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April 20, 2023 • 25 mins
Where It All Began...

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This Incredible Story Is Written By: David Holley.
Title: The Story Teller. Exclusive to the DMTForestOfFEAR Channel.

Intense & Magical Music With Permission of: Tanner Stokes Title: Black Matter. Link:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCUUU... Long Note Two by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution licence (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) Source: http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100418 Artist: http://incompetech.com/ Unseen Horrors Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ Also Incredible Music By: Myuu. Link to his superb website: https://www.thedarkpiano.com/ A HUGE Thank You To All Involved! *******************Remember, Be Safe...Not Sorry! ****************
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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:25):
Welcome to dead Man Talking tonight's show. It's been sent over by our dear
friend David Holly, and David's roadsare fantastic and extremely scary. Bugger or
werewolf encounter an attack centered in atiny cabin out in the middle of a

(00:48):
deep dark forest. The weather turnsbad and for Grandpa, father and two
sons and of course the trusty huntingdog, all looks like it's at a
loss as ever, I hope youguys enjoy this story. Please do let
me know down below in the commentswhat she thought. Of course, please
do like and share. If youhaven't subscribed to DMT, smash the subscribe

(01:11):
button and kick the notification bell intothe stratosphere to keep up to date with
all DMT content. Without further ado, let's get into tonight's story entitled The
Storyteller. Let's get straight into that. My grandfather was a hell of a

(01:33):
storyteller growing up. He kept mycousins and myself entertained with stories all about
hunting, camping, and a fishingtrips. He could also spind some truly
frightening towels about ghosts, goblin's boodfootand of course boogers. Yeah, boogers.
We ask him what a booger was, but it just ignore our question
and changed the subject. Our father'ssimply would tell us as they tucked us

(01:56):
in for the night, the groundswere simply trying to frighten us. We'd
lay there awake for a while,speculating what these horrible creatures were that he
refused to talk about. The nextmorning, we'd find Gramps spoiling his favorite
twelve gage pump shotgun and staring outtowards the deep forest which surrounded his sturdy
old cabin. In my eleventh year, during the dead of winter, my

(02:16):
uncle Josh and my cousin Paul joinedmy dad and myself for a long weekend
visit to grant cabin. There wasa hint of possible snow flowries and a
slight chance of sleet or freezing rain. Paul and I had got an excited
by the prospects of spending a longweekend at the cabin with Gramps and our
dads Grandpa medicine. We pulled intothe yard, he threw his right hand

(02:37):
up in a friendly waive. Inoticed he was carrying his shotgun in his
left hand. How are you boysdoing? He asked as he extended his
right hand and shook my hand firstand then Pauls Dad and Uncle Josh looked
on approvingly. Where's our hug,Grandpa, Paul asked. The old man
smiled. I thought you young menmight think you were getting too old for

(02:58):
that kind of stuff. I figuredhe wanted to be traded like kid fathers.
Was I wrong, he asked,with a smile on his face.
He turned to face my dad.He was still smiling, but there was
a little warmth in those eyes.His eyes continued to survey the forest surrounding
the cabin. You and Josh,and I heard him say you did bring
rifles, Yes, sir. What'sgoing on? Dad? We need to

(03:22):
run into town get some groceries forthe storm moving in. Probably going to
need extra gas for the generator.Dad, if we lose our electricity,
are we going to have any entertainment? Not to be watching DVD movies?
Grandpa smiled. There was still nowarmth in his eyes, but I understood
what he was saying. We mayneed the radio to hear the weather reports.
Sun. I think this is goingto hit and hit heart tonight's it's

(03:45):
already dropping in temperature Dad nodded.He said, we should get to pick
up unloading and get to town forour supplies. Uncle Josh volunteered to stay
with us but the cabin. Makesure we had a good fire in the
fireplace, plenty of wood for theknights, and make sure all the lanterns
and emergency candles were ready to use. Grandpa and my father turned their coat
collars up and started for the pickup. Grandpa turned to speak to Uncle Josh

(04:09):
Joshua. Oh, he never callsUncle Josh Joshua unless he was serious.
You get the wood inside. Makesure everything doors, windows, everything's tight,
don't he paused. Let our youngmen out of your side. Just
keep them by your side as youget the wood inside. I wouldn't want

