June 25, 2025 • 28 mins
We live in a world that tries to divide us, compare us, and keep us silent. But today’s episode is about lifting each other up, not just in moments of triumph, but through the valleys, the breakthroughs, and the everyday in between. We’re talking about Strength in Sisterhood. And I want you to lean in because this message is going to stir something in your spirit.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:06):
Hello, everyone, Thank you so much for joining me for
Daily Spark with Doctor Angela. I'm your host, Doctor Angela,
but it's Chester. You guys know who I am, and
you know what I like to do on the shows.
Say it with me. I want to enlighten, inspire, and
empower you to become your best self. Now, Scripture reminds
us that the tongue is a small thing that makes
(00:27):
grand speeches, but a tony spark can set a great
forest on a fire. And that's what we want to
do today. We want to get you fired up about
our topic today. We are talking about strength in sisterhood.
That's right, voices of a victory. So you know what
I'm gonna tell you to do. Go get comfy, get cozy,
(00:50):
get your coffee or get your tea, because we are
about to get started. Hello, Hello, Hello, thank you everyone
for joining me here on Daily's Spark with Doctor Angela.
I am so glad to have you join me. Be
that it is good morning, good afternoon, or good evening
wherever you are in the world, I am so glad
(01:11):
that you are here with me. Welcome, Welcome, Welcome. Now
i'd like to think of Daily's Mark with Doctor Angela
as one of those places where we can come together,
sit around the table, if you will, with our coffee
or with our tea, and have a nice, good old
chit chat about the things that are going on in
(01:32):
the world and how we can best make sure that
we are living to be our best selves. With that
being said, we are talking about focusing on the things
that often get overlooked, but they are so powerful, and
that is our connections and our conversations that we have
(01:57):
with other women. So sorry, guys, I don't mean to
leave you guys out this time, but I do want
to make sure that you say you're welcome to listen in.
But I want to make sure that I give some
kudos to my fellow women out there today, so we
(02:17):
know that we all live in a world that tries
to divide us, that tries to compare us, and even
sometimes keep us silent in a negative way. But today's
episode is about lifting each other up, not just in
moments of triumph, but through the valleys, through the breakups,
(02:44):
through the hard times, the disappointments, and in the every
day in betweens. We're talking about strength in our sisterhoods,
and I want you to kind of lean in today
because this message is going to stir something perhaps in
(03:05):
your spirit after you listen today, Please feel free to
find this. I know this is radio, but if you would,
please find this on your favorite streaming platform as well,
and then share it out to your community, to your tribe.
(03:25):
Let's encourage one another today in a positive way. So
what are some things that we can do? And why
does sisterhood matter in the first place. I'm so glad
that you asked. Sisterhood isn't just a circle of friends.
(03:46):
Sisterhood is a covering. It's a spiritual, emotional, and sacred
space that we have continued to not only carve out
for ourselves, but one that we honor for not only
(04:06):
the women who have gone before us, not just for ourselves,
not just for our daughters, but for our grand great
daughters as well. We find that this is a place
that is deeply necessary, not just needed, but necessary. It
(04:30):
helps us process, It helps us stay grounded, but more importantly,
it helps us make sure that we are staying accountable
to our faith. When women come together with authenticity and accountability,
something wholly happens, something special happens. In that space. We
(04:55):
exchange shame for strength, we do away with comparison and
instead we act out of celebration. When we take that perspective,
we find that our sisterhoods are able to really flourish
(05:16):
and grow. So, of course we have to ask ourselves
questions to make sure that we are doing and being
at our best selves. So let's start with some reflection. Questions.
First would be who are the women that speak life
(05:37):
into you? Now? What I mean by that is, who
are the women that are always speaking a word of
encouragement to you and over you? Now, sure, we have
our friends that have conversations with us and simply talk
with us. We need them, we love them. We also
(06:00):
need to have those women that every time we see them,
they are saying something positive, They are saying something powerful,
and they're speaking it to us, for us and with us.
