40):
bless you, God bless you. Yes, this is Paula Brion,
the Diva for Christ. Yes, and you know where we're
well on the testimony, God given testimony, our show and
you know we do nothing before we go to the
throne of God and of and today would be no different.

(02:02):
Father God, I just would have you to have your
way with this platform. This is your show and I
want you to do exactly what needs to be done
for your people, your listeners.

Speaker 5 (02:16):
Father God, I asked that you would just use us
in a mighty way so that the listeners that need
to hear a word from you on today.

Speaker 1 (02:27):
Will be encouraged and uplifted and.

Speaker 5 (02:30):
Just spoken to their hearts, reached people that are in need,
that just need a word on today. We ask that
we will be that for them on today, educating them
in ways that they need to know about the business
and what it is to do your business, kingdom building
business are more so than anything, is what we need

(02:54):
for the people, your people to hear on today, Father God,
we ask all this in the precious name above all
means Jesus Christ.

Speaker 1 (03:03):
Amen a man, Amen, Amen. Yes, I am in the
building and I tell you we do this every single
Tuesday at nine pm Eastern Standard time, and praise God.
I was able to open my eyes on today just
to do another work for the Lord, and I'm excited
about that. But today we gonna bring to you just wonderful,

(03:28):
wonderful woman. My sister in Christ, Nakita Hadsford is gonna
be here the CEO. She is just a life coach,
She's an offer, I mean, just health advisor. Let me
tell you something, this woman of God is on a
mission and she's on fire and we have her to

(03:49):
just bless the listeners on today. My girl, Nadi, are
you in the house. I'm in the building. How you
going what no expense? How you feel you feeling groovy?
That's it. That's it. How we like it on this show.

(04:11):
That's how we like it. We need you to bring
it on on today. And I just thank you, thank
you for being on here just to bless the listeners
and give them what they need, you know, and I
know you have a word for them on today and
just so much to offer to the listener. So bless
God for you. But you know, I'm gonna start it
like I do every time I come on. I got

(04:32):
to ask a question so the listeners get to know
who you are personally. How did it begin for you?
How did this walk that you're on? How did it
start from the key up? Oh? Wow? How did this
walk start for me? Well? I've often referred to myself

(04:52):
as a concrete rolls, one who is chosen before the
beginning of time to do destiny kingdom work. You heard, listen.
Life did not start out easy at all for me,
for any of you who may be familiar with me,
and for some of you ll not, Yeah, y'appa find

(05:15):
out I was born in the look in the nineteen
hundred cist. Yes, in the period of time that we
refer to as the seventies. That was the seventies baby
born to an drug addicted mother. So again, that just

(05:35):
predicated that I would be born prematurely addicted to drugs. Now,
according to medical science and the things that the naysayers
tend to say when they see a certain situation, but
doesn't understand the Master's plan. You know, I was told
that I was not supposed to possess any high level

(05:57):
of intelligence because of again the conditions under which I
was born. But praise be to God, Praise be to
God that though it looked one way, he kept my
mind even in my mother's womb. And I'm grateful to
say that I was one of them young folks that

(06:18):
knew how to read proficiently before I started kindergarten. To
God be glory. Now, the journey, you know, wasn't easy
even then, because I was living in my grandmother's home
at that point in my life, and you know, life
again was life and for Grandma, and it wasn't necessarily

(06:40):
the best situation for me as a young girl. Can
I get real transparent? And well, can I get real
trans Yes? You can? All right, Listen, I tell my
testimony not to bring tears to anyone's eye. But to
encourage you, I was molested by the same mother, the

(07:01):
same person who was molesting my mother I was back then.
I now understand that I was chosen to break the
generational curse by using the sound of my voice. So, yeah,
the things was happening to me in my grandmother's home

(07:22):
even as we attended church services. Some things happened to
me in this church basement, you know something, The little
boys that grandma now left us to play with while
they was in the Bible study prayer meeting. While they
were taking me down to these rooms, and they were
doing these things to me, and I just went with
it because I thought it was normal. It was happening
to me at home. But here's the deal. Fast forward

(07:47):
here I am. My mama then came and got us.
She was living in California. She took us with her
as she was endeavoring to get her life together, and
at that point she believed she was standing only on
our own two feet. So she took me and my
older brother back to California with her, and again she
hadn't beaten her addiction, and that monster reared its ugly

(08:09):
head and we bounced from house to house, home to
home for a period of time. And there was even
a period of my youth before the age of ten,
where I spent time homeless and hungry. You know, I'm
grateful that we were in the state of California where
we were able to take walks and pull the fruit
off of the overhang of the trees. We were able

(08:33):
to mold grapefruits and lemons and oranges, you know, off
of the random yard, so we would have food because
my mom would be gone for days at a time.
Now here's the deal. I'm not talking about my mama
to kick her in her back. Let me tell you
something about my mama. She was a beautiful soul, but
she was broken because no one saved her, no one