(04:30):
any of the damn buggers to comesash them up. That would really piss
me off. You're listening to me, Joshua, Yes, sir, loud
and clear. Grandpa nodded his headup and down. Let's get to town
and get what we need. Jack. We need to get back before dark.
The young men listened to your UncleJosh, and don't go off this
front porch for anything. Paul turnedhis head towards Uncle Josh, he's joking

(04:53):
again, right dad. Uncle Joshlooked at Paul. You could see he
was struggling to keep from screaming.Even at a even years of age,
he knew something was eating my normallyhappy, fun loving uncle up. Still,
he managed to regain his composure.Did your grandpa act like he was
joking? Son? Before Paul couldanswer, Uncle Josh said, let's get
this wood inside and make the cabinship shape. It began sleeting shortly after

(05:15):
dark. We enjoyed a great millof homemade hamburgers and frice. The fire
in the fireplace was warm and cozy. While Grandpa did have a television set,
he didn't have a cable or asatellite dish. If he wanted to
watch television, he'd pop in aDVD in his player and settled down with
a soda or coffee and watch amovie. It should be noted here that
he loved old westerns with John Wayne, Randolph Scott's Ordrey Murphy. He also

(05:40):
the entire collection of Stargate SG one, Stargate Atlantis, and mcguiver. Horror
and sci fi had a place ofhonor in his collection, too, Mainly
every kind of movie made about bigfootsand werewolves. Following our meal, Paul
asked if we could turn the lightsdown, sit near the fire and listen
to some of Grandpa's old radio programsfrom the days before television. Paul was
partial to Awesome Wells War of theWorld's program. I wanted a good ghost

(06:02):
story. Either would do, Iremarked. Grandpa overheard me and remarks,
he didn't see why we couldn't doboth. That old man, he sure
knew how to make us happy.Grandpa sat in his overstuffed easy chair,
smoking his pipe Orson Welles was apologizingto the radio listeners about having frightened everyone
with a Mercury Theaters offering of H. G. Wells War of the Worlds.

(06:25):
He had a slight grin on hisface. Our dads had gotten into
the program just like we had.Uncle Josh turned a cassette player off.
He settled back into his chair andlit a cigarettes. Well, Dad,
what about that ghost story? Hesaid. Grandpa looked at us. Paul
and I sat at his feet,wide eyed and waiting. The old man

(06:45):
tapped the pipe bob empty and refilledit with his pipe tobacco. You boys
haven't said anything about Old Dan Iguess we hadn't even thought about him,
Grandpa, Where is he? Grandpapointed towards his bedroom door. Is in
my room, hiding under my bed, whimpering. He's scared. Oh,
Dann isn't afraid of anything, Grandpa. He told us he was the best

(07:08):
hunting and tracking dog in his pass, and he is up until a week
ago, Hell, up until yesterday. My father cleared his throat. What
happened yesterday? He came face toface with her, He paused, he
encountered a bugger. Paul and Iboth laughed. You see, over the
years would come to the conclusion thatthese buggers Grandpapa's always mentioning but wouldn't tell

(07:32):
us about, was simply a meansof keeping us in suspense, because he
couldn't think of any reason to finisha tall towel or good reason to keep
us from exploring the forest. Whilemy cousin and I laughed, neither Grandpa,
my father, or Uncle Josh didso. Uncle Josh looked troubled.
He got up and walked over tothe heavy wooden front door, checked the
heavy bolt locking the door. UncleJosh really mumbled, but I heard him

(07:53):
say under his breath. They haveto reinforce the door tomorrow. Dad.
My Dad had gone into Grandpa's roomand we could hear him. Coach and
Old Dan out from under the bed. Didn't injure him, no, but
it could have. He's a smartdog, knew when to retreat. Paul
looked at Grandpa and his two sons. I knew he was going to ask
it. Part of me didn't wantto hear it. So, guys,

(08:18):
why I saw this buger business?Real? Well? Y'all jerking me and
been around. Come on, guys, Dad, the wind began to howl.
It sounded like banshe's screaming, Dad, pauled, occurred him back from
the living room window and looked out. Ice still felt you could hear it
since it hit the metal roof ofthe cabin. A little snow's falling too,