Who are those women? Make sure you are aware of
(06:22):
who they are and don't take them for granted. Sure,
can it be tiring sometimes thinking like, Wow, she's always
so positive and she's always being encouraging. Girl, I don't
have time for that. The real life is going on,
and I feel you know, bad, bad, bad bad bad. Absolutely,
(06:44):
that is a part of being human. But there's nothing
wrong with the person who chooses to combat the toxicity,
the negativity, the uncertainty, the lack of confidence with something
that is confident, with something that is bold, with something
(07:04):
that is sure, with words that remind you of who
you are and whose you are. We must protect these
women at all costs. We must make sure that they
continue to thrive and grow and guess what, we need
to also speak life into their lives as well. Second
(07:26):
question you should ask yourself do I have relationships that
stretch me and bless me? Yep, that's a good question.
I know. I can see you nod in your head like, humm,
I haven't asked that in a while. I know. That's
why I'm here today to remind you. Do you have
(07:48):
relationships that stretch you? And do you have relationships that
bless you? So who are the women that speak life
into you? And do you have relationship and ships that
stretch you and bless you? The third is are you
allowing yourself to be seen by your sisters or are
(08:11):
you hiding behind your strength? I know I didn't mean
to ask a heavy question there, but it's important. Nonetheless,
so many times, unfortunately, we feel that we must din
dim our light in order to let others shine. That
(08:32):
should not be the case in your sisterhoods. You should
be able to shine as brightly as God would have
you shine, and there be no ill will towards you.
I am so glad that I am afforded that in
a sisterhood of the women that I call my family.
(08:56):
And you guys know who you are. You know we
have together, We have text each other randomly, on purpose,
with intention. We can sit in silence amongst ourselves and
be okay in the quiet. But we can also laugh
(09:19):
and be silly together and that be okay too. Thank
you for allowing us to just be us. So as
you are reflecting, I want you to ask yourself, are
you allowing yourself that type of sisterhood? If not, that's
(09:44):
something that you could change, something that you can address. Ladies,
we should just be ourselves today, whatever that means. If
that's like no lipstick or just lip gloss, or no shoes,
just socks, how about no blouses but just T shirts right,
(10:05):
like not business casual, but just jeans and T shirts,
just comfy, cozy. Just watch a silly movie. It doesn't
have to be one that's gonna teach us something. It's
just okay to just be those other type of sister
groups that we need as well. We need professional ones,
(10:26):
we need faith ones, but we also just need sister
sisterhoods as well. So let me remind you this way.
Ecclesiastes four nine and ten says two people are better
off than one, for they can help each other succeed.
(10:50):
If one person fails, the other can reach out and help.
But someone who falls alone is in trouble. See, even
Jesus surrounded himself with both intimacy and community, with real
(11:12):
friendly groups, you know, the Disciples, the guys they were there.
That was his intimate friend group, if you will, and
also with community, those that were friends of friends, those
that were church members, as we may say, church family.
(11:34):
But in each circle in which he moved, he knew
what circle he was in. His inner circle was intentional,
the guys one hundred purposeful, and your sisterhoods should be too.
Be mindful, be aware, because you too, sister, have the
(11:59):
mind of Christ. So you don't need a crowd, but
you do need a core, a few God ordained women
who don't just clap in your public winds, but they
check on you with your private wounds. They don't just
(12:21):
applaud when their name is called in your thank you statement,
but they smile when they see you online as though
you were sitting or standing right next to them. They
cheer for your kids as though they were their own.
You know what I mean. If you walk in and
(12:43):
you're so happy to see them, and you hug them
as though you haven't seen them in years and it's
only about a few weeks or maybe a few months, Yep,
those are your people. Don't forget about them, don't leave
them to the side, but make sure that they know
that they are left. Well. Everyone, It is time for
(13:08):
us to take a very short break, but don't you worry.
We are going to continue this conversation. We'll be back
right after this. And we are back. Thank you so
much for joining me for Daily Spark with Doctor Angela.
I'm your host, doctri Angela Budgetester. Today we are talking
(13:32):
about strength and sisterhood. Don't worry, guys, you're welcome to
join in and listen. Just because we're talking about sisterhood
doesn't mean that you can't join us for the chit chat. So,
what are some things that we can do we can
really build healthy connections first and foremost, what can we
(13:52):
do to make sure that we're doing that? We can
make sure that we are building healthy connections. I want
you to think of the shift in the conversation this way.