(08:53):
heard her cry when she tried to tell what was
happening to her. And you know, we were eventually taken
from my mother from placed in the California foster care system.
I was born here in Jersey. But again, remember if
you heard me say, Mom came, got us, took us
to California, and within six months of us being out there,

(09:14):
we were in foster care. My brother and I. My
first foster family was a preacher and his wife, and
they took us to church. I come from a church
background where I'm a straight Apostolic and evangelist. My father
was a preacher. I'm a whole p K. So I'm

(09:36):
in this reverend at home and I'm hearing reaffirmed what
I had heard in the children's shelter before we were
placed with this family, that there was a man named
Jesus who could love me beyond my situation. I heard
the scripture that said when my father and my mother

(09:58):
forsake me, then the Lord would take me up. And
who child That didn't hit me like a ton of bricks,
and it stuck with me. It stuck with me. And
it was at the age of nine years old that
I confessed faith in Jesus Christ and accepted him as

(10:22):
my Lord and Savior, not necessarily understanding that that wouldn't
make my life a bed of roses just because I
said yes to Jesus. What I came to later understand
was that he really is a keeper, and when he
says He's sending you a comforter baby, you better believe
it beyond the shadow of a doubt. It was my

(10:47):
faith that sustained me through it all. It was my
faith that sustained me when I was bouched from that
home into another. And then it was my faith that
kept me when I was bounced from yet another home
into another, and I basically ended up in the home
of a woman named Essie. Now I'm grateful for the

(11:11):
life of miss s before guilt christ my most famous
foster mother. She was a chocolate brownkin girl like me,
but of course she's thirty years old at the time
that she took me into her home, and she loved
on me. She may have had access to my file

(11:34):
or whatever the social workers would have shared with her,
but she decided to read me and mirror for me
what life could be, showing me that I had the
ability to build the life that I desired for myself.

(11:55):
So in the time I spent with Mama Essie, she
encouraged me to stay smart, because God knows I love
to read. Even to this day, she encouraged me to
continue to sing because God knows I love to sing.
And she was a reflection that brown skinned girls are

(12:16):
beautiful because sist would fly. She still fly to this day.
I keep in contact with her. She's very intelligent and
that rubbed off on me and I even jokingly shared
with her recently. She's the reason why I sleep on
thirteen hundred three accounts most nights, nothing less, okay, because

(12:41):
she showed me, you know, you can do this, you
can do that. But even before you know the housekeeping
tips and the grooming tips and the encouraged you know
of being intelligent, you know, and expressing myself through my
creative gifts, she taught me the importance of keeping God
first and everything. I mean, it was very real. We

(13:03):
couldn't do anything on a Sunday afternoon unless we got
up and we went to church. We were taught and
as He's home to honor God. And you know, I
always went along because I already loved Jesus, so learning
more about him at a young age was no problem
for me. And then you know, of course, after church

(13:25):
most Sundays, we drive into the San Francisco Bay area
and go into Chinatown for some authentic Chinese food and
then follow it up with a shopping spree because they
had some family with outlets in San Francisco, California. But
I say this to say I don't look anything like

(13:45):
what I've been through, and to this day, I don't
live anything like what I've been through. Again, You've heard
me share that I confess faith in Jesus Christ at
a very young age, and one of my favorite things
to do became studying the Bible. I began to enjoy

(14:08):
Bible studies, multiple versions, going into even the Hebrew and
the Greek to understand exactly what it is. My heavenly
Father was speaking to me, and I grasped hole with
both hands with tight grip, Baby that his grace was
absolutely efficiently sufficient for me. So here I stand today,

(14:32):
I carry these earthly titles. What did you? What is it?
A CEO Mental health advocate, Life purpose coach And I'm
gonna put a pin in the conversation right there, Life Purpose,
Purpose hmm. There was a series and you know, we

(14:58):
did a study on book that was released some years
ago at the church I was attending at the time.
It was from a book titled The Purpose Driven Life.
I was a young wife and mother in the time,
and that was published by brother Rick Warren. And we
did this campaign where we read this book and I

(15:21):
promised you reading that and coupled with the Bible studies
we were participating in the Purpose Driven Life changed my
life to help me change my perspective on my past.
Because again, even at that point, yes, I'm loving God,
I'm I'm worship leading, I'm you know, I'm volunteering, I'm teaching,

(15:45):
but there was still a level of shame that I
carried about my past. Because when you're a young child,
then you have your mother come to your school half
dressed under the influence heavily. That leaves the trauma on
you when your friends and the ones that were already

(16:08):
not so friendly towards you, when they start to tease
you and alienate you because you weren't like them, but
they didn't live that experience, so some of those cars
were still with me. Fast forward to the Purpose Driven Life.
I began to understand that I read this book on

(16:29):
purpose so I could truly begin to do the deep
healing work in my soul that was necessary. I had
to face my past and its totality in order to
truly overcome and become the woman of God. Y'all see
standing before you today. So I'm order to have these

(16:50):
intimate conversations with God about every single aspect of my life.
And my first or of business was I need to
love my mother. I need to love my mother because
when I really started to walk out my face journey

(17:11):
at the age of nineteen, I realized that I didn't
know if I loved her, But I also know the
Bible told me and instructed me that I am to
honor my father and my mother. So my days when
we lost on the basis earth, and it didn't matter

(17:32):
what she did or didn't do, she was still worthy
of honor.