(08:39):
now, Dad. Grandpa nodded.Old Dan slowly emerged from the bedroom
and moved to the rugbyside Grandpa's chairin fireplace. I scratched beyond the old
dog's ears. He seemed to likeit, Paul, you asked about the
buggers. Do you really want toknow about them? Yes, sir,
if they're really not made up?Just for a story, Josh, your
sons want to know. What's yourdecision. Uncle Josh looked at my dad

(09:03):
Jack. My dad sighed and lita cigarette. He pulled himself a cup
of hot coffee, and also pulledUncle Josh and Grandpa a cup. After
what seemed an eternity, he said, tell them, Dad, they're older
now than Josh and Iron. Wefound out the hard way. Your mother
was never the same after. What'sgrandma got to do with all of this?

(09:24):
She passed away when we were eight. Well, it's like this,
the story our grandfather began to recount, sounded like it might have been plot
for a poorly written exploitation horror movie, or a movie made on low budgets
and go straight to video. Tothose of you who are of the idea,
this is all make believe, Iassure you it's not here. In
his own words, as my grandfatherAnglian's booger story, booger young men is

(09:48):
for all practical purposes, living,breathing, flesh and blood werewolf. There
was no smile on his face.The fire didn't seem so cheerful, war
warm. Now, Oh, Ican see it in your eyes, See
that look on your faces. Ourgrants has lost it. I watched too
many werewolf movies. Think I don'tknow what you're thinking. Believe me,

(10:09):
I know your grandmother. Kate andI bought this place a year after we
married, got it dirt cheap.I told her for at least three years
that there had to be something wrongwith this place. Cold clear water from
natural springs, and abundance of game, no neighbors close enough to complain,
and no predators for a while.Then we began to hear the howling.
The deer population began to disappear,And when the deer population did begin to

(10:31):
drop, we began to lose acow here, a cow there. Dogs
and cats would disappear right out ofour yards. No far more ranch than
the fifty mile radius were spared.Then we'd hear of some unfortunate hitchhikers who'd
been found dead and mutilated on theside roads, campus and hunters never returning
home, but the property found abandonedtrucks, abandoned cars. Then a mother

(10:52):
was hanging clothes on a line atthe back of the house. A baby
in a crib on a front porchin a shade came up, missing.
The baby was never found. Thebaby's disappearance With the last straw, the
county put out a reward for thecapture and conviction of the personal persons who
had stolen the baby. The StockGrowers Association put a large bounty on all
coyotes all after. There were nobears, cougars, or wolves around,

(11:16):
so it had to be the coyotesor wild dogs. This continued for years.
Some years weren't so bad. Itseems whatever had been praying on that
game, livestock, pets, andsome humans had just vanished, just moved
away. When your fathers were justabout your ages, Kate took them with
her into town to buy groceries,visit her parents, and just spend a

(11:37):
day with her voice. I hadtaken a job on another farm to make
some extra cash. She arrived homean hour or so before dark. She
left Jack and Josh in a backseat while she carried groceries. Inside the
cabin, she wasn't worried about thevoice. They were reading their comic books,
and then she heard Josh screaming andJack screaming at someone, saying go
away, leave us alone, andscreaming for their mother, crying out it's

(12:00):
monster. Kate came running out ofthe house pulling a shell in an old
single shot twelve gate shotgun, andwhen she looked up from getting the shell
chambered and the barrel snapped shut,she found herself face to face with what
she said. It was a realwell wolf. She always said. It
was at least seven foot tall,and yes, boys, it was walking
comfortably on its hind legs, hadher head shaped like a wolf's and a

(12:22):
mouth full of razor sharp teeth.She shot the down thing in her chest.
It howled like bloody murder, butit moved away from the car and
ran off into the forest. Shethen got your father's out of the cart
and took them inside, locked allthe doors and windows, and pulled the
shades and closed the curtains. Justasked if that was the boogeyman, and
your grandmother said she didn't know whatit was, but it was a booger

(12:45):
I said earlier. Your grandmother wasnever the same after that. She was
determined never to be caught off guardagain. She had me by her a
pump shotgun at twelve gates I hadbeen shot in its length, and have
her some silver slugs made for thatshotgun. He reached into his front trowser
gets and pulled out three twelve gashotgun shells. These are not lead slugs,
these boys, are Kate's shells.My shotgun has the plug removed,