Let's keep things honest, let's keep things transparent, Let's always
be real with ourselves. So not every relationship that we
(14:15):
have with another woman has been a healthy relationship. And
you know which ones I'm talking about, Yeah, those right, Like,
you can't even imagine why you put yourself in that situation, right,
but now that you have lived through it, you have
what gained wisdom, knowledge, understanding, and now you are wiser
(14:37):
having survived it. But you also know that you will
no longer put yourself in that position again. And so
many women carry the hurt from that betrayal, the hurt
from that jealousy, the hurt from that silence with them
wherever they go. Well, it is now time to heal
(15:00):
that wound and to have some support where you need
that support. So God can heal even that. So let
me just put that out there for you to remember.
So God can heal even that. And when we do
the work of showing up and being our authentic selves
(15:24):
and having open and honest conversations with ourselves with God.
Then we create a space for that restoration. We create
a space that is more than just survival. But you
create a place in which you can thrive as your
authentic self. I know you hear it all the time.
(15:45):
I don't want you to just survive. I want you
to thrive. And it's say, what does that even mean?
It means learning to understand what caused your pain in
the first place, where were you hurt, where were you harmed?
And how can you make yourself whole again? And it
(16:08):
all starts with having that honest conversation with your self.
Many times it also ends in having to realize that
I'm not going to be in that circle as often
as I used to be because that circle just isn't
(16:29):
as healthy as it used to be or as it
could be for me. So, with that being said, because
you still love them or like them, or you care
about them in some way, shape or form, and you
don't want, you know, you don't want them totally completely
out of your life, but you do realize that spending
more than filling the time you know there, spending more
(16:50):
than an hour with them is not what you need
to be doing at this stage of your life. Right,
So just being aware of what you need to do.
Let me give you three keys to actually experiencing a
more healthy sisterhood. Number one is intentional communication. Having intentional
(17:13):
communication means that you say what you mean, You mean
what you say, you ask for what you need. You
ask them what they need. You don't make your sisters guess,
and you give them what they need so that they
don't have to guess about you. So everything is reciprocal, right,
(17:36):
So say what you mean. They will say what they mean,
but ask if you do not know, give the information
that they need to know in order to help you.
Don't make your sister's guess. We are not mind readers.
So anything that you would say to yourself sometimes you
(17:57):
may need to say to your sister group. Right, Hey,
you guys, I'm really not feeling it today. I don't
think that I should, like, you know, come out and
hang out with you guys, because I'm just feeling just
blah today. I'll see you on Saturday, I'll see you tomorrow,
whatever day. Right, But if the sister group says, oh, no,
guess what, we're all kind of feeling not really good today,
(18:19):
Why don't we get together and we can cheer each
other up. We can all have some tea, we can
watch a movie, or we can go out to eat
and we can, you know, kind of soothe each other. Okay,
you never know what can happen when you're open and honest,
So say what you need and allow each person their space.
(18:43):
You can always suggest an alternative, but if they say no,
then also respect them enough to give them what they
say that they need. So why is that important? Because sometimes,
let's be honest, you have those people who don't want
to invite themselves. They want you to invite them, so
(19:04):
they're gonna say, I don't know you guys, I think
I might want to stay home because they want someone
in the group to say, but we can't possibly do
it without you. We wouldn't have as much fun. You
know that type of statement, right, They want to hear that,
And because they want to hear that, they're going to
present in a way that allows you to give them
(19:26):
what they need by making that statement. If you have
a friend in your friend group like that, and you
don't mind being the person that reassures them, then give
them what they need. If you are that person in
the friend group, make sure you're not wearing that thin
because sometimes that can cause people to think that you
(19:47):
are putting yourself a little bit ahead of the group.
So just be mindful and be aware. Okay. Number two
is honest accountability. Honest accountability is so important. It is
a real sisterhood moment that can connect you in a
(20:09):
very loving way. If everyone in your circle only tells
you what you want to hear, it's not a sisterhood.
It's an echo chamber. Okay, there's one thing about true sisters.
They are going to tell you about yourself, even if
(20:29):
you don't want to hear it. They're going to tell you, right.
So it's like, don't ask your sister group if you
don't want to know the truth. So there are good
sister groups and bad sister groups with that though, right,
we have some people that are going to tell you
the truth in love with grace. But you're also going
(20:53):
to have some folks that are going to tell you
the truth with a little undercut of malice or brassness.