Speaker 6 (17:36):
So I began to study, to study love God's way,
to learn to love her God's way, and that turned
into my mother turned into my best friend.

Speaker 1 (17:54):
During our journey of getting to know one another, because
I was honest with her and saying, need a mother
right now. I'm an adult, I'm a moh you know,
and I've been mothered. So what I what I would
love to do is get to know you. Can you
be my friend? And she agreed and we talked and

(18:15):
the level of transparency that flowed between the two of
us there was never any judgment. I got on her
nerves sometimes she would tell me and vice versa, but
the thing that was steady was the love we had
for one another. I spent a year with my mother
by her side to make sure she stayed sober. Because

(18:35):
I had questions that I need answered answers to. I
needed to know why these things, these behaviors were manifesting.
And again, at this point in my faith walk, I
had began to learn about generational persons and again understanding
the level of trauma I was born into. Clearly, I'm

(18:57):
chosen to break a curve. Something's got to give here
because I have daughters and I need to protect them
from some of the things that happened to me. So
I had to learn the art of spiritual warfare. I
had to learn about the occult, those things, those still small,

(19:20):
those small boxes that come in and smaller the behind
of my spoiler mind, of my family. I needed to
cover my children. So I began to study the word
love my mama, defending her while she was alive, because
people did not want to take the time to understand
why she was what she was, why she became what

(19:41):
she was. It was trauma. So I've basically spent the
entirety of my professional life helping people because I remember
the people who helped us when my mother wasn't able to.
I remember saying to myself, I want to be like that,

(20:03):
I want to help somebody one day. Well look at
me now, Paula. I'm doing my best to help everybody
that I come and help them understand that there's a
purpose to it all. It's a perfect that's just it.
That's just it. And you're doing that in a great, great,

(20:25):
great way. And I'm just so blessed to have you
on today.

Speaker 5 (20:28):
I mean, the first time we talked on the phone,
it was like we knew each other forever.

Speaker 1 (20:32):
You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 5 (20:33):
That conversation was so uplifting and inspiring, and it's just you.

Speaker 1 (20:39):
You. You have a knack to meet people where they are.

Speaker 5 (20:45):
And that's what menik who she is, you know what
I'm saying, Because everybody can't do that, you know what
I'm saying, and.

Speaker 1 (20:52):
You do it so well. And I just commend you
for all the things that God has work through you
so that you can be a blessing to His people.
That is all order, and I give you kudos to
be able to do that. Yes, yes, honestly, you know,

(21:13):
I don't know if oftentimes you hear that, but I'm
saying this on today that I bless God for your test.
So the child this testimony, be this.

Speaker 5 (21:25):
Testimony for God's people, because that's what the show is
all about. It's about the test that we go through
those storms in our side that they speak about.

Speaker 1 (21:34):
That take us from platform form to platform, but in.

Speaker 5 (21:38):
Elevation to meet God just where he needs us to
be for his people.

Speaker 1 (21:45):
You are the bless God for you, bless God for
you and your walk. I mean that God has given
me that because you you are too, testimony of what
it takes and what it really.

Speaker 7 (22:01):
Needs, like you need to go to these these storms
that we go through, you know, to make you who
you are today and and and such a big woman
you are to forgive your mother.

Speaker 1 (22:16):
Listen, Paul, I'm trying to tell you you you you
preached on today. I'm telling you, Paul, you're talking to
her givens this, but us not. Then that's real. We
hear that and we dismiss it so often. Forgiveness is run.
It is not for this. I could not live in

(22:38):
this level of freedom had I not forgiven my mother.
Wos Yes, but that took work. And anyone who we're
all saying that the work of forgetting easy day, I'm
gonna say you right now, they don lie to your faith.
I'm to face yourself. You don't have to face yourself

(23:01):
and allow God to do the work that needs to
be completed in you. Oh. Yes, just want to learn
something works by learn some things about forgiveness. And I
you know, in my in my spricture studies, we have
these conversations. Forgiveness does encapsulate your body with illness? You

(23:25):
want to get sick walking? N forgiveness? I said, any
want to get sick walking? Unforgiveness? You know, most people
don't you know, believe me when I tell them my
beautiful queen age that I am this to this day.
They typically tend to think I'm tend to fifteen younger