(13:07):
and there are five of these loadedin my gun. The booger his back
boys. Old Dan encountered him,and I had laid my money on any
bets. He's out there now inthe tree line watching this cabin. Grandpas
stretched out in his chair, hisshotgun line on the floor next to his
chair. My dad had extinguished allthe lights, saved the fire in the
fireplace and one candle. He builta fire up even higher and made me

(13:31):
a bed on the floor next thecouch which he would sleep on. Paul
and Uncle Josh slept in Grandpa's bedwith the door open. Oh Done,
lay in front of the fireplace.He did not sleep. The wind continued
to blow, but we no longerheard ice hit in the middle roof.
Snow had blanketed the roof, andas I lay on my palette, I
asked my dad softly, are youfrightened, Dad, just a little?

(13:54):
If it is watching the cabin,the snow on the ground, how are
we going to hear it, Dan, will hear it or smell it?
Watched them. I knew it waslate, but I was starting to drift
off to sleep, and I heardit how such that I had never heard
before. No Hollywood special effects insounds could ever reproduce this vocalization, and

(14:15):
its following seemed to compete with theelements themselves. Old Dan began to whimper
and cull himself in the ball.Uncle Josh came into the front room and
looked first to his brother, thento his father, Grandpa striding up in
his chair. The howling stopped asideout of relief. Then we heard the
growl, harsh, deep and guttablethe growl. The growl had come from

(14:35):
the other side of the front door. The booger had come for us.
There would be no quarter asked,none given. Over the years, my
grandpa had made modifications on the property, especially the cabin. I suppose his
friends and neighbors thought the alterations wereon behalf of Grandma Kate and the children,
and in a roundabout a way theyhad been. He replaced the original

(14:56):
front and back doors. What hadonce been standard wooden doors had now based
with solid doors made evoke. Thewindows had oak shutters, which, when
closed, were locked using a largesteel barrel bolt. The front and the
backdoors were also locked. In thismanner. Two security lights could light the
front and backyard areas. I couldnever recall at least one of them ever
being on at night. Yeah,Grandpa was a careful man, and I

(15:18):
began to understand this. Now heknew someday this monster woodward turn not for
him, not for my Dad orUncle Josh, but for his two grandsons,
and we would both be the sameages of our dads when it had
tried to take them. We watchedthe doorknob turned back and forth. Grandpa
rose from his chair and moved quietlyacross the floor towards the front door.

(15:39):
The hell was that crazy old manup to? What was up in his
mind? I screamed, there's amonster just on the other side the front
door, trying to come in.I started to scream, but my Dad's
hand resting on my shoulder and Grandpa'sfinger to my lips assured me this creature
wasn't coming in. Grandpa quietly liftedthe two by six board standing in the
corner near the door. Now Iunderstood he was bar on the door.

(16:00):
The door knobs ceased to turn.There was a bump against the door,
then a low growl, another bump, another low growl, and then the
sound of Claus scratching on the door. A third bump, angrier grouse.
The doorknob began to turn faster,harder, even angrier grouse and smiles.
And the old man stood directly infront of the door, arms crossed,
a smile on his face. Notby the hair of my chinny chin chin.

(16:25):
Mister wolf. You can huff,you can puff, and you can
push and shove, but you won'tget in. I was amazed. He
turned his back to the door andwinked at me and smiled. And there
was a genuine warmth there Now.Even old Dan began to relax. My
cousin Paul stood in the bedroom doorway, rubbing his eyes. Oh, what's
going on? Did I miss anything? When daylight arrives, the day wasn't

(16:48):
filled with bright sunshine. The skywas gray. It was apparent there would
be more snow than ice. Weate our breakfast silently. No one felt
much like talking. Grandpa refilled hiscoffee cup and walked over to one of
the two from windows, unbolted theshutters, and looked out. My Dad
moved beside him. We made itthrough the last night, Dad, I
think you'll try again. Yes,that's the nature of the beasts we have.