That isn't what you need, and you have to be
careful of that. Even though they're telling you the truth.
You may not like their delivery style, and if that
is important for you, if that is something that you
need to have in a particular style, a particular tone,
(21:16):
then ask the person who's going to give it to
you the way in which you can receive it, because
let's be honest, even if you're telling the truth, if
you say it in a way that it cannot be
received by that person, you didn't really say it because
they couldn't receive it, so it just bounced off of them,
you know. So let's try to give each other what
(21:38):
the other needs in order to allow them the space
to accept it, roll around in it a little bit,
and then take it and run with it and become
the best that they can be. Number three is spirit
led support. And not every battle needs to have advice,
(22:01):
but sometimes you just need someone to sit and pray
with you. Everything is not you know, this guy is
falling type of thing. Sometimes it is just a matter
of uncertainty. You just need to hear more or more
clearly from God in those moments. Just say again what
it is you need, and that friend, that one friend
(22:22):
that you know truly that's gonna pray with you and
for you. Make sure that they're aware of what's going on,
and they might even invite you over for some coffee R.
S and T and we'll definitely have some prayer time
with you. So make sure, my dear sisterhoods, that you
guys are having real talk moments. I remember a time
(22:46):
when I almost pulled away from a friendship group because
I felt a little bit misunderstood. But what I learned
was that communication before assumption can save a connection. It's
when I found out that they were speaking from misinformation
(23:10):
that I was able to actually correct that misinformation, which
gave them a totally different perspective. And in giving them
the new perspective with the actual facts, they too were
able to come to a different point of view and
the whole conversation changed. So sometimes it is not that
(23:34):
someone is trying to be malicious or that they are
trying to speak ill of another, but they may not
have the actual factuals right. They may not know exactly
what's going on, So make sure that everyone is aware
and everyone has the truth. Victory comes when we fight
(23:56):
for each other, not when we fight with each other,
all right, So fight beside your sister, not you know,
trying to trample over her. Make sure that you are
aware of where you are in the fight that you
are trying to lead. So what are some questions that
(24:17):
you could ask yourself for your journal prompt? I want
to give you one, and that is, is there a
conversation you need to have with a sister in your life?
Is there a conversation? Now, I'm not saying that it's
a bad conversation or a heated conversation. It could be
a soft conversation, a reassuring conversation. But are there words
(24:42):
that need to be spoken to a sister in your sisterhood.
If so, make sure that you give that some thought,
you think it through, and you prepare your heart and
mind to have that conversation with her, especially if it's
something where you're asking for forgiveness, or you're asking to
(25:04):
be heard, or perhaps you're simply asking for to hit
the reset button. That your life has just gotten a
little crazy, a little wonky a little bit, and you were,
you know, like angry, you know, and you didn't mean
to be that way, and let her know, you know,
I'm sorry, I apologize, I didn't mean to do that.
(25:26):
And I want to make sure that we are okay
because there's nothing more important than us being okay. And
you know, not every person is meant to be our
forever friend, but those who are. We should nurture those
relationships and make sure that we are being the best
(25:46):
that we can be so that those sister groups can
be the best that they can be. So activate your village.
Sisterhood isn't just about those who are around you. It
is about you becoming your best and becoming a part
of the women that you walk with, and walking with
(26:09):
the women who walk with you. Victory doesn't always sound
like a shout. Sometimes it sounds like a whisper. Sometimes
it is the simple reassurance of I'm with you, I'm here,
I'm praying for you, I see you. Sometimes it is
(26:34):
a simple statement of I believe in you, wherever you are,
whatever you're doing, and don't forget that I love you.
Our sisterhoods are important and without them we may not
be the women that we are today, So don't take
them for granted. So before the day is over, reaffirm
(26:59):
or a firm in the first place a woman that
is special to you in your life, Text her, call her,
sender a prayer or pray with her. Allow someone to
show up for you. Don't pretend that you're okay if
you're not, allow your sister to be your sister in
(27:23):
the sisterhood. Thank you everyone for spending time with me
here today on Daily Spark with Doctor Angela. I hope
that I have once again enlightened, inspired, and empowered you
to be your best self as always made. The Lord
continue to shine his face upon you. May you receive
his grace and his mercy in all that you do.