(23:48):
years younger, and I often share that's because I keep
my soul intact. I talked to God about it all. Hi,
nothing because you already know. So we talked it out.
We talk it out because I knew if I hold
this forgiveness, it could be a manifestation of diabetes. It

(24:08):
could be a manifestation of premature premature onset, a high
blood pressure, or even memory loss. It could be cancer,
It could be arthritis. Because we create energy with our thoughts,
we create energy with our actions. So my actions needed

(24:32):
again to line up with love, which is a huge
part of forgiveness. Yes, you can't really do one without
the other. It's like oil and water. It does not mix. Now,
I'm not gonna walk around here and tell y'all I'm
some perfect human being. I am not. But what I

(24:54):
am is honest. When I get in God's presence, I
am maked and unashamed about everything going on in my life.
I hide nothing. We sing what is the song we
sing with? Holding nothing? With nothing? I was told nothing
from God. That's my good, my bad, and my ugly.

(25:21):
I keep it the buck with the Lord, and I
promise you today I decided to walk out of the
impost that I saw myself becoming and own who ni
Keita Handsford was Bebby Bebby. That's why I saw him respond, right,
I saw him responding. He still responds in a manner

(25:44):
that blows my mind. Every single time I cry. He's
very familiar with my voice because we talk all day
every day. So yeah, I I you know, I got
some people listening, and I just saw something comes through
my phone call and you can't see it, but this

(26:07):
sister just is listening and she said yes forgiveness and
she just went through the same thing with her parents.
It is so true. Hmm. So yeah, I want blessed God. No,
bless God that you had the opportunity. No, I mean

(26:27):
that thing, you know, because I had. You know, I
was raised in a single family home and my mom
raised me. And I'm not saying that I love my mom,
but I just wasn't. The difficult time of being a
girl raised by a woman who wanted a son was
a hard thing for me, you know, And I was

(26:48):
through many crowds and tribulations because I just didn't measure up.
I wasn't that boy, you know. I said, I wasn't
that boy. And my mother was really into sports and
very very gray. She loved boys, and you know, for
years I went through trying to prove myself and it
just to pretty much. I did what I could do

(27:08):
and then, you know, and what I needed to do,
you know, for me. But I always yearned.

Speaker 5 (27:13):
You always have that yearning to be that for whatever
it is that you want to be for your mother.
There's nothing like wanting to please your mother. And I
tried endlessly to do that, and I carry a lot
of guilt you know, because some people say, you know,
we'd end up fighting and fussing, and you know, and
sometimes it's like you should have been the bigger person, right,

(27:35):
but unfortunately it doesn't oftentimes happen like that.

Speaker 1 (27:38):
Your story is beautiful because you saw through it off
some people like she went to her glory without me
even being able to say I'm sorry. So there's a
lot of baggage that you carry with that, and you
call yourself trying to be a better parent when you
know to your.

Speaker 5 (27:58):
Kids as you you have children and stuff. So it's
so warming to hear you say that the lessons that
you learned, you were able to bestow that and treat
your mother with the respect to do her saith the Lord.
You know, what I'm saying is bigger than us. It's

(28:18):
bigger than us. And what you said today meant so much.
And unfortunately I learned that too little, too late in
the eyes of h when man says that you had
an opportunity. But see, thank god you said something else
today which really really helped me mentally to get myself

(28:40):
together and knowing.

Speaker 1 (28:41):
That it isn't about her, It's about what difference I'm
going to make am I gonna that cycle. Am I
gonna make that change? Am I going to be that?
Because I was caught up on listening to key Guy.
I was caught up on she didn't open her eyes

(29:01):
and I couldn't get to say goodbye, you know. And
oftentimes they're listeners out there listening to that, and they're like,
they probably go through the same thing, But it doesn't
mean that it's over. I still too can make.

Speaker 5 (29:17):
That change, like you said, And I thank you for
what you spoke life into me, because there's not a
data goes by that I don't miss my mother, but
I just wish we had a better relationship and that
I became that bigger person and made that difference.

Speaker 1 (29:37):
But it's not too late. Just because she transitioned not
mean right. And I thank you for all that you
said on that because there are people listening like myself
that have had turmoil after turmoil with their parents and
with no closure and on the level of earth, when

(30:00):
you're in there's no clothes, but we here are trying
to tell you listeners, and you spoke life to me,
and I'm speaking life that it's not over until you're
called home. You still yet have time to make a difference.
And though you couldn't even I couldn't say I'm sorry, Ma,

(30:23):
the things and like you said, the legacies you leave,
the little trinkets that you leave. No matter what your
parents' lifestyle was, you're making that different and you're changing
that generational curse. That's where that comes from, y'all. And
I'm thinking for feeding me with that because there's times

(30:46):
I'm normal, like most folks, you know, I fall short.
I'm like, listen, you know, I wish you know, I
always go back to it. I wish I could say
sorry to my mother and make a change, But you can.
I thought, because she close the eyes, that was the
end on you know what I'm saying. That was it?
But God, But God, but God. So as you as