(17:12):
When it once Ben and Paul andyou, Josh and even me time
to kill this future beats, don'tyou think? Grandpa shook his head it
was time, he said to killthem all. Dad looked at him as
shock. Oh you think there's morethan one, then let's get Josh,

(17:32):
the boys and the dog and getthe hell out of Dodge. Dad,
nothing would make me happier, ButI'm afraid they have different ideas. He
gestured towards the tree line. Twowallflight creatures stood among the trees, watching,
and Grandpa shuts and relocked the shutters, and we were sat back down
at the table. All eyes wereon Grandpa. We're okay for the time
being, thanks to Josh and theboys bringing in all this firewood. We've

(17:55):
also got the propane tank, whichis full. I doubt they'll comprehend that
we can cook and warm our cellswith propane. Wolves are intelligent creatures,
and there's no reason to believe thesecreatures aren't also last night. At least
one of them began to probe defenses. They couldn't find a weakness in the
cabin. They'll watch a little plan. The soft snow on the ground will

(18:15):
silence their approach. And if thewind picks up again, even butter for
them. How do you know whatthey'll do, Because it's what we do
if the situation was reversed. Thestoryteller, Part two. Let's get straight

(18:37):
into that. We lost our electricityaround three in the afternoon. Dad,
little couple of oil lamps. Thegenerator was filled with gas, butts was
being kept in reserve. The windhave begun to strengthen in its intensity.
Ice had Quigan falling again, puttingeven more unwanted stressed in the tree limbs
already weighed down with the heavy coatingsof ice. All around us. We

(18:57):
could hear limbs breaking off from thetrees. Each break sounded like a gunshot.
Dads and Uncle Josh sat at theiron table playing checkers. Paul SATs
on the floor in front of thefireplace, reading a comic book. I
sat next to Old Dan, scratchingbehind it is and simply enjoying his company.
My Grandpa. For the most ofthe afternoon. He'd been reading a
book, The Hound of the Baskervilles. Say what you will. The old

(19:21):
man had a wicked sense of humorAt times. While we were surrounded by
a pack of stiling werewolves, mygrandfather was reading the Sharlock Holmes Tower.
The cabin was warm and cozy,and we had food and drink. We
had weapons, and we enjoyed eachother's company. And if these wolf creatures
hadn't had as under siege, I'dhave found this all rather enjoyable. We
ate silently that second night, nolaughter, no jokes, no small talk

(19:42):
about school girlfriends or our mothers.We cleared the table and moved towards the
fireplace. When it came three liketaps on the front door. Uncle Josh
walked towards the door. Grandpa stoppedhim. What are you doing, Josh?
Someone's knocking at the door. Soit may be someone cold and needing
help. Who I don't know.Maybe they cast slid off the road and

(20:04):
and Grandpa rose from his chair.Maybe it's one of those creatures. Your
intentions are good, Sun, butthey're still trying to get inside. If
it was someone who need to help, they'd be banging on the door and
calling out for help during a course, no go sit by the fire with
your son. Tap tap tap,this time in a window pane. I

(20:25):
hear you're knocking, but you ain'tcoming in. Yes, Grandpa had a
wicked sense of humor. I haveno way of knowing if it was the
creature which had tried to get insidethe first night, but it seemed to
repeat what had been done on theprevious night, unearthly growls and snarling,
trying to splinter the door after itfailed to open using the doorknob. We
heard a window break with the shuttersheld, and from the back door we

(20:47):
began hearing the doorknob being violently turned. And then they're bumping on the heavy
oak doors. More snarls and morehowling. During all of this, one
thought leapt into mind. Where Grandpa'sneighbors also experiencing these types of attacks?
Did they even we were in danger? And if they suspected we were in
danger, would any of them cometo help Grandpa? Your neighbors? I

(21:07):
shouted, what about mister and missusSpencer. I suspect Andy and Louise got
out yesterday afternoon, ben if fatherand I saw them in town buying groceries,
and they were staying with Andy's brotherand his family until the storm blows
over. Do you think they probablyhe's been losing a few hogs lately.
He probably read the signs as wellas I did. I was more hopeful
they were just migrating somewhere else.The attack lasted for nearly an hour.