(27:44):
Until next time, everyone remember that you you are blessed
in the Lord. Have a great day everyone, Goodbye,
Hello, everyone, Thank you so much for joining me for
Daily Spark with Doctor Angela. I'm your host, Doctor Angela,
but it's Chester. You guys know who I am, and
you know what I like to do on the shows.
Say it with me. I want to enlighten, inspire, and
empower you to become your best self. Now, Scripture reminds
us that the tongue is a small thing that makes
(00:27):
grand speeches, but a tony spark can set a great
forest on a fire. And that's what we want to
do today. We want to get you fired up about
our topic today. We are talking about strength in sisterhood.
That's right, voices of a victory. So you know what
I'm gonna tell you to do. Go get comfy, get cozy,
(00:50):
get your coffee or get your tea, because we are
about to get started. Hello, Hello, Hello, thank you everyone
for joining me here on Daily's Spark with Doctor Angela.
I am so glad to have you join me. Be
that it is good morning, good afternoon, or good evening
wherever you are in the world, I am so glad
(01:11):
that you are here with me. Welcome, Welcome, Welcome. Now
i'd like to think of Daily's Mark with Doctor Angela
as one of those places where we can come together,
sit around the table, if you will, with our coffee
or with our tea, and have a nice, good old
chit chat about the things that are going on in
(01:32):
the world and how we can best make sure that
we are living to be our best selves. With that
being said, we are talking about focusing on the things
that often get overlooked, but they are so powerful, and
that is our connections and our conversations that we have
(01:57):
with other women. So sorry, guys, I don't mean to
leave you guys out this time, but I do want
to make sure that you say you're welcome to listen in.
But I want to make sure that I give some
kudos to my fellow women out there today, so we
(02:17):
know that we all live in a world that tries
to divide us, that tries to compare us, and even
sometimes keep us silent in a negative way. But today's
episode is about lifting each other up, not just in
moments of triumph, but through the valleys, through the breakups,
(02:44):
through the hard times, the disappointments, and in the every
day in betweens. We're talking about strength in our sisterhoods,
and I want you to kind of lean in today
because this message is going to stir something perhaps in
(03:05):
your spirit after you listen today, Please feel free to
find this. I know this is radio, but if you would,
please find this on your favorite streaming platform as well,
and then share it out to your community, to your tribe.
(03:25):
Let's encourage one another today in a positive way. So
what are some things that we can do? And why
does sisterhood matter in the first place. I'm so glad
that you asked. Sisterhood isn't just a circle of friends.
(03:46):
Sisterhood is a covering. It's a spiritual, emotional, and sacred
space that we have continued to not only carve out
for ourselves, but one that we honor for not only
(04:06):
the women who have gone before us, not just for ourselves,
not just for our daughters, but for our grand great
daughters as well. We find that this is a place
that is deeply necessary, not just needed, but necessary. It
(04:30):
helps us process, It helps us stay grounded, but more importantly,
it helps us make sure that we are staying accountable
to our faith. When women come together with authenticity and accountability,
something wholly happens, something special happens. In that space. We
(04:55):
exchange shame for strength, we do away with comparison and
instead we act out of celebration. When we take that perspective,
we find that our sisterhoods are able to really flourish
(05:16):
and grow. So, of course we have to ask ourselves
questions to make sure that we are doing and being
at our best selves. So let's start with some reflection. Questions.
First would be who are the women that speak life
(05:37):
into you? Now? What I mean by that is, who
are the women that are always speaking a word of
encouragement to you and over you? Now, sure, we have
our friends that have conversations with us and simply talk
with us. We need them, we love them. We also
(06:00):
need to have those women that every time we see them,
they are saying something positive, They are saying something powerful,
and they're speaking it to us, for us and with us.
Who are those women? Make sure you are aware of
(06:22):
who they are and don't take them for granted. Sure,
can it be tiring sometimes thinking like, Wow, she's always
so positive and she's always being encouraging. Girl, I don't
have time for that. The real life is going on,
and I feel you know, bad, bad, bad bad bad. Absolutely,
(06:44):
that is a part of being human. But there's nothing
wrong with the person who chooses to combat the toxicity,
the negativity, the uncertainty, the lack of confidence with something
that is confident, with something that is bold, with something
(07:04):
that is sure, with words that remind you of who
you are and whose you are. We must protect these
women at all costs. We must make sure that they
continue to thrive and grow and guess what, we need
to also speak life into their lives as well. Second
(07:26):
question you should ask yourself do I have relationships that
stretch me and bless me? Yep, that's a good question.