(31:11):
you hear sis, I'm extremely transparent. I'm gonna tell you
and thank you because I asked God to allow me
to go places where most of the church folk will
go to make sure that people have and encounter with
what God's love is. It's unconditional, right yep. So that

(31:36):
means there's no condition, ah, that God's presence can't be
found as long as I'm in the world. Can we go, Hey, Hey,
because yeah, you know, big big September girl energy bick
rgo energy. Yes, God sent me. He sent me so

(31:56):
you could see my light and be curious about what
it is that's attracting you to me. Come on over
here so you can dip in this spiritual corner. Koche
of this fruit basket. I got Sitney, and that's today.
Do you need some joy? Here you go, boo? I
got some. Do you need some? Leave? I got you.

(32:18):
Do you need just just a little bit? You just
need somebody to be patient with you as you talk.
I've got you. I'm listening. I'm trained to listen. I'm
a certified mental health first statter. When I say I'm
here for you, boo boo, I mean that in every
aspect of the word, not only in the natural, but

(32:40):
also in the spiritual, because that's what God said, He
wants it both to be the lines up as it
is in the natural, as it is in the spiritual.
So I can't be anything less than what He predestined
me to be. And again that is a light and
dark place. M hm hm. Yes, that's a tall order,

(33:05):
all order. And you you bringing it, you bringing it,
and I just you know, God knows what to give
you when when you need it. Right.

Speaker 5 (33:13):
He needed me to feel the effects of this, this
into the and it touches me, you know because oftentimes,
you know, when we lose our parents, we just go there.

Speaker 1 (33:24):
There's that loneliness. There's that time where you just want
to I just would love to hear yell at me
for hear what I'm saying. I just want to hear
a voice sometime. You know, you know I'm saying, I'm
being real, you know what I'm saying. This, this is
this was our life. You know, we we we did
not have the most loving you know, it wasn't a
thing where you'd ever experienced my mother hugging on me.

(33:44):
But praise God, Praise God for a God that will
tape those stories and turn them around.

Speaker 5 (33:51):
And make them an uplifting and and and just uh
a way that you can move on from from level
to level and.

Speaker 1 (34:02):
In our lives. And like I said, I've been I
was blessed to have children where I can love on
them and and and not uh uh be you know
that disconnect.

Speaker 5 (34:15):
And I just blessed God that you know, he would
use us to be that curse breaker to and and
even if it doesn't happen in this time next to
maybe my child's come. You know, we're we're that total
toe uh breakdown, that that you're breaking, you know, breaking
those those chains, you know, so that we can we

(34:36):
can elevate and and go from level to level and
in God. And I tell you it's just I'm just
flabbergasted today, you know, on this hall, because it really
touches home for me, you know, because this just happened
to be one of the week I just missed.

Speaker 1 (34:52):
Mama. I'm mist for yelling, I mean hearing the you know,
going off on me. I love it, you know what
I'm saying. I love it now, you know in that
cool when she was here, you know, but you learned,
you learned that now we all have flaws. We all
have flaws. Amen, we all have Amen and Amen again

(35:12):
m hm. But yes, you know I'm with you, Sis.
I missed, you know, every every day, every year, on
my birthday, my phone don't ring. And I promise you,
every year, on my birthday, the first phone call I
get with my mama singing off keyp mmm, happy birthday,

(35:33):
said her baby. And she's reading and loud, strong and wrong.
But that was my song, and I was gonna get it. Okay,
that was bless God, bless gun. She said, strap and wrong,
go ahead, mine you better thing. She always knew I

(35:57):
was judging her because you know, I was acquired director.
So I got this ear. Yeah, I'm like, oh wow, okay, man,
do it. You love me clearly, and I'm gonna let
you do it because you love that. I'm not gonna
put you in the right key. No that's not that's
not the key. That's not the key. You know you

(36:19):
can you bring that down. It's sounds like you a
natural alphold on. Get out with the panel things and
get out of the panel thing, buddy, you fuddy. But
that that's literal is my is my friend. That is
my favorite fruit. Boy. Listen, and you know you're judged

(36:41):
by the fruit. Don't play, don't play, you tak you
sold food, always warned. Don't let it next to me
in church. Don't sit next to me in church. Is
all almost. Oh man, you are you are something. Let
me tell you these listeners will be a blessed listener.
You be a blessed man because she I love her personality.

(37:02):
She's so and I can honestly say, out of all
the interviews, I think you're like the closest that I
really say that you're like me. You know, we have
this kind of this comical thing we we we we
choose laughter to bring up about points that are just
so challenging most times, and I have to laugh to

(37:24):
keep from the crime most times. You know what I'm saying.
It's one of those mechanisms that work for me and
I have you know, it's not Oftentimes I find people
that go through the same kind of UH have that
same kind of characteristic, and I just thank you for
showcasing that on today, because that's what it's about. It's
about being real. It's about going from one UH level

(37:47):
to the next, you know, in him and however you
can do it. The key is to do it right.
That's the That's the main thing. I know.