(21:30):
Grandpa was beginning to look tired.I wondered how much longer we could hold
out. The same thoughts must havebeen going through his mind. Also,
fellows if we can all pile intothat pickup in the morning, if it's
not snowing and sleeping, I thinkwe can pull out. Can't stay here,
put him you for at risk anylonger? Try to get some sleep.
Sleep came, but it wasn't peaceful. I had nightmares with my family

(21:52):
being torn apart and devoured by thesemonsters. I dreamed of my grandmother,
who shot one, wishing she washere with us. I woke to the
sound of Dad's pickup running. Hewas clearing the windshield of ice and snow.
Paul sat in the backward down witha panic look about him. Uncle
Josh stood from one sided a pickup, watching for the werewolves. Grandpa on
the other, I stepped out intothe front porch. My mum had always

(22:14):
told me, regardless of where Iwas and who I was with, to
always be aware of my surroundings andnever assume I forgot. I noticed a
large pile of soft snow at theedge of the porch. Hey, that
was a dumb kid. Looking aroundto make sure there were no hairy monsters
around. I leapt onto the moundsof snow. As soon as I made
contact, I knew I was dead. Meats, the mount exploded upwards and

(22:36):
I was in a grasp of aseven foot tall monster. I managed to
scream, but before my dad anduncle could save me, the wherewolf leapt
away from the front porch of thecabin. He made his way down to
decide of the cabin even rapidly.In moments, it would enter the forest.
Like so many others before me,I would become another missing person.
I heard a voice in Grandpa immergedfrom the corner of the house that we
snarled at him and release me ben. My grandpa said, stay down,

(23:00):
stay down. The creature roared andbegan advancing towards my grandfather. My own
father was beside me. The creaturecontinued to stalk towards Grandpa. If there
was fear in him, he refusedto show him. Keep coming, your
grim son of a bitch, Katewanted me to give you this. The
creature sprang and Grandpap agan shooting highgrade silver, slamming into the creature's chest.
It shrieked, turned into an effortto escape, and three more silver

(23:23):
pack slugs tore into it. MyDad lowered his shotgun and we watched the
creature pitched forward the silver, puttingthem down for the count. Uncle Josh
and Paul came running to the sideof the cabin. Uncle Josh side,
Oh, can we leave now?This was fourteen years ago. My grandfather
still lives there. He's seventy fiveyears old now, but he still keeps
watch. Old Dawn passed away acouple of years after the booger's attack on

(23:47):
the cabin. My cousin Paul isnow married and has a pretty little baby
girl. Dad and Uncle Josh Iown and operate a construction company specializing in
survival cabins. Me whoa I wrotefor Dad and Uncle Joe and I go
to Grandpa's and help him watch severaltimes a year. Oh and by the
way, on his seventy fourth birthday, I had a satellite dish installed where

(24:07):
he could keep up with a lotsof the old movies. German Shepherd Pup
he now calls young Dun Wow Wow. I hope you guys enjoyed. That's
wonderful, fantastically scary and intense Wherewolffour booker story there sent over by my

(24:33):
great friend and cryptid researcher David Holly, is also sent over before the true
encounters that you had with dog Manand Sasquatch and Hi himself and his research
team are actually pacing together some morestories to share with us folks, So
very very pleased with that. Also, if you have the time, don't
forget to check out the Cabin inthe Woods DMTS Cabin in the Woods Facebook

(24:56):
group, where David has been kindenough to share a lot of his exclusive
research and evidence pictures of a princeand cast that were taken and some of
the backstory behind those very very interestingstuff. And I can't thank him enough
again for all the inputs him andhis team have supported me in the show
with really do appreciate it. Pleaseplease do let us know down below what

(25:18):
your thoughts. As ever, pleasedo like and share, and don't forget
to hashtag team fear. And remember, if you're going up to your old
grandpa's cabin in a deep dark forest, check out the shutters and make sure
the nice and sturdy, make surethe front doors of good, solid oak
wood, and above all remember besafe, not sorry,
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CrimeLess: Hillbilly Heist

CrimeLess: Hillbilly Heist

It’s 1996 in rural North Carolina, and an oddball crew makes history when they pull off America’s third largest cash heist. But it’s all downhill from there. Join host Johnny Knoxville as he unspools a wild and woolly tale about a group of regular ‘ol folks who risked it all for a chance at a better life. CrimeLess: Hillbilly Heist answers the question: what would you do with 17.3 million dollars? The answer includes diamond rings, mansions, velvet Elvis paintings, plus a run for the border, murder-for-hire-plots, and FBI busts.

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