I know. I can see you nod in your head like, humm,
I haven't asked that in a while. I know. That's
why I'm here today to remind you. Do you have
(07:48):
relationships that stretch you? And do you have relationships that
bless you? So who are the women that speak life
into you? And do you have relationship and ships that
stretch you and bless you? The third is are you
allowing yourself to be seen by your sisters or are
(08:11):
you hiding behind your strength? I know I didn't mean
to ask a heavy question there, but it's important. Nonetheless,
so many times, unfortunately, we feel that we must din
dim our light in order to let others shine. That
(08:32):
should not be the case in your sisterhoods. You should
be able to shine as brightly as God would have
you shine, and there be no ill will towards you.
I am so glad that I am afforded that in
a sisterhood of the women that I call my family.
(08:56):
And you guys know who you are. You know we
have together, We have text each other randomly, on purpose,
with intention. We can sit in silence amongst ourselves and
be okay in the quiet. But we can also laugh
(09:19):
and be silly together and that be okay too. Thank
you for allowing us to just be us. So as
you are reflecting, I want you to ask yourself, are
you allowing yourself that type of sisterhood? If not, that's
(09:44):
something that you could change, something that you can address. Ladies,
we should just be ourselves today, whatever that means. If
that's like no lipstick or just lip gloss, or no shoes,
just socks, how about no blouses but just T shirts right,
(10:05):
like not business casual, but just jeans and T shirts,
just comfy, cozy. Just watch a silly movie. It doesn't
have to be one that's gonna teach us something. It's
just okay to just be those other type of sister
groups that we need as well. We need professional ones,
(10:26):
we need faith ones, but we also just need sister
sisterhoods as well. So let me remind you this way.
Ecclesiastes four nine and ten says two people are better
off than one, for they can help each other succeed.
(10:50):
If one person fails, the other can reach out and help.
But someone who falls alone is in trouble. See, even
Jesus surrounded himself with both intimacy and community, with real
(11:12):
friendly groups, you know, the Disciples, the guys they were there.
That was his intimate friend group, if you will, and
also with community, those that were friends of friends, those
that were church members, as we may say, church family.
(11:34):
But in each circle in which he moved, he knew
what circle he was in. His inner circle was intentional,
the guys one hundred purposeful, and your sisterhoods should be too.
Be mindful, be aware, because you too, sister, have the
(11:59):
mind of Christ. So you don't need a crowd, but
you do need a core, a few God ordained women
who don't just clap in your public winds, but they
check on you with your private wounds. They don't just
(12:21):
applaud when their name is called in your thank you statement,
but they smile when they see you online as though
you were sitting or standing right next to them. They
cheer for your kids as though they were their own.
You know what I mean. If you walk in and
(12:43):
you're so happy to see them, and you hug them
as though you haven't seen them in years and it's
only about a few weeks or maybe a few months, Yep,
those are your people. Don't forget about them, don't leave
them to the side, but make sure that they know
that they are left. Well. Everyone, It is time for
(13:08):
us to take a very short break, but don't you worry.
We are going to continue this conversation. We'll be back
right after this. And we are back. Thank you so
much for joining me for Daily Spark with Doctor Angela.
I'm your host, doctri Angela Budgetester. Today we are talking
(13:32):
about strength and sisterhood. Don't worry, guys, you're welcome to
join in and listen. Just because we're talking about sisterhood
doesn't mean that you can't join us for the chit chat. So,
what are some things that we can do we can
really build healthy connections first and foremost, what can we
(13:52):
do to make sure that we're doing that? We can
make sure that we are building healthy connections. I want
you to think of the shift in the conversation this way.