Speaker 5 (37:57):
These listeners are listening and they saying, you know, the
question you know that that I most would ask of
you is that you your author? You you you're a creator.
You know what does it take now you we know
you're going through tests like everybody else to bring you
to the testimony, but but your your creative skills, what

(38:22):
what is it that you use, especially being a professional
in mental health. You know what tools would you give
to someone listening that could help them to go uh
to weather through a lot of storms that they're going through.

Speaker 1 (38:39):
Oh, write it down, because you know, even when you
don't think it's making any sense, write it down. You know,
many of us journal Now. I'm not going to sit
here and tell you our journal on a regular basis
because I'm on the move a lot. But what I
learned to do, thank God for technology, is I have

(38:59):
a collection of voice notes. I have a collection of
notes that I've written on my phone so I wouldn't
lose the thought. I discovered that those words eventually come
together and they make chapters. They make poetry when you

(39:19):
put them together. Right, Just write down your thoughts, write
down your feelings, because one day you are going to
go back and realize that it wasn't necessarily you writing it,
it was actually the Holy Spirit moving through your pen,
so you could really write the vision and make it plain.

(39:41):
Can we go there? Yeah? We send to go there
because a lot of times you don't know. You know,
I can't sit here and tell you I've had a blueprint. Yes,
I've been privileged to have some journalistic training. You know,
I was groomed to be a star. You know, come on,
I've been since I was in the third grade, singing

(40:05):
since I could walk, write it down and trust God
for the blueprint. Sometimes you do have to wait for
the blueprint to come out. But I promise you, if
you're prayerful and you're asking God to show you the way,

(40:25):
He's going to show you how to get him done.
Now in publishing this chapter that was published a couple
of years ago, you know, again, God orders your stuffs
and you land exactly where you need to land to
get things done at the appointed time. I was connected

(40:46):
to assistant during my grief process, and I actually became
a published auficor for the first time after the death
of my mother. Because you know, the Bible often talks about,
you know, in the Old Testament, because I'm an Old
Testament lover. Every time the Biblical greats went through something,

(41:06):
they would raise an altar and worship right. So this
chapter that was published was very therapeutic for me. It
was one of the hardest things I've ever written, because
I had to write out the story of my dirty
through foster care and some of the things you heard
come out of my mouth or written in this chapter,

(41:29):
and when people read it, they say it's raw. I
was connected with some people that helped me meeting up
and show me how to put these things in order.
And many of these things I had already written. I
just went in that bag of journals and read things
I wrote twenty and thirty years ago. I was like, wow,

(41:49):
I'm kind of profound. We're gonna use this. Those things
that you write, they become chapters. Those things that you write,
they become poems. Those things that you write, they become
lyrics that somebody can sing. It's not you yourself, write
it out. I even use writing as a tool with

(42:11):
my daughters when they hit teenage, because you know us
little girls, we go crazy when we hit a certain age.
So I've never been one to like to argue. I
always wanted to hear my children, so I would encourage
them when you feel like you can't talk to me
and you don't want to be, you know, privy to
my live response. There's this composition notebook laying year. Write

(42:36):
me in the letter and tell me to go get
the book when you're done, and I'll read it and
I'll write you back, Yeah, listen again. Biblical Bible study
taught me that we can provoke our children to raft,
and I don't. And I think people discount that. You know,

(42:57):
my studies taught me that, Yeah, sometimes what I say
I can upset my children. They have feelings. Though they're
not my friends, they're still worthy of some level of respect.
So I had to learn to speak to them where
one to be spoken to. So when you don't have
the words, when you know your tone is about to

(43:19):
get all your fronts knocked out, go ahead and write
it down. This way, we're not in here ingering and arguing. Yeah,
and to that. My oldest daughter is a musician. She's vocalist.
She has music all over SoundCloud. Shout out to miss

(43:40):
Missy my oh, my oldest baby. Yes she she listened
to her. Mama, you know what I'm saying. Gonna write
that out, put it in bars, express yourself musically inclined.
The youngest one is the artist, the painter mmm, and

(44:05):
she's very well spoken. So I just thought to them,
you should creative. Write it down. Please free you when
you go back and read it, I'll allow you look
at God that that's a word for those that are
sitting there and they, you know, might not. I wish

(44:26):
i'd have heard that from here in the past. I
could have wrote my mother, Mark, I would have wrote,
write a book, you know, and hope that you know,
because she loved to read, now that that she loved
that my mother could go through a book one of
them big paperback you know books, or in a day,
like an hour or two hours sometimes if the book

(44:47):
was good enough. So you know, she was a reader.
So that would have really been a blessing in our relationship.
And again, oftentimes you do you just hear these gems dropped,
like what you're doing.

Speaker 5 (44:58):
Right now that could have helped, but it can help
in other ways in other situations to better and make
a stronger impact on your future.

Speaker 1 (45:07):
You know. So I truly bless God for you. Well,
you know, I know you shouted out your daughters and stuff,
but you know, I got to let the folks know
how they can reach out to you. You have an
email that they can you can for a place that
you could have them tell them about your book. You
know where they can reach it, they can purchase it. Well,

(45:28):
the book is actually an anthology project ten women from
across the country, empowered by my very dear friend, doctor
Lamar Renee Sensor. The title of this book is the
Death and Diversity within Relationships. Let's talk about it. And
these women wrote some powerful, powerful pieces. And this book

(45:52):
can be purchased on Amazon. All right, gone all the
way to Amazon and get you a book. It doesn't
even cast you a lot. You're not gonna be broke
after you buy it. And if you take a look,
you will see that I also got cover design credit
for this project. If you would like to connect with

(46:14):
me because I'm creative, often referred to by my friend
circle as the creative Architects, you can reach me at
n V like Nancy Victor Yeah V Hansford my last
name at gmail dot com. If you would like to

(46:35):
connect with me and follow me on social media. I
am tilted underscore halo on all platforms. That's T Y
L T E D underscore halo h A L O.
Why is there hy as opposed to an I in tilted?
Because baby, I got questions? All right, you're amazed. You

(47:01):
said you're amazing. Oh my gosh, I love it. I
love this interview. Ooh I tell you you are just
amazing and such a blessing to listeners. You have truly,
truly been blessed by this wonderful sister. I tell you,
I'm just so blessed to you know, God will bring
you into my life to be a blessing and just

(47:23):
have me laughing and smiling. That's a beautiful thing, you know,
whenever someone put a smile on my face, so that
I thank you. Usually I'm trying to crack the jokes
and break up the monotony shot, but you you you
doing that on today, and I just bless God for you.
Thank you so much for all that you do. You
you have to if I asked you to leave, and

(47:47):
you know, looking at what we've been through, we didn't
weather through COVID and we didn't we're losing so many people,
Like I was just amazed at all the lost you
know that's going on here recently. You know, people just
going you know, they're leaving. What would be the one.

Speaker 5 (48:06):
Thing that you'd like to leave with the listeners in
regards to things.

Speaker 1 (48:11):
That they're going through. It could just be one word,
trust God. Fever two, trust God because he is who
he says he is. That's my testimony and I'm sticking

(48:34):
to it. Trust God because he is who he says
he is. He is truly the one that causes all
things to work together for our good. And that includes
the good, the bad, and the ugly. It works together

(48:56):
for our good if you trust trust him mhm, Praise God,
Praise God, trust him, trust them. You know, and you
know oftentime, you know we we we go through trials
and tribulations in life. Man, it's just hard some time

(49:16):
to let go and let God. That's the easy thing
for folks to say. But when you put to that
test that you are then in that place where you
have to be the bigger person and kind of mhm,
it's hard. It's hard. You've always been in control, when

(49:40):
you've been a single parent raising your kids all alone,
and you have the bread winner, and it's it's a
it's a tall ordissist. It's a tall listen. Listen. But
I told you, guys, my story, and I'm sticking to
it because let me tell you, as I was trusting value,

(50:00):
and I will be sitting in my rock and chair.
I keep a rocket chair, okay, because while I'm sitting
there rocking, you need to understand this. The whole conversation
going on between me and God, and early in the
morning especially, yeah, early in the morning. Now I'm gonna
seek you God. My daughter, my youngest daughter, used to
work overnight and we went through some things together. You know,

(50:24):
I've been a married mother, I've been a single mother twice.
That's a whole other conversation for another show. But we
will go through things. And she knew Mommy when Mommy
got in that chair something, what's happening. I'm looking. I'm
talking to God for direction because I don't know how
we're gonna do this. We gonna figure this out. My
baby got to see me pray. My baby got to

(50:45):
hear me pray. I got to teach her the importance
of knowing the scripture and how to pray God's words
so he hears and responds praying. Trust. When you don't
see the light, when you know that all the light

(51:06):
bulbs is burnt out and ain't gonna be no end
of this tunnel, you better sit back and pray and
listen for that still small voice, because I promise you
back in the days that I like to call it
my broke days, baby, let me talk to you about
how many ways I learned, how to make bread. I'm
telling you, Lily, God gave me the intrusted. I learned

(51:29):
how to make bread without milk. I learned how to
make bread without oil. I learned how I still have
my favorite make bread from scratch recipe and it's two ingredients,
I promise you. But see, only God could give you
that kind of direction on where to go, where to search,
and and all of a sudden I land and what
I need to produce for me and my child with

(51:52):
what I have access to. Who wouldn't serve a god
like this? Who wouldn't trust a God like this? That's cool,
and that's a tool order. He's showing you the ways
that you can.