Let's keep things honest, let's keep things transparent, Let's always
be real with ourselves. So not every relationship that we
(14:15):
have with another woman has been a healthy relationship. And
you know which ones I'm talking about, Yeah, those right, Like,
you can't even imagine why you put yourself in that situation, right,
but now that you have lived through it, you have
what gained wisdom, knowledge, understanding, and now you are wiser
(14:37):
having survived it. But you also know that you will
no longer put yourself in that position again. And so
many women carry the hurt from that betrayal, the hurt
from that jealousy, the hurt from that silence with them
wherever they go. Well, it is now time to heal
(15:00):
that wound and to have some support where you need
that support. So God can heal even that. So let
me just put that out there for you to remember.
So God can heal even that. And when we do
the work of showing up and being our authentic selves
(15:24):
and having open and honest conversations with ourselves with God.
Then we create a space for that restoration. We create
a space that is more than just survival. But you
create a place in which you can thrive as your
authentic self. I know you hear it all the time.
(15:45):
I don't want you to just survive. I want you
to thrive. And it's say, what does that even mean?
It means learning to understand what caused your pain in
the first place, where were you hurt, where were you harmed?
And how can you make yourself whole again? And it
(16:08):
all starts with having that honest conversation with your self.
Many times it also ends in having to realize that
I'm not going to be in that circle as often
as I used to be because that circle just isn't
(16:29):
as healthy as it used to be or as it
could be for me. So, with that being said, because
you still love them or like them, or you care
about them in some way, shape or form, and you
don't want, you know, you don't want them totally completely
out of your life, but you do realize that spending
more than filling the time you know there, spending more
(16:50):
than an hour with them is not what you need
to be doing at this stage of your life. Right,
So just being aware of what you need to do.
Let me give you three keys to actually experiencing a
more healthy sisterhood. Number one is intentional communication. Having intentional
(17:13):
communication means that you say what you mean, You mean
what you say, you ask for what you need. You
ask them what they need. You don't make your sisters guess,
and you give them what they need so that they
don't have to guess about you. So everything is reciprocal, right,
(17:36):
So say what you mean. They will say what they mean,
but ask if you do not know, give the information
that they need to know in order to help you.
Don't make your sister's guess. We are not mind readers.
So anything that you would say to yourself sometimes you
(17:57):
may need to say to your sister group. Right, Hey,
you guys, I'm really not feeling it today. I don't
think that I should, like, you know, come out and
hang out with you guys, because I'm just feeling just
blah today. I'll see you on Saturday, I'll see you tomorrow,
whatever day. Right, But if the sister group says, oh, no,
guess what, we're all kind of feeling not really good today,
(18:19):
Why don't we get together and we can cheer each
other up. We can all have some tea, we can
watch a movie, or we can go out to eat
and we can, you know, kind of soothe each other. Okay,
you never know what can happen when you're open and honest,
So say what you need and allow each person their space.
(18:43):
You can always suggest an alternative, but if they say no,
then also respect them enough to give them what they
say that they need. So why is that important? Because sometimes,
let's be honest, you have those people who don't want
to invite themselves. They want you to invite them, so
(19:04):
they're gonna say, I don't know you guys, I think
I might want to stay home because they want someone
in the group to say, but we can't possibly do
it without you. We wouldn't have as much fun. You
know that type of statement, right, They want to hear that,
And because they want to hear that, they're going to
present in a way that allows you to give them
(19:26):
what they need by making that statement. If you have
a friend in your friend group like that, and you
don't mind being the person that reassures them, then give
them what they need. If you are that person in
the friend group, make sure you're not wearing that thin
because sometimes that can cause people to think that you
(19:47):
are putting yourself a little bit ahead of the group.
So just be mindful and be aware. Okay. Number two
is honest accountability. Honest accountability is so important. It is
a real sisterhood moment that can connect you in a
(20:09):
very loving way. If everyone in your circle only tells
you what you want to hear, it's not a sisterhood.
It's an echo chamber. Okay, there's one thing about true sisters.
They are going to tell you about yourself, even if
(20:29):
you don't want to hear it. They're going to tell you, right.
So it's like, don't ask your sister group if you
don't want to know the truth. So there are good
sister groups and bad sister groups with that though, right,
we have some people that are going to tell you
the truth in love with grace. But you're also going
(20:53):
to have some folks that are going to tell you
the truth with a little undercut of malice or brassness.
That isn't what you need, and you have to be
careful of that. Even though they're telling you the truth.