Speaker 8 (52:07):
Make mead, baby, baby, Listen, many a day, baby, many
a day, I was going after the kitchen and be like, Okay,
I gotta go to the grocery store.

Speaker 1 (52:19):
And I know how much money I got in my hand,
and I just go. And you know, some of my
girlfriends have heard this story before, because I'm gonna keep
telling it. They encourage you. Or I would go in
front of my refrigerator and just start speaking in my
heaveny language. I will prophesy to my refrigerator. I will
prophesy to my pantry, and I will begin to praise

(52:41):
God in advance that I would get to the grocery
store Mini finding everything that I need on sale. You
preaching it, you you preaching, you preaching.

Speaker 8 (52:52):
We listen, We in that store right now, trying to
figure all these prices going to start.

Speaker 1 (52:58):
Going up because of this going on here. But you
know that, like you said, it's choosing Him and going
to Him for all your needs. And that's what we
have to remember. Listeners, you have been blessed by this
oldnointed woman of God. This to you, You're amazing. I
love your personality. I said this to you many times before.

(53:21):
Thank you, thank you, thank you for coming on this platform.
But we do nothing without going to the throne of God.
And I would again ask you to just pray us
our since and thanks, Oh heavenly Father. You are absolutely amazing,
and we give you glory, We give you praying, we
give you honor simply for being who you are. Father.

(53:46):
You have proven yourself time and time again to be
everything that we need. You are peace in the midst
of the storm. You are a mother to the motherless.
You are a father to the father list you are
a friend that sticketh closer to a brother. And for

(54:09):
this we give you praise, and we say things you have.
We list this prayer before your throne, and we thank you,
o God, that you connected us heart to heart and
breast and breast by our confession in our faith in
Jesus invice. And we thank you that we are now sisters,

(54:29):
and we are now brothers, and you have changed our
names from sinner to daughter, from daughter even to winter.
You are the one that causes us the wrong triumphally
and everything well, God, we say thanks you right now
that you continue to order ourselves. We say thank you
right now that you will continue to beat your holy

(54:51):
Shirah in our lives, providing each and every one of
our needs with ease, Old God, Because you own the
cattle of a thousand fields and every that belongs to you,
we have access to all we need. Doing that, So
right now, God, I ask that you would give us
some rest on tonight, that we will experience a supernatural

(55:12):
restoration on this evening like none we've experienced in a
long time. Father, you are great, and you are able
to do all things but fail. So we thank you
that you hold us and you keep us close to

(55:33):
your heart and as the apple of your eye. And
even as I live this prayer, it would be robbery
if I didn't say thank you for this woman of
God who lays her platform before you. I think you
will God, that you are answering her prayers, even prayer

(55:54):
she don't know she needs to prayer. I thank you
that you are giving her answers now, and you are
making ways out of no way, and that you are
showing her illuminating the doors that she needs to walk
to through to accomplish that which you've predestined her to do.
I thank you that you'll continue to keep her body

(56:15):
healed messing in Jesus' name, and I thank you for
even the conversation she'll have with you about what was
discussed on this platform on tonight. Take her to higher
heights in you, Jesus. Thank you, and I say thank you,

(56:35):
and I feel this prayer in proclaiming and it is
so in Jesus' name. Amen.

Speaker 5 (56:44):
Amen, Amen says look amazing, amazing, you are woman of God.
Thank you for blessing and listening listeners, you have just
been blessed by this wonderful, wonderful woman of God Nikita,
I love you, God bless you.

Speaker 1 (57:02):
I just want to thank Positive Power twenty one just
for having me on this day. Thank you Jerry Royce
my Batman on the tech Tip, and I just thank
you for having me. Come every Tuesday at nine pm
Eastern standing time, and we have an open door policy,
so we're gonna bring the camp back. We're gonna bring
her back here or just so that she go, oh

(57:27):
my God, bless you. I love you, said God, bless you.
I love you too.

Speaker 3 (57:39):
M The testimony, the testimony, The testimony with Paula.

Speaker 9 (58:12):
Briony, the Diva for Christday, Wattle.

Speaker 3 (58:23):
Tuning every Tuesday and nine he's since then the time
you are listening to the testimony with Hostel Aka Deep
before crime An.

Speaker 4 (58:40):
In case you don't know what that stands for, it's
divinely inspired vessel appointed and anointed for a time such
as this.

Speaker 1 (58:50):
Hey, every Tuesday at nine pm Eastern. You don't want
to miss speaker. Oh now come now, smo now, som
o now Yeah, my podcast

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DA TESTIMONY WITH PAULA BRION #116 w/ Nikita Hansford | Adult Mental Health Advisor, Author, Life Coach

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}DA TESTIMONY WITH PAULA BRION #116 w/ Nikita Hansford | Adult Mental Health Advisor, Author, Life Coach