You may not like their delivery style, and if that
is important for you, if that is something that you
need to have in a particular style, a particular tone,
(21:16):
then ask the person who's going to give it to
you the way in which you can receive it, because
let's be honest, even if you're telling the truth, if
you say it in a way that it cannot be
received by that person, you didn't really say it because
they couldn't receive it, so it just bounced off of them,
you know. So let's try to give each other what
(21:38):
the other needs in order to allow them the space
to accept it, roll around in it a little bit,
and then take it and run with it and become
the best that they can be. Number three is spirit
led support. And not every battle needs to have advice,
(22:01):
but sometimes you just need someone to sit and pray
with you. Everything is not you know, this guy is
falling type of thing. Sometimes it is just a matter
of uncertainty. You just need to hear more or more
clearly from God in those moments. Just say again what
it is you need, and that friend, that one friend
(22:22):
that you know truly that's gonna pray with you and
for you. Make sure that they're aware of what's going on,
and they might even invite you over for some coffee R.
S and T and we'll definitely have some prayer time
with you. So make sure, my dear sisterhoods, that you
guys are having real talk moments. I remember a time
(22:46):
when I almost pulled away from a friendship group because
I felt a little bit misunderstood. But what I learned
was that communication before assumption can save a connection. It's
when I found out that they were speaking from misinformation
(23:10):
that I was able to actually correct that misinformation, which
gave them a totally different perspective. And in giving them
the new perspective with the actual facts, they too were
able to come to a different point of view and
the whole conversation changed. So sometimes it is not that
(23:34):
someone is trying to be malicious or that they are
trying to speak ill of another, but they may not
have the actual factuals right. They may not know exactly
what's going on, So make sure that everyone is aware
and everyone has the truth. Victory comes when we fight
(23:56):
for each other, not when we fight with each other,
all right, So fight beside your sister, not you know,
trying to trample over her. Make sure that you are
aware of where you are in the fight that you
are trying to lead. So what are some questions that
(24:17):
you could ask yourself for your journal prompt? I want
to give you one, and that is, is there a
conversation you need to have with a sister in your life?
Is there a conversation? Now, I'm not saying that it's
a bad conversation or a heated conversation. It could be
a soft conversation, a reassuring conversation. But are there words
(24:42):
that need to be spoken to a sister in your sisterhood.
If so, make sure that you give that some thought,
you think it through, and you prepare your heart and
mind to have that conversation with her, especially if it's
something where you're asking for forgiveness, or you're asking to
(25:04):
be heard, or perhaps you're simply asking for to hit
the reset button. That your life has just gotten a
little crazy, a little wonky a little bit, and you were,
you know, like angry, you know, and you didn't mean
to be that way, and let her know, you know,
I'm sorry, I apologize, I didn't mean to do that.
(25:26):
And I want to make sure that we are okay
because there's nothing more important than us being okay. And
you know, not every person is meant to be our
forever friend, but those who are. We should nurture those
relationships and make sure that we are being the best
(25:46):
that we can be so that those sister groups can
be the best that they can be. So activate your village.
Sisterhood isn't just about those who are around you. It
is about you becoming your best and becoming a part
of the women that you walk with, and walking with
(26:09):
the women who walk with you. Victory doesn't always sound
like a shout. Sometimes it sounds like a whisper. Sometimes
it is the simple reassurance of I'm with you, I'm here,
I'm praying for you, I see you. Sometimes it is
(26:34):
a simple statement of I believe in you, wherever you are,
whatever you're doing, and don't forget that I love you.
Our sisterhoods are important and without them we may not
be the women that we are today, So don't take
them for granted. So before the day is over, reaffirm
(26:59):
or a firm in the first place a woman that
is special to you in your life, Text her, call her,
sender a prayer or pray with her. Allow someone to
show up for you. Don't pretend that you're okay if
you're not, allow your sister to be your sister in
(27:23):
the sisterhood. Thank you everyone for spending time with me
here today on Daily Spark with Doctor Angela. I hope
that I have once again enlightened, inspired, and empowered you
to be your best self as always made. The Lord
continue to shine his face upon you. May you receive
his grace and his mercy in all that you do.
(27:44):
Until next time, everyone remember that you you are blessed
in the Lord. Have a great day everyone, Goodbye,
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